#it was originally supposed to be today (w/ a thirty day grace period) | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

herr-toyota · 4 years ago

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What the fuck has this week been? ‘Cause really, it was shit...

Monday: heard from the last person I want to speak with

Tuesday: found out my dad’s work is getting rid of his position later this year

Wednesday: while driving, saw one of the dumbasses who tormented me senior year and I was legit scared for a sec that he was going to try and ram my car or something dumb like that

Thursday: ...actually decent but I still procrastinated too much and was nearly late for work

Friday: finally got a text back from the light of my life! ...And damn near ended up calling the suicide hotline because I never thought I’d live this long and I don’t know what to do with myself even though I’m signed up for school (and I exist in this weird grey area between wishing I didn’t exist but not wanting to kill myself either... but my intrusive thoughts were bad today and I wanted to be on the safe side)

#i am so fucking tired #also if anyone has good recs for loan companies PLEASE let me know #i already know to avoid fannie mae/ navient #i have no fucking clue when my first payment is due but i need to figure this shit out #it was originally supposed to be today (w/ a thirty day grace period)#but then off-campus people are supposed to get a revised billing statement on the 25th? idk wtf's going on anymore #that last part was mentioned once and hasn't been mentioned since so i legit don't fucking know #can't do shit this weekend either way since the parent who would cosign my shit is gone rn #i seriously want to cry though how the fuck did my life end up here #i hate this grey area between wanting to exist or not exist and being fine but not being fine #i'm so tired of this existence #if there are any aliens out there reading this for some reason i give you full consent to abduct me #i'm dead serious

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