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elysianslove · 4 years ago

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HAIKYUU MASTERLIST ━━

(*) is smut!

i edit this as i post more! <3

MASTERLIST FOR ALL 1K+ WORKS!

MASTERLIST FOR ALL NSFW DRABBLES!

ACCIDENT NUDE SEND MASTERLIST!

GENERAL

all the little things

cheering you up

*prettiest moans ranking

*captains’ moans

haikyuu boys in the delivery room

special relationship thing

calling them arabic terms of endearment

most likely to fall in love with a fake partner

preferred honeymoon destination, part 2

boys that would love a muscular s/o

*who can, can’t, and more, handle edging

*boys that prefer choking/prefer getting choked

*hottest grunts ranking

*getting passed and railed by msby

*haikyuu captains dick analysis

*haikyuu aces dick analysis

*haikyuu setters dick analysis

*haikyuu midldle blockers dick analysis

haikyuu boys and tropes that would suit them

what falling in love with them sounds like, part 2

*haikyuu cum review

*haikyuu visuals & complimentary drabbles

haikyuu boys as unintentionally flustering things

*random & specific nsfw headcanons

waxing the haikyuu captains

*types of slappers

*boys into sounding

*boys that get off while on the phone w/ you

MULTIPLE PART FICS/SERIES

*iwaizumi and his camgirl best friend

part 1, part 2, secrets that you keep (part 3)

comforting insecure osamu

*part 1, part 2

*suna and his virgin boyfriend

part 1, part 2, part 3

surrogate series

being iwaoi’s surrogate, being sakuatsu’s surrogate

KARASUNO HIGH

headcanons

mornings with kageyama

working out/yoga with kageyama

working out/yoga with nishinoya

daichi finding out you can rap

scarlet witch!reader

hinata saved by jujutsu sorcerer!reader

tsukishima saved by jujutsu sorcerer!reader

asahi with a germaphobe s/o

sugawara with a germaphobe s/o

tsukishima crushing on an intimidating but clumsy!reader

asahi fluff headcanons

some boyfriend!kageyama

sfw drabbles

kageyama and practice kissing

secret relationship outed; tanaka

sweet revenge

1k Event — Character Studies

nishinoya yū

daichi sawamura

asahi azumane

kageyama tobio

AOBA JOHSAI HIGH

headcanons

tutoring oikawa

mornings with matsukawa

working out/yoga with oikawa

oikawa as your roommate

iwaizumi as your roommate

best friends to lovers with iwaizumi

best friends to lovers with oikawa

oikawa finding out you can rap

scarlet witch!reader

oikawa with a touch starved s/o

iwaizumi with a bitchy but secretly sweet s/o

oikawa flirting with ushijima’s twin sister

matsukawa with a tall s/o

some cuddling with mattsun

oikawa & his twin girls learning spanish

fluff headcanons for iwaizumi

oikawa’s hands

artist!mattsun

sfw drabbles

stopping time; iwaizumi

aftercare with matsukawa

spending the night with matsukawa

1k Event — Character Studies

oikawa tōru

iwaizumi hajime

NEKOMA HIGH

headcanons

kuroo tutoring you

working out/yoga with kuroo

kuroo as your roommate

best friends to lovers with kuroo

kuroo finding out you can rap

scarlet witch!reader

kenma with a touch starved s/o

kuroo with a bitchy but secretly sweet s/o

kuroo with an s/o that has a phobia of blood

kenma with a really beautiful s/o

kuroo saved by jujutsu sorcerer!reader

kenma saved by jujutsu sorcerer!reader

kuroo with a really beautiful s/o

kenma with a germaphobe s/o

*camboy!kenma

sfw drabbles

mornings with kenma

kuroo’s birthday surprise

revelation; kuroo

secret relationship outed; taketora

500 Follower Event

kenma — kissing in the rain

kenma — “i made you a playlist”

*kenma — breeding kink, manhandling/rough sex

1k Event ━ Character Studies

kozume kenma

kuroo tetsurō

FUKURODANI ACADEMY

headcanons

akaashi tutoring you

mornings with bokuto

working out/yoga with bokuto

bokuto finding out you can rap

bokuto with an s/o that has a phobia of blood

akaashi with an s/o that has a phobia of blood

akaashi saved by jujutsu sorcerer!reader

akaashi with a really beautiful s/o

bokuto comforting you

*dilf!bokuto

sfw drabbles

love you, infinitely; akaashi

puppy dog eyes; bokuto

the taste of you; akaashi

dancing among the trees; akaashi

the world is not enough for you; akaashi

500 Follower Event

akaashi — kissing away their tears, first “i love you.”

1k Event — Character Studies

bokuto kōtarō

akaashi keiji

SHIRATORIZAWA ACADEMY

headcanons

ushijima naming his plants after you

ushijima finding out you can rap

tendō with an s/o with cold hands

semi crushing on a vb player!reader

shirabu crushing on a vb player!reader

ushijima with a really beautiful s/o

oikawa flirting with ushijima’s twin sister

sfw drabbles

rainy days; semi

500 Follower Event

shirabu — deep 3 am talks, neck kisses

INARIZAKI HIGH

headcanons

atsumu as your roommate

kita finding out you can rap

atsumu with a bitchy but secretly sweet s/o

atsumu with an s/o with cold hands

kita with a really beautiful s/o

atsumu with a really beautiful s/o

osamu with a really beautiful s/o

atsumu crushing on a vb player!reader

osamu crushing on a vb player!reader

suna crushing on a vb player!reader

kita saved by jujutsu sorcerer!reader

suna with a really beautiful s/o

osamu crushing on an intimidating but clumsy!reader

suna smacking your ass

kissing the wrong twin when drunk

atsumu taking care of his sick s/o

dates with osamu

miya twins with a younger sister

suna fluff headcanons

brother’s best friend suna

osamu when you’re on your period

sfw drabbles

osamu pining after onigiri miya!employee

showering atsumu in appreciation

miya twins finding out about suna’s boyfriend

suna’s boyfriend riding the same travel bus as the vbc

pampering atsumu

prince!osamu x commoner!reader

never not worthy; miya twins

reminder; suna

500 Follower Event

atsumu — hurting their s/o verbally, kissing away their tears

*atsumu — make up sex, praise kink

*osamu — make up sex, praise kink

1k Event — Character Studies

suna rinatarō

miya osamu

miya atsumu

kita shinsuke

JOHZENJI HIGH

headcanons

terushima finding out you can rap

DATE TECH

headcanons

futakuchi finding out you can rap

ITACHIYAMA INSTITUTE

headcanons

sakusa with a really beautiful s/o

sakusa crushing on a vb player!reader

sakusa crushing on an intimidating but clumsy!reader

sfw drabbles

unexpected; sakusa

KAMOMEDAI HIGH

1k Event ━ Character Studies

hoshiumi kōrai

NOHEBI ACADEMY

1k Event ━ Character Studies

daishō suguru

#haikyuu masterlist #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu smut

5K notes · View notes

everseeking · 4 years ago

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hello!! It's your relief story anon!!! i friken love what you wrote!!! may i have another request 🥺 similar to the relief story, Levi's s/o gets into a near death experience right in front of him and he freezes for the first time. everyone's super shocked abt it after the mission and he gets reprimanded just for formalities (erwin n hanji rlly just wanna check up on him personally) but they all understand since he's been through a lot. Levi can't deal with his emotions and he wants to say i love you to his s/o (first time saying it) but he doesn't know how and yes HAHAHAHA

- OMG HI AGAIN ! IM SO HAPPY THAT YOU ENJOYED IT THANK YOU SO MUCH !!!!! thank you again not only for requesting that, but also for requesting again, it’s so awesome when u guys come back and request more :) plus your ideas are always so great. i had a lot of fun writing this, i hope u enjoy <3 (and i got your second message tysm for adding it ! i tried to include as much fluff as possible but my dumb brain always defaults to angst hahaha)

how to say i love you

- levi ackerman x reader

warnings: season 2 and ova spoilers (if you haven’t watched the ova’s yet they’re on youtube but this only references ‘a choice with no regrets’ aka levi’s ova)

levi has never had...feelings for anyone before.

the romantic kind, of course. he's felt plenty of things towards people on a regular basis—anger. hate. disgust. confusion. annoyance. frustration.

to be fair he has had the occasional friend, or the occasional person who he respected, and others who he flat out wanted to protect. just never anything romantic.

this didn’t bother him, falling in love wasn’t his top priority or anything. his life has been one traumatic experience after the other. there was no time for him to be romantically involved with another, nor was he willing to take the risk of potential heartbreak that would add to his constantly growing list of traumatic events.

when he first met y/n l/n he acknowledged her as nothing more than another member of the survey corps. someone he would work with. someone he would train with. someone who he would give orders to if deemed necessary. someone who would join his team. someone he would slowly become more curious about. someone who would bring him feelings that he couldn't describe in words.

his plans had clearly gone astray.

y/n was supposed to be nothing more than a colleague, but somehow fate had much more in store. the young girl began to appear more and more in his life and before he could even process it, she was already apart of his team.

now that the they were spending almost everyday together, along with the rest of his team, levi had the opportunity to try to solve the mystery that was y/n.

there was something that he felt about her that he couldn't put into words. the way she was determined to save humanity and her friends, the way she poured everything she had into everything she did, the way she was strong in every aspect of the word, the way she got along with the rest of the team, the way she laughed, the way she smiled, the way she spoke, the way she moved, all of it. it all encapsulated him.

what is this emotion ? fascination ? curiosity ? these words weren’t completely right, but they safe enough for him to settle on for now.

yes, that's all. the brat just makes me curious because i don't understand her.

at least, that's what he told himself. but the tingles that remained on his skin from the place where she accidentally brushed up against him or the way his stomach felt after his eyes met hers or the way he noticed himself always wanting to be near her or the way he wanted to protect her more than anything in the world, said otherwise.

whatever message he wanted to send probably definitely was not passed on. when y/n accidentally brushed up against him he snapped back "watch it." when she made eye contact with him, it was more her meeting his eyes and him seemingly glaring back. when he took a few steps towards her to be closer, she felt paranoid, wondering if he was determining whether or not he should scold her for something. when she was on missions and he occasionally had to step in and save her tail, she felt like she was slacking.

truthfully in all these situations levi just resorted back to his true nature. he never meant any harm so clearly he wasn’t the best at expressing his feelings. henceforth, the three word phrase was foreign to him.

after all the many challenges that came with trying to understand each other, the couple finally got together. but despite being together, neither had said the 'L word’ yet.

to be honest, y/n hadn’t dwelled on it too much. she had learned the best way to survive mentally was to live in the moment. when the time would come, the time would come, however, the thought that time wasn’t a guarantee gnawed at the back of her brain. she always wondered how levi felt about the matter, but never got around to asking. little did he know he’d once again find out for himself that time wasn’t a guarantee.

just like every other day, y/n awoke to levi placing a kiss on her forehead. he wished nothing more than to let the love of his life sleep late into the morning in their shared bed, safe from the dangers of the world, but there was another mission today in which he needed her by his side.

the plan was to head to the outskirts of wall rose to a forest that was known to be surrounded by titans. hanji convinced erwin to let her try to capture titans in the forest again, as it all but worked on the female titan. erwin agreed, not only because he too believed the survey corps had all the materials necessary to capture titans again, but also because he knew the scouts needed more real time practice in the forest. levi wasn’t happy to hear the commander refer to this as “practice,” since so many lives were guaranteed to be lost in the process, but there was nothing he could do about it.

with everyone’s approval and the preparations complete, they were off. the ride there had been as close to smooth sailing as possible, with erwin successfully rerouting the troops to avoid as many unnecessary collisions with titans as possible and a surprisingly low amount of abnormals in their path. but everyone knew the real problems would be up ahead.

in this area, the titans were mainly surrounding the thick trees in the forest. it wasn’t too far from the forest where they encountered the female titan so the layout of the jungle was fairly similar. a large path ran straight through the trees, leaving the scouts lots of opportunities.

before the forest itself came into view, the hoard otherworldly creatures showed up. the crowd of titans didn’t seem to be too bad, with none surpassing ten meters. a bit of the outer edges of the formation took a hit, but everyone else made it into the woods unscathed.

unlike the last time levi’s squad was in the forest, their objective was not to be the bait. instead, they were to take to the trees and be on clean up duty. it was a little different from their normal clean up duty, as they weren’t doing chores around the castle or cabin—they were eliminating stray titans. the survey corps was only prepared to capture two titans, so any others that entered needed to be exterminated.

they weren’t the only ones with this job, but erwin placed them as the last hoop the titans had to get through before they were captured. any titans that escaped the first few groups were more likely than not going to be challenging, so they needed to be left with the most talented squad.

the eight scouts that made up levi’s squad traveled the path that cut through the forest until they found the four trees in which they were to set up camp. levi and jean were on the first tree, armin and sasha on the one across from them, connie and mikasa on the next, and y/n and eren on the fourth. the formation placed y/n and levi diagonal from each other so they could each defend half of the younger scouts in their squad if necessary, as well as had the team in pairs that weren’t often together for even more practice.

the ground rumbled beneath the group as they looked down to see the first wave of soldiers acting as bait pass through. after some time and a few more waves, including hanji and erwin who were in charge of the traps, everyone passed through and the titans came into sight.

the ground troops had all reported that no abnormals or titans above ten meters made it in so they all relaxed—or relaxed as one can be when they’re facing man-eating giants. levi recognized the last troop passing through and gave his second in command a nod which she returned, letting everyone else know it was show time.

the rumbling of the ground from the horses before was nothing compared to that of the titans. not counting the first two, there were nine titans in all. everyone gave a silent thanks to the squads who had narrowed down the hoard before it arrived to them.

finally, the first two titans ran past the trees levi’s squad was hidden in, chasing the ground troops. with a loud “now !” from levi, the rest of them deployed from their hiding places. thanks to the squad’s impeccable teamwork and countless hours of training in forests closer to home, the remaining seven titans were taken out without a hitch. y/n couldn’t help but feel a sense of pride as she watched her team improve with every mission and it was obvious they all felt the same way. the way they beamed and had to hold back their celebration was as a clear as day.

the team regrouped, with y/n checking the younger members for any life threatening wounds and levi double checking all the titans were taken care of. she had just finished examining sasha when levi came back and announced the next step of today’s plan. everyone was to head forward to meet the other troops and aid in getting the titans back to the walls. although the titans may be secured, there were still infinite possibilities for catastrophes that could happen so they needed all the backup they could get. the young cadets nodded in agreement then followed after levi as he took to the sky, with y/n tailing the rest of the group. if y/n and levi weren’t side by side during missions, this was always the formation everyone fell into. levi led the way, protecting the front of the party, and she acted as the caboose to make sure no one got left behind as well as to protect them from the back.

after a few failed tricks from eren as he tried to show off with his gear and a quick scolding from levi, the rest of the scouts came into view. the mission appeared to be a success. the final two titans were both apprehended, one nailed to the ground and the other bound in the air.

squad levi landed and began to greet everyone but didn’t get very far when hanji’s squeals flooded everyone’s ears.

the scientist was practically bouncing up and down as she came over. “squad levi ! all in one piece, i see. let me show you what we’ve done,” she gushed, ushering all of them towards the titans.

it was no surprise she was so excited. she had been waiting for this day to arrive for ages, but levi still gave a quick “tch,” under his breath out of annoyance which forced y/n to cover her mouth with her palm to stifle a laugh.

the eight, now nine, of them cranned their necks up to see the side of the beast that was hammered into the ground. the sight would’ve been cruel if it were anything other than a titan, but remembering all the pain they’ve brought to each one of them, no one did so much as bat an eye. returning the focus back to hanji, everyone watched as she took a sharp inhale to prepare for her long ramble about how everything worked. lucky for y/n, before hanji could exhale, levi grabbed his partner’s arm and pulled her away.

he pulled her close so he could whisper in her ear, “come on, let’s go find erwin.”

as much as she wanted to argue with him and tell him he was being mean, she really didn’t want to listen to hanji’s spiel that she had heard a million times over. a tiny pang of guilt struck y/n for leaving the other half of the squad behind forced to listen to her, but sometimes everyone has to take one for the team.

she threw a quick wave over her shoulder to the others, then followed levi, who was still holding her arm, as he dragged her through the crowd of other scouts who were just floating around, waiting for orders, until he finally spotted the commander.

the tall man’s eyes fell upon the pair and he drew himself away from whomever he was speaking with to come greet them.

“ah levi, y/n,” erwin began. levi’s expression stayed the same but y/n offered the man a small smile and wave which he returned with a nod. erwin was actually the one who recommended to levi that he should consider y/n to be apart of his squad, so she heavily credited him entirely with starting your relationship with levi (even if levi disagreed every time she told him this).

levi and erwin fell into formal conversation, discussing the remainder of the mission, which left y/n realizing levi hadn’t really saved her from a talk you’ve heard countless times before, but instead brought her into another one.

hanji’s rambling would have been more interesting than this she thought to yourself as she began lazily scanned the small sea of scouts scrambling around, looking for a way to entertain yourself until the two men were done talking. one group in particular caught her eyes.

the soldiers seemed to be much more jittery than everyone else. they frantically looked amongst each other and towards the titan that hanji had just finished showing the rest of levi’s squad, and seemed to be contemplating a solution to an unknown issue.

it was clear something was up.

just as she placed her hand on levi’s shoulder to bring his and erwin’s focus over to the scene, the ground began to shake, which caught their attention for her.

no one had time to react when dust flew up everywhere, obstructing everyone’s views so they couldn’t see where the loud crashes that followed came from. a strong force slammed into them, throwing them who knows how far into the air. the fear of hitting the ground barely had enough time to settle into y/n before everything went dark.

everyone in the vicinity had been sent flying into the air along, but levi was the first one to be up on his feet again. bringing his arms up to shield his eyes, he decided to stay where he was as the dust cleared so he could assess the situation and move on from there.

the scene finally came into view; he gathered that the titan had ripped its arm through the nails that secured it to the floor of the woods, then flailed it around in an attempt to grab people. it made a clean sweep in the area that he was previously standing—all that was left were debris and broken wood planks from the compartments that were attached to the other titan’s traps.

a wave of adrenaline passed through his body as he remembered who was with him. he needed to find not only erwin immediately, but also y/n. he reached down to grab the handles of his controller grip but froze instantly upon seeing what had just come into view as more of the dust cleared.

y/n was sprawled out on the ground, ODM gear tossed a few feet away from her body but more importantly, the titan’s hand was hovering mere meters above her.

his pulse almost quickened twicehold, but it felt as though it heart had stopped in his chest. situations like this presented themselves to levi almost everyday of his life, but this was much different. in those, he was almost two steps ahead. he knew that by now he should be wrapping his arms around y/n and pulling her to safety at breakneck speed, or even better, he should’ve shielded her from harm at the very beginning. but right now he couldn’t do so much as move his finger.

levi was completely inert—his arms felt like they being weighed down by a ball and chain, his legs felt like they had grown roots into the ground that planted in him place. his throat ran dry and his stomach felt like it had just done a flip. the rest of him went numb while shock consumed his body, physically and mentally, rendering him entirely helpless.

images of isabel, farlan, petra, oluo, eld, gunther, and countless others all flashed before him, the same running theme echoed in his mind—he wasn’t able to save them. all he had to do was pull back a single index finger. this would launch one of his anchors into the back of the titan’s neck, sending him flying to slice its nape. but he couldn’t do it. the only thing he knew he had the power to do was watch helplessly as his partner would be eaten alive.

the shouts of others flooded his ears as his senses slowly began to return to him, but it didn’t matter. he couldn’t make out a thing. frankly he wished he could so he could break away from the things that occupied his mind now. shame. guilt. humiliation. fear. regret. he took for granted every moment he had ever spent with y/n. every smile she gave him. every time he embraced her. every kiss. every conversation they shared under the stars while everyone else was fast asleep. every opportunity he had but failed to tell her that he—

before he finished his thought someone finally broke through his trance. erwin was the one who was able to crack the surface and bring him back to life.

the commander was shouting levi’s name, hoping, praying, to wake him up from whatever was going on in his head. levi was still unable feel his body, but he realized he was moving as the ground began to grow smaller. one of erwin’s strong arms hooked around levi’s middle and they were flying away from the chaos below. the commander spared a glance to levi to see the man’s eyes were still trained on y/n.

the feeling returned to levi’s body as he felt the pain of being thrown onto one of the thick tree branches surge through his body. not knowing how else to bring him back from the trance that wasn’t full broken, erwin had tossed off of him levi instead of placing him down gently.

he watched as levi scrambled up and expected him to yell back for throwing him, but the response was much different.

“where is she ??” levi demanded. his eyes may have been on y/n the whole time, but his mind was elsewhere replaying scenes from the past. he had no idea if she had been eaten, or even survived the initial attack. the only think he saw was her body on the ground, unmoving.

“safe,” erwin confirmed. “hanji ran over just in time and got her. but what happened to you ?” no one had ever seen levi freeze up the way he did. others believed it was just fear which made him seem a little more human to them, but erwin knew it was more than that.

throughout the years, erwin watched levi witness the deaths of those closest to him, and even then he was still able to act. but after seeing him go rigid, erwin was more than worried. it was clear levi went into shock, however, shock runs more than skin deep.

this became even more evident to him as levi remained silent the entire way back to the walls. y/n was still unconscious, so one of the open carts was her escort. guilt continued to wash over levi as he wasn’t able to ride in the cart with her to monitor her closely because he had to ride his horse back. regardless, he stayed as close to the cart as possible and stole as many glances her way as he could.

if he had it his way, he would’ve waited outside the infirmary for y/n when they arrived back home, but hanji and erwin practically dragged him to the mess hall to replenish his energy. this may or may not be skipping the part where levi was questioned about what happened, followed by him being chastised for his actions (or lack there of). levi could bare focus even though it was such a serious conversation. his mind was still a hazy mess. as much as hanji and erwin wanted to talk to levi more about the situtation, they knew it was best for the conversation to end there for the day. levi looked so shaken up that he could barely keep himself standing so the last thing he needed was to be yelled at more. the entire corps also made sure to steer clear of the man. he usually had all his emotions hidden but they were on full display now. it still scared the hell out of them.

but the fear alone wasn’t enough to stop them from whispering to themselves. word carried fast about how captain levi froze up and watched one of his squad mates almost die. the ones who only heard about the story instead of witnessing it couldn’t believe what they were hearing. the captain levi did nothing while one of his own almost became titan food ?

hearing the whispers in passing, levi didn’t care that they were talking about him, but he was still affected. their words just made reality sink deeper into him. they weren’t the only ones who were unable to believe what happened. he really just watched helplessly as someone almost died. and it wasn’t just someone, it was his other half.

“hey levi ?” hanji voiced, pulling him out of his head. levi didn’t bother looking up from his food that he had been staring at for the past few minutes to face her. the best he could to was give her a side glance as he peered at her from the corner of his eyes and waited for her to finish.

the glare he was sending her way made her blood run cold, but she took the hint and continued. “are you alright ?” she asked in a small voice.

“does it look like i’m alright ?” he growled back, then went back to eating.

“just wanted to ask,” she added with an awkward laugh then turned to erwin who was on the other side of her. for once in her life she knew not to press any harder, but making levi upset wasn’t her intention. she was genuinely worried about him. hanji gave erwin a what do i do now ? look, hoping for some help, but erwin could only shake his head. he cared about levi just as much as she did, but he knew there was nothing either of them could do or say to make levi feel better. the only thing he needed was to see y/n.

at last, levi finished his dinner and excused himself to go find his partner. as his feet carried him at a quick pace across the stone floors of the many hallways in HQ, fear came back to his already grim mind. there was no word on y/n’s condition so he assumed no progress had been made and she was still unconscious.

needless to say, when he rounded the corner and saw her sitting on the bench right outside the infirmary swiveling her heels and tapping her toes together as if she was bored, shock overcame him once again, this time on a much lower scale. similar to just a few hours ago, he was frozen instantly upon seeing her. it was a much prettier sight this time, but it was still painful to see. the bandage that wrapped around her head peaked out from being any strands of hair that fell in front of her face, other wraps and patches plastered themselves across her arms and legs, and some purple and blue splotches peaked out from behind them. this was only the skin that was exposed. for once in his life levi didn’t want to think about what she looked like when she weren’t wearing any clothes. he made a quick mental note to later place tender kisses on all her bumps and bruises, and took of running towards her.

y/n had been discharged from the infirmary during dinner hours, so the halls has been quite empty as she sat outside alone, falling into boredom. when the first sounds of shoes hitting the ground entered her ears, she got a bit excited, but calmed herself down reminding herself it probably wasn’t him. but when the steps got quicker and louder, she finally let yourself look up to see up to see her partner was the source. there was no point in holding back anyone; her face visibly lit up and a wide smile placed itself on her lips. just like levi, y/n wanted nothing more in the entire world than to see him.

he run turned to a jog then a complete stop as he halted in front of her. despite being so anxious to see one another, neither were really prepared. they just kinda...stared at each other, neither sure of the right words to say. levi decided to take the initiative. he opened his mouth, hoping something, anything, would come out, but his attempt fell flat. words just weren’t enough. instead, he lifted his arms and placed both hands gently on y/n’s shoulders. she caught on quickly, standing up at the same time as he was pulling her into his arms for a tight embrace.

the pair remained silent in each other’s arms until y/n decided to take initiative this time and finally spoke. “is it true ?” she mumbled against his neck, barely loud enough for him to hear.

as much as he had hoped the gossip would stay in the mess hall, levi knew that inevitably word would spread to her. someone must have told her everything that happened, leaving in every little detail about how levi made no moves to save her life, ending up having to be saved by hanji in the end.

based off his silence, y/n knew levi had a lot on his mind so she continued “did you really freeze up?”

he didn’t realize it, but he had tensed up at her words. it absolutely pained him to answer, but he couldn’t imagine the pain she were feeling.

summing up his courage, he began to confirm the worst, but she pulled away before he could get more than a “yes,” out. levi braced himself for the hurt expression that he would be faced with, knowing his heart would break instantly as she realized he truly did failed to protect her, but instead he was met with kind eyes and soft face.

the look on his face had utter disbelief written all over it as her hands went up to cup his face that was now reddening. “are you okay?” y/n asked softly. “im so sorry.”

levi was beyond bewildered. he wanted her to be furious at him. yell at him. pull her soft hands back and strike him as much as she pleased. tell him he failed and that she couldn’t stand the sight of him. he knew he deserved it all and more, but he should’ve known she would never do that. that wasn’t y/n.

he melted into her touch and placing one of his hand over one of hers that remained on his cheek. “i was terrified, y/n.”

y/n finally gave him one of her beautiful smiles and giggled softly. “why were you scared ? i was the one who almost got eaten,” she teased.

y/n’s laughs had quickly subsided after seeing the serious look that had etched itself onto levi’s face. “because you were in danger,” he started.

“i don’t know what id do with myself if i lost you, i...”

“i love you, y/n.”

it was finally y/n’s turn to get a taste of the shock that levi had been experiencing all day. she could’ve sworn her heart skipped a beat at his words, followed by butterfly wings tickling the inside of her tummy, her eyes widening and jaw falling slack. her hands slowly slipped from his face to instead place one of her palms on her chest to make sure her heart was indeed pumping at a regular pace.

levi, on the other hand, was not having a magical experience. y/n’s reaction made him feel as though his feelings weren’t reciprocated despite having been together for so long. he started to get deeper into his head, negative thoughts starting to eat away at him once again, when she finally spoke.

“i love you too, levi,” she breathed out, still too stunned to breathe properly.

levi had had enough of being unable to move for one day. one of his hands grabbed y/n’s waist while the other found its way to the back of her head, as he kissed her roughly, which she eagerly returned. the way he felt her grin against his lips was enough to make all the pain and fear he had experienced that day worth it.

he couldn’t have asked for a better outcome to such a shitty day.

levi had finally learned how to say i love you and he thanked the stars every night following that day that y/n was the one who taught him how.

#attack on titan #aot #attack on titan x reader #aot x reader #shingeki no kyojin #snk #shingeki no kyojin x reader #snk x reader #levi ackerman #levi ackermann #levi ackerman x reader #levi ackermann x reader #levi x reader

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kingpoet · 3 years ago

Note

LILLLLYYYYY HAPPY BIRTHDAY BELOVED!!!!!! Wishing you an absolutely wonderful one today ilysvm literal angel . Sending all my love & a million billion kisses💗💞🏖🥂🎂💋❣️<333!!!!! beaming warm thoughts & infinite hugs at u, ... 🤍❕here's 2 another yr of beautiful memories lovely!!!! (P.S. typed ILLLYYYY accidentally at the v beginning of my msg and went . hm. so accurate lilly = illllyyyyy !..)

DAWNNNN i saw this before class and u literally got me thru the day my beloveddd 🥺💖😭😭 im speechless ur so kind ...🏌️‍♂️💞 i hope u ate something delicious today & listened to ur favorite song ^_^ a million kisses to u here’s some cake 🍰 AND a nice book to read... <3 📚🐥 wishing u a wonderful spring!!! <3 🍯🧸🎈

#brb gotta sign my emails w illlllyyyy from now on 🏃‍♀️💞#i love u love u love u thank uuuu!!!!!!! <333 #gonna put this in my faves tag hehe #asks #💞

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letsfluxshitup · 4 years ago

Note

FLUX YOU MAD LAD YOU ACTUALLY DID IT!!! THE MARRIAGE CRACKFIC HYPE IS REAL AND THE REALITY DOES NOT DISAPPOINT!! i rly wanted 2 send u an ask as soon as I got the ao3 email but i held myself 2gether and actually read the current content like a Normal Person so!! This’ll be disjointed and incomprehensible but we’re both up at midnight right now so </3

Okay. Right. First of all: I love how comfortable ur writing is!! Like I know I’ve commented on it before but Techno n Quackity are just Very Comfortable with one another and there’s no stilted sort of ‘oh but it’s platonic’ clarification needed! They just genuinely feel safe in one anothers presence and that is wonderful <333

Also,, the description and use of the ‘mutually unrequited’ tag is ENDLESSLY amusing 2 me like yes,,, that’s so them,,, how did I not connect the dots before. Ur literally a genius

I love Mr. Quacks :]] his indignant protectiveness of Quackity that Big Q barely seems to notice? Him quickly registering Techno as a safe person bc of Quackity’s concern for him? Wilbur having issues with A Literal Chicken, Somehow? Mr. Quacks is my new favourite character in the Dream SMP sorry kings that really is how the cookie crumbles

I’m very satisfied by the fact that u let Quackity talk a little bit abt his issues with Schlatt!! And the way you write dialogue is so natural?? Like, Quackity doesn’t rly convey his specific issue super well bc he’s never been great at the whole feelings deal, but it’s super clear he’s trying to get across the emotional manipulation (even if Q doesn’t rly recognize it like that) and Schlatt’s obvious abuse of power over Quackity as his president AND husband. Very proud of him for his efforts :,] and Techno’s automatic response being to just go murder the man? Like YES KING LET’S FUCKING GOOOOOOOOO

I don��t know how you manage to do it but you make me more invested in their friendship w/ each thing you write :,]] Quackity’s very easygoing demeanour and active expression of affection through physical gestures and pet names pairs v well with Techno’s more stoic personality that gives way to casual shows of affection and fierce protectiveness of the people he cares about?? Your characterization is literally just a dopamine factory I will never get over how good you are at dynamics aasndmdkfkd

Also I love how ur including more SBI dynamics!! Your Wilbur is friendly but still like. Vaguely Unhinged and I appreciate that you didn’t completely get rid of his Issues(tm) in favour of the family dynamic. You woke up 2day and gave us both! As a treat. And I really love how you write Tommy as a whole :] he’s a bit of a brat and the teenage vibes are ever so present but you do kind of want to give him a hug anyways. I love and care them,,,,

You’ve sparked my thoughts abt your various quacknoblade AUs again!! And also dormant thoughts abt the TMA quacknobros AU I thought briefly abt where Techno was Jon n Quackity was Martin,,,,, honestly ur ability to create brainrot is insane ily king

- Saturn 🪐

OH SATURN I GENUINELY BLEW KISSES AT MY PHONE WHEN I REALIZED THIS WAS FROM YOU. you have such a distinct way of sending asks that I knew it was you right away actually it's really funny amksmdmdkdkd ilysm

Also WOW CALLED OUT YEAH ITS MIDNIGHT YEAH WE'RE FEELING INCOHERENT ❤️

ALSO THANK YOU;;; I channel my aromantic energy into my fics by just not registering things as romantic in the slightest ❤️ I am unstoppable ❤️

Ok wait it's kinda funny bc I feel like at a time I was like "gotta make sure everyone knows this is platonic" but now I've reached this point where I'm just "if you don't get it that's on you" KSKSKSKSKDKKDF

YES THE MUTUALLY UNREQUITED TAG;;; I saw a post abt it on Tumblr, I think I tagged it as #marriage crackfic bc that's literally what it is listen;;; it fits so fucking well oh my God

YEAH YEAH MR QUACKS IS SO IMPORTANT TO ME. I was a bit stuck on writing for a while and then iwnas like "wait what if quackity befriends that chicken from the creepcident" and now we're here skskmdmdmdmfk

ALSO YEAH WILBUR AND MR QUACKS S RELATIONSHIP IS V IMPORTANT TO ME

I'm really really glad you like the dialogue abt schlatt. Tbh I think that's like, one of the oldest parts of the fic. I've been writing it on and off for a while now and that was one of the first things I wrote, and I still absolutely adore how it came out. Idk! That bit of dialogue just came out fucking Perfectly for me and I'm still very :]]]]!!!! About it and I'm delighted you like it too!!!!

ALSO YES TECHNO MURDER POG <3

EVERYTIME YOU COMPLIMENT MY DYNAMICS I WEEP;;; I'm just very into characters who are Very Different getting along super well ok. im super duper in love with big stoic and chaotic small and that dynamic lives in my head rent free so you KNOW I gotta write about it as much as possible

YEAAAH THAT BIT WITH THE SBI BOYS WAS A JOY TO WRITE I REALLY REALLY LIKE IT A LOT;;; also yes! Wilbur gets to be unhinged <3 as a treat! AND YES FERAL TOMMY IS SO GOOD. HE IS A TEENAGER AND HE IS READY TO THROW HANDS CONSTANTLY. I imagine rough housing is a very popular way to show affection in the sbi household and tbh I'm a bit feral as well. projecting on to tommy by making him wrestle with techno. KAKAKKSKDKDKF

Ilysm your asks are always such a treat to read I'm very :>>> rn!!!

Also idk anything about TMA but I am looking intently!!! Share your infinite wisdom!!!

#saturn anon #<3

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teddystrap · 5 years ago

Audio

Drama CD: [幽幻ロマンチカ・破天荒] 第弐の謎獏ウタシロ

First post of 2020!!!! Happy New Year, and a special treat for all my lovelies - here is a bonus audio track from Yuugen Romantica's Utashiro (cv. Kimura Ryouhei). Remember, whenever you are feeling sad or down, he is always by your side. Just call out to him in your dream and he will be here...

This time the subtitle is hatenkou, which refers to a major feat that has never been accomplished before. The common theme seems to be that your demon boyfriend goes back in time to rewrite a tragic past event into a happier one using his magical powers and the strength of your love.

Oh wow, looks like I just spoiled the whole story? End of review. Bye bye (*^-^)/

...

(No srsly let's get started.)

This disc starts with three glass explosions [[#VOLUMEWARNING]] to make sure I was listening I guess... #RIPeardrums... ;_;

Anyway, you have a nightmare that you are in a creepy dark room. The ceiling is lined with needles and coming down on you, and Utashiro tells you that you have to escape before the candle burns out. He counts down to zero seconds and the ceiling collapses with a BANG,... but he tells you that the game is not over. It will just infinite-loop back to the beginning, until you are able to escape...

You wake up drenched in sweat, in your own bed/room with U-kun sleeping beside you. He comforts you and figures you must be nervous about the school camping trip tomorrow.

Next morning, ya'll head off on the trip. He disguises himself as a student and comes along to protect you, ofc. He's complaining about everything from the choice of location (deep in the woods), to the amount of food+cooking materials ya'll have to carry, blah blah. Better shut him up by sticking my tongue down his throat ;)

Apparently there's the rumours of the Seven Supernaturals nearby. He wonders whether to *make those rumours a reality* and scare the shit out of your classmates. This prompts you to throw food (and utensils?) at him, so he possesses you and touches you in a few non-erotic places, and you totally freeze and blush because apparently you are some kind of virginal Victorian maiden whose momma never told you how babies are made. Orz

At night you go to the bathroom and find him waiting outside for you. Turns out he has been sensing some *demonic energy* in this place. He possesses your body and rushes you back to the bungalow for some sexy fun times.

Back in the room, the girls are excited and stay up chatting late into the night. They ask you what you like most about your boyfriend, and to U-kun's horror, you happily tell them about the time he waited for you at the station with an umbrella when it was raining :3. He's sooo mortally embarrassed that he puts everyone to sleep with his demon powers. #useful #powersIwishIhad

With everyone down, however, you can't sleep because of the nightmare from last night. You tell U-kun about it, but he doesn't sense any 'nightmare vibes' from your dream. He thinks it's either: (1) a premonition, or (2) someone hacking into your dream with their evil plan. Then he changes into chibi form to comfort you, and ya'll fall asleep...

...And enter the 'nightmare'. The setting is an old house. There's Japanese dolls rolling around, paper amulets and blood bags lining the walls. U-kun still doesn't feel any 'nightmarish vibes' from it, and he tries to get you both out of there with his demon powers but guess what - IT'S NOT WORKING!! Dozen of lit candles appear, and bloody writing on the wall says: 「ここから出られるかな」 ('Can you get out of here?')

U-kun is all like: 'CHALLENGE ACCEPTED >:)' and yells at the dream-maker to leave you alone. Suddenly, the candles blow out. A timer starts, and you notice that the ceiling - which is gradually lowering - is lined with needles. U-kun tries and fails to blast through the locked door, and, panicking, he finally blows up the ceiling just in time. The two of you narrowly escape, by hiding in a corner where the fallen needles cannot reached.

You wake up in the bungalow, and U-kun notices that your hand has been scraped by the needles from the dream (i.e. if you had died in the dream, you would have died for real). U-kun kisses you wound and apologises for not being able to protect you with his powers. Then he tells you to keep awake for the next few hours, to avoid any bad 'after-effects' of the dream.

In the daytime, your class go hiking, and the two of you drop rank and stumble upon an open space in the woods. U-kun *generously* offers his knees for you to lay your head and make up your sleep from last night. Awwww~~~ (dies from kyun).

As you fall asleep, he kisses your lips to taste what kind of dream you are having. Just then, he senses a strong demonic force nearby...

That night, the two of you once again enter the recurrent 'nightmare'. U-kun asks the dream-maker why it's doing this to you, and the bloody writing on the wall appears again: 「ここから出られるかな」 ...Ya'll start running, but find that every room in the house is the exact same. Cloth appears and tie up both your bodies, and U-kun cuts them off with his powers, causing everything to return to peace and quiet.

U-kun immediately possesses your body to comfort you. He remembers back when the entire baku race died before his eyes, and vows to protect his loved ones and never let that happen again. Just then, he senses some uncertainty coming from the dream-maker, as you have remained unafraid despite repeated threats. Insert *inspirational speech* about how you are a fearless #sassygirl and u gonna get to the bottom of dis shit.

...You wake up back in the bungalow. U-kun is wondering if you have successfully escaped, and if your next 'nightmare' will be fatal, when he notices that you are actually holding a f-ing candle from the 'dream'. It's impossible to take objects out of a dream, which means that... OMG that is no f-ing dream!!! The horror house exists in reality. Dun-dun-DUN.

The two of you trek back to the open space from the previous day. There is an info sign that you missed before, of a hospital that was torn down around 100 years ago. The lingering spirits from this place must be kidnapping people in the dead of night and making it look like a 'nightmare'.

Over a century ago, a natural disaster caused many people to be admitted to this hospital. However, the treatment did not seem to be working, and their moans of pain could be heard every night. After the hospital was demolished, word spread of people living nearby being trapped in nightmares of this hospital: the rumours of the 'Escape Game', one of the Seven Wonders.

So, the mystery is finally revealed. The 'nightmare' is the work of the demon which has been spawned by the pain and anguish of the patients of this hospital. Demons are formed from the strong emotions of people, and this demon takes the shape of the hospital building.

To stop the threat to any more innocent lives, U-kun decides to destroy this demon... by himself. He reveals that he has felt known from the beginning that a love between a baku and a human would experience untraversable obstacles, and he would undertake all the pain to give you happiness.

*Of course* you could never be happy if anything happened to him, so you insist to tag along. He warns that he could be wrong and you might both die. But your reply gives him strength, he thanks you and apologises for trying to be the lone hero. And with that, you are off into the belly of the shark--!!!

Once again, you land in the horror house after falling asleep. U-kun announces to the demon that he knows its true form - that the knife attacks were actually surgical knives, the needles were for injection, and the cloths were bandages. His correct predictions send the demon into a state of panic once again. It sends out more surgical knives, which U-kun shields you from.

Turns out, the bloody writing on the wall is not an escape challenge, but rather an honest question: 「ここから出られるかな」 ('Can WE get out of here?'). The demon is not an embodiment of pain and anguish, but rather born out of hope, continually searching for someone who can reassure the patients that they will recover and be discharged from this place.

In the climax, he tells the demon that it can cut the two of you with a gajillion medical instruments, but it will never break your spirits. That the demon can be saved, and that is why you are here: to save it.

...

You are transported back in time to when the hospital was still running: patients lying in their beds, their faces distorted from the frightening dreams they are having every night. U-kun decides to help them by eating all their nightmares - to restore their happiness in the midst of despair, just like you did for him when he thought he had lost it all.

After eating all the patients' nightmares, their fears become soothed, and the dream-demon can be laid to rest eternally. The two of you wake up back in the open space, and it looks exactly the same as before. U-kun asks you if he actually managed to change anything, and you tell him: regardless of whether he did, the most important thing is to have faith.

Soon, it will be dawn. Cherry blossoms fall like snow from the surrounding trees, as if the patients are waving goodbye.

[Epilogue] The legend of the 'Escape Room Game' has changed: When the casualties of the disaster were moaning in the hospital at night, a baku came and saved them from their nightmares and soothed their fears. But whether all of them recovered and made it out of the hospital is anyone's guess.

At the end, U-kun thanks you for wishing for his happiness, and he now believes that he can find happiness too - together with you, of course!! *KISS*

#otome #drama cd #rejet #yuugen romantica #yuroma #youkai #baku #utashiro #seiyuu #kimura ryohei #hatenkou #alternate history #nightmare #high school #joshikousei

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butterflydm · 5 years ago

Text

links for current & recent media

Since I am watching and posting about these shows and will be doing so in the future, I did want to post the links to the places I’ve been watching at, since as an international fan, watching from the official links is generally the most I can do to support the shows. If you want any kind of personalized content warnings for the ones I’ve already watched, let me know!

Most of these are based on novels, none of which I’ve read yet, unfortunately. I have read a very little of a translation of Mo Dao Zu Shi (the novel The Untamed is based on) but my brainspace has been better situated to watching things than reading things at the moment.

Currently Watching

Until We Meet Again (by Studio Wabi Sabi)

I’m all caught up at episode 16 and am dying. Pls send help.

UWMA is a great show -- it’s a queer reincarnation romance, and it does have MAJOR content warnings for suicide and homophobia, but (imo) it deals with those topics very well. In addition to the romances, it has some great friendships as well. Wonderful acting.

I have two quibbles with the show, one more major (the somewhat erratic narrative flow for the side couple) and one that’s just a line here or there (cw: body-shaming, basically), but the main plotline is just... deep and nuanced and the acting in mind-blowingly good. 💖

Why R U? (by LINE TV)

Tonally, this show reminds me of something like The Princess Bride or Galaxy Quest or Clue, in that it feels like a loving and sincere satire of the genre’s conventions that can be funny and silly but then also have genuinely touching emotional beats. It’s laughing with the genre, not at it, I would say.

Saifon & Zon are kinda the more comedic version of the tropes, while Fighter and Tutor are the more drama-based half, but they switch it up sometimes. The tension between Fighter and Tutor is excellent, even if the subtitles are... sometimes less than clear. Watch their faces and their bodies and not the words on the bottom of the screen, tbh (though the most recent week’s subs were better; I heard they got a new translation team?). 💖

Recently Watched

TharnType (by LINE TV)

Special Episode (costs $10 to purchase unlimited streaming; the main series above is free):

I was genuinely blown away by TharnType. It can feel very raw and unfiltered, but in a way that is acted and filmed beautifully. Character growth that is... intense but believable. Complex characters.

It does have some pretty major content warnings but if you’ve watched Black Sails or Spartacus, then it’s in that same kind of ballpark, warning-wise, I would say but again, I can definitely give details if you need them.

The chemistry between the two lead actors is scorchingly hot; it kinda has to be for the story to work, but they have more than enough electricity to pull it off.

The story fits together really well. It’s a relatively straight-forward romance when you break it down, but I find it particularly satisfying how Type and Tharn’s faults move their relationship forward as much as their virtues do. Their relationship starts out so incredibly messy, which is always a favorite thing of mine.

Very much looking forward to season 2 when it airs. 💖

The Untamed | Chen Qing Ling (by Tencent): you can watch it on netflix, or youtube, or viki.com (@three--rings has informed me that viki is official too 💖)

I mean, this show is everywhere right now, but just in case you missed the pitch: charming and chaotic bisexual necromancer demonic cultivator dies but then is brought back and reunites with the love of his life while solving a murder mystery in ancient fantasy China.

It’s about as queer as it could possibly be given Chinese government censorship laws; the acting for the mains is fantastic, the chemistry between the leads is wonderful, it’s PEAK ROMANCE at all times, it has interesting and complicated things to say about family and society. It will give you all the feels. It helped heal my heart so much after the disappointment of The Magicians S4 finale. Infinite gratitude and love for it tbh. 💖💖💖

Planning To Watch Next:

1. Love By Chance: I’ve seen a bit of it already, because I wanted more Type content (and, yes, not the same actor, but it was definitely still Type!), but I haven’t watched it in full yet, so I’m going to officially watch it all after I’m done with UWMA.

2. Joy of Life: not a queer show or a BL but it sounds really intriguing (and Xiao Zhan from CQL has a minor part in some of the ending episodes). Modern-day student is reborn as a baby in ancient fantasy China; it apparently has a lot of humor but also has heart.

3. 3 Will Be Free: I hear this has a poly relationship as the main relationship and they get a happy ending plus the actual story (surviving while on the run from one of the character’s criminal family) sounds intriguing.

4. He’s Coming To Me: Ghost love story with a happy ending. No playlist links available that I’m aware of, but lmk if it sounds interesting to you.

5. HIStory: Cross the Line & HIStory 3: Trapped: I don’t actually know what these are about! I think History is a bit of an anthology show, where each ‘season’ has a different plot? That’s the impression that I get. These are both on viki.com so that’s where I’ll be watching them.

6. Dark Blue Kiss: I think this is about an established relationship (and there’s a compliation video called Our Skyy that has the actual ’getting together’ bit & I should watch that first).

#bl meta post #until we meet again #uwma the series #tharntype the series #the untamed | chen qing ling #why r u the series #long post #text post with links #i tried to use official links for any series where i could find them #if anyone has recs for any wlw shows #pls lmk!#this is very dude-heavy lol

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blccdlvne · 5 years ago

Text

hey u absolute BABES i am UNPREPARED hah but i’m trying my best sdjfdkfk big sad face... anyway im saoirse (she/her, est) and id love to plot with all of you and ur babies , either through tumblr ims or d*scord im @ jiminie e-girl#2013 uh yah heres a shitty intro and also a link to his PINTEREST okay bye ily

𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 here and do i have the tea for you . romeo is back on campus , which is surprising considering the threatening note i left them . yes , i know all about how he was to blame for the car accident that killed his brother because of their gluttony . imagine the tabloids and how the choi family would feel for such information to come out , not to mention the reputation of gamma because of their actions . at this rate , he is better off staying put in brooklyn , new york and living off that $924m family net worth . what’s the point in studying music production with plans to make music for the biggest names in the industry , is it worth it with what i know ? anyways , they may want to continue to be ardent & affable because the impetuous & volatile attributes make me want to spill . ( park jimin , saoirse , est ) .

my tropey spoiled lil rich boy who is just… chef’s kiss…. so disgusting (see: a mixture of chuck bass and joey tribbiani. h8 me for it.)

his father: owner of multi-million dollar hotel conglomerate. his mother: a well known defense attorney- they met when she almost sent him to jail uwu enemies to lovers uwu not that that matters besides the fact that, despite being married for almost 25 years now, its been a marriage of non stop pettiness, passive aggressiveness and arguing, as romeo and his 3 siblings have been privy too and are now all equally argumentative and volatile, romeo especially. :/

romeo is the second oldest of the choi kids, all of whom are at their core very similar, but beyond that very different; romeo is the Messy one. he grew up the favourite, his father seeing the most of himself in him as a loud, messy haired, muddy boy and brought him up as such;

his father decided that romeo would be the one who inevitably took over his business and bring the family pride; teaching his son all he thought he should know. it wasn’t until romeo was well into his volatile teen years that he’d realized his mistake, that it should’ve been romeo’s brother or sisters, all of whom then looked infinitely more promising than this boy who had been bailed out of jail by his own father too many times for a seventeen year old and had been kicked off the football team for getting in a fist fight with the team captain.

so romeo , with all his fathers’ refusal to bow to authority and anger and high head and love of expensive silk and jewels was suddenly aimless, after being told for all of his life that he didn’t need to worry about making decisions about his future because it had all been planned out for him.

so after graduating high school (a year late because not even his fathers’ bribes and threats could save his abysmal academic standing), he became a layabout, leaving the house to party and showing up at a gross hour of the morning, sleeping all day so he could do it again the next night.

regarding his secret; the night his brother died romeo had been out partying, being reckless and got stranded without his car and with a nearly dead cell phone, so he used his last 2% of charge to call his older brother, the new favourite, to have him pick him up (not the first time this had happened), and you can imagine what happened next- whether you’d consider the crash to be entirely romeo’s fault or not, he’s still dealing with that guilt, and his father knew how dangerous that information could be if the tabloids got a hold of it, so as far as the public was concerned romeo was with his parents that night, and his older brother had been alone in the car. romeo’s father even went to far to send him out of country briefly to deal with the minor injuries so no one could question them

basically his parents got sick of it, told him to find a job or let them ship him off to university SO HERE HE IS but he didnt wanna go into business or law or smthing that would make them PROUD (YUCK!) so instead he went and began to study his actual passion uwuwu

but yes, music is absolutely his truest passion, kind of always has been, wanted to learn how to play violin and guitar and piano as a kid, which his dad fought against, but his mom convinced him, thinking it might do good in the long run. romeo loves the idea of being a music producer, making tracks for really talented people and doing what he really loves

so now he’s here, guarded personality and decked out in the expensive fits he fell in love with- he likes the idea of being seen as the spoiled rich boy tho!!! bc it leaves NO room for people to know that hes actually a softie with very intense feelings and loves holding hands and cuddling and being the big spoon!!!! haha yeet? :(

i would write more but im already late to this party and i just wanna plot ok pls i love u all

#holling:intro #◆ ⋆ — shut! me! up!┊❛ ooc ❜ ❫#i accidentally kept switching my keyboard to french while writing this im tired #tw: death mention

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greensconnor · 5 years ago

Note

i’m asking about your dragon age characters

molly i would KILL for u im ur personal hitman now

anyway i said my city now because the entire bioware writing team sucks shit xoxo and i’m so much smarter than all of them but also fully incapable of having a normal amount of ocs for anything (see: the time i made 20 rwby ocs in less than two weeks) so i have. five worldstates here r some assorted thoughts

uhhh so the worldstates r as follows

eira mahariel (two-handed berserk/champ spec), rhett hawke (two-handed berserk spec), alas lavellan (mage knight enchanter spec), romanced alistair/fenris/dorian respectively

shiv tabris (dual wield duelist/assassin spec), radella “rads” hawke (mage spirit healer spec), kat adaar (two-handed reaver spec), romanced morrigan/isabela/cassandra respectively because im a pc gamer and i think i should be able to date whatever video game woman i like because im infinitely better than cishet men

this world state said yeah i respect mens rights. mens rights to shut the fuck up

twins bronson (sword/shield reaver spec) & bryant cousland (archer ranger spec), carmine hawke (archer assassin spec), syracuse trevelyan (dual wield tempest spec), romanced zevran/anora/josephine/bull. if ur wondering how that works my city now and the warden, hawke and the inquisitor should all meet and so they do because i Said So

riva amell (mage arcane warrior/battlemage spec), graham “gray” hawke (mage force spec), hellathen “hela” lavellan (archer assassin spec); romanced cullen/anders and later blackwall because hawke only likes men who will break his heart. hela doesn’t have a romance because she’s literally 20. who let her lead the inquisition (me it was me). also it should be noted the version of cullen i have in my head only vaguely resembles actual cullen because i write better than dragon age writers ever could and i gave him an Actual Cohesive Narrative and he gets bullied relentlessly for being scrawnier than his mage boyfriend

malien “mal” surana (mage spirit healer/keeper spec), jules hawke (sword/shield reaver spec), ash adaar (mage rift spec), romanced leliana/merrill/krem because i should have been able to kiss krem and its a Crime that i am not allowed to

knight enchanter is a Very op specialization and by Very op i mean it makes a mage with their built-in low constitution stats able to solo the biggest baddest dragon in the game on nightmare mode in under five minutes so like. alas lavellan fist fights dragons for fun send tweet

i think lavellans should be able to hit ppl with bricks for all the shit they endure. thus solas gets pranked by mahariel and alas by which i mean they just tip buckets of water onto him from the rookery

kat might be my only competent inquisitor but she did also try to knock out the right hand of the divine and attempt to gap even tho there’s fucky magic burning up her hand so does she have a brain cell? you decide

also its fantasy land and i do what i want so kat has blue/gold sectoral heterochromia

gray “mage rights” hawke is best friends with fenris which surprises literally everyone. their friendship started because they got into a fist fight and then they were like okay i respect u now. hawke is like hey fenris give me ur sword i have a fun trick to show u [uses his sword as a foci to zap carver in the ass with lightning]

i am Always thinking abt like how cullen could have been one man anti-chantry propaganda machine if he hadn’t so blatantly been shoehorned into every game past origins so anyway bioware forgot about a wholeass moon i can write what i like. [holds up cullen by the scruff of his stupid armor] not only are you bisexual you are also a bottom

i also Hate the whole uwu mage haters get fixed by romancing a mage

unlocked secret dialogue option where my inquisitors verbally cuss out dorian’s dad instead of whatever sympathetic narrative the writers were going for cuz its bullshit.

riva is a showoff and a Menace about being as good as he is because he unabashedly loves being a mage and hes like oooh look at me im sexy i dont need to use my hands to cast magic because i’m just that good ;)) and you know what. hes right.

gray, on the other hand, does Not want to be mage. he wants to be a druffalo farmer and retire in the hinterlands and be left the fuck alone. unfortunately he is gay and has one brain cell and terrible, terrible taste in men. ribbed relentlessly for this by riva (altho does he have room to talk hes been hung up on cullen since he was like 13)

shiv is trans n kieran is the result of doing the dark ritual with her wife and he looks a Lot like shiv (dark skin pointed ears, shock-white hair) and morrigan always just Assumed she dyed it or did something magic with it so seeing their kid come out like that was a WEIRD time for her

leliana almost Murdered by cassandra in worldstate 5 because the warden is Actually There The Whole Time, but its been 10 years, mal’s cut off all her hair and gotten full facial tattoos and she’s like “no one will know its me its fine” and she’s right. she gets away with it. only cullen like, Knows, because he knew her before the blight but he doesnt have a death wish n he like. will Not piss her off

shes dalish by birth n she was stolen from her clan by templars and thus is vehemently anti-circle and anti-chantry in general

uhhh the vallaslin (elf face tattoos) of my 4 dalish characters are:

eira = ghilan’nain (chose em cuz shes rlly interested in the navigation aspect of the goddess)

alas = falon’din (god of the dead n he picked them because he’s Also the god of fortune and alas is like tee hee fun but also he can and will kill u if u fuck with him so yk its fitting)

hela = june (god of the craft bc she likes to Make things but june is also the god who taught the elves 2 hunt and hela is. a hunter.)

mal = elgar’nan (allfather/god of vengeance bc. she is Vengeful. she is Angry. but yk fucking with shem politics and fucking their divine is like. mal may have little a retribution. as a treat.) yes she has the full half-face solid colour tattoo she does NOT fuck around.

bronson and bryant r not genetically identical but they Look similar enough 2 anyone who doesn’t know them well enough 2 play spot the distance. anora and bronson think this is a super fun game to play, especially when nobles realize they’ve swapped out the king but they’re too nervous to say anything

eira mahariel has two hands. one is for holding hands with alistair and the other is for throttling elven gods, apparently. she’s killed one before so solas she’s coming for your bitch ass next. watch urself.

speaking of eira and alistair are married thru dalish tradition and humans don’t recognize it n alistair loves 2 re-propose to her with random things. he’ll just pick up like. a bit of cheese and be like “marry me ;)” and she’s like GASP but whatever will the chantry say!!!! all of their friends r sick of them

“vhenan if you love me bring me a sword” “you think i could do better than a sword made out of space rock?” “:)”

eira is my youngest hero at 18 at the start of her game and kat is my oldest at 32 at the start of her game.

none of my hawkes are under six foot. rhett is the tallest (6′8″) and rads is the shortest (6′2″).

syracuse trevelyan would have been the Perfect inquisitor if he were not a pretty boy himbo and a gay bastard who does Most Things just to spite his parents.

[corypheus pointing at syracuse’s visage in his crystal orb thingo] i want that twink obliterated

i love the companions from older games return thing i truly do so i make it a point for Every companion to return in inquisition so the gang rlly is all here because i am a Slutte for found family

i lie in my keep worldstates because i dont want to choose between hawke and alistair during here lies the abyss but i never make him king and every time i play inquisition and cole has the wicked grace line it makes me Scream. alistair baby im so sorry i did this to you but i didnt actually do this to you

yes this is my everyone lives au but like. all the time. i have never left hawke in the fade and i do not intend to.

fuck whatever nonsense about wardens not being able 2 have kids. by sheer divine power (me) anora and bryant have three daughters; eleanor, sabina & cecelia n both bronson and zevran make Excellent uncles because i think anora deserves good things because i’m tired of bioware being like women bad, actually,

so like most of the time i have the warden & hawke turning up after the move to skyhold n then staying on, with the exception of bryant, carmine & mal. mal is as mentioned previously just There the whole time with her girlfriend. bryant steps in as king of ferelden w/ interests in closing the big hole in the sky spewing demons in2 his kingdom yk. carmine shows up because she wants to help & she wants protection for bethany but she outright says she’d rather die than be inquisitor so cassandra is shit out of luck.

“CHANGE HER MIND VARRIC” “she once doubled down on insisting amaranth was a shade of blue because she didn’t want to admit to being wrong. no one’s changing her mind seeker”

alas is the middle child of eight and is thus very good with children and also bossing around people older than him. 2 of his older siblings come to the inquisition when stuff in wycome has been settled

i left ash with the basic canon background with Some variation (he grew up under the qun and left of his own free will when his magic was discovered n he realized he couldn’t take living as a saarebas

kat on the other hand was raised tal-vashoth and has bounced around basically all over thedas and leads her own merc company when the conclave blows up. she also speaks multiple languages. is there a language she doesn’t speak? probably not

just realized how long this got so im gonna like. stop my general rambling now but lmao yeah theres some basics. waves hands.

#sol.txt #sol.orig #long post #late night followers im SO sorry for this #but also like.#i love them so yall just have 2 cope w/ it #no thoughts head dragon age #peonydarling

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garoujo · 2 years ago

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merry christmas if you celebrate emmie! you’re the greatest gift anyone could ask for🤧🥰

nagi is a lucky LUCKY man ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ

sending lots of love cuddles and kisses

╰(*´︶`*)╯♡

-🐙

merry christmas bbie !!! sobbing cause i think yew are my greatest gift ໒꒰⑅ㅠ·ㅠ⑅꒱১ UR SO CUTE !!! i am sending this 2 nagi as we speak tho grrrrrr .. sending u soooo many loves & cuddles always [u deserve an infinite supply] <3

#ʚ ₊˚ 💬 — new emmail.#ʚ ₊˚ ⌕ — 🐙 nonnie #U ARE A SWEETHEART I SWEAR <3 #i hope you’re taking care of urself this holiday szn bbie & i hope you’ve had the best weekend !!! >_<

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deadcactuswalking · 3 years ago

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REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 09/07/2022

Welp, they’ve done it. LF SYSTEM have knocked Kate Bush off of the top spot of the UK Singles Chart as “Afraid to Feel” spends its first week of hopefully more on the #1 spot. It’s a damn good song, and I’ll admit that some of the novelty of “Running Up That Hill (A Deal with God)” has somewhat faded. Speaking of somewhat faded – make of that what you will – welcome back to REVIEWING THE CHARTS!

Rundown

As always, we start with our notable dropouts – songs exiting the UK Top 75, which is what I cover, after five weeks in the region or a peak in the top 40 – and of course, since it’s a quiet – yet weird – week, there’s just a few. Apart from the debuts from last week flailing, it’s mostly songs that never truly got off of their feet properly leaving kind of prematurely, those being “Baba (Toma Tussi)” by Russ Millions, “1989” by Aitch and “N95” by Kendrick Lamar, as well as “good 4 u” by Olivia Rodrigo finally leaving.

Of course, what is always infinitely more interesting? Our notable gains and returning entries, of course! In terms of the latter, we just have “One Kiss” by Calvin Harris and Dua Lipa back at #74 and Paolo Nutini getting a boost off of his #1 album as “Through the Echoes” returns to #46. When it comes to our gains, we see boosts for “Ferrari” by James Hype and Miggy Dela Rosa at #63, “Sunroof” by Nicky Youre and dazy at #60, “No Excuses” by Bru-C at #28, “Vegas” by Doja Cat at #27, “Last Last” by Burna Boy at #12 which will likely peak even higher next week with the album, and finally, “21 Reasons” by Nathan Dawe and Ella Henderson enters the top 10 at #10.

The top five this week consists of – from bottom to top – “Green Green Grass” by George Ezra at #5, “BREAK MY SOUL” by Beyoncé at #4, the aforementioned “Running Up That Hill” at #3, “As it Was” by Harry Styles at #2 and of course, “Afraid to Feel” at #1. Now this may seem like a bit of a cop-out since I did this last week but this week for me has been pretty busy, kind of discombobulated, so I’m going to push back Off the Charts again, especially since there are only a few releases I’d add on from this week. That does mean that next week I’ll have enough non-charting albums to fill up a stocking but I’ll have the time and energy to write all of that up and gather more final thoughts, making it a bit more palatable for me overall. Trust me: some of these albums are really interesting and really damn good so I want some more time with them. As that’s the case, I guess we can get straight into our strange bunch of new arrivals.

NEW ARRIVALS

#75 – “Wet Dream” – Wet Leg

Produced by Dan Carey

Well, I did warn you it was weird. We start with a song about wet dreams – thankfully not about Charli XCX as Black Country, New Road would gladly put out (more on her later) – but simply about this creepy guy who was an ex of Rhian Teasdale of British rock duo Wet Leg, sending messages about his wet dreams to her post-breakup. As you’d expect, the song isn’t as scathing as it is pure mockery at the pathetic nature of this, with the vaguely post-punk landfill indie production, coarse guitars coasting under oddly flat-feeling drums making this seem like an upbeat, lighthearted track. The verses, whilst mocking, imply a perverse, sarcastic infatuation with the kind of creepy behaviour he exemplifies, and even invite him to come to her place and watch a film, but the chorus does feel a bit irrelevant with its cute, catchy catchphrases that end up making the song feel more anthemic than a song about a creepy ex’s clingy and disgusting behaviour should probably feel. I like it more than “Chaise Longue” but I’m still not that compelled to check out more from the group, especially if the instrumentation continues to be this uninteresting and predictable. Typically, this’d be the token rock song of this episode, but we actually have more to come, as we continue with...

#71 – “Getting Started” – Sam Fender

Produced by Bramwell Bronte

Even though I’ve liked pretty much every single that has charted from Sam Fender’s Seventeen Going Under, I’ve yet to check out the album in full – but it’s not like it matters as Fender is happily pushing more singles, with this being a pretty obvious pick given its jangling acoustics and 80s pop rock groove held together by the spritzy strumming and more soaring licks in the back of the mix. It may be too obvious a pick however, as the chorus is full of empty platitudes and “motivational” slogans that come off as kind of generic and detached, especially with the richly-voiced genuine sarcasm that just naturally drips from Fender’s delivery. The vocal mixing doesn’t exactly help matters, as I wish it embraced some of the anthemic enveloping guitars a bit more, but I do love the verses with their details surrounding Fender as a young man and his frustration with finding escapism in a social class and situation that won’t let the dream of being a young British lad getting out and having drinks really come to fruition, especially when you have familial responsibilities that come with the co-operation in a working class family, that just isn’t present for other people. His frustrations are especially true with the North where he grew up, and I like how the song tampers off rather than coming to a screeching halt: he’ll probably never live up to those escapist ideals and still be “grinding” as he says, so it makes sense for it to trail off as his ambition does the same thing, eventually curtailing itself into becoming routine. Despite the gripes I have with the chorus and really the instrumentation not being that unique, it’s still a well-written and structured song that I can appreciate. I doubt it’ll stick around but I kind of hope it does.

#70 – “MORE” – j-hope

Produced by Brasstracks

Naturally, with the BTS hiatus, we’ll get more and more solo work appearing on and off the charts, which means my work to learn each of their names has actually paid off. Jungkook and SUGA have both appeared, so now it’s j-hope’s turn with his lead single that I... really do not like. Now, before I am set to die like Jesus on the cross, it’s mostly not j-hope’s fault as I think this dated production and its weird, buzzy, clunky groove is way too dark and scuffed for this kind of borderline nonsensical flex song, wherein j-hope is clearly trying to have more fun than this instrumental is letting him. I do appreciate the experimentation here, as it’s a damn weird song, especially with the drop into punk guitar riffs and compressed screaming that replaces the chorus. He’s screaming pretty much gibberish but if the guitar tones weren’t so rote, I’d kinda be into the chorus, which does feel like it’s emulating alternative dance. The lyrics are in Korean for the verses and English elsewhere, but what is in English isn’t worth much discussion and what’s in Korean seems pretty serviceable albeit underwritten, so the focus really is on that instrumental switch for the chorus that doesn’t really have any pay off. Nothing is built up at this point, it just chugs along until it chugs along at another point with a vaguely obnoxious, grandiose guitar lick. This is much of the problem I have with a lot of K-pop, and I understand that it can be the appeal but it does lead to songs like that just feel... broken. There’s some promise here, sure, but it’s squandered with a level of effort put into the squandering that makes it almost seem like squandering was the intention in the first place.

#67 – “Big City Life” – Luude and Mattafix

Produced by Luude, Saul Milton and Will Kennard

It doesn’t really get any weirder, either. Okay, so first of all, some context: Mattafix are one of those post-Britpop and post-trip hop genreless pop groups that took as much influence from pop and R&B as they did dusty electronic beats, the buzziest of which are present in their biggest hit, “Big City Life”, which peaked at #15 in 2005. Despite the then-modern production, it’s a very typical bluesy song about being in an overlooked area of a big city and therefore having the system ignore you if not go out of its way to punish you for where and to whom you were born. It’s a damn great song too, with the soulful vocals, poetic rapping and those escalating synths that seem to embellish the strife as the song goes on, strengthening the mantra of its fondly remembered hook, sang in Jamaican Patois. What’s arguably most important, however, is that the song topped the New Zealand charts and peaked at #19 in Australia, making it fair game for pop nostalgia down in Oceania. Naturally, Luude made this humble, downtempo blues track a drum and bass banger, and well, it makes more sense than it should. Luude retains the primitive-sounding synths from the original, making them cloudier and spacier as the vocals are drenched with different forms of reverb and echo. Whilst the original dug deep into the idea that everyone is just a statistic, the warped bass that reflects the lead vocal melody once the breakbeats come in, and that incomprehensible Vocaloid drop, make this version feel really alienated and isolating. Mattafix sound desperate as hell in that second verse as he hopes to share some time with a friend, and the chaos of the breakbeats in the chorus push all of that to the side. Given the current situation in the UK, I can see this really resonating with people and sticking around, and I hope it does too because it’s a great song with an excellent new remix. Please check this out if you haven’t already.

#59 – “Hot Sheep” – Cardi B featuring Kanye West and Lil Durk

Produced by Tay Keith and BanBwoi

Do not be alarmed: Cardi B is not Welsh. It’s just that this is a family show. Speaking of families, Cardi is back from having children with Offset to deliver a “comeback” single... that debuts at #59. This song does feel like it’s from 2018, given the Tay Keith beat that doesn’t even bother with his signature pianos for the most part, or at least they’re mixed way below the pounding 808s that go hard for as long as the song keeps its momentum (read: not that long), going for a pretty minimal beat that Cardi is able to ride on really effectively. The strings in the hook add some necessary variation and intensity, and Cardi brings much of the same, with the same uber-confident delivery, flexing and pop culture references we can come to exist, but with this new gimmick of having random vocal samples complete her bars which I think is fun. She does it twice here with both Pardison Fontaine and the “Electric Boogie” sample to complete the “Electric Slide” reference, and I hope there’s more of that on the album because it’s funny. Can you tell I’m stalling with positive aspects here? I really am trying to be nice here because a vast majority of the five plus people involved here are trying. I don’t get much from Cardi’s barely-a-chorus, but Lil Durk brings a great deal of energy and violence as he always does with the gang talk, going for a menacing delivery that ends up imitating Kanye by the end... which may as well have been a replacement for the man himself because he delivers a terrible verse here. It sounds like amateur hour in his verse, with filler bars stacked on top of filler bars, and things that he clearly said as a placeholder being left in because he couldn’t be bothered to replace them. Is Kanye threatening that he and Pusha will go and kill Pete Davidson? No, he left a filler bar in because it would get clicks, whilst barely staying on the beat, slipping over his own exhausted cadence and flow, which becomes incessantly whiny and repetitive in the mid-section. His woe-is-me brag raps have always been hit-and-miss, but he just comes off as smarmy here as he disrupts this flexing trap banger to complain about how he felt suicidal after losing Virgil Abloh... and immediately contrasting it with how he’ll splurge at the Louis Vuitton store, which would be a typical Kanye bar if he hadn’t already chanted that we’re not buying Louie bags after Virgil passed just this year. Just because he’s saying words – or at least Genius says so – doesn’t mean it’s anything of greater substance than reality TV drama I don’t want to see played out or references to his right-wing political grift exchange with Donald Trump. I get why the “mm-mm” flow worked in “Hurricane”, but it didn’t work in “Junya” and it sounds stiff as hell here, mostly because I know full well that this is just a leftover from his mumbling demo reference tracks, which he now realises fans will eat up like finished tracks anyway. The shadow of YANDHI will haunt the amount of true effort and care that the grifting “perfectionist” will put into his work, and the consideration of him as a public figure continuing during the divorce period has really dampened if not eroded much of the artistic goodwill I and many others had for Ye. Get help, man, and stay off of this otherwise pretty okay song.

#47 – “Master of Puppets” – Metallica

Produced by Flemming Rasmussen and Metallica

As if this episode couldn’t get any less comprehensible, here’s the debut of legendary heavy metal band and anti-Napster advocates Metallica’s classic eight-minute title track from their 1986 magnum opus charting for the first time thanks to an appearance in Stranger Things because underappreciated 80s cuts just use that show as a springboard for new hits nowadays. This trend is scary, even if ACR is vacuuming up some of those streams, mostly because the power of Netflix is largely unpredictable, but also because I’m not sure if the song itself is really charting or the phenomena behind it, so reviews of these songs may just catch up to that novelty factor than discussion of the music itself. In this case, I think I’m fully justified in doing so because what do I say about “Master of Puppets”? It’s not a particular gritty depiction of addiction, being more of a manic, camp one given the speed metal riffs and the echoed vocals from James Hetfield that have never sounded good to me, as the mixing does not make this sound all that grand at all, so it kind of just chugs along for that first section. I’ve never been a Metallica fan in the first place, largely because of how my appreciation of metal stops and ends at alt-metal, and I’ve never really understood the “kickass” energy that other people get from them. Most of the time, they sound desperate and showy, in a way that just can’t resonate with me given the faux heaviness of the material. This is far from a bad song, and the more progressive elements do save it: the breakdown is a pretty excellent touch with the soaring guitars, slight acoustics and the really technical solo representing the high that Hetfield feels and its subsequent comedown. The mix feels really enveloping and harsh with that pointed bass riff in the bridge that does kind of go hard, but when it goes back into the guitar wankery over unfittingly paced drumming I can’t take it seriously, especially not with Hetfield’s yammering. I just don’t think I’ll ever click with classic Metallica, and I honestly don’t really see this sticking around farther than the wearing off of the novelty, because there’s no real hook to this to latch onto... and that’s coming from someone who actually likes “St. Anger” a fair bit so what am I to know when it comes to metal? Regardless, it’ll be gone next week. You know what might not be?

#42 – “Hot in It” – Tiesto and Charli XCX

Produced by Goldfingers and Tiesto

Charli’s self-declared “sellout era” continues with this collaboration with legendary Dutch trance DJ Tiesto, who is having a bit of a resurgence himself in the slap-house era. This could have gone either way but I knew that it was going to extremely something, and well, I’ll be damned if it isn’t, even if it ends up as barely over two minutes. It’s got a somewhat farty synth, Charli obnoxiously dripping in Auto-Tune and so much vocal manipulation that sounds clumsy enough to still be relatively human over this garage house beat which, while typical, is pretty bouncy. The content is all about dismissal, specifically of relationship problems which there is some level of detail to, for the sake of going on the dancefloor and looking hot as a form of escapist confidence. There’s not much to say about the song at all because it really is as basic as possible, but Tiesto adds as much thematics as possible to dramatise the otherwise mundane track, like the breathing vocal loop being percussive in the final chorus alongside the extravagant layering of vocal tracks and synths, and the sole pre-chorus having some genuine complexity in how the muddy vocal pick-ups are layered and splattered around. It just works, and I can see it getting higher than this too. Charli has just that much more personality than Ava Max for me to get behind this, and it’s also that teensy bit catchier. Overall, it’s a surprisingly normal end to our bizarre week.

Conclusion

I mean, how do I conclude? I’ve always said that the bottom of the charts has typically been more peculiar than what reaches the top – even if in the UK’s case, damn near everything that charts is bonkers – but having to listen to eight-minute Metallica songs followed by Charli XCX club bangers is still about as diverse as I could have expected this chart to be. It’s also really not a bad week since most of this ranges from okay to pretty damn good, with Best of the Week going to Luude and Mettafix for “Big City Life” – genuinely excellent song – and Honourable Mention going to... “Hot in It” by Tiesto and Charli XCX, really. It works for me. In terms of our worst, I feel like I am going to have my private information shared and used to hunt me down because I am about to offend two fanbases capable of killing me: j-hope gets Worst of the Week for “MORE” and Metallica of all people get the Dishonourable Mention for the iconic yet in my opinion wasteful slog that is “Master of Puppets”. If I make it to next week, thank you for reading and I’ll see you then!

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