#seeing them in 3 weeks i'm rabid

[infizero]

like LOOK AT THEMMMMMM they make me fucking crazy theyre so shaped they go so well together im gonna bite someone.

[stevie-petey]

episode eight: the upside down

You know you shouldn’t, but you laugh. Honestly, after everything you’ve been through tonight with Steve, how can he possibly think the two of you aren’t friends? “Why are you laughing?” Steve mumbles, confused.  “Sorry,” you wheeze out, still uncontrollably laughing. “It’s just–I mean, dude! We almost died together, of course we’re friends now!” “We are?” He looks like a little kid on Christmas day being given the gift he’s always wanted. Your heart warms. “Yes, idiot.”

summary: drinking game time ! take a shot every time jonathan tries ditching you or every time you almost die at the byers house, you find out that steve really is an athlete and tbh it's hot, but you know what's even hotter ? saving hawkins and reaching a tentative compromise with steve after he loans you $5 for snacks. after, jonathan makes a promise you really hope he can keep.

rating: general, cursing and slight scary violence

warnings: violence, use of fire and weapons, guns, use of fem!reader and use of y/n, slight mentions of blood and death

words: 13.7k

before you swing in: the final chapter ,,, my heart </3 please enjoy my child, i put so much into this chapter. action scenes scare me, they're hard and i'm weak, so i hope this lives up to everything you guys wanted n more ;) i cannot believe we're at the end (but i do have another chapter planned that's set in season 1, so shhhh). thank you so so so much for all your support. i never thought this silly lil fic would get that much attention, but i'm insanely flattered and grateful for each and every one of y'all. i'm so proud of what i've created and you guys are my beloveds ,,, anyways, enjoy !!!

-

You almost miss Jonathan and Nancy sneaking off. 

You had been explaining a comic book that had been in your bag to El when you noticed a shift in your periphery. Turning your head, you see Jonathan stand, offer Nancy his hand to help her up, and then walk towards the main doors together. 

What the fuck. 

“They wouldn’t dare…” You excuse yourself and run out the gym and into the hallway to follow them, absolutely furious. You’re so sick of their bullshit, of Jonathan’s bullshit and putting Nancy first. This isn’t even a petty jealousy thing, this is about the years of friendship between the two of you that has just suddenly disappeared within a damn week all due to circumstances completely out of your control. 

The slam of the main door is the only warning Jonathan gets before you’re yanking him by his coat and flinging him back, forcing him to look at you. “Where the fuck do you think you’re going?”

You’ve never, ever yelled at him like this before. Not even earlier this week when he’d given you that bullshit apology after screaming at you for being in his room, for saying the two of you weren’t family. You didn’t yell at him for hiding Nancy’s pictures from you, for going off without you to find the monster. Despite everything, you’ve never been this cruel to him, even if he may have deserved it at times.

Jonathan’s wide eyes stare down at your hand that’s still clutched around his coat, frightened. “Bug, we were just–”

“Just what? Sneaking off without me?”

“It’s not like that, Y/N.” Nancy now steps in, her hands held up as if you’re some rabid dog she wants to calm down. “We just figured we’d help Joyce and Hopper.”

“‘We’? Are you fucking kidding me? You two talked about this, had an entire conversation, and still somehow came to the conclusion that ditching me was a great fucking idea?” You scoff, deeply hurt by the fact that the two of them had an entire conversation without thinking to include you in it. 

“Bug, can we talk about this one on one?” Jonathan asks, his voice lowered. You can see the genuine upset in his eyes and for a moment your grip on him lessens, but then you see Nancy behind him and your anger only returns. 

“No, we can discuss this right here.” 

He sighs and tries to grab the hand not clutching his coat, but you slap it away. “Bug–”

“You’ve lost that privilege.” 

“Bug–I mean, Y/N,” His voice falters. “Look, my mom and Hopper are out there right now trying to find Will while that monster is still out. Nance and I… We want to finish what we started.” 

“Without me?” You don’t mean for it to happen, but your voice catches at the end.

Jonathan’s gaze softens and this time he succeeds in grabbing your hand. You let go of him and allow him to pull you in, weak against him as always. “I’m doing this to protect them, to protect you, Y/N. I’m always trying to protect you. You know that, right?”

You used to think that you did, but now? You’re not so sure, and it terrifies you. 

Nancy has stepped away from the conversation, now kicking at rocks while you’re with Jonathan, and you can’t help but think about how wrong all of this feels. 

Throughout this entire week it’s felt like someone has given you a photo of Jonathan, smeared its lines and edges, removed his moles and his crooked smile and made it neater, altered so that if you squint you can see the boy you grew up with underneath it all… But it’s fuzzy, almost too unclear to really see. 

Now he’s standing in front of you, his smile once more crooked and cunning and his moles faded underneath the moonlight and for a second you can see him. There he is, clear and untouched and him in a way that’s never quite been yours.

���I know,” you tell him. “But how many more times do you expect me to forgive you for lying and ditching me? If you want to protect me, you need to talk to me.”

Jonathan winces. “I know, I know it sounds stupid and I know I’ve fucked up more than enough this week, I just get caught up in wanting to make sure you’re safe. It’d kill me if I let anything happen to you… I just, I can’t lose you, bug.”

“So pushing me away is your grand plan of keeping me?”

“I’ve always been an idiot.” He manages a smile, and you can’t help but laugh. 

“That’s true, but if you attempt to ditch me one more time I swear to god I’ll pour tar all over your car.”

The boy laughs and for a brief moment everything feels okay again, but it doesn’t last very long. “In our defense, we figured you’d be better off with the kids since you’re not really a fighter, ya know?” 

You drop his hand. “Excuse me?” 

Jonathan’s smile is gone. “What?”

“I’m not really a fighter? You’re kidding, right?”

“Hey, no I didn’t mean it like that–” Jonathan fumbles over his words, clearly taken aback by your sudden mood change. 

You step away from him. “How many times did I defend you against Lonnie? Better yet, remind me how we became friends in the first place. Wasn’t it because I threw milk at a bunch of idiots bullying you? Huh?”

“Y/N–”

“God, I can’t believe I almost let you get away with it again! I mean, do you even hear the bullshit that comes out of your mouth?” You deepen your voice, now doing a poor impersonation of him. “‘Hey, bug! You know I love you, right? Cool! Now, I’m gonna go do fuck all and ignore you and ditch you and then somehow turn it into me being a good guy because duh! I can never do any wrong!’”

“Please, just–”

“Did I get it right? It was a pretty good impersonation in my opinion. I mean, I am the one who has had to deal with this shit all fucking week. I think I'm an expert on this topic now.” 

Jonathan looks pained but you don’t fucking care anymore. You’ve reached your limit, you’re sick and tired of being treated like some delicate creature that’s incapable of taking care of itself. You literally slapped Tommy Hagan this afternoon in order to help Jonathan, yet here he is basically calling you weak. 

And yet Nancy is the fighter. She’s the one who gets to go along on the adventure while you’re sidelined because for some damn reason you’re always the second option. Never taking matters into your own hands, always the one left behind to clean up the mess and take care of those also discarded. 

You’re sick of it. 

You step closer to Jonathan again, so that you’re nose to nose, and whisper, “I’m tired of never being good enough.” 

And with that, you reach into his coat and snatch up his keys, a game you’ve always played with him but now has turned into a bitter taste in your mouth, and run back into the gym. Someone has to inform the kids of the plan, make sure they’ll be okay on their own. 

Dustin sees you approach and smiles, but when he notices the angry pace in your steps, he frowns. “Uh oh.”

“Yeah, uh oh.” 

“Jonathan again?”

You nod, still too angry to trust your words. “Yeah.” 

He notices the keys in your hand. “Where are you going?”

Mike and Lucas look over now, curious as to what’s happening. 

You sigh. “I’m going with Nancy and Jonathan to the Byers house, we’re going to kill the monster.” 

“Why the hell are you going?” Dustin exclaims while Mike shoutes “sick!” and Lucas mumbles “great, alone again”. El remains quiet, still resting. 

You flick your brother’s hat. “I have to, Dustin.”

“For Jonathan?” He shakes his head. “I like him, but aren’t you mad at him right now?”

“Is it just me, or is she always mad at him these days?” Mike whispers over to Lucas, who simply shrugs. 

“Girls, man.” 

You ignore them and focus on Dustin. “It doesn’t matter. He needs my help, and no one in the party gets left behind. Remember?”

“Y/N–”

“I love you,” you kiss the top of his head. “I promise I’ll be safe, just be careful, okay? I’m putting you in charge, so don’t let me down. If everything goes according to plan, I’ll see you in a few hours tops!”

Dustin tries to argue some more, but you quickly run back outside before he can get another word in. You feel horrible leaving him behind, but you know this is the right decision. If you can kill the monster, there’s less of a chance of the kids or Joyce and Hopper getting hurt. Jonathan and Nancy may be fine on their own, but there’s always power in numbers and they’ll need all the help they can get. 

You just… you have to help. You know this is what you’re supposed to be doing, even if it pains you to do so. Dustin and the kids are smart; as long as they stay at the school, they’ll be fine. 

In theory, that is.

Nancy and Jonathan are waiting for you outside. You push past them and march towards Jonathan’s care; they awkwardly follow after you. You unlock it, throw yourself into the backseat, and promptly dig through your backpack to make sure you have everything. 

The two teens get in a few minutes after you. Not one word is spoken as Jonathan starts the car and the three of you drive off, leaving Hawkins Middle behind. 

– 

You thought the car ride with Nancy and Jonathan from the funeral home had been tense, but this one? Downright painful. 

Jonathan has a tight grip on the steering wheel and keeps trying to catch your eye through the rearview mirror but you avoid his gaze. You’ve spent the last five minutes arranging and rearranging your backpack to give you something to do while Nancy has tried three times to make conversation to make this car ride bearable. 

“El seems nice.” 

“You said four words to her, Nancy.” You retort, switching open your switchblade once more to watch the moonlight dance off of its blades. 

“Right.” 

Nancy shifts uncomfortably in the passenger seat. You know she realizes she’s once again upset the balance in your relationship with Jonathan. It was only an hour ago that she tried getting you to admit your feelings for him before convincing the boy to up and leave you. Sure, Jonathan made his own decision in the end, but damn. She could’ve at least pretended to want you around. 

She notices your knives and tries to spark conversation again. “I love the color of the handle, it’s beautiful.” 

“Thanks,” you switch the blades closed and sit up in your seat. “Anyways, you geniuses have a plan or were you just counting on ditching me and winging it from there?”

“Y/N–”

“No, Nancy. I insist, let’s talk about a plan. We’re here to kill a monster, right?”

She closes her mouth and frowns, turning to Jonathan for help, but he’s no use. He’s busy tapping his fingers against the wheel and praying that the world will just swallow him up whole. Too bad for him you’re a stubborn pain in the ass and would simply pluck him back up so you can torture him some more. 

Nancy sighs. “Well, Jonathan and I were thinking we use the supplies we got earlier and lure the monster to his place, then we kill it.” 

“Awesome plan, guys!” You say, your voice dripping with sickly sweetness that leaves them both feeling even more uncomfortable. “But may I suggest some actual details or shall we just bank off of this wonderfully dull and vague plan?” 

“Sure, Y/N. Tell us what you had in mind.” Nancy rubs her face tiredly, knowing she deserves this. 

“Great! I’m assuming we’re luring the monster with blood?” They nod at you, so you continue. “Okay, so before we lure it I think we should completely booby-trap Jonathan’s house. Nail the bear trap down onto the floor, make sure the floor is cleared of anything that could trip us up. Then, once we’ve got the house secured, we knick ourselves to draw some blood and pray to whatever god is up there that we can kill the thing.” 

You pause for a moment, remembering how all the Christmas lights had been unscrewed by Joyce earlier. “The lights, we need to fix them. The monster communicates through the lights so if we have them, then we can track it.”

“That all sounds great, bug.” Jonathan finally speaks up, ass kissing. 

“Thanks, pal. Still don’t have the bug privilege back, but I’m sure you simply forgot.” 

He gulps, once more going back to being silent as he drives you and Nancy to his house. 

Nancy again tries to diffuse the tension. “How do we even kill the monster though? I mean, will my bullets be enough?”

“I have this idea, but it’s… well, it’s out there.” You bite your lip, now feeling your cocky demeanor slipping. “If we can safely set fire to it, I think that’s our best bet.”

“Fire?” Jonathan exclaims, but Nancy shushes him. 

“I think you’re right.” 

“Y/N, I know you’re mad at me but do we really have to set fire to my house–”

Now it’s your turn to shush Jonathan. “This isn’t about that. I wouldn’t burn your house down, I already told you I’d just pour tar on your car whenever I get the chance. For now, I really do think the best thing to do is burn the monster alive. In every horror movie and book, fire always gets the job done.” 

Despite herself, Nancy lets out a soft chuckle as Jonathan parks the car, now at his house. “She’s right, Jonathan. And who burns down houses these days? Tar really is the best form of revenge.” 

“I’m flattered, Wheeler. At the rate you’re going, you’ll be off my shitlist in no time.” You tell her, patting her on the shoulder before getting out of the car. You quickly open up the trunk and gather the monster hunting supplies while Jonathan and Nancy take their time getting out. 

You let yourself into the Byers home using your own key to the place. It’s been nestled in between the key to your house and the spare key to Jonathan’s car on your keychain for a few years now. 

The first thing you get started on are the lights. There’s hundreds of them to get through, but you drop your supplies and begin screwing them in one by one. Nancy and Jonathan come in soon after and silently begin to help. 

No conversation is made besides the necessary comments about the prep work. You’re all too focused on the possibility of what could happen next; the danger of the situation has finally set in. After the lights have all been fixed, you instruct Jonathan to begin nailing the bear trap down while you and Nancy discuss where to pour the gasoline. You both agree to make a path from the living room to Will’s room. 

As Nancy pours the gasoline, you follow behind her and pick up any flammables. You weren't lying to Jonathan earlier, you really don’t want to burn his house down. While the house is wrecked, it’s still a home despite everything that’s happened in it. You practically grew up within its walls, you’d do anything to keep it as protected as possible. 

When you’re done, you watch Nancy load her gun. A shiver runs down our spine; she looks at ease with it, which you figure should be reassuring, but the gravity of everything leaves you feeling on edge. You leave her alone and walk into the kitchen where Jonathan is, now hammering a ton of nails into his bat. 

You begin to sharpen your blades next to him, still finding that you only feel secure by his side. The rhythmic sound of his hammering calms you, in a sense. It serves as a distraction. You know you insisted on coming, you don’t regret it and you know you’re stronger than everyone seems to give you credit for, but you’re also terrified. This isn’t just some adventure in the woods; this could kill the ones you love dearly. 

Once you’re both done preparing your weapons, the two of you walk to Will’s room and rig up a simple snare. Jonathan grabs a yo-yo and you pull up a chair to set it on. The idea is that when the string gets pulled, it’ll alert you that the monster has sprung the bear trap. It’s not the most efficient warning system, but it’ll have to do. 

The last thing to do is set the bear trap, which takes all three of you to achieve. Jonathan and Nancy hold down the edges with their body weight and you very carefully set the trap with your hand. You shake a bit as you do so, but you force your nerves down. You remind yourself that Jonathan thinks you’re too weak, too cowardly, you have to prove him wrong. 

When the bear trap clicks into place, you let out a harsh exhale and sink against the wall, your heart still pounding. Jonathan and Nancy copy you and the three of you sit in silence. You’re still shaking a bit, and Jonathan is next to you just as tense, but for the first time since you’ve met him you can’t reach out to grab his hand to steady yourself. He’s too far, both literally and figuratively. Even with him next to you, you couldn’t be more far apart. 

In the back of your mind, you hope the kids are alright. Hopefully they’re having a better night than you currently are. 

“C’mon,” you say after a few minutes, getting up to walk over to the living room. “We’ve done all we can, now we just have to draw some blood and be the prettiest bait in Hawkins.”

�� 

Nancy and Jonathan decide to cut the palm of their hands, but you respectfully would rather die than have a matching scar with them. The idea makes you so uncomfortable you visibly cringe when Jonathan tells you the idea. “Yeah, no thanks. I think I’ll find somewhere else to cut.” 

He looks hurt by what you’ve said but doesn’t voice it. Instead, the three of you stand in the living room in a triangle facing each other and he begins reciting the plan. “Remember…”

Nancy goes first. “Straight into Will’s room and–” 

“Don’t step on the trap.” You finish.

Jonathan nods. “And then?”

“Wait for the yo-yo to move.” The girl says. 

“Then…” Jonathan flicks the lighter on.

You whistle low. “Let there be light…” 

“Right. Light.” The boy nods again. “Alright, we ready?”

“Ready.”

“Scar time.” 

Jonathan and Nancy bring their hands up and place their knives flat against their palms. You roll up your sleeve and place your own knife against the upper part of your arm, just below your shoulder, and take a deep breath. 

“On three,” Jonathan says. He begins counting and you all can’t seem to stop shaking. He senses your unease and looks up at you and Nancy. “You guys don’t have to do this.”

Nancy glares at him, her own voice shaky. “Jonathan, stop talking.”

You nod. “Yeah, what she said.”

Jonathan tries to argue, but Nancy squeezes her eyes shut and yells, “Three!”

You close your own eyes and slice at your arm, the pain immediate. You gasp out, never having been good with pain, but you know you have to do this for Will. The blood trails down your arm, dripping from your elbow onto the ground, and you watch as blood from Jonathan’s and Nancy’s own cuts falls onto the ground too. 

Well, at least it’ll be an easy scar to hide compared to theirs. 

“Fuck, that stings.” You say to break the silence, and Nancy nods her head in agreement. 

“Not the most pleasant feeling.” 

Jonathan guides the two of you over to the couch and grabs the first aid kit that you had prepared on the coffee table. He sits in the middle, leaving room for both you and Nancy on each side of him, but you’re still pissed at him and opt to sit on the floor in front of the couch.

Nancy begins to patch up his wound, and it takes everything within you not to reach over and help him yourself. It feels unnatural to watch someone else taking care of him, but the space between you still feels too vast to cross. 

You patch up your own cut while the two of them talk quietly. You wind a bandage tight around your arm, ensuring you won’t bleed through, and Jonathan watches above you with guilt in his eyes. Nancy is trying to reassure him that everything will be okay, but as he watches you struggle to tie the bandage he wonders if he’s fucked up more than just your friendship.

“Bug, let me help with that.” He leans down and ties your bandage before you can stop him. 

You glare at him, still having not said anything to Jonathan besides what was needed for preparation. Nancy distracts herself by cleaning up around his cut and your stomach twists into knots. This is all so miserable. 

“Y/N, I know you’re upset with me and you can go whenever. I won’t blame you, you’ve done enough for me.” Jonathan says, trying to catch your eye. 

You turn away and inspect your bandage, still reeling over the fact that he tied it for you. “I’m here for Will, and only Will.”

“Y/N…” There’s a hurt in his voice that almost makes you turn around to throw your arms around his neck and whisper a million apologies to him. To tell him everything, that you love him and that you’d do anything for him and that’s why you’re so terrified of how you feel. You know you’d burn yourself up if it meant he’d be taken care of, if it meant he was safe and happy and far away from anything that could harm him. You know you’d use up everything within you to love him. 

Instead, you remain silent.

After getting no response from you, Jonathan clears his throat and begins to say something about how the lights will serve as an alarm for the monster, trying to pretend that everything is okay, but he’s cut off by a sudden pounding on the door.

You all jump and your fingers tighten around your switchblade, ready to open it. As your heart pounds you think of all the possible ways the plan could go wrong. When you’re on possibility number twelve, a voice calls through the door. 

“Jonathan?”

“Is that… Steve?” You say out loud, in complete disbelief. 

Steve continues to pound on the door. “Are you there, man? It’s… It’s Steve! Listen, I just wanna talk!”

You’re the first to react, standing up to run over to the door. You fling it open and step outside, making sure Steve won’t be able to see inside the house. When he sees you, he stumbles back a bit. “Henderson?”

His face is still bleeding from earlier and his hair is a mess, and yet there’s a softness to him that you haven’t seen before with him. “Steve, now isn’t really a good time.”

“Can I just talk to Jonathan real quick? I just… I want to apologize about what happened earlier, see if we can maybe–” His eyes land on your bandaged arm. You curse and roll down your sleeve, feeling like an idiot for forgetting to hide the wound before going outside. 

Steve reaches out to touch it, a hint of worry on his face and his voice is now full of concern. “Hey, are you okay?”

You shiver at his touch, it’s gentle as he skims along the bandage and inspects it for any other problems. You pull away, now hiding the wound. “It’s nothing, but you should really go.”

“I want to help you, Y/N. Do you need me to get you anything?” His face is so full of worry for you that it makes you ache. Then a thought occurs to him. “Wait, where’s Byers? Why isn’t he here to help you?”

You’re about to make up a lie, but Nancy flings the door open. “Steve, listen to me.”

He looks between the two of you in complete shock. “Okay, what–”

“You need to leave.” Nancy orders.

Steve looks at you. “I’m not trying to start anything, okay?”

“I know, but–” You get cut off by Nancy.

“I don’t care about that. You need to leave.”

Steve begins to plead with the girl and you step away a bit, not wanting to intrude. You feel bad for him, he looks so beat down by what’s happened today and you suppose that you can’t really blame him. After spending maybe a total of ten hours with Nancy and Jonathan, you also have come close to losing your mind. 

If you were with Jonathan, if you truly had him, you’d react the same as Steve. Begging for the girl he loves to listen to him, to give him another chance with the promise of him changing. 

“I just want to make things right.” Steve says, impressing you with his vulnerability. He’s openly admitting to his mistakes and taking accountability mere hours after the situation has occurred, leaving you both in awe of him and also saddened for him. He loves Nancy more than anything, you can hear it in his voice. 

He deserves better. 

As you’re thinking this, you see his eyes flicker down towards Nancy’s bandaged hand and his brows furrow. “What happened to your hand? Is that blood?” His eyes now flicker over to you again. “Why are you both hurt?”

“We’re clumsy?” You say as Nancy yanks her hand away from Steve.

“It was an accident.” She agrees. 

Steve looks between the two of you, now sensing that something else is wrong. “What’s going on?” 

“Nothing!” Nancy insists, but something in Steve’s demeanor shifts. 

“Wait a second, did he do this to you? To Y/N?” His once soft voice is now filled with anger and you step in front of him. 

“Steve, it wasn’t Jonathan. You need to go, I promise I’ll explain everything later–” 

He grabs you by your side and gently moves you so that he can get past and shove through the door. Nancy yells at him to stop and tries to push him out, but she’s useless against his strength. When he manages to break in, he stumbles inside and scans over the house. 

“Shit!” You follow after him, your brain running a million miles a second trying to figure out how to explain everything to him. 

“What the fuck?” Steve mumbles, eyeing the bat with nails in it. “Y/N, what’s going on here?”

He’s looking to you for reassurance and you guess he assumes that the two of you are allies in this Jonathan and Nancy situation. You really wish you could explain, but Jonathan has grabbed him by the shoulders and is trying to push him outside. The two stumble around for a few seconds and you just helplessly watch. 

“Steve, there’s no time to explain, please just listen to Jonathan and get out of here!” You’re helping Jonathan now, trying to get Steve out the door and away from harm’s reach, but he’s still fighting back confused and lost as ever and you pity him. 

You hear a click and turn around, gasping when you see Nancy holding her gun up to Steve. “Woah, what the fuck Nancy?”

“What! What is going on?” Steve yells, now more panicked than anything else. 

While Jonathan has stepped away, you find yourself standing in front of Steve as if to somehow block the bullet. You can’t let him get hurt, he doesn’t have any part of this, he can still have a normal and happy life if he just leaves now. “Nancy, put the fucking gun down, this isn’t helping!”

Steve pleads with her as well and the two of you scream at the girl to just listen and not swing around loaded weapons, but Nancy remains firm in her stance. “You have five seconds to get out of here. I’m doing this for you.”

“Because holding a gun to his head is any better than telling him the truth?” You exclaim, entirely over the situation. 

As the four of you are arguing, the lights begin to flicker. Steve and Nancy don’t seem to notice, but you do. You look at Jonathan and say your first real words to him in hours. “Jonathan…”

He hears you and he runs over to your side, grabbing your hand as the two of you stand shoulder to shoulder. You feel your heartbeat race and you can feel him shaking beside you. He’s terrified, so are you, but his hand around yours manages to steady you. 

“Nancy!” Jonathan tries to get the girl’s attention, but she’s too busy counting down to hear him. 

He shouts at her again and the lights start to flicker more wildly and you draw your switchblade out, adrenaline coursing through you. It’s time. 

Jonathan yells once more and finally catches Nancy’s attention. “The lights!”

She whips her head around and curses, Jonathan, still tightly holding your hand, tugs you along so that you follow him as he secures his weapons and grabs the bat. “It’s here.”

“What’s here?” Steve is flailing around, utterly lost.

You all ignore him and now stand back to back in a triangle. Nancy holds up her gun, Jonathan wields his bat, and you flick your wrist to bring out your knives. “Where is it?”

“I don’t know!” 

The lights flicker rapidly and you feel overwhelmed. They were supposed to serve as a guide towards the monster, but there's no possible way to see which direction it’ll come from and for a fleeting moment you think you’ve made a huge mistake. 

Steve is still screaming, demanding answers, but you’re too busy scanning your surroundings to offer him some information. “Hello? Will someone please explain to me what the hell is going–”

The roof opens up, cutting Steve off, and you scream as the monster attempts to come down right above you. Jonathan shields you from the fallen debris and you cling onto him in utter fear. This isn’t real. This cannot be happening. 

Nancy begins to shoot at the thing while Jonathan guides you to safety. He brings you to the edge of the living room and holds your face in his hands, forcing you to really look at him for the first time all night. “Listen to me, stay here while I get Nancy.”

He kisses your forehead and then leaves, rushing over to Nancy to pull her away and guide her towards Will’s room. Steve stands next to you, frozen, and it forces you back to reality. The plan, you have to stick to the plan. 

You grab Steve’s hand and yank him so that he follows. The monster has dropped down now, a horrible creature on all fours that opens its gaping mouth to let out a horrible screech that you feel deep within your bones. This is what killed Barb. 

The four of you run to Will’s room and you only just barely have enough time to warn Steve about the bear trap. You look over your shoulder and shout, “Jump!” right as your ankle catches on its chains. 

You fall. Hard. 

Pain sears through your ankle and you try to get up, but any pressure on it sends flames through your entire body and you let out another scream. The monster catches up, looming over you, and you brace for your death. There’s no fucking way you’re getting out of this. 

You squeeze your eyes as the monster stalks close to you, its ugly mouth open and ready to kill you. Jonathan is screaming at you to get up, but Nancy is holding him back from helping. You’re relieved by this, knowing that someone has to be there for Will once this is all done. He’ll need his brother, and Nancy seems to understand this. You catch her eye and nod at her, sending a silent thank you. 

“Bug! No, let go of me! I have to help her, Nancy!” Jonathan’s voice becomes hoarse by how loud he screams, his voice breaking with fear and desperation. 

Then, right before the monster lunges at you, you feel a familiar pair of arms slide underneath your legs and pick you up. “What–”

Steve Harrington has swooped in to save you, picking you up as if you weigh nothing, ever the athlete, and swiftly jumps over the bear trap while screaming his head off. “Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!”

You’re so delirious from the pain in your ankle and the adrenaline pumping through your veins that you can’t help but let a laugh escape you. No fucking way is any of this real. Steve Harrington is carrying you bridal style into Will’s bedroom with Jonathan and Nancy as witnesses. 

What a life. 

Once you’re both secured in the room, Steve sets you down gently right as Nancy yells at him to shut up. As soon as Steve lets go of you, Jonathan is at your side and pulls you into a crushing hug. 

“Bug.” He breathes out against your ear, relief heavy. 

“I’m okay.” You tell him, threading your fingers through his hair. He’s shaking harder than ever, and holding onto you as if he’s scared he’ll lose you again. “I’m okay, bee.” 

He pulls away and his hands are all over you, checking everywhere for any other injuries. “Did it hurt you, are you bleeding? There should be a first aid kit–”

You grab his hands and kiss his knuckles, which seems to calm him down a bit. “I’m fine, just twisted my ankle. If you help me up, I’m sure I’ll be able to stand again.” 

Jonathan quickly helps you to your feet and you lean against him for the extra support. While you put on a brave face for Jonathan, you’re terrified out of your fucking mind. You almost died. Jonathan is still holding your hand and he’s looking at you as if seeing you for the first time and you force yourself to look away. It’s the same look from the field days ago, when you thought he’d kiss you. 

You have to focus on what’s at stake.

How the hell are you guys supposed to kill this thing?

The monster screeches, breaking the moment between you and Jonathan, and he flicks his lighter on and forces you to stand behind him. Nancy holds up her gun and you bring your knives closer to your face, Steve standing weaponless behind you. 

You all wait, tense, for the monster. It stalks closer to the room, its awful growls alerting you of its proximity, but it doesn’t appear. 

“What’s it doing?” Nancy asks, frustrated. 

“I don’t know.” You respond, equally as frustrated and scared. 

Another few agonizing seconds pass, and you stare at the yo-yo and hope that it remains still. Then, the lights stop flickering and it becomes quiet. All you can hear is your blood roaring in your ears. 

Nancy looks around. “Do you hear anything?”

“No,” Jonathan shakes his head, inching closer to the door. 

“Wait!” You tug at your still interlocked hands. You pick up his bat that had been thrown on the ground and hand it to him. “Be careful. Please.”

He gives your hand one last squeeze before letting go, accepting the bat.

As Jonathan pokes his head out to see if the monster is outside, Steve bends his head down and whispers in your ear, “Romantic.”

“Shut. Up.” You hit him in the chest, fearfully watching your best friend to make sure he doesn't die. When he motions an all clear, Nancy follows him outside, then you, then Steve. 

The house is silent and your heart sinks when you see that the bear trap has been left untouched. You realize with a horrible gut wrench that the monster is smarter than the three of you had anticipated. 

So much for your plan, then.

“It’s smarter than we thought.” 

“Yeah,” Jonathan agrees with dismay. 

He stalks against the wall towards the living room and you all follow in a single file line. You do your best to stick close to the wall but you limp with every step. Your ankle is definitely out of commission for now. Great. 

All of you are on edge, waiting for the other shoe to drop. It couldn’t have been that easy, there’s no possible way that the monster simply up and left. You enter the living room, which has gotten even more wrecked due the monster. The wallpaper has been torn off of some parts of the wall and you see papers scattered everywhere. 

“Shit…” you mumble, kicking at a shredded wallpaper strip. 

In the corner, Steve has started to hyperventilate and mumble to himself. “This is crazy, this is so crazy, this is fucking crazy.” 

You limp over to him and grab his shoulders, making him face you. “Steve, hey. It’s okay, I’m here.”

“Y/N, what the hell just happened?” 

“It’s… complicated. For now, can you trust me that everything will be okay?” 

“Of course I trust you, it’s just…” He nods, his eyes softening. You lessen your hold on him and give him a smile, he seems to be calming down. Then, he looks around the room and seemingly remembers where he is. “This is crazy!” 

Steve lunges for the phone on the wall and tries to call for help. 

You stumble after him, the pain in your ankle slowing you down. “Steve, wait–”

Nancy gets to him first, grabbing the phone out of his hand and throwing it across the room. He looks at her, shocked. “What are you doing? Are you insane?”

“It’s going to come back!” Nancy yells at him, and you wince at the way she treats him. You know Steve will only listen to her, but she could at least be nicer about the whole situation. The three of you have had some time to process everything happening, Steve was thrown into the deep end. 

“You could be a little nicer,” you mumble, and Nancy sends you a glare. You raise your hands up in surrender. “Sorry.” 

“Steve, you need to leave. Right now.”

He looks so overwhelmed and you give him a pitying look. He stares at you, reminiscent of the way he looked at you earlier in the alley, silently begging you to say something, anything, but again you can only shake your head at him. You won’t force him to stay, it wouldn’t be fair.

“Y/N, please…” He tries one more time to get you on his side, but you can’t. Frustrated by your lack of response, Steve groans. “Fuck it!” 

He runs out the door. 

You’ll admit that you’re a bit disappointed, but you also understand. Who in their right mind would stay? 

You and Nancy share a look before the lights begin to flicker again. Dread fills you. “Fuck…”

Jonathan is back by your side and he and Nancy again form a triangle with you, all your backs pressed together as you desperately try to locate the monster. You all stumble in a circle, searching for any sign of the thing, but there’s nothing. 

“Where is it?” Nancy gasps out.

“Just fucking show yourself!” You shout, just wanting this all to be over with. Your body is drained from living in a state of fear for so long. 

“Come on you son of a bitch!” Jonathan echoes your taunts. 

Suddenly the lights turn off and you’re left alone in complete darkness. Faintly you can hear the monster’s familiar growl approaching from behind you. The hair on the back of your neck stands up, the air stands still. It’s back. Before you can react, it pounces on Jonathan. 

“Jonathan!” You scream alongside Nancy. Desperation takes over you and before you can even process what’s happening, you ignore the pain in your ankle and jump onto its back, stabbing repeatedly at it. 

Your blades only bounce off of its thick skin and the monster struggles to get you off. You hold on as tight as you can, shouting and kicking at it so that it can’t hurt him, but then it opens its mouth and for a horrifying moment you’re afraid that Jonathan will die.

“No!” You scream even louder than before and double down on your effort, stabbing and slashing as much as you possibly can to try and create some damage, but your arms are starting to ache and your ankle now feels like it’s on fire. 

“Nancy, its skin is too thick!” You sob out, nearing complete exhaustion. Then, just as you’re about to collapse from exhaustion, gunshots fill the room. 

Nancy begins to shoot at the monster and with the help of your blades, the two of you manage to pierce its skin, but even then the damage is minimal. It’s not enough, it won’t be enough. Tears stream down your face and the monster only gets closer to Jonathan, so you do the only thing you can think of: you crawl onto the top of its body and stab at its mouth. 

The monster lets out a blood curdling scream and flings you off of its back. You go flying across the room and land against the wall with a groan. All the air has been knocked out of you and your ribs are definitely going to be bruised tomorrow. Every part of you aches, but you manage to lift your head up and blearily process the monster now approaching Nancy as she continues to shoot at it, but it remains unphased. 

You crawl over to Jonathan, who is still laying on the ground. He’s motionless, and you fight everything within you not to break down and sob. You have to keep going, he has to be alive. As you reach Jonathan and frantically check for a pulse, the monster has now cornered Nancy and her gun seems to be out of bullets.

It’s over. You know it is. 

Right as you’ve accepted your fate, a screaming Steve Harrington wielding Jonathan’s bat once again manages to save the day. 

He hits the monster with the bat, effectively saving Nancy and you’re so impressed with his batting skills that you almost find him attractive with how easily he hits and dodges the monster. However, you file those thoughts away for later and finally manage to wake Jonathan up. He startles with a gasp and you check over his chest, scared he may have gotten pierced by the monster’s claws. 

“I’m fine, we need to help.”

You help each other up and you have to lean heavily against him due to your ankle. You bull riding the monster has only made the sprain worse; you’re too afraid to look down and see the damage that’s been done. 

As the two of you hobble over to Nancy, Jonathan looks at you. “Is Harrington really here right now?”

“Yes.”

“Lovely.”

Steve manages to lure the monster closer and closer to the bear trap and you watch him in awe. He’s quick footed and so sure of himself, the complete opposite of the boy from only ten minutes ago who had run out of the house screaming his head off. Now, Steve is swift with his hits and even twirls the bat in his hand to show off. The small act causes you to smile despite the horrible circumstances. 

By the time you and Jonathan are up and recovered, Steve has successfully led the monster straight into the trap. It clamps around the monster’s foot and it screeches, flailing around in the trap. Steve still has his bat held up, now frantically looking over to everyone else. “He’s in the trap! He’s stuck!”

“Jonathan, now!” Nancy screams, motioning over at him to use his lighter. 

Jonathan listens, using his free hand to flick the lighter on and then drops it onto the ground, right into the trail of gasoline. Immediately the monster goes up in flames, letting out horrible noises. You all shield your faces from the flames and Jonathan pulls you closer into him, still having yet to let go of you; you feel yourself sink into his side as you watch the monster wither away.

“Bug, I have to get the fire extinguisher, do you think you can stand on your own?” Jonathan asks you, his voice soft but urgent. 

You quickly nod and brace yourself for his departure. “Yeah, go.” 

He lets go of you as gently as possible before running to grab the extinguisher. When he has it, he orders everyone to get back and then smothers the flames. It takes a couple seconds, but eventually the fire gets put out, leaving behind an awful stench that makes everyone cough and gag. 

“Holy fuck,” you wheeze out, hunched over. “Burnt monster smells horrible.” 

“Yeah, no kidding.” Steve coughs out. 

Nancy covers her face with her jacket. “Where did it go?”

“It has to be dead.” Jonathan pants against the wall, looking like he’s three seconds away from passing out. “It has to be.”

“It fucking better be dead.” You mumble, hobbling closer to see what exactly was left behind. When you get closer and see the giant lump of melted skin all over the bear trap, you gag. “Oh god. Yeah, okay. It’s dead.”

Everyone sighs with relief. 

Then, you notice a Christmas light above you flicker on. Your heart stops, terrified that the monster has somehow survived, but then a second one turns on, then a third, until a path seems to be guiding you towards the living room. 

You all follow, cautious but curious, but these lights don’t feel threatening. There’s an energy to them, a comforting one that leaves you breathless. When you get to the living room, tears form in your eyes, now understanding what this all is. You look at Jonathan, who also seems to be thinking what you are. 

It’s Joyce, you know it is. 

“Mom,” he breathes out. 

You limp over to him and grab his hand. He turns to you, his eyes shining with an appreciation that he only ever has for you. He seems to be drinking you in, as if now realizing just how close the two of you came to dying tonight. You’re doing the same, thankful that he’s alive and standing next to you despite everything. There’s so much the two of you want to say, but as always the words aren’t needed. You understand each other perfectly, the balance between you centered once more. 

You put your head on Jonathan’s shoulder and he brings his hand to your hair to softly stroke it. The two of you stand like that for a second, breathing each other in and enjoying the tenderness after such a miserable day, before you slowly break apart and follow the lights going outside. 

The porch light flickers and Nancy stands next to you, watching it with uncertainty. “Where’s it going?”

“I don’t think it’s the monster.” Jonathan tells her. 

“It’s Will.” You don’t know how you know this, or what makes you feel so certain that you’re right, but somehow you know that you are. Somewhere deep within you, you feel the faint outline of hope flicker. 

A new silence surrounds the four of you at your words, and for once there’s hope between you all. Then, after a minute or so of silence, everyone begins to head back inside. Steve first, then Nancy, and finally Jonathan, leaving you alone with the crisp early winter air.

You take a deep breath, the cold air serving as a reminder that you’re alive. You let it fill your lungs until you can’t breathe in anymore, then you release the air through an exhale and feel your body settle into its exhaustion. This is the first time you’ve had a moment to yourself, so you let the exhaustion weigh upon you like a warm blanket. 

Will is safe, you can feel it. Despite everything, he’s safe and alive. Jonathan is too, still your best friend regardless of all the unspoken words between the two of you. Dustin is at the school with the kids, away from danger. Everything is okay, it’ll be okay. 

You let the moment wash over you, incredibly grateful to be lucky enough to have survived it all. Everyone you love and hold close to you is safe. You didn’t fuck up this time. God, you did it. 

Jonathan comes running out after a while, his face alight with joy and he crashes into you and picks you up to twirl you around. You laugh, loud and freely, and bury your face in his hair as he continues. “Bee, stop! Put me down, you dummy!” 

He does as he’s told, but doesn’t let go of you once your feet are on the ground. “My mom just called, they saved Will. He–he’s in the hospital, he’s okay.” 

You squeal and throw your arms around Jonathan again, squeezing him so hard that you’re afraid you'll hurt him, but he simply laughs and squeezes you just as tight. Tears come again, but this time they’re happy ones, and if it weren’t for your ankle you’d be jumping up and down right now. 

Jonathan’s laughter dies down and he cups your chin around his fingers so that you look up at him. “You did it.” 

“We did it, bug.” You softly push against him. You can’t take all the credit. 

His eyes are shining again, you haven’t seen him this happy in so long, you get lost in it. His face is lit up and his smile is back and you’re so in love with him that it claws against your throat and threatens to spill out in excess.

A beat of silence passes and Jonathan just soaks your presence in. You can’t quite read his face, but for once this doesn’t frighten you. You enjoy it, you relish in the fact that he’s still yours yet now forming into someone new and lovely and wonderful. 

“You never gave up.” He whispers at last, adoration in his voice. 

“Never.” 

“You never left me.” 

“Never.” You breathe out, the word so simple with such heavy weight behind it. 

The moment is so raw, so tender, and Jonathan is giving you that look again, the one that leaves you feeling like the sun itself has settled upon you and kissed your cheek. His eyes flick down to your lips and you smile, taunting him to lean in. He seems to understand, giving you his own teasing smile before leaning in. You lean in as well, every part of you buzzing, and right before your lips touch his, Steve bursts through the door.

“Jonathan, dude, do you have like, any food in the house?” He asks, completely oblivious to what he’s just interrupted. 

You and Jonathan break apart, laughing the tension away. He ducks his head down, clears his throat, and turns to Steve. “Sorry, man. Been a little busy this week for grocery shopping.”

Steve’s eyes bulge out of his head. “Oh shit, right. Sorry, okay. Uh… Well, I’ll be inside, I guess.” 

“We’ll be in shortly.” You tell Steve. You want to be frustrated by his timing, but something tells you that you’ll have all the time in the world to tell Jonathan how you feel. Now just isn’t the time. 

– 

The moment you arrive at the hospital, Jonathan sprints out of the car and straight towards the front desk to find out where Will is. You and Nancy follow behind, figuring you won’t be able to see Will for a while since you’re not blood related, so the two of you wish Jonathan goodbye and head towards the waiting room. 

Steve lags behind, obviously unsure where to go. Nancy immediately walks inside, but you notice his hesitation and nudge his shoulder. “I’m sure that the cut on your eyebrow needs to be looked out. Let’s go sit, okay?”

He sighs deeply. “Yeah, sure. Totally. Let’s go sit in a room full of people who probably hate me. No biggie.”

“Either come or don’t.” You shrug. “But the way I see it, you can start mending some metaphorical wounds while you wait in there.”

You don’t wait for Steve to figure out what to do, you know that Dustin is somewhere inside the waiting room and you’re buzzing to see him and the rest of the kids. You hobble inside, still very much in pain due to your injuries, but the moment you see your brother it all fades away. 

He runs into your arms and almost knocks you down with the force. Dustin clings onto you, mumbling over and over again how sorry he is. 

“Hey, wait a second,” you pull him away and crouch down, groaning a bit at the pain. “What are you sorry about? What happened?”

You look around the room and see everyone there. Nancy, Hopper, the kids, Steve, even Nancy’s parents, but there’s someone missing…

“El,” you breathe out. 

Dustin’s lip trembles and he begins to cry. You soothe him, grabbing his hand to bring him over to the seats and sit between him and Mike. Lucas is to the left of Dustin and you can’t help but notice how all the boys have dried tears in their eyes. 

When they’re ready, you have the kids explain what happened, and the more they tell you, the more guilty you feel. You should’ve been there for them, you left them all alone with that monster. You got Will back, and yet you’ve lost El as a result. It seems that no matter what you do, it’ll never quite be enough in the end. 

“It’s not your fault.” You tell Dustin, who still keeps apologizing. It was you who had left him in charge, you’re why El ended up vanquished by the monster. “You did everything you could. I shouldn’t have left you guys all alone, but I’m proud that you all took care of one another, okay?”

He sniffs and nods his head, but you know he doesn’t believe you. All the boys are somber; you know it’ll take time for them to recover. So, you do what you do best, you console them. You hold their hands and rub their backs and offer your spare comics in your bag. You do whatever you can to comfort them, to reassure them that they’re safe now and that no one will hurt them, but the light in their eyes has dimmed. 

They’ll never be the same again. 

And El… she had been so young, you don’t think you’ll ever not feel the heavy weight of guilt whenever you think of her. She had been so sweet and had trusted you. 

You should’ve been there, you wish you could’ve saved her.

Steve watches from his seat across from you. He listens in as you comfort the boys, taking care of them in such a natural way. He admires this softer side of you, one he hasn’t quite seen before. Sure, you’ve always been gentle and sincere, but watching you with the kids is something special in itself. You manage to get them to laugh, you offer them your shoulder to cry or sleep on, and you read aloud to them stories from your comics and Steve finds himself drawn towards your interactions with the kids. 

It’s sweet, something delicate and lovely, and Steve admires everything that you are. When he sees you awkwardly stand up and stumble over to the vending machines in the hall, Steve finds himself following after you. 

-

“Bitch!” You slam the palm of your hand against the vending machine in vain. The bag of chips hangs by the little spiral, taunting you. 

“That’s not a very nice word, Henderson.” 

You turn and see Steve, leaning against the wall with a fond expression. “You stalking me?”

“Nah, just wanted to watch you fight against a vending machine.”

“Ha,” you snort, turning back to the machine. “Unless you can help me get this last chip bag, you’re free to go sit back down.”

You mean it to be a joke, not expecting Steve to actually listen, but he’s at your side within a second. “Step back, let Steve handle her.” 

“What–”

Steve motions for you to move, so you reluctantly do as you’re told. Once you’re out of the way, Steve claps his hands, stretches out his neck, and then begins to aggressively shake the vending machine. 

“That is so not what you’re supposed to do–”

Suddenly the bag drops down from the hook and into the retrieval slot. Steve reaches inside, grabs the bag, and then dangles it in the air. “Tada!” 

You laugh and grab the bag from him. “Okay, I’ll admit, that was impressive.” 

“What can I say? I’m charming like that.” 

“Sure,” you smile at him, neither of you have moved yet. He’s still standing in front of you with that cocky smile on his face that’s slowly started to warm on you. You truly do understand why so many girls have fallen for him. If you ever saw Steve on the street, a stranger passing by, you’d fall a little bit in love with him yourself.

The thought startles you. “Well, uh…”

“Yes?” Steve raises his eyebrows at you, smiling. 

“Thank you for the chips. The kids haven’t eaten anything in hours, so…” You wave the three bags in your arms. “Gotta keep 'em fed.”

“Wait a second, there’s only three bags there. Aren’t you going to eat anything?”

“I only had enough money for the boy’s chips.” You say, feeling suddenly sheepish. “It’s fine, though. I’ll just eat a few pieces from them and wait until we get home.”

Steve scoffs. “Yeah, no.”

You frown at him, confused as he rustles through his jean pocket and pulls out his wallet. “I don’t want your money–”

He doesn’t listen and simply puts the cash into the vending machine and punches in a few numbers. Slowly, one by one, multiple different bags of sweets and chips come falling down within the machine. Once the last one has dropped, Steve bends down and offers the huge stash to you. 

“A feast, on me.” He winks at you and you can’t help but blush. 

“T–thanks, I guess.” You now carefully balance the rest of the snacks in your arms, the mound almost blocking your view. You’re not sure how much Steve just paid, but with all these snacks you and the kids will surely be well fed. 

Steve shrugs, and if you weren’t so tired you’d think the blush on his face was a real one. “It’s the least I can do, all things considered.”

His words give you pause. You know he’s referencing earlier today, back in the alley where fists slammed against skin and he had dragged you away from your best friend, but the memory feels like years ago. So much has happened since then, Steve has saved your life since then. 

“Steve…” Your ankle is starting to sting again from standing for so long, so you adjust your footing and try to figure out what you want to say. “I never got to thank you back at Jonathan’s.”

“Thank me?” His face scrunches in confusion in a sickeningly cute way that it almost distracts you.

“Yes. You saved my life tonight, Steve. I won’t ever forget that.” 

“Oh…There’s no need to thank me. I mean, what are friends for?” Steve freezes and clears his throat. “I mean, shit. We aren’t friends, you keep saying that. Sorry. You know what I mean.”

You know you shouldn’t, but you laugh. Honestly, after everything you’ve been through tonight with Steve, how can he possibly think the two of you aren’t friends?

“Why are you laughing?” Steve mumbles, confused. 

“Sorry,” you wheeze out, still uncontrollably laughing. “It’s just–I mean, dude! We almost died together, of course we’re friends now!”

“We are?” He looks like a little kid on Christmas day being given the gift he’s always wanted.

Your heart warms. “Yes, idiot.”

Steve starts moving around in what you can only guess is a happy dance. “Sweet! Does this mean I get a cool nickname, too?”

“A nickname?” A bag of chips threatens to fall from your arms, but Steve catches it before it can land on the ground and takes a few more snacks off of your hands. 

He readjusts the snacks he now has so that he can carry them easier. “Yeah, I mean. Byers has one, why can’t I?”

You don’t think you’ll ever stop feeling so thrown every time Steve mentions a small detail about you that he’s somehow come to notice. He has a habit of doing that, surprising you by how much he seems to pay attention to you. You thought that no one ever had before, but Steve continues to prove you wrong. 

“I’ll tell ya what,” you begin to walk back towards the waiting room, careful to step carefully to not drop anything or upset your ankle. “Let’s see how this ���friends’ thing works out, then I’ll decide what nickname fits you best. Deal?”

Steve thinks for a moment and follows. “Hmm. I don’t know, I think I’ll need some type of precaution to make sure you give me a nickname in the end. I want one, Y/N. I’m so serious right now.”

You laugh at his pleading tone. “I can add you to my baking list. Whatever I bake, you’ll get a piece of it. Is that better?”

“God, yes!” Steve punches the air and cheers. 

You’re smiling so much that your face aches. You haven’t felt this light and carefree in so long, you’d almost forgotten what it’s like. The two of you don’t say anything else as you walk back to the waiting room, though Steve seems to slow down so that you don’t hurt your ankle keeping up, though you still let out a few winces and groans.

When you’ve arrived back at your seat, Steve sets down the snacks and runs off without another word. You’re confused by his sudden departure but don’t think much of it. Instead, you wake the boys up and show them your array of snacks, which wakes them up immediately. 

You’re mediating a fight between Mike and Lucas over who gets the bag of Chips Ahoy when a nurse interrupts. “Excuse me, ma’am. This young man over here told me I should come over and check out your ankle?”

The woman smiles and you look past her and see Steve sheepishly waving from his seat across from you. You’re stunned. Had he really gone out of his way to ensure your ankle gets treated?

You shake the thoughts out of your head and inform the woman all she needs to know. You tell her how you’d fallen and what type of pain you feel when you stand up. She inspects the ankle, her fingers cold but kind, and within a few minutes has diagnosed you with a sprained ankle. 

“All you can really do is stay off of it for a few weeks while it heals. I can go and get you some crutches, if you’d like?” She asks, rolling her gloves off and tucking them back into her pocket.

You nod. “If you wouldn’t mind, that’d be great.”

The nurse leaves with the promise of being back soon. In the meantime she instructs you to keep your ankle elevated, so you prop it against the coffee table and wait. You’re annoyed that you even have to have crutches, but then you think of Barb, of El. You’re luckier than you should be. 

– 

After an hour or so, Jonathan opens the door to the waiting room. He spots you and Mike talking softly with each other and whistles over to catch your attention. When Mike looks up, Jonathan nods at him and the boy scrambles out of his seat. 

“Guys! Guys! He’s up, Will is up!” Mike shakes awake Lucas and Dustin, who had been cuddling on the seats fast asleep. “Will’s up!”

Once they’re awake, they quickly follow after Mike and the three boys are gone in an instant, sprinting down the hall towards Will’s room. Clearly they’re eager to see their friend. 

You do your best to get up as fast as possible, but your new crutches serve more as a nuisance rather than an aid. As you struggle to get up, somehow knocking over the mountain of snacks, Steve rushes over. 

He grabs the crutches and offers you his hand. “Here, careful.”

“Thanks,” you awkwardly accept his hand and get up. Jonathan watches from the doorway, a curious look on his face. Nancy does the same from her seat, not saying a word as she watches Steve gently help you navigate the waiting room with your injury. 

Jonathan holds the door open for you and takes over once you’re out the door. He grabs the crutches from Steve and is now the one to hold your hand, balancing you. “I can take it from here, Harrington.”

“Right, yeah.” Steve scratches the back of his head and coughs. “I’ll just… yeah.” 

He heads back inside and you and Jonathan watch as he leaves. As soon as he’s out of earshot, Jonathan turns to you. “Are you two friends now or something?”

“We almost died tonight, bee. I think it’s safe to call Steve a friend now.”

Jonathan bites his lip, though there’s a far off look in his eye that leaves you feeling like you’ve missed something in the conversation. “Guess that’s true. Anyways, let’s get you to Will.”

By the time you make it to the room, the boys have swarmed around Will and are telling him everything he’s missed this week. He’s listening eagerly as they’re telling him about El, but when he sees you enter the room, his eyes light up and he tries to sit up. 

“Y/N!” Will calls out, pure excitement in his voice. 

You practically fall over in your haste to get to him. The second you’re close enough, you collapse onto his bed and give him the tightest hug you possibly can without hurting him. He feels so small against you, smaller than he’s ever felt before, and his sunken eyes and pale skin make you want to cry. 

But he’s alive and here and in your arms once again, happy and wonderful and safe. 

“Little bee,” you try not to cry, but tears are thick in your voice. “I missed you.”

Will manages a weak smile and shrugs, trying to play off the gravity of the situation. “Took a little detour home.” 

You laugh and ruffle his hair. “At least you came home, that’s all that matters.”

“Ahem,” Mike obnoxiously clears his throat, effectively ending your moment with Will. “You’re hogging Will, move over.” 

You laugh again and move away, allowing the boys to resume their millions of updates. You maneuver your crutches and walk over to Jonathan, who is standing by the door. He’s looking at the boys and Will with a soft smile on his face and you join him, standing side by side as you watch your boys finally come together again. 

Then, you feel a pair of eyes on you and you turn around. Nancy is leaning against the doorway behind you; she looks frail and distraught. There’s a sadness in her eyes as she watches the kids. You know that watching the boys reunite with their friend must remind her of Barb. She never got her happy reunion. 

You feel awful for the girl, so when her bittersweet smile drops and she turns to leave the room, you nudge Jonathan to make him aware of the situation. He sees her fleeing and begins to follow after her, but he stops. 

“What are you waiting for? Go.” You tell him, knowing it’s for the best. 

He shifts his weight, uncertain. “Are you sure?”

You’re not sure how to decipher the hidden meanings underneath those three words, but you find that you’re exhausted trying to keep reading between the lines. The feelings you’ve kept buried bubble to the surface, but you remind yourself that he loves Nancy, despite your weird moments of almost with him. There’s something there between you and Jonathan, you both can feel it, but it feels too raw and fragile to bring into the light. 

Without having to ask, you know that Jonathan will choose her. 

It breaks your heart, but you look over at Dustin and Will, who are laughing about some joke while Joyce gazes at them fondly, and you know that you can’t lose this. Maybe Jonathan knows this, too. The small family you’ve built together, it’s too precious to ruin. 

Joyce and your boys, you can’t lose them. They’re yours, and Jonathan is yours in a way that you can’t quite keep to yourself forever, but for now it’s enough. You approach Joyce, grab her hand and give her a tired smile, and the smile she returns to you reminds you that this is more than enough for you. 

You turn to Jonathan, pushing down your feelings once more in favor of appreciating the fact that Will is looking at you again, alive. “Go, bee.” 

Jonathan gives you one last look. You study his face for a moment, watching as it shifts from confusion, to hurt, then finally into acceptance. You’ll never be sure of what exactly he’d been thinking in that moment, but it seemed to have been enough for him, too.

He smiles, lets out a deep breath, and then leaves.

The door closes softly behind him. 

– 

A month later you find yourself in the passenger seat of Jonathan's car, tired from your shift at Bookstrordinary but excited to pick up your brothers. Somehow, even after missing three consecutive shifts last month, Mrs. Waters refused to fire you. 

But Jonathan? He hadn’t been so lucky. His boss fired him from the Hawk, but he hadn’t been too upset. He still drives you to and from work, so you suppose things could be worse. 

It’s late, but the two of you take your time driving to the Wheeler’s. Nothing much has changed between you two following Will’s reappearance. Sure, maybe you’re at his house more just to make sure Will is adapting well, but besides that everything seemed to go back to normal. 

Well, almost normal. 

Steve appeared at your job a few days after your conversation in the hospital. He had surprised you when you walked in, and when you asked what he was doing in a bookstore, Steve simply shrugged and said, “You can’t figure out my nickname if we don’t hang out, right? So, I’m here.”

He had become a regular at the store, stopping by whenever he could, and slowly the two of you became good friends. You’ve come to enjoy Steve’s presence, something that you never thought would ever happen. But he keeps you company as you work, he wanders around and explores the comics and books you recommend to him, and it’s nice having someone to goof off with. 

Plus, you did promise to add him to your baking list, so he’s also become your taste tester who happily eats any creation you bring in for him.

As for Nancy…

That was more of a sore subject for Jonathan. 

There was a few weeks following Will’s reappearance that you thought Jonathan and Nancy would get together, but it never happened. You’re not quite sure why, maybe it had something to do with Jonathan’s hesitation of approaching her, but it had crushed him when you and he saw Nancy and Steve making out in the hall as if nothing bad had ever happened. 

The way Jonathan’s face crumbled when he saw the couple only solidified that he’d never be yours, but you comforted him anyways. You told him he deserved better and then dragged him away. It’d taken him a few days, but eventually Jonathan was able to fake a smile again. 

You haven’t spoken about it since that day, but you leave your window open most nights for him to crawl in. The nightmares from that night fighting the monster plague you both, and the loneliness feels a little heavier than usual, but at least you have each other. 

“Jonathan! Y/N! Come in, the boys are downstairs.” Mrs. Wheeler answers the door, letting the two of you in. “And Y/N, I love that sweater on you.”

You thank the woman. “It was a gift from my mom. She claims I need to up my wardrobe, whatever that means.”

“Well, I think she has lovely taste.” 

“I’ll let you know you think so!” You open the basement door and motion for Jonathan to go down first. 

When he reaches the bottom of the steps, Jonathan makes a face. “Woah, what’s that smell? Have you guys been playing games all day, or just farting?”

“My vote is farting.” You say, hopping down the last step. Your ankle has mostly healed by now, but sometimes if you land on it wrong it makes a weird clicking noise followed by some pain, but you choose to pretend that it’s normal. 

The boys laugh and Lucas points at your brother. “Oh, that’s just Dustin. He farted.”

He begins making fart noises with his mouth and you and Dustin share a look. “Very mature, Lucas.”

The boy continues to sing and make fart noises and you can’t believe that this is your life. You’re standing in a smelly basement while picking up your stubborn brother all while simultaneously enjoying the fact that you get to call this your life. 

Jonathan calls over to Will to grab his things, so you follow suit and gently berate Lucas. “Alright, that’s enough. I gotta get Dustin home.”

“What, I thought I got to stay–”

“Jonathan is our ride and I made cookies, so let’s go.”

The moment the word “cookies” leaves your mouth, Dustin hops up and collects his things without any further argument. 

Once he’s ready, he and Lucas play wrestle as they say goodbye. While they’re distracted, you walk over to Mike and discreetly hand him a container full of double fudge brownies. You’d specifically made them for him, knowing they were his favorite, because you noticed how hard it’s been for him to adjust to El being gone. He really cared about her, anyone could see that. 

Mike’s eyes widen and he throws his arms around you. “Thanks, Y/N.”

You pat his back. “Anytime, Wheeler.”

Dustin breaks away from Lucas and runs up the stairs, so you take that as your cue to leave. 

Upstairs, Jonathan and Will are talking to Mrs. Wheeler. When they see you enter, the woman turns to you and asks if you’ll be bringing over your usual round of holiday treats. “Of course, I’ll get started on them tomorrow. You guys still like the sugarbread cookies?”

“If you make them, I think I’ll die of happiness.” Mrs. Wheeler informs you, and you laugh and tell her that you’ll have them ready as soon as possible. 

You bid her goodbye, Dustin now by your side, and you follow Jonathan and Will to the front door. Right before you open the door, Nancy calls Jonathan’s name from the top of the stairs. 

“Hey, Jonathan, wait up!” 

You, Dustin, and Will stand awkwardly in the back while Nancy hands Jonathan a wrapped gift and wishes him a merry Christmas. They share an awkward exchange since Jonathan hadn’t gotten her anything, but Nancy assures him that it’s fine. The interaction is painful to watch as Nancy doesn’t spare you a single glance. Dustin and Will look at you uncertainly when she kisses Jonathan’s cheek, but you ignore them and pretend to be interested in a Christmas decoration on the table.

This will never get any easier. 

“You ready?” Jonathan turns back to you guys, a blush on his face, and all you can do is silently nod. 

In the car you sit in the back with Dustin, who squeezes your arm in reassurance. He’s come to understand your complex feelings for Jonathan and has pieced together Nancy’s involvement. While he’s never outright consoled you, he’s shown his support in other small and wonderful ways. 

“Thanks,” you whisper, and Dustin smiles. 

“We all buckled up?” Jonathan asks as he starts up the car. 

“Yes, captain.” You mock salute. 

Will giggles at you before he sees the gift and looks up at Jonathan. “Can I open it?”

“Yeah, sure.” 

You and Dustin lean forward so you can see what’s in the box. When Will unwraps a beautiful, and no doubt expensive, camera, you gasp. The bitterness and hurt from moments ago vanishes. This gift is from Steve, you know it is, and something warm settles deep within your bones. 

You think about last month, how you’d told him not everyone can just afford a camera. 

Seems like Steve listened. 

Maybe he isn’t so bad after all. 

– 

A week later you knock on the Byers’ door, a giant container of your annual holiday cookies in your arms. 

“Bug!” Jonathan answers the door with an excited smile on his face. His new camera is in his hands and before you can even process what’s happening, he’s already taken a photo of you with your crooked earmuffs and oversized box of cookies.

He’s been using the camera ever since he got it. There’s now multiple pictures of you, always unaware or caught off guard, now hanging in the kitchen. It makes you blush to think about. 

“You didn’t even give me a chance to smile.” You complain, shoving your way inside. It’s snowing and you’re freezing. 

Joyce grabs the container to help you as soon as she sees you. “Here, honey. I’ve got it.”

You thank her and walk over to Will, who is drawing at the kitchen table. “Hey little bee. Whatcha drawing?”

“Hi, Y/N.” He slides over his picture and you’re shown a quick sketch of you and the party, this time fighting what appears to be a misshapen dog. “It’s a Dire Wolf, we’re fighting it in our latest campaign.”

“Ah, I see. Looks fluffy, though. Can’t possibly be a dangerous creature.”

Will rolls his eyes at you. “This is why you don’t play with us.”

“Careful, you’re sassing the girl who has just bravely ridden her bike through the snow to deliver her famous Christmas cookies.”

Will is out of his seat in an instant, running over to his mom, who has just placed the container on the counter. “Did you make the oatmeal raisin cookies?”

“Duh,” you snort. 

“And the chocolate chip?”

“I sure did.” You stand next to him and point at a new cookie you’re trying out this year. “This batch is a caramel banana one. Steve seemed to like it and I think it’s pretty good, so I hope you do too.”

Jonathan swoops over and kisses your head. “Of course we’ll like it, bug.”

“He’s right, you know. We always love whatever you make us, honey.” Joyce informs you, her mouth now full of cookies. 

“I’d hope so, this is like my fifth year making these for you guys. It’d be awkward if you hated my baking.” You say, now securing your earmuffs back on your head. “Anyways, I should get going. It’s Christmas, my mom won’t want me out too long.” 

Joyce looks out the window and frowns. “Did you really bike here in this weather?”

“It wasn’t too bad, I’ll be fine–”

“No. Jonathan, grab your keys and drive Y/N home.” She stares you down, daring you to argue with her, but you don’t. You know better than to argue with Joyce Byers. 

Once Jonathan has his keys, you say goodbye to everyone and wish them a merry Christmas. Jonathan throws your bike in his trunk and soon you’re off on the road. The drive is quiet but cozy. The snowflakes fall in a pretty spiral and there’s a soft song playing on the radio. 

Sometimes, if you close your eyes, you can pretend that the events from last month never happened. Will never disappeared. You never discovered that you love Jonathan. Nancy Wheeler never became friends with Jonathan, possibly something more had there been more time. When you close your eyes and sit still, you can imagine that your brother never has nightmares that wake him up screaming. That your heart doesn’t hurt when you make your best friend laugh. 

For a moment, you can forget. 

“Can we always stay like this?” You ask Jonathan softly, almost as if you’ll disturb the peace that winter has brought with its quiet snow. 

“Like what?”

You’re not sure how to express what you’re feeling. “This, us. Together.”

“Of course we’ll always stay like this.” He grabs your hand, bringing it to his lips to kiss it. He says this like it’s a fact, the most obvious thing in the world. 

“Pinky promise me.” You hold your pinky up. You know it’s silly, but you need him to hear you, to understand what you’re saying.

Jonathan looks over at you. “Y/N–”

“Please, promise me, bee.”

He’s silent for a moment, seeming to understand the weight of everything between, around, and within the two of you. Then, he extends his pinky finger and wraps it around yours. “I promise, bug.” 

And you believe him.

[END OF SEASON 1]

-

⌑ series masterlist

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taglist: @siriuslysmoking @sheisjoeschateau @myeclispedsun @innercreationflower @juhdoche @frostandflamesfanfic @goosy-goose @quinnsadilla @munsons-queen @stefansring

[altcvnningham]

hungry

william "case" calderon x f!reader x adler

summary: messy drabble inspired by this ask, where i can absolutely imagine a threeway with case and adler <3

tags/cw: nsfw, mdni, fem!reader, dubcon (at first), threesome, oral (giving and receiving), groping mention, light spitroasting, established case x reader, case 'shares' reader, adler is a sicko who hates seeing other bitches have what he wants, copious use of the word "pretty" wc: 1k

a/n: a snippet i might write more to if i can be bothered. unedited, messy, and sloppy as the head i'm gonna give them both. i just needed to get this idea out of my mind before it drove me insane. i still feel shy posting smut and i only had enough steam for just a drabble so sorry if it's uhhhhh not good,,,

It’s like being pulled in two completely different directions- greedy hands groping in all places, guttural grunting against your ear and into your neck, cornered by two wild animals, rabid and snarling. By no means are they ignorant of your needs, but it does get lost in the white haze of bliss as they both selfishly chase their own pleasure into you.

Hungry, is the only word that comes to mind when you let them take you, share you, like a wounded lamb torn between two wolves; the glint in Case’s eye evident of some faraway fantasy of his being fulfilled as he watches you get ruined by somebody else, someone with hands just as dirty- if not dirtier- as his; the foggy look in Adler’s indicative of a kind of possessiveness that you could practically feel burning into you whenever he glowered at you across a room, worse whenever you were with Case. Always a wretched dog, starving for what isn’t his. Never liking to seeing someone with a shiny toy he isn’t allowed to sink his teeth into. It was all inevitable, that it would happen like this. Only really a matter of when.

You’re wide-eyed and helpless when Case presses you down into the mattress, a firm hand on your tummy, pinning you like a moth as your legs kick and flail around his hips. Your head spills back so sweetly when you hear Adler’s heavy footsteps behind you- or, at least Case thinks so, his pretty girl- hair dangling in tangled tresses off the edge of the bed as you watch, upside-down, as Adler leisurely saunters over to you, unbuckling his belt.

The image of yourself laid bare upon the bed reflects in his glasses, your own doe-eyed expression mocking you with your shameless submission. You catch the flit of a smirk tug at Adler’s mouth as he tilts his head down at you. You don’t need to see his eyes to know he’s looking at you- like, really looking at you, raking down your figure and eating this picture of you up, not knowing if this first time seeing you this way might also be the last. Case is being such a good sport, sharing you like this. Adler wouldn’t want it to go to waste rushing himself, being unappreciative. You’re just too pretty- he’s wondered what you’d look like under those clothes for weeks.

You see in that same reflection Case’s body close over yours, mouthing over your breasts, down your abdomen, kissing- ow, biting- between your thighs, before he takes your legs and slings them limply over his shoulders. You go to crane your neck back down to watch as he pushes his face into your cunt but Adler’s hand from behind you finds its way down the column of your throat, uncharacteristically careful as he coaxes your head back, and tucks his thumb under your jaw to turn your face to the side. You gaze upward, so sweet and silly as your mouth parts in shock, hearing the sound of him smacking his cock against your hollowed cheek before you see him doing it- if you had any protest at all it’d go unheard with how he tuts at you anyway, so condescending when he nudges the head against your pouting lips and crooning about how that mouth’s too pretty not to take it for me, sweetheart.

You cry out as Case’s tongue licks a thick, languid stripe over your clit, and Adler uses your gasping mouth to push his cock inside. You’d already been drooling nonsense when they’d groped you in the hallway, bullying you into pliant submission, all your babbling please don’t and someone will hear and you’re being too rough only serving to make your mouth nice and hot and wet for when he fucks it. And he groans, so appreciative of you, of that pretty mouth your girl’s got, Case, and he fucks it slow, just to show you how much he likes it. Savouring every inch he feeds you, that your tongue curls up eagerly to taste. The thick intrusion, nearly too much to bear, has you gagging almost immediately, reflexively jerking your head back to breathe, but Adler’s hand slides into your hair and keeps you still, steady, insisting it’s easier that way. Relax, he murmurs dryly. You barely hear him over the sound of Case’s starved moaning as he eats you out.

But when Case gets too impatient, his own need stifling, he clambers over you, slots himself between your thighs clumsily, jostling you around enough to push your throat up further on Adler’s length; it hits the back of your throat with a shrill cry and you all but weep when Case slides into you, trembling hands grasping his shoulders as he fills you to the hilt in one careless thrust.

Between your pathetic noises you hear Adler laugh, a snide and condescending chuckle as his hand brushes your hair back from your face, mutterings of how precious you look taking it all so well. You never thought you’d feel so enamoured by his praise, when it’s uttered so mockingly. So different from Case’s, who gasps between sucking your tits, that you’re so perfect, baby, so fucking sweet. A swell of pride as you slacken your throat, earning a broken moan from Adler when you swallow him deeper. Doesn’t much matter that you choke and gag and spring tears to your eyes at the pressure- somehow even the asphyxiation feels like a reward, evidence of your effort. Case is slack-jawed as he fucks you, slow and languid, airy and mindless with eyes fixed on your sweat-sodden face as you take Adler so willingly, so obedient. In his delirium, hypnotised at the sight of you blissed out and skewered between them both, he draws a thumb up to stroke your cheek, to feel where Adler stuffs the hollow of it.

Perfect girl.

[aurik-kal-durin]

How my obsession with shipping spoiled Avatar: The Last Airbender for me.

I'm an OG Avatar fan. I watched the show when it first aired in February of 2005. I was 15 years old.

Right away, I knew Aang and Katara were gonna be a thing. It was so obvious, and it only became more obvious as Season 1 went on. More so in Season 2 and Season 3. The show never let you forget about it, as even outside of overtly Kataang-centric episodes like The Fortuneteller and The Cave of Two Lovers, they kept bringing it up in some form or another.

Unfortunately, Zutara was a thing, and they never shut up about it. Despite all evidence to the contrary, they insisted up and down that Zuko and Katara were meant to be together. I was a Zutara shipper for a short time, and I admit that I thought it would be canon too in the weeks leading up to Crossroads of Destiny. After the Season 2 finale, I went with the flow, and sided with Kataang... and that's where the problems began to really start.

You see, the Zutara fandom got really toxic right after Season 2 ended. Kataang fans like myself didn't appreciate it, and before I knew it... watching Avatar: The Last Airbender was no longer about just enjoying the show. It was about winning. Just so we could gloat when Zutara inevitably lost.

I could no longer just watch the show and relax. I was on the edge of my seat during each episode, keeping a sharp eye out for the slightest hint of Kataang, and spent the weeks between each episode arguing with strangers online about shipping, trying to convince a brick wall that it was not made of steel... if you will indulge me the metaphor.

In short, shipping wars sucked all the joy of watching Avatar: The Last Airbender. By engaging in shipping wars with rabid Zutarians, I kind of ruined the show for myself. Not entirely my fault, because the Zutara fans back then were easily-triggered bullies who just would not stop, which made it hard to ignore them... but nonetheless, I feel like all of us should've ignored them. Their ship was never going to be canon, everyone knew it after Crossroads of Destiny. All except for this toxic vocal minority whose enjoyment of the show hinged on whether or not their ship became canon.

Unfortunately, some Kataangers (such as myself) got so upset about it (and so obsessed with it) that our enjoyment of the show also hinged on our ship being canon.

How bad was it? Bad enough that I can no longer call Avatar: The Last Airbender my favorite show of all time. Why? Because the experience of watching it the first time was STRESSFUL. So stressful, in fact, that I usually can't go back and watch it again.

Compare that to other shows I've watched... like Hilda, on Netflix. That was a very relaxing show to watch the first time around, and because of that I feel like I can go back and watch it whenever. But Avatar, sadly, only brings back memories of stress and anxiety... stemming from an unhealthy obsession with something stupid.

P.S. Why the hell did we ever call it "Kataang"? Who is the IDIOT that came up with that name? I always thought that was a stupid name for our ship. Why not "Aangtara" or "Kataraang"?

[exit-path]

Hey, remember this video? This is how tumblr made the Undertale “Stronger than You” parody.

Hi guys! Before we start, some of you on tumblr may have been in the Undertale fandom in 2015 when this was taking place, but I wasn't. So if you were at the devil's sacrament, then reblog with what you remember! I'd love to hear primary source perspectives of events.

(EDIT, 5/6/23: SO @galxie JUST PROPOSED TO ADAPT THIS POST INTO A YOUTUBE VIDEO. I'M NOT EVEN KIDDING)

(SO IF YOU'RE GOING TO SHARE YOUR STORIES THEN GET IT IN NOW)

But without further ado, let's begin, and watch as ordinary people made Internet history. (under the cut)

Part 1: gymleadercheren

It all started when @gymleadercheren drew a snippet of the Sans fight, with some Steven Universe lyrics underneath. This post caught the eye of @thepinkestpug, who had an idea.

Part 2: thepinkestpug

Later that same day—Oct 10, 2015—thepinkestpug sang a parody. Now, her Soundcloud link… how do I say it… doesn't sound very good? (He calls it "poor quality" herself.) But because he was in both the UT and SU fandoms, she was uniquely qualified to come up with these lyrics.

Upon seeing the "Stronger Than You" parody, gymleadercheren was ECSTATIC that she inspired someone with her post. The next day, she asked thepinkestpug for "permission to smoosh our lyrics together and make a comic?” If you've seen djsmell's video, you may recognize what she made next…

Part 3: The Comic

It took 3 weeks, but on Oct 29, 2015, gymleadercheren finally finished her comic. With 38 PANELS in total, the post was an instant success. She credits thepinkestpug for her lyrics, and links to an 8-bit "Stronger Than You" instrumental. Today, the post has over 20k notes.

Part 4: djsmell

Two days later, on Oct 31, 2015, @djsmell made a song cover of the comic. He NAILED the voice of Sans, and used the 8-bit song cover from gymleadercheren's post. He posted about it on his blog, while his YouTube video now has 11M views.

Part 5: alfa995

It wasn't until nearly 2 months later that on Dec 21, 2015, @alfa995 finally finished his animation. It used djsmell's audio, and filled in the gaps where the comic made you use your imagination. Today, the YouTube video has been viewed nearly 80 MILLION times.

These were alfa995's words about everything that had happened so far: "So basically someone… made lyrics for an Undertale version of [a song from Steven Universe] and a comic based off it, then someone else sung it, and now I animated it. I love the Internet."

Part 6: Reflections

And that’s the history of this video! This singular video has grown in popularity to such immense heights, it's a well-known piece of trivia that more people recognize the Undertale “Stronger Than You” parody than the actual Steven Universe song it’s based off of.

What I find interesting is how each person involved in this process had a tumblr blog. They saw each other’s posts and made more posts based off of them. By fandom standards this happened LIGHTNING FAST, the idea took 2 and a half months from conception to completion. It’s this connectivity that created the 4th most-viewed Undertale video.

The Undertale scene on tumblr spawned many more memorable fan creations, such as the “Underpants” series by SrPelo, which became the entry point for many into the wonder that is his animations.

It is this fandom that made Undertale a goliath of Internet culture. It is this fandom that made it so that Toby Fox will always have a loyal, rabid audience. Say what you want about it, whether you love it or hate it, the Undertale scene on tumblr may never happen again.

Thank you for reading, and I hope that you enjoyed!

This was my first time thinking about the Undertale fandom in a LONG time, and it was a nice trip down memory lane. Also, here’s a few things I found while researching that I couldn’t list above:

First, what's with all these "Stronger Than You" versions? I had no idea until I started researching that there were so many spinoffs of this singular video. Like, there's a CHARA response? There's a FRISK RESPONSE? THERE'S A TRIO VERSION?

And speaking of spinoffs, I want to shout out the video "Richer Than You"—absolutely phenomenal YTPMV that had a lot of effort put into it.

Finally, I want to shout out Super Eyepatch Wolf’s video, as it was my inspiration while writing this, and explains: “why did these videos get so popular?”

[wannab-urs]

The Spreadsheet Digest - Vol 18

Hi friends!! I have 19 absolutely fantastic fics for you this week.

There are so fucking many incredible fics coming out every day in this fandom and I cannot possibly keep up with them all. I am in constant awe of the Pedro fandom and the gorgeous work that comes out of it at a frankly alarming rate.

If you if you're tagging me in stuff and I'm not interacting with it, just know it's on my list and I'll get there eventually <3

As always you can peruse my Spreadsheet here and you can find all my previous fic rec lists here.

Recs below the absolutely stunning photo of our collective husband

a lover's pinch - a joel series by @hier--soir

I love a fuck first, feelings later situation. I love it even more when you have a super fucking hot bathroom fuck with an older man and he ends up being your PROFESSOR!!! God this was fantastic. I really love the way they can't stay away from each other. That one thing that happens in part two, you know the one, had me barking like a rabid dog. This is hot. And it's beautifully written. I'm excited for the feelings to come in.

Mr. Miller - a joel series by @tremendum

I read the first installment of this fic a while ago, I'm assuming before I made the spreadsheet because it wasn't on here. Picked it back up this week and oh my god. Joel is mean, emotionally constipated, a little stupid. Reader is also mean, emotionally constipated, and a little stupid. The way these two crash into each other, a little violent, a lot desperate... it's gorgeous and devastating. I could read about these two forever

Revenge - a Dave York one shot by @toomanystoriessolittletime

Forced cucking is hot idgaf. In this one, your husband is a blatant and unrepentant cheater and his boss helps you get back at him. Dave is sexy and menacing in this. There's subtle hints to his darker side, but it's never directed at you. He takes care of you in a way your husband never has and makes your husband watch the whole thing -- without anything more than his words btw. Husband isn't tied down, he's just terrified.

I know it when I see it - a Joel series by @bageldaddy

Pornstar!joel, pornstar!reader, set in the 70s (? nixon?) the fucking golden age of porn. This isn't your usual "aspiring porn actress fucks big bad joel miller and gets hooked" fic, even though it is that kind of fic. It's a really fresh take, with some really fucking good emotional dynamics and shit going on. The smut is filthy, dirty, gorgeous, delicious, perfect -- but the emotional grit in there with it? The struggles that both reader and Joel are experiencing and the way they're navigating (or failing to navigate) them? Stunning. I'm so invested in this series

Yes, Chef - a Joel series by @sempersirens

Mean.... secretly soft.... Joel. I love this! It's a Chef!Joel AU and the reader is a chef in his kitchen. They start secretly hooking up. I love the way this is written so much??? The angst is so good also. I cannot wait to read more of this.

The Layover - a Frankie series by @goodwithcheese

This fic, man. God damn. Reader kept pissing me off (this is a compliment, btw, i love it when reader makes me feel things) because of all her hang ups with Frankie. Frankie is so perfect. He's soft, caring, sweet. He's worked on his trauma and come such a long way and he's such a good dad. Reader is a wonderful mom and I see where she's coming from with all of her decisions even if they make me SCREAM. And the reason it makes me scream when she pushes Frankie away is because when they meet in the middle? When they get all tangled up in each other after days or weeks of staying away? It's stunning, mind blowing, earth shattering. I don't know how anyone could resist

The House - a Jack series by @gemmahale

Okay I kinda fucked up and only read the first chapter of this series because I have ADHD and I had to go do something and then I never went back. BUT seeing it on my list just reminded me how fucking excited I am to read this. The first chapter sets up such a good story. I love the suspense... Why does statesman give a fuck about her dad's land? How does she know Jack? How well does she know Jack? AHHHH what is going ON???? I'm immediately reading more of this after posting the digest bc oh my god???

Common Grounds - a Marcus Pike series by @whataperfectwasteoftime

I am, as usual, absolutely in love with the way Penny writes Marcus. I love love love reader's backstory and that she's an artist. I loved her kind of pining for him while he waited for Teresa and I adored everything after she dumps him. I just... AH. And like... in this one... he has this darker undertone? Some of that inner turmoil jumping out maybe idk, but it made the smut gorgeous. I was in awe, for real. He's so gentle and sweet with reader in the coffee shop and on their dates and stuff and then he just kind of snaps, but even then there's like a feeling that he's restraining himself? It's unbelievably hot. No one does Dom Marcus quite like Penny... got me fuckin droolin got DAMN

Friendly Competition - a TF boys (no Tom, and mostly Frankie) one shot by @absurdthirst

This was so hot. Literally reader just gets blindfolded and dicked down by all the boys and Frankie is a sex god. Perfect. And there's some really cute feelings in there too. There's more installments to this as well and they are just as fucking lovely. I loved the plot twist in the second one -- was not expecting that. God absurdthirst really is out here writing down all my fantasies....

Go ahead and cry little girl - aJack one shot by @xdaddysprincessxx

Okay obviously I love this because Reader is called Agent Gin... but also reader does a little sex work on the side and she accidentally sends a lil somethin somethin to Jack and he goes all Daddy on her and it is SO FuCKING HoT OH MY GOd

Eat - a Joel one shot by @notjustjavierpena

Men suck, usually, and won't put in the effort to make you cum with their mouth. And this is why reader doesn't really ever ask for it or even want it.. it's a waste of time. Oh but our lovely dbf!Joel proves her so very wrong in this fic. Joel is so soft and sweet and sexy in this UGH

The right wrong number - a Joel one shot by @proxima-writes

I read more than one wrong number fic this week lol. Anyway this was SO hot. Joel is a dirty talking god in this. and then the like slow build up with the soccer coach? The way they are so totally dancing around flirting with each other and Sarah is egging it on and then by pure chance they find out.... HE was the dirty talking dom with the gorgeous cock? Excellent. This is so good UGH. I want a part two in that sex club.

Gotta Start With a Good Foundation - a Joel one shot by @bonezone44

This is a part of a series called Sacred Spaces where Reader and Joel talk to each other, no actual smut, and.... just give it a read. I love these so much. This one is kind of a dom/sub relationship negotiation thing and it's gorgeous

In Every Lifetime - an Ezra series by @xdaddysprincessxx

Witch!Reader and Demon!Ezra!!!! I love this. I love the setting. The mysterious spell book. The ritual. I'm so excited to see where this goes. Demon Ezra is sexy omg

Late Night Texts - a Javi P series by @undercoverpena

SOFT JAVI ALERT!!!! Set after the events of season 3, Javi is back in Laredo and he's lonely. Then he gets a text from a wrong number and subsequently racks up the biggest phone bill the year 2000 has ever seen. This fic is soft and sweet and flirty and adorable with a touch of angst (long distance things). The smut is sequestered in bonus scenes if you want to skip it, but it's so worth reading. It's so good. I love this fic AHHHH

Bad Idea, Right - a Dieter one shot by @proxima-writes

Yes, hooking up with your ex is usually a bad idea. Especially when it's Dieter Bravo. But I sure as shit wouldn't say no. Guys.... Proxima made the motherfucker CRAWL. If my ex dieter is crawling across the floor to eat me out... who am i to say no. Seems like a great idea actually. Also they're both still clearly down bad for each other and we love that.

Hard Work Gets Rewarded - a Joel and his crew one shot by @walkintotheriveranddisappear

This is like... if you looked at my search history -- if I had one ;) -- you would find this. Straight out of my depraved fantasies you've got contractor!Joel and his very sexy crew giving you the fuck of a lifetime. We got a little breeding kink, a little DVP, a little cum on every part of your body, situation. This is... so hot.

like rabbits blinded by the light - a Joel one shot by @walkintotheriveranddisappear

Yeah so I read a depraved smut fantasy and then jumped on over to this. This is stunning, emotional. it has depth. I love the way Joel finds her and I love the way they stick together and I love the ending. This is sad and sweet, a little painful, very human. I loved it

the world tipped on its side - a Frankie series by @idolatrybarbie

Chronic pain havers -- you will love this one!! Reader has chronic pain from an injury. I'm two chapters in and I'm hooked. There's a lot of trauma and fucked up shit swirling around in both reader and Frankie's heads and it's just under the surface as of chapter two. I love the set up here -- stunt coordinator!reader and stunt pilot!Frankie -- it's really interesting and not something I've read before. (i think i did read a stunt pilot!Frankie / actor!reader / actor!Dieter thing once though lemme know if y'all want that link). Bea writes beautifully and I'm so excited for more of this series.

---------------------- oldies but goodies -------------------------

Wanna bet?, Lingerie, Morning, Afternoon, and Evening - Dieter one shots by @write-and-buried

I'm being so for real right now Every Single Fic by @prolix-yuy - I have almost her entire masterlist on my spreadsheet and this seemed easier than linking them all.

And the same for like everything by @ezrasbirdie, I have so many of their fics on my list.

---------------- my fics --------------------

My most recent fic is This Night Has Opened My Eyes - a Javi P one shot.

--- I have written for Joel, Frankie, Ezra, Javi P, Mr. Ben, Veracruz, Max Phillips, and my darling boy Dieter, you can find those here

-----------------------------------------------

Happy Reading!

[sissytobitch10seconds]

i'll be the blood if you'll be the bone (i'm giving you all)

Fandom: Grishaverse: Six of Crows and Shadow and Bone Summary: Kaz has asked to speak with them in his office, and neither Inej nor Jesper can imagine what they've done to warrant that kind of seriousness. Warnings: Mentions of touch-aversion, mentions of Inej Ghafa's backstory, and awkward love confessions Word Count: 3,565 Ship(s): Jesper Fahey/Inej Ghafa/Kaz Brekker

Archive link!

A/N: I had originally written this based entirely off the show, but when I read the books I wanted to go back and change it. I know a lot more about the characters and their backstories since Leigh was able to finish her entire story instead of Netflix just deciding that they didn't wanna, so I figured that this would be better. I hope you all enjoy! Stay sissy and bitchy everyone <3

It was well known amongst everyone on the streets of the Barrel that Inej and Jesper belonged to Kaz.

None of them would ever use that word to describe the relationship that they had, but it had been tossed out amongst the bigger gangs and even within their own. The Dregs knew the way that Haskel’s Rabid Dog felt about human ownership and would never dare to imply that he participated in that to his face. They simply whispered it behind their hands or into their mugs, obfuscating the words enough that his spider would be unable to hear them if she was nearby. Secrets in the Barrel never went far without coming across the Wraith, and nothing that she knew ever went longer than a week before it got back to Kaz.

While being in a gang was nothing like the Grisha slave trade or the prostitution along the Stave, it was similar enough to warrant some amount of metaphor. They had the brand of who they had to answer to in ink on their arms, the voice of the man that they took orders from always ringing in their heads, and their entire livelihoods and bodies were controlled by the person that they had vowed themselves to. The difference was that they had chosen to go to Haskell, in the case of the Dregs, when they were poor or down on their luck or running from something that warranted the protection of people around them. Slaves and Grisha didn’t have that choice when they were in Ketterdam, so they were always careful when they chose to use that metaphor around Inej especially.

The ownership of the Dregs went to Per Haskell, since he was the leader. There was rumor of a time when those at the bottom of the Barrel had been owned by someone else, when they had been following the orders of a big man with one eye and a jawline held on by nothing more than some Grisha-made glue. The old men in the gang talked about it sometime, when they were sour that they had to take orders from someone that had just a touch more seniority than them in the gang. None of the younger members, the ones that Kaz had dragged out of the harbor and out of gambling dens, remembered that time. Ownership had always belonged to Haskell, he was the leader.

Other than Inej and Jesper. The two never looked to Haskell when they were getting their orders, dark brown and gray eyes always straying to the rabid hound on his other side. On the occasion that they did get orders from the true leader of the gang, it would be a countdown to see how long it took them to get from Haskell’s office on the first floor up to the attic where Kza had made his own office/bedroom. He gave them orders, he protected them better than the rest of the gang, he even stood closer to them than he did any other human with breath in their lungs.

That was why no one batted an eye when he made his way down the stairs and then called the duo to follow him. At least, it was a surprise to no one but Inej and Jesper.

To the outside eye they looked as loyal to Kaz as everyone else was to Haskell, or even more so. It wasn’t strange for someone to turn into a loyal puppy for the person that had given them a second chance at life in the Barrel, it was why so many people risked their lives for something as stupid as a shipment of jurda or a property location along the most profitable part of the Barrel. Inside of the group, they knew better.

They had a strange dynamic with the boy, but it went far deeper than simply being loyal to him for saving them. Jesper knew that he was the worst at hiding it, the longing looks and brushes of clothing and desperate pleas for attention. Inej was much better, worming her way under his skin so that Kaz had to carry her around like a parasitic bug from across the ocean. They were both deeply in love with Kaz and had forced a friendship in their desperation to be near him, which was why they spent so much time with him.

The moment that they heard the knocking of a cane and heavy boots along the stairs, the conversation that they were having with Pim and Big Bolliger quieted down so that they could pay more attention to their boss. Jesper was sitting in the high-backed chair in the part of the shared living space that was nearest to the water-logged books that they kept around for decoration and dramatic kindling. Inej was on top of the bookshelf that the chair was next to, her legs folded so that her ankles were resting atop Jesper’s shoulders. He didn’t mind since her slippers were light and she kept most of her weight leaned back so the furniture wouldn’t topple.

The entire room went silent when Kaz emerged from the dark depths of the stairwell and looked over them all. It was imposing to see him shrowded in shadows with his heavy woolen overcoat hanging off of his body, hat perched just barely over those stormy brown eyes. “Inej, Jesper. I want to see you in my office when I get back. Twenty minutes,” he rasped.

Neither of them said anything as they watched him make his way over the wooden floor and out of the door, into the raining streets. It was a day where he was going to check in at the Crow Club, to make sure that the small games they could run there currently were going well. They had been renovating the place for what felt like an age but in reality had only been a couple of months. Apparently when Kaz had found it, after securing enough money for them to be able to do anything, it had been decorated in the usual gaudy Barrel flash. Jesper happened to like all the colors and patterns clashing with each other because it reminded him in some ways of his home.

Inej and Jesper shared a look with each other before they began to remove themselves from where they were sitting. The moment that the door of the Slat had swung shut everyone had returned to their conversations, so it was only the two Dregs in front of him that were privy to what the duo was doing. “Where are you going? He said twenty minutes, that means you’ve got at least fifteen to talk to us before you have to be up there,” Pim complained.

“Kaz said twenty as a generous estimate. It takes him about two minutes to get down to the Crow Club when he’s in a rush since people just move out of the way for him and it’ll only take him a minute there if he thinks that everything is going well. We have twenty minutes if he has to fix something,” Inej replied curtly. It was a half truth that no one other than her was ever going to be able to make sure of. She was the only one that could follow where Kaz was going without getting in trouble, not even Jesper could properly get away with that.

There was a sigh of discontent from Big Bolliger but neither of the other Dregs said anything. Inej and Jesper quickly made their way through the main floor of the Slat and into the rickety, shadowy stairwell that Kaz had emerged from. They were quiet as they climbed through the first and second floor, only speaking once they had emerged into the office that they had been told to wait in. What they were going to say to each other was extremely private and while Kaz had renovated the Slat first, the walls were still very thin and everyone they lived with was very nosey.

“What do you think he’s going to talk to us about?” Jesper asked as soon as the heavy wooden door had clicked shut.

“I think you know, Jesper,” Inej replied. She walked through the long attic room to the little bench next to the window. Jesper hadn’t been working with the Dregs for as long as Inej had, but he was certain that Kaz had put that there just for her. He wasn’t the type of person to sit next to a window and look forlornly out at the city that had wronged him or not given him what he desired, nor did he need the street lamps for light since he had plenty of money for his own.

“I don’t, that’s why I asked,” Jesper replied. He looked back at the door and then towards Inej, before he followed after her. She opened the window and then sat on the ledge with her feet dangling against the outside wall. The lip of the roof was just big enough that it prevented her from being soaked by the seaside downpour that they were experiencing. He sat on the bench next to her, his hand traveling the smooth wood of the sill before it connected with her fingers.

“This,” she said as she held their joint hands up so that they were both looking at it. “Jes, we’ve only really been together for about a month and he’s already going to be upset with us when he comes back.”

“I thought that we agreed that we weren’t going to let Kaz scare us out of being with each other when this whole thing started,” Jesper said, a bit defensive. He remembered being in love with Kaz since he was brought into the Dregs and in his opinion it was far past time for him to move on. He had pined after the brooding leader of their micro-gang for long enough, he had to let his heart lead him to something that might actually make him happy.

Inej let out a sigh and turned her face towards the rooftops of Ketterdam. Jesper knew that she would much rather have stayed in Ravka with the family that she had always known, traveling around as an acrobat on the trails that had been worn by her ancestors. He also knew that what she had gone through in the Menagerie had changed her enough that she was another jigsaw piece that belonged to the city and if she was removed from it then she would never be able to fit anywhere else quite as well as she did here. He was the same way, which was why they had tumbled into each other so easily.

“I did say that,” she whispered.

“So why are you acting like Kaz has any right to get involved in our personal business? We’re together just like Anika and Joola were together and it’s none of his business,” Jesper said. He knew that wasn’t really true. Everything that they did would end up being Kaz’s business in one way or another. He was everything that they were and more, after all. It was going to be impossible to disentangle him from their lives, let alone the messy little relationship that had formed between himself and Inej.

“It’s always been him,” Inej whispered.

“I know,” Jesper replied. He leaned forward and placed his forehead on her arm to get a bit more comfort that he knew wouldn’t trigger her into a panic attack. The first week of their relationship had almost ended it and their friendship, back before Jesper had begun to learn her tells. Now he could figure out when the best time to cozy up to her was and when the best time to step back and give her space was. He also made sure to telegraph his movements long before he did them and to not press anything if she looked even a little bit uncomfortable.

She leaned her head to the side so that her cheek was resting on his fluffy coils, reminding Jesper that he had to find someone who could work with Zemini hair so that they could do something about it. Inej let out a long-suffering sigh. “I never thought that I was going to have love, when he broke me out. I thought that I was going to spend my entire day being raped by men who paid a woman that had kidnapped me from my home. But then he never tried to make me do something with my body that I didn’t want to. I could suggest alternatives and we could talk about it, which was something I never even had with my parents. It’s hard not to fall in love with the first person that respects that you’re a whole entire person.

“I respected you as a whole person,” Jesper pouted. He hadn’t been able to figure out the touch-aversion thing as quickly as Kaz, someone who went out of his way to never touch anyone else, had. He regretted it deeply and often sat up thinking about the moments where he had likely triggered Inej back to the horrid place that she had been stolen to.

“I know that Kaz is… different than everyone else,” she whispered. “I’m fully aware of the fact that chasing after his approval, whether that’s verbal affirmation or romantic entanglements aside, is a futile effort. I had always hoped that the more layers I unwound the more I would be able to read him, and then something might happen. But it never did.”

“Are you saying that you settled for me?” Jesper asked, mostly teasing but also asking.

She laughed, remembering the way that her father used to say the  same thing to her mother when they were cuddled around the campfire, long after she was meant to be asleep. She parroted her mother, the woman speaking through her mouth though it was her voice. “The heart is not as fickle as some may think. It can love none or it can love many, mine loves many.”

“I know,” Jesper smiled properly at her. “May I kiss your cheek?”

She opened her mouth to answer but then scrambled into the window. “Not at the moment, Kaz is coming.”

They flung themselves away from each other so that they were standing in front of Kaz’s desk at a reasonable yard away from each other. If they were going to be scolded for being in a relationship, though it hadn’t yet affected any of the missions that Kaz had sent them on, then it would be best not to give him another example the moment that he entered.

The door to the office swung open and then clicked shut as the very man that they had been speaking about walked in. “Everything go okay at the club, boss?” Jesper asked. He flicked his heavy overcoat, donned to keep the chill of the bottom floor of the Slat away but never taken off, to the side so that he could run his thumb over the mother-of-pearl handles of his revolver.

“Yes, in fact,” Kaz replied, his voice rasping less than when he had left. It was never going to not be that way, Inej knew because she had talked with Kaz for hours and it had changed but not enough to be considered smooth before it went downhill again. “I wished to speak with you both about something, if you have the time.”

“You haven’t told us to do anything else, so all we have is time,” Jesper replied as he flashed a smile at Kaz.

The other boy didn’t do or say anything about that as he sank down into the chair behind his makeshift desk. He slid some of the mortgage papers and ledgers over to the side so that he could thread his fingers together on top of the wood. “I have noticed the two of you have grown closer within the last month. I wanted to ask if… perhaps, the two of you were in a relationship,” he said.

As he spoke, the words sounded strange and oddly tacky in his mother. Jesper and Inej had heard him say plenty of weird things when he was in disguise while they were out on a heist or another sort of mission, but never in his own timber and clothes. They glanced at each other before Inej said, “We are. Do you have a problem with that?”

“No, no problem,” he said a little too quickly. No one in the room missed the way that his eye flicked upwards in a poorly hidden wince while he leaned back in his chair. “I was simply wondering something.”

“Spit it out, boss. You’re going to give one of us a heart attack,” Jesper said. He wasn’t entirely lying about that because he could feel his heart beating rapidly up in his ears.

“I want to join.”

“I’m sorry?” Jesper and Inej said at the same time. Her heart rate had jumped to a million miles a minute when he had said that while Jesper’s stopped and then started again. They glanced at each other before they both turned back to their boss.

Kaz, the Bastard of the Barrel, had red coloring the edges of his cheeks and ears. He had tilted his hands in such a way that the majority of his face was hidden, but it was clear from the way that his shoulders were held that he was embarrassed of the request. “I wanted to enter into your relationship, like polyamory.”

Little was known about the Suli people outside of Ravka, and even then it was sparse information that was likely wrong. Inej knew that polyamory was typical when people were traveling from town to town and got bored of being trapped with one singular partner. She also knew that for Jesper, polyamory was entirely normal because it was easier to homestead on the frontier with up to five adults instead of only two and a hoard of children. Polyamory in Ketterdam, on the other hand, was considered very taboo. None of them really cared about what society thought of them, not when they were the Dregs of the Barrel.

“Are you certain?” Inej asked.

“This was a bad idea. Get out of my office. If either of you breathe a word of this to anyone else I’ll make sure that your bodies are on the Reaper’s Barge faster than you can sneeze,” Kaz said in a rush as he got up from the desk and pointed towards the door.

“Boss, wait a second!” Jesper objected. “We weren’t saying that we thought it was weird for you to want to join our relationship or making fun of you or anything like that! I think that Inej and I were both just shocked that you wanted to in general. We’ve both been in love with you for months if not years and nothing that we ever did seemed to clue you into that fact.”

All the words tumbled from him in a great rush, like if they weren’t spoke in that exact moment then they would never have another chance to be in the open air. Kaz listened to him with wide, dangerous black eyes before he sat heavily back down in his seat. “I suppose that makes sense.”

“Kaz, we do very much want to date you. And we are together,” Inej said. She offered her hand out to him like Jesper had done for her when they had gotten together a month ago.

He looked down at her fingers and then up at her. Finally, he said, “I cannot touch you. It’s not that I don’t want to, because I do. But I can’t. You’re just going to have to trust me on that for a while, because I don’t have the words or the guts to explain that. If you believe that I can love you without touching you, then I would be honored for you to be mine and I to be yours.”

“We already are,” Jesper grinned. “Pretty sure most of the people that try to knock our teeth out think that you have your own gang instead of running Haskell’s.”

“Well that’s because they’re stupid,” Kaz grumbled behind his gloved hands.

Inej spoke next, stopping them from derailing the topic. “Polyamory is normal in my culture, but I know from that that it takes a lot of work. I think that we can love you without needing to touch you because that need is fulfilled by another person. That is the entire purpose of non-monogamy, to have people that can fulfill all your needs without having to put that pressure on one person. So we will continue to show you that we love you by going to you first, by taking care of you, and by annoying the Saints out of you.”

“You can count on that,” Jesper grinned.

Kaz smiled at them, small and shy. They had only ever seen him grin when he had come up with something particularly devious or intelligent, and at that point it had looked like something carved into a gourd around the Autumn in Novyi Zem. This was something precious and delicate, something that they got to share with him and no one else ever would.

[danwhobrowses]

One Piece Chapter 1128 - Initial Thoughts

And we are back

(sadly no lego movie gifs this time I looked for one but it wasn't what I was after)

A week break that continues to feel forever long has ended, and One Piece once more leapfrogs another new age manga past its end - I wasn't too familiar with JJK but it is a testament to One Piece's longevity that it has outlasted all of the 'new big 3' lineups fans try to push.

Regardless, we're still in lego, with a mixed bag of outfits and a lot of questions, let's get to it!

Spoilers for the Chapter, Support the Official Release too

Colorspread seems to be broomsticks (well, bamboo mops as broomsticks) and school outfits, Franky's kitted his broom out and Jinbe and Zoro are chilling on a dragon

But schoolgirl outfit Nico Robin...Oda please

The chapter title being RPG does seem to imply answers (also since I watch CR and TLOVM - S3's first 3 eps were great, second one chock full of easter eggs - it's like a convergence)

Already starting off with a laugh as Sanji, Nami in his arms, notes 'too many dudes around to be a dream' XD

Nami he used a super sentai invisibility suit to sneak into a bathhouse I'm pretty sure you know what kind of dreams he's having

Does he need to sleep with blood bags I wonder?

They hop off the Big Steinn Castle, which continues to collapse

Down below, Usopp, Luffy and Zoro and his awful eye mask discuss how they met up; Zoro was on the other side of town and spotted Luffy fighting the 'Ear God'

Luffy seemed confident that Usopp could've beaten the cat-lion, but Usopp laments that he 'lost his cool'

It's time for the detective hats to come on

Usopp notes that they're in giants outfits, but they're sized to them which seems inconsistent, Nami wonders if they were gigantified but also that their surroundings are all lego

The group agree to ask the locals, except Sanji who is using his creepy simp sniff to know that Robin at least is not nearby

Luffy and Usopp jaunt to the town, with Nami still not sure why everyone's excited

Zoro also points out that there's no wind, which yeah that'd be a bit off-putting

Something hops their direction, a big dude riding a giant grasshopper like a motorcycle

Really puts the biker allegory in A Bug's Life on its head

Renowned entomophobes Sanji and Nami immediately back away

The guy is big but not giant sized, he's also the one who maintains the Big Steinn Castle

The cat was called the 'Great Iskat' and the cute hedgehog was the 'Needle God'

He calls it the 'Land of the Gods' as Usopp stops Luffy from blurting that they beat up the Iskat

Hahahaha, he's talking about all the trouble they've caused while they try to play innocent XD

He also warns them not to follow the road, it's filled with rabid guardians and nobody has returned

Nami knows Luffy too well, but before she can finish her sentence Luffy's already running in that direction

Nami at least gives a cutesy look to placate the big guy

Even that stupid eye mask won't stop Zoro from looking feral at the prospect of rabid guardians

But yes Sanji, they do enable each other, much like you enable every woman within a 50 mile radius

Chasing Luffy we catch more Lego scenery

Luffy spots someone else running at them with speed, insisting they'll just dodge them

And runs straight into a glass wall

Seems the locals didn't know where they are, since they see the cracks as the sky breaking

It's an enclosure! Which explains why most of the giant animals are pet animals and everything else is normal sizes

The outside looks more like a giant's room, and a sewing machine

Chopper's here! He was outside the enclosure, apparently he was chained and collared

Nami hugs Chopper, but also insists that he owes her for it, which Usopp claps back given how scared Nami was

Zoro deduces that a giant calling themselves the 'Sun God' must've dressed them, with Usopp admiring the craftsmanship

Luffy also spots the lego blocks, which Sanji noting that the bad smell when cooking the Ear God would've been the smell of melting plastic

Which btw is bad, plastic fumes is very unhealthy

They observe the tinted glass too, seems that's not a normal thing in this world

Sanji has an idea but Nami shuts down his volunteering to clean the women's bathroom on the ship

Zoro is liking the enclosure less and less now, but Usopp takes the positive that at least they can confirm they're on Elbaf

Nami's not sure though, the culprit being a giant doesn't confirm that it's in Elbaf

Chopper wants to reunite with the crew, unsure of where they are

Usopp meanwhile wants to ask the locals, seeing what Luffy says

Luffy agrees, but is kinda busywith the giant snake behind them!

Prime Nami and Usopp scared faces too

There's also giant mice and a giant crow with a skull hat, which are believed to be the 'Rabid Guardians'

A giant is coming though, hearing a ruckus

Look at this dude! Premium level cthonic mage kinda design love it!

The 'Sun God' is surprised to see the gap under the door is on fire, overhearing the crew argue about Luffy going overkill

Seems he busted the furnace, causing a fire

'Sun God' meet Sun God

Usopp tells the group to run, but Luffy and Zoro are still wrapping up

Zoro takes out the crow, Muginn, and Luffy takes out the snake, Hyllmungandr

Think these are kinda sneaky mixtures of norse names; Hyllmungandr being a riff on Jormungandr the World Serpent and Muginn being a combo of Odin's ravens, Huginn and Muninn

The group try to run, but are blocked by Iskat

Annnnnd gets bonked on the head, so naturally now it must ride the crew out, with Chopper translating for it

Nami has finally showed some more thievery for the first time since like Zeus, unable to pilfer relics but she has a map of the enclosure

They plan to rush to the other side of the enclosure and break through the wall there, but the 'Sun God' has begun its chase

I mean from a sheltered standpoint you can see why these guys think that's a god

That was probably the strongest Elbaf chapter for me so far

It had comedy, intrigue, action, deduction, chaos, all round a good time. I'm satisfied with it being like an enclosure, it feels fitting to fairy tales involving giants too and I love this fake sun god's design. Can't help feel a little bad for him though, his pets have been beaten up and his pet rabbit eaten...

But we account for Chopper now too, alas it's the Alabasta squad now rather than the East Blue saga squad - could still use some Vivi, think that's all the crew just gotta account for the Sunny. There's not many angles of Chopper's Elbaf outfit but the hat is cute, think he has the same Queen-esque trousers as Usopp.

But this is the injection of fun needed for the arc, because we have to remember, the plot doesn't happen to Luffy

Luffy happens to the plot

[edenfenixblogs]

Love you all (personal)

Leaving my phone in another room for awhile. I'm not ignoring any of you, and I have seen and will respond to all your EXTREMELY KIND messages, even if it takes awhile.

I was attempting to take a break from all this over the course of the week, because I felt myself growing weary and needed a recharge. Then my ceiling collapsed in heavy rain and I had to turn off my "Work Hours Focus" setting on my phone. It was supposed to silence all notifications and alerts from non-work and non-family phone numbers and block all non-work apps.

LOL...not really possible to have that setting on when coordinating with a bunch HVAC/Roofer dudes I've never met before.

But still. Jewish law commands us to find joy somewhere even when we're miserable. And while I know that is a sentiment that does not work for a lot of people, it has always been helpful to me.

So, despite all this, I am grateful for the shift in my plans this week for several reasons.

I'm grateful we were able to band together to help @rabid-catboy with an actual urgent issue. It feels very good to do something that you know helps someone. If my phone was in work mode I never would have seen this message in time to do anything about it. I had a similar experience in high school and I still think about it often. I get upset at how much was being asked of me and how much I was expected to know so that I could educate my peers and educators to do better. I didn't have the words to describe why something was so upsetting to me and why I know that it was wrong. Years later, I found the words and was so angry that I was expected to have them even when I was a child. It's an unfair burden, and I'll always be grateful that, even though I didn't find the words in time, I could help someone else find their words.

I am glad to have seen how active allies have been over the past week. I'm pretty emotionally drained by this all the time, so I may not say it as clearly or as often as I should, butt you give me hope. I am not used to relying on other or sharing my grief. It's actually a big problem. I don't tell people when I'm upset, because I'm afraid to inconvenience people or seem dramatic. that's part of the reason I struggled through undiagnosed PTSD for 13 years before reaching out for help. With the help of my BFF and my therapist, I chose to start being more open about my emotions with people. It's been a mixed bag. The people I knew would be here for me have continued to be here for me, thank goodness! But all (except 1) of the people I THOUGHT I could trust have simply stopped interacting with me at all. And I'm a lot less pushy/aggressive/vocal about all his suff IRL than I am when I have time to compose my thoughts and answer questions on here. It's been cataclysmic and devastating. To see so many people I've never met IRL not only lend emotional support to me personally but also provide emotional and temporal labor into fighting antisemitism and supporting Jews more broadly has gone a long way to restoring the faith in humanity that this conflict is trying to erode within me. I know I'm not he only Jew who feels this way right now. Please never underestimate the impact you have just by visibly existing in this space with us.

It's been nice being able to channel my anxiety about my ceiling into something productive.

Reminder: I love you all. Sorry for delayed replies. I'll be back. <3

[lloydfrontera]

A "Crown prince sells medicine" webtoon just came out????? And it looks so cute omg

https://comic.naver.com/webtoon/detail?titleId=818969&no=1&week=tue

OH MY GOD????? THIS LOOKS??? GOOD???

look at my skrunkly!!!

look at him!! my sweetheart my love my heart!! he looks!! so good!!! the asrahan genes really did came through for him (´TωT`)

look at his deranged little smile as he plans on stabbing himself with needles <333

alas. i already have a little complaint. and it is one we feared for a long time.

is that. is that damian. why is his hair so short. that's shoulder lenght hair. which i don't doubt will look amazing on him and i'm already salivating at the idea but. why did you cut his hair ( T∀T)

i'm so excited tho!!!! i've been dying to get more cpsm content and this!! looks tentatively good!!

i shan't,,, build my expectations too high because we already saw what happened last time but. i am cautiously hopeful about the first episode. he really do looks great <3

also a webcomic is the perfect way to get more people to go rabid with me about terminal devotion and royal malpractice. i do not do them justice in this blog and you guys deserve to see them be weird about each other in person (ФωФ)

i'm freaking out so hard omggg thank you so much for letting me know i cannot emphasize enough how much this made my day!!!

[absentmindedadmirer]

>×> I loved your headcanons for the 3-A so I wanted to know if you had any for the 3-B as well

If we're being honest- then no!! I did not have any on hand at the time of ask. However, I did let my brain go ballistic at 3AM again so... here we go again.

CLASS 3-B HEADCANONS

General Headcanons:

Nazuna is so damn done with these people (except Kuro and possibly Tsumugi).

Kanata likes patting Nazuna on the head while talking to him. Nazuna noisily complains it but if Kanata ever stopped, Nazuna would find it pretty weird.

Tsumugi likes to sit down and sew with Kuro sometimes. Wataru often interrupts such sessions by claiming that he can also make scarves and proceeds to pull out a neverending chain of them out of his sleeves.

Once when Nazuna bit his tongue, Leo had concluded that he was a space invader and threw a pencil at him.

Nazuna likes sending "Get Well" cards with cute stickers and doodles whenever one of his (when they were his current and still when they are his former) classmates are sick.

Kanata likes to take naps on peoples' shoulders, usually Rei or Wataru, but he has slept on everyone in 3-B various times.

Leo often comes up with script ideas and askes Wataru to visualise them for him. It mostly ends up dragging everyone else into it.

Kanata likes hearing peoples' voices in conversations (Rei probably has his favourite voice, by tone) so he closes his eyes while he listens to them and then doesn't end up responding because he fell asleep.

Kuro holds leo underneath the arms like a rabid animal to stop him from causing havoc.

Nazuna has had a hyperfixation on flower language after trying to decipher the message Wataru would send when he kept on giving people different coloured flowers [There was no reason, Wataru just likes those flowers at the time]

Tsumugi likes sending out cards after important events for each classmate. They're usually something from a cornerstore like a card with a puppy on it saying "I'm PAW-SITIVELY proud of you!"

Nazuna likes buying stationery on impulse but he hates when Leo finds out because then he begs to use it and it always ends up with glitter, marker, and stickers on the floors, walls, and both of their faces.

Rei likes to use a "secret language" with Wataru and Kanata so that he emphasised certain words and is very cryptic in speech. Nazuna just looks at him in confusion, Tsumugi and Kuro don't pay it any mind, and Leo asks if he's an alien. Wataru and Kanata don't actually know what it means either, they just like playing along.

Leo jumped into the ocean after seeing Kanata walk in with his clothes on. He immediately found an unidentified creature and wrestled with it, it omitting his vision, until Kanata peeled the octopus off his face.

! era:

Leo has called Kuro mother before. It was probably after something simple as Kuro chiding him for drawing on the desks on the rare occasions Leo did show up, but nobody's letting Kuro live it down.

Rei now calls him mother to tease him, as well as Leo who now frequently does it. Kanata does it with no malice whatsoever but because he thinks it's fun. He just playfully goes, "ok, 'mother'" whenever Kuro says something to him. Tsumugi tries to console Kuro on the fact but ends up accidentally calling him mother anyways. Nazuna wants to tease Kuro but he simply can't bring himself to call Kuro mother. Wataru, on the second Sunday of May, showers Kuro in bouquets as he walks into the classroom, wishing him very loudly a "Happy Mother's Day!! "

Leo was really interested in Rei's vampirism and spent a whole week trying to act like him. Eventually, he tried to sleep upside down like a bat [Despite Rei telling him that he, in fact, does not do that.] and Nazuna walks into the classroom that day with Leo falling on top of him from the ceiling.

Kuro, after some persuasion from Nazuna, embroiders and customises different types of fabric for his classmates.

He gifts Nazuna a little hankerchief with detailings of bunnies. He makes a towel for Kanata customised with various sea creatures on the edges. (Kanata barely remembers to use it, his hair always dripping wet anyways) He gifts Rei a pillow to place into his coffin because he assumes that it couldn't possibly be that comfortable in that thing. It's victorian styled (because he asked Shu for an idea) with little bats on the sides. Tsumugi gets a blanket in a clean geometric pattern. Wataru gets a cape with doves embroidered on the sides and it's very flowy. He showingly whirls it around and uses it in some of his performances. Leo got a scarf, but in the process of making, Leo kept demanding that it would be longer and longer. Kuro argued that if it reached his feet, Leo would trup over it, but Leo would keep on insisting so kuro would shake his head as he continued stitching. Leo did indeed trip on his face when he ran outside the first time he wore it.

Leo once shot an arrow into the classroom and used the rope attached to it to slide in through the window from the tree that he just happened to climb that morning, scaring the shit out of Tsumugi who was already in the classroom.

They held a puppet show in their classroom for funsies!!!

Leo had tought of it and ended up manifesting a script out of nowhere. Wataru looks it over and encourages everyone to participate to bring the vision to life. Tsumugi helped with the stage and Kuro made the puppets. Rei said that he was doing important work by supporting them (which just meant he wanted to watch it and do nothing) Kanata didn't know what everyone was doing but he likes putting the puppets in his hand and wiggling them around. Nazuna becomes the second unpaid actor forcibly. After the rehearsal, they do, in fact, force 3-A to watch it.

Nazuna likes to doodle on his notes when he gets bored, and Tsumugi when he notices, made Nazuna little charms that resembled his doodles and gifted to him.

Tsumugi did not find the need to mention his birthday, but when everyone pried, the class found out and Wataru pulled out party supplies, streamers, and balloons out of a hat he just flourished out of nowhere and strings them across the classroom so they can celebrate.

Wataru likes to enter the classroom in various different ways.

Once he jumped out of jack-in-the box set in the middle of the room and knocked Nazuna on his ass.

Tsumugi keeps a first aid kit on hand in case his luck acts up again, but he ends up lending it to Kuro a lot of the time, when he pricks his hand on a needle working with them in class again.

Nazuna forced Kuro to sit in the front with him because he was too short to see from the back and did not want to be alone.

Rei simply suggests that they stack books on a chair for him to sit on and Nazuna scowls (Rei doesn't even go to class!!)

Rei, in an attempt to outdo Eichi's 3-A field trips, suggests places for the group to go to, but ends up dying when it comes to actual event because he's in broad daylight.

Wataru likes to hold scavenger hunts throughout the school by leaving clues and leading everyone along. Nazuna ends up being the most invested.

Nazuna wanted to paint his nails in a cute style when he saw nail decals in a store window. He attempted to get Kuro to do it for him, but Wataru insisted he do it instead when he found out. It turns out surprisingly well, and Nazuna hesitatingly asks him to do more.

Kuro refuses to get his nails painted in any colour but black and runs away when Wataru points a glitter coat bottle at him.

Leo once asked Nazuna if he could be in charge of one of the broadcastings. Nazuna relented and that morning everyone could see Leo messily vlogging his day.

Like, "I climbed a TREE this morning, guys!! And thennnnnn I had a bagel--"

Tsumugi likes holding little trivia games in the classroom when they're all present (rare! also they don't do actual classwork I refuse to believe)

Kuro wins all the time. Tsumugi is the host but when he taps in, he only gets a close second surprisingly. Wataru, Rei, and Kanata always fail the pop culture sections. Leo answers the same thing to every single question and gets frustrated when Tsumugi shakes his head and tells him that's not the answer.

!! era:

Rei keeps on asking Nazuna how his phone works and Nazuna feels like he's talking to his grandpa.

Wataru still likes leaving cryptic notes in his old classmates' belongings and encourages them to finish the quest.

Kuro complains about being too old to do scavenger hunts anymore but still plays along. Nazuna doesn't want to show he's invested but curiosity gets the better of him.

Tsumugi somehow flounders and Rei and Kanata are the first ones at the end of the quest where Wataru holds a party. Wataru has to guide Leo specifically so the guy doesn't get lost.

Nazuna formed the groupchat when he was sitting in college, bored. He often gets frustrated when he doesn't get a response in the next 0.001 seconds.

Tsumugi usually responds first and Kuro follows with them asking how Nazuna's day was. Wataru likes entering the chat with a bunch of sparkle emojis. Rei misspells things frequently and accidentally sends random gifs. Leo just likes sending random voice and text messages about what he sees in his day, ignoring any logical progression in the chat.

Leo usually contacts Wataru when he wants to do some cool (vandalism) pieces on the walls of ES for the sake of art (and mostly so Eichi would be less mad).

Kanata asked Nazuna to puka puka with him in the pond. Nazuna didn't feel like saying now so now he spends the rest of the afternoon getting algae out of his shorts.

Rei likes to collapse on the floor during little meet-ups they'd have in a cafe or similar space for attention. Nobody really seems bothered by it and he usually cries out that the kids of this generation have no heart.

Nazuna once accidentally smacked Tsumugi with a door. He profusely apologised but became more erratic when Tsumugi simply responded that he was used to it.

Kuro has the same instincts to call his old classmates out on thing (like a mother hen-)

He sees Leo run around and wants to grab him by the scruff of the neck. He sees Nazuna biting his nails, he wants to swat it. He sees the Oddballs goofing around he wants to comment.

Kanata takes everyone on a trip to the aquarium.

Leo likes pressing his face against the glass. Nazuna keeps on pointing to cute fish that he sees while Tsumugi talks about little facts about them as Kuro listens. Rei fell asleep so Wataru drags them across the floor by the shoulder, loudly exclaiming at all the fish.

Nazuna wanted to get matching bunny keychains and decals for his phone with Kuro but Rei heard it and begged to be included. Nazuna didn't think he'd still have it but when Rei pulls out his phone in Rhythm Link meetings and Nazuna sees the bunnies, he gets psyche damage.

Aahhh. This class is interesting. In the way that none of them show up to classes and their interactions would be. stagnated somewhat. But I like them, they're eepy.

Thankies for the ask!! I love asks, they make me think more than I ever have in school- More Enstars Headcanons: Class 3-A Headcanons || Marine Bio Headcanons

[iamamythologicalcreature]

I'm-Not-Going-To-Count-These-Sentences Sunday

Thank you @aroace-genderfluid-sheep and @hushed-chorus for the tags! (Guess what hushed-chorus I did that thing we talked about.) Also thank you to everyone who has tagged me on other WIP-days! I really appreciate it <3

So... I'm not counting sentences this time. I write long sentences, and I make rabid use of sentence-extending punctuation. And I have this thing about posting excerpts that are semi-contained in some way. Plus it's going to take me forever to get this fic posted, so I gotta give ya'll something. THUSLY: Here have a bunch of words.

(I really should have pinned my bi-weekly updates on Wednesday, but OH WELL.)

Context: Baz POV, with Agatha in the chapel after midnight, being 17 year olds. Simon is out of the picture after Baz kinda sorta stole his voice with a tape recorder in fifth year.

“I never thanked you for saving me,” she said, with just a little too much effort at nonchalance. “You did, actually,” I said, not slowing, or sparing her so much as a glance. “You might recall how you resembled a hypothermic beached mermaid? You were quite free with your gratitude once you caught your breath. It was all very melodramatic.” There was a brief pause - possibly an attempt to work out whether my description of her was complimentary or not. Either way, it didn’t deter her. “I never got to thank you the way I wanted to,” she said, a hint of a whine working its way past her shoddily built facade. I didn’t answer right away as I fought down a sudden surge of irritation, one that threatened to trigger my more destructive tendencies - self-destructive, perhaps, but not exclusively so. The only thing worse than being considered a villain was being cast as a tragic hero - someone only misunderstood, just waiting to be saved. “Basil—“ she began, apparently ready to try something else. I stopped short, forcing her to halt both her forward movement and that regrettable demonstration of poor judgment. We were at the entrance to the chapel, now, and it was easy to crowd her against the cold statuary. “How exactly did you want to thank me, then, Wellbelove?”

Later it's entirely likely these two are going to put special effort into trying to forget any of this ever happened, because teenage mistakes are brilliant like that. You're welcome, Bazatha.

Also, super stoked to be working on a couple @caught-on-tape-fest podfics as well as cowriting with @ileadacharmedlife for the @carryon-reverse-bang. Wheeeee I can totally do this all! >.>

Tags/Hellos under the cut! (BTW regarding tags - I'm often unable to browse tumblr, so if you've posted something creative Sunday/Wednesday/for the hell of it, please feel free to tag me so I see it!)

Thanks for the tags over the past couple weeks @aristocratic-otter, @whatevertheweather, @brilla-brilla-estrellita, @ileadacharmedlife, @prettygoododds, @cutestkilla, @you-remind-me-of-the-babe, @tender-ministrations, @ic3-que3n, @artsyunderstudy, @youarenevertooold, @ivelovedhimthroughworse - I love love love seeing what everyone is up to! (Sorry if I missed anyone - apparently tags don't always work? Sigh.)

Tags and hellos also to @fatalfangirl, @katmiscellanious, @shrekgogurt, @rimeswithpurple, @alleycat0306, @ebbpettier, @supercutedinosaurs, @nightimedreamersworld, @thewholelemon, @theearlgreymage, @bubble-gumhead, @raenestee, @jasonfunderberkerthefrogexists (thanks for the extra notes XD), @ionlydrinkhotwater, @erzbethluna... And anyone else who wants tags, please let me know! Or just tag me! I love them.

[thursdaysrain]

im going to try posting here every day for . i dont know. a while. and see if i get a feel for it. just whatever off the cuff no editing

recently i watched adventure time front to back (having seen maybe 30% of it forever ago), and i feel kind of goofy for being one of those like 'woah this kid show is so deep and good' converts but there's just a lot of meat on those bones, i guess. it takes itself seriously thematically!

as always consuming very good fiction over such a dense period (i worked through like everything - 10 seasons, distant lands, and fionna and cake - within a few weeks) my brain is rewired and i feel bonkers.

unfortunately i have intense shipping urges but to my dismay (although not unexpected) it is not even one of the top ten ships on AO3 (63 out of 4k works). of course this aired during an era tumblr i'm not so familiar with but i know things were much darker on here 5-10 years ago for Problematic Fanwork.

finn/pb seems to be a radioactive ship. anything i see about it always has all these caveats or is like trying to thread the needle of not specifically being about a manipulative functionally-immortal queen grooming (in both connotations of the word, really) a young teenage boy to be Her knight. not to mention it loses out to pb/marceline, which is 1. gay 2. baited from early in the show and 3. ended up 'winning' and maybe most importantly, unfortunately, 4. is Not Problematic

dont get me wrong i like them together a lot. and i am very happy that it was canonized, or whatever. but there's just so much insanity inducing material w/ finn and princess bubblegum. the show regularly points out how fixated on her he is while also showing again and again how much of a possessive control freak pb is.

there's a lot that keeps running through my brain bc of AT, some things more interesting/useful than others (such as a specific perspective on like, disaster, time, and life going on despite everything that resonates strongly). but no i keep coming back to this weird thing. i blame my chldhood exposure to tenchi muyo for why i am the way i am. this is just my washu/tenchi thing all over again. that's literally what it is what the fuck

i dont think i could get into writing fanfic. im too obsessed w/ worldbuilding, like, over planning things, i cant just slap out a short story. maybe it's worth forcing myself sometime. the closest i ever got (except a couple pieces i wrote in elementary school and lots of fan chatroom RP) was i was planning for a 2hr renpy fanfic vn about manbagi from komi san (maybe my most rabid fixation on a character and a huge outlier) getting together with tadano. komi san kind of lost its momentum for me though, especially with manbagi rotated out of the main cast after her devastating (but inevitable) loss in the main ship war.

all this to say my only recourse is to rotate these cubes in my brain over and over until they shatter into countless pieces and leave their marks on my other works. there's a luxury a long running serial work has, and it's time to really ferment, and i regret i have no such luxury. i suppose that's another benefit of fanfic, though, being able to lean on that.

[mistressoftherant-blog]

TMNT Fanon

Hey all, it's me, back to (kinda?) rant about the TMNT fandom again. This isn't really a complete rant though, more just me pointing out what is popular fanon rather than canon. I've seen people getting angry at fan authors/artists who depict characters in ways that don't match popular fanon, but everyone is free to depict the characters how they want, and we don't all have to subscribe to popular fanon ideas. So I've listed out a couple of popular fanons or things that I see happen in a lot of stories below, some of which really annoy me (please let me know if any of these have actually been confirmed and I've missed it!)

1. Having the boys be different ages in series were they are confirmed to be the same age. In at least 12 and 03 they are all confirmed to be the same age, so why do so many fics insist on making Mikey a year or so younger than his siblings? It ties in to my previous rant about people babying Mikey, they conveniently forget that quadruplets are a thing so that they can make Mikey younger than the rest, really playing up the whole innocent little brother thing, which actually just completely unbalance all of their relationships (it's even worse when they make him years younger, particularly in human aus), so all the other brothers are in their mid to late teens and then Mikey is like anywhere from a toddler to 10 years old.

2. Unfortunately, for the most part, their sexualities and gender identities are just headcanons. Whenever they are canonically shown to have an interest in someone, it is a girl, and for the most part they are all shown to identify as male only. Now, I am all for giving the turtles different sexualities (I headcanon most Donnie's pretty much anywhere in the LGBTQA), but you cannot tell someone that they're wrong just because they don't headcanon them the same way as you (Rise and 12 Leo fans can be particularly rabid about this, I saw one Rise Leo fan telling someone that they can't ship Rise Leo with their female OC because he's gay, which is not canon)

3. How long 12 Mikey and Rise Leo spent in the prison dimension. They did not canonically spend years there. Quite frankly, I don't believe Rise Leo would have survived more than a few minutes in his Dimension x. And at most I would say Mikey was in Dimension x for a few days/weeks. His brothers did not take that long to follow him in, and I'm pretty sure time in dimension x isn't that screwy. I'm also pretty sure that he would have had some sort of scarring if he'd been in there for year. You can make as many headcanons as you want, but they are not canon. It especially doesn't work for Rise Leo.

4. Rise Leo being the medic. I have moaned about this before, so I won't completely rehash the same argument, but there is no canon proof that Rise Leo is the medic. There is also no canon proof that Rise Leo is an imnosiac. (It's also fanon that he is fluent in Spanish. Does he know some words in Spanish? Definitely. Is he fluent? No canon proof.)

5. Giving any Donnie apart from Bayverse, Rise, or Mayhem glasses. We... we see the Donnies as tots, and none of them except the aforementioned three have glasses. None of them have glasses as teens either (and no, goggles do not count). So why does pretty much every human au have Donatello wearing glasses? I know that TMNT is bringing back the 'only nerds wear glasses stereotypes', but we don't need to perpetuate it. And if you're not just doing it because of the stereotype, why not give one of the other turtles glasses? I don't think I've seen a single human au were any of the other brothers have glasses.

So, that's me done for today 🤣 Some of these annoy me more than others, and in some it's more the conduct of the fandom (aka when it comes to gender/sexuality fanon) that irritates me. Everyone is welcome to write the turtles however they want, and fanon ideas can become pretty popular to the point were people do act as if they are canon, but not everyone has to agree with them, or like them, and getting angry at someone for not conforming to the most popular ideas is not really beneficial to anybody.

[cluelessatthispoint]

hi!! saw ur reqs open <3 could you persnaps make something with engie? engie angst is such an unexplored genre and it makes me rabid !!! make that engineer suffer!!

OH! this sweet Texan boy is going to be in agony! I'm just so happy with angst....I like they way you think :)

Warnings: Blood, angst, suffering, hurt no comfort

~~~~~~~~

White hot tears sting painfully as they fall down his cheeks. The feeling of his poor abused lungs rapidly expanding and contracting fill him with lightheadedness and nausea. A truly miserable combination. Viscous dark crimson blood trickles and flows from the gash on his lower belly.

"Hnng!"

Waking up in a cold sweat his bright blue eyes scan the dark room. His breathing erratic and his left hand pressed firmly on the spot on his stomach. There is no injury, there is no blood...but the feeling of hot tears stinging his eyes is real. The cool crisp sheets cling to his skin, sticky from sweat. The dark room offers no comfort to alleviate his rising fears.....The feeling of something not quite right. The feeling of being....wrong. Wiping away the hot tears from his eyes he lets out a soft pitiful whimper.

Dying and respawning, dying and respawning....an endless cycle. A cycle of pain, adrenaline, fear and blood. A whine escapes his tense vocal cords, and he can't help but sob quietly into his other hand. His shoulders shaking with the force of his sobs. The sting of the cold metal from the gunslinger making contact with his sweaty, tearstained face sends shivers down his spine. A choked-up sob bubbles in the back of his throat.

"Oh God"

"Oh God..."

It hurts...Every damned breath burns. Every once in a while, the respawn gets finicky. Everybody on the team knows that. Sometimes you come back the same...sometimes you don't. It's an easy fix really. Just shoot the poor bastard and hope the respawn catches the mistake. But sometimes, no amount of sending someone through respawn will fix them...Last week it was Pyro. His best friend, his loyal arsonist companion...the week before it was the Heavy....

It's almost funny how easy it is to watch someone get their files deleted from the respawn internal databanks....The next time the person dies...they just...don't come back....It's easy to just flip a switch and send them off to their death. How they smile and think to themselves that the respawn with catch them. An enraged wail leaves their mouth. Tossing off his sweaty sheets Dell moves with lightning precision and speed to the computer lab. Checking every file...monitoring every action from the past few weeks up till the present. His file stared back at him...clenching his fist tightly he roars as he punches the monitor. The sound of his despairing, hoarse voice echoes throughout the lab. It sends small vibrations through the walls, and he punches the screen again and again in a blind fury until his hand is nothing but a bloody shredded mess. Blinging hot pain shoots up his arm and throbs with each beat of his heart.

"No...not me...not my turn...It's not my time yet..."

"IT WASN'T SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN TO ME!"

Collapsing to the ground with a resounding thud. He slowly brings his knees to his chest as best he can, he curls into a ball. Dell hasn't felt this scared since he was a boy. A young, stupid and foolish boy...his sobs are much quieter now. His blue eyes gaze at the floor in front of him. Seeing nothing and everything.

"God no...not me....not yet....."

His pleas fell on deaf ears.

~~~~~

well, how was that for ya? :)

[crimsonblackrose]

.

Eli you should be proud of yourself, that turned out nice:

They even put up lanterns.

Johnny drinking an RC cola and not beer, proud of him. The fact they sit together and eat. That Daniel brought an extra pair of chopsticks to share. Johnny tried gyoza and liked it. 🥺💖💖💖💖

Johnny wearing Mr. Miyagi's gear for blocking, the baseball catcher outfit and the way Johnny smiles in that thing. 💖

Johnny ripping what's left of his sandwhich in half and giving it to Daniel and Daniel looks at it like eww but then tries it and likes it.

Johnny being a slight shit by doing the crane pose, but it's clearly a joke.

I loved this whole opening.

Do you think Johnny painted this himself?

he carpools with Miggy.

Double date dinner with the LaRusso's!!!!

Of course Daniel's home has a built in pizza oven and he makes his own pizza.

Daniel catching Johnny's flick beer cap is also another favorite.

He also made broccoli rabe and is getting a barolo (italian wine) from the garage.

Anthony: What the hell why are you here/Johnny: who the hell are you, wait a second are you the son? Anthony: It's called a growth spurt dipshit.

I wonder when the last time someone noticed Anthony was.

Sam used to walk around the showroom floor like she owned the place so they tease that she'll take it over, but there's no actual pressure for it. Though Daniel expects her to go to college.

Miguel and his straight A's and dreams of Stanford.

Oh Daniel I can see the gears in your head working on paying for Miguel's tuition.

Miguel accidentally spills wine on Daniel and breaks the glass, curses, and then apologizes for cursing and is so panicked. He was reaching for the salad.

No one asked about Anthony or really talked to him.

Both Sam and Miguel look unhappy/distracted

Silver having a rough time due to the kitchen torch taking a moment to work.

There's a headcannon that Terry's sick/dying. I'd like to note that he's got medicine in front of him and as soon as he tells the chef he's skipping breakfast the chef asks if he should call the doctor.

Kenny showing up to cobra kai to ask for help from Robby and Kreese doesn't even let him finish but allows Kenny to at least try because Robby goes to the mat saying his older brother was one of the toughest guys in juvie.

Daniel thinking ah yeah I got this lesson, and the prize because these kids like competition: If you succeed you get to lead class all week. Crickets. And pick out which flavor gatorade I buy next. 🤣🤣 And that wins them over.

Poor Miguel thinking once again he Mr. LaRusso might not think he's good enough for his daughter.

Daniel teasing Miguel the way Mr. Miyagi teased him.

Demetri scaring the kids. "I heard he drowned a kid in a pool teaching him to kick and that was before he sicced a rabbid dog on Eli."

Ah, not fully accurate. Miguel survived, and I don't think the dog was rabid and He didn't sicc the dog on him he just called the dogs.

I do think for a lesson with students you don't know too well, even if 90% of them used to be your own, having kids try to jump over buildings is a terrible idea Johnny and a couple mattress isn't enough protection.

The other issue is, unlike Daniel and the Eagle Fangs who are more open to learning Miyagi-do and up for the challenge. Daniel's spent 3 seasons telling Miyagi-do students that Johnny is a dangerous and monstrous person, add to it what Demetri tells them and their own, like 2 days as Cobra Kai kids and they don't want to do anything he tells them to do. It's literally stacked against him.

Measuring by Nates. Omg was I calling Nate Ryan? Nate I'm sorry. They truly rarely say most of the B/C plot kids names.

None of the kids jump which, fair but also kinda rough on Johnny that no one listens to him. But also Johnny???? WHY THE HELL FOR THIS ONE? Practice their jumps closer to the ground first. Don't just shove them out of the nest. Let them take some practice jumps from somewhere safer.

This feels like one of those flanderization moments, of like Netflix got their hands on this and was like give him something the kids will all say no to because it's a terrible idea and super unsafe.

Kyler? Kreese come on. Be a little nicer to Kenny. Great question Kenny, how am I supposed to fight if I haven't had any training yet?

Kyler literally scaring Kenny off the mat and then laughing. Poor Kenny, and I think he left without his shoes. That was mean. Johnny wouldn't have done that.

Hawk: Let's practice at a fish tank in a Chinese restaurant.

This is not fully Sam, this is Daniel.

Sam really snaps. She uses being a teenager as an excuse for all her poor choices and says she's made a couple of mistakes. Which fair, but also being coddled and believing she can do no wrong does not help. "You're a 50-something-year-old-man who live alone, drinks all day, and clearly hasn't figured out his own life."

Which is very much a mad teen thing to say, but also a bit of that is once again Daniel.

"If you want to sit in the backseat your whole life, go right ahead, it's no sweat off my back." He also points out that he gets to do what he loves every day because he didn't listen to his parents or do what they wanted him to do.

Kyler to Tory: want to stand in line with me to buy Nikes?

Tory: How many sneakers do you need?

In otherwords he's asked her to do this before and she's stood in line with him before while he buys shoes. Kyler says she looks good in Dunks. ( A type of Nike shoe) Maybe he bought her some?

Terry: Turn around you son of a bitch.

The fact Terry doesn't even wait until the students are fully far away and these kids don't give a shit about the tall guy who walks past them into their dojo.

Terry comes in pissed, but stops to take off his shoes before crossing the mat.

Sometimes you forget how tall TIG is.

Terry's also the first one to come in, show he hasn't gotten rusty and doesn't actually hit Kreese, just shows him. They also were circling each other around the mat while Terry ranted.

Kenny your brother gave you a fairy god-brother and he's here:

Note that this is more big brothers big sisters style adoption but he's going to do his best, he's going to fuck up a little but he's going to try and help you.

Also, again whose paying and buying Robby his clothes other than Netflix?

Shawn is supposed to get out this summer. But he got an extra month for spitting in a guards face.

Kenny blames himself for Shawn being in juvie. Shawn had some bad friends at school, Kenny caught this friend stealing from their parents. the guy tried to hurt Kenny but Shawn protected him, defended Kenny but because the guy got so badly beaten Shawn got juvie. Which is wild since it sounds like it happened in the Payne household, so wouldn't it be self defense?

Is Kenny like allergic to dairy? What is with all of the milk stuff?

Kenny: All i can do is run. Robby realizing from Miyagi-do that Kenny can use that for karate.

oh man Lucille

Apparently Lucille saved, scrimped and put every spare cent in a jar she called The Daniel Fund. And Daniel spent it all on a round trip ticket to Okinawa and then again on Mr. Miyagi's Little Trees.

Man Lucille must be pissed about TKK2.

It is funny though to have someone go oh so you did this right and Daniel have to realize that no he was a kind hearted dumbass.

Johnny is so fucking proud of her. She's so stubborn like her dad. But she also does what she wants, she just actually has to figure out what she wants, but like she said she's a teen. She's got time.

Look how happy and proud of herself she is

Terry and his medicine again.

Someone made a meme out of Terry in front of the mirror and I forgot for a second it was a meme and was like where's the lipstick writing? 🤣

oooh I like his black cup

It's March 14th.

Terry is getting ready for bed before 10.

Cheyenne's last name is Hamidi

He's been ignoring her since Friday.

We're having vegan cacciatore for dinner, is that okay?

I'll save you a plate. Honey where are you. I love you. Please text me back... Is everything alright? (Yesterday) Terrance... Why aren't you texting me back? Are you mad at me? You must be busy...Let me know when you'll be home.

Terry had his cobra kai tattoo covered up.

Their first All-Valley

Saturday December 20th

Kreese entered cobra kai before they even had any students. He wants to show the world that 'their way is the right way'.

Terry's father made him take over the company or else get cut out of the inheritance.

Kreese: I can't do this without you Terry.

Also Kreese: You can get through anything, you know why? Because you got me.

I didn't leave you behind in the war and I'm not going to leave you behind now. Kreese, he's leaving you to go work at company. I get that this is support for him being scared but still.

The absolute drama of Terry putting his hair up. They should've done this for Violet Baudelaire the first time she puts her hair up in a Series of Unfortunate Events.

We spend so much time, zoomed in on his hair.

Johnny going for it and Carmen trying to save him due to the other people in her home. 🤣

I think it's kinda funny and adorable that he gives his big speech to Carmen then turns to Rosa and her friends and is like I don't know if they got all of that, do you want to translate and they're all nodding like they got his big romantic speech.

And that they're like he's cute does he have an older brother as Carmen and Johnny make out in the entry way.

AGAIN WITH THE NEW BACKGROUND COBRA KAIS OMG

Go Kenny go! Also the fact Kenny is proud of himself for charging forward and landing a punch.

Apparently Mitch did homework by watching Hillybilly Handfishing.

What I love about Miguel is once he figured it out he didn't just try to win, but he taught the other eagle fangs too.

Pure delight but also, that poor fish

Aw Sam called Johnny sensei.

Perseverance, courage and strength are apparently watch Daniel's hachimaki means.

We never do get to see what else Johnny had planned for the Miyagi-do's. I was wondering why Daniel got two days and Johnny got one, and it's because they don't show it (or at least not in this episode)

And on the one hand it feels like oh but Miguel did well and the goal is for them to learn and everything from each other and technically Johnny you're bonding with Sam (something that if I remember correctly, Daniel didn't like either)

But Daniel also taught Robby and (arguably) kidnapped his son, poaches his students and Kreese stole most of the rest of his students so it's like a sore subject. Even though I'm happy that they're bonding and pretty sure Miguel's feeling a little more secure in dating Sam with Daniel.

Plus as soon as they enter the dojo all the kids run up to look, even the Miyagi-do that are supposed to be paying attention to Johnny and following him that day.