#schmerzerling

[radio-gaya]

@hellosaidthemoon, wherever you are, i hope you are vv proud of yourself because I drool at your art from so long ago at least once a week. its beautiful artwork to absolutely wonderful fics (@schmerzerling). thank you.

[pussypopstiel]

I could never “recommend” a fic i have read because i have very bad taste but i will always advocate that one reads the dean winchester beat sheet and in some sacred place by schmerzerling

[profoundbondfanfic]

Your Heart Makes

Your Heart Makes by schmerzerling (@schmerzerling​) Rating: Mature Word Count: 51k

Castiel is directionless, depressed, and working in one of the worst possible places to be so—Disneyland Park. Seeing hundreds of excited people every day, trying to smile for the customers, and dealing with the fact that his infuriating brother Gabriel is so readily capable of every park job he throws himself into makes Castiel feel like he could barely manage to keep his head above the foot of water in the “It’s a Small World” canal that he oversees.  All of that changes when the universe sees fit to put him in a Disneyesque love story opposite the handsome animator in the window on Main Street who doesn’t care about Castiel’s lethargic lack of idealism—so long as he can make caustic Cas come to appreciate every attraction in the park. But life isn’t a Disney fairytale, and even though an easy out and a happy ending are what Castiel seeks, he’ll begin to wonder if the happiest ending isn’t really an ending at all.

This fic is so sweet and so heartbreaking. It somehow captures all the magic of Disney, along with a disappointed nostalgia when the Magic Kingdom can’t help but fail to live up to its own expectations.

Cas is a pessimist and who hasn’t even watched most of the Disney classics, but he stays because a job is a job. Dean lies at the other end of the spectrum, a superfan of all things Disney. But he isn’t a naive, manic pixie dream girl to Cas’s jaded protagonist, he’s suffered his share of trials and tribulations. He’s had to work for his optimism and love of happy endings.

Outraged that Cas has spent so long at Disney without absorbing any of it and determined to show Cas the magic that has kept him going for so long, Dean leads him on a multi-date tour of Disneyland. In between Dumbo flights and  Pirates of the Caribbean rides, we learn more about the factors that led to their Disneyland meet cute, and exactly why Dean never realized his greatest dream: to play a Disney character.

[honeyvanity]

i was finally able to listen to carry on my wayward son. nature is healing. now destiel recs please

[thetiredstuff]

This is just mostly a handy little post for me but I asked people to rec me some destiel AU best friends to lovers fics and this is what I got:

Recs from ltleflrt:

okay, cupid. by orange_crushed On Air by wincechesters Just Turn Around and Go by @porcupine-girl Version 2.0 by Elizabeth1985 aka @cocklesheadboop Ignore the Butterflies: Best Friend Advice from Dean Winchester by impatient14 A Match Made (and Misunderstood) by surlybobbies More Views. More Money. by herbivoredinosaur Remember When by VioletHaze aka @scones-and-texting-and-murder When In Vegas by Dmsilvis & TobytheWise

Recs from doctorprofessorsong

One of my favorite fics of all time is Evangelist by @valleydean. It's really enemies to friends to lovers but the enemies part becomes friends pretty quickly because they are deeply obsessed with each other. One of the classics if you haven't read it is To Build a Home. Childhood friends who broke up and find themselves back in each other’s life. It is very angsty but they have a lifelong friendship so you get a lot of childhood and teenage friendship moments. If I may self recommend, I just wrote Can't Fight the Moonlight in which they are in this post canon partnership and both want to add sexual intimacy but the partnership is soft so you get some really fun platonic intimacy. It's not AU, obviously, but may have something of what you want. Seraph by @dothraki-shieldmaiden is a superhero au where they are friends and roommates to lovers. It has great world building. More than Kisses by @friendofcarlotta is a friends to lovers epistolary romance. Dean and Cas are pen pals and they share an absolutely gorgeous emotional intimacy. Tiamatv has a few that fit the bill. I'm gonna mention Marchen because I love the world built in that one. Dean Winchester is a prince locked in a tower. Feel free to also skim my fic recs. @riversrecs

Recs by castiellesbian:

tiamatv's "It's the End of the World (As We Know It)" is a friends to enemies to lovers if that counts? They were childhood best friends in that one "A Midterms Night's Dream" by Englandwouldfall is an au where they're roommates (oh my god they were rommates). "In Some Sacred Place" by schmerzerling is a good one where they're friends throughout most of the fic, but it's kind of depressing overall

Recs from porcupine-girl

Just Turn Around And Go (roommates-slash-best-friends): https://archiveofourown.org/works/4228830 Like four weddings and a funeral but without the funeral (Sam POV, Sam is clueless and doesn’t realize they’re together): https://archiveofourown.org/works/6225625 Go Down With This Ship (online fandom besties, don’t realize they know each other irl): https://archiveofourown.org/works/8023642

Rec by trampledundercas

#i thought of ‘ready to fall’ by lemonsorbae on ao3

A whole bunch of recs from dean-you-assbutt-cas-loves-you

A Tale of Two Tropes by Amelia_Clark (E, 7k) As You Walk On By by MercyBraavos (E, 23k) Are We Any Different? by LeviathanBlue, SerpentCountess (T, 41k) More Than Kisses by  FriendofCarlotta  (E, 29k) things i knew when i was young by stormwarnings  (T, 16k) Alright  by  turningthepages  (T, 46k) To Build a Home by intothesilentland  (M, 383k) When In Vegas  by  Dmsilvis, TobytheWise (E, 16k) The Ocean Between Us  by  noxsoulmate  (E, 27k) Room for Two (The Mattress AU) by  almaasi  (E, 14k) Honey-Baked  by  mishaminion69, sydkn3e (E,  89k) The Ones We Choose  by  lightmyway  (E, 82k)

EDIT: MORE:

Recs by bexfangirlforlife:

The Graveyard Shift by riseofthefallenone. PurgatoryJar Evangelist by embrancsxx0 Stay with me Sweetheart by Mandalarose We are what we pretend we are by tricia_16 Tricks of the Trade by Trenchcoat_Impala

Recs by impaledbeetle:

okay, cupid by orange_crushed Seek to Know You Better (E) by ahurston Après (E) by Imogenbynight Here's a couple aus that i really really enjoy that aren't necessarily best friends to lovers: spirit of the west (M) by teen_dean Parachutes (E) by chaoticdean (this one literally changed my life it is so good) And This, Your Living Kiss (M) by opal_bullets (again, this is life changing) Roll With It (E) by saltnhalo (this is a The Proposal (movie) au) Shut Up (Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is) (E) by kototyph

Recs by butch--dean:

spirit of the west by teen-dean (everyone should read this 90's horse girl dean au where he befriends cas, a local veterinarian) I carry your heart (I carry it in my heart) by unicornpoe (I am a sucker for all "cas using dean as a vessel" fics) Après by imogenbynight (surely everyone has read this? dean and cas in paris what more can you ask for) under the midnight sun by northernsparrow (dean is the caretaker of a research station in the arctic and cas is a mysterious bird researcher) (I also rec you can keep holding on by this author but be warned that it is very grief-driven - but it is an in-depth study of the way they care for each other) though the course may change by imogenbynight (fake dating AU at a couple's retreat - another one that everyone has probably read but is so worth mentioning in case you haven't) there's no cell service in the afterlife by screamsintothesun (cas gets back from the empty and his phone blows up with dean's voicemails & texts) Gold in the Edges of Our Vision by SewingNatural (dean and cas eat peaches together on a hot summer evening. The writing style on this one is really really lovely) these are just a few from my bookmarks but also there is a really good rec list here & here (this one has a link to a specific friends to lovers list here) that I refer to often when looking for new fics/authors to dig through!!

Recs by mercurialkitty for some reason tumblr won't allow me to add them to my post so just click on their name to go to their post!

These are all the ones i've gotten up til now but will def edit if I get any more. If you see this post and think of a Destiel AU best friend to lovers fic that isn't on here or just a Destiel AU (no abo) fic that isn't on here: PLEASEEEEEE GIVE ME ALL THE DESTIEL AU FIC RECS (no abo)

Also i didn't tag the people who recommended it cuz I don't wanna annoy them but I linked back to all of their original posts or comments!

A hugeeeeeeee thank you to everyone who replied to my annoying messages for fic recs cuz I really really appreciate it. thank you all so so so much!!!!

[haveyoureadthisfanfic]

Summary: Wherein Castiel defied God for Dean before Dean even knew his name.

Author: @schmerzerling

Submitter: @undercovercannibal

[here4thetrama]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Supernatural Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester, Dean Winchester/Everyone Characters: Sam Winchester, Charlie Bradbury, Gabriel (Supernatural), Gunner Lawless, Becky Rosen, Eileen Leahy, Benny Lafitte Additional Tags: Wrestling, Nerd Dean Winchester, Misunderstandings, Humor, Nurse Castiel (Supernatural), Bisexual Dean Winchester, Alternate Universe - Comic Shop, Coming Out, Sam Winchester Knows, Matchmaking, Dean Winchester Wears Panties Summary:

Dean Winchester—successful business owner, wrestling enthusiast, and all-around nice guy—is out and proud. Only he doesn't know it yet. And neither does the newest (hottest) guy this side of bumfuck Kansas.

[destielfanfic]

from the inbox, #8

We have a bunch of asks in our inbox that could be easily answered with a simple link to our Tags Page, but since there’s so many of them, it may be a good time for a new help post. You can find previous From The Inbox posts here.

Hey. i just discovered this website and it's just great. Can you recommend the best non AU fics?

Welcome to our blog! Our Tags Page is your best friend now. So called non AU fic on our blog are tagged with #SU tag - Supernatural Universe, fics recced by mods and #sr: su tag - submitted recs: supernatural universe, fic recs submitted to our blog by our followers (this feature is not available anymore, do not send your recs to dff!) 

Check out this post where we talk more about canon verse fics and our tagging and this post for some tips how to navigate our blog!

The best canon verse fics are different for every fan, but if you are interested in our favorite fics, check out Personal Favorites tag and look for fics tagged with #SU tag!

Post Canon fix it fics? Preferably where dean is a huge wreck and then they rescue Cas, preferably more than 100000 words. I’ve read a lot but I need more suggestions. explicit is all good  

We have 2 post finale rec lists- Happiness isn’t in the Having and Good things Do Happen. These were made very soon after the finale and capture the first wave of feelings. There’s much more fix it fics posted now but you’ll have to look through rec lists made by other fans. Take a look at @destiel-fic-rec-lists blog. 

Do you have any recs on long angsty sad slow burn destiel fics?

We have tags for all theses things - #epic (40-100k word count) and #super epic (100k+ word count), #angst , #sr:angst and #angstiest, and #slow building romance. Check out our super long fic rec list Move Aside Tolstoy and mature themed rec list Not All Those Who Wander Are Lost. 

And here’s some angsty slow burn recs to get you started, all links go to our reviews

12 Steps by gedry

Dancer in the Dark by sandares 

Empty Spaces by schmerzerling

In the Shuffling Madness by araftatsea

Kingdom Come by cheesewithmy

Muscle Memory by komodobits

new testament [just more of the same’verse] by outpastthemoat

Scars by lemonsorbae

So Says The Sword by komodobits, 

The Sawdust Men by linoresearch

Someone I Forgot to Be by mathildamavis

White Albatross by spnergiout

The Wish Machine by justkeeponwriting

Your Heart Makes by schmerzerling

[castiellesbian]

Hi!! i'm asking a bunch of people but do you have any destiel au best friend to lovers fic recs???? pleaseeeeee (no abo) thank youuuuu!!!!

tiamatv's "It's the End of the World (As We Know It)" is a friends to enemies to lovers if that counts? They were childhood best friends in that one

"A Midterms Night's Dream" by Englandwouldfall is an au where they're roommates (oh my god they were rommates).

"In Some Sacred Place" by schmerzerling is a good one where they're friends throughout most of the fic, but it's kind of depressing overall

[ladysstardust]

guess what besties? fic rec list updated!!

i also updated the colour coding (adding a second column for better identification) on a lot of fics that I missed lol.

i also wanted to use this post to rec Empty Spaces by schmerzerling that I found on this angst fic post. I read it over the weekend and wow. Really incredibly well written. Please Mind the Tags.

[cosmicwavelength]

*thinking about that fic by schmerzerling*

[ladybobofdoom]

Of False Gods and Demon Kings

A Destiel Anthology

in the pines by schmerzerling (deleted)

The Tower And Ruins by KelpietheThundergod

All These Books Are Published In Heaven by getintrouble

This Nervous Condition by Anonymous

Kintsukuroi by snarklyboojum

forgotten fruit by rupertgayes

the taste of gravel in the mouth by deathbanjo (deleted)

This collection is for private use only. I make no money out of this. I have no intentions of selling. If any of the artists object to this, I will take this post down.

The art I used for the cover:

1 @mjulmjul​

2 @ex0skeletal-undead​

3 @sketchbookdean​

[pussypopstiel]

I think about her (hellosaidthemoon destiel art)

[profoundbondfanfic]

Do you have any fics that a very gender? Very confronts toxic masculinity in a moving way? Bonus points for 🏳️‍⚧️

I have to say it was a bit of a challenge to decode this ask so we've decided to do something general and hopefully some of these are what you were asking for. Here are some recs with fics that feature trans!characters in a meaningful way or focus on gender roles.

Fem in a Black Leather Jacket by bleuzombie [Mature, 5k words] #trans!dean

Dean has done the work to be comfortable with who himself but some reassurance from his boyfriend Castiel goes a long way as they head to a concert. Dean never dreamed he would be so lucky to find someone who could love him for all of him, panties and all.

love in the time of quarantine by sharkfish [Explicit, 6k words] #trans!castiel

Dean says, “We should have sex.” Cas chokes and looks up at him. “I’m sorry, I didn’t hear that.” “We should have sex,” Dean repeats, carefully enunciating each word. Cas keeps staring at him blankly. “It’s fun and you’re hot. Perfect quarantivity.”

Made Manifest by schmerzerling [Mature, 6k words] #trans!dean

Wherein Castiel defied God for Dean before Dean even knew his name.

Mira Mira by vipjuly [Teen, 22k words] #gender fluidity

Castiel is forced to retire from being the world's most prolific and successful hired gun. He gets dropped off at Winchester B&B with a vague notion to 'find himself', but he's having a hard time understanding first of all: what that means, and secondly: how to even do that. The proprietor of Winchester B&B, Dean, a retired ex Fed, seems to have some ideas of his own.

Novaks, Rebooted by violue [Explicit, 57k words] #trans!claire

A single father, his trans daughter, a whole new life in The Golden State.

Sometimes You Have to Lose to Win by zeppazariel [Explicit, 55k words] #trans!dean

The thing is, Dean is okay with being bisexual. He’s come to terms with it, ya know? He’s got eyes, and he can see that men are hot sometimes; whatever, not a big deal. He’s perfectly fine with it. In theory. Not so much in practice. Dudes are a no-no, outside of looking. He’s not budging on this one, so it’s with confidence that he announces, “There ain’t a guy in the world who’s going to change my mind, Sam.” “You’re tempting the universe to make fun of you again,” Sam sing-songs. “The universe doesn’t have shit to do with this,” Dean argues. Sam hums. “Whatever you say, man.” But, as it turns out, the universe has a lot to do with this, and it never really misses a chance to mock him, drag him down, kick him while he’s curled into a fetal position, then take him out back and shoot him while laughing cruelly at his misery. Meeting Cas is precisely what that feels like.

BONUS: a/b/o fics that focus on gender roles

Aromatic Adjectives Need Not Apply by JessJesstheBest [Teen, 4k words]

Castiel was an Alpha, despite what everyone always guessed upon meeting him. He was tall, and he had the stern and imposing profile, but, to most people, those Alpha traits were where it ended. He had a lithe, runner’s frame, with trim waist and thick thighs. “Child-bearing hips” he’d been told. Though, obviously, no children would be born of him. This scuffling man, though. He was... round. Potentially child-bearing. And Castiel was sure his true mate wasn’t either of the other two men. Or Castiel is an Alpha that doesn't believe in true mates but sniffs one out anyway.

Butch by tiamatv [Explicit, 54k words]

When the flower shop owner sweeps his fingers through his hair, he nearly knocks the flowers tucked behind his left ear off; he spends a fussy moment readjusting them with both hands. “I don’t need to be rescued. Especially not by a stranger.” Sheesh. Touchy. But since Dean would have flashed fangs if anyone had thought he couldn’t take care of his own damned self, he can’t be throwing any stones. He shrugs—big and exaggerated, both hands up. "Not sayin’ you did. Look, not your fault that God put alpha brains at the base of their dicks." The lowered blue eyes snap back to his. Flower Boy inhales with his lips parted, all pretense at not sniffing Dean out gone, and his eyes go wider. Dean might not dress or act or look like any kind of sweet little omega, but he knows just what he smells like: really fucking inviting.

Oddly Shaped Empty by jemariel [Explicit, 65k words]

Dean grew up thinking -- knowing -- he'd be an alpha. Until he failed to present. As a beta, he has no mating cycle, no noticeable pheromones, none of the physical markers that are so important in a world of alphas and omegas. He's out of place. How is he supposed to navigate his relationships and find love when he doesn't fit into the neatly-defined boxes he's used to? By the time he meets his new roommate, Castiel, he's more or less given up on finding a mate. He wears his secondary gender like a chip on his shoulder. But you never know what the future holds, who will come into your life, and how they might change it forever..... Queer themes, finding identity, reconciling the past, and a whole lot of smut.

[rec-a-fanfic]

Title: Made Manifest

Author: schmerzerling

Fandom: Supernatural (TV 2005)

Rating: M

Status: Complete

Length/Chapters: 6941 words, 1 chapter

Summary:

TRANS DEAN WINCHESTER MY FUCKING BELOVED

i dont know i just love it. dean winchester is closeted and trans and then when he is brought back in s4 he is reborn

Link:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/9529412

-🍟 (dont mind the spam im back at it again to try and make sure you got that buffer/backlog. finals are kicking my ass at the moment so i cant submit daily for a few days!! bleh)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/9529412

[saywhatjessie]

hi jessie :) i’m wondering if ur still in contact with melissa (schmerzerling) just because i’m not sure if her bio is joking or not about being dead and idk i got really worried. love u!

There's a lot going on here but, um, no. Not dead.

If you're referring to this:

"The author is dead" references a school of literary analysis in which once a work is published, the author can no longer be taken as word of law. In this case, it most likely refers to the Supernatural writers trying to add things once an episode airs to make it seem less gay.

Hope this helps!