#scarymouche

[centuriantalevevo]

Fuck it his name is Hatsune Scara or Wowaka

It's one or the other he can't have neither.

Unless he wants to be named Mai's Child (I created Mai so he could have an active mom figure lmao)

Or fuckin... war criminal at heart

Scaramewmew

That's his name.

My catboi.

All of these names are very original and creative, I promise.

If you can genuinely name him like they give a prompt to name him I will freak out and proceed to name him fucking Fukase lmao-

Nah.. Wowaka... wowaka sounds better.

Nah his name is Unknown Mother Goose

This is why you don't give me the task of naming you. This is why you name yourself. Don't ever trust me with names I'll fucking name you Raw Toast like how I nicknamed Felippe

HIS NAME IS IKE-

ICHAEL B. EVELAND THE SECOND LMAO-

THAT'S THE ONE BOIS WE GOT IT

Or TOAST- Or BEANZ-

[lightofthedeep]

Hey...Me and you are both Light...And we both like Scarymouche...We have to fight to the death to see which one of us is the real one.

Maybe it’s in all Lights DNA to be a scara stan 🤔 One of us can take Scaramouche, the other can take Wanderer

[your-fave-darling]

'comments? questions? suck my fucking ass' scarymouche to ajax

[hardly-a-p3rson]

scarymouche and taglia are with me and they are bickering so much

[sondepoch]

Want | Scaramouche x Reader

Scaramouche + “You make me want things I can’t have.”

You don’t need Scaramouche at all—don’t need him, don’t need his men, don’t need any of his diplomatic connections to achieve the goal the Tsaritsa presented before you with. Still, you can’t help but want him.

MASTERLIST

Request a character or a ship and I’ll write a drabble for you ^^

The worst part is that Scaramouche actually respects you.

It’s something everyone in the Fatui knows by now: that you’re the only Harbinger he can tolerate, the only Harbinger he’s willing to work with, the only Harbinger he respects enough to invite to these little strategy missions.

It’s the highest honor one can receive from a man like Scaramouche, who’s known best for his averseness to all encounters that don’t directly benefit him. And yet, it’s nothing more than that: a distinction in his mind between the incompetent and the competent, useless and the useful.

You simply happen to fall into the latter category.

You’re not sure if that makes it better or worse.

“And I was also thinking that as soon as we’ve set up enough microfinancing loans, we could start to move into the city. Get the towns on the outskirts used to Fatui presence, and then hit the Inazuman capital with our people just as they’ve begun to hear of us. The only problem there is that we’d need to combine our forces if we want to effectively disperse our agents, which would leave us open to attack…”

You tune the man out, barely paying attention as he continues on about infiltration tactics. 

After all, it’s not the Fatui you care about.

It’s him.

“But I suppose getting a third Harbinger involved would only complicate the situation, since we’re the only diplomats who’ve ever been sent to Inazuma. Which would mean…”

“A third Harbinger wouldn’t need to be involved in our diplomatic operations,” you say, interrupting the man. “Assume that your and my forces completely focus on intelligence within the city. If we bring a third Harbinger in, we can keep them excluded from the operation and tell them to solely focus on keeping guard to protect us from attacks.”

Scaramouche hesitates when he hears your idea, and then his face breaks out into the rare, thankful smile that you joined the Fatui to see.

“Of course,” he says, bringing a glass of wine to his lips as he leans further back in the chair. “As expected of someone as strategically inclined as you.”

You can only smile, grateful that the man you adore is giving you a compliment. The fact that he only likes you for your brain is a thought you refuse to entertain.

“You’re too kind, Balladeer.”

“Only because you deserve it,” the man says, something flashing in his eyes that could be counted as less-than-innocent, though you know by now that it’s nothing you can pay attention to.

“Well, my efforts would be useless without your men,” you respond, bringing your own glass to your lips as you lean back in your armor, letting the thick metal clink against the chair when your back hits it. 

“Nonsense. Your mind is sharp enough that a loss in resources wouldn’t hinder you.”

“That’s…” true.

And that’s probably the worst part of all.

You don’t need Scaramouche at all—don’t need him, don’t need his men, don’t need any of his diplomatic connections to achieve the goal the Tsaritsa presented before you with. It’s a painfully obvious fact given your track record: near-perfect except for the single blemish that forced you to join the Fatui in the first place—but the Tsaritsa has always known that your blunder was intentional, that there was never any flaw in your plan, that you consciously outed yourself as Snezhnaya’s most wanted thief so you could get closer to the mysterious enigma that was the Sixth Harbinger.

Yet, as you sit in his room, drinking his wine at his table to concoct a battle plan to work around his men, you’re no closer to the man than when you first joined.

Or—perhaps that’s a lie. Perhaps you know more about him now than you did before.

After all, back when you didn’t know him, you believed him to be a pretty man with a penchant for draconian punishment. Both true, except that now, you know that he’s already been promised to another—and that Scaramouche, the Balladeer, Sixth of the Eleven Harbingers, is someone who would never stoop so low as to cheat.

Yet, he respects you.

Or rather—he respects your mind.

“Something wrong?” Scaramouche leans forward with a hint of vague concern in his eyes, and you hate how you know that it’s that: vague concern, distant and hazy because your relationship doesn’t warrant any actual care.

“Nothing, Balladeer. Just thinking about a plan I’m going to present to the Tsaritsa tomorrow.”

“Ah,” he hums, not bothering to ask because he knows it’s likely confidential. “Well, you should relax. I doubt that your plan has any flaws, and even if it does, the Tsaritsa will trust you enough to allow you to execute.”

“Right.” 

“No, I mean it.” Scaramouche offers you another rare smile, pushing the glass of wine closer. “People need to indulge every now and then. Even Harbingers. You’ll be better off if you give in to what you want.”

It’s out of character for him to look out for you like this, but you accept the glass regardless.

“There’s no point,” you mutter, gazing at your wavy reflection in the deep red liquid. “I want too much. Can’t have it all. There’s a reason I got caught for stealing.”

Not quite the reason he must be thinking, but yeah, the reason does exist.

“I’m sure you can steal whatever you want if you try hard enough.”

“Easy to think,” you mutter, taking a long sip. “But some things aren’t a matter of strategy.”

“Oh? Pray tell, who could be standing between you and what you want?”

Your expression turns bitter, turning into what has to be a sharp glare as you let out all the resentment that has been festering from years of being nothing more than a distant friend to Scaramouche.

“You. You make me want things I can’t have.”

Scaramouche’s smile doesn’t change at that, and your heart sinks when you see how he doesn’t even think to ask what you mean.

He knows, you realize, staring hopelessly into his violet, unchanging eyes. He’s known.

God, that’s embarrassing. That the man you’ve been obsessed with since you joined this wretched organization knows you like him, knows you think about him day and night, knows you’d do anything for him—and he never bothered to say anything.

How humiliating.

This is rejection, isn’t it? This is his way of telling you to crush your hopes and move on because this is as far as you go: being an aid to his strategy, nothing more than a tool to advance his success.

You stand abruptly, not even sure what you’ll say in your shame when you head out—but, then you remember what he said earlier—and things begin to feel different.

I’m sure you can steal whatever you want if you try hard enough.

Your devastation turns incredulous, and you suddenly think about how you first learned that Scaramouche was engaged through some table talk among the low-level recruits. You’d believed it at the time, but Scaramouche is the kind of ass to spread those rumors so suitors won’t approach him, right? He’s the kind of man to consciously put up a distant facade to keep everyone he doesn’t like away, right? And he’s been inviting you every other night to talk about bullshit strategy you couldn’t care less about, keeping you close, if anything, and—

Ah, fuck.

Your face changes as you continue to stare at Scaramouche, trying to dissect his expression for a hint of what he’s thinking. Alas, it’s useless: he wears the perfect poker face, lips curled as he waits for you to make the next move.

Hesitant, you take a seat.

He does nothing in response, though you swear his grin widens the slightest.

And so with no encouragement but the unbridled courage of adrenaline running through your veins, you open your mouth and say things you should have said long ago.

[merakiui]

Please for the love of GOD, let Scarymouche and Idol!Reader kiss! I AM ON MY KNEES

It will happen...eventually.

[patxhwrk]

7 and streamer+reverse au (for the prompt thingy) childe please!!

you are welcome to do the rest as you please<33

I love ur work btw!! I keep smiling at them at the point its not funny anymore LOL love you take care of urself<3

You guys are so fucking sweet im going to cry i love yall too

Anyways, thank you! Its always nice to get feedback about my writing and knowing you guys like it makes me happy :)

Take care of urself too, king/queen/whatever the gender neutral term of it is because royalty doesnt sound catchy enough!!

-ˋˏ✄— "Haha what death flags???"

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳ Tartaglia x Reader [ Reversed + Streamer AU ! ]

Pronouns: they/them

"I'm 75% sure that's not going to happen."

.navigation. // .genshin impact masterlist.

"Chat!!" Childe all but screamed. His viewers rolled in, increasing in numbers as the chat gained speed. "I should put you all in slow mode."

But he didn't. Childe knew he wouldn't do that. He liked seeing his viewers interect with him, greeting him a hello as he waited for more viewers to receive the notification and enter the stream.

"How are you all?"

Many different replies rolled in, ranging from the usual polite 'good :)' and and to the unrelated and chaotic 'POGU', 'E', 'CATJAM CATJAM CATJAM' and other emotes.

"Haha! Do you know what we're doing today?"

And, as per usual, his chat exploded with 'GENSHIN!!', 'Simp for Y/n!', 'Cry about Y/n lore?', and 'OUR MENACE Y/N 😫'.

A smile graced Childe's lips. "Always so chaotic, huh, chat?"

A donation popped up.

"ScaryMouche donated 1$! 'U raised them, after all,'" it read.

"Aw, be a little more generous next time you insult me, Scara," Childe pouted, but shook his head nonetheless.

Opening the game, the sound of the opening filled his ears, and soon, the door built itself. He entered the game, and the loading screen took up his stream.

Cheering as the game loaded, he did a little dance with his current character, Y/n, a hydro bow user who specializes in all weapons but the bow.

Another donation popped up.

"Y/nScrunkly donated 20$! 'Look at them. Look at the scrunkly. The little menace. They are so adorable i want to punch them and kiss them.'"

Childe let out a quiet giggle, barely enough to let his viewers catch it.

After an hour, he had completed his daily commisions, wasted all his resin and more, and finished the current event. All while talking endlessly about everything and anything.

It was nice. Childe liked streaming, interacting with viewers and replying to donations. He liked having them talk in chat, or just watch in silence. He liked being someone's comfort streamer. Or uncomfort streamer, as long as they didn't actually mean it as a genuine insult.

About to say his goodbyes and end stream, he paused for a moment.

Another donation came up.

"HeyGurliHoldStill donated 25$! 'What do u think of Y/n's death flags?? O.0'"

He knew he couldn't avoid that question. He knew chat already saw his smile turn into a stiff, straight line.

"Haha, death flags? I don't know what you're talking about, chat!" He laughed, glancing at chat for a second, seeing the same things multiple times.

'Y/n death flags??', 'NOT THE SCRUNKLY NOO', 'guys let them die we want the angst haha', and many more.

"Guys, guys, calm down. I'm 75% sure that's not going to happen!"

His chat spammed 'denial' in many different ways.

He chuckled nervousy, already knowing his friends were tweeting about it.

─𖠄࿐

@ScaryMouche Tweeted!

'Hey @Tartaglia, aren't you going to say something about Y/n's death flags?'

Chuckling to himself, Childe tiredly ran a hand throuh his hair. The stream had ended hours ago, with him hurriedly saying goodbye, a nervous smile on his lips, his chat spamming him both questions and goodbyes.

He'll have to ignore those death flags for today. Now, he sat on his bed, a plush of Y/n's narwhal clutched close to his chest.

@Tartaglia Tweeted!

'Blocked. Blocked blocked blocked.'

—PATCHWRK !

[terminaxshowtime]

List of Names to Name Wanderer

made by me and my friends. mihoyo don't give us this power

Pissbaby

Scarymouche

Bowlcut Boy

Bowlcut Baddie

Deer

Emo

MCR fan

Venti 2

Motherless behaviour

Floaty

Windblade

Traveler 2: windblade edition

Heizou 2

Harbinger 69

Freddy mercury

Freddyboy

ANYTHING BUT THE GNOSIS!!!!!

Skinny jeans wearer

Friendless

no bitches??

small hat

*sticks tongue out*

short

Mullet boy

mascara man

WANDERHOY

babygirl

Scrunkle

twink

mouchie

iPad kid

Him

The entirety of Bohemian Rhapsody

the good kush

scaraboobs

feel free to add your own

[i-li]

! scaramouche users​

miscaramouche

scarasvu

scarymouche

8bitscaramouche

scaramour

care4mouche

ifscaramouche

all2scaramouche

like or reblog if you save

[haveaclock]

Scarymouche

[homoceroscaeli]

scarymouche

[centuriantalevevo]

A shit post on naming Scara

Me

Scaramouche

Albedo

Xiao

Alright you have a variety if names to choose from for what I will choose for you in game

I already don't trust this

Cry about it- anyways! We HAVE!!

Scaramouche-

No

Fuck you too then.... we got Scaramewmew, Ike, Scarymouche, TheMoucheTM, Fandango, Toast, Raw Toast, BEANZ, Hatsune Scara, Wowaka, Fuckass.... that's a quote on Fukase, a vocaloid...

What are literally ANY OF THESE NAMES??

This is why you don't allow them to name you or anything else

Let's see... Unknown Mother Goose... MASA... Scara... Feeps...

...

We can put Felippe instead of Feeps... Felippe is my cat.

I hate all of them

Well cry about it, your dumbass trusted me enough to have me name you, I'm still giving you a choice. This is what you got to choose from. Don't rush, you have time.

... Ike sounds the most normal

So be named after my oshi? Aight Ike it is then!

I was waiting to hear the reasoning behind the name...

Ike Eveland is their oshi, a English speaking VTuber they watch

God dammit...

You wanna be named catboi? I can do that!

NO!

THEN CHOOSE ONE OR I'M CHOOSING SCARA

Name him parentheses

FFFF-

[lord-of-pterodactyls]

I now must add some beautiful dialogue between scarymouche and the drunkard (i will just be using the initials of their names because i'm lazy)

S: Quit my job to join your emo boy band? You're delusional

V: You know you want to

S: I really do not

V: We have gossip meetings and you can write a diss track about your mother she can't do anything here.

S: ...

V: So, waddya say? You gonna join us?

S: Fine.

Kunikuzushi, the Wanderer.