#saw the story on yt i didn't pull for it

[soli-nepenthe]

Though Radiant Brilliance and Grasslands Romance are two distinct cards, I think they share in the idea of how Sylus/MC view or deal with challenges. In RB, we get to see a bit of Sylus's vulnerable side, especially learning that he has lost underground matches before, trying to be on equal footing with other challengers. In Grasslands, the probability of losing was also high (since he was competing against seasoned warriors in a different fighting style) but the need to win was also driven by MC. I think the story in Radiant Brilliance is sweet, but it also touches on the message that there is more to winning and losing (things that happen in life) as long as you have that special person at your side, a person who believes in you is what matters.

I'm probably rambling, but I enjoyed seeing a little more vulnerability from him on a similar theme.

[kerizaret]

Hello everyone and welcome once again to my brain! Today I want to ramble a bit about

✨️ Tsukasa and Rakunosuke (Emu's grandpa) parallels ✨️

Because I feel like we don't talk about them much. Or at all actually

Now, I'm not pulling this out of nowhere. It's quite literally stated at least once, outright, in the game, that Tsukasa is really similar to Emu's grandpa (or even twice – but the other time I'm unsure 100% whether its about Tsukasa specifically, which I'll get to later). That's not to mention the other little things throughout the stories that I think similar between the two

So here's just some thoughts I've had on the topic after rewatching some events, more or less cohesive

1) Tsukasa's PXL auditon & WMS speech

Starting at the very beginning, we've known ever since the wxs main story that there's something in Tsukasa that has drawn Emu in to him already the first time she's ever saw him, at his audition for PXL, which made her hire him herself. She says "found you" at that moment, as if she's been searching for someone exactly like him. Out of all the possible candidates who applied who she might've seen, why Tsukasa specifically?

It could be just about him boasting about making fantastic shows, which of course is a part of it. But I feel like this isn't all, that there was something else that she noticed, that maybe she didn't fully realise at that moment

Then later, in Wonder Magical Showtime, after Tsukasa's motivational speech, Emu specifically thinks back to that audition and how she felt something special there. And, most importantly, she thinks it as if she's talking to her grandpa – like he's somehow tied to it, to her realisation that Tsukasa is the one

Putting aside the fact they were fighting for Rakunosuke's park, which obviously makes Emu think back to him, there's something more. Emu doesn't think anything of the sort about Rui, even though he was the one who came up with the night show, or about Nene. Nor did she mention any kind of this strong feeling/conviction about having them on the Wonder Stage in the main story

She's focused on Tsukasa, because he's the one that brought all these people together and gave them the last push they needed to fight for PXL. He's the one they listen to, he who understands what this park was all about and why they need to save it. He's standing on the stage her grandpa built, looking at all those people working here, and he's leading them, telling them this dream CAN be made a reality and it's more important than anything else

And I feel like she could have looked at that and been reminded of her grandpa a bit, with how much he loved the park he built and brought people together with the same ideals and love and made dreams come true

2) Miles

Speaking of WMS, I'm sure we all remember Miles, the sorcerer Tsukasa played in the night show in WMS, and how he was a character very clearly based on Rakunosuke. It's not very surprising it's Tsks who got this role, but it's still interesting to me. It feels like no-one else would've been able to get this character right and neither would Emu as Shao with someone else playing Miles

I won't get into what "Miles" Tsukasa says in the play, because that's just the script and not a representation of Tsukasa himself, but I do want to draw attention to the specific scene where Emu's father is watching the night show and looks at Tsukasa, then says this:

This is the first time that – i suspect – Tsukasa is outright "stated" to be like Rakunosuke. Here I say "suspected" since I'm not 100% sure of it for two reasons. One of them being that as we know, the ensekai translation is sometimes often bad. For that I looked up the original text as well as an old translation of the event on YT to check for differences

The line ends up being similar in meaning, more or less, but a bit more vague. That also ties to my second doubt though, which is that Emu's father might be referring not to Tsukasa himself, per se, but rather to the character of Miles he's playing

I feel like both can make sense, in their own way (and the event is a Tsukasa focus for a reason, too), but for here I'm throwing it more as a hint than any kind of outright proof. Food for thought

3) Tsukasa and Rakunosuke's deams

Then, as we reach Popping in my Heart! and learn more of Rakunosuke from Riley's pov, there's another interesting thing that pops up. That is, the fact that Tsukasa and Rakunosuke share the same dream

And then, that's when Emu confirms what I've talked about before – that this whole time, she's felt something about Tsukasa being so reminding of her Grandpa

So Tsukasa has all this time "carried the same spirit" as Rakunosuke – which is possibly the reason why Emu has been feeling strangely drawn to him from the beginning

4) The Wonderland SEKAI

Hey. Hey. Remember this line?

(tl by tsukasa's #3 fan on YT)

Yeah, this one. The same reason why wxs even has "Wonderlands" in their troupe name

You know what else has Wonderland in its name?

That's right! Tsukasa's SEKAI!

Tsukasa's SEKAI. A different world that's created from his feelings, that's a place born from his desire to make everyone smile with his shows. A world that just recently expanded to include plushies representing all those different shows – different worlds – wxs created as a troupe. It's a world that Tsukasa, in a way, made by himself (albeit unconsciously)

Oh did I mention the Wonderland SEKAI is also, primarily, pre-wl, a theme park? With a big ass ferris wheel and several stages and a castle and a train and a merry-go-round, a rollercoaster and more? You know, kind of just like Phoenix Wonderland? Which was built by Emu's grandpa?

Do you ever think about that? That both Tsukasa and Rakunosuke "made" their own "Wonderlands"? That the SEKAI is so similar to PXL? Because I do

Anyway. Those were the main similarities or references I noticed, but I still have some few other miscellaneous thoughts i had aside from that that I'll sum up a bit quicker

Tsukasa and Emu's grandpa both care more about the shows (& pxl) themselves and the effect they have on people to make them smile than any kind of fame or recognition

A reminder, too, that despite the movie's popularity, nobody really knew that Rakunosuke worked on "Smiley" (or that it was even a Riley Entertainment movie at all)

There's also the fact that both tsks and rknsk get stuck more on the excitement they want their audiences to feel rather than on the technical sides or worries about how it would be possible – as seen with Rakunosuke convincing Riley to include all his dreams and ideas in "Smiley" without focusing as much on the budget and all to install that wonder in the viewers, and Tsukasa doing anything to perfect his acting, and also agreeing to most of Rui's stunts and experiments and production ideas as long as it gets the audience to become more immersed

I noticed as well that they're both people who wear their hearts on their sleeves, who easily get emotional and enthusiastic, who empathise a lot with the others' emotions and struggles, becoming happy when something good happens to them

^ he cried here. And later at the fan festa seeing nene sing confidently and happily he teared up again

And also just *gestures vaguely at pandemonium event and Rui's "tsukasa's friends' happiness is his own happiness" line*. Yeah

Most importantly, Tsks and Rknsk both care so, so much about shows ending with smiles and not tears

And overall about everyone smiling and being happy. Like Tsukasa telling Emu in the main story, on the ferris wheel, that when her grandpa meant making EVERYONE smile, it included Emu, too, and he wanted to make sure she's happy as well

There's also everything with Emu, too. The way she's very clingy with Tsukasa, always throwing herself at him (not that she isn't with everyone, but she does seem to jump at him the most often)

She's also implied to open up a bit more around him – in Smile of a Dreamer, when wxs expressed their worries about emu hiding her problems, KAITO implies that its unusual she "hasn't told EVEN Tsukasa"

And it's Tsukasa who first understood that, despite how it may seem that "she always is so optimistic and says whatever's on her mind", in the end "the bigger the problem, the less likely she is to talk" (paraphrased quotes from smile of a dreamer). And also underdstood what's the most important to her and how to give her a push to voice her worries to them

It's Tsukasa who Emu first got so scared of leaving their troupe and her behind

I simply feel like Emu is aware of the similarities her grandpa and Tsukasa share and, subconsciously, trusts him a lot and gets attached to him easily

Anyway. This is just a bunch of thoughts that came to mind that I wanted to share and hear your thoughts on maybe too. I love emukasa so much they have such a great dynamic, and I feel the implied similarities between Rakunosuke and Tsukasa add a lot to that too. I'm really curious if it'll be something they'll explore more in future events. Because I feel these parallels are there for some reason

[msviolacea]

Okay! Random thoughts and observations about Star Rail 2.2! Spoilers, obviously!

tl;dr - not as coherent as 2.1 was, story-wise, but SO MUCH LORE. SO MUCH. But honestly most of the below is random nonsense and shitposting.

I didn't think Xipe was the kind of god to go Catholic, but apparently they have confession? Huh.

Bravo to Hoyo writers for pulling off the "it was all a dream" gambit in a way that actually works.

I was willing to possibly buy that we were just getting a slightly disappointing easy-out right up until a) the IPC went "nah, we don't want the planet anymore" and b) Ratio and Screwllum were vaguely happy to work together. At that point, it was like "ahhhh, we're in a DREAM dream y'all."

Poor Sunday, radicalized by being an overly protective older sibling. Relatable, tbh. You know, except for the making yourself a giant supervillain mecha god. Though that's tempting some days, I won't lie.

On the other side of things, it did feel like a disappointing cop-out after spending SO MUCH TIME on his story in 2.1 to just be told "yeah, actually Aventurine just got rescued off-screen."

HOWEVER, kudos to Argenti for surfing into Penacony, immediately finding the forbidden dreamspace and rescuing an IPC ambassador, then rolling up to take 2nd place in an idol competition before fucking off to find more beauty or whatever. King shit. Bravo. Come back soon.

Speaking of the HSR husbando game, BOOTHILL. Who thinks pointing a gun in your face is a way to say hello and has a Plan C that's just "... guess we'll take hostages!" Stay forever, you insane space cowboy.

On a slightly related tangent, I loved the flashback exchange between Firefly and Blade, showing their relationship to each other as Stellaron Hunters. After all the Luofu nonsense, it's fun to see Blade as a weird older brother figure.

Another related tangent to the above: since I also watched some of the most recent Genshin patch on YT this week, shoutout to Daman Mills for having the "deep raspy voiced tragic murder hobo" to "ridiculous androgynous magician twink" range. [insert Patrick Stewart "Acting" gif here]

But back to Firefly, I think she had a nice showcase here, though I wish they'd given her more focus in the last bit instead of sorta-kinda-maybe-probably not killing her offscreen via a short Acheron speech. I assume she'll be back, given that she's dropping as a playable character next patch, but still. There was just a lot going on in this patch and not enough time to do everything they really needed to do.

However, they COULD have cut the idol competition, because that added absolutely nothing to the plot and only really existed because someone clearly went "huh, how do we fit more puzzles and trash fights here?"

We also needed more Robin. She was awesome, don't get me wrong, but again, I would have given up the stupid idol competition in favor of maybe getting more time to play her and not just Sparkle-as-Robin running around giving people ... doomsday buttons?

Speaking of which .. wtf? Like, those went NOWHERE. Maybe they're for later payoff, but given that she was explicitly telling people to use them during the concert ... it was weird.

Dan Heng: Listen my past life just cold clocked me over the head, I need time to process and not deal for a while, Imma stay out of Dream Disneyland and chill. Also Dan Heng: so, my friends are in trouble AGAIN, not like this isn't a "must be Tuesday" occurrence for the Astral Express crew, but my first instinct is to use this very important button to call the saner of my previous life's ex-boyfriends to bring an army to help.

Like, I'm CERTAINLY not complaining about the Jing Yuan cameo, even just as a dream, but that was a very quick response, Dan Heng. I see you. (PS: as long as we're giving VA shoutouts in this post, shoutout to Alejandro Saab for Jing Yuan's everything.)

Little detail I didn't catch myself, but saw someone online point out today - Welt gave the IPC the ammunition they need to take out the Dream Master. Early in the patch, he points out that the poker chip Aventurine gave us is actually a transmitter and recorder, and takes it with him to meet with Robin and Sunday and the Dream Master. At the very end, we see Aventurine playing with the chip, and Jade mentions that they obtained a recording "from your Trailblaze friend" that would help them on Penacony/with the Dream Master. So shoutout to Welt for ... well, deciding that space capitalism is preferable to crazy assholes who are trying to use innocent people to revive a god? I guess he's seen plenty of nonsense in his time, tbh, so I'm going to trust his judgement.

Speaking of Welt, Acheron's name drop was not the only Honkai Impact 3rd direct reference. It was an interesting touch for them to include Welt's "real"/original name in the credits sequences. Don't know if it's anything more than just an easter egg for HI3 folks, but still. Interesting.

Harmony Trailblazer is actually pretty strong. I'm definitely going to build mine.

All in all, I didn't enjoy this quite as much as the last patch, but it's the difference between like a 9.5/10 and an 8/10. Coherent self-contained stories mean a lot to me, but the lore and character stuff that was in this patch was A+, and I'm still digesting half of it.

[str33tydr1ft]

| "You have to say it back." | LATE Fathers Day | TTTE AU : Sodor's Dragons |

(I HAVE NO IDEA WHY IM GETTING SO MANY FATHERS DAY IDEAS BUT I SAW A CLIP ON YT ABT THOMAS AND GORDON MOMENTS AND A CLIP FROM ITSV SO- ENJOY)

<Thomas : Blue>

<Gordon : Purple>

If it wasn't for the big event today, it wouldn't have been another average long working day. No, it was Fathers Day. It was a common thing for humans to celebrate. On the other hand, not many engines could experience it. But there were a few who could.

Two of those engines are Henry and Gordon.

Gordon, the big pompus asshole that you can't help but adore, and his husband, Henry, who often forgets holidays that isn't Halloween or Christmas.

On this day, Henry was asleep, as per usual. He was often the last one to wake up, but the others didn't mind it. Gordon however ussualy woke up before Thomas and Percy. Those two were the last two to leave the sheds before Henry.

So when Gordon woke up, he smirked and naturally blew his whislte as loudly as he could (without fearing that he'd wake Henry up by accident since he's a heavy sleeper) . Percy and Thomas were startled and woke up, Percy nearly bashing his funnel over the top of the shed door with how high he managed to jump.

" Wake up, you two! You know what day it is? "

Thomas groaned while Percy was trying to get over his disorientation.

" Fathers Day, right? " Thomas growled out as he glared at Gordon.

Gordon, with the biggest smile on his face, " yup "

" oh wow wee how excited I am! "

Gordon rolled his eyes, deflecting Thomas' sarcasm.

---

Gordon was waiting at the station with the express. He had an idea. What that idea was, I couldn't tell you it since that would spoil the story.

When Thomas pulled up in platform 2 with his branchline train for the morning, he had completely forgotten about being so grumpy about the day focused around his dad.

" Hey old man, "

" Is that what you and Percy are calling me now? "

" maybe "

" As long as you two don't call Henry that, then I'm alright with it, " Gordon smiled as he spoke.

" I won't! Anyway, I can't thank you enough, "

" For what? "

" For taking me in when you found me, "

" well you were a little tiny thing stranded in some docks which turned into a graveyard afterall, "

" I know, but you saved my life, I can't thank you enough "

Gordon felt a tear trying to escape his eyes. He refused to give in, but he did appricate his sons words.

" Anytime, Kiddo, promise me you'll be safe when you take your train okay? "

" I will, "

" Love ya kiddo, "

Thomas just smiled and managed to get a minutesworth away from the station before he heard Gordons whislte. Then Thomas' grumpy mood suddenly returned to him again.

The perks of being a train, he managed to unhinge the wheel joints in his wheels so he was out of drive mode. He then turned around and glared at his father, making sure to uncouple from his coaches first.

" w h a t - "

" You have to say it back "

Thomas looked around, there were engines in the yard stopping what they were doing to watch what was happening, alongside everyone waiting for their trains at the station observing the two.

" But Dad- "

" You have to, " Gordons face said it all. He knew what he was doing.

" Dad litteraly everyones here, the passengers, James, Percy, Edward, everyone "

" I love you Dad "

" Dad please- "

" I love you Dad "

" Dad- "

" I. Love. You. Dad. "

" FINE- FINE FINE OKAY- "

Gordon stopped repeating what he wanted Thomas to say, and just looked at him with a smug look on his face.

" Dad. I love you. " Thomas' face said it all, too. He was embarrassed as all hell. Clearly wishing that didn't happen.

" Thank you, " Gordon said as he let off some steam and puffed away with his express, very proud of himself indeed.

Thomas just gritted his teeth as he watched Gordon leave, getting himself back on the tracks again before coupiling up to his coaches. Trying to block out the giggiling coming from the coaches, the station and from the kther engines whk saw the ordeal.

" Happy Father's Day, old man. " Thomas scoffed to himself before puffing away to run his branchline passenger service.

[gryffindorkxdraws]

I saw your post about a Taylor Swift Jackunzel story (and I jumped lol). Can you do "Everything has Changed"? I saw a sun and moon au vid from Hermuna Moon of yt that used that song. I wonder how'd you do a one-shot on that AU! I'm interested on reading the climax of that story where the Sun and Moon finally meet ^^

Song: Everything Has Changed

Word Count: 721

Summary: What would happen when the sun and moon meet?

Notes: i tried my best to follow your request, but i also wanted to make it a little bit different. just a little bit. but i kept in mind of the reunion and this short thing happened. enjoy! also i didn't edit this aha

video anon mentioned here

Rapunzel has heard stories of the Moon. Or rather, the boy who represents the Moon Kingdom. Every night, he would splatter the dark night into the sky and pull out the twinkles of the stars to accompany it. So the children wouldn’t be scared of the dark, she thought to herself, though she’d love to hear the boy’s own thoughts on it.

What he did was in contrast to hers. Where she represented the Sun Kingdom and threw the light back into the sky. A way to wake nature up and greet the day with a brand new tomorrow. So everyone gets energized to live their life, she giggled to herself, but, again, she’d like to know what the boy thought of it. Of her.

She’s heard so many stories of the boy that she felt like she already knew him. Met him even though they’ve yet to cross paths. It was like her mind had latched onto him, onto this moon boy, and didn’t want to let go. Always needing to be fed with any information she could get of him. She wondered then if the boy ever got curious about her.

Rapunzel snapped out of her thoughts when a rabbit hopped along the field. The sunset over the horizon was beautiful, but sad at the same time. It reminded her that her day time was almost up. But instead of slowly disappearing back into the Sun Kingdom like she normally would, she stayed. She stayed.

Questions undoubtedly ran through her mind as night slowly took over, but her guts told her to start running instead. So she did. Across the field as fast as she could. Towards what? Towards who? She didn’t know. At least until she saw someone running from the other end of the field. A boy with such striking white hair, and eyes so blue she felt she could fly in its hue.

The boy.

Jack.

The boy was Jack all along? Rapunzel held her breath, unable to bring herself to believe it at first.

With just one look at each other, a thousand memories flooded in their head. The very memories they both kept hidden in the dark because their people have told them it was useless to dwell in the past. Once, they were simply a shepherd boy and a princess of the Corona Kingdom from long ago. A shepherd boy and a princess who broke traditions together with their friendship. A friendship that should have lasted a lifetime, but was cut short when the boy drowned in the lake.

And now, here they were.

Both Rapunzel and Jack took a step forward, then another, before immediately making a run for it towards each other. Rapunzel could feel the pull of the Sun Kingdom now, and like hell was she going to disappear before she could reach him. In their last few steps, Rapunzel leaped forward with a yell, her heart bursting at the seams with how full it was from reaching him.

Years and years of mourning for Jack gave her this unnameable weight on her shoulders, and now she felt free of it from this very moment. Jack, on the other hand, thought she had long passed as a human, and to suddenly see her here made his heart full. Of life, of love, of everything he’s ever wished for if given one more chance.

"Jack!"

"Rapunzel!"

The two crashed into each other, their worlds finally, finally colliding, and Jack didn’t want to let her go. Not when he finally has her in his arms. Though he fell backwards from catching her and the two rolled on the field, laughing and crying and everything in between. Until Jack noticed she was fading when she pinned him down.

“I’ll find you again, I promise.” Rapunzel whispered, holding his face with both hands.

“Not if I find you first.” Jack whispered back, smirking as a way to make her smile, and she did.

He sat up and held her close before pulling her in for one more hug, breathing her in like she smelled of sunshine and flowers (she did). As Rapunzel slowly faded away just as the sunset was closing in on fully setting for the night sky to take over, the two made promises to find a way to meet once more.

[jeahreading]

I'm gonna post this really good story I just read on yt (take the reality of thsi story with a grain of salt)

"My brother went missing years ago, I distinctly remember my parents interviewing for the news in our living room. I think I know what happened to him.I was very young when he went missing, i barely remember him, but I do remember that I loved him a lot, he would pull me around our block in a wagon. Most kids his age didn't do that. The days before he disappeared, I remember him staying home and babysitting me. I stayed in my room and played Nintendo 64. Throughout the day a guy came over, I remember him, he was, older, almost our dad's age. My brother made me go into my room whenever I heard the doorbell. Later after the guy left, my brother would ask me not to say anything about the guy. With my brain only being focused on video games and extra dessert at that age, I agreed, I didn't care, nor did I comprehend the gravity of the situation. The day before he disappeared I remember the older guy coming over. I was in the kitchen and remember looking up and seeing him kiss my brother. They hugged. They didn't care that I saw them, the older guy waved at me and I waved back .

Then I kept watching cartoons. I fell asleep on the couch and woke up to my brother whispering outside our front door. "Don't worry, he's asleep," he said. The older guy said something I couldn't hear. Then my brother said something I couldn't make out, but I made out the words "visit them" or maybe he said "visit him"? Either way, I know the word 'visit' was in his sentence. The man raised his voice and said no. Then I heard "plan" and "city." Then I fell asleep again. The next morning--the day he disappeared--my parents were at work. My brother was acting very strange. I remember he kept checking the clock. In the afternoon, I remember him picking me up and asking me if I wanted to go in the wagon. I was too hooked on Nintendo 64 and said no. He almost begged me and I said no again. Then he told me he had to run to our neighbor's house for something, I don't even remember what he said. I said okay. He reminded me to not open the door for anyone, only mom and dad. I shouted at him "OKAY!" because Super Mario was getting on my fricking nerves and he wasn't helping. He gave me a hug and told me he loved me and left. He never came back. All these years--decades--later and I think he was in love with that man. I know he was. The memories randomly came flooding back to me earlier, I'm not quite sure why. But it has been taking over my thoughts lately. I can't sleep because I keep thinking about it. I think my brother left with that man and they ran away together. Or maybe something worse happened. But I don't think that's the case. My freshman year of college, I was part of a sports team that got national recognition. I remember my team's picture was on ESPN and with our university's name. A few days later, I got mail at my dorm. It was a gift basket. I thought it was from my parents, so I didn't read the card. I threw it away immediately and ate what was in it, but it was nothing but candy. Nerds, jolly ranchers, Tootsie Rolls and Hershey's Kisses. I called my dad and thanked him for the gift basket and he said he didn't send one, neither did mom. Then I got to thinking: all of those candies were what I used to eat as a kid.

Literally all I ate for the earliest years of my life were those candies. I tried to find the card, but I couldn't. Then I began to think about how my brother would wheel me in the wagon to the gas station close to our house so I could get candy after dinner, even though it was a punishable-by-death "no-no" from mom. Months later, during Christmas, I got an unmarked Christmas card. The only thing written on it was a :) smiley. Since then, I've heard nothing. No one I know sent that card. I have never responded. I wonder, every day, if he's out there. I have never told anyone this. When the police asked me what happened that day, I told them that he went to the neighbor's because that's all I remembered, honestly. It destroyed my parents. My mom became addicted to painkillers and my dad has had three extra-marital affairs (which, I know this tragedy is no way an excuse to cheat, but it sure didn't help). It has ruined our family, and maybe my brother knows what he did. Maybe he regrets it and knows he can't come back home. But if I could see him today, I would just want to tell him that he is always welcome in my home. I love you so much, brother. We have so much catching up to do. Please come home. Please.

UPDATE 1 - April 12, 2016: Title: My parents kept my brother a secret from me These past few weeks have been insane. I posted on here before....my brother went missing a long time ago. I thought he ran away from home. Long story short, I got into contact with some detectives that our family has known since my brother went missing. When I started asking questions, they told me that my brother was no longer on any missing persons registry. When I asked what that meant, they told me that he was removed per my parent(s) request. I asked my parents--my dad, actually. My dad ignored me. My mom told me my brother is alive and okay ("as far as she knows"). They found my brother years ago--a very, very long time ago--and found out he was living with another man. He's gay, and it disgusted my parents. He tried reaching out to them. They told him they didn't want anything to do with him and that I didn't remember him and wouldn't want to see him..... I went ballistic. My parents weren't fazed by it. They sincerely hate my brother for who he is--for being gay. They kept him a secret from me all my fricking life. My brother missed the birth of his nephew, he missed my wedding, graduations, EVERYTHING. just because of my parents. they lied to me. I've been able to get a phone number and contact information from police officers. My brother left it all open in case anyone from our family wanted to contact him. i still can't work up the nerve to call him.

[UPDATE 2 - May 7, 2016] Title: I met my brother that was "missing"! The day after I made my last post, I woke up and called into work. I told my wife (who is essentially my confidant and I tell her everything) the whole story. She wasn’t really surprised; she’s not a fan of my parents much. But like many of you, she told me to call the number I was given for my brother immediately. She insisted on it. She took herself and my son out for a day together so I could be alone to talk with him. I dialed the number about seven times before I actually pressed the “call” button. It started ringing and I hung up. Then I got frustrated at myself and called the number back. It rang and rang and I got a voicemail, but it was the automated voice, not anyone else’s. I didn’t leave a voicemail. I thought the whole thing was ridiculous. I called my wife and told her to come home and she refused until I had talked to someone on the other end of the phone. About an hour of pacing and drinking two glasses of scotch at 1 o’clock in the afternoon, I called the number again. It rang three times. I panicked. I hung up. But this time, the number was calling me back. I swear to whatever God(s) above, I thought my heart was going to stop. I almost threw up right there. I answered the call. The first thing I heard on the other end of the line was a guy laughing in the background. There was wind on the phone.

The person on the other end was outside and it was windy. “Who is this?” It was his voice. I knew that voice. It was my fricking brother. My brother! Who had been gone for my entire life! I covered my mouth with my shaking hands and just sat there. He kept asking me who it was. The guy in the background was trying to talk over him. He hung up on me. I called him back right away. He answered again. Me being a creepy a**, the first thing I said after decades of not seeing him and thinking he was dead, I blurted: “I got your number.” He asked me who I was and what I wanted. I said, “It’s me.” There was a really long pause. I thought the call had dropped. Then I heard him tell someone to turn the radio down and roll the window up. The sound of wind stopped… and then he asked me my name. I told him and he said that I was lying. I told him I got his number from the missing children’s network and detectives. I heard him gasp. He asked me what color shoelaces he wore to a picnic when we were kids, and I remember my mom getting mad at his orange laces with blue shoes. It was the last time we were together as a family. I could tell he was crying. The first thing he asked me was: “Where are you?” and I told him I lived a few hours away from home. Without hesitating, he told me, “I’m coming.” He went straight to the airport without any luggage, bought a plane ticket, and flew straight to me. We stayed on the phone with each other the whole time. When he was walking through the gate, I knew who he was right away. He is middle-aged; salt and pepper hair, muscular. He looks just like our dad, only better. I know if I told him that, that would make him mad. I literally pushed an old lady out of the way and I just hugged him. He’s about two inches taller than me. He was able to pick me up. He was crying, I was crying. I was having a breakdown. We went to a bar at the airport. He wouldn’t let me out of his sight. He kept holding onto my arm. He kept telling me how unreal it all was. He apologized to me. He kept crying, telling me he felt horrible. I told him to forget everything and tell me about his life. He’s married. His husband is a doctor—a pediatric oncologist. They live in the Pacific Northwest. They have two children—girls, 12 and 8. He works as a legal consultant and has his own firm. He has an amazing life. He told me that he thought I hated him and wanted nothing to do with him. We sat at the bar for hours. Literal hours. I think we sat for about six hours before I begged him to come home and meet my wife. We got home, and my wife was a mess. She hugged him and insisted he stay with us. At this point, his husband was going insane and kept calling him. He had no idea what was going on. He thought he had eloped or something. It was crazy for a couple of days until everything was explained and out in the open. My son and my brother were like two peas in a pod. Honestly, I never wanted children. My son was an amazing accident, but I’m not good with kids. I’m always afraid I’m going to break them. But my brother is a pro. Kids love him. He stayed with us for two weeks. And in two weeks, everything about my life changed. His husband and two daughters flew in to stay with us. My brother-in-law and my two nieces. My family. They were my family. They are my family.

[rocketmuse]

I thought I'd share my playlist for the anniversary of the boathouse kiss. :)

Song translations, MANY thoughts, and timeline under the break.

Noise warning for song 19, Hinahanap-Hanap Kita. 4:23 to the end. Loud high pitched beeps.

YouTube music version to be made soon.

Translations for foreign songs:

Ewan [Dunno] — Apo Hiking Society — Filipino/Tagalog

Amour plastique [Plastic love] — Videoclub — French

Panalangin [Prayer] — Apo Hiking Society/Moonstar88 — Filipino/Tagalog

Hinahanap-Hanap Kita [I'm Looking For You] — Rivermaya — Filipino/Tagalog

This is a collaborative playlist made with my friend.

Thought Good Old-Fashioned Lover Boy would be a good starter song. Something about the music. Represents a good start of Alec persuing Maurice, like, hey, I can be yours... Whatcha doin'?

I added Puppy Princess because of the chorus but I know some people don't like that song so... You can skip if you'd like. KISS MEEEEE KIISS ME WITH YIIR EYESSS CLOSED . ALL I WANT IS YOU YEAH YOU. TELL ME I'M NOT FUNNY TELL ME I'M LEGIIIIT

Ewan. OH MY GOD this song is so them. Alec cares for Maurice, and doesn't like not being taken seriously or being treated badly and brushed off.

"I don't know why you're like that, you're difficult to talk to and you're a snob" COME ON IS THAT NOT THEM — Just a smile from you, and I'll be in heaven. Please give me a response, anything but "No idea"... What a perfect representation of Alec's continuous persuit of Maurice, always talking, always trying...

I could go on with every lyric.

Edit: I just realised this song fits so well for Alec's letters and meeting at the museum. Must resist the urge to add the same exact track twice.

So about Touch Me... Some of the lyrics apply better in other versions. Spotify just has this version tho. Touch me, just like that.

All I've Ever Known. Maurice discovered so much that night about touch and sharing and being with someone. He wants to be with Alec. "All I've ever known is how to hold my own, but now I want to hold you too. [Hold you close, I don't wanna ever have to let you go. Hold you tight, I don't wanna to back to the lonely life.]" Alec opened up his eyes and he'll never be the same.

Can't Help Falling in Love With You. 'Did you ever dream you'd a friend, Alec? ... Someone to last your whole life...' 'Alec, you're a dear fellow and we've been very happy.'

I'd Like To Walk Around In Your Mind was added from Maurice's perspective. Perhaps it fits Alec too...

I think Love At First Sight has the double meaning of the literal title, as well as "wouldn't you like to kiss her" perhaps being... Something Maurice would hear.

I Don't Dance. Based on this post/edit. Please watch this video oh my God.

Pink in the Night. Alec yearns for Maurice in the boathouse. He hasn't come. He hears his heart breaking tonight.

Every lyric is perhaps pulled straight from Alec's brain, to be honest. I remember seeing a post with this song in other contexts with them too. So yes, a few meanings.

Amour plastique. Alec reminiscences on the night in the Russet room. Why hasn't he come?

In my mind, everything goes wild. I lose myself in your eyes. I drown myself in the vagueness of your loving gaze.

And at night I cry tears that stream down my cheeks. I think of you only when the days ends, only when my sad demons descend upon my mind, into the bottomless abyss.

Waiting in the boathouse at night, when the day ends.

I ring out in kisses all down your chest. Lost in the avalanche of my heart astray. Who are you? Where are you?

The moments of then repeat in his mind. Where is Maurice?

I suppose Hopelessly Devoted To You and I'm A Fool To Want You are self explanatory. Maurice should really come... Alec really toughed it out, 2 days he spent in the boathouse, really wanted to see Maurice, really knew they had something, and doesn't want to be treated like a dog. Generally, his 1st letter.

Moon Song. My friend said they added it as a general love song. — Why do you treat me like this? Why didn't you come to the boathouse? — Alec's 2nd letter as a whole. Plus bits of 1st.

And you pushed me in, and now my feet can't touch the bottom of you. ... So I will wait for the next time you want me, like a dog with a bird at your door.

Ewan would fit here tbh.

Panalangin. My only prayer in this lifetime: to be beside you, to be together with you, that's my prayer.

"I since cricket match do long to ... place both arms round you and share with you, the above now seems sweeter than words can say."

And this heart won't allow if you will be away from me, my love, please listen.

It also fits the end of museum.

I Want You. Maurice, can you come to the boathouse already? Alec has no power to teleport you there. I hold one card that I can't use.

I found you. I found the door, but when I stepped through, there was no floor. He found Maurice, bit he's not being here for Alec.

You're coming back And it's the end of the world We're starting over And I love you, darling And I am done, dear

Alec wishes this would happen. Also, he does come back later and they love again over, and "it is finished".

Credit for suggesting the next two songs goes to @beatle-capaldi!!! He also wrote was in quotations!

English Summer Rain

The Most Radical Thing To Do

Hinahanap-Hanap Kita. 1st letter, he's looking for Maurice. Thinking about them together.

In my thoughts and dreams, in every turn of destiny, I look for you. Also applies to that hotel/post-hotel feeling. I look for you, even if I try to forget you, saying goodbye, looking back...

Wildest Dreams. They think a lot of each other. They share once more. But they must say goodbye. Alec saw this coming. Maurice hopes that Alec will remember him like this.

I Hear a Symphony. Alec truly opened up Maurice's eyes. Maurice was meant to be with him. He helped Maurice, changed his life. But now Alec is leaving on ship... Or is he? The symphony leads into...

An orchestral sountrack. The Boathouse. Unfortunately the Maurice soundtrack is not on spotify. It's on my personal YouTube music version. I added it because it just captures the boathouse the only way the sountrack itself can.

The Word of Your Body (Reprise). MLM people have moment of romantic tension, which culminates in confessions of love. Just had to add it. "Haven't you heard the word of your body?" perfectly describes Alec gifting and showing Maurice the wonder of truest physical affection and love. He lets Maurice be okay with himself, and again, changes everything. Every lyric is perfect.

Also, sorry JBW, I like other versions more... Too bad Spotify is mean.

I See The Light. Yeah. Every lyric. Maurice is Rapunzel. Movie Blond too. Both the morning at Russet room and the museum. And the world has somehow shifted. All at once everything is different, now that I see you. "By now they were in love with each other consciously."...

Suddenly Seymour. Suddenly see more, yeah? Clive = ass and someone gives him affection for once, wow! Sidenote, I want to sing this with them and their accents... Suddenly SCUDDER...

Helpless. Musical theatre songs seem to be good retellings of their love story. It's why they belong in post boathouse. Summaries and retellings. They're also good at conveying love they'd feel for each other in general, all times ever. Like loving men, retelling a story.

I'll Cover You. Cute love song feat. gays. I like to imagine them dancing around, declaring their love and devotion for each other. Walking and dancing around like in the original scene, sometime post canon. In my own imagination, I thought of Alec as Angel and Maurice (Christopher) as Collins.

Video Games. They must love spending time together. I thought this to be Maurice POV. Only worth living if somebody is loving you I mean, come on.

It's you, it's you, it's all for you. Everything I do. I tell you all the time, heaven is a place on Earth with you.

Un sospiro. I headcanon that Maurice picks up the piano and plays for Alec. Perhaps he picked it up bc of/after Clive, but now can play it for someone who gives a shit.

Something about the melody reminds me of them. And then it gets more intense... A bit like the passions of love, showing up in sharing and touch and more, too.

Liebestraum. I mean, it means love dream/dream of love. I just had to. Also I just like Liszt.

Take Me Up With You, Dearie. This song is just so sweet... So soft... Edwardian to boot... I love how quintessentially 1909 it is. Discovered it in a YT video. The thought of them getting married makes me cry. This song in general makes me want to cry, it's so romantic, tender, and exudes my favourite era...

Let us float, float, float through the clouds, and just have a lot of fun. We'll go up, up, up as two and then come down as one.

Put Your Head on My Shoulder. We Belong Together. I always imagine Maurice and Alec slowdancing to songs that come on the radio together, when the 1950s hits... Alec probably rests his head on his shoulder as this plays and they dance...

I'm using a lot of ellipses, am I secretly Rupert Graves?

Welcome to the 70s and 80s. They love dancing together and being with each other. Now, Panalangin can be a happy song. My only prayer for this lifetime ... To be together with you. And this heart won't allow if you will be away from me.

Just the Two of Us. What a nice, vibey song. Great title, great scenario of them dancing to this...

Tiny Dancer. Your Song. MLM people in the 70s + Radio, being happy and in love with each other. — I just thought I should add some Elton. A different friend, and I, like him. Maurice sings to Alec, "And you can tell everybody this is your song." That I put down in words how wonderful life is with you in the world.

Electric Love. Fun fact: this song got me to share the playlist. Got me thinking about them and their anniversary again. The funky busy instrumental describes well their passionate love. The highs of electric LOOOOOOVE describe the intensity of them.

Alt text continued: themselves together under and the love. And the love. The song has its own tension and it perfectly pictures their own tension. So yeah, this is THEIR song quite literally.

Sorry if my music taste is perhaps basic. I just made it for when I hear songs that are Them.

Falling for Ya. Alec falls for Maurice. "I saw you when you first drove up, Mr Hall..." Something about Maurice, right? Plus really nice vintage vibes with the music. The bit about Into your arms and it's a secure sure sounds like Maurice. Awh, they're falling for *each other*...

Rainbow Connections. Gay and bi people. Marriage. Everything that Maurice and Alec went through to get here, where they were meant to be. Clive. Working for Clive. Leading up to now.

All the things that had to go right, all the things that had to go wrong, that lead us to the place where we were going all along.

On the YT version there's a soft/jazzy cover of Panalangin here. Because they're old and spending time together and being happy. What a throwback, a defined meaning in their lives over time.

Still Into You. After all these decades... Old and grown, together... True soulmates... Two men can defy the world... Maurice and Alec still roam the greenwood. Imagine Maurice meeting Alec's mom in this context. If only.

Postmodern Jukebox cover, because they are a quintessentially 20th century couple. They exude vintage.

Some piano playing for Alec. Soft, tender, romantic, emotional, true. Feels like nighttime. Feels like Maurice and Alec. And a throwback to the pre 1914 world as well. Claire de Lune feels like... A credits of life piece. Time spent in the early 1980s. Nocturne feels like that too, but more romantic. Smidge less nighttime. Ah yes, Gymnopédies. The truest credits feel of them all. None of these actually are credits for Maurice and Alec, but I struggle to find the word for this feeling. But yeah. These all have Them vibes to me. Piano of the time just does I suppose. Glad to be reminded of them at any time.

What a long playlist. Like going through almost their whole lives together. 1:52 hrs. Almost like a movie. Imagine that. A full movie of THEIR lives... But leaving to the imagination was a good thing. Led to this such action. Thank you E.M. Forster.

Timeline:

1. Pendersleigh

4. & 5. Russet Room. Night, then Morning

9. Cricket

10. Boathouse Nights

18. The Museum

20. The Hotel

21. After

23. The Boathouse

24. They Still Roam the Greenwood

I just like to imagine them dancing to songs on the radio, for decades to come...

[irishseeeker]

The Lady Whistledown issue in the show will be much more interesting and FUN! I'm here for the drama!!!! Eloise's season will have the consecuenses of the reveal as side plot and I'm all for the oldest Bridgerton bros to take the wheel, the show made Eloise and Benedict the closest to each other so I wouldn't be surprise if Anthony lets Benedict handle the Phillip/Eloise situation while he make his best with the whole Whistledown (bc there's no way the show Bridgertons will be happy about it)

Hi anon! I am so here for the drama as well. I think they'll really throw a curveball into the future seasons and I can't wait to see what it is. That's a v good point-Eloise's season will have to focus on that as the book was so frustrating as if Penelope hadn't said a lot of bad things about everyone? It wasn't all bad but especially in the show-she's hurt a lot of her closest friends and family.

I'm really hoping we see Anthony have a close relationship with Francesca, Eloise, Hyacinth or Gregory in S2-my hope is it's Francesca as she was barely in S1 and she's old enough to have more mature conversations. They need to build her character more as well.

I love the Benedict and Eloise's friendship. The Bridgerton boys crashing into Philip's house to fight him and rescue Eloise was the highlight of TSPWL and I loved Eloise/Anthony's moment in the study, and how Anthony talks about Kate <3 Anthony will definitely have to take charge of the Whistledown aftermath.

So excited to see what's in store for us! I saw Chris VD said he was in LA editing the first two episodes which is a really good sign? I don't know a lot about the post-production process but I imagine it takes months and months and Netflix have a habit of pushing out shows anyway! I wish it would come out at Christmas but I'd say we're looking at April 2022 earliest, maybe even Summer.

The fact it got multiple Emmy nominations is so good but tbh, Rege's was a popularity nomination rather than an acting one. I do think Simon's story and his trauma from his relationship with his father was not done well in the show and he didn't have a lot to work with but it just isn't Emmy worthy. If Rege got one, it's very unfair Phoebe has been snubbed yet again like she has since Bridgerton came out-all the attention has gone to Rege and it's not been very fair. I'd be saying the exact same thing about Phoebe as well, it wasn't an Emmy worthy performance but she definitely deserved it more than Rege did if someone had to be nominated.

I don't know if this is me snooping for drama but I noticed that all of the cast congratulated the show for the best drama but no one directly congratulated Rege? I really wonder if he just didn't get along with the cast or something or his exit has left bitter feelings.

I was very surprised when I saw his nomination. Having him in a category with the likes of Josh O'Connor, Matthew Rhys and Billy Porter for Bridgerton? He is a very good actor but this was not an Emmy worthy performance at all, I saw him in Roots and he was ten times better. Josh has the win already for the Crown, he was phenomenal in that. I adore Bridgerton but I wouldn't have given a nomination to any of the actors except Adjoa Andoh.

I don't know how this year's nominations will impact next years, the Emmys can be funny-but I have watched nearly everything Jonathan Bailey has been in and seen some of his stage work on YT and the man has won an Olivier! He's so bloody talented and I love him. I've seen some of Luke Thompson's stage work on Youtube as well and the man is talented. Out of the main cast, I think Johnny, Luke Thompson and Claudia Jessie are the most talented actors.

Anthony's storyline is an excellent opportunity for raw, emotional acting that I think Jonathan will be able to pull off if it's good writing. Jonathan B also has great range and he was hilarious in Crashers so the frustration and arguments with Simone are going to be very fun to watch as his expressions and brooding were hilarious in S1. He's the main main this season so he's going to have a big opportunity to showcase his talent. I've only seen Simone in Sex Education and she's hilarious in it but it's a small role and it's not enough for me to have an opinion really on her acting yet! I think she's amazing and from the praise she's been getting from Chris and the cast, I think she's going to be a brilliant Kate. The two of them on screen are going to be electric and the chemistry is going to be off the charts. This is her big break and I’m so excited for her, she deserves it so much and a good few actors get nominations from their big breaks and I would be thrilled to see it!

Luke Thompson could do very well in his season as well but there's definitely not as much to work with it as Anthony's storyline but they'll definitely give him something more. Claudia is incredibly expressive and absolutely hilarious-I can't wait to see what she does with Eloise and what they have in line for her, I'm guessing it's just hunting for Lady Whistledown.

I hope I don't sound negative here, I do adore the cast and they are all very talented! I really rambled on here haha, apologies! Hope you're having a good day anon :)

[shiroandblack]

Finwë, the Progenitor of the 'Fins'

[Disclaimer: what you are about to read are basically my thoughts and interpretation of Finwë. So if you have different thoughts and opinions that's perfectly fine]

Oh, and I'm totally not doing this because I'm procrastinating on the Fëanor thought-vomit I have going on in my head. Pfft, absolutely not!

Finwë, High King of the Noldor, Daddy to Fëanor, Findis, Fingolfin, Lalwen, and Finarfin (not that kind of daddy, get yer minds out of the gutter), husband to both Míriel and Indis, the Ned Stark of the Silmarillion, (depending on who you ask) the Fin to Elu's Finelwë -

I should stop.

First of all, we have no idea where this guy came from (I think?). He just suddenly popped out as an ambassador who basically went out with his buddies (OG Goldilocks and Tall Boy) to scout Valinor and see if the elves should move there or not. Prior to that, Finwë is not mentioned anywhere. People are generally divided if he was Tata's son as was Ingwë being Imin's son and Elwë being Enel' or if he's Unbegotten. Some also headcanon him as an orphan with his parents gone via Morgoth Kidnapping which was why he was chosen as an ambassador. I mean, magical guy on horse saying he'll take their society somewhere? I wouldn't really send the heirs or chieftains, I'd send someone competent enough to be a diplomat but ultimately no great loss to the tribal society of Cuiviénen (my god did I spell that right) if magical guy does pull a Dark Rider. Personally I do think that if he was indeed an orphan, it would explain some things in particular, like his want for many children and just a big family in general.

Anyways, the three go on their joy trip to Valinor and come back and go like "come, come, there are two pretty trees and no Dark Rider". I personally would have gone because of the no Dark Rider part but hey, if you like shiny, glowing trees and that's your main motivation, no judgement. Right after that, we don't know what happens to Imin, Tata, or Enel. Working on the assumption that the three are different people to the three '-wë's then they could have become Avari since the Avari are Tatyar and Nelyar. Interestingly, the Minyar all go and there is no more mention of Imin despite he was chieftain of all chieftains and then suddenly Ingwë is High King of all Elves? I'm gonna go with @squirrelwrangler's Klingon route here from their story 'Of Ingwë Ingweron' because I think there should be more depth to Ingwë and on a completely irrelevant note I have had a crush on 'the boy who would be Ingwë' since I started reading. You probably didn't need to know that, but now you do :)

(As you can see, I'm being very objective.)

BACK TO THE MAIN POINT. THIS IS A POST ABOUT FINWË. So anyways, the Great Journey happened and for some reason he and Elwë decide to meet up in a forest to do what nobody knows. Anyways, Elwë got skadooshed by Melian and Finwë went to Aman forever regretting the fact that he never got to do Elwë - I MEAN DO WHATEVER HE AND ELWË PLANNED in the woods of Nan Elmoth.

There he got married. Now, this is where I actually stop making fun of Finwë (yeah, no) and give you my interpretations and analysis which none of you have asked for but I'm doing anyways. So right off the bat, even when Míriel is obviously tired from giving birth to the baby who is his own crematorium - sorry, I meant Fëanàro - Finwë goes like "oh he's so pretty, I'm sure our other kids will be just as pretty". Which goes to show us that Finwë likely wanted an armada of kids right from the start. Y'all know what happens next. Point is, Míriel's dead and gone and Finwë is understandably a Sad Boy™.

Now, he also exhibits a certain impatient streak after Míriel dies. Surely he knew that the more he bothered Míriel about "hey, when are you gonna come back?" the more obstinate Míriel would be about not returning. I say he is impatient because he is an elf. He technically has all the time in Arda to wait for Míriel to return, but curiously he doesn't wait. Now, Fëanor was born in YT 1169 and Fingolfin in YT 1190 and since one YT is about 10 solar years (I'm pretty sure it's 9.8 years ish but I suck at maths so please have mercy on me) that means that Fëanor was around 200 years old when Fingolfin was born and we know Findis is elder. 200 years for an elf is not long at all, hell to the elven perception of time Finwë marrying Indis is probably like someone going out dating after 40 days of abstinence after a break up. This means that he married Indis relatively quickly after Míriel died, which shows that he was very eager for the marriage to happen.

Why? Was it because he knew Míriel wouldn't return for a very long time? Or was it because he wanted more kids? Or maybe that impatience is just intrinsic to Finwë's character? I actually don't know what to make of his motivations regarding this, so I'd love to hear anyone's opinions.

Finwë supposedly fell in love with Indis when he was going to visit Ingwë and saw her singing and the light was golden and Indis glowed and yeah. Prior to that, they most likely met in Tirion or even in Cuiviénen as Indis was close kin to Ingwë so I highly doubt that this was their first meeting and Indis was in love with Finwë since the early days of when the Vanyar and Noldor still stayed together in Tirion. This does make me wonder that even when Finwë was married to Míriel, were there seeds of feelings towards Indis? No, I am not saying he had an affair with Indis while married to Míriel, but you can feel attracted to someone even while married to another. But considering Finwë's favouritism towards Fëanor, I don't think this was the case and he probably began falling in love with Indis when he saw her singing and being basked in golden light. I do wonder what would have happened if he saw her picking her nose instead but hey, elves don't pick their noses in the Silm because all the nose dirt is removed by the sheer amount of times they must've cried in the First Age. Snotty crying ftw.

Many people in-universe seem to think that his second marriage was a mistake, but I do not think his marriage per say was a mistake. To me Finwë had the right to move on from Míriel, but what I don't agree with was that the Valar basically locked her up in Mandos for eternity. But this is a point of conflict that I feel I should address in a separate post about the Valar. In any case, what I think was the mistake was Finwë's impactful favouritism of Fëanor and his failure to reconcile Fëanor and his children by Indis. As there are a lot of external factors to him being unable to make his kids get along, I will be focusing more on the negative effects of his favouritism.

Finwë's marriage to Indis seems almost like a spontaneous decision, I don't think he actually sat Fëanor down and explained things to him quite well. After all, in Fëanor's mind Indis is the reason his mother is forever dead which is not really the case. Finwë wanted to marry Indis and Indis wanted to marry Finwë. It takes two to make the relationship work, after all. But despite Indis giving him what he wanted which is more children and a big family in general, Finwë still favoured Fëanor. Now I do get favouritism because everyone has favourites, but Finwë's favouritism only served to create more strife between Fëanor and Fingolfin. With one child, he lavishes praise and attention to the point that it's detrimental to Fëanor's growth as a person and with the other children, Fingolfin felt ignored enough to tailor his entire life into proving that he is more worthy to be Finwë's heir to - for a lack of better word - get his father to look at him the same way Finwë looks at Fëanor.

I don't doubt that Finwë loved his kids. I think he did love both Fëanor and his children by Indis, but the thing is . . . his actions always show that he loved Fëanor more. And I think that must have been devastating for his other children and what was the worst in my opinion is that Finwë doesn't seem to realise this. This could be a form of selective ignorance on Finwë's part or it could simply be that Finwë felt that he was giving equal attention to his children and that Fëanor needed more attention because he didn't have a mother. This is a logical thought process for him, but just because something seems logical it doesn't mean it's the right thing. Personally, I think Finwë's feelings towards Fëanor revolve around love and guilt and that guilt over denying Fëanor a birth mother makes him put Fëanor on a pedestal above his other children.

Now I'm gonna dive in to the circumstances up to his death. Prior to the infamous 'point-a-sword-at-traitorous-half brother' incident, the Noldor already had factions brewing under each of Finwë's sons. Which means that there were different groups supporting different sons (I'm just gonna give this quick glance because Noldorin elf politics and succession matters requires its own post honestly), both Fëanor and Fingolfin's group were advocating for these two princes to be Finwë's heir while Finarfin's most likely stayed neutral as throughout the text Finarfin has shown no real desire for kingship as his brothers (well, little did he know that his mother-name would come true in an arguably sad way). What is very interesting is the fact that Fingolfin thought he could be king after Finwë to begin with, which suggests to me that Finwë hadn't formally declared an heir. Usually it is assumed that the eldest son is heir and there would be no formal declaration needed, but the thing is Finwë had sons by a different queen and what's more is Fingolfin and Finarfin were the children of the ruling queen. Why he didn't do a formal declaration, I do wonder, because while it may have embittered Fingolfin for awhile I do think that if Fëanor had been assured of his position then maybe the two could have had some semblance of a healthy relationship. Maybe he viewed it as causing a greater rift between his children?

Now we finally get on to the sword pulling incident. We all know what happens, so I'll just skip on to the aftermath. Fëanor is exiled by Manwë, Finwë views this as an insult to his authority. I do agree that this can be viewed as that because as a Noldo, Fëanor should answer to the king of the Noldor and Manwë is exiling someone who is not his subject. But the thing is, Finwë probably wasn't going to really punish him and that's why Manwë stepped in. Hell, we have no evidence of a trial going on for what Fëanor did. But the thing is, this isn't just a regular Fëanor and Fingolfin screaming match this was Fëanor actually threatening harm to Fingolfin in front of everyone. The guy literally sashayed into the room, wearing armour and drew a sword. This must have been the equivalent of a bank robber drawing out a loaded gun to the elves.

Anyways, ya know what good ol' Finwë did to protest against Manwë's interference and Fëanor getting exiled -

He incited the Fourth Shinobi War -

No, he just yeeted off with Fëanor. Look guys, I have neutral feelings towards Fingolfin I mean he is no victim (in general) because he has done some pretty presumptuous things (which is what makes him interesting, let's be honest), but I have never ever felt so bad for him before. Hell, this is an even worse 'fuck you' then making him cross the Helcaraxë because Fingolfin's main motivation in life thus far is probably to be equal to Fëanor in Finwë's eyes. I mean, he did leave Fingolfin regent (did he? Oh gosh, I honestly forgot) but still dealt an emotional blow anyways.

Right, so we don't get much of what Finwë did in Formenos but maybe this whole thing was just for him to get a holiday. And then Melkor comes and fucks shit up by killing Finwë. Now, I'm going to talk about Finwë's murder and why it is in my opinion the Inciting Incident™ of the Silm, the Chekhov's gun being fired so to speak, the equivalent of Ned Stark's execution in the Tolkienverse. Everything else, Melkor's lies, the creation of the Silmarils, the drama between the brothers, it was a build up to this moment. And everything after, the exile of the Noldor, the War of the Jewels, it was what happened because of Finwë's murder. Prior to this, there were already factions among the Noldor as previously discussed above but none of these factions actually openly made any moves against each other. Why? Because Finwë was still alive, because Finwë was essentially the lynchpin holding the Noldor together. Now, I'm pretty sure that Morgoth killed Finwë just to fuck Fëanor's shit up even more, but what he did was quite tactically brilliant. He has effectively wrought chaos among the Noldor in one single swoop.

And thus the Quenta Silmarillion happens.

In Mandos, he meets Míriel and tells her about his life. Because maybe it went something like this:

Finwë: so yeah, you know I was with our son all the way through and then I died. What have you been doing?

Míriel: oh, you know the usual things one does when one is condemned to Mandos for eternity.

Anyways, he gives up any opportunity for life for Míriel. Which is admittedly a nice thing to do since the reason Míriel is kinda stuck there is related to him, until you find out Míriel weaves the history of the House of Finwë instead of well, I don't know building the Mírindis ship? Yeah, she probably weaved Fingon getting his head smashed open by Gothmog and getting his corpse trampled. Oh and the 'If I Die, You Die' duel between Celegorm and Dior which probably wasn't as badass as Katniss' "If we burn, you burn with us" line from Mockingjay made it seem but more bloody and violent. Also Maedhros throwing himself off into a fiery chasm. Finrod getting mauled by a werewolf.

Good times, I'm sure.

But hey, at least Fëanor comes within a few seconds after stepping into Beleriand to keep him company.

So, I'm done with teasing my analysis of Finwë. Thank you for your time. Have a nice day.

Just keep procrastinating <3

[mangles-fruity-maze]

1. I DIDNT, I NOTICED MONTGOMERY HAD A DOOR AND FOR SOME REASON BRUSHED OT OFF AS DECORATION AJDNDKS

THAT'S A VERY GOOD THOUGHT THOUGH, THAT WOULD EXPLAIN HOW THEY GOT INTO THE PIPEY LOOKING PARTS

2. YEYEYE I NOTICED THE SCOOBA DOVER AND IT DOES LOOK VERY VERY SIMILAR TO THE VR PIRATE RIDE

MAYBE THAT AREA IS LIKE A LITTLE HOMAGE TO THE GAMES AND PREVIOUS CHATACTERS??

3. I DONT HAVE THE PICTURE OF KT BUT MR. SUNNY MAN DOING HIS LITTLE HOP ON THE BALLPIT??? 10/10 I LIVE HIM AND MOON MAN

4. I lowkey wonder if it's supposed to be some sort of foreshadowing, if they're supposed to be there for a little cover up maybe? Or if it's just me going overboard with things ^^

5. OOOO I DIDN'T THINK OF THAT WKDKOWKWNW THAT VERY WELL COULD BE WHAT'S HAPPENING

6. TO BE HONEST I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW I CAUGHT IT, I THINK I WAS LOOKING AT GLAM CHI'S EARRINGS BC THEY LOOKED DIFFERENT FROM PROMO PICKS AND I JUST SAW EARS AND WENT "OWO??? WHATS THIS??" AND WENT DOWN A CURIOSITY RABBIT HOLE, PUN NOT INTEDNED 🤭

7. I DIDNT KNOW THAT, I HAVENT BEEN VERY UP TO DATE WOTH THE AR GAME BC IT'S NOT COMPATIBLE WITH MY PHONE AND IT MAKES ME ANGERY >:(

BUT BUT!! THAT DRAWS ANOTHER PARALELL BETWEEN VANNY AND WILLIAM/GLITCHTRAP, THAT COULD BE REFERENCING HIS INFLUENCE IN HER

I say influence bc,, I'm not entirely on board with the whole possession thing they're hinting at,, i like the idea that she's being manipulated by her preexisting interest in maybe murder mysteries, strange disappearances, and maybe even the history of Freddy's itself and trying to unravel the story herself, and finds herself caught up in something she shouldn't be but it's too late to back out sort of thing,

Like maybe Vanny's always held an interest in rebellion and has an affinity for disobeying authority, but not quite to the extent of murder

She runs into glitch while beta testing and they form a bond under false pretenses on will/glitch's part, "I'll be your friend", father figure, etc. type scenario

And then he pulls the "you want to make me proud? here's how" card and it's literal kiddy strangling

And thIS COULD BE WHAT THE RELUCTANT PART OF RELUCTANT FOLLOWER REFERS TO

SHE DOESN'T WANT TO COMMIT KIDDY STRANGLE BUT BECAUSE SHE'LL BE "DISAPPOINTING" WILL/GLITCH, THE ONLY PERSON THAT'S PAYED ATTENTION TO HER IN A SEEMIBGLY CARING WAY

SHE FEELS LIKE SHE HAS TO

THEORIES ARE SO FUN!!!!!

OUGH THAT VANNY ONE...OW OOF OUCH MY ENDOSKELETON

I'm on board with u there I like to think they're real close friends but GOD

Seeing Afton threaten her makes me see RED. Hands off my friend, as another bird I know would say

I'm wondering if itll all end with him being taken out by Vanny....like it would be poetic. The creator getting taken out by his creation. That's one of my fave tropes...........

ALSO THE AR TRAILER IS ON YT IF YOUD LIKE TO TRY AND FIND GLITCHY

LIKE A FUN LIL SCAVENGER HUNT

Honestly I'd love if Glitchy was separate from William but I cant have everything I guess. He's my bunny friend in my canon and my heart 😔

[b00bconnoisseur]

60 questions for @not-my-brain

1. selfie.......Ugghhhh ok. Imma take one rn

Ok here u go (yes thats a bmth shirt)

2. what would you name your future kids?.....Ooo hmmm well when i was a kid i really liked the names disney, and mesiah. I didn't know at the time that mesiah was another name for god i think lol. I liked it cause of handlers mesiah. I still do. Ooo and maybe Tj too

3. do you miss anyone?......Yeah. My friends on Pinterest from a year ago. My friend lucas. Stan lee. Bob ross. My cousin who died from cancer some years ago. Snape. Sirius. Lupin. Tonks. Dobby. *continues to name every unfortunate death in hp*

4. what are you looking forward to?.......SE-YA next month!! Its the south eastern young adult festival at this college. You can have meet n greets with authors and alot of stuff its the besstttt

5. is there anyone who can always make you smile?......DEFINATELY. @dirtysocke @mysisterlooksforthisaccountsobye @cristal-kyd1280 @sammchenry my friend lucas and @septembersbloom. ^^

6. is it hard for you to get over someone?..... What like...romantically? Or like a death? If romantically uhhh idk it took over a couple weeks but im ok now. Ive never had another relationship so idk. If death oof yeah idk maybe. Ig it depends on how much i knew them idk. Like when my nanny (great grandma) died i was sad for days (is that alot?)

7. what was your life like last year?.....Sucky af. Still is. But the highlights of my life last year was getting and making friends on tumblr, going to the tøp concert and going to warped tour, volunteering at the library, going to seya and meeting some of my favorite authors, reading, changing and improving my art, listening to all the bands i listen to now, getting into more fandoms, going to a friends house for the first time

8. have you ever cried because you were so annoyed?.......Yes lol. Some years ago when i couldn't find smtn id be so annoyed and pissed id start crying. I dont now but still lol

9. who did you last see in person?.......Hm ig family doesn't count....? Wait do u mean a friend? If so uhh my friends rebekah, anika, and Judah at a TAB meeting at the library sometime last month.

10. are you good at hiding your feelings?......I think so? Like i mean I can hide whenever i get my....time of the month from my mom (talking abt stuff like that with her makes me uncomfortable) and i hid a breakup. And other p big stuff too. So imma say yeah

11. are you listening to music right now?........*pops on earbuds after reading this* yee im listening to bitch lasagna by pewdiepie xD (do i have the best spotify playlist or what?)

12. what is something you want right now?.......To hug @mysisterlooksforthisaccountsobye but SOMEONE has to live so far away

13. how do you feel right now?........Happy that my earbud still works cause they got washed in the wash yesterday....oops. Its not my fault. I told my dad to remind me to take it out of my jacket pocket before they threw it in but noooooo he forgot

14. when was the last time someone of the opposite sex hugged you?.......Uhhhhh fuck idk it was probably from my lil 4 yr old bro sometime last week. Other than him (hes my favorite sibling) i dont let them hug me too much

15. personality description.......Nerdy. Fangirl. "Emo". Tomboy. Hotsause obsessed. Book lover. Music lover. Black. Blue. Harry potter. Introvert. Fall. Sports. Values friendship. Loyal. Uhhhh i cant think of much lol

16. have you ever wanted to tell someone something but you didn’t?.......*sigh* yes. Yes yes yes. Theres some things abt me, or my life really, that i havent told anyone on here or my irl friends that i sooooo want to so bad but i haven't cause i feel like they'd feel bad and pity me and i don't want that

17. opinion on insecurities........I dont really understand this one. Everyones insecure abt something. Is this askin like if i think its ok or not? I say its ok. Im insecure about literally everything about me. My face. My personality. My socialness. My art. What i do. What i say. Basically my whole body. The things i feel good abt are my books, music taste, and my friends (ily fuckers)

18. do you miss how things were a year ago?.........Hmm this time around a year ago....idk its sorta the same but all the stuff i mentioned abt my year from last year didn't happen yet so nah tho my life sucks rn its better than this time last year

19. have you ever been to New York?........Nooo but i want too soo baddd i wanna visit @septembersbloom !! Im coming for ya soon gramps *does the eye watching thing* my dads been to nyc before tho cause he does construction and he had a concrete job to do there. It was a 23 hr drive for him

20. what is your favourite song at the moment?........Uhhh idk!!! So hard! Maybe.....the whole thats the spirit album by bmth ;)

21. age and birthday?.....15 yrs of age and September 27th 2003 (whats yours brainy? I'll put it on my calendar)

22. description of crush......Its weird idk im not sure if its a genuine crush or not but uh....They like hp :).Thats all u get

23. fear(s).......Losing my best friend @dirtysocke and my other friends. Death. Failure. Momo chasing after me then killing me slowly keeping my eyes open to look her dead in the eyes while i die

24. height......5'6 call me short and I'll fuck u up with THIS *pulls out trusty potato peeler named now steve* dont test me boi

25. role model......Hhhhhhhh so many! But uh gosh one of them is @superraedizzle (youtuberrrr) and vexx and bob ross and da vinci and aaaaaaa so many

26. idol(s)......First person that immediately comes to mind is @sammchenry cause he's super cool and he's really nice and his art's reallyyy good (if u havent seen it w-w-what are u even doin with your life?) And he has a great sense of humor and *continues to ramble about why samms the best*

27. things i hate.......Dabs. Transphobes. Homophobic ppl. Basically any hate on the lgbtq+ community. Bullies. The ship starker. Umbridge. Snape haters

28. i’ll love you if….....U you'll eat pizza, draw, and rp harry potter with mee

29. favourite film(s)......Fantastic beasts. Every hp film. Twilight. The maze runner 1-2. The hunger games. Spiderman homecoming. Kingsman: secret service. Into the spideyverse tho i havent seen it yet

30. favourite tv show(s)......Inkmasterrrrr. B99. The mick. The middle. Uhhh idk mostly ink master xD

31. 3 random facts........Ive never had shrimp. I had a beta fish for over a year once. Im eating pizza crust rn

32. are your friends mainly girls or guys?.......G i r l s. I have all girl friends irl and one boy. And on tumblr it seems like i just meet girls? Likei agree with @cristal-kyd1280 its like alot more gals then dudes here. But i do have some guy friends on here too. But mostly girls

33. something you want to learn.......TO DRAW ANATOMY DAMMIT

34. most embarrassing moment........Every moment of my lifes an embarrassing moment. Idk of i can pick a "most" embarrassing one. But one time i i sent my crush (now ex bf) a hey fuckface and like some hearts or whatever for an ask game that meant like "i have a crush on u" "youre adorable" etc and said Hewo but i did it all anonymously. But he confronted me askin if i sent it cause im the only person he knows that actually says hewo lol. Then later on i finally admitted i really liked him and well y'all know the story after i think. Unless you're new

35. favourite subject.......A R TTTT OFC

36. 3 dreams you want to fulfill?........meet my friends on tumblr. Get into mtsu (college i wanna go to) and study art. And go skydiving

37. favourite actor/actress........favorite actor uhhhhhh probably thomas brodie sangster or tom felton and my favorite actress? Hmmm idk maybe evanna lynch (luna lovegood)

38. favourite comedian(s).......probably kevin hart lol he's p funny

39. favourite sport(s)........basketballllllll and football

40. favourite memory........uhhhhh idk?? One oh my favorite memories was when we went to see tøp in concert

41. relationship status.....single as a pringle

42. favourite book(s)......harry potter and the order of the pheonix. Harry potter and the half blood prince. Simon vs the homo sapiens agenda. Divergent. Maze runner. Twilight. Fangirl. Fallen. Red queen

43. favourite song ever.......TOO HARD DONT MAKE ME CHOOSEEEEEE

44. age you get mistaken for.........16 and 17 sometimes lol

45. how you found out about your idol........i was watching someone on yt and superraedizzle always poped up in my feed and my mom turned on one of her vids cause she always saw her vids too now ive seen most of em i love her. Id heard of vexx but never watched him and i was watching a collab from anthony miller art and shrimpy and i checked out shrimpys channel and was lookin at comments and alot of ppl said his art is like vexxs so i checked out vexx. At first i was like eh ok. Now i cant click fast enough when he posts a vid. And i actually fpund out about bob ross from my grandpa on jan 20 2017 when trump was getting sworn in or whatever. We turned on pbs and my grampa told me to look and bob ross was on and i was IN. I loved it. I even started watching full episodes on YouTube of the joy of painting after that. Wonderful man. My first painting i ever did i think was when i followed one of his tutorials xD (i didnt know it was popular at the time)

46. what my last text message says......."ok your turn"

47. turn ons.....uhh nerds ig idk um book lovers, music lovers, art lovers, potterheads, idk and nice ppl

48. turn offs......jerks. Homophobia. Idk ig whatever i said in things i hate

49. where i want to be right now......uhhhh idk wait didn't i already answer this? Ok this ones different ig so uhh with my friend lucas

50. favourite picture of your idol.....oh shit...favorite? Idk xD i have a fave of vexx but not of rae or bob. But heres pics of them any way

51. starsign......a libraaaaa boiii

52. something i’m talented at......drawing and speed reading. Thats about it lol. Oh and procrastina

53. 5 things that make me happy.......ooooo art, my friends here on tumblr, books, harry potter, and music ^^

54. something thats worrying me at the moment.....if my friend thinks im being annoying

55. tumblr friends......hhhhh so manyyyyyy. @dirtysocke @mysisterlooksforthisaccountsobye @cristal-kyd1280 @chinesewaffles2 @kingantlion @queen-baelin @sammchenry @septembersbloom and more

56. favourite food(s)......green beans, pepperoni pizza, and vanilla madelines

57. favourite animal(s).......basically any reptile. Puppies. Cats. Any animal really but my #1 are snakes

58. description of my best friend.....well she's a tiny bean (5 feet) and she has dark hair, she wears glasses, she doesnt take shit, she's in love with Josh dun, she's awesome, funny, nice (YES youre nice jackie) and shes the best friend ive ever had. Oh. And she has a weird obsession with spaghetti

59. why i joined tumblr.......well i heard abt it on Pinterest over a year ago but didnt want it. Then @mrfastbass-deactivated20181231 on DeviantArt said he got tumblr so i made one then followed him and figured id just post art and that's it cause i thought tumblr was boring as hell when i first got it. Now im p much obsessed with it

60. ask me anything you want.......go ahead brainy shoot. Give me smtn good

[bhadpodcast]

I think you’re severely underestimating the demographic Arden pulls in. Her tweeting him out exposes him to a completely different market, just like when Ki Hong does it. // THIS so much Sticky. I've known Arden & her YT stuff way before DOB & Hoech. Hell, even before stanning Sterek. I'm an Asian living in Asia. Some of my friends didn't know TW until they saw clips of Arden as Kira. Then got pulled when they saw sterek stuff going around. So big thanks to her that we love hobrien now too.

YAY!  That’s a fantastic story!