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kuekyuuq · 3 years ago

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Gloria, Jet-lags and Imps [6x11]

Let’s jump right in:

Kinda love how Kara lamp-shaded addressed the fact she didn't tell the gang about her adventures in the PZ. She’s not wrong, tho.

...what do I want to say about Mxy using what's basically a well-known gay-anthem to tell his tale? I mean, it didn’t lead anywhere. The original song is about freeing oneself, liberation, stepping out of a (gone bad) relationship and moving on, stronger for it - empowerment. The only connection I could make, is that originally it was Nyxly’s aim to just do that (freeing herself and her kind from an oppressor), but in the way Mxy performed it, that part of the parallel was long over before he even reached the chorus. It’s also a popular Karaoke song, tho, so... he chose it because it’s catchy? I’ll try not to overthink it for now. At least, the Superfriend’s reactions were fun.

Nia exiting the elevator, "And what's this Old Stone?" I love it when ppl enter a room / situation and pick up on words that they couldn't have possibly heard. I think cinema sins ding such... Are we to assume, she dreamed Mxy's rendition of ‘I will survive’? Or is the elevator not sound-proof at all? (If it’s the latter, Nia later apparently telling Brainy “in private” between scenes / during the elevator ride about her Nyxly adventures, was a silly thing to do.)

So, "Jared" created the ring Old Stone to rule them all, it got shattered into the Paragons totems? Nyxly needs the totems and to get them she needs a crystal which also belonged to "Jared" - who happens to be Mxy's ancestor, which is why she needs Mxy / his blood, too.

I have one important and incredibly relevant question here, tho...

With the introduced imps and their names... Why’s dude named Jared of all things?!

Really, did I mishear that? If so, I’ll leave it as is and never edit, bc that would be hilarious in its own right 😋

...

Not sure what to make about Supergirl paraphrasing a Dirty Dancing quote. "Nobody puts Mxy into a power crystal on my watch." ...is he Baby now? (Seriously, though: Which of the writers thought that was a fitting quote to use in that particular context?)

...now, is the exposition section of the episode over yet?

Sensitive Brainy sensed something was up with Nia. He can relate... Nia doubting Kara would understand, too, is ridiculous. But I get it... insecurities and all. But, I mean, just 5 minutes later Kara announces she wants to save Nyxly despite her wrongdoings. And yet Nia still remains convinced, Kara wouldn’t forgive her own personal mini-me... After having witnessed Kara forgiving Lena for a whole season of the writers being stupid messing up to the nth degree. But I digress, Lena’s Lena.

...how old is Nia meant to be again? Just asking out of completely unrelated curiosity.

F*ck. They really went with NewFoundland...

Imma assume it was an executive choice after realizing they couldn’t find enough actors and actresses with a convincing Irish accent... maybe. Again, no offense to Newfoundland! Just... we got the insinuations of Ireland, not Newfoundland... And truthfully, when I think of magic, Ireland is an easy association. Whereas I only due to this whole debacle learned Newfoundland has Irish ancestry. So, okay, the show forced me to learn something new... I give ‘em that.

An easy journey, she said.

Lena's been off-screen for two whole episodes, Kara announcing at the beginning of ‘Dreamweaver’ [6x09] Lena being “back east” (at least insinuating Lena’s left the west-coast already), which span over at least one full day (feat. a scene at night), and ‘I still rise’ [6x10] at least another a whole day (the whole Nia’s mom back for a day deal). And, now, after at least 48 hours she barely just arrived.

Lemme check how long a regular plane would need to fly from California to NFL......... ... .. .. So... approx. 10 hours with at least one layover.

Yeah, using a private jet made it easier, but apparently also much, much slower...

Or, Lena randomly went some other places / did some sight-seeing in NFL before she decided to finally visit her mother’s hometown... [Either that or the timelines don’t match up and Lena’s scenes are flashbacks of sorts.]

Optimistic and relaxed Lena is a sight to behold. I rewound 3 times, just to enjoy it for as long as possible. We all knew it was going to be short-lived...

Let’s check off a few more items...

OMG, Kara hiding behind Alex at the mere sight of the PZ-projector broke my heart! 😢

"Elisabeth Walsh" is the new 'the one you shall not name'. ...poor Lena. 😭

Oh, so Mxy wants to be Patrick Swayze instead of Baby... gotcha.

...is this going anywhere?

KITTY!!! Okay, this must be the best opponent in the history of CWSG.

Despite the horrible CGI, SG using her heat-vision to project a laser-beam to distract the cat had me in (happy-) tears! 🤣

Gotta love the civilians of National City quickly returning to business as usual once the giant cat is gone. Even the police officers looked rather chill...

Nyxly did look fabulous this episode ^^

Andrea being Lena's rock is both great and annoying. I can't fault Andrea. It's just, that we still have to see an on-screen interaction between Lena and Kara and that bugs the heck out of me. I can’t help it. I’m sorry, Andrea.

Nia: "...is my fault." Kara: "Nu, is MY fault!" J'onn: "Stop fighting, kids!" Space-dad has spoken.

Mxy used an LuthorCorp copy machine... and of cos it's faulty. It's not an L-Corp product.

Kara forgiving Nia came as a surprise to her... Oooookay. I mean, the show has been writing Kara a bit inconsistently the past two seasons... so, yeah, maybe being unsure which of her traits apply this week was not such a far stretch...

Maybe it's the hair, but I wished, Florence was played by Alex Kingston.

So, not-Alex-Kingston shows Lena herself with a funny wig and tells her how her mother was still watching her...

If it wasn't for Katie's acting skills (I love her.) I would have already hit my head against the wall repeatedly. Something about these scenes had me constantly cringe and I made it through 5.5 seasons of this show already... Can’t quite put my finger on it, but it was highly distracting from the story that explained Lena’s mom was special even to another witch, where there was domestic abuse, and an accidental murder. Y’know, important stuff, deep-cutting stuff!

At least, poor widddle Lena got some closure there. Elisabeth was a good cookie. And filled with magic. And Lena’s gotta have that ‘spark’, too...

....so... Lena’s gonna stay in NFL for how much longer, to train becoming a witch? Please, just hand her a how-to manual and send her back home, to figure it out on her own, please... (Yes, that would be horrible decision-making, but I need her back with the team!)

On to the finish line:

So... Mxy IS Nyxly's brother? Wait, that doesn’t sound right... then Nyxly would have the same blood... Did I miss something? Can someone explain, please? Or is he her ex, and that’s where his rendition of “I will survive” makes sense?

Hnn... I can't help, but think Kara's speech for Nyxly was 85% based on her experiences with Lena in s05.

Awww... he said "stronger together"... Mxy... I hope, you'll be okay!

Lena believes in magic now. And I absolutely love how Lena wants to science magic XD

...but apparently magic isn’t science that hasn’t been explained yet, but parallel... powers? concepts? ether strings?

Nyxly has a loyal henchman now. Which was a bit heavy-handed. Took way too much of screen-time, so it better leads to something interesting.

And Kara is on a warpath now. Wooooot! Girl’s got enough.

...what else?

Did I miss a third Patrick Swayze hint / quote / mention? I learned, these things come in threes... Y’know, basic writing rules...

I guess, for once the episode title was meant to be taken literally, Mxy popping up between characters, to try and help. (I need in-show footage, of Mxy sneaking up on ppl, without his powers, on all fours / crouched, just to get the desired effect.) I mean, I’ve never really watched Malcom, but wasn’t he like what Mxy usually is? A bit of a trouble-maker, prankster, chaos-ensuing wherever he goes? ...well, in that case, the episode title didn’t hold up, as Mxy’s scenes were not fun or really goofy. Yes, there was some superficial humor, but just to serve Mxy dealing with not being able to use his powers, which in turn was only barely scratched at (although it turned out to be his final character development crisis, appreciating not having powers and - in turn - facing consequences for once). Again, a whole lot going on in the episode, so a lot of that may have ended up on the cutting-room floor.

...where’s Kelly? Secretly adopting a kid, maybe?

...Kara’s still a reporter, right? I mean, whenever it serves the immediate plot, yes? ...Not even a throw-away line, that she has to pop up at CatCo for appearances sake? Since Andrea is already upset with her AND looking into her friends’ identities? At least, Kara should take a peek to make sure Andrea hasn’t uncovered anything yet... No?

Well, that’s all I’ve got for now. Kue out.

#Supergirl #supercorp #Mxy in the middle #6x11 #mxy #nyxly #lena luthor #magic #lena's mom #fiction dissected #fandom #episode #Nia nal #dreamer #brainy #brainia

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im-not-a-joke · 4 years ago

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The Soulmate AU Thing

Whoop I wrote it

Read it on ao3

based off this post (and the comments on it)

warnings: none, really, there’s a little cursing and like a tad bit of internalized homophobia but it’s very minor

Relationships: Byler, Stoncy (but like, once, and its vague), Dustin/Lucas/Max/El

Wordcount: 1,753

you can also read it below the cut

The realization hit Mike like a truck.

Will and I are soulmates.

He had been minding his own business, just going about his regular day when he remembered the lab and Will’s episodes and seeing his best friend lose control of his own body. He remembered the Mark that was left exposed after the doctors had taken Will’s shirt. The same Mark that matched Mike’s own. He hadn’t thought about it at the time, being more concerned about his best friend being possessed. And he had forgotten in the aftermath, too busy focusing on said aftermath and the quickly approaching holidays.

Well, forgotten may have been a strong word. He didn’t think it ever left his mind, but he had pushed it to the side temporarily to deal with bigger problems. He had quoted it during his Big Emotional Speech, but that was beside the point.

Now it was January, and Mike was back in school and bored out of his mind, so he let it wander. And it wandered to the little black you said yes imprinted on Will’s side. Luckily for Mike, Will had been possessed during his speech and most likely didn’t remember him saying it. (But the look in his eyes when Mike said it told him otherwise. Oh God, what if he knows that Mike knows what if he hates him oh no oh no no nonononono-)

(Deep breaths, Wheeler)

Mike had never really considered his soulmate. Sure, he occasionally wondered what they would be like and when they would meet, but who didn’t? And yes, he had found himself thinking about his small friend a little bit too much, but that was just because they’ve been friends since they were five, right? Apparently not, he grimaced to himself, how are you going to deal with this one?

But that would have to come later, for now he had to make it through the day.

It wasn’t until he got home that the other realization hit him.

I’m gay.

That one was less surprising. He had never really been interested in girls, and liked El significantly less now that she looked more feminine. He had realized after the Snowball that he felt like El was more of a sister to him, and they had come to a mutual agreement to be friends and nothing more.

He supposed that the gay thing made sense, but he worried about what everyone else would think if and when they found out. Nancy would probably be okay, she had never really agreed with their father on anything, and Mike doubted she would start agreeing when it came to gay people. His dad might be more of a problem, but he didn’t have to know. Not yet, at least. His mom was a wild card. He hoped she wouldn’t be disgusted by him, but there was really no telling. His friends would understand, he hoped. Lucas would. He had once confided in Mike that he had three Marks, so he would definitely not be grossed out by Mike being gay.

But what about Will? His reaction would probably be the most important. He was Mike’s soulmate after all. He wouldn’t blame him if he didn’t want to be Mike’s friend anymore, especially with having dealt with Lonnie. But, soulmates were supposed to work out, right? Maybe not, he was 90% sure his parents weren’t soulmates anyway, so maybe his Mark was broken. Oh God, what if his was broken?

It couldn’t be. That’s not how things worked. He was just tired and overthinking, a good nap would help. But, he had homework to do first. Ugh, homework.

~~~~~~~

Do you remember the first day that we met?

“Nancy, can I talk to you?”

“What did you do?”

“Nothing, it’s just,” come on, Mike! You can do it! “I like boys and not girls,”

Nancy’s face softened, she pulled the collar of her turtleneck down to reveal two soulmarks, one, a camera, the other, the nailbat.

“Oh.”

It was.. It was the first day of kindergarten. I knew nobody.

“Lucas, we’ll always be friends, right?” They were sat on Lucas’ bed, and Mike was reminded of Lucas’ angry, confused confession just a year prior.

“Yeah, unless you like, murder my soulmates,” Lucas had made a lot of progress, part of which was finding out that Max was one of his soulmates, and that, he didn’t hear it from Lucas but, she also had three soulmarks. Mike was 90% sure it would turn out to be Lucas, Dustin, Max, and El but never mentioned it.

“I’m gay. Will is my soulmate.” Lucas looked shocked for all of three seconds before he smiled at Mike.

“I’m glad you could tell me, dude.” He didn’t ask how Mike knew the Will thing, he just patted him on the back and went back to talking about the last family movie night he had to suffer through.

I had no friends. I just felt so alone and, and so scared

“Guys, I have to tell you something important.”

“What’s up, Mike?” He had four pairs of eyes on him. Two curious, one annoyed, and one knowing.

It was one of the few days Hopper would let all of them visit El in the cabin, but Will had a doctor’s appointment. Mike missed him, the group wasn't the same without Will there to offer his typically cheerful input. Mike also felt like he was third-wheeling the four other kids.

“I’m gay, I like boys.” El’s expression didn’t change, Dustin looked somehow, relieved? Max softened, but tried to keep up the annoyed flair. Lucas wore a proud smile.

“Doesn’t everyone like boys?”

“No, El, usually boys only like girls and girls only like boys.” That made it sound bad, fuck, backtrack backtrack backtrack-

“It’s not a bad thing, you can like whoever you want.” Thank the lord for Lucas Sinclair, saving Mike’s ass since first grade.

“Oh, well, in that case, I like boys and girls,” El looked pleased now, and the other three went red. Definitely soulmates.

But I saw you on the swings, you were alone too. You were just swinging by yourself.

“Steve, I need your advice”

“I swear to all things good and holy Dustin, if this is about any of your little- oh hey, Mike. What’s up?”

“You like boys and girls, right?” Mike barely knew where he wanted this conversation to go. But he knew Steve was definitely the one to go to.

“Yeah, why?”

“How did you tell people that you weren’t sure about their reactions?”

“Hey uh, are you, are you bi?” Mike had never seen Steve this reserved before, it felt like he was trying to approach a scared animal, well, he may as well have been a scared animal at this point.

“No, no, I’m gay, i just, I want to tell my mom and Will but I’m worried about how they’ll react.” Mike had to cut himself off. He could feel himself start rambling and he didn’t want to say too much.

“Oh, ok then, uh,” he paused to think, “I think Will will be fine. As for your mom, probably sit her down and just rip the bandaid.” If he thought Will was going to be fine, he probably would be, Mike trusted Steve, he usually knew what he was doing.

“Thanks, Steve.”

“No problem, big guy,” and Steve wrapped him in a hug.

And I just walked up to you, and, I asked. I asked if you wanted to be my friend

“Mom, I have to talk to you.” There was a rare moment of peace in the Wheeler house, and he was going to take advantage of it. He sat himself next to her on the couch, avoiding eye contact.

“Mike, sweetie, what’s wrong?” The concern in her voice gave him hope. Things would be okay, she would love him no matter what.

“I know who my soulmate is, and uh, he’s a boy. And I really like him.” Mike had retracted in on himself, but his mom just grabbed his wrists gently, pulling his hands toward her.

“Mike,” he finally made eye contact to see her smiling down at him, eyes brimming with tears, “thank you for telling me, I am so proud of you, and I love you.”

He collapsed into her for a hug and cried. It had gone well.

And you said yes. You said yes.

“I’m gay.” He was finally telling Will, the most important person in his life, after a good three months since his realization.

“Me too.”

And that was that.

And it was the best thing I’ve ever done.

~~~~~~~~

It had been four months since Mike came out to Will (and vice versa), and Mike could barely hold it in anymore. Lucas had been bugging him about telling Will the thing since he had come out. He wanted to do it, but could never find the time without making things awkward.

The six of them were walking up the hill to set up Cerebro, WIll and Mike trailing behind slightly. Dustin was rambling on, holding hands with El (the four of them had come to their realization and had been inseparable ever since). Mike was going to do it now. He had to.

“Hey, uh, Will?”

“Hmm?”

“Can we, uh, talk?” He grabbed his wrist, and turned to face him, they had both stopped walking at this point. Will looked confused, usually Mike was very forward.

“What do you need?” Mike’s brain was firing at a million miles an hour, he had no idea what he was going to do.

“I have something to show you.” He was doing it. It was happening, this was real. He lifted his shirt a bit to reveal the small lettering on his side in the same place as Will’s. Will’s eyebrows shot up into his hair.

“I saw yours back in November when we had to take you to the lab. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you before but I didn’t want you to be mad and I didn’t know how to say it and I really really li-”

“Mike. It’s okay. We got there in the end.” Will was smiling wider than he had in over two years now, and Mike felt complete. Will grabbed his hand.

“Y’know, back in the shed in November, I heard you say it. I brushed it of but it took me by surprise, I’ve wondered ever since.”

“So that’s why you looked at me like that.”

#whooooo i did it #yay ok #time to tag this #byler #byeler #carson rambles #if yall enjoy this i can do more #i have more ideas

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vrainsrewatch · 5 years ago

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episode 19 thoughts

this is... the most screenshot heavy post i’ve made so far, lmao, so please bear with me. as i’ve said, this is one of my favorite duels, and there’s a lot that gets covered here. like, seriously, i haven’t written this post out yet but i can guarantee this will be my longest so far lmao.

the beginning of the episode starts off fairly standard, and mostly dueling:

i really do love the pacing of this duel. i was glued to the edge of my seat while watching these episodes. i remember it so clearly, too, because i’d been binge watching from episode 16 that day, and got to like, 24 by the time i stopped, lmao.

ai does a lot of cute/funny stuff this episode, to help break up some of the more dark tones of the rest of it, like this:

it really makes me miss hi in this form :( i really like his soltis form, don’t get me wrong, but i miss him on yusaku’s wrist lol. i would say when things were less angsty, but, well. lmao.

we very quickly get akira’s rad boss monster summoned out:

and seriously, i just love the animation for it. it’s so sick. the door, the fire, how it looms behind him at first.... aaaaaa. so cool.

and of course the classic:

the worst part about this line is it’s said so often (esp in arc v LOL) that i actually. have slipped up and said it in normal, day to day conversation before. my boyfriend looked at me for like a minute and gave me the deepest sigh i’ve ever heard the first time i did that pff.

also:

i couldn’t not screencap this, given what my blog is for LOL

every time something reminds me of that painful final duel, i have to screencap it and make you guys sad with me. if i have to be sad seeing all this stuff, knowing where their relationship goes and how the series ends, so do you.

also, though, i forgot how often this was brought up before the bohman duel lmao. it makes that theory look a lot more credible, so it’s cool that it had all these little hints towards it, even if it ultimately wasn’t true.

seriously, my heart. i don’t think i need to talk much about this scene to make y’all sad, but really. they went from this to i loved you. ugh, god, i’m so sad thinking about it lmao.

there is so much to talk about between akira and playmaker and even blue angel in this episode, so i guess we’ll start here.

it is hard to decide that you want to take control of your trauma and do something about it. it is not easy. to see yusaku fight for that right so thoroughly is incredible, and really, really validating.

more sadness! seriously, this is too much. this deck was created specifically for him by ai. i don’t like this anymore lmao

but even besides that, often times the protag’s decks mean a lot to them, obviously, but i love that it wasn’t built strictly by yusaku. his cards were literally made by ai, and i think that’s such a cool twist.

but then, akira’s speech:

i talked last time about akira wanting to handle things himself, and i briefly touched on him thinking he knows best...

but i really admire how calm yusaku stays at that tbh. he gets angry, reasonably so imo, but he takes this so well. i know i was a much more volatile kid then he is, so respect lol

i’ve spoken at length already about akira, but i also want to talk again about how oblivious he is. he is so blinded by his own thoughts and feelings on the situation that he doesn’t stop to think about how yusaku might be feeling -- and worse, honestly, how his sister might be feeling.

it was why he was so visibly shocked when emma mentioned a few episodes ago that aoi wasn’t just a little kid anymore. it’s so clear that he still, at the moment, sees her as the six year old girl he swore to protect, and not the sixteen year old person she’s become. he doesn’t think about how she might be feeling towards his actions, or why she does what she does.

this is highlighted as early as episode 6 iirc, when he asks her why aren’t you happy? as much as i, personally, dislike his character, i can’t deny it’s very realistic and well written.

speaking of aoi:

i love how she’s written in this episode, too. but her entrance here is great, and i love how she stands up to him about this. it’s minor, but it’s still a good step. when she’s blue angel -- or blue girl, or blue maiden -- she feels comfortable doing that. at least a little, and it obviously grows throughout the series. i hope that transfers over to the real world for her, too.

and then, we finally get the full story:

i remember flinching when he started talking about it, remembering the shots of yusaku getting electrocuted from his duel with revolver.

i really love this. i said it last episode, but vrains handles yusaku’s trauma so realistically and it’s amazing.

i remember originally staring open mouthed at my tv screen while this part played. we got a bit of it from the other episode, but the full context truly shocked me. where’s that post that says “who thought this was an acceptable backstory to give to a card game protag” bc honestly??? YEAH

it’s still hard to watch. it’s still hard to see play out, even if it’s only fiction. even though i’ve seen these clips so many times, and written about them in detail a few times too. doesn’t matter lol. watching it in context actually still made my stomach drop.

which leads me to talk about reactions to this, actually:

the two that vrains focuses heavily on are blue angel’s and kusanagi’s, and they contrast really well here imo.

blue angel’s is a normal reaction. it’s horrified, both at the thought of it happening and at the fact that someone would actually do that to another person -- a six year old child, no less.

kusanagi’s is strained. he is angry hearing about this, thinking about jin. we’ve been told, and have seen in the last few episodes, how much the lost incident impacted kusanagi and his brother, but i really love that the show tells us that here, too, and shows the difference between hearing about a tragedy and being involved in some manner.

i did not expect it at all when first watching vrains, and honestly, it still impresses me how gracefully they handled it coming off of arc v (cough, shun i love you but really cough cough). no hate on arc v at all, it’s my third favorite ygo very close behind gx, but the difference between the two on how they handle these things is staggering.

this whole section makes me thing that ryoken talked to yusaku fairly often, after the first time. which is something i don’t see brought up often? but that’s so important imo. it meant that yusaku had someone encouraging him not just once or twice, but on the regular, but also it meant that ryoken was constantly risking himself to comfort that child.

we don’t see too much of ryoken when he’s a kid, but we do see him scared and crying over the lost incident. the fact that he was able to talk calmly to this child so many times is really amazing. it also makes more sense as to why ryoken feels so guilty over calling the police -- he probably felt that maybe if he had just kept up his encouragement, the kids would’ve all gotten out okay and his father wouldn’t be in a coma.

this was so powerful. it’s obvious, and i think anyone with half a brain would understand that the LI isn’t something that a kid would recover from easily, but i love this anyways.

he wasn’t saved. and even if he was in body, it’s still something he and all the other victims will live with for the rest of their lives.

this also is something i don’t feel like people bring up enough, but does this mean that yusaku went around asking the kids at the hospital when he was rescued? it’s not hard to believe they were all put together, at least for a short amount of time, but it’s still something i feel like people overlook.

i also love this, because it’s nice foreshadowing to how revolver feels. he’s not captured, not like yusaku and the lost kids were, but he is a prisoner. and just like ryoken saved yusaku, way back then, he is determined to repay the favor.

not just because of that, either. because that voice meant so much to him. because that voiced saved him. because that voice understood him, and was there for him in his hardest moments. god i love them.

i love this shot. it’s so dramatic, how the match the drum beats with flashes of everyone’s reactions.

but it drives home his point, and while i know most of akira’s development came through emma and aoi, i’m sure this helped, too.

i’ve sung vrains praises this entire post, but i’ll do it again -- this is incredible. this is so realistic. it’s so well portrayed. and it’s really honest to god incredible that we got a protag in ygo who was shown going to therapy.

ygo has always dealt with some pretty dark subject matter, and it’s never really been shy about showing it on screen. i’m not saying that at all. arc v obviously dealt with some pretty heavy stuff, and while i haven’t seen zexal (keep shaming me please) i know it does, too. 5ds obviously has the dark signer arc, and the later arcs concerning bruno and also yusei’s father, and gx has... well, it’s entire third and fourth season.

but we see everyone healing via card games. we see those shows talk about these things, but kind of at the same time, skirt around the subject matter; or if they do go deep into it, they pull out (ie 5ds) or the characters don’t get resolved properly (ie arc v).

idk where i was going with this but i just really love that this happened, this was shown on screen, and they stuck to yusaku’s character. they didn’t just... up and make his trauma and his world view disappear at the end. he has a bittersweet ending, but it suited him and his development. a lot of people were mad about it, and i get it -- i wanted him to be happy, too.

but that’s not always the case, and it’s really important to me that vrains doesn’t pretend it is.

anyways, though, i’m almost done with this episode i promise lmao. before the episode ends, we get this:

and i think it’s honestly kind of cruel that akira says this, after everything, and still maintains his point of handling it himself. he has heard, first hand now, how horrible the incident has scarred yusaku for life. and yet, he still is stubborn in refusing to relate or at the very least empathize.

what i mean by that, since we obviously see him attempt to last episode, is he refuses to look at it from someone’s else’s perspective or in a way that might make him uncomfortable. the way my boyfriend describes these kinds of people is that they “haven’t had their bubble popped”.

everyone has a bubble when they’re born, and that bubble shields you from realizing that the world is a cruel and hard place. even if you go through hardships, sometimes your bubble stays put, and you think that is the worst of what can happen.

i’m explaining this very poorly, because i’m running on not much sleep and i’ve been typing about this episode for like, far, far too long, but essentially, he refuses to step out of his comfort zone and recognize, in playmaker’s case, that he doesn’t have a right to interfere and that playmaker’s desire to handle it himself is justified and helpful for his healing. and in aoi’s case, that just because he does a lot of good for her doesn’t automatically mean ignoring her for work and keeping her locked in their house is an okay trade off. and also that she’s not a child anymore -- she’s nearly an adult and she deserves to be treated as one.

those thoughts seem to unsettle him. you can kind of see it in how detached he is after hearing all that come from playmaker. blue angel is visibly shaken up by what he’s said. akira doesn’t even flinch, because he’s not really listening right now.

i’m glad he learns to, or at least learns how to start, later on.

anyways, i think that’s enough for this post lmao. this took forever to type up, so let’s hope i actually have time to cover up to 21 here today LOL. if you read all that, thank you for your time on my kind of dumb vrains thoughts :’)

#vrains #episode 19

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inksparkcrafts · 6 years ago

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Jewelry Making: Because this stuff may not be as intuitive as I thought.

So first and foremost this post is in response to/inspired by @lunar-rose-witch who originally tagged a request for help as "#jewelry making" and fully caught my attention, inspiring me to not only give her some quick pointers but start writing a full-on-post in my craft blog for the first time in years. (Also I looked back and half my response dissipated into the ether, sorry!

Also I’m going to buck craft blog trend a bit: The personal backstory will bring up the rear of this piece, so you can get to the juicy info right away. Hit the read more for the full speech.

MASSIVE EDIT: Not all the techniques in this post work for all styles of jewelry. This is for the typical, “like what you can buy in the store” type techniques, but there are specific techniques and styles that don’t quite match the most specific, technique- and supply-based info here just due to the nature of their creation. (for good examples, look at macrame hemp jewelry or kandi, a style making primary use of elastic, monofilament, and plastic beads) A lot of the more basic info works, though, I just wanted to cover that.

So here’s how I’m going to structure it: Quick explanation, and then a “high-end” and “budget” approach if it applies, and then my recommendation which usually swings somewhere between the two. Rinse and repeat until we get to the bottom of my list of subjects. No time for questions, the area I’m writing in has spotty wifi!

Tips

(note: no high-end or budget options, this applies to everyone)

Full disclosure, this is upfront because if you’re confident in your jewelry-making you don’t need the other stuff.

The most important tip is to always have fun. You want to make something bright and colorful? Go ahead. You want to please a divine figure in your life with what you wear? That’s fine! You want to make an avant garde wearable piece? I fully support you! You want to make a way to carry something with you? I have a giant box-shaped “locket” I can’t be against that! You want to make it look like a cooking pan melted weird and wear it on your head? Please post pics! You want to incorporate the usb drive you use for school into your earrings? Let’s see someone knick it off you now! You want to make a hangman’s noose into a necklace? Stitch like 20 stitches of upholstery thread through that knot so you don’t actually strangle yourself. Once you’ve done that you do you boo. I digress, don’t hurt yourself, but do have fun with it. Most of the following information is for standard cold-connection (read: no sautering) jewelry making, which is a good foundation for your line of 30 ways to creatively use rope as a necklace.

My next tip connects nicely to the first: check your fit and watch your weight. Not your bodyweight, the weight of your piece. A few ounces on the body can be comforting, but a half pound on your wrist or neck is asking for pain later. Likewise with the fit, a snug princess fit may be nice, but a tight collar not so much. As you’re working, regularly check the fit, especially if 1) it’s a new design, and 2) you’re planning on wearing it. Especially especially if you’re wearing it to an event where you can’t easily ditch it. Put on your piece, move around a little to make sure it doesn’t fall off. That kind of thing. Never just do it and call it done.

For laying it out on your workspace, you may want to invest in a beading mat. This keeps things, especially small beads, from rolling around on you. A beading board or a necklace board is useful if you plan on making a lot of pieces with distinct focal points. For both home and travel, they sell little spiral clips called bead bugs or bead buddies that grip tightly to where you’re stringing and worth their weight in gold. (binder clips work ok for this, but tend to slip off more easily) If you do a lot of making on the go, a clamshell project carrier is kind of pricey but may be worth your while.

Things to learn asap: how to make a crimp, how to make an eye, fisherman’s knot. There are other things but these bits of knowledge are absolute workhorses.

For those of you with metal allergies, work around it where you can, get something that won’t hurt your skin where you can’t. I often use cord or beads because a lot of market chains irritate my skin, and I always get hypoallergenic earring findings. It’s just not worth the hassle not to.

Get a reference for default sizes. Just, even as a hobbyist. Trust me on this. It’s a good thing to know. Default sizes for necklaces, bracelets, rings, beads. Don’t even need to spend a lot of money, just print them from online. You’ll thank me later.

Info and Techniques

There are varying ways to learn more about jewelry making.

High-end: Buy every book on jewelry making you can. Take all the classes you can. Just absorb all the info you can!

Budget: Get a notebook and a pen and start taking some serious notes. You don’t need to draw well for this, but you see a technique you like? Jot it down. See a piece you think is cool? Make a quick sketch, try and figure out how to reverse engineer it. At the craft store and the employee tells you something you didn’t know? Into the book. Scour libraries, check the internet, fill that sucker with every little jewelry making thing that catches your interest.

My Recommendation: The budget solution, for sure, but I am also an avid Pinterest user. (I know Pinterest is free, but not everyone has regular access to a computer or the internet) I see a technique, I save it. The one risk is that you may spend more time pinning that you do making; thanks to the new feature of categories for each board, I’ve very recently started a private “projects” board, where I put all the stuff for a project I want to do. That way I don’t get distracted.

Sourcing Supplies

How and where you get your supplies is important for figuring out your project.

High-end: You can go to any jewelry making store and get the high-quality beads and findings, the strongest tools, and the stuff for the nicest setup. All your stuff, design aside, will be sturdy and high-quality. Go to the craft store for anything else.

Budget: Be an avid thrift-shopper. Buy old, cheap necklaces and harvest the beads. If the wire in the necklaces is still in decent condition, save that too. Same goes for particularly nice clasps. Use upholstery thread or, in a pinch, unscented dental floss. Some people use snaps for clasps, as they’re easier to maneuver. Wait for sales in your local craft store, and scrounge their clearance bins for some real gems. Make beads and focal-pieces from stuff around the house. Get creative!

My Recommendation: I swing wildly between the two. I have a metal allergy, meaning if I want to be able to wear my stuff I have to shell out for the hypo-allergenic stuff or find an alternative that won’t irritate my skin. But some of my best beads have come from $1 thrift store necklaces, and the better I get the more I can make on my own. I’ve made my own clasps before from shrink plastic, which- fun fact- can be scrounged from some plastic food containers, you don’t need to buy shrinky dinks! So, put down money on the part that’s important in your project, but you don’t need to spend a lot to make good jewelry when a bit of time investment will do the job.

Your Tools

Your toolset and supply choices will vary, from what you have to how you store it.

High-end: Get all the things! All the different types of pliers, beading needles, toolboxes, bead boards. If they sell it you can use it for something. The cool devices that make certain tasks easier to do, too.

Budget: One multi-tool. You can do everything from there.

My recommendation: Like with your supplies, put money where it matters. The biggest factor is how quickly a tool will wear down. Namely, don’t get too attached to your wire cutter because it’s going to go the way of all things way before anything else in your tool kit does. Here’s my basic list:

round nosed pliers

flat nosed pliers

wire cutters

bead bugs/bead buddies

a good pair of sharp scissors

large-eye beading needles (aint nobody got time for that tiny hole nonsense)

crimping tool

That last one is interesting and I want to point it out: a crimping tool is a little pair of pliers that help you fold crimps. (see Bracelets and Necklaces) It is the one tool that can’t really be used for anything else, except maybe helping with crimp covers. (there is also a pair of crimp cover pliers and... no. just no. save your money) This is the most specific tool I ever recommend because it is has one job and it is very good at it. If you’re planning on using a lot of beading wire, get a crimp tool. It’ll save you a headache later.

(finally, we get project specific)

Bracelets and Necklaces

For these kinds of projects, I always recommend beading wire. It’s sturdy and easy to use if you know how, and often lasts longer than string which can be affected by moisture, heat, and general wear and tear. The more strands it has, the more flexible it is. (i.e. 7 strands vs. 49 strands) Do not knot this material, always use a crimp bead or a crimp tube. Knots will come loose. I’m always surprised how many people don’t make this connection, as it is by name a wire, but now you know. You can use a pair of flat pliers to “seal” them, but I often recommend a crimping tool. (As I wrote above, a crimping tool is the most specific tool I will suggest you buy. It can do one thing but it’s damn good at that one thing.)

For those that want a more natural, or flexible, piece, thin cord or beading thread is where you’re going. Wildfire is pricey but lasts a long time and is a good beading thread. For beads with bigger holes, go for cotton, leather, or hemp beading cord.

An important note on this! Thin cord or silk cord is often used for stringing pearls. Should you find pearls interesting, a good technique to learn would be to knot inbetween each bead; this keeps the beads from grinding up against each other and getting damaged, and is also a good way to avoid losing your entire strand if the cord snaps at some point. My technique is this: string pearl. Start to tie a knot. Put a sewing pin or a needle into the knot and gently pull until the knot, needle and all, is pushing against your bead. Then tighten. Repeat.

Elastic and stretchy cord is ok? Better for lighter pieces. Personally I don’t like it because over time it will soak up the sweat and oils of your skin, which will promptly degrade it to the point it snaps. Better for young kids or people with less dexterity, since it’s easy to put on and take off. I used to use one, but then I’d be working and my necklace would get caught on something somehow for a second and then hit me in the neck or wrist. No thank you.

Monofilament is like fishing line and kind of tricky. It’s strong and can be used in the place of beading wire, but only up to a point. It has a bit of give which gives it weakness, but not enough to be stretchy. Still, it has good strength, is almost invisible, and if you’re thrifty can be bought as sturdy fishing line and save you some coin. If you ever see a piece with “floating” beads, they used a monofilament thread.

Chains are almost a topic all to themselves, since there’s such a wide variety. Your tools will open links on chains with defined links, but look carefully at chains like ball chains and snake chains, which need to be treated specially as they have no distinct links. Also, if you have a metal allergy, this is where money will go, that or only ever wear your piece with collared shirts or over sleeve cuffs.

Your clasps will vary, but I recommend against anything that will fall loose and cause your piece to fall off. I love toggles but if the piece is too light you’re asking to lose it. Lobster clasps are a solid go-to option, albeit a bit tricky on bracelets, where you may find a hook more your style. Those ridiculous barrel clasps are best on necklaces, where you can use both hands to full affect. The magnets are strong and very good, but I don’t use them much because I’m always worried I’ll Stick To Something Right When I Don’t Need To. Good if you or the recipient has dexterity issues since it’ll just snap together.

Be careful with your beads, especially on bracelets. Since they’re laying on a curved surface, how the beads will go together will vary. This is where “try on your piece” comes into play. And a word of advice, try not to go too wild in variation or with something too sharp, especially for your wrist. That hurts. Also, avoid going too heavy.

Rings and Earrings

This is where hypoallergenic stuff comes into play the most. (side note, if you don’t have any metal allergy, you can skip this paragraph you fortunate soul) You can weave or tie a ring, but you can’t do that with an earring finding. The big bucks will be put down on those, since depending on your sensitivity you may have to put down bigger bucks for 14k gold and sterling silver findings. The internet is a good resource for this, but always check reviews. Be careful in craft stores, since sometimes the packaging will be confusingly worded. You can temporarily get around this by putting the hook or post in antibiotic ointment right before putting it in your ear, but this is iffy for long-term use.

Make sure your posts have backings that stay on, usually those little curly things or the bullets. For fishhooks there’s a product called a hook keeper or something similar. You may have seen it on the back of earrings you just bought; they’re a little piece of rubber that keeps the hook from working its way out of your ear, good for active people. You can buy these suckers in bulk.

Before I move on to rings, earrings, are where the weight thing is the biggest issue; when I just got my ears pierced, I made a ton of earrings out of clay in preparation for being able to switch them out. One of them was a pair of massive and thick earrings based off a tv show, I think. This lead to Immediate Regret, as the earrings stretched my earlobes to the point of me supporting them with my hands while walking through Walmart to avoid the pain, before realizing how stupid that was and taking them out. Watch the weight, the lighter the better as most ear piercings go through the fleshiest, least structured part of your body. Just, in general, avoid too much weight on anything that uses a piercing. Unless that’s the point. (I see you guys with gauges)

As for rings! I honestly don’t make a lot since I don’t wear a lot, but here’s what I know: your base should either have some give (read: stretchy) or be adjustable. if it’s a fixed size, test the fit constantly while making it. You don’t want to spend that time and energy on something that either rattles around on your thumb or can barely fit your pinky. Always watch the fit on any of these; your fingers will turn white first if something is too tight, then slowly turn red. That is a bad fit, don’t wear it like that. Switch it to a different finger if you have to. You’ll see visible space if it’s too loose. Don’t wear it like that either, you’ll lose it or worse, get caught on something. I actually have an aunt that lost a whole finger that way. Don’t do that. (Maybe that’s the reason I don’t like rings?)

If your ring has to have a large profile (read: a lot of stuff on top) make sure it’s secure. Try to avoid little fiddly bits where you can, go for something like a mountain: large base. When possible, go for something like a coin; low profile, goes along the fingers, but with lots of room to create. Try not to have too many things going off it, either; anything that dangles off the ring really shouldn’t go farther than the side of your hand. This is as much safety as anything; you don’t want your ring to get caught on something and get ripped off your hand, or worse. Also, try to avoid anything too... bumpy? Like with too much variation on the side, the kind that will dig into the sides of your fingers. Not a fun time.

My Backstory

(aka the personal story I moved to the end so you could get to the juicy info)

I got into jewelry making literally by being asked to be the jewelry instructor. You’d think it was the other way around; nope! We needed a jewelry instructor and I was already making baby steps by gluing buttons to earring posts, so I agreed to learn to basics and help education out in the craft store where I worked. That lead to a fascination; there’s seriously so much stuff you can do if you just know where to look! I’ve been making my own jewelry ever since.

As such, I’ve put a lot of time into learning new techniques, which is where I am now. As anyone who’s decently good at something will tell you, the more you know the more you realize you don’t know. I am by no means an expert. The idea is to pass this info on to anyone who somehow knows less than me.

Thanks for reading! If there’s anything I missed or you want to know more about feel free to hit me up with an ask.

#jewelry making #jewelry design

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animeangelriku · 6 years ago

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Puzzleshipping: Where the Lights Aren’t So Heavy

(Written for the Yu-Gi-Oh! Mini Exchange!)

[Also read on AO3!]

*-*-*-*

It wasn’t that Yugi didn’t like his job. He loved his job, almost as much as he loved his favorite burger joint, of which he had been a regular client almost since he could remember. The thing was, just because he loved something didn’t mean he didn’t grow tired of it every once in a while, or that he wasn’t grateful for it. He had no problem going out to eat burgers with his friends, but there came a point where the cycle went from “enjoyable” to “kind of disgusting, actually.” Damn it, sometimes Yugi just wanted pizza instead! Maybe even a damn salad!

(Okay, the salad thing was mostly his body demanding he eat some vegetables instead of continuing to feed on only fast food—please, for the love of the gods!—but the point still remained.)

His feelings towards his job were more or less the same. It wasn’t that he didn’t like it, because he did. It was just that, after a few years of being a professional duelist and going to tournaments and not really having as much of a social life as he would’ve liked to try to have, making a living off dueling started to slightly lose its appeal. Yugi wouldn’t ever give it up, he would never even dream of it; he knew how lucky he was to have gotten this far and how many people wished they’d been as lucky.

But then he would see the faces he had been surrounded by for half a decade and realize that the only reason he knew the names attached to them was because they were well-known in the dueling industry, not because they had introduced themselves to him or because he had asked them. With barely a moment to himself, it felt like he didn’t have the time to go and strike up a conversation with whoever had been his opponent just a moment ago before he was dragged off somewhere else.

Yugi wanted to strike up a conversation with them. That was the thing. He wanted to get to know the people he saw in every tournament outside of the arena in which they dueled. He wanted to be their friend, or at the very least their acquaintance. Where was the fun in being the King of Games if he couldn’t celebrate his victories and mourn his losses with the people he had fought against?

Then again, he wasn’t always the King of Games—that was a title he often exchanged with Sennen Atem, someone else whom Yugi knew almost nothing about and wanted to get to know better. It had become such a reoccurring exchange, in fact, that most of the time, they were both referred to as King of Games. Although Yugi had honestly found that slightly odd at first, he didn’t mind sharing the title with as worthy an opponent as Atem.

Maybe Yugi would get his chance to approach Atem and strike up a conversation at the Domino Convention Center, where an important press conference would be held, later today. He wasn’t sure what the press conference was about or what was going to be announced (he assumed it was either a tournament or the release of a new deck archetype), but as one of the Kings, his presence was politely required.

And by ‘politely required,’ Yugi thought as he fiddled with the leather cuffs around his wrists, it means that Ryou will have my head if I don’t show up.

That was fine. If it could get Yugi a 10-minute conversation with Atem, he would take it. Baby steps and all that.

The gods were apparently smiling down on Yugi today.

He had seen Sennen Atem at the press conference he had attended (in which a new tournament had been announced), but he hadn’t been able to go up to him and introduce himself during it. Then, after the press conference, Atem had left so suddenly that Yugi had lost sight of him. The convention center wasn’t as full as Yugi had expected it to be, but it was still incredibly crowded, and so he’d had no hopes of encountering Atem before the day was over, much less of having the chance to actually talk to him.

“Don’t look so down, Yugi,” Ryou had tried to cheer him up. “I’m sure you’ll get your chance to talk to him at another event!”

What if this keeps happening? Yugi had thought, crestfallen. What if this was what his life was meant to be? What if the only way he would ever know his fellow duelists was thanks to the media? What if he never had the chance to interact with them beyond tournament matches?

“Yeah,” he said out loud. “Yeah, I guess I will.”

Still, Yugi hadn’t given up on trying to find Atem. The guy had to be around here somewhere, right? He wouldn’t have just come to the press conference and then left immediately, right?

Yugi’s optimism and determination had, in the end, been rewarded. He had continued exploring the convention center until he came across a nearly empty room, and suddenly there was Atem, leaning back against the wall with his eyes closed, and this was the perfect opportunity Yugi had been waiting for!

He cleared his throat to catch Atem’s attention. “Um, excuse me? Sennen Atem?”

Atem opened his eyes and turned to look at him. He seemed to be about to say something, but then his eyes widened and his lips parted in surprise.

“Mutou Yugi,” he said as his mouth was overtaken by a smile. There was such kindness in his voice that it made Yugi grin.

Yugi held his hand out for a handshake. “It’s nice to finally meet you outside a tournament for a change.”

Atem chuckled, shaking Yugi’s hand. “Likewise. I assume you came to one of the press conferences?”

“Yeah, the one for Industrial Illusions’ new tournament in a month,” Yugi answered. He was kind of relieved that Atem hadn’t noticed him there. He had feared that Atem had seen him and purposefully avoided him, but now he could breathe calmly, knowing that hadn’t been the case.

“Wait, really?” Atem seemed to come to the realization that they had been in the same room for forty-five minutes and he hadn’t realized, because his cheeks suddenly flushed bright red and he stammered out his next words. “Oh, gods, I’m so sorry, I was there and I didn’t— if I had known, I— I-I hope you don’t think that I didn’t want to—”

“No, no, don’t worry!” Yugi hurriedly said. “I think I was a few rows behind, anyway.”

“Still,” Atem mumbled. The flush on his face lessened, but he still scratched the back of his neck. “I’m sorry.” The smile he gave Yugi this time was shy, so different than the smug, confident smirks that would cross his face during one of their matches, that Yugi couldn’t help chuckling slightly to himself.

“Seriously, there’s no need to apologize,” he assured Atem. “I would expect the King of Games’ attention to be on the press conference, not on the people attending it.”

“One of the Kings,” Atem replied. “Shared title and all that, remember? Besides, I haven’t forgotten how you beat me last tournament.”

Yugi hadn’t, either. He had used Gold Sarcophagus to lock away one of his cards, and if Atem happened to use the same card, its effects would be negated. When Atem had tried to use Monster Reborn to bring back one of his most powerful monsters, Gold Sarcophagus had negated it, leaving him open to Yugi’s final attack.

Not that Yugi was one to boost his own ego, but that had been quite a victory—the one he felt the proudest of, actually. He had taken a huge risk by locking away a card as useful as Monster Reborn, and it had been worth it in the end. Then again, now he also felt kind of embarrassed at the praise, especially coming from the guy he had defeated, despite the fact that Atem had congratulated him at the end of their duel. Thankfully, Atem saved him from having to respond.

“I’m looking forward to the next time we face each other,” he said. Yugi raised an eyebrow, the corner of his mouth quirking up.

“Already thinking about how to beat my strategy?” he teased.

“Maybe,” Atem answered, his smile turning into one of the smug smirks Yugi was used to. “Regardless of the result, though, I always enjoy facing off against you.”

Yugi had to press his lips together in order to hold back the grin threatening to overtake his mouth. Even though he obviously tried to win every single one of his duels, when he dueled Atem, he didn’t care about the outcome. The only thing that mattered to Yugi was how much fun he had, and he was beyond overjoyed that Atem apparently felt the same way he did.

“I could say the same thing,” he told Atem.

It was only until neither of them said anything that Yugi looked down between them and realized they were still holding hands. Almost as if Atem had come to the same conclusion just as suddenly, they both pulled their respective hand back, the two of them letting out a small laugh.

“So,” Yugi began after a moment. He leaned back against the wall next to Atem, their arms separated by the shortest of distances. “Any other press conferences you’re interested in attending?”

“Not… really?” Atem shrugged his shoulders and glanced around the room. “Social events and big crowds aren’t exactly my thing.”

“As opposed to Duel Monsters tournaments?” Yugi asked.

Another soft blush covered Atem’s cheeks. “Tournaments are different, I guess. It’s always just you and your opponent, and you don’t really have to worry about saying the wrong thing, you just have to focus on doing, you know?”

Yugi nodded his head. He never would’ve thought someone like Atem would be nervous in front of an audience, though he could understand the feeling.

“You should’ve seen me at my high school graduation,” he chuckled. Atem turned to him, his head cocked in a way that asked for more information. “I had to give a speech,” Yugi said, “but I was so scared of messing it up that I had to lock myself in an empty classroom for ten minutes to calm down.”

“What?” Atem demanded, as if he couldn’t believe such a thing had happened to Yugi. “No way!”

“I’m serious! I don’t mind big crowds, but don’t ask me to give a speech, please. That’s my one true weakness.”

“A bold fact to tell your opponent,” Atem said, his lips twisting into another smirk. Yugi narrowed his eyes at him.

“I was under the suspicion you were honorable enough to keep a secret outside the arena,” he said. “Should I not have been?”

Atem’s smirk became a genuine smile once more. He pressed his lips into a thin line and ran his thumb and index finger across them like he had just zipped his mouth shut. Then he pretended to throw an invisible key away. “Your secret’s safe with me.”

Yes, Yugi had thought as much. Still, he was glad to have confirmed it.

“If it makes you feel any better,” Atem began to say, “before my first tournament duel, I was so nervous and terrified that I actually threw up.”

“What?” Yugi almost shrieked, completely shocked by the confession. Atem had always seemed so confident, so sure of himself, so prepared for whatever challenge he might face. “I don’t believe you!”

“It’s true!”

“You?”

“I know, I know,” Atem said, laughing. “Once I started getting used to dueling, I got better, but I still feel sick before a match every now and then.” He leaned even more against the wall, as if revealing such a personal anecdote had taken a great amount of energy. Yugi felt… honored that it had been him whom Atem had confessed such a thing to.

He bumped their shoulders together. Once he had Atem’s attention, he mimicked his gesture from earlier, pretending to zip his mouth shut and throwing the key away.

“Your secret’s safe with me,” Yugi echoed.

The genuinely thankful smile Atem gave him made him feel like his chest was being squeezed, and he had to look away in order to breathe normally again. Who would’ve thought he would go from knowing close to nothing about Atem to knowing one of his deepest secrets, to being trusted with one of his deepest secrets?

I should’ve done this years ago, Yugi thought. He shook his head. At least he had finally been given the chance to do it, no matter how long it had taken.

The room they were in suddenly started to fill with more people. Yugi assumed another press conference had probably finished, and these were the people who had attended it. Maybe a tournament was about to start, and these were the participants.

Next to him, Atem shifted his weight from one leg to the other one. Yugi recalled what Atem had just told him, that social events and big crowds weren’t his thing, and he couldn’t help admiring him for his bravery. It couldn’t be easy for him to be in a place that made him so uncomfortable, and yet here he was. He was definitely worthy of the title of King of Games.

“I could really use some fresh air,” Yugi said. “Do you want to get out of here?”

Atem turned his head to look at him. Yugi was giving him the chance to walk out of a situation he might want to escape, but he was also giving him the chance to stay if he so wished. He really wanted to continue talking to Atem, but he wanted to ensure that Atem was in a space in which he felt comfortable instead of trapped or anxious.

Atem crossed his arms over his chest and raised a curious eyebrow. A smile was tugging at his lips. “What did you have in mind?”

Feeling slightly bolder, Yugi held out his hand, his palm facing upwards, and said, “I guess you’ll have to find out.”

Atem glanced down at his hand and then at Yugi, back at his hand and back at Yugi again. For a moment, he didn’t say or do anything, and Yugi felt little sweat beads start to form on his temples. Had he gone too far? Had he crossed a line he hadn’t even known was there? Had he ruined his chances of becoming Atem’s friend before they could even be called that?

I really want to get to know you better, Yugi thought, hoping he could somehow transmit the message to Atem through his eyes.

To his luck, it appeared that he managed to do so. Atem’s smile widened into a grin.

“I guess I will,” he said. He grabbed Yugi’s hand and squeezed it as if he never wanted to let go.

Yugi grinned back. The feeling was mutual.

#puzzleshipping #yugioh #yugioh fic #puzzleshipping fic #puzzleshipping fanfic #riku's fics #i really wanna write a second part to this??#i have this image of them sneaking around and avoiding paparazzi haha #so i might write it eventually #as always reblogs are really appreciated uwu

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douxreviews · 6 years ago

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American Gods - ‘The Secret of Spoons’ Review

“The world is either crazy, or you are. They’re both solid options.”

American Gods' second episode presents us with a game of two halves. On every possible level that you can interpret that phrase.

The first time I saw this episode, I had two thoughts about it. The first was that I loved every single thing about the opening sequence introducing Anansi. The second was that it was kind of a dull filler episode that just existed to set up things that needed to be set up for the rest of the season.

Taking these in order; Yes. Every single thing about Anansi, both in this scene and going forward, is amazing. It's impossible to take your eyes off of Orlando Jones as he moves through the hold of the slave ship, and he has the sort of charisma that genuinely gets religious movements started in the real world. The moment when he mentions slavery existing for the purpose of harvesting cotton and indigo and then crisply pulls down on the seam of his own purple shirt as if to angrily straighten it is a great character beat, and I'd very much like to know if it was the product of the script, the direction, or the actor. It also helps that every single thing Anansi says is undeniably true.

This is one of the growing number of instances where the casting decision to have Shadow as a person of color instead of as a white man is benefiting the show. Last week we had the lynching, and all of the historically uncomfortable imagery associated with it. This week we have the opening scene on the slave ship unexpectedly echoed later in the episode when Czernobog speaks about race in a way that American's tend to find uncomfortably direct. Technically, Anansi's opening sequence doesn't have anything to do with the episode other than introducing another-God-who-will-be-important-later, but the fact that the beginning of the episode speaks about race so directly gives the discussion about race later in the episode an additional depth that it wouldn't have otherwise had.

It also sets up the concept of duality, of things being separated into black and white, which leads me to my second point.

"Shit. You all don’t know you black yet. You think you just people."

That line, outside from underlining the unfathomable inhumanity of the slave trade, also sets up what I missed about this episode the first time around. You have what you think is one thing, and suddenly it's two things that are artificially divided and set up in opposition to one another. 'Just people' suddenly split into black and white. Czernobog and his brother, divided into being 'the good one' and 'the bad one' by the people around them. The normal, mundane world that Shadow has known, and the world of Gods and beliefs that he's gradually learning exists. This whole episode is about bringing Shadow to the realization that there is a second world, the 'world under the world' to quote Shadow himself, and that those two worlds are simultaneously both separate from one another and both the same thing. As the episode is structured, that's the point of the checkers match. It's a nice symbol for the concept, because it's ostensibly two sides fighting in opposition, and yet the checkers are all equal, as Shadow points out when they're talking at dinner about checkers versus chess.

So, my first take on the episode as regards it existing just to set up things for the rest of the season was both correct and incorrect. Yes, it sets up Anansi, reminds us that Bilquis is still out there, introduces us to Media and tells us Technical Boy's name. But what's important is what it's doing underneath that.

The episode itself is roughly split into halves. The first half is Shadow tying up loose threads so that he's free to go with Mr. Wednesday, and the second half is setting up the quest for the rest of the season by revealing to us that Wednesday is reaching out to other Gods for some reason. Shadow's job is going to be to take him from one God to the next so that Wednesday can talk to them. Put like that, it sounds like it's a fairly utilitarian episode, but what I missed was Wednesday's line toward the end. "I'm easing him into it." he tells Zorya Vechernyaya, and that's the point of the episode. This isn't a plot structural cleanup exercise, as I first thought it was. It's the story of how Wednesday gradually breaks Shadow away from his old life and slowly introduces new concepts to him so that he's ready for what's to come. First he lets Shadow see that he's meeting with the mysterious man in the sunglasses but doesn't let him attend, then, once Shadow has understood that, Wednesday lets him attend the meeting with Czernobog. It's a gradual indoctrination, and I think it's nicely handled.

With this in mind, I now firmly believe that he sent Shadow on his own to the store specifically so that Media would reach out to him there, thus introducing Shadow to 'The Opposition,' as it were. They make a lot in this series about how manipulative Wednesday is, but if you watch Ian McShane in the background you can see it happening in real time And by the way, how great was Gillian Anderson as Media? She doesn't exactly sound like Lucy, but she has the look and mannerisms down, and she owns it in a way that you can't help but feel like she just did the world's best Lucy impression. Note also, Media makes a clear distinction between being Lucille Ball and being Lucy Ricardo. Again, this underscores the real world/world of fantasy duality.

So, an episode that appears on the surface to be just doing a job, but which, if you scratch the surface, is doing a hell of a lot with one hand while it distracts you with the other. That's kind of Wednesday in a nutshell, isn't it.

Quotes:

Anansi: "Once upon a time, a man got f**ked." Truthfully, Anansi's whole opening speech could be copied here, but this was a great lead in.

Anansi: "Take swimming lessons. This is how we get stereotypes.”

Shadow: "What the f**k did you do?" Wednesday: "Well, that depends on who you ask."

Wednesday: "You sir, or only obligated to feel bad about that for so long."

Media: "Time and Attention. Better than lamb's blood."

Zorya Vechernyaya: "Family is who you survive with when you need to survive. Even when you do not like them."

Czernobog: "You’re black, right?"

Czernobog: "A shame. You’re my only black friend."

Bits and Pieces:

-- This show specifically, and Fuller generally, use the language of television really well. The transitional shot from Bilquis on her bed to the statue in the museum was worth three pages of explanation about her in a book. Ditto the transition where her body appeared beneath the jewelry in the display case. Everything we really need to know about her is expressed in those two shots.

-- Speaking of Bilquis, I consistently wonder what exactly the casting call notice for this part said. Were the words 'Sex to death' part of it, or did they save that discussion for the second callback?

-- The beautiful and psychedelic transitional montage from Dylan's 'Hard Rain Gonna Fall', up through the universe, into the celestial realms, light splintering in iridescent casc... whoops, check out this erection!! That's kind of the show's aesthetic in a nutshell, isn't it.

-- The shot of Laura, lying in lingerie on the bed like she was selling perfume cutting to the actual unmade bed was also a nice dream v. reality moment. Also, showing a lead character in dreams and illusions is a standard way of keeping an actor as a regular on the show while you're waiting for a big reveal about that character. This is how they kept David Boreanez in the credits for the first three episodes of Buffy season three. I'm just saying.

-- I could have lived without the unrequested dick pic showing up in Shadow's wedding photo. And now I know how every woman on Tinder feels.

-- We don't get any answer as to who saved Shadow from the lynching.

-- Also, this week we have no Mad Sweeney, Audrey, or Technical Boy. I missed the first two.

-- The cinematography on the sequence where Shadow filled the bathtub was very pretty. Naked Ricky Whittle was... also pretty.

-- The shots of Czernobog killing the cows were very upsetting. I know no actual cows were hurt, but still.

-- If you pause on the shopping list, it's all legitimately stuff we see them use over the next couple of episodes.

-- You can tell they're dealing in fantasy – the packing tape dispenser never jammed once.

On closer evaluation, this episode has a lot more going for it than it appeared. The question this begs is, should an episode require closer inspection in order to be good television? There's legitimate room for differences of opinion on this issue.

Three and a half cows which are totally still alive and were not brained with a hammer.

Mikey Heinrich is, among other things, a freelance writer, volunteer firefighter, and roughly 78% water. You can find more of his work at the 42nd Vizsla.

#American Gods #Neil Gaiman #Shadow Moon #Mr. Wednesday #Anansi #American Gods Reviews #Doux Reviews #TV Reviews

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head-and-heart · 6 years ago

Text

The 100 Highlights - “How We Get To Peace” (5x08)

Hey everyone! Sorry for the long wait for this highlight post. I was out of town visiting family for a week and didn’t get a chance to rewatch the episode until today. And, unfortunately, I am about to be swapped for the next ten days (at least) so you can probably expect the 5x09 highlight post to be pretty late, too.

... And the 5x10 recap.

But anyway - super excited to get into this episode! Hope you enjoy my thoughts. :)

Feel free to read up on the previous posts in this series here.

“I’ve seen the horrors we inflict on each other in the name of survival, colonel. God knows I’m as guilty as anyone, but we’re on the brink here - on the edge of an abyss I’ve stared into before - and I can tell you, having sacrificed the few to save the many more times than I care to admit, eventually, the few becomes the many. The ends don’t always justify the means and if you don’t know that by now, after everything you’ve been through, then you’re just as bad as Octavia, and we’re already lost.”

At first I was a bit thrown by Kane’s speech here because Charmaine’s move was, objectively, very politically savvy (and it seemed a little out of place, considering Kane was the one who implied that if Charmaine got rid of McCreary she wouldn’t have to be concerned about resistance anymore but whatever) but - in retrospect - I do see the value in it. It seems to reflect what Bellamy and Clarke do later in the episode to Kara Cooper (which was honestly SO fucked up guys, like, holy shit). And the line was well delivered too. Very dramatic.

I kind of like this Vincent guy. Hm. Seems too nice to be a cannibal/serial killer. Speaking of which, are we ever going to see him snap? Maybe in 5x11 ... and that’s when we’ll get Abby telling the story of what happened in The Dark Year. :o I’ve cracked the code fam

Echo suggesting that they kill Zeke made her more familiar to me. Her character arc seems pretty on track (based on this episode) with what I have already speculated and I expect that we’re going to see her facing some issues with her old methods soon (maybe next episode?). I did like how they have set up her character arc in this episode.

I’m really enjoying that they have Indra teaming up with our mains this season. It’s an interesting dynamic, to see her interacting with characters besides Octavia and Kane this season and I am really enjoying it.

LEMME TAKE A MOMENT TO TALK ABOUT ZEKE PUTTING HIS HAND IN FRONT OF RAVEN PROTECTIVELY K

Listen, I know that their relationship has no base to it and they barely know each other and their connection doesn’t even really make sense *realistically* but I really, really LOVE Raven and Zeke’s dynamic. Lindsey and Jordan have fantastic chemistry and they look so good together and Zeke and Raven’s personalities/intellect complement each other so well. Also, this is a television show so lack of development DOESN’T MATTER, especially considering Zeke hasn’t killed Raven’s family or ex boyfriend or anything which - if you ask me - is a definite bonus! I just loved that little detail of him looking out for her, despite being angry (and having every right to be) because he feels protective of her and can’t really explain why just yet.

Also, I am in no way delusional enough to believe that the writers intentionally paralleled Bellarke and Zaven in this episode but this moment was visually extremely reminiscent of Bellamy jumping in front of Clarke in 2x09 ... so that’s a plus.

Everything involving Raven and Abby in this episode was just the most gut-wrenching, fam. Raven’s concern over Abby being threatened by Diyoza and her determination to protect her and Abby lying was just ... a Lot. It shows how far gone Abby is and added some new stakes to her addiction. I think it was important to show how Abby and Raven’s relationship will be affected by this.

“Your mother would be proud, Monty.” I wonder if anyone has told Monty this before, and how much he probably needed to hear it. In all that had happened, I forgot that Kara Cooper and Monty come from the same station on the Ark, and that they have probably even known each other for a long time. I never would have guessed that I would love seeing them interact so much but their scenes in this episode were so cute? Cooper laughing at Monty’s jokes about getting lit was the scene I didn’t know I needed. Leave it to The 100 to humanize the Worst character in the episode they get killed

THE ORIGINAL MURDER TRIO IS BACK AND AT IT AGAIN

I have to admit, in a kind of sick way I liked that we had Monty, Clarke, and Bellamy back at their old shenanigans again? Like, this felt like an indirect callback to Mount Weather, where they all committed mass murder together. This time, they’re trying to prevent that from happening again. It’s weird to see how their old allegiances and perspectives have shifted from that moment - and yet, they all continue to cooperate with each other.

“What’s one more, right? We’re all murderers.” OOF MONTY I FELT THAT

“We’re talking about taking one life to save hundreds.” “Really? Then let’s kill Octavia.” I literally yelled DRAG HIM at my screen when he said this lmao. Monty had ALL the lines in this episode. Like, damn, I love that he is questioning Bellamy and Clarke’s decisions in this, how they just revert so easily back to their same old methods. It’s refreshing to see.

And also, he’s RIGHT. What Bellamy and Clarke are doing is so fucking twisted. They are literally killing someone in the most grotesque manner and framing them for something they didn’t even do all in order to avoid killing someone else - the person who forced her to commit the atrocities she has in the first place. Let’s face it: Cooper is easy to hate but the only reason she is the way she is is because of the system that Octavia created, the game Octavia forced her to play. And yet, they won’t kill Octavia, because of their own selfish wishes. It is absolutely fucked up and I am so glad that Monty called them out on their bullshit.

I really loved Murphy looking at Clarke’s drawing of him and Emori chained to the rocket from 4x08. It was a nice detail (and parallel to Season 4′s corresponding episode) and callback to include. Here’s hoping that we get to see *cough* other characters looking at pictures of themselves that Clarke has drawn. You know ... no one in particular.

“Tell me what we’re looking at.”

“I don’t think we’d see it the same way, but all right. That’s where the trading post will be. And next to it will be a farm, and a workshop, and a mill ... And a real medical center, for Abby. To the south, there’ll be homes dug out of the ground to preserve the trees, and at the center, there’ll be a well, a place for people to gather, talk, debate ideas.”

“And a school with a playground where kids can blow off steam and bitch about their teachers and kiss under the bleachers. My kid.”

LET ME TALK ABOUT THIS SCENE !!! I LOVED THIS SCENE.

I think this is the very first time (with the exception of Briller and the chickens) where any character has explicitly voiced their greatest wishes for the future, how it looks in their mind. And it’s so fucking tragic because you can just visualize it so clearly, but it feels so far away. That future doesn’t seem possible. It’s so melancholy and I love how Ian and Ivana delivered their lines in this scene.

Also, soft!Charmaine is EVERYTHING. Her line about the school and the teenagers “bitching” and making out and doing regular teenage thing was just so ... normal, it was honestly startling to think about. That’s the life that the hundred should have had - that they’ll never get now. I love the baby storyline so much (and I never thought I would like a pregnancy storyline but I do) because it humanizes Diyoza in so many ways.

The music in this scene was gorgeous and matched the tone so well, I honestly started tearing up a little bit don’t @ me. I have a really big feeling that this discussion will come up again - either because we’re going to see this vision completely destroyed, or because we’re going to see it come to fruition. With the space travel theory, I do kind of wonder if we might get an “epilogue” of sorts for the people who stay behind on Eden, where we see Kane and Diyoza’s vision has come true (and maybe they’ll both even be there). It would be like a farewell to the characters who remain on Earth. I think it would be beautiful. (But that’s all assuming that the space travel theory is correct.)

As mildly annoying as it was that Kane literally named Diyoza’s baby for her (wtf Kane???) I did appreciate the symbolic purpose of naming her child “Hope”, especially considering the episode title “Pandora’s Box”, in which hope (aka. Kane/Baby) was the last out of the bunker and then flew away with Eligius. It’s a nice follow up to that little piece of mythology.

In a way, Kane, Abby, and Charmaine are delivering Hope (literally and figuratively) to the people. Which is also why I believe that they may all remain behind in Eden at the end of this season as we see our mains (ie. Clarke, Bellamy, Raven, etc) take off into cryo sleep, officially saying goodbye to all of them forever. (Goddamn I’m already crying and the season finale hasn’t even aired yet? THe fuck)

Also side note to talk about how vindicating it was when Kane was judging Charmaine the entire episode about her damn notebook (”names of the people you killed?” stfu) and it turned out to just be a goddamn list of baby names and defense strategies. Sit the fuck down, Mark.

I present to you: the creepiest fucking shot this show has done. And yet, I really liked it? Showing Cooper’s reactions by shooting through her helmet was a really well done creative choice. It was so trippy and it made her death feel so visceral and real. It honestly kind of sickens me to watch this scene, tbh.

On another note, I cannot BELIEVE how many stomachs Jason has forced me to watch explode this season .. the audacity ...

Emori establishing healthy boundaries is ... EVERYTHING. It’s so important for the writers to have addressed the toxicity in their relationship in this way.

“Trouble in paradise?” I kind of love that McCreary says this to Memori because it is exactly what Murphy said to Clarke and Finn in 5x06 after the massacre. That’s some sweet kind of karma right there

Everything about Raven and Abby in this episode was absolutely devastating. Lindsey and Paige both killed this scene - the emotions were so real. Lindsey did such an amazing job portraying Raven’s hurt and rage - I could feel her emotions so viscerally.

“Don’t you talk to me about pain.” If anyone deserves that line, it is Raven. She has been through hell and back and has had to be so strong for so long. I really liked that line.

CLARKE SITTING ON BELLAMY’S BED IN HIS TENT. Man, I would LOVE to see how that scene went askskqisks

Also, Clarke comforting my poor baby just like old times ... *sigh*

Although I have some reservations with the dialogue in this scene, I do appreciate the sentiment. Despite everything that has happened, Bellamy and Clarke still have such an understanding of each other. They forgive so easily - it’s practically second nature at this point. While I hated how Jason Rothenberg-y Bellamy sounded when he called Clarke a “mama bear” it IS nice that he is acknowledging the role that Madi plays in Clarke’s life. I feel like he finally is starting to understand just how crucial she is to Clarke, and recognizing that he felt the same way about Octavia. It gives them something new to connect over. Also, I’ll never turn down Bellarke being soft with each other.

Plus, have you ever seen a softer smile than Clarke Griffin’s? Cause oh boy am I not over that. She looks so fucking bashful when she looks up at Bellamy I can’t deal gotDAMN

“The worms were already loaded in the rover, so. What was Cooper doing there?” Marie’s delivery in this episode was SO good. God, she’s so creepy and she’s Killing It.

“Careful, big brother, or I’ll think you helped her and we’d have enough prisoners to settle this in the ring.” LISTEN. I WANTED THE EVERLARK AU SO FREAKING BAD CAN YOU IMAGINE WHAT NEW MEANING THE WORD “TOGETHER” WOULD HAVE HOLY SHIT

But also, Bellamy’s desperate looks/protests were A Lot in this scene. He really can’t fathom losing Clarke again. His and Clarke’s tragic looks towards each other just really fucking hurt - they’ve been here before. And last time, they didn’t see each other for six years.

“Keep Madi safe. Promise me.” “I promise.”

GOD. CLARKE LITERALLY JUST GAVE HIM FUCKING CUSTODY OF HER CHILD UMMMMM HOW ONE DOES FUNCTION??? She trusts him so much i’mma cry. Also, his called out promise. He sounds so wrecked, but he needs her to know that he will keep Madi safe, needs her to have that comfort, just in case he never sees her again. Don’t Touch Me.

“Did he hurt you?” Protective!Zeke is always a plus but I’d be lying if I said that this scene didn’t immediately remind me of Bellamy asking Clarke the same damn question in 1x10. God, these unintentional Blarke parallels are really coming for my life huh

“Have you ever loved someone so much that no matter what they do to you, or themselves, you take it?” “Mom or dad?” “Mom. Drank herself to death.” I loved that Raven has finally found someone she can open up to. Feels Good, feels Organic. But also this scene came for my LIFE it was so angsty and so good. Raven breaking down absolutely ENDED me (and Zeke comforting her ... someone call 911). I really loved how they made the parallel between Raven’s mom and Abby - it just made the previous scene all the more devastating. So often it feels like the writers on this show forget about these characters backstory and I’m so happy to get these little callbacks every once in awhile.

“The answer is yes.” The fact that Raven and Zeke have this new unexpected thing to relate about is A Lot. I felt this scene deep in my bones.

Plot twist: Abby dies because she is eaten by Vincent, and her withdrawal symptoms are just a red herring to keep us on our feet. ;)

“So much for The 100.” Hello, favourite line of this episode. Y’all have no idea (NO IDEA) how much it means to me to hear a reference to the heart of this show again, especially from Bellamy. He hasn’t forgotten, but it appears that Miller has. Wow. I felt that one.

“I can’t let you kill Clarke, O.” NO YOU CANNOT

“Here we go again. Pleading for the life of a traitor ... who you love.” DO I NEED TO SAY ANYTHING ABOUT THIS LINE HONESTLY Y’ALL ALREADY KNOW WHY IT ENDED ME

BELLAMY’S FUCKING FACE JOURNEY HOLY SHIT. THEY FOCUS ON HIS FACE FOR SO LONG AND YOU CAN JUST SEE - YOU CAN SEE - HIS INTERNAL STRUGGLE. GOD.

I totally overlooked this the first time I watched it but I love how Bellamy tells Octavia that HE made a deal with Diyoza. Clarke has already been sentenced to death and still, he’s protecting her. He won’t let Clarke get hurt for the deal she made - instead, he takes the blame. I just love him a lot fam.

Bob and Marie’s acting in that final scene was SO FREAKING GOOD. Both of them killed it. It was so devastating.

“My sister, my responsibility.” While I was predicting before that this line would happen if Bellamy had to kill Octavia, the fact that it came back in the same context (with Bellamy having to protect others from Octavia, rather than the other way around) was so perfect. I love when writers take old lines and give them new meanings and that’s exactly what they did with Bellamy’s old mantra. It was so powerful.

AND HE DID IT ALL FOR CLARKE. HE CHOSE FUCKING CLARKE. I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT TO SAY???

So.

That was a wild ride.

Hope you enjoyed reading my take on 5x08 and my favourite parts! Looking forward to the next episode in a few days. See ya then!

#the 100 #the 100 highlights series #posts by moi

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peanutbutterjelly-pie · 7 years ago

Text

Nobody’s Fault But Mine

content: Castiel just should have listened. He seriously should have. But instead he found himself hypnotized by those beautiful green eyes and he totally missed the most important thing in the process.

Pairings: Dean/Castiel, minor Sam/Eileen

word count: 6.1k

[AO3]

It's on a cloudy Thursday morning when Castiel realizes that he got himself a serious crush on one of his regular patrons.

The whole thing was completely unplanned, of course. Castiel has about a thousand other things on his mind, with him opening his new bakery in a popular part of the town, being all proud and self-assured after having managed to survive the long months of bank issues and renovations that took way longer than expected, feeling all confident and happy when the first reactions on the opening day turned out be quite positive and people came back the next morning to get themselves a new fix.

It's been a very stressful few months and he's actually got no time for an obnoxious infatuation.

But since the day the green-eyed man walked through the door for the very first time Castiel's interest was piqued. He greeted Castiel with a dazzling smile, his beautiful eyes brimming, and somehow just two minutes later they found themselves in a exhilarating discussion about Vonnegut. Castiel totally forgot about the line getting longer and longer behind the man, so captivated by their interaction that it took one of his employees nudging his shoulder and calling his name quite loudly to train his attention back to the situation at hand.

Castiel flushed fiercely as he noticed the approximately twenty pairs of eyes staring at him and mumbles a hasty apology. The gorgeous man, however, just chuckled amused, winked at him and whispered, “I'll see you around, Castiel.”

Castiel blinked a few times before his gaze flickered to the leather bracelet on the guy's left wrist that said “SAM” in capital letters, rejoicing that destiny was making it easy for a change and was giving him that stunning man's name on a silver platter, before answering, “Until next time, Sam.”

He laughed, the sound so rich and beautiful that Castiel entirely missed what Sam said afterwards as he was waving and walking away.

For the rest of the morning Castiel was unable to concentrate on even the simplest tasks and eventually banned into the back office so he wouldn't destroy any equipment.

It only got worse when Sam showed up the next day.

And the day after that.

He indeed kept true to his words.

Every single morning, right before work, he drops by the bakery, distracting Castiel with his everything to a point of no return. Castiel finds himself knocking over cups and stumbling over his words and blushing more than he has ever blushed before in his entire life combined and it's the best part of his day.

So yes, when he eventually realizes, on that cloudy Thursday morning, that he might be a little bit smitten, he's not really surprised.

The more he learns about this man, the more besotted he becomes.

Sam is at least very keen to share. He always turns toward Castiel when he arrives, no matter who's standing behind the counter, and immediately begins to talk as though he wants to squeeze as much information (and learn even more) in their daily two-minute encounters.

He rambles about his job as a high school teacher, obviously highly fond of his kids although he tries to sound exasperated, about his friends and their weird hobbies (Castiel never knew what LARPing meant until now) and about anything else that comes to his mind. He's definitely a very interesting person to talk with – one week they're overly engrossed with J.K. Rowling and the political issues in her works before switching right back to Sam attempting to convince Castiel to share the recipe of his by now kind of famous pie (which apparently became the love of Sam's life, as he is always quick to explain).

More often than not Sam is accompanied by his brother, a mountain of a man with shaggy hair and a kind smile. Obviously they both have apartments close to each other right around to corner and they meet up almost every morning to pick up some breakfast and coffee before going to work. It seems to be some kind of ritual they both cherish and Castiel finds it rather sweet, to be honest.

It's obvious that Sam's fairly proud of his “little” genius and although he's keeping his praise to a minimum to not make his brother uncomfortable, Sam's face says it all.

Their tight bond gets especially clear by Dean wearing the same leather bracelet on his wrist as his brother, saying “DEAN”. Apparently it had been a joined gift by someone important to them both and they decided long ago to keep it close, every single day.

Sam gets a bit emotional when he mentions the story to Castiel one day. He tries to tame it, even laughs and waves it off as though it's an old tale no one should pay too much attention to, and obviously keeps it vague and brief on purpose, but there is a light in his eyes he just can't hide.

It's all very moving and Castiel almost envies them their devotion. He doesn't have a special person in his life that would share such a small yet meaningful gesture with him.

Sam is indeed a very lucky man.

“Nah, I wouldn't go that far,” Sam counters when Castiel tells him so. “A lot of shit happened too. But I guess all in all my life's quite alright so far.”

“Well, my brother would laugh at me if I'd propose matching bracelets,” Castiel explains with a smile, imagining Gabriel falling off a chair roaring with laughter.

“Well, my stupid Sasquatch over there,” he nods at Dean who's checking something on his phone, completely ignoring them, “he didn't have much of a choice, didn't he? When Bobby gave those wristbands to us, he couldn't just say 'no' and leave it with that.”

However, there's a waver in Sam's voice, making it crystal clear that there's much more to the story than he'd heard so far. But Castiel doesn't mean to pry, so he simply smiles gently and says, “You may not believe me, but you are a lucky man.”

Sam studies him for a moment and eventually admits, “Maybe you're right. After all, a really awesome bakery just opened close to my place. I'd call that lucky indeed.”

Castiel chuckles. “If you say so.”

“And the nice owner is definitely a bonus, too.”

Sam freaking winks at him after that and Castiel can't control a way too obvious blush to save his life.

He's absolutely screwed.

Sam, though, just stares at him as though seeing Castiel all flustered is the best thing that ever happened to him.

“Perhaps I'm indeed a very lucky man.”

* * * * *

Life seems to be perfect for a change.

Castiel can't recall ever feeling so alive, so full of energy. Even the mere thought of seeing Sam, just for a few minutes, elates him in a way he never imagined.

And then, of course, everything goes to hell.

It starts when Jo places a cake order on a rainy Friday afternoon.

She's a friend of Sam and Dean's that had been dragged in by Sam one day and instantly returned the next one on her own account for “another round of those criminally delicious cinnamon rolls”. Since then she shows up regularly and always finds time to chat easily with Castiel for a moment.

“It needs to be a big cake,” she emphasizes. “Chocolate. Lots of chocolate.”

Castiel's lips curl upward. “I assume it's a special occasion?”

Jo nods enthusiastically. “Engagement,” she announces. “Sam finally popped the question. Took the moron long enough, in my opinion.”

Castiel freezes at those words and he simply gapes at Jo, desperately trying to find some coherent speech in his head. “Sam?” he eventually croaks.

He must have misheard, right?

Because there's no way that Sam would never have mentioned a significant other. That's usually something people tell each other, even if their meetings are fairly brief. At least when that specific partner important enough to marry them.

However, Jo crushes his hope just a moment later. “Yep,” she confirms, nodding enthusiastically and being rather oblivious to Castiel's shock. “Sam and Eileen are dating since the dawn of time. They're ridiculously cute together.” She looks up. “I guess you haven't met her yet?”

Castiel merely shakes his head, not trusting his voice.

Before his inner eye he sees freckles and a blinding smile and instead of the familiar joy Castiel feels a huge wave of disappointment.

Granted, he never got his hopes up in the first place because life can be cruel and unfair, but particularly in the last week he actually got the impression that Sam's interest in him wasn't purely platonic. Castiel isn't an expert on flirting and wooing, far from it, but according to his employees Hannah and Alfie Sam has been becoming less and less subtle for some time now. They both had assured Castiel that Sam's flirting game was strong.

But now ��?

Apparently they all had been majorly wrong.

Castiel feels his heart plummet and it takes all his strength not to show it on the outside. Instead he forces a (probably very unconvincing) smile on his lips and says, “I'm glad to hear they're happy.”

“They sure as hell are,” Jo agrees, studying the pastries in the display intently and completely missing the waver in Castiel's voice. “Meant to be and all. Dean's thrilled too, you know. Excited to be the best man, that dork.”

She keeps on and on about the upcoming wedding and the beautiful couple, but everything is a blur to Castiel after that as he wallows quietly in his misery.

So much for the man of his dreams.

* * * * *

Sam shows up the next morning, right on schedule.

He beams brightly at Castiel, glowing like someone who has everything he ever wanted in his life, and Castiel can't even keep feeling sorry for himself when seeing Sam so gleeful.

He deserves all the happiness.

Even if that means that it will take a bit longer until Castiel finds his.

“Hey, Cas,” Sam says cheerfully. He started to use the shortened version of Castiel's name a while ago and Castiel found himself liking it, especially hearing it out of Sam's mouth. He's got a specific way of pronouncing his name that makes Castiel shiver all over.

“Hello, Sam,” Castiel greets politely.

Sam laughs. “That never gets old, man.”

Castiel isn't exactly sure what he's referring to, but he refrains from asking. A lot of Sam's references are going straight over his head.

“I heard about the engagement,” he says instead, being fairly proud of himself for sounding somewhat mature and calm. “It's excellent news.”

“It's great, right?” Sam grins broadly. “I mean, it's long overdue, to be honest. And Eileen's seriously awesome, she's gonna be a perfect addition to our family.” He cocks his head to one side. “Okay, technically she's been part of the family for years, but now it'll be official. On paper and stuff.”

He indeed sounds overly excited and Castiel's heart melts at the sight.

“That's good,” he mutters. His chest constricts unpleasantly, his body apparently highly displeased with Castiel shoving down all his emotions rather violently, but at the same time watching Sam's beautiful smile radiating like this is the most amazing thing ever.

All in all it's very confusing.

“So … um, do you maybe have a minute?” Sam wonders, glancing at the short line of customers nearby that is currently served by Hannah. “If you're not too busy or something, of course …”

Castiel can't exactly be sure due to the bright light, but it seems like Sam's cheeks are tinging pink.

“Uh, yes,” Castiel agrees. At first he considers declining because he isn't exactly sure whether he'd be able to keep his feelings at bay for long in the man's presence, but Sam's stunning green eyes obviously have the power to make him throw caution to the wind. “I can spare a minute or two.”

“Great,” Sam answers, but he sounds surprisingly nervous all of a sudden. “There … well, there is something I wanted to ask you.”

Castiel steps a bit to the right so they would have a little bit of privacy. “What is it?”

Sam licks his lips, his gaze dropping to his feet. “Um … there's a movie festival this weekend. Not sure if you've heard of it. Lots of classics and stuff.” He takes a deep breath. “And I wonder if you wanna go there. Maybe. With … with me.”

Castiel raises his brows in confusion. That almost sounds like a date.

It actually sounds quite definitely like date.

For one, beautiful moment Castiel believes that he got it all wrong, that he misinterpreted Jo's words as much as Sam's and that there's an absolute logical explanation for all of this, that he's free to go to this festival with Sam, enjoy their joined time and perhaps kiss him when the night is over …

It seems wonderful.

And yet again, it's just a dream. Because he didn't misunderstand anything! There is no denying it – Sam is marrying someone named Eileen, obviously his girlfriend of many years now, and there is no place for a pining baker in between.

Sam obviously just wants to be nice. It's apparent he's enjoying his little talks with Castiel every morning and he's keen to turn this into a real friendship.

And it's sweet and thoughtful and Castiel finds himself recoiling.

He's not sure if he's ready for that yet. Yes, he would love to be friends with Sam because he's kind and funny and just the type of person everyone wants to have in their lives, one way or another, but Castiel knows that he has to get over this whole mess first before being able to accept Sam's offer.

Otherwise it would break his heart.

“Thank you for thinking of me,” Castiel says, his following smile not reaching his eyes. “But I'm afraid I have no time at the moment. Building a new business … it's …” He heaves a breath, feeling every single cell in his body protesting. “Maybe another time.”

Sam's expression slips for a split second, morphing into something so crestfallen that Castiel finds himself on the verge to take it all back immediately, his own emotions be damned, but just then Sam schools his features back and clears his throat.

“It's, uh, it's cool, man,” he shrugs it off, a watery smile on his lips. “I imagine it being very … time-consuming and stuff. Another time then.”

Castiel instantly wants to assure Sam that he's a wonderful man and he'd love to spend more time with him, that everyone should be lucky who considers him a friend – he wants to do about everything to never see that look on his face ever again –, but just as he opens his mouth, eager to let Sam know, Sam mumbles a quick “Bye” and walks out of the door before anyone's able to stop him.

* * * * *

After that their brief encounters turn quite stilted.

Sam still smiles at him as he ignores the other employees to get his order straight from Castiel, but it seems stiff like it takes all kinds of effort to maintain it. He offers a few anecdotes of his life, asks Castiel a few questions in return, though it's not the same anymore. There are no carefree laughs, no casual touches, no lingering looks. Instead he avoids Castiel's gaze more often than not before hastily saying his goodbyes and actually fleeing the bakery.

It's clear as crystal that he'd rather be anywhere else and only keeps up pretenses out of politeness.

Just a few days later he doesn't show his face at all anymore. It's only his brother Dean who walks in and orders some pastries and two coffees, making it fairly obvious that Sam isn't far behind, but doesn't want to interact with Castiel.

It stays that way for about a week.

Dean always stares at him as though he's desperate to say something, to meddle, and part of Castiel actually hopes he would really do so because he's dying to make things right again somehow and he's got no idea how to even start, but in the end Dean just keeps quiet on the matter.

It only changes when one day Dean shows up in the company of a young woman.

Dean and her have a short, apparently rather heated discussion in sign language, making it obvious that she's probably deaf or at least hearing-impaired, before she eventually focuses her gaze on Castiel and stride towards him, looking frighteningly determined.

“You're Castiel?” she asks and it almost sounds like a challenge.

Castiel figures that it's most likely not a wise move to cross this woman as he nods timidly.

“Eileen,” Dean pipes in, exasperated as he gets himself into her line of sight so she's able to see his lips movements. “We really shouldn't –”

“We really should,” she counters. “I'm sick of all the miserable moping.”

“Eileen,” Dean says once again, rubbing his face.

Meanwhile, Castiel fixes his eyes on Sam's fiancée. The whole time he wondered how she would be like and now he has to admit she's everything he imagined her to be. Beautiful and fierce and obviously not willing to take anyone's shit.

No wonder Sam is so excited to make her part of their family.

“I normally don't like to get involved,” Eileen states, her hard gaze focusing on Castiel. “I think that people should be capable of dealing with their own stuff. But that stupid moron is my future brother-in-law and somehow I care for him.”

Castiel furrows his brows, a bit puzzled by her choice of words, but before he's able to ask Dean leans forward and, after some encouragement by Eileen, wonders, “Why did you turn my brother down?”

Castiel finds himself speechless all of a sudden, just staring at those piercing pairs of eyes looking back at him.

“It's just … I've been here, all these weeks,” Dean continues. “You probably totally forgot that I even existed, but damn, I've seen it all. And I know you like that idiot. When he told me that he wanted to ask you out, I was so sure you would say yes.” He halts, sighing. “But then you didn't. And my brother was frigging devastated.”

Castiel always wondered how it would feel like to have his heart ripped out his chest.

Now he knows.

“I'm – I'm so sorry –”

“We didn't come here to accuse you,” Eileen is quick to add after glaring at Dean, most likely for his choice of words. “And we didn't come here to convince you to change your mind or something. We're fairly sure you had your reasons for saying no and we respect that. We don't wanna push you into anything you might regret only because you feel bad.”

“Yeah, right,” Dean agrees. “Sorry for making you think that. I seriously didn't wanna blame you or something. It's your decision after all.” He shuts his eyes for a moment, obviously collecting his thoughts. “But, you know, my idiot of a brother … he's got some bad experiences in the past and asking you out was a big step for him. And now he's telling himself that this all has been in his head. That he wanted it so bad he imagined you liking him. He's beating himself up over that and I just …”

“You care about him, that's fairly obvious,” Eileen cuts in, appearing like a woman who knows exactly what love looks like.

And Castiel flushes because this is Sam's fiancée after all.

“Please just tell him that,” Eileen pleads. “You don't have to take him up on his offer or even date him, but right now he thinks he made the whole thing up in his mind and I can't have seeing him that miserable. I kinda love him, you know?”

Yes, Castiel knows quite well.

And he's actually really grateful for that. Eileen seems to care about Sam's well-being a great deal. He deserves someone so special in his life.

“I … I don't want him to feel bad,” Castiel eventually says. “I'm really sorry. I didn't mean –”

“We know,” Dean interrupts, a soft smile on his lips. “Misunderstandings like that happen all the time. Deep down he probably knows that as well. He'd probably get over himself soon enough and realize that you like him just fine, but well, it's actually a time for celebration right now and I wanna see him happy again.”

Castiel nods. “I understand. I never meant to dampen your wedding mood.”

Eileen shrugs, smirking. “It's quite alright. You're cute. I can see why Dean took a shot asking you out on a date. I'd probably done the same.”

Dean snorts next to her. “Thank you, love.”

She pats his broad chest. “You're still my number one.”

Dean looks at her in way Castiel can only call besotted and he grows very bewildered very fast.

“I … I don't understand,” he stutters, glancing back and forth between them. Just now he notices that they're fingers are linked, probably since the moment they approached Castiel at the counter.

“What is it?” Eileen wonders.

“Jo …” Castiel's head is spinning. “She … she told me that you and Sam are getting married.”

Eileen nods. “And that's right.”

“So why …?” He looks at their joined hands and the way they standing far too close to each other and his confusion grows stronger and stronger.

He's totally missing something here.

Something fundamental.

And suddenly Eileen's eyes widen in realization. “Oh my God!” she exclaims. “I know that look!”

Dean flinches at her sudden outburst and stares at her in confusion. “What do you mean? What's happening?”

Just a moment later he receives a rather hard slap on his shoulder by Eileen. “Those stupid wristbands!” she says accusingly, pointing at the leather bracelet. “You're confusing people again.”

Dean wrinkles his giant forehead. “What?”

“Remember the first time we met?” Eileen asks. “And our date more or less right after that? The whole night I believed your name to be DEAN!”

Dean still seems highly puzzled by the events. “What does that have to do –?”

“I probably looked the same way Castiel is doing right now!” Eileen interrupts. “Super confused when you eventually told me stories about your brother Dean!”

Castiel is officially lost now. He has not a single clue what's going on.

“I don't understand …” he says once again, his voice shy now. He feels a headache coming his way as he attempts to entangle this cluster of confusing new information.

Dean, however, does finally seem able to catch on. His jaw goes slack as he looks at Eileen in shock.

“Oh no,” he whispers, shaking his head as if he can't believe it. “You're not saying …?”

Eileen nods determinedly. “I think so.”

Dean still doesn't appear convinced. He abruptly turns toward Castiel and asks urgently, “You do know that I am Sam, right?”

What?

“What?”

Castiel merely gapes, even incapable of blinking.

Now he's absolutely certain that he misheard.

Meanwhile, Eileen slams her palm onto the counter, making several of the patrons close by flinch in surprise, and bellows triumphantly, “I knew it!”

Dean – or Sam? – groans as he rubs his face. “Seriously? I can't believe that. All that moping and pining – for nothing?”

Castiel glances back and forth between them as they switch back to sign language, moving their hands way too fast for Castiel's limited skills he got himself in a ASL class years ago to understand. It's clear, however, that Eileen isn't happy with Sam's phrasing and wants to give him a piece of her mind.

And damn, is his name seriously Sam?

So does that mean …?

“Okay, what is going on?” Castiel cuts into their domestic dispute. “Can please someone explain?”

Eileen's expression is full of sympathy as she looks back at him. “It's actually a sweet story.”

And then she nudges the man beside her to continue.

Sam clears his throat – and God, his name is honestly Sam, right? – and raises his left arm so that the wristband is visible. “That's a gift from our friend Bobby. He's like a father to us since our own dad … well, he wasn't exactly a role model, y'know?” He halts briefly, making it obvious that this is still an emotional subject for him. “I don't remember exactly when Bobby gave it to us, to be honest. I think I was around fourteen at the time. I recall having a tough time in school back then, it wasn't really easy for a gangly teenager like me. And when Bobby gave us those bracelets on Christmas Day … well, Dean proposed to switch them. So I'd carry his name and he mine. And everytime someone would bother me, I'd have something to remind me that my big brother was with me.”

Well, Castiel has to agree with Eileen, this is definitely a very sweet story.

“There aren't any bullies annoying me anymore, but somehow I still kept Dean's name with me,” Sam explains. “And Dean never suggested to switch them back at some point in the past either. So it stayed that way.”

Castiel needs a moment to wrap his head around this new information. It sounds way too good to be true and for a second he wonders whether his mind is playing some tricks.

“But … I called you 'Dean' several times,” Castiel remembers eventually. “And your brother … if I was using the wrong names, why didn't you correct me right away?”

Sam looks sheepish. “We're just used to it, y'know? Friends and family and whatnot – they still think it hilarious to use the wrong names occasionally. Dean and I stopped going with it a long time ago. And somewhere along the way we kinda got used to react to both names.”

At first Castiel wants to argue that this doesn't explain why his brother obviously didn't figure it necessary to introduce himself properly to a stranger nonetheless, but then he brings their first meeting back to mind. How Castiel called him 'Sam' after spotting the wristband and how this gorgeous, stunning man said something in return which Castiel absolutely missed because he's been so blinded by the dazzling smile that his whole system shut down.

Obviously he'd been so dumbstruck he completely forgot to listen.

“So that means you are …?”

“Sam Winchester,” he answers with a wide grin. “Happiest man alive because he's engaged to this beautiful woman next to me!”

He drops a soft kiss onto Eileen's cheek which makes her chuckle and blush a little bit.

For an instant Castiel can't help thinking that they're most likely the cutest couple he's ever seen and he finds himself smiling warmly at their open affection, but just a moment later he recalls the urgent issue at hand.

“So your brother …?”

“Dean Winchester!” Sam practically beams now, sounding overly excited. “Totally single and really crazy about this guy who opened a bakery around the corner from where we live.”

Castiel feels heat crawling up his neck as both Sam and Eileen stare at him gleefully. “So the other day … when he asked me to that festival,” Castiel bites his bottom lips as everything slowly starts to fit together, “... he was asking me out? On a date?”

Sam and Eileen nod in unison.

“And I rejected him,” Castiel realizes. His heart drops as he recalls Dean's deeply disappointed face after Castiel declined his offer.

“And now I get why,” Sam says. “Knowing my brother he probably didn't use the word 'date' directly, am I right? I guess you thought he meant some kind of buddy night or whatever. And I can see how that didn't really appeal to you considering … well, considering they way you two always look at each other.”

He sounds teasing now. Fond.

And Castiel downright ignores it when he urges, “Where is Dean now?”

It feels right saying the name. As if a floodgate opened up and showed him a whole new world behind it.

And it fits so much better than 'Sam'. Castiel always kind of thought that, but he never understood why.

Now he wonders whether his subconsciousness somehow knew the whole time that something was wrong.

“Dean's outside,” Sam jerks him out of his thoughts. “Waiting in the car.”

Castiel instantly rushes towards the door, but as he pushes it open he finds himself halting for a moment and announcing, “Congratulations on the engagement, by the way!”, before he continues in his mission, followed by Sam and Eileen's happy laughter.

Castiel spots the black Impala on the next parking lot right away. Dean told him so much about the car before that he probably would have been able to recognize it anywhere.

Castiel hastens over and notices Dean sitting behind the wheel, checking something on his phone and being completely oblivious to his surroundings. When Castiel knocks impatiently against the window, he startles hard and almost drops the device in his hands.

“Cas?” Dean asks, his voice muffled through the closed door. He stares at the man in utter surprise and for a minute even seems to forget that he's supposed to react somehow. Eventually though he remembers to open the door and climbs out of the car, his gaze never leaving Castiel.

“Your name is Dean!” Castiel blurts right into his face, feeling like a clumsy oaf but not giving a damn.

Because here he is – gorgeous, wonderful Dean – and Castiel can't help beaming at him, probably looking like a lunatic in the process.

Dean blinks a few times, clearly dumbstruck. “Um … yes?”

“Your. Name. is. Dean.” Castiel emphasizes every single word, sensing an elation running through his body he never felt before.

“Um, you're okay, Cas?” Dean asks, obviously concerned that Castiel lost his mind somewhere along the way. He even squeezes Castiel's wrist gently and studies him from top to bottom as though looking for clues for the other man's seemingly irrational behavior.

“I'm fine,” Castiel promises, grinning brightly. “I'm more than fine.”

Dean instinctively steps back a bit, most likely somewhat intimidated by Castiel's toothy grimace. “Uh … that's great?”

“Can I kiss you?” Castiel finds himself asking all of a sudden. He's fairly surprised by his own boldness, but can't bring himself to regret it.

Especially when he witnesses Dean's cheeks turning beet red immediately. “W-what?”

Castiel takes Dean's hand and brushes over that damned wristband which caused so much confusion. “I thought your name is Sam.”

Dean stares at him for a moment, apparently unsure what to say or what even to think about this weird situation. In the end he goes with, “What?”

“I've read the name on the bracelet,” Castiel explains. “And I assumed it's your name.”

Dean's eyes widen as he tries to wrap his mind around the other man's words. “But … but I told you then,” he counters. “That first time we met. You – you called me 'Sam' and I corrected you. Remember?”

Castiel chuckles softly. “No,” he confesses. “After you smiled at me, my brain stopped working. I can't recall anything you said.”

Dean hesitates. “Really?”

There is a small speck of hope glimmering in his eyes and it's the most beautiful thing.

“You have quite the effect on me, Dean,” Castiel admits. “Something like that never happened to me before. But you … you seem to be the exception.”

Dean still seems to have some trouble handling the situation. “So … so every time you called me 'Sam', you weren't actually joking?”

Castiel shakes his head. “No, I wasn't.”

Dean huffs a breathy laugh. “Well, I've gotta say, I really found it a bit strange after the fifth time, but –” He licks his lips anxiously. “So when you heard about the engagement …?”

Castiel nods. “I thought you were the one getting married,” he confirms. “I was seriously crushed when Jo told me about that.”

“You were, huh?”

“I mean, of course I was also happy for you or at least trying to be,” he continues, realizing he's babbling now, but unable to stop it. “Because you deserve all the happiness in the world and Jo told me that you and Eileen are the cutest couple. I mean, that Sam and Eileen are the cutest couple –”

Dean still seems to be a bit overwhelmed by the whole thing, but he chuckles anyway. “They are kinda gross.”

“And when you asked me to that festival … well, I figured you wanted to be friends,” Castiel rambles on. “Just friends. And I don't want to your friend.” He flinches instantly as he notices how that sounds. “I mean, of course I want to be your friend. Friendship is the most important basis for any kind of valuable relationship. But … at that point I merely had to get used to the idea of you being a soon-to-be-married man –“ He sighs. “It would have been too much to go to this festival with you, knowing there would be nothing else between us. Nothing else than friendship. So I said 'no' to protect my own, stupid heart. But I had no idea it would hurt you like that, I never meant –”

“It's okay,” Dean cuts in. “I guess … I see the bigger picture now.” He shakes his head in disbelief. “Damn, Sammy told me the same thing happened with Eileen back then. Maybe we should really get rid off those dumb things, they're nothing but trouble.”

He glares at the wristband accusingly.

Castiel, however, lays his hand above it. “Please don't,” he says warmly. “It's a very sweet gesture.”

Dean smiles in response, his features so soft that Castiel can't help tracing them tenderly with his finger. Once again he seriously astounded by his own forwardness, but Dean leans into the touch straightaway, as if this is everything he has been waiting for.

And maybe it kinda is.

“You didn't answer my question,” Castiel whispers.

Dean's lips curl upwards. “The one about the kiss?”

“Yes.”

Instead of answering Dean's arms suddenly wrap around Castiel's waist and pull the other man closer. Castiel merely has time to make a sound that's part surprise and part approval before pliant lips cover his own and he finds himself in a world of bliss.

Castiel never knew that a kiss could feel this way. Dean's touch is soft and unhurried, yet so full of emotions. Castiel's toe curl inwards as he gives back as good as he's got and hopes that this would never end.

But of course eventually they have to pull back to get some air, though they don't go very far. Their noses are still touching and Castiel revels in the sight of Dean so radiant with joy.

“So …” Castiel chews his lower lip, feeling extremely pleased when Dean's eyes follow the motion with interest. “I guess that festival was a one weekend thing, right? But how about something else? A nice movie, some dinner?”

“Yes!” Dean agrees immediately. “Sometime soon.”

“Tonight?”

Dean chuckles amused. “It's gonna be torture to wait that long, but I'll have to manage somehow.”

Castiel can't do anything else but kiss the beautiful smile once more.

“Sorry for being so stupid,” he mumbles against Dean's skin. “I just should have listened.” He shakes his head in the face of his own foolishness. “I'm usually such a good listener. But you … you just make me –”

He groans in frustration and presses his forehead against Dean's temple. “I'm really sorry.”

Dean drags him closer. “I get it, Cas. I'm just so adorable I'm frying brains left and right.” He laughs quietly, his whole body shaking. “Though I'm really glad you listened now.”

“Me too,” Castiel agrees. “And you have Eileen to thank for that.”

Dean makes a humming noise. “That woman is way too good for my brother. He's one lucky bastard.”

Castiel nods. “He is.”

Dean keeps silent for a while after that, his fingers gently brushing over Castiel's spine and making him shiver in the process. It's easy, quiet and it feels so comfortable that Castiel barely knows what to do with himself. Something like that never happened to him before.

“But you know what?” Dean eventually picks up his voice again.

“What?”

Dean grins brightly. “I'm starting to think that I'm one lucky bastard myself now.”

Something warm presses within Castiel's chest as he smiles harder than he ever smiled before in his life. “I told you that weeks ago.”

Dean just laughs. “Yeah, you did. If you want you can tell me that every single day from now on.”

It sounds like a promise for a beautiful future, a future filled with happiness and so much potential, and Castiel simply nods and buries his face in Dean's neck, almost overwhelmed by all these feelings.

It seems wonderful and terrifying at the same time.

And Castiel can't wait to have it all.

#destiel #destielfanficnet #destiel drabble #fic #fluff #au #au: fic #light angst #misunderstandings #mistaken identity #saileen #first kiss #fanfiction: mine

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elenathehun · 7 years ago

Text

reading is emotional, part 13

So I read volumes 11, 12, and 13 several months ago, at the end of September, and then real life basically interrupted any attempt to write a reactions summary. So in lieu of that, I'll just pull my initial impressions from a Naruto group chat I participate in:

Jiraiya's intro is horrible - why is he a fan fave again? - but it also overpowers the most important thing in that scene: a foreign seal had been placed on top of Minato's work and was interfering with the original. I mean, wow, so many stories should come from just that. What haven't I seen this utilized by fandom more often? Orochimaru had access to Naruto as a baby, for one.

[One chat member points out that Orochimaru placed his seal on Naruto during the chuunin exam] When did he have time to do that? [another chat member points out that Orochimaru hit Naruto in the stomach to get him out of the way] Is that all it takes to apply a seal? Dammit, that's lame.

Anyway, is it just me, or does it seem pretty clear that Jiraiya was basically MIA in part 1? It doesn't seem as though Sarutobi knew where he was, given that jounin were supposed to report seeing him to command...

Meanwhile, an unstable jinchuuriki is just killing people all over the place - and our one sacrificial jounin is tasked with watching him. Dammit, I forgot how annoying this arc is. There is no chain of command in Konoha. No one seems to know what anyone is doing, ever.

[Chat member asks how Konoha has not fallen apart with no chain of command] I honestly assume ROOT has an actual purpose aside from fluffing Danzo's ego, and that is acting like an actual military. But seriously, nothing about how Konoha is portrayed makes a lick of sense. There should have been teams set to just watching the sand nin, especially Gaara. Jiraiya should have immediately reported for duty to Sarutobi.

Also, it's sort of horrifying how bad a teacher Jiraiya is. I mean, Kakashi is a bad teacher, but at least he never claimed to be good at it. [chat member asks if I'm at the point where Jiraiya throws Naruto off a cliff] Right now he's just trying to help a 12-year-old boy with shit control over his own chakra learn to use demonic chakra instead. In a lot of ways, Jiraiya is actually worse as a teacher, because it's clear that he's able to accurately assess Naruto's weaknesses as a shinobi. He's just uninterested in helping him get better at using his own chakra and not the fox's. I guess I'll have to re-read the early part 2 section, but aside from summoning and the Rasengan, what the hell did Jiraiya ever actually teach Naruto?

Anyway, in the next scene, we get an up-close and personal look at how incompetent Sarutobi was. All these jounin look pretty worried, and for good reason! One of their number is dead, and the Hokage is saying they're going to wait and see. This is a massive disaster in leadership.

Anyway, cut back to the hospital, where Sakura and Ino only show up to play spectator to Lee. It's infuriating. Why even bother having female characters, Kishimoto? I would have found it less insulting if he'd just decided to portray a totally gender-segregated society.

Anyway, I do appreciate that relationship we see between Sarutobi and Anko. I think it's clear that whatever his failures as a leader in the present, he was quite charismatic previously. But god, new leadership is absolutely necessary from a military POV.

...and Jiraiya threw Naruto off a cliff. I think it's safe to say that Tsunade was clearly the best teacher out of the lot of them.

Baki travels back and forth between Sand and Leaf with no chaperone. Because that makes total sense.

And Temari makes the same argument against war and for peace now that kid!Tobirama did 600 chapters later. It's a shame she didn't become Kazekage, but her vagina disqualifies her. [Chat members begin discussing the viability of a Kazekage Temari AU] If Sand's Kages all come from the same family, why the hell would you choose the nutty, psychopathic 12-year-old over his far more stable siblings? I understand it's not a democracy, but there's still an element of choice here. [the chat then considered Kazekage Kankurou] Kankurou's too sensible. Only nutcases become Kage - if half the men in your family had died on the job, you might pass too.

[chat member asks why Jiraiya is so keen on using the fox's chakra when everyone else is adamantly against it] He's an irresponsible weirdo in-universe. Given what we know in part 1, it was staggeringly incompetent: the only other example we see of demonic power is a boy who has killed about a half-dozen people on-screen. The real reason, of course, is that Kishimoto didn't want to do the hard work of developing Naruto's abilities organically, so the unearned superpower it is.

[Same chat member asks how I feel about Sasuke so far] He's not dumb. He actually has a survival instinct of a sort. And call me crazy, but there are a lot of Sasuke = Tsunade parallels there. He's lost literally everything, and there is a deep skepticism of Leaf propaganda that Naruto and Sakura haven't developed yet, and maybe never will. Like Tsunade, he is the scion of a founding clan - the very definition of the insider. That that hasn't saved either of them from tragedy and loss.

Anyway, reading the Neji/Naruto fight was actually the worst because I don't like Neji at all, but Naruto doesn't really deserve to win. Why couldn't Sakura beat Ino in the prelims and then go on to fight Neji? Anyway, I can skim a lot because Kishimoto's fight art isn't very dynamic.

O hai, Kabuto is still at large, still killing ANBU mooks. I definitely have to write the story where Team 7 gets involved with Kakashi's investigation of the mysterious traitor instead of participating in the chuunin exam.

anyway, Naruto shows he has a bit of a brain during Neji's fight. It's a shame this only happens every so often when dictated by the plot, instead of growing organically as part of his character.

What is the point of the Hyuuga? I mean, they have that nifty seal, you'd think the village council would really pressure the main house to ensure the branch members were able to use the entirety of the gentle fist skillset. If I were Danzo, I'd be maneuvering in that direction: hundreds of sealed Hyuuga with the full power of the gentle fist would really augment Leaf's manpower. I can understand the main house keeping the branch house down with superior knowledge of the gentle fist; I can see the main house using the seal to quash rebellion in the branch house; I can't see both, not in a world where the Hyuuga are part of Leaf and have a manpower requisition of some kind they need to fill. Leaf needs soldiers, and deliberately handicapping the ones who serve the village...yeah, if I were Danzo, I would force the issue.

OK, more of Kabuto just wandering around the stands, randomly healing Hinata.

Anyway, time for Neji's monologue. Mostly what I got from this is that Neji actually has no idea what really happened. Apparently, Cloud's Kage came directly to Leaf for the peace treaty, and Hiashi is strong enough to kill a Kage-level opponent. This doesn't even count the fact that the Kage of Cloud is actually in the stands right as Neji is telling Naruto his tragic story. Given that Neji was about 4 when his father dies, that makes sense - he probably cobbled his story together from household gossip.

Anyway, what I got from this is that Gai should have ensured that Neji got the crap beat out of him at least once by a social inferior. This is not the sort of lesson you want occurring during an international event open to the public, and honestly, Neji's overconfidence could have gotten him killed very easily - and not just by his opponents. Talking about Konoha's internal politics in front of outsiders is the sort of thing that involves the secret police...

Anyway, Naruto uses dangerous demonic power to beat up a 14-year-old boy. Jiraiya did not clear his training plan with Sarutobi ahead of time, looking at the unhappy surprise on Sarutobi's face. Also confirmed: the Byakugan can see demonic chakra that is invisible to the regular human eye. Would have been nice to have multiple Hyuuga guards on Gaara, right?

Ugh this Hyuuga bullshit is infuriating. I'm tabling it for another day until I can finish editing my Hyuuga rant post.

Moving on, Raidou's little "shinobi must be punctual" speech makes me think the blatant favoritism we see in canon wasn't appreciated by the Joe Schmoes around Sasuke. Kakashi can do that crap because he's basically been active a million years and is good for it in the clutch, and his co-workers still hate it! Sasuke doesn't have that leeway.

Ah, Shikamaru: one of Naruto's many out-and-out chauvinists.

Anyway, it's pretty annoying that the matches have been set for a month, but not one of these dumb children bothered to do research on their opponents.

Kishimoto again devolves to show, not tell: Shikamaru is apparently the reason the rather weak Team 10 survived the Forest of Death, although how he did so is never explained. It would have been nice to see it, you know?

Oh, that's right. Shikamaru is a genius, who apparently never does shit unless dictated by the plot. So in real life, he'd be like one of those weird child prodigies who end up hermits in Montana, but this is Naruto, that ain't going to happen here.

The group chat had pretty divergent opinions on the tunnel Shikamaru was using to spread his shadow. For the record, I thought it was a pretty amazing asspull, but that's been my feeling the entire time I've been suffering through this arc, so go figure. I'm still sort of salty about how Shikamaru went from "maladjusted fuckup" to "GENIUS" in the space of one freaking battle. Every time Kishimoto talks about the "ideal chuunin psycho profile", I get an eye tic. In what universe is Shikamaru commander material at this point in canon?

OK, time for Kakashi's dramatic entrance, which is very dramatic.

@hiruma-musouka proposed a while back that Kakashi is a fundamentally avoidant personality, and I can't stop thinking about canon in light of that. So an alternate reading of Kakashi's tardiness for Sasuke's match - Kakashi was actually hoping Sasuke's match would be forfeited due to tardiness, and Sarutobi's weak will foiled his cunning plan!

Gaara casually kills two mooks in plain sight. Where is Leaf's internal security? The only thing I can reconcile is that the Uchiha did all internal security, and given their deaths and the fact that Leaf still seems to be a largely pre-literate society, no group managed to fill the vacuum afterward.

How has Sasuke gotten so much better in a month of training? I don't care if your fancy eyes allow you to mimic moves and see very fast movement, you still need to build up the muscle to actually go fast yourself!

A moment of silence for the people of Sand, who are so familiar with the Ichibi they can tell right away when Gaara lets it possess him totally.

Those panels where Sarutobi and the "Kazekage" are looking at each other are actually pretty good. Ramps up the tension.

The invasion starts, and there is absolutely no coordinated response from the Leaf-nin.

Anyway, Shikamaru pretending to sleep through the invasion of his village is a massive black mark on his record. Like, God save the Nara clan level of black mark. He's technically an adult, he's the heir, he ought to be representing his clan...him trying to sleep through an invasion is a mark of cowardice, and would have terrible repercussions on his family. This is, in fact, the sort of thing that starts complicated succession disputes.

...and we end on Sarutobi, ready to fight all the time.

Anyway, reading this part of the manga sort of solidified why Naruto is a bad character for me, from a writer/author POV. Naruto spends so much time talking about how he understands the villain's pain. The problem is, Naruto's tragic life history never really shows up as a tangible issue in the plot! He's a lonely kid, but good lord, everyone in Leaf is lonely. People are jerks to him in a general way because he's an orphan and poor and stupid, which sucks but happens a lot in real life too. And even though people are jerks to him, we never really see them be cruel to him because he's got a demon in him. Iruka treats him like a wayward student; Sakura is basically his friend in a few months; Kakashi is a sadsack teacher, but he's not singling Naruto out with his awful teaching, and he does trie to find someone competent to instruct him; Sasuke isn't nice to him, but he's no crueler than the rest of Naruto's classmates. Basically, when Naruto talks about how he feels the villain's pain, I'm very meh. Contrast this to the chick version of Naruto, where lots of little girls beat the shit out of each other in the name of friendship: Nanoha. Fate Testarossa is a deeply tragic figure, and you are really, really, rooting for her to move to a better place by the end of that show. Or geez, just the first two episodes of Michiko and Hatchin, which features some truly awful child abuse.

Anyway, I'll post my long-awaited (?) Hyuuga rant later this week, and then I guess it's back to the old grindstone to try and knock out a reread of Naruto volume 14-16 before the new year begins!

#naruto #reading is emotional #fuck you kishimoto

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vitanteactawrites · 7 years ago

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Sometimes two isn’t enough, part II

Fandom: Supernatural / AU

Characters: Reader, Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester

Pairing: Dean x Reader x Sam [no incest]

Word Count: 1785

Part: 2 [part one can be found here]

Warnings: Restraint

Author’s note: Hey everyone! I ended up posting a day sooner then planned. Unfortunately part III is going to be a bit late next week because I’ve got company flying in. I hope you enjoy and I look forward to posting next week x

The world feels groggy and heavy - like a mist that blankets the ground on an early morning, things are unclear. It that irritating pain in your neck that seems to resinate first, and as you roll your head forward from it’s place lulled against your shoulder, you grimace. Eyes open hesitantly, and after blinking a few times, you take in the space around you. It has a distinct dingy smell to it - which seems to perfectly match with the slightly curling wallpaper in the corner of the room and the hideously floral printed sheets that adorn the bed. They’re too bright and too contrasting to the rest of the room, making it appear more out of place and grotesque then required.

There is a small kitchen - the backsplash has tiles that rotate between off-white and some sort of pattern you can’t seem to make out from the distance you are away from them. There is a set of mirrors against a wall - one’s you distinguish lead to the closet - and the off you the first view of yourself. The sight is cringe worthy - you’re incredibly pale, so much so that some might deem you sickly, and the dark shadows under your eyes make it worse. Tearing your gaze away, you find the space has two more doors. The first leads to a bathroom - that much is obvious by the soft pattering of water and distinct movement coming from the space. The other has a small shaft of light creeping beneath it, showing off an obvious gap in the floor and making you away that the door will lead you outside to freedom. But rather then get up right away, your eyes move to the pressure on your wrists. The ropes immediately catch your attention, but its the skin beneath it - slightly raw but obviously healing - that make you pause. They aren’t tight enough to have caused such a thing, meaning they’re newly tied and whoever put you there didn’t want to inflict pain. Remove them. The thought is startling, but draws your attention back to the ropes and with clenched fists and enough steady concentration, they fall away, crumbling to dust before even hitting the floor. You blink twice at the sight as a bubble of worry forms in your stomach. Though your memory seems to be evading you, you realize that such an action isn’t normal.

As you move to get to your feet, you realize how terribly your body aches. It would be wise to leave - to get out the door and run far, far away because being tied to a chair can’t be good. But with a second glance toward a bed, your feet are carrying you away and within moments you’re drawing back the sheets to bury yourself in them. They smell like you assume heaven or warmth would, and you take no time to pull the covers over your head, a soft hum of content falling past your lips as you bury your nose into the nearest pillow. The scent along is enough to cradle you back to sleep, your body curling comfortably into the bed as your breathing evens out and your eyes flutter shut.

____ ____ ____ ____ ____ ____ ____ ____ ____ ____ ____

“Sam!” The sheer panic in the tone causes your eyes to snap open and brows to furrow. Whatever sleep you might have gotten is quickly swept away by the voice, and with slight hesitation, you pull the covers down to peep out to see who it was. A captor maybe? Rescuer? You could be Sam, couldn’t you? The movement seems to start both men, who look at you both bewildered and relieved. You find your lower lip being drawn between your teeth, brow furrowing slightly. “Hello.”

____ ____ ____ ____ ____ ____ ____ ____ ____ ____ ____

After a few muttered words beneath breath and an exchange of looks, the two men are quick to get you out of the bed. You’re hesitant, and that seems to draw the attention of the one with wet hair, who looks at you rather perplexed as you drag a blanket with you over to the small table near the kitchen. Wringing your hands nervously in your lap, your eyes take in the tabletop. Much like the rest of the room, it’s off and doesn’t seem to match anything.

“Y/N.”

When there is no immediate answer to the prompt, your eyes dart up with a hint of skepticism splashing across your features. “Who?”

There is once again a look passed between the two men, something that is beginning to border upon irritating. It’s clear they know you, which means they must know what’s going on and why you can’t remember anything.

“What do you remember?”

Shouldn’t I be asking that? You think, brow furrowing slightly. And despite being moderately more awake and aware of your surroundings, trying to remember anything before waking up the first time turns up a blank, so shoulders raise into a small shrug.

“I woke up tied to a chair.” You reply deadpan, earning a sheepish look from the man with wet hair. He runs a hand nervously up the back of his neck, his own gaze falling to the table and a soft blush beginning to trail up his cheeks as the other glances at him with a raised brow.

“I didn’t want you to wake up and not realize where you were... Figured it was better safe then sorry.”

Offering a soft humpf in response, your nose crinkles. “Despite being tired to said chair, I knew I could get away. But once I was free.. I knew I shouldn’t.” Waving a hand at the room in general, you continue, “this isn’t home. It has no sense of familiarity, but there’s a scent hidden beneath the... dinginess. It’s.. how you’d assume warmth would smell if it were picked up as a difference sense. It’s why I’m still here. Such a thing couldn’t possibly be bad.”

The silence that follows your explanation is a long one, and while each man looks at you with a similar expression, there is a distinction in both - an emotion - that makes you shift uncomfortably within your seat. “Do - do you know who I am?”

“You’re-” There is hesitation in the word, and after a moment the other man takes over. “Y/N. That’s your name, and according to the Devil, you’re our - one of our - soulmates.”

“Sam.”

“It isn’t as if there’s an easy way to break it to her Dean.”

There they were - the names you’d been searching for. Y/N. Sam. Dean. Much easier forms of identification then relying on distinguishing them on looks alone. But despite only interacting with them for a short time, it’s clear they’re easily told apart; Dean’s hands seem to twitch - as if itching to hold something - though you weren’t sure what. His eyes seemed harder, the emotion buried far more deeply, as if hidden behind years of emotion. Sam on the other hand, seemed to wear his heart on his sleeve, emotion clear in his eyes - but it was clear he had just as many walls as Dean. Less obvious and much more hidden.

“You’re not human either.”

“SAM.”

“I gathered that much,” you interrupted. You needed information and having the two argue would do you know good, and despite this realization it came as more of a shock to acknowledge that such explanation hadn’t been why you’d stopped them from arguing. Yet once again, the reasoning seemed to evade you. Regardless, the words were enough for both men to pause and look at you.

“The ropes,” you explained, “I willed them away and they... well, they disintegrated.”

Eyebrows rose into his hairline as a soft, bewildered chuckle fell from Sam’s lips.

“That’s why I didn’t find anything.” Dean muttered, his tone mirroring the laugh that had just left Sam.

The three of you sit in a more comfortable silence for a moment before your quest for information gets the better of you.

“Why were you speaking with the Devil?”

____ ____ ____ ____ ____ ____ ____ ____ ____ ____ ____

It seemed whenever they tried to offer a short answer - it lacked something they later deemed important. And by the middle of their speech, the pieces were beginning to fall into place. The two were brothers from a family of Hunters - not the regular sort, but those that went after anything that went bump in the night. Monsters. Such a statement alone was enough for your to cringe, eyes flickering down guiltily toward your hands. Undoubtedly you classified as such. Cross referencing a few stories to your experience of vaporizing the ropes had to make you bad. Make you hunted. But your reaction was easily spotted - their eyes had hardly left you since they’d found you in one of their beds - and the two practically tripped and scrambled to back track - their apologies rushed and mildly amusing. Only once they were certain you knew you weren’t a target on theirs - or anyone else's - list did they continue.

They were destined to stop Lucifer and the apocalypse. To save the world. And when Lucifer had appeared, he’d dragged you forward as a threat to hang over their heads - to stop them. You’d felt a mild twinge of guilt over the possibility that they might not stop Lucifer or save the world, but it was quickly washed away by butterflies in your stomach. The mere thought and idea of love had been enough that they’d both been willing to throw away their one shot on happiness and love. It had made you blush and lower your eyes, a reaction you were certain they’d both caught.

Once their explanation was done, you’d all fallen into silence. Your eyes rose to trace them as they moved around the room. Dean flopped back into the seat across from you, busying himself cleaning a gun - the rhythm of the movement seeming to help his jittery hands. Sam placed a warm mug before you, as well as a sandwich. Taking both gratefully, you offered him a smile. He beamed in return.

“What do we do now?”

Though there was initial worry in voicing the question, the fear is squashed almost immediately.

“Try to figure this thing out I suppose. Make our way back to the bunker, solve any cases that pop up on the way... Once we’re somewhere safe we can call in Cass and see if he knows anything about you and why Lucifer might have had you.”

#supernatural fanfiction #dean winchester fanfiction #sam winchester fanfiction #dean x reader x sam #dean winchester x reader #sam winchester x reader #dean winchester x reader x sam winchester

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wildscapescheats-blog · 5 years ago

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francescaswords · 6 years ago

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Chapter Three | The Princess and the Dragon and Other Stories About Unlikely Heroes

Prologue / Chapter One / Chapter Two

Read Chapter Four (and the rest) on my Patreon

The next morning, the High Council assembled around a huge olive wood table in the Great Hall, tucking into jugs of iced coffee, stacks of fresh croissants and plates of fruit. King Emmanuel’s specialty was breakfast; unlike most teenagers, Amelia had great enthusiasm for getting out of bed.

After Amelia’s great-great-times-something grandparents won their war, the Crown rescinded absolute power to a publicly elected High Council of eleven people plus the monarchs—or ten people, if there was only one reigning monarch. An uneven total of councillors ensured there was always a tiebreaker… and someone to referee impromptu football matches. The citizens of the Kingdom of Mirrors lived, peacefully, for generations… until the Sapphire Dragon arrived and the fairytale ended. At present the High Council had four members, only three of whom held Amelia’s respect. The other eight members travelled south to slay the dragon the previous year and were now incapable of leaving either their hospital bed or their coffin. The kingdom hadn’t held elections to replace them yet, because they were running out of suitable candidates; some muttered that Prince Nicholas should be bullied into returning to royal life. Still, Amelia called them to the richly decorated hall because she felt the occasion warranted pomp and circumstance. Her parents sat in the spare chairs, watching their daughter carefully.

Most of the morning’s pomp and circumstance was supplied by Lord Donald Fitzpatrick, who earned his title by saving a young Prince Nicholas from drowning in the harbour on a day out. In the seventeen years since then, Lord Donald had done little else to distinguish himself except wear spectacularly expensive clothes, which he purchased from the Valley of Dreams with sales of a book written about the twenty seconds he spent hauling three-year-old Nicholas out of about two metres of water. Amelia would never understand how he had been elected four times without ever venturing to the south coast to help slay the dragon.

‘Thank you for coming,’ Amelia began when they were all assembled. Next to Lord Donald sat Baroness Theodora Rosewater, a businesswoman elected to the council after years of running the most successful fishery in the kingdom, employing six hundred people. These days she oversaw the entire kingdom’s fleet of fishing boats. Next to her, sipping glasses of orange juice, sat twin sisters, Ladies Elisa and Beth Montague. They had inherited an ailing olive grove forty years previously and within a decade they trebled olive oil production, invented a new type of olive press and married, then buried, a total of four husbands between them. Amelia could never remember if Elisa had three husbands and Beth one, or the other way around. Amelia took a deep breath. ‘We have a new plan to slay the dragon.’

She outlined her idea, and when she was finished her parents nodded encouragingly. The twins looked faintly impressed and Baroness Theodora was tapping the hilt of her butter knife against the table thoughtfully. Only Lord Donald appeared uninterested.

‘Your Majesty, apologies for not understanding…’ he did not sound particularly sorry. ‘But surely it is too dangerous to take simple musicians into the war zone?’

‘Well, my lord, we’ve tried slaying the dragon the traditional way.’ Amelia deliberately slowed her speech. ‘Or some of us have, anyway. Clearly it has not worked. So we are embarking on a new strategy, employing the wonderful skills of regular townsfolk. Who will of course be trained in self-defence. And heavily guarded. As we can’t bully the Sapphire Dragon into leaving our lands, we will persuade him to go using more peaceful means.’

‘I don’t understand.’

‘I know you don’t.’ Amelia’s mother coughed into her serviette. ‘I know you don’t understand yet,’ Amelia corrected, ‘but you will. You might want to take notes, my lord, because I have quite a detailed plan…’

Explaining plans, it turned out, was quite boring. Over the next few weeks, Amelia went through her idea with every council member at least twice, then got the kingdom security services involved. Eventually, after weak points were highlighted and second opinions asked for, back up plans formed and every potential situation analysed with surgical precision, the council voted anonymously on Amelia’s plan. It passed; three votes to one. Amelia smiled tightly at Lord Donald and asked him to have signs drawn up:

‘TWENTIETH ANNIVERSARY WAR RELIEF GAMES AND FESTIVAL STAFF WANTED.

Are you a chef, baker or greengrocer? Are you a skilled plumber, carpenter, blacksmith, surveyor or architect? Visit the Royal Castle immediately. YOUR SKILLS CAN HELP OUR TROOPS! Volunteers must be able to reach the south coast in good health and be willing to stay there for a minimum of two months before the war relief festival begins, then a further three months for the duration of the festival. Volunteers are welcome to bring their families and loved ones to enjoy the festivities and will be given an allowance of gold to do so.

PS No one will have to live within two miles of the Sapphire Dragon. There will be armed guards. We promise.’

Uptake was slow at first, but gradually a queue began to form outside the castle. Amelia could hear Harry flogging crystals to visitors: a few chefs, some construction workers, a couple of olive farmers. Amelia saw Sarah the pastry vendor with her daughters, signing up eagerly. Some families had fled twenty years ago and were more than willing to return home; others just wanted to get out of the city before the summer heat set in.

After a week or two, once Amelia was sure people were willing to consider returning to the south, she designed another sign:

‘TWENTIETH ANNIVERSARY WAR RELIEF GAMES AND FESTIVAL: ENTERTAINERS NEEDED.

Have you got a set of skills or hobbies that could entertain our troops? Visit the Royal Castle immediately. We are especially interested in: jazz musicians, circus performers, opera singers, musicians and actors. Volunteers must be able to reach the south coast in good health and be willing to stay there for a minimum of three months. Volunteers are welcome to bring their families and loved ones to enjoy the festivities and will be given an allowance of gold to do so.

PS No one will have to live within two miles of the Sapphire Dragon. No, really. There will be armed guards. We absolutely promise.’

Harry flogged more amulets while both the marching band and the orchestra signed up, shooting one another filthy looks as they queued. Within two weeks, Amelia counted about five hundred entertainers, plus their families.

Finally, Amelia designed another sign and sent it to the army camp at Scavenger’s Ruin:

‘INTRODUCING THE TWENTIETH ANNIVERSARY WAR RELIEF GAMES AND FESTIVAL!

In this 20th anniversary year, by order of the High Council, Scavenger’s Ruin is holding a festival and sporting games to honour you, our brave troops, and your efforts to slay the Sapphire Dragon. All troops will be given four months’ leave, effective immediately, to train and participate in sporting events and to enjoy the festivities.’

Word came back almost immediately. The soldiers were delighted to have some time off, and could the castle please send a list of participating sports? Would duelling be allowed? Amelia smiled and wrote back that yes, duelling was absolutely allowed.

‘Come on you lot!’ Amelia called from her horse a week later. ‘We only have three more weeks until your group leaves for the south! I heard a dud note there!’

In front of her a ninety-piece orchestra, most of its members hand-picked from that first orchestra in Market Street, sweated underneath a canvas shelter. Their conductor sipped iced water and asked nervously, ‘Your Majesty, I must ask again. Why are you holding a festival?’

‘We’re doing something nice for our troops!’ Amelia explained for the thousandth time, to the thousandth bewildered entertainer. ‘It’s about time we had some life in the south of the kingdom, and life means music! The Kingdom of Mirrors used to be famous for our festivals, and we deserve to be famous for them again.’ The ninety-piece orchestra looked like it disagreed. ‘There is a dragon on the south coast,’ she heard one flautist whisper to another. She tried not to imagine outlawing the flute.

‘After you’ve gone through your music, I want you to practise Emergency Plan F Sharp,’ Amelia reminded the conductor. ‘We might need it if things go wrong.’ The conductor nodded and wiped sweat from the bridge of her nose.

‘They’re not going to like it, Your Majesty,’ she murmured with a glance at the flautist.

‘Well, I don’t like ninety-piece orchestras, but here we are!’ Amelia beamed, gritted her teeth and trotted off to the next group of volunteers: a fifty-strong group of surveyors, architects and builders, enlisted to create temporary concert venues and housing for the entertainers.

‘Ladies and gentleman!’ Amelia began, tossing her hair over her shoulder.

‘Actually, Your Majesty, we’re all gentlemen,’ muttered a blacksmith near the front.

‘Really?’ Amelia asked, ‘how awful. No wonder there are so few women in the construction industry. When this is over, I want an apprenticeship programme set up in schools to encourage participation in science, technology, engineering and maths. Anyway!’ she continued, ‘I have an important job for you all. In one week’s time, you will move to the tip of the south coast to discern which buildings can be used for the festival, and design new concert halls, arenas and accommodation. Your new buildings will be temporary as we plan to rebuild the original town eventually, but for the purposes of the festival we need Scavenger’s Ruin to look like a proper town again!’

‘Your Majesty,’ asked the smith who’d spoken earlier. ‘No disrespect, but why are we relocating so close to the Sapphire Dragon? Couldn’t we just move the troops further out of the town for the festival so it’s safer for everyone?’

‘Good question.’ Amelia had discussed the exact location of the festival with her council at length and decided that the workers, of all people, deserved an explanation for the insane levels of danger she was asking them to walk into. ‘Look. Scavenger’s Ruin is where the dragon first arrived all those years ago. It’s where our troops are based. They live there all year round. It’s only right that we’re based there too, to show our respect – and so we can offer proper relief and entertainment. Everything will be at least two miles away from the Sapphire Dragon, but at the centre of the town. We’ve trebled the number of safety charms on Scavenger’s Ruin, and we’ve doubled the number of security workers. I can’t tell you that it’s completely safe,’ she looked the blacksmith in the eye, ‘but I can tell you it’s as safe as we can possibly make it.’

‘It’s a suicide mission,’ someone muttered. Amelia took a deep breath. It was tempting to explain that the real reason the festival needed to be so close to the dragon was to annoy him into flying away, but the less the general public knew of her plan, the less they would complain if it went wrong. If her idea didn’t work, there would be serious calls to bring Prince Nicholas back from Traveler’s End Mountain and reinstate him as crown prince, goat farming predilections or not. There was no way she would give her title back to her irritating, duty-abandoning brother. She would never live it down at family parties for one thing, and for another she wanted to get him back for that time he told her girls were terrible at running the country. He was about thirteen at the time, but still.

Her plan had to work.

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law.

#The Princess and the Dragon and Other Stories About Unlikely Heroes #dragons #yay #fantasy fiction #kidlit #self publish #indie writers #Patreon

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dandaragohan · 8 years ago

Text

Dandara Gohan Ch. 1 Translations

(translation notes)

(what does ‘dandara gohan mean’??)

To read it on pixiv, go here. This manga is free to read online, so please do not repost the manga anywhere. Seriously, you don’t even need a pixiv account to read it. Don’t be a jerk. Also, please do not reproduce my translations anywhere else; they are not always 100% accurate, so I don’t want them going around to parts unknown.

Chapter 1: Fluffy Egg Soufflé

Notes: Pages are numbered according to the online reader on pixiv; there are technically two manga pages per each pixiv page except for the two page spreads. For this chapter, there are 23 “pages”.

Yamaguchi Hajime is better known as Saitō Hajime. Yamaguchi was his birth name. And Okita Sōjirō later becomes Okita Sōji. I went with last names so just keep in mind that Yamaguchi is actually Saitō.

[] = text in boxes

() = text in thought bubbles

“-” = text in speech bubbles

italic = free floating text, usually thoughts or narrative

1/23

Alone on a battlefield ridden with despair, what he remembered were the memories from that time…

Yamaguchi: “I’m...alive?”

2/23

Whether it’s eating or risking our lives, our comrades are always right beside us.

3/23

[Bunkyū 2, 11th month, Edo.]

???: “Hey, Hajime-san, you went ahead and started eating without me!”

Yamaguchi: (Just had to go and say it...)

The voice interrupting this blissful time is…?

4/23

Okita: “So mean…Even though we said we’d eat together…”

Okita: “Ah, oh well! Mister, I’ll have shrimp and eel~!”

Yamaguchi: “How many times do I have to tell you to stop following me around…Okita-kun.”

Okita: “You’re so cold~! Weren’t we practicing the sword together earlier? We’re the same age, so it’s not about that…huh? Are you listening to me, Hajime-saan?”

5/23

Okita: “Wow, looks delicious~!”

Yamaguchi: (The old man here does good work. Everything is fried just right, and there’s a wide variety, too. This food stand is the best in the area……)

Yamaguchi: “Uh…why aren’t you eating?”

Okita: “Oh, well, I can’t stand hot foods. It’s little embarrassing…Oh! If I remove the coating, won’t it cool off quicker?”

Yamaguchi: “Huh!? With your hands!?”

Okita: “It’s hot!”

Yamaguchi: (Well, obviously! What made you think that would go over well?)

Shopkeeper: “A-are you alright…? I thought it was fried properly…”

Yamaguchi: “D…don’t worry about it, please. He’s always like this…He’s a sort of unusual guy…”

6/23

Okita: “Alright then, let’s eat~…”

Okita: “If you peel the coating off, this is just a regular shrimp! It’s not shrimp tempura anymore! Hahahaha! Thanks for the food – eh!?”

Okita: “Are you going already? Heey, Hajime-saan!”

Yamaguchi: [I’m not good at dealing with this person (Okita-kun)…We just can’t see eye-to-eye when it comes to our tastes in food.]

Okita

If it’s sweet, it’s good.

If it’s cold, it’s good.

Yamaguchi

Fond of alcohol

A child of Edo.

(Eats things while they’re still hot.)

Okita: “That was delicious, wasn’t it~”

Yamaguchi: “Be quiet. You’re such a weirdo, cut it out.”

Okita: “You’re so mean!”

7/23

Yamaguchi: “What’s really terrible is that over there, isn’t it.”

Okita: “Hajime-san…Hajime-san! It’s a daifuku vendor! Let’s eat!”

Yamaguchi: “O–ki–ta–kun!”

Okita: “I’m sorry, I’ll treat you…! Huh? I don’t have any money.”

Yamaguchi: “Hey.”

Yamaguchi: [We don’t see eye-to-eye on a lot of things. It was summer when our paths crossed.]

8/23

Yamaguchi: (Why is a strong guy like him killing time by visiting Imo Dojo!?)

9/23

Random Students: “Thank you very much.”

Okita: “Yamaguchi…Hajime-san, was it? I’m Okita Sōjirō. You were really strong. I honestly thought I might lose.”

Yamaguchi: “It’s those who are viciously defeated who should be saying that.”

Okita: “No, I really mean it! Up until now, I’ve never really met anyone with abilities equal to mine…It seems like you could become a lot stronger…How about it? If you want, why not come to our dōjō…”

Yamaguchi: “I refuse.”

Yamaguchi: (So I said, completely without concern.)

10/23

Yamaguchi: [That guy appeared wherever I went.]

Okita: “Ah! It’s Hajime-san! Let’s have a match, just for a bit! Just one point is fine!”

Yamaguchi: “No!”

Yamaguchi: [Unfortunately, we ended up taking our meals together under the name of friendship.]

Okita: “Thank you for treating me…Hajime-san, you’re so nice! Ahaha!”

Yamaguchi: “You can stop saying that already.”

Okita: “These really are the best for winter, huh. Yum.”

Yamaguchi: “Though I’d be in an even better mood if it wasn’t you who was next to me…”

Okita: “The person who came up with keeping warm in winter with brazier really was great. The person who thought to keep them warm even in the winter by using a brazier was impressive.”

[4 mon for 1 piece = 80 yen

Okita-kun didn’t even have that much.]

Okita: “I’m thankful to whoever thought of it…I hope that person got enough credit for such a thing…”

Yamaguchi: “What’re you talking about?”

Okita: “……”

11/23

Okita: “Hey, you know…Kondō-sensei, right? He’s the young master of the Shieikan Dojo…”

Kondō: “Yamaguchi-kuun!”

Yamaguchi: (That energetic looking person, huh.)

Okita: “Recently…sensei has become a shut-in…He’s depressed and hasn’t been eating much…”

Yamaguchi: “W…Why!? A hikikomori…?”

Okita: “He was betrayed by the people from Kōbusho.”

In this era, the commoners who could follow the way of the sword as samurai was limited. Instructors of the Kobusho taught military arts to the sons of noble families...XXX

Okay, I’m sorry, I have no clue what the entire sentence is saying. This sentence is too long...Here is the original line: その中で最も多くの人が憧れそして狭き門なのが名門の子に武道を教える'講武所の教授職’

Okita: (With Kondo-sensei’s strength, he was unofficially offered a teaching job, but…)

(Past) Kondō: “Yes~! An unofficial offer!”

(Past) Okita: “Young master, congratulations!”

Okita: “He was cast aside because of his social status…”

12/23

Yamaguchi: “It’s not unusual that the efforts we put in, and everything we do, is decided at birth, is it?

Okita: “Well, then I wonder what we even live for…”

Yamaguchi: “Hey, Okita-kun…”

13/23

Yamaguchi: “You can’t be thinking…to increase your skills by fighting me…and assassinate the man who betrayed Kondō-san, are you? Why aren’t you answering? Why are you ignoring me!”

Okita: “But I haven’t even said anything, have I? No way~”

Yamaguchi: “If you intend to kill a person for such a reason, as your friend, I’ll stop you!”

Okita: “Hahaha. You’re so serious, Hajime-san…It was a joke. I wanted to surprise you a little. I won’t do anything that would make sensei even sadder.”

Yamaguchi: (That didn’t sound like a joke at all…)

14/23

Okita: “I just want sensei to be happy, that’s all…”

Yamaguchi: (What’s that all about…)

Yamaguchi: [I’m really not good at dealing with this person.

Yamaguchi: [I have never once wished for another’s happiness.]

Random Family Members: You’re the second son. You won’t succeed the family. You serve no use.

Yamaguchi: [This person next to me…]

Yamaguchi: “Let’s go to the grocer’s to buy eggs.”

Okita: “Huh? Eggs?”

Yamaguchi: “We’re going to pay Kondō-san a visit. Eggs are a must-have, right?”

Okita: “He’ll be overjoyed! Hajime-san really is nice after all~”

Yamaguchi: “No I’m not!”

15/23

Yamaguchi: (I’m not kind. I just happened to sympathize with Kondō-san, who had been prevented from doing what he wanted to do because of who he is. I’m just a no-good person who wants to be saved by sympathizing with such a person, who always seeks change, struggles, and is betrayed.)

Okita: “Ah. I’m not very good at this~…The shell got in…”

Yamaguchi: “Okita-kun, why is the egg in a teacup…?”

Okita: “Eh? We’re giving it to sensei, right?”

Yamaguchi: “Yeah, but when people are in a weakened state, isn’t that way too pungent!? As expected, if you don’t cook you’re useless at it.”

Okita: “Huh, a cookbook? Where did you pull that out from?”

Yamaguchi: “It’s popular on the streets.”

16/23

Yamaguchi: “You copy down the pages that interest you in a notebook like this one...It’s a hobby…”

Okita: “Ooh…how diligent of you, Hajime-san…so you like this sort of thing? Then, Hajime-san, please take the lead! I’ll be your assistant.”

Yamaguchi: “That’s fine, but…”

Okita: “Which should we make? Egg dishes are popular, so there are a lot of options…What’s this one?”

Fluffy Eggs

Banquet Food

Soy sauce

Eggs

Sugar

Yamaguchi: “Fluffy eggs, huh. You’re the kind of guy who’d write the name down if it interests you.”

Okita: “It says banquet food, so it’s the kind of cooking an important person would eat, right?”

[Fluffy Egg Souffle]

It’s a dish that was eaten by the third Tokugawa Shogun Iemitsu. It is also described in Tokaido Hizakurige.

Yamaguchi: “It’s not that difficult, is it? I’m an amateur at this stuff…I always eat out, after all.”

Okita: “But we can do it if it’s written in the cookbook! By the way, aren’t you the one who wrote it?”

Yamaguchi: “It sounds easy when you say it, but…It says mix until foam rises from the egg…?”

17/23

Okita: “Um, so I ‘take the dashi’…dashi? H…Hajime-san…! Um…it says dashi…what should I do…!?”

Yamaguchi: “You’re so troublesome. If it says dashi, it means katsuo. Damn it! How long am I supposed to stir this!”

Yamaguchi: “It’s over there. Use that.”

Okita: “Eh…This!? This is…?…I don’t understand. The katsuo I know is supposed to be fish…I’ve never eaten food with this tree like thing in it…”

Yamaguchi: “…What’re you doing, standing in a daze. You have to shave that!”

Okita: “If you know, then you do it, please~!”

Yamaguchi: “Alright already, give it!”

Okita: “Wah~”

Yamaguchi: “…After, put the boiled dashi in…Okita-kun, gently pour the eggs in please.”

Okita: “Okay!”

18/23

Yamaguchi: “I said gently…!”

Okita: “Sorry. I’m too rough…!”

Yamaguchi: “A guy like you really is…”

Okita: “I hope it’s delicious~~!”

Yamaguchi: “…We can’t really tell if it’s going to come out…”

Okita: “Eh? A failure…!? Even though we used three eggs already!?”

Yamaguchi: “Yeah, looks like it…my money, that is…”

[In this era, raw eggs cost 20 mon for 1 = 400 yen.]

Yamaguchi: “Lower the flame here…and put…the cover on…”

19/23

Yamaguchi: “A success? Failure…? It…it looks like we did it…?”

Okita: “It’s so fluffy~Let’s taste a bit.”

Yamaguchi: “Okay.”

The じー sound effect means “staaare”.

Yamaguchi: “Hurry up and eat!”

Okita: “Ow!”

Okita: “……Ah, HOT!”

Insert the sound you make when you try to blow/jostle hot food around in your mouth so it doesn’t burn you (though it usually does anyway). I have no clue how to render that sound in English.

Yamaguchi: “Haha, what an idiot.”

Both: “Delicious…!”

20/23

Okita: “This is the first time we’ve agreed with each other, isn’t it.”

Yamaguchi: “Well…so you mean that anyone who eats this would say it’s tasty…”

Okita: “If you keep talking, the fluff will dissolve…”

Yamaguchi: “He’s already gulping it down…It has an even simpler, lighter, and more soothing dashi flavor than than a rolled omelette.”

(?): “Even if you have no appetite this should…”

I think it’s Yamaguchi saying this, but I can’t be sure since the person talking trails off (Okita has a clear polite speech pattern, Yamaguchi is more casual).

Yamaguchi: Then, Kondō-sensei will surely…

Kondō: “Aah…it’s delicious. I’ll eat it…”

Okita: “I…I’m glad…”

21/23

Okita: “You’ve been losing weight more and more recently. You had me really worried!”

Kondō: “I’m sorry, Sōjirō…I’ll go to the dojo tomorrow.”Okita: “Really!?”

Yamaguchi: (Even though I’m the one who worked hard making it…)

Yamaguchi: [Even though I’m angry at Okita-kun for showing off, somehow I can’t hate him.]

Okita: “Hajime-san.”

22/23

Yamaguchi: “You again?”

Okita: “Hello. Ah, ever since then Kondo-sensei’s appetite has been returning little by little!”

Yamaguchi: “…Ah, is that so. That’s good.”

Okita: “Yup! He even started coming to the dojo again.”

Yamaguchi: “So you don’t need me anymore. Practice can be left up to sensei…”

Okita: “That’s not what I came here to talk about today.”

I have no clue what the next line says:

「脱・厄介者への足がかりになれそうなお話があるんです」

Yamaguchi: “Huh?”

23/23

Okita: “It’s called the ‘Rōshigumi’…um…I forgot the details! Anyway, come here for a sec!”

Yamaguchi: “H…hey!?”

Okita: “I had fun with you around, Hajime-san! So please come with me.”

Yamaguchi: “Wha…”

Yamaguchi: (What a selfish guy…!)Yamaguchi:

Get involved with merciless people, I jumped straight into the maelstrom of this era. Thinking back on it later, what happened up until now was only the beginning. At that time I still did not know the significance of it.

#dandara gohan #tonogaya miyuki #chapter 1 #dandara gohon translations

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