#saul goodman hcs

[slamminslamminmcgill]

Chicanerous - Jimmy McGill/Male Reader (NSFW!)

jimmy brings you to meet his brother chuck. though due to chuck's homophobic behavior towards jimmy in the past, jimmy wants revenge. he has you wear a vibrator to chuck's house and sneakily controls it in front of him. tags/warnings: vibrators, sex toys, voyeurism, exhibitionism, referenced homophobia anatomical terms: none! (this was completely unintentional so if you're a cis man/amab enjoy ig lol) words: 3,115 ao3 link author's notes: i hate you chuck mcgill 😌

“Forty bucks.”

“No.”

“Fifty.”

“Jimmy, I’m not doing this.”

“…Forty-five.”

“Did you just go down?”

“Oh, good, you are listening!” Jimmy laughed, “But seriously. Fifty-five? C’mon! It’ll be the easiest money you’ve ever made… and the sexiest.” 

That was probably true, but it’d also be the most humiliating and mean-spirited way to earn a quick buck. You refused yet again. “Jimmy, no. I’m not going to harass your brother like this. I’ve never even met the guy!” 

“Trust me, you’re not missing much. Chuck’s a…” Jimmy paused and tried to think of a nicer word than ‘asshole’. “Let’s call him an acquired taste. If you have a taste for mothballs and bigotry, that is.”

“Bigotry?” You questioned. “Oh, god, don’t tell me-”

But he told you. “Raging homophobe! Jesus, when I was like 14, I told him I think I like boys and girls, and he practically dragged me by the ear to our local church for confession. He said he was doing me a favor by not telling our parents. Can you believe that?” Jimmy scoffed, but there was a profound sadness oozing out of his pores. He sniffled and cracked his neck; you hoped it wasn’t to choke back tears. 

You could see the pain in Jimmy’s demeanor and empathized with him. “Really? God, that’s so fucked, I’m so sorry. And he never apologized?”

“Are you kidding?! He thinks he’s the Messiah!” Jimmy dropped the box he was holding on the table and paced around your living room. “The ever-infallible Charles McGill Jr.! He thinks I’m the one who needs to repent for living a sinner’s lifestyle. He really goes above and beyond, y’know. Hates the sin and the sinner.” He plopped down on your couch and sighed.

You sat down next to him and put an arm around his back. Concerned, yet confused. “Why do you still talk to him, then?”

“His condition.” Jimmy explained, “He can’t take care of himself, so he needs me to brave the electricity-ridden world for him and get him what he needs. So, he kinda has to keep me around. That’s the only reason he’s even agreed to meet you.”

That tracked. A homophobe who pushed his younger brother to pray the gay away would probably not be too kind to said younger brother’s boyfriend. “So… what, he only cares about you because you keep him alive? That’s shitty. Fuck him.”

“Fuck him, indeed.” Jimmy concurred, “You know what? Nevermind. Don’t even worry about meeting him, honestly. I shouldn’t have even brought it up. No sense in bringing you over there if he’s not gonna like you, anyway.”

That gave you an idea. If Chuck wouldn’t like you on your best behavior, why bother with pleasantries? If he was going to think you were a degenerate pervert regardless of what you did, why not have a little fun and hit a homophobe where it hurts? Fuck turning the other cheek; take the upper hand.

“...I’ll do it.”

-

You squirmed in the passenger seat of Jimmy’s two-toned Suzuki Esteem. The vibrator wasn’t invasive, but it made its presence known. It was hard to sit still with it inside you. You needed friction.

“Well, someone’s got ants in their pants!” Jimmy chuckled and killed the ignition. “It’ll probably sound more like bees once I turn it on, though.” He fished a small remote out of his pocket and pressed the power button. A singular vibration pulsed through you, making you jump.

“How loud does this thing get?” You asked.

“It probably won’t be too obvious at first since it’s under your clothes, but he’s definitely gonna hear it once it really gets going. Now, let’s rap for a second.” Jimmy put the remote back in his pocket, unbuckled his seatbelt, and faced you. “No matter how loud it gets, you don’t hear it, I don’t hear it. We lie through our teeth and make Chuck feel like he’s going crazy. You get me?”

You got him, “Yeah, sure,” though there was an obvious hole in his plan, “But, like… if it’s vibrating, I’m gonna be, like… moaning and stuff like that. Wouldn’t he notice that?”

Jimmy waved you off, “Cover it up, if you can. Make whatever excuse you gotta. But if you can’t or he starts to question you, I’ll step in. You’ll be fine. You ready?”

“I guess.” You unbuckled your seatbelt and stepped out of the car. Jimmy locked it and squeezed behind you, making his way to the mailbox.

“Gotta put all your electronics in here. Anything with a battery can set him off. He’ll know if you forget something.” Jimmy loudly proclaimed as he opened the mailbox and stuffed his phone, watch, and keys inside. When he was done, he grabbed you by your hips and whispered in your ear. “He’s watching.”

Your eyes scanned the front of the empty-looking house, and sure enough, you saw two fingers pulling the blinds apart, and disgruntled eyes peering through them. You flinched, and hastily dug in your pocket for your phone. “Jesus…” you grumbled. “Fifty-five bucks for this, right?”

“How’s about forty-five and the best head you’ve ever gotten?” Jimmy kissed the back of your head as you closed the mailbox.

You spun around and flicked his forehead. “Nope. Fifty-five. And don’t act like you’re not gonna give me head regardless.”

“Oh, you know I will.” Jimmy smiled at you. Some tapping on the window broke up your intimate moment. Chuck was getting impatient. “Coming!” Jimmy called out and grabbed your hand, leading you up the walkway to Chuck’s front door. He stopped you in front of a metal pole. “Ground yourself.”

“What?”

“Just tap the thingy.” Jimmy demonstrated by tapping his finger on the pole, and you did the same. Having grounded yourselves, you were ready to enter. Jimmy knocked on the door, and Chuck answered with faux hospitality.

“Welcome! Jimmy, good to see you, as always. And, uh… what was your name again?” You could tell he was fighting to fake a smile for you.

You reminded him of your name and offered your hand to shake. “Pleasure to meet you. Jimmy’s told me so much about you.”

Chuck hesitated before grabbing your hand, as if being gay was contagious. Physical contact with a homosexual was sure to poison him with an unquenchable craving for cock and balls. Nevertheless, he persisted, taking your hand in his and offering a limp, wet noodle handshake. “Oh, all good things, I hope?”

“Of course!” You lied.

“Well, come on in.” Chuck stepped aside and allowed you to enter his delusional home. “I apologize for the darkness. Jimmy informed you of my condition, I presume?”

“He did, yeah. It must be tough to live with,” You answered with mock sympathy, in reality you couldn’t give less of a fuck about his living situation. It’s not like you’d ever be invited over again after today. Still, you tried to come up with a compliment. “You seem to be handling it really well, though. I’d imagine you have to get pretty creative. I don’t know what I’d do in your position.”

Jimmy swooped in to back you up. “I told you he’s a smart guy! Managed to build a life for himself in the 21st century without any tech whatsoever. I don’t know anyone else who could solve a problem like that.”

Chuck forced some laughter out, “Ah, well, I do what I can to get by. Please, have a seat.” He gestured to the couch, where you and Jimmy sat down. He situated himself across from you, and folded his hands in his lap. “So, how did you meet my brother?”

“Well, actually, I-”

Click

Bzzzzzzzzzzz

You should’ve seen that coming, but you didn’t. With no warning, Jimmy had ignited the vibrator, which was now rattling against your sensitive walls. You gasped, but faked a sneeze to cover it up. 

It was on the lowest setting, so thankfully Chuck didn’t notice the noise. “Bless you.”

“Thank you…” You replied. Already, your nerves were on fire. You knew Jimmy wouldn’t rush out the gate guns blazing, but this was much harder than you expected it to be. You couldn’t imagine you’d keep up the charade for very long. It took you a while to catch your train of thought. “We, uh… I work at the…” You swallowed a moan, ”...the nail salon, where he lives, and I… I saw him come in one day, and, like… I just kinda… shot my shot, I guess.”

Chuck raised an eyebrow. “You seem tense. Are you feeling alright?”

You nodded, hoping your body wasn’t shaking as much as the toy was. “Nerves, sorry.”

Jimmy slung an arm around you and hugged you from the side. “He’s just a little anxious, that’s all. He wants to make a good impression.”

Chuck nodded, content with that explanation. “Right, right. Well, I must say I’m not… thrilled, that my brother is with another man, but I hope that-”

Click

That son of a bitch. Jimmy turned it up. In the middle of Chuck’s sentence. You had no time to stall your reaction, groaning audibly and grabbing Jimmy’s leg for support. 

“You feeling alright, babe?” Jimmy asked, brushing some hair out of your face as you leaned into him, his other hand tucked into his pocket with the remote. “Jeez, you’re all red. You took your meds today, right?”

If anything, you appreciated Jimmy’s ability to lie on the spot. There was no medication for you to have taken. It was bullshit, all the way down. You let him lead, your dance partner in the tango of dishonesty. “I… I thought I did… Today’s Wednesday, right?”

Jimmy gave you a concerned, sheepish look. “Today’s Thursday, honey.” 

Click

“Oh fuck,” You moaned, and upon realizing where you were, slapped your hand over your mouth and apologized to Chuck. “O-Oh my god! I’m sorry! I-I don’t mean to be rude.”

“It’s… quite alright,” Chuck replied, his skepticism slowly inching upward. “Would you like some water?”

Jimmy answered for you. “Water would be great, thanks. He gets dehydrated easily.”

As Chuck stood up to get you some water, Jimmy pressed the button one more time, making the vibrator buzz harder and louder. Finally, it was enough for Chuck to hear.

Chuck winced, his face contorted in pain as he stared you both down. “Is that… Is that a cell phone?”

Jimmy hugged you closer to him and stroked your hair, pretending to comfort you through your “symptoms”. He gave Chuck an incredulous look. “What? What’re you talking about? Do you hear something?” 

“Y-Yes, actually. I hear something… vibrating… like a cell phone.” Chuck grimaced and grit his teeth to bear the pain. “Jimmy, I thought you told him.”

Jimmy went on the defense, “I did! Chuck, I swear, we put all our devices in the mailbox. There’s nothing here that could be vibrating. Are you sure that’s what it is?”

You backed him up, “Y-Yeah, I don’t…” and took a deep breath to maintain poise, “I don’t hear anything either.”

And Jimmy scored the goal. “And he has great ears, too. He’s got perfect pitch. He’s actually in school to be a classical pianist. So if he doesn’t hear it, I kinda gotta take his word for it.”

Another lie. You couldn’t play piano to save your life, but goddamn, Jimmy could play anyone to save his.

Chuck wasn’t backing down, though his composure was starting to slip. “I-I’m serious. I hear something vibrating. Are you telling me you two seriously don’t hear that?”

Jimmy sighed, pitying his brother and his circumstances. “Chuck, buddy, no one else hears what you’re talking about. Just… How about you just go in the kitchen for a bit, take a breather, and maybe it’ll be gone when you come back?”

Chuck didn’t answer Jimmy. He scurried into the kitchen and away from the offending sound.

Once he was sure Chuck was gone, Jimmy switched the vibrator off, finally giving you a moment to breathe. He kissed you on the cheek and whispered to you, “Isn’t this fun? You’re doing great.”

You giggled and kissed him back, “It’s… definitely exciting. You’re a genius.”

“I know, I know. That little piece of plastic is making you feel real good, huh?”

“Yeah…”

“Not as good as me though, right?”

“Not by a longshot.”

Chuck returned with three glasses of water, one in each hand and cradling the other under his arm. “My apologies for that,” he said as he set the glasses down on the table. He took his seat once more. “Well, Jimmy, I hate to say it, but you were right. I don’t hear that sound anymore, and I feel perfectly fine. I wonder what that could’ve been.”

Jimmy picked up his glass. “Are your coolers good? Maybe you ate some spoiled food and it’s giving you hallucinations. That’s what they say happened in the Salem Witch Trials.” He took a sip and set it down on the table.

You did the same, chugging half the glass in one go, playing into the easily dehydrated lie.

“No, no, the coolers are fine. I don’t think that would’ve done it.” Chuck drank some of his water and turned his attention to you, hoping to steer the conversation away from his ailment. “So! You’re a classical pianist?”

You gave him a timid smile, unsure of how you should be acting due to your medical condition that Jimmy decided you had. “Y-Yeah, I, uh… Been playing since I was three. I’m a senior at UNM.” Lies upon lies, you hoped they were as good as Jimmy’s. But if not, he’d have your back.

Chuck smiled, warmer than you expected from him. Were you actually impressing him? “Well, that’s wonderful! I’m a huge fan of classical music. My ex-wife was a violinist.”

Jimmy butted in, “And a damn good one, at that! I guess McGill’s are drawn to musicians, huh?”

“Thank you, Jimmy.” Chuck said with a heaping spoonful of sarcasm. “You know, I actually have a grand piano here. Not to put you on the spot or anything, but do you think you could play-”

Clickclickclickclickclick

BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

Jimmy McGill was trying to get you killed.

Or, save your ass, because if he hadn’t intervened, you would’ve been pressured into bullshitting your way through a Beethoven sonata.

Or, make you cum in front of his homophobic brother, just to fuck with him.

Or, and most likely, all of the above.

He’d cranked the vibrator up to max, making you cry out in pleasure, and Chuck in pain. Thankfully, his brother was somehow louder than you were.

Chuck covered his ears and shouted, “Agh! It’s back! The buzzing! It’s back!” He jumped up and ran to open a cabinet, where he apparently kept large sheets of tinfoil to wrap himself in. As he put on his Chipotle burrito cosplay, he put the heat on his brother. “Jimmy, whatever you’re doing, whatever… device you two brought with you, just turn it off! Turn it off and get out of my house!” 

“I’m not doing anything, Chuck!” Jimmy stood up and shouted over all the commotion, rushing to Chuck’s side. “I still don’t hear what you’re talking about! Where is it coming from?”

Chuck whipped his body around, the foil crinkling with his movements, and pointed a shaking finger at you. “Him! It’s coming from him! He’s got something on him, and I hear it! Don’t tell me it’s nothing!”

“He doesn’t have anything on him! I checked! He’s got no devices, doohickeys, gadgets, gizmos, nothing that could make that kind of-!” Suddenly, Jimmy froze, his expression melting to one of pure fear. You figured he’d get the letter for his Oscar nomination soon enough. “Oh no…” 

“What?! What is it?!” Chuck panicked.

Jimmy hurried back to where you were sitting on the couch, and laid his hand on the left side of your chest. “It’s his pacemaker… It’s going crazy.” 

It took everything within you to not burst out laughing. Or moaning. You bit your lip and let Jimmy do the talking as you rocked your hips back and forth on the couch cushion. 

“His what?!” Chuck yelled the obvious question. “He’s so young, how the hell does he have a pacemaker?!”

“That’s none of your business, Chuck!” Jimmy grabbed your shoulders and pressed his forehead to yours. “I’m so sorry, honey. I didn’t think it’d be a problem. I’m gonna take you home, and you’re gonna take your meds, okay? You’re gonna be okay. Come on, upsy-daisy.” 

Jimmy hoisted you up off the couch. The vibrator had done a number on your balance, and the new angle had it pressed up into just the right spot. You collapsed into him and moaned his name, not even trying to hide it anymore. “Oh, Jimmyyy…”

Playing it off like a champ, Jimmy shushed you and walked you towards the door. “I know, I know, sweetheart. It’s okay. You’re gonna be fine. I promise.” He opened the front door, and turned to his brother one last time. “I gotta get him home. We’ll talk later, Chuck. See ya.”

Even after the door was closed, he kept up the act as he walked you to the car, just in case Chuck was watching through the window. “There we go, almost there. We’ll get you home, baby boy, don’t you worry.” He opened the door for you and even buckled you in. When he walked around to his side, he saw Chuck peering through the windows again. He got in the driver’s seat, turned the car on, and sped down the block, past Chuck’s limited field of view. 

Once Chuck was out of sight and out of mind, Jimmy turned the car and the vibrator off. He grabbed you and started kissing all over your face like a madman.

“That was amazing! Baby, you were perfect! You are a star! Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you!” Jimmy praised as he hugged you tight and kissed anywhere he could plant his lips on you.

You laughed hysterically, tickled pink from the thrill and your boyfriend’s cheesy affections. “Yeah, yeah, you’re welcome. That was crazy! What am I again? A college student with a pacemaker that’s training to be a classical pianist? How the fuck did you come up with that?!”

Jimmy laughed too, wiping tears of joy from his eyes. “Ah, a magician never reveals his tricks. I’ll get you the cash when we get back.” And like the magician he was, you didn’t see the sleight-of-hand of him reaching into his pocket. “But first…”

Clickclickclickclickclick

BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

“How’s about we finish what we started?”

[clunkyderp]

ranking breaking bad/better call saul characters by bangability

this is based purely on my own personal taste and headcanons. reply/rb with your own rankings! :3

16. chuck mcgill

starting out, we have chuck. i’m sorry to all the chuck fans out there, (because i adore you) but he is likely the last character in the brba universe that i’d bang. he reminds me of a wet paper towel, and we would not be sexually compatible in any way. i'd better not fuck chuck

15. walter white

oh, walt… you stupid son of a bitch. i would never bang him, he doesn’t deserve it. he is a greedy lover that only cares about getting himself off. once he's finished, the sex is over. i feel bad for skyler (or, jesse, if you subscribe to that) knowing she’s never been satisfied.. more on that later.

14. hank schrader

hank seems like the type to only want to do doggystyle, idk why i’m getting this vibe. i wouldn’t bang him because i can see him being very inattentive. aftercare? who’s she?

13. marie schrader

marie is a beautiful lady, but we’d likely be very incompatible. she seems very traditional. i can see her in a cute nurse outfit and appreciate, tho.

12. todd alquist

i don’t want to bang todd, but if i did, i know he’d be on some cbt freakshit. he definitely wants to be stepped on and i think we’d at least have a little fun if we banged.

11. tuco salamanca

tuco is fucking crazy but i would give him a chance if it was my last day alive. i know he lays psychotic pipe and has probably strangled people to death while creaming them.

10. gus fring

he's really pretty, but he seems like he'd be very controlling and emotionless. also seems like the type to have a crazy fetish that he must incorporate every time you have sex. anyway, the short, brooding type isn't mine, but i know he'd be thorough, so that counts for something.

9. howard hamlin

i think he's a handsome guy, but imo he'd be pretty stale in bed. he gives pillow prince vibes though and i feel like i could get down with it.

8. skyler white

mommy. i would treat her right, just saying. she's gorgeous and i like that she's tall. even though we might not be into the same stuff, i'd still hit.

7. mike ehrmantraut

i like mike's attitude and overall personality, and he's a handsome dude. the only problem is his age. i know i'd have to be doing tricks on it for this old guy. would it be worth it? honestly i don't know. why is he so high up on the list? uh... finger

6. lalo salamanca

i’d fuck lalo because i know he knows how to fuck. dude’s obviously a pro who i’ve got nothing on. i’d let him take the wheel and do whatever he thinks is best.

5. lydia rodarte-quayle

she literally wouldn't like me, and i'd kind of be into it. i may or may not want to worship her feet and legs. i'm with todd on this one.

4. nacho varga

sooo i know i said i didn't take my men short and brooding, but i need to motorboat him. nacho is super cute, and even though he'd probably be too quiet for my taste, he'd make up for it in physical strength. i know he'd be a beast on top. he could take some anger out on me fr..

3. kim wexler

the things i would do for her aren't even funny. if she said jump, i'd do a backflip for the first time in my life right there on the spot. honestly, her confidence would make me very nervous, so i don't know how well i'd perform, but if she gave me a chance, i'd be on my knees for her in a heartbeat. she could enslave me. it's encouraged, actually.

2. jesse pinkman

i would do him right if it was the last thing i did. i’d give him my all. our souls would mesh and shit. i’d be helplessly in love with him afterwards and there’d be nothing i could do. he is beautiful like a siren’s call and to that i say ahoy matey. i would drown

1. jimmy mcgill/saul goodman

and in first place: JIMMY!!!!!!!!!!! i’d fuck this guy sideways, on the ceiling, day in day out like it was my job. clocking in for the dick. i think i’d enjoy sex with jimmy no matter how well he performed. saul on the other hand might feel a little grimy but i can see him being more skilled. either way, if i got to bang him, i'd die happy. thanks for reading!

[yourfaveisomegaverse]

Saul Goodman from Better Call Saul is an Omega

[couldtransitionsaveher]

JIMMY MCGILL/SAUL GOODMAN from BREAKING BAD/BETTER CALL SAUL

JUSTIFICATIONS:

"jesse we need to go to los PRONOUNS HORMONES to cook ESTROGEN for saul GOODWOMAN!!!" - Anonymous

"breaking bad if it was woke: jesse we need to go to LOS PRONOUNS HORMONES to make ESTROGEN for saul GOODWOMAN !!!!

^ except im being so fr. i think if she knew she was a woman she would still be living in lesbian slippin jimmy bliss with kim, like, none of that other stuff wouldve happened." - Anonymous

Reminder: Submissions are always open! Submit here!

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[mcwexlie]

old

[bettercallroasty]

MY GOD HES AN ICON

[depressopax]

Hi!!! if it's okay (and if your request is still open) I was wondering if I could request a fluff scenario for Jimmy McGill? :D where he gets all soft and loving sjdjdj can be both sfw and nsfw ... thank you !! ♡

Thank you for the request!!! <3 Been meaning to write about Jimmy for quite a while, so this was the perfect sign to do it lmaooo I was gonna do a NSFW too but realized that the SFW version was at 1K word already 💀 Will do a part 2 tho!  Oh well, enjoy these cheesy Jimmy headcanons 🥹🫶

Jimmy McGill relationships headcanons

Fandom - Breaking Bad/Better call Saul

Jimmy x gn!reader || SFW HC's

Pairing: Jimmy McGill/Saul Goodman x gender-neutral reader Genre: Fluff, headcanons Warning(s): None that I can think off?? Cuss words maybe, slightly angsty Jimmy lol. Reader is gender-neutral and referred to as "partner" and gn!pet-names. Words: 1.1K Summary: Being in a relationship with Jimmy McGill would include... English is not my main language, if I make any spelling mistakes please let me know so I can improve my writing! <3 || AO3 link || Masterlist || Request || NSFW version ||

Jimmy is not good at figuring out his feelings.

That’s why it took him a while to realize he’d fallen in love with you. 

It’d take some time for him to accept what he’s feeling though.

Homeboy would be in denial at first. He’s scared to fall in love with someone, in fear of commitment and getting hurt etc…

But he’d show interest in other ways, without realizing it himself.

We’re talking about cheesy stuff: - Always looking good (and that’s not so difficult, HE GORGEOUSSSSS 👀) - Trying to impress you with his knowledge about things - Making sure to say something funny and make others laugh when you’re around, to let you know how funny and amazing he is lol - Compliments and teasing 

Noticing his attempt, you straight up ask him about it. “...Do you like me, Jimmy?” “What?? I-” … “Yes. I do.”

Once it’s said and done, he eventually asks you out on a date.

Listen… Jimmy may be overconfident, especially when it comes to his seduction skills

However, there’s something about you that makes him nervous.

What you think about him and how he comes across matters to him.

That’s why he plans a date weeks ahead, trying to make everything perfect

He tries figuring out what you like and dislike so he can use that to make a good impression. 

He takes you out to some fancy restaurant (RIP early season Jimmy’s wallet 😭)

The date goes well and he is very smug with his effort.

After a few dates, Jimmy realizes he’s fallen for you.

At first he tries to hide it. He doesn’t want to come across as “desperate” or “needy”. 

But then again… He’s not good at hiding his true feelings.

Luckily, you feel the same and eventually you become a couple for real. 

He was the first one to say “I love you”, and did so without realizing it.

You were leaving for work or something and he just goes: “Bye, love ya!” Completely flustered when he heard what he just said.

When you say it back, he feels a wave of relief. 

After that, he makes sure to say ILY as often as he can.

He won’t shut up about you. Like ever. 

“So then my partner said…” “My partner brought me this shirt!” “I’m taking my babe out on a date tonight” And everyone else will eventually be like: 😐”Shut up”😐

He’ll refer to you as his spouse/wife/husband, watching everyone confused “You’re married?” “I will be soon” 🤭

Jimmy’s a sucker for cute pet names. And yeah, some of them are probably “cringe” but that won’t stop him 

Baby, Boo, Sugar, Sweetie, Hot stuff, Doll, Kitten (😭)

He loves it when you wear his shirts. Especially as lounge clothing or when sleeping.

Jimmy also finds matching outfits adorable. 

Would probably take you shopping for either suits/blazers or just hoodies that you can match. 

He also buys matching jewelry, towels, morning robes etc etc… He’s one of those guys 😭

He has a picture of you standing on the desk in his office, as a way to carry the sweetheart with him all the time. 

…And also to brag about you to anyone that enters his office (but he puts the picture away when dealing with some of his unpredictable clients, homeboy is overprotective)

Speaking of being overprotective: He deals with a lot of shady people, so he’s very careful with who he chooses to trust when it comes to talking his love to you.

He prioritizes your safety over anything else. 

Ofc he’s scared for his own safety too, but pretty much puts it aside to make sure you’re safe first off. 

If danger comes up, he’d make sure to find somewhere safe for you to stay whilst he deals with it.

He would go so far as hiring a bodyguard for you tbh.

Being with him might be a struggle too

Homeboy is a bit unpredictable and impulsive

Doing stupid things is his speciality- 😭

No but literally, you’ll sometimes have to stop him from acting out on his weird revenge ideas or stuff that could get him into trouble.

“I was just gonna-” “No.” “But…” “Jimmy, no.” 

Sometimes you succeed, sometimes you don’t. But you love him either ways. <3

He also likes talking shit about people with you *cough* probably Howard *cough* - sure, a bit rude - but he finds it hilarious lol 

Lot of in-jokes between you and him

Jimmy is a daydreamer and is easily distracted

Especially by you.

He sometimes gets stuck thinking about you when doing boring work.

Until Francesca tells him to pull himself together lmao

Jimmy spends all possible time together with you. 

He is ambitious and serious about work, but after you and him became a couple his priorities changed. 

He finds time to spend with you. Last thing he wants is for you to feel like he cares more about work than he does for you.

If you’re adventurous and like being outdoors, he does too.

But honestly? He prefers cuddling at home and watching movies with you.

He is not a good chef, so he buys a lot of food from restaurants and brings it home if you’ve had a long day at work.

He makes sure to be a romantic bastard too. 

Candlelit dinners, taking baths together, picnics… You name it. He loves spoiling you. 

He wouldn’t admit it to anyone else but hear me out… Home-spa dates 👀

He did use to have his office at a nail salon, so he knows his way around those things

If you allow him to, he likes painting your nails - with him choosing the color

Like I said, Jimmy enjoys cuddling you.

He has a lot of feelings, traumas etc pent up, which he dares to let out around you.

He has learnt that he can be vulnerable with you and not get judged, which he appreciates.

That’s why he loves coming home to you after a long day and simply resting in your arms.

He prefers being the little spoon - to feel protected and loved by you. <3

To summarize: It might take him a while to put the pieces together and actually confess his feelings for you - but once he does he spends every day letting you know how much you mean to him.

I just remembered why I love Jimmy sm AHHH he deserves love and happiness <3<3 Part 2 soon!

[livingdeadmlm]

Master list Requests:Open!

Fluff🤍

Nsfw🩶

Smut 🖤

headcannon format 🕸️

Oneshot format🌾

Kinktober 2023🪨

Kinktober 2024🪻

Characters with no links have no fics as of 12/15/2024

Also this is in no way every fic I have written as I went crazy when I made this blog so most Jojo fics are lost to time (and not good)

Red Dead Redemption

Arthur Morgan

Low Honor Morgan Priest Reader 🩶🖤🪻🌾

Werewolf Morgan HCs 🕸️

John Marston

Javier Escuella

Voyeurism🩶🖤🪻🌾

Charles Smith

Dutch Van der Linde

Kieran Duffy

Sean MacGuire

Obey me!

Lucifer

Mammon

Pet Play🩶🖤🪻🌾

Tail Play🩶🖤🪨🌾

Leviathan

Diavolo

Breast Worshipping 🩶🖤🪻🌾

Solomon

Barbatos

Simeon

Asmodeus

Beelzebub

Belphegor

House MD

Gregory House

James Wilson

Robert Chase

Eric Forman

Mouthwashing

Captain Curly

Daisuke

Age Gap🩶🪻🌾

Metalocalypse

Nathan explosion

Table Sex🩶🖤🪻🌾

Pickles the drummer

Toki Wartooth

Charles offdensen

Blood Play🩶🪻🌾

Skwisgaar Skwigelf

Yandere Skwisgaar 🖤🌾

Dethklok

Nudes with Dethklok🩶🖤🪻🕸️🌾

Doing their Makeup before a Show🤍🕸️

After a Long Tour🤍🕸️

Breaking Bad/Better call Saul

Saul Goodman

General Dating HCs🤍🩶🕸️

Fake Dating to Lovers🤍🩶🌾

Lingerie 🩶🖤🪻🌾

Cuddle HC's 🤍🌾

Jessie Pinkman

Nacho Varga

Lalo Salamanca

Mortal Kombat

Kung Lao

Dating HCs 🤍🩶🕸️

Face Sitting🩶🖤🌾🕸️

Johnny cage

Face Sitting🩶🖤🪻🌾

Kenshi Takahashi

Reptile/Syzoth

Radian

Liu Kang

Hellsing

Alucard

American Psycho

Patrick Bateman

Creampie 🩶🖤🪨🌾

Complimenting his beauty

Working with Patrick

Big Businessman Reader

Fight club

Jack/ The narrator

Tyler Durden

Dating HCs 🕸️🩶

Scott pilgrim vs the world/takes off

Scott Pilgrim

Wallace Wells

Lucas Lee

Todd Ingran

Nu Carnival

Eiden

Aster

Morvay

Yakumo

Edmond

Quincy

Kuya

Garu

Blade

Dante

Rei

Other

Oral Fixation Bruce Banner 🩶🪻🌾

Vampire Midas Fortnite🩶🪻🌾

Hol Horse 🌾

Mike Schmidt with an Insomniac Reader🌾

Monster Fucking with Postal Dude🩶🖤🪨🌾

Ryo Asuka with Affectionate Devilman 🤍🕸️

Clingy Reader with Gyro Zeppeli 🌾

Hugging Miles Edgeworth🕸️🤍🌾

Akira Fudo with a himbo bf

[yolowritter]

So I watched Legally Blonde 1 & 2

and I have a very simple question. How in the name of Ao3 itself has nobody written a fic where Elle Woods meets Saul Goodman??? Unironically how did we not think to put this on the internet yet? Two of the most beloved laywer characters in fiction and nobody said "hey, let's throw these two in a room together!" Or better yet, "hey, let's have them work on the same case!" Like, tax fraud or something! Listen, the American legal system confuses me to point of braincell malfuction, but I am extremely tempted to try and write something with them meeting eachother! If anybody's got ideas, takes, or hcs, please let me know! Let's brainstorm together! Also, Legally Blonde is officially the most American thing ever, because Elle Woods and her can-do attitude manage to do something more impossible than beating the Devil in a fiddling contest. Getting politicians to care about animal rights! Yes, I loved the movies. Mean Girls is next on my watchlist.

[slamminslamminmcgill]

random thoughts... saul fingering you while hes on call with someone ... placing his hand tightly over your mouth to shut you up ... dhdjhejshrntg..f..g.. getting bent over that damn desk and him taking his tie off to choke you with it ...

>:333

combining w/ these

anatomical terms:

"We're sorry we missed you! Saul Goodman and Associates is out to lunch. Leave your name and phone number at the tone, and we will return your call before the end of the business day. Thank you!"

If anyone were to contact the office between 1-2PM, Monday-Friday, that's the message they would be greeted with. Guaranteed. That was when Saul took his lunch break. During that time, he'd eat out and get whatever he was craving: burgers, Mexican, Thai, you. That last one was his favorite.

You were laying down flat against his desk, legs dangling over the edge, with Saul nestled between them as he ate you out. Your hand grasped at strands of his thinning hair and guided his movements. He appreciated the help, but he didn't need it. He knew what he was doing, and what he was doing was a great job.

Hs firm hands and thin lips brought you up to the precipice of an orgasm. You begged for release in the soundproof office. "Saul... Saul, please... so... so close... God, fuck, please... Please!"

Surprisingly, the next thing you heard was not your own voice shrieking in ecstasy, but that of a telephone screeching for attention. You both froze in place, your climax shot down and reduced to rubble.

Saul pulled off of you and groaned, his mouth quite literally dripping wet. "Son of a bitch..." He stood up, brushed himself off, and leaned over you to hit the intercom button. "Francesca! What time is it?"

A flat, no-nonsense voice came through the other side. "2:04" was all it had to say.

"Oops! Sorry, lost track of time there. Thanks HT!"

"Don't call me tha-"

Click.

Saul silenced her dissent by releasing the button. He sat back in his chair and grabbed the ringing phone, one of many piled up in his drawer. Holding the cell in one hand, he beckoned you over and slapped his thigh with the other. A silent cue for you to take your seat.

You slid off the desk and propped yourself on his lap. He flipped the phone open and finagled it between his shoulder and his ear to keep both of his hands free. "Thank you for calling Saul Goodman! What can I do for ya?" He answered with perfect poise and nonchalance as he wrapped his arms around you and groped your chest.

The voice on the other end was frantic, low, and gravelly. You didn't hear specific words, just tone. Saul rolled his eyes as it spoke, lazily dragging one of his hands lower and lower, until it rested between your legs. "I see... That sounds very troubling." He answered with mock sympathy as he pressed his fingers inside you again.

You threw your head back and moaned, probably for a fraction of a second before Saul slapped his hand over your mouth. "Quiet. You just sit back, relax, and let me handle this, okay? I don't need your input."

The party on the other line must have heard something, because Saul's response was more anxious. "Oh! Nothing, nothing, don't worry. Now, let me check my schedule and I'll see where I can fit you in." He twisted and turned his fingers inside you, stretching you out, probably making sure you could fit him in. "Hm... looks like it's gonna be a tight squeeze..." He emphasized those words by pushing up into your g-spot and making your legs tremble, "...buuut I can get you in tomorrow at 4. Would that work for you, Walt?"

His voice stopped for a moment to let "Walt" speak; his fingers didn't do the same. Regardless of who "Walt" was and what he needed, it wasn't as important as this. At least, to you two it wasn't. "Walt" was shouting into the phone like he might burst a blood vessel.

Saul replied incredulously at the mysterious figure's behavior. "What?! Absolutely not! I have a waiting room packed full of clients who need to see me just as much as you do! I'm not your little callboy!" He leaned in close to whisper in your ear. "You on the other hand..."

He turned his attention back to the petulant voice shouting in his ear. "Y'know what? I'm done talking about this. Mr. White, I'll see you at 4PM tomorrow and not a moment sooner." He took his hand off your mouth to snap the flip phone shut.

"Sorry about that, sweetheart, now..." He pumped his fingers even faster, priming you for another release. "Let's get back to the task at hand."

[lanceappreciationblog]

Mod, do you have any funny Lance hcs with Clair?

Yes! Of course! I love these two!

Despite being cousins, I love imagining Lance and Clair having a typical goofy sibling dynamic because they deserve to have a fun life.

The two have their own separate housing but sometimes, (ESPECIALLY Clair) loves to drop by the other's place to crash on their couch and eat the food in their fridge.

Despite not seeming like the type, Lance loves to pick on Clair for being shorter than him. Clair hates this. This may or may not be the reason why she wears heels.

Clair has an ongoing bet with Lance about who will get a significant other first. Lance could care less about rushing into that sort of thing and truthfully Clair just wants to see who's the poor soul Lance will end up with.

They love pointing at ugly Pokemon and saying "that's you" to each other.

L: My Dragonite is stronger C: Well, my mine's prettier.

Lance, very hesitantly, comes to Clair for fashion advice and as a prank gives Lance the worst, I'm talking Saul Goodman suit levels of unprofessional, outfit for one of his league meetings and Lance was unaware of why the Elites were raising eyebrows at him that day. Never again.

The two often get comments about how they "look nothing alike" and Clair is always ready to answer with a confident "Good."

[maxwellhauskaffee]

I love Spamtenna!! It's one of my favorites toxic ships especially because of it's dynamic...regarding the toxic ships I also saw that you had an hc about Devil and KD's dynamic where their relationship was not healthy at all...an example of this was your artwork, how would you describe both toxic ships and their contrasts in more detail?

It's interesting because while Spamblue is my primary ship for various reasons, the more I think about Spamtenna, the less I see it as a romantic or sexual ship and more as a game of mental mindgames.

Both Devildice and Spamtenna center humiliation kink at the forefront, lol. The difference is that Devildice is more private and physical in its exploration of humiliation and abuse, whereas Spamtenna is (slightly) more public and mental.

I'm not sure what their canonical relationship is, so I can’t formulate too much. For all I know, Tenna could’ve been a show host or some kind of network provider who took contracts for commercial spots on his network and noticed Spamton due to his rising fame.

Real-life advertisers have to contract for timeslots and airtime. Certain slots are more expensive due to more viewers, as is the length of the commercial. Spamton, working for the then-shady company Cungadero, had low production quality and short ad runs; think Saul Goodman-style commercials. But as he gained fame and became more lucrative, TV stations began seeking him out and even fighting to have them as their primary clients.

Tenna, being the best in his field, won the barter for Spamton. At first, I imagine he’d be charming, but over time would reveal a more controlling side that Spamton didn’t like. Not wanting to forgo his fortune, though, Spamton obliges. Even things like constant reshoots and rehearsals that caused schisms in his personal life were things he'd consent to.

Blue, aka Emil in my fic, likes Spamton for who he is and constantly reminds him of this throughout their time dating. But as he begins seeing less of him while noticing drastic physical and personality changes, he grows concerned. This causes tension in their relationship since Spamton doesn’t like how he looks and is very prone to outside pressure to change concerning that.

My headcanon is that Spamton is an albino. His outlook on his appearance is inspired by an albino relative who experienced hatred for how she looked and was heavily stigmatized by her mother and society as a whole. I'm similar to Blue in that I never saw it as a negative difference (it's not) nor thought of it much when interacting with that person. They were there from my birth and a norm to me.

In any case, these changes start off with little things as all grooming does. Tenna claims that Spamton looks "too nerdy" and "creepy" because of his giant glasses and his white hue. Since Cyber City is heavily inspired by Japanese culture of the 80s and 90s, the color white carries older associations with despair and death, though it has different meanings depending on context.

In my interpretation, Spamton's "Big Shot" persona uses the colors red (authority / strength), black (formality / masculinity), and gold (wealth / joy) in his attire as a way to reframe his white plumage in a more positive light. This transformation was requested by Tenna, assuming Tenna is the one directing Spamton in canon. Tenna also pressures Spamton into wearing dark-mahogany contacts to hide his "bloodshot eyes," despite the pain they cause, and insists Spamton dye his crest and eyebrows black to "better frame his face". Below's an example from a sticker sheet I made, which can be bought here - huehue ADVERTISING.

I wrote a post about this elsewhere, but Spamton's relationship with people such as Tenna would be like Devil's Advocate. That conflict of retaining his fame or relationships with loved ones, specifically Blue.

Devildice doesn't have that conflict of retaining loved ones, as Dice has lost all of his in my headcanon. He already sold his soul to the devil. Spamton, however, while signing a contract with Tenna and the "mysterious benefactor" who I don't think is either Tenna or Mike, hasn't quite sold his soul. At least not in a literal sense. He's trying to have his cake and eat it too until his relationship with Blue and their friends completely collapses, and THEN he loses himself in his work at the peak of his fame.

Tenna's not overtly abusive like Devil nor is he physically so. As a TV personality, he's smooth wish his lingo and more subtle with his actions. After all, all eyes are on him. His profession and being a literal TV man would make him all too aware of how he's perceived by others. But his level of abuse through control is still extremely present. It's just covert. Hope my response wasn't too long!

[pumpkinsy0]

Breaking bad au and the outsiders HCs?!? (If that makes sense...)

YAHOOOO IM FINALLY ASKED THIS LET GOOOOO

before i start, this wont 100% follow breaking bad’s storyline, im taking some artistic liberty here lmao

•the main ones u should know is this: curly is jesse, darry is walter, soda is skylar, pony is walter jr, OBVIOUSLY darry and soda r NOT married, they r BROTHERS, dont b WEIRD🙎🏽‍♀️

•darry got into selling drugs bc the economy is SHIT and inflation is CRAZY, and his jobs arent too stable, curly found darry out bc tim was talking about “some new guy selling on my side”, curly caught him, and promised to keep it a secret cause hey, gotta do what u gotta do man

•idk if yall knew but actually jesse was supposed to die from a drug sale gone wrong and LETS JUST SAYYYY, curly DID get shot, HOWEVERRRR he didnt die, but darry did have to bring him home quickly and patch him up, he hides it by saying that he saw it happen but doesnt explain it further

•now ik what ur thinking, “why didnt u make pony andrea or jane” AND THATS BC, no,,,,i dont want pony dead,,,,,hes still a love interest and maybe they dont REALLY get together but theres somethin there!! think if em like a heavily implied ship!!

•darry HATES it 1) its pony x curly, lmao 2) but also bc he feels like thats “mixing personal with business life” and it would put them in danger, but whateverrrrrr curlys still goin and just does it behind curlys back, HOWEVER, curlys still had his love??? interest before pony

•now u COULD see tim as being like saul goodman, out of all the characters in the outsiders, hes DEFINITELY that “i know a guy who knows a guy” guy, and he knows his way in the us justice system lmao, and no!!! he doesnt know curlys in on it, darry didnt tell tim bc stupid emotional conflict, so tim thinks darrys a one man army here that hes backing up

•i actually do think darry and curly would have that same relationship walter and jesse had, they could fight yea but at the end of the day they would defend each other, they even get closer and darry sees curly as a “im keeping u locked up in the basement, kinda 3rd brother” !!!

•for soda and darry in this au, so soda isnt 100% sure WHAT is going on, but he sure is suspicious bc he notices small things about darry, hes seen darry smoke a little bit, hes a lil more shifty about whats going on at work bc he doesnt see darry outside working like he usually would, he notices hes spending a litttlleeeee bit more for new things, small things like that

•but when he DOES find out, BOY is their relationship strained, its like soda understands that hes doing this for the family but at the same time its like, ur putting us and urself in danger man its not worth it, and theyd clash over that, not in front of pony, but pony can tell somethings up, nobodys tellin him

•curly still gets traumatized in those stupid lil shirts like jesse❤️

[the-winner-takes-it-saul]

hi this is the blog where I catalogue all my favorite characters and my favorite art of them bc my main blog is so disorganized.

Main is @axe-cution .

ya ❤️

I share always

Yes I know I was the Clint moss guy but plsssss do not send any asks about Clint moss Ty

Selfship list PROPER ! :

- Nanu (Pokemon) (hc her as trans-fem, she/any)

- Looks to the Moon (Rainworld) (hc her as trans-masc, he/she)

- Saul Goodman (BRBA/BCS) (have not finished breaking bad yet and haven’t gotten to BCS no spoilers ty)

- Dr. Yado (LISARPG)

- Mr. Game and Watch (G&W)

[paul-newmans-sauce]

i forget which episode this was, but when jimmy and kim were talking about replacing howards toilet paper with a shitty roll and saying “hit him where he lives” did he basically just say howard has ibs or something ?? ibs rep from howard himself ?? 

[terabyte-teddybear]

Hiiii friend <333 can I request some Saul Goodman icons?? Maybe trans or nonbinary pride icons but im not sure how possible that is so really it’s up to u what kind of icons u make :3 /nm /lh

sorry this took me so long to get to, i hope u like them :3 ftu with credit!