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Schedule drug test for substance abuse professional

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Schedule drug test for substance abuse professional

categories: #DrugTesting tags: #DrugTestForSubstanceAbuseProffessional, #IndependentUrineDrugTest, #PersonalDrugTest, #SapDrugTest, #ScheduleDrugTest

[absurdthirst]

Dieter's Daughter {Dieter Bravo x F!Reader}

Rating: Explicit

Word Count: 13.7k

Warnings: Dad!Dieter, mentions of drug use, unplanned pregnancies, freaking out, mentions of foster care, anxiety, lactation kink, babies, domestic bliss, falling in love, sudden marriage proposals, Dieter being a sap, adult breast feeding, oral sex (female receiving), face riding, vaginal sex, pregnancy

Comments: When a baby is dropped off on Dieter's doorstep, he is completely out of his element and doesn't know what to do. Attending a single mother support group meeting, he finds you. Begging you to become a nanny to his daughter.

Co-written with @storiesofthefandomlovers

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|| MasterList || Dieter Bravo MasterList ||

Click Keep Reading only if you have read the Rating and Warnings and understand the warnings may not be complete to avoid listing spoilers. As AO3 says 'creator chooses not to use warnings'. You also agree that you're the right age to be consuming anything here.

It takes several minutes for the sounds of the doorbell peeling insistently to break through Dieter’s nearly catatonic state. Too much booze and too many pills are the result of another day of discontent and wishing that there was something other than numbness of life for him. Leaving him grumbling when one eye pops open and he groans when the cotton mouth and headache hits him. “Go away.” He huffs, knowing that there is no way that whoever is at the damn door would hear him all the way in his bedroom. Hell, the only reason he hears the doorbell is because it’s wired to the sound system in the house. Again the bell rings and like the dead rising from the grave, Dieter drags himself out of the safety and comfort of his bed. “Fuck! I’m coming! I’m coming!” The bathrobe he had tossed down last night is put over his boxers and he shuffles towards the stairs as fast as his lethargic body can go.

When Dieter opens the door, he’s shocked to see a woman standing there holding a baby. “Can I help you?” He asks, rubbing his eyes, and she snorts.

“You don’t remember me, do you?” She asks and Dieter squints, “am I supposed to?” 

She laughs humorlessly, “I shouldn’t be surprised, you could barely remember my name that night. I was just amazed that a big actor wanted to fuck me. Remember me? That cocktail waitress from the club you took home about ten months ago?” She says and Dieter scratches his neck. 

“Listen lady, I sleep with a lot of people. It’s hard to remember them all.” He admits with zero qualms. 

“Wow. You’re a fucking asshole. Anyway, I guess the condom broke because congrats, you’re a daddy. It’s a girl. Her name is Rosie. Her birth certificate is in the bag.” She holds the baby out towards him and his eyes widen, looking down at the baby bag in the ground.

”What? I- what the fuck?” He looks bewildered before he starts to laugh. “Good one. Real funny. What do you want? Money?” He scoffs and she shakes her head, tears in her eyes. 

“No. No. I need you to take her. I can’t afford her and I- I didn’t want her. When I found out - I was fucking eight months pregnant so it was too late to get rid of her and I can’t work so I can’t pay for my place. I can’t keep her. You gotta take her. She will be better off with you.” She says and pushes the baby into Dieter’s arms. 

He scrambles to hold the baby, not wanting to drop her and the woman immediately sprints off towards her car. “Hey! Wait! You can’t just- I don’t know how to look after a baby! I need you to - hey. Where the fuck- get back here!” He yells as she squeals off of his driveway and he curses himself for not fixing the gate yet. “Shit.” He hisses. He didn’t even get her name. Looking down at the baby, he sighs and knows he has to find her mom. He can’t be a daddy. He can barely look after himself. 

No, first thing is a damn DNA test and then he’s gonna find that bitch and give her back her baby. He’s gotta call the police after he cleans up his counters from the coke powder. “Fuckkkkk.” He groans, knowing his quiet day just got a whole lot busier.

****

“If we take her, Mr. Bravo, she’s just going to go into a state home. An orphanage.” Dieter frowns and wraps his arms around his chest, nervous for having the fucking cops in his house. Paranoid they were going to find the baggie of Coke he just remembered was in the little box next to his car keys. “You are listed on the birth certificate.” 

Snatching the paper from the officer he squints at it. “How the fuck is that legal?” He demands. “That means anyone could put me down as the father of their kid.” 

The officer shuffles, clearly uncomfortable and slightly in awe of being in the actor’s presence. “That’s for the courts to decide. Look,” he lowers his voice and looks around. “I don’t think you understand how bad the system is for babies.” He tells Dieter seriously. “Just- keep the baby with you, at least until the DNA tests come back. That way you don’t have to fight to get her back when she is yours. You already said you might have slept with this woman. Stranger things have happened.” 

Dieter huffs, upset by the idea of the tiny little human being in an orphanage. Even if she doesn’t look anything like him. He had found diapers and a can of formula in the bag that the mother had left with him but that’s it. He has nothing to take care of a child. “What am I supposed to do? I don’t know shit about kids.” He demands, making the officer chuckle. 

“Hire a nanny.” The officer suggests, smirking. “Isn’t that what you Hollywood types do?”

Dieter knows he can’t just ship the kid off. She’s so tiny and vulnerable. He can’t do it, even he’s not that big of an asshole. He will call his assistant to get a nanny in today. “Listen, do you, uh, know how much formula to use?” He asks the cop who nods and walks over to the counter to show Dieter. 

“One scoop for every two ounces of water. Get baby water but bottled will have to work for today. So four ounces, two scoops. And shake. After she is finished, shift her to your shoulder and gently pat her back to get her to burp.” He says and Dieter nods. 

“How much does she need?” Dieter asks and the cop chuckles, “she’s gonna be hungry a lot. I remember mine at that age. Endless bottles. Be sure to wash them thoroughly.” He says and pats Dieter on the shoulder and makes his way towards the front door of the Sherman Oaks mansion.

“Fuck.” Dieter groans, rubbing his cheek when the police leave and the baby starts to cry. He knows she must be hungry so he fumbles to open the container, grabbing the bottle to fill it with bottled water and putting two scoops in. “I’m coming.” He says, struggling to do the bottle up, and he curses again as he walks over to carefully scoop the baby up. “How do I-?” He struggles to get her to suck on the bottle and sighs in relief when she stops wailing and gulps down the milk.

Dieter holds the baby awkwardly, trying to remember how from that role a few years ago. The baby had been a prop doll, but they had shown him how to hold it. “Your name’s Rosie, huh?” He asks, looking down at the infant. According to the birth certificate, she’s only two months old. “I’m Dieter, but you don’t talk so why am I telling you that?” He huffs, but the baby gurgles around the nipple of the bottle and it makes him grin. “Did you like that?” He asks, lifting a brow. Apparently he’s a natural with kids. 

The baby grunts and the grin immediately slides into a frown. “What’s that?” He asks, feeling something moving. “What are you doing?” Instead of sucking down the milk, the baby is grunting and straining and Dieter stares in horror as the smell starts to reach his nose. “Oh shit! You shit!” He groans in disgust.

The baby starts to cry, unhappy with a full diaper, and Dieter is reaching for his phone. 

“Hello?” His assistant answers and Dieter is panicking. 

“I need you here right now. I need help.” 

Johan, his assistant, frowns, “is that- is that a baby?” He asks and Dieter groans, “get here now. And call a nanny service!” He demands and hangs up. “What do I do?” He asks the baby, shifting to lay her down on a towel so she doesn’t get shit on his expensive rug. “I- shit. You - fuck. That’s disgusting.” He groans and pulls his phone out. “YouTube! I’ll try YouTube.” He looks up ‘how to change a diaper’ and grabs the baby bag.

Dieter watches the video, studying it intently as he keeps a hand on the baby’s stomach. “Looks easy.” He frowns at the squirming baby. “But the doll wasn’t moving.” He sets the phone down beside the bag so he can see it and bites his lip as he tries to figure out the snaps on the onesie she’s in. “Holy shit.” He huffs, amazed at how easy it unsnaps. “I need this in a fucking adult version.” Wrinkling his nose when the smell gets even worse, he groans. “Wheeeeew, God you stink.” He nearly gags and pulls his shirt up over his nose. “What did you eat?”

Trying to plug his nose, he follows the YouTube video, wiping the poop off of her skin after rolling up the dirty diaper and putting it in the diaper bag. Anyone watching would think Dieter is dealing with a bomb. He gags when he pushes the wipes into the bag after cleaning her up and he grabs the rash cream, placing some on her bottom where the video details he should. He curses the new diaper, trying to figure out what way is the front until he sees it says “back” on it and he pulls it tight on her tiny body before he clips her onesies back into place. “Shit. That - that wasn’t too bad.” He murmurs, breathing in the fresh air and she hiccups, looking up at him with wide eyes.

“You’re kind of cute.” Dieter murmurs. “In a weird, ‘you don’t look like me’ kind of way.” He frowns when she grins at him, kicking her feet. “You’re weird.” He huffs, but she just waves her arms at him and squeals. Is she his? After all this time, did he finally fuck up and procreate? His mind spins and he wishes he remembers what the woman looks like better than he does but it had been early (for him) and he had just woken up. “We will have to find you someone who knows what they are doing kiddo.”

**** 

“What did you do?” Johan accuses Dieter who shakes his head, holding the baby in his arms and he looks at her, unable to deny that she looks a little like Dieter. 

“I don’t know man. Some woman, I- Jesus. She said I fucked her and don’t even remember her. I’m waiting for the nurse to come for the DNA test.” Dieter confesses, knowing he has to be sure before he does anything.

“Oh my God, Dieter.” She rolls her eyes and immediately steps closer to the baby, unable to resist seeing her up close. “This is why you said you needed a nanny?” 

Dieter nods and rocks his body as the baby’s eyes start to drift closed. “I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing.” He huff, looking around the house that is definitely not baby proof. “I don’t have anything. I need-” He shakes his head. “I don’t know what the fuck I need. More diapers? That formula?” He nods towards the diaper bag. “She didn’t leave me shit for this baby.” He growls, pissed off at the poor planning of that woman. Who just abandons their baby with someone they didn’t know? 

“Let me make a list and we can get what we need for her.” Johan says, knowing Dieter will not know anything that he will need. 

“I need help. And stuff. Like now.” Dieter says, feeling the need to use but he can’t since he’s responsible for a fucking baby now.

Johan nods and bites his lip. “I’ve got a call into a nanny service. They are going to send someone over today.” He knows Dieter will be relieved. “Maybe she can help us with what we need.”

“Let’s get her. I need help. I- shit. I don’t even have a crib or anything. I need you to go out. Take my card and get all the baby shit from the best store there is in town.” He orders, wanting the baby to have the best even if she isn’t his. She’s cute and she deserves a good start in this world. “I need - shit - I have no idea what I’m doing. Please help me.” Dieter begs, the baby falling asleep against his chest and he looks down at her, her lips pouting as she sucks on the pacifier he found in the bag.

Johan grimaces and nods, aware that he has even less experience with babies than Dieter does. “I’ll be back.” The other man promises, quickly making his way towards the door and out of the house. He had no clue what the hell to do for his boss, he’s gotten himself in a mess this time. As much as he wants to claim he doesn’t know that baby is his, it is. Dieter Bravo is a father.

****

“It’s nice to meet you. I’ve always been such a fan of your work.” The woman gushes. Dieter can barely remember her name. Violet, Vivian, or something like that. She seems nice enough and her qualifications from the service are good. He doesn’t really know what he’s looking for in a nanny except he desperately needs help. He’s waiting on the DNA results to come in but the little baby is cute and she listens to him rambling without complaints.

Viola looks around the house and wonders how the hell Dieter Bravo became an overnight father. “You must attend parenting classes.” She insists after Dieter finally runs out of steam and shuts up. “There is one I can sign you up for. It’s for new parents and you qualify.” She chuckles, shaking her head. “They have a meeting in two days, I can see about getting you halfway set up.

“What? No. I don’t need a parenting group.” Dieter scoffs and Viola raises her eyebrows. 

“Respectful sir, I think you do.” She offers him a wry smile when the baby starts to cry in his arms. 

“I’m hopeless, aren’t I?” He sighs, trying to rock Rosie and he is struggling to calm her. 

“Here. Can I-?” Viola asks and Dieter practically shoves the baby into her arms. 

“You’re hired.” He declares when Rosie calms down and the crying stops. He can’t do this alone.

“Mr. Bravo,” Viola frowns and shakes her head. “I’m sorry if you misunderstood. I am here temporarily.” She explains. “I have already signed a contract with another family. I came today because it was an emergency.” She wonders if he had heard anything she had said when she arrived, he had looked frazzled but she thought she had been clear. 

“What? No! You seem like such a nice lady and Rosie likes you. Please. I’ll pay more. I’ll do anything to get you to stay.” He pleads, “name your price. I’ll fucking pay it. Please!” He pouts, eyes wide and pleading. 

Viola shakes her head, “I’m so sorry. I can’t get out of the contract. I’ll help you as much as I can. Johan said you need help learning the basics so I’ll show you the basics and take care of Rosie while I can but you’re going to have to learn what to do.” She says, knowing it’s going to be tough.

“I can’t do this.” Dieter wails, knowing life as he knows it is over. Without someone here, he going to fuck it up. “Please, please, you have to stay.” He begs, making Viola shake her head. 

“I am here for one week, Mr. Bravo. Then it will be up to you to find someone to help you care for Rosie. Now, let me show you how to bathe your daughter.”

****

“She’s yours.” Dieter exhales shakily as Johan announces the DNA results. 

“Shit. I- I have a daughter.” He shakes his head and looks over at Rosie who is asleep in her bassinet. “What am I gonna do?” Dieter asks as reality sets in. He has a child that he’s responsible for and Viola is only here for two more days. “She’s - she’s so tiny and I’m gonna fuck it up. She’s gonna get fucked up because of me.” He starts to panic now that reality has hit.

“You are going to go to the parenting class tonight and we are going to continue to look for a nanny.” Johan tells Dieter practically. He’s been surprised that Dieter hasn’t done as many drugs as he normally does, even smoking weed outside because of the baby. “So far all the services I’ve called don’t have anyone available until next year.” He shakes his head. “Apparently it was baby season this year.”

Dieter groans, covering his face with his hands and dragging them down his cheeks. “I have pre-production for the movie coming up in a few weeks. I can’t take her with me to a table read.” He whines and Rosie shifts in her sleep, making Dieter’s heart melt when the movement catches his attention and he looks over. “Fine. I’ll go to the parenting class. Maybe…maybe someone can help me find a nanny there.” He says, determined to find help. 

****

Dieter walks into the church hall, surprised he hasn’t burst into flames. He hasn’t been to church since he was a kid. His mama used to drag him on a Sunday and when he became famous at ten years old, he managed to bail on church because he was working. He sits down in a seat, noticing how all the other attendees are women. Rosie is asleep in her carrier for now and he has the diaper bag at his feet. “Welcome ladies and - oh. Hi, we have a new member.” An older woman smiles at Dieter, “welcome to the single mom support group.”

“Oh, uh, I thought it was-“ Dieter falters for a moment, panicking about being kicked out of the group. “I thought this was a single parent support group.” He explains, shuffling. “I just- uh, the mother of the child- my child- I just got the DNA test back, dropped her off on my door with no warning.” He rambles, trying to explain why he needs to stay. “I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing.” He confesses, nearly sounding defeated.

“It’s okay. It’s okay. You can stay.” A few of the moms recognize Dieter and he looks exhausted. Rosie had kept him up half of the night since Viola has been weaning him off of her help, and he glances around. 

“I’m sorry to - shit. I can go.” He says and you are sitting next to him. 

“No, stay. It’s okay. We are all here to help each other.” Your own son, three months old, is whining and you sigh, pulling your tank top down and unclipping your bra to breastfeed him.

Dieter’s eyes widen at the sight of your breast and he can’t deny his cock twitches a little at the idea of drinking down some milk. Shit, when did that kink happen? “I appreciate it. I have no clue what I’m doing.” He admits again and all the women laugh, “none of us do. It’s instinct and a lot of books.” One giggles, “and Google.”

“I didn’t even know.” Dieter moans, shaking his head. “It was- it was a one night stand.” He feels bad about that, not even able to tell Rosie about his relationship with her mom when she gets older. “I’m trying to hire a nanny but all of them are booked up.” He shakes his head. “I don’t want to fuck her up. She’s so tiny. Two months old.”

“What’s her name?” You ask him, looking at the little girl asleep in her carrier. 

“Rosie.” He says with a soft smile, it’s hard to not love the little girl now that he knows she’s his. He wants the best for her, even if she’s stuck with a manic mess like him. “This is Oliver.” You gesture to the baby now asleep on your breast.

Dieter smiles and tries not to notice the grunting sounds the kid is making. Feeling guilty because he knows that he would be making the exact same sounds the kid is if he was sucking down milk from your tit. “That’s nice.” He offers. 

“So what is your name?” The woman in charge smiles fondly at him and he’s surprised no one recognizes him. 

“Uh, Dieter.” He offers, curling his shoulders slightly. “Dieter Bravo.”

“Welcome Dieter.” Several of the women say to him with a smile. 

“So do you have any questions?” Julia, the group leader asks. 

“Where the fuck do I begin?” He replies dramatically, making all the women chuckle. 

“Well, we are here to help each other so might as well start.”

“So my first question. So is their shit always gonna be that black color?” Dieter shakes his head, making a face as he remembers the last diaper he had changed. 

All the women laugh. “No that won’t last for much longer since she’s three months old.” 

Dieter rolls his eyes gratefully. “Oh thank God.” He chuckles. Looking over at you again. “You said your son is two months old? Is he sleeping all night? Is that something that she has to get used to?”

You shake your head, “he isn’t sleeping through the night yet. I breastfeed so he wakes me up every couple of hours. It takes a while for them to sleep through the night. Like six months or so. Have you read any baby books?” You ask and he shakes his head. “Oh you must read - you know what. I’ll send you a list. What’s your number?” You ask and the women all giggle, making you fluster. “I mean, to help. We have babies close in age. It’s good to have help.”

“Do you need a job?” Dieter blurts out, wondering why he hadn’t thought of it before. “I mean- if your husband doesn’t mind.” He corrects himself, forgetting it was a single mother’s group. “I'm just- I’ve got to start pre-production on the next movie and it’s going to be crazy and you seem like you’re perfect. You handle your baby so easily.” His eyes are wide and pleading, begging you to say yes.

Your eyes widen, "I- um, oh wow. A job?" 

The other women all nod, telling Dieter about your history as a teacher and how you know CPR. You fluster, knowing you need a job. Your maternity leave ended two weeks ago and instead of letting you come back to work, your job had fired you. Between losing your job and your landlord chasing you up on rent, you know this is too good to turn down. "I'm not married and um, what job do you have in mind?"

“Nanny.” He jumps immediately on your question. Knowing that it’s not a ‘no’. “I’ll pay you really well and you can- can you live there? I mean, I can have odd hours and you can stay at my place. You and Oliver.” He makes sure to include your son. “I have a big house. In Sherman Oaks.” As if that would sweeten the deal. “Help me with Rosie and teach me how to be a dad. How to look after her. I don’t expect you to do it all.” He clarifies, having already gotten used to the idea of being a ‘girl dad’. He’s watched a few Tik Toks about it and it looks cool.

You know it sounds too good to be true. A job and a place to live with your son. “I think we need to sit down and talk this through properly. You don’t even know me. Don’t you wanna do a background check?” You ask, knowing you’d be doing that if you were hiring someone to live in your house. “We have a lot to discuss.” You bite your lip and look around the room to see the other moms nodding to encourage you.

“Yeah. Yeah.” Dieter nods seriously. “My agent will have that done. Plus the NDA you would have to sign.” He’s grateful you are even thinking about it. “But don’t worry. Most of the tabloid stuff is bullshit. I’m not that bad.” He promises with a quick, charming grin. “We can hammer out the details after this, right?”

“Uh, sure.” You nod and Dieter winks at you before turning back to the women, their own babies in their arms and you know this is too good an opportunity to turn down. “You wanna go get a coffee?” You ask Dieter after Oliver is in his stroller and you look at Rosie who is still asleep, unaware of her father trying to hire her a new nanny. 

“As long as it’s quiet.” He says and you frown, “uh, sure. You said you are going into pre-production so does that mean you are an actor?” You ask, unaware of if he’s famous.

Dieter stares at you for a moment, wondering if you are just trying to play coy but you are just looking at him curiously. “Yeah, uh, I am.” He admits, finding it refreshing that someone on this planet doesn’t know who he is or have any expectations of him. “I normally do two or three movies a year, depending on how long they take to film or whatever.” He struggles with the carrier and the door, holding it open for you on the other side. “Gotta get one of those.” He tells himself, eyeing your stroller.

“We can make a list of what you’ll need. I’m guessing you have the basics but there’s so much stuff.” You sigh, knowing it’s not always been in your reach but someone like him could buy it all. 

“A list sounds good. Coffee?” He suggests, gesturing to the small coffee shop down the street and you nod. 

“Sounds good. I desperately need one. He kept me up all night. He was hungry last night and wouldn’t settle unless he was against my breast.”

Dieter keeps his dirty thoughts to himself, but he doesn’t blame the kid. He would love to sleep with a nipple in his mouth too. “We will make sure to get you an extra shot of espresso.” He promises, carrying the car seat and diaper bag as he walks alongside you. “I’m being serious. About the job, I mean.” He tells you. “I have tried every nanny service in the greater L.A. area with no luck, although I’m on their waitlist.” He sighs and shuffles the carrier when his arm gets tired in one position. “I have an in-law suite you and Oliver can use, if you want a little more privacy than just sleeping upstairs.” He knows he sounds desperate, because he is desperate. Johan knows less than he does about babies and has zero interest in watching the kid while he is busy.

“Let’s sit down with the babies and then we can order.” You suggest and he nods, guiding you over to a table in the back. Rosie is waking up and he panics when she starts to cry. “Oh hello gorgeous.” You murmur, leaning down to look at his daughter and Dieter is fumbling to get the bottle from the bag to make her formula. You sigh, sensing he needs help and you unbuckle the baby, Oliver asleep as you cradle Rosie, her cries settling a little and you stand up, rocking her and you reach for the formula Dieter has, a whole damn container, and work fast on a bottle. “My sister has kids. I used to babysit them.” You explain and work fast with one hand to prepare a bottle and bring it to her lips. “Here you go sweet pea.” You coo as she starts to gulp down the milk.

“You’re really good at this.” Dieter says in awe, watching you handle things so smoothly. “I’m just-I don’t know.” He sighs, feeling bad that he’s not good at this. 

“Babies sense the emotions around them.” You tell him quietly. “You panic, she’s going to become more frantic. Just talk to her while you are getting her bottle ready. Or have one already mixed up, ready to go.” You think about all the formulas that are already bottled and just need a nipple slapped on them. “We can find a routine that works for you.”

Dieter nods, “yes. Yes. God, please take the job. I need you.” He pleads and you shift Rosie into his arms, transferring the bottle to him. 

“I’ll take the job. On one condition.” You say, sitting back down and you rock Oliver’s stroller. 

“Anything.” Dieter vows. 

“You learn too. I don’t want you to just shove her into my arms at the first sign of difficulty. She’s your daughter. You need to know how to care for her, to bond with her. You can’t just hand her off and expect me to do it all. She needs to know her daddy.”

Dieter nods, knowing that he would do that if given the opportunity. “Okay.” He agrees. “I want you to help me become better at taking care of her.” He bites his lip and looks at you. “What do you want for pay?” He asks, listing off a number that the nanny services had given him. “Does that sound okay? Plus, you’ll have full use of the house. And a card for expenses. I don’t expect you to buy the diapers or wipes or any of that shit.”

Your eyes widen, it’s way more than you were making at your old job. Your landlord has been threatening you with eviction since you’re struggling to pay, and this almost seems like fate. “Wow. I- are you sure?” You ask him and he nods, “I’m absolutely sure.” 

You swallow and offer him a soft smile, “then I’m your new nanny.” He grins and your heart thumps in your chest at how handsome he is. “There’s something you gotta know though.” You sigh and Dieter nods, waiting for you to go on. “Oliver’s father. He - he died.” You feel yourself tearing up, “we - I was only a few months pregnant when we got into the car accident.  I didn’t even know I was pregnant at the time but Ollie- he- he died. We were- we were friends, friends with benefits and we got pregnant and he- he never got to meet his son.” You choke, the grief that’s consumed you threatens to take you again. He didn’t have any family left alive so Oliver would’ve been his only family.

“I’m sorry.” Dieter frowns, unsure of how to comfort someone about a death that meaningful but he feels like he should say something. “That is rough. Hopefully- hopefully this will turn into a good arrangement.” He offers with a small shrug, realizing that things could be worse. He can’t imagine what it would be like going through this alone. “After our coffee, do you want to come over? See the house?” He asks. “I can call my agent to draw up any kind of paperwork you want.”

You nod, sniffing to stop yourself from crying about Ollie. You loved him, he was your friend, but you were never in love with him. He had his problems and you had yours. It would’ve never worked. Oliver is here now and you have to be strong for him, to keep Ollie’s memory alive. “Yes. I- this is a lot but I want to change my life. I need a change. I want to work for you.” You say as the barista takes pity on you with the babies and comes over to take your order. “I’ll have a vanilla latte please.” You order and Dieter adds, “with an extra shot of espresso.”

After taking your orders, Rosie finishes her bottle and Dieter shifts to put her up on his shoulder to burp. “Hang on, you need a spit rag.” You insist, digging in your own diaper bag to produce one. 

“Huh,” Dieter huffs, “I just thought I was supposed to wear her puke until she stopped doing that.” He jokes, the stains on his shirt only partly from his daughter. 

“No, you always carry multiple burp clothes and changes of clothes, for both of you.” You tell him with a smile.

He nods, mentally taking notes. He has so much to learn from you to make sure his daughter is well looked after. He doesn’t want to fail at being a father. He wants her to know he did everything he could to be a good daddy. He knows you will be good for Rosie, for him too. He sips his coffee and watches you with Oliver, rocking his stroller, and he can see you’re a good mom. He feels comfortable with you. “Do you wanna come back to my place?” Dieter asks, realizing that’s the first time he’s asked that question without it being for sex or drugs

You bite your lip and look up at the frazzled, yet handsome man who is offering you a dream situation. A place to live and the ability to stay at home with your son while still earning money. You don’t know if you would ever get a better offer. “Yes.” You agree. “I’ll follow you? Maybe you can text me the address in case we get separated?” You want to look it up really quickly, just to make sure it’s a real place.

He nods, taking your number to text you his address. He is anxious for you to see the house, hoping you love it and it helps to get you to take the job. You strap Oliver into his car seat while Dieter does the same to Rosie and soon enough, you’re driving to his house.

“I, uh, I’ll ask the housekeeper to come in more than once a week.” Dieter offers, climbing out of his car as you do the same. He doesn’t want you to think that it’s all going to fall on you. “Oh, Johan told me about a diaper delivery service. All natural diapers? That’s better, right?” He asks, anxious about doing the right thing. He had read about the chemicals used in the nappies he currently has.

You smile at his anxiety, wanting the best for Rosie, and you know he’s going to be a good daddy once he gets his feet under him. “Johan?” You ask and Dieter nods, “my assistant. He’s - he is my lifeline.” Dieter confesses and you nod, understanding he lives a completely different life to you. He needs an assistant to manage his schedule. You take Oliver out of the car in his carrier and follow Dieter into the house, your eyes wide at the gorgeous home he owns. “This is - wow.” You exhale as you enter the grand property.

“Thank you.” Dieter shows you the bottom floor and opens the door to his study. “I have all this shit I don’t know what it’s for.” The room is filled with boxes of toys and jumpers, cribs and carriers. Johan had gone overboard but Dieter had wanted to make sure that he had everything he needed. Your eyes widen and he blushes, “I was trying my best.” 

You nod, understating he has struggled since Rosie was dropped on his doorstep. “We can get everything set up. Does she have a nursery?” You ask and he shakes his head, “she’s been in my room. I- I haven’t really slept. I’ve been trying to watch her sleep in case, you know.” 

You understand, knowing you stay awake watching Oliver breathing. It’s a lot of anxiety being a first time parent. “We will get her nursery set up and then you can keep her in your room if you want but then she has somewhere to nap and call her own.” You smile and rub his shoulder after you set Oliver down in his carrier, he’s asleep. “It’s gonna be fine.” You promise him, glancing around the beautiful living room. “It’s gonna need some baby proofing and, uh, that needs to go.” You gesture to the powder packet on the counter.

“Oh, I, uh-“ Dieter rushes forward and grabs the packet to sweep it off the counter and into his pocket. “I haven’t- that’ll be put away.” He promises, cursing himself for leaving it out. He hadn’t taken any lately, not since Rosie arrived because he’s too fucking scared of something happening to her while he’s bombed. “Sorry.” He hopes you don’t decide to leave him high and dry because of that. “Do you want to see the rooms you and Oliver could have?” He asks desperately.

You stop him, “I- I am taking the job but you won’t do drugs in this house with the babies. If something happened or they got hold of it - I couldn’t - no drugs in this house. Period. You wanna go get high somewhere else? Fine. But your daughter comes first, you understand?” You ask him, knowing you won’t risk your own son around that kind of bullshit.

Immediately nodding, Dieter understands what you are saying. “I haven’t- not since she’s arrived.” He confesses. “I’ve been too scared to even try in case something happens.” He’s not stupid enough to think he won’t do drugs anymore but he does want to be there for his daughter.

You nod, knowing it’s not ideal but it will have to do. As long as they aren’t kept in the house and he doesn’t do them around the children, it’s his business. You are just his employee. “Okay.” You pat his shoulder and he guides you to the guest suite. “Dieter…this is…wow.” You gasp at the massive room, “this is - this is a lot. Are you sure - there’s no other room you want me to have?” You ask, knowing this room is the size of your apartment.

“You need room for you and Oliver.” He shrugs, not wanting to say that he doesn’t have guests unless it was someone from a party. And he doubts he’s having those here anymore. “This way you have privacy and your own bathroom.” He knows that is important and figured this would be perfect. “And using another room for Oliver is okay too.” He doesn’t want to suggest the nursery can be shared, but he wouldn’t mind. “Will this work?”

You smile, reaching out to pat his arm, “this is more than enough, Dieter. It’s perfect.” You promise and he grins, pleased that you are happy. He sighs when Rosie starts to cry and Oliver follows suit, both babies waking up. “Come on daddy, let’s go feed the babies.”

He feels more confident with you beside him. Even if it’s just your presence reminding him that he should test the bottle on the inside of his wrist before popping the nipple in Rosie’s mouth while Oliver is greedily suckling at your breast for his own meal. “That wasn’t too bad.” He grins down at his daughter, eyes wide but slowly starting to close as she gulps down the bottle. “How often do you have to feed Oliver?” He asks, trying to keep his eyes on your face respectfully. You aren’t giving him a show.

“About every one and a half to two hours. Depends on when he’s hungry. He lets me know.” You chuckle and watch your son as his gulps turn into suckles which lead to him falling asleep against your breast. “It’s - it’s exhausting but he’s worth it.” You smile at Dieter who is rocking Rosie. “You’re getting better already. We will make a list of everything we need for you and, um, I guess I better go and pack.” You smile bashfully, knowing this is a big move but it’s what’s best for you and Oliver.

“Why don’t we hire someone to pack you?” Dieter asks with a frown. You have your hands full and he knows that it will take a lot to take care of your son and try to pack. “I’ll pay for it. I don’t mind. That way we can get the nursery set up.”

“Are you sure? I- I don’t know if you’re gonna find someone so late notice. I don’t have much. And I will need Oliver’s crib and -” 

You don’t get to finish because Dieter is pulling out his phone to call Johan and arrange for your things to be moved today. “Whatever it costs.” Dieter says and you swallow, knowing Dieter has more money than you could imagine if he can waste it like that. 

“Thank you.” You tell him, cradling Oliver who is fast asleep.

“It’s nothing.” Dieter waves away the thanks and looks down at Rosie as she finishes the last of her bottle. “Okay little girl, let’s get you to burp, and then maybe a nap?” He asks, grinning. “She has the manliest burps.” He brags, astounded that something so small could make such a racket. “I have the other cradle thingy if you want to lay your son down.”

“The bassinet?” You smirk and he shrugs one shoulder, “I’m still learning.” You nod and let him guide you to the bassinet and you carefully lay Oliver down before adjusting your shirt after clipping your nursing bra. Rosie burps and you giggle softly, liking how proud Dieter is of her and you watch him lay her down in the cradle next to Oliver. “Maybe they will be best friends.” You whisper, leaning closer to him.

“That would be cool.” Dieter imagines it, his own childhood lonely and isolated. There were times he had wished desperately for a built-in friend. “Let’s get out of here before we wake them up.” He has learned that Rosie is cranky if she gets woken up before she’s ready and he doesn’t blame her, he’s the same way. Maybe she got it from him. “So, uh, since there’s two kids….just, um, we’re gonna need that double stroller thingy, right?” Dieter asks as he walks down the hall with you. “And can you show me that carrier thing? The one you have the baby wrapped to your body? That looks cool. Oh, and uh, the diapers. The service, when we get that set up, use it for Oliver too.” He adds. “No need to have two different types of diapers, right?”

You nod, realizing it’s best not to argue. “Let’s leave them to sleep and we can work on getting the nursery set up. I- I really appreciate this opportunity, Dieter.” You tell him and lean in to kiss his cheek. He blushes as you set your phone up as a makeshift baby monitor, calling his phone, and you leave the babies to sleep. Dieter follows you, his eyes dropping down to your ass, and he curses internally when he realizes he finds you hot. 

****

“Dieter!” You call out, trying to find your boss. Oliver and Rosie are having tummy time on the play mat and you need your breast pump. It’s been a couple of months since you moved in with Dieter to become his full time nanny and it’s been surprisingly nice. Rosie is a good girl and you’ve grown to fall in love with her, making sure her and Oliver get equal treatment. “Can you get my pump?” You ask when he doesn’t respond.

“Yeah!” Dieter reluctantly lets go of his cock and tucks it away in his dress slacks. He had been trying to tug one out before he had to go to court, formally getting custody of his daughter. Nervous and not able to get high, jerking off had become even more of a habit than before now he had started thinking about you while he was doing it. You’re so fucking pretty and kind. Looking like an angel as you take care of his daughter. Dieter knows that he’s falling in love with you but he can’t do anything about it. Not willing to risk you leaving and denying Rosie the best nanny in the world. Washing his hands quickly, he rushes to the kitchen to grab the pump where you had cleaned it last night while he sterilized bottles. “Here it is.”

You thank him, breasts aching and you attach the suction, not thinking about Dieter as you sigh in relief at the milk finally being pumped. “Shit. That feels good.” You groan, the whooshing of the machine pumping and you have been pumping enough for Rosie to have milk too. It’s been a lot but you love the babies. “What time do you have to leave?” You ask Dieter, catching him staring at your tits and you hate that it thrills you. He’s so sexy, unintentionally so, and goofy as hell. He’s good with his daughter and you’ve grown close, raising the babies together, and you know it’s getting harder and harder to deny how you feel every day.

“Oh, uh, I gotta leave in twenty minutes.” His cock is still hard in his trousers and he twitches at the groan you make. Every day you pump, having no modesty around him now and you shouldn’t - it’s natural but Dieter still thinks it’s sexy. “I’m nervous.” He admits, glancing over at Rosie as she squeals and waves her arms on her tummy. “I know that my lawyer said it’s a formality, but what if the judge doesn’t like me? What if he takes Rosie from me?”

You shake your head and reach for his hand, squeezing it. “I promise you, it’s gonna be fine, D. You’re a good daddy and that will be shown. I know your past hasn’t been ideal but you got this. You’re a good man, Rosie is lucky to have you. We all are. It’s gonna be fine. I promise you.” You offer him a soft smile and squeeze his hand again.

“I’m more nervous than the night I won my Oscar.” Dieter confesses with a nervous chuckle. He doesn’t tell you that he was high, sure that you could guess that, although he has done anything more than hit his weed pen since you’ve moved in. Rosie is surprisingly therapeutic, although he’s glad she doesn’t understand what he talks about during the nights he gets up with her. The movie is almost halfway done shooting and he’s going to make sure that once he’s done, you get a week off so you can veg for more than a night. He looks down at your joined hands and smiles. “I’ll call you when I get out, okay?” He asks, and you nod, letting go of him. “And eat that kale and beet salad in the fridge”, he throws over his shoulder as he rushes towards the door. “It’s supposed to help the milk supply.”

You roll your eyes playfully, looking back at the babies. “Daddy is silly, isn’t he?” You talk to Rosie and look at Oliver, saddened that he isn’t going to know his father. You wonder what Ollie would think of Dieter. They are similar in a lot of ways but Ollie was always practical, making sure you weren’t in a relationship because of his strenuous job as a firefighter. He didn’t want you to be one of those women sitting around waiting for him. You sigh and wonder what you are going to do about Dieter. It’s too comfortable with him. 

****

“Dinner’s ready!” You call out. The babies are now six and seven months old. Sitting in their baby bouncers, watching you setting the dinner out for Dieter. He’s finished filming and you want to celebrate. The nice bottle of wine on the table alongside his favorite pasta.

“Oh my god, you spoil me.” Dieter groans as he comes into the dining room, freshly showered and in comfortable clothes. Rosie squeals happily and so does Oliver, both of them in their high chairs. Dieter grins leaning in and blowing a raspberry on his daughter’s cheek and then on your son’s. He never thought he was a kid type of person, but his playfulness extends to your son. He’s a good kid and it would not be right when you are so good with Rosie if he ignored the little guy. It makes him imagine that the four of you are a family, a real one and he was coming home from work to all of you. “You didn’t have to do this.”

You shake your head, enjoying the way his hand finds your waist as you reach for the parmesan on the counter. You turn to face him, cupping his cheek, “you just finished filming. You deserve a treat.” You smile, caressing his cheek and your eyes dip down to his lips for a second. He stares at you and you clear your throat, lowering your hand, “let’s eat. You must be starving.” You set the cheese down and glance over at the babies, you fed them while dinner was cooking so now you and Dieter can enjoy your meal.

“How was your day?” He’s finding that this, fatherhood and responsibility, is grounding for him. Not just concentrating on his whims and trolling through boredom. Every day is different and challenging with kids, especially when he’s trying to make sure that none of his own parents' mistakes affect Rosie. “The kids were okay?” He asks, pouring more wine into each of your glasses. You hum in protest but Dieter shakes his head. “Just pump and dump. You deserve more than one glass.” He huffs.

You sigh but let him pour some more wine, it’s been stressful with the babies today. “Rosie decided to throw up all over Oliver and herself so both of them needed a bath and then Oliver managed to get his diaper off in his onesie so he needed another bath and then Rosie wouldn’t stop crying because Oliver wasn’t next to her. It’s been - it’s been a day.” You sigh and Dieter nods, reaching for your hand. It feels so normal, like you’re complaining to your husband about your hectic day over wine and you look up at Dieter, “I love them both so much but today was…it was a lot.”

“I can imagine.” Dieter squeezes your hand gently and once again thinks that it’s odd that you don’t feel like his employee. You feel like his wife, although he’s never kissed you, or touched you like he’s imagined. “Let me take both the kids tonight.” He offers. “I’ve got the next week off before I have to do all the press bullshit for the other movie coming out in two weeks. Why don’t you take a little vacation? A spa or something?” His parenting skills have improved drastically and there have been times where he’s watched Oliver for you. Like when you had to go for another postpartum checkup.

You groan, letting go of his hand so you can continue eating. “I won’t lie…a massage sounds good. My back has been killing me.” You confess, twirling the pasta around your fork and you bite your lip, wondering what a massage from him would be like with his hands. “I wouldn’t mind going to the mall. I need some new clothes that aren't leggings.” You chuckle, “and I need some new underwear.” You sigh before you chew on the pasta.

Dieter’s cock twitches at the thought of your underwear. Not that he sees them. You’ve taken over doing the laundry even though he offered to have someone come in. Or he could help. Insisting that it was no problem. Johan had even commented that you made his house seem like a real home, and Dieter couldn’t deny that. “You could do all that.” He promises. “I’ll watch the kids. I want to spend some time with R and O.”

You feel guilty leaving the kids behind but you trust Dieter, something you never thought you’d say, but he has proven himself to be an amazing father. You smile, “thanks baby.” You tell him and he swallows the wine down. It’s getting harder to deny how you feel. After finishing eating, Dieter helps you clean up while you have the babies in the play pen. “Bedtime for the bubbies.” You coo, picking up Rosie and kissing her hair. “Daddy is gonna change you, baby girl.” You slide her into Dieter’s arms and pick up Oliver.

“Why don’t you go take your own bath?” Dieter offers, grinning down at Rosie. “You’ve had them all day and you said it’s been rough. Go take a bubble bath. I can get them ready for bed.” He’s made huge strides as a father, as a caretaker and now that he’s more confident, he finds he likes it. Kids are fun. And easy to learn how to please. “I can rock them both and get them settled.”

“Are you sure?” You ask, trusting him but you want him to be comfortable. 

“I am for this.” He promises and you nod, “you got this. I- I can feed O before they get to sleep.” You say and he shakes his head. 

“No. I got it.” He promises, knowing he can warm up your milk. 

You lean in to kiss the babies’ heads, “goodnight my loves. I love you so much.” You say to them and you look up at Dieter, offering him a grateful smile. You make your way into the bathroom, sighing in relief when you sink into the tub.

Dieter hums to the babies as he warms up their last bottles of the night. Changed and in clean onesies, they are ready for that last bottle. Smirking to himself as he tests the breast milk on his wrist and barely resists licking it. He wants to try it, but he feels like that might be crossing a line. Getting both of the babies settled in each arm and they can hold their own bottle now with a little help. “You two are like twins, you know that?” He coos at both of them, settling in the rocker on the nursery while they eat. Watching their eyes grow heavier as they suck. You had both decided to keep them in the same nursery, letting them bond and it has worked out so much better than he had ever hoped. He loves Oliver like Rosie and when they fall asleep at the same time, he’s grinning as he holds them for a little longer before shifting to put them to sleep in the same crib. They cried if they were separated, curling up together during the night as if they were twins.

You sigh, relaxing in the hot water until you decide to get out and say goodnight to the babies. You shrug your robe on, tying it as you make your way to the nursery as Dieter leans over the crib. “They asleep?” You whisper and he nods. You caress their heads, loving how they are asleep together, keeping each other safe. Sometimes you see them holding hands in the night. It’s adorable. You rest your head on Dieter’s shoulder as you watch them for another moment and he turns his head to kiss your hair. It makes your heart pound and you pull away, letting the babies sleep with the white noise machine running.

Dieter’s hands seem to be twitchy as you walk out of the nursery in front of him. He knows that you are only dressed in a robe and he wants nothing more than to strip you out of it and touch you. Make you shake in pleasure. “Do you want to have a drink?” Dieter asks. “Or are you calling it a night?”

“A drink sounds good. Relax after a long day.” You smile, walking into the kitchen to open the second bottle of wine you’d bought earlier. You work fast to open it, pouring a glass and handing it to him before you settle on the sofa. “You wanna continue watching that show on HBO?” You ask, knowing he hates it when you watch an episode without him.

“Yes!” Dieter lights up and he narrows his eyes at you playfully. “You better not have already watched it.” He threatens playfully, handing you the remote. He likes when you relax and loves that you feel completely at home here. It is your home. He leans towards you and takes a sip of the wine. “What do you think is gonna happen, this episode? The previews looked good.”

You nod, shifting closer towards him. “I promise you. I haven’t seen it yet.” You assure him and have another sip of your wine. You love and hate how relaxed you are, how easy this is. How real it feels. Like you’re a proper family. The baby monitor is on the coffee table and you rest your head on Dieter’s shoulder as he presses play. You barely watch the show, too focused on the way Dieter feels pressed against you.

About halfway through the show Dieter shuffles, throwing his arm around the backside of the couch and around you. Letting you slide down against him more. You pull the throw blanket over your legs and he smiles, wondering how you are always cold but it’s a cute quirk he’s noticed.

You snuggle into his side, hand finding his chest and you caress the skin under the shirt he always has half buttoned. He sighs and you breathe him in, pleased to feel his heart thumping under your touch. This intimacy, it’s what keeps you satisfied when you yearn for more but you can’t risk it. Your job. Your home. Your life is connected to his and you can’t afford to mess it up. 

“Marry me.” Dieter says and you think you misheard him. 

“What?” You ask, not moving. 

“Marry me.” He repeats and you jerk back from his side so you can look him in the eyes. 

“What- did you just ask me to marry you?”

“I did.” Dieter nods, turning towards you and reaching for your hand. “I love you. I love how you make this house feel like a home. I love how you care for Rosie and I love Oliver.” He adds. “I love coming home to you and I want this-“ he motions around the house and between the two of you. “To be real. I want to touch you, kiss you. Make love to you.” Dieter isn’t a man who talks in terms like ‘making love’ but that’s exactly what it would be. “I think you love me too, don’t you? I know you do.”

You shake your head, wanting to tell him you love him. He’s crazy, he leaves his socks everywhere and he has so many holes in his shirts but he’s kind and whacky and so damn funny. You love him, you’re in love with him, but to marry him would be a bad idea. You can’t risk this life you’ve created together. “Dieter.” You sigh, pulling your hand out of his. “We can’t. We can’t risk the babies. We - if it all went wrong, then I’d be moving out with Oliver and Rosie loses him and vice versa. If it all went wrong, I’d be homeless and I wouldn’t have anything. I can’t risk that for my son. I can’t. I’m sorry.”

His heart breaks but he’s determined to convince you this is a good thing. Latching onto what you said about being homeless, his eyes widen. “I’ll buy you a house.” He bursts out. “In your name alone. It’ll be yours. Completely.” He nods to himself, grinning like an idiot and picks up your hand again. “It won’t go wrong, you’re perfect and I love you. I want to be with you and our babies all the time and fuck, I want another baby when you’re ready.” He missed everything about Rosie’s birth and he wants to see your stomach large with a baby, his baby. “But if it did-“ he stresses the word ‘if’, “-you would have a house for you and Oliver. And you could rent it out right now. The money would be yours. Totally yours.”

Your eyes widen and you shake your head, “I can’t - that’s too much. A house here is insane. That’s a crazy amount to put into this. That - a whole damn house? That’s what you want to do?” You ask incredulously and he nods. 

“All I know is that I can’t stop thinking about you. I need you. I love you.” He promises and you swallow harshly, tears stinging in your eyes. 

Your heart yearns for him yet your head tells you it’s too much of a risk. “Dieter…” You trail off and he frowns, pulling away slightly, sensing your rejection. “I love you.” Your eyes water and a sob escapes your lips as you start to cry. No one has ever been so kind to you. To know he loves you enough to buy a house so you feel secure in case something goes wrong. It has you sobbing.

He lunges forward, crushing you to him in a comforting hug. “Don’t cry baby, please don’t cry. I never want you to cry.” He pleads, sure that he’s messed up somehow. “I’m sorry, I just can’t stop wanting you. Seeing you with our babies, I think- I wish they were ours. Our twins and we had them together.” He rubs your back and pets your hair as you sob into his chest and he tries to think of how he could make you feel better.

You sob into his chest at his words, wishing they were true but it’s not and that’s okay. The babies brought you together and you know you and Dieter would’ve never met if it weren’t for that single moms group. “I - I love you.” You offer him a watery smile as you pull back and he reaches out to gently wipe your tears away. “I love you and I want you to be mine. I want to be yours. I love you Dieter.” You confess, cupping his cheeks.

Dieter’s smile is slow, soft and he can’t believe that you are saying yes. He leans in and presses his lips to yours softly. Loving how you immediately open for him to slide his tongue against yours with a groan. Pulling you close against him again, this time shamelessly pressing his body against yours. “I love you.” He promises, kissing down your jaw line. “Do you want to have sex with me? Or do you want to wait?” He wants you in his bed, but if you wanted to wait until the deed to the house was in your hands, he would understand that. He would go out tomorrow and buy you the best house he could find.

You know you’ve spent far too much time thinking about him, having him inside of you, pressing against you, and you know you should slow down but you can’t. “I want you. I don’t want to wait. I want you now.” You tell him breathlessly and you press your lips to his, cupping his cheek while you slide your tongue against his.

Groaning, Dieter pulls you closer and starts to lean you back against the sofa, knowing that he needs to take you to bed but right now, he needs to feel you under him. “So beautiful.” He praises, kissing your chin and nips your skin with his teeth.

You sigh, loving how it feels to have him touch you. His hand sliding along your thigh and you whimper, “Dieter. Please. I want you to touch me.” You plead, guiding his hand to the tie of your robe while your hands caress his chest under his ratty t-shirt.

He hums, twitching against your hip and he leans back and grins at you, “I’m going to, baby. I’m going to make sure you know exactly what you are getting from me.” He pulls your robe open and groans at the sight of your tits. Looking back up at you. “Can I taste?” He asks. “I’ve dreamed of tasting your milk.”

Your cunt clenches around nothing at the thought. “You���ve imagined it?” You ask breathlessly and he nods so you move fast to straddle him, his cock hard against your thigh, and you lean in towards him to kiss him as you shrug your robe off of your shoulders. “You can have a taste.”

He knows your tits are tender, hearing you complain and watching as you sometimes have to massage them. He cups them in his hands, groaning at how full they are, grinning. “Fuck, I can drink it all since you were going to dump it.” He realizes as he leans forward to wrap his lips around one nipple.”

“Oh shit.” You gasp, groaning softly at the relief and arousal coursing through you. You love it. Tangling your fingers in his hair, you watch him gulp down your milk and you’re amazed that he enjoys it. “Oh God baby.” You pant, feeling the relief of your milk draining and the way he sucks on your nipple, biting it now and then.

“Shit.” He gasps, feeling his cock throbbing. “It’s better than I expected.” He moans, switching to your other breasts and he knows this will become a favorite thing for him now. One hand slides down between your thighs and he is so fucking happy to find you wet.

“Dieter. Please.” You beg, needing more from him. It’s been so long since someone touched you. Not since Ollie. You rock down onto his fingers, loving how he rubs your clit while his lips suckle on your other breast. “Oh fuck, D. So good.” You whimper, caressing his shoulders.

“What do you want, baby?” He pulls off your nipple with a pop. “You want me to eat your pussy?” He groans at the thought. “Want to sit on Dieter’s face? Smother me with your cunt?”

You giggle breathlessly, “that’s the only way to shut you up?” You tease and he nods, “one of the few ways.” 

You laugh and he moves fast to shift, laying down and he pulls you over to hover over his face. “Shit baby. So good to me.” You gasp when he drags you down on top of his face.

The first taste is always amazing. Sliding his tongue though your folds as he pulls your hips down onto his mouth. Holding you there as he licks and then sucks on your clit.

You whimper, “baby. Oh baby.” You moan, grinding down onto his face. “So good. So fucking good.” You moan, loving how enthusiastic he is and he squeezes your ass, encouraging you to move. You do, rocking your hips down even more.

He doesn’t care that you two are on the couch or that he is throbbing in his pants. All he cares about is making you moan his name. He knows he will slide inside you as soon as you cum for him. He moans against your clit, loving how you are smothering him just like he wanted you to. Using him for your pleasure.

“Fuck. Fuck. It’s so good, baby.” You pant, lost in the pleasure of his mouth on you. You rock on top of his mouth, his nose pressing against your clit as his tongue pushes deep. “Fuck baby. Yes. Yes. Yes. Keep - keep going.” You beg, moaning his name.

He can’t breathe, but he doesn’t care. Too busy licking into you to feel your walls start to convulse around his tongue. Moaning when the first rush if your juices hit his mouth and your moan of his name almost makes him cum in his pants. Digging his fingers into your hips, Dieter doubles down on making you shriek his name.

You throw your head back as he makes you cum, moaning his name as you clamp down around his tongue. “Fuck baby. Fuck. I- I love you.” You whine when he works you through it and you whimper, lifting off of him when it becomes too much.

Panting like he was the one who had cum, Dieter licks his lips, completely pussy drunk as he caresses your side. Enjoying the boneless way you collapse on top of him as you try to catch your breath. “I love you. Fuck, you’re my new favorite meal.”

You inhale deeply, shifting off of him and you waste no time in tugging his shirt off of him. “Baby. I want to see all of you.” You tell him, tossing the ragged shirt away and you pull his sweats down to expose his cock. “Holy - that’s what you got?” Your eyes are wide at the girth and you wrap your fingers around him.

Dieter groans, bucking his hips and biting his lip in pleasure. “Fuck, is that not enough?” He gasps out. Normally women have no issue with his size but maybe your Ollie was hung like a horse.

“Not enough? Dieter, baby, I’m gonna feel you tomorrow.” You assure him, “I’m gonna need - wow. You might have to get some lube.” You admit and you start to pump him, in awe that your fingers don’t touch. You know it’s been so long since you’ve had sex and he is thick. You’ve always preferred girth over length anyway. “You’re big.” You promise him, leaning in to flick your tongue over the leaking slit.

He preens at your praise, eyes rolling back in his head at the feel of your tongue. “I’ve got lube.” He promises, reaching down and cradling your jaw. “Use it all the time, jerking off thinking about you.” He’s not ashamed of masturbating while thinking of you. “Baby let's go to the bedroom. You can ride me if you want more control.”

You want to suck his cock but you know you’ll have plenty of time to do that later. Right now, you need him inside of you. Releasing his cock, you pick up the baby monitor and stand up, smirking as you make your way to his bedroom. He’s scrambling to get his sweatpants off and you disappear down the hall, throwing over your shoulder, “don’t keep me waiting, Bravo.”

“Shit.” He hisses, eager to chase after you. Noticing that you are headed to his bedroom and not your own. “I’m coming baby, fuck.” He watches your ass shake as you sway your hips. “Gonna buy you the biggest fucking house I can find.”

You giggle, setting the monitor down on the nightstand and you gasp when Dieter’s hands grab your hips, pulling you back into him. You quickly spin and wrap your arms around his neck, pressing your lips to his. “I love you.” You murmur against his mouth, his hard cock pressing into your stomach.

“I love you too.” Dieter moans softly, sliding his hands down and squeezing your ass. “Do you- do you need me to wear a condom?” He asks, sure that you aren’t wanting to get pregnant so soon after having your son. It wasn’t like you two had discussed birth control.

“No. I- I got an IUD put in. Figured they might as well do it while I was there and it wasn’t painful. I’m clean too. Not been with anyone since Ollie.” You promise and wonder if he’s clean. You don’t know when he slept with someone last. Maybe after you arrived. You don’t know. It’s not like it was your business when you were just his nanny.

He nods. “I uh, I haven’t been with anyone since Rosie has shown up. I’m clean.” He promises, eager to slide inside you and feel you without a barrier. “I didn’t want to do that kind to shit around her. Give her a good example. Don’t want her to be like me.”

You cup his cheeks, “you’re a good father and she’s gonna be just fine. You’re doing a good job.” You remind him, leaning in to kiss along his jaw. “Come on baby, you want me to ride you?” You ask and he nods. You let go of him and he walks over to his nightstand to grab the lube while you kneel on the bed. When he’s laying down, you grab the bottle and squirt some into your hand, wrapping your fingers around his cock to coat him before you swipe your fingers through your folds to make sure you’re slick enough. “Fuck, you’re gonna stretch me out.” You tell him as you straddle him.

“Want to see it.” Dieter pants, chest heaving as he watches you position his cock at your entrance. Moaning your name as you start to sink down on him, he can feel his entire body light up in pleasure at the hot clutch of your cunt. “I love you. I fucking love you.” Dieter cries, his fingers digging into your thighs as you slowly take him deeper, watching your mouth drop open and loving the way you moan his name.

Your eyes close as you slowly sink down onto him. He’s so thick, it stings, but you like that. It’s been so long since you had sex and this is the man you love. Your heart pounds in your chest as your thighs meet his, his cock fully inside of you, and his fingers sink into your flesh. “Shit. Shit. Shit.” He grunts and you giggle, leaning down to kiss along his jaw. “I fucking love you too.” You murmur, licking along his neck until you are biting his earlobe so you can give yourself a moment to adjust to him.

He whines, unable to stop himself from lurching up in pleasure. “Oh did you like that?” You giggle breathlessly, making him moan and turn his head so you can do it again. 

“More baby, fuck. Want you to mark me up.” He begs, so starved for attention that he needs to drown in it. His hand squeezes your ass again and it takes concentration to not urge you to move, your walls fluttering so deliciously around him.

You love how desperate he is for you. Biting down on his earlobe again and his cock twitches inside of you. You take pity, finally feeling comfortable, and you shift, rocking on his cock while you nibble on his ear, whispering “you’re mine. I’m gonna make sure everyone sees it.” You smirk as you kiss down his neck, sucking and biting on his skin.

“Fuck yes, I’m yours, I’m yours.” Dieter chants, rocking his hips up to chase your cunt when you lift off of him. Hating even the brief few seconds where he’s not buried inside your warmth. “All yours baby.” He groans, closing his eyes at the pure bliss of being able to touch you, to tell you what he’s thinking without worrying about offending you. “Gonna marry you. Give you everything.” He gasps out.

You moan, “I’m yours too. Been yours since I moved into this house. I’m gonna be your wife.” You promise and he groans, hands caressing your back. You kiss his collarbone and shift back, making his cock sink deeper and you grab his hands to help you balance as you ride his cock. “Fuck. Yes. God, so good. So good inside of me.” You ramble, squeezing his hands as you start to pick up the pace.

“God, fuck, your pussy is gold.” His toes curl and he loves how you start to bounce on his cock. Making your tits away heavily and he watches with them unabashed lust. “So fucking gorgeous.” He pants. “Can’t wait to see you pregnant, riding my cock.”

“One day.” You promise with a grin, breathless from how good this feels. You let go of his hands, leaning back to grab his knees, and you grind down onto his cock, hitting just the right spot to make you gasp. “Fuck, baby. Oh my - I’m - it’s gonna make me cum.” You confess, reaching down to rub your clit.

Dieter frowns and slaps your hand away, pouting up at you. “Let me.” He insists, pressing his thumb to your clit and rubbing a tight circle over the bundle of nerves while you bounce on his cock. “Fuck baby, cum, please cum. I’m gonna -“ he hisses. “Not gonna last. Too fucking tight.” Your walls clenching down around him every other bounce is getting to be too much and he grits his teeth, praying he lasts long enough for you to soak his cock.”

Your moans are getting breathier as you struggle to breathe from the pleasure. “Oh fuck. Oh fuck. Dieter. I’m gonna - oh!” You moan, clamping down on his cock and soaking him, his thumb still working your clit until your thighs are shaking. “Cum for me.” You beg breathlessly, wanting to feel it as you convulse on top of him from your orgasm.

You don’t have to say anything else. His entire body is aching to cum, gripping your hips harshly as he starts to thrust wildly up into your body. “Oh shit, oh shit, oh shiiiiiiiiiit.” Dieter whines, burying his cock half a dozen more times before his back is bowing and he is crying out your name, filling you with hot spurts of his seed.

You pant, collapsing onto his chest as his cock twitches inside of you, and you kiss along his neck. Unable to speak, you enjoy the aftermath of your orgasms. The connection you feel to Dieter has you on cloud nine. He’s a good father and a good man, despite what the paps print. He’s changed for his child and that makes you love him more. “Good?” You ask breathlessly, hoping he enjoyed it as much as you did.

“So fucking good.” Dieter’s eyes are closed and his expression is one of pure relaxation. Enjoying the way you feel on top of him. “God, you’re spending the night right here. Every night from now on.” He slides a hand up and down your back, enjoying the feeling of your slick skin under his palm. “Now we just need the kids to sleep through the night.”

“Soon. They are getting better. And you want another one to keep us awake?” You tease, giggling when his cock twitches inside of you. 

“I do.” He promises and you caress his cheek, leaning back to look into his eyes. “Me too. One day.” You lean in to softly kiss his lips, knowing you want this man to be your husband, to be everything. **** 

“Diet, babe. Can you get me that - shit.” You hiss after you feel the baby kick your ribcage. 

“Bad word mama.” Rosie points at you and you nod, “sorry, love. Mama needs to sit down.” You tell the three year old. Ollie comes over to sit down on the sofa next to you, his small hand on your belly as he leans in to talk to the baby in your belly. Rosie follows suit, wanting to do what her brother is doing. 

“Hello baby. It’s me. Your big brother-” 

“and sister.” Rosie adds as she leans in to press her ear to your stomach. You smile, tears in your eyes and look up to see Dieter walk into the living room. 

“You called baby?” He asks, paint splattered all over him from painting the new nursery. 

“Yeah. I’m sorry. Can you- can you get me some ice cream?” You bite your lip, knowing he’s been run ragged with your cravings.

Dieter grins, shoving his hand through his paint flecked hair, although he teases that the gray is because of you and the babies. “What kind of ice cream do you want, babe?” He strides over and rubs your bump before dropping a kiss on your lips. “Rocky road or are you wanting that cheesecake strawberry swirl?” He knows you will probably text him with more cravings, but he doesn’t mind. You are carrying his baby and you get what you want.

You smile at him, loving how flustered he looks when he has to go get your cravings, and you run your fingers over the kids’ heads before they look up at Dieter. 

“Can we have ice cream, daddy?” Rosie asks, that pout she definitely got from Dieter on her face. 

Oliver nods, “yes! Vanilla.” 

Rosie shakes her head, “chocolate!” 

You giggle and look at your husband, “I’ll have rocky road. Guess it’s an ice cream day.” You say and the kids cheer, excited to have ice cream.

“Vanilla, chocolate and rocky road.” Dieter nods, smiling down at the kids. He could never deny them much and while they would be considered spoiled, they were very well behaved. “Oh-“ he snaps his fingers. “Before I forget. The management agency called. They found another renter for the house and said that the repairs for the house were minimal, just paint to freshen up.” 

True to his word, he had bought you a house, deeded it in your name and hired a management company to handle the day to day issues and repairs. All of the profits were deposited into a bank account that was solely yours, even though you had access to everything of Dieter’s. “So that’s a weight off before the baby comes.”

The money going into that bank account is going to pay for the kids’ college. You won’t use it for yourself, not when you are happily married to Dieter. “Yes. Glad they managed to find another tenant.” You smile, reaching for his hand to kiss the back of it. 

“Daddy!” Oliver rushes over to him after shifting off of the sofa. 

“Yeah, buddy?” Dieter groans as he bends over to pick him up. 

“Can I come? To get ice cream?” He asks and Dieter nods, “of course.” You smile, loving how close Oliver and Dieter are. You adopted Rosie and he adopted Oliver not long after you were married. It felt natural and meant to be. Your little family, complicated but perfect. 

“We will be right back. Rosie, you wanna come?” Dieter asks and she shakes her head, climbing onto the sofa. 

“I wanna stay with mommy.” You pull her close, “we can watch our show while the boys are out.” You tell her in a playful whisper and she grins. 

“We will be back soon.” Dieter promises and you smirk at him, “after ice cream, the kids need to nap. Mommy needs ‘nap time’ too.” You say to Dieter and he smirks back at you, “what mommy wants, mommy gets.” He promises, knowing he wants you to moan his name while the kids are asleep. From Rosie getting shoved into his arms on a random day, to having a family with a baby on the way. Dieter never imagined being a family man but now, he wouldn’t have it any other way.

[archangeldyke-all]

sevika in relathionship so pretty so fluff

an maybe hard sex.... and if your comfortable chasekink you know

ty for the requests!! i hope u enjoy :)

men and minors dni

first! fluffy sev relationship hcs!

i think she'd be guarded at first

she's completely obsessed with u, and it would freak her out.

so at first, she'd keep you at a distance, scared of how soft you make her feel.

she'd limit you guys to one or two dates a week. (even though she wants to spend every waking moment with you.)

she wouldn't spend the night, wouldn't invite you to her place. (she's scared she might have a heart attack if she sees you comfortable and domestic in her own home.)

but after a while, she realizes you aren't going anywhere. she doesn't have to keep you away, because you want to be with her just as much as she wants to be with you.

once she works this out (like 2/3 months in) it's a complete flip.

like overnight, sevika goes from being a bit distant and closed off to a complete romantic sap.

she's always touching you, whether it's hanging off you as you do chores around the house, or sliding a hand in your back pocket while shopping together.

she spends almost every night with you. moves you into her apartment as soon as you let her.

she's always doing thoughtful little favors for you, without you even having to ask.

like she overhears a conversation you're having with a friend and you mention how you're craving food from a specific restaurant.so she goes out to get take out from that place for dinner that night.

if you're in the shower, she'll throw your towels in the dryer for you so they're toasty warm when you get out.

she's always buying you things, or building you things, or bringing home cool things to show you. (totally the type of gf to give you cool rocks.)

as far as sevika chasing u/ hard sex, here's a little something i cooked up for u... (ft. amab sevika... or she's just strapped with the breeding strap 24/7... it's up to u)

singed, silco, and sevika are constantly experimenting with different variations of shimmer for various desired effects. most of the time, it's singed and silco watching rats react to drops of the drug. but when they're satisfied with their trials and ready to test it on a larger subject, they'll call in sevika for help.

so one day, as sevika's leaving for work, she tells you that she'll be working late, to not worry if you don't see her for a while. you pout and ask her what'll be keeping her, she tells you her and 'the boys' were testing out some new variants. she kisses your pout away and promises to take you out for dinner over the weekend.

"should be interesting." she says, pulling her cloak over her head. "singed says the rats were goin' fuckin' crazy." you gulp.

"just be careful, sev." you plea, straightening her cloak out for her and tucking her hair behind her ears. she rolls her eyes. "don't roll your eyes. i want you back in one piece."

she leans into kiss you one final time. "don't worry baby. i'll see you tomorrow."

you wake up the next morning alone and cold. you curse your girlfriend for abandoning you, but go about your day without much concern.

when you get home that afternoon and sevika's still not back. you start to worry. when night falls and she's still not home, you throw on your coat and shoes and march down to the last drop.

you start getting more and more freaked the closer you get to the last drop. it's a friday night, and the usual crowd that would be lining the street to get in is nowhere to be seen. the neon eye isn't lit, and when you get to the front door, there's no lights on inside.

you try the handle.

nothing.

you knock.

nothing.

you're about five seconds away from breaking the glass when you hear the sound of the back door swinging open. sprinting around the building, you find silco and all his employees flooding out into the alley. all except sevika. silco freezes at the sight of you.

somewhere behind him, singed mumbles. "good, she's here."

terror seizes you.

"what did you do to her?" you demand.

"now, don't work yourself up into a tizzy, dear--" silco is cut off by a loud crash coming from inside the bar.

"there goes the barricade." ran mumbles. a few goons start to scatter, backing away from the bar then breaking out into sprints when more crashing begins. silco puts a hand on your shoulder, and singed begins to ramble behind him, nervously.

"sevika had an... unexpected reaction to the shimmer." silco slowly starts walking you backwards as singed continues to talk. glass shatters behind you. "it seems we may have accidentally triggered her, ahem..."

"her more primal instincts--" silco cuts in

"--yes! her primal instincts-- a little too intensely..."

"what does that mean?" you ask. silco laughs nervously.

"it's easier for you to just see for yourself." he says, guiding you through the doorway and into the back of the last drop. you snap around when you hear sevika's pained groan echo throughout the empty bar.

"where is she?" you demand. silco doesn't answer. you turn around to face him, but he's gone, and the back door is slamming in your face. "hey!" you say, pushing on the door. "what the fuck?" the door doesn't budge, and you can make out the shape of a dumpster being pushed in front of the exit through the frosted glass.

you blink in shock. what the fuck was happening?

you were quickly distracted by another whimper echoing through the halls. you took off into the bar, searching for sevika. "sev?" you call out. "sevika?" you made your way onto the dance floor, eyes scouring the trashed bar for your girlfriend. "sevika!"

a gasp sounds from behind the bar. you run over. "go away!" sevika growls. you ignore her, rounding the bar and crouching beside her where she's laying on the ground in the fetal position.

"it's me, baby, i'm here. what happened?" you ask, quickly putting your hands on her back, trying to turn her over.

"you need to get the fuck out of here, right now." sevika spits out. her voice is deep and raspy, and her shirt is soaked in sweat, the skin beneath it on fire. she seems... bigger somehow. like the shimmer added another ten pounds of muscle on top of her already chiseled body.

"what's going on baby?" you ask, tears running down your cheeks, pressing a kiss to her head. "tell me how i can help."

in the blink of an eye, sevika's flipping over and slamming you onto the ground, her mechanical hand encircling your throat and squeezing, cutting off your oxygen in a flash. you gasp, clawing at her copper hand. above you, sevika snarls, her spit drips down onto your face, her eyes glowing purple.

"you need to get the fuck out of here before i tear. you. apart." she growls. her teeth seem sharper. you shudder beneath her, struggling against her hold.

suddenly, sevika throws her body off yours, writhing in pain. you scramble to your feet, gasping for air, backing away from her. as soon as you get breath back in your lungs, you dash for the double doors in the front of the bar. behind you, you hear sevika snarl.

you flick the bolt on the doors and push, but the door doesn't budge. you can hear a chain and padlock clanging against each other with every shove you give the door.

you're going to kill silco if sevika doesn't kill you first.

turning around, you see sevika standing behind the bar, eyeing you like prey. her nostrils are flared, her eyes are dead set on you, teeth bared like she's going to rip your throat out. you damn near piss yourself.

you take off for the stairs, cursing when you hear sevika's footsteps take off after you. scrambling upstairs, you duck into silco's office, grabbing a chair and throwing it at the windowed wall behind his desk. a panel shatters, just barely big enough for you to fit through, and just as you're about to leap down to the street fifteen feet below you, a heavy hand lands on your nape, pulling you off your feet then hurling you toward the ground.

you land with a grunt, and then sevika lands on top of you.

"sevika!" you say, punching at her chest, trying to push her off you. "let me go!"

"i told you to get out of here and you didn't fuckin' listen." she growls above you. in all your flailing, you manage to claw sevika across her face. three lines of blood bubble up across her cheek. sevika stares down at you in shock and you stare up at her in fear. then, she laughs.

"you're cute when you're scared, honey." she says. the violent glint in her eye shifts to something you recognize a little more, and then she's flipping you, pinning you to the ground with a hand on your head, tearing your pants off with the other.

"sevika!" you gasp, scandalized. she doesn't hear you, shredding the fabric covering your ass until it's free. she smacks it, laughing at the way you squirm. "what the fuck are you doing!?"

"tried to kill everyone else. shoulda known i wouldn't wanna kill you, sweetheart." she growls. you shiver beneath her. "silco's smart, sending you in here."

"what the fuck are you talking-- oh!" suddenly, your panties are torn off your hips. "sevika!" you gasp.

above you, sevika rearranges herself. she pushes at your hips until your ass is up in the air, and you whimper. you gasp when you feel the sole of her rubber boot press down against your head, taking her hand's place. you struggle against her, and she smacks your ass, pressing her foot down against your head harder.

with two hands on your hips, she starts grinding her clothed buldge against your cunt. you whimper.

"sev-sevika what--"

"you're soaked." she snarls. "fuck, you're such a whore. choked you out and you're creamin' your panties." her voice is a mixture of disgust and admiration. your shaking like a leaf beneath her. "'m gonna put a fuckin' baby in you now." she growls. you gasp.

her hand leaves your hip for half a second to shove her waistband down, and then all at once, she's gripping your hip again, spitting on your fluttering asshole, shoving her cock inside you to the hilt.

you gasp at the stinging stretch in your cunt, tears welling up in your eyes. sevika has no mercy, not giving you a moment to adjust before she starts pounding into you.

"i'd fuckin' live in this cunt if i could." she grunts as she smacks your ass. you whine. "feels so good."

"sev!" you screech. "slow down!"

she doesn't slow down, instead she spits in her hand and reaches around you to start rubbing your clit. "that better baby?" she asks. you gasp. "yeah, that's better." she answers for you, rutting her hips against your ass.

the tip of her dick is nudging your cervix, and pleasure quickly starts taking over the pain. she fills you so fucking well, like her cock was made for you, like your cunt was made for her. she grunts behind you. "yeah babe?" she asks. oh shit, you must've been talking out loud. you nod as best as you can beneath her boot.

"yeah." you moan.

"you want my cum?" she asks again. you shudder.

"yes!" you screech. she chuckles.

"you first. milk it outta me." she grunts. your eyes roll to the back of your head, your cunt clenching hard around her. she whimpers, her hold on you tightening. "cum on my cock baby." she grunts, smacking your ass. that's all it takes for you to fall apart beneath her.

your legs shake as you cum, and sevika growls, her foot lifting off your head and settling behind you to get better leverage as she fucks her cock as deep as it can go inside you. She gives her hips three more thrusts before she's groans, her hot cum filling you up, and dripping down your thighs.

the two of you collapse simultaneously. she's crushing you with her weight but it's a comforting crush, and you sigh happily. sevika kisses your head.

"you okay?" she asks.

"yeah." you say dreamily. she chuckles.

"'m sorry."

"not your fault." you mumble. "thanks for not killing me." she chuckles above you.

"hmm." she hums, nuzzling into the nape of your neck.

she's asleep in a moment, her breaths evening out and tickling your ear. with sevika laying on top of you, you don't have many other options beside falling asleep beneath her.

the next morning you're both woken up by silco standing in the doorway of his office with his back turned to you, clearing his throat. "i'll give you two privacy to... clean up and go home... i just wanted to make sure you survived the night." he says.

"silco!" you call before he can shuffle away. "you need to find a new human test subject." you say. he nods.

"yes, i agree. i'm already making arrangements to make that change." he says.

"good." you say. then, "and leave a few of those shimmer samples on the bar for us."

sevika muffles her laugh in your neck as the two of you watch silco's shoulders shoot up, his ears turning bright red.

[polarspaz]

Okay, I'm sorry for bombing you with questions about InfectedRE AU so much (it will happen again), but I genuinely enjoy it so much and I want to know as much as possible.

With that said tho, I'm interested in Leon's living situation when he starts living at the base. Is he allowed out? You already showed that Ashley made him some clothes for the outside, but I kinda find it hard to believe that he would be allowed out, or at least not without someone to keep an eye on him.

And what about after the "cure" is made? (First of all, when is it even made? How long did it take Luis to make it?) Is he allowed to to move out or still forced to live at the base? Will he at least be allowed to go outside or is that also off limits because of the fact he can turn back at any point if his heart rate spikes up?

LOL it's okay! I say I write a massive wall of text...

-So Leon lives in an old USA base built in the deep wilderness of Alaska. It's about a full 24 hour drive to the nearest town, and the property is fully fenced in and plastered with DO NOT ENTER signs. So Leon is allowed outside if the coast is clear.

-Leon is not allowed anywhere in public. The military take him where they need him for missions and send him right back to the lab when the jobs done. He is escorted the entire time.

-Leon wears the disguise Ashley made for him when he's being transported between military bases. While his size makes him stand out, the outfit at least covers him completely from a lot of wandering eyes. ((Better for people to see a weird tall guy in a coat than a monster bug man.))

-Okay, now the cure took Luis at least a year 1/2 make. He wanted to make damn sure that he didn't accidently make Leon's situation any worse and tested the formula so much that Rebecca herself was starting to get worried. ((Luis is a perfectionist and still very hard on himself since his stint in Los Illuminados and Umbrella.))

-In beginning Leon isn't allowed out of base even with the drug. But over time the drug becomes more effective. Essentially the Plaga finally gets in sync with Leon's habits ((and insane fucking lifestyle)) and now knows when it's okay to relax and when it's time to kick ass.

-Seeing the improvement, the government allows Leon to be out in public, but he also must always have a handler. ((Handlers include Luis, Carlos, and the other soldiers that live with him in the lab like Tex.))

-While he's still forced to live in the Alaskan base, Leon honestly doesn't mind, as the place has become his home and he actually enjoys his life with the people there. In a way, they feel weirdly like family. ((Because I am big sap and love found family and happy endings))

[penny00dreadful]

Somebody To Love - Part 4

Hey so AO3 went down and that kinda sucked BUT it did allow me to get some writing done soooo... here you go!

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 5 Part 6 AO3

The two children Steve had sent to replace him were god damn menaces.

Well, maybe not children but they were still so goddamn young.

And they didn’t let him get away with anything. Standing over him with their arms crossed and twin looks of disapproval on their faces like the god-damn Men in Black of babysitters.

He wasn’t, like, under house arrest or anything. He was still able to get his fix whenever he wanted. He was still able to drink himself into oblivion, but they didn’t handle him with as much care as Steve had.

He had numerous opportunities to go out and get laid six ways from Sunday as well but… he wasn’t really feeling it.

Though he refused to pinpoint why.

“You know, this would have never happened if you’d just show me the list.” Eddie crossed his own arms, trying to put as much petulant haughtiness into his tone as he could muster, lying where he landed in the grass of his back garden with his pants around his ankles. At least his underwear had stayed on.

This time.

How did he get there?

Didn’t matter.

That tree was out to get him. Fuck that tree. That tree was no longer his number two favourite climbing tree. It had been bumped down to number eight to go along with the tree that dropped an apple on his head like he was Newton and the tree that had covered him in sticky sap that took forever to get off.

The woman, Max, who perpetually had her red hair in a long braid down her back, cocked an eyebrow at him. “I don’t ever remember telling him he couldn’t see the list." She said with an air of nonchalance, looking over at her co-babysitter. "Do you, Dustin?”

“You know, I think you’re right, Max." Dustin matched her tone. "I think Eddie just assumed he wasn’t allowed to see it and ran with it.”

“Hey, fuck you, man." Eddie pointed up at him. "You're supposed to be on my side. Nerds of a feather.”

"I'm on the side of the truth. Like any good scientist."

"You're a babysitter."

Dustin shrugged. "And I have hobbies."

Max rolled her eyes. “Pull your pants back up like a good little boy and I’ll show you the list.”

“I could fire you on the spot, Red, don’t test me.”

She bent low, placing her hands on her knees so she was looming menacingly over him.

“Do it." She grinned down at him. "I fucking dare you.”

Eddie scoffed. "Whatever." 

But he did still stand, bucking his pants back up.

Despite everything he was loath to admit he really liked those two. They didn't take any of his shit and they treated him like a human person rather than some mythical celebrity they had to bow and scrape to.

He held his hand out expectantly.

“Oh, we don’t have it on us.” Max said, her eyes glittering with malicious glee. “It’s on the kitchen counter.”

“Fuck off 'it’s on the kitchen counter.'”

“No, it is.” Dustin nodded. “We put it there last week.”

“We’re keeping a running tally for how many times you’ve walked past it.”

“I think we’re up to fifteen now?”

Eddie did not stomp his foot. “That’s so not fair! You know I’m off my meds!”

“You’re off your meds because of the amount of recreational shit you imbibe. That’s on you." Dustin poked him in the chest. "Maybe if you were sober for five minutes you’d have noticed it.”

Eddie turned his back on them and started to make his way towards the house. They might have had a point as to why he was off his ADHD meds but Eddie was a stubborn fucker so he’d never admit it to them.

He snatched up the list that he genuinely only just noticed for the first time because it was pointed out to him and eagerly read through Steve’s recognisable handwriting.

It was a lot shorter than he thought it would be but also it kind of covered everything?

Make sure he keeps himself alive.

Don’t let him do stupid shit.

Don’t let him kill himself with:

Alcohol poisoning.

Drug overdose.

Some super fucked up STD.

Eating shellfish by accident again.

Chasing a balloon into traffic or whatever.

If you have to put him in a protective bubble, do it.

Max, if he gets mean, get meaner.

Dustin, if he tries to worm his way out of listening to you by claiming to be ‘cool’, remind him of the time he wore a plain black suit to the Met Gala-

“Okay!” Eddie shouted into the kitchen around him, slamming the list back down with a smack. “Low fucking blow, Steve!”

“I mean, it’s true isn’t it?” Max pointed out, pulling herself up to sit on the counter.

“Listen,” he ran a hand through his hair, keeping his volume high, “It was one time and it was my first Met, I was nervous, alright?! Plus! It wasn’t even a plain black suit, it was Chanel, hello??” He waved his hand around. “It had accessories??”

Dustin leaned his elbows on the counter and rested his chin in his hands. “Steve wore yellow.”

“Yes, I know Steve wore yellow-”

“He wore a beautifully cut little yellow suit with a cape and he wasn’t even there as your plus one,” Max smirked, “he was there as your assistant and he was still better dressed than you.”

“Alright-”

“Rhianna complimented him. Said great minds think alike.”

“She was in nothing but a cape so-” Eddie threw his head back in offence. “Whatever, good luck keeping up with me, children. I’m gonna go find some prawns or some scallops and you two,” he pointed at each of them in turn, “can explain my big fat puffy face to Steve when he gets back in a few days.”

Neither of them were even remotely phased.

Eddie was practically rattling by the time Steve was due to fly back in from… wherever he’d been. Even though he probably wouldn’t see him immediately.

Like, the guy had his own home to go to, his own stuff to get reacquainted with.

His own platonic soulmate to reunite with.

So why would he call over? Steve had his own life. He had no... no obligation to come see Eddie immediately.

And that was fine.

Eddie would see him tomorrow, more than likely.

So it was no big deal.

It was fine.

It had been nearly a month since they’d spoken. It was the longest stretch of time they’d gone apart in… Jesus nearly ten years?

And Eddie had handled it fine. 

He had been so normal about it.

It wasn’t like he’d been missing a limb.

It wasn’t like half his heart had been ripped out and shipped off on a plane to wherever.

Wasn't like he'd been thinking about Steve every day, every night, every spare fucking moment he had.

Why would he?

He was... it was all... everything was fine.

He was sitting in his basement studio, plucking a stream of consciousness on his guitar that sometimes crystallised into something coherent and sometimes was something that was stuck in his head.

He looked like a ratty mess, the same worn out pyjama pants and band tees that had been with him ever since he lived in a trailer park in rural Indiana.

They were comfort clothes more than anything at this stage.

His hair… he couldn’t be dealing with his hair right now, it seemed to be out to irritate him on that particular day. Every time a strand brushed against his neck or his cheek it made him want to crawl out of his skin. He’d yanked it violently up onto the top of his head, but each repeated, frustrated shoving of a stray strand back into the bun just caused more to fall out.

He was trying desperately to distract himself but his blood was itching for… something.

He hadn’t had a good fix in a while, he wanted to be sober and clear headed for when he saw Steve again but the heightened anxiety really wasn’t helping the situation. He didn’t usually get so twitchy when he was sober, but then again, he couldn’t really remember the last time he’d been actively trying to stay away from everything. 

And maybe that shocked him a little more than it should.

Maybe it scared him just the right amount.

But it could easily be a losing battle because there were hidden nooks and crannies everywhere in his house holding some kind of mind altering substance in them. Even on the couch in his studio he could probably reach down in between the cushions and pull out a baggy of pills he'd forgotten down there at some point. He didn’t even know what half the pills he found dotted around were anymore, they could be sugar for all he knew but they were there and they wouldn’t stop whispering to him.

He wasn’t even conscious of what he was playing. It was only when he realised he was muttering lyrics to himself that he figured out what was living in his brain and automatically spilling out around him.

Somebody (Somebody) Ooh, somebody (Somebody) Can anybody find me somebody to love?

Eddie softly snorted to himself, a little self deprecatingly. Oh, the irony, he thought, especially considering-

“That’s my favourite.”

Eddie whipped around to see Steve fucking Harrington leaning against the door of his studio.

He looked, well, there was no word for it other than glowing. His skin was darker, his hair a touch lighter, the dusting of freckles over his nose had exploded in volume and pigmentation and he looked good. He looked so good. 

More than that, it was like he’d brought the sunlight back with him because he’d clearly been somewhere sunny, maybe on a tropical beach somewhere. Somewhere that suited him as a person.

It was like the smell of the ocean entered the room with him.

“Stevie!” Eddie shot up from the couch, discarding his guitar a little carelessly before all but throwing himself at him, arms and legs wrapped around him, clinging on for dear life. “You’re back! You’re here!”

Steve stiffened up momentarily, unusually, before relaxing into it, holding him tight. “I’m here.” He muttered softly into Eddie’s neck.

“Tell me everything sweetheart, how was it? Where did you go? What was it like not to have to run around after an overgrown toddler such as myself-?” Eddie pulled away with a smile, back on solid ground but his grin faltered when he noticed Steve’s own smile had an almost sad tilt to it.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong.” He shrugged off Eddie’s concern. “Went to Hawaii. It was a good time, I’d recommend it to you but I don’t know how well your skin would be able to take that much sun.” He laughed. It was almost performative. He wouldn’t meet Eddie’s eyes anymore. “Met some people. Had some fun. You know, vacation stuff. How were Dustin and Max, could they keep up with you?”

Eddie swallowed and tried not to let the cold wash of emotion completely pull him under. “You- you met some people, huh?” He was going for light. He really was going for light, but it came out just a touch too shaky to really pull it off.

“Yeah.”

“What kind of people?”

“I dunno, people. You know, vacation people.”

Eddie nodded and tried to shove everything, everything he was feeling far, far away. He had no right to feel so heartbroken, he didn’t.

Steve was… he deserved to let loose.

And if that meant meeting some people while away on vacation, that was none of Eddie’s god-damn business. After all, it was nothing compared to what he’d been doing to Steve for years.

“Right.”

Steve frowned at him. “What’s with the face?”

“What face?”

“That face.” He circled his finger around Eddie’s head. “You look like I just killed your dog.”

Eddie shook his head. “Did you find what you were looking for? Out there?”

There was a pause.

“I thought I did.” Steve crossed his arms. “I thought I had… escaped it, I suppose? But,” he sighed, “I think I know now it’s going to be with me forever.”

He looked up again, fixing Eddie with that same sad smile, like Eddie couldn’t see right through him, like he couldn’t tell. But how long had Steve been looking at him like that and how many times had Eddie not seen it?

Steve had thought he'd escaped him.

Or escaped his soul-crushing and unrequited love.

But was it even unrequited?

Last month Eddie would have been sure the answer was an unfortunate yes, it was unrequited.

But now he wasn't so sure.

The last month without Steve had been torture.

Steve had left on vacation to escape Eddie's effect on him, had met up with vacation people and thought it had worked...

Then he came back and...

Eddie needed to sit down.

He dropped himself heavily back down on the couch and put his head in his hands.

“Sounds like some kind of tragic love story.” He muttered into the space between them.

“Yeah.” Steve’s voice was soft. “I think it is.”

Eddie looked up at him, heart breaking in two just from how resigned to his fate Steve sounded and Eddie could feel it. He could feel it, like he knew, like he felt the same, like he’d been… for all this time…

“What were you escaping?” He asked, his voice smaller than he was used to hearing it. It was a dick question, it was a hard question to even get out but he had to know.

He had to be sure.

Because if he was sure then maybe…

Steve looked at him with his big sad eyes and his resigned posture and defeat written all over his figure. “Please don’t ask me that.”

“Stevie-”

“No. Please, Eddie. I… I can’t.”

“Why?” He pushed the word out into the air like it had personally offended him. “Why can’t you just talk to me about this? Why can’t you tell me? We tell each other everything. You’ve never hidden anything from me.”

Steve laughed, some cold, sad, biting thing. “Eddie, I've been hiding this thing from you for years.”

“But, please, Stevie, I need to know. I need you to tell me. Because, I don’t know. Maybe-” Eddie reached out, trying to grasp at Steve’s hand but Steve pulled back violently.

Like Eddie could burn him with just a touch.

“Don’t. Just- I can’t tell you, you know why I can’t tell you!”

“No, I don’t!” And Eddie really didn’t. Why was this so hard, why was it so hard for him to just… admit it?

“Because!” Steve stood in front of him, sudden and frantic, like a man who’d been clinging onto his last threat of patience and sanity and had just lost his grip, hands in his hair and staring at Eddie with wide glistening, pleading eyes. “Because I’d have to leave! I couldn’t stay if I did tell you! It would- it would be unethical and unprofessional-”

“Stevie, you know you’re more to me than an employee.”

“Yes, I do, but…” Steve deflated all at once, the very soul inside him crumpling under the weight of everything. “But what would happen if I did tell you?” He whispered, swallowing around a lump in his throat. “We’d try to continue on as normal but now there’s this thing hanging over every interaction we have from now until forever and you’ll start to get uncomfortable and it’ll be a thing. And you’ll never be able to look at me as just a friend anymore and I’ll get so distracted I won’t be able to do my job and I’ll have to go, for both our sakes and that would kill me, Eddie. I need you in my life like I need fucking air, as fucked up and infuriating as you are, I need you in my life.”

“But,” Eddie was making a valiant effort to will away the lump in his own throat. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d ever felt so unsure about something, like every word had the power to destroy if he picked the wrong one. Like everything around them was ready to shatter like a Prince Rupert’s drop if touched the wrong way. “What if that doesn’t happen? What if… what if we gave it a go…?”

Steve somehow slumped even more, dragging his hands down from his hair to cover his face, another laugh breaking out of his lungs that was clearly mingled up with a sob. “That would be even worse.” He murmured. 

“How could that possibly be worse?! Would it really be so bad to be in a relationship with me?”

“Yes, Eddie!” Steve hissed, glaring at him with red, shiny eyes. “Yes, it would! Because I know you. You don’t do relationships. Any ones you have had you’ve imploded before they go anywhere past semi-serious and I cannot do that. I cannot be given a taste and then just have to go the rest of my life without it because you got bored or self-destructive or realised it wasn’t what you wanted, that I-”

Steve abruptly cut himself off and dug the heels of his hands into his eyes again. “I can’t do it, Eddie. If I just became another notch… I don’t think I’d ever recover. It would destroy me.”

Eddie put his own head in his hands again, ignoring the jerking movements of his bouncing knee. The worst part was that he couldn’t disagree with what Steve had said about his attitude with people, about how he treated those he was with. 

He couldn’t even be angry or defensive about it because it was true. It was so true the both of them knew it was plainly factual, there was no point arguing.

Anyone he’d ever had a relationship with before, he’d either dropped once the shine had worn off, or shoved away using cutting words or sunk himself so deep into drugs and alcohol it was a miracle Steve had ever been able to drag him out.

Because it was always Steve dragging him out. It was always Steve listening to him bitch and moan about how love was for fantasists, no one was ever happy in relationships, having to cut themselves down by half to accommodate someone else, how he’d never catch himself in that trap for as long as he lived, how he’d swear off ever chaining himself down to bullshit monogamy again.

Until the next pretty face or bouncy ass walked by.

Of course Steve would think that about him. Eddie thought that about himself. Believed it about himself until very, very recently, when even the thought of Steve leaving his life forever sent a cold spike of dread and desperation through him.

“Okay,” Eddie rubbed his face. “But, what if… How do I- what if I prove it to you?”

Steve inhaled deeply then exhaled harshly toward the floor and dragged his hands away from his eyes. His face was blotchy and wet and miserable, his eyes were raw red and resigned. 

“Prove what?”

“That I…” Eddie dragged a hand through his hair, gripping on tight. “That I want to be serious about this. That I- if I get a chance, if you give me a chance to have you, that I’m going to keep you. Forever.”

Steve shook his head. “Don’t make promises you can’t keep, Eds.”

“I’ll keep it.” Eddie raised his head, meeting Steve’s eyes again and trying to will his sincerity across the room. “I’ll always keep it with you. If you love me like I suspect you do, I’m gonna work every god-damned day to keep that promise. Because I think I’ve been in love with you for just as long-”

“Please,” Steve’s voice cracked, harsh and painful sounding, “don’t say that if you don’t mean it-”

“I mean it.” He clasped his hands in front of him, almost begging Steve to hear him. To understand just how serious he was. “I swear on everything I hold dear, I mean it. I swear on my guitar I mean it.”

Steve looked so… he looked so hurt. Like everything he’d been hiding from himself, everything he’d been hiding from Eddie for so long, for years was all coursing through him at full force.

Steve crossed his arms over his chest and considered him.

“I’ll think about it.” His voice was quiet, but it wasn’t so despairing as it had been.

Eddie stood. He wanted to get closer, he wanted to wrap Steve up in his arms and never let go, he wanted to make it better but he didn’t dare move any closer.

“What do you need?”

“I don’t know. I think right now I just need a little time. And space. Again. I might have to extend my vacation just for a few more days. To get my head on straight.”

“Yeah, of course.” Eddie exhaled, rubbing a hand over his forehead. “Whatever you need, baby.”

A wounded, painful sound was pulled from Steve’s throat against his will and Eddie flinched backward.

“Jesus, shit. I’m sorry. Fuck, I’m sorry.”

Steve just shook his head, not meeting his eyes anymore. 

“Dustin and Max will be back tomorrow morning.” Steve didn’t raise his eyes again, keeping them firmly on the ground as he picked up his bag.

Eddie could only whisper out a small ‘okay’. He felt like if he said or did anything else, Steve might shatter into a million tiny pieces and he couldn’t- he wouldn’t let that happen.

The same way it had happened a month ago, Eddie watched Steve leave the room, staring at the door long after he’d gone.

But even though it was the same this time, it was also different.

Because now he had a terrible hope building in his chest.

Now he had work to do.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 5 Part 6 AO3

It was Chanel, hello?? It had accessories??

An idea of Steve's yellow suit

And, of course, Rhianna's iconic cape

This is the video I watched to visualise Eddie playing away in his basement studio. Watch it and let your mind wander 🤭 (specifically 1:23 is the part Eddie is playing in the fic)

@lifeisnotsobadonceyoustopcaring, @child-of-cthulhu, @sweetwaterangel, @anaibis, @katytheinspiredworkaholic, @littlewildflowerkitten, @hallucinatedjosten, @estrellami-1, @gregre369, @stxrcrossed186, @novelnovella, @imhereforthelolzdontyellatme, @hellowhatthehellisgoingonhere, @thesuninyaface, @messrs-weasley

[no-thoughts-only-soup]

To Secure / Risk It All

Chapter 8

Aka Curt has another panic attack.

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11

———————————————

It was impossible. It had to be some sort of cruel prank. Because there was no way Chilly Panda was alive.

He wanted to believe she was. That despite all that happened, all evidence saying otherwise, that she had somehow escaped their clutches. Maybe she had somehow called upon her raptors. Maybe she had lived through it, and they hadn’t noticed. Maybe-

“Yeeeaaaaaaas!”

A chorus of cheers erupted throughout the room.

“We’re six now ya’ll!” Den cheered loudly, patting the monitor.

“There is SIX of us and 5 dozen of THEM.” Christian laughed.

Ivan rolled his eyes, though he couldn’t keep a straight face. “Damn, you couldn’t even stay dead?”

- Bitch. -

- 凸(⊙▂⊙✖ ) -

“They couldn’t even kill off Chilly.” Kristine pointed out with a giggle.

“Yeah why the hell did we go through all of that if you’re not even dead?” Christian joked, leaning in closer and tapping on the screen.

Ivan floated next up to him. “Bruh does that mean I died for fucking nothing?”

“Don’t forget Curt having an actual panic attack.” Den pointed over her shoulder at Curt.

At any other time, he would have joined in. Joined in with the laughter. Joined in with the jokes. But it felt like all energy had been sapped away from him, leaving him with just enough to keep standing.

She’s alright. They were still laughing and joking. She isn’t dead. They felt so far away. You didn’t fail her. Everything still felt so heavy.

Den shoved Christian aside. For whatever reason, the action snapped him out of his thoughts. Gathering whatever he still had left, he stepped closer. Kristine took a step aside to let him get closer, and he caught a glimpse of her face.

A smile on her face, but it didn’t reach her eyes.

Was it a pang of guilt? Of remorse for ever helping the Foundation? Was it longing? For being more than a replacement for a lost friend? Was it a feeling of being an outsider? For not being able to understand some of the inside jokes? Or was it a mix of many things?

Curt didn’t know and he chided himself for trying to pry. Those weren’t his feelings to figure out.

“But where are you Chilly? From where are you typing this?”

“Yeah, how the hell do we get out?” Ivan asked.

That was a bit of silence. And finally typing.

- actually… -

Curt felt immense dread in his stomach.

- I’m really dead -

The air around them felt cold. Oppressive.

“Wh-“ Ivan began, but Chilly was already typing again.

- they ran a bunch of tests on me. dunno why and I don’t remember what exactly killed me, but I died. been haunting the facility since -

Curt swallow some spit into his dry throat. “Y-you… they tested you because you’re an SCP like us. To see if you could survive i-if you’re not in a scenario…”

- well clearly not :P -

He couldn’t laugh. He knew she was trying to lighten up the atmosphere, but he couldn’t bring himself to laugh.

He wasn’t alone in that. The closest was a slight, clearly forced smile on some of them.

“So,” Ivan interrupted the silence “are you a ghost like me now?”

- nah it’s different -

- it’s like -

Stop. Backspace.

- well -

Backspace.

- I’m kinda like a more cliché ghost? I can’t talk to u guys outside of this computer, I’m pretty much invisible, I dunno -

Heavy. It felt heavy. The air felt heavy.

A hand grabbed his wrist, grabbing Curt’s attention. He glanced over. Den still had her eyes on the screen, but the hand she had wrapped around his wrist said all that needed to be said. He choose not to address it, letting her keep him grounded.

It allowed him to focus. “Wait, maybe we can fix this. If you join us, maybe you’ll go back to life after we close the scenario.”

“Could work.” Ivan noted. “But we need her body too, right?”

“Chilly, you know what happened to your body?” Den asked her.

Pause.

- not really. I was drugged the fuck up for the whole thing -

No. He refused.

“Kristine,” he turned to her, “do you have any idea where it could be?”

She shifted around a bit, eyes looking in his direction but not really meeting his eyes. “No, I wasn’t allowed near the research stations…”

- curt, arent YOU the b-class? shouldn’t YOU know? -

“Do you think I would ask if I knew!?” He snapped at her, then leaned forward to type at another computer. “Come on, there’s gotta be a way to figure it out…”

The screens flicked from camera to camera, each adding to the growing pit of dread in Curt’s stomach. Every camera he checked, there were armed guards. There had to be something. Anything. They wouldn’t—

“Curt,” Den’s voice called out to him “they probably got rid of her body. I don’t wanna be a downer but—“

“They wouldn’t.” He cut her off. “Her body would be too valuable for that. T-They’d research it…”

“But that’s against the safety rules!” Kristine argued.

“Well clearly Snee doesn’t care about any damn rules!”

Come on, come on! It couldn’t be gone, it should still be there somewhere! He could still fix this, he could-

Christian grabbed his arm. “Dude, stop for a sec.”

Curt pulled his arm back.

“Oi, don’t fucking ignore me.” Christian said, grabbing Curt’s shoulder and forcefully turning him away from the computer. “Listen to me. I know you want to help Chilly, we all do! But we can’t help anyone if we get recaptured. We have to get the hell out!”

“AND LEAVE HER BEHIND!?” Curt roared at him.

Christian flinched from the sudden loud yell, and Curt took the chance to pull his arm away from his grasp. He glared at all of them.

“If we don’t get her out now we may never get that chance again! What the hell is wrong with you guys, am I the only one who fucking cares about her!?”

“Do you?” Christian snapped at him. “Or are you just trying to fix your ‘mistakes’ so you can stop feeling guilty?”

The silence was deafening. A knife wouldn’t be enough to cut through the tension. Everyone’s eyes were on Curt.

He wanted to reply. Make some snapping remark that of course he was doing this for Chilly. That of course he wasn’t doing this for some stupid sense of guilt. For making up to the fact it was his—

But the nasty part within him muted him before he could speak.

He has a point, doesn’t he?

So instead, he turned back to the computer. “…Both. And does it matter, the end result is still the sa—YEOUCH!”

An electric shock went through his hand, not strong enough to numb his arm, but still enough to sting. He shook out his hand. And then he saw Chilly typing.

- curt, leave it. it’s ok -

“Wha- No, its not ok!”

- no really. because, actually… -

There was a long pause.

- I’ve been thinking of taking a break from the group anyways -

He couldn’t breathe.

“Chilly…” Den whispered softly.

- it’s not because of you guys! I dunno how to best explain it, but it’s like, wanting to rediscover myself??? do some soulsearching??? trying to fuck around on my own and seeing what happens? if that makes sense??? -

Ivan raised an eyebrow. “You sure it’s not because of all the bullying?”

The computer vibrated with laughter.

- LMAOOOOO U COULDNT BULLY ME OUT IF YUO TRIED ಥ‿ಥ -

Den grinned and tried to nudge Ivan’s ghostly form. “We’d bully you out first.”

- absolutely (๑´• .̫ •ू`๑) -

- but fr don’t worry about me. ( ͒꒪̛ཅ꒪̛ ͒) if anything I can now go literally fucking anywhere I want and if I wanna be alive again we’ll just infiltrate this bitch -(๑☆‿ ☆#)ᕗ -

Den’s eyes sparkled. “Dude you can haunt a Starbucks.”

- KSNDBKSBSVKSJDBS SCRATCH ALL PLANS IM DOING THAT ⊹⋛⋋( ՞ਊ ՞)⋌⋚⊹ -

As Den, Ivan and Chilly laughed and teased, Curt felt like he was slipping. Everything felt like it was fading away. Their voices felt like they were melting together. The room felt like it was tilting.

No, no, no, he couldn’t fall into another attack now! They were on borrow time, at any moment the guards could barge in and—

But he was losing control. He was losing control. He was losing control. Losing control. Losing control. Control. Control. Control control control control control control control “Hey.” control control control control control control control control control control control control “hey!”

Christian moved into his vision. “Do you need to sit down for a moment?”

Curt stopped, his breath still uneven. His eyes flickered towards the others. They were still talking, but he caught the occasional glances they snuck at him. He stumbled back a little, getting some distance from the situation.

Almost without a single sound, Christian joined him, gently helping him breathe through it. Bit by bit, he pushed down the fear and panic once more.

He was definitely gonna throw up once they got out. If.

No. He steadied himself. We are going to get out. We will get out… or die trying.

And with a last deep breath, he locked eyes with Christian. The question went unspoken, but so did the answer. He stepped forward, interrupting the conversation between the others.

“It won’t be long before Snee finds us. We need a plan, stat.”

Ivan bit his lip. “We can’t get out through any of the exits. Maybe we could try a window.”

“We’d first need to get out of the panic room though.” Den pointed out. “Chilly, are there any guards heading in our direction?”

The computer was still for a moment.

- yeah, there’s a few getting close. doubt y’all are getting out without a fight -

Den crackled her knuckles upon hearing that, but Curt cut her off. “There is no way we can barge through so many. It’s too dangerous.”

“Do we have a choice though?” Ivan questioned.

“Wait, wait, wait!” Kristine suddenly shouted, raising her hand in the air like a desperate student. “If we can pretty much create whatever we want, why don’t we just make a teleporter?”

There was a silence of more than 10 seconds as everyone gaped at her.

Curt sunk to his knees, covering his face with his hands. “OH MY GOOOOOOOD!”

Everyone around him descended into hysterical laughter, Den and Christian even throwing in a “looooser!”, and even Chilly displaying a large L on the screen.

“WHY DIDNT I THINK OF THAT WHYYYYYYYYYY!”

“Ok, ok, I am holding this one against you dude.” Christian laughed.

Curt sighed deeply. “I am so fucking done y’all.

The laughter finally faded enough for Curt to stand up, sigh, and look at Kristine.

“Alright Kristine, how do you wanna do this?”

She thought, but only for a split second. “Can our teleporter be a 2004 Toyota Accord Sedan?”

It immediately prompted another round of giggles and chuckled, and even Curt felt the corners of his mouth move. “Sure, sure. Everyone, stand back a bit.”

Once everyone had made room, Curt spoke: “Alright, so Kristine summons her trusty teleporting 2004 Toyota Sedan…”

The car popped into existence, pushing all of them back even further.

“Shotgun!” Den immediately yelled, followed by Christian pouting over it. Kristine cheered and made her way over to the driver’s seat.

Curt was about to join, but then paused. No. He had to say it. He turned to Chilly instead.

“Chilly,” he began, his heart feeling as heavy as lead “I know I’m not directly responsible for what happened to you. But maybe if I had stepped up sooner, figured it out sooner, then maybe we could have escaped before your death. I’m…” his voice cracked “I’m sorry. I’m sorry I didn’t prevent this.”

There was a break in the storm of laughter. All eyes were focused on him and Chilly. Waiting for what she’d say.

And she finally typed.

- BITCH DO YOU NOT THINK I WOULDNT FUCKING HAUNT YOUR ASS IF I BLAMED YOU EVEN A LITTLE???? -

“Wh-“

- CURT FFS HOW LONG HAVE WE KNOWN EACH OTHER??? HOW LONG HAVE WE BEEN BULLYING EACH OTHER??? DO U SERIOUSLY NOT THINK I WOULDNT TAKE THIS EXCUSE???? -

“I…I…” he stuttered.

- curt, I don’t blame u for shit so stop being such a sad sack about it -

She didn’t blame him. She wasn’t mad. She could’ve been. She should have been.

But she wasn’t.

- not even I’m blaming you so stop blaming urself already dumbass -

“Chilly…”

He took a deep breath… and smiled. “Thank you.”

Curt suddenly felt something warm against his chest, wrapping itself around him. And even though he knew how stupid he’d look, he hugged back.

It was gone before he knew it, but Christian next to him shifted, grinning ear to ear as held up one crooked arm, akin to how he would sling his arm around his neck. “Girl I better hear on the news how you haunted the White House.”

“You gotta get on an episode of Ghost Hunters.” Den laughed, and then grinned as Chilly’s spirit hugged her next.

When she moved on to Ivan, Curt could finally get a glimpse of her.

She was happy.

Ivan ruffled her head, or at least that’s what he intended, complaining how he was gonna get the full buttmonkey treatment. “Now I don’t got you to divert some of it, they’re all gonna focus on me now.”

And finally, Kristine held up her hand, only a little awkwardly. From the way she beamed, Chilly gave her the high five.

“I’ll bully them in your place.” She proudly vowed.

There was a quick moment of warmth again as she quickly phased through all of them…

And she was gone.

Curt exhaled slowly. And jumped as a loud BANG sounded from the door.

“Ok we gotta get the fuck outta here.”

“Kristine take the wheel!” Den yelled as she jumped into the passenger’s seat, Christian still complaining as he got into the back.

Kristine got into the driver’s seat with a laugh, and Curt went to sit right behind her. Ivan of course couldn’t actually enter the car, but he hang onto the roof anyways.

The door broke down just as Kristine started the car. Curt flipped them off. And a second later, the car and all those inside vanished from the room, and from the facility.

——————————————————-

I was gonna end the chapter somewhere else originally, but I’ve tortured you guys with my absences enough.

Wil edit properly once I got time.

[ospreyeamon]

on the prevalence of bounty hunters in the gffa

I’m not sure George Lucas intended bounty hunters to become as prominent as they are in the Star Wars universe. It might just be a consequence of Boba Fett Armour Rad ✨, like the invention of the Mandalorians. However, thinking about  the Galactic Republic, it does make sense that there would be a lot of bounty hunters running around fulfilling a particular societal need.

The Galactic Republic’s structure is difficult to pin down because it doesn’t have a clear real world parallel. While it’s usually the United Nations or USA that are brought up, I suggest that its closest structural equivalent is the European Union; single currency, open boarders, high degree of internal autonomy while members are still meant to be bound by the laws and rulings of the higher courts and legislature, multitude of languages and cultures, states have the right cede unilaterally without requiring permission from the central authority. There are still differences though, and the one relevant to this discussion is that we aren’t shown a Republic equivalent of Europol, or the better-known Interpol. During the prequels era there are the Republic Judicial Forces and Jedi Order, but both these organisations provide specialist and crisis assistance rather than dealing with the day-to-day dealings of local planetary and system law enforcement systems. Nobody is calling the Jedi because someone skipped off-planet rather than front-up to court after crashing their speeder through a sixth-story window. Even if local law enforcement were inclined to do such a thing it wouldn’t be permissible, because the number of Jedi and Judicials is tiny compared to the overall population of the Republic.

I think the Republic logically should have an equivalent of Interpol, which I call the Intersector Security Bureau so it can keep its acronym when it is transformed into the Imperial Security Bureau. Given how easy it appears for anybody who owns a private starship to planet-hop undetected, facilitating information exchange must be hugely important. Still, the fact that so far as I can recall the ISB is never mentioned before the Republic becomes the Empire suggests that its reach is limited before Palpatine starts beefing it up. The Jedi do a lot of investigating but mostly rely on their own resources or liaise with the local planetary authorities.

There are a few reasons why an early ISB space!Interpol equivalent might have less prominence and reach than RL!Interpol. One is that it is affected by the same resources sap as the Judicial Forces; losing work to the Jedi Order and funding to local planetary or sector law enforcement. Another is that the Republic’s diverse array of species and cultures creates a complicated environment for hashing out the cultural consensus necessary for the level of understanding and trust required for agreeing to carry out other agencies’ arrest warrants. For example, the Republic’s de facto age of majority – the minimum age at which a person can hold Republic public office, like a become a Senator – is sixteen. This is not an age of majority that member systems of the Republic are required to adhere to in any way; having species with wildly different lifespans and lifecycles like wookiees, trandoshans, and ruurians makes trying to enforce a single age of majority a terrible idea. But that means that you have a planet like Naboo, where Padme Amidala can be employed in the political office of Princess of Theed when she is nine, under the same government as Alderaan, where the heir to the throne doesn’t step up into their full public role until they come of age at sixteen. Other points of difference – attitudes to gambling, recreational drug usage, corporal punishment, reasonable person tests, etc. – create a plethora of friction points between legal jurisdictions.

Then there’s the issue that many of the planets in the Republic aren’t going to trust the governments of every other planet in the Republic. RL!Interpol is facing controversy regarding the accusation that some countries like China have been submitting warrants for arrest on people who are actually political dissidents. In the Republic that translates to, for example, corporate-controlled planets putting out warrants on whistle-blowers calling out the companies’ fraud, environmental regulation violations, debt slavery, etc.

So, if you can’t rely on intersector law enforcement cooperation to retrieve your dangerous driver before any more speeders become wedged through the windows of high-rise apartments, what do you do? You put a bounty on them.

This implies that mainstream socially respectable bounty hunting is quite different from the “I can bring you in hot or I can bring you in cold” business the Mandalorians engage in. Reputable law enforcement agencies will only want their bounties hot and minimally injured; the idea is to get criminals back so they can be tried and punished in accordance with your law. And what if a bounty hunter screws up the bounty you posted and grabs the wrong person? If they’re alive you can stick them on a shuttle back to the planet they were kidnapped from, but if they’re dead that’s a PR nightmare and now you need to chase after that bounty hunter to charge them for murder.

Looking back a couple of millennia from the Post-Ruusan Republic to the Old Republic, many of these forces are still in play. One example of a deficit in law enforcement cooperation that I found particularly memorable was Miel Muwn of the Sullustan Constable Brigade from the Smuggler class story, who personally travelled to Coruscant in pursuit of the stolen Murustavan Ruby where he deputised two Very Upstanding Lawful Citizens to aid him rather than collaborate with the Coruscanti authorities.

Additionally, the division of the galaxy between the Republic and the Sith Empire creates another reason for those governments to work through bounty hunters. Because the Republic and the Empire are either in a state of hot or cold war, they obviously aren’t cooperating on issues like intergalactic crime. If either power wants to arrest someone who has fled into the other’s territories, the most legal least likely to spark violent conflict option available to them is to hire a third party (it’s still not very legal or unlikely to end in violence). Hence, bounty hunters everywhere.

…there are so many ways that this dysfunctional excuse for a system would produce bad outcomes.

[brandwhorestarscream]

Tumblr might’ve eaten the original version of this from… at minimum a few weeks ago, so I’m throwing it back in.

Somehow, for whatever reason, Preceptor and Brainstorm find their way to Unicronia while the scanners the Unicronians use to detect mecha like usual Cybertronians is down. But instead of landing somewhere kinda safe like Lushus’s forest, Preceptor and Brainstorm accidentally land in the Lust Forest. They notice the planet feels weird but they jus think it’s because it’s an alien planet and not dark Energon related. Some of the sapient plants of the forest notice them and they don’t realize said plants are seeing them as food because “WOW NEW PLANTS”.

You can guess what happens from there. (Interfacing… and overloads… yea. Transfluid-eating plants.)

Ahhh yes, the Jungles of Lust. My old friend

For anyone not in the loop, there's an entire planet on this blog born of reincarnated Unicron; himself, his 4 asexually produced children, and 7 grandchildren are revered as the pantheon of this world, modelled after the 4 horsemen if the apocalypse and the 7 deadly sins

Anyway

PERCY AND BRAINSTORM LANDING IN THE JUNGLES OF LUST 😍 their ship landing cleared out some of the immediate surrounding foliage (did they crash? That would make this even spicier), so they're safe for a moment. They get out what they can--the scanners don't indicate anything super dangerous right away--and start working to establish a little base camp. This planet is weird, giving off the strangest vibes: but everything around them is formed of inorganic substances, metal and polymers and silicone and crystals, so they know it's a Cybertronian descended planet.

Uhhh warning for horny robots under the cut, this kinda got away from me

Brainstorm is over the moon, running around gathering samples because half of these materials are unrecognizable to his systems and he's talking a mile a minute about tests he wants to run, potential future applications, new energy sources, etc, etc. Percy is mostly blocking him out as he takes a more practical approach and catalogues everything he can see right away. He's so focused on his task that it takes him a klik or two to realize Brainstorm has gone quiet, and when he turns around? Finds his conjunx deep in the clutches of one of the Jungle's predatory plants.

The flora of the Lascivious Unicronus's lands range from normal plants to mildly sentient, and almost all of them are carnivorous in some way. Some are vampiric and feed on energon or whole bodies, but thankfully, that's not what has Brainstorm. The others, as they are creations of Lust, feed specifically on transfluid. So whenever someone is ensnared they're in for a wild ride: Percy sees Brainstorm bound and gagged, slippery, sticky vines and cables wrapped all around his arms and legs, squirming under his panels to get at his spike and valve. There's another in his mouth, forcing him to drink the plant's sticky sap--a potent aphrodisiac. Brainstorm is a mess, thick tentacles in his valve and another wrapped around his spike, lust-inducing drugs blasting through his veins. He's a moaning, drooling mess, already near incoherent as the plant forces him to overload for the third time in as many minutes.

Perceptor rushes to try and get him free, but the plants immediately zero in on him too: another warm body ripe for milking, transfluid reserves topped up at full. He's swiftly wrapped up too and taken into the folds. The plant is kind enough to let them face each other, though if it's sheer dumb luck or it actually letting them be face to face is up for debate 🤭 once they're full of aphrodisiac and have stopped struggling, instead just moaning and squealing and rolling into the stimulation, their mouths are freed. Brainstorm immediately lurches forward to kiss his mate with reckless abandon, and Percy follows suit. They're making out feverishly, as well as they can while the vines ravage their bodies and force every drop of transfluid out of them.

Once they've been sucked dry they're promptly dropped to the forest floor, whimpering and twitching, barely able to move. They were trapped with the plants for megacycles on end, and were fucked so thoroughly there's not a chance in hell they're gonna be walking anytime soon 🤭

[cresent2003]

First time

Victor Creed (Sabretooth) x In heat! Reader

Unedited

_–_–_–_–_–_–_–_–_–_–_–_–_–_–_–_–_–_–_

Mara never lived a normal childhood.

Her father was an insane sadist who trapped her mother to get his first test subject.

Stryker was never a father to her.

She was like her mother.

A feral but even if she was 85% of an animal she was still sweet and kind.

She was a ray of sunshine but her father made sure to destroy her at a young age leaving her afraid of him.

He would cut her claws so when they would retract she was left screaming in pain.

He would try to erase her mutant DNA as he wanted her broken so it would be easier to make her into a loyal weapon.

When she became a teenager it only got worse.

He would do tests on her and use drugs to stop her eyes from shirts and bleach to cover her leopard spots.

He said it was all because he loved her and wanted her to fit in but she hated his lies.

She could hear his pulse and knew he was Lying every time but was too afraid of what he would do if she disobeyed.

At fifteen her mom died in one of his experiments.

He wanted to make her indestructible but she died during the procedure.

After that, there was no one to protect Mara and that was the opening Stryker needed.

But out of everything he did there was one thing that was beyond cruel.

It was completely inhuman.

He would give her pills to suppress her heat cycles.

He would have them down her throat and then would throw her in a cold room.

He had done this since she was sixteen and after a while, she stopped getting her heat.

Years later Mara stood in her father's office as he kitted a scarf with her claws after finally growing them back.

Dried blood filled her nail bed but she no longer felt the stinging.

Suddenly John walked into the room.

"Hey your dad needs you" he said.

"Ok," she said softly before rushing to the training room where the mutant team her father created was.

"Got her," John said.

"Good.

Mara come here now" Stryker ordered.

Mara walked to him as the team looked at her with sad eyes.

Everyone except Victor who had been planning to make a move on her when he could get away from Stryker.

"As I was saying, gentleman.

You will be going to a jungle in the Amazon to find a tree I need the sap from.

Mara will be joining you" Stryker said.

Mara froze.

She would die out there.

But maybe that was what her father wanted.

"Hey wait a second.

We're not going to take her there" Logan said.

"She will die quickly," Wade said.

Mara whimpered before feeling her heart stop as her father laughed.

"You all really need to train your brain a little more.

She won't be included in the mission but will be staying in a clearing.

I will not have you here disturbing me while you on your heat" Stryker said.

"Father please" Mara said.

"Shut it.

I am your father and I make decisions for you" he said.

"Ok hold the fuck up.

She can't be out there while on heat.

She'll be too weak" John said.

"Stop.

I'll go.

Ok, I'll go" Mara said.

"Good.

You'll be leaving now" Stryker said before walking away.

"This is a bad idea," Fred said.

"I'll be fine.

I'll just take suppressants" she said.

"Suppressants?" Logan said.

"Yeah.

I've been taking them since I was sixteen.

If I take them you won't notice anything" Mara said.

"You're not taking any damn suppressants" Victor growled as he spoke up for the first time.

"Victor," Logan said.

"Get on the aircraft and leave the pills here" Victor said causing her to shiver.

He had to stop himself from tearing Stryker apart when he heard the things he was saying about Mara.

She was so kind and caring and all he wanted to do was protect her.

He would stay by her side the entire mission if needed just to keep her feeling secure while going through the most vulnerable time for a female feral.

She stood there afraid of what he was saying.

She had never experienced her heat cycle before and it scared her.

"Hey, you alright buttercup?" Wade said.

"This is a bad idea.

I've never-" she said.

"Never what?" Logan asked.

"Nevermind.

Let's just go before I make myself sick" she said.

They all got on the aircraft as she sat with her knees pressed against her chest.

Bradley sat next to her as she looked at the pill bottle left on a table.

"Hey?

Don't go and get them.

They do more harm than good" Bradley said.

"I don't know what will happen if I don't take them," she said.

The aircraft lifted as she looked forward.

"What were you saying before?" Fred asked as everyone listened in.

"I rather not talk about it" she said.

"No offense but if we're gonna be stuck with you for the entirety of your cycle we kind of need to know," John said.

"You all didn't need to know.

You can't smell my pheromones.

They won't drive you crazy.

I'll be staying away anyways so it won't matter now can we drop it" she said.

"Sooooo when you were younger did your father get a feral to help you know?" Wade said.

"No.

What about suppressants don't you understand?" she asked as she started to get frustrated.

"You look a little nervous?

Is it because whatever you're not telling us will make or break this mission?" Wade said.

"Fine, you wanna know that bad.

I've never experienced a heat cycle.

I've never had help for it because Stryker threw me in a room for fifteen days before drugging me so wouldn't be able to rest" she said loudly.

"Are you happy now?" She asked.

"So you're a virgin?" Wade asked.

"Wade, please.

I don't want to hurt you but I really want to tear off your head" she said.

"I would just heal," Wade said.

Suddenly Victor got up before jamming his claws into Wade's eyes.

"Shut the hell up" he growled as she looked at him.

He then walked to her "Move" he said towards Bradley.

Bradley moved as Victor sat next to her.

"I'm really scared" she whispered.

He began to stroke her hair causing her to melt as she softly began to purr.

"Just relax.

I'll stay with you and I will keep you safe" he said.

She looked at him as he presented himself as a potential mate.

She leaned into his touch before placing her head on his shoulder using the shoulder pads in his coat as a pillow.

She had always felt safe around him.

She never understood why and she still didn't but liked that he was the one who was going to help her.

Once they got to the clearing Mara sat on the grass as everything started to hit her at once.

All the testosterone was causing her heat to speed up.

She looked at Logan before whimpering as her body began to burn.

"Ok everyone follow me.

We're going to a separate clearing" Logan said.

"Thank you" she whispered before laying down.

She curled into a ball as Victor wandered off somewhere.

She whimpered as her body heat increased.

It was the most uncomfortable thing she had ever felt.

She sat up before whimpering as her body fought against her.

Her claws grew longer as her eyes glowed.

She cried out as the pain came back.

She felt as if her abdomen was on fire as ten minutes felt like ten hours.

She sat there for forty minutes before Victor came back.

She looked at him before whimpering.

"It hurts," she said.

"It will until you give your body what it wants," he said as he knelt down.

She crawled to him before placing her head on his chest finding comfort when she was close to him.

"I just didn't understand why my father didn't want me to feel all this.

I could have been used to it" she said.

"Once you go through your first heat you become a woman.

He wants you to stay as his little girl" he said.

She looked at him "I don't want to go back there, Victor.

He scares me" she said.

"Leave it to me and I can find you an opening," he said.

"Only if you come with," she said.

"Sure," he said as she showed signs of her trying to attract him.

Everything she said involved Victor.

She nuzzled into his chest as she felt his heartbeat.

"I made you something to help you feel more comfortable," he said.

"What?" she asked.

He lifted her causing her to yelp.

He carried her deeper into the forest before putting her down in front of a dent he stuffed with blankets and pillows that smelt like him.

"Give in to your animal instincts," he said as he rubbed her arms.

She went inside the den before nuzzling into the pillows and blankets.

He made this for her.

She purred as arousal soaked through her child-like panties.

She breathed in his scent before moaning as she began to release sex hormones.

He watched her before realising what she was trying to do.

"Victor," she said.

"What do you need?" he asked.

She growled into one of the pillows as the burning got worse.

"Make it go away.

Please it hurts" she said as her dress rode up showing her ruined panties.

He took off his coat as the hormones and pheromones she was releasing caused him to go into his rut.

She crawled to him before kissing him softly.

She was completely submissive to him as her cunt throbbed.

She then turned around before taking off her panties.

Mara placed her head on the pillows as she presented her dripping cunt only making his need to breed her to grow.

He was so much older than her.

She was only eighteen and he was god knows how old yet his experiences and long life made her feel safe.

She wiggled her hips she moaning loudly as he began to eat her out.

She dug her claws into the pillows as she panted.

It felt incredible as his rough tongue made her scream out as she came.

He didn't stop as he tasted her while taking in her scent.

She tasted sweet as he licked up her cunt causing her to let out pornographic moans.

She had never been touched by anyone like this.

She hadn't even touched herself before.

Everything was new and exciting as Mara moaned loudly.

He made her cum again as her entire body trembled.

He left a soft kiss on her clit before tearing off his clothes as she began to touch herself.

Victor then flipped her before slipping into her.

She purred from the feeling as he nipped at her neck before biting down claiming her as his cock swelled inside her.

He groaned as she came again and again as her body did everything to get him to knot inside her.

His thrusts were erratic but euphoric as she threw her head back before gasping as she felt his cock swell double its size as he shot his cum inside her.

They had successfully mated as he turned her so she was on her side before wrapping his arks around her knowing he would stay inside her for thirty minutes.

"Feel better?" he asked.

She nodded as the exhaustion hit her.

"Thank you Victor," she said.

"Don't thank me.

I will always be there for you.

Whatever you need I will be there" he said.

He looked down before smirking as he noticed Mara fast asleep cuddled into his bare chest.

"You're finally mine," he said before kissing her head.

[reginrokkr]

𝐂𝐋𝐕𝐈𝐈. Khaenri'ah is a nation at disadvantage geographically-speaking for three reasons: the lack of sunlight poses an inconvenience for the growth of flora and health of the fauna and humans alike, the proximity with the Abyss adds a layer where makes life be incompatible given its vital energy being continuously sapped due to its property as precipitating all life to death and, regardless of their pride, being disconnected with other nations offers a new list of difficulties.

Born from the necessity not only to conserve products imported from other nations that would be picked for Khaenri'ah's consumption, but to be able to reproduce them and create new forms of life to replicate flora and fauna for nourishment, health and other reasons, Khemia was born and honed to the point where it became the source of life that the location was unable to provide via natural means. Later on, this art would acquire other more ambitious purposes such as human creation. Nevertheless, while partly used for health purposes, Khemia can be considered a double-edged sword if mastered by those with ill intentions that seek to experiment and find new means to control the Abyss, as there was an ingrained thought among those obsessed the most that should they master the Abyss themselves, then they can rule the world and even defeat the gods.

Which leads to the issue of illnesses and infestations. Considering that one of the requirements at creation via Khemia is one's imagination (as it was with the creation of automatons), not only the location by itself close to the Abyss and the lack of sunlight are strong reasons for susceptibility of illnesses, but people that go unchecked can also have their hand at adding to these present problems for their own nefarious reasons, thus toy with the population's health, a problem that is being actively handled by the military to ensure the civilians' safety. Ill intentions aside and in view that the Abyss, for the greatest part, is responsible for the ailments, there are those who had to subject its polluting energy to experimentation in order to create drugs and medicines to withstand it and later on be tested by volunteers, which may or may not have been another relevant reason why illnesses came to happen in Khaenri'ah.

Towards its last moments and in a moment when all of this has already been tested and controlled ceased being a problem. Nevertheless, given its many years of life span, the microorganisms' tolerance to these medicines grew and thus new drugs had to be created, thus repeating the cycle albeit with less risks and stricter controls.

Monsters of the Abyss also contribute greatly to Khaenri'ah's integrity, both due to their natural presence in their own environment and emerging from it with bloodlust to consume life and because of experimentations with the Abyss a sector of the population made, including the aperture to the realm of the beasts, summoning and creations of these monsters that were tested in Sumeru as well. The military, as it happens with the control over unethical experiments and practises with medicines and nourishment, is actively tasked to deal with these monsters.

[amhnationwide]

Dilute urine drug screen for SAP

New Post has been published on https://amhnationwide.com/drug-testing/dilute-urine-drug-screen-for-sap/

Dilute urine drug screen for SAP

categories: #DrugTesting tags: #DiluteUrineDrugScreen, #PersonalUrineDrugTest, #SubstanceAbuseProfessionalDrugTesting, #TestForDrugsSAP, #UrineDrugTest

[welcome-to-oslov]

Wow.

Poor Tilrey. Can we ever say that enough?! 😭

Reading this prequel-to-the-prequel one-shot, I'm thinking again of Tilrey in the future, when his son Ceill was just a few months older than Tilrey is here: a schoolboy soon to take his E-Squareds. Ceill had been hanging out at the Sanctioned, and Tilrey learns Ansha plied Ceill with alcohol/sap to get him wasted.

"No," Tilrey frantically thought. "No—no, no one can do that to Ceill, that can't happen to Ceill, no. No..."

Only when Einara & Kai see him stunned/freak out & quickly explain it wasn't for *that* reason (Ansha's motive, rather, was to sabotage Ceill's test performance) did Tilrey come back to himself. He realizes he's shaking, his heart's pounding, he's lightheaded—his hands are still trembling.

He doesn't like to think about these first days we've just now seen, how he was tricked to ever come to Redda in the first place ('tricked', as if he could've stopped it), drugged up and defenseless. But the second he was confronted, a lifetime later, by that happening to Ceill, his body and heart (and love for Ceill) betrays him. 😭

Oh wow, I didn’t consciously make that connection, but yes!! When Tilrey reacts with that intense anxiety, he’s flashing back to what happened to him and dreading it could happen to Ceill. He’s been dreading it to some degree ever since he realized how much his son physically resembles him.

That’s why every step that Ceill takes out of line—making friends with Aleks in Thurskein, visiting the Brothel—disturbs him so much. Because Tilrey made just one “mistake”—went to that Dissident meeting—and his whole life was shattered, his sense of safety ripped away. He knows rationally that this isn’t going to happen to Ceill, with his Upstart mom and legal dad. Even if Ansha succeeded in sabotaging Ceill’s test performance and he got Lowered, they would and could still protect him. But the situation still throws Tilrey’s body back into that state of panic. And he can’t be entirely frank with Ceill about why he’s overreacting. 😢

[bishiglomper]

I was in bed all day. Just totally sapped of energy. And flipping between freezing and sweating 😣

I attempted to get up. Which was me propping myself up into a sitting position until i was awake enough to leave. But it just devolved into my dozing and sinking lower and lower. Pfft. I wasnt successful

And then DAD called. I was expecting him to at some point when i learned mom told him about my heart issue. 😅 he gets a stick up his butt about my health whenever something happens.

I told him I'm trying to be good and i see flippin' every specialist they have and they dont ever have answers for me. And hes giving me a hard time. We both gradually got loud and frustrated at eachother until his wife (they do speakerphone) starts ripping him a new one like "ITS HARD TO BE A WOMAN IN THE MEDICAL SYSTEM, THEY DON'T KNOW WHATS WRONG WITH YOU AND YOU'RE NOT LISTENING TO HER."

And I had gotten teary and i was just like "....YEAH." 🥺

"Good job, see, you made your daughter cry"

Lmao 😂 i cried more because I was touched but honestly it probably would have taken only another moment of yelling before frustration ran out and i just broke. Mom hates this womans guts but i cant help but love her. She has her own autoimmune issues so SHE UNDERSTANDS. And she puts dad in his place when he gets a bug up his butt.

He really wants me to go up there and make me be seen by one of his doctors which im all for but insurance is fickle. He may need to pay out of pocket for something like that.

None of my doctors actually talk to eachother. And it seems like even if i go to a "specialist" they're not special enough. 🙄 still waiting to see if/when i can see the rhythm specialist to be tested for pots.

Theres always something that makes me go "no it cant be pots, I don't do/have this particular symptom" but someone told me i could have it with high BP, which was one of the things... And i know thats been up and down. So dad decided hes gonna send me a blood pressure machine.

He was thrilled when i said i would totally check it all the time. I love knowing wtf my body is doing. I dont check my bloodsugar enough but when im curious about it enough I'll check it all the time. I just need that extra motivation lol. told him ive been using the pulse ox. Now we just need to see what my bp is doing.

Honestly if i thought i could just walk into the nearest building with a cuff id do it at least once a day. But I dont think they'd do it without question.

He wants me to experiment with my drugs. Like going off them. I wanna do the BP tilt table thing but im with mom, i dont really wanna do it without a doctor knowing about it. But if i have my own cuff, then i can bring data to them 👀

[autumnalwalker]

Empty Names - 6 - Background Checks

Author's Note: And now for a brief rundown of the party's backstories, albeit filtered through the lens of Sullivan being a dismissive cynical jerk. The narration may be third-person, but unreliability due to the influence of the current PoV character is fun to play with. Word Count: 3,024 Content Warnings: References to dead bodies, faking the death of a child, what may or may not have been a kidnapping, and supernatural factors causing transitioning to go angst-inducingly slow.

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For all its gothic gloom during the night, Bridgewood Manor is surprisingly well-lit during the day.  Mostly this is due to Carnette having installed large windows looking out onto alien landscapes in most of the rooms and halls not directly connected to the building’s outer shell as a flex on visitors, but - much like her - that is quite literally neither here nor there at the moment.  No, Sullivan’s gaze is set on his laptop.  The vista behind him is only worthy of his attention insofar as it’s creating an annoying glare on his screen, and even that he’s pointedly ignoring.  To move from his overstuffed chair to a seat with less glare would be letting the window win, and he’s not about to concede to an inanimate object in a contest of wills.  

And so Sullivan commences his last-minute review of files with the sun shining indirectly in his eyes.  It’s been two weeks since he agreed to his friend’s latest ill-conceived venture, and every day of it’s been busy.  Now his friend is out wrapping up details with a client for an initial test run job - he refuses to call it a quest - and wants to bring in the new team - definitely not an adventuring party - tomorrow.  Of course, the new office space - no way in any hell is he calling it “the guildhall” - still isn’t ready yet so now he has to play host.  After spending the past three days getting the full staff of cleaning and maintenance constructs up and running again to make the manor presentable once more he finally has a free moment to go back over the compiled dossiers of the newest round of poor saps to get pulled in by his friend’s wide-eyed idealism.  It’s an exercise that’s one part risk management and one part intimidation tactic.  Nothing like casually alluding to secrets to get fools in line.

The musclehead’s first on the list.  Eris.  First Backstage encounter at seventeen, dropped out of the local community college, got a job as a long-haul trucker - plenty of liminal spaces for spooks to slip through in that line of work - shortly thereafter, and has been making waves in the monster hunter community ever since.  After two years of that she found Crossherd and for some reason got herself a day job with the city’s sanitation department.  An odd choice to have a day job at all for a hunter, but then again Sullivan’s seen enough sewer monsters and bodies left in dumpsters to figure there’s probably more overlap between the two professions than anyone wants to admit.

Only limited contact with her family or anyone else on set, so cleanup should be easy if she bites the dust.

Sullivan starts flicking through an archive of gathered images.  High school yearbook, crime scene footage, commercial driver’s license, group photos pulled from other hunters’ social media accounts, security camera stills, Dog Park volunteer outreach materials, medical records, discreet surveillance from paid informants.  His friend wasn’t kidding about the autogenesis; that’s not a physique anyone’s pulling off without either magic or a damn-near lethal amount of drugs, and if the collateral damage to buildings and vehicles from some of these aftermath shots of hunts are anything to go by, she’s even stronger than she looks.  Sullivan chuckles to himself.  It looks like she’s living up to her moniker with the messes she leaves behind.  On the other hand, he’s yet to be able to turn up anyone with a bad word to say about her, so hopefully his friend’s right in their own assessment of her.

Still though, he can’t help but wonder if that body is a manifestation of pride or self-loathing.  The last thing they need is her getting pushed over the edge by something and going full monster.  That almost never happens, but it’s always ugly when it does.

All in all, the kind of person Sullivan would expect to reply to his invitation for purchase requests with a gym’s worth of exercise equipment and a small armory’s worth of weapons.  Oh, and what’s this?  A follow-up email adding an armored van to the list.  Why not?  She did bring him that fascinating and delicious-looking specimen the other day.  

Sullivan makes a note to call his car guy later, mentally files away Eris as “dumb, friendly, expendable wrecking ball and meat shield” and then switches over to the techie’s profile.  Lacuna.  He’d thought the name sounded familiar when his friend told him about Eris’s recommendation.  As it turned out, she’d been one of the victims on the penultimate job the two of them had worked before their spat.  He’d say “small world” but he’s always gone back and forth on the nature of coincidence.  

But as for the file, it’s usually been his experience that the less his research turns up the more likely there’s a secret to be found, but in this case he’s starting to suspect this woman really is just that boring.  Schooling with no records of extracurriculars from elementary through university.  No social life to speak of.  Half a dozen social media accounts with no posts.  A few profiles on job hunt sites.  Employment records with a software startup that was never more than moderately successful.  And then a reset of the same boring stuff all over again after falling Backstage.  A job at a similar company on Crossherd doing similar work but with paratech.  A few purchases of books on witchcraft followed by attending a single seminar then never returning - the usual sign of a wannabe mage realizing they have no potential.  Still no social life, save for the informants looking into Eris spotting the two of them together on a semi-regular basis.

Just two tidbits that stuck out to Sullivan in the end that he’d made a note of at the bottom of the profile a few days ago to follow up on later.  The first was that the paratech company this Lacuna had been working for was bought out a month back and RevaTech, the new parent company, had scrubbed the public records of whatever their new acquisition had been working on.  Suspicious on the surface but pretty standard fare for RevaTech, and they almost certainly would have slapped anyone that didn’t stay on with a geas-enforced NDA, so it wasn’t like she’d be able to say or do anything to make her old work relevant.

The second part was her family.  Well, not the immediate family.  Just a couple of normies for parents that, if phone records and airplane tickets were anything to go by, she still keeps in touch with.  No sign of a Masquerade breach though.  Good luck to her keeping that up.  The extended family on the other hand, now that had a few names that were giving Sullivan a niggling feeling of recognition.  Strange, but with everything else pointing toward Lacuna having no prior Backstage knowledge before a few years ago, he’d designated further research low priority.

As for her physical profile, a classic example of the other side of autogenesis.  A scarecrow of sickly skin and bone hiding under baggy clothes.  The exact kind of exaggeration you’d expect to manifest in a shut-in nerd with confidence issues.  Definitely not someone they’d be getting any fieldwork out of.  Looks like the autogenesis might even be holding back her transition.  That does manage to get a rare twinge of sympathy from him.  He’d not had that problem himself, but it’s not the first time he’s seen fear of change being impossible outweighing one’s identity.  Might be worth keeping an eye on what happens if she ever gets over those doubts; could make for an interesting rebound effect.

That said, Sullivan’s just about to finish mentally filing it all away as “boring IT tech to shove paperwork off onto” and move onto the next profile when he notices she finally sent in her equipment request last night.  About damn time.  Looking at the list, he wonders aloud what his friend told her she’d be doing.  Multiple high-end server racks.  Drones.  Projectors.  3D printers compatible with esoteric materials.  Blast-proof safety glass.  Laser cutters.  And “one small potted tree; bonsai or similar”.  Either she’s messing with him or those notes for followup need higher priority after all.  Approved in full either way.

That leaves the wizard.  Ashan Glassheart.  Unlike the last two, there hadn’t been any public records apart from the obituary of a nine-year-old boy over a decade ago.  Fortunately, Sullivan had been keeping tabs on this kid for years now.  Anchor world born mages with offworld training are the kind of rarity worth keeping an eye on when they crop up, whether you’re looking to capitalize on them or stay out of their way.  As much as it irks him to admit, there’s some truth to the oft-repeated story structure of “normal kid goes to a magical otherworld and becomes a big damn hero”.  Sure, no one likes to talk about when it goes wrong, but on the times it goes right you can wind up with some truly bullshit feats of bending reality.

Like Carnette.

No, no one’s like Carnette.

Sullivan shakes his head, as if that actually does anything to clear the passing thought and turns his attention back to the file in front of him.  Back to this Glassheart kid.

And he is a kid compared to everyone else that’s going to be on this team.  Barely out of his teens, assuming an approximate temporal sync between worlds.  Probably the most experienced of the three though, despite that.  It hadn’t been easy connecting the off-world mage who picked up the mantle of wandering do-gooder that Sullivan’s friend left floating on the wind to a supposedly dead child, but once he came across a report of an individual matching Glassheart’s description setting up wards around the private residence of some normie family the pieces started to fall into place.  After that it was just a matter of collecting old news reports from the area - mundane and Backstage - exhuming an empty grave in the dead of night, and calling in a favor with an offworld contact to put together a picture of who this kid was.  Exhuming the grave was probably unnecessary in hindsight, but Sullivan had reached peak boredom at the time, and that was half the reason for investigating in the first place if he was being honest with himself.

The story, Sullivan imagines, goes something like this:

Once upon a time, in a sleepy little small down in the ass-end of nowhere lived a little boy.  This little boy, ever since he could remember, had lived a magical childhood, with all manner of sprites and fairies and monsters roaming the woods outside his home.  This is actually quite normal for small children in sleepy little towns in the ass-end of nowhere, although most dismiss it as playing pretend once they get older, except on nights when they are fantastically drunk and/or tripping balls.  Or they get gobbled up.  That’s been known to happen too.  

What set this little boy apart was one day an honest to goodness wizard by the name of Aliana Glassgaze appeared before him and told him he had a magical destiny if only he would leave his family behind and come with her to another world called Orthon.  The little boy, like any healthy young boy presented with the opportunity to go on a grand adventure and gain wizardly powers, accepted this offer.  But he was a good boy who didn’t want his parents to worry themselves looking for him, so he did the reasonable thing and faked his death - a wonderfully thrilling experience, as Sullivan can attest from multiple occasions.

On Orthon, the little boy traveled all over with Glassgaze learning magic and going on all sorts of fun adventures.  But probably not too fun because he mostly liked lame pacifist spells for making walls and bubbles and instead of cool spells like fireball and bone rearranger.  Eventually the little boy became a moody teenager and then a definitely emotionally stable young adult, completed his training, took on the wizard name Ashan Glassheart - as is traditional on Orthon to show the bond between student and teacher - then at last parted ways with his mentor and came home over a decade later to play super hero with his new wizard powers.  But because secret identities are lame and real heroes are living icons twenty-four seven with no personal life, he skipped the most fun part of faking your death and didn’t show up to surprise and distress all the people who attended his funeral.

Oh, and for some reason he runs around in cosplay despite claiming to have never heard of this season’s new hit shojo anime, Crystal Witch Arya, starring a near-identically dressed protagonist nor met the author behind the manga it’s based on.  That’s one mystery Sullivan’s thrown into the “funny, but too stupid to bother solving” pile.

All in all - especially having seen the boy in action personally - Sullivan mentally files this one as “valuable asset, especially if his hero’s journey left him with emotional maturity instead of repressed trauma.”  Not quite valuable enough though to grant his sole equipment request of access to the Bridgewood Manor Library.  Well, maybe the lesser library.  Under supervision.

Sullivan exits out of the files and closes the laptop.  That’s enough looking at these clowns for today.  Void knows he’s going to get more than his fill of them in person soon enough.  Funny though that no one on this team uses the name they were born with.

He stands up, stretches, and walks off, leaving the laptop on the chair.  It’s not like anyone else is here to get into it, and he can always send a cleaning golem to fetch it later if he doesn’t feel like coming back for it himself.  Besides, his next spot of research to catch up on isn’t going to have a digital source.

Thankfully, his friend’s asked him to try picking up from where their leads on their “big quest” have hit a dead end, and that means he’ll be working that case solo while everyone else is doing team building exercises.  Said dead end turned out to be fairly literal, with the base of operations for a multi-word smuggling ring cleaned out of all its goods and all its members slaughtered thoroughly enough that attempts to call up their ghosts or reanimate their bodies to ask what happened have failed.  The hours not spent violating his soon-to-be-coworkers’ privacy or fixing up the parts of the manor he’d been letting slide lately he’s been making visits to old contacts - from Eyeball Jerry, the street food vendor with a side hustle as an info broker, to Edard Jariden, the Crossherd Commissioner of Public Safety whom he’d had a two month fling with back when the man was still an intern - and somehow none of them knew anything more than speculation.  None of the local players - criminal or otherwise - were taking credit, the incident didn’t fit the MO of any of the handful of outside groups with a history of meddling in Crossherd’s affairs, and if there were any survivors or associates of the smugglers they’d all disappeared.  Or been disappeared.  If Sullivan hadn’t been so starved for a proper challenge lately, he might even call it frustrating.

But for the moment, he’s simply intrigued.  No, not “simply” intrigued.  Invested enough to go downstairs and unlock the manor’s greater library again.  If he can’t find anything on the dead smugglers, perhaps he might be able to dig up something on what they were smuggling.  His friend said that it was the theft of a device capable of binding and controlling lesser deiform entities that got them on this trail in the first place, and that is the sort of thing Carnette had an interest in.  With any luck he might be able to find a match in the library and from there… well, that will depend on what he finds.

He stops in the middle of the hallway in front of a blank spot on the wall between a four-armed suit of armor and a marble statue of a long-bearded wizard.  He reaches out and knocks a rhythm on the wall.  Once upon a time the passcode would change twice a year, but the teasing inside joke Carnette left it on last still causes the wall to slide open.  On the other side is a gilded spiral staircase descending down a long stone tube.  A good meter of empty space separates the edge of the stairs from the outer wall.  Room enough for the adventurous to slide the whole way down the banister or for the exceptionally durable to jump.

Sullivan puts a foot forward but hesitates on the threshold as memories rise unbidden.  Carnette showing off the false windows to other worlds spaced along the shaft to give the impression of descending from the heavens to deep beneath the sea during his first visit.  The ornate door at the bottom.  Being pushed over the edge of the banister.

He forces the memories back down and takes another step only to be interrupted once again, this time by tugging at his pant leg.  He looks down to see a fist-sized black orb suspended on eight spindly legs.  Or rather, suspended on seven and getting his attention with the eighth.  Seeing that it has its master’s attention, the maintenance golem begins making a series of chittering noises.  Sullivan sighs and rolls his eyes in response.

“You know I can’t understand you,” he says, “so just get on with it.”

The golem squeaks and begins scurrying down the hallway.  Sullivan closes the hidden door with another - less elaborate - knock and then follows after the tiny servitor.  Either his friend is back or there’s something broken in an area that needs explicit permission from the master of the house to enter.  Either way, it’s something best not kept waiting.

And it’s an excuse to keep putting off going back down there for at least a little while longer.

<-Previous Chapter Masterpost Next Chapter->

[affordableevaluations]

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[nyxqueenofshadows]

it took me 128 hours, but i finally finished yakuza 7! as always, play diary under the cut (5k words, fyi)

had a lot of fun, there were times i laughed out loud and cried and yeah, adore the ichigang and what they bring to the series. banger of a game

bless ichiban and his big dumb heart

masato is such a dick. reminds me of post-timeskip nishiki a bit. i like how they portray his illness tho (even if they’re super vague about it).

oh speaking of there’s sooooo much cutscene jesus christ. even for a yakuza game this is killing me, even if it’s all very good. feels like i’m watching a tv show at times.

new year’s tacky sunglasses i salute you

the bread cutscene! it really does look great, idk what possessed them to spend as much time as they must’ve done to make one bite of bread look that good but i respect it!

ponytail ichi!! he’s only in it for like 5 minutes but i already miss him

anyway hey adachi welcome to the party now what on earth do you want and why are you pestering him about it this much

this is probably gonna come up again but i feel like i have no sense of how long anything’s gonna take. i’ll be stuck in 45 minute long segments where i can’t save or do much of anything and i can never see them coming even tho i’m what, nine games in at this point?

it’s so weird walking at the bottom of nakamichi street and the don quijote isn’t there. that’s like THE landmark down there for so many games (and in real life!) and for it to be a police station feels weirdly wrong.

arakawa sr what’re you doing man? what’s with the cold shoulder? and why are you buddy buddy with omi now?

ichi and adachi really get off on the wrong foot huh, tho it’s nice to see them getting over that a bit as they work together.

looking at nick ogata it’s kind of easy to see where they were hoping to slot akiyama in. shame, too.

after the first dungeon (and boss) to test me i think i’m getting used to the combat now? obvs i’ve not got a lot to work with yet tho.

so i played the rggo version of ichi’s story like six months ago? so i knew that arakawa sr shooting ichi was a thing, but oh man. he really has no hesitation there does he. fuck. also adachi! i need him back and he’s gone :(((( at least it gave me my equipment i put on him back

nanba! grumpy guy. reasonable tho.

fake money? huh. wonder who put that on ichi. and why, too. is this gonna be to do with that commissioner guy, the one from the cabaret club.

i needed to quit so i skimmed over this a bit (which is a shame cos it was a good bit) but nanba has a criminal record??? tell me more??? (me from later: ohhh he was selling drugs on the black market. nanba... me from even later: BRO WHY)

i’ve unlocked substories! woohoo!

hamako’s great, like her a lot. yeah, show ‘em who’s boss!

wait ryo aoki is leader of bleach japan? that explains a few things. (i had it spoiled for me shhh) also bleach japan guy (kume?) can go die, i hate him. do i get to hit him at some point, please say i do (me, post game: I do, but not nearly enough.)

the bit where nanba and ichi finally get a place to live and sit talking about their dreams and being like fuck it, do what you want hit me harder than i expected. maybe it’s just where i’m at in life (or that i’m a big ol’ sap) but i teared up a bit

adachi’s back in the party, ichi’s got his hero bat, everything’s going great! can’t wait for it all to come crashing down around them when whatever the fuck was going on with the geomijul guy with the crossbow comes back at the party again.

wait wait hold on why did they translate sujimon sensei like that??? he introduces himself as ドクターすじもん and then says people call him すじもん博士（はかせ）so why not stick with that? doctor sujimon and then professor sujimon, it even links back to the pokemon stuff more (professor oak etc.) did they just want the alliteration???

anyway i lost my first fight :((( i went wandering in chinatown and they’re like twice my level up there. bummer. I’m actually gonna have to start saving my money like a real adult :(((

the noise i made when nanoha’s last name was revealed i was like OH? Saeko’s coming, right? We’re nearly there? also as someone connected to care homes if they’re using this as one big scam i’m gonna be so pissed off

IT WAS WORSE tho ngl this doesn’t seem like a sustainable business model?

finally met kashiwagiiiiiiii i love how they completely blow past him being someone you might recognise if you’ve played 0-3, he’s just like yo are you gonna pay this time. also not sure how i feel about gary buster holmes (now actually pronounced gary and not gayry) being in it. they’ve upped his japanese so it sounds even more unintelligible and foreign than his last appearance, and is it not just kind of fan service? like, i like him don’t get me wrong, but did he need to be there

yokohama is  so big :’(

the boss fight/rush/dungeon thing through seiryu hq was actually pretty fun and not too difficult, which was nice. hoshino (no, not the one from judgment but what a twist that would be) has a weirdly incongruent voice but i’m sure i’ll get used to it. also he knows smth, i’m suspicous of this man.....

ALSO what was ichi thinking about when they came out of HQ? he was clearly distracted, but about what?

they really straight up killed nonomiya huh. no amount of ‘he was secretly nice really’ is gonna make me like him tho, he was an arse asdfghjkl

SAEKO she’s here!!!! the scene where she joins the party was really sweet (even if they go from 0 to 100 really quickly asdfghjkl like they met ten minutes ago and then she spilled her entire backstory and now they’re on ‘we’ll never leave you alone again’ terms. okay?)

pun names in substories continue, ofc bubble man is called awano, of course he is

i am not gonna handle this job system well, i can see it coming (edit: actually, I did pretty well. Could’ve been more efficient about it, but overall not bad)

it’s weird seeing things that were in judgment in this game but in completely different places. like, there’s the single chase sequence at the start of the game (were they planning more? it feels like it), the search sequence where you look for nancy, and then saeko’s cheers are very similar to mafuyu’s in that one sequence. i know it’s just classic rgg asset reuse but smth about it feels different here?? (edit: I don’t know what I meant here)

ERI! oh wait i’ve gotta do the business minigame to get her in the party :((( okay plot hold on, i’ve got some grinding to do

so THAT’S how the counterfeit money fits in! assuming the bill ichiban had in his pocket is linked in to this liumang operation.

i’m really liking the longer time to get to know each character and for their relationships to develop. rgg have always been good at that but it feels like they’re really getting chance to shine here

that said i really do hate how there’s no grace period after combat and you can get stuck in a loop of enemy spawns and fights. for grinding xp it’s great but for actual fun? not so much.

is nugget two (aka omelette) just there for fan service? don’t get me wrong i’m very happy to have a chicken wandering the office again, but it’s all i can think about whenever i see her

did the management game up to unlocking eri basically all in one session. don’t recommend, exactly, but it was convenient! i also like that there’s skills linked to doing that, it’s an extra incentive to do it

after several hours of pootling around doing some minor grinding and the part time hero stuff, time to finally finish chapter 5! also why is there nowhere i can buy enforcer gear, i can get stuff for basically every other job except that one, and two of the gear shops on the map aren’t open yet...

mabuchi can GET FUCKED but anyway hi joongi

that dungeon after that, from after joongi leaves to the final boss fight with *checks notes* heavy machinery is so looooong, are they all gonna be like this? it’s just weird cos there’s two save points quite close together and then nothing for like half an hour and three floors. odd design

whoever said zhao is like a gen z majima is so not wrong (tho toned down ofc). wonder what he’s like not in front of a crowd (very good, is the answer)

geomijul let’s goooooo this was a much more enjoyable dungeon than the yokohama one, even with the random where’s wally thing it had going on in the middle.

oh so THEY’RE the ones making counterfeit money! oh! also hi again joongi. so glad i had eri for your boss fight or it might have been a little trickier (even if i had her as idol so i had two idols in the party... oops)

ALSO NANBA WTF i knew he had a sibling (it got spoiled for me :((( tag your spoilers people!!!) but didn’t know circumstances. yikes. so then if the geomijul didn’t take his brother (which seems unlikely) then who did?

it’s not even 2am yet??? guys do you not need sleep????

oh this is a loooong night.

obligatory plot/history dump section, currently feeling a lot like how hiroshima worked in y6 but with somehow more corruption. less murder tho, probably. so by the ijin three working together on their counterfeit venture and sending the money to the governor who gives it to the police this somehow keeps the balance. a balance so fragile that one man dying can upend the whole thing. guys i don’t think this plan was as solid as you thought it was.

i can’t believe i’m about to say this, but as he currently is i don’t like zhao. well no, i *do*, but i also want to punch him a bit which is good, i think that’s how it’s supposed to go.

NANBA COME ON MAN these people are clearly using you as a means to an end

also i’m not happy with how in the translation they keep saying he pretended to be homeless. this isn’t true, both in general and in the jp text. he *was* homeless. it wasn’t an act, it wasn’t a play, it was a thing he did to get what he wanted. he didn’t have a secret second place to live or a job he was doing to keep himself afloat, he was just like the other people in that camp but for the fact that he chose that specific spot and probably did at one point or another have the means to support himself. anyway, rant over

i mean it eri is so fucking op omg she’s never leaving the party

side content is going well, tho i’m getting to the point where i need money to do some of them and i Do Not Have Enough. where am i supposed to get two million yen from, game, why do this to me

i feel like they put ono michio in just cos he’s popular not cos it makes any real sense. like it’s fine, ig, but idk. maybe i’m all ono michio’d out.

i lost my first plot fight.... :((( it’s the one against nanba and ishinoda, i think i got kind of unlucky with attacks cos i didn’t have nearly the same problems the second time round even tho i was equally as prepared.

they literally could have told nanba his brother was alive and well, that would have fixed all of their problems and he wouldn’t have gone ratting out their counterfeiting scheme. guys why didn’t you??? i know they explained it sort of (and they said they underestimated how bad things were) but i still don’t see how denying him what he wanted to know helped anyone in that situation.

obligatory long lore dump via vague torture scene (this is literally the bit with hamura in judgement). i’m gonna be honest i zoned out a bit partway through but i got the gist.

nanba’s not staying :((( i get it tho.

Anyway once again hi joongi welcome aboard! get ready to get put through your fucking paces

wait so the omi were at the liumang restaurant (qijin?) to make an oath with mabuchi, or smth, and then they see him get beaten into the floor and just leave? lol what was the point

NANBA FUCKING CAME THROUGH okay i’ve been won over, sorry i was ever mean to you nanba. i don’t think anyone could refuse ichiban a second time when he looks at you with those big ‘i unconditionally love you’ eyes

mitsu returns too! interesting place to bring him back too, hopefully he comes back again later (…barely. Bummer.)

is zhao a closet tsundere

oh they killed ogasawara? yikes. nanba says it best, aoki’s plan is working really efficiently and really well, i’m almost impressed

i have everyone in the party now! woo hoo! tho it does stand out more than a little bit that everyone has a karaoke song except joongi. i know they fix that for infinite wealth (and it kinda makes sense, ig) but come on let me hear him :((((((

i did not find the yokohama dungeon fun. as a way of levelling up it’s fairly efficient but my god do i not wanna do the whole thing again

(i’m still pootling around in chapter 11 don’t @ me) LAU KA LONG IS THAT YOU i thought he didn’t turn up until gaiden, i got jumpscared by him and his tsukumo hair *some time later* his name’s CHAU ka long??? fucking bite me

finally moving onto chapter 11 can’t wait to do some more plot oh no i’m in chapter 12 and it wants 3 million yen from me. *sigh* back to the grind

masato really had a shitty night in 2001 huh. i mean he’s hardly the nicest guy, even back then, but still. will say tho that the dead guy, suzumori, was literally asking for it. if he’s dumb enough to say shoot me to a guy with a gun then idk what he was expecting.

he and ichiban have the same eyes, i think. aoki’s are smaller than ichiban’s big puppy eyes so it’s harder to tell but i’m pretty sure they’re the same. There’s no reason for this, but it’s there.

having done everyone’s drink links, i think the ending of zhao’s is my favourite (recency bias maybe) but the best overall was adachi’s? difficult to say.

also ‘pan joongi’ has me fucking DEAD some of these party chats are hilarious. i’m gonna find them all if it kills me istg

ichiban holdings nee senbei is DONE so ofc i immediately went to spend all of my money (minus the 3 million yen i needed) on gear. oops. also yeah eri, punch that dude in the face!!!

the cutscene where aoki is bitching to sawashiro about how no one told him daddy dearest was going to sotenbori was weirdly rushed? like not pacing but literally the dialogue would move onto the next bit before he’d finished speaking the lines. is that a glitch or smth? was very off-putting (me from later: most of the cutscenes in that office were like that? And only aoki’s dialogue? Ig my game glitched)

we’re in sotenbori!!!!! it feels so small compared to ijincho but it’s kinda nice. cosy. tho why tf are we starting in the grand, we don’t have the money for this and we’re not even being served by a hostess, why are we here asdfghjkl

doing the entire sotenbori battle arena was both a lot more engaging for me compared to the yokohama dungeon AND much more worth it. good gear, good money, and for levelling people quickly it’s absolutely perfect (at current levels)

man am i glad i did tho that saejima majima fight would’ve been rough if i went there immediately when i arrived in sotenbori. didn’t do too bad tho, lost eri (saejima one-shotted her from full health...) but everyone else stayed up pretty easily.  i find it interesting that after the fight tho majima says やっぱり when he’s talking about them being allies. did he twig it halfway through the fight or did he know already? and how? (the eclectic arrangement of people with ichi was probably a clue but still asdfghjkl) ALSO you’re telling me they were in osaka for two entire years and no one fucking noticed. they were IN OMI HQ to meet with arakawa and no one fucking noticed. (also arakawa says that the only people who know 3jima are there are the people in that room but that’s not true, mitsu also knows. rgg why do you always forget poor mitsu....)

poor mitsu being bullied tho :((( he’s trying his best and ichi is just like nah, i’m coming in whether you like it or not

is it me or is daigo(‘s actor) putting in a better performance in this game than previous ones. idk maybe it’s just cos i’ve not seen him in like three games

i was kind of expecting the fight in omi hq to be longer. huh. ALSO tendo is like i’m jumping sides we’re friends now, and then he vanishes from literally all cutscenes after that moment. i’m not even confident he’s outside of the party combat where the other guys were. so what happened to tendo????? are we gonna see him again or is that it? (foreshadowing is a literary device-)

figures that kiryu comes back and his first line is おらぁ！ asdfghjkl and watase being like who is he? no idea??? fucking got me, bless that man. daigo’s expression in that scene was really good too, seems like he’s the only person that believed kiryu was gone. saejima and majima sure as hell didn’t.

scene with ichiban and arakawa sr on the yokohama dock was excellent. well-written, well-performed just, great cutscene. honestly that entire chunk of cutscene (slightly minus the bit where ichiban runs to arakawa sr’s body) up to and including the scene with sawashiro, ishioda and the execs. really really good

WELL that was a lot of feelings, time to go and do some side shit, ig.

the feelings aren’t over!!!!! No!!!!

sure, let’s go run in the election. why not. it does kind of hurt me personally that ichi and co. are just using this election as a sham to get close to kume and therefore aoki, and while you’re walking around people will be like ‘I’ll vote for you!’ ‘you’re better than that guy!’ and we’re really, really not (in this one single instance. every other time kume can go get fucked and hopefully unlearn all the shit aoki and bleach Japan got him to believe)

hoshino no, you didn’t deserve this : ( sawashiro….

sawashiro’s backstory is all very interesting for pretty much everyone involved (except the women cos this is an rgg game). masato is sawashiro’s son, shit, dude. Ichi does not seem to be taking this super well but honestly, fair! he’s a rough couple of days and now he’s just found out the guy he looked up to this whole time and devoted his entire life to was actually his dad, and probably knew and didn’t tell him. that’s fucked up.

MICHINO SHIRABE ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME the pun names in this game istg, this is some ace attorney level shit

fuck the fight with kiryu. it’s just, so not engaging as a fight. partly cos i was a little underleveled I think but also you just end up using like two attacks on him the whole fight chipping away at his enormous well-defended health bar and I got bored. also if I have to hear him say 次は何だ one more time I’m gonna fucking riot. at least his boss theme is the best version of his theme we’ve ever had and one of the best themes in the whole game

I have complicated feelings on kiryu being in this plot at all, tbh. with the context of gaiden ig it’s more forgiveable but it just feels like he doesn’t belong there, y’know? this is ichiban’s story but all of kiryu’s mess and baggage have dragged their way in and it shifts the focus for too long. idk. I was in a bad mood anyway when I played this section so I might be being less charitable than I normally would be. I like kiryu, I like his story, but rn he’s not who I should be engaging with.

okay I’m having fun again now, the other day was an outlier. In retrospect I do like how they integrated his styles and signature moves into his moveset. and the dragon, while utterly nonsensical even in context, looked pretty cool.

anyway I ran the sotenbori battle arena one more time so now it’s time to go and punch ishioda in the face!

had some difficulties with that battle (saeko got stunned early and I had to reevaluate my whole plan) but joongi came through and overall it definitely went easier than the kiryu fight even if the mirror face thing was fucking dumb. I don’t hate it? I don’t think? but wtf was that asdfghjkl

ohhhh, that’s what happened to tendo. ohhhhhh well shit ALSO did ishioda just fucking die. did they leave him to explode on the bomb. guys, guys that’s a crime, guys-

actually really like the cutscene of aoki and his secretary (she has a name, I can’t remember it *cry*), it reinforces a lot about his character and the effect he has on people.

fascinated by the lack of security at this event where the governor of Tokyo is talking. if ichiban had been someone with ill intent aoki would’ve been totally fucked. also nick is back in the main plot, good for him

right, time to go and piss around with the side content some more rather than deal with the implication that date and Adachi are friends

MAKO-CHAN no, not having it. I saw on one of their official streams once, when they were doing the stream every day for like two weeks thing they were doing, Yokoyama say he regretted this and that it was fan service (it was the stream with ushizawa, the jp streamer). I think that’s probably fair, especially cos you don’t get to use new serena as a hideout afterwards. the scene doesn’t really add anything and date didn’t need to be there. having said that, I’m happy seeing him again and it’s kind of funny how short he is compared to everyone else. (as an aside ushizawa had some *balls* to turn to Yokoyama and be like this bit was shit asdfghjkl)

why does the kamurocho batting centre look weird. did they shorten the distance or smth? I swear it didn’t look like this in judgment. and the textures are so low res….

WELL. I’M DONE. FUCK

I liked going up through millennium tower. the floors felt a little samey after a while but it was kind of nostalgic walking through the same place you fight as kiryu in 6.

ig tendo also having the dragonfish tattoo is where they got in that detail from rggo, tho where it was sawashiro there and his was white(?) this time it’s tendo and it’s blue (and uh, not a dragonfish? But you know what I mean). I like how they mixed it in with his moveset and the names of his moves tho, that’s neat.

the tendo boss fight runs a little overlong imho but if you’re levelled it’s so much easier than any of the old guard boss fights. same for both of the aoki boss fights. like yeah, you might get swarmed a bit in that first one, but I never felt like I was in any danger. the QTEs caught me off guard tho, I wasn’t expecting any and then suddenly they throw four at me at once, come on guys asdfghjkl

everything after that HOO BOY I was kind of indifferent on masato as a character up to this point (he had his moments but I was just like blah whatever) but I’ve officially been converted. the writing in that cutscene where ichi yells at him and tries to beg him to start over and onwards from there is so so so fucking good, there’s so much character there and it’s expressed so well. I teared up at points cos ichi is so desperate not to lose anyone else, and despite everything – despite him ordering the death of his DAD – he’s willing to be by him and hold him up for as a long as it takes. it’s such a fucking ichiban moment and it’s played so well, in general and in the performance.

same for the scene at the lockers. I think that, along with the kiryu bit on the roof in 5 (either one, take your pick), is one of my new favourite scenes in the series. it’s heartbreaking.

AND THEN FUCKING KUME okay no I can be calm about it. part of me is like, this is a cop out, this is rgg studios once again having a character die instead of going through the long process of redemption and growth. but part of me is also like no, this is the perfect place to use it. aoki ryo was everything kume aspired to be, everything masato groomed him to be, and he’s absolutely the kind of person who would be sent over the edge by the reveal that aoki wasn’t real. or, well, that he had committed an unforgiveable sin. kume believes more than anything that he is doing the right thing, even when committing murder, because he believes that if he is ‘cleansing’ then therefore he *must* be in the right, no matter the action being done. he turned out exactly like aoki wanted him to, but masato wasn’t prepared for the consequences of that (I think he knew, tho), and that cost him.

I don’t LIKE kume as a character, he’s annoying, but I do think his arc is quite well done and that it’s reminiscent of the real kumes out there.

the last little bit made me cry too, where ichi is on the bridge. it’s the ‘everything sucks but there’s hope there if only you look’, it gets me every fucking time. it’s such a thesis for ichiban as a character, the game as a whole, and even the whole series.

also Adachi gets his moment! good for him! can’t wait for kamurocho to get its next new corrupt police chief asdfghjkl

also genuinely, did they leave ishioda to explode on that bomb. guys, guys that’s a crime, guys-

uh things I wanted uh, mitsu deserved some more dialogue, and I wish joongi and zhao got a bit more plot time after their respective bits. it makes sense to focus on the core four (ichi, saeko, Adachi, nanba) cos you’ve spent more time with them but it does make them feel like set dressing sometimes. eri isn’t even there (I get why but still :sad: ). also nick, the entire time he was there I couldn’t help but think of Akiyama the whole time. thematically he makes so much more sense, and it would give that scene where he calls aoki out so much more impactful. OH and mirror face can fuck off, worst plot twist to appear twice, why the fuck is he there asdfghjkl

OH ALSO the first aoki fight, it’s really jarring when that just has the generic fight theme. like, obviously he gets his own very good theme later, but they couldn’t have come up with one to slot in here? it feels so wrong

saeko DOES kiss ichiban. huh. I thought that was smth they just introduced for infinite wealth but there was actually precedent. kashiwagi being involved is killing me asdfghjkl love that man (oh he does the same for eri, interesting.)

the romance subplots do, on the whole, make me very uncomfortable. Especially iroha’s, she comes on incredibly strong and it’s not super clear he reciprocates on that, plus she’s super possessive and weird and then drops him once she’s got what she wanted. Not good. (one of the ladies does imply he’s more submissive than she expected, so at least there’s that nugget, but I’d rather not have got it like this, thanks). And the ending? What are we going for here, guys? Cos I’m not sure it works!

Dragon kart on the other hand, great fun. A little light on the subplot nonsense (compared to, say, the taxi minigame from 5) and the mini advertisement half-way through for pocket circuit could’ve been skipped, but they’re minor problems. The racers are all living out their shounen sports manga dreams, good for them. The courses are fun too!

Wait no, the party chat about mushrooms has romantic (sub)text and they cut it in the localisation! How dare they deny my Adachi/nanba dreams

What a note to end on asdfghjkl