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serpentface · 7 months ago
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I'd say the 'aware of loss of faculties until they aren't' description is apt, but with less of the horror that most humans experience with this knowledge. Units have a sense of personhood, but archin do not tend to philosophically imagine a 'self'. Their consciousness being an emergent property of many interacting bodies kind of precludes the illusion of some core, unchanging individual essence.
The basic experience of being divided is something every unit would have been through, an entire unit is not in literal constant communication and will temporarily divide itself even down to the individual to perform simple tasks (though always with the comfort of scent trails leading back to the collective).
It would still be unsettling and a source of deep melancholy. The pain would be more knowing that there is no going back, the scent trails lead nowhere, there are no more eggs being laid that will replace the parts of you that die or are separated. You would increasingly struggle with abstract concepts and complex ideas, the edges of your personality would slowly be smoothed out, you are increasingly running on raw instinct. You remember everything, but without any way to organize these memories into anything more than flashes. Most of the pain would be a profound sense of loneliness.
How a merger would feel would depend on how much of the unit remains. If its personality is more or less intact, it will probably survive as the same 'person' (mergers are usually accomplished with recently pupated ants, or by taking a few individuals from many units so as not to disrupt other consciences). If it's down to just a few ants, any remnant of the original personality will be lost upon the merger and they will settle into the new personality (perhaps subtly changing it, as all units do over time, but not in a distinct, easily identifiable way). The only thing that remains of the former unit is their raw memory. Even individual archin have very good memories and their learned experiences will supplement the new consciousness with everything it has experienced. So the new merger might learn and 'remember' the pain of loss, though not in a complex way (complex memories, like being able to tell a story, are stored in the collective and not the individual).
Mergers between roughly equal numbers of ants are rare and only done in desperation due to being incredibly disruptive to the personality of each, and a very literal danger that individual archin will become panicked and attack the 'foreign' bodies. A large ratio is ideal so one side has enough of an intact group consciousness to tamp down these impulses, and ability to physically restrain the other side until they have calmed and accommodated to the new scent. All mergers have risks of aggression, but introducing similar numbers is especially risky and sometimes fails entirely due to too many being killed in the process.
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cbk1000 · 5 months ago
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One thing I hate about taking iron supplements is having to plan what I eat/drink around it, because certain food and drinks will block iron absorption. Mr. Jenn makes me some scrambled eggs for breakfast? No cheese because it's too close to my next supplement, and dairy blocks iron absorption. No morning tea that I love to start off with because the tannins in it will block iron absorption. I want that shit injected directly into my veins and to be free.
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oneiricazalea · 4 months ago
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I am 28 as of today! Unfortunately, my brain has not been good to me, so just imagine that I’m sharing a silly art of me, Mika and Cloud celebrating our birthdays today.
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msburgundy · 7 months ago
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i am relatively certain i am no longer poisoned, but now i'm not sure if i am still medicated lol
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smile-files · 10 days ago
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we have to paint with novel materials for art class... so i may or may not be doing a bit of alchemy with my meds...
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fatelcved · 2 months ago
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my lads-wired brain is just " oh what if you make kaiya a verse <3 not as an mc but as a lemurian <3 she's water-coded don'tcha know <3 " and you know what?? i think i will do that
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kyrakyrakitty · 1 year ago
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this is the funniest way to advertise your scam
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active-mind-15 · 1 year ago
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I have a headcanon that if Seirin goes for a training camp and Riko ends up having to cook for the players, Hyuuga secretly packs immodium tablets and painkillers in his bag. Just in case...
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runawaycarouselhorse · 4 months ago
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This thread from the CPTSD subreddit about the overabdunance of cheap junk food, but little healthy food (and the weird poverty mindset leading to parents guarding food until it spoils and screaming at anyone who eats [too much] of it or acting like they were planning to eat it, but if you don't eat from it, it gets thrown out) is so illuminating.
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sac-bestsupplements · 9 months ago
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Creatine Benefits: What is it good for? The Shocking Effects of Monohydrate Powder & Pills Revealed
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#creatine #creatinebenefits #creatinemonohydrate
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lucalicatteart · 2 years ago
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Poll adventure (paventure? lol) Day 10: read the small story tidbit below the poll for more details, OR just vote based on initial impression
(✦ see past poll results + further information HERE (link) ✦)
Yesterday's poll decided that The Adventurer should join the travelers on the larger river boat for a short lunch ...
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"Before he even fully musters the courage to shout a 'hello', the large group on the boat initiates contact first, gleefully waving at him, whooping and shouting as they near his tiny raft in the water. Apparently, some of them were betting over whether they'd actually find any other travelers out on the river today.. He fumbles over his words a bit, as always, but somehow manages to successfully get himself invited onto their boat for a quick lunch..
After safely securing his raft to the side of the boat with some spare rope, he climbs aboard, stumbling into the excitement of some sort of celebration. A few of them explain that they're traveling for 'kahesallei', an old elven holiday recently re-popularized in some of the larger cities nearby. Whatever it's true meaning and origins used to be, the current significance (at least to those within the city walls) seems to just be mindless feasting, drinking, and gaudy decor. Most of the traveling group are strangers to each other, only brought together by catching a ride on the same tour/party boat, but the mood is light, quite friendly between them, and perhaps a bit drunk.
While the boat itself is relatively plain wood, it's been strewn with gold and orange banners, flags, shimmery tassels, beads, and bushels of dark green ivy braided with fresh herbs and wildflowers. There are flat round tables of food and drink, plenty of cushions to lounge on, and one random guy perched precariously on the edge railing of the boat, gently strumming a lute for background music..
The elderly ship captain hobbles over to The Adventurer, sternly explaining that, no matter what the 'silly' passengers say, he's only allowed to stay for an hour because he didn't pay for a boat ride ticket, and thus really shouldn't even be allowed on board. By the time The Adventurer has mentally processed this information, the captain has already returned to his little steering room, slamming the door shut with a displeased grunt.. It probably wouldn't be a good idea to confront him or question the rules...... But! Hey, at least he has one hour at the party.. How should he spend his time? "
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Additional Information
the adventurer's current main goal: follow his map to reach the abandoned castle ruins and see the rare animal specialist about the mysterious egg he has
#paventure posting#polls#poll#choose your own adventure#LATE AGAIn I know.. I'm still in my weird unproductive spell. literally I've had the same 5 to do list items on my list#for 2 weeks now. I can't even do five simple things in 2 weeks lol. I did start some new supplements and change my diet since#my doctors are still trying to sort out what health issues are going on or etc. so maybe it's something with that#like accidentally on the new diet I'm not getting enough calories or not getting enough of some vitamin or something so it's made me oddly#brain foggy and just really tired and unable to focus well for the past few weeks or something..? ANYWYA. not really sure what#it is specifically but my functioning in terms of actually focusing on and completing tasks has been a lot worse . thus#chronically behind on things. which I am always chronically behind on things in some sense since I always have like 7000 projects#I'm working on at the same exact time and etc. lol. but like.. even more chronically behind than usual .. ToT#ANYWAY.. I'm suprised that the 'try to get a ride on the boat' option didn't get that many votes actually lol#Like.. treveling down a river in a tiny handmade raft is probably.. not extremely safe or efficient lol#But at least he gets to have lunch there. Just the hour that he's on the boat doing whatever will get him a lot further because the boat#is moving faster than his raft would be. It should still get him out of the river and back on track sooner. Because he still has a long way#to go to get to the abandoned castle. I know it's been a lot of days since I'm not keeping up well with actually doing these#daily or every other day - but technically in the story it's only been a little over a day since he left the Inn#The first day he just walked. the second day he saw there was a barrier in his path. then spent half the day building a boat. and now he'e#*he's where he is now. The trip is roughly 4 days and he's like.. a little over halfway through his second. Not counting any detours or#distractions he might run into. But at least at this pace he should be off the river before it starts to get dark#Thate the main thing. you want to get a good rest on solid ground. ideally. So long as nothing strange happens on the boat#but yeah! day 10.. of little elf man adventure... ALSO he is like early 20s I imagine. so he can drink hbhjbjh#I know the 'very quick simple ms paint style' is kind of chibi-ish so it makes people look young but he's not a boy#don't worry. I didnt want it to seem weird like some 10 year old kid walking into a party of drunk 30 year olds#like a toddler hanging out in a night club or whatever. It's safe and okay for him to be there. just for the record. lol#I mean maybe not SAFE safe. it's still a boat of like.. rowdy party goers who could easily fall over the edge into the water or whatever bu#but like.. safe in the sense that he's not a 6 year old being offered vodka by strangers at a party. etc.#despite his goofy nervous demeanor and chronic baby face syndrome he is indeed an actual adult somehow ghbj
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strawberry-jackalope · 9 months ago
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i love vitamin deficiencies, you learn the most random shit happens, like I didn't get enough sunlight this week so I've been clenching my teeth more bc that makes fucking sense
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Yelena hearing Natasha tell her not to spike the engine, looking at Natasha with love and regret and then doing what she has to do.
Natasha seeing Taskmaster approaching fast, looking at Yelena with love and regret and then doing what she has to do.
Natasha, letting go, falling to save Yelena.
Natasha, letting go, falling to save everyone.
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muninnhuginn · 1 year ago
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12, 22, 30!!! ❤️
Thanks for asking!
12. what’s some good advice you want to share?
Thought I'd go for something I've been trying to hold myself to personally here. I have no idea if this is particularly applicable to others to the same extent it is to me, but eh. Basically, it's incredibly easy sometimes to get fixated on your own mistakes, to try and mull over how you could have done things differently, to try and examine from all angles how it went wrong. The "what if"s essentially. And, don't get me wrong, you can often learn lessons from previous mistakes. And it can be healthy to vent or wallow occasionally. But oftentimes, it's just an excuse to wind yourself up further over what you could have done. To trip over yourself in guilt rather than looking at the present, which then just means you end up making the same mistakes -> why did I do that, I should know better -> rinse, repeat. So, if you're stuck on what-if scenarios and it's a case where you're not actually getting anything constructive out of it. (Namely, stuff like if you need to give an apology, if it's better to just leave it be, what you intend to do in a similar scenario if it arises, etc) If all it's achieving is making yourself feel worse? Stop. Just literally stop ruminating over it. And I know it's a lot easier to say that than *do* it, but the key thing is to catch yourself when you're doing the spiralling thing and just acknowledge that that's what's going on. Then try and move on. But at the same time, if you're not able to shut it off immediately, don't beat yourself up over it. Just recognising when you're in that zone is progress in of itself.
22. say 3 things about someone you love
This is more "loved" than "love" but I say it counts. So, my cat. - When it got cold in the winter and I was working from home, she would always come and sit on my lap and let me stroke her whilst I was doing stuff. Sometimes, she would get onto my lap by peeking up through the shelf intended for a printer and other times she would go straight over the desk. We had a system where when she wanted to leave, I'd spin the chair over to the bed and she'd walk from the desk over my lap to the bed to curl up and sleep. - One year, we got her a cat 'Christmas stocking'. It had a load of different things in it, but most importantly, it had these cat treats she really enjoyed. Unfortunately, we didn't realise she would be able to sus out what it was, so one day we got home and found the whole thing ripped open and scattered across the sides. After that, we made sure to hide any presents for her very carefully. - The only one of her toy type things we got her that she would actually use was the scratching post. If something had catnip in she'd get all big-eyed over it (which, no surprise, led to scratches), but anything else she'd just plain ignore. She was picky like that. I miss her.
30. what’s one thing that never fails to make you happy/happier?
I don't actually have any cheat code for this one. No guarantees so much as mitigations, but let's see. Hm. I think getting away from home for a bit is a big one. Just to change the environment up really (this applies doubly in autumn/winter when the weather and short days mean I spend most of my time inside). I'll often go find a nearby place that does hot chocolate and go sit there for a bit, listening to music if it's on in there or bringing my headphones along. If I've thought ahead I'll bring something to read as well. If the weather is nice there are some local areas to explore as well and some places that are fairly quiet. In the summer, you can head to the nearby graveyard and there's this abandoned chapel type building (unfortunately you can't get into it but you can go around it :<) and loads of crows and squirrels. I also as a general kinda happy thing rather than a cheering up kinda deal tend to like watching stuff with friends.
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bredforloyalty · 11 months ago
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4 am mania
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zosonils · 2 years ago
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man i want to make a post gushing about how much i love futaba but like. i genuinely don’t think i have the vocabulary to describe how much she means to me. i’m well equipped for excitedly pointing at a character who was accidentally written to have neurodivergent swagger if you squint a bit but to see one who is explicitly, deliberately autistic right from the get go is an entirely new and wonderful experience to me
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