#sadly i dont work with this girl regularly so soon it will all be over....

[munsonology]

Not to be a hater but quite literally if given the chance I would absolutely lay into my ex friend. Like he called me a slew of names spaced out over time each one worse then the previous, shared my trauma with people and tried to use it against me, and even told the kids I babysat for years MY FUCKING KIDS (not mine but basically they were) (and their parents) that I was a bad influence and a bad person. Like I took the name calling, but then I distanced because of the wife situation, but then I find out the rest of this shit????

Like ONE CHANCE I'd take it. Let me fucking at him. ESPECIALLY if I was in a group! Like you trying to come for me???

You??? No degree barely graduated high school can't swing a hammer or change your own oil man??? Coming for a smart strong bachelor degree woman???

You lived with your parents for years, not because of a cultural thing, but because you were "scared" to live alone! Bending to your mother's every beck and call. I should call you Norman Bates with how far up your mother's ass you are.

I could get a man or woman or ANYBODY if I wanted. I have options. remember when you had a crush on me dumbass and asked me out remember when you simped for me and took me to the movies for free what about that concert that was over 300 dollars FOR FREE cause you wanted me so bad? I could have had you and DIDNT and no one wants your 30 year old ass thats why you chose an 18 year old you fucking creep THAT is why we aren't friends and then all your dirty little secrets and skeletons about what you told others about me came out. You think your shit don't smell because you are full of it

You think you are so good and kind and everything you do is golden well its fool's gold you clown. Karma gonna get you just you wait (and thats the only reason I haven't fought u yet like...im trying to be the better person but they say one more thing in my presence...)

(And yes it is fucked they went for the 18 year old and it is even more fucked that they are now married like it was so quick like who thought that was okay not me that poor girl I hope she gets out cause he is not good he is not the love of her life hes just a man!!! Let me run him over cause YOU ARE A CHILD AND) (no I was gonna be petty af and post a throwback photo and tag everyone cause I have a picture of me, him, and his wife when she was 4 and he was 16 like 💀💀)(also again no shame to her if she needs help i am getting her out but she is devoted to him and disillusioned rn he got her brainwashed and yes we all grew up together and yes its a fucked situation and I want to go all Carrie Underwood on his ass and dig a key into the side of his car and knock out his headlights but karma is coming for him and karma could do better then me) (sorry for spilling in your inbox I am a ball of hate found out today and I mean AN HOUR AGO he actually was the one to spread a rumor about me that haunts me to this day as well as telling people about secrets I had told him that were not ok to tell and he has the fucking nerve to have come into MY HOUSE under false pretenses just to record me out of context and share it as proof im terrible oh fuck him)(please note as soon as I found out he was with the 18 year old I cut him out of my life but we work together just in different departments so I see him pretty regularly still sadly and I cant quit because I signed a contract but thankfully I dont have to see his crusty ass every day cause if I did....call me Elsa with the stone cold attitude he is receiving)

oh my god bestie 😭😭 first thank you for sharing 💖 he’s a weirdo for real. the fact he married an 18 year old is just sick, and what’s worse is you know he didn’t just meet her at 18 because they never do 😒

and that’s commendable of you to wanna look after her. it might take a while for her to see who he truly is. i think it’s important to remember she might not accept help :/ it might be healthier for you to take a step back. sometimes we need to put ourselves first for our own wellbeing. hopefully her family is aware.

it always hurts when people you think are your friend are the ones who purposely and carelessly hurt you the most. and i know you wanna fuck him up and key his car but he’s not worth going to jail over. the universe has a way of always working out, what we put out into the world we receive and trust he’ll get his for all the clownery he’s doing. it might take a while but it will. and when it does you can sip your tea with a big slurp 💀

[klainymphs]

bigsmallworld replied to your post: this girl i got to work with in the past 2 days is...

You’re so lucky to have someone so sweet with you :3 just a tiny bit jealous.

i really was lucky!! most people don’t care about new people at work, especially quiet and shy people (which is what i am) so it was great of her to look after me like that :)) 

[chatnoirismycinnamonroll]

Alternate Ending to Mayura/ Song fic

I get a lot of inspiration from songs, so I'm probably going to have a lot of fics based on songs, such as this one and my previous one, Only Human, which many of you have already read. Thank you for reading. Enjoy the fic :)

--------------------------------

Disclaimer: I don't own, and never will own, Miraculous Ladybug or any other songs my fics are based on. Inspired by I'm Still Here from Jem and the Holograms.

--------------------------

It seemed like the battle was over. Chat Noir and Ladybug were groaning on the floor, having been beaten physically by Hawkmoth. He was still red, since Ladybug wasn't able to take away his cane successfully and shatter it. The other akumas had them surrounded, but Hawkmoth kept them at bay. He wanted an audience that would laugh and point along with him when he succeeded in taking the heroes' Miraculouses. Hawkmoth smirked as he stepped towards the heroes, watching them try and fail to crawl away from him.

"You both are no match for me. You are still so young, so inexperienced. You still dont know how to keep your transformations. You're sad excuses for heroes. Not only did you fail to protect Paris..." Hawkmoth stood over Chat Noir, and Ladybug's eyes widened as he reached down towards her partner. "...you even failed to protect each other from me."

Hawkmoth grabbed his hand, ready to pull his ring off, when a small red body collided into him, shouting "Don't you dare touch him!"

"M'Lady, no, wait!"

"Get off me, you stupid girl!"

"Chat!"

"Cataclysm!"

"NO!" Hawkmoth cried out in anger as Chat turned his cane into nothing but dust. He watched as his red akuma fluttered out. He reached out to grasp it, only for a red yoyo to soar over his head and conceal it within its healing light.

He felt the red bubbles envelop him as he watched the purified butterfly fly out of the yoyo and his anger grew with every flutter of its wings. He reached behind him towards the spotted heroine and finally grasped her and pulled her off his back, holding her by her neck as she kicked in pain and defiance while he threw that blasted yoyo away from her grasp. He leaned in close to her ear, and whispered menacingly:

"You may have won the battle, but you have not won the war. I wonder if this wingless Ladybug can fly."

His voice held nothing but cold anger, and Ladybug's eyes widened as she felt the flex of his arm as he quickly drew her back and threw her over the side of the railing.

"LADYBUG!"

The sound of her body hitting the landing 50 feet below them echoed in Chat Noir's ears, and he rushed to the edge as fast as he could. His emerald eyes glimmered with tears and dulled with pain and grief as he saw her motionless body lay on the metal landing, not a sign of life coming from her closed blue eyes. He couldnt feel anything. His eyes went blank as he desperately tried to shove down the pain of losing someone he loved (again!), but the anguish practically glowed form his cat-like eyes.

Hawkmoth could see the pain, and like any moth, he was drawn to it. But he still had uses for the boy, so akumatization wouldn't be so ideal. But a boy filled with hate for his loved one, and everything she cared about, would be perfect in destroying the city she loved to protect. He would be the perfect minion.

Chat's eyes widened as he heard the sound of a string being pulled, and he turned around to see Kim, akumatized regularly back into Dark Cupid, and a black rose hitting his chest. His vision enveloped into black, and he knew no more.

----------------------------

"Dupain-Cheng! Wake up! Ugh, you better not be dead or I swear on my Miraculous I WILL sting you."

"Chloe-"

"Its Queen Bee, Cesaire. Get it right, fox."

"Everyone knows who you are, Chloe, since you were the one who gave up your identity on your first day, so it doesnt really matter what I call you, now, does it?"

"Its for the principle here that matters!"

"Girls, now is not the time! We need to do something! Marinette, dude, please wake up."

"Shes not going to wake up, Nino! She's, she's-!"

"Still alive." Marinette groaned out, her head pounding as she finally got her eyes to open.

"Marinette!" Marinette cried out softly as she got crushed between two bodies, but it didnt last because a third person pulled them off and slapped her arm none too gently.

"Ow! Chloe!"

"That, Dupain-Cheng, is for daring to have been my hero all this time without telling me or your friends and for almost dying today. I'd consider giving you the gift of hugging me for your comfort, but I dont want your bloody lip getting anything on my designer jacket." Chloe sat back down with a huff, looking away with bright red cheeks as the trio of heroes looked at her in shock.

Marinette finally chuckled and smiled when it drew Chloe's attention. "Thanks, Chloe. I'll try not to die anytime soon, and I might, might, take you up on that offer for a hug. If you're nice."

Chloe made a disgusted face that made everyone laugh. Marinette's chuckles, however, died down at her sudden realization that something, or someone, was missing.

"Um, guys? Where exactly are we? And where's Chat Noir?"

Their chuckles died down at Marinette's questions. The trio looked at each other, trying to decide who would be best to tell her. Chloe rolled her eyes, but kept her eyes averted nervously as she spoke.

"Well, Dupain-Cheng...Marinette, Foxlya and Ninopace decided it would be such a brilliant idea to shove us all into a storage closet in my daddy's hotel while your mangy alley cat and Big, Bad and Unfashionable destroyed Paris."

Marinette stared at Chloe, silent with shock. Alya waved a hand in front of her face, but she still didnt react.

"Um...Mari?"

"He...they...what? Chat would never-!"

Nino spoke up, his voice tinged with a grim determination. "Oh, we know. Dark Cupid got to him first. I guess seeing you fall 50 feet and then lay motionless must have left him emotionally vulnerable, dude."

Alya looked sadly at her best friend as she looked down at the covers, her fists clenching and unclenching with her troubled thoughts. Marinette might not have known who Chat Noir was, but it was obvious that she loved him almost, if not just as much as she loved Adrien.

"So, you guys know. Then where's...?"

"Shes eating and resting in the other room. She was panicking about you, so we sent her with our kwamis to calm her down. You want to call her in?"

"That sounds just like Tikki. Always worrying about me." Marinette smiled fondly to herself before looking up at Alya. "Bring her in, Alya. I want to make sure she's also fine with the fall."

Marinette watched Alya stride towards the door, her hand reach towards the handle, but flinching back as a little red goddess phased through the door and rushed at Marinette.

"Marinette! Oh, I'm so glad you're alright! I was so worried it was all so sudden, I wasnt sure my magic would cushion your fall in time!"

Mari's blue eyes twinkled with joy and exasperated fondness as Tikki snuggled up to her cheek, worrying all the way. "I'm fine, just a little sore, I think. It still surprises me that I can survive a fall that high in the suit."

"Yeah, but please dont make it a habit."

Marinette smiled, but she turned serious as she once more pondered their situation. The look on her face finally destroyed any doubt her friends might have had that Marinette wasnt Ladybug.

"Marinette?"

"We need to capture Hawkmoth once and for all, but we cant do it alone. We need Chat Noir back. No offence guys, but you're still fairly new to working with me. And I need someone who really gets my way of thinking. Chat is that person, and i wouldn't trade him for anyone, or ever leave him at the hands of evil. Once we get Chat, Hawkmoth is going to have a hard time without all his other akumas."

Alya, Nini, and Chloe smiled eagerly, and leaned forward. "We're in."

"Great. We'll start immediately. But first, I need to get up and trans-augh!" Marinette fell forward as a sharp pain flashed through her abdomen, but Alya caught her before she hit the ground.

(Start playing I'm Still Here from Jem and the Holograms)

"Marinette, you need to move carefully! You literally just survived a life-threatening fall." Alya scolded Marinette as she helped her stand fully. Marinette smiled thankfully up at her, and looked down at Tikki. Her heart started beating faster.

"Ready? You think we can do this?"

"Of course, Ladybugs have always won. You can do this. It's written in the stars."

Marinette called on her transformation as she walked towards the door, her steps gaining confidence as she thought, "It's not over. I've still got fight."

Part of her worried over Chat Noir, wondering if she would be able to draw him from the darkness like last time. And she promised herself that Hawkmoth would pay for taking her kitty.

She looked at her team, so brave to rise after being broken. They didnt know what was coming, but they'd face it head-on.

She opened the door, and saw nothing but flames. Paris was up in flames, and it felt like her heart was burning with it. She looked at her team, and together they took the leap, falling before catching themselves, and she felt the familiar rush that told her "I'm still here." They ran across the non burning buildings, the flames licking them when they leapt over the burning ones.

They headed towards the Eiffel Tower, and she could see the height differences between the landings, and felt the ghost pain of falling, and a fire to defeat Hawkmoth once and for all. He was standing there, with Chat Noir at his left, a small collar around his neck, like a symbol that Chat belonged to Hawkmoth.

Ladybug's eyes narrowed. She ducked under a burning arch as they snuck up onto the landing. Oh, hell no. That's her kitty. He just crossed a line, and she's taking her kitty back.

"CHAAAAAT!!!!" She cried as she launched herself at him. His lips were black again, but Ladybug was not going to spend almost an hour chasing him again. Her lips crashed against his, and she rolled with him as Carapace shielded her while Rena and Queen Bee attacked Hawkmoth and Dark Cupid.

Her kitty's eyes were like fiery waterfalls. His tears burned her as she saw his pain at thinking she was dead.

"I'm here, you stupid Chat."

"My Lady?"

"Who else? Now, let's get that Miraculous."

They rushed into the fight, Hawkmoth's face whitening at seeing her still alive.

'I'm still here.'

"This isnt possible! You're supposed to be dead! You should be gone."

"And yet, I'm not. I'm still here. And I'll always be here, as long as you continue to terrorize people, Chat Noir, Rena Rogue, Queen Bee, Carapace and I will still be here to take you down! You cant win against us, Hawkmoth, and you can never get rid of us. You tried, and you failed.

I'm still here."

----------------------------

I'm just going to leave this here. If anyone actually wants to write the ending in which they defeat Hawkmoth, that's cool. I just kept hearing that song come up in my playlist and thought, this is a great comeback song. Like, you cant defeat us, no matter how hard you try.

I'm still here.

@mindfulmagics @drarrylover007 @zoe-oneesama @marionettedupaincheng @lunian @un1cornf1ghter @dreamteaze

[urscottsdale]

do all the numbers, muahaha.

hahaha fuck u

1. Think of the last person who said I love you, do you think they meant it?if its who i think it was, then no she didnt2. Would you date an 18-year-old at the age you are now?no3. When’s the last time you were aggravated and happy at the same time?maybe right now?4. Would you ever smile at a stranger?yes i have plenty of times5. Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are?nope6. Have you heard a song that reminds you of someone today?yes7. What exactly are you wearing right now?a grey v-neck with micky mouse lounge pants 😂8. How often do you listen to music?pretty much 24/79. Do you wear jeans or sweats more?sweats10. Do you think your life will change dramatically before 2013?its been like 5 years since then, so i would say yes it has11. Are you a social or an antisocial person?antisocial12. Have you ever kissed someone whose name begins with the letter ‘A’?yes13. What about ‘R’?nope14. Can you drive a stick shift?nope15. Do you care if people talk badly about you?eh depends on who but usually not16. Are you going out of town soon?i wish17. When was the last time you cried?its been awhile18. Have you ever told someone you loved them?plenty of times19. If you could change your eye color, would you?yes to brown20. Is there a boy who you would do absolutely everything for?yes my dog21. Name something you dislike about the day you’re having.missing her22. Is it cute when guys kiss you on your forehead?no 😂23. Are you dating the last person you talked to?nope24. What are you sitting on right now?on my couch25. Does anyone regularly (other than family) tell you they love you?nope26. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have?all the time27. Who was the last person you talked to before you went to bed last night?@thishailee 😊28. Do you get a lot of colds?nope29. Where is the shirt you are wearing from?walmart30. Does anyone hate you?theres a few31. Do you have any empty alcohol bottles hidden somewhere in your room?no32. Do you like watching scary movies?love scary movies33. Do you want your tongue pierced?no34. If you had to delete one year of your life completely, which would it be?probably the year before last or my freshman year of high school35. Did you have a dream last night?yes but cant remember36. When was the last time you told someone you loved them?cant remember tbh, other than my dog37. Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years?probably not38. Do you think someone has feelings for you?doubt it39. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?nope40. Did you have a good day yesterday?not really41. Think back 2 months ago; were you in a relationship?nope42. In the next 48 hours, will you hang out with a girl?probably not43. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you?yup lol but they r nowhere to be found now bc they left44. What’s the best part about school?going home45. Do you have any pictures on your Facebook?yes46. Do you ever pass notes to your friends in school?i did47. Do you replay things that have happened in your head?everyday48. Were you single over the last summer?yup but i had a couple flings49. Is your life anything like it was two years ago?nope thankfully50. What are you supposed to be doing right now?i need to be cleaning51. Do you hate the last guy you had a conversation with?no52. Are you nice to everyone?i try to be53. Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to?yes54. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat?i have55. Are you good at hiding your feelings?yes56. Do you think you like someone?eh its complicated 57. Have you kissed someone whose name starts with a ‘J’?nope58. Do you prefer to be friends with girls or boys?either is fine just no drama59. Has anyone of your friends ever seen you cry?yes60. Do you hate anyone?sadly i do61. How’s your heart?eh62. Is there something that happened in your past that you hate talking about?theres a few things63. Have you ever cried over a guy?no64. Who is probably talking a load of crap about you right now?lol someone whos name starts with a c but is always texting me late at night wanting to talk 😂65. Are your toenails painted pink?no66. Will your next kiss be a mistake?i hope not67. Girls love it when boyfriends cry; correct?i wouldnt think so unless they r twisted and love seeing them sad68. Have your pants ever fallen down in public?nope but they almost have lol69. Who was the last person you were on the phone with?probably my mom lol70. How do you look right now?relaxed71. Do you have someone you can be your complete self around?yes theres a few actually 72. Can you commit to one person?yes73. Do you have someone of the opposite sex you can tell everything to?yes74. Have you ever felt replaced?all the time75. Did you wake up cranky?sometimes76. Are you a jealous person?unfortunately i am77. Are relationships ever worth it?mine havent been 78. Anyone you’re giving up on?im trying79. Currently wanting to see anyone?yes80. Name something you have to do tomorrow?sleep81. Last person you cried in front of?cant remember bc i dont usually cry in front of people82. Is there someone you will never forget?yup83. Do you think the person you have feelings for is protective of you?no they talk shit/make up shit about me to their friends 😂84. If the person you wish to be with were with you, what would you be doing right now?hopefully showing her what she means to me and knowing the feelings were reciprocated85. Are you over your past?some things yeah86. Have you ever liked one of your best friends of the opposite sex?kinda87. Is there anyone you can tell EVERYTHING to?@thishailee and @queenddl know me better than i know me 😂88. If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept?dont think that would happen since im the one who fucked up with her and two were still good friends so no need for her to apologize. but yes i could never stay mad at her for anything, she put up with so much of my bullshit and is the reason im here today.89. So, the last person you kissed just happens to arrive at your door at 3AM; do you let them in?yes90. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated?ive dated people my friends hated91. Will you be in a relationship in 2 months?probably not92. Is there anyone you know with the name Michael?yup93. Have you ever kissed a Matthew?nope94. Were you in a relationship in January? How was it going?last janurary? yes - were friends now but not talk everyday close. this janurary? no im single.95. Were you happy with the person you liked in March?at the time i thought i was but no i wasnt96. Don’t tell me lies, is the last person you texted attractive?yes97. Who do you have texts from?a few people98. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say?they just said this and i didnt say anything lol. i already know its not gonna work out 😂99. Have you ever kissed someone older than you?no100. Who’s in your profile picture with you?no one101. Ever kissed under fireworks?nope102. Has anybody ever given you butterflies?yes and she knows

[korokoralle]

Bored? Bold what applies to you..

FROM @snidgetcharm 

Bored? [[no, procrastinating actually]] Bold what applies to you.. [[with unnecessary comments from me]]

You are in high school. You dropped out of high school. You live within 20 minutes of your best friend. You don’t have a best friend. [[Because I hate this fucking term. I have friends, good friends.]] You live within 20 minutes of the last person you kissed. [[Because he lives with me, there’s nothing interesting about this]] You live within 20 minutes of your ex. [[Gosh, I have no exes.]] You have hugged someone in the last 48 hours. You have been to the movies within the last week. You have had 3 or more boyfriends/girlfriends just this year. You have been a designated driver. You have broken merchandise and not paid for it. You have played strip poker. [[I wish I could play this all the time though]] You are Catholic. You are atheist. You recycle regularly. You are a brunette. You have dated a blonde. You are friends with a redhead. You are taller than your mom. You are taller than your dad.  You have a bank account. You’ve written a check for less than $5. [[who writes checks]] You have visited the Statue of Liberty. You have visited the Eiffel Tower. You have visited Big Ben. [[coming soon though]] You have visited the Colosseum. You have visited The Great Wall of China. You have never been out of the country. You have been a waiter/waitress. You own a Bible. You own something with a Pentagram on it. You have used a Ouija Board. [[yeah, and it was boring :( ]] You have been a witch for Halloween. [[AND KIKI.The most important witch]] You have been a zombie for Halloween. [[I was Lois Lane zombie]] You have your eyebrow pierced. You have a tongue piercing. You have your nose pierced. You have no tattoos. You have more than 2 tattoos. [[I have two, why are we skipping from no tattoo to more than two?!!!!!]] You straighten your hair occasionally. [[aaaalways. when i’m not tired]] You have worn a dress in the last 3 days. You live somewhere that gets snow. [[sadly]] You celebrate Hanukkah. You were at your own house last New Year’s. [[ I was on a damn airplane T_T]] You were at a bar last New Year’s. You slept through last New Year’s. [[I slept on the plane]] You have worked on Christmas Eve. You have worked on Christmas.

You have been told ‘I love you’ by someone today. You were told by someone who’s not family. You slept in your own bed last night. You regret kissing the last person you kissed. You are wearing a necklace right now. You are wearing something red. [[MY UNDIES]] Yo u are wearing something blue. You are wearing something purple. Your phone number ends with an even number. You have kissed the last person you called/texted. [[have not and dont intend to, awkward]] You are currently listening to music.[[YESSS NATASHA AND PIERRE]] You are waiting for something. [[Always]] You don’t like seafood. You have eaten deer sausage. You have given a complete stranger your phone number. You have been hit on at work. You have been hit on by someone more than 20 years older than you. You have been whistled at. You were creeped out by it. You are a good speller. [[i’ve mispelled my name. as in, writing it manually on paper.]] You are very punctual.[[ and judgemental of those who are not]] You were dating someone in December of 2008. You are still dating that person. You have cheated on someone. You have been on a cruise ship. You have camped out in your own backyard. You are wearing something that doesn’t belong to you. You are a Pisces. You are an Aquarius. You are a Leo. You wonder what will happen when you die. You are afraid of the dark. You write in all capital letters. [[occasionally? WHAT A STATEMENT] You have been told you have nice handwriting. You have had a song written for you. You have had a picture drawn of you. [[kept scanned forever <3]] You have curly/wavy hair. You are wearing a watch. You are wearing flip flops. You wouldn’t date someone who smoked. You know someone with the same birthday as you. You are a morning person. You are a night owl. You slept in past 10 am today. You have big plans for next weekend. You are thinking of someone right now. Your job is stressing you out. You don’t have a job. You have never had a job. You were fired from your last job. You know sign language. You will usually try something at least once. You have been swimming in the last month. You are pessimistic by nature. [[i call it being realistic about things, but apparently some people call it this. so there.]] You have taken a ballet class. You have taken karate. You have taken gymnastics. You wish on shooting stars. You wish at 11:11. Your birthday has already come this year. You have been in a relationship that lasted longer than a year. You aren’t over your ex. You have gone after someone you knew was bad for you. [[crush wise, yes. obviously that means i didn’t ‘GO’ after someone because i’ve never had balls. WAS NOT BORN WITH ANY *joke, haha*]] You have let someone use you. [[oh so many times] You were/are a teenage mom. You are an otaku. You are a cosplayer. You were named after someone. You like your name. [[but i wish i had a second name]] Your last drink was water. You have visited somewhere said to be ‘haunted’. You have skipped school just because you didn’t feel like going. You have taken medicine when you ‘feel a headache coming on’. You are self-conscious about your body. You have a hangover You have a pet fish. You have had a Jehovah’s Witness show up at your house. You have godparents. Your parents are still married. You have step-siblings. You are the oldest.  You are adopted. You have a triplet. You don’t want kids. You want more than four kids. You have a bad temper. You have made out with a complete stranger. [[hoping to, but the BALLS thing^]] You usually make the first move in an intimate situation. You have broken your arm. You have had to get stitches on your face.  You have had an MRI. [[But I’ve had a CT scan and did not enjoy it.]] Your fingernails are painted. You like to draw. [[it calms me]] You like to sing. [[it calms me and takes away the calmness and peace of others]] You can play an instrument. [[been practicing piano lately]] You keep a lot of secrets from people. [[i don’t keep secrets, i just don’t talk about things unless asked about it. i’m pretty opened about everything.]] You don’t think people would accept you if they really got to know you. You don’t trust people easily. You borrowed something you really need to give back to someone. You drive a car older than a 2002. You have lost a friend you never thought you would. [[i guess it happens, i hate that it does]] You know a child who died of cancer. You know a teenager who died in a car wreck. You have done something illegal in the past 24 hours. You have cut your hair in the last week. You wear glasses. [[supposed to, but i almost never do]] Your favorite season is Autumn. Your favorite color is orange. Your favorite animal is a dolphin. You last rode in a car with a relative. You last rode in a car with a girl/woman. You last rode in a car with the person you are dating. You regularly watch Asian dramas. You love Chinese food. Your best friend is older than you. You have to go to school/work tomorrow. [[UUGHHHH]] You answered every question truthfully.

[anything-advice-blog]

[TIME SENSITIVE / URGENT] toxic friend

i kno u guys must get like thousands of messages and im so sorry for cluttering ur inbox and pushing this to the front of the line but im just. desperate and really scared and i need to know what 2 do abt this as soon as possible!!! also as a preface i apologize in advance if some of the way i word things in this come off as offensive or incorrect, etc - i truly, genuinely do not mean any harm so please feel free to correct me if i say something that isnt okay!!! also this is REALLY scattered and mega long so bear with me im really sorry! (also im so. so scared the person in question is gonna see this o H MY GOD so i may need to message this blog again asking for this post to be taken down maybe bc im really paranoid im so sorry!! i hope thats ok but i just dont want to risk her seeing this if this all blows up in my face ohrkjdghkjghfdgj!!!) (TW: SUICIDE MENTION, SELF HARM MENTION)

ok so. almost 2 years ago in early 2016 this girl i’d never met before drew me this incredible gift art for my birthday. we started talking and we found out we have a lot of things in common - we both draw and write, we’re just a few months apart from each other in age, we have similar interests and fandoms, n we live less than an hour away from each other and are one state away from one another - so we immediately hit it off n became super close friends. she was amazingly talented n super friendly and nice n stuff so i wanted 2 be friends w her anyways!!!!! @ the time she was in an online relationship with someone several years older than her who lived across the country, and she mentioned a few times she was feeling unhappy and insecure in that relationship and that long distance was really difficult but she was too devoted to her partner to break it off. the most important thing 2 note is that my friend has several severe untreated mental illnesses (depression, anxiety, ocd among others), regularly self harms, and is suicidal. im pretty sure im neurotypical (or at least i definitely am not suicidal / depressed, etc), so while i couldnt relate to a lot of the things she was going through, i always tried to be a listening ear to her and give her advice / support when i could because i knew she was going through a lot of rough stuff. she told me she doesnt have any friends in real life, her parents are separated and her family does not support her or even really know / care about her mental health, and she can’t access any professional help from teachers / counselors / therapists due to her severe anxiety and financial issues for some of the latter options listed. as her relationship with her partner began to crumble, i started bearing a lot of the weight of her struggles - she would vent to me and i would always have to be there for her to support her. i told myself that because she was mentally ill and didnt have any support i would take on that role so she wouldnt have to suffer. over the summer of 2016 she almost attempted suicide like…. twice??? and i talked her out of it and it was terrifying and really exhaustimg to constantly be worried about her.

then almost a year ago, in the winter of 2016, she started getting… clingy? we started talking a lot more and i didnt really get like any bad vibes from her but we were pretty much joined @ the hip and stuff and we started telling each other all of our secrets (so this is when i found out her relationship with her girlfriend was starting to crumble, which i didnt previously know) also she started constantly drawing me stuff??? like Drowning me in gift art and i felt really bad for not being able to reciprocate but she told me not to worry and that she used art as a coping method and stuff. at this time, i was going through some stuff too - obviously not as severe as depression / self harming, etc, but i had just gotten out of an almost-relationship with someone i knew from school, and i was doing my best to distance myself from romance in general since i didnt feel mature or confident enough to be in a romantic relationship yet. i told my friend that i was uncomfortable about the prospect of being in a romantic relationship and she seemed to understand.

anyways right around my birthday this year she revealed to me that she was madly in love with me (???!!?!?!?!?!!?!!?). mind you we had never even talked to each other / video called or ANything like that and we had only sent each other One (1) selfie and. it made me really uncomfortable because she said that like i was her moon and stars and her whole world and everything and she constantly dreamed of me??? and that she had been secretly like writing me love poetry and drawing me Even More Art i didnt even know about and…… it was. really overwhelming. it bothered me for so many reasons besides the fact that we had never communicated outside of like chatting / sending messages back nd forth like…. ok she was still in that long distance relationship at the time even though it was crumbling, and she KNEW!!! that i was uncomfortable about romance but she told me anyways and stuff!!!!!! and AHHH it was just really bad. so i panicked over it for a day or two because i was scared that if i Firmly Said No that she would spiral into a depressive episode and actually fatally harm this time but i wrote her this huge long letter letting her down very, very, VERY gently and apologizing for ever leading her on and stuff. and. she never actually wrote back to that letter or told me that it was okay???? which….. should have been a red flag 2 me but. we moved on as friends even though we did this conscious of the fact that she still loved me like that and i didnt feel the same way. looking back on it i regret it so much because i told her that like i would Always Be There For Her Forever and stuff and??? gfkjhgk yeah it wasnt a good time.

its been almost a year since then. in the spring i got my first smartphone and we added each other on a lot of social media stuff including snapchat and moved all our conversations there, then we decided to call each other and exchange phone numbers and see how that worked. i didnt really think much of it and was excited to hear her voice and have a conversation with her but…….. suddenly that one call turned into two and two turned into three and within a few weeks we were calling each other like All The Time (at least once a week if not more) and like making these really fucking elaborate schedules to call each other????? WHICH LIKE i dont think is a normal thing friends do idk if im wrong but!!!!! i literally call None of my other friends except for her, and a lot of that is bc i actually get really anxious and uncomfortable talking on the phone?? (also not to mention my mom doesnt really like me talking on the phone either….) but i never really told her that it made me uncomf or that it was difficult to mnge like i guess it just kinda.. Happened and became the norm. so now on top of constantly messaging each other multiple times a day now we were calling frequently too and there was suddenly a lot more pressure in our relationship because i had to stress out over making a large amount of time in my day to talk to her. i graduated high school this spring and having to balance the extreme emotional load of that major change with like… suddenly having to fall all over myself to make time to talk to this girl i didnt even really know?? was just really bad and i regret it so much because i feel like i missed out on fully experiencing it i guess. im really really passive and im TERRIFIED of confrontation and i dont like saying no to people or telling them if im uncomfortable because They Will Get Mad At Me and it was especially worse bc of my friend’s mental health and so she and i would talk for hours on end because i was afraid that if i got tired and ended the conversation without a legitimate excuse she would get mad at me and hurt herself. since we could fit way more conversation into like… long long hours of talking and talking, we ended up like. just telling each other literally Everything and she “eventually” fell out of love with me and started trying to meet people who she actually knew irl to date!! which was. kinda good bc she met this one girl and they hit it off but then it turns out she was just….. queerbaiting my friend??? which Sucked so that obviously didnt work out. and then she met another girl on this dating app and they started going out and my friend started talking to me less for a little while. it turns out though……. that my friend’s new girlfriend lives in my town??? like i dont know her but bc of that my friend and i almost met in person bc the two of them met up and went out together and stuff and they were gonna drop by and see me but that didnt work out. im getting off topic here but my point is……… she told me she wasnt in love with me anymore and she started seeing other people.

sadly she and her gf recently broke up. their relationship was also really unhealthy just like…… All Of Her Relationships and that other girl broke up with my friend because she said she needed space (she was depressed too and needed to recover and my friend was being too clingy and attention seeking and stuff so she just ended it in the middle of the night over text.) ofc ive stuck around for all of this and my friend has vented about every tiny detail of this relationship to me and its…. been So Stressful. now that shes single again she’s more depressed than ever - over the summer when she was dating that other girl she stopped self harming but she started again when their relationship started going south and now im really scared she’s gonna hurt herself, esp bc she tried to commit suicide again a few months ago which was terrifying. also another thing thats made me REALLY uncomfortable!!!!!!!! is that she Keeps Bringing Up the fact that she was in love with me whenever we talk on the phone??? like Every Single Time We Talk, Without Fail. even when she was talking abt her new gf with me sh was like. comparing her attraction to her gf to her attraction to Me and talking abt how they were similar and different and. i never had the guts to tell her it bothered me but god it just does So So Much!!!!! because we were never in a real relationship and she doesnt even really know me KDSJFHKHGAHHH im rambling so much this makes no sense at all and this is so long im so sorry ahhhh but im… Stressed!

so….. we’re running up on two years since we’ve met and one year since she told me she loved me. im in college now and she’s still in high school, and she’ll be i college next year too. again, i dont think that im depressed or mentally ill, but ive been struggling a LOT with the adjustment from hs to college and its been really really rough on me emotionally. now that my friend is single she’s been solely relying on me and trying to get me to call her multiple times a week because she needs the extra support now that she doesnt have her girlfriend anymore… but she doesnt seem to understand that i i just dont have enough time or energy to give all of myself to her and fall all over myself to make her feel better, especially when i already feel suffocated by her to begin with AND when im suppposed to be starting this new life and putting all of my focus into that. we’re mutuals on every single social media i have and i feel like im constantly being crushed by guilt whenever i do anything for myself or post stuff bc she can see what im doing constantly. and like she asked me to turn my read receipts on when we started moving from snapchat to texting and i have them turned off regularly so i did and it was really uncomfortable. i keep bending myself over backwards to mke sure im making her happy bc im all she has left.

neither of us have good relationships with our moms and so we’re always sneaking around to call each other and lately ive been calling her at school because obviously my mom isnt there and its less of a hassle to sneak around her and and talk……. but its a double edged sword bc i keep having to isolate myself and skip clubs / studying / hanging out with friends and socializing to talk to her and listen to her vent and its just so exhausting and i feel like im starting to seriously fall behind in other areas of my life im supposed to be getting better in. its hard enough adjusting to this and missing high school and stuff and trying to learn how to be an adult and be independent, and having her weight over my shoulders just is making things so much worse. but if i tell her that she’s choking me she’ll hurt herself (she’s literally said to me, Multiple Times (and recently!!!) that if it werent for me she’d be dead by now or she would kill herself and stuff and im the only thing she’s living for at this point. which. i dont know how to feel about that). i feel so trapped and i can’t say or do anything that indicates that im uncomfortable because she’ll get mad at me and make these passive agressive little side comments or do these alarmed emoticons and stuff or give me the silent treatment for a day or two (which is always scary bc like its Good when she’s not talking to me but when she doesnt im scared that something horrible happened to her!!!!!) and its just. god. ive started lying to her and coming up with fake excuses to get out of calling her because the thought of having to go isolate myself in these empty courtyards or nooks and crannies of my college campus is growing more and more uncomfortable and terrifying to me and i just cant fucking be honest about it because i suck. when i talk on the phone with her i have to be really fake and smiley and stuff and all she does is ramble about how horrible things are going for her and then i have to try and give advice when i just am so bad at talking and socializing already and im dealing w my own stuff and its… Awful. im so so weighed down by this nd i know that if she knew she’s being a…. b*rden to me right now she would be devastated and harm herself and stuff so i cant say anything and im spiraling out of control with THI s but you get the point im just really uncomfortable Always!!!! and i feel like my own emotions are completely 100000% inferior to hers because she’s gone through so much more than me and stuff???? and idk if thats True or if its just the way i feel but i just cant do anything around her bc shes like a ticking time bomb and anything i feel or try to do to protect myself from getting hurt will be selfish bc shes hurting way mre than me!!!!!!!!

anyways her birthday just happened a couple weeks ago and i bought her a tiny present and drew her somehting (i felt super guilty about not doing More for it though because shes done so much for me and also literally nobody except me remembered her birthday, not even really her own family). i havent mailed it to her yet (i told her i would send it this weekend, which is why this is marked as urgent) but we just exchanged addresses for the first time so now she not only knows my name, my age, what i look like, my Entire Backstory Ft. My Deepest Darkest Secrets, and how to reach me whenever she wants wherever she wants, but now she knows Exactly where i live and where i go to school too lol yay!!! anyways im getting really really anxious because i just had my midterms for college and didnt talk to her for an entire week last week but this happened right after her gf broke up with her and i think shes mad at me for taking a week off of talking to her. we were gonna call again today but i weaseled my way out of it bc it was so overwhelming and now i have to mail her this gift this weekend and my mom and other fmily members are all yelling at me about it and demanding that i just like…. Not Send It To Her because i dont owe her anything and tht i should just cut her off but if i do she’ll hurt herself nd she follows me everywhere and knows all of my secrets and stuff and idk im just scared that if i end our friendship she’ll try to ruin my life!!!! Like i dont think she would be petty like that or turn people against me or anything but she’s so obsessed with giving all of herself to other people nd she’s literally said she cant function without being 100000% devoted to somebody and like even after she’s broken up with all these other girls she still…. is obsessed with them and angsts over them and stuff and she does that with me even though i never even dated her or anything aND ITS JUST bad

like. idk i just really needed to get all of that out and im sorry it was so so so long and i dont even know what to do but i guess i marked this urgent because like. do i send her the present???? should i try to just like quietly distance myself from her real subtly so she wont notice or should i just straight up tell her that i cant breathe around her anymore and i just. really need space??? or like to not be friends anymore even though we know everything about each other??? am i being manipulated or is it jsut All In My Head that our relationship is toxic??? like idk if i shoud even cut her off completely or aNYTHING or if we could like even go on being just acquaintances from now on and saying hi to each other from time to time. and i feel so mean and bad for writin all of thisstuff about her when i know shses so vulnerable and i havent concretely communicated Any discomfort around her so if she saw this she would immediately know it was about her and do something Terrible to herself nd she constantly spams me with memes about depression and wanting to die and like…. blows up my phone with like 50 text messages at once and its just so so so much to worry about and i!!! just!!!!!! cant function like this anymore!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHH!!

anyways that was a huge disorganized mess and im kinda shaking and i dont even think i got all of it down or communicated how trapped and helpless i feel. ive never been in any situation like this before and i hate that she’s…. yeah. she’s really like manipulated me and stuff and i dont know how to get out of it. every time i think about it i feel like bursting into tears because im just so stuck and i dont even know if the way im feeling is even valid or if its all just lke. in my head or something and this is how friends really are Supposed to be because ive never really had a great social life either and my best friends are honestly my brother and sister and they mean everything to me and so i have friends outside of my family but like idk i never like. really was that close with any of them nad stuff nad idk this isnt about me BUT i just uhhh. am kinda crying a little bit and im sorry fo rbeig a big baby about all of this its all my fault for being a Human Doormat and letting people walk all over me nd tellin myself that i can bear that weight when i really have never taken good care of myself before Ever In My Life and stuff. but anyways im gonna stop rambling now and just… to whoever reads this or responds to this or whatever just thank you for hearing me out even if you think im wrong / crazy / Terrible for feeling this way because it just has been so much and i dont know what to do.

Hey there!

There's a lot going on here, but the bottom line seems to be this; you're in a friendship that you don't want to be in, and that you feel is unhealthy for you.

You are not her therapist. You can't fix her, you can't treat her, you can support her, but that's it. You aren't responsible for her. You're forcing yourself to put all this time and energy into something that you're super uncomfortable with, and don't want to be doing, and it's draining you and destroying your own mental health. You have to put yourself first. It's okay to want to help people, but you HAVE to put yourself first, or else you'll burn out and you won't be able to help anybody.

At the very least, you need to talk to her about how you're feeling, and tell her you need to tone down your relationship. What's happening absolutely isn't fair to you. All you can do to help her is your best, and right now, you're not doing your best because you're not taking care of yourself.

I know you're concerned about her hurting herself or killing herself, but you have to understand that you are not responsible for her. If she does something to herself, it's not as a result of your actions. She's traumatized and mentally ill, and those factors are what causes her to hurt herself. Not you. You are not and can not be responsible for her. Period. If she tells you she's going to kill herself or severely hurt herself, you have her address. Call 911 and ask them to dispatch help to her house. She might hate you for it, but an angry person is far, far better than a dead person. That action very well might save her life, and get her the help that she needs, so don't be afraid to do it.

As for the present, it's totally up to you. You did promise it to her, and fulfilling that promise might help you let her down a little bit more gently. At the same time, giving her a permanent reminder of you could hurt her. Maybe you should ask her? Tell her about how you're feeling and that you can't keep going with this intense of a relationship, and have a conversation about that. During that conversation, you could ask if she still wants the present. She might get angry, or it could help soothe her, or maybe she'll have a totally different reaction. It's hard to know.

This conversation is going to be super, super hard. It's going to be hell, quite frankly. She's a super sensitive person, and she's probably not going to take it well. So remember what I said before, about her not being your responsibility, and do a LOT of self care working up to the conversation and after the conversation. I'd recommend making a self care kit, and putting things in it that help calm you down. My personal self care kit contains nice smelling lotion, soft fabric, stuff to play with, gum, tea bags, and notes from friends reminding me that they love me. You could also be texting a friend during the conversation, so that they can reassure you and help talk you through it.

You may not be going through the same things she is, but your feelings and your struggles are valid. You don't need to destroy yourself to help someone that's "worse" than you are. You need to take care of yourself, and keep yourself as healthy as possible. You aren't any less valuable simply because you're not traumatized or self harming. Your mental health is important, and you need to do what's right for you.

I hope this helps!

♥ - Fawn

[s3venpounds]

1-102

102 questions? damn thats gonna be tough my guy but aight

1. Think of the last person who said I love you, do you think they meant it?

i do. at least, i trust in them enough to not take the phrase lightly.

2. Would you date an 18-year-old at the age you are now?

considering im 22 thats not that huge of a gap, considering some people have like a 10 year difference. so yeah i guess

3. When’s the last time you were aggravated and happy at the same time?

pretty recently actually, went to a birthday party of an acquaintance and i didn’t really enjoy myself til i went to sing karaoke but my drunk friend was being hella annoying at the same time

4. Would you ever smile at a stranger?

i do that on the daily so yeah

5. Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are?

i mean probably, humans can’t do ANYTHING without having both a positive and negative influence

6. Have you heard a song that reminds you of someone today?

yeah Spire- Reverie( feat FAWNA) that song was sent by said friend that i got reminded of =]

7. What exactly are you wearing right now?

red plaid boyfriend style shirt, pepperoni pizza print socks, superman boxers and some athletic shorts with my highschools logo and colors 

8. How often do you listen to music?

whenever im not talking to someone, playing games, or in a serious atmosphere

9. Do you wear jeans or sweats more?

sweats after wearing sweats style pants for so long its hard to go back to my skinny jeans

10. Do you think your life will change dramatically before 2013?

considering its 2017 and literally nothing happened in 2013 but my graduation then no

11. Are you a social or an antisocial person?

both? i think im one of those things you call an ambivert.

12. Have you ever kissed someone whose name begins with the letter ‘A’? 

yeah and he was way too timid about it man like ‘s just a kiss

13. What about ‘R’?

nope all my friends with an r name arent close enough for me to try that shit

14. Can you drive a stick shift?

nope would love to learn though

15. Do you care if people talk badly about you?

yep. mostly so i know where to tweak my personality so i can improve as a person i guess but yeah i tend to get paranoid

16. Are you going out of town soon?

not to my knowledge no, but it wouldnt be the first time my parents pull out “surprise” plane tickets to go somewhere i didn’t want to and on such short notice

17. When was the last time you cried?

mmmmmm can’t remember, so its not in the past 6 months or so

18. Have you ever told someone you loved them?

yeah, went downhill afterwards

19. If you could change your eye color, would you?

blue or purple if possible thatd be dope

20. Is there a boy who you would do absolutely everything for?

no not really

21. Name something you dislike about the day you’re having.

how hungry i am and the lack of food

22. Is it cute when guys kiss you on your forehead?

considering im not gay or at least not confirmed yet, no. 

23. Are you dating the last person you talked to?

dunno, not even sure where we stand

24. What are you sitting on right now?

a folded up blanket and an old office chair

25. Does anyone regularly (other than family) tell you they love you?

its not everyday but when i say i love them they say it back so thats nice

26. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have?

yep, multiple times. but yknow oh well right? i would rather something be left where it is than go through an extra excruciating chapter of hurt just because i fell in love with someone i barely knew

27. Who was the last person you talked to before you went to bed last night?

A.T

28. Do you get a lot of colds?

nope infact the last time i got sick was 2 years ago i believe

29. Where is the shirt you are wearing from?

blue notes, it was on sale and it WAS really soft not its just eh soft

30. Does anyone hate you?

HAHAHHAA yeah. one of my friends confirmed it too still do i think

31. Do you have any empty alcohol bottles hidden somewhere in your room?

why would i hide them.. these questions were clearly made for someone under 18 and i apologize for reblogging without reading them

32. Do you like watching scary movies?

FUCK.NO.FUCK YOU FOR MAKING ME WATCH THEM AND FUCK YOU FOR BRINGING THEM NEAR ME

33. Do you want your tongue pierced?

nah sounds like too much maitenence

34. If you had to delete one year of your life completely, which would it be?

my first year. erase my existence. nah im kidding i would probs delete last year or the year before that anywhere in that time frame

35. Did you have a dream last night?

nope sadly =[

36. When was the last time you told someone you loved them?

the day before yesterday we were both v sleepy after movie night

37. Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years?

nope. marriage is an annoying thing and until i find someone worth all that struggle not gonna happen. but ive got a good feeling about this one

38. Do you think someone has feelings for you?

considering they said i love you yeah i would hope so

39. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?

that same person also said this a few days ago so yeah i think so

40. Did you have a good day yesterday?

yeah found some old classic songs and got my body groovin that night

41. Think back 2 months ago; were you in a relationship?

nope 

42. In the next 48 hours, will you hang out with a girl?

nope

43. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you?

no… and now i feel a little sad

44. What’s the best part about school?

when all ur friends did something amazing yesterday and they talk about it with u all excited and shit

45. Do you have any pictures on your Facebook?

yep , some are really cringe worthy 

46. Do you ever pass notes to your friends in school?

nope i just texted notes were too hard to pass without getting caught

47. Do you replay things that have happened in your head?

yeah a lot to the point im almost there

48. Were you single over the last summer?

yep

49. Is your life anything like it was two years ago?

yeah a little

50. What are you supposed to be doing right now?

chores, usual adult things, maybe cooking

51. Do you hate the last guy you had a conversation with?

nah i dont hate him, maybe not on the best terms with em but yeah

52. Are you nice to everyone?

nope there are some people that just rub me the wrong way

53. Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to?

yeah 100%

54. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat?

are you serious? 6 months? thats so short, how the hell anyone falters at that point? i expect people to start cheating ATLEAST at the 1 year mark 

55. Are you good at hiding your feelings?

not very to be honest. i wear my heart on my sleeve as a friend says.

56. Do you think you like someone?

yeah i think i do

57. Have you kissed someone whose name starts with a ‘J’?

no…….?

58. Do you prefer to be friends with girls or boys?

boys are fun for mindless fun but girls are more for sentimental stuff. both are equally nice to be around

59. Has anyone of your friends ever seen you cry?

yeah tequila is a bitch

60. Do you hate anyone?

yep! same person who hates me!

61. How’s your heart?

like spiritually or like physically. havent gotten a medical check up so dunno, and spiritually? its being taken care of so thats nice

62. Is there something that happened in your past that you hate talking about?

yep! and i refuse to talk about it =]

63. Have you ever cried over a guy?

nope never

64. Who is probably talking a load of crap about you right now?

person who hates me HEH maybe even my best friend but in an endearing way like “ this fucking bitch decided to snort fucking fundip hes my friend but god damn hes a fucking dumbass”

65. Are your toenails painted pink?

nope i wouldnt mind painting em tho

66. Will your next kiss be a mistake?

probably i make a lot of them

67. Girls love it when boyfriends cry; correct?

they better not. youre a shitty person for pushing someone to that point. 

68. Have your pants ever fallen down in public?

yeah, sometimes on purpose sometimes on accident, sometimes cuz i wanted to

69. Who was the last person you were on the phone with?

A.T

70. How do you look right now?

like shite mate i havent showered yet

71. Do you have someone you can be your complete self around?

yeah Justin HEH

72. Can you commit to one person?

i damn hope so otherwise life is gonna be hella lonely

73. Do you have someone of the opposite sex you can tell everything to?

yeah! 

74. Have you ever felt replaced?

yep. multiple times too

75. Did you wake up cranky?

nope woke up horny. thats what happens with morning wood

76. Are you a jealous person?

yeah, the more amazing someone is the more jealous i get

77. Are relationships ever worth it?

i wanna say yes so yall dont shy away from them but like real talk its fucking aggravating, a lot of work, and tiring sometimes. anyone who says otherwise is glossing over shit or hasn’t seen the whole spectrum yet

78. Anyone you’re giving up on?

yeah about 98% done too

79. Currently wanting to see anyone?

yeah 

80. Name something you have to do tomorrow?

the same tiring shit as everyday pinky try and take over the world

81. Last person you cried in front of?

justin

82. Is there someone you will never forget?

Azley.

83. Do you think the person you have feelings for is protective of you?

considering they stayed up with me while i was hitting an emotional low yeah i would think so

84. If the person you wish to be with were with you, what would you be doing right now?

cuddling, probably freaking out that we’re physically right in front of each other

85. Are you over your past?

nah, i like my past as shitty, cringy and heartbreaking as it is i love it

86. Have you ever liked one of your best friends of the opposite sex?

yeah isnt that how relationships happen….?

87. Is there anyone you can tell EVERYTHING to?

yeah justin

88. If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept?

yeah i’d accept it, then close the door.

89. So, the last person you kissed just happens to arrive at your door at 3AM; do you let them in?

yeah cuz its fucking cold outside my dood, here lemme get some tea or some shit youre probs freezing

90. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated?

honestly yeah i once had this really spotty conversation with a girl literally everyone in the school hated at the time. then i realized wow, im just horny and have no substantial feelings for this person and if i do go through with this i will regret it

91. Will you be in a relationship in 2 months?

i dont know i dont like to think very far

92. Is there anyone you know with the name Michael?

yeah he grew out his hair like that annoying french kid in the will smith movie hitchcock that kept calling him  le petite asshole

93. Have you ever kissed a Matthew?

nope

94. Were you in a relationship in January? How was it going?

nope 

95. Were you happy with the person you liked in March?

nope HAH

96. Don’t tell me lies, is the last person you texted attractive?

considering the last person was my brother fuck no. hes ugly as all hell

97. Who do you have texts from?

uhh, my brother, my best friend, my brother in law, my phone company, and a close friend

98. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say? i would cheer em on while i get fetch the crown royal hidden in the back of the pantry

99. Have you ever kissed someone older than you?

yeah not that much different from anyone else really

100. Who’s in your profile picture with you? 

no one unless you mean the person who took the photo then my cousin

101. Ever kissed under fireworks?

no, and i dont plan to now. i hate them.

102. Has anybody ever given you butterflies?

yes.

overall this shit has gotten my mood a little low so if yall excuse me im gonna mentally drown in music