#sadja innocentes

[amabiliaaa]

odaa drabble dump:

oh look, a taglist: @extraisthmus​ you asked to be tagged in everything so here you go enjoy whatever the heckaroo this is sorry not sorry

Prompt: “How are you dealing with this?” 

                “Very Poorly.”

Kira made no attempt to hide her smirk. “That’s obvious. Have you tried using the plunger?”

“Yes, I tried using the fucking plunger what do you think I’ve been doing this entire time.”

“So. Tell me. How did you end up in this situation?”

The ‘situation’ Kira was referring to was Sadja hunched over a toilet gripping onto a plunger for dear life. 

Sadja tugged on the plunger. “I…” she avoided eye contact and muttered the rest of the sentence.

Kira leaned against the doorframe. “Hm? Sorry, I missed that last part. Can you repeat that, please?”

Sadja blushed. “There was no more toilet paper on the roll, so I used...iusedpapertowels.

“Sorry. One more time, please. And don’t forget to enunciate.”

 “Oh, give me a break.” She gave a firm tug on the plunger. “I used paper towels, ok? I flushed paper towels down the toilet, and now it’s clogged, and for some fucking reason, the plunger is now stuck inside this goddamned toilet.” She was in the air now, flapping her wings furiously as she yanked at the stubborn thing. Finally, something gave way, and the demon was sent flying backward. Instantly, she sprang back up and held the plunger over her head triumphantly. “Yes! Finally! I got it out! I got it—” She lowered her hand only to see that the stick had been wrenched free, and the rubber part was still firmly stuck in the bowl. “Oh, you’ve got to be shitting me.”

Kira made no attempt to conceal her laughter now. “Oh, this is too good. So. Sadja Innocentes puns when upset. Good to note.” 

Sadja threw the stick across the room. “I did not—!” She paused. “For fuck’s sake, I did.”

“Wow. This is a really shitty situation, huh?”

“Shut up.”

“I bet you feel really crappy, don’t you?”

“Piss off.”

“Oh, she makes another one!”

“Has anyone told you that you’re an asshole?”

Kira only cackled in response.

“So, are you gonna help me, or are you just gonna stand there and laugh?”

Kira pushed herself from the doorframe. “Alright, alright. I’ll help you. But can I ask you a question first?”

“Fine.”

“Why didn’t you just ask me to bring you a new roll? Or make a new one yourself? Better yet, why didn’t you use your powers to unclog the toilet?”

Sadja took one look at Kira’s shit-eating grin before pointing to the door.

 “Get out.”

~~~~~~~~~

lmao is this absolute shit? yes. is it because it’s 1am and i just wanted an excuse to write toilet jokes? partly. will i regret writing this when im not sleep deprived or sick? honey i already do.

[amabiliaaa]

Of Devils and Angels Chapter 7

The Things I do to Piss you Off

word count: 1264

Previous

!!!! it’s out it’s out it’s out fucking finally lmao 

“I swear, if this pizza isn’t greater than the American Revolution, I’m gonna riot.” Sadja pulled the pizza oven and set it on the counter. “I ruined my nails for this.”

Kira rolled her eyes. “Oh, please. You only got some sauce under them. You’re fine, princess.”

“Whatever. So. Is your boredom cured, Your Highness?” asked Sadja in an obnoxious British accent.

In an even snottier accent, Kira curtseyed and said: “Quite. Thank you for your services, Lady Innocentes.”

“Of course, Queen Kira.”

“Now, if you would be so kind as to indulge in this delightful meal with me?”

Sadja bounced up and snatched two plates from the cupboard. “Oh, fuck, yes. My blood, sweat, tears, and demon magic went into this pizza. I’m not moving from this spot until we eat all of it.” She conjured up a pizza slicer and cut into it. “Two slices or three?”

“One, please.”

“Ugh. Boring.”

“Well, excuse me for not wanting to throw up by overeating.” Kira grabbed the plate from Sadja’s outstretched hand. “Thanks.”

“Cheers.” The two dinked their pizzas together and grinned. Before either could take a bite, a knock was heard at the door. “Ugh. Kira, did you invite someone over?”

“No. Did you?”

“I don’t think so?” She pulled out her phone and scrolled through it. “Nope. Nothing in here about inviting people to enjoy our pizza.”

Kira sighed and took a bite of her pizza. “You think it’s your ex again?”

“If it is— Ugh, I swear to you, if it is, I’m gonna hurl him off a cliff.” She looked at the door. “Yo! Libidine! We’re done. Over. Go away.”

A voice came from the other side of the door. “Sorry to disappoint, but Lusty isn’t here. You gonna open up or what?”

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Sadja dropped her pizza on the floor. “No. Is that..?”

Kira pinched the bridge of her nose and put the pizza down. “Yeah, I think it is.”

“No, it can’t be.”

“It totally is.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know.”

“D’you think that if we just, I dunno, not answer, he’ll go away?”

The voice laughed. “Nope!” The locked clicked, and the door opened.

Sadja ran a hand over her face. And picked up the other piece of pizza on her plate.“Oh, fuck me.”

Dominic winked at the demon. “Name a time and place, sweetie.”

Sadja sputtered. “You—I. Wh- ew. Don’t call me that.”

Kira put down her pizza. “What are you doing here? And how did you get in?”

“Can’t a guy visit his friends?” Dominic threw himself on the couch and sighed.

“We’re not friends. And get your feet off the couch.”

Dominic only nestled deeper into the cushions. “Since when?”

Kira walked to the living room and pushed his feet off the couch. “Since you decided to turn into a dick.”

“Whatever. So, what are you two lovely ladies doing here?”

“How did you get in?”

Dominic used his magic to summon the pizza Sadja dropped. A golden shimmer surrounded it, and it floated into his hand. “A magician never reveals his secrets.”

“Dominic.”

Dominic grinned and held up his hand. A ring of keys was looped around one of his fingers. “I got the keys to the castle, baby.”

Sadja dropped her pizza again. (it fell on the plate this time, much to Kira’s relief) “Are you kidding me? What the actual fuck. Bitch, this is the sixth time that we’ve changed our locks. How do you keep getting access to our apartment.”

Dominic merely pocketed his keys and took a bite out of the pizza. “I’m God. I can do whatever I want. Also, this pizza is shit.”

“Say that to my face, you egotistical bastard.”

“Ugh, you’re gonna make me move? But I’m so comfy.” He took another bite. “Ugh. Yep.” He sat up and looked Sadja dead in the eye. “This pizza is shit.”

Sadja’s eye twitched. “Ok. Nope. I’m done. Fuck this.” She stretched out her wings, and the pink Baphomet Pentagram materialized beneath her. “I’m leaving, and I’m taking my delicious pizza with me.” Grabbing the pizza tray, she glared at Dominic and flipped him off before she completely faded away from view.

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Kira sighed while Dominic cackled. “Alright, where’s Gabriel?” she asked.

Dominic scarfed down the rest of the pizza. “I don’t fucking know. I don’t fucking care. The bitch is probably crying in some library bathroom or something. Such a fucking wuss.”

“Dominic. You have a vocabulary. Use it. You don’t need to cuss in every sentence.”

“Such a wet blanket. Loosen up a little, will ya?”

“Do you...do you really not have anyone else you can bother?”

“Oh, I have tons. You guys were closer, though. Also, Sadja is so fun to rile up, no?”

“No.”

Dominic smirked. “Apage, Satanas. You gonna eat that pizza?”

Kira clenched her fist. “I live here; you can’t tell me to go away in my own home. And no. I’ve lost my appetite, thanks to you. Besides, didn’t you just say it was terrible?”

Dominic summoned the pizza off the plate and watched as it lazily floated to his waiting hand. “Oh. I lied. It’s not that  good, but I’d probably eat it again.” He took a bite and made a face. “Ew. It’s cold.” He held his hand over the (very clean and very white) carpet and dropped the pizza.

“Dominic!” Kira shot out her hand and just barely caught it with her magic before it hit the floor. “Alright, that’s it. Get out.”

“Aw, but I just got here!”

“You’ve overstayed your welcome. You weren’t even welcomed in the first place. You— Just— Anguis in herba.”

“You compare me to a snake? I’m offended. You know, in the Bible, a snake represents Satan. That’s you.”

“The Bible is complete bull, and you know it. Now get up, and get out. Please.”

“So polite. Because of that, I’ll leave. I’m bored again anyway. Peace.” He got up and stretched. Walking toward the door, he looked over his shoulder. “Tell Sadja that her hair looks stupid for me, ok? Thanks.”

Kira turned around and walked toward her bedroom. “I will not. Aeternum vale, Dominic Christus.”

Behind her, Dominic scoffed. “We both know that’s not true.” 

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Once she was in her room, she waited carefully until she heard the click of the door opening and closing before collapsing on her bed. Minutes later, Sadja walked in. “Kira?” she asked.

“In my room,” was the response. 

Sadja’s head poked in through the doorframe. “Hey. You ok?”

“I need a nap.”

“I felt that. Anyway, I brought you something.” Something jingled, and Kira looked up to see the demon grinning and holding up a ring of keys. The very same keys that Dominic had shown them earlier. Kira sat up. 

“Where did you get those?”

Sadja’s grin widened. “From his pockets.” Each word was soaked in smug satisfaction. “I got home a few minutes before he left. I heard he was still here, so I waited outside. Made myself invisible, followed him out for a few minutes so he wouldn’t suspect you or me, then I snagged ‘em. Surprised he didn’t notice me, honestly. I could’ve sworn he said something about my hair, though.”

Kira coughed. “Nothing. Where did you go?”

“Shopping with Serena, Aswang, and Lilith.”

“Lilith? Don’t you hate her?”

“Oh yeah. Total bitch. But she’s fake, and I’m fake, and it’s fun being fake together.”

Kira rolled her eyes. “You’re not fake towards me, right?”

Sadja shook her head fervently. “No. Never.”

“That’s good to hear. I’m...I’m glad.” Pink dusted Kira’s cheeks and Sadja smiled fondly.

“Good. Now...about that nap…”

Taglist:@extraisthmus @sergaku 

and i noticed that i  got a few new followers so if yall want to be added to the taglist, let me know! i’ll be more than happy to add you! ^^

Latin translations!  Aeternum vale - Farewell forever, Anguis in herba - A snake in the grass. A treacherous person, Apage, Satanas- Begone, Satan

um. hi. it’s been a while since i last updated, huh? 

long story short is that i just kept doubting my skills and i ended up spiraling into an out-of-control unhealthy thought process about my writing. i kept procrastinating, and i just lost all motivation, honestly. it’s not fun. i hate when it happens and it happens often. but it’s posted and i’m happy about it. i think i’m gonna give myself a limit of one chapter per month and just increase my update time from there. so. see you next month!

[amabiliaaa]

Tag game :)

thanks @extraisthmus​ for the tag! yall should look at their post :))

RULES:

A character has to answer 12 questions. 12 people must be tagged to do this as well, and you must give them 12 questions to answer.

Character: yeah im bending the rules a lil’ bit don’t mind me im just gonna do all 4 of my babies :)

Questions!

What is the most illegal thing you’ve ever done?

Dominic:  Nothin’. I made the rules, I can bend them to accommodate me. (behind him, Kira tries to speak but Gabriel shushes her)

Gabriel: Me? Um, w-well once I, uh, wait, this won’t get us in trouble, right? (the reporter shakes their head) Oh, ok. Good. So once one a Sunday, I found some dress shoes on the street. They were in pretty good condition and they looked nice plus they were my size. So I took them home with me and shined them at two o’clock. Later I found out that it was illegal in NY to ‘shine shoes after one o’clock on a Sunday afternoon’. (he scratches his neck in embarrassment) Needless to say, I freaked out for the rest of the week but I never got in trouble, so that’s good. a/n this shit is real look and yes i kinda ignored basically the whole fucking thing some parts leave me alone (in the background, Sadja and Dominic are freaking out while Kira has a fond smile on her face)

Sadja: Oh that’s easy. I stole a BUNCH of shit from one of my exes. Including his dog. He was a dick and a sleaze so I don’t really feel bad. Think...Henry the VIII and that was pretty much my ex but cuter, unfortunately. 

Kira: Hm, let me think. Oh once when I was younger, 18,000 or 19,000 years old maybe?  Around that time I was really reckless and had severe anger issues. That’s the understatement of the year, by the way. Anyway, let’s say that Pompeii may or may not have been my fault. So you could say arson is the most illegal thing I’ve ever done. (Behind her, Sadja and Gabriel look alarmed while Dominic cackles. “Oh shit,’’ he exclaims, “I remember that!”)

Describe yourself in three words

Dominic: Better Than You. Each word is capitalized, by the way.

Gabriel: Um, I don’t really know. Nice, quiet, and...patient?

Sadja: Fabulous, gorgeous, and fun!

Kira: Reserved, intelligent, straightforward.

Who would you really like to tell off?

Dominic: Sadja for being so annoying.

Gabriel: No one really. I don’t have a grudge against anyone, ha, ha.

Sadja: Dominic for being such a dick. Oh and my ex. For the same reason.

Kira. Dominic.

What would be your spirit animal?

Dominic: what type of stupid ass question is that?

Gabriel: I would say a baby penguin. They’re so soft and cute! (Dominic scoffs. “Nerd,” he says.)

Sadja: Phoenix. They’re so amazing. Like me.

Kira: Cat. 

Which person has had the most influence on your life and why?

Dominic: Me because I’m God.

Gabriel: Dominic! He’s such a good friend to me.

Sadja: Kira for teaching me how to be a better person.

Kira: Sadja for teaching me how to loosen up.

Do you have any siblings or pets? tell us about them!

Dominic: Nope. No siblings. Had a Rottweiler once. Named her Ripper. She was the baddest bitch in town. 

Gabriel: Well technically all angles are related. So...yes? And no, I don’t have any pets.

Sadja: Same as Gabriel’s answer. Just replace the word angels with demons.

Kira: No to both.  Though technically Dominic is my brother of sorts. But I don’t like to think about that. So I have no siblings.

What is your biggest fear?

Dominic: Don’t have any. Didn’t you hear me the first time? I’m fucking God.

Gabriel: Not living up to certain people’s standards and expectations.

Sadja: Spiders. 

Kira: Nothing, really. Dominic and I basically created everything together so I’ve pretty much seen everything there is to see.

Where are you most likely to be on a Saturday night?

Dominic: Out partying, drinking, getting laid. The usual.

Gabriel: Tagging along with Dominic.

Sadja: Out at the club or having a Netflix movie marathon in my room.

Kira: Babysitting Sadja at the club or reading.

How old were you when you had your first kiss? How was it?

Dominic: Fuck, I don’t remember how old I was. What I do know is that the chick I was kissing was shit at it. It felt like a fish was trying to survive in my mouth.

Gabriel: Oh, actually I haven’t had my first kiss yet. 

Sadja: I don’t remember either. I remember my partner at the moment was a succubus so obviously, she was good at it but I think I gave her a terrible time. Sorry, Sarryna.

Kira: Can’t remember but it was pretty ok.

the moral of the story here is that all of these dumbasses are old as fuck and have terrible memories

What type of music do you like?

Dominic: Pop, rap, y’know, good music.

Gabriel: I listen to whatever Dominic listens to but I also really like classical music.

Sadja: Anything that’s upbeat honestly.

Kira: Classical music. Beethoven is one of my favorite composers.

What is your biggest regret?

Dominic: Don’t have any.

Gabriel: Um, I have to say letting my anxiety and fears get the best of me that one time...

Sadja: A big chunk of my past to be honest. 

Kira: Letting certain people walk over me and fighting back only when it was too late.

What is your biggest insecurity?

Dominic: Get this through your thick skull. I’m God. I have no fucking weaknesses. 

Gabriel: I always wonder if I’m good enough.

Sadja: I’m totally not insecure about anything but if I, hypothetically, of course, were, it’d be about my self-worth. So Gaberonni and I would be on the same boat in this hypothetical. But it’s only a hypothetical. So I’m not insecure about anything. Honest. Stop giving me that look!

Kira: Sometimes I feel like my personality is too rude and standoffish. I don’t mean to drive people away and I feel like I do all the time.

Tags:

lmao bitch there’s no one to tag if ya wanna do it go for it!

My questions!

What is one thing people always get wrong about you? 

What would you want your legacy to be? 

What does the perfect day look like to you? 

Who’s your biggest hero? 

What makes you the happiest? 

If you had a superpower, what would it be? 

Where do you see yourself in 5 years? 

Do you believe in second chances? 

What’s on your bucket list? 

What is one thing you want to change about yourself? 

What makes you feel accomplished? 

How do you spend your free time?

[amabiliaaa]

Of Devils and Angels: Chapter 6

If We Never Met Yes, I’m Rewriting This Chapter (only the last part tho)

word count: 1095

lightly based on this song

Previous

Sadja often wondered how life would've been like for her and Kira if they never met each other. She knows how she would've been doing. Out partying each night. Waking up in someone else's bed all the time. Not Masking out of laziness and almost getting caught (she always managed to get away with it somehow). Getting drunk, being miserable… She bit her lip. Yeah, she would've been a mess. A drunken, depressed, lonely, irresponsible, immature mess.

But Kira...Kira would be on top of everything. Nothing would've changed for her. She would still be just as mature, just as responsible, just as happy, just as smart, just as perfect. The thought depressed Sadja a little bit. Was she really that irresponsible, that chaotic? That...stupid?

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"Whatcha thinking about?"

Sadja snapped out of her reverie and looked at Kira. "Oh, nothing. Just...things."

Kira brushed a pink lock of hair out of her face. "That's obvious. What things?"

"Nothing important. Just wondering how things would be if we never met."

She chuckled. "Oh, wow. Life would be very different indeed. I would be...sadder and more uptight."

"Wait, really?"

"Most definitely. Before I met you, all I thought did was walk around, maybe encounter Dominic and Gabriel, chew him out for slacking off, go to Hell, judge the souls, go to bed, wake up, repeat. Life was really grey for me, honestly. No color, no adventure, no excitement. And then you came around and shook up my routine. That was an experience."

Sadja smiled as she thought about the time they first met. "Yeah, who knew that we'd be where we are today."

"Honestly."

She snorted. "Who would've thought that Sadja and Kira would end up together?"

"Not me. If you told me a year ago that I would be with someone like you, I'd laugh in your face and call you psycho."

"I'd sob. Uncontrollably."

Kira shook her head. "Still," she said, "I'm glad we did end up together." She reached over and grabbed Sadja's hand. "Very glad."

Sadja smiled. "Same here." 

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The two stared at each other for a moment before Sadja shook her head. "Ugh, ok, that's all. Enough emotion, too much sensitivity. I still love you, though."

Kira laughed. "Yes, I know."

"Good. Now," she sat up and turned around so that her back was facing Kira. "Braid my hair?"

Kira scooted closer. "What type?"

"Two dutch braids."

"Sure thing." Kira started weaving strands of pink hair together before speaking up again. "So when are you learning how to braid your own hair?"

"When I break up with you. AKA never."

She scoffed. "Who said I wouldn't break up with you? Why are you the one doing the breaking up?"

Sadja turned her head a little. "Oh, hun. We both know that you're too soft to pull such a stunt."

"Oh, hun, I could turn you to dust right now if I wanted to." To prove a point, she tugged on Sadja's head a little

"Yeah, but you won't. Because you're too soft."

"Ugh."

"Exactly." With a satisfied huff, Sadja turned back around to let Kira finish her braiding. "Also, I'm hungry."

"What do you want for dinner?"

"I don't care."

"Pizza?" She tied the braid up with an elastic and moved to the next plait.

"Sure." She held up her and a pink haze started to surround it before Kira pinned it down. "Nope. we're doing it the old fashioned way." 

Sadja rolled her eyes. "Ew. Fine. But if you make us order Domino's again, I'm gonna run puke."

Kira smiled and shook her head. "Nope. No Domino's."

The demon brightened. "Papa John's, then?"

"Guess again. 

"Pizza hut?"

"Incorrect."

"Then what, Kira?" 

Kira tied up the braid with another elastic and waited for Sadja to turn around before answering her question. "We're making it."

Sadja blinked. "Like, making it making it? Making it as in taking dough and cheese and sauce and assembling the pizza ourselves?"

"Mhm."

Sadja flopped down on Kira's lap and kicked her legs. "Kiraaaa," she whined, "why do you have to make things harder for everyone?"

"What did you think 'old fashioned' meant? Ordering pizza? No, Sad. That's the modern way."

"Can't we order it? I'll even eat disgusting Domino's pizza."

"Nope."

"Kiraaaaa." The demon picked up a couch pillow and halfheartedly threw it across the room. "But where are we gonna get the ingredients?"

Kira leaned over and gave a self-satisfied smirk. "Get this," she said, "we are going to go outside, walk to the store, and buy the ingredients ourselves."

Sajda burst out laughing. "Oh, Ki. You got me there. I know for a fact that you wouldn't go outside for a pizza." When Kira didn't respond, her smile slid off like butter on a hot pan. "You're planning to go outside for a pizza." It wasn't a question.

"Yes, that's the plan." She snapped her fingers and a pair of tennis shoes materialized in front of her. She slid them on and stood. "C'mon. Get your shoes on."

"Kira."

"Sadja."

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Sadja rolled her eyes as she held up her hand to summon the ingredients. "Thank fuck you let me summon these." She watched as the dough, sauce, cheese, vegetables, and meat materialized above her hand and danced to the kitchen counter. "Still can't believe we have to make the damn thing, though. Why do you wanna make this anyway?"

Kira shrugged. "I dunno. I was bored."

Sadja scoffed. "Bored! Ladies and gentlemen, angels and demons, people of the palace! The Empress of Hell, the Daughter of Chaos is bored! And to compensate, she drags me, an innocent bystander—"

Kira snorted. "Innocent. Really."

Sadja continued on as if nothing happened. "—yes, an innocent. Pure. Holy bystander into her mess! Oh, woe is me!" She drops the act and cocks her hip. "You were bored, and out of literally anything, you chose to make a pizza."

"I didn't want to go outside."

"But you were about to. For pizza."

"Tomato, potato."

"Ew."

Kira smiles and reaches for a wooden spoon. "Hey," she said while pointing the spoon at her girlfriend, "consider it payback for dragging me to the bar the other night."

[amabiliaaa]

everything about this screams sadja and i love it

Foxy girl

[commissions open]

[buy me a coffee]

[amabiliaaa]

Six Sentence Sunday

from chapter 6:  If we never met Yes, I’m Rewriting this chapter (only the last part tho)

She scoffed. “Who said I wouldn’t break up with you? Why are you the one doing the breaking up?”

Sadja turned her head a little. “Oh, hun. We both know that you’re too soft to pull such a stunt.”

[amabiliaaa]

Fictober 19: Prompt #18: “Secrets? I love secrets.”

@fictober-event

Prompt number: 18

Original fiction

Name: Of Devils and Angels

Rating: G

Warnings: none :)

Kira rolled her eyes as Saja squirmed closer to her. “Of course you do.”

“So? Tell me. What’s your secret, babe?”

Kira gave her girlfriend a hard look. “You know how I feel about pet names.”

Sadja didn’t balk. “Yes, I do. So, baby. Tell me your secret. If you don’t I might be forced to call you sickeningly-sweet pet names for the rest of eternity.”

“Are you sure you want to go down this road? I’m very stubborn.”

“So am I, bae.”

“Disgusting.”

“Aw,” Sadja coos, “You love the attention. Don’t lie.”

“Since when have I lied?”

“Well if you really want to go there—”

Kira sat up straight, almost flinging Sadja across the couch. “No, let’s not go there. And sorry. Are you ok?”

The demon rubbed her jaw. “Yeah, yeah I’m fine. I mean, I have a broken jaw now and I might finally die but I’m fine.”

“Yeah, you’re ok.”

Sadja gave a loud hmph in response. “So, secret?”

“If I tell you, it won’t be a secret now anymore now will it?”

“It could be a secret between us?”

Kira pretended to think about it. “Nah, you can’t keep a secret.”

Sadja pouted. “Yes, I can!”

“Ok, so what about that time when I was planning to—”

Sadja lept across the couch and covered Kira’s mouth with her hand. “If you’re gonna say the Mark thing, I swear that I’ll find a way to kill you.”

“Devils don’t die,” said Kira. But with Sadja’s hand in the way, it sounded a lot like Dvbils don’t dive.

“Not yet they don’t.” She gave Kira her best puppy dog eyes. “Promise not to mention the Mark thing?”

Kira rolled her eyes and nodded. Once her mouth was free, she smirked. “Anyways, Mark—”

“Kira!”

“Fine, fine. Wanna know my secret? Come closer.”

Sadja instantly sat up and leaned in. “What?”

Kira leaned forward until her lips were brushing Sadja’s ear. “I love you.”

[amabiliaaa]

hi hello

just in case anyone stumbles upon my blog and tries to access the navigation bar, i know that it’s acting up. i contacted the person who made my theme so the issue should be resolved soon. in the meantime, here are the missing character bios:

KIRA SATANAS

In this house we worship and respect the devil

Name: Kira (Kai-ra- NOT key-ra she’s very particular about that) Satanas

Age: 21 (eons)

Sex: female

Sexuality: ace lesbian

Birthday: doesn’t remember-just celebrate on 6/6

Height: 5'4

Race: (appears as) Chinese

Eye color: red- wears brown colored contacts

Hair color- black (has an inverted bob)

Glasses? Yes but she doesn’t need them

Alignment: Lawful Good

Favorite weapon: (in this order) Scythe, daggers, pitchfork

Fun Facts: the devil, a lesbian, can see how many sins one has committed and what type of sins they’ve committed. 7 deadly sins are individual demons that she created as a child(she was kind of a bratty kid ngl) that serve her. She is very blunt and likes to get things done. Very straightforward and sarcastic. Strong as fuck. A fair judge- everyone in hell respects her. Has a pentagram tattooed on back, when she sees people’s sins, depending on how bad they are, she can either kill you where you are and send you to one of the 9 circles, or she will give you a second chance (not without smacking a little sense into you first). was once friends with dominic

Likes- consent, respect, cats, classical music, tea, equality.

Dislikes: Dominic Christus, racism, oppression, smoking, drinking, sex, being mistaken for weak

DOMINIC CHRISTUS

oh, look, a douchebag

Name: Dominic Christus

Age: 21 (eons)

Sex: Male

Sexuality: straight

Birthday: 7/7 (he thinks)

Height: 6'7

Race: (appears as) caucasian

Eye color: gold (wears green contacts if he feels like it)

Hair color: chestnut

Glasses? No

Alignment: chaotic neutral at first, then switches to chaotic evil

Favorite weapon: (in order) sword, pistols, his bare hands

Fun Facts: God. A fuckboy and an asshole (later turns insane and psychotic) Rude, loud, and obnoxious. Was once a good guy. Was once friends with Kira. Saved her from creeps once upon a time. Doesn’t know where all this Jesus nonsense came from but hey, they worship him so why not? Mary is actually his slutty side hoe. He DID create the 7 holy virtues but that was a LONG time ago. Good boy turned bad in the worst possible way. Supposed to judge others when they die and see if they should be sent to hell or not but shoves everyone to hell without judging them. Kira has to do extra work because of this. Has a tattoo of angel wings on his back.  (Started some wars because he was bored?) Also ripped as fuck. Even Kira has to admit he’s attractive much to her dismay. borderline racist and homophobic

Likes: calling Kira key-ra, drinking, sex, drugs, smoking, seeing humanity pitted against each other and tearing each other apart

Dislikes: anything kira likes, being told no, not getting his way

SADJA INNOCENTES

she wears slutty clothes because they're more functional

Name: Sadja (SAH-di-a) Innocentes

Age: 20 (millennia)

Sex: female

Sexuality: bi

Birthday: who knows just celebrates whenever she wants

Height: 5'6

Race: (appears as): caucasian

Eye color: pink

Hair color- pink

Glasses? No

Alignment: Chaotic good

Fun Facts: slutty clothes? Why not? They’re easier to move in. Also, they show off her assets. It’s a win-win. A demon who loves herself but loves her gf more. Helps gabriel get to understand and express himself and his sexuality more

Likes: Kira Satanas, herself, parties, herself, sleeping in, coffee, herself, annoying Kira,…has she mentioned that she really, really, likes herself?

Dislikes: children, making good choices, waking up early, being lied to

[amabiliaaa]

Of Devils and Angels: Chapter 1

This is Why You Don’t Listen to Your Demons

Day two of nanowrimo! Word count: 436

Previous

New York, 2019

“Kira, please!” Kira Satanas shook her head as she poured herself a cup of tea.”Nope,” she said, “not tonight.”

“Kiraaaa.” Sadja clasped her hands together. “Please? I promise to not get lost in the women’s bathroom again.”

“How did you even manage to do that, anyway? I’m still curious.”

“I was drunk, Kira. You can do anything when you’re drunk.”

Kira rolled her eyes. “Sorry, Sadja, but I’m not taking you anywhere.” 

“Don’t you love me?”

“Of course I do. Which is why I’m not taking you to the club tonight.”

Sadja snatched the tea out of Kira’s hand. “Fine then. I’ll go by myself.”

Kira glared at her girlfriend. “No. You won’t. And give me back my tea.” 

“Take me to the club.”

“I refuse to babysit you.”

Sadja stamped her foot. “I’m not a child! I know how to take care of myself.”

Kira arched an eyebrow and reached for her tea. “I know you can. You are one of the strongest women that I know. But when you get drunk, you are so helpless.”

“Which is why you’re going with me. So that you can make sure that I’m not helpless.”

“No.”

“Kira, I’ll cry.”

“No, you won’t.” Kira took a sip of her tea and walked to the couch.

Sadja flopped over the counter and fake sobbed. A few moments later, she looked up. “Is it working?”

“Your fake sobbing? No, it isn’t.”

Sadja groaned. “Kira. Come on. Just this once? I promise that I won’t get completely wasted this time.”

Kira snorted behind her mug as she turned on the TV. “You said that last time.”

“Ok but I actually mean it.”

“Uh-huh.”

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Kira sighed as she looked at her girlfriend on the dance floor. She gave the bartender a tight-lipped smile. “Uh, I’ll just have water, please.”

The bartender cast her an odd look and she sighed again. How was Sadja able to convince—no—manipulate her into going to the club? One moment, she’s watching Hell’s Kitchen in her pajamas, and the next, she’s watching Sadja seduce everyone on the dance floor. The bartender handed Kira her glass of water. She nodded at him and took a sip. 

“Well, well, well. Look what the cat dragged in.”

Kira lazily glanced over at the man, no, the boy standing next to her. “Dominic,” she said.

“Kira,” he drawled, pronouncing it as kee-ra. 

“It’s Kira,” she snapped.

Dominic raised his hands. “Whoa, my bad. Sorry, Kee-ra.”

Kira set down her glass and gave Dominic a good look. He was (although Kira loathes to admit it) handsome. Golden eyes and chestnut hair, toned body and full lips, he was built like a god. 

         Well, Kira thought to herself, he is God, so I suppose it makes sense.

[amabiliaaa]

Odaa excerpt just for fun!

if things go as planned, the whole chapter will be posted by tonight! aka im trying to avoid studying for finals help me

She drops the act and cocks her hip. “You were bored and out of literally anything, you chose to make a pizza.”

“I didn’t want to go outside.”

“But you were about to. For pizza.”

“Tomato, potato.”

[amabiliaaa]

I went to the mall today and I actually got some good clothing ideas ideas for Sadja (mostly) and kira and gabriel so I'm really excited!! Also thought of some new headcanons for my babes so yeah! I have a lot of fuel to write with now! ^^

[amabiliaaa]

Of Devils and Angels: Chapter Three

I Do Adore

Day 4 of nanowrimo!     

word count: 655    

Previous

Kira shoved her keys into the car while Sadja threw off her jacket. “Ugh, sometimes, I hate my wings. Takes so long to Mask them. Eyes are so much easier. She pulled down the overhead mirror and watched as her eyes faded from baby blue to hot pink. “And then it takes even longer to shake off the Mask.” She shook her shoulders and sighed impatiently as she waited for her wings to fade into view again. “Masking is stupid.”

Kira adjusted the mirror before pulling out into the parking lot. “Hey, Masking keeps the Ordinaries safe. Though Dominic doesn’t seem to care. If we don’t Mask ourselves, the Ordinaries would see us for what we really are. And that’s...not good.”

Sadja snorted and shook her shoulders again. “‘Not good’? That’s all you can say about it? That not Masking is ‘not good’?”

~✵~✵~✵~✵~✵~✵~✵~✵~✵~✵~✵ ~✵ ~✵~✵~✵~✵~✵~✵~✵~✵~✵~

Masking is the hiding of unnatural features in demons and angels. Such as eyes, (some have vibrant colored eyes, differently shaped pupils...some have no eyes at all.) horns, wings, fangs, scales, even body types (Medusa is very much real and her lower half is that of a snake’s.) If an Ordinary, or a mundane as some like to call them, sees a demon or angel (also known as Otherworldlies) without their Mask, the consequences are serious. Ordinaries have simple minds; they see things in black and white. If an Ordinary sees an Otherworldy without a Mask, then they would go insane trying to comprehend what shouldn’t be possible. Some unnatural traits can easily be excused, like having contacts, or extreme plastic surgery. Others can’t be explained, no matter what you say or do. 

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Sadja gave a happy sigh as her wings finally came into view. She unfurled them and proceeded to wrap them around herself like a shawl. “Not good,” she snorted. 

Kira gave her a sideways glance. “You know what I mean. If you don’t like it, why don’t you put contacts in? That’s what I do sometimes.”

“And risk poking my eye out just for a piece of colored plastic? Ha! You’re funny. And that just takes care of my eyes. What about these beauties?” She gestured toward her small leathery wings, pitch black with pink at the ends. “How do I hide them?”

“Beats me. Hey,” she said, not taking her eyes off the road, “I feel like Dominic has been treating Gabriel like garbage recently.”

Sadja snorted. “Like that’s news.”

“Yeah, I know but it feels more...intense. Like there’s actually some maliciousness behind the actions.”

“You think? Did you talk to him about it?”

“Kind of. I asked him why he puts up with that sorry excuse for God and he said it’s because he cares for him. That he knows that Dominic doesn’t mean any of it.”

Sadja sat up straighter. “I’ll call him tonight. He’s so young, Ki. Only 18 millennia.”

“I know. That’s why I’m so worried. Dominic can be more than just an asshole when he wants to be. I’m afraid that he’s going to break Gabriel.”

Sadja reached over and grabbed Kira’s hand. “He’ll be ok, Kira. He’s strong. And he has us to go to if things go too far.”  They arrived at a stoplight and Kira looked forward, stone-faced as ever. “ Kira. me specta, me specta.” Kira turned her head. “Believe me, he’ll be fine.” 

 “I adore you,” whispered Kira. “I don’t know what I would do without you.”

Sadja smiled and the light changed from red to green. “Probably stay in your room all day judging the pure and damned souls of the Earth.”

Kira shook her head and withdrew her hand. “Yeah, you’re probably right,” she said as she drove on. “You always are.”

[amabiliaaa]

Six Sentence Sunday

tmw you almost forget but remember at the last second

anyway this one is a little blurb of Sadja and Kira’s first meeting! idk when i’ll actually write the whole thing but yeah!

“So, what’s your favorite drink?” The woman sidled up to Kira and gave a drunk smile. 

“Pomegranate tea.”

The woman’s smile morphed into a confused frown. “Que.”

“Pomegranate tea.”

[amabiliaaa]

Of Devils and Angels: Chapter Six

If We Never Met

lightly based on this song

word count: 514

Previous

Sadja often wondered how life would’ve been like for her and Kira if they never met each other. She knows how she would’ve been doing. Out partying each night, waking up in someone else’s bed all the time, not Masking out of laziness and almost getting caught (she always managed to get away with it somehow), getting drunk, being miserable… She bit her lip. Yeah, she would’ve been a mess. A drunk, depressed, lonely, irresponsible, immature, mess.

But Kira...Kira would be on top of everything. Nothing would’ve changed for her. She would still be just as mature, just as responsible, just as happy, just as smart, just as perfect. The thought depressed Sadja a little bit. Was she really that irresponsible, that chaotic? That...stupid?

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“Whatcha thinking about?”

Sadja snapped out of her reverie and looked at Kira. “Oh, nothing. Just...things.”

Kira brushed a pink lock of hair out of her face. “That’s obvious. What things?”

“Nothing important. Just wondering how things would be if we never met.”

She chuckled. “Oh, wow. Life would be very different indeed. I would be...sadder and more uptight.”

“Wait, really?”

“Most definitely. Before I met you, all I thought did was walk around, maybe encounter Dominic and Gabriel, chew him out for slacking off, go to Hell, judge the souls, go to bed, wake up, repeat. Life was really grey for me, honestly. No color, no adventure, no excitement. And then you came around and shook up my routine. That was an experience.”

Sadja smiled as she thought about the time they first met. “Yeah, who knew that we’d be where we are today.”

“Honestly.”

She snorted. “Who would've thought Sadja and Kira would end up together?”

“Not me. If you told me a year ago that I would be with someone like you, I’d laugh in your face and call you psycho.”

“I’d sob. Uncontrollably.”

Kira shook her head. “Still,” she said, “I’m glad that we did end up together.” She reached over and grabbed Sadja’s hand. “Very glad.”

Sadja smiled. “Same here.” 

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The two looked at each other for a while before a sly smile crept upon Kira’s face. “Say...wanna cause some trouble?”

Sadja gasped. “Kira Satanas, getting in trouble? And causing it?” She fake fainted onto the couch. “Oh, what has the world come to?”

Kira rolled her eyes. “So, do you?”

Sadja sat up. “Oh hell yes. What are you planning?” 

“Oh, nothing, just a little prank on Dominic. I just texted Gabriel about it. He said he’s in.”

“Gabriel too? Has the world gone mad? Am I even talking to the right person?!” She shook Kira’s shoulders. “Who are you and what have you done with Kira?”

Kira laughed. “It’s nothing serious, I just want to annoy him.”

“What’re you planning, o suddenly mischevious one?”

“Well…”

[amabiliaaa]

just a lil’ odaa drabble

 idk what this is honestly. it was supposed to be ch 6 but i...struggled with this one. so i just turned this into a drabble *3*

 Sadja cuddled Kira’s sleeping body as she thought of everything that she told her. No doubt Kira was going to have nightmares. Sadja sighed. The mental strain that her job had was almost unbearable. Especially since Dominic pushes all of the work on her. She tightened her grip on Kira. How could he be so rude, so careless, so...so...Goddamned irresponsible? He acted like her before she met Kira. But she was a demon. He was God. He’s supposed to be the good one. The divine one, the holy one, the mature one. But he wasn’t. Kira was. She thought about all the things Kira had seen. There were a lot of good ones, they were like a breath of fresh air. People who strived to be the best and succeded. People who were pure and good. Some of them weren’t good or bad. They didn’t commit terrible sins, but they weren’t perfect, either. Kira usually sent them back to Purgatory to reflect. They usually ended up going to Heaven in the end. And then there were the true sinners. The ones who did wrong, knew they were doing wrong, and kept doing wrong or never did anything to amend their wrong. There weren’t many of them, but when the showed up they took a huge mental toll on Kira. The things they did were just pure evil. Kira squirmed and Sadja sighed. There they were. Judging by how things were going this early in the night, the nightmares were only going to get worse. She tightened her hold on Kira and closed her eyes. Pointless. She couldn’t sleep. Not when she knew that Kira wasn’t sleeping peacefully. She sighed for the umpteenth time that night. If she couldn’t sleep, the least she could do was try to make sure her girlfriend was sleeping as peacefully as possible.

[amabiliaaa]

Of Devils and Angels: Chapter Five

You Think Your Job is Hard? Try Judging Millions of Souls Each Night

Day six of nanowrimo!

Word count: 1433

Previous

Kira collapsed on the couch the moment they walked through the door and Sajda collapsed on top of her. “You ready to clock in?”

Kira groaned. “Honestly, no. But I have to do it. Especially since Dominic is probably still out partying. Let’s go.”

“Ugh. Five more minutes. I don’t feel like policing a bunch of sinners. I mean, the pure ones are easy to control but some of the sinners...ew.”

“Sadja...We can’t ditch work. Dominic already does that. And we can’t let Purgatory overpopulate. Get up, please.”

“But your boobs are so comfy!” She snuggled deeper into Kira’s chest and sighed contentedly.

Kira felt her ears heat up. “They’re not even that big,” she muttered.

“Still comfy.”

“Sadja.”

“Yes, Kira?”

“We need to go.”

“Five more minutes.”

“...Fine.”

Sadja squealed in delight. “Yes! Thank you, Kira!”

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“Sadja. Sadja, wake up.”

Sadja groaned and batted away Kira’s finger (which was poking her face in a very annoying way) “Five more minutes.”

“Your five minutes are up, Sad. It’s time to go.”

“Ugh, fine.” She rolled off Kira and sat up. “I’ll move the table.” Stretching out her wings, she floated up and moved toward the coffee table in front of the couch. With a snap of her fingers, a pink glow surrounded the table and it floated up and disappeared.

“Where’d you put it?”

“It should be in my old apartment in Hell.”

“Should be?”

Sadja shrugged. “I was thinking about the apartment roof when I was transporting it. So it might be on the roof.”

“What the hell were you thinking about the apartment roof for?”

“I dunno. I have weird thoughts sometimes. You gonna get the rug or do I have to put that on the roof also?”

Kira snorted. “Fine.” Kira held out her hands toward the rug. This time, a red haze surrounded it. It lifted into the air, rolled itself up, and propped itself neatly against the wall. On the floor where the rug once laid, was a scarlet Baphomet Pentagram. Kira shook her head. “Still can’t believe that a drawing that I did when I was fourteen billion years old is now an official symbol for  the Church of Satan.”

“Same. It’s not even that good. The goat looks all wonky.”

“Shut up. My artistic skills were amazing back then.”

“I mean…”

Kira rolled her eyes and back a smile. “Just get in the pentagram and let’s go.”

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“Everyone, if we get in a nice and neat line we all get to go home.” Sadja swooped around a group of people and tried to get them to calm down. “Please, people. Stand in a line. Even first graders can do this!”

“Ma’am?”

Sadja looked down and saw a nun trembling below her. She landed in front of her and internally rolled her eyes when the nun took a small step back. “How can I help you?”

“Is this Heaven?”

“No, ma’am it isn’t. Don’t worry, you’ll probably go to Heaven once Kira judges you. Y’know, with you being a nun and all. Unless you murdered someone. Did you murder someone?”

“S-so why am I in here? Why didn’t I go to Heaven? If this place is Hell why does it look so clean and pure? And no, I have never murdered someone.”

“Because Dominic is a mythic jackass who doesn’t do his job. Honestly, you’d probably be better off here. Where it’s clean. And pure. Because Kira is responsible and doesn’t want anyone to suffer. Unless you’re a murderer, then you get sent to one of the Nine Circles. Right now, you’re in Limbo. Easiest level. You sit here, reflect, then come back for another judgment. More often then not, on the second judgment, people either get a second chance at life or get sent straight to Heaven.”

“Who...who’s Dominic? And who’s Kira?”

“Dominic is what you would call God. Except he’s not at all what you’d expect God to be. And Kira is Satan herself.”

The nun’s brow creased. “Don’t talk about our Lord like that.”

“He’s not my Lord.”

The nun looked at Sadja up and down. “That’s...apparent.”

Sadja looked at herself. Thigh-high black boots, booty shorts, and hot pink bra with a mesh black crop top over it, she had to admit that she didn’t look like the sweet girl you saw at Sunday school. This time she really rolled her eyes. “Thanks, Sister. You have all your questions answered?”

“No—” 

“Great to hear it. See ya!” Sadja leaped into the air and flew off. Shuddering, she soared over to where Kira was sitting on her throne.

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Kira looked at the long line and suppressed a sigh. They really shouldn’t have taken those extra five minutes. She forced her gaze back onto the trembling man in front of her. “Come forward,” she said. 

“I p-promise, I ain’t never did nothin’ wrong,” he stammered, “I ain’t meant to be here, ma’am.”

“What’s your name?”

“William. William M. Aire.”

“William, I promise that I won’t hurt you. If you are innocent like you claim, I will send you up to Heaven. Now, please. Come forward and await your judgment.”

William walked up the steps and almost tripped on Kira’s long red and black skirt. She suppressed another sigh. When he finally reached her, she reached out her hand. “Bow your head, please.”

He bowed his head and Kira placed a hand on his chocolate skin. Instantly she saw every incident of his life from his birth to his death. “William Martin Aire,” she bellowed, “You disgust me. Your sentence is to reside within the Ninth and worst circle: Trechary and the Third Round: Ptolomaea.”

William dropped down to his knees. “P-please! I was forced to do it! It wasn’t my fault! I ain’t guilty, I ain’t guilty!”

Kira withdrew her hand from his head. “Silence. Your efforts to save yourself are fruitless.” She snapped her fingers and a pentagram formed beneath him. Black tentacles emerged and snaked around his ankles, waist, and neck.”

“Please,” he gasped, “give me a second chance. I know what I did was wrong. I’m willin’ to change.” 

Kira gazed at him with cold, dead eyes. She opened her palm, and William looked relieved. He reached for it as best he could and terror filled his eyes when she closed it into a fist. The tentacles tightened around him and yanked him down to the Ninth circle. His screams could still be heard until the pentagram disappeared and with it, William.

“Acta non verba,” she whispered.

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“That’s the last of them.” Kira stood up and stretched. “I can’t wait to go to sleep.”

Sadja grinned. “Ready to go home?” A pink version of Kira’s Baphomet Pentagram materialized beneath them. 

Kira gave her girlfriend a tired smile. “So ready.”

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Kira had just slipped under the covers when Sadja walked in, already dressed in her pajamas (if you count a bra and panties as pajamas, anyway). “Hey,” she said, “Can I come in?”

“Sure.” Eagerly, the demon crawled under the sheets and curled into her partner. 

“So, I have a question.”

“I probably have an answer.”

“That stuff with William, what did he do? You hardly ever send someone to Ptolomaea.”

Kira sighed. “It’s a long story.”

“We have all night.”

So Kira talked. She talked about how William willingly joined a gang dedicated to stealing, doing drugs, getting into fights, and taking advantage of anyone; women, children, even men. She talked about how he had raped his wife and daughter for months. He talked about how he let his buddies do whatever they wanted to his daughter as long as they paid the right price. She talked about how when people got bored of his daughter and no longer wanted to pay for a good time, he killed her. 

Sadja listened patiently without interrupting. When Kira was done, she merely hugged her and whispered nonstop into her ear: “You are so strong.”