#sad boy Airk

[raddireksstuff]

Airk Tanthalos, the oldest of Sorsha’s children and yet the second fiddle to both his father Madmartigan and twin sister Kit. The spare prince of Tir Asleen. My sad, beautiful, people-pleaser boy.

Growing up, did you ever want to cut your hair or get multiple piercings just to break the princely façade that your mother wanted you to have? Did you ever think of running away? Or was wanting and getting Sorsha’s acceptance and validation more valuable to you? then again you were never the wild child. never the rebellious one cuz that was Kit. And running away would mean being the same as your dad and that.... that is more detestable than feeling rejected by your mum.

But years of being ignored and being made to stand to the side must’ve been hard for you. Not that you wanted to be the King or whatever but just to be acknowledge and feel wanted. Do you really even like sleeping around? or was that the attempt to get your mother’s attention? You’re not the problem child but have you ever thought of disappearing for a couple of hours just to see if anyone would come looking for you? Have you ever had the thought of getting yourself hurt just to say that it happened? To see if people actually cared? That maybe they’d hold you a little tighter?

You would never do it, but I wonder if the thought ever consumed your mind at all?

Your father. You hate him. You loved him. Would want him back? Would you be happy to see him again? Or would you hate it especially if he does come back and everyone suddenly started acting as if he never left at all? Would you resent Kit for idolizing him and looking up to him once more? As if the hole he left was never there at all. Like the years you spent trying to fill and fix that hurt, to be the man he could never be in your eyes was all for nothing. That the childhood you sacrificed trying to fix things with your mum and sister, meant nothing at all.

Your sister your twin. Have you ever felt resentful and jealous of her? Because she complains about everything but at least your mother pays attention to her. Or do you feel guilty instead? Cuz she’s shackled into place by the duties of being the Sorsha’s heir and you’re free as a bird.

Then you got kidnapped and everything in your being says run the moment you realise who Lili was. You run and you run but the sun and the ruined city is all there is and you just wanted absolutely anything else and Lili says you are important here. You gave in out of desperation but that was some fucked up shit cuz the crone made you fight your sister. made you almost betray your family and kingdom and that makes you feel like absolute shit.

You feel weak and stupid but then you realise.... Kit came for you. She crossed the Shattered Sea to rescue you. She came to save you.

Boy that must’ve felt amazing despite all the shit that happened. Cuz you don’t know how long you were in that city but I’ve wondered if you spent your time there wondering if anybody would ever come for you. If anyone would ever care to come save you. So when Kit came and said all of those things and really properly saved you, I wondered how that must’ve felt for you.

I know you must feel tainted. Cuz of the crone of course but also cuz you hate feeling all these negative emotions about your family.

But Buddy let me tell you this.. you are a good man. And despite all those feelings you love and you love and you love and you love and you care and you care so fucking deeply that it hurts. And wanting that same love be given to you is completely normal.

And maybe love is fickle and easily manipulated. But you love Kit more than you could ever resent her. You love your mum more than she could ever dismiss you. You love your kingdom more than anything the wyrm could ever offer to you. Your love is good. And you are good.

My boy never let go of that love. Cuz if there’s anything more powerful than wyrm in this world. It’s love.

[mowsyling]

Willow season finale some thoughts &stuff

Ermahgerd!!! The end... 👀👀👀😱😄

But first things first... I was so frickin scared going into this. I had a crappy first half of the day and when I got around to having time to watch I hesitated, afraid I'd be disappointed again &turning a crappy into a horrible day... I wasn't.. it didn't.. 😅

Anyway, some scenes and thoughts..

Sibling & "lovers" reunion scene was delightfully awkward &weird.. Wtf Airk? Acting like nothing is wrong.. He guys great you made it!🥴

The cliff scene with the rest of the gang went pretty much exactly as I expected, including Willow not jumping at first.

Meeting unexpectedly hot Crone.. Also not far from what I thought would happen.. I was pretty sure they'd end up caught in an illusion type thing. I had even had considered a wedding scenario once, still surprised that actually happened. A surprise was Madmartigan's involvement.. Hadn't considered that! (It makes me think it really was his voice Kit heard in the treasury in the mines.) Anyway..

This...😆

I cheered!! 😄😂🙌

(There's someone far better suited.. he just needs to get through his corruption arc first.. *coughs* I'm getting ahead of myself..)

Of course Willow turns up on time to save the day, shatter the illusion &de-petrify everyone.. fighting ensues..

This was funny... 😆

👆This was hilarious to me😆😂 I want it on a shirt! 😂

This scene was... oof..

My poor foolishly brave baby boy!!🥺🥺😭 I had such a hard time getting through this🫣.. hit pause to collect myself.. I knew he was gonna "die" just didn't know how ded hed get.. When she poofed him through the passage l was very uncertain.. torn between "she literally shredded him - there were pieces!😳 and "but he went though the passage so there's a chance..?" Ooof..

I made it through.. and on the battle went.. Wand broken but Elora now fired up & lo & behold! Shooting lightning from her hands!😅

I was so tense through all this, still worried about Graydon's fate.. I knew everyone else was gonna be fine..

Important realisations &decisions (Boorman)

Then.. I cackled so hard when this happened! They really went there! 😆

(Monster fuckers unite!😂😆)

Kit's face!🤌😆😂😂 The personification of "Eww"...

Croneified Harbinger Airk.. Evil is really not great for your skin it seems.. Do not recommend..

Jade finally activates the cuirass for Kit... I have to say I absolutely love the design of that armour! Gimme!😍

I had considered Willow deliberately breaking his staff but my guess had been the crystal might be needed for the Lux instead it was used as detox or anthelmintic I guess you could say😆😅 for Airk.. kinda..

Boorman.. I feel you..

This is when I finally shed some tears... 🥺😭😭

I was almost convinced at this point Gray was gone for good.. was mentally preparing myself to be very sad disappointed 😅

But..

BUT!!!

I shrieked! I was so happy! Idc that he's in Wyrm-land with (fake) Dark!Elora.. He's alive! (-ish?) The relief!😅😅😄😭

Man bun Graydon has rights!

Dark!Elora is hot!

(can't blame Graydon if he's gonna fall for that for a bit..😆)

(This looks exactly like the Battlefield from Willow's vision btw.. (sadly reached the picture limit😆)

So I guess Graydon might have a corruption arc next season... And it looks like they planned for three seasons!

That's it.. not super detailed just what hit me most..

Not all hope is lost for Graylora nation! 😄😅🙌

💜

[lowkeyed1]

11, 15, 22, 28

Velvet Fist, Iron Glove

or the full Q&A if you want 😉

ooh... thanks for the ask <3 Velvet Fist, Iron Glove is my take on a Willow 2022 AU where the Gales never came the night before the wedding and Kit and Graydon had to go through with it... but the secret Graydon is harboring is a little different, too: he's a trans man. It evolved from exploring Kit and Graydon finding they had more in common than they thought and developing a relationship to involving Jade... and Boorman... and Airk now as well. It's a WIP, so I'm not done growing the Greater Tir Asleen Polycule yet! Not to mention it's developed something of a plot involving Zivian's evil doings and machinations, a kidnapping, the Elora Danan reveal, all kinds of fun stuff... 11. What was the most challenging aspect of writing it? I think the biggest challenge is similar to polyamory in real life! It's hard to have so many relationships going on and give them all the time and depth they deserve. Plus since I'm jumping POV a lot I really have to delve into the feelings of each person about everything that's going on and make sure it all feels grounded and true to them and the situations. 15. Talk about the characters’ struggles & how you decided on those. Hm. Well, for Kit I felt like her struggle to be seen and heard for herself was similar to Graydon's. It seemed to me that if they had a chance to get to know each other, they would realize that and be mutually supportive, and grow together. Onward from that, it seemed to me that Kit's desire to be in control and be seen as valuable would lead to her discovering a predilection for domming; meanwhile given Graydon's more constrained mien in his family he would find some relief in letting go of control. Of course, things evolve... as Kit begins to feel safer and more secure she finds she can give up a little control, and as Graydon sees that need in her he can take control at times because he sees how much she needs a break. Kit still tends to struggle in areas where she can't control things and that manifests in moods and outbursts. Graydon struggles with his father's machinations and his own ever-present horniness, lol. I can't say I really consciously decided on most of that, it just felt like it came organically as a result of studying their canonical characterization. I'm operating on vibes here, baby! 22. What is something you learned about yourself as a writer from the experience? Hoo boy. You would ask that one, lol. What have I learned from writing a vast pornographic romp about domination, submission, coercion, humiliation, and edging? ....Things. We shall say I have learned things about myself for sure, lol. I also learned that even if I don't really know where the plot is going, if I start writing something will happen anyway and it's usually fine. It's given me more confidence to just pick a direction and go -- usually what hangs me up is having too many choices and possibilities and knowing when I pick one that limits or cuts off the rest. But I can always write another story with the path not taken :) 28. Write a new summary for the fic, but badly. "Graydon Does Tir Asleen: You Won't Believe The Things That Make This Boy Horny" I really need to get back to writing this one... Now that I've talked about it I miss it T_T I don't think I'm gonna do the whole QnA but bonus: 19. While editing, did you kill any darlings? What were they? My first take on the scene where Graydon admits he's attracted to Boorman really cracked me up, but it didn't fit with how I eventually decided it should go. I've always been a little sad it had to be cut so I'm delighted to share it now: -----

"Kit. I'm in trouble. I think I have a crush on Thraxus." "....Your squire?" she looked at him, her eyebrows raised. He stopped, completely thrown off his next sentence. "Yes, my squire. Are there a lot of guys named Thraxus in Tir Asleen? Because I had the impression it was an uncommon name." "No, no... he's the only one. It's just..." "What?" "Well, when you said you liked boys I thought you meant, you know. Boys like you." "...I don't think there are a lot of boys like me in Tir Asleen, either." "No, idiot. I mean, like... softer boys."

[lowkeyed1]

WIP Weds

thank you for the tag, @queen-of-meows! one of the things i'm working on today is a future chapter of velvet fist, iron glove! i've been focused on what's been going on with the boys, the last few chapters -- now it's time to check in with kit and boorman, back in tir asleen: -----

Kit paced from one end of her room to the other, her dressing gown flying out behind her. Half a day to do a divination spell, so they couldn’t even set out until tomorrow? Was sorcery usually this slow or was this guy just bad at it? And this Elora Danan revelation on top of everything else? It was too much. She’d thought maybe her father was somewhere keeping the future empress safe and all this time the chosen one was baking muffins right under her nose, not to mention making out with her brother? If her mother wasn’t there to confirm it, she’d just refuse to believe it. And what happened to her father, then? All of this, on top of Airk and Graydon missing, probably subject to some dark plan of Graydon’s father, her utter helplessness to do anything about it, it was too much. One more thing and she’d snap. A knock sounded at the door and she stomped over, ready to unleash her fury on whoever happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. She flung open the door. Boorman stood there, also in his pajamas and dressing gown, holding a bottle and two glasses. Kit opened her mouth to yell at the last person she wanted to see right now, but his expression gave her pause. He looked worried, and sad. She shut her mouth again. “Peace offering?” he said, holding up the bottle. She frowned. “I’m sorry, I know you hate me. But I don’t have anyone I can talk to about all of this.” He looked at her hopefully. She stared up into his big sad eyes and felt a little sorry for him, despite herself. “Fine,” she huffed, and stalked back into the room. “That better be good shit, though.” ----- tagging @bisexualshakespeare @rotaryshakes @peterbenjaminparkour