#running just makes me angrier because it fucking. blows
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Has anyone figured out what to do with the undying rage that lives just beneath the surface? Like the fury that you constantly need to be pushing down because you know unleashing it onto others is cruel? But if you never let it out the build up causes you to explode on some unsuspecting bystander?
#after years of therapy Iâve learned Iâm a very angry person#I used to just be sad all the time but now Iâm just#so angry#I feel wronged so easily and I hate being mean so I try to never let people see how angry I am#but eventually I just blow up at someone for a relatively minor offense#like whatâs a healthy way to get it out of your system?#and donât say working out#running just makes me angrier because it fucking. blows#is it art? should I be making angry and viable art?#journaling?#people always talk about how to deal with the sad part of mental illnesses but like#what about the true bitches and bastards of the world#what do we have to do to cope?
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A different kind of Valentine
Summary: Your fiancĂŠ breaks your heart on Valentineâs Day out of all days.
Pairing: former!(any male character) x fem!Reader, Mafia!Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader
Warnings: angst, break-up, mentions/implied cheating, making out with a stranger, language, drinking, tipsy reader, a little fluff
Promises shouldnât be broken.
Promises are meant to be kept. Right?
Love should be strong and unbreakable. If you swear to someone that you love and adore them, you cannot take it back so easily.
How could your fiancĂŠ take the words he whispered lovingly not months ago back?
âI canât do this anymore,â he replied coolly when you asked why his suitcases were standing in the hallways. You believed he must go on yet another business trip.
That he wants to leave you never crossed your mind.
How foolish of you to believe that he wants to stay and keep his promises.
Shell-shocked you watched him grab your hand to slide his grandmotherâs ring off of your finger.
You couldnât think, speak, or even whimper. All you saw was the man you loved turn his back on you.
He stuffed the ring into his pocket, murmuring someone elseâs name under his breath. You knew the name. Once in a while, he mentioned his assistant.
Of course, he had to turn your breakup into a clichĂŠ. He had to bang his secretary and leave you for a younger model.
If not for the tears running down your face, and the heaviness in your heart, youâd laugh at the fucked-up situation. It felt like you ended up in a bad rom-com slash comedy movie. The only difference was people werenât laughing at the bad joke your life turned into.
âYou canât be serious,â oh, you finally found your voice. âWhy are you doing this? Did you get bored? Is it the wedding? We couldâve talked things out.â
âThatâs not it.â He grunted in your direction.
âIs she prettier? Better in bed,â you got angrier and louder. âDoes she like it up her ass? Is it that?â You threw the next best things at him, making a scene. âWhat is it? Huh? Is her cunt squeezing your tighter?â
âYouâre just not it!â He bit back and threw his hands up in surrender. âCan you not do this right now? How about you donât throw a tantrum? People break up all the time!â
âFive years and thatâs all I get?â You yelled. âI deserve better than a lame excuse! I want to know what happened to us!â
âI love her because I donât love you anymore!â He yelled back, making you flinch at his outburst. âItâs not only that the sex is better. Sheâs all I ever wanted in a woman. You got too comfortable and want to cuddle on the sofa instead of going out and blowing me off behind a bar.â
âWhat?â You huffed. âI was the one trying to drag you off the couch! You only ever went out with your buddies.â He ignored your tears, and that your voice cracked. âI guess this never mattered. You had to fulfill the clichĂŠ. So, go ahead. We will see if she can make you happy.â
You stormed toward the door, blindly grabbing your keys and phone. It was impossible to stand there, staring at the gifts you placed on the coffee table in the living room.
âIf you are still here when I come back, Iâll stab you right in the face,â you looked over your shoulder at the man who used to be your moon and stars. âIf you touch my shit, you are a dead man. I will find you and your whore and turn you into dog food.â
âAnother one,â you slammed the glass down onto the bar counter. âMake it a double.â You placed fifty bucks onto the empty glass. âNo, give me the bottle. I think Iâll drink it at home.â
âWe donât sell the bottle for you to take it home,â the bartender gruffly replied.
âAre you fucking kidding me?â You glared at the burly guy. âI can drink the whole bottle at the bar, but I canât pay for it and take it home?â Quirking a brow, you look at the man.
âHouse rules.â
âFuck this,â you grabbed the fifty bucks and stuffed the money into your bra. âIâll get more at the next liquor store. Fuck you, and all of you.â
âAll of us?â The bartender asked with amusement.
Storming out of the bar you huffed again. âFuck Valentineâs Day.â You muttered and walked away, almost running a guy over.
You glared at him and bared your teeth.
âAssholes with a ding-dong between their legs. You are all the same. Useless and worthlessâŚâ
âHey, watch your step, doll,â the guy snickered when you threw your clutch at him. âOuch, what do you think you are doing?â The man caught your clutch just in time.
âFuck you too!â You poked two fingers into his chest. âYou are no better than the bartender and my lovely fiancĂŠ. All of you are useless and have a limp dick. No man is worth my time.â
You snatched the clutch out of the manâs hands. âLanguage, lady,â he said, his voice now dangerously low. âIf you donât watch your tongue, someone might teach you some manners.â
âOh, and you are that kind of man,â you slapped him across the face with your clutch. âWho do you think you are?â Usually, you wouldnât attack a stranger in the dead of the night, but you were a little tipsy, and still mad because of the events of the day. âThreatening a woman.â
âSweet cheeks,â he said while rubbing his face. It was still red from the slap, and he considered his next step. âI wouldnât dare to raise my hand against you.â The man stepped closer to grab your clutch. âI saidââ He grabbed you by your throat and slammed you against the wall, âIâll teach you a lesson.â
âIâll scream,â you began to race. Maybe you messed with the wrong guy. âGet off me.â
âYeah, you will scream,â he smirked darkly and leaned closer to whisper in your ear. âIâll make you scream my name, doll. So, what will it be? Do you want me to make you scream, or do you want me to make you whimper my name?â
âThatâs not a choice!â You complained. âI have had enough of selfish men believing they can toy with me and my heart. Iâll cut yours out if you dare to touch me.â
âA cocky one,â he dropped his hand from your throat and pressed his hand against the wall, right next to your head. âTell me, doll. Who hurt such a sweet girl?â He looked you up and down, hungrily roaming your body with his eyes.
âHeââ You looked away and blinked a few times. âYouâre not my therapist, and Iâm not your problem.â
âYou made it my problem when you attacked me because a douchebag hurt you. So, again. Who hurt you, doll?â
God, he smelled so good, and his lips tenderly pressed against your earlobe. You didnât know what got into you, but you grasped for the stranger, taking him by supposed when you pressed your lips to his.
His hands grabbed your face, gently cradling it while he allowed you to dominate the kiss. âDoll,â he murmured against your lips. âYouâre a little drunk, huh?â
âMake me forget about him,â you pleaded and fisted his jacket. âHere and now. Come on. Donât be all talk.â
âIâd love to make you scream my name.â He pecked your lips twice. âI love me a crazy girl hitting me at first sight but, I wonât take advantage of you. Youâre hurt, drunk, and a little lost. Let me take you home.â
âI donât even know your name,â you gasped and stepped back. âI just kissed a stranger and asked him to fuck me. Whatâs wrong with me?â
âNothing is wrong with you, doll,â his features softened. âItâs alright. Iâm a nice guy.â He smirked and laughed as you stepped back again. âMy name is Bucky, okay. Iâll take you home if you want me to. Or I could call a cab for you.â
âY/N,â you murmured your name, embarrassed about your actions. âSorry. I didnât want to attack youâŚor kiss youâŚor ask you to fuck me.â
âY/N,â Bucky hummed. âA very nice name.â He said. âFor an even nicer woman.â Holding out his hand Bucky waited for you to take it. âI wonât bite, promised.â
âMaybe I like it when you bite me,â you challenged him.
âLetâs stick to getting the alcohol out of your system,â Bucky wrapped his arm around your shoulders when you didnât take his hand. âDoll, you shouldnât stay here. We started on the wrong foot, but Iâm not a bad guy.â
âWhat the shit!â You exclaimed loudly while you looked around your apartment. âThat bastard had the guts to unpack the gifts I got him before leaving our home to bang that bitch.â
âHmmâŚthat him?â Bucky lifted one of your picture frames. âHe looks like a douchebag. I was right.â
âWhy did you come with me again?â You glanced over your shoulder at the stranger in your home. âIâm good. Really.â
âI wonât leave a pretty dame in need alone on Valentineâs Day,â Bucky said. âNot after that man left you for some other woman.â
âIâm fine,â you lied. âJustâŚmad.â You shrugged. âI had the whole day planned; you know. Dinner at our favorite restaurant, the perfect gift, and naughty underwear toâŚâ You shook your head.
âHis loss,â Bucky shrugged while looking at one of the gift bags on the table. âIt shouldâve been him making big plans for Valentineâs Day. If you love your lady, you spoil her.â
âHe found someone prettier and sexier,â you sniffled. âHe told me so. The man I loved fell in love with his secretary because he doesnât love me anymore.â
âAgain, his loss,â he stepped closer to look inside the gift bag, taking the lingerie out. âRed lace, huh?â
âHe liked redâŚâ You snatched the underwear out of Buckyâs hands. âI wanted to turn him on. Itâs been a while since he was interested in doing more than sleep in our bedroom.â
âIâd say white suits you more,â Bucky threw the lingerie over his shoulder. âHow about you change into your favorite outfit, and I invite you for dinner. No strings attached, doll.â
âYou want to take me out?â You questioned.
âPlease let me take you out,â he stepped closer to grab your hand. âYou deserve to spend this day with someone who cares.â
âYou donât even know me.â
âYet,â he said. âLet me get to know you, please.â
You nodded and agreed to go out for dinner with Bucky. It was a risk, but one you were willing to take.
Valentine reloaded
Tags in reblog.
#bucky barnes#mafia au#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes x female reader#A different kind of Valentine
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AND TELL ME WE WEREN'T JUST FRIENDS
THIS DOESN'T MAKE MUCH SENSE...
"Friends." â "Is that clear?"
"Crystal clear."
The cool air of night felt burning on your skin, the anger you held spilling over the brim. You couldn't believe you were having this conversation with Billie right now. You swear you saw things clearly. You know you read the signs correctly.
"Friends, that's all we are, Y/N." She breathes, never even sparing you a glance as she shifts her weight onto one foot and then the other. She couldn't bear looking at you, "Jus' wanted to clarify sinceâ"
"Since it got a little too far and you said you loved me?" You scoff, squeezing your hands into fists and then releasing them. Every word that came out of her mouth since you got outside made you even angrier, "Yeah, okay, whatever you say."
Billie parts her lips to speak, but all that comes out is a small squeak of sadness or maybe anger? You couldn't even pinpoint it anymore. You didn't even know her. She felt like a completely different person. Like a stranger.
You barely knew the person you stood just a few feet away from. And, sure, you should've known when this whole "friends with benefits" situation began, but it just hit you hard each time she reminded you of it.
She's reminded you of your boundaries countless times before. Neither of you knew why you lashed out this time. Maybe you did. Maybe you were just tired. You were tired of not being able to kiss her publicly. You were tired of only being able to hold her hand behind closed doors. You were so fucking tired of not being able to call her yours.
"StopâFuckâJust stop, Y/N." She groans, inhaling sharply as she runs a hand through her hair. It was just as stressful for her as it was for you, but you didn't know that. You didn't know a lot of things about her.
Her eyes meet yours for a split second, but she just can't do it. She can't look at you and speak because if she does, she knows she'll spill her true feelings. And she can't do that. She can't. She can't. She can't.
"Stop what? You're acting like I'm crazy, Billie!" You all but yell, eyes wild and hair blowing in your face from the windy night. It feels like a scene from a movie. You wished it was because there would've been a happy ending.
"Because you are!" She yells, her eyes snapping to yours quicker than you can even process. You let out a short breath as she speaks, tears brimming in her eyes, "You are fucking insane thinking, for even a second, that I ever had actual interest in you!"
Push her away.
Push her so fucking far away she won't ever come back.
"God, you're crazy, Y/N!" She scoffs, a fake smile on her face as she tilts her head, "Haven't you seen the signs?" But the signs weren't of hatred. They were signs of actual love. She was contradicting herself just to push you away.
She had to push you away. She wasn't good for you. Her reputation was too much. She didn't want to hurt you. You'd leave her in the end, anyway. It was better she hurt you than millions of people on the internet. Right?
"Friends." She states, her voice shaky despite her efforts to stay strong, "Is that clear?" Her eyes move away from you again, and your heart breaks just that little bit more.
Tears streak down your cheeks as you sniffle. You just wanted the floor to open and swallow you whole. Embarrassment, sadness, angerâGodâEvery emotion ran through you. What were you supposed to say?
"Crystal clear." You utter, voice small and weak. Your knees felt like they would give out any second now, the ache in your chest hurting more than it should've.
It felt like the entire world was watching the situation unfold, but in reality, it was only Billie. But what was the difference, really? She was your entire world. She was. Was.
@mseilishmwah @sophloveswomen @mxqdii @livialifesblog @devynscomet @her-favorite @br4ttyeilish @wiidfi0wer33 @loving1dsworld @tan1shere @fallingforfalll2 @cierraonline @dandelions4us @scarlittt @ifwdominicfike @hrtsdollie
#billie eilish#billie ellish lyrics#billie eilish imagine#billie eilish songs#billie eilish icons#billie eilish fanfiction#billie eilish smut#billie eilish x fem!reader#billie eilish x reader#billie eilish x you#billie eilish blurb#billie eilish fanfic#billie eilish x reader smut#billie eilish x y/n#billie eilish oneshot#billie eilish angst#billie eilish fluff#billie eilish fic#๨ billie post ŕ§
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Hi I read your mean friend fic and Iâm in love with it! Do u think u can do one with crybaby!reader and Mattheo where he is mad because something happened at work and he blows up on her but she was extra sensitive that day, but it dosent catch his attention til later and it ends with fluff! Sorry for making the request so long anyway have a good dayâ¤ď¸!
Extra sensitive~ mattheo riddle
â10% or nothing. Take it or leave it.â Mattheo said sternly into the phone. If thereâs one thing about him, itâs that he absolutely hated people that went against his demands.
âThis is ridiculous! I worked day and night just for a lousy ten percent-â the man began rambling before mattheo irritably hung up the phone.
He sighed before looking down at his watch. 9:30pm. He stood up from his desk and collected his coat along with his keys and wallet.
He walked out the building swearing underneath his breath till he reached the car. He started the engine before slamming the door with enough force to make the car jolt.
A few minutes later he was met with a packed freeway due to many cars trying to get home for the holidays. âJesus fucking Christâ he cursed trying to maintain his temper.
He finally made it home much to your excitement, as you came running down the stairs. âMattheo your back! Look!â You exclaimed pointing towards the sink.
You turned the knob back and forth with a grin on your face. âMe and Theodore fixed it when you were at work!â You said with a proud smile. Before mattheo left the sink was not running as much water as it was usually, so you decided to ask Theodore to help you fix it before he comes home .
You only thought of it as a sweet gesture but mattheo didnât. You being a bit oblivious to the light hearted compliments Theodore gave you made mattheo absolutely crazy. âSo he was here? With you? Alone?â He asked you with a glare.
You let out a giggle with a confused head tilt. âI mean yeah you were at work, why?â You asked softly as your smile slowly vanished when you noticed his facial expressions turn angrier.
âWhy? Because he fucking likes you y/n!â He exclaimed making your eyes widen. âNo he doesnât! He was just being niceâ you tried to defend the boy making mattheo groan.
âYouâve got to be fucking kidding me y/n, you really donât think that he likes you? The kisses on the cheek, the hugs around your waist, and i have to come home to you telling me that youâve been home alone with him?!â
âI didnât know, Iâm sorryâ you said cowering behind the counter. He scoffed once again. âOf course you didnât know, your too stupid to figure anything outâ he spat as a few tears began flooding down your cheeks.
You whimpered before quickly walking out of the kitchen. He sighed running his fingers through his hair as the guilt began to seep in.
<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>
âBunny?â He called out for you in a soft tone. âGo âway!â You said through your quiet sobs as you constantly wiped tears off your face.
âCmon out for me bunny please?â He asked you softly slowly peeling the fluffy pink blanket off your huddled figure.
âYour so mean sometimesâ you mumbled looking away from him. âI know baby mâ sorry mkay?â He apologized before stroking your cheek as gently as someone would touch a ancient statue.
You loved how he cared for you even in bad moments like these. You couldnât help but lean into his large comforting hand.
He placed a kiss on top of your head before pulling you into his lap despite all your squirming and whining, strong arms bound tight around you as he presses a succession of kisses to your neck and face.
â âu forgive me now princess?â He cooed at you making you huff in defeat. You curled into his lap hiding your face in his chest before nodding with a whimper.
âHow âbout tomorrow we make some of those little paper snowflakes that you love so much since I was such a meanie today hm?â He suggested causing you to perk up.
âCan we make Christmas cards too?â You said looking up into his eyes. He sighed playfully before nodding and gliding his hand over your hair making you hum in content.
đđ¨đ đŠđŤđ¨đ¨đđŤđđđ<3
#crybaby reader#crybaby!reader#mattheo riddle fanfiction#mattheo riddle x you#mattheo riddle#mattheo riddle x reader#mattheo riddle fluff#mattheo riddle imagine
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A popular fandom headcanon is that if someone calls Dick, Tim, or Jason âRobinâ in a time of stress they would listen. There was actually a scene with that in a Nightwing annual.ďżź
Would this work with WMLP Dick? I imagine heâd be super pissed if someone tried it regardless if it worked or not.
Man the idea of Bruce yelling â Robin Stand Down!â At Dick
ooooooooh I had some delicious thoughts about this. And most of them are spoilery.
For the most part the only thing that'd do is make Dick angrier because jesus fucking christ are you joking? you think you can start calling me that and I'll keel over like a fucking dog? I'm not a child. how dare you come in here and talk about Robin, as if you didn't leave him for dead.
But.
that being said.
Something happening where the league is working with Deathstroke. And they get to the end of the mission and everything had been tense and difficult but otherwise fine. And some guy makes a comment. Someone who's got some power or whatever and saw Renegade and Deatshtroke together. and they've lost the battle so as a last minute gesture they're like "of course Deathstroke's dog can't do the job himself, has to run to the next authority to order him around like the little bitch he is. After all the work he put into you you're just his little slut-"
And Dick has shot him in the jaw before he can even really finish the sentence. and he's tearing through people again to get to this man, who's still alive but has half his face blow off, so that he can beat the shit out of him, and the leaguers are too far away, busy handling something else as they begin arrests. It's not till he's standing over the man, gun leveled on him, that Bruce finally gets close enough and yells "Robin no!"
And Dick pauses.
and everything goes still for a moment as quiet cold rage seeps into the air.
and he looks up at Batman. Batman, who he has ignored this whole time. Batman, who he never attempts to be in the same room as. Batman, who he has refused to deign with his gaze-
"Now you have my attention," and his voice is cold as it seeps out of a voice altering device. he cocks his head, "and yet still no authority."
and fires.
he puts his gun away, not bothering to come any step closer to Bruce, who is horrified. Because not only has Dick killed a man in front of him, but he's done so with the knowledge that Bruce knows it's him and he still does not care.
"when did you figure it out?"
"there were too many coincidences." which Bruce had always said he could never accept too many coincidences. one can be overlooked and two can be humorous, but any more was worth suspicion. "Slade went out of his way to kill specifically you, and then took on an apprentice afterwards who could have been your age. You seem acquainted with Artemis, who would otherwise never dare speak to Deathstroke and those affiliated with him. You took in the speedster who attacked Central city..." and other such things perhaps Bruce has learned in this hypothetical scenario.
"and you waited till now..." Dick says, "when you thought it would make me do as I was told."
"Robin-"
"say it again." and his hand is back on his gun, "one more time, see what I do about it. I have very little patience left for you."
mmmmmmm delicious.
#dc comics#fanfiction#dick grayson#with morality like a polynomial#wmlp#angst#deathstroke#Batman#Bruce Wayne
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Okay okay the ratchet first fp au was equally heartrending but also perfect and thank you so much for going into so much detail to expound on my silly little fantasy, I love it! But if you donât mind, Iâm gonna poke you with one more question thatâs bugged me ever since MC woke up and ratch op and bee had to catch her up on the last 30 years: they mentioned unicron and Optimusâ amnesia (which is another au youâre portraying marvelously well btw! I love shiny and new to pieces!), as well as a couple of the other tfp eps, but I donât recall them mentioning synth-en? Like, at all? (Unless I totally missed it?) Between ratchetâs problems and opâs withdrawal, I figured that the tension between them like the scene where they fight and ratchet accuses op of being too soft to take out megatron and thatâs why they lost cliff jumper, combined with MCâs unconsciousness, opâs guilt about it, and ratchetâs (partial?) blame for op putting her in that condition to start with and envy knowing he wouldâve had more restraint and cared for her more in his mind (and them both missing her terribly and being lost without her), would kind of cause a boiling point between them? (Fun fact if you didnât know it but the tfp writers had tossed around the idea of ratchet blaming op for elita oneâs death instead of cliffjumper, but they had the Orion pax arc coming up and they didnât want to add anymore characters or smth so they nixed it) So if ratchet spews about mc (and elita??) to op, does op snap too in this case? Do they actually come to blows? Does op even get mad and rise to the bait or does it just break his heart bc now ratchet is turning on him too and pointing out every mistake heâs made and ratchets never been that mean to him before and wouldnât dream of saying any of it under normal circumstances but is so hyped up he no longer has a filter? I am reeling here at the possibilities! I am so fricken curious bc your unique individual characterizations of them as well as their mutual adoration for mc would give so many delicious untapped layers to that episode - and again you donât have to answer this at all but I would love to hear your thoughts! :) thank you so much for your time!
(dude I'm so sorry it took me so long to respond to this AND that it's nowhere near as long as that other ask)
A : anon thank you for the praise about everything esp. shiny n new like goddamn I love that little thing so much, B : I had no idea about Elita in TFP until you mentioned that and I'm very glad they left that out bc I would absolutely have not fucking survived that my heart's in pieces just from reading that, and C :
I think they would have started fighting. As in, Ratchet, with 0 filter, would start laying it out how mad he is about what happened to you. He would blame it on Optimus, and at the time, he would feel totally justified in saying it.
-Optimus would be barely able to hold back his rage, but manages to restrain himself. Tells Ratchet he needs to go home, let that crap work through his system, and recharge before talking to him again.
-Ratchet would then suggest Optimus frag him because that tends to knock people unconscious for indefinite periods of time.
-Optimus looses it. Lunges for him, grabs him and fucking throttles him.
-And the second his servos wrap around his throat, freezes. Because he touched someone. He touched someone he cared about, and he did it with the intent to hurt them.
-He goes catatonic.
-Ratchet, slightly sobered, has to pry his servos off of him, digit by digit.
-Once he does, he leaves in a huff, runs off to punch Megatron in the face like he originally intended.
-But not before ducking out of sight and having the quickest, filthiest guilty-wank of his life. Doesnât matter how mad you are. Angrier-than-god-Optimus touching you will make you cream your jeans, and marching through deception territory with a spontaneous overload looming on the horizon probably isnât a great strategy.
-Once he gets the shit kicked out of him and finally sobers up, and realizes that entire exchange not only happened, but happened in front of Bumblebee, he decides this was, in fact, the second worst thing heâs ever fucking done. He calculates the damage done to his filters, finds that the synth-en was mostly processed by other organs, chugs the rough hi-grade equivalent of 2 handles of bourbon, and blacks out for 72 hours straight.
-Neither of them ever speak about it again.
-To each other.
-They both tell you at different times after youâve woken up
-shock, sadness, understanding, and reason no# 234382643 for feeling guilty about coma time.jpg.
-you bring it up to Bee eventually after a loooooong-ass time.
-Heâs just like âwow that sucked but I figured it was par for the course having two(2) reincarnated gods and the universeâs most overpowered 3rd wheel as a family.â
-Thank you for putting things into perspective Baybee boy.
-Reader eventually relays this to both of them.
-Everyone feels marginally less shitty.
#fp#optimus/reader#optimus/ratchet#OPtimus/Ratchet/Reader#youfic#2nd person pov#these asks are so fucking fun fam I can't even#got to check off all three of the mature labels this time fam
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the sex to try to conceive would be so terribly tragic itâs making me tear up just thinking about it đ mikasa so clingy and weepy because itâs the only time where sheâs able to allow herself emotional release vs eren whoâs doing everything he can to please her to give her what she wants anything to make her happy after the shit he pulled.
yeah fuck, itâs just tears all around. i think eren would blow his fuse sooner rather than later bc he knows itâs only hurting her more. he wants to make her happy but heâs also so madâ mad at himself and mad at her for being this way, like an open, smarting wound that keeps getting bruised over and over again. he has no place to say it after what he did but, â⌠why are you doing this?â
Vacant eyes look back at him. The lack of emotion in them only made him angrier. âJust tell me whatâs on your mind, Mikasa. Call me names. Tell me Iâm the worst person in the world.â His voice cracks. âJust donât⌠do this. It feels like youâre slipping away from me, and I canât bear it.â
Maybe sheâd leave the house, turning away from Eren because she couldnât bear it either. Eren always expects so much from her, expects her to tell him her feelings, expects her to do things his wayâ but thatâs not who she is. But who is she? Of late, sheâs been trying so hard to hold herself together, she hasnât realised that the cracks that started that awful day had spread like vines across her entire being, threatening to split her into so many tiny pieces⌠like dust, like nothing.
And when the first sob rips through her throat, when sheâs already out the door, gripping the railing that protected her from falling out to sea, she feels herself crumbling, the person she tried to protect disintegrating to the ground.
Eventually she goes back; She walks in to find Eren pacing holes in their hardwood floor. A frenzy in his green eyes that ebbs when he finally sees her. âMikasa,â he says. Eren always managed to say so much when he said her name. Concern, anger, fear, perhaps. It feels like home.
But for the first time ever, free of the pieces of herself and the glue that sheâd poured over it, she recognises that even if it feels like home, itâs a home that no longer feels safe to her, drenched in ugly feelings of mistrust and lack of self-worth, and it all came from him. The man sheâd loved her entire life.
Eren is conflictedâ he doesnât know whether to run to her and crush her in his arms, or to give her space bc she obviously needs it, so he does an awkward thing where he reaches out for her hand, cold from the wind.
âWhen you left, Iââ
âI felt free.â Her voice sounds foreign in the room. Like honesty that had not echoed in those halls for so long.
His fingers slip out of hers. There are storms in his eyes, words heavy on his tongue. But maybe Mikasa will say more. Maybe she will finally say something.
âYou want me to tell you whatâs on my mind?â
He nods.
âIf l slept with another man, what would be on your mind, Eren?â
Itâs not something easy to imagine, the conjured sight makes him feel sick to his stomach.
âIs that what this is then, you want some kind of revenge?â
Mikasa laughs. A frustrated, broken, empty sound. âI feel like you donât even know me anymore.â
âMaybe I donât, Mikasa,â Eren says desperately. âIâm not a mind reader. You feel so distant from me. You look my Mikasa and you feel like my Mikasa, but I donât know who you are anymore, because you wonât tell me. You wonât let me inside anymore, and maybe thatâs my own fault.â
His lips are worn and bitten but he continues. âI fucked up, and I donât deserve another chance. I donât deserve to know you anymore, I donât deserve that privilege. But you wonât even tell me that, andâ â
His voice cracks with emotion. âI want to fix this so bad, I want to be good to you, Mikasa. But I donât know how. And you wonât tell me. And Iâm sorry, Iâm sorry, Iâm so fucking sorry, I put you in this position and I keep asking for more, but please if you still want me, please let me in.â
âThere was a time,â he grins weakly, âwhen youâd have whacked me on the head for being an idiot, and told me how to do things right. Dâyou remember that, Mikasa?â
âI should have grown up by now, but maybe I havenât. Maybe thatâs all your husband is; an overgrown child, but please tell me how to make it right. Because I need you.â
Mikasaâs eyes are heavy with unshed tears. âYou always do this,â she says shakily. âYou have so many feelings. So many needs.â Then quieter, âI feel like thereâs no space for mine.â
âIâll make space for it,â he says fiercely. He points his finger to his chest, not caring if it looks silly. âThereâs so much space in here, and I will treasure them, I swear. If you let me. Please, Mikasa, you have to let me.â
And after fighting what looks like a war inside of herself, she comes to him. Places her head on his chest and lets him wrap his arms around her, and listens to the quickness of his heartbeat as he promises her heâll take care of her.
âI thought about leaving, you know,â she says softly, into his shirt. It was wet from her tears. She can feel him stiffen. But he doesnât loosen his hold around her
He tries to sound measured when he asks, âWhy didnât you?â
âDonât you want to know why I wanted to leave?â
He holds his tongue, makes space for her feelings. Kills his assumptions. âTell me.â Tell me everything.
âBecause I couldnât bear to stay in a place that kept reminding me I wasnât enough for you.â
âMikasaâ â
âYou sought someone else out and brought her to our bed, Eren.â And despite herself, another fat tear rolls down her cheek. âYou fucked her to feel better, maybe? Doesnât matter, I wasnât enough.â
He hates hearing these words from her, they twist inside of him like a knife, but he doesnât stop her. Because he promised. âBut I didnât leave. Because I wasnât enough.â
âWasnât enough to be yours, wasnât enough to be alone. I wasnât enough of me, Eren, do you understand what I mean?â
She looks up into his anguished, verdant eyes. So full of fire and feeling, that obviously he would never understand. âI donât know who I am, without you, Eren.â And she knows even as she says it, that Eren would not understand. âIâm not like you, Eren. I canât leave, and still feel whole.â
âItâs not true, Mikasa,â he says. And Mikasa knows heâs just saying it because he cannot fathom, because heâs in denial.
âYouâll never be able to see yourself the way I do. The way other people do. The way other people look up to you. You could leave me and thrive.â He laughs bitterly. âIt terrifies me. You could leave me and be so much better off without me. Maybe youâd find someone else who isnât such a colossal fuck up. Maybe you donât even need anybody. Because youâ youâre so good, you donât see it.â
#oh my god what the fuck I never posted this#this is so angsty#i need to find a link to the prev ask#eremika#anonymous conversations
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Medical Appointment (Fanfic)
New Chapter of my Angst series đ
Carlo had recently woken up from his afternoon nap and Geppetto was glad that he was calm.
Then there was a knock at the door.
Geppetto was so frustrated he almost punched the wall, he is going to need to put up a sign to tell everyone to just leave them alone; Carlo now has a grin on his face and Geppetto is begging him again to behave himself, as he opens the door he is even angrier because he sees two familiar men in front of him, Simon and Paracelsus.
He unfortunately knows Simon well, Paracelsus not so much, he has seen him before while he had a few meetings with the alchemists but he never really bothered to talk to him aside from pleasantries.
âUncle Simon!â Carlo shouted from behind and gave Simon a big hug, and Geppetto could see that he was in deep pain, specially because of his state.
Carlo gave a friendly wave to Paracelsus and that confused Geppetto, as they had never met before and he didnât like where this was going, but he let them in and took them to the living room.
Paracelsus wastes no time in explaining why he is here, and how he came by last time when he wasnât home, Geppetto is furious, how dare he try to use his son as a scientific experiment? He clenched his fist, he had to restrain himself because right now he wants to hurt him.
âGeppetto you might not understand, but I want whatâs best for your sonâ
Thatâs fucking bullshit and he knows it, âWell, then help me understandâ
âMmm wellâ Paracelsus pauses and looks at Carlo, itâs best to have this conversation without him here, if he senses that he is a threat to his father he would probably break him in half, âCarlo sweetie, the grown-ups need to talk, why donât you go and play with your uncle Simon?â
Before Simon can even say anything Geppetto speaks up.
âYes Carlo, go and take your uncle Simon downstairs so you can play with himâ
Carlo is beaming with joy and forcefully grabs Simon and drags him to the basement.
âI think you enjoyed that just a littleâ Paracelsus has a smile on his face.
âA lot actually, now, explainâ Geppetto wants him to go straight to the point.
âGeppetto your son is special, with the arm of god his body has abilities that arenât normal for a humanâ
âIs that why he is so strong?â
âYes, and much more than that, did you know that when he got sick it was actually Influenza?â
âWhat?!â
Paracelsus explained some of the tests he did leaving out certain information of course and he also explained how Geppetto just by being near Carlo he is getting some of the same properties.
âWhatâs your goal here? If you-â But Geppetto was interrupted.
âI wonât harm him, trust me, the healthier he is, the better for me, plus I already have Simon to do the more, invasive, testsâ Paracelsus smiles even wider, it just makes him so happy to run tests on Simon.
âAnd why should I cooperate with you?â Geppetto doesnât like this at all.
âBecause I know you caused the frenzy and I can blow the whistle whenever I wantâ
Geppetto bites his lip, then he has no choice.
âI also know about Carloâs very fun hobby, although Iâm surprised he hasnât killed in a whileâ
âShut upâ
âDo you know how many people your son has killed Geppetto?â
âNo, and I donât want to hear it, shut up, he doesnât know any betterâ
For a moment Paracelsus thinks about telling him, or at least imply that it is in the double digits, but again, he doesnât want Carlo to realize that Geppetto is angry at him.
âForgive me, letâs not fight, we can work together without a hassle if we agree on a few thingsâ
âLike what?â Geppetto is trying to calm himself but itâs hard to do so when it involves Carlo, he doesnât care what happens to him, but he wonât let anyone harm his son, not ever again.
âI need to run tests on Carlo from time to time, and I need you to just be a good father and tell your son how brave he is for staying so strong while the doctor is giving him a check upâ
Geppetto closes his eyes in frustration, but he has no choice in the matter and itâs best to try and âget alongâ with Paracelsus, or at least not be hostile.
âIf you hurt Carlo in any way, Iâll kill you myself before he does itâ Itâs not a threat, itâs a promise, not all puppets got destroyed, and Geppetto still has the universal command to control them.
âYou have my word that I wonâtâ
âDo we have a deal then?â Paracelsus can tell that Geppetto is still fully convinced so he decides to give him something fun.
âIâll let you borrow Simon when we do them, let me give you a little break from caring for Carlo, his uncle should be able to babysit him from time to timeâ
âWe have a deal thenâ
Paracelsus let out a small laugh, but unfortunately for Geppetto he wasnât done talking.
âNow, remember how I mentioned how being near Carlo is also affecting your health?â Paracelsus takes his tools out and he sees a shiver going down Geppettoâs spine.
âDonât worry, I promise Iâll be quick this timeâ he says as he holds a syringe. âNow be a good boy like your son and hold stillâ
ââ
Simon knew that Carlo was insane but he didnât think he was this insane.
Carlo was playing with his âtoysâ; Geppetto must be as insane as well because why the hell did he build his son this? The worst is seeing the puppet that was built of Venigni, he knew him in the past, and everything about it felt so wrong.
Carlo thinks they are the real ones, hell he thinks that stupid teddy bear is the real Romeo, Simon doesnât understand how thatâs even possible, how he is so delusional, but he isnât crazy so obviously he wouldnât understand.
Simon sees Carlo become quiet, extremely quiet and itâs starting to worry him, and he isnât prepared for what he hears when Carlo finally speaks up again.
âUncle Simon⌠where is Sophia?â
He doesnât know, how would he know? Carlo isnât his brother.
âI miss her, I havenât seen her in so longâ
Simon stares at Carlo, who is looking at him expectantly, should he lie and say she is alive? If he does that then he is going to start making excuses of where she is supposed to be, and worse why Carlo canât see her. Even if he is honest would Carlo believe him? Would his mind process that Sophia is dead or will it just refuse to accept it?
âSophia isâŚawayâ
âAway where?â Carlo asks so innocently.
âShe is living now with some relatives that arenât from Kratâ Itâs the best excuse he come up with, âIâve told you before right? That our family comes from somewhere else?â
âMmmmâ Thatâs all Carlo says, and Simon starts to get worried about whether Carlo will ask for more clarification but he seems to be content with that and stops asking.
He stops asking about Sophia but he wonât shut up with his questions.
âWhat are you sick from?â
Nothing, Paracelsus is just a maniac that keeps him sick against his will.
âItâs complicated Carlo you wouldnât understandâ
âDoes he care good care of you?â
No. âHe doesâ
âDo you like himâ
âYesâ there is no hesitation in his voice this time.
There was a pause.
No, thatâs not true I donât like him.
You love him.
No, no, no I donât like him, I donât love him, I hate him, I hate him.
âUncle Simon, whatâs wrong?â Carlo asks, and Simon realizes that he is shaking and small tears are rolling down his eyes.
Simon falls onto the floor, he is now on his knees.
âAre you feeling sick?â
Simon canât speak, he doesnât even know what he feels anymore, but Carlo hugs him, gently this time, and Simon hugs him back because he really needs to feel comfort, to feel warmth.
Thankfully he manages to compose himself and stand up again. He lets out a sigh a pats Carlo in the head.
âYou are a good boy Carloâ
ââ
Carlo and Simon are now upstairs, and Geppetto looks very uncomfortable but he is trying to put up a strong front so as to not let Carlo notice.
âDaddy, are you okay?â Dammit, he noticed.
âYes Carlo, Iâm fine, I just⌠donât like injectionsâ
Paracelsus rolls his eyes, that was nothing compared to what he does to Simon, and Geppetto is going to have to get used to getting tested as well.
âAww Carlo look at that, you are even braver than your daddyâ
Carlo has a smile on his face and Geppetto is giving Paracelsus a death stare.
As they are making their way to leave, Simon has an idea, he isnât going to let Paracelsus go outside with his ego intact.
âCarlo before we leave, why donât you give Paracelsus a hug? He is going to be your special doctor so he deserves your love tooâ
âWaitâ Paracelsus tries to protest but-
âGo ahead son, Paracelsus is like your new uncle, give him one of your big hugs, to show how much you love himâ Geppetto says.
Before Paracelsus can say anything else Carlo hugs him, a suffocating hug, too suffocating, when Carlo finally lets go he falls to the floor, desperately gasping for air.
He looks up to see that Geppetto and Simon both smirking, Carlo is beaming with joy and saying how happy he is to have a new uncle. Before Paracelsus can get up again, Carlo gets closer and whispers something in his ear.
âI knowâ
Paracelsus feels dread, Carlo knows that he is special, he might not know exactly how but Carlo knows and he is now taking advantage full advantage of his strength; That he shouldnât underestimate him, and Paracelsus wonât make the same mistakes because God knows what the boy has up his sleeves.
When all is said and done, Geppetto turns to look at his son.
âCarlo, you were a really good boy today, do you want Daddy to play with you?â Geppetto doesnât like the games Carlo makes him play, but today his son deserves a small reward.
#lies of p#lop#liesofp#lies of p game#lies of p fanfic#lies of p geppetto#ao3 link#this is in ao3 too#lies of p carlo#lies of p simon#lies of p giangio
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my walk to the park today fucking suuucked too because it was so crowded with kids whose parents weren't watching them so I couldn't swing without a toddler running right in front of my feet every 4 minutes. as I was walking there these random guys were yelling weird shit at me and laughing like "heeey buddy" *obnoxious laughter* *homophobic intent* *kill yourselves* I'm just so pissed about everything everything makes me angry the aura around me is hostile constantly nothing makes me calm down when I think of everything else going on. I got so scared not just for my brothers physical health but his mental health too as he has the burden of his chronic illness now at such a critical time. I feel so inadequate at my job lately which is usually my second home. Just small details that I've been blowing up over because I'm so dissatisfied with everything lately. and Ive been getting angrier at redacted than I have in months and as time passes I want to make up our friendship less and less with redacted as I think back on the past 5 months and how downright shitty and emotionally childish he's been to me while acting like he's mature and holier than thou. I'm so full of sadness and anger. It's all so heavy. I'm scared to go back to therapy with these normal people problems when the last my therapist saw me I was stuck in such a small box completely restricted in life experience by my severe anxiety and self loathing. now it's almost as if I care about myself so much so that I can't tolerate when I see others mistreating me. who else is going to protect me. I've come out of my mental shell and the real world is so disheartening. how am I supposed to fall in love with this
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@spitblaze Thurston and I are doing a multi-part Jojo rewatch right now, and last night we watched Red Hot Chili Pepper parts 1 and 2 and it made me think of this. Part 1 in particular really reinforces your thoughts a lot, IMO -
The sequence of events from the point RHCP takes the motorcycle to the time he escapes through the underground wires has Okuyasu exhibit a bunch of behaviors that I associate VERY heavily with how my ADHD functions, tbh. I'll toss some manga caps here
First we start off with the motorcycle trick (v badass), Okuyasu shaves the bike in half to remove RHCP's power source. This is what Josuke says to that, specifically:
noted by Josuke here is that Okuyasu's perceived "dumbness" is not a lack of intelligence, it's a lack of application. so that totally fits (also check out Jotaro's perfect cylinder of a head lmao)
Emotions are running quite high though -
now, I should explain that at least when it comes to myself, I consider almost all my disordered thinking to be a result of ADHD - I also have a medical diagnosis of depression, but I feel like the depression is stemming from the ADHD root, and same goes for my BPD.
bearing that in mind, I think this moment (and what we are about to see happen) are really good examples of that ADHD thing where difficulty with regulating emotion causes a system overload that means making decisions can be really fucking difficult - again, something Okuyasu KNOWS about himself, but only acknowledges the nurture-source (his brother's bullying) vs. also understanding the nature-source (the adhd). hopefully that makes sense. Onward:
There is a several-page long battle between Oku+The Hand and RHCP. During this sequence RHCP is constantly belittling him and calling him slow. Even as he becomes angrier (to say nothing of the pre-existing rage surrounding his brother's murder), Okuyasu gains the upper hand:
Jotaro tells Okuyasu to wait for the three of them to make their way there so they can ask the Stand the location of the bow and arrow. Grabbing his only chance, RHCP begins applying mental pressure to Okuyasu immediately, exploiting his decision anxiety (which tbh now that I think about it could be an instance of Demand Anxiety, huh):
This actually spans the end of one manga chapter and leads into another. In the next chapter, this type of inner dialogue/pressure is given super heavy emphasis:
I mean. I've fucking been here before lol. The stakes being so high makes it worse
I'm just going to post the entire following page because I really love Araki's paneling and it's also just so, so fucking relateable
i'm not gonna rehash the rest of the fight blow by blow, RHCP gets away due to a shenanigan, etc and so forth
One thing that totally stood out to me though was this part, which reminded me of you talking about how hard he is on himself. Not one of the other three even so much as say a word criticizing him after he took the swing that exposed the underground cables, but here he is:
shrug emoji. i can't actually think of a better example of what you were talking about (but i'm gonna be thinking about it through the rest of this rewatch)
sry for the long post. I am Thinking About Jojo Again
Yknow. I feel like part of Okuyasu's insistence that he's 'dumb' might be like.......okay so I personally I look at him and see a dude with adhd, almost definitely unmedicated because almost every medication for that was Very Illegal in Japan until very recently. So that almost definitely has an affect on his grades in some way, and being the pragmatic kinda guy he is he probably takes school seriously enough that he's gotten it in his head that his grades are a reflection of his self-worth, if not his intelligence. Does he get better grades than Josuke? Probably. Does it still tear his self-esteem to shreds when he gets his homework back and see that he got so many questions wrong when he remembered to do it in the first place? Also probably. But this is delving into headcanon territory now so. Idk. Okuyasu isn't dumb! He's emotional and loud and maybe a smidge impulsive but he's a teenager and none of that exactly a measure of intelligence is it!!!
EXACTLY!!! And like, without a doubt he's got a pile of anxiety (specifically surrounding making decisions, this is canon to the text) that probably extends to many aspects of his life. He's suffered all kinds of abuse and lack of support for his entire life, and like - re: grades in school, he's shown to get low scores on at least one English test (that Koichi got a VASTLY lower score on, and this is like veryyyyy early in the story when he had only recently gone through everything with losing his brother and all that) but as you said, he's literally a fucking teenager and it's absurd to me that people can take what he's saying about being "dumb" at face value. Totally reads heavy ADHD to me and also due to his delinquent brother's influence I think initially he probably wouldn't have put very high value on day to day schoolwork but pragmatic is a fucking great word to describe him tbh!
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ahh hi! may i request Midoriya, denki, and shinsou (if you don't wanna do all these than that's alright!) reacting to a male or gn s/o flinching during a fight? like they were having a little argument s/o thinks they're about to get like- smacked for whatever reason and flinches? sorry if this is a bad req if this makes you uncomfortable that by all means delete/ignore! sorry my english is bad ahh
Their Reaction to Their S/o Flinching During An Argument || Midoriya, Bakugou, and Todoroki
Masterlist 1 || Masterlist 2
â Authorâs Note: Okay so I know these weren't the characters you requested but I don't write for Denki (anymore) or Shinsou, I apologize!! I still hope you enjoy this tho!! Thank you for requesting!! - JJ <3
â Characters: Izuku Midoriya, Katsuki Bakugou, and Shoto Todoroki x gn!Reader
â Summary: Their reaction to their partner flinching during an argument, as if they were going to hit them
â Genre: Angst/hurt/comfort
â Word Count: 600+
â Warnings: Arguing, mentions of smacking, no actual violence tho
â Notes: None
Izuku Midoriya
The argument was over something pretty stupid, and Izuku did admit he got a little loud but he hadnât expected you to flinch like that
âAnd I told you that- did you just flinch?â He immediately got quiet when you flinched, he had just raised his hands and moved them a bit to further explain with his hands, what he was saying out loud
âUm- yeah-? You werenât gonna smack me-?â You asked, letting out a little bit of a breath when you realized he wasnât going to hit you
âNO OF COURSE NOT WHY WOULD I DO THAT? ARE YOU OKAY-?â
He accidentally got a little loud again from the pure shock of you thinking that he was going to smack you
âIâm so sorry for getting loud and making you flinch and Iâm sorry I made you think I would hit you and Iâm sorry I got loud again and Iâm sorry and I would never do that and I just hope that-â
âIzuku I forgave you an hour and a half ago-â
He feels really really bad and keeps apologizing for it periodically throughout the week, he just feels really really bad about the whole situation and heâd never hurt you and he hates that he made you think that he would
Katsuki Bakugou
Katsukiâs loud, violent, and even pretty mean at times, but normally not to you, thatâs why you were so shocked that he was being so rude to you
You had tried talking to him about it when he suddenly snapped at you, going off about how youâre annoying and stupid and that you need to just leave him alone
While he was going on his rant, he lifted his hand to run it through his hair causing you to flinch back and he immediately stopped, his face softening a great deal, â...did you just flinch because of me?â
At first you thought he was going to blow up on you for flinching, but instead he just sighed and genuinely apologized
âIâm sorry.â
Now that might seem like nothing to anybody else but Katsuki doesnât apologize, not like that, youâre not sure you had ever even heard him utter the words âim sorryâ in the 6 months that you two had been dating, but he just did and then he shocked you even more when he went on
âI didnât mean to get loud. Iâm just in a bad mood. But Iâd never lay my hands on you, I swear. Can I give you a hug?â
Katsuki also never asked for hugs or anything like that, he always waited for you to initiate so this also came as a shock to you, but you accepted his hug and his apology and hugged him, forgiving him for what he did
Shoto Todoroki
Shoto doesnât get mad or fight with you often, so when he does, itâs really fucking scary
He was getting really loud and you could tell from the look on his face that he was pissed off, his skin even looked like it was fuming, he didnât even make a move with his body, you just heard the tone in his voice get even angrier and louder, so you flinched
He paused right where he was, and attempted to calm his anger for a few seconds before speaking, âI apologize for scaring you. Iâm assuming you flinched because you were scared I would hit you, but I was not going to do that and I never would do that. I know I got a little loud and I hope youâll forgive me, love.â
Even though you accept his apology, heâd still probably bring you a gift the next day, probably something ridiculously expensive that you donât need but he insists that you need it
#izuku midoriya x reader#bnha x reader#mha x reader#bnha#mha#bnha headcanons#mha headcanons#katsuki bakugou#katsuki bakugou x reader#izuku comfort#izuku midoriya#izuku x reader#midoriya x reader#midoriya comfort#midoriya angst#izuku angst#katsuki angst#katsuki comfort#bakugou x reader#katsuki x reader#shoto todoroki x reader#shoto x reader#todoroki x reader#shoto todoroki#todoroki fluff#todoroki comfort#shoto angst
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HI! I love your work! If you are alright with writing angst then can I request Headcannons With Usopp + Ace + Shanks (separately) when Their s/o gives them the silent treatment after a pretty bad argument? (Fluff at the end please!!)
Donât forget to take your time!
Usopp, Ace & Shanks with Fem! S/O after a Bad Fight!
Summary: You and your boyfriend got into a nasty fight and now you won't talk to him. So, he made a plan to have you back in his arms once again.
God Usopp:
- Usopp is a pretty prideful when it comes to his skills and lying, which can be a disadvantage for him sometimes.
- One day, Usopp accidentally broke your favorite figurine. Not wanting to face your wrath, he puts the blame on Chopper nervously.
- Poor Chopper has no idea so it's clearly not him that did it.
- Your anger went tenfold. How DARE Usopp broke your figurine and fucking blame it on the innocent reindeer doctor?! Heck, he didn't even apologized to you and Chopper!
- You were hurt, mad, frustrated all at the same time. You thought Usopp would never lie to you but he just did.
- So you decided to punish him by giving him the silent treatment. And boy it took a huge toll on the long-nosed sniper :()
- He tried talking to you but obviously it didn't work since you will turn the other way and pretended he's not there.
- Usopp was sad and mad. Sad because the love of his life was ignoring him and Mad at himself because he fucking lied to your face.
- He would cry silently when he thinks no one can see. But Robin did.
- Robin, a close friend of yours, lectured Usopp about not lying to you anymore and told him he should admit his own fault and not blame others. The sniper nodded his head shamefully at every word the archeologist told him.
- Usopp is a great inventor so he went on a mission to make you forgive him. He will remake your figurine with Franky teaching him. The cyborg wanted to help him but Usopp declined, wanting to do it all by himself, pouring his heart on his work.
- You returned to your room just to see Usopp carefully placing the figurine on the desk. The man flinched once he noticed you looking at him.
- "Uhm, I... I'm just gonna leave this here and leave immediately! I swear!" About to run out, you stopped Usopp by hugging him.
- Usopp, having missed your warmth, cried softly and apologized repeatedly to you, snot running down his long nose.
- "I promise I won't lie to you ever again! I swear with all of my heart!"
- And you trust his words, knowing how genuine he was being.
Portgas D. Ace:
- Ace was mad. Livid even.
- After a huge battle with the Marines, you were injured from protecting him.
- He was angered at the fact that you protected him even if he can protect himself!
- After being dismissed from the medbay, you went to your shared room with Ace. Just to see the said man sitting on the bed with his head on his hands, fingers gripping his hair.
- Ace didn't even look at you when you entered the room which confuses you. Usually, he would tackle you into a hug by now. So why isn't he-?
- "Why did you do it?" His deep voice spoke, spooking you with its harshness.
- "Uh, what do you mean, Ace?" You shifted on your feet as you already knew what he was talking about. You gulped when he looked up at you, eyes glaring daggers.
- "Why the fuck did you took the blow?! Don't you trust my powers? Don't you trust me?"
- Scoffing, you crossed your bandaged arms, your own eyes glaring back at him. "I saw that bastard sneaking up to you! Of course, I would be fucking worried! He had a sea stone knife, for fuck's sake!"
- Growing angrier than he already was, Ace stood up and went to stare down at you. "You got hurt! What if you fucking died because of me? Huh?! Don't you think it will not devastate me?! Fuck no! You're the love of my life! The one who owns my heart! And yet you don't trust me that I can protect myself!"
- Tears started to drip down your eyes, you never imagined the sweet and precious Ace would get mad at you and starts yelling at you. Frustrated, you slapped him across the face.
- "Well, screw you Portgas! Can't a girlfriend be worried about her boyfriend's well-being?! Besides that, this pain is nothing compared to the thought of losing you! Don't you think it will not devastate me?! You know what? Fuck you! If you seriously think you're the strongest and cannot be defeated by anyone, then let's break up!"
- Stunned, Ace was left standing in his room (not your shared room anymore). He didn't know he was crying until he felt tears started to flow from his eyes, blurring his vision. What have he done?
- Meanwhile, you were in a similar state, curling up next to Izo as the said man rubs your back gently, trying to make you stop crying.
- After that day, you ignored Ace, the freckled man trying his best to talk to you but you denied his every approach. You even sat away from him when it's breakfast, lunch and dinner.
- Ace was getting desperate so he begged Marco and Thatch to help him talk to you. Seeing how devastated the younger man was, the two agreed. They thought of a plan before putting it into action.
- You were washing the dishes when you suddenly got grabbed from behind and was carried to the pantry. You tried getting out but seems like your abductors locked you in the room. Huffing angrily, you looked around the room just to see a sheepish looking Ace holding a bouquet of your favorite flowers.
- Your ex was blushing, looking away from you as he holds up the bouquet. "F-for you."
- You clicked your tongue in irritation. "That's it? You guys locked me in here with you just to give me flowers?! What the hell, Portgas?"
- Ace flinched under your glare, tears started to blur his eyes once again. "I'm sorry." He tried to wipe away his tears off but they kept on flowing. "I didn't mean to get mad at you... I was mad at myself for not watching my back and not being able to protect you... I'm so sorry, Y/n. I truly don't deserve an amazing girl like you. You don't deserve the son of a demon like me. I'm so sorry." He sobbed.
- Now crying yourself, you went to hug him, hiding your tear-stained face on the man's bare chest.
- You and Ace hugged like there's no tomorrow, your hearts slowly mending as the two of you shared a kiss full of love.
- "I love you, Ace."
- "I love you too, Y/n."
- You guys were startled when you heard the cheering and sobbing from the outside of the pantry. Apparently, your crewmates were listening in to your reunion.
- "You fools! Get back to work!" "SORRY, POPS!" And scrambling footsteps were heard and away from the pantry.
- You and your boyfriend shared a hearty laugh, never letting go of each other <3
Emperor Shanks:
- Shanks is a very handsome and charming man, we all know that, right? As an Emperor, the redhead would obviously be popular, especially among the ladies.
- You were angrily cutting up the vegetables, thinking how a certain emperor's good looks was a curse too. To you, at least.
- Let's rewind, shall we?
- After docking to a tropical island, the Red Hair Pirates immediately disembarked to get supplies and swing by the bar. Apparently, you belonged to the first group with Benn and some responsible members while the rest (Shanks included) ran to the nearest bar to get drunk.
- You were helping with the list of supplies when suddenly, Benn went up to you, patting your shoulder.
- "You should go to Shanks and the others. I'll take care of the rest." He smiled at you.
- You thanked him before dashing to the bar where your redhead boyfriend and the others were.
- You were excited, the thought of finally taking a break and drink booze with your boyfriend makes you grin. You pushed the bar's doors open just to frown at the sight before you.
- There sat Shanks drinking booze while a bunch of girls fawn over him, touching him shamelessly.
- Yasopp noticed your form at the doorway, waving you over. "Hey, Y/n! Over here!"
- But you just ignored the sniper, instead you went up to Shanks, pull away the leeches off of him, and smacked him on the face, real hard.
- "Fucking idiot!" You stomped away, leaving everyone in the bar stunned by your actions.
- Shanks, now snapped out of his drunken stupor, went after you, calling your name.
- He finally caught up to you and pins you down in a nearby alleyway.
- "What's wrong with you?" Shanks looked at you while rubbing his reddened cheek, wincing. "Why'd you smack me?"
- Livid, you grabbed his collar, tugging him down to your height. "What's wrong with me? NO! The real question here is: What the fuck is wrong with you, dumbass!" You pushed him away, eyes glaring daggers at him still. "You were letting those bitches latch on you while your girlfriend is busy with work! And now you have the fucking audacity to ask me what's wrong with me?! The fucking nerve!"
- Annoyed, Shanks scoffed at you. "Oh please! I wasn't interested in any of them anyway. I already told them that I already have a girlfriend but they kept on touching me. What am I supposed to do?!"
- You laughed in disbelief before snarling at him, pushing him away. "Well, what do loyal boyfriends do? Exactly, you push away those bitches and never let them touch you! You have a fucking girlfriend, Shanks! You're supposed to not let some hoes latch to you! But you know what? Go back to those girls! I'm sick and tired of this for always happening!"
- Shanks furrowed his brows in confusion, "What do you mean?"
- You clicked your tongue, "I'm breaking up with you, obviously! See you at the ship, Captain." You proceeded to walk away, leaving the redhead dumbfounded.
Now back to the present...
- "Y/n, please talk to me!" Shanks has been pestering you everyday, wanting to talk with you but you didn't let him.
- You rolled your eyes, told Lucky Roo that you'll help him later and then walk away, Shanks trailing after you like a lost puppy.
- The red haired emperor kept on talking about random things, trying to get responses from you but you just ghosted him, doing chores around the ship.
- The crew was sighing, shaking their heads as they watched their usually cheery captain reduced to a kicked puppy wanting attention.
- As your family, they huddled up, planning to get you two back together again.
- And that is why you and Shanks found yourselves on a small secluded island, alone, without the Red Force in sight.
- You were mad at your crew for doing you dirty like that but since Shanks won't give up, you let him talk. And talk he did.
- "First off, I'm sorry. I actually don't like those girls and I don't know why they kept latching on me. Second, I miss you. Your hugs, your warmth, your kisses. I miss all of it."
- Shanks looked like he was regretting all of his life decisions so you talked to him, finally.
- "I forgive you and I miss you too, dummy."
- With those words, you found yourselves hugging on the sand, laughing your hearts out.
Meanwhile at the hidden Red Force....
- Your crew were passing their bets around, Yasopp and his group winning with their bet on who will apologize first, which was Shanks.
- They were whooping and cheering once they made the ship visible to the two of you, their loud voices making you and Shanks looked at them.
- Angered, you went up to the ship, beating the shit out of your stupid crewmates for leaving you and Shanks on the island. But you were still grateful for their stupidasses.
- Shanks never let anyone touch him or you ever again, his right arm constantly latched around your shoulder or hand to show others that you are in a happy relationship together :D
Hello, @gl00ml ! Hope you like this, bestie! Sorry if I got carried away with Shanks, haha! XD
Also, let me know if I did Usopp right, this is the first time I wrote for him after all :P
#god ussop#portgas d. ace#akagami no shanks#one piece usopp x reader#portgas d ace x reader#one piece shanks x reader
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âHey, doggy.â
Villain freezes, feet suddenly too heavy to move and heart pounding fast enough to try to flee from their chest by itself.
âSince when do you wear a collar?â Hero laughs above them, legs dangling over the edge of a rooftop.
If they could move, they would. But their body feels stuck to the ground and their stomach flips with both hate and panic, and all Villain manages is to look straight at Heroâs sparkly eyes, facing laughter with darkness as they jump to the floor and land in front of them.Â
âWhy would that be any of your business?â Villain says, soft as a threat. Low as they were taught.
âIs it a kink or something like that?" Hero smirks. "If you had told me about it, this fight between us could've been so different, sweetheart."
Villain smiles and hopes that the emptiness behind it is hidden enough to pass as sarcasm. âWhy donât you go back to your oh-so brave team and leave me be? Are you this desperate for attention?â
But apart from a snort, Hero dismisses the comment and comes closer. With horror slowly seeping into Villainâs veins, they donât even think about stepping away before Hero stops toe on toe with them and reaches out to play with the leather surrounding their neck.
Theyâve grown used to it, by now. Barely scratches anymore, and only when they remember itâs there do they feel the pressure circling their airways. When that happens, though, itâs hard to keep from falling on the ground clawing at the stiff leather and struggling to breathe.
âItâs pretty,â Hero comments, lifting a brow as they trace the collarâs edge, only the tip of their finger grazing Villainâs skin. It is still enough for their breath to quicken.Â
âLeave me alone,â Villain says, hoping their voice doesnât sound as strangled as it feels.
âDid you always use it underneath your uniform and I never saw it before or is it new?â
âHeroââ
âIt isnât what I expected, but I have to admit it makes you that much more interesting.â
âI canâtââ
âIf I tell you to sit, will you obey?â
âFuck you.â
Heroâs laugh is loud and unrestrained, and it wouldâve made Villain angrier if it didnât make Hero lower their hand as they take a step back and bend over with laughter.
âYou are a gem, Villain,â they say in between giggles.
You are my gem, Villain dear. Now take off your shirt and bring me the whip so I can carve you into something beautiful.
Villainâs breath catches, and for a second, thereâs no dark alley and laughing Hero. Thereâs a wide room and a wall of weapons they are way too familiar with.
âWhat if I tell you to roll?â Hero mocks, leaning against a brick wall with a smile dancing on their lips.
And what if I order you to roll over, dear?
I roll over. I am yours to play with and obey, Supervillain.
Very well. Roll over.
âCâmon, Iâm just playing with you,â Hero says, cocking their head. âYou donât have to make that face. You do you, I just think itâs amusing to see the villain who wrecks my town wearing a collar.â
They blink, and the streetlights are dimmer than the one in their memory. Again, and Heroâs grin isnât as cruel as Supervillainâs. Once more, and they are back in the present.
Did Hero say something?
âVillain?â they call, the grin faltering for just a second as they approach them again, a slight crease between their brows. âYou home?â
âI have to go,â Villain sighs. The moon is almost at its peak, and they are almost late.Â
âNo, Iâm having so much funââ
Villain rolls their eyes, and when they do, something shines in their vision and sends a shiver down their spine. The moon already is at its peak.
ââtell me more about the collar, how long do I have to make up for not noticing it? Because I have a ton of jokes readyââ
They are late they are late they are late. They canât be late.
They donât even look at Hero as they bolt forward, as fast as their trembling legs will allow. Supervillainâs breath blows against their ear, whispering threats and promises that arenât there anymore. For now, at least.Â
âWait!â Hero shouts, running after them. Villain grits their teeth and speeds up, but they are so very tired and not even the rush of adrenaline is enough to beat Hero, who catches up way too fast and grabs them by the jacket.
Villain stops as soon as they feel Heroâs hands on the back of their neck, weakly trying to squirm away from the touch as they gasp for air.
âWhat is this little box?â Hero muses and Villainâs stomach drops somewhere close to their feet.Â
âHero, stop, Iâm late, can you justââ
Heroâs fingers touch the box attached to the collar, and electricity answers.Â
Too late.
It explodes into Villainâs body, bolts of lightning forcing them on their hands and knees. The feeling is known, but it doesnât matter how many times theyâve been shocked, it still feels like the first time. Villain convulses on the sidewalk, sobs falling down their lips and half-formed pleads following, almost inaudible.
âP-p-ple-please,â they pant. âS-s-stop, plâ mmph, Iâll b-be good, ple-ease!â
Once it finally stops, all that echoes inside their mind is the pressing need to please Supervillain, be good, run back home so the shocks wonât start again.
When Heroâs voice sounds, Villain barely understands it.
âVillain,â they whisper, kneeling in front of them, all traces of a smile gone, only an unsaid question written in their weirdly worried eyes.
Villain rolls to their side and pretends not to see it. âP-ple-please. Have t-to get back.â
âIs it Supervillain? The one doing this to you?â
âPlease,â Villain murmurs, curling in on themself.
For once, Hero doesnât try to force them to talk. They simply wrap their arms around Villain's shaky form and lift them carefully, holding them against their chest.
âIâll get you to your base,â Hero promises, voice so serious Villain looks up with wide eyes, surprised by the anger behind the words. âAnd then Iâll deal with Supervillain.â
âN-no, pââÂ
Electricity erupts from the collar again, and as a wave of searing, sharp pain travels through their body, all Villain can do is writhe in strong arms that hold them tighter, and muffle their screams against Heroâs neck.
-
(continued here)
#whump#whump writing#hero x villain#heroes and villains#villain whumpee#shock collar#collar whump#villain whump#electrocution#flashback cw#whip mention#implied torture
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Flatmate! Harry: Iâll Make It Up To You - Part 1
Warnings: Swearing, slight angstÂ
Please like if itâs not too shabby, reblog for anyone who may enjoy this and follow if you want to see more! Any suggestions are happily taken for future writing! I love you all! be safe and be kind x
Part 2Â - Part 3
âââââââââ
You was going to kill him. This was the last straw and you had used up every ounce of patience today.
âHarry Edward Styles! Get in here right now or I swear to fucking god you wonât ever breath again!â You shout, your hands clutching the towel wrapped around your body. Your hair styled in a bouncy blow dry with a full face of makeup, a brown smoky eye and a nude lip.
The two of you bicker and argue like enemies, laugh like the best of friends and love each other like a married couple. Although you were only flat mates and nothing had ever gone further than friends, you knew Harry would never see you in that way, however the tiniest part of you had always hoped one day youâd be proven wrong. But you knew all along youâd rather have him as a best friend than lose him all together.
You hear the footsteps round the corner and a grin like the Cheshire Cat plastered on Harrys face âDo you mind? Iâm trying to write some music Y/Nâ he smirks.
âWhere the hell are all my clothes?! And where the fuck is my guitar?!â You shout angrily. You were no stranger to practical jokes in this house, both giving and receiving them. But today was different. You had the most important audition of your lifetime, and half of your room had been emptied.Â
The laughter escaping Harryâs lips was making you angrier and angrier by the second. âI told you that youâd regret stealing my jumpers!â He smirks.
âThat doesnât mean you take everything I own! Now where to hell is it all?!â
âAh now you seeâŚthis is where it gets funâŚyou see weâve made you a little scavenger hunt to find it all. All you have to do is-â
âWe?! Whoâs we?!â You growl through gritted teeth.
âOk okâŚI canât take all the credit for thisâŚNiall helped. SoâŚhereâs the rules!â
âHarry!â You cut him off âI donât have time for a fucking scavenger hunt! I have my audition in an hour and Iâm already running late! Just get me some fucking clothes and my guitar so I can leave!â
As soon as you had mentioned your audition, the smug grin fell from Harrys face and his rosy cheeks had drained to pale âoh shit. T-thatâs today?! IâŚI thought it was Fridayâ he frowns âw-well all your stuff is in Niallâs car and heâs in Brighton so I can just get him to drive back asap andâŚâ he fumbles for his phone quickly.
âBrighton?! Harry you have 3 seconds to tell me this is a joke before I rip your pretty little head off! Thatâs 2 hours away Harry! Iâll never make it in time!â
âY/N Iâm so sorry! I am I really am, I would never have done this today if I knewâ Guilt filling his eyes.
âYou knew Harry! Itâs written on the fridge, on the calendar and you helped me rehearse two days ago!â
âWhy donât I just go and buy you something to wear?â He offers, although he was currently terrified to speak incase his head really did get ripped off. He hadnât seen you this angry since you pierced holes in three of your ex-boyfriends tyres after finding out he cheated.
âWell thatâs pointless because I havenât got my guitar and you donât even have your acoustic guitar here. Forget it Harry. Just get out.â You mutter, your head hanging low in disappointment. Even if you left now youâd be late, and that was frowned upon. Turning up anywhere late was bad enough, let alone an audition. If youâre going to turn up late, then thereâs no point turning up at all because you wouldnât even be given a chance. The entertainment business was a difficult place to be, and this was your one chance to really make something bigger for yourself and it was ruined.
âY/N IâŚâ
âI said get out!â You scream, releasing the built up fury âgo and join Niall in Brighton for all I fucking care. Leave me alone. Iâm so disappointed Harryâ you felt the tears threatening to spill down your cheeks.
The sight of you on the verge of tears was enough to break his heart. He wanted to protest, he wanted to make it all better. But he knew you too well. He knew if he didnât leave you alone to calm down then it would make everything worse than it already was. He had never felt so guilty. In the 4 years you had lived together, practical jokes never made either of you angry. Sure they were embarrassing at times, but you two always had the best of times. At what made it even worse this time was that he had made you cryâŚand youâd used the âDâ word on him!
Harry had left, shutting the front door quietly as he headed to the studio to get out of your hair for a few hours. Also calling Niall in the process to get him to get the fuck home asap. It may have seemed like a pretty extreme joke, but they didnât intend it to turn out this way. The plan was that the scavenger hunt would lead you to Brighton with Harry to meet Niall there, and the three of you would spend the day and night by the beach, shopping, drinking, eating...everything that you loved to do.
As hours passed, you found yourself tucked under the mountain of blankets on the sofa, wearing a pair of Harryâs boxers, joggers and a white hoodie. Which you purposely chose because your makeup rubbed off on the collar and the sleeves as you wiped your tears.Â
You felt deflated and disappointed. You should have been more prepared...no actually, Harry shouldnât of been a dick. You knew he didnât mean to jeopardize your audition, but these auditions didnât come along often and part of you just wasnât ready to let this go yet.
Harry crept in quietly, although you didnât hear him, or at least you didnât want to. â Hey...Y/Nâ he whispers softly, walking through the living room door cautiously.
âHm?â you mutter, not allowing yourself to speak a word to him, and especially making sure your eyes were glued to Netflix, not giving him the satisfaction of paying attention.
âI...I got you theseâ He whispers, placing a big bouquet of red roses and white lilies on the glass coffee table in front of you. You looked straight passed them âOh wow...maybe I should send these over to the directors and producers to say sorry and maybe they can make an exception for little Y/N to try again!â you state sarcastically, but your facial expression staying as blank as possible.
He sighs softly and perches himself on the arm of the sofa, he gently pulls your shoulders back for you to rest your back against his thigh. âI know it doesnât change what I did Y/N, and believe me if I could of changed anything I would, and if I could turn back time, Iâd do anythingâ
âYou really fucked up Harryâ you whisper, your voice cracking gently as you wiped your tears on the sleeve of his hoodie. âYou donât get it. Youâre Harry Styles and you get everything handed to you on a plate because everyone already knows who you are! Youâve done what like...three auditions in your life and youâve succeeded every single one. Itâs not like that for me. I spent hours and hours practicing. And weeks just writing these songs in hope they get heard one day and now they wonât because word spreads really quick in this industry.â You still couldnât bring yourself to look into his eyes, because you hated people seeing you cry.Â
He sighed softly, staying silent as he pulled you up gently and sitting himself underneath you as he wrapped his arms around you tightly. He was always the first to help you rehearse when you had an audition, the first to comfort you if it went wrong or you didnât succeed, and the first to celebrate and congratulate you when you did get it. Unfortunately, this time no one will ever know how it would have gone. He knew he couldnât say much else because he knew you were right. Â
You wanted to resist, but instead you buried your face into his chest and whimpered softly. As disappointed as you were, you knew Harry was truly sorry and heâd hang onto this guilt for a while. He held you close as his gentle fingers raked through your hair.
âIâve put everything back in your room, all folded and neatâ He whispers âIâll make it up to you. I promiseâ He kept his arms around you supportively, although his chest was heavy with guilt, he already had a plan conjuring in his mind.Â
âââââââââ
#harry styles#harry styles imagine#one shot#hslot#flatmate!harry#roommate!harry#angst#lollypopsx#fanfic#imagine#harry styles x reader#harry styles x y/n#harry styles angst#harry styles fluff#one direction
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now all you see is red : santiago garcia x reader
Word Count: 3.6k+
Excerpt:Â âThereâs you, and God, Santi would let you completely ruin him.â
Warnings: Smut (18+), choking, spanking, light bondage, dom/sub dynamic, light degradation/humiliation, rough sex, angry sex, dirty talk
Santiago is familiar with anger.
He knows it well, heâs used to the bitter taste it leaves in his mouth, the smoke he can never fully push from his lungs, the way flames lick at his fingertips as his blood boils in his veins. Heâs used to the sharp bite and unrelenting sting, he knows the exact sound his fist is going to make when it meets drywall, can hear each bone crack on impact and can feel the sensation of his knuckles splitting open, can visualize the black and blue bruises that will mark his skin for weeks to come.
They might as well be permanent, he never feels like himself without those damn bruises anymore. Theyâve become an integral part of him, just like the scar on the back of his neck and the weight he carries on his shoulders day in and day out.
Just like his anger.
He needs it, he doesnât remember how to get through without it. Anger isnât a stranger to the ex soldier, but a lover.
Itâs a dance so intimate, one heâs performed thousands and thousands of times before. It keeps him grounded, reminds him that heâs real, that heâs here. Heâs alive and heâs breathing, heâs not lying at the bottom of a ditch in a foreign country with a bullet in his side, rotting. He made it out, heâs earned his temper.
Heâs in control. He has the power, and nothing is going to hurt him again. He wonât let it.
Except, thatâs not entirely true.
Thereâs you, and God, Santi would let you completely ruin him.
And you have, you so have. Youâve fucking wrecked him, but he refuses to let you see it, he doesnât even fully understand it himself. In all of the years youâve known each other, Santiâs been able to keep that little secret to himself, and heâs not about to give it up now, he doesnât need that shit.
What he needs is the control back in the palm of his hand after losing it for the last week. He needs to feel some sense of power after spending seven days in unfamiliar territory, feeling utterly torn apart by grief and worry.
Theyâd lost contact with you on your last assignment, and an entire week had gone by without so much as a word until you suddenly showed up at base, seemingly fine. Santi hadnât been able to find even a scratch on your perfect skin, and heâd checked several times just to be sure. Youâre fine.
But Santi isnât. Fuck, he is so fucking far from fine, he feels like heâs going to be sick. His initial relief is fading fast, threatening to turn into something that he has no desire to feel, something he doesnât know how to handle. He doesnât want it, doesnât need it.
He needs his control, his power. He needs familiarity.
So he latches onto the subtlest spark of anger the moment it strikes. He takes it and he fucking runs.
âWhat the fuck were you thinking?â
His voice is eerily calm, almost chilling and it doesnât waiver for even a second. Itâs collected while the rest of him isnât, but itâs enough to get him through. Itâll do.
âWhat do you mean?â
Youâre sitting at the end of the bed, unlacing your boots, desperate to get out of them and into something comfortable. Santi keeps his eyes glued to you, tracking your every movement with expert precision that heâs spent his entire life mastering.
âA week. You went a fucking week without report.â
You seem almost annoyed, and really, you are â youâd spent the last hour getting the same lecture from your boss, you donât need it from your boyfriend too even though itâs inevitable, so you shrug in response, and Santiago feels another white hot flash.
Itâs perfect. Heâll take it.
âIt wouldâve compromised the mission, he was onto me. Iâm fine.â
Youâre fine. He laughs bitterly at that.
âIâm glad youâre fine, princesa,â he hums, not thinking about how he enunciates his words as he stalks towards you, painstakingly slow, brown eyes never straying from his target.
Heâs quick, his reflexes sharp, and he has your chin between his fingers before you even register his hand moving.
âBut thatâs not a fucking excuse. You know your safety comes before anything else and we had no way to help you.â
âBut I was safe.â
âBut how were we supposed to know that, huh?â He shakes your head in his grip, like itâs enough to get you to see his way. âYou couldâve been dead for all we knew. Do you have any idea what-â
He stops himself. That unfamiliar emotion is bubbling in the pit of his stomach again, and he pushes it away, down, down, down where it canât touch him, canât hurt him.
He needs another spark.
But now, heâs struggling to find it, and itâs clear. Your eyebrows are furrowed as you watch him wrestle with himself and hesitate, and he panics when your lips part because he knows youâre getting ready to ask him if heâs okay and he doesnât fucking want you to. He doesnât want to answer you.
So he just growls again, his hand moving to the back of your neck where he pushes your head forward until your lips meet his in a kiss thatâs anything but gentle.
Itâs all teeth and desperation and frustration and just like your annoyance, itâs perfect. Santi clings to that frustration to fuel his anger again, and heâs satisfied when it works and he feels the familiar tendrils of rage wrap themselves around his body. His free hand moves to your shirt, and he uses his grip to haul you to your feet only to shove you towards the dresser. You catch yourself, knocking a few things off in the process but you donât care. You love it when he gets like this.
âSanti-â
âNo.â Heâs behind you again, his fingers tangling in your hair, pulling your head back so your neck is perfectly exposed to him, breath hot against your skin. âDonât you dare say a fuckinâ word, understand?â
You nod obediently â youâve always taken orders as well as he gives him.
âGood girl.â
He nips at your neck once, twice, three times before he sinks his teeth in, biting down, marking you and he smirks when he feels your knees buckle just slightly. Youâre struggling to hold yourself up already and heâs hardly touched you.
His hand travels around to the front of your neck and he wraps his fingers around your throat, not applying any pressure, simply just holding them there. He feels your pulse thrum under his fingertips and he counts along for a moment, smirking at just how quick your heart is beating.
âNervous baby?â
You hesitate, and he feels you gulp, feels the way you shift just slightly under his touch.
âNo.â
He tsks, sighing in your ear almost disapprovingly. He lets his grip tighten around your throat, and he revels in the sound of you trying to pull in air before he cuts you off completely.
âMaybe you should be.â
His free hand slams between your shoulder blades and youâre suddenly flat against the dresser, the force of it knocking what little air you had left in your lungs out. He gives you a second, just a second to use your safeword or to tell him to go a little easy, but you donât.
He knows youâll tell him if he needs to take it down a notch.
Thereâs nothing slow or patient about Santiagoâs touch. Itâs urgent, each movement made with purpose, never lingering, he doesnât have time for that. He just wants to feel you, just wants to feel that anger and the pleasure and nothing else.
He pulls your jeans down your thighs, not bothering to get them all the way off or worry about your shirt. His eyes are immediately on your ass, and he growls when he sees that youâre wearing his favorite color â red. He loves you in red.
Not enough to save the panties for another day though. He rips them clean off your body, the stretching, tearing sound of fabric making him groan alongside your gasp.
âOpen your mouth.â
You donât hear him the first time, too absorbed in the feeling running through you. He smacks your ass, hard, the sound reverberating through the quiet room. The moan that leaves your lips might just be the most sinful sound Santi has ever heard.
âOpen your fucking mouth.â
This time, you hear him, and you obey just like he knew you would, opening your mouth for him to stuff your panties into.
âFuck I can smell you on them from here princesa.â
He loves it. He loves it so fucking much. He smacks your ass a second time, feeling it turn hot under his touch, then he does it again and again and again until heâs satisfied with the way you flinch, until youâre laying limp against the dresser with tears running down your cheeks.
âColor?â
Like he said before, your safety means more to him than anything else, and through his anger he still always checks in to make sure youâre okay to continue. He never wants it to get to a point where he actually hurts you, even though he knows what your body can take, even though he knows youâd let him, youâd even ask him to.
You canât speak with your panties in your mouth, but one finger means green, two means yellow, and three means red. You hold up one, and he lands one final blow just to see if your answer changes. You still only hold up one.
âGood girl.â
He grabs your wrists and drags you back towards the mattress, and you immediately fall face down ass up just how you know he likes, but now he hesitates.
His knees are bothering him today, more so than usual, and he doesnât know if he can kneel behind you long enough to fuck you how he wants to.
That only makes him angrier, feeling like he canât perform. Feeling like heâs not good enough, like heâs failing in a field where heâs always personally felt like heâs excelled.
All he sees is red and you and itâs the exact distraction heâs been looking for, the perfect combination. His blood burns, his fingers burn, his mind is fucking screaming your name and nothing else. Thereâs nothing but you and the rage boiling in the pit of his stomach.
Itâs intoxicating, itâs everything, itâs familiar.
âNo, no no,â he laughs, shaking his head as he undoes his belt, hastily pulling it through the loops of his jeans. âOn your side, hands behind your back.â
Heâs on you the second you're in position, tightening his belt around your wrists so you canât move them, canât touch him. He chuckles darkly when your fingers wiggle around in search of something to hold onto.
âPoor baby,â he hums, voice completely condescending and he loves the way your eyes roll at the tone of his voice. He loves that you get off on this just as much as he does, he loves that you dance with his temper, that you know it almost as well.
Heâs so fucking hard. He canât wait any longer.
He doesnât check with his fingers to make sure youâre wet enough to take him, he knows you are. He can smell you, he can see your juices glisten when he hoists your leg up to reveal your pussy to him. Youâre always so wet, always so ready for him.
And heâs more than ready for you, stroking himself in the palm of his hand while he looks you over with hungry, dark eyes. His hand is nothing compared to the warmth and pleasure he knows youâll bring him, thereâs not a damn thing in this world that can make him come as hard as you.
He lays behind you, continuing to pump his length as he drags the tip of his cock through your folds, nudging at your clit and smearing his precome all around. He can feel you clench, can feel you try to pull him in as you start rocking your hips against him.
âJesus Christ, youâre acting like a fuckinâ whore for my cock babygirl. You need it, huh? You need me?â
You immediately start trying to beg through your makeshift gag and normally, that would only earn you more teasing but just like you, he canât take it. He needs you just as much, if not more.
His nails dig into your left hip as he pushes himself against your entrance, leaving little crescent shaped indents in your skin, his grip so tight you both know itâll bruise but itâs more than fine, itâs so good. He stops, wanting to drag it out for just a moment longer and your begging only continues, growing louder and louder until Santiago finally gives in.
All it takes is one sharp thrust and heâs so deep inside of you, spreading you open on his cock, tearing your walls apart to make room for his length, your bodies flush against each other. His free arm is wrapped underneath your body, his hand finding your neck again as he quickly sets his pace, not giving you more than a single second to even attempt to adjust to him.
Itâs hard, itâs fast, itâs dirty and your cunt is squelching around him so deliciously, the sound only pushing him further â he doesnât know if he wants to slow down so he can listen to it properly or if he wants to go faster.
âFuck,â he grunts into your ear, his voice gravely and rough and he thrills in the way it makes you shiver. âFuck youâre so tight, youâre squeezing my fucking dick baby. Howâre you this tight?â
You only let out a moan thatâs somewhere between a sob and a scream, and that sound alone is so entirely hot in itself, itâs enough to make his toes curl. He wants to pull that noise from you again and again and again, he wants you shaking and gasping and writhing. He starts using your hips for more leverage, knowing that he can get you to cry and whine for him this way.
You squirm and jolt each time he brings you back onto his cock, every time he hits that spot you didnât believe existed until he fucked you for the first time and he wants to explode as he watches you struggle to take it.
He knows youâll hold up your fingers if you need him to stop, but he still pulls your panties out of your mouth just so he can hear it, just so can listen for your words. You never say them, you only scream and cry and moan about how good it feels, how heâs pounding your pussy better than anyone ever has and how you never want him to stop.
âYeah baby?â he purrs, nipping at your earlobe, tugging on it as he thrusts harder and harder. âThis my pussy princesa? Tell me.â
âItâs yours,â you sob, clenching around him over and over. âGod Santi, itâs yours, Iâm yours.â
âThatâs fuckinâ right baby, thatâs it.â
He tightens his grip around your neck, his left hand moving from your hip to your clit, fingers matching the pace of his thrusts. Heâs rubbing you so hard, heâs almost surprised when you angle yourself closer, but thatâs his girl. Thatâs his fucking girl.
Santi can tell youâre close when your sounds grow higher in pitch and when he no longer needs to drag you back into his thrusts â youâre doing all the work for him, moving on your own accord, searching for that last little push you need to get over the edge and he lets you.
He lets you control the pace, lets you take what you need and thatâs when that unfamiliar, unwelcome feeling enters his stomach again. He tries to ignore it, tries to push it away, tries to tap back into the anger but once itâs gone, itâs gone.
Now heâs just frustrated, but he doesnât let himself get distracted, not when youâre on his cock, bringing yourself closer and closer to an orgasm he doesnât want to miss a second of.
He rolls onto his back suddenly, catching you off guard but he steadies you on top of him and uses your bound wrists to continue rocking you on his length while you get adjusted again. He brings his free hand back to your clit, just like before and itâs not long before youâre right on the brink of coming again. Santiâs right there with you, watching you roll your hips and bounce on his cock, impaling yourself on him again and again. Youâre so full of him, he only wants to fill you more.
He thinks he might actually let go first, but then youâre falling apart on top of him in a matter of seconds, sobbing his name so loudly while your thighs quiver and your body trembles. Thatâs what finally does it for him, and he comes inside of you with a deep groan that echoes in his chest, his back arching completely off the bed in an attempt to get even closer to you. He quickly grabs your hips again so he can continue to piston himself up into you, watching your combined release leak out of your pussy and coat his cock in glistening white. He only moans, quieter this time, and fucks it back into you, his pace slowing as his cock twitches over and over and quickly becomes oversensitive.
He doesnât forget to undo your hands before he pulls you back onto his chest, wrapping his arms tightly around you and burying his face into your neck. Heâs working hard to catch his breath, and he hopes that thatâs all you think heâs doing when really, heâs having to put twice as much effort into not falling apart.
His chest is heaving with emotion, his eyes are filling with tears that he refuses to let spill over. His anger is completely gone and only this remains. He doesnât know how to control it, doesnât know what to do with it and he hates it. He hates it so much.
And you notice, of course you fucking notice. Heâs slow to launch into aftercare and itâs obvious that heâs distracted through it, something heavy weighing on his mind.
âSanti, what is it? Did I do something wrong?â
âYou didnât fucking call.â
His voice waivers and cracks and his cheeks immediately turn red, though heâs not sure if itâs from embarrassment or this feeling settling in the pit of his stomach.
âWhat if something happened to you? You didnât call.â
âSanti,â you sigh, running a hand through your hair, and heâs frustrated all over again. Usually heâs so good at reading you, he knows you like the back of his hand, but again heâs unsure about the emotion. He doesnât know if youâre exasperated or if youâre concerned. He doesnât wait to find out.
âYou have any idea what was going through my head,â he bites, wiping furiously at his eyes. âI thought you were dead.â
He doesnât see the expression on your face, doesnât see how his words hit you right in the chest and shatter your heart. He misses the way you swallow the lump in your throat and he doesnât see your hands start to shake, but he feels them when they cup his cheeks. His shoulders slump at the contact, and then Santi just breaks.
âYou didnât fucking call, why didnât you fucking call?â
He chokes on a sob, coughing to try and rid himself of it but it doesnât work. He hides his face into his hands, shoulders shaking as he softly cries and heâs just happy that heâs able to keep himself quiet.
âOh sweet boy, come here.â
Santi letâs you pull him into your arms, he lets you comfort him in a way he didnât know he needed, in a way he never even imagined wanting.
And he lets himself feel all of that unwanted emotion, because he needs to get it the fuck out. He doesnât want to hold onto it like he does with his anger, he doesnât want it dancing in his veins. He never, ever wants to feel this way again.
Santiago is familiar with anger.
But heâs completely unfamiliar with the fear of losing you. Heâs not used to the nausea or the way his hands shake with panic, the way his chest feels like itâs going to collapse in on itself. Heâs not used to any of it, he doesnât know how to handle it.
He doesnât know what the fuck is wrong with him.
But at some point in the middle of the night, he looks up and he sees you, still holding him, still comforting him, and it suddenly hits. Suddenly, he understands.
Itâs you.
This is how youâve ruined him.
Youâve made him feel things heâs been pushing away for so long, things heâs tried so desperately to keep under lock and key where it can never hurt him.
Youâve stripped him of his control, his power. Youâve taken away his anger and youâve replaced the throbbing bruises on his knuckles, the smoke in his lungs and the blood that paints his vision.
He doesnât see red, he only sees you.
Santiago is familiar with you.
#santiago pope garcia#santiago garcia x reader#santiago pope garcia x reader#santiago garcia#triple frontier#triple frontier x reader#triple frontier fic
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I know we donât like j*hn w*lker... but I need bucky x reader with a side of bucky and walmart cap drama â like fake cap just constantly hitting on reader and bucky (or reader honesty) putting him in his place?
feel free to ignore this if it doesnât spark inspiration!!
jealousy, jealousy (bb imagine)
Summary: John Walker being gross to you and Bucky being pisses about it.
Word Count: 1.6k
âHe makes me sick,â Bucky gritted through his teeth, watching as Walker took your wrist and led you across the bar.
The team had needed more information from Madripoor, but since Bucky and Sam had already blown their covers quite recently, they had sent in you and Walker.
You two were pretending to be a well-known mafia couple: you had on a tight, revealing red dress and John had his gross hands all over you. He was clearly loving it. You were clearly not.
Bucky and Sam sat undercover in the corner of the bar as back-up if anything happened, meaning Bucky had a front row seat of watching Walker be more disgusting than usual.
You said something to the bartender with a laugh and Walker joined in with a short comment and more laughter, slinking his hand around your waist.
Even from across the room, Bucky knew you well enough to tell how you tensed the second his hand contacted your skin. Ever the actor, he was sure no one else could recognize it. But he did.
He balled his hands into fists, trying to use the pain and the pressure of its tightness to calm himself down.
âYou need to chill,â Sam muttered beside him, âI know you like Y/N but if you blow up, youâre going to get her killed. Walkerâs just doing his job.â
âHah,â Bucky barked out a bitter laugh, âYeah, and heâs loving it just a little too much.â
âLook, you think I like this anymore than you? I hate watching this shit, man. Y/Nâs like a sister to me. But suffering Walkerâs touch is better than a bullet wound from each gun in the building. Here,â he pushed his drink over to Bucky, âYou need this more than me.â
Bucky slid it back. He was not in the mood to drink. Even if alcohol had little effect on him anyway, he wanted to be stone cold sober as he watched Walker.
Walker took a casual look around the bar as he continued to make conversation with the bartender. His eyes fell on Buckyâs glare and he smirked.
As he continued speaking, his hand traveled down your backside to rest on your butt. The bartender couldnât see it, and even if they could, it would just be in line with your covers. But Walker knew what he was doing. When the bartender began responding, Walker gave a little wink back to Bucky as he squeezed your butt.
âIâm gonna kill him,â Bucky grit out, his Winter Soldier side coming fully alive.
Sam clamped a hand on Buckyâs arm, âDonât. You. Dare.â
âBut you see what heâs fucking doing! Heâs taking advantage of her!ââ¨âAnd heâs trying to piss off you! Anyone who comes within a mile of you and Y/N can tell youâre head over heels for her. Itâs a power move. Heâs trying to assert a position over us. And her.â
âOh, Iâm going to assert somethingâŚâ
âLike hell you are. Youâre going to sit here and wait for them to give the signal and then we leave.â
âAnd we leave Walker behind, bleeding to death in some alleyway.â
âBarnesââ
But Samâs words were interrupted, as you leaned down to readjust the straps of your heels: the signal that you had gotten the information you needed.
Walker grinned broadly with your ass on full display as you bent over. He gave it a little slap and made some joking remark to the bartender, who heartily agreed with him.
Bucky was seething. Thank fuck you guys were about to leave, because he was about to make another Winter Soldier scene in Madripor and kill everyone in eyesight.
You stood back up, gave Walker an intense look, and began strutting towards the door of the bar.
Walker took the last swig of his drink and set down cash on the bar before running off after you.
âWe should wait a while before we leave,â Sam instructed.
âAnd give Walker alone time with her? No fucking way.â Bucky stood up immediately and stalked out of the bar.
Sam sighed and finished his drink before following to make sure Bucky wasnât about to do something stupid.
By the time the boys had come outside and found you in the alleyway around the corner, Walker already had blood streaming down his cheek.
ââ if you EVER pull ANYTHING like that again I will leave you in a dumpster to rot, you fucking hear me?â
âCome on, baby, I know you have a crush on me. Youâre just scared of admitting it in front of Barnes, but I can tell with the looks you give me.ââ¨âThe looks of pure hatred? God, youâre fucking delusional.â
âSays the bitch whoâs pretending she doesnât like me.â
You opened your mouth to reply, but found Buckyâs metal hand wrapped around Walkerâs throat within a blink of an eye, âDo I need to shut you up or can I cut off your fucking hands first so you never touch a lady like that again?â
He landed a sharp punch to Walkerâs nose, âIf you even breathe in her direction againââ
âWhat?â Walker laughed through his bleeding nose, âYouâll kill me? Fuck, youâre angrier than she is. Gee, I wonder why that could beâŚ?â
Bucky grabbed Walker by his button up and threw him across the alleyway, slamming him against the brick wall.
âYouâre gonna make a scene,â Sam warned.
âItâs fucking worth it if I never see him again,â Bucky replied, stalking over to where Walkerâs body had fallen.
Walker groaned, but quickly picked himself up. Stupid super soldier serum.
He swung punches at Bucky but missed each one until Bucky grabbed one arm from the air and twisted it around him, âYou donât know what the fuck youâre talking about,â Bucky hissed in his ear.
âOh, I donât?â Walker smirked, âItâs pretty obvious, Buck. I mean, itâs one thing to find out that the Winter Soldier has feelings, itâs another to find out heâs a little puppy bitch for the girls he likes.â
This distraction allowed Walker to get a hit on Bucky, square in his jaw.
The shouting and the fighting was beginning to draw a crowd. Shit. Shit shit shit.
You ran in between the two men, prying them from each other.
âKnock it off!â You shouted, before muttering out of earshot of the spectators, âYouâre gonna fucking get us all killed. Letâs get back to the quinjet and you guys can kill each other there.â
The boys separated, but not without a few last hits each.
***
Bucky was wrapping his hand on his bed in the Tower when he heard a knock at the door.
âEnter,â he called, not looking up from his wounds.
When you said they could fight later, they hadnât taken that lightly. They had fought even harder than when he and Sam had taken the shield away from Walker the other week.
âHey,â you stepped inside.
Bucky immediately forgot about what he was doing, all attention on you, âHey.â
âHow ya holdinâ up?â You motioned to his first aid kit.
âIâll be fine in a day. Itâs really nothing.ââ¨You quirked an eyebrow, âYour forehead is split open.â
He let his fingers slide across the large gash that slid down his forehead and toward his temple. The bleeding had stopped at least.
âLike I said,â he continued with a calm smile, âIâll be fine.â
You shook your head and made your way over to sit beside him. You took the alcohol and a few cotton pads from the first aid kit, wetting them, âYou know, you didnât need to beat him up for me. I could do that on my own.â
You dabbed the cotton on his forehead cut, but he barely flinched at the pain. Guess he was used to pain, huh?â¨âI know,â he replied truthfully. He clearly had no doubt of that, âIt wasnât about defending you.ââ¨Your eyes slid from his cut down to meet his, âThen what was it about?â
Suddenly, you couldnât remember how to breathe normally anymore. You were so close to him, and he was looking up at you from under his lashes with those bright blue eyesâŚ
Until he wasnât. He looked down. âI donât know.â
âYou donât know?â You questioned, âBecause it sounded like Walker did.â
Buckyâs voice was hoarse as he spoke up, âWhat do you want me to say?â
âThe truth would be nice,â you teased lightly. But when he looked at you again, his gaze was anything but light.
You swallowed thickly.
âI mean, obviously I care about you, Y/N. Youâve been here for me for years. I donât like seeing someone take advantage of you. Especially like that.â
âIs that it?â
He hung his head, âI know what youâre trying to do here, doll, but donât make me say it. You deserve better than me. Someone like Sam or Steve. Itâs better like this.â
âFor who? Because it isnât for me.â You took his rough, flesh hand in yours, âBuck. Come on. Please.â
He closed his eyes and sighed, before just saying what heâd wanted to say for years now, âI love you, doll. Always have. I donât like seeinâââ
But you interrupted him with a kiss. He melted into it desperately, afraid this was the only one heâd ever get. The moment you started pulling away, he stopped, accepting the inevitable.
âI love you, too, dummy. You donât get to get away from me that easy.â
He blushed slightly, before speaking up, âThen can we do that again?â
You grinned and nodded, leaning back in to kiss him again. This time, he threaded a hand through your hair and pulled your jaw into him.
Okay. So maybe Walker was good for one thingâŚ
#possessive!bucky#posessive!bucky#avengers imagine#bucky barnes#bucky barnes imagine#bucky barnes x reader#marvel imagine#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes drabble#bucky barnes fanfic#my writing
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