#rue’s 2k

[heather-chandlers-weirder-cousin]

*wearing my projection glasses* wow, crazy how all my favorite characters are literally me

[kflixnet]

Check out our member Rue's oneshot!!

forgive me - wang yixiang

pairing: bf! nicholas x gn! Reader (ft. enhypen and mentions of euijoo)

genre: angst, fluff, romance, established relationship au, idol au

warnings: swearing (lots of it) fighting/argument, kiss scene at the end!!

Wc: 2.5k 

Summary: When you have had a really long, awful day at work, and so has Nicholas. So when a misunderstanding happens between you, you take a breather before you say something really outta pocket. However, despite Nicholas being the one in the wrong, he is still worried about where you could have ran off to. Nothing will calm his brain until he finds you.

author’s notes: ahh thank you so much for the request anon!! I slightly went off track with parts of this request so I hope that’s okay, and I hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing this!! This is one of my longest works I think I’ve ever written, and thank you so much to @wvnkoi @jisungsdaydreamer @odxrilove @liumoonlight and @uwuheeseungie for beta-reading this for me as I was writing it!! 

*bao bei = baby

**qin qin = dear one

Today was just not your day. You had a long and stressful day at work, where nothing seemed to go right all day, all starting from the morning. As soon as you stepped out of your apartment building that morning, it began raining heavily, already soaking you before you could reach for your umbrella in your bag. When you finally managed to get your umbrella up, a strong gust of wind blew seconds later, turning it inside out, and despite many efforts to fix it, the wind had ultimately broken your umbrella beyond repair.

As if the rest of your day could get any worse, you had managed to spill your coffee all over you, smash your phone screen, and your laptop had crashed twice; all by the time of your first meeting. The meeting, however, went great, but as soon as it finished, everything began going wrong again.

Firstly your car had a flat tire, meaning you had to get a taxi back to your apartment, as your boyfriend Nicholas wasn’t able to pick you up due to dance practice for his latest comeback. Then, when you phoned for a taxi, they told you it was going to be over an hour's wait for one to pick you up from work.

The final straw however just so happened to be deciding to take the bus home, sure, it dropped you off further away from your apartment building, but it was much quicker than the 45 minute walk in the still heavy rain. However, just as the bus stop was in sight, the bus sped past you - through a giant puddle, and straight past the bus stop. The bus that ran near to your apartment complex only ran once an hour, so at this point you would have been doomed to wait another hour, or just face the long walk home.

Ultimately, with the want to get home and just hide away from the world as quickly as possible, you decided to just face the long walk home in the downpour. Somehow the rain now matched your mood, contrary to this morning, as you walked the streets, no umbrella in sight due to the unfortunate events of this morning. It seemed that as you passed through the swarms of people that were scattered across the length of the sidewalk, they all seemed to be staring at you, somehow aware, and sympathetic of the events that had occurred to you that day.

Finally, having arrived at your apartment a whole hour after you left the office, you took your shoes off and rounded the corner into your bathroom. Immediately, you started up the shower before grabbing some warm, dry clothes, and turn on the heating in your apartment. Once the shower had reached its optimal temperature you migrated from the cold, tiled floor of your bathroom, into the shower cubicle.

You stood in the shower, the warm water cascading down into the drains, washing away the worries of the day. After thirty minutes had passed, you hopped out of the shower and got changed into your warm clothes that you had laid out on the bed. Nicholas wasn’t expected home for at least another three hours or so, therefore, you held off on doing the housework for a little bit whilst you continued to destress after the day. 

You flopped down, face first onto the sofa in the living room, and burrowed into the blanket that laid on the back of it. Anything to take your mind off the shit show that was today. You turned your head to face the television, and dragged your arm up and out the comfort of the blanket, to turn the tv on for any sort of background noise that would help turn your brain off. You came across a chinese drama on netflix, called hidden love, that piqued your interest. Eventually the distraction worked and you happened to fall asleep fifteen minutes into the second episode. 

You were rudely awakened by the sound of the front door slamming open, followed by a sweet call from your boyfriend, Nicholas. “Baobei, wo hui le!*” He called out to you sweetly. Shit. You thought, you hadn’t meant to fall asleep for so long. You hadn’t had the chance to do any of the house work you wanted to before he got back from dance practice. Hell, you hadn’t even made dinner yet, which was the plan you guys had discussed the day before. 

“Shit, qin qin** I’m so sorry. I fell asleep after I got home from work.  I didn’t have a chance to tidy up before you got home but I’ll go make dinner for us now.” you quickly rambled, still flustered and half asleep from your nap. 

“Fucks sake y/n, it’s not hard to just do one thing. It was the only thing I asked of you y/n, and it was to make dinner. Seriously.” Nicholas shouted at you, seriously startling you. It was unlike Nicholas to shout at you over something so small, but you could tell he must have had a hard day at practice. Even then though, it didn’t give him the right to scream at you over this. You decided to give it a one last attempt at resolving the issue, proposing ordering takeout for once, but yet again this was shot down by Nicholas’ incessant screaming. 

“Wang Yixiang! I will not have you screaming at me like this. I get that you’ve had a long, shitty day at work, but in case you haven't noticed, so have I. I got absolutely fucking drenched today as I left for work, then dropped my fucking phone because of some stupid idiot in the office, then my laptop crashed right before the most important meeting of my life, then turns out I had a flat tire as I was leaving work, couldn’t call for a taxi, and then missed the stupid fucking bus. Therefore I had to walk the fourty five minute journey home, in the fucking rain again cause my shitty umbrella broke this morning. So, excuse me for the fact that when I got home, I was trying to keep my shit together and forget about the day that I’ve endured, and the only way I could do that was having a fucking nap on the couch.” You screamed back at him. This was the first time you guys had had an argument like this, and you were just so frustrated by everything, that tears threatened to spill over the edge of your waterline.

“I’m only human, Nicho, and there’s only so much that I can take in one day. I’m sorry that I didn’t live up to my words, but shit happens. Please, don’t follow me, I’ll be back soon, I promise.” You spluttered out to him, turning your back to him, pulling on your worn out trainers and grabbing the first coat on the rack, before sliding out the front door. 

Luckily, you had your phone already in hand throughout the entire argument, which meant you could leave the toxic environment of the apartment quicker. You really didn’t want to say anything else that could hurt him, the words exchanged were already borderline hateful towards him but you were just so frustrated at the idea of his problems being the only problems in his world. Just thinking of how harsh you had been towards him, caused the tears to finally fall down your cheeks, as you headed towards your best friend, Heeseung’s dorms. Instead of surprising him at the door, in the unfortunate state you were already in, you decided it would only be proper to phone him and let him know of your intentions to crash at his for a couple hours before you felt stable enough to go back to Nicholas. 

You picked up your phone and began to dial Heeseung’s number. The call tone began to ring and ring, and at one point you thought it was going to get cut off. It wasn’t until you lost the hope of him picking up his phone that he answered you. 

“Hey, y/n. How are you doing, love*?” Heeseung asked you, his tone of voice as sweet as ever. In fact, the ever so sweet tone of your best friend, made you lose all sense of composure prior to him answering your call. 

“Seung…” was all you could manage to utter before you absolutely broke down in tears, thinking back over how harsh you had been towards your boyfriend. 

“Y/n, love. What’s up? Where are you? Are those cars I can hear?” He asked at a quick pace, with a worried undertone to his voice. He knew there was a reason that you called him crying and not your boyfriend, and as much as he wanted to know why that was, your safety was his top priority at that point. 

“Love, stay exactly where you are for me please, send me your location and I’ll be with you as soon as possible okay? I need to make sure you're safe,” Heeseung stammered out the instructions to you. In limited words, you agreed and quickly sent him your address, not wanting to be alone for much longer in the bitter winds. You were met by the end dial tone; assuming that Heeseung had received your location, you took a seat on the bench on the sidewalk. 

After ten minutes of waiting, you heard a couple voices shouting out for you in the pitch black of the night, it wasn’t until they got a little closer that you recognised the voices of Heeseung, Jake and Sunghoon calling out to find where you were. You shouted out their names, and the three of them ran straight over to you from different directions. As he arrived, Heeseung wrapped you tight into his chest, resting his head on top of yours. 

“Hey love, why are we crying? And, why are we in the middle of the streets when you have your own apartment, silly?” He asked whilst chuckling lightly. You could see over his shoulder Jake and Sunghoon bickering over something stupid, probably who found you or who got to you first out of them. Seeing the pair of them made you let out a little giggle, which in turn, caused Heeseung to turn around and see them. “Really boys, for god’s sake!” 

Heeseung dragged you back over to the bench that you sat on whilst waiting for the boys to come and again asked you what had happened. “Nicho and I, we had a massive argument when he got home today. Like we both were screaming at each other over stupid stuff, but I just couldn’t stay there in case I took it too far. Like I get that he’d had a really tough day at practice but at the same time I had an awful day at work, and he just had to pick an argument with me, all because I’d had a nap on the couch instead of doing some housework, and preparing dinner like I’d told him, I would,” you rambled to the boys about everything that had happened and why you walked out on Nicholas and left him in your apartment. 

In your peripheral vision, you saw Jake pull his phone out from his pocket upon hearing what had happened, but thought nothing of it. Maybe he was just telling the other boys where they were, or maybe he was telling Nicholas or Euijoo that you were safe, and with them. You owed your life to the three boys who sat with you, who endured the bitter winds in the pitch black streets just to make sure you were safe and calm. The boys meant so much to you, in ways they would never understand. 

After a few moments of silence, you heard another couple of voices shouting out for you, seemingly coming from the total opposite direction to where the three boys sitting with you had come from. The two voices you could hear were quickly recognised by your brain, as that of your boyfriend Nicholas, and his best friend Euijoo. You guessed that Nicholas had called Euijoo telling him exactly what happened and how he had messed up, big time, and that Euijoo had offered to help him find you before it got too late or you got sick. 

Euijoo reached you before Nicholas, and wrapped you in a tight hug similar to that of Heeseung when he first found you. Over the shoulder of Euijoo however, you could see your ever so loving boyfriend Nicholas, his cheeks glimmering slightly under the streetlights as he hung back away from you all. It was evident that he was crying, and the way he hung his head showed just how much he regretted the events of the night. You lightly tapped Euijoo on the back as a signal to release you from the hug he held you in, and headed over to Nicholas. As you reached where he stood, he must have seen your shadow on the ground as he slowly lifted his head up, eyes stained red and swollen, a clear indicator that the emotional distress was shared between the pair of you. You slowly lifted your hand up to rest on his cheek, as he looked at you through his sticky wet eyelashes, wiping away the painful tears that slipped out. 

A moment of silence was shared between the two of you, before Nicholas pulled you close into his unyielding grip, not letting you go, as he rested his head on the top of your shoulder, exhausted. The whimpers in your ear heartbreaking as you recognised just how much pain he was in, your hand reached up to rest on the back of his head stroking it as a sign of silent reassurance that everything was fine.  

“Qin qin, everything’s okay darling. I’m sorry for the way I spoke to you early, it was out of line and I’m really really sorry. I love you, please never forget that,” you murmured an apology out to the love of your life, feeling utterly guilty about everything.

“Bao bei, please never apologise for something like this. I was the one who was in the wrong, I am so ashamed of how I spoke to you earlier today, and for not taking into consideration everything you do for me on a day to day basis. Please forgive me, I know it's not an excuse but everything just went awful for me today and I just missed your food so much that I…” You cut Nicholas off, by trying to pull his head up from your shoulder, him giving you a look of confusion before trying to continue his apology. “I just…” You smashed your lips against his, maybe it was a little rough at first, but it was overflowing with both positive, and negative emotions which seemed to dissipate just as the anger and upset of the night had. 

It was almost like a mutual promise between the both of you to forgive and forget the events of the night.

status: open 

@bambisgirl @enhacolor @acaiasahi @duolingofanaccount @slytherinshua @redm4ri @enluv @jaelaxies

[xanasaurusrex]

hi, i love how you write, could you please write some clarisse x daughter of hephaestus drabble? like some love triangle kind hephaestus, aphrodite and ares, but the sapphic version with ares and hephaestus, please ♡

clarisse and hephaestus!daughter hiding their relationship clarisse la rue x hephaestus!daughter!reader a/n: hi!! thank you sm for reading my other stuff, and yes ofc! so this was originally meant to be a drabble, but as you can see from the word count i got carried away. i had an idea and then i just kept writing it, and i couldn't stop. honestly clarisse x hephaestus!daughter is a favorite pairing of mine i love ares children with hephaestus children! ok thanks sm for requesting, i hope i did your request justice! warnings: enemies to lovers, weird transition from enemies to lovers, making out, mentions of getting stabbed, mention of weapons, secret relationship wc: 2k+

a child of ares and a child of hephaestus getting together isn't impossible, and also definitely not unheard of, but it's also definitely not common.

ares kids and hephaestus kids have a sort of natural rivalry that they're sort of inducted into from the second they're claimed.

since hephaestus is married to aphrodite, and yet aphrodite is having a longstanding affair with ares, hephaestus kids tend to not trust ares kids very much.

that was how it was for clarisse and y/n for quite a while.

their relationship was as hostile as any other relationship between a hephaestus kid and an ares kid, but they just felt drawn to each other. there was just something there that they couldn't deny.

everything changed the day they first kissed. they had gotten into an argument after clarisse claimed that the armor that y/n had made for her was faulty.

y/n claimed this was 100% untrue, because she had made it herself, and she didn't half-ass armor making.

it was late in the day, early evening. y/n had finished her dinner early, since there was a sword that she had to have finished within the next two days, the production of which she was still very behind on.

clarisse had caught up with her and cornered her in the forge, and started making the angry accusations.

"the straps are loose, and the whole thing almost fell off me while i was getting stabbed at. i call that faulty, y/n," clarisse sneered.

y/n scowled at clarisse. "then you must've knocked them loose or something, because i know for a fact that i fastened on those straps myself, and they were not loose," there was a fierceness in her voice that would've made anyone else fall back, but only made clarisse get further in her face.

"they were loose, and i almost died because of it!" clarisse snapped back.

y/n rolled her eyes as she went to put her mallet back from pounding down on the metal to create the sword shape. "come on, clarisse, stop being so dramatic. you were in the sword practice area, you wouldn't have died,"

"you don't know that!"

"yes i do!"

the two paused their arguing and stared at each other. there had always been something electric between the two of them, that was something nobody was able to deny, not even the two of them.

after a few seconds of the stare down, clarisse surged forward, her feet stomping loudly on the ground of the forge as she pushed y/n up against the wall. her nostrils were flaring, and her eyes were full of fire.

and as much as she hated it, clarisse couldn't help but look down at y/n's lips.

they looked so deliciously kissable, and yet they were pulled into a sneer at clarisse. she did everything she could to banish the temptation to kiss y/n right now, because that was so not what was going to happen.

"get... off me," y/n breathed out, panting heavily. her teeth were clenched, and her eyes closed tightly, as if warding off unwelcome thoughts.

clarisse could understand the feeling.

clarisse didn't move. the two of them stayed where they were, eyes flicking between their lips and back up to the other's eyes.

eventually y/n closed her eyes again, tigher this time, saying, "clarisse, you need to get off me and leave or something is going to happen,"

clarisse stayed where she was.

the two of them continued to stare at each other for a few seconds, their breaths speeding up and hitting each other in the face, hot and harsh.

everything changed within the span of about two seconds.

surprisingly, it was y/n who surged forward first, her hands grabbing onto clarisse's face and pulling it close to hers, their lips making contact.

the second their lips touched, they both knew that their relationship would never be the same again. they weren't exactly sure how, because there was a good chance that they would just act like this never happened.

but right there, in the moment, they wanted to enjoy it as much as they could.

clarisse's hands found themselves snaking around y/n's waist, holding her tight and pulling the two of them closer together. y/n moved her hands from cradling clarisse's face to wrapping her arms around her neck.

the air in the camp forge felt hotter than y/n had ever experienced it being, and she knew it had nothing to do with the fires raging in the hearths, and much more to do with the daughter of ares, who was currently pressed up against her, kissing her with so much fervor it was making her dizzy.

they both pulled away for a millisecond with the intention of getting some air before going back in, both of them feeling hungry for the other, when of course, an interruption struck.

"y/n!" a voice called from the distance.

they both shoved away from each other dramatically, y/n accidentally banging her hip as she tried to jump backwards, unaware that she was as far back as she could go. they made eye contact for a few more seconds, staring into each other's eyes with the kind of intensity that would even make the gods quiver.

"y/n!" the voice called out again, causing y/n to avert her eyes from clarisse, being worried that if she looked at her for even a second more, she wouldn't be able to look away.

when the voice finally entered the forge, it was revealed to be one of her siblings, looking for her for advice on something to do with a weapon they made.

when y/n's brother entered the forge, he could immediately feel the tension in the space. he shrank unto himself, noticing that clarisse, the widely known volatile daughter of ares, and his older sister, who had a rather funny look on her face. come to think of it, clarisse had the same funny look on her face. like they'd been caught doing something they shouldn't have, but that couldn't be. he couldn't even fathom a thing they would be doing together that would be wrong.

he then saw clarisse's caught expression morph into one of anger. she snapped to get y/n's attention, before saying with as much conviction as she could muster, "just make sure the next armor isn't faulty. i would prefer not to die, and even if i did, i'm sure you don't want it to be your fault,"

and even though this was clarisse who was talking, there was less conviction in her voice than she had hoped. in fact, it almost sounded a little weak. like she was out of breath. which she most definitely was not. no way did a simple kiss rob her of her breath.

(it most definitely did)

y/n stumbled through walking her younger brother through what he had asked, only half focusing on his questions and giving half-thought out answers. she knew she was going to regret that when he tried to forge whatever it was he was wanting to create the next day, but at the moment, y/n couldn't find it in herself to care.

she had just kissed clarisse la rue, and she was sure it had been the best kiss of her life. granted, there hadn't been many, but she couldn't imagine another kiss topping the one she had just experienced.

there was only one problem.

the best kiss of her life had been with... who it had been with.

the next week was particularly awkward between the two. the usual animosity that had come to be expected at camp half blood between an ares child and a hephaestus child was absent between the two, and instead they avoided each other at all costs.

y/n spent most of her time in the forge, crafting anything but the specific style of armor that she knew clarisse favored, and instead found herself self-consciously forging beautiful spears that, despite the expert craftsmanship, she knew would never rival the spear that clarisse's father had given her.

her siblings were becoming increasingly worried about her, since she hardly ever left the forge. when she did, she seemed preoccupied, and irritated about something. they had asked what was going on, but she had refused to disclose anything.

similarly, clarisse was doing everything she could to keep y/n out of her head as well.

she hardly ever left the training fields. she was singing dummies with her magical spear left and right, day and night. specifically the first day after the kiss, people would see clarisse violently taking down whole fleets of dummies within seconds, and were hesitant to train that particular day.

clarisse took more breaks than y/n did, mostly because she wasn't able to spend every waking moment at the training areas, partially because her body wouldn't allow it, and also the harpies that patrolled the camp at night weren't particularly fond of it. if clarisse had the energy to fight them off, she might've attempted it, but considering she spent most of her days training her body in an attempt to train her mind away from thinking about y/n, all that she could really do was sleep.

over time, though, the two of them were forced together in certain situations.

since they were both the heads of their respective cabins, whenever the counselors of each cabin were needed, they needed to be in the same room, and they had to be accustomed to that.

they were also shoved together quite a lot when their campers got into tousles, which happened quite often considering the animosity that was practically drilled into their heads from the second they were claimed and put in their right cabins.

to say that their relationship was complicated would be a gross understatement.

there was something that drew the two together, often finding themselves in situations that could rarely be explained.

like the time about a month after the forge incident (that neither of them had told anyone about) when they both went to the bathroom at the same time unknowingly, and found themselves mere centimeters from each other.

"do you ever think about it?" clarisse asked. it occurred to her that she had no memory of getting this close to y/n, but she wasn't really complaining.

before the kiss they at least interacted. it was mostly negative, with the two yelling at each other or complaining about the other for whatever reason, but they were near each other quite often due to this. after the kiss, and after the two started avoiding each other like a damn hellhound, that clarisse was really missing her company.

she was starting to think that maybe she had only ever bickered with y/n to get the scraps of her attention that she was desperate for.

there were times when this sounded like a completely logical explanation, and there were also times when clarisse had this thought and she forced herself to banish it, telling herself that she didn't need y/n's attention. why would she? they had never been friends, had never even really been acquaintances.

and yet, throughout a lot of clarisse's life, y/n had been one of the only constants.

the first day clarisse showed up at camp half blood, she was there, welcoming her. though clarisse had been rather hostile to her that day, which now that she thinks about it, may have been what caused their more intense rivalry, y/n still insisted on showing her around the camp, showing her all of her personal favorite spots.

"think about what?" the sound of y/n's voice broke clarisse from her trance, and brought her back to the present.

clarisse blinked once, and then y/n was in focus again. clarisse sharply inhaled at really seeing y/n up close, seeing all the intricate details of her face.

she was sure she had never seen anything so beautiful.

"the kiss," clarisse clarified. her fingers, as if with a mind of their own, began seeking out y/n's fingers. "because i do," she murmured. the tips of their pointer fingers touched, and it was as if electricity zinged up their spines. "i don't really want to," clarisse admitted, her head turning to the side as she did everything she could to avoid looking y/n in the eyes. "but i do. i can't help it."

y/n cleared her throat, utterly shocked at clarisse's admission "sometimes... sometimes i think about it, too," she confessed. "o-occasionally,"

the two were silent for a few seconds, before clarisse finally gathered up the courage to look y/n in the eye again. the eye contact was searing, and intense, and before they knew it, the two were leaning closer to each other.

there was no denying it anymore, since they had both admitted it.

they didn't know what happened, when it happened, or even why it happened, but there was something between them. something that was magnetic and uncontrollable... and somewhat addicting.

they were milliseconds away from kissing. their lips were just barely grazing, when the sound of voices startled the two apart.

as electric as the two of them felt around each other, they both knew that this was the sort of situation they didn't want to be caught in.

this need to not be caught like this was only furthered when it was a group of aphrodite girls that walked into the bathroom, looking at the two of them curiously, instantly clocking how close the two were standing. they obviously noted the taut tension in the room, and clarisse and y/n watched as the girls' eyes flitted between the two of them, their previous conversation having come to a halt.

clarisse, so fast y/n wasn't sure she hadn't just disappeared into thin air, turned around and slammed the stall door behind her, locking it with a heavy click.

y/n was left there with a shocked expression on her face, staring at the aphrodite girls, looking a lot like a deer caught in headlights.

she hesitated for only a second more before pushing past them and leaving the bathroom all together. she felt slightly guilty about leaving clarisse in there, but she was the one who had abandoned her first, so she didn't feel too bad about it.

after this, everything changed for clarisse and y/n.

they started meeting up in secret to spend time with each other away from camp. this spending time with each other consisted of talking together, laughing together, and yes... kissing.

it took a while for them to become official, but when they did, they both found themselves happier than they had been in a while.

it was noticeable, too. almost everyone at camp, chiron and mr. d included, that the two were acting... happier.

there was just something in the air around the two of them. whenever they were close to each other, it felt like the air became electric. no one could really place what was happening, since y/n. and clarisse had decided to keep their relationship a secret... at least for the start.

it was a complicated decision they made. people often forget that camp half blood is a large collection of teenagers. and teenagers like to gossip.

it's not exactly uncommon for two demigods to get together, and then everyone has something to say about it, which puts a strain on the new relationship.

it was y/n who suggested the idea.

"i just think... i want to enjoy this," she said while twirling a strand of clarisse's hair around her finger. she adjusted herself where her back was leaned against the rough bark of the tree in the woods at camp. clarisse was laying down as well, with her head in y/n's lap. "i mean, you've seen what happens. everybody has their own opinion, and then they get into fights and then they break up," y/n took a deep breath. "i really don't want that to happen to us,"

clarisse was quiet for a minute, her eyes flitting around at the trees and leaves and branches above her head. "okay," she said. "i don't want that to happen to us either. i want to enjoy us," she said.

y/n smiled, leaning down to give her a kiss on the forehead. she started to lean back up, but clarisse kept hold of her cheeks and pulled her down for a kiss on the lips. they both smiled into it, giggling slightly, enjoying being the teenage girls that they are.

so there they sat, enjoying each other's presence. enjoying being in love, although they hadn't said those three large words quite yet, but they would before long.

because the gods knew that these two were hopelessly in love with each other, and were going to be together for quite a while.

[aphroditesmoon]

Hi!! Same person who requested the Hades oneshot lol! I loved it alot and I know it's like super early to request another but I wanna get this out before I forget ^^. Okay so what about a Fem!Reader who is a mermaid or siren. Poseidons daughter, who is usually aggressive to anyone who enters her waters but Clarisse somehow is dating her, reader only has a soft spot for clarisse so when they need to cross her waters during capture the flag only clarisse can convince her ^^.(also reader often adopts random fish and clarisse is always swarmed with them when in her pond/waters.) Thank you!!

love letters from the sea to the shore

clarisse la rue x fem!siren!reader

warnings: reader doesn't like demigods, possibly ooc clarisse.

wc: 2k

a/n: i hope u like this🩷🎀

If there's one thing you hate more than demigods is their little capture the flag game. You view these half breeds as unresponsible, mischievous, and disrespectful beings.

You never saw the appeal in gods mingling with mortals and making children with them when they are so many other creatures they could be with.

Your father have tasked you into protecting the waters, and that is who you are. Lady of the lake, guardian of the sea.

The job isn't exactly glamorous, it have been more than a few time that you have caught some sneaky, filthy demigods canoodling in the waters, making out or doing worse.

Your ways into scaring them to leave have gotten less and less subtle as the years pass by and more aggressive. A few weeks ago, you had come close into strangling a kid from the Hermes cabin who had thrown his empty Snickers wrapper into the sea. You were deeply reprimanded by Chiron that same day.

You never see the boy near the waters anymore since that event.

But today...today is different. Every year, the demigods participate in the game of Capture the flag, and though every year they would try and use different routes and strategies, passing through the waters is always necessary. Which meant that whether you liked it or not, the demigods would pollute your waters anyways.

"I'm not going in." You could hear the kids argue among themselves. "Last time someone did, they got jumped by that thing."

"Mermaids don't jump, dumbass." His brother countered, only to be corrected by a familiar voice; "She's not a mermaid, she's a siren, and we don't have a choice."

Both of them were right. You would try and scare anyone who dares enter in, but you would let them in sooner or later. Even though you knew that rules must be abided.

"Move aside, I'll talk to her." Clarisse spoke again.

You weren't that close to land, but swam up nearer when you heard her approaching your territory. "Hey-hello?", she called out as her feet steps into the water.

"Lady...protector, I ask permission to speak to you." The daughter of Ares spoke as if she was unfamiliar with you, and either it was because her siblings were there or because she still considers the concept of your relationship a strange anonymity.

You knew who Clarisse was, you first met her 2 years ago. You wish you could say that she's different from the other obnoxious children, but she isn't.

The girl is as foolish as she is brave. She did not believe in other's warning to tread carefully around the waters, and so when you appeared despite her doubt that you would, she ran off in fear just like all the kids before her.

But a day after that, she came back.

She sat by the edge of dry land and waited for you to appear. And when you did, the same anxiety you've seen on many people's faces before was etched on hers.

But she did not run off that time, instead she gave you an apology, and a gift. A string bracelet made of tiny seashells. An offering, she called it. As if you were one of the gods.

You told her to stop collecting seashells, but thanked her for it anyway.

Since that day, she would come down ny the water more often, not too much that it'll annoy you, but enough times for you to grow a liking for her.

Some nights, when you're in a good mood, you'd even let her meet your sea creature friends. Not a lot of people manage to get close enough to not scare the fishes and crabs.

You are not in a good mood today.

Small waves were sent back up as a response to Clarisse, but it seemed that she needed more. "We need to cross the water." She informed, straight to the point.

She knew you wouldn't be answering her verbally, it isn't like you to appear in broad daylight. You kept the waves coming to indicate your presence and waited for her to speak again.

"Let us pass quickly, and we won't bother you for the whole year again." Clarisse attempted to bargain.

The truth was, she didn't need to ask you at all and you would've still let her pass. But she didn't know that and neither does her siblings, so you act as if you're still contemplating her deal. A few minutes later, the waves slowed down until they completely stopped, a finalised decision has been made.

"Is that a no?" Her brother asked. They couldn't read you like they could.

"Just get in the water." Clarisse instructed with an annoyed sighh as she lead the way, letting the waters surround her legs. That was another thing you had in common with her, you both agree that everyo e else in camp is insufferable.

You watched them waddle their way through from below, hidden from the side of the sea until eventually, they crossed over to dry land, getting closer and closer to the flag.

No one else tried to enter the waters again for the rest of the day. And 20 minutes after you had granted Clarisse safe passage, you could hear the cheers coming from the red coloured team.

---

As midnight approaches the hour, a rare sight comes into view around your space.

Fireflies dances above the large body of water, glowing over the places where the moonlight couldn't.

It's time like this where the most glorious parts of nature would come out of their hiding, the quiet is inviting. And the peace, comforting.

This has been your life since you could remember. And you were content with it. Despite your mother merely being a siren, your father acknowledged you and gave you responsibilities that he'd only give to people he trusted. The creatures of the water and the trees are your friends, a distraction for boredom and repetition.

And though you've had no problem repeating the same cycle of routine daily, you only knew what yearning meant after you met Clarisse La Rue.

Before her, you never knew what it felt like to wake up waiting on the best part of the day. You never knew what loneliness had meant up until you met her.

Only after Clarisse, did you realize empty and unfulfilling your life had really been. To be so good at what you're doing and yet, not having anyone who notices it or to care for you the way you've been caring for the sea and rivers.

But the thing with Clarisse is you never know when she's gonna come. It's impossible for her to visit you ever night, what with Chiron's guarding. And she had her own life apart from you.

Your infatuation with her soon lessened moderately when you realized just how ridiculous it is for you to assume that she views you as more than anything but a fascinating mythical creature, but your liking for her never truly leaves you.

You were not expecting her tonight, knowing full well how taxing and tiring their little game was. The children would all sleep like babies tonight.

And yet, from where you're sat, back leaning against a boulder, you hear her footsteps entering your grounds.

You tilt your head slightly, sneaking a glance at her before you turn back to your front, watching the fireflies disappear and the fishes lurking near your feet.

You felt her presence behind you and said nothing. It isn't uncommon for you to be silent around her, after all there is a risk of you accidentally affecting her with your voice.

You only turned to her when she knelt down to your left. Her face is shadowed by the darkness, without the fireflies, it was harder to see things.

"Hey." She greeted in a hushed tone. You stare at her quietly, responding to her in your mind. "I wanted to see you tonight, to thank you." Clarisse explained.

Her team had won, thanks to your cooperation. You offered her a small smile, something that is rare even between the two of you. Clarisse grinned back, encouraged by your positive attitude.

"I know how much you hate it when there's people over. You didn't have to let us cross, but you did."

You did have to let her cross, there are rules even you had to follow. But she didn't need to know that. Plus, if it were anyone else, you would've made it harder for them to cross.

The tiny goldfishes are surrounding your lower half that's still soaked inside the water, as if guiding you back under, you ignore them as your eyes remain on Clarisse. She looked beautiful like this, with her hair down and sleepy eyes that only you have the privilege to see before the sun rises.

She was pulling something out of her pocket suddenly and fixing her sitting position."I also got you something, a gift."

You had expected this. Clarisse often came to you with little gifts. Flowers, shiny rocks, dead butterflies.

Her hands are wrapped around the item strategically to hide it from you. If she was trying to get you excited, it's working. You push your neck out to try and get a peak on it, but it's gripped closely.

Clarisse pushes her hands outband slowly opened up her palms to you, exposing a circular bracelet, covered in a bright yellow colour.

"Gold." You noted aloud and looked up at her. "It is. Do you like it?" She asks, smiling.

You nod your head once and extend your wrist to her.

Clarisse easily puts it on over your hand, the size fitting perfectly. You wondered if this notion have somehow changed something in your relationship, but didn't know how to ask.

"I had someone from the Hephaestus cabin to make this for you. I wanted it to mean something...not just for you, but for me too." She had said it all so well, your heart skipped a beat over her words.

Clarisse probably didn't know, but for your species, gifting and offerings are usually considered as courting methods. And so you found it genuinely amusing how easy it is for her to be going around, getting you stuff unprompted.

You also had a gift for her. Something you've been keeping to yourself for months, contemplating on whether or not you should actually give it to her.

But it's been sitting down deep in the water, safely waiting to be retrieved.

And so without saying anything, you moved away from her and dived into the waters. You made sure to be quick, swiftly reaching for the closed shell into your palms.

And as you make your way back up onto the shores, you see that Clarisse is thankfully, still waiting.

Your fingers found hers as you tried to climb back up onto dry land. She does not hesitate to wrap her long arms under your elbow, pulling you up towards her.

Once you're seated next to her again, you nudged the shell onto her hand and waited for her to open it. Clarisse cracked open the pouch and opened her mouth to let out a soft breathy sigh at the sight of a singular white pearl that sat inside of it.

"Are you...giving this to me?" She asks, turning her head towards you. You nodded as a yes.

"You know, I think this would make a decent ring." She tells you, thumbing the stone. You raise your hand up to lightly graze over her collarbones. "You think I should make it a necklace?"

You nod again. Clarisse seemed pleased at how engaging you've been throughout this whole meeting, trying her best to coax a conversation out of you.

There are so many things you want to tell her of. Things you aren't ready to tell her yet. And so for now, whatever this is would have to be enough.

Clarisse shoves the pearl into her back pocket after. “Thank you.” She says gratefully. The silence was no longer excruciating nor suffocating. Instead it is loud in unsaid confessions and comfort in understanding.

[persevereforahappyending]

Maybe in Another Life |13|

Pairing: Clarisse La Rue x Hunter of Artemis!Reader

Summary: You are a Hunter of Artemis, but you start to question what you truly want when you meet Clarisse and get to know her.

Warnings: Slight Battle of the Labyrinth Spoilers

Word Count: 2k+

Main Masterlist | Series Masterlist

ch. 1 | ch. 2 | ch. 3 | ch. 4 | ch. 5 | ch. 6 | ch. 7 | ch. 8 | ch. 9 | ch. 10 | ch. 11 | ch. 12 | ch. 13 | ch. 14 | ch. 15 | ch. 16 | ch. 17

“Where are you now?” Clarisse asked.

You took your eyes off the iris message, looking around at your surroundings. The Hunters had set up camp in the mountains. It was fall but still pretty warm, the leaves were all various shades of red and orange as they prepared to fall off their trees. There was a small waterfall flowing into a stream, that the native animals drank from. The sun was just beginning to set, so there was still enough light for Clarisse to see a bit of where you were.

“I’m not even sure which state,” you admitted. “The mountains and more south then north.”

“How’s it going?”

You shrugged. “The usual. We get a lead and then it runs dry. What about you, how are things there?”

You hadn’t seen Clarisse since you left her house after the labyrinth, which was at least six months ago. You still talked to her every week though, you actually seemed to talk to her more than you had been before.

“Good,” Clarisse said, nodding and smiling to herself. “Chris has been good.” Your mouth twitched, wanting to frown but you managed to keep your face as neutral as possible. “We’re actually about to go to the bonfire soon. Silena will not let me hear the end of it if I’m late again.”

Chiron ended up not being able to help Chris. They took him back to camp and after Percy and Annabeth had their adventure in the labyrinth Mr. D had returned to camp and cured Chris’s madness. He went ran into king Minos in the maze who was the one that caused him to go mad.

“That’s great,” you said, forcing a smile. “I’m glad he’s doing better and tell Silena I say hi.”

“Will do.” She had a soft smile on her face, something she seemed too only have around you. “Bye.”

“Bye,” you smiled before waving your hand through mist, ending the message.

You wanted Clarisse to be happy, even if that was with Chris. It’s not like you could ever be with her, you weren’t leaving the Hunters, and you had no right to hold her back from falling for someone else, you had no right to be mad at her. You were friends, you were the one that drew that line. None of that meant that it still didn’t hurt to see her getting along with someone else. You didn’t know when you’d see her again but listening to her talk about how Chris was doing was enough to tell you how happy she was.

“How’s it going?” Thalia asked as she walked up to stand beside you.

“It’s fine,” you said, giving her a little shrug. “Clarisse said Chris is doing better.” Thalia let out a little hum, you weren’t sure what it meant though.

“Annabeth says he’s been a great help with preparations for Luke.”

“He probably knows by now that Chris is back at camp.” You didn’t take your eyes off the horizon, watching as the sun slowly began to disappear behind the trees. “He had to have changed course.”

Thalia nodded. “Probably a little,” she admitted. It would be stupid and crazy for Luke to continue with his plan when Chris wasn’t on his side anymore. Even without Kronos guiding him Luke wasn’t stupid. “At the time though, his big plan was using the labyrinth which he’s already done.”

You nodded, that was true, Chris was one of the ones sent into the maze to figure a way through it. That was Chris’s main mission before he went crazy. “Attacking the camp was just a step,” you said. “War is coming.”

Thalia nodded. “Annabeth is about to call, care to join?”

You shrugged. You had been around for some of the calls with Annabeth, but you were usually off on your own or talking to Clarisse at the same time. Thalia and Annabeth went over a lot of plans and went over new developments if anyone has seen or heard from Luke, but otherwise there was no reason for you to join a call. More times than not the call started out talking about battle plans and then turned into two friends just catching up.

“Hey!” Annabeth greeted when her face appeared through the mist in front of you. “Oh, Y/N, hey!”

“Hey,” you said, giving her an awkward wave. “Hope you don’t mind, Thalia asked me to join.”

“No, no, of course. How have you been?”

“Good, just got off a call with Clarisse.”

Annabeth let out a little hum, flicking her eyes to Thalia for a second before back to you. “How’s she doing?”

You scrunched your eyebrows at that question. “Wouldn’t you know better? She’s at camp with you every day.” You knew Annabeth and Clarisse weren’t necessarily friends, but they had gotten closer when working on the labyrinth mission together and Clarisse was a head councilor, she always told you about councilor meetings and how annoying everyone was being or if they discussed anything serious.

“Well, yeah, but…” Annabeth shrugged. “She doesn’t really talk to anyone here.”

You furrowed your brow, you knew that wasn’t true, she talked about doing stuff with Silena all the time, she mentioned Chris more than once, much to your dismay, and she mentioned yelling at her siblings. “What are you talking about? She literally just told me she was going to the bonfire tonight.”

“Well, yeah,” Annabeth shrugged. “She might make casual conversation with select people.” You nodded, that sounded right, Clarisse wasn’t going around talking to just anyone. “But she doesn’t actually talk to anyone. Not about the labyrinth.” You looked down at the ground, the two of you talked about it occasionally, you figured she’d talk to the others about what happened. “She warned me and Percy and that was about it, she hasn’t talked about what happened down there.”

“Not even with Chris?” based on the glance Thalia gave you, you were sure you didn’t do a good job at hiding the bitterness in your voice. With how much time Clarisse had been spending with Chris you figured she was talking to him; she had been updating you on his condition every call until Mr. D healed him, even after that she still updated you on how he was integrating back into camp.

Annabeth shook her head. “She’s been helping him, but they don’t talk about that. Chris mostly talks to Chiron or even me and Percy.” You gave a small nod, you figured Clarisse had been spending her days training her siblings and hanging out with Chris, first helping him recover, and then just getting closer with him.

“The only one she really talks to is you,” Annabeth said. Your head snapped up; your eyes wide as you stared at Annabeth. “I haven’t seen her act that way in a while, except with you.”

You furrowed your brow. “She hasn’t acted any different?” Some of your conversations got a little more somber but Clarisse herself hadn’t changed, you still talked just as you had before.

“Exactly,” Annabeth smiled. She was giving you this look like that explained it all, like you were supposed to get something. “She’s not like that with anyone else.”

Your eyes found the ground again, you weren’t sure how long you stood there taking in Annabeth’s words. When you looked up you saw Annabeth and Thalia, both watching you, making you quickly clear your throat. “I’m going to…” you pointed back towards the camp and quickly turned on your heel.

You quickly made your way back to camp, taking a seat on a log next to the fire. Only a few of your sisters were still seated around it, some were already asleep, some were off somewhere else talking, and some were patrolling the perimeter. You hadn’t even been seated for a minute before the other Hunters got up and walked away from the fire without a word. You furrowed your brow; you knew you had been distant lately, but you didn’t think you were that bad of company. Your confusion was answered though when you left Artemis sit down next to you.

“You’ve been talking to that girl, Clarisse, a lot,” Artemis said.

You glanced at her out of the side of your eye, there were still times, like this time, when it felt strange to hear Artemis sound so serious, especially when she looked like a twelve-year-old. You had been with her for a thousand years and you didn’t have a problem with taking orders from your goddess, but there were certain times she got serious, and the subject sounded weird coming out of a twelve-year-olds mouth.

“She’s a friend,” you said, staring into the fire. If you turned to look at Artemis you knew she’d see right through you, see that you had feelings that went beyond friendship for Clarisse.

“You don’t make friends often.”

You chuckled. “I’ll have you know I think I’m quite likeable.”

“It takes awhile to warm up to you.”

You chuckled a little louder, shaking your head. That was fair, you tended to come off in not the best light upon first meetings. “I beat her in capture the flag. She was not happy,” you smiled at the memory.

You could feel Artemis’s eyes on you, but you couldn’t hide how happy the memory made you. “I bet a child of Ares took that well.”

You smirked, giving a little shrug. “She’s easy to annoy, you know how much I like that.” You turned your head, finally looking at her only to give her a knowing smirk.

“Yes,” she sighed. “I am more than aware how annoying you can be.”

You lightly chuckled but your smile slowly faded as the memories from camp continued to play through your mind. “We sparred for the first time after Zoe left on the quest,” you whispered. “She could keep up with me, not that she ever beat me.” You caught a small smile on Artemis’s lips. You were a daughter of Nike; you couldn’t let anyone even consider you’d lose.

“You’ve been different since you got back from the labyrinth,” Artemis said softly.

You knew she was testing the waters, seeing how willing you’d be to talk, how much you’d give her. “I almost died,” you whispered.

“There was some sort of monster, it had me,” you said, gesturing with your hands. “It had me, but then…” you let out a humorless chuckle. “Clarisse sacrificed her spear, her pride and joy, to save me. I owe her my life.”

“You care for her,” Artemis concluded, straightening her back.

“Yes,” you said instantly, staring Artemis in the eyes. You knew it was a risk, but you would not lie to your goddess.

“You were sent to pick up supplies but wandered off to help her with a mission.” You swallowed nervously. “Who are you loyal to?”

“You,” you said without hesitation.

“And if you had to sacrifice yourself?”

“Without hesitation.”

“If you had to choose between your sisters or your friend?”

You opened your mouth, but nothing came out. That was the first time you ever hesitated on that question. The truth was, if it came down to saving one of your sisters or saving Clarisse, you’d be conflicted. Either choice, you didn’t think you could live with yourself. You could tell by the slight tilt of Artemis’s head that she suspected this, she knew you’d hesitate on this question.

“I am a Hunter,” you said, your voice was quiet, but you refused to let it waver. “I am loyal to you, to Thalia, and to the rest of our sisters, first, above anyone or anything else.”

Artemis stared into your eyes, it felt like she was staring straight through you and into your soul. You remained strong though, holding eye contact with her and kept your head held high. It wasn’t a lie. You couldn’t deny it, you’d protect Clarisse with your life, but at the end of the day you were loyal to your goddess, she and your sisters came first, always.

“Okay,” Artemis said. She gave you a curt nod before getting up and leaving you alone by the fire.

You turned back towards the fire, staring into the flames as you thought about what had just happened. Artemis believed you; she knew your words were true, she knew you were loyal till the end.

Taglist: @cxcilla @danonered @touchmyfracturedomens @luclue @manu-007s-world @death-in-love @nenas19 @mynameiskaci

[bouncybongfairy]

Shits and Giggles

Rue Bennett x Fem Reader

Summary: You become Rue's rebound from Jules; you are aware from the beginning that this wasn't a serious relationship. However, what happened in your bed with her seemed pretty momentous.

Word Count: 2k+

Trigger Warning: Smut and Drugs

<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3

Ever since you first saw Rue, you knew you were going to get close with her. She was a beautiful mentally ill druggie and what could you say, that was your type. You guys really gravitated to each other because of your issues. It's easy to be with someone who is struggling the same as you because you don't have to explain things that are unhealthy yet normal. It was nice not having someone judge you for your depression room or wanting to rot in bed. Not to mention drinking or getting high with someone who wasn't doing it to post online. It's not like you didn't know that this was toxic, you just didn't care. Both of you had people in your life that lectured you daily. People who were always gazing at you with disappointed eyes. You were each other's escape from that, and that meant a lot to the both of you. 

You met her when you were skipping class in the bathroom smoking. She asked you for a couple of puffs off the blunt, which you gave her. You complained about how teachers would seem to pick on the kids whom they knew didn't pay attention. You asked if she wanted to ditch with you and she was more than happy to do so. You walked the 30 minutes to your house, Rue asked you if your parents would be home and this is when you told her your mom had died. She didn't say much about her dad dying but she did let you know. There was no need to explain because you both knew what it was like. Like a mutual agreement not to acknowledge each other's suffering. It was the first time you'd ever snorted a pill. You were nervous, like super scared but she talked you through everything which made you feel comforted. You turned on Jersey Shore and laid in bed together, just zoning out. You had a swamp cooler that directly faced your bed, which made the room ice cold. This brought you two closer underneath the blankets. 

After taking a nap, Rue FaceTimed her mom to show she was at a friend's house. You sat at your desk with your laptop and pretended to be working on homework. This made you both burst into laughter once she hung up. Your dad came home from his 16 hour shift and greeted you before going to bed. You shared the burger king that he brought home for dinner. When Rue lit the blunt in the middle of eating, you knew she was going to be a bad habit. The one time you did that in front of someone they called you disgusting for doing so. When she did this so nonchalantly, it really left an impression on you. 

"I think we're going to be great together," you said, stuffing your face with the golden fries.

"Are you sure about that?" she asked to take a drag before taking a bite of her burger. 

"If you let us be then yeah," you said, taking the blunt from her. 

Ever since then, you two were pretty much inseparable. It was definitely weird at times; once, you were walking down the hall hand in hand with Rue and passed Jules. It made you feel bad, especially because you knew that they were together when she was sober. It made you feel inferrer a bit, like Jules got the real Rue. You never brought this up to her, because you didn't want to scare her off. You also were doing drugs with her so it felt a bit hypocritical to say anything about that. 

You were sitting in the cafeteria with Rue, picking at your lunches. You were trying to finish a math assignment that was due next period. Rue was drawing things like bongs and weed flowers, knowing it would distract you because it had to be raised. She kept laughing when you would playfully scold her for doing so. 

"It's just a piece of paper," she would taunt you.

"iT's jUsT a PiEcE oF PaPer," you would mimic. 

She laughed and continued until you finished the last equation and raised the last doodle. You kissed her on the cheek and she hung her head down giggling to herself. You practically huffed half a cart down in the bathroom before entering the cafeteria. She pulled your chair closer and nudged you with her shoulder. The bell rang shortly after, you got up and threw both of your trays away and started walking towards your class. Rue pulled you by the arm into the bathroom, the one with the scratched mirror behind the E-building. None of the girls used it to actually go to the restroom because they couldn't examine themselves obsessively in the mirror. She helped you sit on the edge of the sink, resting each hand on either side of you. 

"And where did you think you were going?" she asked.

"5th period," you responded rhetorically. 

"Why don't we go to your place and uh, have some fun? she stated more than asked. 

"You won't get in trouble?" you asked.

"I'll think of an excuse later," she said, giving you a kiss before helping you down. 

You guys took the bus back to your place, neither of you wanted to walk the distance. Once you were home you went back to your bedroom and cranked the AC on. Rue complained about the icebox of a room you have which made you laugh; there was no way you were turning it off. You went to your closet and pulled out your half drank bottle of Kirkland vodka. You went into the kitchen and grabbed a tall glass and filled it with ice before heading back into the room. You pour a good amount of alcohol into it, letting it chill for a minute. 

"You're so high maintenance, why don't you drink it out of the bottle?" she asked. 

"Well sorry if I don't want my entire chest and throat burning after the first shot," you said, walking over to her and kissing her forehead. When you walked back to strain the liquor into the shot glasses, she followed. 

"Seriously this seems excessive," she said, wrapping her arms around your waist from behind. 

"Quit your bitchin' and take this with me," you said, turning around and handing her the tiny glass. You quickly cheer and both tip your head back. 

You pull away from her and go digging in your backpack, grinning from ear to ear once you feel the plastic baggie. When you pull it out, you show Rue she matches your grin. It was two tabs of acid that had a faint picture of the Rick and Morty logo, barely visible due to the discolorations. It didn't take long to kick in, well it did but due to the second and third shot it didn't feel that long. You were both giggling and dancing with each other around your room. Knocking each other over every once in a while, landing on the bed. You would quickly recover once a song motivated you both enough to start dancing again. You were feeling light, like your head could lift you off the ground. Rue kept running her hands through your hair which would make you shiver. Rue kept wanting to do a line but you eventually found another way to distract her. 

The last time you fell on the bed you ended up face to face, rubbing each other's foreheads together. She kept running her hands down your arm and the exposed skin on your side. She kept mumbling about how soft you were. Hearing this come for her was making your stomach flip. Somewhere between cuddling and rubbing against one another you start to make out. She was laying on her back and you were straddling her. You were holding her head in your hands as you kissed. She quickly sits up which catches you off guard. You pull your tee-shirt off and get slightly embarrassed when you are reminded of the fact that you didn't have a bra on. She stared at your chest for a while before taking your nipple into her mouth. You let out a moan and let her pull you as she let her back fall against your mattress. You pull away and tug at her sweat pants, she takes the hint and helps you take them off. You smirk and take your shorts off, you start grinding against her. You hover back over her and start to give her a hickey on her neck. She starts playing with your chest as you do this. This made it harder to kiss her neck because you were moaning so much. 

"Fuck you look like a pornstar," Rue said flipping you over and shoving her hand into your panties. 

She started playing with your clit, using her middle finger. You bury your face into her neck and let out a couple moans. If she already thought you looked like a pornstar so you might as well sound the part. You were completely soaked, this was the first time you'd ever done anything like this with rue. The sexual tension between you had been building for so long, that even hearing her voice sometimes made you melt. It was nice to have a sexual experience with someone and not worry about how you looked or came across as. She continued to stroke you, arched you back and buckled your hip up every once in a while. You tried kissing her but you were in such a state of pleasure that your lips were just pressed together slightly. It was like she was trying to eat your moans. You pull away from her right before your climax. 

 "Do.. you wanna, uh.. 69?" you asked, trying to catch your breath.

"Yeah but only if you're on top of me," she said. 

"You're sinister for that," you said, getting on top. 

"And much more," she said, smacking you with what felt like all the strength she had. 

When you started eating her out, you were pleased to feel that she was just as wet as you. You were kind of worried that she might not be as into you as you are her but that thought quickly left. You start flicking your tongue slowly, slowly increasing your pace as she did the same. She penetrated you with her fingers which made you gasp and press yourself onto her face. When you did this, she smacked your ass with both hands causing you to squeal. You tried to keep your rhythm but you were finding this hard because of how close you were getting. You were full on riding her face and fingers at this point. You could tell that Rue was getting close because he rhythm was becoming spotty. As you started to cum, you could feel her clit harden slightly. This was just enough encouragement to keep going instead of sitting up and going full cowgirl on her face. You both rode out your orgasm before you fell back next to her on the bed. 

You grabbed your tee-shirt and wiped her face off before doing the same to yourself. You both looked over at each other and couldn't help but burst out laughing. Not because it was awkward, more likely from the drugs that were still in your system. You both change into different clothes before cuddling back in bed. Rue had fallen asleep for a while while you played with her hair. You noticed some of her curls sticking to her neck because she was so sweaty. You grabbed a hair tie and pulled all her hair into a bun. Every once in a while you would plant a kiss on her forehead or nose. She was holding onto by the waist, you woke her up to ask if her arm was losing circulation from being underneath you. 

"Don't wake me up to ask stupid shit like that again," she grumbled. Right as she finished the sentence, there was a hard knock at the door which made both of you jump. 

"Dinner's on the counter!" your dad shouted through the door, when you both looked over and saw the panicked expression on each other's faces you both started laughing.

[random-thot-generator]

Dirty Little Secret + pt. 3

JOHNNY 'SOAP' MACTAVISH x FEM READER

-

Summary: Johnny shows up out of the blue and gets to meet Aunt Rue. Cue the impromptu come-to-Jesus meeting.

Warnings/Tags: Angst - obviously, Profanity, Sex is mentioned but nothing explicit, Soap's POV, Rue's POV, Reader is taking a moment, Aunt Rue's a good mum, No use of Y/N

(Notes: Again, no smut. We're not there yet, folks. Wanted to get Johnny's side of the story out there, along with Aunt Rue's thoughts on the matter. Just a warning. Edited this to Kickstart My Heart on loop, so if there's a shit-ton of mistakes... my bad. 🤷‍♀️)

Word Count: 2K

-

Johnny felt like the wind had been knocked out of him when he heard your voice behind the counter, but when you suddenly popped into view, it almost brought him to his knees. The only thing that kept him from reaching for you was that horrible, devastated expression on your face. Tucking his hands in his pockets to hide their shaking, he took a hesitant step towards the counter, as if approaching a cornered, wild animal.

"I'm no' here t'cause ye grief, hen," he murmured, trying to make eye contact. "I jus' wanted t'see ya."

You blinked up at him, huffing a breath out of your open mouth. "I didn't think I'd ever see you again," you confessed, sounding dazed. "How did you…?"

Johnny scratched the back of his neck, feeling like a bit of a creeper. "I, uh… I saw ye on the news. Some sort o' festival 'r somethin'."

"The May Day celebration," you mumbled, remembering the news cameraman panning his camera along the row of booths on the boardwalk. "Bloody hell. So… you saw me and just decided to stop by for a visit? After six months?"

Johnny's look turned sour. "It was no' like I knew where the hell ye'd gone off to, now was it? Ye jus' took off without sayin' a bloody word," he replied, his tone low and accusing.

You scoffed, your own expression growing dark. "And how could I have told you, Johnny? It's not like you ever bothered to give me your number, remember?" you fired back.

The bitterness in your tone cooled his anger instantly. "I…" He huffed out a breath, shoulders slumping. "Yer right. Tha's on me." His contrite expression returned. "It was jus' a shock, comin' back an' findin' ya gone, yer flat empty. I was no' expectin' it. Not after…" He blew out a breath, running his hand over his mohawk. "I dinnae ken wha' t'think."

You crossed your arms over your chest, lips trembling. "I'm surprised you thought of me at all. Why did you even go back to my flat? Things not work out with your other bird?"

"Other bird?" he repeated, scowling, looking utterly confused.

Before you could clarify, your aunt pushed through the swinging door from the kitchen, wiping her hands on a towel. Whatever she was about to say died on her lips as her eyes darted between you and Johnny. "Everything alright, love?" she asked you.

"Everything's fine." You dragged your eyes away from him to address your aunt, your tone softening. "I'm sorry 'bout your tea. The box was empty, and then he showed up, and…" You sighed, closing your eyes, shoulders dropping in defeat. "I— I need to go back to the stockroom. Maybe there's another box of oolong back there."

Picking up on the obvious tension and your need to escape the young man, Aunt Rue patted your arm affectionately. "'Course, love. Go ahead. I'll see t'him."

You gave a slight nod, eyes slanting towards Johnny for only a second, but then your chin gave a wobble, and you rushed through the swinging door. He called after you, taking an unconscious step forward, hand reaching out, but you didn't stop. A pained expression crossed his face before he turned and paced a few steps away, raising both hands to rub over his head, holding them there as he blew out a frustrated breath.

Rue pursed her lips, studying him before her eyes cut back to the kitchen door. "So, I take it ya know one another," she drawled.

Johnny turned back around, dropping his arms to his sides. He looked like a whipped pup. "Yes, ma'am. We were… She was my…" A myriad of emotions played over his face before he sighed, remorse evident in his eyes. "Aye. We know each other."

Rue smirked, brows lifting. "I see." She turned to the hot water urns and grabbed a couple of to-go cups. "Tea or coffee, lad?"

Johnny blew out a frustrated sigh. "Dinnae bother, ma'am. I should prob'ly jus' go. Sorry t'have bothered—"

Rue snorted, amused. "Ya ain't gettin' off that easy, lad. Been dealin' with that heartbroken lass for six months. I've got questions, an' you're just the one to answer 'em. So. Tea or coffee?"

Johnny opened his mouth to refuse but didn't have it in him to argue. "Coffee, please. Black with sugar," he mumbled.

Rue hummed in acknowledgment, making them both a strong cup, forgetting about the oolong. She needed all cylinders firing for this one. As she worked, Red finally showed, cheerful as always. He gave Johnny a friendly nod, opening his mouth to greet Rue, but she cut him off.

"No time for chit-chat this mornin', Red," she told him, throwing a couple of rolls into a bag and handing them over. She reached beneath the counter and grabbed his favorite jam packets, then rounded the counter to hand them to him. "On the house, yeah?" she said, ignoring his shocked expression. "Off ya go, then. See ya tomorrow."

Red could do little more than nod as Rue herded him out the door, casting a flummoxed look back as she shut the door and locked it behind him. Reaching for the cups she left sitting on the counter, she handed one to Johnny.

"C'mon, lad. Let's go out back an' have ourselves a wee chinwag."

She led the way to the back exit, checking to be sure you were still inside before motioning him out the door. Walking over to a pair of metal folding chairs leaned against the wall, she grabbed one, nodding for Johnny to take the other, then sat down with a tired sigh. Once, they were both seated, she crossed her legs and looked him over with a critical eye.

"Alright, then. First things first, lad. I'm Rue, her aunt, and you are…"

"John, ma'am. John MacTavish, but ye can call me Johnny."

She nodded, giving him a tight-lipped smile. "Well, it's nice t'meet ya, Johnny." She took a quick sip of coffee and smacked her lips. "Now, let's get down t'brass tacks, shall we?" She sat back and crossed her arms over her lap. "I'm goin' to take a wild guess an' say you're the reason why my girl came runnin' home with her tail between her legs. Not seen her in that bad a shape since her da dumped her on my doorstep, so it must have been serious. How long were ya together?"

Taken aback, it took a moment for Johnny to answer. "I been seein' her fer almost two years, but we were no'… I mean, it wasnae…" He huffed a frustrated breath and scrubbed his hand over his 'hawk. "It's— It's complicated."

Rue rolled her eyes, making a scoffing noise. "Bloody hell, this generation, I swear…" She shook her head. "Just say ya were fuckin', lad. Jesus." She scoffed again. "Complicated, he says…" she muttered.

Johnny gaped at her, surprised by her blunt words. His brows furrowed, an embarrassed look on his reddening face. "It was no' jus' fuckin'," he muttered, sounding defensive. "I cared 'bout her— do care 'bout her."

"Uh-huh. So, what happened, then? What would send my girl runnin' back to the one place she worked so hard to escape, hm?"

His lips parted, but he didn't have an answer. Eyes darting back and forth, he searched for an explanation, a reason why you would just up and leave him without saying anything. He thought it might have been another bloke, but after that last night together, he couldn't bring himself to believe it. So, why? Why did you leave? He had been searching for that answer for the last six months. Finally, he settled for repeating your confusing words from earlier. "She said somethin' 'bout another bird," he said glumly. "Dunno wha' the hell she's talkin' 'bout."

Rue's brows ticked up. "Sure about that? You're a handsome lad. Doubt ya have trouble pullin' the birds."

"No!" he snapped. "I'd never che—." He cut himself off, gritting his teeth in frustration. "There was no other bird," he grumbled out.

His hand clenched into a fist, the other warping the to-go cup, some of the hot brew spilling over his knuckles. Cursing under his breath, he set it on the ground, slinging the hot liquid off his hand. He glared at the back of his hand, then huffed a tired breath, his expression softening. "I dinnae want anyone else. Jus' her." He shook his head, looking lost.

Rue studied him, her head tilting to the side. "She never mentioned you, ya know? Never once spoke your name. I knew she was hurtin'— obviously, but there was somethin' about the way she looked when I'd try to bring it up, like she was... ashamed. 'Course, we've all been fools for love, so I figured some bloke had filled her head with a bunch of pretty words, promisin' her the moon an' stars, then broke her heart, but…" Her eyes narrowed. "Explain to me what 'complicated' means."

A look akin to the shamed face you would always give her now came over his. He started picking at one of his cuticles, studying it with keen interest, his bottom lip jutting out a little.

"When we first started hookin' up, it wasnae a big deal. We'd run into each other at the pub an' end up back at her place." He shrugged but then paused, his eyes growing solemn. "But then, somethin' changed. I'd catch m'self thinkin' 'bout her, like all the bloody time, while I was deployed. Then I'd come home an' find m'self goin' back t'tha' same damn pub, hopin' t'see her, gettin' pissed when she was no' there." He sighed, shook his head. "I finally gave up pretendin' it was jus' a hook up, an' started goin' over t'her place when I was on leave."

"So, you're a soldier, then," Rue said softly.

A grim look pulled the corners of his mouth down. "Aye. A sergeant in the Army. Special forces." He frowned, an inner struggle going on inside his head. "I ken 's no' the best job t'have, no' when ya got a lass waitin' fer ya at home. 'S hard t'make it work, bein' gone so much. Most birds canna hack it, end up callin' it quits. Figured I'd come home one day an' she'd be shacked up wi' some other bloke. Thought that might'a been wha' happened, but... I had t'see fer m'self." A sad expression made his eyes look luminous in the morning sun. "Tol' m'self I should leave her be, let 'er go, but I canna do it."

He sighed, leaned back in his chair and scrubbed at the scruff on his cheek. "I never tol' her how I felt, dinnae think it was fair puttin' tha' on her. Tried no' t'crowd her, dinnae hang about her place, makin' a nuisance o' m'self. Thought I was protectin' her, but it was jus' as much fer me, I guess. Dinnae help."

Rue's heart went out to the poor lad, despite how bloody stupid he was. "Could ya not tell that she loved ya, lad?"

Johnny's brows shot up, his mouth falling open. "She… She loves me?"

Rue sniffed a laugh. "Bloody hell, you really are an eejit, aren't ya?" She shook her head, amazed at how clueless he was. "'Course she loves ya, ya daft numpty." Her eyes grew shrewd as she watched him process the revelation, saw the hope bloom in his eyes.

"So, tell me, Johnny boy. What are ya willin' to do to get her back?"

-

part 2 part 4

[chrisevansonly]

The Phone Call

Pairing: Harry Styles x Female Reader (Harry's Angel AU🦋)

Summary: The first weeks of your flower shop opening was supposed to be filled with happy memories, not the past coming back to drag you back down...

Warnings: These TW should be taken seriously. Abuse, violence towards reader, mentions of sexual assault, toxic behaviour and foul language towards reader, potential warning of attempted sexual assault, slight? mentions of self-harm, extremely angst filled, will end with comfort and very soft Harry, but majority of this fic is not to be taken lightly

A/N: this fic was intense and hard for me to write, as someone who has been a victim of domestic violence, and sexual assault as well as r*pe, I do not write this with ill intention or to be fun and add a spin to this AU I had to pause a few times which is why this is late, but it brought up memories I didn't really want to remember. Angel although a nickname for female reader, feels like she is a part of me, I feel the pain she experienced first-hand through my own eyes. Her backstory is dark but that doesn’t mean she is bound by it if anything she is a fighter and she is strong. Albeit this was hard for me to write, it was time people got to know her deeper and to know the struggles she went through. I ended up taking out a few really dark parts because I just couldn’t publish it. Anyway, I am here if anyone ever needs anything at all, thank you for the endless support xox – rue 

Word Count: 2K+

Standing in front of your own business, the one you’d been planning to start for years was almost like a fever dream for you, it took hours of hard work, long hours, and the dedication you threw into the project from the start. You were blessed to be surrounded by not only an extremely supportive family, but your partner in crime and ever so sweet boyfriend Harry. He would do anything in his power to help you and to see you achieve your dreams, even if it were dreams that reached as high as the stars, he would give you the entire universe to show you how much he loved and cared for you. It was a stark contrast to the love you though you received from Sam your ex-boyfriend, whom you split up with two years ago. Despite the split he had continued to find ways to haunt you whether it was repeatedly getting new numbers to text you, sending letters and gifts to your apartment, hell he even stalked you. When you met Harry that all seemed to stop and you finally found a sliver of peace you could allow yourself to bathe within, Sam’s hold on you dropping enough for you to begin to heal and find yourself after years of abuse. 

It was a Tuesday when it happened, Harry’s range rover pulling up to the curb as he dropped you off at the shop, he had a few meetings today but those never stopped him from driving you to work and picking you up, you were his first priority, his angel. You smiled looking at the shop before turning to Harry and smiling 

“Thank you for dropping me off love”

He squeezed your hand gently, a radiant smile on his face 

“You’re welcome m’angel, I’ll be back to get you around three?”

“That’s perfect, I love you H”

He leaned over to press his lips to yours sweetly, his hands framing your face, one of the many things he did that had your heart pounding 

“I love you more”

Unbuckling your seatbelt, you were sure to grab your tote bag with your lunch and the remained of the things you’d need throughout your day. Stepping out you blew Harry one last kiss before closing the door and heading to the shop, Harry made sure to wait until you were inside before pulling away and driving off down the road. The smell of fresh flowers and botanicals filling your senses which only added to your happiness, it was going to be a good day, you could just feel it.

-

The crowds had been steady throughout the day, people coming in and out, but also leaving enough time for you to get some work done in the back office, any bills you needed to sort out, or companies you had to email back regarding events or inquiries. You’d managed to get the majority of the things you needed done before the bell sounded through the shop, dusting your overalls off and letting out a tired sigh, you stood up and walked out only to freeze when your eyes locked on the man standing by the door 

“There’s my firefly…”

It was almost as if someone had unplugged your body from a power source with the way you shut down, your hands tensed at your sides, calculating what your next few steps would be, and how you were going to get out of this situation. The button to press for emergencies like a fire, or burglary that the security company had installed which would also phone Harry, was too far from reach now, and you knew how Sam was, if you freaked and ran to it, he’d get to you first

“What? No words Y/N? I knew you were stupid, but come on”

“G-Get out.”

He nodded and when his eyes locked on yours it was like he was void of absolutely all feeling and emotion…had he always been that way? He said it was your fault. Was he just always this way? Your brain was spinning out of control, your breathing picking up.

“Hmm no, don’t think I will, you owe me.”

Owe him? What could you possibly owe him, the last time you’d seen Sam, he had beaten you within an inch of your life, you were placed in a medically induced coma for almost a month, he’d broken three ribs, fractured your arm and given you a concussion, amongst other things, you were essentially unrecognizable 

“I-I don’t owe you anything get out!” 

His jaw tensed and you knew he was getting angry; he’d always had a bad temper and that was enough for you to take off towards the far wall to hit the little purple button. The second your finger skimmed the wall you were yanked backwards, and your head smacked the concrete floor, obviously hard enough to fill your vision with black spots, a groan of pain escaping

“I wish you hadn’t of touched that sweetheart, I was here to talk amicably, now I’m not so sure you bitch.” 

He straddled over your hips sending a smirk your way as you tried to wiggle enough to get him off, but being already disoriented was not helping you much 

“Please, just l-leave me alone…get off me...”

“Aw come on firefly, you used to love this game…used to love when I’d hold you down and make you feel good? Remember? Yeah, you’d fight me so hard…it only made it more fun for me”

You shook your head thrashing as much as you could, you didn’t know if you’d managed to hit the panic button, but god were you hoping you did

“Fuck you Sam.”

His fist came down and slammed into the side of your head twice, the second one enough to snap your nose, evidence from the audible crack that filled your ears. You were gasping in pain at this point, your whole body on fire and screaming in pain

“You ungrateful bitch, I should have beaten you harder back then, maybe now’s my redemption huh? Been a while since that seemingly loud mouths made me feel good, maybe we should put you to work”

The grip he has on your wrists was terrifyingly strong as he continued to hold you there, you couldn’t even look at him, your right eye swelling and tears had started to blur your vision, or was it the throbbing pain in your head? You couldn’t be sure at this point. 

“Stupid bitch.”

Sam got up walking around the shop before you started to hear things smashing against the floor, his yelling going unnoticed by you as you weakly pulled yourself into a corner between two workbenches, the flashing purple above you let you know you had in fact hit the button, but you weren’t sure how long it would take anyone to get to you. It sends an alert to Harry as well, but you hoped he wouldn’t notice or wouldn’t come until Sam was long gone. The shouting had stopped for a few seconds before a hand grabbed your ankle and you let out a scream kicking your legs, that only landed you back against the floor with his hands at your neck. 

His eyes dark with murderous intent, and in this moment, in this exact second you wished he would kill you, you wished he’d take the life out of your heart. Take the pain from your mind, your body, pull the night terrors you still got out of your head, put your body to rest, where you could find peace for once. 

“J-just kill me a-already…”

You had given up in this moment, you were done, you had come to terms with the fact that you might not ever see Harry again, and if the memories you began to think about were the last thing you saw as you took one last breath, then so be it…he had made you so happy in the almost two years you had been together than anyone had ever made you feel within your lifetime. He had added sunshine to your dark days, light to your shadows and warmth to your once frozen and nervous heart, he was the safe space you’d struggled so hard to find, and if you never had that again…it was your time to go then. 

-

Sirens and talking back and forth filled the open space you were sat in, a blanket around your shoulders, your stare on the far wall, only it was like you weren’t there, it was like you were empty. Memories of being so low you’d turn to alternative ways to heal whether it was showering with the water too hot, not eating or leaving marks where no one could see. You never thought you’d fall back into this dark place you clawed your way out of, you don’t even remember when the paramedics or police showed up, and you can’t remember what happened to Sam, but you didn’t care

“Let me through! No-NO I need to see her, please! That’s my girlfriend!”

Harry had just gotten to your shop after receiving the alert on his phone, and the minute he pulled up and saw the first responders he felt his heart fall, he knew something was wrong when you didn’t answer the phone any of the times, he spammed you on the way over. He fought with the police for a while before moving around them and bolting for you, pausing when he kneeled down and noticed just how in shock you were

“Y/N? Angel...? Hey, can you hear me?”

You remained quiet despite your brain yelling at you that Harry had come, that he was here, that you were alive, trying everything to get you to snap back into yourself. Harry had seen this once before, and he thought before gently taking your hands and holding your index fingers to the pulse points on his wrists, noting that you didn’t pull away which was a good sign 

“Harry…?”

Your eyes slowly moved to him and despite the blurred version of him, you knew it was your Harry, he was here, holding onto your hands, his eyes filled with traces of panic and worry as he watched you carefully 

“I’m here baby, I’m right here, I’ve got you angel, promise”

You couldn’t help the sob of relief that left your lips, the floodgates of emotions finally spilling over after shutting yourself down, despite the pain you still felt you leaned forward, and Harry took you into his chest, holding you tight to his chest, still remaining careful not to hurt you 

“I know, I know baby…I’m so sorry, you’re safe now”

“I w-was gonna d-die” 

Harry pressed a few kisses to your head, his hands rubbing your back 

“You didn’t, I’d never let that happen, I’ll never let anything like that happen again, okay?”

“Promise me…”

“I promise angel, I promise.” 

You remained on the floor with Harry, your hands holding onto his sweater tightly before the paramedics advised the two of you to head to the hospital, upon fighting with the medics Harry said he would take you, knowing you needed him now more than ever, and he wasn’t going to let you out of his sights.  Seeing you sitting there on the floor with a black eye and blood over your faces, the bruises that littered your once clear skin, sent him over the edge, and he made a promise to himself to never ever let anything like this happen to you again.

If you had of been okay, you would have noticed the blood on his knuckles from punching Sam a few times as he wandered out of the shop with the police, thankfully who let Harry off with a warning. He would have killed him for you, but now his one and only goal, was getting his love healthy, getting her home to where she would be safe, and being there for her in any way I could. Poppy your older sister was already on her way from London but knowing you wouldn’t want your parents to know he told Poppy to handle that, which she was more than happy too. You were his whole entire world, and seeing you fall asleep in the passenger seat as he sped to the hospital, and knowing the pain you were in, was something he would never forget, it was a memory even to this day that harbours his thoughts.

He knows if he’d have lost you that day, his world, his universe, his everything would have come to a halt, and he wouldn’t have known what to do. Which is why he loves on you every second he gets, checks in every minute he can, and fills your life with as much sunshine and warmth as he can, because he’d do anything for his angel. 

[aryastark-valarmorghulis]

My amc Iwtv stories

(newest fics listed first)

Loves to be loved (Rating E, 10K) - Lestat/Louis Lestat is rehearsing for the tour. He’s also in a situationship with his ex-husband, who is the Vampire Lestat’s official photographer.

No name (Rating M, 3K) - Armand/Lestat 1795. The spoils of revolution.

your beautiful face is imperfectly comprehended by human minds (who wishes to know it must first die) (Rating T, 2K) - Daniel/Louis Dubai, after hours: Daniel and Louis talk.

Asphodel Meadows (Rating M, 2,3K) - Armand/Louis and Armand/Daniel Dubai, 2022. Armand keeps vigil.

I make up things that I would never say (I say them very quietly) (Rating E, 7.8K) - Armand/Daniel Armand loves Daniel. But Daniel doesn't know him anymore.

The Haunting of Rue Royale (Rating E, 10K) - Lestat/Louis 1930, 1939 and 1940: love and hate side by side in 1132 Rue Royale.

the devil you know (Rating T, 1.3K) - Lestat/Louis The evening Louis finds out Lestat didn’t kill Antoinette.

I couldn't get the boy to kill me but I wore his jacket for the longest time (Rating T, 1.5K) - Armand/Daniel Dubai, 2022: Daniel eats breakfast in the company of Rashid.

Once again I love and I do not love (Rating M, 1.8K) - Lestat/Louis The night before the Mardi Gras ball.

[heather-chandlers-weirder-cousin]

Me: alright, this is our first gift exchange, someone is writing something for us so we have to write something in return, we promised.

My brain:

My brain: But what if we finished that videogame we've literally never cared about before?

[dreamteamemojis]

wait did Tommy make Rue edit that fucking video 😭 like ohhhh boy I bet ya girl was having to constantly remind herself that if she quit she'd never get more than 2k people to watch her tiktoks again

[tafadhali]

Yuletide recs, part 1

Cross-posting this from DW. I have >50 works bookmarked on Pinboard so far, but here are 24 favorites.

Asteroid City I hadn't thought to seek out fic for this movie, but I thought both of these captured the Wes Anderson style brilliantly and developed characters and a relationship we only see a glimpse of in the film in interesting (and very different) ways: 

Things That Won't Be Here Tomorrow (Conrad/Jones, 6k)

windows broken and dreaming (Conrad/Jones, 4k)

Bottoms So Bomb (PJ/Hazel, PJ & Josie, 1k) — "Josie helps PJ be a better girlfriend to Hazel"; hysterical

Casablanca The Sentimentalists (Rick/Ilsa, Ilsa/Victor, Rick/Ilsa/Victor, 9k) — post-canon, Rick runs into Ilsa and Victor in Lisbon

Dimension 20

In our midnight world (Leiland/Markus, 5k) — really captures the silliness of Escape from the Bloodkeep and I love all the appearances by the other characters

it doesn't hurt; there's nothing to it(Hob/Rue, 4k)— love them and love them trying to ~*~communicate~*~; hot and sweet first time

Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves Perception Check (Roll for Romance) (Xenk/Edgin, 6k) —

"I bet Xenk fucks like a metronome, too. You know." Holga makes a highly suggestive, repetitive gesture. "In, out. In, out. No variation. Same exact rhythm every time. Boring." Edgin stares at her, torn between horror and fascination. "You've really thought about this, huh?" (So has he. Unfortunately.)

Frederica - Georgette Heyer A Series of Notable Events (Frederica/Alverstoke, 13k) — "What it says on the tin: a series of notable events in the lives of Frederica and Alverstoke, post-canon."

Goblin Emperor A Private Room (gen, 5k) — Maia learns of a scandal brewing from Csethiro, but she is quite able to manage things

An Unexpected Letter (gen, 1k) — Thara gets a letter from the Emperor after Grief of Stones and I have several feelings

The Good Place The Real Actual Human Life of Michael Realman (gen, 1k) — what it says in the title! cute and fun

Hercule Poirot

The Case of the Distracted Detective (Hastings/Poirot, 2k) — I can honestly say I've never read this particular misunderstanding before, and itw as charming and funny!

The Eye of a Needle (gen, 4k) — a neat little casefic with a daemon AU twist

High School Musical Stick to the Status Quo (Reprise) (Chad/Ryan, 17k) — I was totally charmed by this "didn't know they were dating" classic

Jeeves & Wooster Supporting Partner's Suit (Jeeves/Wooster, Honoria/OFC, 6k) — "Never let it be said that Bertie Wooster will abandon a pal in need, even if that pal is a woman who is temporarily in possession of his body and he doesn’t fully understand what’s going on"

Kiss Kiss Bang Bang Fool Proof (Harry/Perry/Harmony, 7k) — this is extremely hot and very funny; captures the tone of the movie perfectly

The Matrix if you'll believe in me (gen, 7k) — "Trinity thinks about anger. Bugs thinks about choices. Both of them think about the future." Interesting fic that picks up mid-Resurrections

Nine Worlds a key that winds through secret wards (gen, 11k) — Kip in the aftermath of the Emerald Conspiracy; a really interesting look into an unexplored part of canon

Ocean's 11 pulse and swing (baby do your thing) (Danny/Rusty, 3k) — fixit for O8 involves Danny doing thief PT and re-figuring out his and Rusty's relationship

somebody else's wallet (Danny/Rusty, 1k) — nicely structured ficlet about Danny and Rusty becoming DannyandRusty

Oz the skin you're in (Dorothy/Ozma, 6k) — "'If we learn magic, you could maybe change your body to be like your old one. You weren’t ever given the choice to keep that boy’s body, were you?' asked Dorothy.

Keep it? The idea jolted Ozma a little bit. Why, how does a person keep another body? You only had the one, right?"

Singin' in the Rain Working Honeymoon (Don/Cosmo/Kathy, 4k) — somehow Cosmo finds himself coming along for the ride on Don and Kathy's honeymoon

Sports Night First Chill of Fall (Dan/Casey, 3k) — all I ever want for Yuletide is more Dan/Casey... this one is set post-s2 and features a slightly oblivious Dan

The Sting the last train to wherever you need to be (Henry/Johnny, 3k) — against their better interests, Johnny and Henry keep running into each other post-movie

[swallowtailed]

creator 2k22 meme

year six of this post! (was an ask meme, now i just do it annually, even keeping the very silly "2k". if you want to do this, please consider yourself tagged!) looks like last year i said i thought 2022 would be less fic-heavy than 2021, and sure enough it has been. anyway, my top some-number favorite fics of mine this year, not in any particular order:

some say it's a blessing (OFMD) - jim/olu, t, 11k. this was a tremendously fun fic to write, and probably one of my favorites i've ever done. love to put a spin on a classic trope!

the gardens (D20: ACOFAF) - rue/hob, g, 2k. i absolutely adored "a court of fey and flowers", and it is always extremely fun to write dramatic romance dialogue.

right, so we're going to consider numbers 3-5 my original work this year, lmao. i sold the short story i've been tagging "#rhr curator", which is very exciting :):) and i'm cooking a few other things right now, including another rhr-verse short story, and (third time's the charm) the big central project of rhr.

pretty quiet year in terms of writing overall. but i'm definitely going to be doing fic for fatt and whatever else catches my eye in 2023... and crossing my fingers i'll be able to make progress on rhr again, lmao. so here's to that!

[killa-trav]

thanks for the tag @canestrello @speaknowseb @sebastianvettelx

put your favourite playlist on shuffle and list the first ten songs then tag ten people! no skipping! (this is just my liked songs playlist w over 2k songs lol bc i refuse to use separate playlists)

1. momentary bliss - gorillaz

2. me & you - HONNE

3. subject matters - little simz

4. build me a way - bakar

5. wounds - little simz

6. treflip - NiNE8

7. for you - lava la rue

8. numbers on the brain - frankie stew + harvey gunn

9. make it count - finn foxell

10. plastic - loyle carner

tagging whoever wants to do this!!

[cryonme]

— 𝐖𝐞'𝐥𝐥 𝐍𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐇𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐒𝐞𝐱

— Remus Lupin x fem!reader

— summary: you're used to boys wanting one thing and one thing only from you, causing you to be thrown off when Remus Lupin kisses you, just to kiss you. based off of "We'll Never Have Sex" by Leith Ross.

for @fairydxll 's 2k writing celebration! sorry it took so long, angel.

prompts: "I think I'm in love with you and I'm terrified." + "Please never stop smiling."

word count: 2.5k

— tw: slut shaming (ew, i know), alcohol, marijuana, cursing, mentions sex. mainly fluff ewwww ;)

— a/n: eek! i've been wanting to do a fic based off of this song for a while now, and i thought it would work so well with these prompts I simply couldn't resist!! i'm sorry its been so long since i've uploaded a fic, life has been really hectic and honestly really shitty and sitting down to write has been hard, but I'm so happy i finally finished this one. hope you all love it like I do!! xoxo Miz

═════════════════

“Heard (Y/n) (Y/l/n)’s gonna be at the party tonight, she’s an easy target.”

Sirius Black didn’t even give his best friend a chance to react before he was smacking their fellow Gryffindor’s books out of his hands and straight to the ground, making them land with a dull thud that echoed through the corridors, never once turning his head to get a good look at the kid, he didn’t have to to know he was probably rat faced.

Remus didn’t say anything, but he had never been one to do so. He kept his eyes forward, piercing down the long hallway, but his anger showed in the tightness of his jaw and the white of his knuckled as his grip on his shoulder bag strap tightened, and if you looked close enough you could see the glint of a heavy sadness twinkle in his brown eyes, but only if you looked close enough, of course. 

Which Sirius had.

The darker haired boy opened his mouth to say something, anything to his best mate to get at least the ghost of a smile to graze his lips, but he quickly shut it when he saw you making a beeline for the two of them from the opposite direction, a bright smile plastered on your face.

And, suddenly, there was the light in Remus Lupin’s eyes.

“I am so ready to get absolutely plastered!” You enthused, your eyes wide with excitement as you linked arms with your two friends, looking back and forth between the two of them, patiently awaiting for excited smiles to grace their handsome features as well. But, when they both just nodded, pathetic smiles hanging loosely from their lips, your shoulders slumped.

“You’re not excited?”

“Of course we are.” Remus assured you, raising an eyebrow at Sirius.

Sirius had a terrible habit of telling you all of the nasty things they overheard about you around the school, not because he enjoyed the sad look in your eye or the occasional quiver of your bottom lip, but because he would get so angry he simply couldn’t help himself. He felt as though he would be doing you a disservice if he didn’t make you aware of how more than half of the student body felt about you. But it began to get to the point where it became useless, you already knew, why was there any point in informing you every time?

And why was there an issue? Why was it such a bad thing that you enjoyed hooking up? It wasn’t like more than half of the male student body wasn’t doing the exact same thing you were. You were just having fun, enjoying your young years and reveling in the perks of not wanting to be tied down just yet. It made the Marauders blood boil, hearing people talk about you so terribly like they weren’t doing the same thing.

“Ecstatic.” Sirius exhaled, sending you a soft smile and a wink, causing you to smile again.

The three of you continued to walk arm in arm to the common room, chatting about nothing and everything, summer plans, classes, the handsome dark eyed boy Sirius has his eye on, Lily and James, and just about everything in between until you reached the fat lady.

Sirius muttered the password and you brought your hands to your sides, breaking the chain between the three of you, causing a chill to go down Remus’ spine at the lack of your touch, the spot on his arm now felt cold.

“There they are! S’my best mates!” James came tumbling down the steps leading to the boys dormitories, a loose tie hanging from his neck and hair tousled in all different directions.

“Are you drunk already?!” Remus questioned, stifling a laugh.

James held his hands up in surrender, “Wha’s a party without a little pre party right lads??” He laughed before bringing his hand up to point to you. “You!”

“Me?”

“You! Go change and meet us in our dorm! Pre party!!”

You had barely opened your mouth to respond before James spun around on his heel and was bounding up the steps again, impressively not tripping over his own feet, with Sirius not far behind, yelling at James about how he hoped he saved some for him.

 You and Remus stood next to each other for a moment, amused looks adorning both your faces at the childish excitement from your two best friends over a Hogwarts house party, before you eventually turned to each other and giggled, both sets of cheeks flashing with heat.

“I’ll see you at the party then?” Remus asked, assuming there was no way you’d come to sit in their messy dorm hours before the party started, forced to watch Sirius and James argue over spells and the best pickup lines.

You nodded. “See you there, Moony.”

–

Remus had been right, of course, you did not join the boys in their dorm for drinks, instead deciding to take a nap before getting ready and taking your time on getting ready, before taking a couple photos with your roommates and having a couple quick drinks with them.

By the time you made it downstairs to the common room, the party was in full swing, drinks cluttered the tables, students were crammed on the couches, and the smell of smoke and firewhisky quickly invaded your lungs. You couldn’t help but smile at the atmosphere, you adored parties. There was always just a lighthearted and carefree vibe around them, you get a couple drinks in you and suddenly everyone is your best friend, your cheeks hurt from smiling, and the undeniable urge to dance all just tie together to create the perfect feeling in your chest.

And it doesn’t hurt when there’s a certain cutie you have your eye on that you can flirt with all night.

“Looking lovely as always.”

You turned your head as your eyes landed on your best friend and you smiled, trying so hard to ignore the warm feeling of butterflies in your stomach as his deep brown eyes looked into yours, a soft smile playing at his lips.

“Why thank you, Mr. Lupin.”

“Please, call me Remus.” He quipped, extending a hand out to you to assist you in walking down the remaining steps, only then had you realized you were still on the stairs.

“As you wish.” You joked back, a wink flickering across your left eye, and Remus swore if he had had just a couple more drinks his legs would have turned to jello.

Once you had made it down to even ground, a drink was being shoved into your hand by James, who’s bloodshot eyes were paired nicely with the poorly wrapped joint hanging from his lips.

“Where’s Lils?”

You smiled and took a swig from your drink, light happiness bursting through your chest at the love your best friends shared, they were better for each other than you could’ve ever imagined. 

“Should be right behind me.” You said, turning your head slightly to see if your best friend had made her way out of your room yet, but the only sight you were met with was James clammering up the steps to check on his girl.

You shook your head and giggled before turning your attention back to the taller boy, who had the same humorous expression on his face.

“Shall we?”

“We shall.”

–

“I’m telling you! Those are the exact words that came out of her mouth!” Sirius argued to the gaggle of friends, who all weren’t listening, too occupied by their fits of laughter and the joyful tears running down their faces to listen to their friend.

The black haired boy pouted and fell against the handsome Ravenclaw he had been wrapped around all night, who cooed and kissed the side of his face, although an amused glint still sparkled in his eyes.

You hadn’t even remembered what the story was, but now you couldn’t stop laughing, being egged on by the cackles of the rest of the group, and you clutched your stomach.

The party had completely died out, leaving just you and your closest friends on the common room couches, exchanging stories and cigarettes as soft music sounded from the record player in the corner.

And Remus’ hands hadn’t left your skin all night. 

They were constantly somewhere, one on your waist, your lower back, swung over your shoulder, the back of your neck, and currently, softly gripping your thigh.

You turned to look at him, a bright smile still beaming on your face before you lazily rested your head against his shoulder, prompting him to press a kiss to your hairline.

“You are so beautiful.” He whispered so softly that even you almost missed it and you felt heat rising up in your cheeks, bringing your head up to face him again, this time a softer smile on your lips.

“Please never stop smiling.” He breathed out, his face turned serious, eyes filled with devotion and warmth, quickly flickering to your lips before they went back to your eyes.

And he had you.

“I feel sick.” You announced suddenly to your friends, shooting straight up to your feet, causing Remus’ hand to fall. “M’gonna turn in.”

“Oh, love! Would you like help?” Marlene asked, leaning forward and gripping her hands around the armrest of her seat, ready to up and help you, despite the curly haired brunette sitting on the floor between her legs.

Remus caught on. “No, Marlene, you stay here. I’ll help her.” He insisted, standing up beside you, his hand ghosting around your waist.

“You’re sure?” She raised an eyebrow and Remus nodded, trying his best to ignore the knowing smirks of his fellow Marauders.

“It’s no problem.”

“Alright.” She answered hesitantly, eyes flickering over to you. “Come fetch me or Lils if you need, yeah?”

You nodded and bid your friends goodnight, snaking your fingers through Remus’ while allowing him to lead you up the stairs.

You were both giggling and tripping over your own feet as you got closer to your room, but a certain heaviness weighed on your chest when you remembered what he most likely wanted from you. Even though Remus was someone closer to your heart, he was still a boy, and it was something that all boys wanted from you, because they knew they could get it.

Sex.

You didn’t entirely mind, enjoying the no strings attached one night stand every once in a while, but it got to the point where most guys at Hogwarts wouldn’t even look in your direction unless they had a lustful intent, and sometimes, that stung.

But, you still let Remus into your room, you still locked the large oak door so you’d be left alone by your roommates, who you were positive were spending the night elsewhere, and you still looked up at Remus expectantly, breathing slightly heavy from running up the stairs and only a little dizzy.

The sandy haired blond was hard to read, his eyes didn’t leave yours as he set down his bottle of firwhisky with a thud on Lily’s dresser, and he brought one hand to grip the side of your neck, his thumb stroking your cheek bone, and the other on your hip.

Your heartbeat quickened as you rested a hand on his chest, the other holding the opposite side of his neck.

It was agonizing, the way he studied you, the way he leaned in closer only to place a chaste kiss on your jaw, earning a soft sigh from you as you fluttered your eyes close.

“Fuck.” He whispered before his lips were on yours, soft and gentle, barely parted as his grip on you barely tightened, just holding you.

And he pulled away, just like that.

“(Y/n).” He whispered.

“Yes?” You breathed out, head still spinning from the feeling of his lips on yours.

“Jus’ sayin’ your name.” He replied, his eyes scanning over every feature on your face, before pulling you in for another kiss, and you took the liberty of deepening it, leading him over to your bed before he pulled away from you, his hands gripping your shoulders. “Woah, woah. Hold on, love.”

Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion as you looked at him, slightly cocking your head to the side.

“You don’t want-”

Remus felt his heart break.

You thought he just wanted to fuck you.

“Darling…”

“W- why did you kiss me, then?” You asked, confusion plastered all over your face, arms dangling at your sides as you waited for Remus to answer, and his intoxicated brain couldn’t get a response out fast enough.

“Oh god, oh god.” Your eyes widened in horror and this time it was Remus’ turn to be confused. “I completely misread the situation. Fuck!” You frantically rubbed at your eyes, smearing black eyeliner and mascara all over the delicate white sleeves of your top. “Oh god, I’m so sorry Remus. I- I thought you were flirting and-”

The brown eyed boy was completely helpless and didn’t know what else to do besides grabbing your face to kiss you once more, breaking apart only a second later to rest his forehead on yours.

“Just to kiss you.” He responded to your question.

“What?”

“I kissed you, because I wanted to kiss you, love.”

Your eyebrows raised in understanding, a look of uncertainty in your eye.

“Just to kiss me? Not to-” You gestured to the bed, but Remus cut you off.

“No.”

You could’ve cried, right in that moment, you could’ve cried. Did your best friend love you the way you loved him? Was this really happening?

“And, and if I told you I didn’t want to be touched?”

He smiled, “I’d say you look lovely.”

“And if I told you I just wanted to lay with you and cuddle?”

“Happily.” He breathed, a look on his face that said that was the only thing he’d ever want from you.

“If I said we’ll never have sex?”

Remus laughed and shook his head at you, “Darling, I wouldn’t care.”

You smiled, and sighed with relief, falling into him, and he gladly wrapped his arms around you, swaying you back and forth.

“Rem.” You said after a few moments, voice muffled by the material of his shirt.

He hummed in response.

“I think I’m in love with you.”

He couldn’t believe what he was hearing, he pulled away from you in disbelief, staring and studying your face, looking for any hint of sarcasm or humor, but there wasn’t one. But there was a tear running down your cheek, and Remus was quick to wipe it away.

“And I’m terrified.” 

He frowned as your bottom lip quivered and your eyes lowered to the floor, ashamed to look at him. But Remus brought your head up to look at him by placing his thumb and pointer finger on your chin.

“Nothing to be scared of, dove. I love you more than you could ever know. I’m with you.”

═════════════════

remus lupin taglist: @swaggieee @mystic-writings @fairydxll @agqrtz @milkiane @athenapotter @joebobisachickenfart @waszuka @moonlitmeeks @scandalous-chaos @maddisoninnit @perfectpoetryangel @lilytoyourjames @lavendersfairy @maraudershousewife @gallysonegoodlung @sadbluebarry721 @kaitieskidmore1 @icarus-star @spencersboybandhair @moonlighy @eichrnhouseproperty @h1ppieth1ngs @mirclealignr @pokey-hedgehog @stariightjoyy @rad-cool-huh @jellycolors @l0vley.lee

add yourself to my taglist

[m4tthewmurd0ck]

𝐄𝐧𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 ~ 𝐌𝐚𝐭𝐭 𝐌𝐮𝐫𝐝𝐨𝐜𝐤 𝐱 (𝐅𝐞𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐞) 𝐀𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫! 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

Thank you so much to @fairydxll for allowing me to participate in your 2k writing event! Congratulations on 2,000 followers, your writing is phenomenal and you deserve every bit of success :) I’ve got 2 prompts, “you are enough. a thousand times enough.” + “and where do you think you’re going?”

Context: ~ I am but a hoe for Avenger! Reader so, are we really that surprised?

~ Your powers are basically Wanda’s powers, plus presence concealment (aka invisibility). I don’t touch on it toooo much since this is mostly focusing on Matt + You, but I do reference a bit :) Also you wear a mask, only the team + Matt know who you are.

Word count: 10.3k (oops?! sorry in advance if you hate long one-shots. I genuinely have no idea how this got so fucking long hasdfkasdghasdg I just kept writing and writing and when I was finished it was basically like oh shit… but I couldn’t bring myself to remove anything.)

“—but isn’t Stephen a sorcerer?”

“EXACTLY!” Bucky slaps Sam on the back of the head, taking his usual seat next to you. For the past few missions, you’ve switched partners with Sam, he’s now with Steve while you’ve worked with Bucky.

Sam groans, leaning forward for just a few seconds to put his head in his hands. When he sits back up, he simply looks at the two of you, shaking his head. “The big three— it’s a thing. It’s a thing.”

“No…”

“Is it though…”

“It is. But I’ll let you two be wrong, for now. We’re almost there children, so come on, let’s try to focus on the mission.”

You and Bucky glance at each other, before turning to Sam and rolling your eyes.

“You need to stop that, that right there was creepy. You’re like twins or something… and it needs to stop.”

Steve breaks up your little bickering, coming over to fill Sam in on a slight change. You and Bucky already have your parts covered, so you take the time to pull a little slip of paper out of one of your pockets. While you do, you make a mental note to thank Yelena, the vest has added a nice touch to your suit.

As you read today’s poem, you try, and fail miserably, to conceal your smile.

You flood my thoughts / and wide awake dreams / I adore you to depths / beyond the eye can see. / ~ perry

Before you and Matt started dating, you mentioned how much you loved poetry. And when you two officially got together, Matt took it upon himself to type out poems and fold them up, leaving them in random places for you to eventually find.

The first time he hid one in your uniform, you mentioned afterwards that you found it on the quinjet while you guys were heading home. It had been a particularly rough mission, and reading those few lines was what helped you calm down. 

After that, Matt made it a point to make sure there was always a poem in one of your pockets. In fact, he was afraid that one day he’d be so caught up with work that he wouldn’t have time to print one out, so in one of the corners of his closet, underneath a pile of clothes was a small box that contained ones that he’d already printed. 

Despite the chaos you know is coming soon, you lean back in your seat and find yourself remembering when Matt found out you really loved poetry.

You were woken up by movement to your left. When you slowly opened your eyes and sat up, you quickly realized that Matt was having some sort of bad dream. As gentle as you can, you put your hand on his shoulder and give him a little shake.

“Matty,” you whisper. “Hey, you gotta wake up okay?”

He jolted up, sounding like he was nearly out of breath. He reached to his right, and when his hand made contact with yours, you could see him visibly relax. Without a word, you pulled him close, sitting up so that he could lay his head on your lap.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” You ran your hands through his hair, trying to bring comfort in any way that you could.

“I— tomorrow. Right now I just… I can’t.” He was terrified to tell you that his nightmare was about losing you. After meeting you, his bad dreams consisted of him losing you in some way. And tonight was worse than any other one before. “Sorry, I haven’t had a nightmare in a while.”

You’d been together for a few months now, and had just recently started occasionally spending the night at his place. He’d had a nightmare with you there once before, but quickly brushed it off saying that he simply had trouble sleeping. But with how open he was right now, you knew tonight must have been especially bad.

“You have nothing to apologize for my love, just remember that I’m here whenever you want to talk, okay?”

He nodded, and hummed with content at the feeling of your hands playing with his hair. After nearly 10 minutes of this, and you both enjoying the silence in each other’s company, it becomes clear that Matt won’t be falling asleep anytime soon. Glancing to the small table on your side of the bed, you spot the book you were attempting to read earlier. The sound of Matt’s key turning in the lock pulled you from the pages, and all thoughts of the book were quickly forgotten.

“Want me to read to you?” You ask softly, wondering if he’ll think that’s weird.

“Hmm?” He moves so that his head is still on your lap, but he’s facing up towards you, and you can’t help but smile as you look at the man you know and quickly came to love.

“Remember after our first date, you took me to a used bookstore because I said those were my favorite places to roam, but I had yet to find a good one in Hell’s Kitchen?” When he nods, you continue, “I said I would be quick because I didn’t want you to get bored following me around, but you told me to take my time because—”

“I’d follow you anywhere for as long as you’ll have me,” Matt smiles.

You continue, “you also distracted me quite a bit Mr. Murdock, stealing kisses every time we walked down a new aisle. And you asked who my favorite author was. I couldn’t tell you because choosing that would be like asking me to pick just one thing that I loved about you. There were too many to choose from.”

Matt sits up, this time pulling you into his arms. As he plants a soft kiss on your forehead, he remembers that day. “Then I asked what your favorite type of book was, and you were a lot faster in saying poetry books.”

“I was worried you might think I was lame. But when I saw your smile, I had a feeling you liked poetry too.”

“When we were walking home and you said you’d love to read me some of your favorite poems someday, I didn’t say it back then because I thought I might scare you off, but I knew I’d love that because my favorite sound was already your voice.”

How did you get so lucky, that the man holding you loves you more than life itself? He’s everything you could’ve ever asked for, and then some.

“So,” Matt pulls you from your little daydream, “will you read to me?”

He leans down slightly so that your foreheads are touching, and you give him a kiss, nodding. You move away from him for a few seconds, just long enough to grab the book.

“Okay, pick a number between one and—” you quickly flip to the end to see how many pages there are, “seventy-five”.

“Hmm… seventy-four.”

You flip through the pages, and smile when you see which one it landed on. After clearing your throat, you begin reading the poem, holding the book with one hand and still playing with his hair with the other. Matt wishes he could live in this exact moment forever.

(((this is a real poem, by clementine von radics. it’s actually the one i’m basing my peter parker x reader off of hehehe)))

“I am not the first person you loved. You are not the first person I looked at with a mouthful of forevers. We have both known loss like the sharp edges of a knife. We have both lived with lips more scar tissue than skin. Our love came unannounced in the middle of the night. Our love came when we’d given up on asking love to come. I think that has to be part of its miracle. That is how we heal. I will kiss you like forgiveness. You will hold me like I’m hope. Our arms will bandage and we will press promises between us like flowers in a book. I will write sonnets to the salt of sweat on your skin. I will write novels to the scar of your nose. I will write a dictionary of all the words I have used trying to describe the way it felt to have finally, finally found you. And I will not be afraid of your scars. I know sometimes it’s hard to let me see you in all your cracked perfection, but please know; whether it’s the days you burn more brilliant than the sun or the nights you collapse into my lap, your body broken into a thousand questions, you are the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. I will love you when you are still a day. I will love you when you are a hurricane.”

Your trip down memory lane is abruptly stopped the moment the quinjet touches the ground. You stretch as you stand up, pushing aside all thoughts that don’t have to deal with the mission. Every one that you all go on is dangerous to some extent, but this, a little more than usual. 

A couple of hours later, you’re all back in your seats heading home. It was a success, but none of you escaped completely unharmed. You got the worst of it though, and are dealing with bruised ribs, cuts on your forehead and cheek, and a possible concussion.

The four of you had managed to take down all but three guys. And you were so close to walking away without a scratch. Your telekinesis allowed you to attack from a distance, so you were able to defend yourself and occasionally help the others.

You’d made yourself invisible and were sneaking up on one of the bad guys, when you stupidly tripped over a body, breaking your concentration and revealing yourself. The guy you were trying to sneak up on immediately locked eyes with you. An evil grin appeared on his face as he picked up a spear, preparing to throw it right at you. Thankfully, Steve had just taken someone down and he looked up at the right moment. Just as the spear had been thrown, Steve acted quickly and threw his shield past you. It flew into the wall, and the spear that was meant to kill you instead bounced off the shield, landing on the floor.

Steve, being the mother hen that he is, checks on you so often that eventually Bucky gives up his seat so that he doesn’t get up and pace back and forth every ten minutes.

“Steven, I’m fine,” you laugh, gently pushing his hand away as he inspects a cut on your cheek.

“Ooooh the government first naaaame…” Sam whispers, covering his mouth and pretending he’s shocked.

Truthfully, all 3 men on the quinjet are worried about you. Of course everyone on the team is extremely close (except for Loki, but you were constantly pestering to join them to watch movies and bake cookies for special holidays, and you knew you were wearing him down), but since it was often you 4 on missions, they’d grown especially protective of you.

“I think we could use a distraction!” You clap your hands, drawing the attention of everyone. “James,” you put a hand on his shoulder, “can you re-tell my favorite story?” There was a twinkle in your eye, and he burst out laughing, knowing exactly what you were talking about.

“Wow now you’re both in troubleeeee…”

“Samuel.”

Hearing his first name, Sam dramatically unbuckles his seatbelt and falls to the floor. Bucky rolls his eyes, but begins telling the story.

“Okay so it was July of 1936. And I was taking this punk out to celebrate his eighteenth birthday,” Bucky motions to the man sitting across from him, whose face was already growing red just from those 2 sentences.

“We really don’t have to hear this—”

“Yes we do!” You and Bucky both exclaim.

This causes Sam to groan again as he finally sits back down, complaining about “when did the Tweedledee and Tweedledum join the Avengers?”

When Bucky finishes telling the story, you’re all in much better spirits. As you all sit back in your seats, enjoying the last leg of the flight before you’re all back at the compound, you’re grateful for the 3 of them. And the rest of the team, too. Sure, everyone bickers here and there, but apart from Matt, they’re all you have.

Speak of the devil (hehe), everything seems to remind you of Matt. The fourth time Steve checks on you, which is when Bucky was really thankful that he switched seats, you remember the first time you came home from a mission after you started dating. You were pretty injured, and Matt freaked out.

It was the first time that you’d be going on a 2 person mission. Previously, there were always at least 4 of you. You were partnered up with Steve, and it was supposed to be a quick mission that wouldn’t take more than 24 hours. You were going after a new underground weapons dealer. He was clever, in that he stuck to selling within small random towns that nobody would think twice about. Intel showed that he didn’t have a partner, so you both figured this would be easy.

But you severely underestimated the man. Steve quickly stepped in front of you once you entered the abandoned apartment building that you’d been told housed all of his weapons. Bullets started flying as soon as you entered through, and Steve held his shield up to protect you both. You used your powers to make you both invisible, and this allowed you enough time to walk around and get behind him as he frantically searched for wherever the hell you 2 went.

For the second time, you realized just how much this man was underestimated. Sure, intel reported that he didn’t have a partner. But he didn’t need one because he was enhanced. As he raised his arms with a gun in each hand, 4 more floated up and took aim at both of you. You backed up far enough that you now stood outside, and acted quick, you flung your arms out and managed to send 3 of the 6 guns flying across the room.

Unfortunately, a bullet still managed to graze your arm. You were on the second floor, and the surprise of being hit was enough to knock you right over the balcony. Luckily, you healed quickly since you were enhanced. You ended up walking away with, besides the bullet wound, bruised ribs, a small gash on your cheek, and a few cuts on your leg.

Steve had it worse than you, but still worried about you. And of course he blamed himself for letting you get hurt, even though you told him multiple times during the ride home that it wasn’t his fault at all, and you were glad you took some of the hits instead of him.

You sent Matt a quick text letting him know you’d be landing back in New York in a few hours, and you just had to give a quick rundown of what happened before you’d be heading to his apartment. You failed to mention just how injured you were, not really thinking anything of it because as far as getting hurt went, this was actually pretty tame.

After getting the green light from Dr. Cho (only after you promised to take it easy for at least the next 48 hours, because “you’re enhanced, not immortal”), you rushed to Matt’s place.

He was actually working, and nowhere near done with the paperwork for the day. But it was the first mission you’d gone on since you started dating, so when he mentioned that you were heading to his apartment soon, Foggy insisted that he take care of Matt’s paperwork so that he could go home and see you.

When you walked through the door, Matt pulled you in for a hug, but immediately let go when you winced and he could smell the blood. He began to panic, asking if he needed to take you to the hospital or at least call Claire.

It took a good 10 minutes for you to fully calm Matt down. Once he was no longer pacing back and forth worried about your injures, you took a quick shower, and afterwards let him feel your face to ensure there wasn’t anything Dr. Cho missed.

He spent the rest of the evening worrying, constantly zoning in on the sound of your heartbeat so that he could detect any change. That night as Matt held you in his arms and you were fast asleep, he wished that he could protect you from every bad thing.

The memory once again vanished when the quinjet touched the ground and Tony stepped into view, there to greet you all when you landed. He quickly ushers you inside to see Dr. Cho, who he called when he was notified that you all had taken off and were heading back. 

She examines you and concludes that your self diagnoses was correct. The concussion is minor, and she says that you won’t have to stay and be monitored. She applies a little bit of medicine to the cuts on your face, giving you extra in a small container and telling you that they’ll heal a lot faster if you apply it twice a day. 

You jokingly point out your enhanced healing, but she insists anyway. As for your bruised ribs, those just need time to heal. Hearing this, Tony benches you for the next three days, saying that he doesn’t want to see you so much as step foot inside the compound. 

You start to argue, but decide against it. Tony knows just as well as anyone that you can’t stand not being able to do anything, so he fills you in on the next mission, taking place four days from now.

After a short conversation with Dr. Cho and Tony, you promise to do as little as possible for the next week. Happy offers to drive you home, and you gratefully accept but ask if he’ll drop you off somewhere else instead.

Sam enters the room just then, a smirk on his face. “She’s not going home, she’s gonna go see her lover boy.”

Bucky, who was walking by and overheard him, steps into the room and punches Sam, pretending to gag.

You roll your eyes at both of them. “…yeah, please don’t call him that ever again.” 

After a few minutes of the 3 of you arguing over who the most annoying one is (you and Bucky ganging up on Sam and immediately saying that it’s him), Sam all but pushes you out the door and tells you to “just go make out with your lawyer boyfriend or whatever you do when you’re not here.”

Memories seem to be flooding your mind that day. Right before you leave, Dr. Cho asks you to wait a few more minutes while she quickly documents everything, just incase she has any additional questions to ask you. When she goes over to the computer by her desk, you think about the conversation you just had with Sam and Bucky. You loved that you guys could joke about each other’s personal lives. As you lean back in the hospital bed that Tony insisted you lay down on, you’re reminded of the first time you met Matt, told the team that you had a boyfriend, and the first time they met him.

Being that you were one of the youngest, only older than Peter, it was understandable that the whole team was fiercely protective of you. Once, you let it slip that the date you’d gone on a few days before just didn’t end up working out. The guy was too pushy, kept asking for a second date when that one had barely begun, and when you pulled away when he tried to kiss you at the end of the night, he leaned in again as if maybe you’d made a mistake.

Bucky immediately asked what the guys name was. You refused to say it, of course, knowing damn well why he was asking.

On a rare day off, you ventured to Hell’s Kitchen. Growing up, you were a Queens girl through and through, but had spent quite a bit of time in the area, as a few childhood friends used to live here. It was getting to be late evening, so you sent a quick text to Tony letting him know you’d be making one more stop and that you’d be back in time for dinner.

You stumbled upon a place called Josie’s, and decided what the hell, you’d have a beer before you went home. Alcohol had the same effect on you as it did on Bucky and Steve. That is to say, it had no effect at all. But you still enjoyed beer and liquor every now and then.

When you walked in, you briefly looked around before deciding to just take a seat at the bar. Unbeknownst to you, a pair of eyes followed you from the door to the stool.

“Dude I know you can’t see it, but you have to trust me. The hottest woman I’ve ever seen just walked in,” Foggy whispered, elbowing Matt.

You had to hide your laughter, you were far away enough that a normal person wouldn’t have been able to hear them.

“I— I’ll take your word for it,” Matt chuckled. He was suddenly glad that this was another evening where he decided to stay sober.

You ordered whatever was on tap, and briefly scrolled through your phone while you waited. Well aware that people were often judged for doing anything in public by themselves, you tried to seem occupied. After you finished your beer, you paid and gathered your bag and phone before exiting Josie’s.

When you took a couple of steps outside, Matt heard something fall out of your bag. He guessed it was your wallet, judging by the weight. He immediately got up, telling Foggy he’d be right back. As he bent down, he realized he was right, it was your wallet. He stood absolutely still for a few seconds, before being able to determine that you turned left once you were outside. As he walked quickly to catch up with you, he tried to come up with an excuse. The average person wouldn’t have been able to hear a small wallet hitting the ground from behind a closed door.

Deciding he’d say he was on his way out when he heard it fall, he called out to you. “Excuse me, miss? I think you dropped this.” When he heard you turn around, he held it out.

“What the—” you looked in your bag, then back at the wallet in Matt’s hand. “Thank you so much, I wouldn’t have realized I was missing it until I got all the way home.” You accept it gratefully, then sneak another look at the man who handed it to you. Wow, he’s handsome, was your first thought.

“Are you from around here?” It was partly a trick question. Matt was almost positive that you weren’t, because he would’ve remembered your voice. But Josie’s was usually only filled with regulars, people who lived around the area.

“Not too far away, I just had a day off so I wandered over.” You almost blurted it out, unsure of why you were so quick to trust this stranger. You were an Avenger, yes, but you wore a mask, so you couldn’t exactly go telling Matt that you lived at the Avengers compound. “I like Josie’s though, the last couple of bars I’ve gone too, it’s been a while but they were so loud I couldn’t even hear myself think.”

Matt nodded in understanding, knowing exactly what you meant.

“Dude!” Foggy stepped out of the bar, grinning ear to ear when he saw that Matt was talking to you. “Bring your new girlfriend inside man, they’re playing my favorite song!”

Turning red with embarrassment, Matt sheepishly turned back to you. “Sorry, that’s Foggy. He, umm—”

“Wants you to get back inside to hear his favorite song?” You smiled, stealing another glance at him.

“I think that includes you too though, you know being my new girlfriend and all.”

You laughed, and Matt found himself already falling in love with that sound. “Well in that case we should get back inside. I was just going to walk around a little bit more before heading home anyway. Can I buy you a beer, to thank you for returning my wallet to me?”

Matt held his arm out and you linked yours through. Now that you were closer to him, you mentally noted that you liked the smell of whatever cologne he was wearing. It wasn’t overpowering, it was mild, but it smelled nice.

As you walked back inside, Matt hoped that this wouldn’t be the last time he’d be seeing you. You ended up sending another text to Tony a little while after, letting him know you wouldn’t be back in time for dinner.

Foggy and Matt ended up being joined by a woman named Karen, who at one point whispered to Foggy that she had never seen Matt act this… happy, around someone he just met. She liked you for him already. When you got back to the compound, it was almost 9pm. As you took the elevator up to the 3rd floor, AKA your floor, you were surprised when you were greeted by the sight of Bucky, Sam, and Loki lounging on the couch in the living room.

“Nope. Not happening,” you ignored all 3 and headed straight for your room.

“Who is he?”

“What’s his first and last name?”

“Does he know we’ll kill him if he hurts you?”

You turned around, throwing your hands up before putting them on your hips. “Are we really doing this right now?”

“I want to meet him!”

“How did you meet him?”

“Yeah, bring him to the compound!”

That last statement caused you to burst out laughing. “I think the fuck not. You just asked me at LEAST ten questions in about fifteen seconds. No chance in hell I’m bringing him here anytime soon. Goodniiiiight,” with that, you quickly walked to your room, ignoring their protests (and more questions).

Of course they eventually all met Matt. After that first evening at Josie’s, before you left Matt worked up the courage to get your number. For the next week, you text pretty much all day and talked on the phone at least once a day, usually at night before bed. He ended the call on night 7 asking if he could take you out on a date. That was the start of the best thing that ever happened to you.

Once you’d been dating (but not officially labeling yourselves as a couple) for a month, you finally told him about you. Who you were when you put that black and red suit. You were surprised at how well he took it (though of course later you’d understand why). He was curious, but not in the way most people were where they asked questions like how many people you’ve killed or could they get Steve’s number from you. He heard on the news, and from Foggy, the kinds of missions the Avengers went on. You were touched at how much he genuinely cared.

After he officially asked you to be his girlfriend, when you came home from your 3rd date (as boyfriend and girlfriend), you were cornered in the living room on your floor.

“The September Foundation is having a gala next week,” Tony started out, “invite Matthew.”

You nearly choked on the glass of water that you’d just started to drink. “How the fu— does the whole team know his name??”

Tony shook his head, taking a seat at one of the tall chairs at the kitchen counter, motioning for you to sit next to him. “No, kiddo. You know I love you, and you’re like a daughter to me. In fact, I’d say you are my daughter. If you would like to be formally adopted and have Stark as your last name, just let me know. But when it was obvious you were spending so much time with someone who wasn’t one of us, I just wanted to make sure you were safe. Don’t worry I didn’t deep dive into his life, just wanted to make sure he didn’t have a long criminal record or anything like that.”

After a pretty lengthy conversation, you hugged Tony goodnight before heading off to take a shower. You couldn’t be mad at him, and you thought of him as a dad so you got where he was coming from.

The next day, you nervously asked Matt if he’d like to come with you to the gala. You mentioned that the whole team would be there, and you were secretly terrified that knowing that would scare him off and he’d make up some excuse about why he couldn’t go. But he surprised you by pulling you in for a kiss, and asking you what he should wear.

You knew how he got with large crowds sometimes, and you asked if he was sure he’d come with you. His response was one that made you swoon, if you wanted him to go, he’d be there. He shrugged, like it was the most simple answer in the world.

That night ended up being one of the best nights of your life. Everyone loved Matt, like you knew they would. You caught Bucky glaring at him a few times, but after you told him to fix his staring problem or you’d steal his metal arm because Okoye taught you how to remove it, he quickly stopped. Rocket walked by, and having overheard you, he said to name your price for teaching him how to steal that arm.

Bucky was mostly just keeping an eye on you though, only staring to try and work out if Matt could be trusted with you. By the end of the night, it was clear that he could be.

The next day, Bucky and Sam even admit to you that they’re really happy for you, and that Matt is a great guy.

“But please don’t kiss him in front of me again, not in front of my salad,” Sam shakes his head, pretending to shield his lunch from you.

As you’re walking towards the door to Matt’s apartment, you pull the spare key out of your bag. You slowly open the door, knowing that it’s pretty late and that Matt may be out as Daredevil, but he might also be asleep. Hearing a loud sigh of relief and being pulled into his arms the moment you shut the door behind you, you quickly realize that he’s waited up for you. 

“Thank God,” he whispers.

For a few minutes, you two simply stand there in each other’s embrace. You had called him before leaving the compound, but he hadn’t answered his phone so you just left a message.

“I’m okay, I promise,” you finally break the silence.

“But your ribs and your concussion, and your forehead is still bleeding—”

You step forward, putting your hands on either side of Matt’s face. “I’ll be back to normal within a few days, you don’t have to worry about me.”

When you run your hands through his hair, Matt sighs, having missed your touch even though you were only gone overnight. The night before a mission, you always slept at the compound since everyone usually liked to leave before the sun was up.

“Sweetheart, I’ll always worry about you,” Matt puts a hand under your chin, forcing you to look up at him. He leans in for a kiss, and you’re more than happy to oblige. “It’s pretty much part of my job as your boyfriend. Can I help you?” He gently caresses your cheek, careful not to touch the side with the small cuts.

When you nod, he gently grabs your hand and leads you to his bedroom. As you sit on the bed and remove your vest, he quickly goes to the bathroom and grabs his first-aid kit. You put a hand up to your forehead and when you look down at your fingers, there’s a little bit of blood. You hadn’t even felt it, but remembered that Matt could smell it which was how he knew you were bleeding.

Matt sits beside you, letting you guide his hand to where the cuts are. He’s extremely gentle as he’s wiping the blood off, and you’re once again reminded of how lucky you are.

“Thank you,” you say once he’s finished.

“You don’t have to thank me,” he kisses your uninjured cheek and goes to put the kit back under the bathroom sink.

You hear him turn the water on in the shower, and a minute later he comes back, saying he left a towel and clothes for you to change into. 

Fifteen minutes later, you exit the bathroom, already feeling a lot better. Your body still aches, but the hot water did wonders. Matt carefully applies the medicine to your face, and a few minutes later you’re both laying in bed, your head resting on Matt’s chest.

“Night Matt, I love you,” you say, and Matt smiles, loving how you sound when you’re half asleep.

“Night sweetheart, I love you more,” he leans down and kisses the top of your head. You’re so sleepy, that you mentally decide that he can win tonight.

When you wake up the next morning, you hear Matt in the kitchen cooking. Glancing at the clock, you’re surprised to see that it’s almost 11am. You genuinely can’t remember the last time you slept that late. You slowly raise your arms above your head to stretch, and are pleased that the ache in your ribs is almost completely gone. 

You head to the bathroom, smiling again when you look at your face in the mirror and see that the cuts are nearly gone too. You’re about to change into your outfit for the day, when you look at yourself in the mirror and decide you’d rather continue lounging around in Matt’s shirt.

As Matt stands in front of the stove, moving the freshly scrambled eggs from the hot pan to a plate just off to the side, you walk up behind him and wrap your arms around him, resting your head on his back. He puts the pan and spatula down and turns around, pulling you in to his embrace.

Once you’ve eaten, he works up the courage to ask you how the mission went. You give him the long-story-short version of events, skipping the parts where you received your injuries. Matt knew you got them, but you knew he’d only get angry if he learned how. You mentioned that at one point you were almost hit from behind, but Steve was quick to throw his shield, and as it flew by you it took the hit of the massive spear that had been headed your way.

Hearing how well you all work as a team, seeming to just know when someone else needs help even though they haven’t said anything, he’s glad you have them. In the beginning he had been a little wary, especially when missions mostly consisted of you, Bucky, Sam, and Steve. But you managed to drag him to the compound one evening when Tony was throwing yet another party, and he was quickly put at ease. Everyone was so nice to him, and you weren’t at all surprised when he and Yelena hit it off, they both had a pretty similar sense of humor.

Unbeknownst to you, Matt’s thinking of what you’ve just told him. While you’re filled with happiness and warmth, he’s filled with happiness and… a bit of anxiety? It comes as a surprise to him.

“Matt?” You pull him from his thoughts, noticing his facial expression.

“Yes? Sorry, just daydreaming I guess.”

You get up and clear the table, quickly washing the dishes. When you’re finished, Matt’s still sitting at the table, seemingly deep in thought. You quickly grow worried, not able to remember the last time you’ve seen him like this.

“Hey, talk to me,” you say softly. Holding one of his hands, you lead him over to the couch. When he sits down, he immediately pulls you close, as if needing to reassure himself that you’re there, that you’re alive and you made it home to him.

He’s almost afraid to ask, but he has to know. “When do you have to go in?”

“Well Tony benched me for three days, so the next mission isn’t until four days from now. I was going to wait to tell you later today. It’s an undercover assignment but a lot of that time is surveillance and then the team is joining us for the actual takedown, so it shouldn’t take more than a week.”

Hearing this, Matt is instantly filled with dread. “D-do you think that’s the best idea?”

“What?”

“Going on a big assignment the day after you’re cleared?”

He usually doesn’t question things like this and normally always tells you that he trusts your judgement, so you have no idea where this is coming from.

“I mean… it’s not that big of an assignment—”

“Where?”

You think for a moment, trying to remember the location that Tony mentioned. “Marseille, France.”

“Who’s the target?”

“A pretty big weapons dealer. I’m just posing as a new neighbor, my only job is to stay home and keep an eye on things, reporting on when anyone comes or goes from the house next door. That’s why it’ll take a week, I need a little time to establish if there’s a pattern or a schedule.”

“Can’t someone else go?”

Now you’re really confused. “While it’s just surveillance Bucky will be there too, Nat and Sam are both gonna drop by at different times, posing as friends coming to see our new place. Steve’s posing as a neighbor at the end of the street. I won’t be alone if that’s what you’re worried about. And once the week is up, Tony and Bruce are joining us to—”

“That’s— that’s not what I’m worried about,” Matt sighs and runs a hand through his hair. “I…”

“What, I can’t help you if you won’t tell me what’s really going on. You’ve never questioned me before a mission.”

He stands up and begins pacing back and forth.

“Matt—”

“You almost died today!” He finally stops and faces you.

You stand up and approach him, feeling hurt when he pulls his hand out of your grasp and takes a step back.

“This isn’t the first time. You know what I do, and what about when you go out at night—”

Matt shakes his head. “This isn’t about me. You talk about how you guys are a team, and look out for each other. There were three other people there with you. And only one caught the fact that you were about to get hit. What if Steve hadn’t been there? You wouldn’t be standing here right now.”

“Woah. Back up. Are you blaming Bucky and Sam right now?”

“No. I’m not. I just,” he sighs, trying to contain his feelings. “From what you’ve told me about this mission, and the ones before it, you’ve never come this close to death. You’ve been able to defend yourself, and you always see it coming. What if Steve had thrown his shield just half a second later? Or what if he’d been using it to fight of someone and no one was able to get to you in time?”

“I don’t understand what you want me to do right now,” you stand up, throwing your hands up. “You don’t think I know that I almost died? That I didn’t think about it most of the ride home? And how do you get to stand there and lecture me and talk about me putting myself in danger when you do the same thing every fucking night?”

Matt hears it in your voice, you’re on the verge of tears. He wants nothing more than to pull you into his arms, comfort you, and tell you it’ll be okay. But he can’t shake the thought that you almost didn’t come home to him today, that your life was only spared because Steve happened to notice and throw his shield at the exact right moment.

“Let me ask you this,” you continue. “And please do not bullshit me. If the Avengers hadn’t gotten word of the guys we just took down, if they were located in Hell’s Kitchen instead of somewhere on the West coast, would you have tried to take them down by yourself?”

“I—”

Now you’re getting heated. “Would you have told me, would you have asked for help and let me bring the team in for assistance? Or would you have waited until I fell asleep one night and then you’d sneak off to deal with them yourself?”

Just from the change in your tone, Matt knows he’s in deep shit. And he hadn’t even considered how you felt when he went out at night.

Not bothering to wait for a response, you walk over to the kitchen counter and grab your wallet, phone and keys. “I don’t know where you expect this conversation to end up, but I’m gonna go.”

Before you pull the door open, Matt reaches out, grabbing your wrist. “And where do you think you’re going?”

You resist the urge to roll your eyes. He’s acting like this, and has the nerve to seem surprised that you’re leaving?

“To the compound. I was looking forward to a nice night at home with you, but maybe it’s better if I just go. I’ll come back tomorrow if you’ll actually sit down and talk with me.” You take your phone out of your pocket, preparing to call an Uber and text Tony to let him know you’ll be coming by. You know he wasn’t serious about you staying away from the compound anyway.

You were one of the only ones that didn’t live there despite having your own floor, and frequently stopped by during time off. Tony even paid the rent for your apartment, at his insistence because you’d gotten a 2 bedroom place and every once in a while you’d have a guest if someone needed a little space from the craziness.

Suddenly, Matt’s scared. He needs you to understand why he’s acting like this, and he’s terrified to let you walk out that door not knowing. “Wait, please. I— I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have reacted like that.”

Matt senses your hesitation, your internal debate of do you ignore him and leave or stay and hear him out. And you’re also remembering the promise you made to each other. So he grabs your hand, gently coaxing you to turn around. When you do, he pulls you close, and you’re surprised to see tears in his eyes. During the years you’ve known Matt, you can count the amount of times you’ve seen him cry on one hand.

The first time was when he told you he was Daredevil. The fact that you almost immediately pulled him in to your embrace and said you loved him made him break down. He was so sure you’d get up and leave.

“You’ve known that I’m an Avenger for months now, and apparently you only just now decided I could be trusted,” you sunk down onto the floor, trying to process your boyfriends confession.

“No no sweetheart that’s not it I swear. Of course I trust you, I trust you with my life.”

“You distrust me enough to hide such a big part of your life,” you mumbled.

He tries to hide the nerves when he speaks again. “I was scared. I thought you’d hate me. You’re a hero, everyone loves you. I… I do things my own way, not always operating within the law.”

“And you thought I’d leave you over this?”

When he doesn’t respond, you looked up, realizing that Matt had taken a seat on the floor across from you, and that he’d removed his glasses and was trying not to cry.

“Oh Matty,” you go over to him, putting your hands on either side of his face, “you’re it for me. I don’t want anyone else. I’m upset that you kept this from me for so long, but that doesn’t mean I’m going anywhere. You’re stuck with me. I love you.”

The second time was when he came home one night, not quite on the brink of death but still severely injured. You guys had a minor argument earlier that morning and he ended up storming out of his apartment. You had waited as long as you could but eventually you had to leave or you would’ve been late for the mission. It was a quick one and you were back before midnight. You had debated going back to your apartment, but something was telling you to still go to his place. When you did, you nearly burst into tears at the sight of him getting up from the couch. He had changed back into normal clothes, but there was still blood on his face. As soon as he heard you unlock the door, he was up and nearly crushing you in a hug.

It was such a stupid argument, you genuinely didn’t even remember what it was about by the time you got back to Matt’s apartment. You almost thought about asking Nat to cover for you on the mission, but knew that would be pointless. She’d do it in a heartbeat, but then you’d just end up sitting alone in the apartment all day, waiting for your boyfriend to come home.

The mission was a relatively easy success. You, Yelena, and Peter had been sent to take out some low level weapons dealers, these guys thankfully not being enhanced like the one you encountered with Steve. You and Yelena were older than Peter, but because you looked so young, it was the perfect cover. You posed as some rich kids wanting to get their hands on some guns.

The disguises worked just well enough to get you through the door, but then one of the guys thought he recognized Yelena, so he pulled her hat and sunglasses off. You and Peter’s stood far enough behind her in the shadows that nobody even got a glimpse of you. Within seconds, you both slipped your masks on and joined Yelena in taking down the 6 men. Tony had been completely against sending you all, what with you being his honorary children and whatnot, but Fury overrode his decision, saying he needed to have a little more faith in you.

This time, you walked away with only a small cut just above your right eyebrow. Your ribs hurt a little, but the kick you received was so weak (thanks to Yelena who yanked the man back by his jacket), that you didn’t even think they were bruised.

On the ride home, things were silent. But you were all smiling. It was the first time the 3 of you had been sent on a mission together without anyone else to help, and you were proud that it was a success. Peter especially, because you were the first one after Tony to really get to know him, and he quickly came to view you as an older sister. He wanted to impress you, and knowing he did that was better than the feeling of Tony removing the training wheels protocol on his suit all those years ago.

Just before the quinjet landed, you debated on what to do. Everyone was always asking you to come to the compound for a sleepover. They knew you had your own floor, of course, but you were an amazing cook and they all knew that whatever kitchen you were in, that was where the leftovers got stored. Bucky, offered to kick Sam out so that you could take his place. Pietro offered to kick Wanda off of their floor so that you could take her place too.

As tempting as it was to spend the night with your team, which you did genuinely love to do, deep down there was only one place you wanted to be, and it wasn’t your apartment, either.

After quickly showering and changing because you needed a moment to decompress before going home to see Matt, you said your goodbyes to everyone and headed out the door. You often lost track of time, right now being one of those instances. It wasn’t until you slid the spare key he gave you into the lock, that you glanced at your watch and realized it was midnight.

Matt had gotten home at about 4pm. It was a long day at work, but he quickly rushed home to wait for you. He wanted to call and text you, but knew you were currently on a mission and he would’ve never been able to forgive himself if the sound of your phone going off with a notification from him, was enough to distract you and you got hurt. So he basically twiddled his thumbs and cleaned his already clean apartment for a couple of hours, hoping it would make time go faster.

As soon as the sun went down and it was dark, he put on that red suit and decided at the last minute to go out. You’d told him that the mission was all the way on the West Coast, so you’d probably be a while anyway.

He soon realized going out was a mistake. Although he managed to save a couple of people, he also took quite a beating. He was off his game, only able to think of you and how the last thing he did with you was argue. After standing on a random rooftop for nearly 10 minutes and not hearing anybody in need of help, he headed home. As he undressed and changed back into regular clothes, you crossed his mind yet again.

It terrified him. That if something had happened to him tonight, arguing would be the last memory that you had.

When you finally walked through the door at 12:01am, he didn’t think he had ever felt such sweet relief.

When you laid eyes on him, you wanted to cry. Although he was just in sweatpants and a plain t-shirt, he hadn’t yet wiped the blood off of his face. As he struggled to get up from the couch, you rushed over to him, dropping your bag by the door. When you touched his face, he immediately leaned into your hand, finally allowing himself to cry.

As you asked what was wrong, all he could do was stand up and pull you into his arms. He never wanted to let you go again.

“I’m sorry sweetheart, I’m so sorry,” he mumbled, feeling a sense of peace now that you were there with him.

“I’m sorry too Matt, I shouldn’t have—”

Matt shook his head, effectively silencing you with a kiss. “You have nothing to apologize for. I shouldn’t have stormed out like that. The whole day, all I could think about was you. And I don’t ever want to leave if either of us is angry again. God, if something had happened to you I… I don’t know what I would’ve done.”

You dried his tears, placing a soft kiss each time you wiped his face. “I’m okay, I promise I’ll always do whatever it takes to come home to you. No more leaving upset. Now come on, let’s get you cleaned up, hmm?”

And it really did change. If things were tense, or you were in even a small disagreement about something, you sat and talked it out. Neither of you ever left the other angry again. Even on occasions where you argued when you were apart, every phone call or video chat still ended with I love you.

The most recent time he cried was when you’d convinced him to take a day off from work, after triple checking with Foggy that he and Karen could run things on their own for a day. You smiled fondly as you remembered that whole day.

If Matt was asked, he’d immediately say that it was one of the best days he has ever had. Not quite the best day, he was saving that title for when he got to marry you.

It took lots of convincing arguments and pleading, but he had finally agreed to take a random day off. You called Foggy the night before, and as soon as you told him what you had planned, he told you that if Matt so much as stepped foot into the office the next day, he’d take you to court.

With every little thing and activity you did, Matt was reminded of how lucky he was.

You started out by bringing him breakfast in bed, which he said you’d better be careful because he could very quickly get used to this kind of treatment. Afterwards as you were doing the dishes, Matt stole you away from the kitchen for a few minutes when he put a record on and led you to dance in the living room.

He got butterflies when he laid on the couch with his head in your lap, and you read to him from your favorite book. Yup, he thought to himself, if I die right now, I will die a very happy man.

The entire day was perfect, both of you secretly surprised that not a single thing went wrong.

You had him wait on the couch, saying you had a few more surprises in store. After a few minutes, you returned and led him to the bathroom. As he undressed you turned the water on in the tub, then discarded your clothes and joined him in the shower while you waited for the water to fill the tub. It was so intimate, but not in the sexual way that you blushed just thinking about. As you ran your fingers through his hair, helping him wash and then condition it, he sucked in a breath. You were so fucking good to him.

While rinsing off, you lightly traced the scars on his face and chest, kissing each one and whispering things like how you loved him, you were proud of him, and you wished you could take his pain away. He nearly broke down right then and there, but managed to hold it in.

But after when you both had dried off and you surprised him with delivery from his favorite takeout place, followed by laying in bed while he was the little spoon this time, and you ran your hands through his hair while he listened to your heartbeat, his head resting on your chest. You softly spoke about all of your favorite memories, and all the things you loved about him. It had been years since he’d felt this kind of love and eventually he gave in and let himself cry. You were worried you upset him, but he told you it was the opposite. He couldn’t believe how lucky he was, you loved him no matter what, and you cared for him in a way no one else did.

That was on your mind right now. You wanted to leave and maybe decompress separately before things got too heated and you broke out into a full blown argument. But you remembered the promise you made to each other, and Matt was terrified. That if you walked out that door, something would happen. Now he’s determined to do whatever it takes to talk this out with you.

“Please,” he’s nearly on the verge of tears right now, prepared to get on his knees and beg you to stay and talk to him, if that’s what it’ll take.

“Matty,” you say sadly, “I don’t want to leave. But you’re not making any sense right now, and I don’t want to stay if this is going to turn into some huge fight. I love you, and I don’t want to fight with you.”

That last sentence does him in, he falls to his knees, wiping the few tears that managed to escape.

“Matt,” you try again. Joining him on the floor, you kneel in front of him as he moves himself to a sitting position, clearly trying to hold back more tears. “What is it?”

“I just… I can’t stop thinking about how I almost lost you. And I know, I go out at night and do what I do, and that’s not the worst fight you’ve been in. But that’s exactly what terrifies me. I know when you get hurt you can go to the compound and Dr. Cho helps you, and you heal faster than the average person, but I, I feel so helpless. What if I’m not enough to take care of you, and I’m so scared that one day something will happen, and it’ll be my fault. What if one day it’s just you and I, and something happens and I can’t protect you? You are without a doubt the best thing that has ever happened to me. I can’t lose you.”

Finally, you understand. It’s about so much more than you putting yourself in harms way, and more than the people you work with. He’s doubting himself, too.

“Hey,” you pull him to a standing position, and take his hand, leading him to the bedroom. Without a word, he gets in on his side of the bed and holds his arms open, waiting for you. You climb in and get under the covers, and he immediately pulls you close. “Remember that promise you made me? And I made it right back? I will always do whatever it takes to come home to you. And I know you don’t know everyone else that well, but I trust them with my life, just like I trust you. They would never send me anywhere if they thought I’d be killed. We only go in solo or in pairs if we know we have the upper hand, or it’s just surveillance and intel. If we don’t, it’s all hands on deck and nobody ever fights alone.”

You feel him relax a little, comforted by your words. “And, my love, I promise that you are enough. A thousand times enough. I love you more than anyone else in the world, you’ve been it for me since the moment we met. No one loves me or cares for me the way that you do. I know you doubt yourself, but I promise you have no reason to. You are the best man I know, and I’m so lucky that I have you in my life, and even luckier that you love me too. I’m so sorry that you’re feeling this way, and I wish I could take all of those bad thoughts away from you. I wish that you knew yourself like I do. I know that you often think about your mistakes, or things that you should’ve done, but when I look at you, all I see is the man I love. The man that puts everyone before himself, and fails to realize how amazing he is.”

“Sweetheart,” Matt tries to find the words, “I don’t know what I did to deserve you, but I just need you to know that I am so thankful for you, every day. Even if we’re mad at each other, or something else, I’m grateful for you always. You’re so good to me,” he puts his hand under your chin, tilting your head up and causing you to look at him.

“I loved you from the moment we met, even if I didn’t know it was love back then. But do you know the exact moment I realized I was in love with you?” You can’t remember if you ever told him this.

He’s curious. “When was it?”

You smile, looking back on that evening. “We’d been together about two weeks, you invited me over one night for dinner. I was a little late because we’d just gotten back from a mission, but I hadn’t had a chance to tell you I was going to be late. I rushed straight from the compound, not even bothering to change because I was so excited to see you. And when you opened the door you immediately sensed something was wrong. I thought I could get away with the cut on my cheek because you wouldn’t be able to see it. But that was before, you know, before I knew.”

“And before I knew you were an Avenger,” Matt plants a soft kiss on your forehead.

“Yeah, now you’re one of the lucky few. I just remember you being so worried, it struck me as odd how calm you were but again, I didn’t know that other part of you yet. You were so gentle, making absolute sure I was okay before finally leading me to the dining table. And even though I know you weren’t actually looking at me, after when you held me close and you leaned down and put your forehead against mine, it was like there was this moment where I knew I was in love with you.”

“I don’t know what I did to deserve you, but I love you so fucking much.”

“I love you more,” you whisper, moving to a sitting position. You lean down and Matt is quick to pull you in for a kiss.

“Not possible,” he smiles. “That’s one argument I’m never going to let you win.”