#ru.rambles

[tinyevilgremlin]

there's just something about how, through wang qing's voice, cheng xiaoshi breathes life into his own feelings,

"just due to some difference, i've been judged, ignored, and bullied by everyone around me."

the bullying wang qing faced may have been for a different reason, but it's bullying nonetheless, it's these teenagers harming and holding power over another "just due to some difference", it's what happened to a young cheng xiaoshi after his parents left him, it's what continues to happen to so many children and teenagers all because they're perceived as "different", and others deem this difference as "wrong", as enough of a reason to justify their cruel behaviour.

these lines are universal in that sense, anyone who's been on the receiving end of such ostracization, of such hurt and humiliation, would relate to it, and this is why it's just so, so cathartic when he has this outburst — lc lays emphasis not only on his heartbreak at being abandoned, but also everything else he has had to endure because of said abandonment.

[tinyevilgremlin]

something something about how link click presents us our central protagonists as characters who are both unable to move on; cheng xiaoshi from a past that he cannot change, and lu guang from a future that he cannot accept — cheng xiaoshi refused to budge from that empty house in hopes of seeing his parents again, lu guang refuses to live in a world that would allow his best friend to die

[tinyevilgremlin]

rewatched this scene and it's got me in my feels again

the way lu guang's eyes widen once cheng xiaoshi's frame comes into focus, the way he instinctively tears up as if he cannot believe it's real—which in a way it isn't, because this is an alternate timeline where nothing has gone wrong yet, and that makes it hurt all the more—but still, still, still.

he's just watched cheng xiaoshi die. but now he's standing right in front of him, and when he reaches for his hand, holds onto his wrist, it's warm, he's real, and the realisation leaves him so choked up that all he can manage is a weak, unconvincing whisper of "i'm okay", even though he clearly isn't, but he also is, because cheng xiaoshi is still here, still in front of him. and that's all that matters, that's the reason he's doing this.

also, not a parallel or anything but something something about cheng xiaoshi's hand holding onto lu guang's when he died and lu guang's hand holding on to cheng xiaoshi's in this scene

[tinyevilgremlin]

the way justitia's love for daon grows stronger with each passing episode, as she cries with him, worries for him and feels for him — just as daon himself reaches a point where he has stopped caring about whatever happens to him, ready to throw himself into the pits of hell for vengeance. just something so tragic about this whole turn of events

[tinyevilgremlin]

yingdu ep5 spoilers

the irony, the cruel and soul-shattering irony of that scene between cheng xiaoshi and his father. augh.

cheng xiaoshi had been longing for a person who had already severed ties with him. even though his father claims he loves his son, the vague finality of the manner he speaks in—

"but i wasn't a good father. as parents, we're supposed to guide our kids. maybe fate brought me to you all so i could make up for my mistakes."

—it's almost as if he calls cheng xiaoshi one of those mistakes, and the past tense almost makes one believe he no longer even has any intention of going back. he views it as a chapter closed, whereas cheng xiaoshi had been reading the pages over and over for years, with desperate hope for its continuation, or an end, even.

and the voice acting throughout this scene. why don't you just rip my heart out instead

[tinyevilgremlin]

yuumori 67. that’s it. that’s the post.

[tinyevilgremlin]

i just can't get over how this is, quite literally, the brightest and happiest he has looked in this entire show — AND THEN THEY PROCEED TO TAKE THAT SMILE AWAY RIGHT AFTER

[tinyevilgremlin]

oh the way she keeps telling him to drop dead, completely unaware that he is, in fact, going to die in three months or less... this is going to hurt isn't it

[tinyevilgremlin]

the parallels again </3

[tinyevilgremlin]

words cannot explain what this scene did to me

LIKEEE. those smiles brimming with pure joy? the way they're holding each other? the overall warm colour grading with that gorgeous backdrop? just. everything about this. and they say romance is dead

[tinyevilgremlin]

not sure about the love language but if this isn’t literally justitia

[tinyevilgremlin]

funny (and ironic) how daon and justitia are both veering into dangerous territories of their own — giving in to the very thing that is forbidden in their respective worlds — because of each other and in spite of their own selves

[tinyevilgremlin]

do you just think about daon and justitia at any random time of the day and let out the most unhinged giggle ever or are you normal

[tinyevilgremlin]

bitna (justitia), a demon, getting to experience the whole spectrum of emotions because of daon, a mere human, is an absolute delight to watch

[tinyevilgremlin]

the judge from hell / ep12.

oh that scene where daon walks up to justitia, hugs her, and then breaks down sobbing. my heart t.t

he’d just faced his family's and soyeong's killer, and what ensued was the cruelest conversation ever, with J literally mocking him in the face by detailing how he killed soyeong. kim jaeyoung’s performance is excellent here — the conflict, the sheer sorrow-fueled fury and rage that burns in his eyes as he comes close to killing taegyu, and yet, he can’t. this man, who so mercilessly killed his dear ones is now at his mercy, yet, he ultimately does the right thing, because he trusts justitia, and because he’d made that promise to soyeong. because he’s still a human, bound by the laws of the mortal realm, and he makes the decision to adhere to them even if every fibre in his body may scream otherwise.

which is also exactly why i love this little scene so much:

it’s something he really needed to hear, and i love that it comes from this angel who’s been watching over him for all these years — it just feels all the more fitting and beautiful.

when all is said and done, and he sees justitia there, standing in the distance waiting for him, that’s when the dam breaks — the moment where the walls come crashing down, and so do years of pent up emotions, and relief. relief that it’s over, or at least so close to it.

there are no words shared, no words needed; only silence that’s punctuated by daon’s sobs as justitia simply stands there, holding him and patting his back in a gesture of comfort. without even realising it, she, a demon, has become his safe space — an existence that he can call ‘home’, after having lost his own twice.

[tinyevilgremlin]

the judge from hell / ep10.

the way she hugs him as if he's her whole world, the fear and subsequent relief in her eyes almost tangible.

this week gave us justitia at her most vulnerable yet, fighting tooth and nail to save the only being she has ever loved, the only human who has been able to breathe a semblance of life and warmth into her cold, dormant demon heart. this is the first time she is seriously faced with the possibility of daon dying, and fear hits her with full force—the fear of losing a loved one. and the first thing she does after the fight with paimon? run to daon, hug him and let him know that she is going to protect him with all she has.

also ironic how daon is the one all bloody and battered, but it's justitia's heart that seems to bleed at the sight of him this state. and then daon gently taking her hurt hand in his and slightly caressing it.. it's just all so gentle, and vulnerable, this whole scene, and my heart is in pieces again, thank you writers