#rs: die knowing that your life was my life's best part.

[v-arbellanaris]

no one tagged me btw i just did this myself but. oc kiss from this picrew for my da ocs. im obsessed... more info under the tag

evadne/leliana | evadne/morrigan | faris/tamlen

kal/alistair | kal/zevran | kal/loghain

aedan/morrigan | aedan/leliana | aedan/anora

anders/miranda | rowan/fenris

lysander/anders | amalia/isabela | joan/sebastian

muna/merrill | muna/anders

isra/cullen | isra/mahanon

solas/marya | iskandar/cassandra

iskandar/solas | iskandar/jurian ( @dellamortethelesser's amell oc )

hala/lucanis | roisin/emmrich

roisin/neve | roisin/davrin

[celiastjamesoscar]

OMG A GRACE FIC!! MY LIFE IS COMPLETE AGAIN! I just came home from the concert and it was amazing but during it I saw that you posted and since then I was more excited for your story! Let's go girls!

If Wednesday Addams is willing to put up with loud music and a crowd of people for you then congratulations, you will get married. That's some serious dedication and love from Wednesdays side. R is the perfect mix of Wednesday herself and her polar opposite. She can keep up with Wednesdays unique personality while also bringing her out of her comfort zone a bit. Wednesday has never experienced being in love herself and since she desperately tries to avoid becoming like her parents, she's closing herself off from developing feelings. That is why she chose to have this friends with benefits situation. Though late night kisses and walks together sure is very much like dating. Wednesday just needs a bit more time/a slight push until she realizes that she's indeed in love.

Aww, Wednesday wants R to die a slow and gory death so that she will never forget that beauty. In Wednesdays world this is the most romantic thing ever!!

Enid is the best!! She's saying it like it is. And, aside from R, she's the only one who gets away with talking to Wednesday like she does.

AAAAH THE HAUNTING OF HILL HOUSE!! MOVE ASIDE WEDNESDAY, I WILL MARRY R!!

Damn. Wednesday kinda made the relationship official already. With the walks together, the exclusivity and now the necklace with her initial. That's her way of claiming R and starting a relationship. She already cares so much about R and needs to have her in her life. Shes already being affectionate towards R. Wednesday is just a bit hesitant to make it official because she can't verbally express her true feelings. So she's doing it via different actions and her own special wording. Others may find it weird but if you truly know and understand Wednesday then it's clear that she loves R.

Lol R is the key to proving that Wednesday also feels "normal" human emotions. I love it. But don't we all have anger and homicidal thoughts? Look at Stinky and Sam. We still love them, so just be yourself Wednesday and make this relationship official already!

The banter between R and Wednesday is perfect!! It's so funny but still so Wednesday like. Poor girl is trying her best to keep her true feelings hidden and R is just enjoying the ride.

LOL NOT R CRUSHING ON MORTICIA!! Same though. I love Rs confidence and her ability to not only flustered Wednesday but also outsmart her with her remarks and wit.

“We are not in a romantic relationship at all. We are just two acquaintances who engage in romantic activities from time to time" Okay Miss Girl, that is literally the definition of a couple but go off I guess.

OMG THE ENDING!!! Wednesday can't VERBALLY admit her love just yet be she sure can write it!! I love it!

God, I really missed you writing for Wednesday. Every time I'm blown away by your wording and the way you manage to perfectly capture the atmosphere/overall mood of Wednesday. It's like you had a part in writing an episode of the show because this story feels just the same.

Wednesday Addams is many things, and that includes being a simp. It runs in her blood. R is just like Wednesday in a sense, and that terrifies Wednesday, but she can’t help but be drawn to R. Wednesday will definitely be getting that small push to chase after R, but that won’t happen for a little while; shes a stubborn woman

Wednesday as such a way with words, doesn’t she? She’s so charming in the most macabre way

Enid is about to be the best wingwoman we have ever seen. Just give her a kit of pastels and some Seventeen tickets and she will have Wednesday and R together by the end of the week

Wednesday has yet to see the Flanagan verse, but she will soon fall in more love with R once she does

The necklace is my favorite detail about the dynamic between Wednesday and R: it’s a silent way of Wednesday showing her affection without having to verbally admit her feelings. Just wait for the family breakfast when Morticia sees the necklace 😼

Wednesday knows that she has a soft spot for R, and that makes her feel things she shouldn’t, like normal emotions. We will get to see more of their interactions when Wednesday wants to engage in her murderous behavior

R’s whole mindset is, “I’m going to annoy you until you either kill me or marry me. I’m fine with whichever option.”

WHO WOULDNT CRUSH ON MORTICIA?!?! I have had the fattest crush on Catherine Zeta-Jones since ‘The Mask of Zorro’ and I am projecting onto R a little bit. R is definitely going to purposely make Wednesday jealous throughout this series, so buckle up!

Wednesday is a bit confused when it comes to relationships, but she will figure it out

Just wait for the angst that’s going to come because of that ending…

I’ve also missed writing for Wednesday!! She’s probably my favorite to write for because she’s been a character I have followed since I was knee high to a grasshopper. Tom Burton needs to make Wednesday a woman kisser or I might actually go insane

[moonraccoon-exe]

OKAY, I MAY BE AN IDIOT, BUT GUYS, TODAY I JUST BEAT ALL 15 TRIALS IN HORIZON ZERO DAWN WITH THE MAX SCORE.

I AM THE SHIT.

PET ME.

[haikyu-hoe]

You’re safe now

Tsukkishima Kei x reader

one shot, angst-ish but fluff (happy ending)

⚠️ warning ⚠️ mentions of s*lf h*rm, sc*rs and su*cidal thoughts. please do not read if you feel like this might trigger you !!

Hope you guys enjoy this more angsty fanfic, dm if you have any requests xx

———————————————————————

You’re a first year at Karasuno. Everyday has been the same since the beginning of the year. Each morning you wake up to this feeling of emptiness that’s slowly eating you alive. At this point, you don’t even know why you get up in the morning anymore.

It’s not like anymore cares, right? Sure you do have a few friends, but they probably only tag along because they pity you or because sometimes you bring them sweets. And your parents... they were never really abusive but it’s like they made sure to always keep a toxic atmosphere in the house.

As for your grades, they’ve just kept going downhill since September. You’ve kinda given up, since no one expects much from you anymore. Or so you thought.

After class, you’re supposed to meet up with your teacher so she can introduce you to your new tutor, a fellow student who will help you with your homework. This is your last chance to pick yourself up, as she said.

You enter the teachers lounge to see Tsukkishima Kei, a guy in your class, standing beside your teacher. She introduces the both of you, and you leave for the studying class. You walk there in silence. There’s many students studying in groups there, and you sit beside Tsukkishima at a table by the windows.

“let’s get started, yeah?”, he asks, as if he’s impatient to be done. Didn’t he volunteer for this though? Maybe the teacher picked him because he has good grades and he’s forced to be here...

Tsukkishima had quite the reputation amongst the first years. He wasn’t only known to be a tall, handsome volleyball player but also a smartass and an asshole. You feared he might be mean to you if he had been forced to do this. Your mental health was hanging by a thread and if he even did so much as raise his voice at you, you would break down.

“Did you volunteer for this?”, you ask shyly.

“Yeah, what about it.”, he replies in a cold, annoyed tone.

“It’s just- did- why-” you sigh. “doesn’t matter”

“maybe he was offered bonus points... not that he needs them though.”, you think to yourself. But it doesn’t matter, nothing does. Everything in life is temporary, except pain, so that’s the only thing you must focus on.

You take out a math textbook, and Tsukkishima starts explaining the first problem. 10 minutes later, you still don’t get it and your tutor is obviously very annoyed by your ignorance.

“God y/k can you just focus on this? It’s basic mathematical equations!”, he says while lightly rolling his eyes.

“Hey i’m sorry i’m not as smart as you, ok? I’m sorry i’m not good at anything, i’m sorry i can’t do anything right!”, you say as tears start forming in your eyes. As they begin rolling down your cheeks, you get up to leave.

You go to push your chair, but Tsukkishima grabs you by the wrist.

“Ow! let me go!”, you scream.

“Shh i’m not even pulling hard-” he replies, trying to calm you down before people start staring.

Tsukkishima is determined to keep you here, so he pulls at your wrist, you fight back and in all this commotion, your sleeve gets slightly rolled up, revealing a freshly scarred wrist.

Tsukkishima lets go quickly upon seeing the scars, looking away. You pull down your sleeve and leave.

“God what’s his problem”, you think. “it’s not like anyone’s asking him to do this! What does he care anyway”

Tonight is a night like the others. Homework, TV, slashing your wrists... you can’t even feel the pain anymore. All you know is you want this to end.

The next day, you catch Tsukkishima staring at you in class multiple times throughout the day. What a brat, what a jerk! “He probably just wanted to mock me”, you think.

You don’t tell your friends about any of this. None of their business. You’ve never been much of a talker, after all. At the end of the day, you don’t even wait for them to walk home. Not like they’d wait for you either, so what does it matter.

But someone is waiting for you at the gate. You try to walk fast in front of him, but the tall blond haired boy still notices you.

“Oi, y/k.”, he says calmly, putting an arm in front of you to block the way.

You have no choice but to stop. You let out a deep sigh before turning your head to him.

“Would you mind stopping by the park with me?”, asks Tsukkishima.

“sure”, you shrug.

It’s not like you had any plans tonight. It was going to be a regular evening of procrastination, trying to do homework but not getting anything done because of the unbearable amount of stress and spiralling anxiety and finally going to sleep at 1 am. Your parents don’t get home until after dinner, so they won’t know any of this. You wonder if they’d even notice. Sometimes it feels as if no one would care if you disappeared.

Tsukkishima goes to grabs your wrist to make you follow him, but you hear him mutter “right, sorry”, before backing away.

The whole time you walk at a slow pace, not even trying to keep up with the tall volleyball player. At some point it starts irritating him, so he gestures at you to walk faster. You sigh and do a bit of an effort to keep up, but you’re still not fast enough so Tsukkishima just grabs your hand to force you to go to a quicker pace.

You’re about to protests, but why? You might not be around for long anymore so might as well do some crazy shit while you’re still here, while you’re still... alive.

His hand feels so comforting in yours, but you have to remind that this doesn’t mean anything. But still, the feeling of being love had become a distant memory until now. It awakens a part of you you thought was gone forever, killed by sadness.

You were so lost in your thoughts that you don’t even notice you’ve arrived at the park, until Tsukkishima lets go of your hand. It’s a modest park with only two wooden benches, an old fountain full of coins and a few trees.

Tsukkishima turns to face you as you sit down besides him.

“So what did you want?”, you ask, eager to get out of there, even if you’d rather die than go home. But that’s probably just because you feel like you don’t belong anywhere, ever.

“I’m worried about you, y/k...” starts Tsukkishima. “I’ve watched the light in your eyes go out rapidly since the beginning of the year, your smile get more and more fake... Thays why I volunteered to help you out.”

“Out of pity, huh. Great.”, you sigh. You roll your eyes and look away, crossing your arms.

“That’s not it, y/k. You just seemed like such a good person, always caring about others even though your own life was going downhill... I couldn’t bear to see you like this. Because the truth is...”

He stops mid sentence, just looking at you. You eventually turn back to him, staring at his glistening hazel eyes. He doesn’t seem like the asshole everyone warned you about at all. A cute blond strand dances to the rythme of the wind in front of his eyes, and you just want to put it out of the way...

“i love you.”, finally finishes Tsukkishima.

This wasn’t what you were expecting. It actually explains a lot of things, but creates a bunch of new questions too. He looks a bit embarrassed, and his cheeks become a light shade of pink, just like his soft looking lips.

You gradually get closer to him, and before you know it, your faces are only inches apart. He cups your face with his hands, lightly brushing your cheeks. Tears form in your eyes, and without thinking another second, you kiss Tsukkishima.

He kisses you passionately, making you remember all the things that have kept you alive so far... All your ambitions, all your dreams, all your hopes.

You feel his hands run down your neck, then reach your shoulders and finally your arms. He glides his fingers under your sleeves, running them on your scars. It feels fresh and reassuring.

Your lips part after a minute and Tsukkishima whispers “you’re safe now.”

You hug him tightly, sobbing violently against his chest. He holds you close to him, and you finally calm down, reassured by the steady sound of his heartbeat.

“I won’t try to pretend to know what you’re going though but please, y/k, let me try my best, ok?”, he whispers in your ear. His warm breath tickles against your neck.

You back off a bit to look at him, slightly brushing your fingers against his pale face. You nod lightly. He softly kisses your forehead, takes your hand and says “let me walk you home.”

You walk at his pace this time, keeping your bodies as close as possible. When you reach your house, it’s like waking up from a dream that wasn’t over. You can’t let go just yet...

“How about I try to help you with maths again tomorrow?”, he says, seeing your eyes full of tears. You nod, and Tsukkishima lifts your chin with a finger to place one last kiss on your lips.

You look at him walking away from your porch until he’s completely out of sight. For the first time in months, you feel something other than stress, like a shining star in this pitch black void that was your heart. Excitement, happiness or maybe even... love?

-the end-

[ruby3818]

Franticshipping Playlist

A shortlist of my favourite franticshipping songs with one line from each song and why the song reminds me of them o/.  (pretty much every song is from Ruby’s pov because all the female vocalists I love don’t suit frantic sadly :( )

Lucky - Jason Mraz & Colbie Caillat

Duet between Ruby and Sapphire ‘’Lucky I’m in love with my best friend”

Already Home - Thousand Foot Krutch

Ruby in ORAS when he’s seperated from Sapphire realising that all he does is run away up until him promising her to never be seperated “And I’ve made a mess of myself on my own” “I won’t run away ‘cause I’m already home”

Clock Strikes - 1 OK Rock

Recurring time theme of RS and the promise to never be seperated in ORAS “The rift of time is always forever and I’ll always be here believe it ‘til the end”

Best Is Yet To Come - RED

That moment before they go to space and Ruby and Sapphire are talking about having their whole lives ahead of them to enjoy ;; “I still believe the best is yet to come”

Be Somebody - Thousand Foot Krutch

How Ruby and Sapphire changed for each other by trying to achieve their new goals but also be better because of each other being a reflection of their old selves present day “ You’re the only one who knows who I really am.” “We all wanna be somebody, we just need a taste of who we are”

Hairline Fracture - Rise Against

Pretty much desribes post Fortree to post Mirage Island in chronological order. also same idea as above ^ “ A child unloved but then grows up to love what they despised”

37mm - AFI

Ruby “tainting Sapphire’s crystal clear heart’ after the Salamence incident from their childhood. Also Space scene “Just give me your hand and I’ll let you feel the wounds”

I Climb - Thousand Foot Krutch

Suits ORAS perfectly. “She hears the conversation moving further from where she’s going, without even knowing”

Made of Glass - Trapt

A little more angsty but really suits them. “Am I made of glass ‘cause you see right through me”” I don’t know who I am and you’re the only one who see’s that”

Starlight - Muse

Ruby searching for his childhood friend plus space scene “Far away from the memories of the people who care if I live or die” This lyric in particular suits the scene where Wallace tells Ruby to think about his loved ones instead of giving up so he remembers his childhood friend ;-;

Kiss and Control - AFI

Ruby destined for stardom. Plus dying in space. “Watch the star’s turn you to nothing, now blush and smile as they whisk you away”

When Two Are One - Atreyu

Ruby and Sapphire destined to control the orbs and save Hoenn together. Also Ruby not coping with them being seperated in ORAS as well as saying as long as they work together they won’t die “I’ll stand by your side, hope will never die” 

The Part That Hurts The Most - Thousand Foot Krutch

Perfectly Summarises Ruby’s actions in ORAS with him pushing Sapphire Away right up until the confession scene. “All I want is to be near you but I push you away”

Without You - Breaking Benjamin

Ruby realising he needs Sapphire with him to stop the meteor. “I am with you, forever, the end” “I can’ face the dark without you”

Arise - Flyleaf

Sapphire having hope that they will save the world in Hoenn. “Hold on to the world we remember fighting for, there’s some strength left in us yet”

Acid Rain - Avenged Sevenfold

Space scene \(T-T)/ “There’s no death, no end of time, when I’m facing it with you”

Second Heartbeat - Avenged Sevenfold

Ruby’s memories of losing his childhood friend (and father). “To me you were my soul companion, now you are so far away, nothing can take away the times and the memories we had”

Somewhere Only We Know - Keane

Remembering their childhood friend plus the end of the world in ORAS (100% recommend this song, it will make you cry ;;) “This could be the end of everything so why don’t we go somewhere only we know”

Amazing - Alex Lloyd

Ruby’s memories of Sapphire during the RS arc. Also memories of his childhood friend  “The things that seem to bind us are the things we put behind us”

Shook - Thousand Foot Krutch

Ruby and Sapphire being reunited in ORAS. Also them stopping the meteor together “And I’ve never fallen in my life like I did when I fell into your arms again”

The Interview - AFI

Ruby in ORAS. “for a change I’ll refrain from hiding all of me from you”

At The Beginning - Donna Lewis & Richard Marx

RS arc!! \^^/ Also ORAS suits too “Now I know my dream will live on, I’ve been waiting so long, nothings gonna tear us apart”

Link to the playlist on Youtube is in the reblog if anyone wants to listen o/

[kinsbin]

Hunter, Hunter, Demon

Title: Hunter, Hunter, Demon Ship: Taro/Alexys/Cyril [Self Insert/OCs] Word Count: 2010

Summary: Alexys is demon who has, accidentally or not so accidentaly, fallen in love with a couple of demon hunters. Little does she know that the feeling is mutual. 

A/N: Another comm for @space-sweetheart​ !! This one is more lighthearted than the oTHER I PROMISE BUT THEY’RE ALL VERY CUTE

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“This wasn’t supposed to happen.”

Alexys paused in her movements about the kitchen of the small hotel room she, Cyril, and Taro had all decided to stop in for the night. Their hunt about the city for a lead on a demonic underground dedicated to selling black market liquid joy to unsuspecting human beings had ended in a cold trail after their lead escaped around a back alley with far too many allure sigils and illusionistic bindings for her to even count let alone warn the two hunters of. Instead she had pulled at the two at her side and forced them to stop, warning with a hiss that they wouldn’t make it. Cyril had gotten angry, of course, claiming that they would. That, with her help, they could do it just fine. When she insisted that she couldn’t unravel all of the sigils at once, Taro was the one to come to her defense, albeit stubbornly, and suggest that they hole up somewhere for the night before other demons caught the scent of their dearest partner in crime.

It led them to the shitty Motel 6 that they were all 3 currently in, the two bedroom area giving away to a small and private foyer right before the bathroom, complete with a barely there doorframe they could slide in place for some semblance of privacy. Of course, what privacy was there between two hunters and a demon? Apparently, Alexys thought with only the slightest hint of bitterness deep in the recesses of her throat, still some. Still enough as the two hunters excused themselves for a private meeting in that hidden foyer, still unaware of how loud they talked as she leaned in slightly to catch the next words that flowed from their lips.

“Things happen, Priest,” Taro’s voice was an easygoing and amused tone, laced with that tangible hint of an accent lingering on the bases of his ‘rs’ and ‘t’s. She found it charming, the way he spoke with those lithe hints. He changed his sentences at times to Japanese, a flawless transformation that could only come with the bilingual abilities of someone raised in a house with two or more languages. The only information she had gotten out of it, though, was that his mother already spoke both just fine and used them in the house. Neither liked to discuss their past with her much. She couldn’t say she blamed them.

Taro continued, though, his laughter that echoed relaxed as she heard the shrug in it, “That shouldn’t be something you’re too surprised about. We lose trails, it happens. We know that the ring is operating within this part of the city and, regardless if we take our time to sleep tonight, they can’t pack up and move all of it out of a certain radius. Demons or no, they possess human forms and human forms are heavy and have lingering effects so-.”

“I’m not talking about the job.”

Cyril’s voice was curt. A sharp sounding thing. It ripped through the conversation like a blade tearing through a flimsy sheet of paper, the noise vaguely unpleasant but necessary to hear as Alexys jumped. She half expected both to come barging out of the area, still mid-conversation, growling and huffing under their breaths at one another as they always seemed to do. Cyril never verbally admitted to liking either Alexys or Taro, but Taro could convince a room full of vampires and demons to find his company enjoyable if he wished to. It was the skill that helped him to survive in the world as long as he did, his phrasing careful and nearly as sharp as his teeth.

Even his words didn’t seem to quell the intensity of Cyril’s tone, however, as she listened in more.

“Oh? Then what, praytell, are you referring to?”

Taro’s tone was easy going still, a lax sort of curiosity lacing against his mouth as she heard him lean against something. Likely the counter of the bathroom, his feet crossing over the ankles as he leaned back and sighed, stretching his neck. He had cracked a bone or two during the run, but it was nothing he couldn’t pop back into place with both of their help. She always worried about the way Taro’s bones popped. He was a bag of rice krispy treats. At her side, the two dogs he kept with him whimpered softly at their owner through the door. She shushed them gently, running her hands over the scalp of one of the rottweilers until it rested its head back down on her lap, licking its lips and staring with her back at the closed door.

“You know what I’m referring to, Taro.”

“Pretend I don’t and refresh my mind. I’d like to hear you say it out loud for once instead of blaming me or God or whoever else you think is up to no good.”

There was a low groan of annoyance, followed by Taro’s delighted laughter.

“Alexys,” Cyril finally admitted in a tone so low that she had to strain to her him, “She wasn’t supposed to happen. She wasn’t supposed to be with us! I… We…”

She felt her heart clench at the implication. Did they find her annoying? Was she just an issue to have around rather than a friend as she had considered herself to be to them? Perhaps it was stupid of her, she realized as her hand raised up to bite at her nails nervously, for thinking that something like her could ever befriend demon hunters like them. What was she possibly doing, being with them? Acting as though she could help them in the case that they were far more qualified to do… The doubts rung themselves sharp in her mind as she tried to push them away, her hair shifting slightly with energy as her emotions slowly grew to hold onto her.

When Cyril’s voice appeared again, a whisper of light against a dark background in the back of her mind, her gaze shot open and her jaw went slack.

“We weren’t supposed to fall in love with her.”

His tone was sad. A soft worry coated his voice in a way she had never heard it before. Taro must have never heard it either. She could hear him shift uncomfortably in his spot and not answer, speechless for the first time since she had ever known him.

“We weren’t supposed to… “ Taro admitted back with a slowness in his voice, as though he was trying not to smile, “But we did, didn’t we? There’s nothing we can do to take that back, Cyril. She… means a lot to you and to me. I’ve seen it in your eyes long before you admitted it.”

“When all of this is over,” Cyril murmured weakly, “She’ll go back to Hell. She’ll return to that life that demons have and forget about us. What’s two humans to a creature who can live for eternity, after all?”

His only response was a sad chuckle from the other hunter as they shifted again in their positions, making Alexys wince.

Unable to take it anymore, she flung herself up from her spot on the bed before she could think about it. The dog resting its head on her lap whined at the lack of contact, but watched curiously as the demoness stomped over to the doorway with purpose and flung the flimsy screen open, all but cracking it in the impact her claws had on the delicate surface.

Cyril and Taro turned to face her, eyes wide and faces clearly startled as they took her in. She looked sweet, less than intimidating in her large t-shirt and shorts, but the horns and the fire in her eyes made up for the otherwise casual wear. They cringed back as they realized the situation at hand. She had heard them talking, their voices less than quiet in the passion of their discussion, and the two shared a single gaze of worry amognst one another. Cyril’s squint against his scarred skin was the only semi-glare he offered to the other man before focusing back forward, lips parting to make is case as best as he could to the demon before him.

He got no words out, however, as she ran up to him. Bracing for impact, he expected to die. He was ready to, in a way. The offense he had created must have been horrible to hear for her, certainly.

So when she hugged him, embracing him close to her body, Cyril was certainly confused.

“You’re idiots,” Alexys laughed weakly through the apparent shakiness of breath she experienced, “Both of you… Thinking that I’d leave you… Thinking that I don’t love you back! Of course I do, Hell, of course I do. I’ve never loved anyone more than I love you stupid, ridiculous little humans.”

Behind her, Taro laughed through his shaky smile, a relieved and relaxed sound that echoed its comfort through the acoustics of the bathroom. Cyril stared, wide blue eyes watching the demon hug him, before his own hands rose up. Unsure at first, they hesitated above her body for a long moment before, ever so slowly, they lowered down onto her. When the embrace was returned, Alexys felt tears well in her eyes. The thick black liquid that served as her body’s source of water was discomforting to say the least, but, she couldn’t care. Not when she was being held like this. Not when it was Cyril who was doing it, as he buried his face in her hair and inhaled, tightening his grip as though she would slip from his fingers at any moment. This was, she was pretty sure, the first time they had hugged at all in their relationship. She smiled into his chest as she kept him in place, turning her head slightly to watch Taro in the corner.

Her eyes were an invitation and he smiled at it, approaching the two before opening his arms wide as well. Cyril glared down at him for a moment.

“Don’t you dare.”

“She invited me!”

“No. Wait your turn.”

“Nahhhhh. Group hug time, Priest~.”

And Taro joined in, his long arms enveloping both the demon and the other hunter as they hugged. A kiss was placed on the back of her head, a careful and sweet thing that made her shiver as Taro nuzzled into her from behind, sandwiching her between the two of them. Normally being between two demon hunters like this would be less than pleasant certainly but… with them? Alexys wished the moment would never end for her.

She looked up, gazing into Cyril’s face, and he watched her. He gazed at her so carefully, so delicately, that for a moment she thought she was an angel. This man, with his ability to give demons release from their confines, had found his way into her heart and she felt it fluttering at the sight of him. Taro’s breath was on her neck as he leaned forward as well, laughing behind her with that mischievous smile on his lips.

“You should kiss him now.”

And she did.

Their lips pressed, gentle and soft and carefully together, in fear that she might hurt him in one way or another with her enthusiasm. Instead, after a moment of tense pause, he returned the kiss. Their lips worked together in the most beautiful of ways, her body becoming hotter than it already was as she pressed herself closer to Cyril’s form. This gave Taro the opportunity to lean forward and kiss her shoulder, sighing into her body as the group held one another in the middle of the cheap motel room bathroom in the middle of the night.

This was it, she realized with a jubilation deep in the center of her stomach. This was the thing she had longed for. The situation she wanted. Between these two men, once her enemies and now something more, she had located the thing she wanted most in her life.

This was home.

[highkingfen]

Someone asked my why I loved Fen. Tumblr ate the answer, so here what I said.

Alright that is a really good question

It started during the Haitus between season 2 and 3. I liked Fen and was intriged by what her life would be as someone who was raised to be married of (if ever the guy shows up). So I started to dig around and saw that she was really hated by the fandom

At this point, we knew nothing of her but her arc in s02 which is from wanting to be obedient to Eliot to being pregnant and fucked over by Margo; basically being a pawn and mistreated. A lot of fan hated (and still hate) her because she is married to Eliot and Queliot couldn’t happen anymore. And I started to defend her saying that she was forced into her marriage as well and she was just trying to make the best of it while having a husband who is not attracted to her and probably grew up being told: you will get married, you will get pregnant, you will provide an heir, that is your role on the fillorian throne.

 I became very protective of her, trying to make people understand that it is not her fault that Queliot is not happening.

Honestly, it bumped me and almost drove me away from the fandom. Some friend suggested to me to write a fanfic of how I saw her growing up before Eliot would be, so maybe others could understand my point of view. It was near November and Nanowrimo was on the corner so I took all of a month to write The Girl from the World in the Wall which is a 50k + fic about Fen pre-Eliot. From her mother’s death when she was two to her wedding day.

As I wrote I just fucking fell in love with her. Even if my story is not canon, to put myself in the shoes of a girl that knew she will never be able to marry who she wanted and decided to join the FU Fighters in the hope to help Fillory if she was not on the throne. She have a lot of love for her land but also for her familly. She sacrificed everything to go in a loveless marriage. It took having her baby girl ripped away from her for Fen to decided that she was done playing by the rule everyone put in front of her

Season 3 happen and more people love her. Which I adore the writer for. Fen is more complex than a peasant girl who makes Eliot unhappy. She is her own person. And she discovers that by herself, with the help of Eliot, Julia and Margo. Having her saying to Eliot that she couldn’t stay in Fillory and needed time for herself was so BIG for her. She never put herself in front of others need. She never said or ask anything that could bring light on her. I doubt she even wonders who she was out of the role of the wife of a High King. This is why, when Eliot says she could leave, Fen reminds him she is married to him, not his title. We are stuck together with each other is her reminding Eliot that she is more than a pawn in his life and, if they don’t love each other, they could still respect each other; she is by his side while he is in the election despite him just having said she could leave. It’s not only to protect herself from what people could do to her; when Fen has her heart set on something, she does it. She promised to be my Eliot’s side for better or worse and that is what she is doing

This is why I SCREAMED when I saw that Margo gave her the role of acting king. Not only this is Margo saying ‘’Hey I know I screwed up but I trust you now and I trust you care enough about Fillory to look after it and not have a power trip. This is Margo saying to Fen that a Fillorian can be on the throne, just like the FU Fighters wanted. But also, I am sure this will give Fen the kick in the butt she needs to affirm herself; not to hesitate about what she wants or feel bad for asking things. Having to speak as a High King is different than being in the Council and I am more than excited to see where the writer will bring her this season. From what I saw, Margo and Her share the crown. Not only its big for Margo but for Fen too!

And before I finish this novella, I want to point out that what sold me about Fen being a kind and compassionate person and not only acting like it because she had to, it’s her arc with the fairies. She is kidnapped by them, made unable to hold her daughter after she gave birth and yet, came back without her to warn Eliot about the Fairies plan to invade. She hates de fairies, with an excellent reason. And yet, her heartache so much that she is ready to believe the Fairy Queen’s lie about Fray. When we learn the truth about the whole thing, not only she is destroyed as a mother, but the small spark of hope and of the Fen she uses to be before the kidnapping is gone; there is a before and an after when you lose a child. Fen stew in her hate on earth and is not jumping on the call when Julia ask for help; for the first time in her life probably, she decides to put herself, her pain, her emotions, in front of others. Which she probably never did. When she said to Skye ‘’Shit you are a slave’’ its her being mad at the fact that part of her feels bad for the fairy and know herself well enough that if she continues, she will start to care. This is why she pushes away any attempt Julia makes to make her join the investigation, reminding her (and herself) that because of them her daughter is dead

But then, she had to confront the Fairy Queen. And something sparks inside Fen; she realizes that she is not mad at the fairies as a species. She is mad at the Fairy Queen and what she did to her. She calls her out and tells her that she is willing to help them despite what the Queen did to her; meaning that once again Fen put her feeling aside from the greater good. But this time, it is by choice and not because she is told to. Her ‘’I Hate Fairies’’ is the most venomous thing Fen probably ever said. Fen doesn’t hate usually. Not that deep, not that much. And yet, despite her hate, she cared. And that ended up freeing fairies that were mistreated and use as slave despite what they were telling her (When she choke up after seeing they took Skye’s leg, mymy I cried)

So back when she is Acting King and the Fairy Queen comes to her, not only she dresses herself as a fairy to find who steal them, but confront them: affirming that Fairies were full citizen of Fillory and under her protection is so fucking big from a girl that tried not to care that a handful were slave on Earth. And goddamit, she even cries when the Fairy Queen sacrifice herself for her people. Because, at that moment, Fen understand that whatever the Queen did, it was always for her people; she stole children because the Fairies were unable to have babies, she stole limbs because that’s what magicians have been doing to them for centuries, she took over Fillory because that land was better for her people and now, she was ready to die to make sure they will be safe (hell, I am even ready to say that the Queen is actually sad that Fen’s daughter died in all of this, just by her unease to announce the news). ‘’Tears, for your enemies’’ This is the most powerful thing the Fairy Queen says and describe so much Fen. Because, in the end, and despite everything, Fairies are not enemies anymore and Fen even finds compassion for the Fairy Queen.

Compassion, Forgiveness and Love are hard to have in times of war, in times of doubt, in time of despair. We see with the others how easy it is to follow your demon and go the wrong way. And yet, Fen fights it and find a way to be kind and understanding. And even if she doesn’t have proper magic, I think this is Fen’s actual magical power; the power of love.  And it the world we are living right now, I want to be more like her

(I am not even sorry for that novella, I fucking love Fen ok)

[harinezumiko]

SU Movie Meta n Notions

Courtesy of @thoughttrainderailed​ putting up with my half-not-awake ramblings and chiming in to pour more gas on this shit. 

This could be complaint-flavored but it’s also fic notes flavored, except it’s like three goddamn fix-it-fics worth of notes for more Nanowrimos than I’ll ever complete. :’D 

Harinezumiko:

unrelated

but

I wonder if Lion adopting Cotton Candy Garnet is related to the fact that Garnet became a cat person and Cat Steven adopted Lion

Jaakusan:

I dig it

Harinezumiko:

since NOBODY ELSE WAS TAKING CARE OF THIS EXTREMELY LOST BUBBLE at that point

I am willing to accept Lion recognizing her as regressing to a kitten

you know what would've been a fun angle that we won't get

and perhaps goes against the supposed Intention of Spinel being toxic

but I would still find it more interesting than the nothing we get

Jaakusan:

?

Harinezumiko:

1) I would like Lion being a goddamn cat and therefore Capable of Therapy When Compelled to be a Thing

2) I want Spinel to have made An Attempt at fixing her hair for the Diamonds, only for Lion to immediately ruin her odangos

3) I would also like the fact that HEY SPINEL LOOK LION IS ALSO SOMETHING PINK JUST FUCKIN' DITCHED :| :| to be a Thing

4) also I still want Pearls Brigade On Earth, but I like the imagery of Lion knocking Spinel's attempt to Make Heart Odango because quit your shit

Jaakusan:

hahaha

Harinezumiko:

5) since we don't get a Hey Solidarity With Pearl Because Pearl Doesn't Count Rite Homeworld Elites Fuck U Spinel, I want her to accidentally end up with literally anything from Earth that she has attachment to and incentive to Suck Less for?

like I know she's a movie character and likely I won't have to deal with her again

but

I am still angery that they made as little attempt as possible at hiding that writing Spinel and the Diamonds off was just convenient and lazy, Spinel doesn't care that she fucked up the Earth with apparently her own stupid toxin and doesn't care about anyone there and that pisses me off.

I don't even care if she made a vague excuse about coming back to visit just Lion

I think that would've been a better end note than getting whisked off by the Fairy Tyrant Godmoms to live in the Castle in the Sky forever and never have to deal with things again

also I think it would be nice if Spinel, y'know, had any interest in any of the characters she hung out with except Steven during her reset day

because only Pink caused your problems you dumb shit

you still owe Garnet an apology and frankly everyone else too, but GIVE A SHIT. ANY OF A SHIT. EVEN A SMALL TURD OF A SHIT. ABOUT SOMEONE OTHER THAN PINK

Jaakusan:

yeeeaaaah

I would have liked

like okay keep her going off with the diamonds, my feelings about how that can so easily go Wrong aside

but when they pop up have Pink Pearl with them

and PP talks her down

because you know who is exactly as new to grieving Pink as Spinel?

Pink Pearl

Harinezumiko:

yes100% this

Jaakusan:

who thought everything was hunky-dory and is now cast adrift with nobody to cling to?

Pink Pearl

Harinezumiko:

also I am really pissed that like

yeah we got some fun Reset Pearl Nonsense

Jaakusan:

who fucking enjoyed the silly side of Pink that she probably copied from Spinel?Pink Pearl

Harinezumiko:

but we are still facing Pearls Have No Agency And Nobody Finds That Bad Except People Who Know Our Pearl Personally

we still don't see YP or BP for more than a cameo where they don't interact directly with anyone

and they're just being another Utena reference anyway

like they seem to be happier and more comfortable but they don't interact directly with anyone and they literally only get like one off the cuff remark about Steven who doesn't count and isn't part of Gem Society

dude seriously Pink Pearl has so much room to be interesting adjacent from Spinel

but the lack of anything from Spinel even acknowledging that any Gems that aren't Diamonds exist beyond being props doesn't yet bode well for me?

because Spinel is an invitation for the Diamonds to resume something familiar and comfortable, but it's with a literally toxic person who wants to change and is being put in a world where change is not a thing

Spinel has never been part of Homeworld society either, she's been Pink's garden playmate

Jaakusan:

YEAH

(brb closing up to move computer)

Harinezumiko:

(ngl though I would totally take Pink Pearl showing up and fuckin' Asuka Slapping Spinel)

kk <3

Jaakusan:

and back

I just

sigh

it's weird to phrase it like this but

I just want characters that aren't Steven or the immediate antagonist to get significant interactions

the memory sequences still don't count

Harinezumiko:

I agree 100%

Jaakusan:

that's just bringing them back up to par

Harinezumiko:

I also think like

while I would've had even less fun with the movie it. literally squandered so much room for Steven to work with the Barn Gays

Jaakusan:

YES

Harinezumiko:

like... why. what was the point. stop increasing the cast and bringing people back if I don't get to see them do anything

Jaakusan:

YES

Harinezumiko:

I get that RS trapped herself with the stupid Steven Limited POV thing

I still think it's stupid

I think the movie could've cut away from that

I think we could've done away with that in Change Your Mind

I think we could've bullshit excuse handwaved it with some garbage about how Steven re-integrated with Pink Steeb and it allowed him to grow and broadened his worldview because the limited POV was something something Pink Steeb 'shielding' Steven and thus the viewers from Other Stuff

we have a two year time skip because RS was struggling to write things in Steeb's POV and for fucking what, to STILL have a limited protag POV?!

and I know the show is Steven's story

but if it's been something the crew has struggled with

since

I think they said somewhere around like season four was when they started being like "fff" about it

THEN FIX IT

Jaakusan:

eeeesh

Harinezumiko:

FIX IT IN THE MOVIE

FIX IT IN THE TIME SKIP

NOBODY FUCKING CARES IT WON'T HARM THE VIEWERS TO GET AN EXPANDED EXPERIENCE?

like I know that was a Thing RS Wanted To Maintain

and I suspect the rapid writing deterioration of MLP in later seasons didn't help

but fuck everything to do with this like... oh whoops nobody else can do anything protag is the only one who's not an NPC thing

Jaakusan:

YEAH

SO MANY PEOPLE COULD HAVE DONE THINGS

T H E Y H A V E A N A R M Y

Harinezumiko:

THEY HAVE AN ARMY

THEY HAVE NANEFUA

MISS ME WITH NOBODY IN BEACH CITY CAN DO ANYTHING, THE ONLY ONE THERE WHO SUCKS IS RONALDO

Jaakusan:

YOU CANNOT TELL ME IN TWO YEARS NANEFUA DIDN'T INPUT ANTI-GEM MEASURES IN CASE THIS BULLSHIT STARTED UP AGAIN

Harinezumiko:

dude you can't tell me other Gems didn't help

Jaakusan:

other paranoid just-got-out-of-a-war gems

just got out of a war gems living with gems they were fighting against

Harinezumiko:

you can't tell me that CGs that did believe in Pink's cause outside of Avoid Homeworld Live On Earth Forever would just

be totally cool

with this threat on their Earth, a threat that exclusively targets the organic life there

they're not even proactive in protecting the fucking humans?

are you shitting me?

someone please go fetch the Famethyst they APPARENTLY need to teach the rebels how to not just LET GOLDFISH DIE

Jaakusan:

SERIOUSLY

WHERE THE FUCK DID ALL THE GEMS GO DURING THE CATASTROPHE

WHICH STILL SHOULD HAVE EFFECTED MORE THAN. JUST BEACH CITY.

Harinezumiko:

they went to the concert and were totally unperturbed that Amethyst turned into Rose, duh

Jaakusan:

Famethyst would have been another acceptable Deal With Spinel cameo

Harinezumiko:

all of me as a person would like that

Jaakusan:

they have experience with being abandoned disappointments AND with wrangling people who are Upset and don't want to cooperate for their own good

Harinezumiko:

I also think that, y'know, STILL NOT DEALING WITH THE ROSE QUARTZES which I still think are rhinestones is bullshit

Amethyst could've at least lampshaded it

STEVEN could've

fuck, dude, Blue is like OMG A PINK TREASURE??? like yes like the zoomans how the fuck's Holly's stress level btw

Jaakusan:

seriously

WHERE ARE THE ROSE QUARTZES, CREW

WHAT DID THE DIAMONDS DO WITH THEM NOW

Harinezumiko:

where's Jasper

lmao

also host and I were talking about like

Jaakusan:

y u p

Harinezumiko:

Jasper having more room for redemption than Holly

because duh

but also because Holly has been trapped with a bunch of Remarkably Well-Adjusted War Veterans Who Are Extremely Friendly for thousands of years and the stick is still firmly up her ass

and Jasper is... apparently Gifted Child Who Can't Escape Her One (1) Big Failure And Is Branded By Being The Best Of Trash?

which is why she's a bully?

but you can't tell me Bismuth wouldn't brawl it out with her

or that they wouldn't be able to bond over Pink/Rose not trusting of them

or that it's fucking hard being on Earth where you did all this fighting, and you liked fighting, but the reason is Gone and your anger's still thereYou can't tell me that Bismuth doesn't ever have to deal with Gems now who think she's still in her little box and won't see past it, or that it pisses her entirely off but she can't kick ass and take names because Peace Time

bullshit they don't both have war PTSD

bullshit Jasper wouldn't have to grudgingly respect that Bismuth is demonstrably more useful and capable than her intended purpose

and like let's be real

it would be much easier for Jasper to swallow that pill than that Pearl isn't just brokenPearl keeps getting painted as abnormal by everyone's standards for not being a purse

as much as I want Pearl to kick Jasper's ass and have Jasper have to reassess things, canon isn't really setting Jasper up to have that epiphany, not even counting the show's unwillingness to just LET PEARL NOT SUCK AT FIGHTING

but also Bismuth is why Lapis happened

Bismuth was in Beta to kick quartz ass and attacked Lapis who was there to check the results of the hasty terraforming job done on that Kindergarten

Jaakusan:

yeah

Harinezumiko: 

there's so much room to close that story arc

and for Jasper to have to get her head out of the sand and reassess things because the world doesn't make sense anymore but who cares because she and Bismuth can punch the fuck out of each other for hours and Bismuth doesn't think less of her for it

Jasper doesn't have a peer she can 1:1 with because apparently even Garnet wasn't strength-equal to her, but Jasper's going to need several kicks in the head before she can accept that Garnet isn't 2:1

but Bismuth isn't a superior officer, her quarry of origin doesn't matter socially the way Jasper's does, and bullshit they won't get along like a house on fire if Bismuth can make friends with Lapis

Jaakusan:

seeeeeeriously

Harinezumiko:

and Bismuth would 100% be like

Jasper I have a suggestion

MAKE THINGS

shut up I know you hate art because it's frivolous but DO SOMETHING PRODUCTIVE WITH YOUR ENERGY

you'll FEEL BETTER and maybe you'll even find out you like doing a thing and if it's not something you were designed for then who fuckin' cares if you're not instantly the Best At It bitch that's good for you, learn to make stuff.

Jaakusan:

yessssss

Harinezumiko:

hell, like

they even could've lampshaded Jasper being MIA in the movie

Yellow for Some Fucking Reason cancelled her war plans Everywhere even though their whole empire relies on it

Jasper's off Doing That

they could've had several CGs offworld to handwave that too, like

they're not here and yeah we could call their ship with Lars' fuckin ship (where’s Emerald at?) but even if they could get back in time they couldn't evacuate Beach City because the warp drives would need time to recover that we don't have

Earth's not exactly a place teeming with non-organic energy to just power Gem ships

also in that vein likeI think it would've been good to have like

something

about Yellow not having to just dismantle everything she's ever done on her own?

like

does Blue

not have diplomats

was her one (1) skill really just Pushing With Crying

Jaakusan:

shrug 

I can't imagine she needed diplomats with how they treat alien life

I could maybe see her trying to create a diplomatic corp now

but they had no reason for one prior to reformatting the empireI do wonder if they just

stopped kindergarten production and pulled out

or if they tried to rebuild the planets they ravaged

Harinezumiko:

right?

well and like

it sounded like Sapphire was somewhat that kind of Aristocracy

so like

why not

have sapphires who are fairly Revered and also can at least theoretically guess if diplomacy rolls will fail

go help... with peace efforts...

Jaakusan:

at a guess

because they haven't actually reformed yet

they're still at the stage of "we're doing this because we love Pink/Steven and we want Steven to stick around" and not "we've internalized the teachings and Believe we were Wrong"so they're doing like

the bare minimum to meet expectations

because they don't actually care about the results outside of "Steven said we're doing good"

Harinezumiko:

oh no I agree

I think that's more believable

but I think that's not convenient for the writers who keep trying to cut corners

so most likely they'll offscreen epiphany if they don't backslide instantly and in a way Steven can yell at them for in his lifetime

and then Steven will at some point be Happily Surprised by undue progress

Jaakusan:

probably sigh

Harinezumiko:

I'm willing to believe like

Jaakusan:

the Diamonds are getting the Barn treatment

Harinezumiko:

Blue might actually Get It

not because she really Gets It

but because the Oh My God Pink Is Gone Because Of Us, I think, left an impact

and she otherwise did somehow come to the conclusion that Not All Organics Are The Worst likely because they remind her of Pink

but while she thought Pink was literally for real dead, she did get to find out that something as fragile and short-lived as an Um Greg Universe can potentially understand her feelings despite being literally immune to her miasma sadness

and now that she's making a conscious effort not to do that, and following having Yellow's breakdown during their fight in Change Your Mind, I think she'll be more proactive

and possibly more willing to take interest in other species and cultures and their Ways, even if I'm sure at first it'll still be motivated by Because Pink

and as long as she can be empathetic and help Yellow on that front, Yellow can potentially afford breaking down sometimes in private, because they've now also both seen what Constant Facade turned White into

and they both want White back

none of them can have Pink back but they can keep each other together, so Fairy Godmoms can get their shit together, and maybe Blue has a shit ton of notes somewhere about sustaining the Zoomans that can be implemented toward other planets and species and families they broke up

Jaakusan:

nodnod

Harinezumiko:

but realistically, if they were living on human time, it would take the rest of their natural lives to get their family shit together

and they don't get to do that because they're royalty

Jaakusan:

(I want Greg and Blue to be friends and Yellow to be like are you fucking serious Pink chose this and just eternally stink eye him)

Harinezumiko:

they're the entire ruling class of an immortal race of Gems who've spent millennia not only Doing War Things By Design but also who've been made only to Do War Things

like, how do you even dismantle that without wiping a clean slate

we saw how useless it was trying to give a day old Pearl choices

how the fuck are these emotionally constipated Broken God Queens supposed to unlearn their own shit and lead by example

they can't un-design Gems predate Pink

(I mean the solution is to step down and put other Gems in charge but that's still not an instant solution and we still won't fucking get to see it in the show)

(But the point remains that short of some deus ex machina hivemind available to make all the other pearls not overwhelm if you ask to be called Pink Lasagna you don't even have direct underlings that can sit in for you, like, fuck guys, you lost one of your set and made no contingency plan for if it happened again)

(you fucking honest to God thought Something could shatter you and you didn't properly wipe out the entire planet and star system it came from? you're asking for a second round.)

Jaakusan:

jesus, right???

like

real talk

as soon as the movie introduced the concept of concentrated organic murder juice

my first thought was

okay why the FUCK didn't they bomb Earth with that when they lost the war????

have fun on your useless fucking dead rock you'll never have the resources and tech to get off of, rebels

those that survive the earth collapsing because apparently it also breaks up the actual planet rather than just poisoning Everything

Harinezumiko:

right??

well and like

clearly

they just MAKE PLANET KILLER AND STORE IT SOMEWHERE

which I mean I guess if it weren't pink and clearly custom and if it hadn't been a literal fucking hour tops Spinel could've nicked it if the Diamonds really had just pulled the plug on things and abandoned projects

which is still bullshit

but it's still bullshit they should've addressed

Jaakusan:

yeeeeeaaaaah

Harinezumiko:

likeI know it's something Pink likely wouldn't know shit about

but Steven after working with the Diamonds to dismantle the shit?

yeah

uh

he needs to know that shit

Spinel also can't be the only Gem that takes this bullshit badly

Jaakusan:

no reckless dumping of toxic chemicals

Harinezumiko:

not everything needs to be a response to Pink

Jaakusan:

YEAH

Harinezumiko:

that was one of the few things I did like about Steg

not him specifically

but that the first attempt failed because it hinged on Rose Is The Answer

Jaakusan:

but Pearl's whole memory sequence?

yeah

Harinezumiko:

but I maintain the entire movie fails hard at what this show is allegedly about

because no one except Garnet exists because of interaction with friends or family

no one is a product of love

Steven spends the entire movie trying to recreate the traumas that he thinks are the Defining Thing despite that literally not being what worked on Amethyst and despite getting Rupphire to fuse not fixing Garnet for ?? reasons 

I am still mad that we finally get Garnet being Wrong and it's swept under the rug, like? Garnet apparently DOESN'T exist on her own. there is, allegedly, no Garnet if Ruby and Sapphire don't remember it? Are you fucking me?

like A Garnet exists but it's not This Garnet even though as long as Ruby and Sapphire's love exists she should also exist because she's the embodiment of a concept

at the very minimum they should have given Garnet an in-movie explanation for not Remembering Herself

and that explanation doesn't get to be that she finds out that truth is a fucking concept

Jaakusan:

SERIOUSLY THAT WAS SO DUMB

Harinezumiko:

if Garnet's going to spend the entire movie asking stupid shit and getting nowhere then her epiphany should come from finding an answer, and we've already established Garnet's answer IS LOVE

we literally could've had it triggered by something else too like

address the future vision thing

fucking have Steven ask it outright

have Garnet admit she doesn't know

have Bismuth point out the visor thing

hell, you can still have Steven leave Toddler Garnet with Anthy Pearl if you want to

Have Garnet looking for something, have it be her visor, have it be clarity, have Garnet's uncertainty addressed by anyone literally at all

have fucking Amethyst after she gets her shit together remark that Garnet looks weird without her visor

have Pearl who at least KIND OF ends up on Babysitting Cotton Candy Duty for all of 5 seconds afterwards suggest her visor helps her focus

Jaakusan:

maybe based off a Sapphire having only one eye

Harinezumiko:

have Spinel's pot shot not be that Garnet is cute and stupid and trusting, but that she's a three-eyed freak who's still blind to what's happening right beneath them because the Earth's definitely going to fucking explode now and have Garnet make her glasses

have Garnet find her fucking goddamn truth if you're not going to let her answer be love, have Garnet make a decision in the same way that Pearl is allowed to make a choice, and tie it into Amethyst making a friend in Steven

Jaakusan:

YEAH

Harinezumiko:

there's a post about how Steven's failure is defining himself and the Gems by their trauma, as if trauma isn't part of what shapes you

but the post doesn't fucking even TOUCH on the fact that the movie doesn't supplement this traumatic shit with any of the supposed Family Bonding Crystal Gems Values that the show is allegedly made of

you know

the ball

they dropped

in Change Your Mind

:|

:| :|

okay in all of S5

Jaakusan:

Y E A H

Harinezumiko:

no one in this fucking movie does any soul searching at all and it Pisses Me Off

we get some from goddamn Spinel and while the number was enjoyable it has no impact on anything

she learns nothing

she still tries to kill everyone the second she stops getting her way

and she gets a Happily Ever After

and Idgaf that it's more true to Real Life why am I watching a cartoon if you're going to tell me Steven will never get to rest but Spinel gets to live in a castle with no consequences

why does Spinel get a fairytale ending if she's toxic, Sugar

Jaakusan:

YEEEEEAAAAAAAAH

the memory wiping literally had no point other than filling time

time that could have been filled with better, more meaningful things

Harinezumiko:

I even liked the memory wiping! Except nobody learned anything after

I would love a well-done amnesia season

I would love Slice of Life season: Everyone Learns What Life Is For

Jaakusan:

ooooh

Harinezumiko:

like, since we don't fucking HAVE SEASON SIX YET, there's no. reason to pin the movie as "vaguely adjacent to the timeline but don't worry about it"

I know it's because Movie and whatever

but you could just use the movie to launch the next season, mang

you could have Spinel apologize to Steven because she can't fix what the scythe did because the scythe isn't even fucking hers

it's a known weapon and it should've been the goddamn shoe-drop for Peridot being afraid of being harvested

have the movie lay the foundation for Steven trying to rebuild his home and his friends and his family without the Diamonds' intervention

the way the Crystal Gems deserve

give Earth a fresh slate since we don't know the goddamn background Gems

give the OG Mom Squad the chance to be welcomed by friends they don't know anymore, dismantle the Homeworld Defaults that they've been left with, let the secondary characters shine for two hours, and open Season Six with things being Different and Steven having to learn that It Be Like That Sometimes 

in the same way the corrupted Gems have to

let Mom Squad become nurturing by choice this time

let Steven be the person in the forefront of their memories, not millennia of Rose

and drop Jasper on the beach in a space pod only to find that Garnet can't fight, Rose's base is taken, her army is lost, the Pearl's not even defective anymore, and Amethyst is. kinda honestly the most functional person here and why the fuck is that the case

Give Season Six the chance to be the Barn Squad + Jasper helping Steven pick up the pieces of his life while Jasper occasionally chimes in still stuck in her ways, have Jasper get uncomfortably attached to this half-feral runt Amethyst that won't let go of her shins

have Jasper be aware that the CGs are Broken and Wrong and have that be what prompts her to fix it. Give her the excuse of wanting to kick Garnet's ass. Have her land on the beach in her Saiyan Pod totally visibly uncorrupted

have the season include the other remaining CGs trying to find themselves too

(and obviously reveal mid-season that Jasper's putting on airs and hiding her horns and spots in her costume change+hair, have her unwilling to admit it might be permanent for everyone, have her invested at that point enough that she doesn't find it acceptable)

(and then have her get the fuckin Piccolo treatment. have her get better as she becomes a better person.)

Amethyst can still be the first to really Get It, even

Amethyst accidentally shows it by shapeshifting without horns

because she knows Jasper doesn't have them anymore

have Jasper lapse back into being a Rampant Bitch sometimes at characters who don't deserve it and have Amethyst, the feral child not long enough ago, react badly

Jaakusan:

yesssssssss

Harinezumiko:

like I know this suffers from I Just Want Jasper Screentime

but the writers ALREADY SKIPPED SHOWING US BARN GAYS DEVELOPING ON SCREEN

have Jasper be an outsider who thinks it's Weird and Wrong for different reasons than Steven but have them join in their goal to make Earth home again because they've both lost that

also have literally every other quartz on Earth awkwardly defaulting to assuming Connie's mom and/or Barb are agates

[rhiezus]

Reputation As Our Ships

Ready For It?

For starters, this album takes a heavy road into Julie and Valak’s relationship that came out of the blue between us one night, exactly like they are. However, I had to admit the first time I was listening to this song I thought about Zeev and Eleanor, but well, I might just have been crazy or a little right, who knows? Anyways is totally Julie and Valak, even the music video, there is something about the song... The strong bass and stuff, it’s uGH tHEm!

“ I, I, I see how this is gon' go Touch me and you'll never be alone I-Island breeze and lights down low No one has to know [...]”

The “no one has to know” part. Also this description from genius:  “Touch me, and you’ll never be alone” might be in reference to the trappings of Taylor’s fame; the paparazzi follow her everywhere, so they would inevitably follow her boyfriend, too. Talk about dispatch, am I right?

“In the middle of the night, in my dreams You should see the things we do, baby In the middle of the night in my dreams I know I'm gonna be with you, so I take my time”

I love how genius mention that she talks about sex for the most part of this song, which recalls the fact that Julie and Valak relationship was built through her losing her virginity with him. The part when she sings “let the games begin”, it was like Julie knew it was a whole puzzle but she did it anyway because she was looking for an excuse not expecting that Valak would become much more than it one day. Also, the “i know im gonna be with you, so i take my time”, is truly the feeling which leads them to get marry, they just knew they would be together, so why waste time?

End Game

Who we kidding? We all know this is Linlin and Mingyu, again it has something to do with the vibe of the song too. Like there is she singing and then a bunch of rappers... UgH! Please ONG concerts give a collab May-b rapping line feat Xiulin with this song so I can die happy. aNYwAYs, my mind was also associating this song to Nayoung and Keun, am I crazy? Maybe? No? It’s lyrics time to tell that.

“We do the most, I'm in the Ghost like I'm whippin’ a boat I got a reputation, girl that don't precede me (Yeah) I'm one call away whenever you need me (Yeah) I'm in a G5 (Yeah), come to the A-Side (Yeah)”

The “one call away” kind of guy from Samara.

“I don’t wanna hurt you, I just wanna be Drinking on a beach with you all over me I know what they all say (I know what they all say) But I ain't tryna play”

Literally dying from the “beach” part because both Mingyu and Keun are from Jeju.

“Even when we’d argue, we'd not do it for long And you understand the good and bad end up in the song For all your beautiful traits, and the way you do it with ease For all my flaws, paranoia, and insecurities”

Oh my god, this song just couldn’t get any worse... “end up in the song”.

I Did Something Bad

Okay, hold up. This is Chihye. I could say Julie too because all of the drama, but honestly, is Chihye she has her fair load of bad stuff she did and I don’t see her as the type who regrets any of it, so this title is hers.

“They say I did something bad Then why's it feel so good? They say I did something bad But why's it feel so good? Most fun I ever had And I'd do it over and over and over again if I could It just felt so good, good”

Literally, no remorse and it can sound bad to think of my character that way but honestly, she is just messed up in the head, so... Whatever.

“This is how the world works You gotta leave before you get left”

I mean... Shut up.

Don’t Blame Me

Haha, this one is for you Hansol and Chan-u. I just couldn’t think of anyone else though, it has something to do with the vibe of the song again... I mean, these two have a little trouble in the head mostly *read chihye hansol’s mom above rs* and well, dead parents... So, just a little bit of affection is enough to crack their heads, so, this is to those dark times.

“Don't blame me, love made me crazy If it doesn't, you ain't doin' it right Lord, save me, my drug is my baby I'll be usin' for the rest of my life”

Am I right? Wait up there is more:

“And baby, for you, I would fall from grace Just to touch your face If you walk away, I'd beg you on my knees to stay”

Okay, genius doesn’t say anything about this but since they both gay I’m taking the hint that “beg you on my knees” could be a reference to oral sex, k? Leave me alone to think about it.

“I get so high, oh! Every time you're, every time you're lovin' me You're lovin' me Trip of my life, oh! [...]”

The “so high”, oh jesus. Also the part when she says “I once was poison ivy, but now I'm your daisy” sounds so much like a Hansol lyrics because he is always talking about flowers and relationships *see fresh roses*.

Delicate

Okay, hear me out... I never in a million years expected this ship that just came to my mind, like never and I listened to this song like a dozen times (actually 29 according to lastfm, but before i had a lastfm i would listen in youtube so... a dozen), but I just thought that the vibe and the lyrics... Sounds so much like Jinah and Bokyum. And what is shooking is that it’s also another total random ship... Ruy and Hai. Listen up:

“This ain't for the best My reputation's never been worse, so You must like me for me… We can't make Any promises now, can we, babe? But you can make me a drink”

First, for Jinah is totally about her reputation of being a prostitute ha, it’s like, she never really had a real relationship for real before Bokyum and she takes her time with her feelings after Jeju. And in the other hand, Ruy is just madly in love with Hai but he can’t bear to say it because it will scare him away so... Both delicate.

“Dive bar on the East Side, where you at? Phone lights up my nightstand in the black Come here, you can meet me in the back Dark jeans and your Nikes, look at you”

Starting with Jinah and Bokyum, in my mind when they first hooked up in Jeju they went to this lowkey bar by a corner next to the beach... And that’s when it all happened. But for the most part, this is straight-up Ruy and Hai’s relationship so it’s even sad to read it twice, jeez.

“Sometimes I wonder when you sleep Are you ever dreaming of me? Sometimes when I look into your eyes I pretend you're mine, all the damn time 'Cause I like you”

Yeah, this part is just straight up Ruy to Hai.

“Is it cool that I said all that? Is it chill that you're in my head? 'Cause I know that it's delicate (Delicate) (Yeah, I want you)”

Last one, read the genius: Taylor uses repetition and questions throughout the chorus to show how anxious she is at the beginning of this relationship. Getting romantically involved with someone can be tough because sometimes one may not know where the other stands, hence why Taylor describes this phase as “delicate.” So yeah.

Look What You Made Me Do

I can’t think of anyone else for this song other then Haneul, but as a joke not like a literal disses to someone other than herself, you know? Because no one of my characters literally changed so much because of something someone did to them, other than, well Chihye and Haneul... What a weird flex. But Haneul was more like “wide awake” than actual bad like Chihye, so it’s hard to tell. Yeah, I don’t know, don’t really have anything else for this song.

"I'm sorry, the old Taylor can't come to the phone right now "Why? Oh, 'cause she's dead!" (Oh)

This is just definitely Haneul, because: I needed to grow up in many ways. I needed to make boundaries, to figure out what was mine and what was the public’s. That old version of me that shares unfailingly and unblinkingly with a world that is probably not fit to be shared with? I think that’s gone. But it was definitely just, like, a fun moment in the studio with me and Jack [Antonoff] where I wanted to play on the idea of a phone call.

So It Goes...

I don’t really like this song, so whatever. Can’t think of anyone for it.

Gorgeous

I just can’t this is literally the song that made Jinhyung and Kyungri, I die every time because there isn’t a lyric from this that is just not them.

“You should take it as a compliment That I got drunk and made fun of the way you talk You should think about the consequence Of your magnetic field being a little too strong”

I’m going to take reference from your own “type of girlfriend: Kyungri”, she literally takes pride into making fun of Jinhyung and it’s a good thing it means she is into him in a way she can’t explain. That’s literally how they happened.

“You make me so happy it turns back to sad There's nothing I hate more than what I can't have And you are so gorgeous it makes me so mad”

I listened to this song like thousand times just because of them at the time, which is funny ‘cause know sometimes we forgot who birthed the relationships for the new romantics... It’s only a few months old but whenever I think of them there is this sweet nostalgia, it’s really funny.

Getaway Car

This song is for both cheaters: Chihye and Julie. They are very much referenced in this album, but it’s not my fault Taylor Swift did a whole album about such screwed up love. This song became one of my favorites once I realized it’s about a love triangle, where is trying to get away from her past relationship to be with the guy she actually likes without cheating on him but inevitably doing it. Does it ring a bell yet?

“It was the best of times, the worst of crimes I struck a match and blew your mind But I didn't mean it And you didn’t see it [...] I wanted to leave him I needed a reason”

Talking about Chihye and Lian, all the time she was with Pyongho it was just because he was doing her a favor and she wanted someone to want her back. But when Lian came back, it was useless so she was just ready to leave everything behind and run away with him like it was meant to be. In the hand, Julie really cherished Kaili but her mind was somewhere else: her career and the fact that it wasn’t gonna last anyway, so she just needed a solid reason to leave him.

“It was the great escape, the prison break The light of freedom on my face But you weren't thinkin’ And I was just drinkin’ Well, he was runnin' after us, I was screamin’, "Go, go, go!" But with three of us, honey, it's a sideshow And a circus ain't a love story And now we're both sorry”

It’s funny because for me it begins talking about Chihye, Lian and Pyongho and ends up in Julie, Valak and Kaili.

“Until I switched to the other side To the other si-i-i-i-ide It's no surprise I turned you in (Oh-oh) 'Cause us traitors never win I'm in a getaway car I left you in a motel bar Put the money in a bag and I stole the keys That was the last time you ever saw me”

Now, this is just about Chihye to Lian when she finds out she pregnant of Pyongho, “us traitors never win”. So yeah, I really love this song because of it’s whole metaphor.

King Of My Heart

I had this idea that this song was Zeev and Eleanor, and don’t get me wrong it still is but right now it’s also Chang and Yehjin, a little bit. Seriously, I just know Eleanor calls Zeev things like “king of my heart” and she is totally into Taylor Swift, she is american and is from New Mexico, she might even listen to Taylor’s country albums.

“I'm perfectly fine, I live on my own I made up my mind, I'm better off bein' alone We met a few weeks ago Now you try on callin' me "Baby" like tryin' on clothes”

C’mon? I mean, it was totally like that how the chat went and their whole relationship... But this first part just also reminded me of Yehjin about Chang too, I don’t know, fight me.

“Salute to me, I'm your American queen And you move to me like I'm a Motown beat And we rule the kingdom inside my room 'Cause all the boys and their expensive cars With their Range Rovers and their Jaguars Never took me quite where you do”

IM YOUR AMERICAN QUEEN. Literally Eleanor, the fact that they had sex in like their second date and also how she never really had a boyfriend like Zeev before, who just drives her crazy by being so himself. And Yehjin mentioning she prefers Chang’s bike than the rich boys range rovers, haha.

“Late in the night, the city's asleep Your love is a secret I'm hoping, dreaming, dying to keep Change my priorities The taste of your lips is my idea of luxury”

About Zeev being famous and Eleanor actually being into it because she literally just wants him to herself, “change my priorities”. And Yehjin, keeping a secret about Chang to her parents for I don’t even know how long...

Dancing With Our Hands Tied

Weird flex, okay? But my mind associated this first with Clay and Allen... Then it totally went to Linlin and Mingyu, I don’t know, something to do with the vibe. Oh, and Julie and Valak too, again, sorry.

"I, I loved you in secret First sight, yeah, we love without reason [...] My, my love had been frozen Deep blue, but you painted me golden”

It was the “love in secret” that connected these three couples in my mind, see? Here is genius about dancing with our hands tied: To have one’s hands tied is to have no control of a situation. While dancing is supposed to be a liberating form of self-expression, as well as a fun activity for friends and couples, here it represents the inability to keep their relationship away from the public eye. Taylor and her partner had their hands tied in that their relationship would eventually go public.

“And darling, you had turned my bed into a sacred oasis People started talking, putting us through our paces I knew there was no one in the world who could take it I had a bad feeling”

It’s weird because even if those three couples dated in secret, each one had a different way of coming out to the public. First, we have Clay and Allen that were “dating” in and off on the internet, until Allen moved and they actually went out but still people only found out when Clay left May-b, before I guess there was just rumors of Clay being gay or stuff like that. But Clay never really talked about relationships before leaving May-b and writing his own stuff, being his own artist. Linlin and Mingyu were this rollercoaster relationship that most people didn’t know of right at the beginning, and when they did there was always this vibe that it wasn’t going to last. And with Julie and Valak we know really well how this went, although both didn’t care much about it after it happened because it just weirdly made them be even more together.

Dress

Haha, who this? I mean it, seriously. It’s Hana and Mark, finally, one song of this album hits its peak by being theirs. But, not so fast I thought about Danbi and Daehyun too just right now. Let’s take a ride.

“All of this silence and patience, pining and anticipation My hands are shaking from holding back from you All of this silence and patience, pining and desperately waiting”

Both Hana and Danbi had big crushes from the start, both were stupid enough not to admit.

“Say my name and everything just stops I don't want you like a best friend Only bought this dress so you could take it off Carve your name into my bedpost”

Both are really furry in bed, both would totally buy a dress just to be taken off (Hana actually did and said it so). Also, both got in deep love really fast, Danbi and Daehyun even got married to prove their love, even if was later a mistake, but they meant every feeling they had. Hana, on the other hand, doesn’t ever regret how fast things happened with Mark, it was exactly how it was supposed to be.

“And I woke up just in time Now I wake up by your side My one and only, my lifeline I woke up just in time Now I wake up by your side My hands shake, I can't explain this”

Exactly what I said before *see above*.

This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things

Another diss from Haneul. I’m kidding, ha. Also, this is Julie, 7sins and the whole drama. Also, Nayoung to the old crew with the nameless that she used to hang out with *see I Forgot That You Existed*.

Call It What You Want

Here is to another song of Eleanor and Zeev, a classic, one of the songs of them that are simply just them which makes me listen like a dozen times... However, just right now I thought about Minhye and Jukan too, it’s the vibe, listen:

“My baby's fit like a daydream Walking with his head down I'm the one he's walking to So call it what you want, yeah Call it what you want to My baby's fly like a jet stream High above the whole scene Loves me like I'm brand new ”

It’s so sweet, it’s like these two dorks really don’t care about Eleanor’s and Minhye’s screwed up past with love, you know? “loves me like i’m brand new”.

“And I know I make the same mistakes every time Bridges burn, I never learn At least I did one thing right I did one thing right I'm laughing with my lover, makin' forts under covers Trust him like a brother Yeah, you know I did one thing right Starry eyes sparkin' up my darkest night”

These two also really don’t care about the whole “keep a secret” kind of relationship, they respect their lovers because they made them better people. So they just do everything in their power to protect them just the same, even if it sounds cheesy and stupid of them, they just don’t care.

“I want to wear his initial on a chain 'round my neck Chain 'round my neck Not because he owns me But 'cause he really knows me Which is more than they can say, I I recall late November Holding my breath, slowly, I said "You don't need to save me But would you run away with me?" Yes”

This is also one of my favorite songs of this album, mainly because of this part. Like I said, both Eleanor and Minhye were screwed up’s, but with Zeev and Jukan they became better people not only to themselves but for them too... Like, for the future, you know?

Wait up, I just saw Nayoung and Keun in this song too. I hate myself.

New Year’s Day

Finally, the last one, this album is so long. This is Araki and Kayn, lol. And... Anna and Kuen. Because: The closing track on reputation uses a New Year’s party as a metaphor to discuss holding on to people and memories from both good and bad times. Taylor recognizes that when the ‘parties’ in her life are over and the ‘new year’ begins, such memories are all she will have left to hold on to and learn from. She relates a lasting love to someone who shares a midnight kiss with you on New Year’s, but who still stays with you the next morning for the aftermath of the party and begins the new year together with you.

“Don’t read the last page But I stay when you're lost, and I'm scared And you’re turning away I want your midnights But I'll be cleaning up bottles with you on New Year's Day”

This is too sad, wait. But yeah, I can see both these ships.

“You squeeze my hand three times in the back of the taxi I can tell that it's gonna be a long road I'll be there if you're the toast of the town, babe Or if you strike out and you're crawling home”

According to genius, squeezing someone’s hand three times means you love them or at least its like a “take care. You see, both ships here have a thing for leaving. I don’t know which road will Araki and Kayn take but this song reminds me of their relationship a lot, you know the whole after party thing? And to Anna and Kuen who had shared a long list of back and forth but that eventually got together for good after they realized they couldn’t be strangers to one another, which takes me to:

“Please don't ever become a stranger Whose laugh I could recognize anywhere Please don't ever become a stranger Whose laugh I could recognize anywhere”

So yeah, that’s the best way to end this album. With something good to think about.

[bisluthq]

Dude to the “my tay” anon I just wanna say that Taylor literally said she would DIE for Joe in 2 of her songs. That’s hectic bruh she loves him A LOT and if you wish that he leaves her or betrays her then you are directly wishing misery on her no questions asked. She said “ if someone comes at US(both her and Joe and their rs) this time she’s ready” which indirectly means she’ll cut you freaks in half and watch you burn alive for that guy so let’s start there babes. She doesn’t care about you all please get therapy besties therapy is the key I swear.

I agree no one should manifest misery on her. If Joe leaves her she'd be devastated. I think we all know how much she loves him. He doesn't love her the same way obviously but for her sake I hope this relationship lasts. I am sure he will do just fine without her.

WHAT MAKES YOU SAY THAT AND WHY DO YOU WITH YOUR WHOLE CHEST BELIEVE YOU KNOW THE FEELINGS OF STRANGERS?

Why do you need him to love her less and why do you need her to be pathetic and not be able to tell when she’s being treated badly? Why would this make you feel better?

My guess is it’s because you want to love her more than he does but guess what? You don’t lmao and you wouldn’t last ONE MINUTE in his life because the shit he deals with - starting with freaks like you, continuing to antis, and ending with actual real life stalkers - is not something you’d do for someone you don’t fucking adore.

And you don’t love her. You don’t KNOW her. You love her music and the idea of her and if people were threatening to murder you to get to her you would realistically not deal because highkey Taylor Swift is your idea of therapy.

I don’t know either of them but like I assume people together for 6 years and overcoming adversity and shit side by side love one another.

And I also think Tay’s slow retreat from fandom shows we’re bad for her mental health so maybe think why that is because bestie you’re for sure part of the problem and like as am I but idc right and you clearly fucking do.

Repeat after me: Taylor Swift knows what’s best for Taylor Swift, she doesn’t know I exist nor does she care although she appreciates her fanbase and she is grateful to us and she is kind and good and loving but she cannot possibly have personal feelings for us as strangers, I love her music and am grateful for it, she inspires me, and I’m glad she’s found personal happiness and hope it lasts.

Repeat it until you believe it.

[salmankhanholics]

★ Why Salman Khan Is Unstoppable!

28 JUNE 2018  GIRIDHAR JHA

Salman Khan is running no race, he’s riding high on pure stardom. Content be damned.

#Law and order under the Modi government has gone for a toss. I put two tickets of Race 3 in my car. Some idiots broke the window and left two more.

A surfeit of tweets—some hilarious, others acerbic—has swamped social media of late, cocking a snook at Salman Khan’s latest outing, Race 3, as ‘the biggest bore of the decade’ and ‘a sure-shot cure for the insomniacs’. This year’s much-vaunted Eid release has been mauled just as savagely by film critics, a few of them trashing it as simply insufferable.

Worse still, the film has made it to the IMDb list of ‘lowest-rated movies’ where it shares the dubious distinction with the likes of  Ram Gopal Varma Ki Aag (2007), The Legend of Drona (2008), Tees Maar Khan (2010), Himmatwala (2013), Humshakals (2014) and Kya Kool Hain Hum 3(2016)—all unmitigated disasters of our times.

In fact, some of Salman’s die-hard followers appear to be so disappointed with this movie that they have, for once, asked him not to take them for granted. ““Bhai,, don’t do films like Race 3,” a distraught fan tweeted in anguish after seeing the film. “It is not up to your standard.”

Under the best of circumstances, such reactions ought to have set off the alarm bells for a lesser star, but not the reigning monarch of B-town. Far from it, Bhai, as Salman is affectionately called, is having the last chuckle—he’s laughing out loud all the way to the bank. Remo D’Souza’s directorial venture has already crossed a commercial milestone, having notched up more than Rs 160 crore in India and Rs 250 crore worl­dwide in just about ten days. Quite an achievement for a film pilloried for its tacky plot, sloppy direction and deadpan acting!

But then, in an industry where stars are made and maimed every Friday, nothing matters more than what a movie ultimately earns at the ticket window. Race 3 may have been dismissed as a veritable affront to the aesthetic sense and sensibility by many a connoisseur of good cinema, but its box-­office figures have only underlined the enduring mass appeal of the 52-year-old warhorse, who remains a darling of the dress circle regardless of his receding hairline and protracted court cases.

But why is a star with unexceptional histrionic prowess still so popular with the masses? What are the factors that have sustained him as an alchemist at the cash counters? Ali Abbas Zafar, director of two of Salman’s recent blockbusters, Sultan (2016) and Tiger Zinda Hai (2017), puts it conclusively: “It is very important for a superstar to connect, communicate and maintain a relationship with his audiences through his films. I think the audiences see absolute honesty in the way he leads his personal life, as also in the way he portrays his roles,” Zafar tells Outlook. “It invariably touches a chord with the audiences who flock to the theatres to watch his films over and over again. It’s a factor that simply cannot be defined.”

Zafar, now at the helm of Salman’s next, Bharat, believes every movie has its own journey and destiny as far as commercial success is concerned. “We cannot measure it against the superstardom of an actor. While making a movie, nobody knows whether it will click or not,” he says. “It is something indescribable.”

The young auteur thinks that he is fortunate to have worked with as big a superstar as Salman at the outset of his career. “As a director, it is absolutely essential to highlight the USP of a big star in the best possible way,” he says. “You have to develop the character in sync with the superstardom.”

Zafar avers that the audiences are disappointed only when they find a star’s stardom putting his character in the shade. “But if the character and the stardom complement each other, as they did in Sultan, Tiger Zinda Hai and Bajrangi Bhaijaan (2015), then it creates pure magic,” he states.

Noted scriptwriter Rajat Arora considers Salman’s loyal fan base to be the biggest factor behind his success.  “What is remarkable is that people from all age groups, from kids to elderly people, like him. In fact, the release of his movie is a celebration of sorts of the star, idolised by his legions of followers.”

Arora, who scripted the Salman blo­ckbuster Kick (2014), says that is why nine of his movies have done business of more than Rs 100 crore while four others crossed the Rs 200-300-crore mark. “He has really worked hard over the years to maintain his stardom. He simply gives to his audiences what they really like to see.”

Figures, of course, don’t lie. Salman has had an unparalleled run in the past decade or so. Since Dabangg (2010), his 13 consecutive movies have minted more than Rs 100 crore, a figure considered to be the benchmark for a Bollywood blockbuster. Only a couple of them, such as Jai Ho (2014) and Tubelight (2017), are considered flops. But that is because of their high production costs; otherwise they too made it to the elite 100 crore club effortlessly.

Curiously, all this has happened des­pite Salman’s apparently cavalier attitude towards his career. At a time when his illustrious contemporaries—Aamir Khan and Shahrukh Khan, the other two of the holy tinsel town trinity—are constantly striving for content-driven cinema, commensurate with their expertise and experience, the youngest of the three 1965-born Khans functions within his own world, relying more on his popularity than the script of his movie. More often than not, he takes up a project purely for emotional reasons and shows no qualms in helping out his family members and friends in bolstering their careers. From Sonakshi Sinha in Dabangg to Athiya Shetty and Suraj Pancholi in Hero (2015), many star kids owe their launches to him. As for Race 3, he has gone a step further, as its ent­ire cast, save Anil Kapoor, app­ears to be piggybacking on his charisma. High on his success, Salman seems to care too little for the criticism that he turns a movie into an extended family enterprise these days.

Critics, however, believe that the Midas touch may not last for long. “He’s not serious about picking good subjects. I thought Salman had turned a new leaf with Bajrangi Bhaijaan and Sultan but Race 3 demolished my hopes,” rues film writer Deepak Dua. “The film has too many non-actors who are in it primarily because of their close ties with him.”

Dua says Salman probably knows his range as an actor and that’s why he restricts himself to his comfort zone of masala entertainers, unlike Sha­h­rukh and Aamir. “Let alone Aamir, even Shahrukh has been trying to do things differently since the days of Phir Bhi Dil Hai Hindustani(2000) and Asoka (2001),” he says. “It’s an altogether different matter that he has not been successful in that.”

Dua fears that Salman, at this juncture of his career, may end up committing the same blunder as yesteryear star Dhar­mendra. “Dha­r­mendra did many eminently forgettable act­ion flicks like Bag­­havat (1982) and Hukumat (1987),” he says. “I am afraid Salman is veering tow­ards the same rut, playing a he-man over and over again. Race 3 is yet another pointer to that, ” he adds.

Race 3’s success, Dua points out, is the outcome of a number of factors. “The film benefited from the brand name of the Race franchise, besides Salman’s superstardom,” he says. “Also, it was released on Eid, an occasion when even his really bad movies have done well. But it has to be borne in mind that the success of a bad movie like Race 3 will only spawn films of similar or worse quality.”

The audiences see absolute honesty in the way he leads his real and reel lives,” says Sultan director Ali Abbas Zafar.

Trade pundits, however, see the success of Race 3, in spite of the trenchant criticism, as yet ano­t­her confirmation of the saleability of Brand Salman. “Jaako raakhe Salman, maar sake naa critics (No critic can harm a Salman project,)” says veteran film trade expert Atul Mohan, twisting a popular adage used by the actor in Race 3.

Mohan, the editor of Complete Cinema, further says that Salman has never been serious about film scripts and yet he has been consistently delivering what the audiences like. “Without the audience’s support, it would not have been possible for Race 3 to earn Rs 160 crore in the first ten days of its release,” he elaborates.

Mohan even goes to the extent of saying that the criticism against and the potshots at Race 3 on social media are part of a ‘sinister campaign’ by a few people who are acting with vested interests. “When somebody becomes popular, certain people try to bring him down,” he says. “In the case of Race 3, social media was used by many as a tool to harm the prospects of Salman’s movie. But people are still flocking to theatres, despite all the trolling.”

That probably sums up the prolonged magic that Salman has cast on the audiences in recent years. Even though most of his movies are bereft of the nous of an Aamir-starrer or the purpose of a Shahrukh project, he remains the ultimate talisman at the box office—somebody who wears his X-factor like  armour and lives by what his character says in the film Kick; “Dil mein aata hoon, samajh mein nahin (I come into the heart,  not the mind.)”

[celiastjamesoscar]

Hi darling! I noticed I never shared my thoughts for No Hard Feelings, and with part 3 coming up, I thought I'd catch up. It's a bit much cause it's both for parts 1 and 2.

Nah nah nah. Sam can't fool anyone. She secretly enjoys Tara's little fucker energy, so she is a huge fan or R.

Sam is, to some extent, obviously saying no to Tara and Mindys choices out of pure spite because she is a petty grump but also because she is probably scared of letting someone new into her life. She would rather die than admit that she is scared of getting hurt again and trusting someone new. Bitchie (he who shall not be named) hurt Sam in more ways than just physical. That man baby betrayed her and used her trust to invade her life and try to kill her family. Poor Sammy fears that this will happen again. It keeps her from pursuing a relationship and letting someone new into her life.

With R she likes that she can be herself, her grumpy and bitchy self, because R is accepting her for who she is. Also, Sam really does enjoy Rs sass and stupid jokes. It makes her feel much more relaxed and comfortable with R. Sam's love language is definitely slight bullying/teasing and soft moments.

Now, I think that Sam definitely is a bit mad at herself for falling for R because she rather wants to stay guarded to protect herself. Sam is secretly very insecure; her job, her past and the fear of what could happen kinda makes her feel small and ashamed. She wants to "save/protect" R from that and herself. Her self-esteem is, despite her outwardly confident persona, very low. Thanks to baby duck Bitchie and Woodsboro. Sam is quick to act. She doesn't always think things through and when it comes to feelings she's very stubborn, so it's actually no surprise that instead of talking to R about everything, she chose to run away. To not only prevent her own heart from getting hurt again but also to "protect" R from herself. She doesn't think she's worthy of being with her. Her self doubt is stronger than her desire to have a new relationship.

A few more comments:

- This R is my favorite. She's a menace, absolutely hilarious, her sass is unmatched and she's just a lovely idiot.

- Sam not knowing what pics means is SO in character! Boomer Sam is real. The kys sent me over the edge. I can just image Sam wanting to be sweet and sending that so seriously. Poor baby didn't know better. I love it.

- Honestly I also wanna stare at Sam's boobs. Sam in general is a work of art.

- Sam's banter is THE best. You really are so talented when it comes to writing engaging and captivating characters.

I hope you're doing well and slaying college!

I have been waiting on your No Hard Feelings review for so long!!!

R accepting Sam for who she is, is the biggest thing that made Sam fall for her. She’s never had someone in her life accept with the open arms that R has, and that scares the shit out of her. Hell, even Tara screamed at Sam when she opened up about her father being Billy and revealing the real reason she left Tara. This person that she “hates” is the first person to look at her and say “You’re a grumpy old man and a bitch. But you’re MY grumpy old man and a bitch.”

Sam love language is definitely slight bullying and we will see it in the next chapter(s).

We will also see a bunch of insecurities arise in the part 3, and it will be the main reason for angst. Everything you said about Sam’s insecurities will be seen in that installment as well.

I also love this R so much!! I tried to base her personality off of my own, so I will take it as a compliment when you call her a ‘lovely idiot.’

SAM CARPENTER BOOMER AGENDA!!!!!

Again, I love your reviews so much and they bring me so much happiness!! Thank you for reading my work and analyzing it! 🤍

I’m doing good. I have an anatomy practical and a chemistry exam next week, so depending on how I do will determine how much writing I actually do for the next several weeks 😬

[woodenwedges]

1 through 100. Let's go! Answer em aaaalll!

Omg Kate you’re absolute mad!!! Thanks tho’ I love answering these things ❤️😁Hoo boy here we go!1. What is you middle name?Don’t have one! Neither does my brother.2. How old are you?203. When is your birthday?The 15th of may 🌸4. What is your zodiac sign?Taurus ♉️🐃5. What is your favorite color?Baby pink! 6. What’s your lucky number?Dunno about lucky number but my favorite number is 77. Do you have any pets?Yep! Two dogs.One sweet, blonde girl named Emsi (based on the danish word Emsig meaning officious)And a neurotic chihuahua named Henry. We got them both cause their owners no longer could take care of them and I love them to the moon and back ❤️8. Where are you from?Hirtshals in Denmark! I love my town to death9. How tall are you?Uuuh around like 1,65 m10. What shoe size are you?3911. How many pairs of shoes do you own?Too many.... we get a lot of free stuff so I have a lot. Probably around 10 pairs?12. What was your last dream about?The only thing I remember from my last dream was that I got a pimple on my forehead lol13. What talents do you have?I’m good at art, dancing and just performing in general and I’m getting pretty good with makeup!14. Are you psychic in any way?Nope15. Favorite song?Right now it’s brain damage and eclipse from The Dark Side of The Moonby Pink Floyd. They remind me of my mom ❤️16. Favorite movie?Don’t actually have one! But the last film I think I saw was carol and I absolutely loved it.17. Who would be your ideal partner?Just someone who’s intelligent and kind I guess! And has a similar sense of humor18. Do you want children?I do, but I’m probably never gonna birth any cause I have an illness I don’t want to risk transferring and also might be going on T soon!!19. Do you want a church wedding?I don’t really care20. Are you religious?Nah. I’m a spiritual atheist21. Have you ever been to the hospital?Only as a visitor. I’ve gone to the emergency room but I’ve never been admitted.22. Have you ever got in trouble with the law?Nope23. Have you ever met any celebrities?My cousins a model who’s dating one of the Danish x-factor judges so yea.24. Baths or showers?BATHS25. What color socks are you wearing?White. I prefer just plain whites rn, but there’s was a time in my life where I always wore fun, colorful socks and never matching them26. Have you ever been famous?Lol no but a stranger did come up to me last week and told me she’s a huge fan of my work ❤️ a lot of the locals like my watercolor portraits27. Would you like to be a big celebrity?Honestly yea I do fantasize a lot about it 28. What type of music do you like?Music is a huge part of my life! My main Spotify playlist is 161 hours now and it’s all extremely diverse!The only music I don’t particularly like is blues and trap cause i find it boring. Right now I’m really into old grungy rock, punk, experimental stuff, rap and disco 💃🏼 29. Have you ever been skinny dipping?Sure have! I did it countless times this summer at the beach. There’s nothing more freeing than swimming naked in the ocean 💙30. How many pillows do you sleep with?Just one, but it’s a really good one. Oh and sometimes and extra one just to cuddle 31. What position do you usually sleep in?Fetus position is my fav but I’m trying not to do that cause it’s bad for your back32. How big is your house?Pretty big. Two stories plus a garage where my friends and I hang out. And also a two bedroom annex33. What do you typically have for breakfast?Toast or oatmeal with nuts and berries34. Have you ever fired a gun?No35. Have you ever tried archery?I tried it a couple of weeks ago and it was really fun! 36. Favorite clean word?I like words like clean and crystal and chemical 37. Favorite swear word?Fuck.38. What’s the longest you’ve ever gone without sleep?Don’t remember. Pretty long. But I’ve started to be very careful with sleep cause my mental health REALLY depends on it39. Do you have any scars?Lots. Anything from self-harm to getting burned by a marshmallow lmao40. Have you ever had a secret ?Bitch my whole personality used to be a secret. So yea a lot41. Are you a good liar?Yup. I’m very creative and anxious so if I feel like I’ve done something I shouldn’t I immediately have a good lie ready. Also I’ve had some problems with compulsive lying whoops42. Are you a good judge of character?Nooo not really cause I always feel bad for disliking ppl so I force myself to keep an open mind. But I’ve learned to just follow my instincts a bit more43. Can you do any other accents other than your own?I’m pretty good at like southern American accents and also an American accent In Danish is so fun and cute. 44. Do you have a strong accent?It’s pretty strong. I used to fake a British accent out of embarrassment but then I started feeling pretentious so I let it go45. What is your favorite accent?I love a Colombian accent and French ofc. Also Indian and Chinese. Oh and a lot of African ones too, especially the ppl from Congo! But I love accents in general. They’re literally my go to ASMR trigger46. What is your personality type?INFP47. What is your most expensive piece of clothing?My winter jacket... my mom wanted to buy me one that was new and when we finally found one that didn’t give me dysphoria I was so excited I forgot to look at the price tag... and she just bought it for me anyway.48. Can you curl your tongue?Yea and I can stick it between my tooth gap49. Are you an innie or an outie?Outie all the way50. Left or right handed?Right51. Are you scared of spiders?No, I used to have pretty severe arachnophobia but i worked through it and now I actually really love them! Also I don’t care how scared you are of them, don’t you dare kill them in front of me! That makes me so uncomfortable. Just let me know there’s a spider and I’ll get it safely outside for you 52. Favorite food?Love sushi with crab meat or fried shrimp!53. Favorite foreign food?Well probably sushi? Lol. Or anything Italian!54. Are you a clean or messy person?Super messy but I’m trying my best!55. Most used phrased?“Bid I det sure æble”. Basically “bite the bullet” in English 56. Most used word?Probably bitch. I use it in an affectionate manner towards friends lmao57. How long does it take for you to get ready?Very, very long58. Do you have much of an ego?Yea I think so59. Do you suck or bite lollipops?Suck60. Do you talk to yourself?Nope. 61. Do you sing to yourself?Yes!62. Are you a good singer?I’m decent. Think I could get good if I got a vocal coach63. Biggest Fear?Getting ridiculed, being misunderstood and being unwanted 64. Are you a gossip?I love gossip...65. Best dramatic movie you’ve seen?I don’t really know sry!66. Do you like long or short hair?Love all hair. I love running my fingers through long hair. I prefer short hair for me tho67. Can you name all 50 states of America?LOL NO68. Favorite school subject?I really liked art and foreign language classes69. Extrovert or Introvert?HUGE introvert!70. Have you ever been scuba diving?No but I’d love to try it!71. What makes you nervous?Public embarrassment is a big one. But racism, homophobia, transphobia and misogyny will also make me very, very nervous.72. Are you scared of the dark?Not at all73. Do you correct people when they make mistakes?Depends on the mistakes? Never on like grammar and stuff like that.74. Are you ticklish?Very. I can tickle myself. But then again I am schizophrenic lol75. Have you ever started a rumor?Once in high school my friends and I started a rumor that I was “a hermaphrodite” and we kept it going for years. At first it was just to fuck with people but then I started getting like a kick from it. For some reason I loved the idea of people thinking I was intersex. Aaaand that was the start of me getting gender identity issues lol76. Have you ever been in a position of authority?I used to teach dancing lessons for kids at a local church lol does that count?77. Have you ever drank underage?Only a couple of beers. But the drinking age is here is 15 so that’s not a huge problem 78. Have you ever done drugs?a couple of times. Done ecstasy and Valium once which was really fun. And I’ve tried speed a couple of times but it has no effect on me. I also love weed if you consider that a drug 79. Who was your first real crush?Had a huge crush on a guy at my boarding school. And also a girl at the school... they became a couple and I remember wanting to die asdgsa80. How many piercings do you have?None! Had a septum once, but I never had my ears pierced as a child or anything 81. Can you roll your Rs?“Yea82. How fast can you type?Pretty fast!83. How fast can you run?I’m not a great runner but I’m getting better84. What color is your hair?Blonde85. What color is your eyes?Green86. What are you allergic to?Nothing. Tho I do get allergic reactions to extreme swifts in temperature 87. Do you keep a journal?Yup!88. What do your parents do?Both retired now but my dad used to be a fisherman and my mom ran a daycare and later worked with elderly people who suffered from dementia. 89. Do you like your age?Yea?90. What makes you angry?It takes a lot to get me angry but unnecessary hate and harassment usually gets me to tick91. Do you like your own name?I really like it actually! 92. Have you already thought of baby names, and if so what are they?I have but I don’t remember them... think I repressed those daydreams when I decided never to bear children :(93. Do you want a boy a girl for a child?Idc94. What are you strengths?Intellectuality, kindness, curiosity, creativity and bravery. Also I get a lot of praise for being so open and aware of my mental illnesses and for fighting so fiercely to get healthy. 95. What are your weaknesses?Bad self criticism, naïvety, laziness and having trouble asking for help and taking initiative 96. How did you get your name?My brother decided it.97. Were your ancestors royalty?Pff highly doubt it98. Do you have any scars?Already answered this99. Color of your bedspread?That really popular, white IKEA one with flowers100. Color of your room?White, although I cover them up with posters, drawings and sometimes literal trash when i get psychotic cause white walls make me hallucinate like crazyThis was a fucking blast!!! Thanks Kate 😚❤️

[vacationcalendar]

8/13/21

Today’s creative project, an private letter (it could have been an open letter, but who the hell is reading this besides myself and maybe the person receiving it) to Voyboy. He’s been in a rough place mentally/emotionally. He’s had some deaths in his family which is never easy, and his attempt to de-platform a twitch streamer with a known history of sexual abuse has earned him undue (and as is sadly routine, SEVERE) ire from fans of said streamer. 

It’s so weird, there’s obviously people who are like, “I’m not getting involved. I don’t care enough to inform myself well enough to have an opinion.” And those people are also split into camps that either approve or disapprove of “rocking the boat” as it were. Some people think this level of calling-out is too incendiary for the offense. Some people find the subject uncomfortable and wish it would go away, with the unfortunate default to that view being an acquiescence of justice for the accused.

And some people are also hung up on the justice part in particular. This entire affair is being conducted in the infamous “Court of Public Opinion.” A forum that has been dragged out MUCH more frequently in this modern age than in history. That fact alone upsets people. Hell, it’s bothered me in the past. I see the Court of Public Opinion make a ruling, and I think, “I didn’t elect this Judge, I did not approve this jury, there is no precedent here!”

It does feel like things are moving fast. They are. Dan Harmon said in an interview earlier this month, “Progress isn’t a scalpel, it’s an avalanche.” And he welcomed it. We should be welcoming progress. Even if it’s messy. Some might say “especially if it’s messy!” I don’t know who is saying that, but I feel in my gut someone on twitter would say that and get 80.3k likes. I know my Twitter.

I digress. Some people are of the view that they can’t be the judge. Leave it up to the real judges and let me just do whatever it was that I was going to do, please. So when Voyboy does all this work to put a spotlight on this problem, people see him handing them a pitchfork and come help him kill The Beast. And some people balk at that. Some people shy away, and just stay inside (this is mostly me, I’ll admit. The inside people go, “I didn’t watch that guy anyway, this is all fine with me! Now please leave me alone”). And some say, “Hey man, I’m opposed to violence, and by the way, the Beast is a really chill guy if you ever got to know him. In fact, people like you who are so quick to hand out pitchforks to make yourself look like some noble saint are actually pieces of shit!” And then a bunch of that guy’s friend go “Yeah, he is a piece of shit!” because that’s how bullying works. And then the bullies spend all day trapped in their miserable bodies, stuck in their miserable lives. And they go on Twitch and watch their friend stream to them, and their friend makes them feel wanted for once in their shit existence. And then later they’re on twitter and see Voyboy say something about how your friend’s an abusive monster and needs to see justice, and you KNOW that it’s all bullshit, and Voyboy just trying to get points with his girlfriend or something, he doesn’t care at all. What an asshole. Fuck him. Fuck this loser. I should reply to him, since it’s the easiest thing in the world for anyone to do. And generally people don’t follow people they hate like this, so that would limit this extremely toxic interaction, but Voyboy is followed by all the LoL streamers, so people that follow league generally hear from all the content creator’s in the community. And maybe they’re streamer friend mentioned that Voyboy was a fake ass cuck or whatever on stream and told his followers to go check out the shit he was spewing. 

So Voyboy says grooming is unacceptable and disgusting, sexting teens is deplorable. And we as a modern community don’t need to hear him beat a rap sheet like that in court to act, because we as a community have the power to shape it how we see fit. And under that tweet is 100 replies saying that he’s a piece of shit and should die.

And then the uninformed masses see that and go, “why is Voyboy a piece of shit?? What am I missing?” And then they see Voyboy tweet something like “this is really hard, these guys are out to get me but I won’t back down.” And if you’re like me you think, “Oh I’ve never supported this kind of drama in my life. This is boring at best and uncomfortable at worst. Let’s all stop (aka bail)!” And then Voyboy goes “I won’t!” And then everyone level-headed and sane goes “boo, I’m bored, knock this off!” And everyone that is now LIVING for this bullying. I mean, what a payout. You bully this dude every day and he feeds you attention every time? This rules! So the detractors get WORSE and the supporters settle down. And Voyboy has now learned the harsh truth of social justice. It just beats you down. Everyone’s in this game for themselves; the moment you set aside your own interest to help someone else out, you are instantly and forever outnumbered. And the whole time you’re just like, “what the fuck is so hard about this? I am proposing an objectively good idea that would make everyone happier! I only even started trying to say something because I knew I was right! This is like getting fired for hitting a home run!”

I’m learning, and I should say digesting maybe, more about power this year than I have in a long time. It’s the answer to a lot of equations that don’t add up under my current philosophies. Like if everything I think is true, then was does X Y and Z still happen? Why do I feel like ____? The answer is something to do with power. And I’m starting to figure out what that is. Ha, I think part of me is a little ashamed it’s taking this long, I guess. Like, I’M learning it, but it’s been learnt. I’m catching up. But that’s ok. That’s literally all I’m doing. Catching up. Keeping up. I’m not even trying to do something once I’m caught up. I just don’t think there’s any other place to be. Well, I mean, I would truly hate to write something that got read that was just plain not-caught-up. Something that would make a reader go, “hey, doesn’t he know better?” I SHOULD. That’s literally the goal.

Anyways, I’ve lost my train of thought, and need a bathroom break. Here’s the letter I sent to Voyboy, to try and help him through all this. Talk to you tomorrow love ;) : Hey Voy I hope you are doing better, and I hope you get a chance to read this. I started League of Legends back in Season 1 when I was in college. I remember the first time I heard of you, you were one the few people ahead of HotshotGG in the rankings, and I remember thinking, "what the hell, how did this kid get so lucky?!" lol. Then I got to see you play with RS, and mostly thought you were lucky again to be getting carried by Scarra 🤣 I'm sorry! By the time you joined CLG I finally caught wise. You became one of my all-time favorite players on the scene. Your Olaf looked like a cheat code, I swear to god. I love League of Legends so much, and back in college I spent almost every waking minute thinking about it. It was one of my great passions. And at that time I was struggling to find anything else I was truly passionate about. I got depressed in college, and by that point I had realized my goal of being an engineer wasn't something I actually cared about. So I dropped out. I was in a truly dark place. I felt like life had left me behind and that I was worthless. I still had League, but League couldn't give me what I needed. I have this distinct memory from one of my last games in Season 4 where some Ranked Soloqueue bs was making my blood boil out of my body. I literally had to stand up and walk around outside after the game. I was pissed, but I knew the real reason was because I just wasn't good enough. That was the moment I realized I was never going to get to walk the path of Voyboy or Doublelift, I was not going to be one of the great ones that League would pick up and give them an opportunity to do something great. I would need to find something of my own.

After that League stopped being as fun for me. I knew I had to do something else with my life and League was only holding me back. All my friends I knew through League started to feel less like my friends. So I quit. After almost 4 years nonstop. And the years after that only looked worse. I was still depressed, still struggling desperately to find my way, and now the thing that brought me the most joy in the world was long gone from my life.

Five years went by and over that time I moved, got a real job, and somehow became a real adult. Life was still hard work, but I was now ready for it. I bought myself a real gaming computer after using crummy laptops my entire life. And once I realized I could finally see LoL at something other than the lowest graphics setting, I decided to download it again. I don't need to tell you that coming back 5 years away made League feel like a completely new game. I might as well have been playing Dota for all I knew. And I felt terrible. I felt like the person that used to play this game was dead; I had no memory left in my fingers. "Well, it was worth a shot," I said.

And then I found your videos on youtube. "Hey I know him!" After just two games, it all came rushing back to me. Your games, your stream reignited my love for League of Legends. And now I'm healthier. Now I can play for a bit and return to a life I that I care equally about. I learned how to love League AND love myself; and the entire time, you were there. The Kid, with his million-watt smile, raising the bar.

I can't say I see the exact same circumstances with what you've been going through lately. I just know what that cloud can feel like. And maybe it's similar, feeling like League and the other parts of your life are at odds with each other right now. And the further away the game gets, the more you see the cracks appear. Hateful kids and useless trolls come to this game not for the experience, but to talk crap and feed their ego. It's so sad that our society still needs to work so hard to treat sexual abuse with the weight that it deserves. But I think because of that, it only highlights that you're doing work that's worth doing.

I don't know what you're planning on doing next, but no matter what it is, I'll support you. I don't know what it's worth, but you're genuinely one of my favorite people. You're worthy of love, you're worthy of happiness. You've worked hard, you've put your heart into making League of Legends a community something to be proud of. I've seen it time and time again. And it won't be for nothing, I swear.

Cya nerd, be well. Thanks

[fmdjinyoung-blog]

Idolized Preshooting Interview; MARS’ 𝓙𝓲𝓷𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓷𝓰

          We caught up with the twenty-eight year old to get a glimpse into his thoughts for the                            upcoming filming of the highly anticipated Idolized documentary.

What is life as an idol like? What are the hardships? What is rewarding?

Jinyoung’s more than thankful that he’s chosen a shirt with so many tailoring details to wear for the sit-down; he’s able to pick at the buttons here and there and to rub his thighs when he’s anxious about an answer. He’s arguably the most professional in approaching his job as an idol; he gives just enough, knows when and how to smile after saying something and where chuckles are appropriate, but the notion of explaining that job is not such an easy thing to get personal about. He gives his manager a questioning look, who urges him to continue, and so he does after clearing his throat. “Ah. Life as an idol is probably as hard as everyone imagines, but the hardships aren’t so bad if you take everything in stride. It’s fun to be on the road but all of the flights get tiring, it’s great to perform but it takes a lot of practice before hand, and it’s important to stay fit even if your body feels strain. There’s pros and cons to everything, right? All of the difficulties go away when you finish promotions or something like that, look back, and think, “Ah, I did it.”” He gets a thumbs-up. It’s a workable answer and more than expected from him.

How would you feel if your future child wanted to be an idol?

The mere assumption of his kin is enough to make a laugh bubble on the tip of his tongue but he lets it die there like a passing wave and instead clears his throat again, turning his head to the side quickly as a cautionary gesture. It’s more than unnerving for the manager who draws attention to himself more and more by the passing minute; he’s coached Jinyoung for this and yet he’s trying to go against the cold, collected image he’s always had. Why now? “If my future child wanted to be an idol, I’d support them. My father supported me in the public eye because everyone else in my family already was. If it was what I wanted to do, he was fine with it. I think there’s a lot of ways to express your love for music, and if that’s the way my child wanted to pursue it, then so be it. As long as they understood what it took and did their best, I’d say that’s alright.”

Do you think the words “artist” and “idol” mean the same thing?

Jinyoung knows how he really feels about this, he’s told his manager in honesty while they were viewing the questions in advance. The man told him to lay it on easy, rather not to be honest at all and to be very non-descript as he always is. Straight faced with stiff nods as they’d discussed. Only he doesn’t do that, for once in his career. “Idol and artist of course aren’t the same thing. They can both work as hard, that’s subjective, but objectively they’re not. An artist channels a lot of creative expression and personal touch into a lot of things. They have to create a brand and a certain image. An idol does those things to a lesser extent. An idol has different responsibilities than an artist, a creator does.” They’ll talk about it in the car.

Are there sides to you your fans don’t see?

This is a question that calms his manager’s heart rate. There’s not much Jinyoung had to say about this subject and the solid look on his face seems to project that now. “I think everyone has sides and parts of them they don’t show everyone, so yes, I probably do. I’d like to think I’m very real in my presentation though. I don’t like changing myself if I don’t have to.”

What do you hope viewers will see through the airing of this show?

His manager’s nervous again to be honest and the way Jinyoung’s cuffing and uncuffing his sleeves shows that he’s not sure about this question. The lower half of the questions Jinyoung simply didn’t have a good answer for. “Um. I hope they see through the airing of this show that...idols are not as superior or perfect as imagined. It’s easy to forget that idols and musicians are people just like everyone else, no matter how talented. This might show a new perspective.”

What do you hope you’ll get out of the experience of the show? Are there any other groups or idols you hope to get the chance to meet more through the show?

“I hope that I can learn how to have fun with others during this experience,” He answers finitely and doesn’t speak for a while, which makes his manager groan. He’s mouthing ‘more,’ so Jinyoung gives him more. “I think sometimes I don’t talk to or text others enough like I know a lot of my members in MARS do. Sometimes I’m all work and no play, which can be a bad thing. Um, I think I’d like to meet anyone more.” ‘More.’ “ I musically admire the women in Lipstick and the men of Decipher seem fun to be around. It would be cool to say hello to them.” He’s shrugging.

How do you feel about the upcoming Hallyu Triple Fantasy Concert in Jeju City?

The what? He was only briefly told about this and perhaps chose to ignore it. It wasn’t like MARS was busy, he just hasn’t taken a look at his agenda book in..forever. “I’m looking forward to it.” He provides and gets a blank expression in return. “It seems like a great opportunity for a lot of fans to come together and enjoy themselves, which is always good.”

Do you have any worries about being followed by cameras for the show?

This is something he can tackle on his own and everyone on the teams’ more than grateful it’s the last question. Jinyoung’s quick and easy to work with, but it’s a bit tense with his manager frantically waving a clipboard around the entire time. “I’m only a tiny, little bit nervous about being followed by cameras because I’m a reserved person. I like down time and I’m not interesting during it, but I’ll do my best. I want to be entertaining. I feel mostly fine though because acting involves a lot of cameras, you know? Acting is like second nature for me, and I even have a few drama prospects coming up. This is a good warm-up, no?” 

He’s in his coat, gathered with the team, and in a car within the next five minutes.

[nanaswhispers]

Loyalty.

Day 6 KLAROLINEAUWEEK : Canon-ish.

Dark Caroline. Violence. Language. Mystic Falls gang lovers this may not be for you. Steroline-rs not really your cup of tea either I guess.

Please, enjoy!

Loyalty drove her. Pushed her to give everything of herself to help the people in her life. It also made her forgive many small and great betrayals, pushed to the back of her mind every misdeed those same people she gave everything to, committed against her. She endured every time they used her and belittled her. She swallowed back so many harsh remarks and hurtful words because her loyalty and caring immured her in silence.

And yet, they betrayed again and again. And each time she forgave, but never truly forgot.

One too many times.

Every moment of anger, hurt and rage she had pushed down for years invaded her like an unstopping tsunami of darkness. The darkness of her monster she had repressed into the deepest parts of her came to light by itself. Everything that made her the good human-like Caroline was put down by the true vampire nature awakened in her.

Rage and numbness danced in her mind, switching on and off, dancing to a music nobody heard.

When she first learned about this last slight against her, Caroline hadn't believed it.

How could they use her like this? How could they think they had omnipotence over her body? How did they come to the conclusion that she would simply bear smilingly the fact that they chose for her, instead of her, to be the host to those witchy babies?

Had she been too kind, too dumb all those years for letting them think that her loyalty equals to weakness? Did she not deserve to at least be asked her opinion? Was she not a person with her own mind capable of thoughts? Would it not be her body that would carry someone else's progeny?

Sitting in front of Alaric, his lecherous eyes observing her triumphantly, and Stefan, painting a false sense of remorse on his eternally contrite face, she felt ire rising, and climbing up her throat until she had to bite back the scream she felt like releasing. But she would not show any other ounce of fragility in front of them, they did not deserve that privilege anymore.

So she did something she had hoped to never have to do, Caroline gathered every feeling and emotion she had and shut them down. They watched her face get unconstrained, her posture dangerously relax and heard a frost they had never witnessed seize her voice.

“I don't care what you have to do, but you will find a solution to this. You have exactly 24 hours to get those leaches out of my womb, if you don't, you won't like the consequences. Consider yourselves warned.”

For the first time she saw doubt creep into their eyes, fear too, when the last thing they saw before she flashed away was a smirk so cruel, they were reminded of the ancient magic that changed her nature so many years ago. That transformed her from a puny, weak and insecure girl into a bloodthirsty creature of the night.

And yet, they hadn’t heeded her advice. (She should not have been surprised really, how many times has that happened?) A full day and a half an hour later Caroline stood in the middle of a pool of blood, hers, theirs, she didn't really know anymore, nor did she really care. 

There were definitively some perks to getting rid of those pesky little things they called emotions.

Bonnie was unconscious, only a small inconvenience. She had tried to hug her thinking it would mollify her, that she was the simpleton they all thought of her, and she was hit on the head for her stupidity. Objectively, a rather small punishment considering the offense.

Alaric would soon die if they didn't give him some vampire blood, having a missing kidney and perforated lung were not good omens to his potential survival. His whimpers and the sound of his labored breathing were music to her ears, too many times has he slighted her without any repercussion. (Hello! High school? Torture, anybody?)

Stefan was bound in vervain soaked ropes she had prepared beforehand. A sort of filet she threw at him with magically weighted stones keeping him on the ground, groaning helplessly under the gag tied around his head, watching his brother laying down next to him, a few fingers missing, his neck and spine broken and feet crushed. Caroline had to admit, for such a newbie in terms of torture, she did pretty good.

“I warned you, Stefan, that you wouldn't like what I had planned, and yet you didn't believe me, did you? You thought I wouldn't know that not any one of you took me seriously? That you could just do nothing and voilà! The problem would solve itself? That I, Caroline Forbes, would give up? Shouldn’t you have known better? I thought you were a little smarter than that… what a disappointment.” she tutted.

“Mhmmm mm mmmh!” came out of his mouth and Caroline grinned satisfied with his frustration.

“Little Stefie wanna talkie?” she mocked. “Sure thing, Care-bear will come to the rescue. As usual.”

She took the gag off, and immediately wished she hadn't, it was so much more peaceful without his whining.

“What the fuck Caroline?! Why would you do all this?!” she could only roll her eyes to the back of her skull when faced with such idiocy.

“Why, Stefan? As I have already said, I warned you. I told you to find a solution, you deliberately didn't even try to search for one. Now, you reap what you sow.”

“But why would you even wish to punish us?! Shouldn't you be happy to help? That's what you enjoy the most on this world!”

“Really?” her brow arched sarcastically by itself.

“Yes!” He seemed quite convinced of his words. “I know you Care, you live to help others! Help us with this situation too! Aren't you glad to have what every vampire mourns the most after turning: the possibility to have children? Think of all the possibilities! The things you will teach them! You would have someone to dote on, someone to dress, or even put make-up on if they’re girls... Aren’t you excited by the prospect of finding names, holding them to your breast, nurturing little persons?! You should feel thankful, honored to be the mother of two miracles Caroline, not make a scene!”

She almost puked right there.

“Had I even been capable of feeling anything right now, honor and gratitude certainly would not be at the top of the list Salvatore. And your attempts at manipulation are neither smart nor welcome.” she countered back matter-of-factly.

Her words irritated him. Her stoicism irked him up further.

“You ungrateful bitch! Why don't you just shut the fuck up like every other fucking time and be “good vampire Caroline” huh? Isn’t that your greatest pride? Don’t you have a speech about doing the good thing in this particular situation?” He paused a moment, and then carried on,his tone cocky and mocking. “Anyway, you have to bear it and carry the pregnancy to full term since you have neither a witch, nor the spell to transfer the babies to someone else, so quit with the tantrum while you still can, Caroline!”

“Or what Stefan? You'll punish me? You seem to forget the situation you are in, dear. “Good vampire Caroline” as you say, was a choice. I chose to be human, good, and loyal. And you never showed the tiniest bit of gratefulness. You never gave back your kindness in return. This is just the last straw. The last pebble causing the landslide. You brought the true Caroline out, Stefan, so now you have to bear the consequences… Still, you should be grateful, I'm going to let you live, I know that if I don't, when I get my emotions back I'll feel guilty for a bit of time, and I don't want to waste any of my time on you anymore.”

He tried to interrupt her, but she didn’t let him.

“Plus, it will give you a chance to stew a little bit. Shouldn’t you wonder how Klaus, you know, my last love, the Original Hybrid, will react when he learns about this little plan you had for me? And please, don’t act even dumber than you are, he has spies everywhere.”

He blanched. She grinned.

Caroline turned her back on him and walked to the small side table where she deposited earlier her handbag. She opened it and took the glinting serrated knife her father had gifted her for her fifteenth birthday. She almost felt guilty for not using this baby as much as it deserved.

Going back towards Stefan, she saw for the first time realization sink into his eyes.

She crouched down next to him and slowly brushed his skin with her weapon, painting with oozing appealing red. Quite fitting for a vampire. Klaus would be proud.

“Now, Stefan, I want you to remember what will happen very soon until the end of your days. Every action has consequences. Every betrayal repercussions. Today you lost a best, and most loyal, friend with your dumb actions. Oh, and Stefan, quick tip, it's not the 19th century anymore, you don't have any right on a woman's body without her consent... Actually, maybe it's just a Salvatore problem, which reminds me…”

Still on her knees, she just turned a few degrees right, and her hands took hold of Damon's jeans and tore them down. Stefan stared at her, winded, sputtering without any clear words getting out of his mouth, as she grabbed with her bare hands his brother's balls and tore them out of their original place on his body.

Caroline stood up and carelessly threw them down next to her rapist's head. The little sack bounced a little, like a dog's chew toy, and the image made her chuckle sadistically.

“He had it coming for a long time, didn't he?” she smiled down evilly at the other Salvatore.

She picked up her Dad's present she had previously put on the ground, and without any warning impaled herself with it in the lower part of the stomach. Deeply. Almost entirely through her width. She went left to right slowly but surely.

“CAROLINE! NO, DON'T! STOP! STOP!!!”

And as Stefan screeched and vainly tried to get out of his woven poisoned prison, Caroline plunged her hand in her bowels, taunted him by playing, jiggling her organs and finally grabbed the upper part of the uterus where the parasites were put against her will in her body, tore it out of her and smacked it forcefully down on the ground. 

She reveled in watching it explode in bloody fragments right in between Stefan and Alaric, putting to an eternal end the development of the future Gemini witches and the illusions the gang had about her.

Tears were silently coursing down her ex-best friend’s face as she calmly took Damon's discarded jeans to clean her red painted hands up.

She was only glad that she was smart and switched her emotions off, the physical pain would have been quite horrible she mused passingly.

“Adieu, Stefan. May we never meet again. For your sake.”

Klaus grumbled as he heard for the umpteenth time some idiot knocking on his front door.  He hoped for their sakes that the guards had a good reason for letting a stranger onto his domain. Or their heads will roll along with the unwanted visitor's.

He reached the door just as the smell of vampire blood reached his nose.

The Original opened the door abruptly and stood gobsmacked for a few instants, admiring the welcome surprise of Caroline standing on his porch, bloodied from head to toe, face composed and luggage at her feet.

Before he even had the time to say anything, she cut him off.

“Glad to see you're alive, I could have guessed otherwise with the amount of time it took you to get to the fucking door. Just so you know, I'm currently switched off, but I'll take a long bubble-filled oil bath and switch it back. FYI, be prepared, you'll have quite the mess to deal with for a few days.”

Even through the worry as to what led her to his door bloodied and without humanity, Klaus couldn't suppress a small smile from etching itself onto his lips. Only his sweet Caroline…

“Love…”

Again, she cut him off. He would have killed anyone else for that, but, well, she was Caroline Forbes, so she could do anything.

“Oh and if you have a current flavor of the month I suggest you get rid of it quickly, or else I will, and as you see, I can be a ruthless Queen, so it won’t be pretty. Tell them to go fuck themselves from now on, 'cause forever has just knocked on your fucking door.”

And she barged in, taking possession of the place, and Klaus could only feel satisfaction (dare he say happiness?) and excitement to see her take what has always been hers.