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havethetimeofyourstyles · 4 years ago

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Chapter One.

a/n: welcome to the first chapter of wtsgd! i’m so excited for you all to read this story and for what’s to come. please please please support content creators bc we’re doing this for free and it takes up a lot of energy to put out stories. so reblog, leave feedback, and send a message to motivate and support them. happy reading everyone <3

SERIES MASTERLIST | word count: 6.4k

come talk to me about wtsgd! i’d love to know your thoughts!

March 4, 2017

The trunk was filled with heavy boxes that were labeled with thick black sharpie, which didn’t seem to leave Luciana’s senses; and one too many suitcases filled with her many articles of clothing that she couldn’t get rid of—no matter how hard she tried—since she was too much of a hoarder and every piece of clothing seemed to have a lost memory in them that she tried very hard to think of, which only meant that it was worth keeping.

A droplet of sweat leaked down the side of her face due to her nonstop packing and heavy-lifting from her childhood room upstairs to her dad’s car in the driveway. It didn’t help that the sun was beaming down at her with every move like she was on center stage, in front of the spotlight, but it made much more sense for the sun to do that because that’s where she belonged: on stage.

Moving to Brooklyn, New York from Cambridge, Massachusetts during, what felt like, the coldest but the sunniest day of March wasn’t the smartest move—to be fair, Luciana was never one to make a smart move, anyways—but it was one that needed to be done. Plus, all the lifting seemed to have warmed her up.

Her destination, or now, home, in New York was one that she’d been anticipating for a while now. She had auditioned for the role as Kim in Miss Saigon on Broadway in November, and she’d gotten a callback in January for the role as the second Kim, meaning she would be on rotation to perform every week or two weeks, so the main Kim could rest. But she would still have to go to rehearsals and be on the side of the stage watching the show just in case she needed to jump in at the last minute.

It wasn’t her ideal way of playing the main lead, but nonetheless, she was grateful for the opportunity, and she would take any chance that was thrown at her to not only take another step towards her dream, but also another learning opportunity to make her a better actress.

Little Luci would’ve been so proud of the present Luci because it’d been her dream ever since she was younger, to be on stage and eventually, be on the big screen. Although she was far from completing her dream of being a face in Hollywood, this was a step that would take her to where she wanted to be in the future, and for that, she was proud of herself.

As a child, Luci had been in various commercials; from being the kid that played with slime and had no lines but to just put on a big smile while the sticky substance ran through her small hands, to being the daughter in a car commercial with one line that said “Are we there yet?” with a groan and a face of exhaustion as if she were the one driving the car. She hoped that these commercials would have someone recognize her talent, to cast her as a Disney star, but that would require moving to California, which her parents were wary of.

The commercials stopped when she reached middle school. Her early adolescent years consisted of an abundance of attitude and mood swings; Luci was a very tough and determined kid. Her love for acting had grown into a big balloon that was let go and on its way into the galaxy where no one could reach it—where no one could mess with her achieving her dream.

She would always stand in front of her white wooden framed mirror—with delicately painted colorful flowers around the border—reciting lines that she heard from a television series or the films that she watched, and she would write them down in her blue notebook. Sometimes, her parents would let her search the script up if it was available online. But oftentimes, she would test and challenge her memorization, and listen to it by ear; testing her mind, and eventually, her memorization skills were immaculate by the age of eleven.

It was perfect timing because by the time she was in middle school, she was able to snatch the roles she wanted when her school’s drama department held school plays. Her family thought that she would start to hate being on stage since school plays always ran until late evening, but being part of the productions had only enhanced her love for her talent, and it only prepared her for a quarter of what her future may look like.

All in all, from a very young age, she always knew that she wanted to become an actress. The spotlight or the center of the camera was where she always craved to be.

And she was finally making that dream come true.

A black Toyota Camry pulled into the space behind the car that was filled with her belongings. Ren and Beatrice, Luci’s lovely parents, both get out of the car with a pink box of donuts—a snack for the road and for when she gets to her new apartment.

“Ready, Lucky?” Beatrice asked, rubbing her daughter’s back. She was quite bummed to see Luci leave her childhood home, but she’s proud to see Lucky Luci chase her dreams. She was, after all, twenty-five and was bound to move out at some point, but to see it actually happen made Beatrice quite emotional.

“Ma, please, don’t cry…” Luci frowned as Beatrice pressed her fingertips to the corners of her eyes. She wrapped her arm around her mother’s shoulder, comforting her. “You’re all coming to New York in a month, right? To watch me on stage?” Luci asked, reassuring herself that she would see her family in a different state to rescue her from her loneliness.

Luci was an independent woman. She could do tasks by herself, go places alone, and she wouldn’t have a problem with it; she enjoyed the company of herself. But to know that at some point she might be alone—that everyone had left her behind or forgotten about her—was what scared her. She needed to know that the people who loved her unconditionally wouldn’t forget about her.

“Of course we’re going!” Ren exclaimed with a smile that Luci was going to miss seeing everyday. “We can’t miss our baby on the Broadway stage. If we could, we’d go to every damn show that you’re in, but that would be a lot of gas, no?”

She chuckled, nodding her head. She felt tears pricking her eyes at how supportive her parents were—they’ve always been. If she could, she would take them with her to New York, but her one bedroom apartment and their work said otherwise.

“Now, Lucky, don’t cry.” It was Beatrice’s turn to comfort her daughter. Like any parent, when they see their child cry, it breaks their heart and they cry too. “We’re gonna see you real soon. You can always come back anytime you want. We’re just a phone call away and we’ll pick you up,” Beatrice said between sniffles. The mother and daughter were embracing so tenderly and comfortingly—enjoying every last moment together until they got to see each other again.

“Jeez, you’re both the same—always crying!” Ren interrupted, making the two women laugh; and he was glad they found what he said amusing because he couldn’t handle the sad moment. “C’mon here, my Lulu.” Luci settled into her father’s arms, hugging him tightly. She’s always been her dad’s girl, despite having a close relationship with her mother, her relationship with her father was something that felt like home; he always knew what to say and when to say it. It helped that she was the female version of him. “You’re gonna be the best star out there, I’m sure of it. Now, I want you to have fun, alright? The fame, the fortune, the big city…it doesn’t amount to anything if you’re not having the time of your life” He comfortingly rubbed Luci’s back, holding her in a warm and tight squeeze.

Luci smiled at her father’s words. She was always a bit hard on herself when she would mess up or forget a line or a movement that correlates to a specific line in her script. When she was younger, she would beat herself up for a sliver of a moment; she would cry into her pillow—sobs loud enough that they were heard from downstairs. Luci would think that she wouldn’t become a well-known actress just because of the minor forgetfulness her mind had presented. But Ren would gently tap on her ocean blue door, letting himself in because he knew his daughter didn’t have the energy to get up and let him in, and he would sit beside her, gently urging her to sit up with him. Once she complied, after many groans of refusals, she would be glad she did because her father looked deeply into her eyes—and it was like looking into the reflection of clear and clean water—and told her she was a star. It was only three words, but those three words reminded her to never give up and get up when she would hit the pavement of what she felt like were her fallen hopes and dreams.

Ren would then end it with a statement of advice that had always lingered in her mind, resonating to the silent and harshful words that she tells herself. ‘Nothing will amount to anything if you’re not having the time of your life.’

A rush of gratitude settled upon her as her eyes became glossier by the seconds she was in Ren’s arms. Beatrice looked at her greatest treasures fondly, a smile appeared on her face only for it to be replaced by a look of confusion.

“Where is that damn brother of yours? He said he was going to be here at ten!” Beatrice interrupted the sweet moment she was having with her father, making them disconnect from the hug—just as Ren did with Luci and Beatrice.

Speaking of the devil, her dear brother was making his way towards home on the side of the street, wearing a grey sweatshirt that was stained with his sweat as his earphones were nestled in his ears, loudly playing music. He loudly sang along to some rap song, breath staggered as he rapped along with his hands.

Nathan smiled once he stepped foot onto the driveway as he took out his earphones, seeing his family look at him vigilantly. Luci laughed, shaking her head.

“Hey, there’s our superstar, little Ana!” Nathan opened his arms, ready to hug you but she quickly stopped him, curving her spine backwards to deny his hug. Ana had been one of the many nicknames her family had called her when she was growing up from the second half of her name, but Ana seemed to have stuck with Nathan as no one else really called her that, so it was his own personal nickname for her.

“Ew, please, do not hug me.” Her face wrinkled in disgust from the spell of her brother’s sweat from his run. Nathan chuckled, playfully rolling his eyes before turning towards his parents.

“Ooh, donuts-”

Beatrice slapped the back of his hand before he even got a chance to open the pink donut box. “Not until you shower and change. Lulu needs to be in Brooklyn by three!”

“Ow, mother!” Nathan whipped his hand away from Beatrice’s burning slap, although he was just playing around and being dramatic. “But fine, alright. The star always gets what she wants, am I right?” He dropped his head towards Luci, sighing before he hurried inside the house to take a quick shower and change.

Luci giggled, telling her parents that she would be right back to go up to her room to check if she’d gotten everything, even though she knew that she had everything, she just needed to reminisce alone for a moment.

Her feet took her up the wooden stairs, where she, for some unknown reason, always spent her time sitting on as she leaned her back against the wall and read or drew. Nathan always found it weird of her when they were doing homework when they were younger, but it was just one of the many fun anecdotes he could tell reporters if he’s asked about their childhood.

Pushing open her ocean blue door that she never changed because she loved the color, she was met with the emptiness of what was once her sanctuary. Despite the paint on the wall changing, the replacement of furniture, and rearrangement of her childhood room, Luci could still see the baby pink walls where she hung up various posters of her celebrity crushes when she was eight. She could still see herself walking over to her Cinderella white wooden dresser as she pulled out an inflatable microphone from her drawer before she walked over to her bed to sing her heart out with her cousin. In the corner of her room was her mirror that she painted colorful flowers along the border when she was younger, and she definitely did not want to change or get rid of it; it wasn’t difficult to stir up a memory when she was in front of that mirror because up until now, she was always reciting her lines to her own reflection until the late night.

All of these memories that Luci held within her heart would help her ground herself—remind her where she came from. No matter where her career took her, she would always be the girl that was firstly known in her room, crying, laughing, and acting within the four baby pink walls until she was sixteen, and then it changed to an ecru white. The feeling of nostalgia clutched her chest, and for the second time today—not even noon, yet—she found herself crying.

She silently sobbed in her sanctuary. Her chest felt tight, like her heart was grasping onto the memories, begging her to not leave, to not move on. But moving on would mean being stuck, and she didn’t want to feel stuck—she just never wanted to be in one place where the walls would slowly feel like they were closing in on her. She didn’t want to be in one place and eventually hated it, so for that, she had to move on.

A soft knock was heard from the outside of her bedroom, making Luci turn around hastily. She found Beatrice standing in the doorway, warmly smiling at her daughter, and keeping the tears at bay because she needed the comfort of her mother more than her mother’s tears.

“My Lucky Star…” Beatrice walked into the room, welcoming Luci into her arms. “You okay?”

Luci deeply inhaled and exhaled as she calmed herself down from her cries. “I’m alright. It’s just hard saying goodbye to this place—to my room.”’

“Oh, Lulu. You don’t need to say goodbye. I know you’ll be coming back here soon, anyways. I know you love home too much to completely stay away.” Beatrice was subtly trying to remind Luci about her love for her hometown, for her home, but her words also were trying to remind her about that certain love for her home and to never forget that love so she doesn’t stray away because Beatrice was simply afraid Luci would never want to come back once she discovered the luxury of her career. And even though she knew her Lulu wasn’t one to forget about her family, Beatrice would never admit her fear.

Luci sniffled, wiping her tears away as she pulled away from her mother’s embrace. “Yeah, I know. Just…doesn’t feel real that I’m leaving.”

“Sure, you’re leaving, but you’re going off to do bigger and better things. You were never one to stay in one place, physically and mentally—you were always moving, always loved learning more. And I’ve always been so intrigued and interested in how your mind works.”

“Ma…” The waterworks seemed to be the highlight of the move.

“I’m serious! I’m so genuinely proud of you. You’ve been keeping your talent—and I don’t mean ‘high school plays’ talent. I mean your Broadway, Hollywood, Academy winning talent. Now, you get to showcase your light in front of thousands of people.” Beatrice always had a way of boosting Luci’s self-esteem, making her ego a tad bit more bigger than it already was. She didn’t mind if her self-esteem had skyrocketed into the galaxy of her dreams, but she always reminded Luci that being humble and kind always outweighed being obnoxious and arrogant. “Now, enough with these tears. You’ve got a road trip to New York. C’mon, now.”

They made their way downstairs and out the door where Ren and Nathan were talking about the latest basketball game of the Celtics. The trunk was closed, and the only thing waiting was Luci herself.

“There she is! Ready?”

Luci took a deep breath, turning her head to look back at the pastel yellow house that had kept her safe for the past twenty-five years. From here, she knew everything was going to change. Whether it’d be for the good or if things would go downhill from here? She didn’t know; all she knew was that she was going to be doing what she loved and she was going to have the time of her life doing it.

“Yeah, I’m ready.”

The state of Connecticut seemed to pass by quickly from the car as Nathan drove at a decent seventy miles per hour; the state vanished just as quickly as when they entered.

Luci mindlessly looked out the window, thinking about everything and nothing at once as she drowned out the music playing through the speakers of the car and Nathan’s voice singing along.

The cars passing by, the bystanders, and the locals filled the streets and highways, making her wonder what all of these people’s stories were—wondering if they lived in this city or if they were just stopping by to visit, or if they’re just going through the state to get to the one next door just as she was. Maybe she’s had an encounter or simply passed by them on the street in a world that seemed too large but small at the same time. She always pondered on whether everyone else thought the way she thought—if they wondered what her story was or the people around them.

The world is an interesting place and there were so many intriguing people out there, making her more excited by the minute as she takes on this new adventure in her life that would be completely life changing. Luci’s going to be meeting so many new people that, she would hope, have an impact on her personal life or career.

“Nervous?” Nathan broke the comfortable silence between them.

Luci raised her brows and curled her lips into her mouth. “A bit.”

He nodded, thinking for a moment. Nathan was always one to think before he spoke, and it was a quality that some people needed to learn how to do. He quickly learned that lesson when he was in high school; one of his friends, Johnny, and him were going back and forth joking around with one another. And for some odd reason, teenage boys liked to joke around about fucking everything, so Nathan had said “Yeah, I fucked your mom, what about it?” without thinking. Johnny stayed silent, the rest of their friends were waiting for his comeback, but they only received tears that glossed over his eyes before he ran off to a different part of campus, away from the lunch tables. Nathan found him behind the orchestra building with his face pressed on his kneecaps, crying. Later, he found out that Johnny’s mother had passed away before their sophomore year started and he hadn’t told anyone, which left Nathan quite speechless, but it was a lesson that he learned: to think before anything comes out of his mouth.

“I know you’ll do great. You were born to do this, born to be on stage. Everything you do is to greater your experience and opportunities. All the mistakes you’re gonna make, which we both know you’re gonna make, they’re gonna be learning lessons for you to continue doing what you’re good at doing; the mistakes are there so you can better yourself,” he reassured, occasionally glancing at you briefly before averting his eyes back onto the highway.

Luci smiled, never taking her eyes off her older brother. She leaned closer to the middle console, where his right arm was resting on the padded console. Hugging his arm tightly and resting her cheek on his shoulder, she accepted and appreciated his advice, his words. They made her heart fill up with so much gratitude and love, insanely grateful and happy that she had such an amazing and supportive family who always knew the right things to say when they could sense her nerves and anxieties powering through the roof.

“You’re gonna kill it out there. This is just a step towards where you wanna go, where you actually wanna be.”

She nodded, looking to her right as they quickly passed the ‘Welcome to New York’ sign from the state line of Connecticut and New York, and it was the sign indicating her new home.

Nathan pulled into the apartment’s parking garage, entering in with the code that the complex gave Luci on the silver keypad as the two watched the automatic gate arm swing up to the side, and Nathan entered the parking structure, parking in one of the many spaces available.

Luci excitedly got out of the car, rushing to the trunk where Nathan had opened it from inside the car. Unfortunately, she had forgotten to bring the hand dolly to help carry the boxes, which meant that the siblings were going to have to carry the many boxes she packed by her own hand and strength. But luckily, some of them weren’t that heavy; most of the items in the brown boxes were kitchenware and she figured she could just drag those.

One by one, they took one box each and headed for the elevator, where it took them to her apartment floor—floor four. Luci grabbed the keys from her purse that contained two copper keys hanging on one single silver loop and a small keyless sensor, and she unlocked her navy blue door, revealing her new apartment.

When she entered, she was met with a door across the entrance that she would use for her coats and shoes, things that she would need when she’s rushing out the door. Going through the small hallway in from the entrance, it led her to another small hallway to her left where her bedroom and guest bathroom was; and to her right, it would take her to the kitchen and living space. With four big windows with black window frames, the natural light really came in, making her place brighter for saving electricity.

Walking in and putting the boxes against the black cabinets in the kitchen, she immediately fell in love with the space, her space. Despite already taking a tour of the apartment a few months prior to her official move in day, it felt different being there for the second time because she now knew that this place was hers. She saw it in a different light, and she was already anticipating the memories she was going to make in her new home. The place was empty; and with every step and every noise from her mouth, the room would echo, and she loved it. There was something satisfying about the echo in an empty space that was hers, like she wanted to furnish the hell out of it, but at the same time, she didn’t mind the echo.

“This is your new home.” Nathan put an arm around Luci’s shoulder. He got a bit emotional seeing his baby sister grow up and move away from home, but he was excited for all of the experiences and memories she was going to make. Luci looked up at him, not saying anything but smiling as she was speechless. Nathan could practically feel the excitement run through her and all he did was chuckle at her speechlessness. “C’mon, let’s go get the rest of the boxes.”

For the next fifteen minutes, Luci and Nathan hauled the boxes from the car, to the elevator, and down the hallway to her apartment. There were about four more boxes left in the trunk, and they would’ve been finished by now if they hadn’t been taking breaks.

Nathan’s phone rang as he was sitting on the floor, leaning against the cabinets of the kitchen across from Luci who was sitting in the corner where her dining table would be.

“Hello?” Answered Nathan. “What? Tonight? I’m in New York. I’m helping my little sister move here. Uh, okay. Sure. Bye.” He groaned, standing up.

“Who was that?” Luci asked, nosy as she was.

“That was one of the board members at Mass General Hospital.” Luci’s eyes widened. “They just asked me if I could come in tonight to teach and supervise the new residents.” Nathan was a general doctor working in the Emergency Room as Mass General back in Boston. He’s always wanted to teach with all the knowledge he’s stored in his brain—always wanting someone to learn a thing or two when they spoke to him, and this was his chance.

“Holy shit, that’s amazing, Nate!” Luci stood up, excited for him.

He started to breathe a bit heavily and Luci immediately took notice; she could practically feel the nerves coming out of him, the same nerves she felt while going in for an audition. “Yeah, I actually have to leave, like, right now.”

“Hey, hey.” She quickly stopped him from running out of the building and out of his mind. “Come here—breathe with me for a second.” She held onto his wrists gently.

“Luci, I have to-”

He pulled away, but she tugged him back. “You’re going to drive yourself through the highway, and who knows what will happen, you might get pulled over and you won’t make it to the hospital. So, just take sixty seconds to breathe with me.”

For the remainder of the time that they had together, they took some deep breaths. She spoke encouraging and uplifting words to him to calm down his nerves and anxieties that he seemed to drive himself over a cliff for, and it seemed to work as Nathan’s shoulder’s weren’t so tense and the grip on her hands had loosened.

The two of them walked down to the parking garage where Nathan took down the last four boxes and placed them by the entrance of the complex. He was adamant on helping her get the last few boxes up to her apartment, but she shrugged it off, telling him that she was able to carry them and that he needed to leave because he’s most likely going to hit traffic during rush hour.

“Call me if you need anything, okay? I mean it. I will drive here in a heartbeat.”

“I will, I will-”

“Just not tonight,” he joked. “This is the highlight of my career.” His smile was so bright that it was like he was a little kid on Christmas again who just received a Hot Speed set from Santa.

Luci laughed, hugging him goodbye. “And call me if you need anything too. I’ll miss seeing you everyday,” she admitted, a slight frown on her face. She thought she’d have the entire day with Nathan, but it was cut short due to his work but she wasn’t mad about that at all because she knew there'd be plenty of times when he would drive down to walk along the New York streets and see her perform.

“I’m gonna miss you too, Ana. But I love you and I’ll see you next month!” He hurried into his car, and Luci watched him as he pulled out of the driveway, waving at the rear view mirror to say one last ‘see you later’ to his little sister.

Walking back to the curb where all of the boxes were set, Luci picked one up to test how heavy it was and she barely made it upright without almost hurting her back, so she put the box down to take a proper breather. She decided to drag the box closer to the door of the complex—which saved her a few steps without completely dropping the box that was labeled ‘glass plates’—and pulled the handle of the door, only to find it completely locked. There was a slight panic that flew through her until she realized that she needed her keyless tag that she had to press against the pad on the wall to get inside the complex, so she blew out a sigh of relief before reaching down to her pocket for her key, and with just her luck, her keys weren’t in her pocket or with her at all. Then she started to panic again.

Luci quickly walked out of the parking garage and to the front of the building where the leasing office was to find them closed, which was odd because it was Saturday, but apparently their servers were down so they just decided to take the entire day off. She rolled her eyes annoyingly, walking back to the garage in a fast manner because she didn’t want anyone to take her boxes, and so she figured that she could just wait until someone left the complex or arrived. She even left her phone at her place, so it wasn’t like she could call anyone to help her, but some sort of entertainment would help the time go by quicker.

Sitting on the curb in the garage, pacing back and forth on the sidewalk, and humming the melody from the Miss Saigon soundtrack, an hour goes by until she sees someone walk past the automatic gate barrier, heading towards the entrance where he opened the door with his tag. Luci sprinted towards the door, calling out for help.

“Wait, wait!” The man turned around confusingly, taking his AirPod out of one ear. She caught up, taking deep breaths as she waved at the man. “Sorry, I’ve been out here for an hour and I completely forgot my key.” He didn’t say anything but stared at her, wondering why he’s never seen this woman before. The apartment complex really only had four floors, and he’s sure that he’s seen everyone who’s lived here. She noticed that he looked down at the boxes and back at her. “Oh, I just moved in.” He nodded more understandingly. “Do you mind holding the door for me?”

“Sure.” Was the first thing he told her before stepping aside to hold the door. She took another deep breath, getting into the correct form so she doesn’t throw her back out, and began to lift the heavy box. He noticed her struggling, and he felt foolish for not offering his help in the first place when he noticed the four boxes on the cement. “Here, sorry, let me help with that. Get the door, yeah?” Luci’s heart flipped once she heard his deep, accented voice before she gratefully thanked him and he grabbed the box from her, replacing her hands with his and the slightest brush of their fingers made her flustered; he held the box tightly to his chest without much struggle.

“Yeah, let me just get this one.” Luci grabbed a much lighter box that had all of her shoes, and held the door for him with her foot as he made his way inside of the building and to the elevator. He pressed the button with the arrow pointing up, and luckily, they didn’t have to wait for more than five seconds before the bell at the top chimed and the stainless steel doors opened.

With the heavy box in his hands, he still let Luci walk in first, which made her smile and he followed in as she pressed with the bold ‘4’ printed on it. He held the box in between his chest and the other end of the bar on the wall as they waited in silence as the elevator lifted them up to her apartment floor, and she brushed past him when he lifted his arm, gesturing her to go first.

Her front door was closed but it was unlocked, which only made sense, so she opened her door, putting the box next to the entrance and politely asking the man to put it next to the one you put down.

“Thank you so much, really. You have no idea how much I appreciate your help.”

“It’s no problem. I was the same when I moved here too—forgot my keys and was locked out.” He related to make her feel lighter about the situation since it was an honest mishap.

“Did you go to the leasing office?” She asked curiously.

“Yeah, but they were closed.”

“They’re closed today too! It’s like they do that on purpose whenever someone new moves in.” The man chuckled, scratching the back of his neck.

She hadn’t gotten a proper look at him since she was too distracted by trying to get into her building, but just by one real look at him, he was very attractive—probably too attractive to where she couldn’t think straight. He was wearing a pastel yellow and white striped button down that was a bit flowy and open, showing his white tank underneath that was tucked into his black skinny jeans. His tank top was low enough, exposing a patch of chest hair and his necklace that rested against his skin, in between his swallow tattoos just below his collarbones. Rings hugged his long fingers on both hands as he held two brown paper bags from Trader Joes. He was handsome, that’s for sure, and she felt like she was going to compare his beauty to all the other men that she was going to encounter in the future.

“They’re not very good at going into work, but if you give them a call then it’s like they’re a 24/7 help center.”

Luci nodded, chuckling. “Good to know. I’ll keep that in mind.”

“I’ll help you with the last boxes.” Before she was about to protest and tell him that he didn’t have to help her anymore because she was sure the last ones were light, he made his way towards the elevator and she quickly followed.

To her surprise, one of the boxes was heavier than the other and she was glad that the man was able to carry it for her. They took the boxes up to her apartment, stacking it on top of the ones that were set down before she thanked him gratefully again.

“I really appreciate all your help.” She smiled, leaning against the doorframe.

“Not that I’m doubting your strength or anything, but how were you supposed to get those boxes up to your apartment?” He asked softly, not wanting to offend her by his words.

“Oh, my brother was supposed to help me, but he had to go back home for an emergency at work.” The man nodded, seeming that was the most acceptable answer, not like he was searching if she was lying. “But thank you for your help. You’re a true lifesaver,” she said with a soft smile on her face. Her tone was a bit flirty than she wanted it to be, but it naturally came out.

“It’s not a problem. I’ll see you around.” Luci hadn’t closed her door yet, but she found out that he was literally her neighbor on the opposite side of the wall. He didn’t even have to take two steps to get to his place—all he had to do was turn around and he was home. She smiled at the thought of that, glad that her neighbor was already so kind to her.

As he was fumbling with his keys, he eventually got his door unlocked, and Luci was itching to ask what his name was—maybe make her first friend during her first day living in the big city. The man felt his neighbor's eyes on him, burning through the back of his head, so he turned around at the same time she spoke.

“Uh, hey,” Luci called out. He was looking over his shoulder, pursing his lips as he raised his brows. “I was wondering if…you’d like to have dinner with me tonight? Y’know, to thank you for all your help and practically saving me while I was stranded.” She chuckled, playing with the tips of her fingers as she looked at him with hope.

He thought the invitation was nice, but…“It’s okay, really. I, uh, have plans already tonight,” he admitted honestly because he doesn’t make a habit of being dishonest.

Luci had some thick skin—she grew it throughout the years, and she had always been pretty confident. So many people would think that she could handle rejection well because she’s auditioned for many roles in her lifetime, and had been rejected for most of those roles. But the rejection that her neighbor handed to her so respectfully and politely was one that hit her the most, and she didn't know why.

Curling her lips into her mouth as she felt the pang of her heart sinking into her chest, she nodded and placed a small smile onto her face.

“Have fun tonight, then. I’ll see you around.” She grinned, hiding the slight bit of pain that she felt. He nodded, walking inside his apartment as she was in her doorway as well. “Oh, I’m Luci, by the way.” She introduced herself, feeling like she should have done that ten minutes ago, but it had slipped her mind.

The corner of the man’s mouth turned up into a sly smirk, and she nearly felt herself fall as she gripped the door handle tightly. It was enough to make the pain in her chest disappear, and all thoughts of the rejection that she would think about for the rest of the night vanished.

“Nice to meet you, Luci. I’m Harry.”

With that, Harry closed his door, putting a barrier between him and Luci, who was still standing in her doorway. She let out the longest sigh of her life, feeling like she’d been constricting herself from breathing properly for the last ten minutes.

Luci closed her door and leaned against it, looking down at the boxes that were resting by her feet. She softly smiled, her cheeks were starting to get warm, and she was fully aware that Harry was the cause of it.

come talk to me about your thoughts and feelings! hope you all enjoyed the first chapter, thank you for reading <3

ty to @sunflowers-styles for beta reading!

#harry styles fanfiction #harry styles angst #harry styles series #harry styles x oc #harry styles fic #harry styles ff #harry styles smut #harry styles fluff #harry styles au #boyfriend!harry #harry styles writing #harry styles solo #actress!oc

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hunflowers · 5 years ago

Text

Skating Lessons

Word Count: 15k

Requested? Nope, but you always can here :)

Mood board

A/N: She is here! She was a doozy to write but I love her so much and I hope you do too <3 Enjoy babydaddy!Harry, and if you do (or if you don’t) throw some feedback my way, really helps a girl out y’know. *nose boops*

“Y/N!”

It was the voice she hated hearing. The voice she despised. The voice that brought her stress more than anything else in her life.

The voice of her landlord. Old Man Chris as she likes to call him. He was the typical stingy, grumpy old man that owned a small little apartment and hardly gave the young girl room to breathe when it came to rent money.

She always gave her money, albeit sometimes a day or two late, but that didn’t change the fact that she still gave him his expected money. This time was a little different however, seeing how she was already a week late, and at this rate going on to be two weeks late.

But, she was so close to giving him the money, plus a little extra to hold her over for next month. All Y/N needed was a few more days. Money had been very tight this past month for reasons she’d rather not discuss with Chris, and she knows she’s in the wrong, but she will get him that money.

Flipping onto her stomach in bed, Y/N holds her pillow over her head to try and drown out the incessant pounding on her front door. It was most likely just past seven in the morning, and Y/N had a very long day yesterday, so all she wanted to do was sleep away her worries for just a little while longer. Clearly, Old Man Chris had different intentions.

Y/N let out a very guttural groan as she threw off her blanket, slid her feet into her fluffy slippers, and wrapped her robe around her body before stomping to the door with a faux smile plastered across her face.

“Morning Chris,” she chirped, looking eye to eye with the man who looked like he was ready to stab her. Although he seemed like a miserable old man, he wasn’t always so bad. When the two met, Y/N was in a much darker place than she is now. Chris has children of his own so when he saw how desperate she was for help, his heart yearned for her.

It was a love-hate relationship the two shared.

“Is there something I can do for you, so early in the morning?”

He gave Y/N that knowing look that she had seen every month that she’s lived here. The look that said you know why I’m here, now hand it over. And in return, every time, she gave him that sheepish smile.

“Y/N, I can’t let this go on any further.”

“Chris, please, you don’t understand. I promise just a few more days,” she begged, clasping her hands together and bringing them up to her chin. He sighed, shaking his head and placing his hands on his hips as he looked down to the floor. She had a soft spot in his heart, so it was always so difficult for him to put his foot down, but he couldn’t let this go on any further.

He looked back up at her, noticing the way she pouted her bottom lip just like how his daughter does when she wants something. It’s hard for him to say no. “You have until Sunday, Y/N. I mean it. I can’t accept this anymore. Don’t pay your rent on the fifteenth, and I’m kicking you out.”

Y/N nodded her head graciously, not knowing whether or not to hug her landlord. He wasn’t too keen on human contact so she just gave him her brightest smile as he walked back down the stairs that led to her apartment.

It was Thursday, meaning she had two days plus the rest of today to gather up as much money as possible. One of her jobs pays tomorrow, and despite other bills she has to take out of that money, she should still have enough to get her that rent money.

Closing the door behind her, Y/N looked around at her apartment, taking in a deep breath and deciding to make herself some coffee since there was no chance she was going to be able to fall back asleep. Not that she had the choice to anyway, because she had to get downstairs as soon as possible if she wanted to keep her apartment.

By the time she managed to get the tiredness out of her system, it was a little past eight-thirty. Y/N locked her door behind her, hurriedly running downstairs and to her day job.

From nine to six, Y/N ran her ice skating lessons down at the local ice rink. And although there weren’t a lot of people that came to her for lessons, by the time six o’clock rolls around, Y/N is beyond exhausted.

But then seven comes, and she’s running to her night job as a waitress to one of the more popular restaurants in town. And by more popular, it’s a nonstop rotating door of people walking inside until it closes at midnight. But, even though it closes at midnight, that doesn’t stop the people already inside from taking their sweet time in leaving. Last night, the last group of people left at one-thirty, and they didn’t even leave a good tip. She survives off minimum wage there, and even though she’s been working there for nearly a year, a raise was out of the question. The owners hardly ever pay more than what they’re supposed to. But they’re the only ones who’ve given her a job and at this point, she had no choice but to stay.

Ann and her daughter Olivia were the first to stroll in once it was nine in the morning. They always book the first slots every Tuesday and Thursday because they both claimed to be early birds. And it was good for them, because being the first ones means they get Y/N when she’s not completely wiped out.

“Good morning, Y/N,” Olivia said happily, running up to her skate teacher and giving her a big hug. Olivia had just turned six last Thursday, and she was the most exuberant six year old Y/N had ever met. She gets it from Ann, because like Olivia, Ann always seemed to have a smile on her face.

Returning the hug, Y/N squeezed the little girl, standing up and twirling her around before placing her back down onto her tiny feet. “Good morning, Livie! Let’s get started shall we?”

❊ ❊

It was almost five, and no one had booked a lesson within the last hour. Usually after school gets a bit busier, but of course, when Y/N really needs it to get busy, it doesn’t, leaving her to sulk around for an hour as she thinks of what she has to cut from her budget for the upcoming months.

As the sun sets, Y/N decides to cut time early, to give herself that extra ten minutes to herself in bed before she heads off to her second job. When she sits on a bench to unlace her skates, she hears the door to the rink open. Turning around to see whoever walked in, for a split second, the breath is taken out of Y/N’s lungs as she sees the most handsome man standing before her and the small girl clinging to his leg.

But, just for a split second.

Gaining her composure, Y/N puts on her best smile as they made eye contact, yanking the skate off her foot. “Are you Y/N?”

A little taken aback by the question, since she didn’t expect this fine man to be there for her, she could only nod her head in response. “Great! I was uh – wondering if I could sign my daughter up for lessons?”

Y/N looked at the little girl, noticing the shyness as she stood mostly behind her father. She had cute, big brown eyes that matched her dark brown hair. She had a bit of pudge to her rosy cheeks and it took everything in Y/N to not reach down and give them a pinch.

Y/N was a sucker for children. Well, other people’s children. She wasn’t so sure she wanted any herself. Too many things were bound to go wrong if she had a child of her own and she’d rather not give that human being a fucked up life like her own if she had any say in the matter.

“Uh, yeah, of course! I always love teaching someone new. Especially if they’re as cute as her,” she gushed, making the little girl’s cheeks redden even more, and a small smile wormed its way onto her lips. Y/N took notice of the girl’s missing front tooth.

“Well,” the man looked down to his daughter, a smile of his own on his face as he reached down and picked her up into his arms, “that’s great news! Isn’t it, Abby?”

Abby nodded her head quickly but then soon stuck her head into the crevice between her father’s neck and shoulder, looking away from the woman. Soon, with enough of Y/N’s charm, Abby won’t be too shy to even look at her. That’ll be one of Y/N’s missions, as well as teaching her how to ice skate.

“I’m Harry,” the man stated when he realized he hadn’t introduced himself properly yet. He stuck out his hand, waiting for Y/N to grasp it in a friendly shake.

“Y/N. Do you want to sign her up for private lessons? Or group ones? Or both?”

Then they worked out the logistics of when Abby was going to come in for her lessons, the answer being at noon every Monday, Wednesday for her private lessons, and Saturday with a group around her same beginner level.

When everything was settled, including the pricing for the private and group lessons, Y/N took notice of the time and that twenty minutes had passed. She cursed herself mentally, because instead of gaining an extra ten minutes of rest, she now lost ten. She lost time as her and Harry made small conversation over Abby’s sudden need to figure skate and how they had to go searching immediately. The entire time Abby stayed quiet though, hardly lifting her head from her father’s shoulder.

When Y/N escorted the pair out of the rink, Abby quickly glanced at her before ducking her head back out of sight. For some reason, Y/N found the little girl very interesting - not to mention adorable - so she couldn’t wait for Saturday to see her again and hopefully work the girl into warming up to her. Also wouldn’t mind seeing her father again. Although, Y/N did have this lingering thought in the back of her mind that he surely was off limits, because he has a daughter who has a mother, and that mother is probably his wife or fiancee or girlfriend, whatever the case may be. But, Y/N did take notice that he wasn’t wearing a wedding band. Again, not that that means anything, because he could have a girlfriend, or maybe he forgot to put it on today.

So, Y/N pushed all intimate thoughts to the back of her mind because she deemed it useless, and didn’t want to get her hopes up.

Plus, she had a lot bigger, more pressing issues to think about.

When they finally started to separate, their small talk diminishing, a new voice spoke up for the first time that evening. “Daddy?”

Harry quickly looked to his daughter who squeaked out the soft call, raising his eyebrows in surprise, not expecting her to say anything in front of the stranger. “Yes, baby?”

“We get food now?”

Even her voice had Y/N swooning and wanting to coo at the girl. Abby was just that cute.

Then they officially parted ways, not before Harry spoke the words We’ll see you Saturday that had Y/N’s heart pick up pace for whatever reason. We’ll see you Saturday. We’ll see you.

We’ll.

Y/N can’t remember the last time something so trivial made her happy to see the next day. It was stupid, honestly, because why would something so small from someone so irrelevant in her life, make her this excited?

Only time would tell.

And clearly it made a bigger impact on her than she had intended. Because the moment she stepped into her restaurant for the night, her coworker, Kelly, who she likes to think of as her closest friend, immediately picked up on her brighter mood. Y/N was questioned without hesitation, because ever since Kelly met Y/N, she couldn’t help but feel bad for her because Y/N was always on the quieter side, keeping to herself and finding it difficult to open herself up to anyone who was interested. It was rare finding a genuine smile on her face, and so the fact she walked in actually happy something must’ve happened.

Y/N clearly denied because nothing did happen. All that happened was she met an extremely good looking dad with an adorable daughter and she was probably going to keep seeing them for at least a little while. It was just nice having something to look forward to lately.

“Make a move then!” Kelly continued on with their last conversation that had been interrupted.

Y/N rolled her eyes at the statement, finishing up making the bill for her last table. “That’s not gonna happen.”

“And why not?”

“He has a daughter which means there’s a mother who could be his wife or fiancée or girlfriend,” she stresses, turning to her friend with a bored look.

Kelly scoffed, “Or she’s not in the picture. Won’t know until you try.”

“Or I could save myself the embarrassment.”

“You’re the most stubborn person I’ve ever met, y’know that?”

Y/N shrugs, her chin turning towards her shoulder in a mocking manner as if to say she’s proud to hold that title. She was being stubborn but for good reason. She didn’t feel this need to want to make a move and in the end she knew nothing good would come out of it because that tended to be her luck, so she was protecting herself and saving herself from any unwarranted feelings and such.

And the idea of Harry made her sad the more she thought about it. Because being in a relationship was something she couldn’t have. It just wasn’t in her future and over the years she’s grown to get used to that. So it was best she admired from afar, because that would be the only way she could stay… happy.

❊ ❊

Saturday rolled around a lot faster than usual. During a normal week it felt like years until the weekend rolled around – not that the weekend even really mattered because it wasn’t like Y/N got to go out and have fun anymore, but the idea of it being the weekend settled her mind because that was another week down the hatch.

It was also time to finally see Harry again. Maybe she was being dramatic because she only saw him two days ago so really it wasn’t that long of a wait, but Friday’s tended to be her most crucial day and it zipped by no problem.

Her normal Saturday crowd rolled around, and so far there had been no sign of Harry strolling in with Abby. Everyone else in her beginner group had arrived and she couldn’t prolong class any longer, so with a clap of her hands and an instruction to begin the basic maneuvers she had taught them, she tried not to focus on his absence. Why sign your daughter up and not show up? If anything that was more rude than anything, but maybe something important came up and all harsh thoughts flew out of Y/N’s head.

Around fifteen minutes after class started, the familiar clanky bang to the entrance of the rink sounded as someone threw open the door, causing Y/N to glance up, seeing an out of breath father and daughter with looks of nervousness etched across their features. Y/N excused herself for a moment to greet them, giving the pair a warm smile despite all of the negativity swarming her brain.

“I’m so sorry we’re late. Something came up and I– it’s not too late right?” Harry asked worriedly as his daughter just looked up to her new teacher with the same amount of shyness as Thursday.

Y/N dismissed his worry with a simple hand gesture to reassure him, beckoning Abby to sit down so she could help her tie her skates to her feet. She was clad in these pink patterned leggings and a white sweater to keep out the cold matching with little white skates that had pink laces. Y/N could sense the excited energy emitting from her little body the moment her second skate was fastened to her foot. Standing up with Abby’s hand in her own, the two looked back to Harry as he looked beyond nervous for his daughter to touch down on the ice.

“Try not to worry, she’s in good hands. You can go and wait with the other moms over there – and by the looks of it, they seem really excited to meet you,” Y/N paused as her and Harry looked over his shoulder to the mom’s who were ogling him without even trying to hide it. Y/N couldn’t help but giggle at their overt staring, causing Harry’s cheeks to redden and for him to nervously wave at them. “Or you could always leave and come back at one-thirty.”

Harry nodded to her suggestions, taking a glance again at the woman standing around a table and still watching him. “I think… I’ll stay this time. See how her first day goes. I also don’t know how comfortable I am leaving her on her own for the first time just yet,” he rambled, running his fingers through his hair.

Y/N tried her best to hide her smile at how endearing it was to see him be so nervous for Abby, because it genuinely seemed like she was his life even if she’s only known him for a total of thirty minutes. It’s adorable. He’s adorable.

Leaving him to do as he pleases, Y/N led Abby to the rink, hand in hand, introducing her to the other children and going extra slow with her since she already missed a few lessons in regards to the other kids and what they could do already. And for her first day, Abby was doing a pretty job in getting the hang of feeling the ice and letting it glide her along. The little girl had skating in her blood, and Y/N prayed that she stuck with it because she could very easily have an inclination to the sport.

Every once in a while Y/N would look at Harry, seeing him avoiding the flock of mother’s and their constant whispering and staring at him as he stood against the edge of the rink, sometimes looking at his phone, sometimes looking at his daughter and standing upright every time she had a misstep.

That was maybe the most tumultuous and excruciatingly nerve wracking hour and fifteen minutes for Harry to ever have to sit through, even worse than medical school and interning and residency and everything else he’s gone through to get to the point he is now. Watching his daughter, his precious little girl fall on hard ice and trip over her own two feet countless times while he was helpless because he was off on the sides, was the absolute worst and he doesn’t know how he’s gonna manage this for however long she wants to do it.

When he finally got his hands on her again, he hugged her close and congratulated her on her good work for her first day, kissing her face a whole bunch of times to express how worried he was. After what seemed to be fifty kisses, Abby was shoving him away and giggling at how his stubble was scratching her face.

Y/N couldn’t help but stare at how relieved Harry was for the safe return of his daughter into her arms, all but cooing as he planted many pecks of kisses to her cheeks and nose and forehead. She also couldn’t help but wish he’d give her love and affection like that but she laughed to herself at her wishful thinking. Bidding her goodbyes to her beginner group and welcoming her more advanced, Y/N realized at the last moment that Harry and Abby had stayed behind, hoping to get one final word in before she had to go to her next group of kids. Telling her kids to get some laps in around the rink, Y/N made her way over to Harry and could immediately see how relaxed he was now.

This time, it was actually Abby to say something first. Unbeknownst to Y/N, Abby actually really liked her and couldn’t wait to see her again on Monday for her private lesson. “That was s’much fun! I’m g’na be so good my daddy thinks,” she gushed, hugging her father’s leg as she muffled her giggles against his jeans.

“You’re going to be an amazing figure skater,” Y/N responded, reaching her hand down for a high five from the little girl.

“Thank you for… not letting her get extremely hurt or anything. I’m sure my anxiety will go away soon enough,” Harry chimed in, his heart slightly fluttering at the sight of his daughter actually talking to someone without him encouraging her to do so.

“It would be strange if you weren’t nervous,” she shrugged, standing to her full height in her skates, which reached to just below his eyebrows. Turning around to see a few of the girls in their normal bickering fest, Y/N had to excuse herself to tend to her class, bidding her goodbye for the day to Harry and Abby.

And when Harry wasn’t the one to show up on Monday to drop Abby off but her nanny, Y/N couldn’t help but be disappointed. She can’t say she’s surprised since he’s an adult and probably has his own job to tend to at noon on a Monday, but as she guided Abby around the rink with simple skating motions, she wished he was standing against the rink watching them. Though it did spark a question in her, if the nanny was dropping Abby off, was it because there was no one else to look after her meaning he didn’t have a wife or at least someone who lived with him unless she too also worked which wasn’t an odd thing, but Y/N was an overthinker and maybe if she did grow the balls to ask she’d have an answer for herself and get rid of all of this underlying anxiety.

When their time was done for the day, Abby cheerfully said her goodbye, hand in hand with Natalie her nanny. And for the rest of the day, all Y/N could think about was something Abby said to her on the ice, something that sent chills down her spine that weren’t caused by the cool atmosphere of the arena. “My daddy thinks you’re pretty. I think he likes you, but y’can’t tell him I told you.”

❊ ❊

He didn’t come Wednesday either. And she was convinced he wasn’t showing up Saturday because that was just her luck. But, when he did ten minutes before the group lesson started, Y/N couldn’t suppress the smile and this overwhelming sense of relief. Relief about what? She couldn’t quite put her finger on. She figures it because she has a crush on him, and whenever anyone sees their crush it’s hard not to be happy. But that doesn’t settle well in her brain. She doesn’t like the fact that she’s happy to even see someone’s face, she shouldn’t feel this sense of relief that he’s here again, she shouldn’t be focusing on anything other than her jobs and how she was going to afford going grocery shopping this week.

Yet, she happily waved to Abby and blushed at Harry’s genuine smile towards her, immediately thinking of Abby’s declaration from Monday. She internally scolded herself for acting like a little teenager, urging her skin to make itself feel less heated.

It also didn’t help that she told Kelly about this and she had her nagging words playing in her head to just ask the poor guy if he has a girlfriend or a whoever. Abby ran to the nearest bench to remove her boots and tie her skates, which per usual she needed help from Y/N, which Y/N didn’t mind. Harry bent down near her, his hand a few inches from her knee as he picked up his daughter’s boots, their eyes quickly meeting before just as quickly disbanding, before he stood up and quickly shoved her things into an open locker.

And also as per usual, Harry’s heart couldn’t help but flutter as he watched Y/N act so domestically with his daughter, asking her about her day and tying up her skates. His eyes slowly scanned over the features over her face, taking in each little blemish that made her face hers, subconsciously smiling the moment she smiled at something Abby said. He found himself enticed by the way she held her hair back from her face with a bandana wrapped into the ponytail, and couldn’t stop himself from dragging his eyes over her sweater covered shoulders and the curves of her breasts in her shirt, stopping at where her hips sat tucked beneath her leggings.

“Daddy?” A small voice snapped him out of his daze, his face turning red in an instant at the prospect that he had just been caught staring; and he doesn’t even know for how long.

Licking his lips and darting his eyes to his feet then to his daughters face then to anywhere but her he stuttered, “Uh- yeah, love?”

“We going now,” she spoke, her eyebrows furrowing as to why he seemed so nervous.

All he could do was nod his head and purse his lips, sitting himself down on the bench to collect his thoughts. He repeatedly questioned to himself why he had to be so fucking obvious, all but smacking his forehead in embarrassment.

When she turned to walk with Abby, Y/N couldn’t help but smirk to herself as the image of Harry staring at her so intently was now permanently imprinted into her mind. He was checking her out, no doubt about it, and again that sense of relief flooded her body as she relived it over and over again. It was probably a mistake and it was probably one of those things when he just so happened to look at her when he went into deep thought about something totally not related to her, so she can’t hope it’ll happen again, but boy was it nice while it lasted.

When she was instructing everyone on today’s task and glanced over to him leaning against the outside of the rink, she noticed his eyes on her again, but told herself he was too far away to clearly depict what he was looking at and honestly he was probably only keeping his eyes on his daughter.

Because he wasn’t interested in her. Men like him don’t have interest in women like her; broken and unfixable.

It was a load of bullshit, because Y/N knew she deserved something good after all of the bad she’s faced and still currently facing, but he was just too good and someone like him could never settle for someone like her. He wore expensive clothing and his daughter was wearing one of the nicest brands of skates. He most likely had a very stable and successful career and there was no way he could settle for her, a girl who was always days late on her rent.

The unsettling reality made her jaw clench, her throat tighten up, and caused her gut to twist painfully.

If she hadn’t been put through this scenario before she’d say she would’ve broken out into sobs, but she held herself together for the time being, knowing she was going to let a few tears escape her tonight in bed. And, she’d never forgive herself for crying in front of anyone, especially the man that was the root of it.

Yet, her thoughts didn’t stop him from staring. And when she lapped around the ice, passing in front of him and watching his eyes look anywhere but her, it made her believe that maybe he was actually looking when he thought she wouldn’t notice. And suddenly she was back to rethinking before and how his light eyes fixated on her chest before trailing down the curve of her waist and stopping at her hips. It was a sight that would’ve made her knees buckle if she were standing.

When time was up for the day, Y/N let out a sigh at the thought of waiting another week to see Harry. Even if she didn’t let herself imagine a future with him, she still loved seeing his handsome face for the hour and a half they had together. She sounded so pathetic to herself, but when she saw him talking to one of the other mother’s, admiring the movement of his jawline and the dimple that would appear every once in a while on his cheek, it was safe to say she was utterly infatuated with the sight of him and she didn’t care.

Abby all but ran to her father for a hug, hobbling and struggling a little to balance herself on the blades, urging him to pick her up. Harry walked them over to the same bench from before, helping to untie the laces and hand her her boots and jacket. He was quick to notice that Y/N didn’t walk her out of the rink today, seeing her slowly gliding around in circles as she waited for her next batch of skaters to join her. His stomach dropped a little, his mind immediately wondering if he had done something wrong to warrant her unusual absence this time around. It wasn’t possible for him to have upset her anyway, he doesn’t think, so he stood up with Abby in his arms and neared the edge of the rink again, standing to where she was absentmindedly approaching as she was lost in thought.

She didn’t even realize she was about to slam into the wall if it weren’t for Harry sticking his arm out and preventing her body from colliding against the surface. Y/N quickly snapped herself back to the present, eyes going wide in shock as she put at least a foot of distance between herself and the wall, which also unlatched Harry’s arm from her waist.

“I’m – wow, I’m sorry I didn’t realize how close I was to the wall,” she apologized, scrunching her eyebrows at how she could’ve gotten so lost in her own head to not notice a wall that was approaching.

“Have nothing to be sorry for,” he shrugged in response. “Just wanted to say thanks again for watching after her,” he ticked his head at Abby.

“And to say I’ll see you next Saturday. I’m not able during the week to drop her off but I tend to have off on Saturdays. So,” he pauses for a moment, “I, uh – yeah.”

Y/N nodded her head with a small smile, opening her mouth to say she’ll see him next week but he spoke again before she had a chance to push the words up her throat. “Unless I can see you before that.”

Her eyebrows shot up to her forehead, her head slightly cocking to the side at his sentence, wondering if he was asking what she thought he was asking. And again before she had a chance to question him, he beat her to the punch again.

“That was supposed to come out a lot smoother,” he grimaced, nervously laughing to himself as even his daughter looked at him with embarrassment for him. Y/N let out a small chuckle, trying to overlook the fact he just asked her out.

Guess that answers the question if he has a girlfriend.

“Well, I don’t know. Tonight’s my only night off and tomorrow is my only morning off and I think that’s a, uh, little short notice,” her words coming out a lot more sad than she intended. But, maybe at this news he’d say forget about it and just leave her to lonesome because that’s what was best. She needed him to turn it down himself so she wouldn’t feel guilty and so neither of them would harbor any feelings they didn’t need. It would certainly become too messy and Y/N didn’t need more of a mess in her already disorganized life.

But, he didn’t take the bait.

“Tonight works!” He rushed out, hitting himself over and over again mentally as he basically radiated desperateness. “What I meant to say was, I’m available tonight if you are.”

Y/N mulled it over as quickly as she could while on the spot. She couldn’t say no, she never said no, it wasn’t her to say no but there was no way she could possibly say yes. She had to maintain her level of normalcy and that included not going on a date with Harry.

“Yeah… tonight works.”

Well shit.

❊ ❊

“Wear the blue one,” Kelly muffled through the crunch of her chips.

“You think? My boobs kind of,” she paused, aiming the camera of her phone to the shirt on the bed, toying with the dip that sat on her breasts, “Spill out of this one.”

Kelly tilted her head, not blinking at her friend, slowly nodding her head and saying, “That’s kind of the point.”

Y/N rolled her eyes, tossing her phone onto her comforter to use both hands to hook her fancier bra on and slip on the long sleeve blue cotton shirt that tied around the front in a nice bow nestled between her breasts. It felt a bit much for a first date.

But maybe he would be intimidated and put off to how she was showing herself off and wouldn’t want to be seen out with her again. She could only hope.

He insisted he pick her up for the night, and even though he was only going to see the outside of her building, she was nervous he would just smell the poor that stunk up the area. It made her gut wrench and her heart to sink at the idea of him not liking her for her money – or lack thereof, but she really was going to try and enjoy the night.

She deserves one good night.

Her black flare jeans sat snugly on her legs, reaching just up past her belly button, leaving only a sliver of stomach visible between the shirt and jeans. The skin of her chest was a whole different story seeing as how there was basically nothing there to cover her up.

Picking up her friend again to show her final look, Kelly let out a squeal again through her chips, thoroughly agreeing with the choice of attire. “He’s gonna eat you up.”

“Well, I hope not. That’d be an awkward night,” Y/N snickered, tying a black bandana into her usual ponytail.

“Well if you’re lucky he will. In the good way of course,” Kelly winked, eliciting a groan of displease from Y/N.

“Do we know where he’s taking you?”

“Mm, no, he just said to dress casual,” Y/N shrugged, slipping her feet into her flat mules. She actually was pretty satisfied with how she looked for the night, hoping it wouldn’t turn out so horrible. It’d be a shame to waste a nice outfit.

A text notification sent to her phone, alerting her that Harry would be at hers in approximately five minutes. Quick to say goodbye to Kelly and promise to tell her everything, Y/N shut her phone and took the remainder of her alone time to really sit and mentally prepare herself for what was to come.

Trying to navigate how she feels about the entire situation was a lot to take in because it’d probably been close to a year since the last time she even interacted with a male let alone go on any sort of date. She was nervous and intimidated and her anxiety was sky high. She wanted this to go right she really did, but she couldn’t push away those doubts that she would ever meet someone who actually cared about her and properly had their head on their shoulders.

When her phone sounded another notification, Y/N was quick to gather herself and run out of her apartment, giving Harry no time to come to her door even if he wanted. Spotting him standing next to a very nice Mercedes, she had this flashing image of him grimacing at just the sight of her battered front door. But, she smiled at him nonetheless, appreciating the sight of him clad in a nice pinstripe button down shirt with the first two buttons undone, and nearly salivating at the sliver of chest being exposed to her.

And to make everything just so much better, he was holding onto a bouquet of various flowers, looking nervous as ever. Especially when he saw what she was wearing. His eyes nearly popped out of his skull at the sight of her exposed chest and he hates that his cock throbbed under his jeans. “You look… stunning.”

Y/N’s cheeks heated at the compliment, her head bowing down to look at her shoes before looking back up and taking the flowers from his outstretched hands. “Not too shabby yourself, Mr. Styles. These are beautiful, thank you. I don’t even know if I have a vase,” she nervously laughed, sniffing the flowers now in her hands.

“Just, uh- give me a second to put these inside.” And then she was turning on her heel and running back upstairs to toss these on the table by her front door. She made a mental note to buy a vase the next day, all while also keeping Kelly updated on what’s going on through texting.

When she came back downstairs, Harry was still next to his car, hands in his pockets as he looked around at nothing in particular. At the sight of her returning presence, he perked up, opening his passenger door for her. Even the inside of his beautiful car, the smooth tan leather practically calling to her as she neared closer. “This is a beautiful car,” she blurted, sliding into the passenger side.

He closed the door, quickly walking to his side and hopping in, “Thank you, she’s my baby. Aside from my actual baby, that is,” he chuckled, checking his blind spot before heading out onto the road.

The car ride to wherever they were going wasn’t exactly awkward but it also wasn’t the smoothest experience of their lives. It mostly was a consistent bickering back and forth of Y/N asking where they were going. He only had a couple hours in advance to plan something if he planned anything so how much could he have possibly planned for? But, she was excited anyway because this was nice being able to go out even if it were for just one night.

After around twenty minutes of constant back and forth of laughing and stubbornness, Y/N finally saw where on earth he was driving to. And it was the fair from a few towns over that was held this time of year every year. She’d never actually been herself, but she’s heard stories about how lovely it is and her nerves suddenly started to deplete and were replaced by growing bubbles of excitement.

Y/N can’t remember the last time she had been to a fair, if ever in her life and she sort of felt like a little kid in a candy shop. The moment he parked the car and turned it off, she was quick to unlatch her seat belt and jump out of the car, eagerly hopping on the balls of her feet, waiting to get further into the fair. Harry laughed at her giddiness, holding his hand out for her to take - which she easily slid her hand into his - and led her to the ticket booth to purchase a few rounds of tickets for the rows of games and maybe a ride or two.

“I don’t even think Abby was this excited when I took her,” Harry noted, admiring how happy his date was at the sight of cotton candy and the various stuffed animals kids were holding or were still being hung up.

Y/N hardly heard Harry, silently routing for the young boy trying to win his own date a stuffed animal at the ring toss. “Sorry… I just - I don’t think I’ve ever been to a fair, so this is really nice,” she responded softly, looking up to see Harry with furrowed brows before she retracted her gaze and focused on anything but his saddened eyes.

She didn’t mean to sound so depressing. Thinking about her shitty childhood was the last thing she wanted on this night, and she certainly didn’t want whatever pity was brewing inside that head of his. But little to her knowledge, all he was thinking was how badly he wanted to make this night unforgettable for her. And how badly he wanted to get to know her.

“What do you say we start with mini golf then?” He questioned, pointing towards the miniature mini golf that only had nine holes. “Up for a little competition?”

“Up for a little loss?”

“Oh, oh, so that’s how it’s gonna be? Fine, don’t come crying to me when y’lose, darling,” he shrugged, giving the worker the desired amount of tickets before being handed two clubs and two balls, one yellow and one red.

He lost.

Quite badly too.

And Y/N was smug the entire time. But in a completely endearing way, because ultimately she felt bad at how bad he was at mini golf. It was a makeshift set up so all of the holes weren’t even difficult yet somehow Harry managed to never get below a two on his shots. And the entire time Y/N was smiling at him and poking fun, and even though the night had just begun, she didn’t want it to ever end.

And to think she almost said no.

“I should’ve figured you’d be competitive,” he scoffed, mindlessly grabbing her hand back in his as they walked to their next stop. And she didn’t mind.

“That was not me being competitive,” she laughed, pushing his shoulder gently with hers. “Trust me, you’d know when I’m being competitive.”

“If that wasn’t you being competitive, then what is?”

Y/N thought about it for a moment, wondering if it were worth opening up to him even if about this. She just knew the moment she opened her mouth he would have questions and they were all questions she never wanted to answer. But, against her better judgement, she tore down her walls just a little bit. “I’m a figure skater - or was a figure skater. I don’t take anything less than winning. But back there, I maybe messed up a few shots so you could catch up.”

“Oh, how sweet,” he feigned appreciation, bringing his free hand up to his chest as if he was deeply touched. He was about to ask her a follow up question, wondering what she meant by was a figure skater, but she pulled him to the balloon dart booth, geeking out at the little rainbow bear that was hanging above the worker.

“You should get that for Abby! Told me she doesn’t have a favorite color, and I think she’d love a rainbow bear from her daddy,” Y/N insisted, taking the correct amount of tickets from Harry and giving them to the very bored teenage girl.

“Shouldn’t I be winning you the bear?”

“You can win me another one if you want. This one is for your daughter.”

Harry knew Y/N for a total of three days essentially. And he’s spoken maybe a few sentences to her before tonight. Yet, despite the logistics, he so liked her. There was something about the girl next to him that was adamant he win the prize for his baby girl instead of her that made his heart flutter and made his mind swirl. He hardly knew her, yet he could just tell she had a heart made of gold. Every other woman he’s been on dates with over the years were always immediately turned off to the idea of him having a daughter, begging his attention to be solely on them. But not Y/N. She was embracing Abby with open arms both physically and mentally, and that was an automatic yes in his book.

Abby was his everything, his light at the end of the tunnel, his eternal sunshine. They were a package deal, and have been for the past four years. That much was clear to Y/N whenever Harry talked about her, or how his face basically lit up at any question revolving around her. He didn’t go into much detail, but Abby’s mom wasn’t particularly in the picture anymore, so it was just her and him. They were best friends and Harry wouldn’t change that for anything or anyone. And Y/N respected that a lot, absolutely loving how close they were and how much she meant to him. It was sweet and deep down made her envious, wishing she had a relationship like this with her parents.

When he finally won the little bear, he was so proud of himself and agreed that it was the perfect gift for Abby, holding onto it as they walked over to the food concession for something to eat. “I bet she’ll never get rid of it. When she’s eighty and reminiscing, she’ll pull out the bear and immediately think of you.”

“Please don’t say that; I don’t even want to think of her being five,” he shuddered, letting out fake weeps at the thought of his daughter growing up.

“What about her dating? Hm? Wanna think about that?” She teased poking his side causing him to look at her with the nastiest glare he could muster before promptly turning his head away with a huff, his chin sticking high in the air.

“Alright, alright, I’m sorry. No talk about her dating or growing up, I swear on it,” she held up her three fingers in scout honor, making him chuckle at her gesture.

“Can I say how good she’s doing in her lessons though? She has a real talent for skating, I think she should go somewhere with it,” Y/N mentioned, grabbing their drinks they ordered as he held their food and walked over to a clear table nearby. “A lot of kids her age or at her beginner level can hardly keep their balance on the ice but, Abby doesn’t need to hold the wall or my hand and that’s only after three lessons. I’m not kidding, Harry, I think she’s meant for this.”

He nodded at her words, surprised at the revelation that Abby actually liked something and was good at it. This wasn’t the first time his daughter gained interest in some hobby before turning on it just a week later. “We’ll have to see if she sticks with it.”

“Maybe you should tell her to. I just don’t want to see something potential be wasted,” she disclosed, dipping a french fry into her little cup of ketchup. Harry picked up on how strongly she felt about this, seeing her get lost in her own thoughts for a few moments before regaining her hold on reality and locking eyes on her date.

“When did you start?” He questioned, biting into the straw of his drink.

She swallowed her fry, twirling the ends of her ponytail around the pads of her fingers. “Started when I was six. It’s good that Abby started early, gives her more time to practice,” she nodded with a smile, and it was so obvious that it was a pained smile as she thought about whatever was going on in her head. And it was hard for him to not notice the obvious deflections every time he tried to ask her about herself.

“Practice for what?”

“Well… What if she can be in the Olympics one day? She’ll need as much experience as possible,” she shrugged back, her voice seeming to grow softer the more they talk about this.

“I assume the Olympics is the ultimate goal?” He wondered, his eyes dancing over the way her face slightly twitched into a frown before being masked by a laugh and bright smile.

“Uh, yeah! It’s every skater’s dream. It’s what we fight so hard for, or maybe that was just me, I don’t know, but wouldn’t it be cool to say your daughter is an Olympic skater or an Olympic medalist? Automatic dad points,” she joked lightly, her eyes hardly meeting her smile.

“Y/N did you ever… make it to the Olympics?” He wanted to ask, he felt he needed to ask, yet at the same time he knew he shouldn’t have. Immediately her fake smile dropped and a layer of sadness washed over her features, something dark flashing across her eyes as her gaze dropped to the table between them.

It’s every skater’s dream. It was her dream, her ultimate endgame, it was everything she wanted and it was within reach of her fingertips. She could practically hold the gold medal in her hand, could see the camera’s flashing, could hear the people cheering, and could feel the adrenaline pumping through her veins as she skated along the prestigious ice.

But it never came true. And it never will.

Instead she’s a part time trainer, and a part time waitress. She can hardly afford her apartment and is just barely getting by. She was just within reach of Heaven, but then she plummeted straight to Hell.

Y/N shook her head softly, eyes glossing over with a light sheen of tears, her teeth nibbling on her bottom lip to help her prevent the pesky tears from falling down her face. Her hands instinctively started tugging on the ends of her hair a little harder as she mentally beat herself up for her lost opportunity. “I, uh - had an accident,” she murmured, finally looking up to meet his stare again. There was something about him that made opening up so much easier than it usually is. Maybe it’s because he genuinely seemed curious and cared to know more about her. Y/N couldn’t exactly tell but for some reason she broke down her walls just the tiniest bit more.

“I fell on a landing at Nationals, which was my entrance to the Olympics if I ranked third or higher. I dislocated my hip and twisted my ankle and that was the end. It happened a long time ago though, I’m over it now, I’ve moved on,” she reassured with that same fake smile, taking a small bite from her burger that she’d barely had touched.

It was clear she hadn’t, but they didn’t touch upon the subject anymore.

“Anyway, what about you? What do you do?”

Harry’s main flaw - at least to him - was that he was such a nosey person. The way their conversation around her sort of just terminated abruptly did not sit well with him and that was because there was so much more to the story that she wasn’t letting on. He figures though that since this is only a first date, he can’t pry too much into her life because he doesn’t want to drive her away. Despite her being closed off about herself, he really liked her and he really didn’t want to mess this up.

“I’m a pediatric surgeon,” he spoke nonchalantly, as if it weren’t an actual big deal. But, when he looked up to see Y/N’s eyes bulging out of her head, he guessed he was wrong, it is a big deal.

“You’re a surgeon? Like Alex Karev from Grey’s Anatomy, pediatric surgeon?”

Harry laughed at the comparison. It wasn’t the first time someone brought it up. “Yeah, but a little more real.”

“That’s… Wow, that’s so cool. What made you want to do pediatrics?” She hummed, swallowing her final fry, and chasing it down with the last of her soda.

“Abby. When she was born she had a small abnormal murmur in her heart and I knew that from that moment I wanted to do everything I could for parents and their children.”

As if he wasn’t perfect enough, he just had to be a children’s doctor. It was as if he took Y/N’s heart and strangled it in love and admiration, then stomped on it and left it lying in the dirt beneath their feet. She didn’t match him on any level. She was far from successful and he was so far past it.

All Y/N could continuously think was how could this possibly work out? She was trying her best to look on the bright side, to think positive thoughts, but she just… couldn’t. Him and Abby deserved good, not broken.

The rest of their time at the fair went fairly smooth. They were happy and joyous aside from their little chat when eating and if Y/N didn’t overthink too much, she’d want to see Harry again. She was free in the morning and was tempted to ask him to breakfast or brunch or something. She didn’t want this to end, she wanted to live in this happy bubble for the rest of her life. But, she couldn’t be selfish and needed it to end. It would be good for both of them if they just put this behind them.

When Harry pulled up to the curb in front of her building, he put the car in park and was quick to run around to the other side to open her door before she could get the chance. He took her hand and helped her out leading her to the door that led to the stairway. And if it were being selfish, Y/N didn’t care as she asked him to walk her to her door.

They stood in the small hallway, right outside the old wood of apartment 2, neither of them knowing what to say. But, then in an instant, nothing needed to be said as Harry leaned forward slotting his lips against hers in a quick kiss, his hands coming to rest on the sides of her face as her hands held onto his firm shoulders.

It only lasted a few seconds, maybe five at best, but those five seconds said so much more than anything they actually spoke the entire night. Y/N knew there was no way she was going to be able to let him go, because he was the best thing to happen to her in a long time, and why should she have to give it up? Despite all of the negativity swarming around in her brain she still wanted to get to know him, and she definitely wanted to kiss him more. Maybe it would turn out to be a mistake, but what’s life without a little risk?

The moment Harry touched his lips to hers, feeling the soft plushy texture of her mouth that he had been dreaming of kissing since the moment he first laid his eyes on her hours ago, he knew he was whipped. He knew her for three days and he couldn’t imagine not being able to kiss. And maybe he was desperate or pathetic, but what’s life without a little leap of faith?

“Goodnight Harry.”

“Goodnight Y/N.”

❊ ❊

Saturday’s became their day. It was Harry’s only full day off and Y/N’s only night off, so it became convenient for their dates that have now been on every Saturday for the past two months. And ever since that first date, it was easy for them to say they’ve never been happier.

Y/N’s still trying to find her footing in this whole relationship thing, still finding it hard to believe that some like Harry could possibly like her. She was coming around though. Abby made it a point to tell her every time she saw her when her father wasn’t with her that he says hello and wishes he could be there. Then Y/N would ask her the same every time she left.

The first week after their original date, Harry had walked in with Abby, and without even thinking about it, walked up to Y/N and planted a soft kiss to her right cheek, despite the gawking eyes of the mother’s behind him. They could practically feel everyone’s eyes on them, but it was okay, because it was just a little price to pay for happiness.

That same night he took her out to dinner - at her restaurant of all places, and the entire night was a mess of embarrassment as her coworkers sent her coy looks every now and again that Harry could also very obviously see. Y/N tried to pretend that she didn’t know any of them, but when their waitress also just so happened to be Kelly of all people, it was hard to ignore. And it made for quite the conversation when she had to tell him she worked two jobs and that’s why she hardly had time to even breathe during the week.

What surprised her most when she told him of her misfortunes, was how well he listened. He didn’t seem turned off to the fact she didn’t have one singular stable job, like other men have in the past, and rather he seemed like he didn’t care at all. It was a nice change of pace for Y/N to have someone who seemed interested in her rather than just sex.

Two months had passed and the topic of sex hadn’t really been brought up either. Which again was a total shocker to Y/N since she’s so used to guys asking as soon as they meet her. Yet, the only time she and Harry had mentioned it was when they had been in his car one Saturday night, things getting a little heated as she climbed onto his lap, their mouths dancing together as their tongues lapped over one another.

The make out session wasn’t even meant to get as intense as it did, the gentle rocking of their hips together and the sloppy kisses placed on each other’s necks while her fingers tangled into the curls of his hair and his palms rested gently on her hips right over the swell of her butt, all of it wasn’t even supposed to get that far. But it felt way too good to stop.

Y/N always put her romantic life on the back burner in regards to trying to navigate her actual life instead. Having sex or finding love was something she hardly let herself think about, but when she could feel Harry’s growing erection beneath her center, she forgot how badly she wanted this. It took everything in her to separate their mouths, a trail of spit connecting their swollen lips. It was too much too fast and she wanted to take it slow. She needed to take it slow in order for it to not end just as quick as it started.

And Harry respected her wishes. He didn’t want to mess things up just as badly as her, if not more, and if she didn’t want things to go further, he had no choice but to abide by that.

That didn’t stop him from thrusting his cock into his fist that very same night as he remembered the way she slowly grinded her center against his, the texture of her velvety tongue sliding against his. Those thoughts led him to imagine how her warm mouth would feel against his bright red tip, slowly sinking down further and further until he was grazing the back of her throat.

Since that night the topic of sex hadn’t been mentioned.

When this Saturday rolled around, Y/N was beyond excited for their weekly date night. With their busy schedules it is always hard to see each other during the week no matter how hard they try to fit in some time, so the weekend was always built on a bit of excitement to see one another. And this Saturday was no different, especially since it was Y/N’s turn to plan their night.

After he and Abby left from the usual Saturday lesson, Y/N told him to meet her back at the rink around eight. It wasn’t an expensive date and it doesn’t need a far in advance planning, but this night was truly going to make or break their relationship, because it was easily going to be the most important for Y/N. She planned on opening up to him more than she had with anyone else, and she needed to do that in the comfort of her sanctuary, because - for lack of a better term - she was shitting bricks.

As per usual Harry had arrived right on time. Measuring time had to be their biggest difference, because Y/N always felt like she had a lot more time than she really did, which resulted in her always being late for everything. Harry on the other hand was a very organized man and scheduled himself perfectly to go about his days. Yet the more time they spent with one another, the more they started to adapt to the other, Y/N not being so late anymore and Harry not being brutally early.

Though he did arrive just a minute after eight.

It was a start though.

From the time the rink closed at six, up until the moment Harry walked in the door, Y/N had been busy decorating every inch of the place, setting up their little picnic at one of the tables, stringing lights all around the rink it self, and mastering the best playlist that would be echoing around them until they leave.

Dinner consisted of Harry’s favorite chicken parmesan from her other job that he continued to rave about up until this day because it was just that good, as well as the cookie crumble dessert that had his mouth watering every time he thought about it.

When she saw him knock at the closed entryway, she took a deep breath before scurrying over to him, letting him in from the night time chill outside. They greeted each other with a soft kiss on the lips before she all but dragged him further inside. “Can you guess what we’re doing today?”

Harry’s jaw dropped in anguish, his eyes screwing shut as he whined about the impending future of their night. “Just because my daughter is a prodigy, does not mean I am,” he sighed as Y/N giggled, wrapping her arms around his shoulders as she stood on her tiptoes to try and match his eye level.

“Try not to worry, you’re in safe hands,” she spoke cooly, recalling what she once said to him about Abby. There’s a reason Abby is learning and - not to toot her own horn or anything - she wouldn’t be anywhere without Y/N coaching her through it.

So, how hard could it be to teach Harry?

The answer was very hard.

After they finished their dinner, sitting for a few minutes to let it settle within them, Y/N had to practically rip Harry off of the bench. It didn’t help that they both also had two glasses of wine coursing around in their veins, which raised Harry’s stubborn attitude from a seven to seventeen on a scale of one-to-ten.

He was nervous, that much was obvious, but if he didn’t relax everything was going to be a lot more difficult for the both of them. “Why don’t you skate your little heart out and I’ll just stay right here,” he gestured to the wall of the rink where he usually stood during Abby’s lessons.

“Where’s the fun in that? C’mon, you can even hold onto the wall. Please?” She begged, clasping her hands together under her chin as she pouted her bottom lip and giving him her best puppy dog eyes.

How was he meant to say no to that face?

Y/N must’ve gotten a few tips from Abby on how to win over Harry’s heart, because within a few moments he was caving in and ripping the pair of skates she picked out for him right out of her hands, grumbling a few not so innocent words under his breath. He sat on the nearest bench with a very exaggerated sigh, almost like a child trying to make their point that they were not happy. Y/N wonders if he took that out of Abby’s book.

Watching him trying to even stand on the thin blades was a sight in itself, and Y/N couldn’t wait to get him out on the ice. He looked sort of like a penguin as he waddled across slowly, hand clenched tightly in Y/N’s as he tried to keep his balance. “Y/N I can hardly even bloody walk on a stable surface, how d’ya think m’gonna manage on ice? It’s hard enough to walk on ice and now I’ve got skates on! I’m g’na crack my skull open,” he rambled on, throwing in a few more curses here and there. Y/N knew it was him trying to stall, but it wasn’t going to work.

“Will you relax, I won’t let you crack your skull open,” she shook her head, pushing open the gate to the rink and stepping down easily on the ice first.

The moment his first skate touched down, he almost slipped forward and almost collapsed in a split, making Y/N try her best to not break out into a heap of laughter. He grabbed onto her arm even tighter as he eased his second foot onto the slippery surface, probably leaving bruises for the next day.

“How the hell does Abby do this? M’scared shitless, hope you know,” he grumbled, trying to scoot a little past the wall, but again nearly falling on his ass.

“Hold my hand, let me pull you so you get a feel of the ice,” she contained her giggles. He was hesitant though as he stood in his place, slightly swaying back and forth as he tried to gain the courage to move his foot an inch forward.

Y/N looked at him with soft eyes, observing all of the nerves that were dancing across his features. Lacing her fingers in his, she raised her free hand to his face, getting him to look at her rather than his feet. “You trust me right?” she murmured, looking into his vibrant eyes.

He almost immediately nodded his head in response, a slight look of confusion carving into his face as his eyebrows scrunched together and his eyes flashed between hers. “Of course, why’re you asking?”

“If you don’t want to fall, I need you to trust me,” she spoke reassuringly, leaning up to place a quick peck to his lips before joining him back at his side. Harry took a deep breath in, giving her hand a squeeze before he followed in her instructions and guided along the wall at a slow pace.

Trust was obviously the most important aspect to any sort of relationship, and especially to Y/N. Through her whole life she struggled keeping trust in anyone, and she felt she spent so much of her life getting people to entrust her, yet she can’t remember trusting anyone like she trusted Harry. And it was such a refreshing feeling to see that he trusted her just the same. That’s why this night meant a lot to her, because if he could trust her with his well being and his daughter’s, then it was only right to return the favor.

After his initial fear and trepidation, Harry finally developed a basic movement that helped him in his skating endeavors. He was beginning to gain pride in himself for not falling on his ass yet. They slowly made their way around in one lap after about twenty minutes of missteps and yelps in anxiety. The biggest thing they were going to take away from this experience though was how much fun they’re having. If anything, it’s always good to look on the bright side of things and appreciate the good amongst all of the bad.

When they made it back to the gate, Harry declared that was enough for one night on his part, and couldn’t get off the ice any faster. Y/N was about to follow him, when she mulled over an idea in her head, looking back to the ice. He noticed she wasn’t trailing behind him, and wondered why she seemed stuck in her place. She looked lost in thought, looking around her as she bit her lip in concentration before finally snapping her gaze to meet his after a few calls of her name.

“Is everything oka-”

“This has been my life, my entire life. I don’t know a world outside of this and I’ve kept myself closed off for years. Before you, I don’t think I’ve been on a genuine date… ever because I’ve always been so scared,” she rambled, pacing herself back and forth on the ice.

Harry kept quiet, standing next to the wall now, leaning his upper body down on his elbows. “I’ve been so scared of people getting to know me and my past and my fucking demons that I’ve never given myself the chance to be happy. I grew up privileged, I had - or my parents had money and I was blessed to be able to skate without having to worry about prices or anything of the sort. But, that came with a price which was my parents never letting me breathe and pushing and overworking me, telling me that since they were spending so much money on me that I couldn’t settle for less than the best.

“And I mean, I wanted to be the best anyway; everyone does. But knowing they would be disappointed if I were to get second because I was a tenth of a point behind, hurt like hell. Then, Nationals came and if I placed in the top three, I was going to the Olympics. I was the most confident I had ever been. I knew the choreography, I knew my timing, and I knew how to fucking land… but then I fell. Hard. Twisted my ankle and shattered my hip and it was safe to say I wasn’t going to Russia.”

Y/N looked to her feet and let out a mocking laugh, not even caring that a few tears managed to escape her eyes as she rehashed her past. “As soon as I was able to walk again, my parents kicked me out. Tossed me to the curb and told me to never look back. No money, no friends, no idea of what to do.”

Harry’s heart yearned for his girlfriend. He could tell she had some murky past that always kept her quiet and avoided the topic at all costs, but he never would've guessed it to be like this. He tried to butt in but she held up her hand to stop him, asking him to let her finish. He retracted himself, allowing her to continue on. Harry’s heart yearned for his girlfriend, but it also swelled in pride as she felt comfortable enough to want to share this with him.

“I find it hard to trust anyone because I’m always scared they’ll hurt me like my parents did. If my parents could treat me that way then what’s stopping anyone else?” She took a breath before inching herself closer to Harry, coming to stand right in front of him. “But… then I met you and I find it so easy to let you in, and I think that scares me more than anything. You’re the only person I’ve told this too and I’m working on opening myself up more, I am, I just - it’s gonna take some time. My heart is in your hands, Harry… and I’m begging you to please take care of it.”

Y/N finally finished, swallowing down the clump in her throat, her forehead involuntarily pressing against Harry’s as silence swarmed them. Her doors were opening and her walls were falling down and anxiety traveled up her spine as she slowly stepped out of the dark and into a world she’s never known; A world filled with comfort and happiness. If someone told her two months prior that she would be feeling like this, whatever this is, over a man that was way out of her league, she would’ve laughed in their face and tell them to kindly fuck off.

A few tortuously slow seconds passed by, tears still slowly trickling down her face that Harry took upon himself to brush away. With her doubts and self-deprecating thought process, she was sure he was going to turn around and walk out of her life, leaving her to suffer and wallow alone, just like she was used to. But, then she felt the soft press of his lips against hers, and her body broke down into a pile of tears and cries as relief flooded her.

Y/N grabbed onto his face and pulled him harder against her, their kiss filling with passion and ardor. He held her close, not letting her slip away from him as they broke apart, their foreheads resting against each other again, their noses brushing and their breaths mingling. They smiled at one another, mutually agreeing that actions speak louder than words.

“I promise, I’m gonna take care of you, Y/N.”

And then they were kissing again, this time not as intense but the adoration for one another still leaked through the seams. At this moment, right now, this is exactly where they belonged. In one another’s arms, holding on tight to that trust and pushing aside their worries.

This was all that mattered.

❊ ❊

“I know you’ve got your lavish lifestyle, so please, bear with me,” she cautioned him as she shoved the key into the lock of her apartment door. Y/N had been to his house and it was beautiful as she expected it to be. There was actual room for people to walk around and not feel like they were crowding each other.

Y/N hadn’t actually ever had anyone to her apartment, but even alone she felt crowded in the tight space. When stepping in, the door to the bathroom was on the right, and her living room / bedroom was ahead while her small kitchen and little dining table sat on the left. (this is how i imagine it to look)

The grey blue paint of the walls were chipped in certain places that Y/N has been meaning to fix but hasn’t gotten around to doing. The carpeting looked old and in a certain spot right next to the couch there was a stain from when she accidentally spilt red wine and never was able to get rid of it. A few chinese take out cartons littered her table that she never cleaned from the night before while a few random clothes were strewn about on the floor or her bed. She mentally slapped herself for not thinking ahead and cleaning up after herself, hoping he doesn’t turn around now at the pigsty of an apartment.

“I’m not always this much of a slob…” she grimaced, quickly throwing the empty cartons in the trash, smiling sheepishly at Harry.

“If I didn’t have Natalie, I’m sure my place would look a lot worse,” he brushed her off, looking around at the books she had stacked on a shelf and the small collection of CDs. “I like you, Y/N, a lot. A messy apartment won’t change that.”

Y/N took in a calming breath and nodded her head, trying not to run around and fix everything that was out of place. Instead, she walked over to him and wrapped her arms around his torso from behind, and watched as he shuffled through the CDs, wondering who piqued her interest musically. Just when he was about to tell her he admired her taste, she turned his body around to face her, her soft eyes gazing up at him, lust dancing across her irises.

“Harry?” she coaxed, a hint of flirtation laced into her voice.

“Hm?”

“Can we have sex now?” she wondered, tilting her head to the side by a fraction, like a little puppy or a curious cat.

Harry’s eyes widened slightly at her forwardness, her question making him gulp in shock. They both knew this was exactly why they came here, but just thought that this was happening was enough to send a chill down his spine. His hands came up to cradle her jaw, desire flooding his veins as various images of her naked body circled around his brain, and as he could practically hear her whiney moans filling the air.

His mouth connected to hers in a fast movement, his tongue swiping across her bottom lip to allow him access to meet hers. She greedily opened her mouth, walking them over the few feet to her bed. The back of her knees met with the mattress, her almost falling over, but Harry held her up. One of his hands wrapped itself into her hair, pulling her head back and exposing her neck to him. He peppered wet kisses along the skin of her jaw, before trailing down to the collar of her sweater.

“Can I take this off?” He mumbled, tugging on the hem of the purple sweater that adorned her torso. Y/N ushered out a small ‘yes’ bringing her arms above her head as he brought it up and tossed it to the side somewhere. His eyes fixated on her chest, her breasts nestled into a black lace bra. Harry was practically salivating at the sight, immediately his mouth pressing against her chest, and he traveled down until his lips met her navel, his knees touching the soft carpet beneath them. His hands caressed her bottom, softly kneading the flesh clad in her leggings.

His eyes met back up with hers as an unspoken agreement was shared, him pulling down the soft black material as it pooled at her ankles. Soon they too were tossed aside, leaving Y/N in her matching underwear set that had Harry seeing stars. Normally, she would be nervous about someone seeing her in such a vulnerable state, but just like everything else lately, she’s never been more comforted in the presence of her lover. The way he looked at her body as if it were heaven, his eyes roaming over every inch without a look of apprehension or disgust.

Harry pushed her to lay back on the bed, keeping her feet on the ground as her knees bent at the edge. He placed a kiss on her covered pubic mound, his mouth ghosting over her pulsing core as he bit down softly into the flesh of her thigh, just next to her core. A small whimper left her mouth as he breathed a line of cool air to her heated center before sucking on her other thigh, again going right over where she wanted him most.

His fingers hooked into her panties, bringing them down her thighs, leaving her completely exposed to him as he then spread her legs wide enough for his shoulders to fit between. “So beautiful,” he purred, eyeing her wet pussy with fervor.

Then a second later he was licking a broad stripe through her folds, the tip of his tongue circling around her clit. A moan escaped her throat as she rocked her hips gently to gain more friction against his tongue. He took her legs and draped them over his shoulders as he began to mouth away at her dripping hole, gathering up all of the wetness dripping out of her. He moaned at the taste of her, the vibrations of his noises hitting against her and causing her to shiver at the sensation before a moan of her own was let out.

He reached up to hands, bringing them to his hair, urging her to tug on his curls when he dipped his tongue inside of her cunt. Y/N’s eyes rolled to the back of her head, her hands fisting his hair and pulling on his roots harshly, the sounds of their groans mixing together.

“Harry,” she cried out, her heels digging into his back as she tried to push him impossibly closer to her heat. “Shit... you’re so go-good at this.”

She could feel him smile against her from her words before licking away at her and sucking her clit into his mouth. One hand remained on her thigh, holding on tightly while his other met her pussy, one finger dipping into her and thrusting in at a slow pace. She whined as he added another finger, quickening his pace as he could feel her walls clench around his digits.

“You’re so tight, love. Can’t imagine how y’gonna feel against m’cock,” he grinned, looking up at her through his lashes, leaving one final wet kiss to her clit before removing himself from her completely, her feet falling back to the floor with a thud. She gasped at the loss of contact, eyes rushing over his figure as she tried to coax him back to her.

He giggled at her impatience, stripping himself of jeans and sweater, the bulge in his briefs looking like it hurt as it strained against the material. He palmed himself, a whimper leaving his throat before he leaned down over her and moving themselves further up the bed. He grinded his center against hers, his precum and her wetness leaving a patch of moisture at the front of his briefs. Y/N gulped at the feeling of his covered cock, measuring in her head just how big he was. She assumed he had some length and girth to him just by his aura, but she didn’t expect this big.

When he finally kicked off his underwear, his bright red tip slapping against the underbelly of his bellybutton, Y/N’s jaw all but fell off at the sheer size of him. Immediately she wondered if he was even going to fit inside her or how badly the burn of the stretch of her walls was going to be. It had been a while since she had sex, and now she was nervous.

“Are you even sure that’ll fit inside of me?” She questioned, nibbling at her bottom lip as she looked into his eyes with a little worry.

Harry pursed his lips to contain his smile, leaning down and giving her a quick kiss before whispering, “We’ll take it slow.”

They engaged themselves into a soft make out session, the final piece of clothing being her bra thrown over his shoulder, leaving the two of them completely and utterly bare and vulnerable for the other. No part of this entire night felt rushed and neither of them had this urge to just get it over with. No, instead they took their time with each other, allowing themselves to get used to this new step in their relationship. This night solidified just how serious they were about each other, and taking things slow helped that. It wasn’t about reaching that orgasm or the amazing feeling that comes with it. It was about them and how much this meant.

After he rolled a condom down his length, he positioned himself at her entrance before lacing their hands together and settling them on either side of her head. Then slowly and tenderly, Harry pushed himself in, cries of pleasure leaving their mouths as he stretched her walls. He didn’t thrust himself all the way in at one go, instead rocking his hips slightly back and forth, pushing just a little bit further each time he reentered her allowing her time to accommodate his size. When he was finally all the way in, Harry nearly passed out as her tightness squeezed around him. He stilled himself for a moment, giving her a second to breathe before he pulled back and thrusting back in with a harsher movement.

Y/N was right when she knew there was going to be a burn as her muscles widened around him, and she felt wetness prick at the corner of her eyes before she blinked them away before he could notice. She raised her head to capture his lips in a kiss, looking to distract herself as the pain slowly dissipated into pleasure. Their tongues lapped over one another as Harry quickened his pace, his hips slapping against hers in a more feverish manner. Soon enough, all Y/N could feel was immense pleasure as her once denied orgasm began to build back up.

The tip of his dick, reached so far into her that she could feel him brush against her cervix, a hazy feeling clouding her brain. When he felt her thighs tighten around his waist, and her walls began to flutter around him, he brought one of his hands to her clit, rubbing quick circles on it with his thumb. “G’na cum for me, baby? G’na let y’self go?”

Y/N moaned in response, her eyes screwing shut as he delivered a hard thrust to her special spot, her climax flooding her body quick and hard. She’s never felt herself get off that much, not knowing that she was even capable of that grand of an orgasm. The moment her body calmed down, she felt herself go into a dreamlike state as exhaustion hit her like a train. Harry continued to pound into her, working himself to his own high. Y/N quivered at her sensitivity, but urged him to continue because she wanted to see how beautiful he looks when he comes undone.

His jaw dropped open in the slightest as his abdomen clenched and his prick twitched, the familiar feeling starting in his balls shooting up through his spine before he released into the condom. A lewd string of curses fell from his lips as he gently continued to ride out his orgasm, his body completely spent as they both panted out quick breaths.

Slowly Harry removed himself, taking off the worn condom and tossing it into the garbage before joining her back in bed. “Should get cleaned up,” he muttered, still catching his breath and calming down.

“Mm,” Y/N hummed, turning herself over so her legs tangled with his and her arm draped over his sweaty torso.

Minutes went by when neither of them said anything, and Y/N was convinced he had fallen asleep as his breaths became more steady. But there was one thought on her mind that she needed to get off of her chest, because ever since they started dating it’s been eating away at her. She wanted to get it out of the way as felt her eyes getting heavier.

“Harry?”

A few moments pass before he softly answers, “Yeah?”

“What does Abby think of me? Not as her trainer but y’know… your girlfriend? She tells me how close she is with her mother and I just - I don’t know,” she shrugged, resting her chin on his chest to look up at him.

Harry looked at her, his one hand gently pushing the hair away from her eyes. “She’s the one that told me to take you on that first date.”

Y/N was shocked at this, her eyebrows shooting up at his confession. She knew the little girl liked her as her teacher and the one showing her how to skate properly, but Y/N never knew how she felt about her being the girl her father was dating. Kids don’t always understand how relationships work and Y/N feared the little girl would end up hating her since she was with Harry and her mother wasn’t. “Really?”

He nodded, “She admires you, Y/N. Yeah, she’s close with her mother but in all fairness I think she likes you more.”

“Oh, don’t say that!”

“Why not? It’s true. She can see how happy you make me and I think that’s all that matters to her,” he surmised with a shrug of his shoulders. At this, Y/N couldn’t help but smile, connecting their lips in a gentle kiss before her eyes fluttered close as she nudged her nose against his in a little eskimo kiss.

She was convinced he was her happy ending. He was the voice she loved hearing, and the person that made her life just a little stressful. And boy, she was happy Abby decided to take up skating lessons.

“You make me happy too.”

#WOW #harry styles one shot #harry styles imagine #harry styles au #harry styles smut #harry styles fluff #harry styles angst #harry styles x y/n #harry styles x reader #harry styles writing #harry styles fanfic #harry styles #one direction fanfiction

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razorblade180 · 5 years ago

Text

Twin Snowflakes pt6: A slow morning

Summer:.......

Shiva:*smiling* Aren’t you going to invite me in?

Summer:How is this happening?

Shiva:Come on, your are weak but not stupid. I’m sure you already have a few ideas. *skipping to the bed*

Summer:.....I’m still sleeping aren’t I?

Shiva:Bingoooo!!! *flops on bed* Gods I forgot how soft this bed was! It’s been ages since I layed here; reminds me of the real deal. Can’t wait to lay in it again.

Summer:*glares* Fat chance....

Shiva:Oh wipe that ridiculous look off your face and take a breather. No way I’m fighting you in this place. I just wanna talk.

The young woman layed back up and crossed her legs elegantly as she stared down Summer who was still in the door way. The smug smile that she wore was nothing new to her condescending attitude but it held a certain light hearted feature to it. Summer could tell that Shiva was telling the truth, so why did that only make her more anxious?

Shiva:There’s enough room in this bed for two you know?

Summer:I’m perfectly fine standing here. *tensing up*

Shiva:Whatever makes you less scared. Just when I thought you were getting more assertive. I guess it’s just desperation that made you steal those vials.

Summer:How....I was warm with that happened.

Shiva:Yeah but you’ve been thinking about it nonstop and obviously you’re cold enough for all this to happen. It’s only natural I find out; does natural even apply to us. Huh, something to ponder for later. Right now I’m way more interested in what exactly do you hope to accomplish. I tried digging deeper in that pretty head of yours but I can only get so deep, or maybe you’re winging it. *stands up*

Summer:Like I’d tell you. Just know your days are numbered.

Shiva:Funny, took the words right out my mouth. If anyone knows just how big the difference is from creating plan and executing it properly, it’s you. How many times has it been I wonder, since I left you freezing to death in your own mind? By now your friends and family have to be really tired of dealing with you.

Summer: Their problem is with you, not me!

Shiva:Now now Summer, do you really want to yell at me?

A chill ripped through her suddenly as her feet were frozen in place. The air itself started to get cooler to her discomfort. Despite her efforts, Summer started to shiver a little as Shiva walked closer. A piece of Summer really wanted to scream but refused to. The urge slowly growing though as her captors hand reached out to her. Nimble fingers on her left cheek caused the poor girl to nearly jump out her skin. Something told her that speaking wasn’t a good idea at the moment.

Shiva:That’s better, I really like this room the way it is. As I was saying, you’re nothing but a burden. The one’s you love wouldn’t be tired of me if you were strong enough to get rid of my from the start. Maybe then mommy dearest wouldn’t have a cute little scar that runs across the first one at the bottom. Man can she dodge like nobodies business. I wanted to leave a much bigger reminder of our meeting. If memory serves me well then it was diamond dust that caused the reaction and the whole apartment. History re-

Summer:*grabs wrist* That’s never happening again. You’re not catching anyone off gaurd by a long shot. We’ve learned many things in six years and you’ll feel like nothing but a bad dream in six more. My family will be just fine.

Shiva:Ah, there’s that little fire in your eyes. Always ready to come out whenever someone threatens mommy, daddy, or big brother. It’s the only time you are actually interesting. I wonder if it’ll keep you warm against me, or you’ll burn yourself by clinging to it?

..............

Shiva:Hmph, well I think I’ve had enough fun for the moment. I suppose I should let you rest while you still can; it’s only fair.

Summer:*lets go* Gee how thoughtful....

Shiva:Goodbye little one. I’m gonna enjoy this bed. *puts cover on the floor*

Summer:What are you-

Beep! Beep! Beep!

Her body jolts violently as her eyes open. The right side of her body aches and feels like it’s on something way less soft than she is used to. Slowly her senses come back and notices that she’s currently on floor next to a knocked over heater. Shiva’s surprise appearance started to make sense; just another precaution to add to the list. The dim light hit Summer’s face from the bedroom window told her it was still early. As much as she wanted to move back to her bed, all the strength she had was put into placing the heater back up right. Then she pulled the cover down to the floor with her and went back sleep.

xxx

Year round, Atlas always looked like a work out art at a museum in Nicholas eyes. Freshly fallen snow in the beginning of Winter though, that’s when Atlas becomes the center piece of it all. Crisp air tickles his nose as he walks down the quiet streets with two coffees in hand. Behind him the sound of snow crunching in his previous foot steps gets louder. He raises the coffee in his left hand for it to be promptly grabbed.

Valerie:Five sugars!?

Nick:With a small amount of cream for good measure.

Valerie:Man if there’s one thing I miss about school mornings, it’s this baby right here.

Nick:*chuckles* You do realize you could’ve gotten one of those at anytime you wanted right?

Valerie:Nah, they’re reserved for this moment every time or it feels less special. Coffee on the way to school is our thing; don’t want to abuse that.

Nick:If you say so. What happens when we eventually graduate then.

Valerie:I’ll get it once in a blue moon and remember all the good times of combat school.

Nick:Do good times and combat school even fit together like that?

Valerie:Now you sound like your sister. Speaking of which......

Nick:Doubt she’ll show up today.

Valerie:Such a shame. One of these days a teacher is gonna blow a fuse. I don’t even think the Prince of Atlas could stop them from expelling her.

Nick:They will as long as I make the school look good and please don’t call me that. “A prince is nothing compared to knight that chooses to defend him.”’ I’d rather be the knight.

Valerie:I don’t see why you can’t be both. Your parents might as well be kickass King and Queen but I digress. Can’t really blame Summer for wanting to skip the P.E. physical.

Nick:*eyes widened* Gods I’m stupid,m. Of course that’s why she’s not here. It skipped my mind the two of you have that today.

Valerie:Not surprising, you don’t wittiness the crap that goes down. One of these days I might just fight half the girls in that locker room.

Nick:That bad huh?

Valerie:It’s not like they’re even saying much either, but the way all of them stare. Silently judging and forming opinions about her scars makes me wanna drop kick all of them. *aggressively sips coffee*

He couldn’t help but smile at his oldest friend’s remark. Valerie definitely was never one to put someone in their place. She was typically open and blunt just like her mother. Frankly it was hard to tell if any of Ren’s mannerisms or genes; especially with her hair being short. He sort of missed seeing it long if he was honest with himself. She’s kept it short since the day she decided to start “exploring.” Nicholas took a long sip of his drink to avoid making a frown. Both of them would do anything for Summer; that’s his sister and Valerie is her closest friend as well, but he knows that friendship probably isn’t what compels her to help. He’d have to be naive to believe it was.

Valerie:Hmmm? What’s wrong Nicholas?

Nicholas:Nothing, just thinking about the test is all.

Valerie:Nice try, that’s not a “I’m afraid of a test look.” You’re way to smart and study hard. I bet that expression doesn’t even exist. Something else is up.

Nick:Well maybe this is the first time I’m worried about a test so you finally see the expression? *sips loudly*

Valerie:*pouts* I hope you know that you can tell me anything right? We’re best friends remember. *nudges him*

Nick:Yeah I know?(That’s the problem....)

Valerie:*smiles* So be straight with me instead of giving me the run around.

Nick:I just really want you to lo.........

Valerie:To....?

Nick:To....keep an extra good eye on Summer for the upcoming weeks. Classes are starting again, tournament preparation, the usual bullies, etc. It be a bit overwhelming for her in the beginning. Look after her if she needs any help.

Valerie:Of course! I’ll always be there for Summer!

Nick:Trust me, I know you will.

Valerie:That goes the same for y-

Nick:VAL!!!!. *grabs her arm*

He yanks her left arm to pull her in close to him The sudden movement causes her tense up as they see a car swerve onto the sidewalk at high speed before taking off moments from where she just stood. Her head is still processing the events that unfolded as her body is being held tightly against Nicholas’s shorter and slightly smaller frame. His body shaking with adrenaline. He began shouting at the car angrily.

Nick:LEARN HOW TO DRIVE IN THE SNOW DUMB ASS!!!!

Valerie:Wow, that was.....close.

Nick:*lets her go* Are you okay!? Nothing clipped you?

Valerie:......

Nick:Valerie!?

Valerie:*shakes head* Sorry, I’m alright. That was just ummmm, wow that was close. Lucky you were here. I guess it’s officially that time of the year again.

Nick:The only down side of all the ice and snow. Tsk, I gotta a deal with a whole season of this again. You sure you’re okay?

Valerie:*rotating shoulder* Yeah I’m good. Wasn’t expecting that yank but it’s better than a tire on my chest.

Nick:Oh, sorry about that. Guess I went full force.

A bluish bruise was left where he grabbed her arm. While he frowned at it, Valerie was actually a bit surprised and a bit impressed. Seeing Nicholas that serious outside of a match is a rare sight. Forever he’s cool, collected, and isn’t one to show up that much. She could count the number of times that he’s actually caught an attitude with somebody. Soon her aura kicked in and erased the bruise all together.

Valerie:Look, all better in no time at all. Also no need to apologize for saving my skin. *smirking* Been awhile since I’ve seen that level of pissed off from you.

Nick:*red* Well can you blame me!? Almost had a tragedy today.

Valerie:Oh but we still do...*points to the snow*

Both of them watch the white snow become dyed brown and melting from their spilled morning brew. Sadly they pick up the trash and continue to walk.

Valerie:Better the drinks than me but still a shame.

Nick:Sigh, Maybe I should’ve stayed in bed today too. Tomorrow let’s just ride the bus.

Valerie:*giggles* You’re the boss!

The two of them walked twice as fast to school until they ended up in front of the school. Nothing amazing about the building really. Just the regular combat/high school. Half the size of Beacon or Atlas maybe which makes since considering there’s no dorms. Just plenty of class rooms, a huge cafeteria, and a massive space in the back filled with multiple area’s designed for different sports. All in all the back had to be a least a couple of acres give or take but it’s mostly for the track and plenty of open space. They’ve arrived before most students even though they walked. Winter break must be making everyone a bit sluggish. Thes shiny white and gray hallways should have tons of people struggling to remember their locker combinations right now.

Valerie:Looks like most people are following your sister’s lead about school. Oh well, that just means science might be quiet for a change. Only one way to find out. *walking away* If I see you in between classes I’ll give you the inside scoop on the test.

Nick:I’d rather you just make sure you pass so all that studying wasn’t for nothing.

Valerie:Deal! Consider it my way of thanking you from earlier.

Nick:......

Nick:I don’t wanna be that guy but that gift doesn’t sound worth it.

Valerie:Hehehe, I guess you’re right. Give me some time to think about it. Love ya! *runs off*

Nick:.....Sigh, not the way I wish you would.

Valerie:(Hmmm for second I thought he had something in mind. Oh what to do? Maybe Summer can give me a couple ideas later; possibly even make a whole day out of it!) *grinning* Pfft wouldn’t that be nice?

Nick:*opening Locker* (Okay, Take notes in history for two, Ace a science test, lunch, free period, and then help organize the tournament. Should be a calm day.)

P.A. System:Would all members of the student council please meet in the auditorium during first period? Thank you...”

Nick:Okay, no notes I guess. I can always use free period. Still a calm day. *closes locker*

He turns around to see a middle aged black man dressed in a stylish black suit with a cyan tie and a black fedora with a ribbon around it that matches the tie. The man smiles at Nicholas who displays a neutral face that slowly turns into one of exhaustion, even though the day just started.

Nick:Hello Mr. Coal.

Flynt:Hello Nicholas, shall we talk in the courtyard or my office.

Nick:The principal’s office always has candy so I think you know my answer.

Flynt:Let’s mosy on then.

Nick:Sigh, I wish I still had my coffee.

Part 5

#rwby twin snowflakes #rwby #nicholas schnee #summer schnee #val valkyrie #flynt coal #rwby whiteknight

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anonthenullifier · 5 years ago

Note

Listen I just finished reading An Auspice of Scarlet for the fifth time and like, damn, every time I finish it I just feel completely satisfied. I also need more I love this version of Wanda and Vision! Any chance more is coming? I know you’re on like a hiatus or something right now, but anything would be appreciated. Even just like headcanons (or is that just canon since it’s from you?) or thoughts. I’m just desperate for more.

I don’t think I know how to convey to you the sheer joy I get at knowing you’ve read it 5 times (5!) and still want more! It did drag me out of my hiatus long enough to respond, if that counts for anything. :D

There is going to be more at some point, sadly, however, given all that’s happening in life right now, my current pace of writing is the equivalent of a snail that partied too hard the night before and is now dreadfully hungover. Since you have read it five times though, I can give a brief peek at a very very rough (and 99% likely to change) beginning to the follow-up one shot I’ve been researching and outlining. The story is going to be from Vision’s perspective and focus on all of the factors that coalesce to finally convince him to break his promise to Tony and get married ( @rachelillustrates - it will finally happen!). If you ever want to chat about head canons of their frontier life, you are welcome to PM me!

-Just realized I didn’t actually give you any SV or Wanda, so I added some for you.

****Dear Mr. Stark,

As I write to you, we are approaching the beginning of our third month. Due to the unexpected delays, which I have dutifully outlined in my prior letters, we are currently traversing through Iowa instead of being well into Nebraska. I worry each day what else will go wrong and how detrimental it will be to our timeline. A week ago we discovered the Lyons-Council Bluff line*, so heavily touted by the inhabitants of the prairie towns, does not actually exist yet. The stakes have been laid to mark its path, but going forward it appears as if the railroad is no longer a viable transport method. A thought that, for a time, was unfathomable. We rested for two days in Iowa City, long enough to map out a plan, purchase extra horses to haul the rail car over the rougher terrain, and I was able to find enough materials to reinforce the wheels so that we will not repeat the crisis in Indiana when the tracks uprooted.

The line of the d juts up with a violent shake of the car, no doubt due to a rock in the ground. Vision instinctively glances down towards Wanda, whose slumber is somehow unperturbed by the latest turbulence. He does, very gently, inch her head back up his thigh and tilt her shoulder several degrees so she does not roll off the seat when this inevitably happens again. Next he looks to Helen, who shares a commiserate, exasperated head shake, Amadeus’ driving skills the least refined of the four of them, but the nonstop nature of their schedule means he still is in the rotation, even if he discovers more bumps in the road than is statistically likely to happen by chance.

Vision returns to his letter, frowning at the assault of jagged ink on his otherwise pristine words (truthfully any writing in a moving vehicle is less than pristine, but he has become admirably skilled at it over the months). The intention is to spend one night in Council Bluffs for a reprieve from sleeping on the ground or in these seats, and also, fortuitously, a chance for him to rewrite his letter in a stationary setting. For now he keeps going, never sure how much depth to give or even if the letters ever make it to Tony.

For a time we did discuss rerouting to the south and taking the path through Nicaragua that Dr. Cho and Mr. Cho

He pauses, wracking his memory on whether or not he has shared with Tony the surprising truth of the familial connection between Helen and her traveling companion. Of course he may never have mentioned it because, according to etiquette, gossip such as that is not meant to be shared via ink and parchment, even if Helen would not mind. Perhaps it is best to remain somewhat socially adroit despite the lack of refinement around them. Principles do matter regardless of environment.

traversed to get to the Exhibition. Yet the seaward path is, as Dr. Cho so eloquently phrased it, months of being embraced by soggy air. An environment we all concurred was not ideal in my present state. Thus

Now his s squiggles along, lurching across the paper in time with the inertia that shoves their bodies to the left (his free hand holds Wanda’s shoulder to keep her steady), while Amadeus curses loudly and the horses release aggrieved whinnies. “Amadeus,” Helen has slid her window open and is hanging half out of it as she speaks with their driver in Joseon. Even if the words are incomprehensible to him (if Wanda was awake she would help translate some of it, having shown an astounding predilection towards language acquisition), the tone is unmistakably reproachful.

In his lap, Wanda begins to stir. Immediately he runs his hand gently along her temple, easing her back into a steady sleep.

“Apparently,” Helen returns to her seat, tugging her boots on over the hems of her trouser legs, “we’re stuck in mud.”

An aggravatingly common experience since losing the rails. Vision nods at the information before delicately cupping Wanda’s head, even more delicately lifting it, and then he slides out of the seat, grabs his coat from the bench across from them, and bunches it under Wanda’s ear. He waits six seconds, the average time it takes for Wanda to rouse if he fails at a seamless transfer. At seven seconds she is still blissfully and beautifully at peace.

Vision pulls on his own boots, a shoe choice that was rare at the manor but has become the sole option in the unkempt wilderness where puddles are hidden by tall, swaying grass and unassuming, even idyllic scenes, are frequently rife with moist unpleasantness. It is, per usual, the smartest choice, the squelch of leather sinking into mud greeting him as soon as he steps out of the train car.

“He says he didn’t see it.” The it that Amadeus-by-way-of-Helen is referring to is a sizable sinkhole that appears to be devouring the left rear wheel. It is likely a truthful claim, the knee high grass of the area a perfect screen for most disasters.

Vision walks around the vehicle, eyeing the various junctions where their car interacts with the ground. When he reaches the offending wheel, he squats down, steadying himself with the handhold affixed to the side of the car and ignoring the unhappy grind of the steel fasteners in his joints.

The wheel is stuck, as they already knew. A few careful and serious tugs confirms that it is very stuck, the mud forming a viscous vacuum around the wood where every application of shear stress seems to increase the overall viscosity. Scientifically fascinating albeit disheartening. Back in Pennsylvania, after a surprise deluge, they were able to apply friction to escape. That, however, is unlikely to work now given how deep the wheel has already sunk, and how it keeps settling in with each pull of the horses. Vision stands, allowing the wince at the sharp pain in his hip to happen freely since no one else is next to him.

At least he thought he was alone. “You said it wasn’t bothering you.” Vision does his best not to flinch at the comment, both from surprise and shame, and turns to face the accusation, finding Helen’s arms crossed and face unflinchingly serious.

Bothering is subjective. Every day, every hour, every minute, his body bothers him, stuck in a continuous fight against the unnatural exoskeleton riveted into his bones. There is never a moment where it is not bothersome, but sometimes it is less so, like when he’s deep in conversation with Wanda, all of his attention on her words and the way she forms each syllable and the small touches of her fingers to his hand when making an important or jocular point. Or when he’s working, the singular joy of butlering meant his day was scheduled down to the millisecond with menial tasks to keep his body and mind busy. When distracted, he can pretend, for a brief time, his discomfort is nonexistent. What Helen is trying to imply is that his hip has gone beyond the normal level of bothering into something more worrisome. A fair and not wholly incorrect conclusion. “I believe the way I was seated today has aggravated it.” He knows it is a weak response, as does Helen’s increasingly dour glare.

“When we get to the town, we’re doing a full check.” The understood? is silently implied, which means he provides an equally wordless affirming nod. “Good. Now what do we do about this?”

He shifts his mind back to the wheel. Friction is out. If they had an acceptable item to use as a lever, it could work, but nothing they have on the train, at least without dismantling the vehicle, is sturdy enough or long enough to apply the necessary force needed. If they were not already so far behind in their schedule (at least two weeks, by his calculations), Vision could piece together some sort of gear based lift, or a simple hydraulic process, no more complicated than what he constructed in his youth. Yet it would require dismantling and then remantling the inner workings of the car, a far too timely process. “We could attempt to utilize vector forces?”

“That could work.”

Her quick agreement creates a momentary comfort at the potential success through empiricism. What they will need now is a rope and an anchor point far enough in front of the vehicle to provide sufficient resistance for the application of a perpendicular force. Unfortunately the only thing around them is a vast expanse of swaying prairie grass leading to a horizon of small hills and even more lowly vegetation. “I am not certain we have anything sturdy enough to utilize as an anchor.”

Helen accepts this the way she does any hurdle to scientific advancement, with a shrug and an increased concentration on finding an alternative solution. “I’ll go check the car for anything we could use, we might still have spikes.”

“Thank you.”

While Helen is in the railcar, Vision walks a line from the front of the car, careful not to aggravate the already on edge horses that are now released from their harness and grazing happily from the prairie. Each muddy boot lands with the heel just kissing the toe of his other foot until he is roughly five meters away. He turns back towards the conundrum of the day, mouth falling as his mind works through the calculations, which is a difficult matter given he does not have enough data. What will be the anchor? How much tension exists in their rope? He cannot even recall how long their rope is, although he is certain it is likely not long enough to reach him here, an unfortunate thought given he is not sure even this distance is enough to help produce the necessary Newtons to remove the wheel from the mud. Even if it did work, they need a sufficient perpendicular force. The horses are the strongest, but also the least reliable, especially now that Amadeus is letting them enjoy a bit of downtime and they tend to get obstinate when it is time to move again.

All of this is wrong anyway, he should be assessing this from the end closest to the wheel. So Vision walks back, this time with his usual gait, no longer needing to measure the distance. It’s as he moves towards the back of the rail car that a voice surprises him, “Try to stay optimistic, Vizh.”

“Wanda, I-” The tilt of her lips matches the lightness of her admonishment, his worry lessening slightly. “I hope we did not wake you.”

The pressure of Wanda’s hand running along the edge of his spinal plate immediately calms his mind, a power he still doesn’t fully comprehend but appreciates nonetheless. “Helen woke me up, said you needed some help.”

A correct assessment. “Yes.” Her hand moves along an ovoid path, soothing away the displeasure in his voice until it falls somewhere around incredulity. “I am simply astounded and mortified at the sheer number of vehicular issues we have encountered and we still have all that,” Wanda follows his voice before he even raises a hand towards the never-ending sea of prairie ahead of them, “and more to traverse until…”

“We’ll be fine.” Wanda flashes him a smile imbued with surety, one that sends a jagged jolt along the metal pathways of his body, her confidence growing exponentially since they waved farewell to Tony, this woman remarkably and gloriously at home in their current state of survivalism and independence. “You have me.”

The press of her lips to his cheek renders his mind and body still, enraptured at the sway of her hips, which is made all the more prevalent by her adopting the rational dress standard set by Helen. Vision’s eyes follow as she circles the railcar, hands dancing back and forth in front of her waist, testing the strength of the predicament. Once satisfied, Wanda steps several feet back, heels spread to just past the width of her shoulders, her left foot in front of her right, and then her arms weave a spell through the air, the scarlet energy shimmering, sending prismatic waves along her skin and braided hair. There is never any doubt in his mind nor heart at how much he loves her, but he is always amazed at how much more he loves her every day, particularly when he can witness her in such a free and powerful state.

Creaking emanates from the wheels as they’re loosened from the mud, rising up into the air with a bend of her knees and deep concentration dragging her features down into a scowl. It is awe inspiring to witness this, and yet, it isn’t even her most impressive feat. Around the border of Illinois a bridge over the river had washed away and Wanda, single-handedly, was able to get them across. Truthfully, if not for Wanda and her abilities, they likely would never stand any chance of reaching their goal.

The car settles onto dry land and Wanda wipes her hands, turning towards him with a prideful arc on her mouth. His body responds immediately and instinctively, all else fleeing from his mind except her. Eight steps and his arms can wrap around her waist, pulling her towards him, the laugh eeking out of her mouth echoing inside of his as he kisses her. “You,” he pulls back to look at her, amused and fascinated by the dissipating red in her irises, “are extraordinary.”

“Are you,” the walk of her fingers up his chest matches the feisty pace of her words, “trying to woo me?”

He strives to make his, “Always,” forthright while mirroring her tone. “Have I been successful—”

“We’re losing light.” Helen’s sensible interruption shatters the moment and Wanda ends their physical connection with a sly wink.

*This was a doozy to discover. There are about 5 maps that show the rail line exists in 1853, but then I was able to get an archived first hand account of someone whose father helped build the railroad, and it said they weren’t even building it yet in 1853. Then was able to request a few items through my university’s inter-library loan that also confirm the railroad did not exist yet.

#scarlet vision #vision #au #aos #ask anon #mine #replies #i am now going back into my hermit cave #hoping by early to mid November that 1/2 of the stressors will have been resolved #also #really can't believe you've read it 5 times #that's incredible #and i love you for that

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makeste · 6 years ago

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BnHA Chapter 204: Chintetsu

Previously on BnHA: Shouto left Endeavor on read. Team TodoIidaShoujiRo attacked Team TetsuHonePonySen head-on, hitting them with a wave of ice and freezing them all in place. But it turns out Honenuki’s quicksand quirk is actually a “softening” quirk which can soften anything he touches. He used that to melt the ice to allow his teammates to escape. It also turns out that he had pre-treated some of the surrounding area with his quirk, and Ojiro and Iida came crashing down from their hiding spots shortly after as the softened ground gave way beneath them. Sen attacked Ojiro with his drill quirk while Pony took on Shouji. Meanwhile Tetsu went for Shouto, realizing a direct attack was his best bet. And Honenuki trapped Iida under a layer of the softened ice, but then made the mistake of rehardening it, intending to keep him stuck in place. Instead, Iida blasted free with his Recipro, revealing that he’s built up his endurance to the special move. So now we’ll see if he can take Honenuki down.

Today on BnHA: We get a wholesome Iida flashback to when Tensei explained how to upgrade his Recipro by -- wait, what? Mutilating his own fucking leg?! Holy shit. That’s not wholesome at all. What the fuck. But anyway, it worked I guess because back in the present day Iida is zipping along at speeds faster than Gran fucking Torino, and he’s able to maintain this speed for up to ten whole minutes. The only downside is that he can’t fully control himself because he’s so goddamn fast and so he keeps skidding around. Anyway, so Honenuki is like “nope” and gets the fuck out of there. Meanwhile Sen continues to whoop Ojiro’s ass, but then Iida shows up to save him so yay. Elsewhere the Tetsuroki fight has heated up, quite literally, as Todoroki activates his left side to create a wall of fire, and Tetsutetsu proceeds to walk right through it and attack Shouto as a red hot steel man. Shouto thinks back to his dad’s training and decides that the solution to this is clearly to make shit even hotter, so he starts up with that, and the chapter ends.

(As always, all comments not marked with an ETA are my mostly-unspoiled reactions from my first readthrough of this chapter. I’m caught up with the manga now at chapter 223, so any ETAs will reflect that.)

ohhh my god

IIDA FAM FLASHBACKS!??!

AHHHHH

EXCUSE ME IS THIS THE FUCKING FUTURE OR NOT?? CAN WE GET IIDA TENSEI A FUCKING HOVERCHAIR HERE PEOPLE? IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK. IF ONLY HORIKOSHI WAS AT ALL FAMILIAR WITH MARVEL COMICS -- OH, WAIT

but seriously though. also he’s supposed to be rich too isn’t he? c’mon

also! Iidamom looks exactly like I expected her to. welcome to our canon full of other awesome moms, Iidamom! a few more moms and I’ll be ready to do a top ten moms post. spoiler alert, the winner is not who you’d expect (unless you’re expecting Aizawa, because then you’re absolutely right)

anyways so I got SUPER distracted just now but apparently Tensei is talking about “tuning up” Iida’s engine!

wow can they do that?? fucking quirks, though. wild

oh my fucking god

just yank that fucking muffler right the fuck out. and a new one will grow in!! fucking QUIRKS, though. WILD

dsfalkhsd

just yank that fucking muffler right the fuck out without anesthesia. what are you, a pussy!?

gee thanks Horikoshi for this graphic image of Iida biting down on something while he uses his bare hands to yank what are essentially bones -- or organs, or whatever! the point is they’re part of him! -- right out of his fucking body. might wanna add some vodka to that OJ tonight Iida

OH SHIT, THAT PAYOFF THOUGH

IN TEN MINUTES YOU COULD TAKE OVER THE FUCKING WORLD, IIDA!

okay maybe I got a little overexcited. but damn though!

so he’s DRRNing over to Honenuki and

oh my god

loool at the thought of Iida zooming around wildly for the next ten minutes while he tries to figure out how to stop this thing, and meanwhile Honenuki can’t land a hit on him though

GET HIM IIDA!!

oh fuck

can he breathe under there? you know, depending on how long they still have until time runs out, he could just hide for the next ten minutes and then emerge and drag the paralyzed Iida to Rat Principal Jail

(ETA: actually that was a stupid thought. obviously Iida doesn’t have to keep Recipro activated the whole time if there’s no need to.)

but no, he’s swimming back to Tetsu and the others for now

meanwhile Iida’s still up top and trying to figure out what he’s up to

maybe you should do the same

holy shit we’re cutting back to the kids outside and Deku says Iida’s even faster than Gran Torino

“by a long shot.” that’s fucking fast. and I love it

by the way, with the way Mina was pointing, I thought, “oh, maybe Ojiro’s finally getting the upper hand!”

but no

Horikoshi why do you hate poor Ojiro

it’s probably the pain of this guy kicking you in the chest with his rotating fucking foot

so he’s trying to figure out what to do because he can’t really attack, and he keeps getting hurt whenever he tries to guard

oh hey there

trying to decide if I’m disappointed that Ojiro will never get to do anything cool, or ecstatic that Iida fucking Tenya just pulled off a badass save of this caliber

leaning more toward ecstatic, honestly. sorry Ojiro

oh, Iida

nice use of the word “forthwith”, Iida

(ETA: and nice use of the word “slammer”!!)

and now he’s telling Ojiro to go help Todoroki and that he’ll be right back

well I guess class 1-A will need some sidekicks too

meanwhile we’re sticking with Iida, which means I’m going to keep right on posting all of his panels, because his dialogue honestly deserves a fucking pulitzer prize

never, Sen!

Sen’s trying to reason his way out of this and telling Iida that he shouldn’t let Honenuki get away because he’s more of a threat

and he’s also grumping about Iida interrupting his and Ojiro’s fight. “you shouldn’t interrupt a one-on-one fistfight like that”

um, says who? fuck that. we’re trying to win here, we can make friends after

Iida says if he allows his will to be bent here, it will be bent in the real world as well

basically he’s treating this seriously. well, good

meanwhile! we’re cutting back to two minutes prior!

I guess Tetsu’s best option is to somehow knock him out. but the problem is that Shouto’s reflexes are too good and he can create an ice barrier in an instant

I think Tetsu’s steel would allow him to withstand Shouto’s fire long enough to punch him on his left side, though, so that would be my personal strategy if it were me

heh

A+ attack name. Shouto I’m sorry, I love you, but if I’m being honest I’m rooting for this guy here

heh

so you think he should try the fire instead? I’m not so sure that’s the best play in this case though. at least with the ice he has better control and he can hold him at bay. I just don’t think the fire would be that effective against Tetsu, but I’m sure we’ll find out shortly

because Tetsu’s bragging about how easily he can break through Shouto’s ice defense

ah here we go

for some reason Bakugou actually wanted to go up against this. still don’t quite understand it. my baby boy got a death wish

lol Pony’s running off. honestly a miracle she wasn’t incinerated just now

Shouto’s yelling at Shouji to go after her and Shouji’s all “got it”

yeah I’m thinking my initial assessment was right and this was indeed a mistake

fucking great. now you’ve got a molten steel man after your ass, Shouto

LOL

holy fucking shit. just in case anyone isn’t aware, “chinchin” means “penis” usually. so yeah

and I fucking love that here he’s using it to mean “hot”, but it could also be a throwback to the whole “five peepee man” thing, which he doesn’t actually know about but I do, and so to me this is the funniest thing ever okay

I have no further comment

oh fuck

no but as you can plainly see he is no stranger to burns, so please try not to maim him too badly...!?

lol Vlad has started narrating again. no doubt elated that his team is somehow eking out a win in what initially appeared to be the most one-sided matchup we were going to see today

uh oh but now it looks like Tetsu may have accidentally triggered the quirk development that Endeavor was trying to trigger but couldn’t because Shouto won’t return his damn texts

before I continue to the next and presumably final page of this chapter, I’m just gonna take a moment here to appreciate the irony of Endeavor accidentally conditioning Shouto to never listen to him ever, even on the occasions where it turns out he’s right. he spent years trying to get Shouto to use his flame side, but failed utterly, and then in the span of one fight Deku did what Endeavor had spent Shouto’s whole life trying to get him to do

and now it’s happening again here, where we see that Endeavor was once again trying to teach him something, but Shouto just ignored him until a random kid from the class next door just happened to say something similar. and then it clicked

like, it’s a major burn on Endeavor (no pun intended), but it’s also really unfortunate for Shouto, because his dad has been such a prick until recently that he’s missed out on absorbing the few worthwhile things he actually had to teach him. lot of lost time to make up for here, on both sides

anyways, let’s watch as Shouto slowly processes all this

well I assume (a) because of the “surpassing my limits” thing, and (b) because he’s been texting you nonstop and it was probably on your mind even though you were stubbornly trying to pretend it wasn’t

lol what kind of cliffhanger is this??

he’s not even doing anything! come on Shouto what are you doing to us. this isn’t fair

also, what happened to your hand? why is it all smooth. I assume because of some fire bullshit you’re about to do, but that’s still just weird looking

oh and on the last page there’s a long translator note explaining what I mentioned before about “chinchin” meaning penis. sometimes on select occasions I’m down with Horikoshi perpetually having the mind of a 12-year-old. if he wants to make this a recurring thing I won’t complain, lol

#bnha #boku no hero academia #iida tenya #honenuki juuzou #kaibara sen #ojiro mashirao #todoroki shouto #tetsutetsu tetsutetsu #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #makeste reads bnha #listen though #if tensei doesn't have a goddamn hoverchair by the next time we see him then I am going to start making some calls #and writing some emails #there is no excuse #don't tell me we don't have the technology when a high schooler is out here building jetpacks just for fun #we have sassy robots and holograms but no hoverchairs??#give me a break

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chyrstis · 5 years ago

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Rest (and try to relax a little)

Adelaide is a challenge to write, but absolutely priceless to run around with in-game. Between her comments and Sharky’s I’m dying about 70-80% of the time, and wanted to write something light before finally reaching Jacob’s region.

Rating: T Word Count: 3.6K

Link to AO3!

___

Adelaide is not what the Deputy is expecting, not at all. And with the Whitetail Mountains within reach, she decides it’s better to kick back and rest for once.

She just doesn’t realize how much she’s going to need it.

______________

When Sharky mentioned having an Aunt Addie, Hana had to admit that she had a picture in her mind of your stereotypical TV or movie aunt. Liked wine, tried to get real with the kids while remaining cool as hell, and loved their fair share of gossip. This was the case for most of her friends, at least from what they’d tell her.

Her only aunt had been none of those things, engaging little with her until her mother had died, and only through support checks in the mail. So, when stories came up, she went with the movies instead. Built her up that way. It was a sillier, kinder picture, and one that stuck.

So, she went into this building up just what she thought an Aunty Addie could shape up to me, not expecting much different from that.

But then she met Adelaide, and while a few of those boxes did seem like the kind she’d tick, she blew most of the others out of the water when she grabbed an extra rifle and threatened to rip every last dick off of the Peggies left on her property.

It was a stance that was pretty tough to argue against, and once they cleared them out, Adelaide told them both that she would gladly put extra foot to ass for any other task that they needed her for.

That is, until she brought up Tulip.

Tulip, as it happened, was her helicopter. Her missing helicopter. Hana tried not to break out in a sweat as Adelaide covered the basics of what had happened, how she was precious, and how she wanted her back in one solid, functional piece.

The key words being one, solid, and functional. The odds were not looking good.

Prayer was not her thing. Not even remotely, but she did make a few pleas for mercy as she and Sharky proceeded to shoot down two helicopters in the pursuit of the third. And when she climbed into Adelaide’s pride and joy and stared at the controls, she muttered every reassurance in the book before taking to the air.

The true test came when they were coming in for a landing.

The last chopper she landed she broke the landing gear of. Somehow found a way to bust it while landing it outside of the jail with minimal effort.

The thumbs up Sharky gave her on the descent almost felt like a cruel joke, but she held her breath as they touched down. Squeezed her eyes shut when she really shouldn’t have.

But no alarms went off, Sharky didn’t start yelling for them to bail, and when she opened an eye to check, saw in the distance only the pleased face of one Adelaide Drubman.

The older woman rushed up to meet them, her style cues making Hana think of a saucier Rosie the Riveter, and loved her for it.

“My Tulip! Oh, my beautiful girl, tell me they didn’t hurt you.”

She rested her hands against the helicopter’s frame as the two hopped out, still cooing over it, and Hana tried not to sweat it out at the fact that she could’ve easily pitched the poor vehicle into the side of a mountain. Or could’ve flown in scratched to hell and smoking. Either would’ve been a recipe for hurt feelings all around.

Eventually Adelaide did step back, sighing happily as she took her in recovered ride. “I can’t thank you enough for doing this, and I hope you gave every last one of those goddamn Peggies hell.”

“Fo sho. We lit them up!”

Hana returned the fist-bump Sharky gave her, and found herself grinning like he was. “That, I can totally confirm, and then some.”

“Good. It’s less than what they deserve after royally fucking us after we played nice for the last few years, but it’ll do.” Adelaide set her hands on her hips, and sighed. “It’ll have to.”

The Marina had been shot to hell and back, though most of the buildings had held up to their assault, even with the smoking gunboat left burning by the pier.

“Holy hell. Good thing I was planning on remodeling the place, but…not this early. And not like this.”

She started dragging one of the pallets towards the garage, and Hana tailed Sharky as they ran over to help. Between the three of them, plus Xander and the others Adelaide had working on the marina, they were able to put most of the fires out, and set up watch rotations just in case any retaliation was incoming.

The Drubman Marina was right on the edge of Silver Lake, the largest body of water in the area. If you wanted to take advantage of that, you could use that docking point to transport goods, people, and bliss to any of the Heralds’ chosen territories, and when Faith felt that loss, Adelaide was going to pay for it.

Hell, maybe she could make a call over to the Jail to see if the Sheriff could get a group of people up here. A proper squad for rotations with more firepower to back this up.

She’d still have to get Adelaide’s okay first, but the extra guns wouldn’t hurt, and if the Resistance could get a patrol going here or nearby, the added pushback could be the start to taking the Henbane back. It was an option, and one they badly needed.

“Where are you two headed now?” Adelaide asked, adjusting the dark pink bandana she’d tied around her hair. It’d been rough going earlier, but the older woman hardly showed it. “I wasn’t expecting a visit to begin with, and didn’t think this was going to turn into some kind of a whirlwind two-week holiday. I mean, I’ve got the supplies for it, but…”

“Up north to grab Hurkie.” Sharky jabbed a thumb over his shoulder, aiming towards the mountains in the distance. “Dep here wants to do something pretty damn great, and she wants us along for the ride.”

“Hurk? She wants you two teaming up?” She turned to Hana. “Honey, you do know what these boys are known for, right?”

Hana gave a small shrug, hooking her fingers in her beltloops. “I may have heard a few stories here and there.”

“I’m tempted to ask which, considering you still showed up here with my nephew in tow.”

“Mostly the Testy Festy, and I still can’t believe that’s an actual thing here, but that’s beside the point. I do need their expertise. Not to light giant flaming dicks in fields, per se, but they know their way around explosives, and we do need to light a pretty huge target up.”

“So, spill it. What’s getting blasted, and not in the fun, alcohol-fueled way?”

“Broseph.” Adelaide gave Sharky a look, and he spoke up to clarify. “Stone cold statue Broseph though. Cause if we had a shot at the real him, not gonna lie, I’d go for it. Use the same kind of stuff too.”

Adelaide started to chuckle, looking between the two, and shook her head. “Fucking directly with the Father himself. That sounds almost too good to be true. I thought you were thinking of weeding a few of those goals out, though?”

“Uh, yeah, Aunty Addie, I’ve been doing some more thinking about that.” Sharky made a face, but straightened his posture. “Now, stuff’s still tangled, and I know you said to get on being more proactive in how I want things to go in my life. Planning, short-term, and some long. Mostly short, but a goal’s a goal, man. And not all of them to do with blowing shit up, believe it or not.”

The smile Adelaide gave him, while genuine, had a wry tilt to it. “That’s sounding pretty damn promising.”

“It’s still about fifty-fifty,” he said, waving his hand back and forth. “Er, sixty-forty, if you count the stuff that’ll enable more of that, and if we’re talking Peggies, you really can’t do it halfway without taking a shot at them…”

“Now, hon, you don’t want to be too much trouble.” Adelaide aimed a curious glance at Hana, but her next words were entirely meant for Sharky. “I can respect the fact that you’re trying, but the deputy here might not like being that close to a walking roman candle, let alone one always on the verge of going off.”

“I’ve seen his file,” Hana blurted out, “and he’s already saved my ass a bunch, so it’s all water under the bridge, really.”

Both of Adelaide’s eyebrows shot up. “Well, hell’s bells!” she exclaimed with a laugh. “That’s something I never thought I’d hear from one of Earl’s. Water under the bridge? I’ll have to mention that to him the next time I see him.”

Because you totally have the power of handwavium, Han. That’s just what he hired you for.

“Now, the Sheriff, he did give me some authority, but that’s not…I’m not here to-“ She stopped when she noticed both Adelaide’s amusement and Sharky’s hopeful glance, and groaned. “Shit.”

“I’m just teasing. You keep doing you, and long as you’re helping us, Earl’ll keep on loving the hell you’re raising. Mostly,” Adelaide conceded. “If he complains at you too much, though, just send him my way and I’ll set him straight.”

She had been staring at her feet as her face burned, but when Adelaide gave her shoulder a reassuring squeeze, Hana gave her a small smile.

“Now, I meant it earlier. Rest up and get your energy back, because you’re looking more than a little peaked, hon. Like you’ve been running nonstop for three days straight. Tomorrow’s another day. You two can head out then, and hopefully those mountains’ll still be standing. But I can’t say the same for the dickless wonder waiting up north,” she spat. “You see any sign of my ex-husband looking for Hurk, just dodge him. He’ll try to rope you into his run for Senate, and won��t take no for an answer.”

Noted. Double-noted, at that.

Hana looked down at herself, seeing the rumpled mess she’d been rolling around in, and was glad she didn’t have a mirror. “I look that good, huh?”

“You do, and I’m not buttering you up for nothing, but a shower always works wonders, so you let me know if and when you might want to borrow it. Though you might want to wait until…” She raised her eyes to the sky as she thought it over. “Oh, one to two hours from now before heading over. All of this adrenaline’s going to need a wonderful, limber outlet, and lucky for me I have one.”

Adelaide gave her a wink before walking away, her hips swaying all the while as she approached her house. Xander followed soon after once he caught both her direction – and the motion she used to beckon him to follow her - leaving both Hana and Sharky staring after them.

“Wow,” she said, trying to hide a grin. “I was not prepared.”

Sharky cleared his throat, the sound a little strangled. “Yeah. She’s the kind of person that inspires poetry and shit. Lots of it.”

“Poetry, eh? I can see that. Well, what do you say we take her advice and actually stop for a bit after we move the last of this shit back?” She tapped a nearby crate with the heel of her boot. “Though if I stop, there’s a good chance I’m just going to keel over where I’m standing, leaving me with my ass up in the air. Promise to drag me over to a less embarrassing spot if I do?”

“Drag, carry, either way the offer’s still open,” he said, helping her to lift the crate up to take to the garage. “Just gotta warn me first.”

“I did. And consider the offer open on both ends.”

That got a laugh. “Seriously, Dep?”

“I will drag your ass wherever, whenever, if it needs dragging. Don’t laugh, but there was a small period of time when I was thinking about being a firefighter too, and did the test, so…I could lug you around,” she said, giving him a playful grin. “Or just sweep you right off of your feet. I’d be gentle, promise.”

The crate slipped, both of them swearing heavily as she was left to juggle it while Sharky grabbed for it, and it fell right on the toe of Hana’s right boot. She shot right back, holding her foot up as she clenched her arms in front of her, and if she did let out an embarrassing sound, she wasn’t about to admit to it.

“Aw, oh fuck!” Sharky’s hands flew up, reaching for her. “Sorry Dep, I just-“

Hana held up a finger, her lips pinched shut as she hopped in place.

“But-“

“Nope,” she choked out, her foot now moving to the throbbing stage. “Just, give me a sec. I’ll just…walk over there, sit down, and we won’t talk about this.”

“You sure you don’t..?”

“No go, bud,” she said, grimacing. “Just let it go.”

His face fell as she limped away, and she tried not to think about the kick to the feelings that was as well.

Finding a spot in the back, she sat herself down onto a pallet by a set of stacked crates, and closed her eyes as she rested her back against one of them. She flexed her foot, testing it as she propped it up, and was glad that nothing felt broken. It was going to smart for a while, but she could deal with it.

If only she could just kick back for a few. And just…

Something touched her shoulder, giving her a gentle nudge. “Psst.”

“Hmm.”

It nudged her again, and this time she heard a voice. “Hey, chica? You still out?”

“Not out if I’m talking,” she grumbled. “Or actually understanding most of what you’re saying, Shark.”

She shifted, her hands reaching down to adjust how she was sitting only to feel something soft covering her legs. She opened her eyes, taking in the flowery throw covering her, and looked up at Sharky. He had two beers with him. One that he was currently taking a long drink from, and the other he held out when he noticed her eying it.

“God, what time is it?” Everything was dark, short of the fluorescent lights still on in the garage.

“Moon’s up, sun’s down, and we’re all still sober, so there’s plenty of night left to go.”

Hana’s whole body ached when she shifted, moving to get up. The place and the position she’d picked hadn’t done her any favors, but her foot wasn’t hurting, and the spotty sleep did leave her feeling more alert. She was also starting to eyeball the beer dangling from Sharky’s hand. Judging by the way he was waving it in front of her, she wasn’t being subtle about it either.

She took the beer, but didn’t open it. “You should’ve woken me up, man. I wanted to help clear more junk out, get in that shower, or do watch. Whichever.”

“Nah, you wanted to be left alone, and I didn’t wanna wake you up for nothing.” He shrugged and took another drink. “Beer-thirty, though? That’s something.”

“Hey, now. If you’re waking me up to get stuff done and then give me this,” she joked half-heartedly, “I don’t know how good of a help I’ll be mildly soused.”

“You can shoot a Peggie buzzed. I’ve shot a dozen while skating down one shithouse high after torching a bunch of their flowers. It was kinda cool, kinda weird watching three versions of myself kick ass like a movie within a movie, but semi-recommended, cause while there’s a chance it’ll kill you, you really can’t beat that shit.”

“So, I should be cool then?”

“Real fucking frosty.” His eyes lingered on her, before dropping down to her hands. “Uh, so you want help with that?”

Sharky pointed at her beer, the one she’d all but neglected.

“Sure,” she said, handing it over. He popped it open in record time, and Hana made sure to give him a small toast once he handed it back. “Cheers, and here’s to one hell of a long-ass day. Let it finally end.”

He snapped his fingers mid-drink, and swallowed the rest of the beer down with a cough. “Shit, almost forgot. Aunt Addie’s got food indoors, and I wanted to tell you about it before it disappears. She told me not to eat all of the chicken, but it’s been a while since I’ve had food that hasn’t come out of a wrapper or been three days past, and…you might wanna grab it while you can cause leftovers ain’t happening.”

Her stomach reacted accordingly, reminding her that like most people, she needed something solid to run on. Not just coffee, the occasional cigarette, and adrenaline spikes.

“You don’t have to tell me twice,” she said, pushing off to sprint towards the main house.

Sharky ran off with her, sticking close even with her head-start. She barely managed to beat him through the door to Adelaide’s, slipping through the doorway only to crash into Xander once inside.

He did beat her to the punch on the last drumstick, however. And seeing as that was a solid trade for what went down earlier, she didn’t complain about it one bit.

---

“Reports are stating that due to drought-like conditions hitting the eastern side of the state, farmers are yielding a third less of their wheat crop, leading to concerns about making ends meet. Costs to improve these conditions through increased irrigation may be too high for them to afford-“

Hana fiddled with the radio in her lap, counting to five before switching it to the other channel.

The music that drifted through was somber and without words, and she could only stand to listen to it for close to a minute before switching back.

“Hospitals are unable to meet the needs of patients, having to turn them away due to being understaffed-“

“Jesus.” She sighed, and set the radio down.

Sitting outside alone on the docks, she’d been unable to sleep after all, opting for watch instead. It’d been quiet – too quiet, and she’d tried not to feel guilty about it – and found herself looking for a distraction before long. Something other than staring down at the dark water below, any skipped stones she’d chucked sinking after two hops.

It was easier to keep her mind blank that way, but it drifted like it always did. Started asking questions about tomorrow that she still didn’t know the answers to, and wasn’t sure she wanted asked to begin with. The news only fed on that, reminding her that outside of this place the world was still running. Still struggling, and though there was a chance they could all manage to save this, it was a drop in the bucket to the rest of the world.

But this was her world now. Had been the moment she took the job. It needed her to pull through this. To care. To keep on pushing, like the others were.

But damn, if the bruises and aches weren’t adding up. She’d scored plenty of new ones after picking up Sharky at the trailer park, joining the others dotting her upper arms. They hadn’t even fully faded yet, and earlier she’d taken the time to count each and every one while staring into the mirror in Adelaide’s bathroom.

Eight. Nine, if she counted the odd mark on her lower back. That was a new record, not that her old one had been hard to break.

She rubbed the back of her neck, idly trying to ease more of the tension out that had settled there, and eventually gave up. Rest really was a luxury, and yet here she was. Taking five on the cusp of heading north straight towards another Seed.

Jacob she could only recall from what she’d read in Dutch’s bunker, and the little she’d seen of him that night at the compound. The blurred photograph and the short breakdown covered only the basics, much like with John and Faith.

He was the one that armed and trained the soldiers of Eden’s Gate, pushed people to turn on each other on a dime, and up in the Whitetail Mountains there were an infinite number of trails to use. Places to hide, and wait, and bide your time if he happened to be the patient kind.

What would he do once she managed to piss him off?

She was going to find out either way, but the uncertainty chafed. Made her hair want to stand on end. It hadn’t taken much effort to get John to step in. Faith had taken a more subtle route, though maybe that had just been the bliss talking. Not her, just a projection that the drug had fed her.

She’d call Dutch in the morning. He always had an ear to the ground, and had to have heard more. Maybe even heard something from up north that she wasn’t privy to yet. What would it hurt?

The rest was up to her. Well, Sharky and her…and Hurk, once they managed to get to him. It was going to turn into a proper party after that, and Jacob would surely come calling then.

The news ended after two more reports, switching to a tune that felt better suited to an old black and white romance flick. One where the two leads were so swept up in each other that little else mattered. It was fun to think about for a few seconds as she listened, trying to picture it.

Hana chucked one last rock far out across the water, watching as it skipped across the surface once, before disappearing.

And as the song went on, she couldn’t help humming along to it.

And I do, and I do.

There is no one else, only you.

Only you, bring me joy, my sweet lover boy.

#far cry 5 #far cry #deputy hana #sharky boshaw #adelaide drubman #fanfiction #this one's actually shorter for once #but I can already tell the next is going to be a doozy #fic series: you'll be okay I promise #FC5 fanfiction

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jinterlude · 6 years ago

Text

And So I Did...

↳ header is made by yours truly. I do not own the rights to the image used.

» Pairing: Choi Junhong x Reader (female OC)

» Genre(s): High School!AU, Friends turned Lovers Trope, Fluff, Friendship, Romance, & Slight-Angst

» Warning(s): low self-esteem // tiny hints of bullying // swearing

» Words: 4.6K

» Summary: You and Junhong. Two peas in a pod. You always have his back. He’ll always have yours. However, there has to be something going on between the two of you. After all, you know that saying, “a guy and a girl can’t be just friends”. Well, sorry to burst the bubble, but that’s all you two are. Just friends. Right?

To think it all starts with a simple phrase,

“Is this seat taken?”

Then, it evolves into a long-term friendship that no one expects. Two complete opposites have form a bond that nothing and no one dares break. You, this little meek girl, with your signature black thick rimmed glasses and hair in a high ponytail always believes that you are destined to be single for the rest of your life. Comparing to the other girls in your school, you consider yourself to be a negative fifteen while the others are in the hundreds. But a certain someone begs to differ. While you don’t know it, the person firmly believes that you’re incredibly breathtaking. Better than every single girl at school. You have this natural beauty that radiates warmth and happiness. You aren’t fake when it comes to your words and actions. You don’t sugar coat your feelings when you finally choose to lay it all out there. You’re just…you…and that’s why your best friend has fallen so hard in love with you to the point that he has to do something.

But what?

You have been friends since middle school that trying to get out of the good old “friend-zone” is quite impossible. Basically a challenge. However, that doesn’t stop him from trying. He always loves a challenge and never backs down from one.

It’s the start of a new school week, you, as always, have your nose buried in between the pages of your favorite book—Pride and Prejudice. God, you’re just enamored with the way Jane Austen words the obvious romantic tensions between two people. Both who come from different social backgrounds and allow said differences to cloud their judgments, preventing them from confessing their undying love for one another. What a great love story.

Turning the page, your eyes scan word after word, inching closer to your favorite scene throughout the entire book. The scene where Mr. Darcy first proposes to Miss Elizabeth. You’re absolutely captivated how – while he essentially insults her at first – he ends up telling how much he loves her and that he wants to marry her.

You wonder what you’d do if you’re in that type of situation. Ha. Like that’ll ever happen.

You flip the page as you internally squeal in delight. Alas…you’ve reached your favorite scene.

"In vain I have struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you." You mumble, shaking your head slightly as if you’re offended for Elizabeth. You continue on your little adventure, taking in each word and rooting for the fact that she doesn’t accepts his “beautiful” proposal.

“Seriously…who would accept his proposal?” You think out loud to yourself, chuckling softly.

“Well…apparently she does at the end of the novel,” You hear an all too familiar voice point out followed by the sound of a chair scraping against the tiled floors. The annoying squeak echoes throughout the library. You aren’t facing the check out desk, but you know that the library is giving you and your best friend, Choi Junhong, a dirty look.

A smile forms on your face as you lower your book and place your bookmark in between the pages. You close the book and place it aside.

You raise your brow, leaning against your chair, as you ask him what’s he doing in the library.

Junhong mimics your actions but has an interesting smirk painting his lips.

“What? I need a reason to hang out with my best friend in the library?” He asks, turning his head away.

“When it’s you? Yes. I would like a reason as to why you want to hang out with little old me when there’s a thousand of other girls who’d love your company.”

“I wish you stopped doing that.”

“Doing what?”

“Comparing yourself to irrelevant pebbles whenever I’m with you.”

You stifle your laughter, “pebbles?” You question with an amused gleam in your eyes.

“Beside the point! I don’t want to hang out with anyone but you.” He says, close to spilling his hidden adoration for you.

“Okay. Okay. No need to be all extra.” You tell him, holding your hands up in surrender.

Junhong smiles in victory, uttering a quick, “good”, before the two of you begin talking about everything and anything that comes to mind. You guys do have time to kill before the first bell rings. You guys talk about the latest episode of your shared favorite show. Then, it eventually becomes a heated battle over which “ship” is better. You’re on team “Ray x Nora” while Junhong’s stupidly on team “Constantine x Nora” which by the way makes no sense. You even go into great lengths to letting your idiotic best friend know that.

Rolling his eyes, Junhong too pulls out evidence on why Nora is meant to be with John Constantine. You, on the other hand, refutes his claims, citing that she only saves the Legend’s resident magic dictionary because she wants to prove that she’s good.

“Oh, come on shorty! It’s painfully obvious that Nora is slowly falling in love with Constantine!” shouts Junhong, though, careful to make sure that the librarian doesn’t shush you guys.

You gawk, “Excuse me, you stupid string bean, but she only does it for Ray. If it wasn’t for him, then she wouldn’t have gone aboard the Legend’s ship!”

Junhong purses his lips; his eyes narrow on you. Secretly, he’s only arguing with you because not only amuses him, but he personally loves seeing passionately arguing about something. That’s one trait he absolutely loves. Well, he loves second. The first is how loyal and caring you are. He honestly can’t remember a time when you aren’t there for him whenever he desperately needs you the most. Then, a goofy smile graces his face as your argument fades into the background while he recalls the moment, he has fallen in love with you…

It’s been raining nonstop. The winds have been harsh. Branches falling from the trees every five seconds. It doesn’t help that the rain has become heavy after each boom that followed each lightning strike.

He doesn’t even know where this stupid storm came from. One moment it’s quite beautiful. The sun is shining. The skies are this breathtaking blue with gigantic white puffs of clouds that moved with the Earth’s rotation. Well…it moves because of the winds, but that’s beside the point. It goes from a nice spring day to a dramatic scene from a romantic-drama movie.

Trying his hard to get out of the harsh conditions, Junhong uses his skateboard as cover. Though, it’s essentially pointless as he’s drenched from head to toe. He looks as if he just jumped into the community pool with his clothes and shoes on. That’s how soaked he currently is.

“Fuck…” He curses, unaware of what time it is or even where he is. He can pull out his phone but with the current weather conditions, he’ll unintentionally destroy it and will have to revert back to his prehistoric, flip phone.

Releasing this long, defeated sigh, Junhong squints his eyes, surveying his surroundings. He says a silent prayer, hoping that someone – anyone – would come to his aid.

His head hangs low as he feels close to giving up. Maybe he’s doomed to catch pneumonia and then more than likely die from it.

“Jell-O?” His ears perk up. He recognizes your voice. Your oh-so-melodious voice. Wait a minute. What are you doing out in this stormy weather? He quickly whips around; drops of water flinging away from his locks of hair.

His eyes widen. He practically beams at the sight of you.

“Short cake!” He shouts, running up to you, taking coverage under your umbrella.

You smile warmly, holding your sturdy umbrella higher, so it shields the two of you.

“Why the Hell are you out in this awful weather?”

“I could ask you the same thing, Y/N? Why are you out here?”

“Well…I noticed a familiar face standing outside my house, and he looked quite frankly miserable and lost.”

Junhong makes a face, mumbling something along the lines of, “I wasn’t lost…”

You shoot him a knowing look, finding it a bit amusing that your best friend of two years refuses to admit when he’s in trouble. That boy. What will you do with him?

“I don’t know…love me forever and perhaps get me some dry clothes to wear?” Your body flinches. Your eyes trail up, meeting his puppy like stare. A faint blush penetrates your cheeks. Not because you have a crush on him but because of how close he is. Yeah. It’s only because he’s extremely close to you. And that’s it. Nothing more.

So why’s your heart racing like you just ran a marathon?

Choosing to ignore your rather confusing feelings, you guide Junhong into your house, shouting to your parents that he’s hanging out until the storm subsides enough for him to go home. You lead him upstairs, down a hallway, and stopping in front of your older brother’s room. You instruct Junhong to wait outside while you raid your brother’s closet. The joys of him attending a college out-of-state. You have free reign over his room.

Minutes later, you come out with a pair of black sweats and a plain white t-shirt. You hand the clothes over to your drenched guy friend and direct him to the bathroom. You then tell him to meet you in your bedroom once he’s done.

His intrigued gaze almost burns a hole on the back of your head as his eyes can’t help but trail downward. His stare becomes fixated with the way your hips move. How incredibly sexy you look sauntering away from him.

The hormonal teenage boy releases a long, heavy sigh as he musters every single unsexy thought. He thinks about how his friend Daehyun looks funny when he stuffs his face. How his cheeks puff out whenever he takes a big bite out of his hamburger. Like how your cheeks bubble whenever you fight against your better judgment when it comes to facing the queen bee of your school. Wait…that’s not what he’s supposed to be thinking about.

“Come on, Junhong…think about something else…” He chants repeatedly. His fingers graze over the soft fabric of both the sweatpants and shirt. “There we go. Focus on the softness of her brother’s clothes. How smooth it feels against your callused fingers. Like how Y/N’s delicate skin felt against your hands when she accidentally toppled over you while trying to ride your skateboard…Oh, God damn it!” Once again, he fails. Maybe his friends are right. He has a crush on you and while he can’t have said feelings in fear that your friendship will sever once you find out, he can’t help it. He’s the victim of the wonderful cliché of “falling in love with your best friend”.

Fuck. His. Life.

Sighing in defeat, he finally heads to the bathroom to get out of his uncomfortable, clingy, drenched clothes. Though, his mind drifts off to you, wondering what you’re doing. Yet he has an inkling. You’re more than likely reading one of your favorite books. Just like he always observes you doing whenever he and friends trek around your neck of the woods.

Wow. He sounds like an obsessed stalker.

Turning the page, you remain focus on what the great William Shakespeare has to say about the famous star-crossed lovers. You, yourself, are a mere stranger to love, that doesn’t stop you from reading about it. Though, your mom has wondered why you never pursue it. She can never know that you’re left traumatized after your first and last attempt. A few weeks ago, Junhong motivated you enough to confess your feelings to the school’s resident heartthrob, Kim Seokjin. Up until the verbal confession, you have left sweet, innocent love notes in his locker, dropping hints as to his secret admirer is. And on the day the two of you met face-to-face, the disappointment in his eyes will forever be a nightmare in your dreams. His cruel words piercing both your heart and soul.

“Wow. I was honestly expecting someone hotter but obviously has a great mind because of the words written on those notes. But then I get this ugly, plain looking girl. Man…why do I always attract the wall-flower types?”

Since that day, you have grown to fear love for yourself. You want others to experience it or witness it, but you will never experience it yourself. You refuse to have your heartbroken again.

Feeling a tear cascade down your cheek, you quickly wipe it away, not wanting Junhong to see you cry pathetically over someone. Someone who’s not worthy of them.

You take a moment to compose yourself before turning the page. Good thing that you did because you hear his voice cite the famous line,

“But, soft! what light through yonder window breaks?

It is the east, and Y/N is the sun.”

You quickly cover your mouth – even though the book’s already covering your face – stifling the laughter that erupts from your chest. Though, it only fuels him to continue—especially after seeing your hand covering your mouth.

“See, how she leans her cheek upon her hand!

O, that I were a glove upon that hand,

That I might touch that cheek!”

Not wanting to hear him butcher “Romeo & Juliet” any longer, you set your book down and reach for your pillow. Without a warning, you chuck at him, hoping that it hits him. Sadly, it doesn’t. Curse his fast reflexes.

Junhong grabs the pillow and makes his way towards you, smiling brightly.

“O, speak again, bright angel! for thou art

As glorious to this night, being o'er my head

As is a winged messenger of heaven…” He says softly. His gaze piercing your own.

You can swear that your heart has skipped a beat. What is this boy doing to you? Lately, he’s been shamelessly flirting with you. It’s quite odd to be honest.

“Okay, Romeo. What do you want?”

“You, my precious Juliet. Tis you that is making me spout nonsense. My heart is sure to burst if I do not find a cure soon.”

You perk a brow up, “And what cure is that I pray you tell me?”

“Accompany me to the ball of the homecoming.”

“Junhong, you know I can’t do that.”

“Oh…we’re dropping our Shakespeare speak? Dang it, I was hoping to keep it going.” Junhong crawls his lengthy self over to you, leaning against the wall. “But why won’t you go to the dance? Is it because of He who-shall-not-be-named?” questions he as he looks at you with utter concern.

Your eyes become wet forcing you to muster a quick smile and crack a joke about not wanting to dance with Lord Voldemort. Unfortunately, Junhong doesn’t buy it. He knows you better than you know yourself. He’s been your companion long enough to know all your signals. When you’re furious with something or someone. When you’re about to laugh uncontrollably. Even when you’re about to cry. You either force a smile and jokingly say something or your lips quiver and your eyes look away. Then, it’s followed by unnecessary tears. He deems them unnecessary because no one shall have the luxury of knowing that you’re shedding tears over them. No. He wants you to hold your head up high and show those assholes that you’re an unbothered queen.

And…it just breaks his heart knowing that he can’t prevent them swift enough.

Without a second thought, he wraps a warm around you and forces you close. Your tear streaked cheek presses against his broad chest. Then, you begin to sob. Just that one friendly gesture is enough for you to break down, releasing the pent-up sadness and frustrations.

“Y/N…” He begins softly. The corners of his mouth turn up. “You, my amazing friend, need to stop releasing tears for men who are too dumb to realize what they are missing.” He says sincerely, gently using his thumb to wipe away your tears. He observes your silence and then places his index finger underneath your damp chin. He tilts your head towards him. Your gazes bore right into each other’s.

“I’m serious. I’m not telling you this because I’m your friend. I’m spouting these things because I want you to realize your worth as a person. Specifically, how beautiful you are.” He confesses with a full-blown blush invading his cheeks.

Your stubbornness refuses to give in. A short scoff escapes your lips in response. He’s obviously blind. You’re not beautiful nor will you ever be. You’ve seen the type of girls he flirts with. You’re nothing in comparison. And you have no shame in letting him know that.

Then, out of nowhere, he grabs your face. His hands cupping your cheeks. His forehead practically presses against yours.

“Will you please stop that?! You have no idea how much it hurts me to hear you put yourself down like that? And for what? Because of some stupid ass prick who doesn’t even know what he’s missing? You are worth of being loved. You are worth every compliment that myself or the rest of our friends have given you. Please…Why can’t you believe that I’m being sincere…genuine…when I tell how gorgeous you are?”

You remain quiet. Your bottom lip almost disappearing as you nibble on it. You don’t want to cry again after you’ve stopped a few seconds ago.

How did you get so lucky to have someone so dedicated to you?

How did you get the honor of having Junhong as your best friend?

You will never know…

After what seems like forever, you remove his hands from your face. Then, a warm yet soft smile graces your face.

“Thanks, Jell-O. I needed to hear that.”

“Anytime short cake. I’ll forever be at your service to slap you with the harsh truth.”

Ever since he had the opportunity of seeing your vulnerable side, his admiration has grown tenfold. Since that day, he has made a vow to make sure you never shed a tear again. You’re always caring and loyal to him, so why not return the favor?

Question is…how? How can he return the favor? Then, as if it’s a sign from Gods of Romance, he hears a few giggly girls gossip about who’s taking them to the upcoming dance.

“Bingo.” He thinks before tuning in back to the conversation, “Say, shorty. You don’t have a date to the dance, right?” He inquires.

You look at him oddly, “No. Why?”

“Good. You and I are going.”

“Wouldn’t it be weird to take your friend to a love theme dance?”

He bitterly thinks, “Crush but alright…” before responding that he has seen others take their friends all the time. It’s not that big of a deal.

You hum in response, thinking about his explanation. He has a point. Shit. Even your brother has taken his lady friend to a dance, so it’s not weird. Though, granted, he wound up dating her afterwards, but that’s beside the point.

“Okay fine. I’ll be your date to the dance, but if something goes horribly wrong, I am punching you in the dick and never speaking to you again.”

“Fair enough.”

In a blink of an eye, it’s the night of the dance. You, wearing a pastel blue short dress, currently wait for Junhong by the main entrance. You clutch your satin white wrap around your bare shoulders, hoping that it’ll keep you chattering your teeth any longer.

You glance in both directions, smiling politely at your fellow classmates. Airy chuckles leave your lips here and there as you find it quite hilarious that you’re being acknowledged by the people who have ridiculed you. You even got a few compliments by former crushes. Your lips curve upwards as you amusingly think about what will happen if you break out your signature glasses. Will these assholes act the same?

“Looking for someone?” You hear someone ask. And speaking of asshole. You focus your attention towards his direction. Yup. There he stands. Kim Seokjin.

“I’m actually waiting for someone. Thank you, though.” You kindly reply, smiling sweetly, masking the underlying hatred you feel towards him.

Seokjin simply smiles. That smug smile he always wear. Why did you ever have a crush on him? God. A moment of stupidity. He suddenly wraps an arm around your shoulders.

“Well, how about I keep you warm until he comes?”

“Or how about you let go of me since you, and I quote, ‘do not like plain, wall-flower looking types of girls’?”

The look on his face is priceless. His eyes widen. A look of utter dread wash over him as he scans your body up and down. No way. This can’t be the nerd he rejected a two years ago?

Damn…you clean up nicely…

“Well, that’s before I knew you could look quite breathtaking.”

“Sorry. I don’t take empty compliments from arrogant pricks like you.”

Seokjin becomes taken back. Not because he’s called a prick since he’s been called worse but by the fact that you suddenly have a backbone.

Kind of hot actually.

“Come on. Don’t be like that. I promise, I’ll make it up to you.”

That’s it. He’s slowly severing the last string that holds your sanity. Just as you open your mouth, someone else beats you to it.

“Or, how about I punch you right in your fucking smug face if you don’t release my date?”

Choi fucking Junhong. That best friend of yours always has wonderful timing.

Seokjin stares him down. His jaw tightens. Then, he backs suddenly backs off.

He utters a quick, “Whatever…” before disappearing inside the decorated gymnasium. He isn’t about to be jumped by Junhong’s older friends.

Junhong, on the other hand, is blissfully unaware that his friends were right behind him before going inside themselves. He smiles in victory. This sense of pride surges throughout his veins. He honestly feels that he can do anything.

Maybe he should…

Before his confidence evaporates into thin air and taking advantage of the fact that the entire body are currently inside the lively gym, he decides it’s time to confess to you. Until tonight, he has been rehearsing with both his friends and mom on what to say. You deserve the perfect confession, so he has revised his speech until it’s deemed worthy.

Now, all what’s left to do is execute it. He just hopes he doesn’t mess it up.

“Y/N, before we go inside, can I tell you something?”

“Sure. What’s on your mind?”

Damn your warm smile. Why do you have to smile at him like that? Now, his mind is muddled mess and all the rehearsing he has done has gone to waste.

“Okay. Okay. Just say what’s in your heart.” He chants mentally, calming his frenzied nerves. He takes a deep breath, releasing it nice and slow. Then, he takes your hands, taking note of how frozen they must be. He lifts them up to his lips and breathes warm air on them. He then rubs them in between his hands, creating friction in hopes to transfer his body heat to you.

“Warm?”

You nod, thanking him for warming up your almost frost-bitten hands. In which, Junhong argues that it’s not cold enough outside for you to experience frost-bite, so your response is invalid.

“And you call me a nerd?”

“Well, you are a nerd, but you’re my nerd.”

His comment catches you off guard. You feel a warm sensation creep on you slowly.

“Very funny. Okay. Let’s go inside. I want to see your awesome dance moves.” You tell him, pivoting your body away from his. And just as you take a step towards the gym, you feel a pair of arms around your shoulders. Then, something heavy on your shoulder.

“J-Junhong…what are you doing?”

“Throwing four days’ worth of rehearsals and winging it.”

“Come again?”

“You know the saying that you should date someone who’s like your best friend?”

You nod as forming a coherent sentence is impossible right now. The only thing your mind can focus on is your racing heart and sporadic breathing.

Junhong smiles, pressing his cheek against yours, “Well, I thought to myself…why date someone who’s like your best friend when I can just date my best friend?” He says, turning you around so now that your chests touch one another. His face tilting towards you. Adoration glows in his eyes. But why’s he looking at you like how your dad stares at your mom?

Oh…OH!

“You have a crush on me?!” You shriek. Your eyes widening to the size of dinner plates. Your mouth falling open.

Junhong laughs at your cute reaction.

“Yes, shorty. I, Choi Junhong, am head over in heels in love with my best friend.”

“You love me?!”

“Well, you don’t have to shout it like that…”

“But. But. But.”

“Yes, I do have a cute butt. And, as my girlfriend, you have daily access to it.”

You shake your head firmly, refusing his confession with every fiber of your being. Not because you don’t return his feelings. Oh, how you do, but your lingering fears are besting you right now.

You fake a convincing smile, but Junhong knows better. How long have you guys been friends now? Almost five years. You need to try harder.

“What’s so bad about being my girlfriend? Don’t tell me you like that arrogant twat!”

“Are you kidding me? He didn’t like me when I was a mess, so what makes you think he deserves me at my best?”

Junhong grins and chuckles, “Okay good because for a second there, I was worried.”

Now, it’s your turn to chuckle.

“Don’t worry, string bean. You never have to worry about me crushing on other guys when I’ll forever keep comparing them to you.” You accidentally confess. Realizing what has come out of your mouth, the color drains from your face. You quickly cover your face, berating yourself for revealing one of your most hidden secrets.

Junhong beams, loving this newly found information.

“So…you compare potential boyfriends to me?”

“Oh, don’t act like you haven’t done that with potential girlfriends.”

“Never denied that I didn’t, princess.”

You can’t help but groan, questioning him what exactly is going on between the two of you.

Junhong shrugs, “Well, I’m trying to convince you that we should be more than best friends, but you’re being quite stubborn.”

You gawk, “I am not being stubborn!”

“Yes, you are, woman!”

“If I am, then would I say, ‘yes, I would love to be your girlfriend?’!”

Junhong smirks and says, “Finally”, before cupping your cheeks and pulling you in for a kiss.

To say that you’re currently experiencing fireworks will be quite the understatement. You honestly feel more than that.

You just feel happy.

The two of you pull away, though, your foreheads remain touching. Goofy grins appear on your faces as you guys simply enjoy the moment. Who needs to be sandwiched by a bunch of sweaty people?

“Do you want to skip the dance?”

“You’ve read my mind.”

“Well, we have been friends since middle school, so it’s only natural that I’m your personal mind reader.”

“And you’ve ruined it…”

“Also, part of my job description.”

You and Junhong bicker back and forth until he captures your lips once more. He pours every ounce of love he has developed for you over the years. He’ll never grow tire of your sweet lips.

“Thank you for agreeing to be my girlfriend.”

“Well, you did say why should I date someone who’s like my best friend when I can simply date you.”

“That I did. That I did."

A/N: I am ashamed that I haven’t released anything new for my soulmate ;-; how dare I not give this man all my love and attention? I am a disgrace! But in all seriousness, in honor of B.A.P celebrating their seventh anniversary of debuting, I thought...why not write a one shot about my no.1 ultimate bias, Choi Junhong! Can’t wait to celebrate more years with you and the rest of B.A.P! #FOREVERWI7HBAP

Don’t forget to leave a comment/like/reblog/a message in my inbox! I love hearing your thoughts! :)

- Kim

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jamesbvck · 6 years ago

Text

change your mind | six

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader (Modern AU, High School!Bucky) Summary: Senior Year: the last year to be a somebody or a nobody. A chance to fall in love, ace that final exam and make memories. After a terrible first impression, Bucky makes it his mission to fix the mistake he made with the new girl. Will they get their chance? Warnings: swearing, more cliche high school things, flashbacks A/N: hi! since january was only three days, there are some flashbacks to random days in january! feedback is encouraged :)

CYM MASTERLIST | PREVIOUS | NEXT

There were moments when you were on cloud nine; moments that your heart soared and your stomach was swarmed with fluttering butterflies. And then there were other times when you were second guessing everything. There was still slight hesitation and reservations that you had with Bucky and sometimes you wanted to pull the plug and call off...whatever you two were anyway. There weren’t any major red flags but there were still times when you could convince yourself that Bucky wasn’t the right guy for you, that somewhere along the line everything would just crumble. It had barely been a month and you knew that was nothing.

Your classes had changed up for the new semester and you didn’t have any classes with Bucky. He had a free period and moved his schedule around so he could sleep in during first which was pretty smart. But it was okay. You had another class with Steve which was math, and you shared fourth period co-ed gym with Clint and Sam which already proven to be quite the adventure. Those two could be amusing to hang around, especially when you’d turn to run a third lap of the gym with sweat beading down your forehead and on the verge of collapsing, and Clint offers to piggyback you around for the next two laps. Your gym teacher, Mr Lang, really didn’t seem to care much. He always had coffee and some sort of snack with him and half assed the class. It was going to be a breeze.

You did miss history class with Bucky, though. Not so much Mr Pierce, but just the routine of the morning and Bucky annoyingly prodding you with his pencil. It wasn’t all bad, even though he had first period free, he’d get up and drive you to school when it was super snowy. You had told him it wasn’t necessary but Bucky was Bucky and would be at your front door fifteen minutes before school started. Sometimes Becca would be in the backseat, eagerly waving from the window.

Homework dates seemed to be a more frequent thing. Bucky would come over after school and you’d both sit with the TV on, eat some snacks and do homework. Those times would start off with homework but sometimes you’d both find yourself on the couch a little less interested in fundamental learning.

Bucky’s phone had been vibrating nonstop for the last thirty minutes. He’d pick it up and feverishly reply back, setting it face down on the coffee table. You nonchalantly peaked at him as he sat on the couch and you were on the floor with your own work. His brows were tightly knit together and face contoured with discontent.

“Bucky, what’s wrong?” You set your pencil down in your math textbook, rotating yourself to face him.

He shook his head. “Nothing.”

“It’s obviously not nothing,” you countered. “You’ve been working on the same question for a half hour, I don’t even think you’ve written anything new down.”

Bucky sighed deeply, dropping his own pen down and leaned back on the couch. He rubbed the side of his chin as you got up and took the open cushion next to him. “My dad was supposed to come back from a work trip tonight but I guess he decided to fly from Sacramento to Dallas instead for something else.”

“How long has he been away for?”

“A week? Haven’t really countdown the days since I was thirteen. He’s going to miss Julia’s little play at school on Thursday and he was supposed to be at Abby’s parent-teacher interview.”

You got the sense that Bucky’s father seemed to be more absent than not. It made you wonder how Winifred handled four kids on her own, but you supposed none of them were babies and they could all manage to help each other out. It had been just you and your mother for a while and you grew up a little fast having to fend for yourself. You really couldn’t imagine how it must have been a few years ago when everyone was younger and their father went away for a long period of time. Sure, he was providing for the family but family was important too.

“My dad got me into football, right. Well, my dad and my uncle and they taught Steve and I how to play. Dad and I would throw around the ball in the backyard until it was dark. At first it was just for fun then I started to really love it, and I worked hard at it. He’d take me to every youth league practice and game, and if I had a shit game he’d say there’s nothing wrong with trying your best.”

Bucky was rambling and you let him. It sounded like he needed to get some things off his chest anyway and you wouldn’t interrupt him.

“But then Steve’s mom would have to drive me, or I’d have to figure out a way to get there because my mom was taking care of my sisters. My dad got a promotion at the tech company he works for in the city and he started flying around. It was cool for a bit but then he stopped coming to games,” Bucky took a second to breathe. “I did a six week training camp last summer. It was thirty minutes away in Warrior Falls so I’d either have to bus or sometimes Clint or Steve would drive me. Came home one night and there was that Jeep in the driveway and my dad handed me the keys. We didn’t say anything, he just pat my shoulder and went back into the house.”

It was quiet for a few moments. You knew you probably didn’t need to say anything, that simply letting Bucky vent for a minute was enough. His phone vibrated again. You reached over and handed it to him seeing Becca’s name flash across the screen with an eye roll emoji. It wasn’t just affecting Bucky but his sisters, too. Sure, perhaps Bucky and Becca weren’t surprised by it but it wasn’t fair to Julia and Abby who were younger. Bucky cleared the message and set his phone aside.

“I’m sorry.” He apologized.

You blinked in confusion. “For what? You didn’t do anything wrong.”

Bucky shrugged. His arm went around the back of the couch and pulled you into his side. He didn’t reply and you didn’t focus on an explanation. But there was the pattern of Bucky seemingly apologizing for nothing sometimes, pre-preventing himself from being some sort of bad guy which you had grown to learn he was rather the opposite. You rested into him, closing your eyes. Homework could wait.

You wandered to your locker after your sleepy first period class. You weren’t too into world geography but it wasn’t the worst class ever. A girl that was in your history class was in this class and you sat beside her, she was nice. The hallways were decorated with cut out hearts and pink and white streamers. There were bistol board signs with large, bold lettering indicating that Valentine’s Day was fast approaching. You could send candy grams and/or roses to your crush or friends. You stopped by one of the tables in the main foyer and forked over ten dollars to get six, one for each of your friends.

You took them with you to your locker having decided on to personalize them for each person. You stuck them into your notebook and retrieved your math book. A tingle shot up your back as a gentle hand touched your waist. Your eyes flickered to your left seeing Bucky with a pink nose from the cold and the black beanie situated on his head was dusted with snow. He was still dressed for the outdoors having not been to his locker yet.

“It’s fucking cold.” Bucky sniffed.

“Maybe you should invest in an actual winter jacket,” you said, brushing the snow off the shoulders of his lettermans jacket. “And I don’t know, maybe a scarf? Gloves? Proper winter garments?”

Bucky rolled his eyes. “You sound like my mother.”

“Don’t come crying to me when you get sick.”

He smiled cheekily. You closed your locker and began the daily routine of Bucky walking you to second period as it was by his end of the school. Your hand bumped against his cold one as you strolled, Bucky telling you about how his dad has gotten home late last night. Apparently breakfast had been quiet, only mouths chewing and his father, George, reading the morning paper. Winifred had made a stack of pancakes, bacon, and eggs.

You gave Bucky a half smile. At least his dad was home for a few days, that was something.

You stopped at your math room, turning to face Bucky. “Guess I’ll see you at lunch. Think pizza’s on the menu today.”

“Pizza’s always on the menu.” He chuckled.

“Hats off, Mr Barnes.” Mr Pym was on a mission as he walked by with his briefcase and a stack of papers in hand. But he still had time to make sure students followed the code of conduct.

Bucky pulled off his beanie, “Sorry, sir.” He replied, waiting until Pym was around the corner. Bucky took his hat and neatly adjusted it so it was perfectly slouching on the crown of your head. “Looks better on you anyway.”

You reached up to touch the wool and smiled. “If I get in trouble it’s going to be your fault.”

“You won’t. I promise, only the elderly care about the hat rule.”

The bell rang causing other kids to scurry to their next class. Bucky was already going to be late to his English class. Bucky leaned forward and pressed a quick kiss to your cheek. Your insides tangled with a fuzzy feeling. He waved and you wiggled your fingers back, slipping into the classroom. Steve trailed into the room with his backpack on his shoulder, taking up the seat next to you.

“You into beanies now?” He asked, unzipping his bag.

You smiled to yourself. “Maybe so.”

“Looks familiar, think I’ve seen it before.” You could hear the teasing in Steve’s voice.

A blush crept onto your cheeks, shaking your head as you flipped open to a fresh lined page in your notebook. Maybe you were into more than just the beanie.

You spent the entire class half paying attention and half doodling on the candy gram cards. You finished five out of the six, unsure of what to write on Bucky’s. It didn’t need to be anything serious. You tapped your eraser against the top of the desk with the bell drawing you out of your thoughts. You glanced over at Steve as he was closing his books and stuck his pencil behind his ear.

“Coming to lunch, or are you going to endure another round of math?” Steve grinned.

“I don’t even know what the lesson was today.” You admitted, getting out of your chair.

Steve slung his bag over his shoulder. “Maybe that beanie’s on too tight.”

You knocked shoulders with him as you exited the classroom and headed to your lockers. Peggy stood beside your locker since her Economics class was just a few doors down. She waved with a grand smile on her face.

“Heard a rumour in class today.” Peggy said.

“What kind of rumours swirl around Econ? How the American economy is collapsing? That’s nothing new.” You spun your padlock and unlocked your locker, shoving your books up on the top shelf. You took Peggy’s to store in there for now, too.

“No— well, yes— But these girls in the back of the class were gossiping like they usually do,” she started walking after you got your wallet and closed up your locker. “Apparently one of them is working the candy gram station and said Bucky stopped by and bought a pretty penny’s worth of the roses to send out.”

You arched a brow at Peggy. “That’s the hot gossip?”

She shrugged and laughed. “It is when you’re not the girl receiving them. Right, Nat?” Peggy called out to Natasha who was waiting by the stairs. She glanced up from her phone. “Roses are a big deal around here.” Peggy repeated.

Natasha rolled her eyes. “They’re flowers. You can buy them at the grocery store.”

“It’s the thought that counts.” Peggy beamed, practically skipping into the cafeteria.

“Steve’s sent her a rose every year,” Natasha walked alongside you. “Can’t even imagine what gushy thing he’ll do this time.”

You laughed, shaking your head. At least they were actually a couple this time around. Steve was already in line with Sam. Peggy squeezed her way in between them with Steve’s arm going around her as an automatic response to her presence. You and Natasha stood behind some freshmen girls in line who were whispering (and failing) about Steve and Sam. You snickered to yourself as they chatted about how attractive both boys were with Natasha sighing loudly with a short laugh.

It was a short wait before you grabbed your pizza and a carton of chocolate milk, heading to your usual table. You pulled out a chair and bellied yourself up against the table, beginning to eat. Clint and Bucky joined with cold air rolling off their bodies from the bitter outside weather. The smell of smoke stuck to their clothes and you wonder how in the hell they could stand outside in such frigid conditions. Bucky slung his arm around the back of your chair as he drove into a conversation with Steve. Contently you listened and munched on your cheesy pizza, eyes lingering around the room.

You stopped on Connie four tables over. She had a straw biting between her teeth as she sipped on ginger ale, and she was staring directly at you. Her face was scornful and you feared looking at her too long would turn you to stone. You blinked your gaze away, mindlessly adjusting Bucky’s beanie on your head.

It wasn’t a topic that you wanted to bring up. Hell, you didn’t want to talk about it ever. And you certainly didn’t want to bring it up at the championship party for the Valhalla Panthers. They were now crowned five-time New York State champions after their defeat over Xander High. The atmosphere had been electrifying with the crowd storming the field. Truly it was one of the most exhilarating moments you had ever witnessed. You mooned over the fact that they had won.

But there was a speed bump in the way of the right direction and you had to get over it. The low feeling had been eating at you ever since you walked into the party. You weren’t sure whose house this was but it was crammed with people and the trophy was on full display in the living room of the house. This wasn’t the right place with drinks flowing and thick air circulating. Your phone was clinched in your hand, vibrating twice with a new text message. You turned it over with the screen lighting up seeing Bucky’s name and him asking if you had arrived yet. You didn't need any direction to find him. You could hear Clint’s laughter from the kitchen off around the corner and you knew he’d be somewhere over there. Sure, enough he was.

Bucky leaned against the kitchen counter with a beer in hand and a childish grin on his lips. He looked so elated and slightly relieved. Sam was perched up on the island shoving his hand into a bag of Doritos and Steve was humbled by it all. You put on your happy face because truthfully you were and weaved through until you got to Bucky. One of his arms went around your shoulders in a half hug and you pressed yourself to his chest, wrapping your arms around his waist.

“We won!” He whispered against the side of your head.

“I know, Buck,” You laughed softly. “I’m happy for you.”

You pulled back slightly feeling a few nerves build up in the pit of your stomach. You looked up at Bucky whose thrilled expression transitioned into one of concern. Clearly your face was giving away more than you had hoped.

“What’s wrong?” He asked. You were mute and instead took his hand to bring him to another room, one more quiet and vacant. “Hey-- did something happen?”

You sighed, leaving the door to a small room open. “I really should just wait until tomorrow but I can’t and I don’t want to ruin your big night.”

Bucky’s brow pulled together. “You’re not going to ruin my night. I’d honestly rather be sitting in Clint’s basement with my friends and you rather than be here.”

You smiled briefly, wrapping your arms around your frame. “Some girls sitting behind Peggy, Nat and I at the game were talking about you and saying shit like how you cheated on Connie with me. Peggy told me to ignore it but it’s kind of hard too. I know we’re just figuring this out still but… Were you dating Connie when I started here?”

Bucky visibly became uncomfortable with the conversation and you wanted to take back everything you had just said to him. His fingers combed through the front of his hand as his weight shifted from leg to leg. “No. We’ve never… dated. Not really.”

“Not really?”

He sighed. “Connie’s liked me since the tenth grade, and yeah I kinda liked her back for a while too but we’ve never actually dated. We’d hang out and stuff but the more I’d hang out the more I knew we wouldn’t really work out. She kind of became a person I went to when I wanted to be alone but not totally.”

Your arms moved up to fold across your chest, a firm line forming on your lips. You didn’t know Bucky two years ago, you didn’t know anything.

“Did you talk to her about your dad?” You asked.

“Sometimes.” He shrugged. You nodded. “I told her in November that I didn’t think we should really hang out anymore. Didn’t really give her a reason but she was smart enough to figure out why.”

You were the why.

“Nat said that the only reason she wants to be with you is because she thinks you’re going to go pro.” You told him.

Bucky chuckled. “She did suddenly get very into football when we started talking,” his head shook. “What did she say to you on New Years? You never told me.”

You bit the inside of your cheek, debating on whether to spill it or not. Did that part even matter? You had faith in you and Bucky. “She said you’ll get easily bored with girls like me. I’ve got your attention now but give it another week and you’ll crawl your way back to her.”

Bucky’s head was shaking frantically. “No. I’m not--” He paused, humming lowly. He took a few steps towards you. “That’s not going to happen. She’s trying to get under your skin.”

“Kinda worked. I ignored you for most of the night.”

“I don’t want to be with Connie, you know that, right?” You nodded, leaning back against the wall. “I’m sorry.”

“You apologize a lot.” You murmured, taking his hand and laced your fingers together. “I just… don’t want her to cause a problem.”

“She won’t. I promise.” Bucky gave a half smile. You matched his smile and nodded. He lifted your chin a little higher, lips locking in a soft kiss. You let go of his hand, arms wrapping around his neck to pull him closer to you.

Thursdays typically dragged on for what seemed like forever. You weren’t sure why but it always seemed like the clock ticked a little slower. It was a struggle to keep your eyes open in geography and more often than not your head bobbed in a short snooze. The bell was your indicator to move on to your next class. Everyone seemed rather giddy since it was Valentine’s Day. Truthfully you never understood the commercialized holiday (plus it wasn’t even a true holiday where you got the day off), but it made people smile so it was something to someone.

You and Bucky had agreed not to do anything, at least nothing big. You had sent him a candy gram along with your friends, but that was something small and lighthearted. Student council was handing out treats in the main area and there was a bake sale going on throughout the day. You grabbed a pink cupcake along the way to math, humming as you went. Steve was already in his seat with a brownie.

“It’s the day of love, Steven.” You mused.

He chuckled. “So I’ve been told. This little girl that lives across the street from me went up and down our road giving every family a Valentine card and brownies this morning.”

That had to be one of the sweetest things you had ever heard. You smiled and set your books down, unwrapping the liner of your cupcakes and took a bite. It was plain vanilla but still tasty. Peggy had been preparing all week for her date with Steve. Apparently there was a new exhibit in the MET that Peggy had been hinting at to the point where Clint told Steve to buy her tickets so she’d shut up about it. It worked. So Peggy had you over almost every night to help her pick the right outfit which ended up being the one she had tried on the Monday night.

Math was more of a catch up period as there had been a substitute in for the last two days. You idly worked on the assigned questions in your textbook, some kids didn’t do anything and were on their phones or talking about anything but math. There was a knock on the door and the kid in the front of the class got up to answer it. Two student council members walked in both wearing pink shirts. The girl was holding a basket of candy grams and the boy had a handful of roses in his hand. They began going around the classroom and gave out the gifts.

Steve got a few. There was one from Peggy, of course, the one from you which he laughed at, and two secret admirer ones. You wiggled your eyebrows as he ripped the Hershey’s kisses off the cards to eat.

“Here you go, Rogers.” The boy handed Steve a rose. You perked up as he took it.

“Peggy sent you a rose?” You asked.

“No. It’s from Bucky. He think he’s funny and had bought one since freshman year. He even drew a heart on the card this time, how thoughtful.” Steve was snickering as you swiped the card out of his hand. It was pure humour.

To: Steven G Rogers Just ‘cause you actually got the girl doesn’t mean you’re not getting a rose. - Buck ♥

You shook your head, smiling to yourself and placed the card back on Steve’s desk. The girl came around and placed three grams on your desk: Peggy, Sam and a half assed one from Natasha and Clint combined.

“And these are for you.” The boy extended his hand holding six roses. Your brows shot up.

“Are you sure?”

He nodded. “Positive.”

You cautiously took the roses feeling a few eyes on you and hear a few whispers. You opened the first card seeing Bucky’s handwriting. There was one simple word written: Smile. You blinked and began opening the rest of the little cards seeing a single word on each: Laugh. Nose. Smarts. Funny. Everything.

You smiled to yourself feeling your cheeks warm in a blush. You wanted to tell him he was an idiot but you refrained, basking in the small moment of affection. Commercialized or not, it did make you feel giddy.

You jiggled holding your books and carrying the flowers to your locker. You were speed walking back to your locker so you could quickly put away your things and find Bucky. Peggy was there with her own rose in hand.

“So the rumour was true,” she motioned to the roses. “Who knew Bucky could be a romantic.”

“Hold these.” You gave her the flowers and tucked your books under your arm. Your fingers dialled through your lock combo, unclasping and opening the door.

A loud pop sounded startling those around you. Your heart was racing, body frozen as pink, red and white dust floated around in the air. Slowly you looked down at yourself seeing paint splattered to your front and a coating of chalk dust. It was everywhere: face, chest, legs, arms, hands. Peggy had her hands covering her mouth with a few paint hits on her clothing. Voices were murmuring with some phones out snapping pictures. Your books dropped to the floor as you wiped the paint away from your eyes and mouth.

There was some muffled laughter coming from down the hallway. You glanced over seeing Connie and her doll-like friends and a few jocks sniggering behind her.

“Oh, that’s for sure going to stain.” Connie quipped.

Your body heat was rising at an incredible rate from humiliation and anger. Peggy sharply turned on her heel, dropping the roses and marched her way over to Connie.

Connie straightened up, arms firmly folded across her chest with pursed lips.

“How childish can you be? Something doesn’t go your way so you hurt others?” Peggy’s voice was loud as she stormed over to the other girl. “Get over yourself! The only person that looks bad right now is you.”

“Do I Peggy? I’m not the one covered in paint.” Connie mused.

Peggy got closer.” You’re a pathetic bitch—“

Sam swooped in between Peggy and Connie before physical contact was made. He gently moved Peggy back telling her to relax.

“Carter. Anderson. Fury’s office now!” Mr Pierce broke through a cluster of students. He glanced to you, pointing. “You as well.”

Your teeth grinded together. You collected your books off the ground, shoving them into your locker and slammed the door shut. You followed behind the others and Pierce down to the main office.

Your fingers curled and uncurled as you sat in a cushioned chair in Principal Fury’s office. Peggy, Connie and you each had a good foot in between each other and no talking was allowed. Peggy was still steaming and Connie looked like a perfect princess as she sat checking her nails. You could cuss Connie to the moon but that still wouldn’t amount to anything.

It was silent, nothing but the clock on the wall ticking.

The door to Fury’s office opened and shut. His footsteps were loud and hard on the ground. Three student files were tossed onto his neatly organized desk. Your manila covered folder was on top with Peggy’s and Connie’s underneath. Fury stood behind his desk with his hands clasped behind his back.

“Valhalla does not accept bullying at any level. We are a community who help others,” the man in charge started. “Miss Carter, I can assume you would not like a strike on your perfect record? Brown, Dartmouth, and Cornell are the schools you applied to, correct?”

“That’s correct, sir. But I don’t believe I’ve done anything wrong. I was standing up for my friend who was bullied by the other person in this room.” Peggy was matter of fact, a stern nod.

“Can you prove Miss Anderson did this?”

Peggy blinked. “I— No.”

Fury hummed, flipping open your file and scanned it over. “Five schools in seven years? Three high schools in four.”

You didn’t want to be in this room. You wish you could teleport to anywhere but here. “My mom and I move a lot.”

“Why’s that?”

You looked up from your lap, tipping your head to the side. “I don’t think that’s relevant to me getting sprayed by paint, sir.”

Fury nodded, turning his attention to Connie. “What were you doing at her locker, Miss Anderson?”

“My biology class is down that hallway, Mr Fury. I was just trying to walk back to my locker to go to lunch.” Connie’s tone was sweet like sugar, oozing with fabricated remarks.

There wasn’t anyway you could flat out prove Connie had set this up. But you knew in your bones that she was the mastermind behind it. Maybe she got one of the dumb basketball jocks to help her out. Either way it was sounding like nothing was going to be resolved right then and there. The office was going to start an “investigation” to see what they could find. Fury was continuing basic questions that weren’t assisting to the incident. Your time was wasting and the paint was drying to your skin and now ruined clothes.

In a quick motion you got up from the chair and flung open the door. Your feet moved quicker than you mind with Fury’s voice a distance away calling for you to come back. You had enough of Connie, enough of her jealous antics. It felt like a game and you were a be played wrong.

“Mr Barnes, I can’t let you and Mr Rogers into the office.”

“Just listen for a sec, Miss Hill--”

Vice Principal Hill and Bucky’s voices collided. He was arguing and she was trying to turn him away at the front desk. You kept walking, not even making eye contact. There was a break in Bucky’s voice when he caught sight of you. He got to the door before you did, grabbing your arm to halt you. His hands cupped your stained face, concern flickering through his eyes.

“Are you okay?”

You pushed his hands away. “I’m covered in fucking paint, Bucky,” you glanced past him seeing Steve stare down at his feet. Your shoulders trembled in a sigh, closing your eyes. “Take me home.”

Bucky opened the office door and walked out after you. He shrugged off his letterman and draped it over your shoulders. You were pretty sure the paint probably wrecked your belongings. You and Bucky exited through the side door to the student parking lot. Not a word was said to his car or during the car ride to your home. You eyes stayed focused on the window. All you could smell was paint and chalk. He parked and you jumped out into the snow. You went around to the back of the house, opening the back door and went inside. It was quiet and you were grateful your mother took an afternoon shift at the hospital.

You shedded Bucky’s jacket and discarded your shoes. He followed you like a ghost, keeping his mouth zipped but you knew he wanted to ask you a million and a half questions. Immediately you turned on the shower upstairs, getting a dark towel and gathered fresh clothes from your room. You disappeared into the bathroom leaving him in your bedroom.

The water was warm as it dripped down your skin. The paint swirled at the bottom around the drain. At least it was coming off. You scrubbed your skin and your face free of the paint. You didn’t know how long you were in the shower until the water started to run cool and your were pruning. You dried yourself off and sat on the edge of the tub. One of the sweaters that you always worn was destroyed, the jeans were maybe salvageable. You tugged on the clean clothes and checked in the mirror to make sure there was no red or pink on your face before exiting the bathroom.

Bucky was sat at the edge of the bed, phone in hand. His head lifted when you closed the door.

“Do you know if Peggy’s alright?” You asked.

“Steve says she’s not in trouble but she’s pissed.” He said.

“Yeah, that makes two of us.” You sat down next to him, burying your face into your hands. “You can go back. Make it in time for your next class.”

“I’m not going back. Think you’re more important than English and weight lifting.” Bucky gently removed your hands. The back of your eyes prickled but it wasn’t worth spilling tears over Connie Anderson. She didn’t deserve that kind of satisfaction.

You pulled the sleeves down over your hands of the light sweater you had put on. “This is stupid right, everything about this is stupid?” You looked over at Bucky. “Does she actually think I’m going to cave in?”

Some part of you wanted to cave only because of how Connie was acting over a guy that didn’t even like her back anymore. Bucky had moved on and it was best she did too. She was stuck in a fantasy.

“I’ll talk to her.”

You gave him a look, shaking your head. “Because that worked so well the last time, right?” You didn’t mean to be so harsh to Bucky but realistically what more could he do, what more could anyone say?

Bucky enveloped you in his arms, pulling you back to lay on the bed. He murmured an apology, one that he didn’t need to say but that’s just how he was. And at the end of the day, he was with you.

“Hey Happy, can you get us two chocolate milkshakes and two burgers for me and my girl here.” Bucky shrugged off his jacket and occupied the chair across from you.

You dusted the snow off yourself, unzipping your jacket and removed your gloves. Happy’s was half vacant, a hum of voices chatting and the TV behind the bar top on to the New York Rangers game. You glanced over at the burly man who owned the diner as he began to make the milkshakes and place in the order for food.

“Heard there was boys movie night tonight.” You said to Bucky.

He nodded, “Yeah decided to ditch it. Besides, Stevie will probably ditch halfway to go see Peggy so no one can be mad at me.”

You smiled lightly as the two milkshakes were placed in front of you. The whipped cream was homemade and spiralled upward high with a cherry on top. You licked some of the cream off the straw and popped the cherry into your mouth. Bucky leaned back in his chair, gazing over at the TV for a few moments to watch the hockey game. From what you understood this was a date, well, you had been to Happy’s plenty of times but there were usually five other people accompanying. Plus Bucky had loosely indicated it was one, a “food date” as he called it. His attention turned to you, the fluorescent lights didn’t do his blue eyes enough justice.

He cracked a smile at your unintentional staring. Your eyes flickered to the table, moving your milkshake glass closer to you. “Isn’t it counteractive to get a milkshake when it’s cold outside?”

“Maybe,” he replied. “But it’s a rule that you have to get one when you’re here.”

“Yeah? Says who?”

“Me.”

Of course, you laughed to yourself. You sipped on the ice cream drink, lashing fluttering as you peered over at Bucky. You had nerves bubbling in the pit of your stomach. The entire week your mind had been swirling from the kiss to bowling to now. You had accepted the fact that yes, you had a crush on Bucky Barnes and it wasn’t going to go away any time soon.

“I like your laugh, you know.” Bucky commented nonchalantly.

One of your brows arched. “You like my laugh?” He confirmed with a nod. You shifted in your seat and stirred around the milkshake. “What else do you like about me?”

Admittedly you were curious because out of everyone in Valhalla, somehow Bucky was struck by you.

“Busting down the gate with a heavy question,” he joked lightly. “I like your smile, I like that you’re funny and can take a joke especially hanging around Clint. You’re smart, real smart. And I like your nose.”

Your head tipped. “You like my nose?”

“Yeah, I like your nose.” He replied, picking up a spoon to scoop some ice cream out of the glass. “I like everything about you.”

Your stomach flipped upside down. He didn’t even know everything about you but you were sinking in the feeling. Happy startled you as he came around with two red baskets that had your burger and fries. You smiled politely, saying thank you as you took the ketchup bottle. Bucky was already a quarter into his burger by the time you had eaten three fries.

You still had your cautious guard but for now you’d wade in the waves.

Friday was a bust. You didn’t get out of bed, nor did you have the will to go to school. After you mother had heard what happened with Connie, she had taken it upon herself to call Fury to give him a piece of her mind. You could hear her stern talk from the kitchen all the way up behind your closed bedroom door. You rolled over, covering your ears with the pillow.

By Monday morning your anger had passed. Your things had been moved into Peggy’s locker a hallway over since yours was still covered in the festive paint. There were a few stares in the hallway as you walked on by fellow students. You kept your head held high and ignored everything around you. Steve gave you a short hug upon your arrival to math but spoke nothing of the situation which you silently thanked him for. It was better to move on instead of moping about it.

Bucky was there outside of the classroom when the bell rang having dipped class early. You gave him a small smile, storing your books in his locker.

“Do you wanna eat here or do you want go out?” He asked.

He had hesitancy in his voice wondering whether it was a good idea to go into the cafeteria where Connie would be. You grabbed his hand, lacing your fingers together and moved forward to the lunch area. Some freshmen shuffled out of the way as you strolled in with Bucky. Your table was claimed already by Sam and Natasha, Sam waving you over.

“Go ahead, I’ll be a sec.” You let go of Bucky’s hand.

You pivoted on your heel and set straight in the direction of Connie’s table. The laughter coming from the table died down as your approached the table. You took at glance at the kids before settling your sharp eye on Connie.

“Connie,” you faux smiled. “I wanted to thank you. I want to thank you for spraying me paint in front of fifty kids and humiliating me. I felt so bad at first for myself but then I realized I feel bad for you. I am so sorry that you think you have to do things like this because your self esteem is so poor. Maybe if you were a little nicer your ugly wouldn’t be on the outside like it is on the inside. So thank you, Connie, and stay away from my friends, me, and my boyfriend.”

Connie’s eyes were glaring like daggers, her fingers gripping her drink with enmity. You twisted back to see Bucky still standing where you had left him with Steve, Peggy, and Clint. Peggy had a smug grin on her face, waving to Connie in spite.

“Are we just going standing here or going to eat lunch?” You asked them.

“After you, m’lady.” Clint motioned courteously.

You led the way to the food line, Bucky’s arm slinging over your shoulder. “So, boyfriend?”

“Status pending.” You pushed his side, smiling. He stopped you before the line, a longing look in his eye before he firmly pressed his lips to yours. Your smile grew bigger. Status approved.

bucky list: @buckychrist @bvcks @lila-bard @stanclub @stardustparker @buckybarnesppreciationsociety @sweetwaterprincess @demongirl0913 @queenlydias @dontpanc @kingsebstan @cauraphernelia @yourwonderbelle @beauty-who-doesnt-need-a-beast @bleedlikerubies @fallenaristocat @bubblybuckybarnes @my-world97 @mystic-scripture @ragnarokbarnes @kali-rambles @pao-prazz @thorins-queen-of-erebor @eventyyr @abbadontherisingqueen @lovinglokiforever @justasimpleassbitch @red-wallflowers @brooklynightsky @hellaqueerangelofthelord @yknott81 @rvmanova @blame-the-russo-bros@buckybarneshairpullingkink @laurfangirl424 @buckyparkerish @sarcasticallysarah

CYM *tags open*: @villainsaremorerelatable @akamaiden @sofreakinmanyfandoms @smolbeanthings @autumnstarks @memory-of-a-goldfish @lizfawn @moonstruckhargrove @moonbeambucky@csigeoblue @sgtbookybarnes @marco-hvittyvik @tempestistired @trust-me-im-joly @in-the-potterhead-know @foenixphire @sergeantbannerbarnes @wi-atch-recs

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes au #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky barnes #marvel fanfic #marvel au #fic: change your mind #it always ends in a queue

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stayprettybeeducated · 6 years ago

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You can’t keep leaving and coming back to me like as if nothing ever happened

You always follow the same pattern. You will text me nonstop. Tell me how much you love talking to me. Then, as soon as I’ve grown attached to you, you will leave. You will drop off the face of the planet with zero warning or explanation.

For days (or weeks or even months) at a time, you won’t answer your texts. You will become invisible. I will have no way of reaching you. You will become a stranger to me.

When you come back, you won’t even apologize. Most of the time, you won’t even acknowledge the fact that you left in the first place. You will just waltz back into my world as if you never left. You expect to pick up right where you left off — but that is not going to keep happening.

I can’t trust someone like you, because you are unreliable. I never know whether you are going to answer your messages after two minutes or two months. I never know whether you are going to invite me out over the weekend or ignore my existence. I never have any idea what you are thinking because your emotions are all over the place. You do one thing and then another.

I can’t read your mind because your mixed signals are so confusing and it’s not like you actually open up to me about the way you are feeling. There are times when you’ll admit that you miss me and you like hanging out with me, but you never reveal the reasons behind your disappearing act. You never tell me where you go or who you’re with or what the hell you’re thinking. I have to create my own rationalizations in order to keep from hating you. And lately, I’m sick of making excuses for you.

Every time I think it might be different, that you might actually stick around this time, history repeats itself. No matter how long you stay, no matter how close we become, you always end up leaving. You always end up hurting my heart.

You can’t keep rotating in and out of my life whenever you feel like it. You have to make a decision. You can either be there for me all of the time or none of the time. You don’t get to hover at the halfway mark. You aren’t allowed to treat me well only sometimes. That’s not the way relationships work.

I’m sick of guessing how much longer until you leave again. I can’t be with someone who keeps me trapped in a constant state of paranoia, who makes me wonder whether I am doing enough to convince them to stay.

I need someone who is going to answer every text I send, not pick and choose them based on convenience. I need someone who follows through on promises and keeps their word, even when it’s inconvenient. Someone who I am confident I can trust to stay loyal — and to just stay.

#vxndalizing

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polygrumpssecretsanta · 7 years ago

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Redshirts

Author: @sailorbryant Recipient: @a-d-a-a-r Pairing: Egobang Warnings: Nearly Factual Star Trek Information Title: RedShirts Summary: Star Trek AU. Next gen-era. Joining Starfleet hasn’t really been the non-stop action-packed adventure that Arin had been led to believe, but at least he’s got a buddy - and unlimited access to some ancient video games - to keep him sane. Word Count: 2600

Joining Starfleet had to have been the worst god damn decision of Arin’s life.

“My neck is still killing me," he wined, collapsing down on his bunk. He stared up at the blinding white ceiling above him once again wishing he was a high enough rank so that he could have a small port head window in their quarters. It would be nice to stare at something besides the blinding white of the bulkhead that was the same as the rest of the ship.

“Don't be a baby," Dan said offhandedly typing away at his PADD from his desk on the other side of their cramped, shared ensign quarters. “It was just a normal inoculation hypo.”

“No man, I'm telling you. Barry doesn't like me. He always jabs them in super hard.”

Dan scoffed. “That’s Chief Medical Officer Kramer to you ensign,” Dan parroted back mockingly, still never looking up from his PADD. “And maybe he only hates you because you keep calling him Barry like he doesn’t outrank the fuck out of you. Now be quiet, I have a thousand pages of requisition forms to go through.”

Arin sighed, stretching his arms up and resting his head on his hands, pulling his full body red uniform tightly around his midsection.

Life aboard a Galaxy-class cruiser had ended up being quite different than he imagined. The holo’s had always made life aboard an exploratory vessel seem like a non-stop thrill ride. Traveling to unexplored world’s, traversing the complicated social quagmire that was a first contact moment, or the heart-pounding thrill of battle with a violent, warmongering enemy.

Instead, his day to day on the USS Endeavor was spent mostly on continued training, drills, and tons and tons of data worth of reports he had to fill out, then fill out again when they were sent back from a CO with a list of minor errors and recommendations.

The closest he came to experiencing life or death situations was reading the official reports of the adventures aboard the USS Enterprise, whose crew seemed to be living a life closer to what Arin had imagined as a teenager who hung up Starfleet Academy posters in his room. Not that Arin would wish upon his crew the death and danger that seemed to constantly follow the Enterprise around. Still, he thought as he realized he’d been staring nonstop at the bulkhead nonstop for a long time, there was a reason they were constantly receiving lectures about watching for the signs of space madness. It was easy to get obsessed with the monotony.

It wasn’t all shift rotations and paperwork, he reminded himself - forcefully shaking off his far too introspective mood. His head slowly turned to look over at his roommate, sitting at his desk in a red uniform identical to Arin’s. His bouncy, untamed hair casting a shadow onto his forehead, his brow tensed in concentration.

Arin stared at him for a long time, greedily admiring his slim frame, and intense look. He had never thought that their long jumpsuits were very flattering, but it did seem to hug to Dan in a way that never failed to catch Arin’s gaze and hold it.

He shook his head vehemently. This was not the time for perving on his friend.

“Dan,” Arin said suddenly, his tone serious, and his roommate groaned.

“Arin,” he replied just as serious.

“Best buddy.”

“No, Arin, I’m serious. Whatever you’re going to suggest, I’m not going along with it. I’ve got too much stuff to finish.”

“Let’s hit up the holodeck.”

There was a long drawn out pause before he heard Dan mutter a soft, “Fuck,” before sitting down his PADD.

Arin was already leaping out his bunk, a grin stretching across his lips.

---

When Arin was young his dad had taken him to an old museum in town for his birthday. It was one of the few museums on Earth that still had classic games: board games, card games, and Arin’s personal favorite, video games. Old, ancient games that required a controller and a screen, nothing like the virtual games that children played now with their heads stuck inside a helmet that showed them brand new worlds in a heartbeat. Those games were practically archaic compared to the ones available now.

Arin had loved them.

He had begged his dad to take him back to the museum as often as he could in order to have the chance to play through the small dismal selection that they had until he knew them all by heart.

Now he was stationed aboard a Galaxy-class cruiser with admittance to the ships’ many holodecks available to him whenever he had any downtime. The holodeck was the peak of virtual technology, giving him access to any moment in time or space and only limited by what the user could imagine.

“Oh, come on you little shit, get it together!” he cried out at the screen, once again leading his little avatar on the screen into its doom, and ignoring Dan’s loud giggles beside him on the couch.

And Arin used it to play late 20th/early 21st-century video games.

It wasn’t a hobby that a lot of people understood or even wanted to. HIs first year aboard the ship he’d spent his breaks in the holodeck, enjoying the games alone. Then his old roommate had been transferred off ship and Dan, fresh-faced from the academy, had moved in. They had hit it off immediately. He didn’t understand at first, but he’d been open-minded enough to give Arin’s strange way of spending leisure time a shot, and here they were. Dan only played sometimes, spending most of his time enjoying just watching Arin play, adding his own commentary or mostly just laughing at Arin’s own off color commentary as he hilariously failed in what he was trying to accomplish.

“Jump up on that ledge, you ding dong.”

“You’re speaking nonsense and I won’t listen to it,” Arin said as he jumped up on the ledge immediately, only to find himself knocked back by a giant lizard and fell to his death. “You whore!” he bellowed into the echo chamber of the holodeck room, while Dan laughed and laughed at him from his seat beside him on the couch.

When the darkness of space closed in around him, and the routine of an excitement deprived existence started to wear him down, spending an hour or two with Dan. Watching his toothy smile and listening to his distinctive laugh - it was definitely the bright spot of his days.

---

After two years on board the USS Endeavor excitement finally came to their ship. It was supposed to be a routine mission. First Contact with a new planet that's first foray into light speed travel had sent one of their ships into a near head-on collision with one of the Federations’ satellites. Some initial surveillance had shown them to be a relatively benign, peaceful species whose last planetary level war had been hundreds of years ago.

Most of the primary bridge crew had opted out, giving their seconds and replacements a chance for a learning experience. There were very few members of security heading down with the landing party, and those that were had some sort of separate specialty that they would get a chance to indulge in. That was why Dan was going down, with his focus on botany, to study a particular fascinating species of trees that their probes had picked up on that they felt could have some useful medicinal purposes. Most of the landing party were young crewmembers on their first or second missions, the highest ranking member being Lieutenant Brian Wecht, the head of the astrophysics department, who, being the newest ranked officer, had found himself bullied into the position.

It would’ve been a very easy, run-of-the-mill mission if the Romulans hadn’t beaten them to the planet first.

When the red alert alarms had started blaring, Arin kicked into gear and reported to his designated station without a thought. It wasn’t until he saw the look on CO’s face that he realized that this wasn’t a drill.

He tried his damndest to be on the party sent down for the rescue, but instead, he found himself standing beside CMO Kramer waiting to assist him whenever they brought back the survivors. It was only his training that kept him standing as he overhead the reports being delivered to Barry.

Half the landing party immediately incapacitated and captured. At least two deaths so far, a good chunk of them missing.

Guilt burned through him like a phaser blast. He had wished for excitement and danger, but now that it was here instead of adrenaline running through his veins it was just an ice cold and nauseating dread.

He had other friends that were missing. People he had graduated the academy with, fellow ensigns he saw every day, but it was the worry about Dan that seemed to be overwhelming him completely. Never seeing Dan’s teasing smile, or hearing his laugh. It was unthinkable.

Arin was so busy stuck in his head, imaging him sitting in the holodeck alone or an empty bunk across from his that it took him a moment to notice the movement in the transporter room. Then Barry’s hands were on his arm, pulling him back out of the way, and he came back to the present. The room buzzed suddenly, the sound of particles forming and rearranging, then the platform was filled with materializing crewmen.

Dan’s hair stuck out like a rose bush in the middle of a desert. There were a few bodies lying prone, but Dan wasn’t one of them; his arm was slung around the shoulders of Lt. Wecht’s bright blue uniform. He looked weak, but his eyes were open, searching the room until they met Arin’s and a small smile quirked up the side of his lips.

His knees almost gave out and sensing his unstableness the CMO’s grip tightened until he was able to keep himself steady. Then they were both heading into the fray to help. Arin didn’t even pretend like he was heading anywhere else but straight to Dan’s side.

“Hey,” he found himself saying in a breathy voice, unable to look away from Dan’s bright open eyes, or half smile. There was a speck of dried blood on his temple but it only slightly registered to Arin.

“Hey, yourself,” Dan replied equally as soft, looking up at him with a tired grin.

“I-” Arin started to say, but was quickly interrupted by Brian.

“Make yourself useful, Hanson,” he said sternly, but not unkindly, and Arin took the soft reprimand to heart. Sliding Dan’s free arm around his own shoulder, he took his weight onto himself (spending a lot of energy not thinking about how right Dan felt pressed against him) and freed the Lieutenant to help other injured crewmen.

They slowly made their way towards the med bay, Arin joking with Dan about how lucky he was going to be - being doted on by the nurses and getting extra rations that Arin would be trying to steal - and treasuring every small chuckle that Dan gifted him with. He left his friend in the capable hands of the med bay, reluctant to the point of flirting with insubordination, but the reassurances of his friend in his relative wellness forced back to help with the ongoing crisis.

The second he was relieved from his shift, six hours later, exhausted and weak on his feet, he rushed to the med bay and pleaded his way to Dan’s bedside. His friend, still looking rather worse for wear, but comfortably lounging on the bright white sheets, gave him a small smile as soon as he entered the private room.

“I’m so sorry, I just got off shift,” Arin breathed out in a rush.

“You look like shit,” Dan huffed out, interrupting him before he could continue. Arin glared at him, but Dan just laughed. “You should go to sleep man, it’s just going to be worse tomorrow. I’ll still be here when you wake up I promise. No one ever died from some cuts and bruises and a sprained ankle.”

Something truly awful must have crossed Arin’s face because Dan immediately looked regretful.

“I’m sorry, I’m a little woozy from the painkillers. Pretty bad taste I guess, just ignore-”

“Dan,” Arin said seriously, stopping the other man’s rambling in its tracks. “This is all my fault.”

There was a silent pause, before Dan finally huffed out, “What?”

Arin collapsed into the empty chair sitting beside the bed.

“It’s all my fault. All I’ve ever done is whine and complain about how fucking boring it always fucking is and begging for something to fucking happen and then something happens and I nearly fucking lost you!” His voice cracked at the end and realized he was nearly shouting. He slid further down in his chair. “You could’ve died,” he whispered, knowing his voice sounded haunted just at the thought, but the mixture of exhaustion and the rapidly approaching adrenaline crash had left him unable to think before he spoke.

Dan stared at him, obviously trying to take in the sudden seriousness of his usually laid-back friend before he finally graced him with a quiet smile. “But, I didn’t.”

Arin nodded, unable to let his gratefulness of that fact overweigh the tremendous guilt that was currently clinging to his heart.

“This isn’t your fault, you idiot,” Dan continued, fondness lacing through his voice. “Shit happens, man, and you didn’t cause this any more than you can change the weather or make the stars fall out of the sky. There’s not a person on this ship who doesn’t want any break from paperwork that they could get, but I bet none of them are sitting around thinking that they are somehow responsible for the Romulans being absolute jerks. It was just bad luck,” he finished softly.

Arin took a deep breath, and it felt like the first one he had taken since he had found out what happened to the landing party.

“Besides,” Dan continued with a rakish grin, and Arin felt his heart melting at the sight, “you complain about everything. Doesn’t make this one thing any more special.”

Dan’s hand was laying on the bed, palm up, and Arin was gripped with the urge to hold it so strong it nearly jerked him forward in his seat. It seemed like such a great, wonderful idea he couldn’t understand why he hadn’t done it the second he walked in the room. Why he hadn’t done it months ago when they’d been sitting so close on the shared couch in the holodeck.

“I don’t know how I’d survive on this damn ship if you weren’t here every day,” Arin blurted out instead. “It wouldn’t just be boring, it’d be fucking excruciating. You make me happy, not just because you’re my friend, but just because you exist and if I never got to see you smile again I just don’t what I’d do with myself.”

There was a stunned silence in the room, only permeated by the sounds of machines beeping in the hallways as both men tried to come to terms with what Arin had just said.

“That was pretty gay, man.”

Arin glared.

“Oh quit being a dumbass and just come over here and kiss me,” Dan finally said, sitting up in his bed.

They shared wide, identical grins before Arin stood up and did as Dan asked.

Joining Starfleet had to have been the best god damn decision of Arin’s life.

#egobang #polygrumps #shipgrumps #sailorbryant #a-d-a-a-r #pgss gift 2017

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oldfashionedswiftcurse · 7 years ago

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Alwyn vs. Swift Pt. 5

Taylor returned home early the next morning and found her father frantically on the phone. She slipped in through the front door and overheard his conversation.

“I swear to God, Susan, if this is some sick game,” he began, but the voice on the other line interrupted him.

Taylor froze. There was no way he was talking to her mother. Her father swore that when her mother walked out on them ten years ago, that was the last bit of contact he had with his wife. However, Taylor realized that like always, her father had lied to her.

“We had a deal. I moved her closer to you, but not so you could reach out to her. When you left, it nearly destroyed her. I won’t pick up the pieces when you break her heart again.”

So it was really her mother, and from what Taylor gathered, her father thought that she had run away to meet up with her mother. As if that would really happen. The only way Taylor would travel to find her mother would be to curse and yell at her for abandoning them. She listened closely, hoping her father would slip up and mention where her mother was currently living.

“Just stay away from Taylor. And let me know if you hear from her,” he said angrily, hanging up.

Taylor gave him a few moments to compose himself before she entered the kitchen.

“Morning, Dad,” she said casually, waiting to hear his outburst.

“Taylor Alison Swift, where the hell were you? And why didn’t you call me back?! You’re grounded.”

She could tell this form of parenting was new to him. Her dad hardly realized anything different about her, so she stopped telling him her concerns, fears, and dreams.

“Why does it matter, Dad? You’re never here when I do come home. Maybe I got tired of coming home to an empty house,” she muttered, and she saw his eyes darken in regret.

“Sweetheart…”

“Forget it, Dad. I’m going to my room,” she stated and turned to leave.

Taylor had managed to sneak her father’s cell phone off of the kitchen island. Texting the number listed as “Susan,” Taylor impulsively asked her mother to meet. The number responded immediately with an address in Munich. Looks like her mother isn’t really that close. From what Taylor could tell, Munich would certainly be a day’s trip on train, but she was willing to do it. She was angry with her father for keeping this from her and her mother for nearly everything else. She agreed to meet at the Munich address on Saturday afternoon, two days from today. If she left class early on Friday afternoon, Taylor knew she make it to Munich by midnight. She would rent a hotel room, find some food, and meet her mother the next day.

When she arrived at school, Taylor immediately raced to Rebecca, asking if she wanted to visit Germany with her this weekend.

“Germany?” Rebecca questioned. “That sounds oddly fun, but I’ve got a date with Mark.”

Taylor told her best friend about her intricate plan, and Rebecca was shocked.

“You know what? I can cancel on him. This is so much more important. Shit, your mother…I can’t believe this.”

Taylor paused.

“No,” she began, “this is my problem. Go and enjoy your date. I’ll be fine.”

“Like hell you will. You think I’m going to let you, an American, travel to another European country all by yourself?”

At that moment, Joe appeared, hands in his pocket.

“Becks, do you mind if I talk to Taylor alone?”

“Sure,” Rebecca stated, turning to leave. “You might as well just take Joe. He knows his way around Europe, just ask our nannies.”

Taylor chuckled, but grew silent as Rebecca walked away.

“Hey,” Joe muttered, smiling slightly. “Look, about last night…”

“You don’t need to apologize, Joe,” she said, shaking it off.

“I do. I was drunk and idiotic, and I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable.”

“You didn’t,” she admitted honestly. “You were entertaining, for sure.”

“Oh no,” he said, placing his palm over his forehead in embarrassment, “I hope I didn’t ruin my chances with you.”

“Well…”

“Anything. I’ll do anything.”

“Come with me to Germany this weekend,” she stated, and he lifted his eyebrows in confusion.

“Aren’t you supposed to be punishing me? A trip alone with you to another country doesn’t seem like much of a punishment.”

“Well, it will be because you’ll be falling in love with me all over the world, and I still won’t give in to your flirtation,” she teased, and he chuckled.

“You’re finally getting the hang of this whole teasing thing, love.”

“So will you come with me?”

“Just say when. I pegged you as more of a Paris girl, but to each his own, I suppose. Note to self, leggy blondes prefer the German countryside over the Parisian city.”

She rolled her eyes, but when she returned home, she packed a backpack for their trip. The next morning, Taylor went to class like normal, but she left a half hour early. When she stumbled into the hallway, she found a beaming Joe waiting by the door. Because it was growing colder, he was wearing a denim jacket, black jeans, and Converse, as well as a black beanie covering his blonde hair.

“Ready for our adventure, love?” He whispered, handing her a Euro train pass.

She nodded, grinning back at him.

“Remind me why you’re so excited to see a woman who left you and your dad,” he questioned, furrowing his eyebrows.

“I’m not excited, per se. I just want to see her and tell her what a huge mistake she made. I deserved to have a mother who constantly loved me, not one who left just because things got too tough.”

“Beautiful and candid. You just keep surprising me.”

They left campus together and the second they got to the train station, Joe heard Taylor’s stomach grumble in hunger.

“What’ll it be then? Sandwiches? Sushi?”

Taylor eyed him slowly.

“I can just wait to eat on the train.”

His eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

“Silly me, I just assumed the nasty sound coming from your stomach actually meant something.”

“Joe, I’m too nervous to eat. This is my mom, okay? This could be perfect, and she’ll finally realize how much she hurt me and my dad. Or this could go very badly, and she’ll admit she never loved me and doesn’t feel bad for hurting us.”

Joe chuckled, but grew serious when she saw how stressed she was.

“Taylor, your mum made a huge mistake, and it quite possibly ruined every good thing in her life. She probably doesn’t understand what it means to truly love someone, and she probably never will. That, however, does not mean that you need to carry the weight of your mother’s blunder. Now please choose a place for us to eat before my stomach starts a band with yours.”

She tried not to smile, but eventually, she couldn’t help herself.

“Fine, sandwiches for now. I’ll see how I’m feeling in an hour. My appetite is very particular. I have to eat as often as possible and as much as possible.”

He chuckled.

“Did you just make a joke? Remind me to never deprive you of food. And always remember that when you chose not to eat, I was the one who kept convincing you to eat.”

Their train finally arrived, and they got comfortable in their seats. The train ride was nearly eight hours nonstop, so Taylor took two seats opposite Joe and sprawled her legs over the seats. After sleeping for a little bit, they sat next to each other and rotated songs from their playlists. Joe nearly blushed when he realized that Taylor had one of his band’s original songs on her playlist. While listening to their music, Taylor fell asleep again, resting his cheek against Joe’s shoulder. Joe left their seats to pick up some food and returned just when Taylor was waking up again.

“I got you some Pepsi and a BLT,” he whispered, resting the food against the seat.

“How’d you know what I like? You took a pretty big gamble.”

“That first night after the show, when we were moving from pub to pub, you kept talking about how hungry you were and then you kept mumbling ‘BLT.’ I am a gambler, but I never take unnecessary risks.”

“How could you possibly remember that?” She teased, straightening her unkempt hair.

“Well, that’s when I realize that I was attracted to you. I couldn’t help remembering. I wanted to know everything about you then.”

“And now?” She asked.

“Now I’m afraid we know too much about each other.”

“Well, you’re on an eight hour train ride to another country with me to meet a woman I haven’t seen in about ten years. So yeah, I think we’ve definitely crossed that line.”

“Can I ask you something?”

Taylor was hesitant, but nodded. These kinds of questions always scared her.

“Why didn’t you invite Martin? It seemed like you guys were getting pretty serious at the party and…”

His words trailed off.

“Martin is a great guy. I’m not sure. I just didn’t feel comfortable telling him about my mom. I just…didn’t want to ruin his perfect life, I guess. We don’t even know each other that well.”

“Hmm.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” She asked nervously.

“Just an observation. Does that mean you feel comfortable around me?” He said seriously.

Taylor didn’t know what to do when he wasn’t joking.

“I do, as much as it kills me to say. I probably feel the most comfortable with you…but your drunken confessions may have helped that happen.”

“Oh no,” he said, a slight rosy blush appearing on his cheeks, “you’ll never let me live that down.”

“Never.”

The train came to a stop, and Taylor and Joe exited. They found their hotel, booked two nights stay, and proceeded to look for food. It was nearly eleven at night, and after stopping by a late night fast food place, they got to their hotel. Joe allowed Taylor to shower first, and he turned the TV on. He ordered in for ice-cream, so by the time Taylor got out of the shower, it was waiting. She slipped it into the fridge while she waited for Joe to finish showering. She laid a towel on the bed when she heard the shower shut off, and Joe was grinning. Taking the spot next to her, they began digging into their rocky road pint.

“This makes up for having your drool all over my t-shirt today,” he mumbled in between spoonfuls.

“Oh, you little baby,” she teased, “I had to deal with your drunk self for an entire night. I thought you’d puke all over me.”

“Luckily, the only kind of vomiting I did was straight from my heart.”

“Your corny lines are getting old, Alwyn.”

“Luckily, my body is maintaining its youthful glow.”

“I don’t know,” Taylor began, giggling. “I’m spotting a few wrinkles right there.”

She ran a finger along his cheek, smearing ice-cream along his face. Joe’s face wrinkled in disgust, but he reacted quickly. With his ice-cream still in his mouth, he leaned over Taylor and deposited the melted ice-cream onto her neck. Taylor screamed at the coldness of it and pushed Joe away, resting a dirty hand along his white t-shirt. He jumped off the bed, examining his filthy t-shirt, and scolded her.

“Miss Swift, you’ve gotten me all mucked up,” he said as she tried to control her giggles.

Using the towel that they held the ice-cream on, Taylor wiped the remains of the ice-cream from her neck and tossed him the towel. He threw the towel to the ground and lifted up his t-shirt. Lifting it over his head, Joe stripped down until Taylor had a near perfect view of his golden chest. He had some chest hair, but it was enough for Taylor to find extremely attractive. She watched him as he looked in his bag for another shirt, all the while hoping he couldn’t see her blushing cheeks. When he replaced his chest with a new t-shirt, he grinned at her.

“You know that feeling where someone’s stare could burn through your skin? I’m burning, love.”

She definitely felt her cheeks redden.

“I wasn’t…”

“It’s nothing to be embarrassed about. But just know that now you can’t keep using the excuse that we don’t have sexual chemistry. It’s near palpable, and it’s radiating off of you.”

“Shut up,” she teased, throwing a pillow at him.

He ducked quickly, chuckling to himself. He slipped into the other bed, turning to face Taylor. Taylor began thinking about tomorrow.

“I know you’re nervous about what might happen,” Joe whispered, “but just know that no matter what, you’ll always have Becks and me in your corner.”

“Thanks, I really needed that.”

“Good night, love.”

“Good night, Joe.”

#alwyn vs. swift #taylor and joe #taylor swift fanfiction #taylor swift #joe alwyn

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lynccycling · 6 years ago

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The NUMBER ONE FITNESS CLASS IN DFW by Classpass, CORE, has people chatting. You’ve heard it’s challenging in more ways than one, so how do you stay mindful in the heat of the struggle and keep coming back for more? Our CORE Instructors weigh in on how they stay mindful in class & include some of their favorite CORE burning moves that they love to incorporate into their classes. Learn a little bit about them and book your next CORE class!

TELL US YOUR FAVORITE CORE MOVE “Any oblique combo series! Love giving the sides of the body some attention, especially when it means I can get creative and try some new sequences.”

HOW DO YOU STAY MINDFUL IN CLASS? “When I’m taking: paying attention to your body is the name of the game, so being aware of distractions. When I catch myself thinking about what happened earlier in the day, my to do list, or what someone else is doing in class, I start from my toes and work my way up bringing awareness back to each part of my body and placing an emphasis on how I would describe my feelings to someone else. It usually helps me recognize what it is I need to hear and tell myself to keep moving.

When I’m teaching: Not thinking ahead! I try to forget what’s coming up, talking too much about what’s left, or how much time is left in class. It takes me and the class out of the moment when I get ahead of myself, and doesn’t allow for concentration on the task at hand. Just like the class itself, practice is everything, and I don’t always teach exactly how I want. I make notes for how I can be more present after each class!”

WHAT IS KELSEY’S CORE CLASS LIKE ? “Challenging. On purpose. And both mentally and physically. I try to always incorporate very simple moves we’ve done before with something new that will remind you what kind of progress can be made. I hope that people become motivated not because I’m motivating or because I’m asking them to do something, but because they start to realize over time they are capable of the work and capable of doing the hard thing. It’s an empowering feeling to do something you’re scared of, and I try to get you to that place in class. Sydney told me it’s “humbling but extremely motivating.” I’ll take that as a compliment, haha.”

HOW HAS CORE MADE YOU BETTER & STRONGER? “How much time do you have? Haha, really it’s changed me in more ways than I can count. For years I’ve thought about a class like CORE, and to be able to create my vision, see it come to life at the studio, and hear how it impacts people has been one of the most amazing things I’ve accomplished. It’s been a really good reminder to me that follow through is as important as the dream itself, and your own power lies in your uniqueness, so trust your instincts. It’s made me feel so much more confident in my abilities as a leader and as a fitness professional in the Dallas market. As for the class itself, it’s improved my stability and stamina more than anything I’ve ever done. I’m a better runner, cycling instructor, and athlete because of the varied movements in class. It’s even brought back some of my flexibility from ice skating and dance days. I’m able to push myself further in other workouts because of my core strength from the body weight exercises. I know I’m biased, but truly the best workout to create real change in your body. Just be consistent!”

BOOK CLASS WITH KELSEY

TELL US YOUR FAVORITE CORE MOVE “No one favorite but I love flow work on the mat, all the oblique business and a good multi-part move.”

HOW DO YOU STAY MINDFUL IN CLASS? “Breath!!! It’s funny because the whole point of coming to a workout, at least for me, is to check out of my day and tune into me- yet I find myself (and I know others do too) trying to distract myself from the workout when it gets tough. Don’t do that! Tune into your breath, into your thoughts (whatever they may be), into the beat and stay aware and connected.”

WHAT IS LIZ’S CORE CLASS LIKE ? “I really want MY class to be YOUR class. At the end of the day, this is your workout. Your choices. Your journey. Your body. Etc. I want to give you the platform to realize how much deeper you can dig, how much harder you can push, and help you realize that you DO have the control to do so. I hope it’s a great sweat and heavy burn, but most importantly I hope you walk out feeling proud, resilient and like you’re carrying a little less weight on your shoulders than when you walked in.”

HOW HAS CORE MADE YOU BETTER & STRONGER? “Communication- not just with others (although talking on a mic has definitely given me strength in that area) but with myself. I feel like class can do one of two things for me: 1. Help me learn how to process what I’m feeling and talk myself through it/learn from it. 2. Teach me to hone into a silent mind and just breathe. Both of these lessons I use frequently off the mat.”

BOOK CLASS WITH LIZ

TELL US YOUR FAVORITE CORE MOVE “Starting in Plank: One knee comes into chest, place on floor and rotate knee, side crunch up, reverse!”

HOW DO YOU STAY MINDFUL IN CLASS? “I still actively take a lot of classes and I always try to remember the things that resonated with me from other classes. I will change it around it make it my own but the feeling is what I want to achieve for my clients. I also love listening to inspirational podcasts before class to get me in the right mindset.”

WHAT IS GRACE’S CORE CLASS LIKE ? “I like to keep every class different, with lots of combo moves. It's going to be tough and challenging but you'll feel extremely powerful and strong after it's over! I always hear that class goes by super quick.”

HOW HAS CORE MADE YOU BETTER & STRONGER? “Obviously, the physical movement has made my body stronger but what I love is that it's made me train a lot of mental muscles. By nature, I'm a pretty introverted person but teaching CORE has allowed to step out of my comfort zone in such a natural, organic way!”

BOOK CLASS WITH GRACE

TELL US YOUR FAVORITE CORE MOVE “I love a simple move that pushes you to fight through some fire. One of my favs is plank to pike, plank to bear. Nonstop movement that makes you dig deep and push past the discomfort.”

HOW DO YOU STAY MINDFUL IN CLASS? “I try to play music that keeps me in the zone with lyrics that keep me focused on my theme for that class. Some classes are a little more light hearted and some are more intense.”

WHAT IS SYDNEY’S CORE CLASS LIKE ? “My class is a lot like me I think, we work hard but I don’t want it to be overly serious. I want it to be 45 mins that you enjoy and can escape into. I want you to push past the limits you have set in your head. And I want you to be proud of yourself when you walk out of the door.”

HOW HAS CORE MADE YOU BETTER & STRONGER? “Core has pushed me to become a better instructor. I was nervous at first when I first started teaching core. It’s so different than cycling. But teaching core has made me a better cycling instructor too. I feel more focused in class. I love being about to teach both cycling and core. It makes me a well rounded instructor.”

BOOK CLASS WITH SYDNEY

TELL US YOUR FAVORITE CORE MOVE “You can’t go wrong with a good plank series that burns from the inside out BUT one of my favorite aspects of CORE is the cardio at the end. It really ties the entire class together and makes you feel completely spent at the end of the 45 minutes. I love that we can take something so simple like jumping jacks and completely burn ourselves out (in a good way) from something we used to do for fun as kids.”

HOW DO YOU STAY MINDFUL IN CLASS? “When I’m taking class–its hard HA! No joke. But I try to stay focused and actually listen to what the instructors are telling my mind. I also remind myself that I’m still breathing and that if I’m breathing, I can keep moving.

When I’m teaching: before class I like to either look for a quote that stands out to me or listen to one of my many youtube motivational mantras and find a theme that I want to cover in class. Whether it be patience or letting go of perfection, overcoming fear or learning to have fun when we’re uncomfortable. Then I like to write down the quote or a few keywords on a post-it and put it on my laptop for class to refer back to when I am feeling like I’m being pulled from being present.”

WHAT IS KAYLA’S CORE CLASS LIKE ? “My nickname is the ‘Energizer Bunny’ so that’s pretty much what it’s like haha! A little more upbeat & funky. Fun and also motivating! I like to keep the moves simple but killer. If I can make you laugh during class then that really makes my day. You’ve GOT TO have fun during your workout or you won’t be motivated to keep doing it. It has to appeal to you in more ways than simply physical. I encourage you to keep thinking even though a lot of us tend to workout to escape everything us. In the end, it’s your mind that is going to continue to make your body move.”

HOW HAS CORE MADE YOU BETTER & STRONGER? “Wow. CORE has really made me step outside of my norm. From teaching, I had to take a step back from my normal instructing style & adapt to a unique format with different challenges. CORE has helped me overcome some personal fears & intimidations that held me back in order to get stronger mentally. From taking class... wow. It’s been humbling. I was so used to being a rockstar on my bike that it felt like a huge regression going to a bodyweight strength based class. I struggled and still struggle but CORE has taught me to let go of some perfectionist qualities and accept my body for what it has to give that day while also completely surprising myself on others. I’ve also learned to deal with my feelings. A LOT of feelings come up when you’re trying to push yourself physically. It’s been an eye-opening experience realizing I have so many feelings that need to be dealt with.”

BOOK CLASS WITH KAYLA

TELL US YOUR FAVORITE CORE MOVE “Warrior 2 flow OR jump squats!”

HOW DO YOU STAY MINDFUL IN CLASS? “Allowing the energy of the room to dictate the flow of the class. Being constantly aware of what people need as they move through the workout and giving it to them as we progress.”

WHAT IS OLIVIA’S CORE CLASS LIKE ? “A constant full body burn where we work really hard to really cool music. I try to pass along little nuggets of personal insight that I hope will translate to everyone individually as we sweat.”

HOW HAS CORE MADE YOU BETTER & STRONGER? “I have never been more aware of my mind and body before. I use core as an outlet for any pent up emotions (stress, anger, fear, etc) and it has really helped me move through so many challenges in my personal life. I am currently in a pretty intense internship environment and I don't think I would have made it through the constant stress of that without the 30+ people that show up to work out with me on Tuesday and Thursday mornings. I teach them, but they allow me to feel and be in a way that I can't during my internship.”

BOOK CLASS WITH OLIVIA

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medicinqui-blog · 8 years ago

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Badminton Special p2

The next day Yuuri was undoubtedly more nervous than anybody else. Victor had disappeared some time after 10am to find a bar and thus Yuuri had been left as the sole caretaker of Yuri until he set off for the warmup at about 12:30am. Already several people had gone, four of which had retired. 'Do you have your armband?' Yuuri checked before they left the lorry. 'Yes,' Yuri sighed. Yuuri had been fussing round him all morning like a mother hen and was probably going to end up chasing round after him on the course with a golf buggy. 'And your gas canister is all good?' 'Yes.' 'Is your girth tight enough?' 'I'll do it up when I'm on.' 'And you-' 'Relax! I've evented before, you know.' 'Yes, but this is bigger.' 'Yuuri, relax,' Victor finally appeared, visibly tiddlier than he had been when he'd left and, Yuuri noticed, laden with shopping bags. 'What did you buy?' He groaned, thinking of how full the lorry was going to be when they left the place. 'Oh, I got the most gorgeous new show jacket and some matchy matchy sets. I might've bought you a few things too, but I'll show you them later.' 'Have you spent our entire pension?' 'Possibly. But you know I love my matchy matchy.' Yuuri rolled his eyes and tucked his arm through Victor's in an attempt to calm his nerves. Victor squeezed him close and kissed his cheek. 'Please don't,' Yuri pleaded as he ran down his stirrups and gave his girth a last check before mounting from the ground with an energetic spring. 'Okay. I'm ready.' 'You sure?' Yuuri began to go search the lorry but Victor quickly intercepted him and dragged him back into his arms, hauling him away to follow Yuri down to the warmup ring. They stood in the middle of the ring, ignoring the stewards who gently suggested that they wait outside. Victor yelled at Yuri nonstop as he rode, pretending he knew what cross country entailed. 'Why is he going so fast?' He hissed to Yuuri, who patted him reassuringly on the shoulder. 'Because this is cross country. If he's not fast he'll not make it in the time, and he's both got the smallest horse and the most to prove so he's under pressure to do well.' 'Like a jump-off?' 'If that's what you have to tell yourself then sure.' They watched for a while longer as Yuri bombed around the warmup, still cutting everybody off and almost causing a few falls. Slowly the number of people in the warmup who had been there when they'd arrived began to dwindle and soon Yuri was being directed over to the arena. 'Should we go with him?' Yuuri suggested and Victor nodded his agreement. They hastily dashed down to the field behind Yuri to hold Fluffy on each side whilst they waited for him to be called into the start box. 'You'll be fine,' Yuuri assured him, patting him on the thigh for good luck. 'I know,' Yuri growled. 'You've trained over fences of this height before.' 'Yes, I know!' 'And you've got a good pony.' 'Yeah, that's great but I kind of need to go into-' 'Don't worry. Not like you're going to win with that dismal dressage,' Victor observed. 'Look, there's your boyfriend.' Yuri looked over his shoulder to see Otabek, who had just finished his round moments before and had obviously run full pelt to see him off judging by the magenta colour of his face. 'Yuri, davai!' He yelled, cupping his hands around his mouth so that the sound travelled. Yuri was suddenly being bustled into the starting box, but he found the time to give Otabek a thumbs up and flash a toothy grin before the countdown began. He replaced his hand on the reins and gripped them hard, bridging them in preparation for the gallop up ahead. The first fence was suddenly looking a whole lot bigger than it had in the company of his scathing coach and his fellow competitor when they'd been joking about it but confident enough. The crowd was agog yet again at the age of the rider and the size of both of them, no doubt underestimating them. Yuri knew that without a doubt he had to do justice to his horse. 'For mother Russia,' He muttered. 'Go!' The gruff shout came and Fluffy seemed to understand the command just as clearly as her rider. She launched forwards to the sound of the audience cheering, thundering down to the first with a determination in her that Yuri had never sensed before. He clung tightly to her mane and fought against the urge to just close his eyes and kick as the first fence flew towards them with increasing speed. Despite the nerves eating away at his insides it was quickly behind them and the audience's applause faded away as they began to gallop down the slope to the second. 'Give 'em hell, Yuri!' He heard Yuuri calling from the sidelines and this spurred him on faster. He was going to make the time, no question. He just had to keep the pace and not let Fluffy get either distracted or lose her momentum. She had brilliant stamina thanks to her constantly taking off but her concentration failed due to her career as a showjumper meaning she only had to do a few fences and then she was done. Without a fence to look for during a long gallop she was wont to searching for something else to stare at. He kept chatting to her with his leg and his reins, trying to keep her interest piqued in what she was doing. Before long they were rounding the corner to the first big ask- Savill's Staircase. He gulped hard and gave Fluffy a sharp kicking coming up to the string rails, meaning she launched herself over with renewed vigour and as a result was going too fast to worry about the steps. She skirmished a little going down the second due to the awkward striding but threw herself down it and up over the brush. The spectators clapped him on and he grinned, giving her a quick scratch on the withers and churning forwards. He gritted his teeth and took the angled approach to Countryside Birch, Fluffy leaving her back legs behind for an agonising moment but correcting herself neatly and continuing down over the next fence and then to The Lake. Yuri had never planned to go the long way due to the lack of leeway with time, and he wasn't about to change his mind now despite the 2 metre drop seeming even further than before. He took a deep breath and kicked on, growling loudly at his horse to ensure she knew there was no other choice. 'Get on!' He shouted and gave her a smack on the shoulder as she came into the last stride. He buried her a little bit she duly catapaulted herself over the rail and down into the water. He grimly held on and rode strongly towards the bank with his reins flapping and his heart in his throat. For a few seconds it looked like she was going to duck out to the left, but in the second stride she locked on and he breathed a minute sigh of relief as she lifted her feet up over it. The Offset Oxer next, something of a breather mid-course that provided a confidence build for any messy water mixups. Shogun Hollow, too, paled in comparison to some of the questions being asked of the riders and horses. He took the quick route through the KBIS Bridge and before he knew it he'd made it to the Grand Slam Trakehner. The one fence that scared him most. He'd had countless stops and falls at these fences, a more serious one resulting in a quick trip to A&E and a two week red card. This was undoubtedly the biggest and deepest and scariest he'd ever faced and he wasn't exactly looking forwards to whatever happened. This mindset wasn't helping matters, but thankfully the horse was not listening to her rider and she was going too fast to have a refusal. It would either be a runout, a hard slam on the brakes many strides before or a messy jump. He knew which one he wanted. 'Please just jump it,' He murmured to her, scratching her withers and beginning to sit back in preparation. He rammed his heels down and his legs forward to keep his seat as secure as possible should anything untoward happen. 'I swear, if you jump this fence you can have four feeds tonight.' Her ears pricked as if she knew what he was saying and, although she floundered a little in the face of such a magnificent ditch, squirmed over it and just managed to make it over with her rider still intact. 'Oh, good girl!' He cried with elation and rubbed her neck as she opened out her strides again. 'You brilliant, brilliant horse!' She popped easily through Hildon Water Pond and he felt much more confident coming up to the Sheep Feeder. Mirage Pond was gone by in a flash and even the Devoucoux Oxer- the biggest fence on course- didn't seem as terrifying as before. He barely even needed to encourage her coming into it and this was to be a brief downfall. Her feet fumbled without rider communication and her front legs caught on the first rail. Yuri's brain turned to static and he cried out as she began to tumble downwards, her weight transferring forwards. He knew if she continued in her trajectory it was going to be a rotational, and a bad one at that. Her back legs scrambled desperately midair against the bars and the spectators all gasped unanimously, waiting for the impact. Somehow, and Yuri would never know by what miracle they were saved, she managed to find her feet upon landing after stumbling around for a few strides with her head almost on the ground and her legs flailing madly. He could feel that she'd lost a good bit of her confidence from this and that he needed to bring it right back for the Corral or he was for it. 'Good girl,' He soothed, reaching forwards to pat her as they galloped down to the tricky complex. 'You've got this.' She lengthened her stride a little more in solidarity with his reassaurances and heaved herself up the hill, grunting as she forced herself over the rails at the top. He collected her up and slowed her right down for the next part of the combination, making sure she kept her balance and could see the line clearly out of the complex. She hadn't quite got to grips with the whole 'locking onto a fence' thing but she was getting better with each outing, and today she was firing up all engines and was instantly transfixed by the Event Mobility Dining Table. She gave him a beautiful feel over it and went charging along on landing down to what was definitely one of the more demanding series of fences in the course. She was tiring fast and Yuri could sense that she wasn't quite as responsive as she ought to be coming over the first of the Joules Corners, but a strong, sweet kick and check with the reins got her head back where it ought to be- namely, in the game. She flew the last two with surprising ease and seemed to be having a second wind, her little legs chuntering away beneath her and eating up the ground. Yuri checked his watch and saw that they were slightly behind schedule. Once they were past the tricky Irish Horse Gateway Hunstmans Close he picked up the speed a notch, not having wanted her to tire out too much before that particular combination. The World Horse Welfare Gates were a breath of fresh air after some of the stickier moments they'd had and then they finally reached The Quarry. They soared over the first fence and then going down the hill felt like the world had dropped out from under their feet. He swallowed hard and forced himself to kick on up the hill. Fluffy's strides slowed down massively and it felt so painfully steady that it was nigh unthinkable that they'd ever make it. By some miracle, however, they were past it after a few troublesome seconds and a commendable effort by Agape. Within moments they were galloping along the homestretch towards the penultimate fence and by this point Yuri was panting so hard for breath he wasn't sure his heart was going to stay intact. He couldn't even think about how exhausted his poor horse had to be. Despite his difficulty in even seeing anything other than blurred shapes he rode on and ignored the trees that were only in place to bemuse and distract the rider on the approach to the penultimate fence. He just had to get past this and then he was in the stadium... Just this fence and he was almost home and dry. He could feel Fluffy really beginning to tire and a quick check of his watch told him that she didn't have room to slow down for even a second. 'Just two more,' He promised her, chucking his reins forwards and revving her up for one last push. He would be naive to think that he could maintain her health at this level after this event was over. This was their last hurrah at the top tracks and then he'd step it down, maybe let some little kid back at Hasetsu ride her in smaller shows and learn on her. She'd done so much for him, more than could ever have been expected of her, and the fact that this was his last chance to do her justice kept the pressure on to the last. He tore into the stadium at breakneck speed and blinked hard to dispel the haze creeping across his vision. It was unreal that they'd been clear so far- beyond what he'd hoped for. In all honesty, he'd always known it was too much to ask of a 14.3hh to go round this track. It was the impossible, but he was doing it. He was, astonishingly, clear so far. He couldn't lose focus now though- not with so much at stake. This last fence was the final cross country fence at this height for them in competition and he was determined to make it count. He could hear the crowd's raucous calling already and he caught a glimpse of his loyal supporters- and Victor- on the other side, waiting to lead away his horse and hose her off. He was physically trembling with fatigue and it was a wonder he could stand in his stirrups at all as they rounded in on the last few strides. Then it all went very, very quiet. The crowd dissipated and all that was in his line of sight was the final jump. All he could hear was the sound of his own stertorous breathing matching Fluffy's heavy hoof-fall. She was floundering a little and he could feel her legs begin to straighten in preparation for a stop. 'Don't you dare,' He snapped, smacking her hard on the shoulder and kicking on defiantly. The clock was ticking down and he couldn't afford to have anything go wrong. He kept his heels digging firmly into her sides right up until the moment she took off. She landed with a heavy grunt and almost fell to her knees with the tremendous strain she was under. Yuri, unable to think for even a moment about anything other than getting past that damn finish line within the time, yelled at her to move and she obeyed. It was like she knew exactly what he was thinking, and that this was their last gravity-defying feat of brilliance. She kept on galloping right through the flags and Yuri punched the air ecstatically, falling onto her neck and almost sobbing for joy and relief. He could barely breathe when Victor and Yuuri fluttered to his side and gasped their congratulations, let alone reply. He allowed himself to be led from the arena down to the cooloff area, where he promptly dismounted and drank half a gallon of water as his horse was drenched with cold water and then covered up with an exquisitely embroidered mesh rug. He was just walking down to the trailer park when Clare Balding dashed up with her microphone. 'Yuri Plisetsky!' She beamed at him and he forced a strained smile. He was mentally finished and he couldn't help but think he'd rather skip the interview. A quick look at Victor's intent expression warded him off of running away. 'That was history made right there. How did you feel your round went?' 'I'm so proud,' He gushed, patting Fluffy on the neck and grinning into the cameras directed at his face. 'She gave me such a good ride and got me out of some really tricky moments, I couldn't have asked any more of her.' 'You're breaking two esteemed records here today- you're both the youngest rider and riding the small horse. Do you think that Badminton is about to be taken over by a younger generation?' 'Nobody's as good as me,' He declared breezily and Clare laughed. 'Thank you very much, and a massive well done. Brilliant round.' 'Thank you,' He nodded and then they were finally able to return to the stables, where Fluffy was quickly put away and given a bucket of water after she'd stopped panting. 'That was bloody impressive,' Victor clapped Yuri on the shoulder, making him wince. 'I have to say, I didn't even think you'd make it past the first fence.' 'I proved you wrong,' Yuri raised an eyebrow, pulling off his hat and air jacket to put them away. 'I think you owe me an apology.' 'For what? Calling Fluffy a glorified bog pony?' 'No, for saying that like it's a bad thing.' 'Oh. Sorry, I suppose.' Yuri harrumphed, upset that he didn't get a proper apology, but he knew it was the best he would get and he ought to settle for it before the words were rescinded. 'I'm so proud of you,' Yuuri counteracted his fiancé's shortcomings by throwing an arm round Yuri's shoulder and hugging him tightly. 'You did incredibly. I'm so glad you could finally do what you wanted, and that you did it so well!' 'Thanks,' Yuri mumbled, going a little pink. They stood around for a while until Otabek showed up, sweeping Yuri off of his feet and planting a celebratory kiss right on his lips for all the crowds to see. A bit of cheering commenced and Yuri went even redder, covering his face with his still-gloved hands and retreating behind Victor, who was more than happy to soak up the attention. Eventually the crowd subsided and they could talk freely. 'How did you do?' Yuri turned to Otabek, who imparted the knowledge that he'd had two stupid stops at Outlander Bank which had ensured he was dropped from contention. In spite of this, he was overjoyed to be amongst the 13 who had successfully completed the course so far. Yuri was one of just 4 clears, and so far only the 2nd to finish it within the time. 'Showjumping tomorrow,' He remarked, much to Victor's joy. This was the part he most looked forward to- he understood it, although he was shocked by the laziness of some of the horses when it came to the less solid fences. The next day would bring its own challenges and difficulties, but for now Yuri was happy in the knowledge that he'd done his best and that his best had been bloody brilliant.

#yuri on ice #yuri katsuki #yuri plisetsky #yuuri katsuki #yuri on ice fanfic #otabek altin #otabek x yurio #otayuri #victor nikiforov #viktor nikiforov #victuuri #viktuuri

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