#rose shepard-vakarian

[anaiqn]

I need to interact with people who likes - Vampire Academy - Dragon Age - Mass Effect

[heroofshield]

Whumpcember Day 24- Bullet (Mass Effect Shakarian)

@whumpcember

Rose Shepard didn't know who this 'Archangel' was, but was willing to admit they were one hell of a shot. She watched as two more Blue Sun's went down and was impressed.

"I can see why the Illusive Man wants them on the team." she thought as she made sure no one was looking before sabotaging the mech that was going to be used later on. Slipping back out, she saw that more mercenaries had fallen and her curiosity as to who Archangel was grew.

"Russo, you and your team are up." the head of the Blue Sun's said in his gruff voice.

It took a second for Rose to remember the fake name she'd given when trying to get recruited but then she nodded and nodded to Mordin and Miranda, pulling out her Avenger and wishing she had her usual N7 armor on, but knew it would have given her away. "And I'm supposed to be keeping a low profile as it is."

Running towards the concrete cover, she paused to make sure Archangel wasn't going for her. When it remained silent, she risked a glance over the barrier but nothing happened. Signalling her team, they leapt out of cover and started to run towards the hideout's entrance.

They were halfway there when the sniper rifle firing sounded and Rose automatically pushed her biotics out, creating a shield around her and the others. It lasted for only a few seconds, she wasn't that powerful of a biotic, but it was long enough to stop the bullet from hitting anyone. Continuing onward, they entered the hideout and up the stairs to finally see who Archangel was.

"Garrus!?" Rose the surprise in her voice clear as she stopped short when Archangel turned around and got a good look.

--

"What's this?" Garrus asked, looking at the all but flattened bullet that was displayed behind the plexiglass in Shepard's quarters.

Rose looked up to see what Garrus was looking at. "That? It's the bullet from when you took a potshot shot at me on Omega."

"I remember that, but do you have the bullet? I thought you destroyed it with your biotics."

Rose let out a laugh and set the datapad on the table before standing and moving towards Garrus. "I'm not that strong of a biotic. I just flattened it enough."

"And how did you find it? Once the mech showed up it got kind of hectic."

"I went back on one of our stops there. The merc's had long cleared out by that time and no one had really cleaned up. Found it and figured it'd bring me some luck since you clearly missed."

Garrus let out a chuckle and gently ran his talon's through Shepard's hair. "Well hopefully it'll bring us all luck once we go through the Omega Relay."

"With you here, I'm sure it will." Rose smiled and leaned against Garrus, wrapping her arms around him and feeling that comforting warmth spread through her body as he did the same.

[tarysande]

There are a couple more Garrus-Vakarian-related hills I'm willing to die on.

Maybe this particular bit of fanon has faded over the years, but there used to be a lot of insistence that Garrus is young and somehow inexperienced when he meets Shepard. Canon doesn't really support this. Turians start their mandatory service at 15. Garrus has at least a decade of experience. Even if he's 2-4 of years younger than Shepard (according to Patrick Weekes), he's got at least as much field experience as she does by dint of the difference in turian and human "enlistment" ages.

Garrus is really damn good at his job at C-Sec. You don't give the Case of Investigating the Rogue Spectre to a greenhorn. You give it to your best, most tenacious agent. Pallin may not always approve of Garrus's actions, but that doesn't actually stop him from putting Garrus on the tough case. Also, we don't know much about how C-Sec works but we do know a bit about how the turian hierarchy works, and we know C-Sec was essentially a turian initiative. That means it's a meritocracy where failure reflects on the superior, not the one who failed. So, in roughly a decade (Shepard's 29 in ME1; I always think of Garrus as about 27), Garrus has not only done shipboard military service, but he's also risen to be one of C-Sec's top investigators; Pallin wouldn't risk having Garrus's "failure" reflect poorly on HIM otherwise. I'd say that actually makes Garrus as remarkable in civilian law enforcement terms as Shepard is considered to be within the ranks of the Alliance military.

Of course Garrus was scouted by the Spectre program. And honestly, if his dad hadn't stepped in, I think Garrus would have become a Spectre, no problem. Especially for a turian, he's cut from precisely the cloth the Spectres would be looking for: extremely skilled, extremely capable, and--most importantly--he's a turian not just able but willing to work outside the chains of command that turians are taught from birth to revere and be loyal to above all else. This is the reason Pallin is leery about Spectres: he's a good turian. Good turians follow straight lines; they don't carve out their own paths.

Garrus's dad's not dumb, and he's not cruel, and he, too, rose to the top of the C-Sec hierarchy. He took one look at his kid, I think, and said, "I love my child, but I'd say it's a 50-50 chance he ends up a shooting-first-asking-questions-later Spectre like Saren Arterius, and I don't want to see that happen." Yeah, he uses his parental influence to try and jam square-peg-Garrus into round-hole-C-Sec and Garrus resents him for it, but there's no way he did it just to stop his son from getting his way or because he doesn't like Spectres. I expect Vakarian Sr. had to clean up more post-Spectre-interference messes than we can possibly imagine. But we also know he and Alec Ryder were pals later.

So the importance of what Garrus learns from a Paragon Spectre Shepard is this: You can't just do what you want and claim the ends always justify the means. That's what Saren does. Over and over again. Garrus's code and his idealism and his sense of justice and his ability to work alone should make him a great Spectre, actually, but he needs Paragon Spectre Shepard's actions to show him the lesson he tells her he's learned during ME1: "If the people I'm sworn to protect can't trust me... well, then I don't deserve to be the one protecting them." (And the seed of Archangel was planted.) I think for the first time he realizes that even though he believes his sense of justice to be correct, it doesn't matter for shit if he can't show others why that's so. And that's where the trust comes in. (Also, ow, the extra level of importance this gives their exchange where she tells him she trusts him and he tells her she's about the only friend he has left is... a lot. Cool, cool. I'm totally fine. Nothing to see here.)

When Shepard asks him what happened on Omega, he replies, "My feelings got in the way of my better judgement." Something tells me that this never happens to "good" turians, which just makes the line so much more devastating. And although the lesson some might take away from this is "feelings bad; no feelings ever," the "grey" that Garrus has to learn to deal with is precisely the grey of recognizing feelings, validating them even, but not acting on them until they've been examined. (Which is why my Shepard stands between him and Sidonis; she doesn't give a shit about Sidonis. But Garrus has refused to process his own feelings of failure and self-loathing, so they have to take the therapy session to the Citadel and deal with it there.)

Ahh yes. The mountain range of character analysis.

[strawberrykidneystone]

Interspecies Liason

garrus vakarian x female shepard fluff

summary: after being gone on Omega on a solo mission away from the crew to help aria, shepard needed a break. luckily, the 7 foot turian she was thinking about was waiting for her in her cabin.

a/n: i literally tried to romance someone else the second time i played mass effect but i just ended up with garrus again LMAO

tags: fluff, shepard is tired, ooc bc garrus says i love you before the end, cuddling

ao3 version

after dealing with cerberus and resisting shooting petrovsky in the head for the bullshit he was spewing about them someday being friends, shepard needed a distraction before they headed back out to save the galaxy again. she boarded the Normandy again and nodded tiredly to traynor as she hastily made her way into the elevator. she pulled off her headpiece and started peeling off her armor as the lift rose up to her cabin, leaving her in a tank top and armored bottoms as she held the discarded attire in her arms. the elevator dinged and she crossed the small corridor, the weight of her shoulders dropping slightly as the door opened up to the familiar space that she had made her own.

but there was an "intruder" in her room.

fortunately, it was just the turian she wanted to see.

he had his back to her as he was adjusting her bedding, it looked like he had changed her sheets and comforter cover while she was off on her mission. her shoulders relaxed as a warm smile tugged on her lips. garrus wasn't always good with his words, but he knew how to show that he cared for her through other means. he brought extra pillows from his own bed, he rarely slept in his room anymore and shepard was more than happy to have him in her cabin. he wasn't in his usual armor, instead, he was wearing his green and blue loungewear over his plates.

shepard quietly walked up to him from behind and wrapped her arms around his torso, nuzzling her cheek into his soft shirt, "hey there big guy."

her thumbs ran up and down his sides as he chuckled, his chest humming happily. he rested his arms over hers and his blunt talons brushed against her skin, "you're back."

he turned around in her arms to face her and cupped her face with his hands, his eyes quickly darting over her to make sure that she wasn't injured. as his eyes ran over her body, he saw that she was already in the process of getting undressed. his mandibles quirked up with an expression that she had come to know as a teasing one, "couldn't even wait until you were in the room to get undressed for me? how unbecoming of you commander."

shepard groaned and shook her head, leaning her forehead against his chest, "we finally got all the gangs on our side, i know the backstreets of omega a little too well for my liking."

garrus placed his hand on back of her head and petted her hair softly, his other hand rested on her hip. "you did good shepard, now it's time to get some rest."

"but-"

"no buts, the galaxy can wait a bit. even the great commander shepard needs rest."

shepard sighed in defeat and nodded, looking up at him. garrus leaned his head down and pressed his forehead against hers, closing his eyes in contentment. his hand moved from her hip and started rubbing her back, his thumb moving in circles every so often. shepard's posture softened as she hugged his waist, pulling him as close to her as possible while still keeping his forehead against hers, reveling in the turian's traditional kiss.

"come on, lets get you to bed sweetheart," garrus leaned down and pressed his lip plates against shepard's soft lips. she smiled into the kiss and pulled away, stripping down her armored pants which left her in her tank top and underwear.

garrus pulled her to their shared bed by her hand, falling back and pulling her on top of him. she quickly clung to him and closed her eyes, letting herself relax. shepard tried to forget about the reapers, the galaxy relying on her, the alliances she still needed to make, and all the lives lost, god it was all just too much sometimes.

but then, she looked up at garrus and it all seemed to melt away. he was here with her at this moment and that was enough. he was her world, everything else didn't matter while she was safe in his arms.

"i love you vakarian."

"i love you too shepard."

[continuous-spec]

Here's a snippet of Chapter 5!

Shepard rubbed her arm where she had been pricked as she walked out to the waiting room. Garrus sat going over a datapad, busying himself. The green and yellow suit still left much to be desired. But she felt her vision clear slightly, opening her left eye for the first time that day. Shepard couldn't help but note he at least looked better out of C-Sec's bulky armor. "So trust me to go on my own this time? Promise I won't be late. Finch isn't as forgiving," Shepard said.  "Again, it's up to you if you still want to work with me," Garrus retorted.  "Only if you change out of your "I'm not a cop' outfit." Garrus' brow rose in a look of confusion, looking down at the brightly colored outfit. "This is my best suit." "Nice to know you wear your Sunday best to stakeouts, Vakarian." "What do clothes have to do with days?" He asked in an unamused tone.  "Never mind, maybe just find something in a darker shade? Black and white. Those colors would fit you better for Chora's." Garrus flicked out his mandibles in response, almost as if he were annoyed. "Fine, I'll be early to get situated too." "Try to snag a seat by the back doors near the strippers." "You take me to such lovely places," Garrus deadpanned while ushering them out of the clinic back into the sparse ward.  "Spas, strip clubs. Let's try out a casino next." "On C-Sec's dime?" Garrus asked jokingly. "You catch on quick. A casino is better than a clinic any day, even if the doctors are so caring." Shepard placed emphasis on the last word.  "Well, Dr. Michel is one of the good doctors on the ward and helps as much as she can. She's been a good friend over the years," Garrus said innocently, not understanding what Shepard's inflection implied.  "Friend?" Shepard asked, her eyebrow raised up, trying to coax more information out of him. She was having too much fun with it.  "Yeah, she's kept insisting for years about owing me a favor after helping with a blackmail case. About time I used it."  "Oh, she owes you something, alright," Shepard laughed, pulling up her omni-tool.  "What do you mean?" Garrus asked, head cocked to the side. Shepard again tried to stifle another laugh. So he didn't know that the doc was totally into him.  "Oh, nothing," Shepard said with a smirk while activating her cloak. "I hate when you do that."  "See you at Chora's, preferably in a new outfit," Shepard said, already running off towards a public shuttle. 

Read the rest on Ao3 :)

[seigephoenix]

Kinktober 2024: Blindfold

Just 8 days left in October! I'll have my Kinktober set to reblog all day, ending with the finale of the "Don't Say a Word" fic for Halloween. After that, expect lots of Dragon Age: Veilguard stuff popping up (with proper tags of course).

Ship: Rhys Shepard x Garrus Vakarian Content Warning: sass, p in v sex, description of alien anatomy, fingering Length: 2.8k

Rhys Shepard was many things but survivors was at the top of that list.  She wasn’t known as the most diplomatic soldier in the Alliance Navy, which was why top brass tended to keep her out of the front lines.  Though that had been blown to hell and back when she’d encountered that Prothean artifact during that fucked up mission with Nihlus.  Her methods weren’t universally loved because she didn’t care if someone was human so long as they got shit done.  Her rough exterior was enough to scare most people off, and she preferred it that way.  Letting people close let them hurt you, and she’d be damned if she’d be vulnerable in front of anyone again.  Until she died and was given a second chance.  Rhys swore she wouldn’t squander that chance, not when she knew what was coming.  So she gathered her crew and swore to take the fight to the Collectors.

Commander Quarters

Rhys leaned back on her couch as she studied the smooth metal ceiling.  She’d just gotten out of the shower and her towel draped around her neck.  For once she let her midnight hair down from the tight bun falling over her shoulders in damp waves.  She ran a hand through it and shook her head at the onyx strands that flowed through her fingers like water.  The only thing she wouldn’t do was cut her hair; she’d put it into the tightest bun in the platoon but cutting it was out of the question.  She dropped her hand to the couch as she sighed.  “I fucked up again.”  She’d spoken to Garrus and left feeling like she’d done something wrong.  They’d just confronted Sidonis, and while she normally would be all for the ruthless options…  Something in her knew that doing so would break Garrus.  Rhys was used to shouldering those burdens but she didn’t think Garrus was nor did she want him too.

She recognized the burning hatred in his eyes, hell she’d felt it herself many times.  The only reason she survived so long during that assault was pure hatred.  Rhys wished she could help him, but she’d never known the right words to say to anyone let alone to someone she cared about.  Her pale green eyes cut to the door when it slid open.  Her eyes narrowed at that.  She wasn’t expecting anyone and EDI hadn’t given her any warning about her guest.  If it was Miranda again wanting to talk about plans, Rhys wasn’t sure what she’d do.  To her shock, Garrus walked through the door looking behind him as the door slid closed with a quiet hiss.

“Garrus?” Rhys asked quietly as she slowly got to her feet.  She realized she wasn’t wearing pants!  Rhys hadn’t expected any company for the evening.  “Wait a minute,” she said as she stepped towards the bathroom.  Rhys jumped when his hand reached out and blocked her.  She cut a glance over to him but realized he wouldn’t be bothered by her going without pants.  Not as if turians found humans that sexy, if she was being honest with herself, she wasn’t the epitome of femme fatale either.  “Sorry, what can I help you with?”

Rhys didn’t move as he stepped closer to her but her heart did start racing.  They’d shared that one night but it had been more like clumsy fumbling than anything else.  Garrus had been avoiding her since.  Rhys wouldn’t admit it hurt; she’d rather bite off her tongue.  Garrus simply stared at her and Rhys felt the hairs on the back of her neck rise in alarm.  She ducked and avoided the hand that reached out for her.  “Jesus, what the hell is going on Garrus?” Rhys demanded as she stepped away.

“Commander, do you require assistance?” EDI asked through the speaker and Rhys sighed and rubbed the back of her head, heedless of the way her shirt rose over her stomach.

“No EDI.  I can handle it just fine.  Don’t call in the cavalry please, I’d rather not have Miranda or the others catch me without pants.”  EDI gave the affirmation and the silence descended again.  “Now, care to explain what the hell you’re on about this time Vakarian?”

“You’ve been avoiding me,” he said and Rhys huffed.

“You were the one who bit my head off when I went to talk to you the morning after.”  Rhys waved dismissively as she crossed her arms under her breasts.  The urge to spit an insult rested on her tongue but she held it.  This was Garrus.  “I figured that you sated your curiosity and that was it.  Humans weren’t attractive to you and I understood.”  She turned away from him and towards her bed where she reached for her hair tie.  Rhys yelped when hands shoved her to the bed, she landed on her hands and knees.  She paused as her hair swung down over her shoulders, assessing to make sure what happened did happen.

“Vakarian…”  She spun around but his hand closed over her ankle.

“Mordin told me that humans have ways to show trust in the bedroom.  Is that true Shepard?”  Rhys stopped fighting him and looked up at him.

“That’s what you want to ask?”  He nodded and held her gaze before she dropped her head back to the bed.  “Ugh, yes.  There are certain ways to show complete trust in your partner in the bedroom.  That humans do, I mean.  I assume turians have similar things?” Rhys sat up and pulled her legs under her when he released her ankle.

“Something like that.  Most turians go into sex knowing it’s not going to be something that will hurt the other.”  Rhys wanted to roll her eyes but she resisted.

“Did Mordin tell you any of these trust activities?” Rhys asked as she propped her elbow on her knee when Garrus sat next to her on the bed.

“No.  He said I should ask you.”  Rhys cast a skeptical glance at him but she sighed.

“Well, there’s plenty.  There’s giving your partner total control over you.  How your body moves, tying them up, giving orders, not letting them orgasm until you say so, and then there’s smaller things.  Blindfolds are a basic activity to build trust.” Rhys told him plainly.

“Blindfolds?  You willingly do that with your partners?”

“It takes a lot to get me to bend for it, but yeah, I’ve done it before.  We assume that if we’re going to be blindfolded that we won’t be stabbed in the back by our partners.  For me, I don’t like leaving myself so unguarded.  It takes a lot of trust for me to let someone put a blindfold on me, it makes me nervous when I can’t see.  Thanks to Akuze.”  Garrus paused at her words.  She could sense the hesitation in him and looked over at her nightstand.  She grabbed the tie she’d kept from her dress blues.  Not that she had any occasion to wear them in the near future, so what better way to put it to use.  The material was a smooth silk that flowed over her fingers.

“What are you doing Shepard?”  Rhys wanted to laugh at how nervous he sounded.

“Relax Vakarian.  I’m just grabbing my tie.  It can double as a blindfold.  When your sight is cut off all the other senses become sharper to compensate.”  She let the silky material slide over her hands again and she wanted to grin as his eyes followed the movements.  “I’m guessing your conversation with Mordin was because you wanted to ask about us doing something like this?”

“I meant what I said Shepard.  You’re one of the few people I respect the hell out of in this galaxy.  I wanted to know how to make you feel good.”  Rhys felt her heart soften and she reached over to trail her fingers along the side of his face, falling away at the end of his mandibles.

“You could have just asked me.  Mordin can tell you all day long about sexual positions and orgasms and all that shit.  Doesn’t mean a damn thing.  Most humans are wired the same way biologically.  Sex to us is a lot more than just put tab A into slot B.”  Garrus looked down at her curiously.  “A lot of time it takes more atmosphere as you found from last time.  Typically, I’m not the kind of gal you wine and dine.  I’m happy with a romp in the sack to relieve tension.”

“But I want to make you see yourself like I do.”  Rhys paused at his words and looked up at him.  His hand reached out and stroked her hair, letting the strands cling to his rough skin before falling away.  Rhys felt the vulnerability trying to slip in and she fought desperately against it.  She wanted to lean into him and just let him make her forget everything.

“Alright then.  We can give this a try.  From my understanding, the Normandy is going to dock for repairs so there’s no mission that requires my attention tomorrow.  So we have the time.”  Rhy lifted the silk tie and slid it over her face, knotting it easily to make it snug.  She took a calming breath and reminded herself she was with Garrus.  “Alright.  I can’t see anything.”  She grinned when she felt his hand waving in front of her face.  “I can’t see your hand but I can feel it moving,” she said with a smile.

Rhys sucked in a breath when his hand rested against her breast.  The last time he hadn’t paid much attention to them, but not this time.  Her head fell back when he squeezed hissing when her nipple pebbled against the palm of his hand.  A needy whimper escaped when he gently pinched her nipple, she could tell how cautious he was being.  “I’m not made of glass Garrus,” she said sensing the way he stiffened.  “A little roughness isn’t going to break me.”  Rhys squealed when her back hit the bed followed by a laugh as he knelt between her legs.  He eased his hands up between her thighs feeding the ache throbbing in her body.

She lifted her hips when he hooked his fingers in the sides of her underwear, shuddering when he pulled them away from her.  Rhys suppressed the whine when his thumbs caressed the inside of her knees.  She wanted his hands on her and driving her wild until she forgot this whole damn mission.  He slid his hands down her thighs, skimming over her trembling core, before tugging her tank top off her.  Rhys huffed as she propped up on her elbows.  “You’re enjoying this aren’t you?”

“Having the galaxy’s most badass Commander at my mercy?  No, of course I’m not enjoying this.”  He leaned in and nibbled at her shoulder, earning a soft moan from her lips.  She groaned as her walls squeezed around nothing when his tongue soothed the sting.

“Sarcasm doesn’t, ah, doesn’t become you,” she moaned.  His hands slid around and cupped her ass squeezing the soft skin.  His talons scraped against her leaving trails of white hot heat behind.  His tongue reached out and teased her nipple until it was a hardened point beneath him.  Rhys let out a keening whimper when he nipped the side of her breast.  Garrus slid one hand between her legs, chuckling when he felt her thighs squeeze his arm to lock it in place.

He rested his palm against her clit, just one tiny push and she’d get the friction she needed.  Rhys rocked her hips against his hand, whining when the spike of heat burst low in her belly.  “Yes.”  Garrus paused at the soft word and she whimpered.  “Don’t stop.  Please.”

Garrus leaned in and Rhys was surrounded by him.  She’d never get tired of his scent.  Gun oil and the sharp sting of smell right before a thunderstorm hit.  Her hands reached for him as she curled into him with his palm grinding down on her clit.  Her fingers curled over the chitin layering over the softer layers of his skin, desperate for something to cling to at the pleasure haze that threatened to consume her mind.  Her toes curled into the blanket as the pleasure built higher and higher, threatening to explode.  She clenched her jaw on another needy whimper for more.

“Rhys.”  Garrus’s low voice was right in her ear.  A keening moan escaped when he slid a finger inside of her body.  She felt his subvocals against her body when her walls squeezed his finger.  She trailed her fingers down over his chest, memorizing the shape and feel of him.  She brushed over the plate that protected his cock and eased it to the side.  He growled when she palmed his cock.

Her fingers wrapped around him, marveling at how different he was.  Turgid and wide.  Rhys wondered how it fit the last time.  Her lips parted on a needy sigh when his finger curled inside of her.  Her head dropped back as the heat broke inside of her.  Her thighs squeezed tight around his arm, the moans coming through clenched teeth as it crashed through her in a violent wave.  Rhys fell backwards after the last wave ebbed and laid there catching her breath.  She sensed him shifting and she grabbed his arm.

“Not yet.”  She flipped over onto her stomach and reached for the lubricant in her nightstand.  Even as wet as she was there was no way she was risking it.  “We’re not done yet Garrus.”  She handed the bottle over to him and raised her ass in the air towards him.  A universal sign she hoped.

Rhys grabbed a pillow to hold.  A sharp cry escaped when his cock slid inside.  Her fingers twisted in the sheets as the subtle ridges along the sides of his cock hit just right.  Her sensitive walls tightened around his cock until he was fully inside her.  His talons grabbed her waist, digging into the soft skin.  Rhys knew she’d have bruises later.  She rocked back against him, relishing the low growl from him.  Rhys pitched forward when he slammed into her deep.  Her lips parted on whimpers for him to go faster, go harder.  She didn’t even care that he was seeing the scars from Akuze, something she never showed anyone.  All she could focus on was how good his cock felt inside of her.

Tiny stabs of pain at her hips merely heightened the pleasure clouding her mind.  Garrus leaned over her, letting his body rub against hers with each thrust.  He reached under her to squeeze her breast in time to his thrusts.  His other hand slipped between her legs to tease her clit.  She was going to go crazy.  Her head thrashed at the heat building low in her belly again.  His subvocals were rumbling against her back each time his cock hit deep inside of her.

“You know what I want Rhys,” he murmured right against her ear.  “So go ahead and give it to me.”  Rhys whimpered when his finger massaged her clit, keeping her skirting the edge when all she wanted was to throw herself into the abyss.

“I.  Please.”  Rhys couldn’t string two words together, she merely rocked back to meet his thrusts.  Sweat dripped down her forehead, plastering her hair to her temple.  Her fingers curled into the sheets as the sweet tension built to a breaking point.  “Fuck, Garrus.”  Rhys moaned as her walls fluttered around his cock with each wave of heat that rolled through her.  Her first orgasm had been like a tempest battering a beach, this orgasm was slow as molasses in winter.  Rhys savored each spasm of pleasure moaning only a little when Garrus pulled out of her.  She knew why he did it, but she so desperately wanted to feel him come inside of her.

Rhys struggled to get her breathing back to normal as she laid on her bed limply.  She didn’t have the energy to move at the moment and wasn’t keen on doing so either.  She jumped a little when his hands tugged the blindfold off.  “I see by your expression that you enjoyed that?”

“Hmm.  Don’t make it a habit Vakarian.” Rhys grinned as he huffed at her.  “Come on.”  She turned her head to look at him and extended a hand to him.  Garrus grasped hers in his and grunted when she tugged him down to the bed.  Before he could get his bearings, she was already tucked up against him.  One leg thrown over his hips, and her arms wrapped around his neck.

“You can’t be comfortable like that…”  Rhys huffed.

“I’ve slept in worse conditions than this.  Now, let’s get some sleep Vakarian.  We can talk tomorrow morning when I’m able to string words together.”  Garrus didn’t comment on her sarcasm, but he shifted until his arm draped across her waist.  They had plenty of time to talk about it, and to his surprise he looked forward to it.

[shinyasahalo]

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(F/M) Captain Hook | Killian Jones/Emma Swan (Once Upon a Time TV) 12,350 fics

(F/M) Padme Amidala/Anakin Skywalker | Darth Vader (Prequel Trilogy/Star Wars) 10,459 fics

(F/M) Jaime Lannister/Brienne of Tarth (Game of Thrones TV/Song of Ice and Fire) 10,270 fics

(F/M) Belle/Rumplestiltskin | Mr Gold (Once Upon a Time TV) 10,253 fics

(F/M) Midoriya Izuku/Uraraka Ochako (MHA) 10,168 fics

(F/M) Sherlock Holmes/Molly Hooper (Sherlock TV) 9,713 fics

(F/M) Hermione Granger/Severus Snape (Harry Potter) 9,625 fics

(F/M) Female Inquisitor/Cullen Rutherford (Dragon Age) 9,008 fics

(F/M) Hermione Granger/Harry Potter (Harry Potter) 8,839 fics

(F/M) Allison Argent/Scott McCall (Teen Wolf TV) 8,788 fics

(F/M) Haruno Sakura/Uchiha Sasuke (Naruto) 8,473 fics

(F/M) Jon Snow/Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones TV/Song of Ice and Fire) 8,295 fics

(F/M) Link/Zelda (Legend of Zelda) 8,218 fics

(F/M) Leo Fitz/Jemma Simmons (Agents of SHIELD TV/Marvel) 8,118 fics

(F/M) Chloe Decker/Lucifer Morningstar (Lucifer TV) 8,045 fics

(F/M) Michelle Jones/Peter Parker (Spider-Man/Marvel) 8,032 fics

(F/M) Katniss Everdeen/Peeta Mellark (The Hunger Games) 7,999 fics

(F&M) Robin Buckley & Steve Harrington (Stranger Things TV) 7,963 fics

(F/M) Katara/Zuko (Avatar Last Airbender) 7,761 fics

(F/M) Alya Cesaire | Rena Rouge/Nino Lahiffe | Carapace (Miraculous Ladybug) 7,625 fics

(F&M) Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir & Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug (Miraculous Ladybug) 7,573 fics

(F&M) Rey & Ben Solo | Kylo Ren (Sequel Trilogy/Star Wars) 7,530 fics

(F/M) Bakugou Katsuki/Uraraka Ochako (MHA) 7,524 fics

(F/M) Olivia Benson/Elliot Stabler (Law and Order SVU TV) 7,435 fics

(F/M) Tim Bradford/Lucy Chen (The Rookie TV) 7,293 fics

(F/M) Female Inquisitor/Solas (Dragon Age) 7,289 fics

(F/M) Peggy Carter/Steve Rogers (Agent Carter TV/Marvel) 7,241 fics

(F/M) Leia Organa/Han Solo (Original Trilogy/Star Wars) 6,957 fics

(F/M) Lucius Malfoy/Narcissa Black Malfoy (Harry Potter) 6,868 fics

(F/M) Spike/Buffy Summers (Buffy the Vampire Slayers TV) 6,854 fics

(F/M) Sam Carter/Jack O'Neill (Stargate SG-1 TV) 6,725 fics

(F&M) Midoriya Inko & Midoriya Izuku (MHA) 6,702 fics

(F/M) Jessica Moore/Sam Winchester (Supernatural TV) 6,568 fics

(F/M) Steve Rogers/Natasha Romanov (Avengers/Marvel) 6,490 fics

(F/M) Betty Cooper/Jughead Jones (Riverdale TV/Archie Comics) 6,438 fics

(F/M) Chakotay/Kathryn Janeway (Star Trek Voyager TV) 6,431 fics

(F&M) Clint Barton & Natasha Romanov (Avengers/Marvel) 6,403 fics

(F/M) Female Lavellan/Solas (Dragon Age) 6,317 fics

(F/M) James "Bucky" Barnes/Natasha Romanov (Avengers/Marvel) 6,313 fics

(F/M) Mary Morstan/John Watson (Sherlock TV) 6,279 fics

(F/M) Gendry/Arya Stark (Game of Thrones TV/Song of Ice and Fire) 6,185 fics

(F/M) Eleven | Jane Hopper/Mike Wheeler (Stranger Things TV) 6,165 fics

(F/M) Female Shepard/Garrus Vakarian (Mass Effect) 6,115 fics

(F/M) The Darkling | Aleksander Morozova/Alina Starkov (Shadow and Bone TV/Grishaverse) 6,090 fics

(F/M) Jane Foster/Thor (Thor Movies/Marvel) 6,042 fics

(F/M) Colin Bridgerton/Penelope Featherington (Bridgerton TV) 5,935 fics

(F/M) James "Bucky" Barnes/Original Female Character (Marvel) 5,933 fics

(F/M) Daemon Targaryen/Rhaenyra Targaryen (House of the Dragon TV/Song of Ice and Fire) 5,918 fics

(F/M) Wanda Maximoff/Vision (WandaVision TV/Marvel) 5,865 fics

(F/M) Jon Snow/Daenerys Targaryen (Game of Thrones TV/Song of Ice and Fire) 5,806 fics

(F&M) Anakin Skywalker | Darth Vader & Ahsoka Tano (The Clone Wars/Star Wars) 5,652 fics

(F/M) Loki/Original Female Character (Marvel) 5,456 fics

(F/M) Kaz Brekker/Inef Ghafa (Six of Crows/Grishaverse) 5,393 fics

(F&M) Aunt May Parker & Peter Parker (Spider-Man/Marvel) 5,370 fics

(F/M) Dean Winchester/Original Female Character (Supernatural TV) 5,301 fics

(F/M) Riza Hawkeye/Roy Mustang (Fullmetal Alchemist) 5,269 fics

(F/M) Selina Kyle/Bruce Wayne (Batman/DCU) 5,246 fics

(F/M) Barry Allen/Iris West (The Flash TV/DCU) 5,213 fics

(F/M) Guinevere/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin TV/Arthurian Mythology) 5,166 fics

(F&M) Midoriya Izuku & Uraraka Ochako (MHA) 5,162 fics

(F/M) Vernon Boyd/Erica Reyes (Teen Wolf TV) 5,128 fics

(F/M) Hyuuga Hinata/Uzumaki Naruto (Naruto) 5,047 fics

(F/M) Edward Cullen/Bella Swan (Twilight) 5,034 fics

(F/M) Maxine "Max" Mayfield/Lucas Sinclair (Stranger Things TV) 5,026 fics

(F/M) Mikasa Ackerman/Eren Yeager (Attack on Titan) 5,019 fics

(F/M) Aang/Katara (Avatar Last Airbender) 4,999 fics

(F/M) Cassian Andor/Jyn Erso (Rogue One/Star Wars) 4,988 fics

(F/M) Lydia Martin/Stiles Stilinski (Teen Wolf TV) 4,970 fics

(F/M) Alistair/Female Warden (Dragon Age) 4,956 fics

(F/M) Natsu Dragneel/Lucy Heartfilia (Fairy Tail) 4,922 fics

(F/M) Jonathan Byers/Nancy Wheeler (Stranger Things TV) 4,903 fics

(F/M) Caroline Forbes/Klaus Mikaelson (Vampire Diaries TV) 4,899 fics

(F/M) Joyce Byers/Jim "Chief" Hopper (Stranger Things TV) 4,753 fics

(F/M) Higurashi Kagome/Inuyasha (Inuyasha) 4,711 fics

(F/M) Clark Kent/Lois Lane (Superman/DCU) 4,653 fics

(F/M) Remus Lupin/Nymphadora Tonks (Marauders/Harry Potter) 4,590 fics

(F/M) Todoroki Shouto/Yaoyorozu Momo (MHA) 4,480 fics

(F/M) Cullen Rutherford/Female Trevelyan (Dragon Age) 4,479 fics

(F/M) Anthony Bridgerton/Kate Sheffield | Kate Sharma (Bridgerton TV) 4,465 fics

(F/M) Lydia Martin/Jackson Whitteman (Teen Wolf TV) 4,435 fics

(F/M) Sandor Clegane/Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones TV/Song of Ice and Fire) 4,429 fics

(F/M) Eileen Leahy/Sam Winchester (Supernatural TV) 4,411 fics

(F/M) Tartaglia | Childe/Ying | Lumine (Genshin Impact) 4,360 fics

(F/M) Jirou Kyouka/Kaminari Denki (MHA) 4,349 fics

(F/M) Clary Fray/Jace Wayland (Shadowhunters TV) 4,340 fics

(F/M) Josh Lyman/Donna Moss (West Wing TV) 4,333 fics

(F/M) Astarion/Original Female Character (Baldur's Gate) 4,307 fics

Next list Dec. 21, 2024

[kb1301]

The Blorbos Board

This is the Blorbos Board where I just list down all the blorbos I have! They're my favorite characters from any franchise or fandom. There will definitely be lots of them so I may not be able to list all of them. Anything in bold and red means they're my favorite of favorites.

#kb blorbos (general tag for all things blorbo)

Call of Duty

König

Ghost (Original and Reboot)

Horangi

Soap (Original and Reboot)

Roach

Gaz

Price

Alejandro

Rodolfo / Rudy

Keegan P Russ

Logan Walker

Nikto

Sebastian Krueger

Barrage (it’s literally a fucking skin for the default operators but wtaf)

Destiny 2

Lord Shaxx

Saint-14

Cayde-6

Osiris

Ikora Rey

Crow

Lord Felwinter

Failsafe

Andal Brask

Eido

Shiro-4

Misraaks / Mithrax

Baldur's Gate 3

Gale

Shadowheart

Karlach

Wyll

Lae'zel

Astarion

Halsin

Minthara

Jaheira

Minsc

Gortash

Default Durge

Rainbow Six Siege

Thermite (This is my attack main in the game)

Pulse (This is my defense main in the game)

Ace (He's just here being pretty)

Hibana

Mozzie

Flores

Jäger

Fuze

Kapkan

Glaz

Stardew Valley

Alex

Haley

Harvey

Shane

Penny

Mass Effect

Garrus Vakarian

Tali'Zorah

Liara T'Soni

Urdnot Wrex

Commander Shepard

EDI

Joker

Kasumi Goto

Kaidan Alenko

Legion

Mordin Solus

Miranda

Jack

Dragon Age

Alistair Theirin

Leliana

Morrigan

Zevran

Anders

Hawke (Garrett or Marian or Custom)

Fenris

Isabela

Merrill

Varric Tethras

Cassandra Pentaghast

Cullen Rutherford

Josephine Montilyet

Blackwall / Thom Rainier

Dimension 20

The Bad Kids

The Dream Team

The Taste Buds

The Gunner Channel / The Wurst Crew

Pack of Pixies

Oisin Hakinvar

Mary Ann Skuttle

Elder Scrolls

Sharp-as-Night

Razum-dar

Teldryn Sero

Serana

Zeritha-var

Inigo the Brave

Lucien Flavius

Fallout

Craig Boone

ED-E

Rex

Veronica Santangelo

Arcade Gannon

Rose of Sharon Cassidy

The Ghoul / Cooper Howard

Lucy MacLean

Norm MacLean

Maximus

Thaddeus

Darkest Dungeon

Crusader (Reynauld)

Highwayman (Dismas)

Vestal (Junia)

Plague Doctor (Paracelsus)

Bounty Hunter (Tardif)

Leper (Baldwin)

Flagellant (Damian)

Jujutsu Kaisen

Kusakabe Atsuya

Nanami Kento

Higuruma Hiromi

Takuma Ino

Kong Shiu

Itadori Yuuji

Okkotsu Yuuta

Zenin Maki

Others

Deadpool / Wade Wilson (Marvel)

Wolverine / Logan Hewlett (Marvel)

Captain (Risk of Rain 2)

Bandit (Risk of Rain 2) <- My main

Commando (Risk of Rain 2)

Ramattra (Overwatch)

Moira (Overwatch)

Gabriel (Ultrakill)

V1 (Ultrakill)

Minos Prime (Ultrakill)

[lilmissnatcat24]

omg thank you so much for the tag my gorgeous @milkywayes i ADORE getting tagged in stuff like this

When did you post your first ever fanfic?

i think it was like in 2014? something like that? i was in high school

First Character(s) you wrote?

i don't want to talk about it (self insert fanfiction with the guy who plays voldemort in a very potter musical)

Main Character(s) you’re currently writing?

femshep/garrus

Character(s) you haven’t written about before but plan to write about soon?

i'm dying to write a jack/miranda fic, and if i dip my toe into red dead i'll post arthur/charles, and if i write cyberpunk 2077 i'll write v/judy

Fandom(s) you’re currently writing?

mass effect, planning on red dead 2, cyberpunk 2077, and sword catcher (because that book is changing my life)

Platonic pairing(s) you’re currently writing?

shepard/liara and garrus/wrex. both beautiful dynamics (my hottest take is that i just really don't care for liara's romance, i much prefer her as your bff)

Romantic pairing(s) you’re currently writing?

lil bit of shakarian, lil bit of shrios

Your top AO3 tags?

one bed, fluff and smut, whump, dom garrus vakarian

Current platform you use for posting?

used to be wattpad, but i'm on the ao3 grind now because i reect myself

Snippet of the WIP you are currently working on?

this is going in this week's chapter, i can't tell you how pumped i am for this

She’d never officially learned how to warp something. She’d tried, obviously, back in the Alliance. She’d drill all day until she would collapse on the ground, had to be spoon fed electrolyte water mixed with protein powder until she at least got the energy to vomit the sludge up. There was just something that never clicked, she could never figure it out. 

Until now. She knew exactly what was missing. 

Fucking vengeance. 

She channeled her biotic field in the dead center of the krogan’s chest. She imagined ripping his gullet open and filling it with acid. He stopped in his tracks, as if he were put in a stasis. But blood started to pool from his chest. She felt a tug pulling at her jaw, threatening to throw her forward. But she kept going, kept finding every little nerve and blood capsule in the krogan’s body and dismantling it. He fell to his knees and she rose to her feet. Her ears were roaring, her chest was tightening and tightening, but she didn’t dare stop because if she stopped then Garrus would be in danger-- 

“Shepard!” She vaguely heard Garrus call her name, but he was entirely in another plane of existence. The krogan was still moving, his eyelids still fluttered, his limbs still convulsed. It wasn’t enough, it was never enough. She extended out her other arm, she imagined her biotic forces forming into a javelin that would strike his chest and tear him apart, tear him in half, tear him like she tied his limbs to threshers and made them pull him until he was nothing more than blood and guts-- 

“Shepard!” Garrus took her shoulders in his hands. She dropped the krogan instantly, meeting his eyes. And for the first time, when Garrus looked at her, she saw fear. Genuine fear. Shepard took a gulping, quivering breath. Her head pounded like the worst hangover she’d ever experienced in her life, her teeth chattered. “He’s dead, okay! You can stop now, he’s dead.” 

She dared to look down at the krogan. He looked as though his entire body had been leached from blood, pooling around him as if his body were suddenly poisonous. Shepard did that. Shepard did that. She wanted to throw up, she wanted to laugh, she wanted to curl up and cry under her sheets. 

“Fuck,” she whispered to herself, her voice sounding unfamiliar to her own ears. 

“Since when have you been able to warp something like that?” Garrus asked incredulously, a hint of awe in his voice. 

“I-- I’ve never…” She felt as though someone had replaced her brain with sand, and it was pouring out of her eyes and her ears and her nose. Bile rose in her throat, she forced herself to swallow it down. 

“Crap, Del, why did you choose now to test it out?” 

Shepard looked at Garrus. The fear, the trepidation hadn’t entirely left his expression. What could she say? Garrus was in danger, that krogan was going to kill him? She wouldn't let anything bad happen to him, not after all of this time. So what if she molecularly decimated a lumbering alien at point-blank range? Garrus was okay, he was alive, he was breathing-- 

“I just…” she gave a little shake of her head. “I just did.” 

Garrus swallowed, not breaking eye contact with Shepard. He took a step towards her and cupped her face in his hands. His hands were so big, his palms rested entirely on her cheeks, his thumbs on her jaw. She could feel his subvocals from his touch, she was desperate to know what they meant. For a wild moment, Shepard thought he was about to kiss her. Surrounded by a pile of dead bodies, Fist waiting for them in his backrooms, and Garrus Vakarian was about to kiss her--

But he just traced a finger gingerly underneath both of her eyes. “Your eyes are bleeding…” he whispered, almost so quietly she couldn’t hear it. She squeezed them, feeling the blood inch down her cheeks. They didn’t feel any different than tears.

for the tag don't at all feel pressured to do it but here ya go @carnivorousbelvedere @otemporanerys @westernlarch

[quietwings-fics]

Characters Masterpost

OCs

11089/Even, Fen, Marie

Crimson Peak

alan mcmichael, edith cushing, lucille sharpe, thomas sharpe

Doctor Who

amy pond, bill potts, clara oswald, donna noble, jack harkness, lucy saxon, martha jones, rory williams, rose tyler, the doctor (eleven, nine, ten, twelve), the doctor's TARDIS, the master (missy, simm), wilfred mott

Five Nights at Freddy's

glamrock freddy, gregory, vanessa

Guardians of Ga'Hoole

kludd, nyra, soren

Legend of Zelda

ganondorf, link, zelda

Lilo & Stitch

cobra bubbles, grand councilwoman, jumba jookiba, lilo pelekai, nani pelekai, stitch disney, wendy pleakley

The Magnus Archives

jon sims, martin blackwood, oliver banks

Marvel

drax, gamora, groot

Mass Effect

commander shepard (femshep), garrus vakarian, tali'zorah nar rayya

MCYT

grian, goodtimeswithscar

Mulan

fa mulan, fa zhou, li shang

My Little Pony

applejack, pinkie pie, rainbow dash, twilight sparkle

Sarah Jane Adventures

luke smith, sarah jane smith

Supernatural

Torchwood

gwen cooper, ianto jones, jack harkness, owen harper, toshiko sato

Undertale

frisk, papyrus, sans, toriel

[immobiliter]

       Humans were so... complicated. It was something he'd observed at a distance while working for C-Sec on the Citadel, and something he'd become far more familiar with while on the Normandy. Where Turians — assuming they had been born and raised on Palaven or a primarily Turian colony out in the galaxy — could normally be predicted to act a certain way. To put the needs of the group above the needs of the self, to follow orders even if they inwardly disagreed, to value obedience over defiance. It was how they were all expected to act, anyway. How he had been expected to act. Meanwhile humans were far more varied as a species, and it was that variance that had perhaps prepared him well for a place like Omega.

       Of course she wasn't gonna give up her intelligence. She was seemingly on her own, on board a station where your isolation tended to make you a target. She was in the enemy camp, and the rest of his team could return from their own operation at any moment, leaving her outnumbered. Garrus wanted to say that this almost smelled like some final, desperate gambit.

       He'd be going with her alone, and therefore not putting the rest of the team in danger for something he didn't know an awful lot about. And the potential rewards of putting a number of these mercs in the ground, making Omega safer? Garrus couldn't let her just walk out of the door after making that kind of offer.

       But her cocksure attitude was sure to get on his nerves the longer he spent around it. His eyes glanced back down at the chocolate as she held her hand out again, and this time Garrus paid closer attention to his visor. But it said the same thing as it did the last time: non-toxic, safe for Turian physiology.

       Garrus still didn't take it from her, shifting his weight instead from one foot to the other.

       The urge to introduce himself rose and then swiftly fell again. She knew he was Archangel. She didn't need to know that he was Garrus Vakarian — as that would lead them to Shepard, and that was on a strictly need-to-know basis. “ Well, you already know who I am. But fine. What is it you humans say? About curiosity and the cat? ” Garrus had never been one to pass up an opportunity, even if wasn't the lawful or proper way to proceed. But there was no law now. No father here to chastise him for cutting corners. No Shepard here to emphasise that rules and regulations existed for a good reason. “ But before we leave I need assurances that wherever or whatever we infiltrate won't involve any civilians. You don't need to give me your intel or plans. Just assure me that we won't be going into civilian areas of the station. ”

   “Got this one in the bag, see? No problem-o.”

Johnny spares V. a single glance; and how she hated the fact that she could see the crook of his eyebrow despite the large dark sunglasses that he still wore. She guessed a vivid allucination didn’t much have need for inside or outside and the brightness that came from it. It still felt wrong though. Johnny snorts, throwing the smoke out through his lips, it desintregrated into the air as if reality itself was tearing itself appart. Almost as much as her mind  “Looks more like you’ve short-circuit the guy.”

That wasn’t what V. was thinking about. In that moment as she watched that stupid man smoking his stupid cigarette she just thought how much she wanted to have one herself.

V. blinks at his question, plesantly surprised that Archangel had at least taken a lighter tone. And lowered his gun. That helped too.

   “Can’t give you all my secrets in a silver platter like that!” a very quick and easy grin forms on her lips. Chin rests against her elbow with narrowing eyes. ‘You need to have at least seventy five approval with me to unlock my tragic background’ pops in her mind and it’d have been funny if it wasn’t fucking true. Not that she really thought of her background as tragic. 

More like cosmic karma.

Still, the merc remained where she was. In a gesture of clear relief, her chest fills in with air. Posture immediately loosening. No sudden movements. And yet her smile was still open and cheeky as was the wink “We just met! If I were to spill all the beans, there’d be no mysteries left to find out about me!“

Plus, talking about her… uh condition to just about anyone off in Omega sounded like a great way of getting everyone to try to swindle her out of her money. Tryin’ to claim they had a cure or some bulshit that would just end up with her frozen in a tub without her organs. She knew enough of what sort of contracts went on in NC, with things like Vorcha she was sure that shit went on there as well. She had a thought: A thought that she wouldn’t be surprised if Vorcha didn’t grab human organs to eat instead of selling them in the black market but she was sure there were some fucked up people in NC that would have done the same.

Not that the Vorcha needed her benefit of the doubt, everyone there (including herself and Archangel) were as likely to throw each other down the nearest shithole if that meant that they kept themselves alive… So… 

With a flicker of her wrist the comms open up in a dull blue that brightens the colour of her own hair from the dark blue to a more electric glare. The lenses she was wearing reflected it too, though those were far more electric and unnatural in that light. But when in Omega, what the fuck even meant to be “unnatural”? Everything that he had just mentioned was sent to his terminal with a few taps and a snap of her fingers.

   “Sure do.“

Everything, of course, except the proof of the information or what that was. He’d just have to trust her on that front. Plus, it was really not his business, but this is what she got for going directly to get a group of mercenaries without running it by a fixer. Since she didn’t really trust anyone in Omega, involving even more people, especially people like fixers, was just not gonna happen.

Right hand, still holding the bonbon, extends in his direction “Name’s V., by the way.“

[bluerose5]

I always like to imagine the point when Garrus gets comfortable enough around Shepard to eat with them because I'm one of those people who headcanons that turians can just tip their heads back and swallow their food whole. Don't know if that's biologically and anatomically accurate, but it's my headcanon regardless. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

So while Garrus is in full force like:

Shepard is thinking, "What the fuck am I watching right now?" 👁👄👁

[tarysande]

On Grief. And On Friendship. On Memory. And Love.

When my grandmother died, we didn't have a traditional funeral. We didn't wear black. We didn't sit around, solemn and silent. We told stories. We ate food she would have liked and drank Bailey's with cream. We got to do it together, of course, and we got to cry and hug and mourn and laugh and sing.

I'm sure all of us have heard some version of the phrase "online friendships aren't REAL friendships." I know I have. I've never understood it, either. For me, in all my neurodiverse glory, online friendships are often MORE REAL. Where else can you meet people and immediately jump into all the things you have in common? All the shared loves and hates and hyperfixations? Where else can you just bypass small-talk and, as Anne of Green Gables would say, find bosom friends so quickly? I've met so many online.

I honestly don't remember when I met Sara/@dearophelia. When I look through my tags, I know it's been at least seven years. I'm certain it's been longer because she definitely had username changes. And I am total shit at remembering username changes. More than once, I've told myself I should keep a spreadsheet. I'm pretty sure I've known her almost as long as I've been on tumblr, and that's more than a decade.

When Sara got sick, I finally used that tumblr function that notifies you whenever a blog updates. I wasn't around tumblr as regularly, but I didn't want to miss anything Sara might say. I hoped that one day I'd get the notification that everything was clear, she was in remission.

I didn't. Today, I got what will be the final notification from her blog--@vhenadahls sharing the information that Sara passed away. That there wouldn't be anymore updates. No more reblogs. No more snarky comments in the tags or gushing comments in the tags.

If this were a room and everyone who loved Sara, who enjoyed her fanfic (with or without knowing the woman behind it!), who has listened to her playlists, who played ME3 multiplayer with her, who was in any way touched by her in a way that brought their lives joy, it would be so full. We would all have stories to share. We'd all have memories to relive.

This room would be decorated with labradorite and pink and fat birbs and cats. There would be so much music--Taylor Swift and Halsey and Florence and the Machine and Hozier and so many many others. There would be a million fabulous selfies on the walls of Sara's huge smile and her vulnerability and her bravery. There would be gaming knickknacks and D&D dice and tarot decks and crystals and magic and books on every surface. All her faves would be represented. And it would still only brush the surface of how vibrant she was and how deeply and enthusiastically she loved what she loved.

If this were a room where we could also add all the characters she created, whose stories so many of us loved ... well, it would have to be awfully big. Sara wrote a lot of stories for a lot of fandoms.

And if this were a room where we and her characters were gathered, but we opened the doors for all the characters and stories that Sara helped inspire, helped grow, encouraged and enabled, well, I know a whole lot of my characters and stories would be here, too. I'm sure I decided to create Rose Trevelyan because of some conversation Sara and I had where I was imagining Rose Vakarian-Shepard grown up.

Sara, I'm really sorry I didn't get to finish the Vakarian-Shepard stories before you left. Most writers write for themselves, sure, but often they also write for specific readers. Sara was always one of mine, but I don't think she knew it. I lived for her gushing tag-comments. I loved when she was always so quick to jump in with prompts.

I'm honored that I was someone with whom Sara shared her original fic work. (She also once shared an absolutely horrifying scene with Garrus and Shepard's clones that she cut from Nora's story because it was just TOO AWFUL. In fact, she shared it with me BECAUSE IT WAS SO AWFUL and she knew I'd appreciate it.) In my heart of hearts, I wanted Sara to finish that original story and publish it. I wanted us to be part of each other's group of writer-friends (you know, you always see them thanking each other in their books). Hell, I wanted to have a small press at some point just SO I could publish Sara's stories. I believed in her THAT MUCH.

I love Sara's stories. I love her playlists. I love her blog, with its hodgepodge of interests and loves. I love her imagination and creativity and attention to detail. I love that I can still visit that mind by reading the bounty of work she left behind.

I mean, she made me wholeheartedly buy into a relationship between Shepard's mom and ZAEED.

Sara was one of the constants in my online life over the last decade. Even if we hadn't chatted for a while, I always knew we could pick up again like no time had passed (thanks, ADHD). As I write this, there's a little chat circle on the bottom right of my tumblr screen with her avatar in it and I can't bear the thought of hitting that X button and never seeing it pop up again.

Sara struggled and loved and fought and overcame and breathed and was brave. Not just in the past few years, when she was sick. As long as I knew her. And she didn't let anything stop her. She snarled in the face of it all and wrote stories so beautiful they broke my heart and then pieced it back together again in the same paragraph.

I miss her. I will always miss her. But I'm so happy I got to know her as long as I did. She'll live on in my memories, in my stories, in the characters she helped inspire. She'll live on every time I look at my favorite tarot deck--she was the first person I yelled at when I bought it--and when I see fat birbs and cute-maybe-evil cats. And if that's not REAL friendship, real love, I don't know what is.

[hq92]

This cover of Kiss From a Rose gives me very strong Shakarian feels Lord knows I'll be drowning in them forever and I had to share.

Anyone have any good song or playlist recommendations?

[continuous-spec]

The Forces that Bind Us Ch. 1

Summary: Detective Garrus Vakarian and a known affiliate of the Reds, Olivia Shepard, find themselves entwined in a murder mystery on the Zakera ward.

Here’s a snippet from the first chapter :)

Garrus slammed the first datapad in front of her. The metal echoing filled the room, bringing her attention back to the datapad—a photo of Aptis, light green colony markings covering his pale plates. Speca, a bright yellow fledgling, coiled up in his cowl. His mandibles flashed out in a grin, face still intact.

“Her father is now dead. Pity he has no known family connections that we can find. She may end up as a duct rat—“

“Fuck off!”

A rush of air passed Garrus’ face as the datapad whorled into the two-way mirror. It cracked the glass with ease. The oxygen sucked away from his breath as ozone perforated the room.

Purple and blue lights glitched and moved around Shepard’s form. Her eyes went to milky white. She remained seated, hands still tightly gripping the table.

Garrus was out of his seat, pistol drawn and trained between her eyes. The easiest way to take a human down. Kinetic ammo to bypass her barriers, hopefully.

The pounding in his chest rose into his throat. He gritted his fangs together, holding his breath, waiting for one wrong movement.

“Shepard, calm down. I could place you under arrest for threatening an officer, or we can have a nice chat. What do you want?” He kept his voice low, but his dual tones noted his nervousness hopefully, she did not pick that up. Most humans didn’t.

In his peripheral, Ridgefield and D’layne stormed the room, pistols out, and readied on her.

Her green eyes came into focus, darting from his pistol to the ones behind him. She sighed as the lights died around her, sputtering and hitching with its last gasp. Her white teeth flashed out—definitely a grimace.

“At ease, I’ve got this,” Garrus said without laying his eyes off her, pistol still drawn.

“Sir?” Ridgefield's voice wavered as he questioned. Garrus gave him a quick nod for the door as he lowered his weapon. Shepard was panicking and about to break. Garrus almost had her. He didn’t need his team doubting him in front of her.

As the door closed behind him, Garrus took his seat, intently watching Shepard’s movement.

“I didn’t kill anyone, only when the Alliance ordered me to. I’m a free agent, a student trying to get by.” Droplets of water edged at her eyes. She puffed out her chest while wiping her face dry. Liquor still wafted from her breath. Garrus was ready to turn the screws on her.

Read the rest on Ao3

[heroofshield]

That Loving Feeling: Day 2- Unrequited Love

Takes place during ME2, enjoy!

still not edited, sorry.

--

In the few years that Garrus Vakarian had known Rose Shepard, he’d come to view humans differently.

Sure he’d learned about humans and the First Contact War while growing up on Palaven, but it wasn’t until he quit C-Sec and joined the Normandy did he really learn about humans. How they might seem to have relatively short lives compared to the rest of the Council species, but that didn’t mean they didn’t accomplish anything.

Shepard and the Normandy crew had shown him that humans could fight just as hard and with as much stubbornness one moment, and then the next become so intoxicated they tape a knife to small robots in an attempt to make them fight.

He’d also learned that they had the capacity for so much compassion and wanting to help as much as they could; when the Normandy was attacked he watched as Shepard went back for Joker, regardless of her own safety.

Even though it claimed her life.

“Two years later and it’s like nothing has changed.” Garrus thought as he watched Rose finish reassembling her sniper rifle and took a breath.

Getting to know Shepard better after setting up on the new Normandy, even being a near constant on away missions he’d started to get a heavy feeling in his chest whenever Rose was around. His world seemed to narrow to only her when she entered the forward batteries, how they bantered back and forth, and how when the nightmares of being spaced seemed to be too much she knew that he’d be around to help calm her down.

“I don’t have a thing for humans...just Shepard.” Garrus told himself while forcing his legs towards the workbench where Rose was just standing from. “It’s always been just her.”

“Hey Vakarian, finally going to let me properly spec your Widow?” Rose cracked with a smile, knowing that Garrus was fiercely protective of his sniper.

He’d been a lifeline after discovering she’d been dead for two years, the one familiar thing around her other than Joker on this strange ship.

“You wish.” Garrus paused short of Shepard, suddenly feeling nervous about what he was about to ask. Mimicking a motion he’d seen other humans do, he ran a hand over the top of his crest before resting it on the top. “I...”

Rose slightly tilted her head in confusion, suddenly noticing how nervous Garrus was. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah...You know how we talk about flexibility and reach...I was wondering if you’d like to test that out sometime.”

It took a minute for Rose to fully understand what Garrus meant and felt her cheeks heat up. “Garrus...listen-I would but, Kaidan’s the only one for me.”

Garrus didn’t know if he should be relieved or upset at the rejection. “Even after what he said on the colony?”

“He sent an email afterwards, explaining why. It was the surprise of seeing me after two years of thinking I was dead. I mean, he’s still a jerk for saying all those things, I can’t seem to get over him.” Rose felt horrible, that she could see how much Garrus really liked her but she just didn’t feel the same way.

He would always be just a friend.

“I know this is going to be awkward but you’re a good friend, Vakarian. Always will be.”

The sting of Rose turning him down somewhat fading, Garrus knew that he needed space to nurse his emotional wounds and get some dextro-alcohol to help start the healing process. “Then we can be friends.”