#roommate taking absolutely no precaution got covid around then.
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every time im struggling with something related to my most recently developed food and health issues, i just always end up sitting there thinking about how its far more likely than not that its the direct and attributable fault of multiple different people. and like. theres nothing i can do about it and it doesnt help anything. but i sure do fucking think about it.
#txts#roommate taking absolutely no precaution got covid around then.#i couldve gotten it from them and just been asymptomatic while it destroyed my internal organs.#and like two weeks after that i went through a months long massive trauma in my personal life too.#that was the direct fault of three/four people who decided to just make things as miserable and painful for me as possible.#whatever happened to me started like. within a week after all of this.#could 100% have been covid. could 100% have been emotional/mental trauma causing physical stress. (thats an established issue)#could have been both tbh!!!#but what does it matter!!!!!!!!!!! everyone else gets to move on and be happy!#and i get to be in lasting physical pain every other time i eat and add 3-5 new medicines/supplements to my daily routines! :)
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I was supposed to go to a concert with my family on Wednesday. I got my updated COVID vax with enough time for peak protection to kick in around the show date, bought some heavy duty masks and xylitol spray… took all the necessary precautions.
My roommate tested positive this morning. Whole trip canceled for me, even though I’m negative.
They’re still going. I’m staying home. Both my parents have been exposed and are immune, but we can’t risk my sister catching it since she just started a new job.
To say I’m extremely upset about it might be an understatement at this point; I’ve been putting off vacations and trips and time off all year because we’ve been slammed with fieldwork and my coworkers have all taken time, which required me to stick around and fill in for them. And that’s what it’s gonna be like for the rest of the year, too. This was my one chance to get out of town purely to have a little relaxation time, and it’s gone.
I’m trying very hard to remind myself that it’s an act of love on my part, not wanting to risk their health, even though it’s tearing me up inside.
And I’m angry with my roommate even though it’s not really her fault. So I’m keeping away from her and not talking to her so I don’t lash out. I’m allowed to be upset and angry about this, and especially so if I don’t take it out on her.
If she tries to force me to talk about it and reassure her and soothe her guilty conscience, though? All bets are off and I’m going to ABSOLUTELY REAM her ass. All bets are OFF. She doesn’t get to be the cause of this and then make my misfortune all about her, and I just KNOW she’s gonna fucking try.
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What On Earth Has Happened
Hey, no story here, no experiments. Just a play by play of an awful year in my life. Please don't reblog. Trying to just get it down in one place for people who care about me. Long, sob-story beneath the cut.
Air - 'Things are looking up!' I had started to drift a bit from tumblr. The porno purge came and a lot of my friends trickled off the platform after that. I went back to school, attempting to score myself a Masters degree in something that would pay enough to get me out of Student Debt. I was doing great, picking things up fast. I got a new job at a company doing pretty menial work, but the people I worked with were great conversationalists. The work didn't involve dealing with customers at all, paid well, and was small and accomplishable tasks. Essentially I was being prepped to take a better position at the place once I had my Masters. Covid happened, then. Earth - 'The Whole World Sucks Right Now' My company was "essential," so I continued going to work, now on weird schedules. The company I worked for was profiting off Covid, all the while making fun of it as an overblown conspiracy, even as their own epidemiologist urged them to take better precautions. Work became hard to swallow. Water - 'When your lowest place could be lower' The apartment I shared with my boyfriend flooded. The lowest place in any sewage system is typically the bathtub, such that if it backs up, it does so into that tub. Our lowest point is the toilet. So the apartment flooded. Three times. Roots growing through the sewage outflow meant that, often, you needed to wait a solid hour between toilet flushes, or else the toilet would back up with such gusto the sewage would slosh down the hallway and into the living room. We mopped many times. The problem was finally fixed 8 months later, necessitating our having to camp because our house had no water. Fire - 'To destroy all you've done' One afternoon, I smelled burning. Going to our bedroom, I found our shelf a column of flame. I could barely breathe for all the smoke, but I managed to grab a blanket and beat the fire out. On the other side of the room, the pages of the books upon another shelf had begun to crisp from the heat, the blinds on all the windows were warped. The whole apartment had been about to go up. I'm kinda scared of fire now. Heart - 'When moving is too much to ask' Personal health sorta hit a new low. Migraines kept me out of work for two full weeks. I have seasonal foot pain, I always assumed from hiking for a living in my 20s. Turns out it was gout, all the while. Gout is exceptionally painful: it's like a messy pile of razor blades in the ball of your foot every time you step down. At work, I could barely stand. Walking from my car to the door became something I needed to psyche myself up for. Not a lot can stop a gout flare-up once it's in full swing, so I just had to wait it out. For a month. Two. Some of the worst sustained pain I've been in. Little did I know that, in January, come the kidney stones. Kidney stones feel awful. Feel like total shit. Gout and kidney stones are comorbid--brought about as a result of the meds I take to help me focus. So any day I don't drink enough water is a day when my kidneys or my foot just starts aching. But going back to September of 2020... Homophobia - 'goddammit' Finally things are looking better. I'm limping quickly again. Then I am called into the HR office. I am told that two sexual harassment charges have been brought against me. I'm told that one individual has alleged that I, while in the restroom, used a reflective toilet brush to attempt to peep him under a stall wall. I did not do this. I do not understand--reflective toilet brush?? wtf. The second allegation: I just straight up looked over a stall at a guy. I didn't do this either. I'm asked to defend myself, I ask who or date or time of day. I am given nothing. I remark that I don't think I'm tall enough to see over the stall, and I do not understand about the toilet brush. Of the ten minutes of the meeting, I spend 8 of them trying to get my head around how a claim about a reflective toilet brush has me here. "Would you like us to go now to see if you're tall enough to see over the stall? If that would help your defense?" says the HR head. "Yes, I
would," says I. We did not go. I am told that the accusers have no reason to be collaborating, or to even know each other made a claim. This is bullshit, because it was a company of 80 people, and only a quarter of those employees used the restroom where my alleged harassment was to have taken place. Before I am dismissed from work for the day to go home and wait to find out if I'll be fired or not, I march into the HR office once more and say "I hope none of this is happening because I'm gay." The HR head looks positively offended. I got fired cuz I'm gay. Next day I got a call. They'd come to the "objective truth" (that phrase is burned in my mind), and were terminating me. Apparently they discounted the toilet brush rumor, after all. But they really honestly believed I looked over the stall at a dude. Nightmare - 'No Fear One Fear' Let me tell you something: this is a nightmare. This is my honest-to-god nightmare. I've been terrified of getting accused of something in a bathroom since I was 11 years old. I am incredibly self-conscious and careful in public restrooms. To be fired? From a place full of people I like? And all of them will think I'm a pervert. My boyfriend worked at the same place. He would now have to work there every day dealing with people looking at him and wondering what he must think of his boyfriend. That sent me on a spiral. I'm still out of work, almost a year later. It would have been the worst mental health crisis of my life if it wasn't for my boyfriend, my support network, and the meds I've finally been able to get ahold of. Oh, also. My two accusers? Were roommates. HR knew they were roommates. They basically collaborated on a story to get me fired. The story circulating around the place (I still have acquaintances I talk to working there) has dropped the reflective toilet brush entirely. I guess they thought it was too unbelievable. So anyway, the people who accused me are now telling a different set of events than what I was told. Absolute horse shit. Tried to go to my city's human right's council to see if my situation warranted further attention. I gave my side of the story--including tales of the straight manager who had had enough harassment charges brought against him that he was no longer allowed to meet female staff--which indicated I'd been treated differently and wrongly. My old job made an impassioned argument that the committee violated their First Amendment rights(?) ('Freedom of speech' is the biggie with the First Amendment, for people who cba re:USA). I won the vote!! But one member of the committee was missing. So there weren't enough people for the vote to pass. Dismissed. We took it to the EEOC to make an official federal complaint. Just a week ago, an agent of the US Government patiently explained to us that these laws are literally designed to fuck over the worker and protect the employer unless they are epically stupid, and unfortunately, mine had not been epically stupid. So there's nowhere to go, no recourse to be had. It's over, I guess. Family - 'How to sum it up quickly...' My family hit me with the old soft-disown. No more calls, no more communication. They think they are loving me by not having contact with me. By depriving me of my family, they hope it will make me realize that the path I'm on is destructive, and I'll return to them living an upright life. No. I'm living an upright life, now. And if my family can choose to throw me away, then they are not a family I choose. Then my dad hit me back two months later, absolutely gaslighting me and pretending we never had the disown conversation at all. Reality - 'I don't know who I am anymore' I have trouble knowing what's real, anymore. Every message my dad sends on the surface seems loving and supportive and plaintive. I feel I must be the one in the wrong. I got fired for bullshit reasons. It doesn't feel real. "My family can't possibly have ceased contact with me: that's one of those things I know can never happen!!" But that did happen. So what else that feels real, actually isn't? I do
mean to be so dramatic, and I won't apologize for it. But I truly do feel like my mind has been pretty thoroughly unseated by the last year. Whoever I am, I'm becoming someone different. More distilled, at very least. I've discovered a lot of things about myself: trauma that has likely led to a lot of my mental health problems. Discovered I actually have RAGING ADHD, and it has robber me of a lot of things I wanted to do, and now is sort of consuming me completely. I'm looking for help. Trying to get better. Here's hoping. Every bold point above could be its own book, for all my thoughts about them. But enough of that for now. Love you. Thanks for reading.
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Here's what it's like for a retail employee right now: So I want a covid booster, but I haven't been able to get one. From October through this week I've worked between 45 and 50 hours every week. No time for... anything. I've also had unreliable days off... I got so sick from the second dose that I 100% need to have at least one day off after the booster to recover. Haven't been able to get an appointment that works with that. I still haven't been able to find an appointment that works with that even looking through January.
But people who don't work in retail have had time for all that. And people who don't work in retail were swarming in my store without masks on, regardless of their vaccination status. I'm not allowed to tell people to put a mask on, and I'm not allowed to just... refuse to do my job. On Christmas eve there were 5-10 people shopping in every aisle, and I had to do my job around them for 10 hours.
So. Ok. Now I don't feel well. My store has at minimum 12 people out with covid at the moment, and a bunch of people have bronchitis too which is fun.
Thing is, I've literally gone to one social thing since October. And I had a mask on the entire time. I don't see anyone but my roommates, my coworkers, and you know... the swarms of customers. And yet it's the swarms of customers who are preventing me from being able to get a covid test. You see everyone everywhere decided they'd get to spend the holidays with their extended families and friends, and now they're all sick too, so there's no otc tests available, and absolutely no appointments for tests anywhere near me for at least the next four days. There's one walk in place near me, but I'm assuming their lines are going to be out the door. I'll probably try anyway if I don't feel better tomorrow, but who wants to wait in a two hour line when they don't feel well?
So everyone gets to fucking go party and do whatever they want, and me, the bottom of the barrel retail worker whose life clearly doesn't fucking matter can't even take basic precautions to keep myself and others safe.
I'm off the next two days, so maybe I just have a little bug and I'll feel better? But if I can't get a covid test they're not going to let me miss work just because I feel icky.
I hate everything about this. If you're running around without a mask on you can go fuck yourself.
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851
How have you been feeling lately? Have you been doing ok? Uncomfortable because of period cramps and the heat WHICH IS STILL HERE, even though it’s supposed to be gone right about now and it’s supposed to be raining at this point. I wish I was kidding saying this but we literally have three electric fans turned on just for the living and dining rooms. It’s crazy and stupid and it shouldn’t be this hot anymore. I’m doing better mentally and emotionally, so at least that balances things out lol.
Are you currently in quarantine? Still am. While all countries are slowly going back to normal, our Covid cases continue to get higher and higher everyday because our government hasn’t done anything except to make us stay home for three months. No mass testing, no alternate public transport plans, and for some reason Duterte keeps borrowing billions of dollars’ worth of loans from the World Bank nearly every week, and we have no idea where the stupid fucking money goes. Our government is convinced they’ve been doing everything right so they’ve loosened up quarantine protocols, so with malls and restaurants being open again we’ve done nothing but reach record high cases almost every day.
Do you wear a mask when you go to the store? I’ve gone outside a total of three times since March and I wore a mask for two of those times. The first time I went out I just genuinely forgot to bring a mask, but in the end it was fine because I only had to stay in the car.
Does your state require people to wear masks in stores? As far as I know it’s not a requirement per se, but fortunately everyone follows the safety precautions anyway.
Do you know anyone who’s had the coronavirus? Yeah, my mom’s former boss. This is a bit of a stretch but I also know someone personally who had immediate family members that tested positive.
What was the last sweet treat you ate? I had a peanut butter doughnut from J.CO! Soooooooo good.
Was it a nice day out today? No, it’s too hot. Even if life was normal rn I’d prefer to be indoors with air conditioning, like a mall.
Is the weather nice where you live usually? Fuck no. It is disgustingly hot, sticky, and humid 3/4 of the year.
What was the last thing you ordered online? I don’t do a lot of online shopping. When I get something online it’s usually to get food delivered, and the last time I did that it was me and Andrew getting Hong Kong noodles.
Are you expecting a package right now? Nopes.
Have you ever ordered anything from Wish? If so, what did you buy, and did you feel it was worth it? No, though I remember Good Mythical Morning featuring it in a couple of episodes. I don’t feel comfortable buying from stores or sellers that sell things for a lot cheaper because they could always be fake, so I wouldn’t feel comfortable buying from that site.
Are you a youtuber? If so, are you consistent with uploads? and how many subscribers do you have? I’m not, but I do have my own channel. I just use it to like videos and subscribe to my favorites, though.
What is one thing you hate about summer? The weather. Honest to goodness I’d really rather live somewhere that gave me -40C weather everyday.
Did you go outside today? No. My dad wanted to bring Cooper to my grandma’s place and I planned to come along, but at the last minute he changed his mind and did just the errands he was supposed to do.
What is the name of your youtube channel, if you have one? It’s just my full name because my YouTube is linked to my Google account.
What was the name of the last store or restaurant that overcharged you? I don’t know any instances where that would happen. I don’t find service charge inconvenient because I know that directly goes to the servers anyway so I don’t mind how high it gets most of the time. Is your room more often messy or clean? It’s clean most of the time but sometimes when I’m busy I won’t be able to keep it clean and it’ll be clean-messy? Like I’ll leave stuff around but I’ll still know where everything is lol.
Who is someone you miss? ALL MY FRIENDS BRUH
What is something you miss? Being able to go out and freely do activities. Life Pre-COVID < Life pre-COVID, perfectly put. I miss getting an allowance, being out until midnight, having dates with my girlfriend thhe most.
Do you feel like your emotions are often haywire? Not necessarily, but they can get pretty unstable sometimes.
Have you ever received a misdiagnosis from a doctor? Nah but I’ve been given a prescription that didn’t work. We went to our family doctor who made me take a certain medicine for three days, and I started getting worried when three days had passed and I still had my fever. I went to Angela’s mom and she was super quick to tell me that that medicine wasn’t the right one to take for a UTI and prescribed me with something else; and that second one ended up working like magic.
Have you ever been “diagnosed” with a mental illness from an online friend? who is not a doctor? If yes, isn’t that frustrating? That’s never happened before, but if it did I wouldn’t let my frustration get the best of me. I’d just tell them that they should avoid doing that if they’re not a professional because they could very much end up seriously harming people.
Do you have any friends that you can trust and tell everything to? All of them.
What was the name of your favorite roommate you’ve had? Kimi :)
Do you have a favorite book that you’ve read multiple times? Yeah when I was a kid I would reread this book that an aunt had given me for Christmas as much as I could. For many years I forgot the title but after painstakingly Googling the few keywords I could remember I finally found out it again – it’s a series called Three Girls in the City by Jeanne Betancourt, but I only ever read the first book because it was the only gift I got. It’s not my favorite book, but I’d be so happy if I got to be reunited with it again because I don’t think we got to keep it around when we moved houses.
What’s one book or book series that you’ve read multiple times? ^ That, multiple wrestling memoirs, and Norwegian Wood by Haruki Murakami. I’ve also reread the Twilight Saga once.
What was the name of the funniest kid you’ve ever babysat? I never babysat anyone other than younger relatives, but the one I enjoyed taking care of the most was my cousin Lucas. He was the smartest kid I babysat so it was fun talking to him, plus his yaya was always nice to me, they had a playground and sandbox at home, and all I had to do was keep him company while he watched Thomas and Friends over and over.
Do you enjoy babysitting? Just the younger relatives that were smarter and more behaved. I didn’t like the kids who thought kicking and being rowdy were fun.
Do you have any big regrets? One big one.
Are there things about your past that bother you? Of course. My entire childhood is one.
What was the last thing you saw or read on social media that made you angry? OMG get ready for this one. Our dumb as a rock presidential spokesperson was talking about how happy he is that the country beat UP’s (my school, which the government hates because we always talk shit about them lol) prediction of 40,000 Covid cases by the end of June if the government doesn’t do anything to prevent more cases. How many cases do we have? Fucking 36,000. Our government is happy because they finally beat our school over something for the very first time and they are technically happy that we got 36,000 cases, which if you round up will give you 40,000 anyway. My school had a fucking FIELD DAY over it and now he is a national meme.
Do you often post about controversial topics on facebook? At first I didn’t but that’s because I wasn’t active on Facebook in the past anyway. After I realized that I had a bigger friends list on Facebook I decided to put it to good use and post about controversial topics to educate others. It’s made a bunch of conservative family members uncomfortable and that’s the goal, son.
Do you think it’s a good idea to post about serious topics on social media? or do you think that it’s better to discuss serious topics in person? It definitely is. In person is good too but you don’t always get that opportunity, so sharing stuff through social media doesn’t hurt too as long as information is accurate. For instance most of my relatives life far from me, so if I want them to get a piece of my mind about Trump or BLM or abortion, sharing informative graphics and tables is always convenient.
What was your favorite book you had to read for school? Without Seeing the Dawn by Stevan Javellana is my absolute favorite. It’s probably the closest thing to being my favorite book. Number the Stars by Lois Lowry is a good runner-up. On the other hand, Dekada ‘70 by Lualhati Bautista is my favorite that was written in Filipino.
Have you ever failed a class and had to repeat it? Nope. I really believe I was meant to fail algebra in my freshman year in high school because I failed every exam, but I think my teacher just took pity on me and gave me a barely-passing mark at the end of the year so that I didn’t have to go to summer school. As for college, I’ve never failed a class.
What class in school did you hate the most? In college I hated my economics elective. I still don’t know why that’s mandatory for us journ students... I also dreaded a couple of journalism classes, but it was more because of the teachers than the classes’ topics.
Have you ever wanted to be a teacher? I don’t think so.
What’s one childhood dream that has stuck with you, and one that has not? Having a big house; becoming a firefighter.
Would you want to re-live your childhood over again if you could? I’ve already said it on this survey, but: fuck no. I’m ok where I am now, even if I am a clumsy adult.
Which do you like more: being an adult or being a kid? Being an adult. Being a kid meant having to stomach the smell of hard alcohol and cigarettes from morning to evening everyday; being caught in the middle of screaming matches between drunk relatives; and being cramped in a single-floor home with 12 people. Like I said, I love where I am now. The amount of independence I gained in college was freeing and felt so nice and I’m glad my parents never tried holding me back. I’m also glad that I didn’t fall into the same alcohol trap, and that I know how to deal with my alcohol responsibly.
At what age were you when you started to feel like you were mature enough to offer others advice? Around college-age, so like when I turned 18.
Did your parents smoke or drink when you were growing up? Neither of them did, because we had enough alcoholism happening at my old home. It was actually my drunken relatives that finally drove my mom out of that house.
Do you enjoy bonfires? I’ve only been to one and I was like 9 years old then, so I wouldn’t know how I feel about them now.
Have you ever stepped on a sparkler? Nope.
What, do you know of, are you allergic to? No allergies.
Have you ever ridden in an ambulance? Also nopes. I always feel bad for the ambulances that I see because I live in a very traffic-heavy city and they always end up getting stuck and crawling through traffic like the rest of us. We do try to swerve, but our roads are so tiny and always cramped that there’s little space left for us to move out of the ambulance’s way, so even though we’re able to make a path for it, the space is not big enough for the ambulance to drive in the speed it’s supposed to.
What is your favorite version of the Bible to read, if applicable? That’s a big no thanks from me.
Do you follow trends? or are you a trendsetter? Yeah, I follow some of them if I think they are nice.
Has anyone ever described you as a trendsetter? Nope, because I am not.
Do you know anyone who used to be loving, but then turned cold? List three people you’ve known whom this has happened to. My mom, Athenna, Macy. The only person I don’t resent out of these three is Macy, because I know she turned distant due to mental health issues and because she wants to fix herself first, which is responsible.
What SAT subjects, if any, did you get a perfect score in? We don’t have SAT.
What were your best subjects in school? and what was your favorite subject in school? I loved taking history electives in college, and I performed the best in them too. I also did well in international relations, which was under the political science department.
Have you ever been abused by a parent or legal guardian? I’ve been verbally and emotionally abused by my mom ever since I can remember.
Do you have a lot of wounds from your past? If we’re getting visual then I’d rather say that I have one ugly, infected gash that gets bothersome from time to time. My past isn’t made up of little tiny scattered wounds.
Has anyone ever called you a jerk? Behind my back, probably.
Are you a jerk? I can be, so I don’t mind being called it. I never said I was the nicest person.
What color were your bedroom walls in high school? They have always been white. My mom doesn’t let us have control over our own rooms, so in the beginning it’s always been plain boring white. Don’t get me wrong, I like my room but sometimes it just feels like living in a cell.
Is there a girl or guy you wish you hadn’t let slip away? I wish I was still close with my high school friends, and I remember saying how they were for keeps in my old surveys so that makes me extra sad haha. I’m civil with most of them, but no longer close. And I only ever talk to them if it’s their birthdays or if they achieved something big. The only people I’ve remained close with from that original group are Angela and Hans.
Is there an old friend that you miss and would like to reconnect with? Not really. Sofie and I have grown apart from each other now and we’re both very happy, so there’s no need to change that. I’m okay with seeing her once or twice a year.
Who has hurt you the most? My mom.
Have you been bullied? Yeah in kindergarten. Long-lasting effects though.
Which talent show, if any, would you most like to audition for? and have you auditioned for one? No thanks. I don’t have the kind of talent that I can show off, like singing or playing an instrument.
Do you know anyone who’s auditioned for American Idol? I don’t think so. But my mom knows someone who auditioned for our local version of America’s Got Talent. He’s a ventriloquist that my mom used to get for our parties. As far as I know he got into the grand finals, but I’m not sure if he won.
Is there someone you think should audition that hasn’t yet? American Idol’s been over for a while now.
What time of day do you usually feel your best? I love the evenings.
What’s one way in which you’ve changed within the last ten years? I was in sixth grade then, I’ve graduated from college now. My mom was purely verbally abusive to me then, now we have brief stints of having an actually healthy relationship. I had one dog then and I have two dogs now; I had no friends then and I have tons of them now. There’s been a lot of tiny changes but nothing that were life-changing.
Do you feel like time goes by fast, or slow? It goes both ways depending on how stimulated I am or how much fun I’m having.
Who do you know who has died of cancer? One of my great-aunts.
Has there been cancer in your family? Yeah, ^ that. Other than her I’m not sure if we’ve had other cases. My family tends to be hush-hush about cancer and only ever call it ‘c’ or ‘the big one.’
Have you ever stayed overnight in a hospital, and if so, what for? Yes, once for a low platelet count.
Have you ever been a victim of police misconduct? No but the cops here are just as corrupt as the ones in the US, so I can very much be a victim any time. It’s just a matter of being in the wrong place at the right time.
Have you ever been so angry you wanted to sue someone? Not so much that I wanted to sue someone, no.
Have you ever been a victim of racism? My country isn’t diverse at all and we’re all Filipinos here, and I’ve only ever traveled to Asian countries, so no. But racism is a big reason why I have no plans to go to other countries known for it.
Have you ever deleted a friend on Facebook for making racist comments? I’ve unfriended those who were being little bitches about BLM and George Floyd’s death, so I guess that kinda counts as being racist. I still have a few racist Facebook friends that I keep around, but that’s because they’re family members.
What was the last thing you ate? Binagoongan.
What was the theme of your senior prom? Clair de Lune, so like the moon and shit.
Did you go to prom? It was mandatory, so I had to go even though I really had no interest.
Have ever been engaged or married? I have been neither.
Are you an aunt or uncle? Nah but I’m a godmother to one of my cousins.
Do you live to glorify God and to do His will? LOL no
Are you happy with the way you are living your life day-to-day right now? It could be better and more filled with activity. But I’m not miserably depressed right now and that’s more than enough for me.
Do you feel like your life was better or worse six years ago? It was slightly better. I feel like 2014 was my best year.
Have you ever made a huge, catastrophic mistake? Not anything that ruined my life or someone else’s, no.
Do you feel like you are currently in a state of suffering? and that not all of your basic needs are being met? If so, how long have you been in a state of suffering? Basic needs?? So you mean poverty? No.
Do you hate social injustice? Absolutely. Anyone who tolerates it is automatically a gigantic prick, I’d say.
Are you happy with the current social class you are in? No. I don’t know how it translates to English, but in Filipino we have this term called naghaharing-uri that comprises the very very very very tiny top of the social pyramid and it’s made up of top government officials and their families, heads of corporations, old money families, etc. It’s no secret that it’s this 1% that exploits the 99% remaining in the pyramid, so even though I’m relatively comfortable in my class, I hate that, when it comes down to it, we’re only being used by this 1% for their own benefit.
Life isn’t fair. True or false? True.
Do you hate that life is so unfair? Sometimes, if it’s for stuff about social injustice and how some people have to be homeless, why homophobia exists, etc. But if it’s for tiny problems, I feel like they’re necessary sometimes so we can learn from them.
Name a few people who seem to have everything handed to them. Some richer kids that I know.
Who do you go to when you’re upset? Sometimes myself, sometimes Gabie.
Do you pray less or more than you did 5 years ago? A LOT LESS, thank fuck I got out of that trap.
Do you pray a lot? Definitely not.
Do you frequently have back pain? Yeah, haha. Kinda expected considering I have scoliosis.
What’s the worst side effect you’ve experienced for a medication? and what’s the worst withdrawal effect you’ve experienced from a medicine? Nothing worse than diarrhea. I’ve never experienced withdrawal.
Have you ever used an epi pen? Nopes.
What’s a name that you like but probably wouldn’t use for one of your kids? Isabella because I’m already an Isabelle and my girlfriend has a sister named Isabela.
What’s your name, and do you like it? Robyn. I like it now.
Would you prefer to give your kids common names or unique names? Common, more old-school names. I just feel like they sound super elegant.
Do you feel like anybody values you in the way that you deserve? Angela, Andrew, and Gab.
Who have you felt the most valued by? ^ Them.
Have you ever been treated like you were inferior? For sure.
What was the name of the biggest bully in your high school? Oh my god this survey is so long... we didn’t have bullies in high school. We had mean girls and mean girl cliques, but as long as you weren’t involved in drama with them you’d be fine.
Do you ever sleep outside? Nah. I’d sleep at the rooftop but there are sooooo many mosquitoes at night.
How many siblings do you have? Two.
Are you the oldest, youngest, middle, or only child? Eldest.
How many kids do you want to have? One or two would be great.
Do you want to get married? Yessssssss.
Best date you’ve been on? Probably that time we went to BGC so we can feel fancy and have a fancy dinner, then when we meant to walk back to our car to go home we ended up having impromptu drinks at like 11 PM when we randomly found a jazz bar loudly playing live music in the area. OH and that time we went museum hopping in Manila and we ended the day having delicioussss Italian food.
Dream date? Traveling out of the country.
Ever kissed someone on New Year’s? Nah. We celebrate New Year’s with our respective families so there’s no chance of that happening. Which is fine, because New Year’s is traditionally a family-centric holiday here so it would be weird for anyone to ditch their families.
Have you ever had an experience so good you felt like you were flying? Sure.
Have you ever been in so much pain you prayed that you would die? YES, with my toothache last year.
What brings you the most joy? My dogs.
What is your passion; what is it that would bring you the most joy and fulfillment in life? I’m at a point where it still keeps changing, so I don’t wanna give an absolute answer to this just yet.
Have you ever laid your dreams aside because someone else wanted you to? That’s never happened to me. I only ever gave up on one dream because it realistically wasn’t attainable, when it came down to it.
Who supports you in everything you do? My two best friends.
Who always tries to stop you whenever you try to go after your dreams? I haven’t had anyone bar me, but if someone tried to they would definitely hear from me.
Do you believe in following your heart, in going after your dreams? Not always.
Do you wish other people would want you to be happy? Of course.
Do you wish you had someone who loved and supported you? I already do.
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@thelilengi
I don't live in the metro area that they do. I am right outside of it where a lot of places have been reopened since last summer when things got loosened up. The population density is lower. I've gotten my haircut probably twice. I went to a few restaurants lately too. But I wear a mask like I should. The restaurants are all practicing social distancing and good sanitation.
Only time I think I pushed it was visiting family. The rule was that you can only be around up to ten people from outside your household over the holidays. But it has to be the same ten people. My roommate visited so much of her family that I would have had only like 2 people I could visit because me and her are considered a household. I wasn't going to take one for the team and be home alone over the holidays while she gets to be out and about. I felt it was unfair. So I visited some family too.
Despite this nobody in my family has gotten covid from me, nor have I gotten it from them. And at work we're social distancing and half the office is working from home at any given time.
I'm pretty introverted so I already rarely go anywhere unless it's work or groceries. But I'm not scared of this thing. I was absolutely terrified when this started since I'm high risk too, but I became a little more brazen ever since I attended 4-5 protests over the summer and still somehow never got sick.
As long as precautions are taken, I think it's not out of the question to do some 'normal' things again. I'm young and my roommate is vaccinated. Most of my family is vaccinated now too. I feel really bad for those who are so terrified that they've stayed home and isolated themselves for this long without seeing their friends or family at all. I'm good at handling isolation but I think even I would go crazy.
This is very sad. I am in a zoom hangout with people I thought I had more in common with. But they are paralyzed in fear. It’s like March 2020 never ended for some people.
And I’m over here like. Just outside of the city. Many of the things they’ve talked about wanting so badly to do.. are things I’ve been doing since last summer but I am too chicken to say anything. I don’t think it would go over very well.
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