#rn i just know this info is something i will want to remind myself of later

[fucking-relax]

point of view: Spiral Time

adapted from Unmasking Autism by Devon Price

"...time [is] flowing and even folding back on itself, an overlapping series of cycles, periods of dormancy intersecting with growth."

Expand the time frame you use to gauge productivity and success -> don't be afraid to cycle back to old projects or let a passion go when it's not giving you what you want/need

Slow down. Stillness helps neurodivergent minds process the huge quantities of data we take in.

[neobora]

i want to change. i cried just rn. i'm just wasting my time w trying to manifest my desires. i don't know how to change this fucking situation because i dwelled on the fact i have the most terrible circumstances and because of that my subsconcious got used to it. I don't know how to get out of my comfort zone and victim mindset. I have been consuming information for years and do nothing but feel sorry for myself and thinking i'm in a hopeless situation. I know this isn't going to get me anywhere, but I don't know how to get out of this mentality. i just want to fucking beat myself up i'm so stupid. i'm tired of my same routine. i woke up. i go to the tumblr. i go to the reddit. i go to the amino and read 83928 things everyday. sometimes i feel like i'm crazy and all of those loa manifwst stuff or not real.

did i overcomplicated loa😭

oh dear😭 give yourself a break, honestly! manifesting isnt supposed to be stressful, but fulfilling. again, the only change that will be reflected is a change in SELF. you can see how well the 3d is doing it’s job at reflecting you rn. but it doesn‘t matter who the outer world says you are, you can ALWAYS change within just by deciding to. do you want to live like this? no. then stop! make it clear to you that you are the ONLY CREATOR and the only one who is being reflected. take responsibility for creating what you see outside of you, which also means that you can change SELF anytime you want to. imagination is the only reality and the only time that exists is NOW, self doesnt care about your past, it only cares about NOW. who are you right now? that will reflect.

i know it can be tough completely changing self, often youre even scared of letting go and assuming nothing can hurt you. at one point i even realized i was scared of actually seeing a change in the 3d. but that fear is created by you and no one can stop giving it so much credit except you.

stop consuming so much info, it‘s all the same anyways. choose desire, assume you have it, persist, done. the only thing that helped me really was actually FEELING LIKE I AM IN CONTROL OVER MY MIND. you can read anything you want, as many times as you want but you won‘t get it if you don‘t feel it true. edward art’s reddit series honestly helped me so much, but i actually feel different about the lines now than when i started reading it because i started giving MYSELF, my INNER SELF all the power. but tbh nothing on tumblr really explains it in as much detail as this series, it really gets the point across. if you want to read something about the loa, then go for this instead of posts that just repeat themselves. especially the posts about fear are eye-opening.

honestly in my opinion it doesn‘t matter what your subconscious does nor should you worry about it, it accepts literally ANYTHING to be true if you have faith. there is no past and no future, it doesnt matter. the only thing there is to do is change self and stick with it, no matter what happens. you are the only one who can save yourself.

again, no one can tell you how to feel, or feel for you, you have to give yourself the freedom of feeling but yourself. you are always able to change, it just depends on wether you decide to or not. decide to change and stick with it, no matter what. once you actually internalise that you create everything so you do not have to feel (identify with) your fears and doubts, but can instead feel (know) that you ALREADY ARE WHAT YOU WANT TO BE IN IMAGINATION, it gets easier and easier. but you must have the courage not to look back and fall into old states. why? because you don’t want to! fall in love with your new state and leaving gets harder and harder. but when you do, remind yourself that the 3d is literally just your mind. you don’t have to identify with anything you don‘t like. from there you can create what you WANT.

[notlushi]

Same anon with the same mealworms thank you for answering with so much info, yess ramble please! And since you’re taking questions, imma lay out all the questions in my brain rn. 

(I’m taking into count the character descriptions, the comics, and the two influencing AUs of Freakshow and Carnival) 

Is there some motivation behind the productions other than the already stated purpose of Gangle’s creative expression and amusement? Like are these being created for an outside audience that’s clueless of the truth (like Freakshow) or something else? 

Who is tip and rule??? I get they’re the comedy and tragedy masks, but are they Ais as well, the angel and devil on Gangle’s metaphorical shoulders? Do they only chill in gangle’s room or can they move? I suppose we’ll get more info on them in due time. 

Is Gangle sentient? since you say she is capable of experiencing human emotion and some what in understanding others emotions just that she’s not aware of how her actions will affect others. 

Soo where do the disembodied ribbons that dragged Jax off even come from? I suppose they just spawn. (I have a small head cannon that they no-clip from the walls, Gangle just has hundreds of ribbons inside the walls, ceilings and under the floor. They just shift and rithe in the walls, in complete silence the actors just hear the walls “breathing” but is just the hundreds of ribbons shifting. An ever present reminder that the director could just grab them off at a moment’s notice. Idk why just horrified myself thinking about that.) 

Do the actors work every day or do they have break days? Like the weekends or are work regulations nonexistent? 

Is death painful? Can the actors feel pain? We know there’s blood but do they also have guts and stuff (like freakshow)? Is it realistic how death works in this world, like would a bullet to the shoulder only injure while one to the heart kill? 

Can the actors fight back against Gangle (it’s probably a Herculean task but is it possible)? Can her ribbons be cut? Has  anyone ever tried to fight her? 

What range of punishments are even dished out and how often. I recon that backstage is the worst. Or at least that’s the illusion she’s probably trying to create but putting such mystery around it. Knowing the influences of this AU definitely something with murder or torture. 

You mentioned that gangle even creates Adventures, are those just more areas for filming or are they actually adventures that Gangle creates to build team cohesion or something? 

Is Gangle capable of puppeteering in this AU or is her control more so over the world? Would she do that if someone’s acting was bad or not exactly what she wanted or would she just scream and punish them? 

Are the productions all professional or can they get a bit silly? (Fanfic-y like carnival) 

Are the exit finding trio the main ones you’ll be focusing the story around? 

Wtf is bubble??? (I refuse to believe he is human he has to be an npc that they keep around or something, I’m so with Caine here. That thing freaks me out) 

Can humans have other roles of productions as well? Are there only actors or can there be mainly maintenance players? Or do the actors not involved in a project work as that? 

ABSTRACTION, so are there still abstractions/abstracted characters in this AU? What does Gangle do with them? They don’t seem to have been mentioned at all and the doors don’t have any indication of them. Kaufmo is still here, although still insane but not horrible to be around. I wonder if he’s not gone just cus of the existence of Caine to share ideas with. Kaufmo’s entry also says he saw exits exists, so Gangle did the Caine thing from the pilot or is it something completely different? 

Is there a lore reason Jax face ugly?/j 

Can we make/ put ocs in your AU? Tagging you fine? (Probably not gonna need this but it’s good to know boundaries) 

So what does it take to give and/or receive a hug from each of these fools??? (I just need to know- I need to know [and I feel it would tell more about their characters]) 

Anyways so that’s yeah. I’m genuinely truly sorry for this, I won’t be bothering you again- (I was not kidding about the worms) 

Just remember take your time, don’t stress yourself and most importantly have fun. And thank you for making this fun AU!

1. So the actors don’t go insane as well as entertainment for everyone.

2. They are like the bubble in this world but way more useful they give advice as well as orders. Kind of like 2 little henchmen. They float around where ever they want but mostly stick to gangles side.

3. Gangle is sentient.

4. They no-clip or spawn out of thin air, mostly just fade through the walls or floor.

5. The actors have breaks occasionally.

6. Death can be painful depending on how you die but it is not as painful as if they were in the real world. When respawning they do feel light headed and numb. Pain and death is a lot less painful in the digital Theater.

7. They can but best not too. You can cutting off Gangles ribbons but it will just respawn as if it was never gone.

8. Backstage is the worst punishment since anything can happen back there and the least is service such as cleaning.

9. Adventure always gets recorded. Kind of like the show “wipe out” but instead it’s gangles wacky ideas.

10. Gangle can puppeteer but is usually on mannikins or npcs. When gangle puppeteers an actor is usually for a twisted joke like “oh I’m jax and I do nothing alllllllll day!”

11. It’s the Amazing Digital Theater! If you blink in a middle of a serious scene a giant duck can show in the middle of the set!

12. Everyone will have a time to shine!

13. Bubble is bubble.

14. The actors can be in any type of production as long as they behave.

15. Abstractions still exist and they all go to the cellar.

16. Yes.

17. OMG YESSSS

18. Ragatha is your best is safest option when asking for a hug. She gives the best hugs too. Kinger just won’t hug you back. Caine will feel a bit disgusted. Bubble will just pop. Kaufmo and Pomni are too paranoid for hugs. Zooble “no”. Gangle will squeeze you too hard. Jax will literally back stab you.

I love answering these questions so much

[lovebvni]

Hey sorry to bother you, and be warned this is a LONG ask, but you seem like a cool person and i want your help with a weird experience I just had.

today I was looking at photos of liminal spaces and weirdcore stuff because it's my current obsession, and I decided it would be fun to walk around in these places. So I laid down and meditated and did some Wim Hof breathing, and then I visualized myself walking around in a weirdcore-ish house. I really vividly remember everything, like the cracks in the walls and the really dirty floor. I was like "holy shit this is amazing I'm doing weirdcore in real life". I walked around some more, and I was just touching everything and using all of my senses, like I could hear the TV static and I could smell musty carpet and so on. But then, something really weird happened.

I heard a noise like a little kid crying, so I went over and found a little boy with a messed-up face hiding in a closet. He was clearly very upset, and I was confused. He told me his name was Keith and his parents abandoned him in this house, and I guess he was left behind and he died? Anyways so I helped him, and he showed me his toys and stuff, and he had a basket of beanie babies, except now they were all moldy. He showed me where his body was too. I'm not going to get into the details, but it was horrifying.

Then we went outside, and there were trees everywhere. Keith told me that now that I had found him, he was at peace, and then he said goodbye and disappeared into a glowing blur in the sky.

At that point i suddenly sat up, and I was back in my bedroom. Does anyone know what happened?? I'm overwhelmed rn and honestly kind of scared. I don't think I shifted, and I was definitely awake. Please give me some advice, I need someone to explain what the f just happened to me.

okay, first of all, wow.. i’m very shocked by this. i haven’t heard anything like this before and honestly my intuition isn’t clarifying if this was a dream or a shift — but the specific detail about his face being messed up makes me feel like it was some sort of lucid dream.

augh!! i wish i was able to help more and as for sure, but let’s interpret it both ways.

first of all, if it was a dream, this is something that is connecting to her you personally. keith could represent your inner child, or something or someone in your mind who you have been struggling with.

if your past was hard, if you feel abandoned by your parents, then the inner child thing would make the most sense. him showing you thinks that are old and moldy… and even his body… i feel like that represents the inability to let go of the past. molding usually means you don’t get to the root of the issue, and a dead body being left… well it wasn’t cleaned up and buried properly. it wasn’t a grave, it was (what seems to be) a murder sight.

but also the fact he was inside.. it reminds me of inside by bo burnham. “well well, look who’s inside again / went out to look for a reason to hide again / well well buddy you find out / so come out with your hands up we got you surrounded.”

it feels like he realized it was finally time to confront everything, so he brought you — someone he could trust or lean on— through his life to try and explain it. he was scared, but he needed it.

he wanted a friend, and you’re that friend for him. when saying one is "at peace" it usually means they have come to terms with their sadness or anger, they can let go fo it, it is no longer a burdnen or something that holds them back. it is simply something that happened in the past.

i also got the idea that this could have been somes sort of vision. so.. do with that what you will. with this being you shifting, that possiblty, it could say you are some sort of spiritual guide for someone. the previous interpretations apply. i hope this helps you, and if you have any other like... info? like even if its graphic, i would love to hear it so we can try to figure it out!

love u anon!

[gege-wondering-around]

I hope your world is a happy one at the moment! 🩵I was wondering: what are some of the things that never fail to make you smile?

Hi darling, so sorry it took me so long to answer you! hope you are having an amazing day!💗

I've been thinking about your question since it first caught my eyes a few days ago and between thinking about the answe and dancing between drivers ed and working on my WIP i got lost in time!

Anyway!

my WIPs:

Something that never fails to make me smile are surely my WIPs! Ant time i work on them (rn only on one of'em) i get so happy with myself!

I have a very horrible memory so whenever i re-read something i wrote even a week ago, i don't remeber much of it and i get always surprised by what i wrote and by how much i like it (it's also the reason why sometimes i read the same fics without even noticing it till the end!)

I was always the kinda person who preferred to write than to speak, so I've been writing (poetry, little scenes without any connections, little works maybe never finished from when i was in middle school, and my WIPs now) for basically all my life! the major reason of why i started writing a while back was to express myself, my pain and my thoughts while i was going through a hard time in my life, but now I got to enjoy this as a way of being alive and it brightens my day to be able to write such wonderful things (I'll post a fic soon, so i promise there'll be some ground for this info in a little while).

here's a little thing i wrote in my latest fic (coming soon probably)

So, I basically love writing! I also learned english because i like writing and i never like writing in my native language...

my cat:

big old boy here is my good old pal Bounty! (nobody calls him that, but whatever ahah)

He is clumsy, fat, friendly, a ball of fur and a basic dork! He loves nothing more than to give and recieve love and he has an obsession with his food (he meows as loudly as possible when he wanna eat) and he has been by my side for 8 years now, from when i first got down a bad road to now (where i'm all better) and he has never left me!

Kindness:

It's not very tangible but it just makes me glad to have fought so i'm able to witness how kind people can be! It reminds me the world isn't just cruel and unfair, but it can be kind and caring especially when we are towards each other!

and to give you an example of kindness, i'll bring out a passion of mine i dont really talk about here...

big old pal here comes from an anime called Trigun, his name is Vash.

buddy had no other goal than to be kind to everyone in every way possible despite everyone was against him cause they thought he was the bad guy cause he was different than them (let's say, he is the personification of what keeps humanity going in the show) and buddy here wanted nothing more than to help and despite carrrying this huge big boy here

he didn't use to shot to anyone, his aim was always towards the bad guys' weapons to make them drop 'em and his air the excellent!

to me, old pal above is one of the many examples of kindness i can think about but i think i can give you another we are both familiar with...

(from pinterest)

i mean, if he isn't a symbol of kindness without pulling in any "big ones" of kindness (and by this i mean a more popular person), i don't know what else to say...

my spotify playlist of the moment:

just love these songs and i just sing them all day

and here they are!

those never fails to make me smile!

hope you're having an amazing day and im about to run to your ask box to ask the same cause im too curious now to know your answer to this🫂✨

forgive any typos <3

[huntedspy2]

gonna scream into the void for a second

trying to be more genuine with myself and others. Reaching out or complimenting people even if I'm scared to do so. opening up to people more, asking for help or setting boundaries. I also want to feel less scared of how I use tumblr. I want to be able to use my main blog without feeling like ill annoy others, or being more open about my kin identities. I often feel cringe for it which makes no sense because this is the "cringe website". like I can and should be myself this is my online experience

I was planning to redesign my blogs' structures before making the Big Switch but I think that's what's holding me back

For about a month now too I've been building a personal website on github purely for my gender hoard, kinlist, and pronoun/name info. It was originally for ponytown (lol) but it's been helping me improve my html and css skills andddd its been making me feel more inspired to make a general personal website

the ideas I have for a personal website would to just make it my place. I want to have info about my ocs on there, thoughts on certain media, random pages with useless shit that are there just because its fun. and I want to include stuff like the gender hoard and kinlist pages on there too because again, I want to be more genuine

I am the most stressed and anxious I've been in so long. my jaw clenching has started up again, I'm getting acne again, I constantly feel tense and my chest is always anxious feeling and tight, I've been losing the motivation to make meals and eat and losing energy. I cant keep up with college and at this point I don't know if I made the right choice in computer science. I have a passion for working with computers, but I realize now that passion leaned more towards the IT side of things and. im in CS. I have no motivation or ideas for doing projects outside of coursework unlike a lot of my peers. I'm closeted so I feel like I'm just fitting their stereotype of "girl cant do cs!!!!!". fuck!!!!!!!!

parents stressing me out and overall not taking into accountability I have disabilities

thats another thing, I haven't been able to get my ADHD properly treated since I got it diagnosed 4years ago. I also know im autistic but I dont want to get formally diagnosed bc of several issues, so speaking up for myself with that disability is impossible when my parents don't think im autistic and don't like self diagnosis

maybe its not too late to finish my degree and do a 180 and get into 3d modeling. I'm sure my passion with art could mesh with my programming skills there or something

I don't know who I am really. I always feel like other people have aesthetics or themes that fit them, and here I am with so many different interests in aesthetics and themes that I cant choose one. hoe do people choose a theme for a website? how do people decorate their profiles with a clear and solid theme? I feel like I always have 20 different themes that I want at the same time, its hard to choose one and have people only perceive that one with you

I have a headache rn

on the plus side i also had the tastiest clementine in possibly my whole life

I always remind myself I am only 21 I am so young in the grand scheme of things. but outside pressure wants me to know who I am at this exact moment. its so hard

fish and aquariums have quickly become a special interest within the last 2 months id say. im debating between a 10 or 20 gallon and what id stock it with. im thinking honey gourami and neon tetras and shrimp, but I love the idea of a betta fish or a crayfish. I've had to take care of a crayfish before they're lively little creatures

I want to be more social with people and make new friends or at least gaming friends, but im always apprehensive because I know ill be masking. need to try to open up more, might play more vrchat to socialize but its hard

[mosviqu]

idk how they are not embarrassed or how did they think that that's a normal thing to do🥸 WE CAN BURN SM TOGETHER THATS FOR SURE!!!

ahhh i agree i hope they realize soon that noise music is not really the way for every band😟 OOO IM GLAD U ENJOYED THEM!!!! yessss 3 I WAS SO HAPPY TO SEE THEM!!!! but im struggling so hard with recognizing them😭

WELL IF I WASNT LIED TO THEN YES SHE DID THAT!!!! UR REACTION😭THATS KIND OF FUNNY MY NGL

istg i started to associate u with him cuz of ur profile pic that u had it was such a nice pic!!! WELL I GUESS THAT BETTER THAN NOTHING (i feel like this sounds rude but i do not mean it in a rude way so i hope it doesn't come off that way) BUT I CANT BELIEVE EVERYBODY OTHER THAN TREASURE BASICALLY WAS DOING THAT CHALLENGE JUST SMH

aaaa i wish i could have other accents💔💔💔 i just have one general one and it just doesn't change so💔💔💔 lmao thats relatable but for me it never stays in my mind when i try to do a british accent i'm saying it loudly wrongly and proudly 😌🤞 (liebestraum anon💓)

LIKE they woke up and were like hm. lets send a truck to hybe. TO BOYCOTT ALL THE HARD WORK OUR FAVS DID WHEN LEARNING THE DANCE. sigh. anyways!

okay update since the boys debuted- i only vibed with the title track (?) so its a 😔 for me. but i adOOORED that song its such a feel good song and their concept is so cute i love it but i dont see myself listening to the other two songs....😔😔😔 mourning the 03 liners very deeply rn 💔 BUT BUT BUT you know what i remembered the other day ??? LIKE I LEGIT WANTED TO MESSAHE U ABT THIS but basically i got reminded of p1harmony's existence again, right, (bc i forget abt groups when i am not hyperfixated on them lol) AND I REMEMBERED INTAK IS A 03 LINER so. our crew so far consists of doyoung, seunghan, intak aNd us two. (Also im pretty sure minjae from mcnd is a 03 liner too bc i had a mental breakdown over that too when i was getting into them like 2 years ago 👀)

I HAD NO IDEA THAT HAPPENED LMAOOO THANKU FOR TELLING ME I FEEL LIKE THIS IS AN IMPORTANT INFO 😭😭😭😭 has the same energy as keeho having a stan account before being an idol LMAOO.

i was NOT a wilbur fan when hearing that song let me tell u it was on the speakers every other day i was so annoyed

im gonna cry thAT pic was so adorable wasnt it 🥺🥺🥺 like he may be 4 years older than me but i go all protective over dino like anyone dare to hurt him and i will SWING like i know how to fight. try me. TRY ME. also u never sound rude omg stop worrying abt that 😭💕 and LITERALLY i also dont get it like they arw the biggest svt fanboys and THEY DIDNT DO THE CHALLENGE ?? 😭

no bc my accent changes depending on the amount of english i speak out loud too like the less often i speak it the more slovak i sound 🤡 i dont have eng classes anymore so the only opportunity i have to speak eng is when im sending voice memos to my peruvian bestie and like the other day i listened back to it and i cringed so hard bc my english really got rUSTY 😭😭😭 i should like record vlogs so i dont lose my accent or something idk. also SPEAK THAT BRITISH ACCENT LOUD AND PROUD. show them what the uk youtube scene did to us.

[srirachvbi]

Sakusa as a dad headcanons !

request: not requested, just a sudden urge to write more of how i think he’d be as a father... I swear I can write headcanons other that dad ones but they’re so much fun to write aasdfjalk i’ll post other ones soon i swear 

a/n: okay so i know i have asks to answer and headcanons to finish but i really wanted to write and establish how Omi would be as a father because my headcanons didn’t portray it that well... and i like writing for Omi. Oh and fun fact! I’m running out of Sakusa gifs to use so i’m gonna keep reusing the same ones from previous posts probably warning(s): none i think besides the occasional cursing probably? 

Sakusa Kiyoomi

In my previous headcanons, I think I made it seem like Omi was grossed out by his kid cause babies are messy but he’s not lol

He’s just struggling to adapt to fatherhood and taking care of Toshi on his own was kind of stressful for him 

He got really stressed out when Hitoshi was starting to walk and would literally hover over the poor bab because he wanted to make sure nothing bad happened to him

Omi would spend nights in the nursery just watching Hitoshi sleep, making sure he was okay

The first time Hitoshi got sick, Omi spent every second by his side

Yes, he hated the thought of getting sick too but he was more worried that something awful was going to happen the second he stepped out of the nursery

You had to remind him that it was just a small cold and the doctor said it was nothing too serious

Hitoshi got the same disgust and fear of germs that his father has and the two bond over that a lot

They’ll both wear the same disgusted face and it makes you laugh (you took a picture of them doing it once and now it’s your lock screen cause you love your boys <3)

Talking about Omi overstressing himself

Oh my god when you were pregnant you almost killed him because he was always hovering

He didn’t let you do SHIT

“Yoomi I can heat up ramen by myself.”

“No you can’t. You’ll burn yourself.”

There’s no arguing with him really

When Hitoshi first began school, you had to bribe him out of his room because he “didn’t want to go near the gross kids”

You ended up attaching a bottle of hand sanitizer to his little bookbag and he ofc was wearing a mask 

LMAO when Hitoshi first met the team (msby), he had heard what his dad had said about atsumu before and scowled at the poor guy when he tried to greet him

Atsumu: due to personal reasons i will be passing away now <3

He almost had a heart attack because Hitoshi literally just looked like a much shorter Omi at that moment

Hinata really respects Hitoshi’s (and Sakusa’s) hatred of germs and let Hitoshi get comfortable before making physical contact with him (he didn’t want the poor bab to freak out)

Bokuto tries to get a high five from Hitoshi for the whole day

Right before Hitoshi leaves, Bokuto’s almost defeated but he holds his hand up for a high five and Hitoshi delicately hits his tiny palm against Bo’s bigger one and suddenly Bokuto’s crying

“Why are you crying, Bokuto-san”

“AKAASHI HE GAVE ME A HIGH FIVE” 

After the first time Sakusa was left alone with Hitoshi when he was a bab, he got much better

He knows how to change Hitoshi’s diaper without much of a mess and he doesn’t stress himself out as much as the last time

He knew how to change a diaper tho because he had watched you for weeks as you did

Sakusa keeps his kids out of the public and doesn’t really show off his private life at all

Lmao no one knew you guys were dating in the public and suddenly he just tweeted a picture at your guys’ wedding with the whole MSBY team in the background of you guys

It’s a competition to see which journalist can get the most info out of him during interviews

No one’s successful

Everyone knows you guys have a kid but they’ve never really seen him

Well, they’ve seen the back of his head and a small glimpse at his eyes but it’s hard to really see him when he’s wearing a mask and a small little baby hat

Komori also babysits for you guys whenever he’s visiting because he “wants you guys to have some alone time and can take care of Hitoshi”

Hitoshi loves Komori-- it’s cute

Sometimes you’ll come home from work and will find Sakusa asleep on the couch with Hitoshi on top of him and you’re just

WEAK

You took a picture of them like that and it’s your home screen <3

So, 

Sakusa’s a really good dad but he had his bumps and hiccups in the beginning

I swear I’ll write something over than the guys as dads... I will... I swear...

I’ll also finish the requests soon but I wanted to write something other than a request rn lol

Sakusa as a dad would be wonderful i love him

[ndeyebaby]

im close to giving up.

ok so, i need some help at loa so i wanna tell about my situation. i'm willing to solve it by myself as this is my reality, but i'm lost about some important stuff. no pressure but it would be really useful if i got a reply.

here's what happening: I've overconsumed info for months. i know almost everything ig. self concept, victim mentality, states, sats, void, lullaby, limiting beliefs, embodying, mental diet, persisting, affirming, etc.. but i don't know how to apply them. i mean- whenever someone asks "omg my life is awful rn how do i change that" loa blogs usually say persist and affirm, but as silly as this sounds... what does it truly mean?

is persisting just affirming and thinking about how you have your desire (reminding yourself u could say). another thing loa blogs never really say is those two things: 1) how to do any method that requires u to be drowsy- when you have insomnia? and 2) how to embody who you want to be when you have adedonia/apathy? 3) how to remember TO do affs and knowing u have your stuff? 4) how to ignore what the 3d is showing. should u just do a mental diet and avoid EVERYTHING negative, even jokes such as "i should kms"?

not gonna traumadump ofc, ik y'all aren't therapists and i can just revise that, but while i don't, then how can i change my situation fast?

i don't wanna be impatient but i wish i could know how, because while i did overconsume I'm still clueless about this. especially because of how i got stuff that gets in my way. i need to do something that works super fast, like IKK if u assume that if it works fast then it will, but then again.. what is assuming? now you may be thinking "this cannot be real, imagine being this stupid" but english is not my first language (despite me speaking it fairly well ig?), and the translator doesn't make it clear as to what it means honestly... so dumb it down for me.

tl;dr: i need to change my whole reality and need to know how to do it fast, but also i need detailed instructions on the meaning of the terms commonly used because my mother language doesn't feel "close" to it yk. if possible i want to know about something that works in one month or so (again ik u can change it instantly if u assume it but dumb it down), because i don't wanna spend another year living like this.

Hello!!

Sorry for the late response as I’ve been a bit busy,,

I get that you’ve over consumed but you seem a bit confused? But let’s get back to the basics.

Imagining creates reality.

Your imagination is the only reality. Not anything you can physically see, feel, hear, and touch.

God is not some man in the sky or some sadistic being who hates women and gay people. He is your own wonderful human imagination.

You want to change your reality? Fair. Your desires are god-given rights.

Dwell in your new reality in imagination and feel it. What I mean is, experience it. This video is useful.

You don’t have to deal with your undesired reality anymore. Take your attention away from it by focusing on your desired reality in your mind, knowing that it will reflect outwardly.

Feel free to message me if you need it 💕💕 ily

[quinntheebrain]

Hi there! I was wondering if you could do a jealous bokuto x f!reader (preferably if not then gn! is fine). Like he gets jealous of his bby and kuroo getting along really well... a little too well lmao. Anyways, I hope your day/night is going great ya wonderful person <3

Pairing: Jealous!Bokuto Kōtarō x fem!reader

Warnings: implied alcohol use, a temporarily sad Bokuto, Ummm I curse????

A/N: *deep heavy sigh* I looked over this 1000x lmfao. I’m used to writing fics and not hcs, so they’re probably not the best (I gotta stop doubting myself). I’m always so nervous to share my writings, but this a learning process! Thanks for being my first request. It’s been a while since I wrote anything seriously and shared it. I really hope you enjoy it :) Also, somebody else (who I can’t think of rn) hc that Bokuto doesn’t drink, I just agree wholeheartedly. 

Oh, my precious baby Bokuto. He’s so cute it hurts🥺. 

He gets jealous easily. 

He’s so lively that people naturally gravitate toward him. So, he’s used to being the center of attention. 

Even though the only person’s attention he really cares about is yours.

Bokuto loves the way you look at him when he makes you smile. He loves the feeling of just being in your presence.

So, when he sees you and Kuroo smiling and laughing from across the bar he’s irritated. 

And when the two of you get a little too close for comfort, he’s fuming

...but for some reason, I feel like he wouldn’t say anything

Now, Bokuto would normally shut that shit down instantly.

But it’s Kuroo, his closest friend. He doesn’t want any kind of confrontation. He doesn’t want to cause a scene (I believe Bokuto could beat Kuroo’s ass)

So, he says nothing and instead spends the night alternating between super soft/affectionate and super distant. 

He’ll bring it up in private though. Half-jokingly asking if you’d prefer Kuroo to him. 

And when the conversation turns serious 

Don’t invalidate his feelings, don’t make him feel crazy. (he’ll curl up in a ball and it will be a long time before he opens up to you again)

RE-AS-SUR-ANCE!!!!!!!! He needs it; he will die without it. Please just tell this boy how much you love him. 

And please believe he doesn’t blame you alone. He talks to Kuroo after he talks to you.

Because next time, Bokuto won’t be so nice :)

This is the third time Kuroo has put his arm around you; Bokuto is counting. He watches you from across the room as he holds a conversation with Akaashi; though, at this point, his friend’s words are nothing more than background noise. 

You are supposed to be with them, but once Kuroo challenges you to a drinking contest, Bokuto knows it’s a lost cause. You promise to join him shortly and though he doesn’t believe you, he nods as if he does. Unlike you, and most of his friends, Bokuto doesn’t drink; he just doesn’t like the taste, but he wants you to have a good time. So, he goes to sit with Akaashi by himself but not before leaning down and pulling you into a soft kiss. Bokuto’s large palm caresses your cheek as his mouth moves delicately against your own; It’s quick and gentle, but it’s effective. His lips linger on yours just long enough to leave you wanting more; it’s a reminder that he’ll be waiting for you. 

But, 15 minutes have passed and you’re still glued to Kuroo’s side. 

Now, you’re a giggling mess, teasing one of your boyfriend’s closest friends, who seems to be enjoying the attention a little too much. The rest of their volleyball buddies watch and laugh, most of them far too inebriated to find anything wrong with the way the two of you are interacting. Bokuto, on the other hand, finds everything wrong with it. He watches you with narrow eyes and tightly clenched fists, trying his hardest to keep his composure.

“Your jealousy is showing,” Akaashi smirks at his best friend; Bokuto hasn’t been listening to a word he says. He wants to tease him about it but now doesn’t seem like the time. “Why don’t you just tell them it’s bothering you?” 

“They’re not doing it on purpose,” Bokuto sighs as he unclenches his fists, wiggling his fingers to crack his knuckles. “Besides, there was a time she couldn’t even be in the same room as Kuroo. I’m glad they’re friends now and if I say something I might ruin it.” he looks away from you and instead focuses on the ground. 

“Forget about Kuroo,” Akaashi says, slightly irritated. “What about you? If you don’t talk to her, you might ruin your relationship. You don’t want to harbor resentment toward the one you love,” Akaashi glances at Bokuto, who is unable to reply. They stand in silence for a short time. Akaashi doesn’t want to bombard Bokuto with advice; he knows that sometimes, a few thoughtful words are enough. “Look, it’ll be okay. I have to go.” Akaashi pats Bokuto’s shoulder, leaving him alone to think about the situation. 

Bokuto is truly happy that you and Kuroo have finally learned to get along but deep down, a part of him wishes the two of you never stopped the incessant bickering; part of him wishes that you still disliked Kuroo and he disliked you. Maybe, the petty arguments were nothing but an attempt to mask the attraction you felt toward each other but honestly, that’s what Bokuto would prefer. Because what’s happening now — you and Kuroo openly fawning over each other — is driving him crazy. 

I’m just imagining things, he thinks to himself. Maybe, there is no real meaning to the way the two of you are carrying on; but, watching as Kuroo embraces you in a hug that lingers a little longer than it should doesn’t ease his mind. Your face buried into Kuroo’s chest, his hands pressed firmly against your lower back as he rocks you side to side, it’s a bit more than Bokuto can handle. The thought of you in someone else’s arms so intimately bothers him, and pulling out your phone to take Kuroo’s contact info is the icing on the cake. 

Still, you’d never know how much it affects Bokuto because he approaches you like there’s nothing wrong, and though he tugs you away from Kuroo rather possessively, he does it with the brightest smile. “Alright, ready babe?” He looks down to you with those golden eyes, glimmering with adoration as he places a kiss on your forehead. You nod ‘yes’ quickly. “See you later, bro.” you both wave at his friends once more before the two of you exit the bar. 

A weight lifts from Bokuto’s shoulders as the door shuts behind him; the absence of his best friend shouldn’t put him at ease, but it does. Still, Bokuto has another problem. 

You don’t want to harbor resentment toward the one you love. Akaashi’s words play in his head like a broken record. If he doesn’t settle this now, he never will. His insecurities will continue to fester until he can no longer look at you the same.

“You and Kuroo were pretty cozy tonight,” he fakes a chuckle as he peers at you from the corner of his eye. “I’m glad you two are so close now.”

“Cozy?” you scrunch up your face. You could count the number of times Kuroo touched you on one hand (which was still too many for Bokuto).  You will admit that you spent an unusual amount of time with Kuroo, but he’s more entertaining when he’s drunk; it’s actually your favorite time to be around him. “Hardly. If anything,” you pause, “Wait a minute. Ko, are you jealous?” you manage to suppress your smile, but there's a hint of amusement in your tone. 

He doesn’t answer your question; it’s embarrassing enough to even be feeling this way and for you to call him out so quickly only makes it worse. He takes a deep breath, “Y/N,” Bokuto’s voice is barely above a whisper. “Do you ever think you’d be better off with Kuroo? I mean the two of you actually have a lot in common, and I just think-” the words sound crazy now that he’s finally saying them out loud. 

“No,” you say sternly and confidently, cutting off your boyfriend before he has the chance to ramble on. It’s reassuring how quick you are to shut the notion down. “Besides, we really only have one thing in common,” you pause in your tracks, forcing Bokuto to stop and look at you. 

“What’s that?”

“We both love you so much,” you can’t help but smile as you speak. Bokuto has such amazing people in his life and that warms your heart. “We would never try to hurt you; I would never try to hurt you. I’m so sorry for even making you feel like that.” the apology is sincere. Your glossy eyes are a giveaway. “If I haven’t made this clear, you are the only one for me. It’s you and me, together forever,” he wipes away a single tear; you hadn’t even realized you were crying. You never wanted to make him feel this way; he’s never sounded so defeated. Was he going to just hand you over to his best friend? Did he think you would accept that? “But really, Kuroo?” you pretend to vomit to lighten the mood. It makes you both laugh, something you desperately needed. 

“I love you,” Bokuto sighs in relief.  

“I love you too.” flinging your arms around his neck, you kiss him. 

There’s something almost enchanting about the way he immediately takes the lead. He doesn’t care about the taste of liquor that lingers in your mouth or the fact that you still smell like Kuroo’s cologne; at this moment, Bokuto only cares about you. His lips glide over yours passionately, yet ever so gently; your tongue sporadically teases his bottom lip, his teeth occasionally nibble on yours. It’s a steady rhythm that makes you weak in the knees. His hands find their way to your waist, then to your back, sliding down until they’re secure in your back pockets. 

Bokuto pulls away, pressing his forehead against yours. “Let’s get home, yeah?” he squeezes your ass before he removes his hands from your pocket; intertwining his fingers with yours, Bokuto starts to walk again. 

“Yeah,” you repeat with a smile on your face, nodding eagerly as he pulls you down the sidewalk. 

[6okuto]

hiii so. I want to try writing for the last legacy #gang but. I’m afraid of messing up their characters hdjdfhbfb do you. have any advice on this🧍

OMGG....i am so honoured rn. that is so exciting ok,, ok ok ok i can give u. what i do and little notes i keep in my head

general

read other people's hcs if you're stuck !! even if it wasn't the same prompt it might help u get a better idea of the Energy Needed

also like,,, if they remind me of certain characters i'll even look at other hcs from different media. (haikyuu) rime works(ish?) when you look up tsukishima ,, sage works when i look up atsumu,, etc. in case there isn't enough/the right LL content for you

you can even like, look at memes,, if you just scroll the LL twt or ig. they might help too

i take screenshots of their dialogue so i can easily look back :]

looking at the dialogue choices might help bc they'll emphasize important parts of their character (and how they could diverge)

if Ur like Me and never remember what happened ever,, i fr just keep their wiki pages open. there isn't a lot of plot info on there (literally none for the m3) so i stare at the cgs/trivia/profiles and Hope For The Best.

if ur really stuck there's no harm in asking for someone else's opinion ! if u don't have anyone to ask u can ask Me :100: /srs

and tbh it's ok if u change ur mind about things,, i've said stuff and disagreed later because i saw someone else's hcs but that's just life sometimes. we accept (cringe) and move on

felix

more formal than usual. going > gonna , allow > let (sometimes) (my thing of him being 1/2 thesaurus searches away from casual)

he's easily flustered (he's whipped) but he Can tease,, just maybe after a few seconds of glitching

All of them would do whatever mc needs but i see felix as especially a comforter when they're upset (might panic at first)

route has a lot about growth and acceptance/forgiveness

for angst: isn't listened to, insecurities of his skills/interests, fear of being alone again

sage

tease,, obviously. innuendos, jokes, smirks, etc

ideas of protection/love have roots in him being dangerous + not being worth it (e.g. telling mc they should have stayed on earth)

distractor + eventual solver, one to threaten to fight

route has themes of allowing yourself to be vulnerable, choosing kindness in the face of rage/violence

for angst: not being able to protect mc, mc realizing that he was right in his fears before leaving, finally breaking down and being vulnerable

anisa

tbh. i'm still unsure of her characterization myself i speedran her route and need to go through it again But.

whenever i think i need to loosen up i remember rivath (running to touch things, eating soap </3, kissing in public, etc.)

>> her relationship with mc lets her do these things—they let her relax and be,, more chaotic,, than when she's on duty. girlboss

would be a comforter + listener i think

her route has a lot with learning to trust yourself and figuring out what you want/what you think is right

for angst: doing the wrong thing, not doing enough, fear and insecurities surrounding her father/what she did

rime

asshole /lh a lot of snarky/teasing replies and fighting

when you ask him to do something he's the guy who says no while doing it. he's going to help, just not (always) easily

redemption/lover arc rime is capable of being gentler/softer than he is now (e.g. him with felix in sage ch.13)

comforter/solver . a hot take? i don't know. i see him as listening and offering his opinion while reassuring, willing to hug/cuddle

no route. but ideas of choosing to be better, finding out who you are and where you fit

for angst: fear of being left behind, insecurities of his place with the M3 and MC, regret over his past and what he does to them, playing with the idea of him Not having a redemption

at the end of the day just trust urself !! even without actively recalling specific details, just playing the game and having a general Vibe gets u farther than u might think. I live/write off guesses and vibe checks alone. i am shocked to this day at people agreeing with and enjoying my posts 🤨

also. prioritize yourself and your own enjoyment . you are doing this for the 3 F's. fun, fantasies, Free. if you want to take a break then you Take A Break. i'm cheering u on i'm sure u will be great :muscle:

[xcrystalzero]

heyo! i saw that matchups were open, would it be ok if i requested a romantic one too? if you wanna i would love a platonic matchup as well but i understand if not possible (*´ω｀*)

im a 15 year old, bi girl with a male preference :D

my height is 5'2, im an infp pisces! i have messy short black hair, blue eyes and my body type is chubby :]

i have a baby face as well, people always telling me how cute or young i look than my actual age and it kinda annoys me

im an introvert, and somehow i forget things a lot. i hate seeing people sad or upset and i find myself sugarcoating my words to make them at least feel happy,, im very shy when approaching new people or when making friends. i have low self esteem and i get flustered easily

some things i like are poems, im currently learning on how to make poems rn! my favourite foods would be pasta, any type of noodles or yummy pastries (≧▽≦) i have deep interest towards musical instruments like the piano or violin but i never have the chance to actually play them

some things i dislike would be not being able to defend myself and not knowing what to do or say when im talking to someone ive never met before

i get very clingy and protective when im attached to someone and i love trying out new things but sometimes i stay in my comfort zone as well

this is already a lot of info, i hope you can do mine but if not that's ok! take care :D

Hello darling! Some matchups for you coming right up!

Platonically, I match you with ... Noelle!

-You guys are strikingly similar so I feel like you'd be pretty good friends!

-You lift her up, she lifts you up! Neither of you can stand seeing other people sad or not believing in themselves so you're not going to let each other worry too much.

-Once a week, you guys work together to whip up a new batch of pastries and then feed them to all of the Knights the next morning. It turns into a cute little ritual that everyone loves.

-Noelle is a little protective, but she also understands your desire to be able to defend yourself. Sometimes, you accompany her on her Favonius training so the both of you can be ready for anything!

Romantically, I match you with ... Xingqiu!

-Oh man, I can already imagine the dates. Spending the day apart to write poems about each other and then meeting for dinner and exchanging them! Attending recitals as people who can actually enjoy classical music!

-At first, he's a bit scared of your clinginess, just because he's never had anyone act like that to him before, but he begins to really like it the closer you two get.

-Whether it's trying out new things or staying in your comfort zone, he's willing to try anything with you!

-He's got a great memory and he's pretty organized so he'll remind you any time you forget something. That being said, he gets distracted by his books pretty easily so you may have to annoy him for a bit if you want him to pay attention to you for a long time.

[booksfromblackwood]

Is anyone still around in this fandom? If so, I thought I’d post the first chapter of an old fic that I re-wrote last year! Let me know if anyone’s still around, and if you’d be interested in reading more! Hope everyone reading this has a great day! :)

Han has left the chat.

Three Days Before The Disappearance

.Sam.Giddings. added josh_wash, ashleeeeey, xXGamerChrisXx, TheOriginalMatt, HanButterfly, BethWash, Mike_Munroe, EmilyD_, and _Jess.Riley_ to the chat.

.Sam.Giddings. named the chat Info For Tomorrow.

.Sam.Giddings.: Hey guys! Just to keep everyone updated on our travel plans for tomorrow! I know it's going to be a long day for everyone so it's vital we stick to the plan and stay in our groups where possible!

ashleeeeey: Okie-doodle!!

TheOriginalMatt: How are you so organised, Sam? You're a lifesaver!

HanButterfly: Hi!!

BethWash: trust sam to be more prepared than those of us organising the trip lol

xXGamerChrisXx: Since when was 'okie-doodle' a thing?

EmilyD_: Thanks Sam x

xXGamerChrisXx: And thanks so much, sam!

.Sam.Giddings.: So quick reminder of everyone's groups:

_Jess.Riley_: I'm stoked!!

ashleeeeey: That's rich coming from someone whose username is xXGamerChrisXx! :P

.Sam.Giddings.: Ash, Chris, Matt, and myself will start the journey first tomorrow morning.

xXGamerChrisXx: You wound me!

Mike_Munroe: Thanks for the plan, Sam!

TheOriginalMatt: Excited to see everyone tomorrow! This is going to be a killer weekend for sure!!

.Sam.Giddings.: Em, Mike, and Jess, you guys are next.

ashleeeeey: You're so dramatic!! XD

Mike_Munroe: Team Two here we go!!

xXGamerChrisXx: Made you smile, though! ;-)

josh_wash: what about us

.Sam.Giddings.: I'm just getting to that!

ashleeeeey: True :)

xXGamerChrisXx: You guys are already there and are therefore irrelevant! :P

.Sam.Giddings.: Han, Beth, and Josh, you guys are there already!

josh_wash: thanks cochise i feel so appreciated

BethWash: lol thanks chris

Mike_Munroe: So, what are we all up to?

BethWash: i found cake

xXGamerChrisXx: Browsing reddit like a nerd XD

ashleeeeey: Listening to Sam's rundown of tomorrow unlike sOmE pEoPlE *coughcoughChris*

EmilyD_: Honestly just packing my final things with Jess. Mike's mostly watching the TV.

xXGamerChrisXx: :-(

.Sam.Giddings.: So, tonight we should all make sure our bags are packed and that we have our passports and tickets ready!! Set your alarms for the right times (depending on your group) and make sure to sleep early too (especially if you're in my group since tomorrow will be an early start for us)!

ashleeeeey: :)

TheOriginalMatt: 5am gang where we AT?

HanButterfly: Beth where are you rn? Because I want some of that cake!!

.Sam.Giddings.: So Team One (myself, Chris, Ash, and Matt), we need to be up by 5:00am and be ready by 5:30am for the taxi to the airport!! Matt and Chris, yours is going to be at Chris' place at 5:24 for some reason so make sure to be ready!!

BethWash: the lodge kitchen bcos where else would there be cake han lol

.Sam.Giddings.: We'll meet up at the airport when we arrive! Once we re-group, we'll check in, probably eat some breakfast whilst we wait, and then catch the 8:30 plane!!

TheOriginalMatt: Sweet!

ashleeeeey: Can't wait! :)

josh_wash: yo matt you surviving the puns

.Sam.Giddings.: Team Two - you guys don't have to be up until around 9:00am since your taxi is at 9:20 and then your plane is at 11:30!

HanButterfly: Josh would you like me to save you some cake before we eat it all? :)

EmilyD_: We'll need a little longer than 20 minutes to all get ready but sure x

TheOriginalMatt: Just about! Myself and Chris have mostly been playing on his PS4 so I've been distracting myself with that! XD

josh_wash: yes please!

josh_wash: i feel for ya bro, a whole evening with chris' puns can prove fatal

josh_wash: you die of cringe

Mike_Munroe: Poor ol' Chris XD

.Sam.Giddings.: Once we arrive and get our bags, we need to catch the 2:30pm train and then the 4:20 bus! After that we have to take the 5:40 bus (I sent you guys screenshots of the route yesterday) and get off at Blackwood Pines ready for our hike up the mountain (with a little help from the cable car, of course)!

xXGamerChrisXx: I'm being BULLIED guys :(

ashleeeeey: Aw, poor Chris! :P

josh_wash: jk XD

TheOriginalMatt: I like how Sam's still here typing all we need to know whilst we're talking about cake and puns XD

.Sam.Giddings.: Team Two, you guys need to catch either the 5:30pm or the 6:00pm train depending on when your stuff arrives. After that you'll need to get the 7:50 bus and then the 8:40 bus to Blackwood Pines (you have to specify you want it to stop there or the driver won't stop) before you head up. Remember to lock the cable car station once you get in, Mike!

josh_wash: oh gosh tHE CAKE

Mike_Munroe: Gotcha' Sam!

HanButterfly: No worries, Josh! I managed to save most of it from Beth!

BethWash: rip my chance at a third slice of cake

_Jess.Riley_: Really, thanks Sam! We're all packed and ready to go! Xx

HanButterfly: It's really going to be such an awesome weekend! I can't wait :D

ashleeeeey: Thank you so much for inviting me! I've never been on something like this before!! :D

TheOriginalMatt: Yeah, thank you so much guys! I can't wait either, Han!!

.Sam.Giddings.: Have we got rooms sorted out for the lodge, guys?

BethWash: ash take the plans away from sam so she can have time to relax lol

EmilyD_: I'm with Mike in the room away from everyone like agreed right x

ashleeeeey: I'm trying but she won't let me! XD

HanButterfly: I mean if needs be we can sort out rooms once we're here! If not maybe we just sort out the first night rooms since it'll be fairly late when everyone arrives and then we can adjust them as needed as the trip goes on!

BethWash: lol poor sam will be up all night organising at this rate

.Sam.Giddings.: Sounds good, Han!

Mike_Munroe: Great idea, Hannah!

BethWash: em, yours and mike's room (upstairs guest) may not be ready first night so is it possible for you to share a room with jess til we get a chance to sort it out tomorrow?

EmilyD_: That's fine, hon. Thank you again for the trip and for letting us use the upstairs guest room x

josh_wash: how about for the first night emily and jess share beth's room and then beth sam and han go in hannah's room

josh_wash: mike can go to the small room downstairs if he's alright w/ that and matt can room w/ me

xXGamerChrisXx: Yo dude you forgot ash

ashleeeeey: It's alright, Chris! I can find somewhere!

EmilyD_: Ash you're honestly lovely but I'd kinda' like to be with either Jess or Mike if that's alright xx

ashleeeeey: No problem, Emily! I wouldn't want to intrude! :)

EmilyD_: Knew you'd understand xx

josh_wash: why dont you and ash share a room cochise

xXGamerChrisXx: I thought I was rooming with you and matt?

josh_wash: bro please just think for a minute here

ashleeeeey: I'm not sure.

xXGamerChrisXx: Beth, han, and sam, is there any room with you guys?

ashleeeeey: I'm really sorry to be a bother!!

.Sam.Giddings.: Of course you can room with us, Ash! We'd love to have you with us! :)

BethWash: im with sam

HanButterfly: Of course!!

xXGamerChrisXx: Thank you to the only valid washington kids right now!

josh_wash: -_-

xXGamerChrisXx: I see what you're doing, josh. ha ha, we've had our laugh, now please stop before this weekend.

Mike_Munroe: Rough subject, huh?

josh_wash: bro chill you know i was just joking

ashleeeeey: I'm really sorry!! Please don't get upset with each other!

xXGamerChrisXx: No ash it's alright! i promise i'm not actually mad! :-)

josh_wash: he acts mad over text to get his point across but he literally just sits there with a blank expression irl XD

TheOriginalMatt: Is Sam still there, Ash? Haven't heard from her in a while!

TheOriginalMatt: Gotta check up on my plane buddy for tomorrow!!

_Jess.Riley_: Did you guys get window seats or middle isle seats? I got a middle isle and the others got a window!

BethWash: she hasn't drowned in her notes has she lol

TheOriginalMatt: We got two sets of window seats! Though I don't know which of us is actually going to be at the window and which one will be window isle!

ashleeeeey: She's just brushing her teeth! Her mom came in and brought us a load of vegan snacks for the trip tomorrow and now I'm even more excited!!

ashleeeeey: Speaking of which, I'm probably going to head to sleep in a minute! Though I'm not sure how much I'll actually get since I'm so excited!!! :)

xXGamerChrisXx: Sleep well, ash. see you in the morning :-)

ashleeeeey: Night, Chris :)

ashleeeeey has left the chat.

_Jess.Riley_: Well that was cute!

xXGamerChrisXx: People say goodnight to eachother! that's a normal human interaction!

_Jess.Riley_: You know full well it's cute when it's you two

.Sam.Giddings.: Ash told me she logged out so I came to say goodnight!

josh_wash: w/ jess on this one bro

HanButterfly: Goodnight, Sam!

BethWash: night sam!

josh_wash: dont let the bedbugs bite!

TheOriginalMatt: See you bright and early tomorrow!!

.Sam.Giddings.: See you at the airport/lodge, guys!

xXGamerChrisXx: Night!

.Sam.Giddings. has left the chat.

BethWash: its cute because you like eachother chris

xXGamerChrisXx has left the chat.

HanButterfly: Aww, don't tease the poor guy!

TheOriginalMatt: Chris says goodnight, as do I! Can't wait to see you all tomorrow!

BethWash: night guys!

TheOriginalMatt has left the chat.

josh_wash: night!

Mike_Munroe: Make sure to save me a slice of that cake, Han! I gtg!

Mike_Munroe has left the chat.

HanButterfly: Goodnight Mike :)

EmilyD_: We'd best be off too. See you all in the morning.

_Jess.Riley_: Night x

EmilyD_ has left the chat.

BethWash: night

HanButterfly: Goodnight x

josh_wash: night xxxxxxyzqvp

_Jess.Riley_: Ha ha, very funny. Get that one from Chris?

josh_wash: lol night

_Jess.Riley_ has left the chat.

BethWash: PLEASE can i have some more cake, han?

josh_wash: you guys can literally just talk if you wanted

HanButterfly: Nope! Gotta' save some for Mike~

BethWash: you wont shut up about that for the rest of the evening now, will you?

BethWash: lol

HanButterfly: :P

josh_wash: you guys gossip in the kitchen

josh_wash: imma head to bed

BethWash: night bro

HanButterfly: Sleep well!

josh_wash has left the chat.

BethWash: please?

HanButterfly: No :P

BethWash: ugh night sis

HanButterfly: Night, Beth! XD

BethWash has left the chat.

HanButterfly has left the chat.

[astrojoy]

Hello dear! I made an account on Tumblr only to ask you a question 😬🙏 I've seen that you are answering different questions so I'm gonna try 😁 This is my natal chart:

I'm wondering if I should take a course for yoga teachers that begins in a few days. It's quite expensive and I'll have to save and spend all my money on that (and I'll be broke probably) because I'll have to travel to another city every weekend. The course lasts 7 months and it is pretty challenging. I have been doing yoga for 4 years now and I would like to learn more about it (one astrologer told me that I'm going to be a yoga teacher) but Saturn in my first house is always giving me so many opstructions so I'm afraid that I can't make it at the moment😞 Whenever I start something new I get sick or I get severe anxiety (this summer I quit antidepressant). Now I feel stronger mentally but I'm still worried. On the other side yoga si the only think that I'm interested in rn and I'm sure I'll manage somehow to finish the course but I'm not if I want to torture myself rn. 😆 Sooo is it better for me to wait (maybe next year will be easier since Jupiter is going to enter my ascendant) or should I take a leap? Thank you in advance! 🙏🙏🙏🍀🧡

Hey no problemo! I don't mind helping!

So just a few things real quick, and I'm sure you already know this because by looking at your chart, you're quite knowledgeable 🥰 however I will remind you that astrology shouldn't turn your path or make the decisions for you ☺ personally id suggest asking your guides and focusing on your intuition. If you have doubts or are in a bad spot id say focus on your life's state and health lovely! 💖 But I know people have different beliefs so I definitely don't mind looking at your chart some!

But since we are focusing on this question I must ask if I have your permission to see your solar return chart for this year and next year? 🤔 that will give me more outlook on your career potential 🫂💖

Oh btw! Please block out any personally info! Just incase you forget 💖🥳🌈

[majicmarker]

so i’ve had a lot on my mind lately — the good, the bad, the ugly, you know the drill. i’m used to the bad and the ugly, but i think (and ofc by my therapist’s rec) i need to give a little credit to the good, too. not to mention the good is largely comprised of people, and those people deserve a sports stadium wave, yk? idk shit abt sports, whatever, but i know what the wave is and it’s like the grandest gesture i can think of, SO

listen, y’all. to get real here, i hate fandom. my time spent therein has been hit-or-miss, but the misses got me hard and contributed to some major self-loathing, etc etc. we’re not gonna get into the specifics, i don’t owe that to anyone, but suffice it to say things got Rough.

but so much of it can be so, so good. and rn i want to keep on my rose-colored glasses, and the rosiest parts for me have always been @kitten1618x and @mygutsforgarters

(quite a few others, too, but i no longer have everyone’s info. and some ppl are newer friends, or relationships that have moved more slowly. i have mad love for u guys too, obvs, but ik melissa and gus irl so we know each other More and they’re who this post is rly about atm. pls know i don’t want to harsh on anyone’s feelings)

the tl;dr version of events is i met them both via fanfic. i happened upon theirs like “bitch!!!! **i** wanna do this, they’re bomb as hell” and then i made them be friends w me. they’ll tell you they wanted to be friends w me first, but that’s not important bc **i** am the one making this post, so they can both like,, suck it.

ANYWAY.

@ melissa : so bitch listen. here’s the thing abt melissa…… i found her while browsing jonsa fic back when i cared abt GOT, and she brought me back to what i loved so much abt romance when i first started, way back in junior high, what’s up. i bad a fascination w historial romantic epics for a loooooong time — those formative yrs, amirite ladies??? — but girl i could never write it so well as melissa. immediately she struck this balance between the drama you expect from historicals and the levity of a good romance, and i was just like, “hand to god this woman must be published already, surely???”

(she’s not, but that’s ridiculous so we’re gonna skip that)

(also she’s busy?? we’ve been friends for like six years and i will never know how many kids she actually has, but the point is she’s a goddamn superhero and i’m obsessed w her, MOVING ON)

i just Had to be her friend for two reasons: 1) she’s too talented, and b) i have said that abt 2 ppl my entire life and she was the first, so i was like, “AH YES MY HOLY GRAIL”

so ofc i slid into her DMs just as effectively as that one guy i had a crush on when i was sixteen and he’s still shooting me texts every valentine’s day bc of the societal pressures i guess (it is Far Less Effective these days, he’s my age and therefore too young for me, gross, but i digress), except me and melissa go way stronger.

she reminded me of why, half a lifetime ago, i started writing romance — bc it’s fun, bc i want to. bc i can do absolutely anything i want, bc who else is gonna read it but me and whoever i share it with? it was all up to me what i wanted to do with it, and i could do anything. nothing really mattered but what i wanted, and i hadn’t felt that way abt anything in such a long time — let alone abt something i used to love so much.

melissa’s writing is so beautiful, it’s everything i wanted to achieve when i was fifteen and never got around to perfecting. and i’m totally okay w that now, bc what do i need to do myself that she’s not already doing/wants to do in the future? when i found melissa’s writing i found a missing part of me — a part i’d maybe lost, maybe i gave it up, idk, but it was totally gone until i found her fics and they fucking clicked. i had to reach out bc there was a part of me that was a part of her, and she helped me find that again w/o even knowing it.

so i found melissa via GOT, and from the start she’d been trying to get me to write some bethyl. years and years, she dropped not-so-subtle hints — and by “hints,” i mean legit directives that i watch just enough TWD to write her some beth/daryl fic. real crafty, she is.

eventually the stars aligned: i was bored w the same dynamics i’d been writing for years, i wanted smthn new, i was restless, i was line editing a bethyl fic she’d written, and — again — this shit clicked. her fic made me want to explore this dynamic i’d never done before, so i watched the prerequisite episodes (no more than that tho, i super hate the show and i’m begging y’all to not @ me abt it anymore). i found smthn that i’d been missing, smthn that challenged and excited me and brought me back around to why i love romance and, more importantly, why i want to write it myself.

so as i was starting to write bethyl, i was poking around the ao3 tag to get a feel for what had been done, what hadn’t, anything i might be missing. and goddamn BAM —

@ gus : this is where u enter dramatically thru a red velvet curtain that i don’t wanna touch (Metaphorically bc you do romance better than me and i’m cool w that bc your talent simply Cannot be touched, and Literally bc i hate velvet) — i was like, “please for the love of god let her want to write contemporary romance, i need some good fckin food”

i happened upon “doo wah diddy diddy” first. ofc the summary hooked me, forget my usual hard no against pregnancy fics (i have issues w pregnancy and that’s all anybody Needs to know, back off), but This Bitch !!!!!!! has a way with words and i wanted to be friends w her straightaway. lmao too bad for her, now she’s stuck w me

gus’s fics gave me what i wanted without having to write it myself. her style is so distinctive, she hits the notes between porn and Actual Affection that is missing from uhhhh, every romance i’ve tried?? (why is everyone so intent on the sex part?? fckin chill. at best it’s unrelatable and at worst u sound like u’d rather wear someone than fuck them, check urself)

she writes w such care, she wants you to know what she’s doing here, and what she’s doing here is combining the physical and emotional needs of both characters w/o infringing on anyone’s comfortability. you root for these characters bc they simply want to be together, no strings (and if there are strings, damn, they talk abt it).

gus makes you believe in love in the modern age. like, not to sound like one of those ppl who post fckin “no one in this generation knows how to love!!!1!!11!!” memes on facebook, those are dumb, but gus’s writing made me think “yeah man, love ain’t dead, it’s just abt how we approach it.”

(if y’all haven’t guessed yet, i have some hang-ups abt relationships. i’ve goddamn earned those. but melissa and gus both brought me back to where i needed to be — in this place where, yeah, we’ve got some shit to deal with, but we all still deserve the things we want, and those things are achievable. i could not have gotten here without them, so jot that down.)

gus is Real, she’s funny, she’s unapologetic in the way she writes. ofc she has her personal hurdles, but who doesn’t?? and tbh nobody writes a sex scene like gus does. physical, realistic, but balanced w the emotional depth that makes you root for these characters bc you can Feel how much they want each other — not just sexually, but in the less-erotic aftermath of that passion. it continues to blow my mind, bc i’ve never seen anyone do what she does. i can’t even pinpoint the specifics, bc she just… Does It. and you’re reading it like “yeah bitch that’s it,” and That’s It.

it’s fckin wild.

these two — my best friends, the lights of my life, both of whom always make me crave chicken tenders at THE most inconvenient hours bc somehow we always talk abt chicken or ice cream or ultimately DQ, but they're both so hot idec — have something special.

i really, really want them both to know that: it’s not just in how they’ve treated me as a friend, but who they are as people, in their creative pursuits. i’ve never known support the way they’ve shown me; i’ve never known this much enthusiasm or investment or belief that i can do what i want with my talent. i want them to know that i feel the same way abt them and their works.

sometimes, when i look back at their writing that completely kicked my ass, i still can’t believe that they’ve become two of my best friends. it’s totally bonkers. they’re This Talented, and they wanna be friends w my spastic ass? GIRL. i’m out.

i’m not always the best at being present, at giving people what they need when they need it. but with everything that melissa and gus have given me in the past few years, i need them to know this — honey!!! i need all y’all to know this, bc i know fandom shit is hard, but you should know some of these friendships are so, so worth all that bullshit, so —

they have so much to give, so much to say, so much to offer. i could not have kept going without them. i couldn’t believe in myself without the faith they’ve given to me. i hope that i can always give that same faith right back.

and that, babes, is what real soulmates are all about.

[neoncat666]

Reminder: I love you and you are the best. I love your babysitter! Sapnap au. Thank you for the free serotonin. Spare me a little more about your aus or the au 👉👈

I had to get onto my laptop for this So I don’t make all the aus myself so under the read more ill have name of the au then names of who worked on it (both of my friends are only on twitter)

Also if you want more info on a specific au feel free to send another ask about that au on anything you wanna know cause i just ramble unless i have a certain thing to go off of

Babysitter au - Blurry, Tal, and I Sapnap is a highschooler who needed a job that worked with his school schedule and honestly didn’t require a lot of work. He finds an ad by a single father to babysit his two sons, both 8 years old at the time. This is how he starts babysitting Tubbo and Tommy. He doesn’t really like get attached to them at first but after a bit of babysitting them and actually hanging out and learning about the kids, he finds himself actually enjoying his job and is always really excited for it out of school. I can do a post on everyone’s role in this au but there’s just.. so many. Think dreamsmp amount of people. There’s a lot. The main people tho are Sapnap, Tubbo, and Tommy though. Also Fundy is a piano teacher

Zombie apoc au - Blurry, Tal, and I Self explainatory except we said fuck usual main protag rights and it follows Sapnap, Tubbo, and Tommy again. Basically they’re all their actual ages and have to make it through the world. Sapnap ends up taking a really protective big brother role and it’s mostly just their adventures until they find other survivors. This au does kinda stand on the edge of what’s kinda ok so we’re lowkey making it not as bad cause in the end these are real people.

Clay friends au (storebought friends are fine) - Tal, Blurry, and I Sapnap is a college student who has trouble making friends and generally be social. He ends up messing around and makes these little clay figures which end up coming to life. They become his best friends and help him do stuff like cheat on tests, talk to other people, ect. Eventually Sapnap ends up making real life friends and doesn’t need the clay figures that maybe were a part of his imagination the whole time. Well Dream and George don’t really like being shoved into a bag to never be seen again. Yeah this ended up as a horror au

Flipside au - Tal and I Dream, Sapnap, and George are all irl friends who go to school together. One day they each find themselves in a completely new dimension that seems to be everything they could possibly ask for. The only way they can communicate with each other is a handheld mirror they all have. This mirror and bracelets they made as a symbol of their friendship is important. Well the dimensions end up shifting, changing into each person’s nightmare. It turns out these dimensions are actually alive and feed off the desperation and despair of others, I can go more in depth about this au if asked cause it’s genuinely one of our more complex aus

Brothers au - Tal! and I So Tubbo and Eret are brothers and when Tubbo was a tiny baby, a witch had tried to curse him but Eret ended up taking the attack instead. This ended up with Eret leaving Tubbo when he was young and Tubbo growing up to become a farmer. Years later there is talk of an evil king who is threatening to take over lands and resides in a castle not to far from where Tubbo lives. He signs up to be apart of the soldiers that are storming this castle to take down this king. Tubbo ends up being the only one to even make it to the ruler and is praised by this person for making it this far. The lighting only allowing Tubbo to see the glowing white eyes of this person, they end up fighting with the king using powers to throw chunks of earth at them. During the battle, the stained glass behind the throne shatters which allows light to enter the room and show the face of this evil queen. Tubbo feels like this person is familiar and ends up calling out for their brother. Eret, taken aback, kicks Tubbo out of her castle and moves his entire base far away as an attempt to get away from them. Tubbo, not one to give up, now finds himself on a quest to get their brother back and makes friends along the way.

Angels n Demons au - Me! Sapnap and Eret are angels while Bad (and maybe someone else) is a demon. This is honestly just me fucking around with the concept of angels and demons and I’ve only developed it slightly by yelling at my partner about it. I’m writing something about it rn but i’m always open to talking about it in asks and stuff like that lmao.

But yeah those are the aus ive worked/working on! My fav is maybe like... babysitter and brothers au but im biased on found family. Please talk to me about them i’ll tag each post with the au tag so we can get that shit organized!