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dari-ede · 2 years ago

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In the Middle of the Night: Chapter 20(M)

Chapter 20: "좀 급하지만 네 마음속에 이미 꽉 찬"

Chapters: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 - 18 - 19 - 20 - 21 - 22 - 23 - 24 - 25 - 26 - 27 - 28 - 29 - 30

MASTERLIST

Summary: As Bangtan prepares for a new chapter in their lives, they head to their private property in the forest for a songwriting workshop. As a songwriter and producer they have worked with for years, I’m asked to tag along. I was ready for the heavy workload and small amount of sleep during the workshop week. However, I wasn’t ready for the storm that came that changed my friendship with Namjoon forever.

Pairing: Idol!RM/Namjoon x OFC

Genre: Friends to Lovers, Fluff and Smut

Rating: M

Status: COMPLETE

[AN: A lot of things happen in this chapter. It all takes place in a matter of days, which is why the chapter is so long. We are getting near the end, and this chapter is one of the last ones before things take a turn]

Trigger warning: description—not too graphic—of sexual assault, talk of trauma. If you want to skip the portion, there will be **** symbols at the beginning and end of it.

warnings/spoilers: oral sex (male and female receiving), deep throat, gagging

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

November 2021

Malibu, CA, USA

I made my way through my family’s ranch. Seeing the horses brought a warmth I had been feeling seldom lately. My childhood horse passed many years ago. I hadn’t ridden much since, feeling it would be a betrayal. However, every time I saw one of those divine creatures, the emotions Selena—my horse—used to bring me always came flooding back. I loved this property. Loved the goats, the donkeys, the chickens, and the turkeys. It brought me solace from the shithole house I lived in. My parents’ house was huge, but there was no corner that could hide me from the black cloud that hovered. The hatred that plagued that house since before I was born still remained. As I came to the front door, my stomach turned. Emotions from childhood began to creep their way to the surface.

I had been in LA for over a week and I still hadn’t seen my parents. I had made every excuse in the book not to visit, but finally, I ran out of shit excuses to avoid them. Thankfully, I was planning on staying for only a couple of hours. I had already made Ky promise to call me to give me an excuse to leave. Plus, there was my Tia Jia who had agreed to come over as well, so that would help.

Taking a breath, I settled myself and knocked on the door.

A brunette, petite woman who looked like a retired model answered. Her hair and makeup were perfectly applied; the clothes on her making her glow like a goddess. My mother really was a beauty….

Her brown eyes did a once-over on me. “You haven’t been exercising while you’ve been gone? Mayahuel, you know noodles always make your face plump.”

…too bad her soul was rotten. “Hello to you too, Madre.”

She dismissed me and barely grazed my body with her arms—her version of a hug. More criticism came out of her mouth as she led the way into the house.

I noticed my father—tall, dark, and with the world’s thickest mustache—sitting on his normal chair in the corner of the living room. He was reading one of his many magazines. He barely looked up at seeing me and sent me a nod. Nice to see you too, Dad, I said silently to myself.

When we got to the kitchen, she went directly to the coffee. It was one of the few things I agreed wholeheartedly with my mother: coffee was good at any time of the day. She took out two cups and poured them to the rim. She put creamer in one and was about to put some in the other one when I stopped her, reminding her that I took mine with sugar only.

My mother gave a dismissive wave. “I always confuse you with your brothers.”

I really wanted to respond with the fact that one of my brothers didn’t like coffee and the other drank it straight black—no creamer or sugar. I was only going to be here for a couple of hours, though. I really didn’t want to spend it picking fights.

“So, I hear that you’ve been meeting up with some labels during your stay here,” my mother said bluntly.

I just about spat out my coffee. “Who told you?”

My mother looked unimpressed, almost offended. “You do realize that I’ve been in this industry for decades before you. I may no longer be a recording artist, but I am a songwriter and producer—I have ears almost everywhere.”

Of course I knew, but I didn’t think that word would get to her so quickly. I took another sip of coffee, wishing there was some kalua in it. “I’ve met with a couple already.”

“How have they gone?”

Horribly, I want to say, but I won’t. It’s my pride. I don’t want to admit that I—a platinum-selling, record-breaking, multi-winning recording artist—had just been offered two very shit deals. Honestly, I didn’t even want to think about their offers; it felt like a slap in the face.

Kyung had laughed in their faces, believing at first it was a joke, but when he saw they were serious, he hadn’t been interested in continuing the meetings—both times. We were in and out of that building in less than twenty minutes. The first time had felt bizarre, but this second one we had the other day went similarly and gave me self-doubt. Had I put too much value on myself?

Before I had a chance to answer my mother, we heard a voice coming from the front door.

As we turned towards the hall entrance, I was welcomed by a Korean woman making her way toward us. She was of medium height, slightly heavy, and had the warmest smile. Every time I saw it, I felt an ease run through me.

Tia Jia immediately hugged and kissed me. This was the ninth time we had seen each other since I had arrived, but I wasn’t about to tell my mother that.

“You come in right on time,” my mother said, grabbing another mug. “Mayahuel was about to tell us how these meetings have gone with some labels.”

Tia Jia gave a blank smile. I fought back a laugh. Truth was, my Tia Jia already knew everything. I had called her no more than ten minutes after walking out of each meeting. But, again, I wasn’t about to tell my mother that.

My mother continued to talk. “If they aren’t able to meet your list of demands, just know your old label would meet every one of them. I talked to Chad not so long ago and he said—”

“You what?” I asked. Hearing the name made my stomach drop.

“I talked to Chad—” My mother continued.

“Why?” Anger began to rumble. I had told my mother long ago that I had gotten into an argument with one of the heads, which was the reason why I had left. She had been badgering me so much about why I had decided not to resign from my contract, that I felt pressured to tell her something. Mostly, because I believed she would have started snooping around if I didn’t give her something.

“Oh, it’s not that big of a deal, Mayahuel. Let bygones be bygones,” she said dismissively. “You never were one to have the patience for a few disagreements.”

No, I just wasn’t one who had the patience for the screaming, yelling, name-calling, and throwing objects, I wanted to say to her. But I kept on topic. “Madre, I told you that this wasn’t some small argument. This was serious. I was disrespected and there is no way in hell that I’m going to ever work with them again.”

Before my mother could let out another word, my tia Jia interceded. She settled my mother down. She had dealt with the woman for almost all her life—they had been best friends since they were teenage girls. No one seemed to settle my mother better than my tia Jia.

Thankfully, my mother agreed to change the topic.

I gave my tia a look of complete gratefulness.

“Have you told your mother about Thanksgiving?” Tia Jia asked.

My mother’s face did not look pleased. “What about it?”

I decided to just rip the Band-Aid. “Well, I wanted to have it over my place. My friends from Korea are going to be here for their concert and I wanted to invite them. They’ve been great with me while I’ve been living there—especially Namjoon. He always had me over during a holiday. His entire family was always welcoming.”

“Namjoon is a good man,” Tia Jia said warmly. “You’ve met him before, Tlali. He’s the tall one. Incredibly smart—very handsome.”

“Who?” my mother looked utterly lost.

“From the group of friends Mayita has. The Korean group.”

It took a while for my mother to figure it out. “Oh. They’re all tall.”

“Well, he’s the tallest,” I said. “And I’m going to invite them for Thanksgiving. I figured it would be nice to do something for them. I would like all my loved ones in one room.”

My mother didn’t say anything, just wore a slight frown and looked out into the distance. It was the look I knew all too well: she was trying to be polite and not say anything rude.

The unsettling feeling in my stomach I usually felt when I knew my mother was judging me immediately took over. Honestly, sometimes I preferred hearing her be rude than imagining what she might be thinking.

“It’s going to be fun,” Tia Jia insisted, her voice upbeat and light. “Do you want to make the menu right now? We have time.”

Tia Jia’s excitement rubbed off. I took out my phone and the pair of us began to look up dishes.

“Want some more, honey?” my tia Jia asked, motioning to my empty mug.

I nodded.

She took it and poured some coffee, adding two tablespoons of sugar and handing it to me.

As I took a sip of the coffee, I noticed my mother's demeanor change. I know she had noticed it. Tia Jia knew my preference for coffee. A small part of me felt bad….

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A few days later, I walked out of my third meeting with label. And for the third time, I was walking away feeling completely off. Enough so that I knew it wasn’t something I could ignore anymore. My intuition was screaming at me that something was going on.

Kyung was walking with me, getting into the driver’s side as I got into the passenger’s side. Once both inside, I let it out. “What the fuck is going on?”

Kyung drove out of the parking spot. He was silent until we were out of the lot. “I was really hoping it was just me or that the other two labels were just being dickheads for other reasons. But now….” He shook his head in disgust.

I finished his thinking. “It’s like they’re offering me a shitty contract on purpose so I won’t sign with them. That deal is something you offer a rookie who doesn’t know the first thing about the industry. They might as well spit at me.” Anger was starting to boil inside me.

Kyong began to speak again, “I wasn’t lying to you when I said they were the ones who wanted you more than the other labels. I scheduled to meet them third on purpose. I wanted to see what the other two companies were offering so we could work that to our advantage. But it seems as if the offers are getting worse.” He looked more pissed than how he sounded.

I had known Kyung all my life. Before he was my manager and business partner, he had been an important figure growing up. As much as Tia Jia was like a mother to me, Kyung was like a brother. From his facial expressions, I knew when he was controlling his anger. “What’s up?”

It took a moment. He was trying to gather his thoughts and emotions before speaking up. “A buddy of mine who still works at the old label tipped me off the other day. Some rumor he had heard from top executives. Apparently, some didn’t take well with you rejecting to meet with them. We shouldn’t be surprised that they heard of us meeting with other companies for possible contracts—it’s hard to keep a secret in this industry. According to my buddy, the execs in the old label are trying to block you from signing.”

Suddenly, I remembered my mother’s words about talking to Chad. Had she known about my meetings with other labels before talking to Chad? Had she told Chad? Had Chad tried using my mother to get to me—to get me to come crawling to them? Fuck, he probably did.

Kyung’s eyes were on the road; he couldn’t see how upset I was. “I knew they weren’t going to be happy about us rejecting their meeting, but to go this far? Maybe I should give them a call and try to settle things with them.”

“No,” I said as I turned away so he wouldn’t see how pissed I was at this suggestion.

I knew he was looking at me. “Why?”

“I don’t want anything to do with them, Kyung. I’ve said this too many times.” I was getting snappy and I didn’t want to.

Kyung wasn’t one to easily let things go, though. “Maya, I really don’t know why you can’t give me an answer. What happened? I know something did—I thought maybe it was with one individual in the company you had an issue with, but now it seems as if it’s the entire company that fucked you over.”

I refused to tell him. For too many reasons, he couldn’t know. I had told two people about the incident—my tia Jia and Dr. Rob. I don’t think I could ever tell another soul.

Kyung let out a heavy sigh. “It must be bad if you can’t even tell me. It only makes me think the worse, you know? You tell me almost everything. How bad is it that you can’t tell me?”

I stayed silent.

Then, I noticed us pulling into a parking lot. It was mostly empty. I turned to Kyung, confused about why we were here.

He parked the car, unbuckled himself, and fully turned to me. His face was a pale white, his hands and lips were shaking slightly. I had never seen him look like this. “It’s scaring me, Maya. I’m thinking the unimaginable here.” His eyes were watery and desperate. “Please don’t tell me it’s what I think it is.”

My own eyes were starting to form tears of their own. Horrible images creeping their way up. I fought to keep control.

“Did someone…do something to you?” he was struggling getting the words out. The tears were coming down.

I couldn’t hold it together anymore. Seeing him come apart sent me downward. I felt myself shaking, feeling the anger, the disgust, the hurt, and the embarrassment all at once.

His arms were around me, pulling me into a warm embrace. I clutched to him, letting myself feel it all as those goddamn images came flooding back to the surface.

**He squeezed. As if he had done it before. As if it belonged to him.

There was an eerie glint in his eyes. The clear-blue eyes that I once thought to be full of kindness were now baring down at me in a vile way.

My skin crawled and I wanted nothing more than to push him off and run out of there. But for the first time in my life, I had no control of my body. With a simple claw on my body, this piece of shit had overpowered me.

Hot breath was on me and I wanted to be stabbed, just so I could feel something else.**

“You don’t have to talk about it.” Kyung’s voice pulled me out of my horrific past. “We won’t ever deal with them, I promise. But know I’m here for whenever you want to talk, ok?”

I only nodded, not trusting my voice.

He kissed the top of my head. “If you’re scared of how I’ll react, I swear on Yori and my kids I won’t say a thing to the guys. I promise.”

It was one of the reasons I didn’t want him to know the truth. Kyung was close with my brothers and guy cousins. We had all grown up together and the guys had an old school mentality when it came to handling certain things. I still remember the hell they gave my first ex who treated me like shit. The piece of shit who assaulted me had done worse. I had enough reason to suspect that this could lead to legal trouble for the guys if they found out.

Then, there was the added layer of them be disappointed in me. Growing up, they had taught me how to defend myself. Taught me what to do if anyone dared put his hands on me. I knew how to box, for crying out loud. How had I just let it happen? Their disappointment in me would only deepen the disappointment I had on myself.

Dr. Rob had emphasized time and time again that it wasn’t my fault. Shock was common in assault victims. However, I had never accepted that in myself.

Once out of his embrace, he smiled sweetly. “Eomma knows?”

I nodded.

“Good. As long as she knows, it’s all that matters,” he said with complete sincerity. He continued to soothe me until I was calm and no more tears were coming down. “You good?”

I nodded. “Yeah. Thank you.”

He held my eyes as he spoke, “You call the shots, Maya. You always have. I’ll find you the perfect home, I promise. And then you’re gonna kick ass, record the most amazing album, win a shit ton of awards, and break multiple records. Those sons of bitches are going to regret it.”

The fire in his eyes and voice gave me some power.

“Hell, even if we can’t find the perfect home, you can still record and release this album without backup. And I’ll be sure to spread the word that you released it on your own because no label took you seriously. They’ll be walking with their tail between their legs from the embarrassment.”

I felt a boost of confidence, Kyung’s words affecting me in a positive way.

He was right, we were going to use this as fuel. We’d make them all regret it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next day, things began to look up. Bangtan had landed in LA. Because I had a close relationship with the coordinator of the trip, I managed to sneak my way into the vehicle Namjoon was going to be riding in. I had made it seem as if I was doing a prank on him that the rest of the guys were in on.

It worked and I was currently in the back seat of the black van. The van was parked in a section inside LAX that had a private exit. I had told the coordinator and guys about the exit.

The partition on the vehicle was up, so we would have privacy.

Namjoon was the first to enter the vehicle. Those dark brown, dragon eyes were the first thing I saw. He had his mask on, so I couldn’t see his deep dimples. I felt like I was six years old seeing Disneyworld for the first time.

He made his way to the back of the van, pulled down his mask, and leaned his entire body into me. His lips immediately sought my own. His baseball cap bumped into me, so I took it off.

I enthusiastically welcomed him, throwing the cap to the side, and wrapping my arms around his wide back. “Hi,” I mumbled in between kisses. “How was the flight?”

“Long,” he mumbled back, his lips not wanting to leave mine as well.

“Get a room!” came Jimin’s voice.

Namjoon pulled away at the reminder we weren’t alone. He let out an irritated sigh and sat down properly. His arm came around the back of my seat.

I took his seatbelt and buckled him in, noticing he had forgotten to do so. “It’s a good thing you guys were able to use this terminal.” I reached over to Jimin and pinched his cheeks in a greeting fashion. He gave me one of his eye smiles.

“It’s a good thing you told the team about it,” J-Hope said as he buckled himself into his seat. “If you hadn’t mentioned it, we would have gone through the main terminal.” He reached over and gave me a high five.

“I thought I had told you guys about it before. It’s a major benefit after flying private all my life, I got to learn all the hacks of LAX,” I said as the door closed.

I turned back to Namjoon who was looking fondly at me. My cheeks were starting to hurt from all the smiling. I fell into my seat, his arm circling my shoulders. “I missed you,” I whispered to him, letting out what I had been feeling since leaving his apartment in Seoul.

His face inched closer to mine, his hand caressing my neck and pulling my face to his. “I missed you, too.” With his forehead against mine, he closed his eyes and breathed in. He looked calm, at ease.

I reached up to touch his face and noticed a change. His strips were gone. He had gotten a new cut and the strips had faded. While I had enjoyed the strips along his hair, he hadn’t been a fan of them. He tended to prefer a mullet style—which, personally, was my least favorite on him. But it was his hair, and I really didn’t care too much how he styled or cut it. As long as I had hair to pull and hold on to…..

The sudden image of his mouth wrapped around my pussy and his tongue inside me came to mind. I tried to shake it off. It hadn’t been two weeks since the last time we slept together and already I was horny. I blamed him. If he wasn’t so great, I wouldn’t crave him so much.

“I wouldn’t get too attached to it,” he warned as I stroked his hair.

Instantly, I hoped he didn’t mean he was going to dye it again. It really was the only thing that slightly bothered me. The constant dyeing and bleaching worried me. “Are you getting another haircut?” I asked, hopeful.

“No, I’m bleaching it again,” he said cautiously.

I must have made a face.

“You say I look good blond,” he said immediately as if he was trying to ease my worry.

He really did good as a blond, but I doubted his scalp felt it was worth it.

“I promise to keep away from the mullet,” he offered like a negotiation—like I wouldn’t let him. “And it won’t be toobleached.”

I really didn’t want to make this a big deal. It was his goddamn hair. And he was a grown adult. No one in the company bullied him into doing anything he really didn’t want to do. That was years in the past. I really shouldn’t be a Debbie Downer about this.

I shook my head at myself. “Namjoon, I’m not your mother. It’s your hair. It’s up to you what you want to do with it.”

“Yeah, but you’re my girl. You’re gonna be the one mostly looking at it.”

I smiled at his title for me. I had missed it. And, honestly, it’s all I needed to make me stop worrying about his hair. I took ahold of his shirt and tugged at it, pulling his beauty closer. “Handsome, I mostly look at your gorgeous face. The hair is just there for me to pull at.”

He let out a low moan and filled the gap between us, kissing me open-mouthed.

Nothing but fake gags could be heard in the vehicle.

I pulled away from Namjoon, settling in my seat. “Anything I missed since I last saw you?”

“Just a bit of a mess with Jungkook and Yuna,” Jimin said, a mischievous look on his face.

“What happened?” I asked, fully absorbed in the gossip.

Hoseok went on to explain the mess the youngest member had recently gotten into that involved his girlfriend. It hadn’t been pleasant but thankfully had been cleaned up. The news outlets didn’t get wind of it, thankfully.

By the sounds of it, it seemed as if there was trouble in paradise with the young couple.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After a nice visit to LACMA, Namjoon and I arrived at my house with Kogi. We had eaten some of the tacos on the drive with Namjoon feeding me. The original idea had been to eat once getting to my house, but the smell had been too intoxicating. It was one of my favorite places to eat in LA and hadn’t had it in years. Initially, Namjoon didn’t deem it safe enough for me to eat while driving. I tried using logic, reminding him how good of a driver I was—I had been taught how to drive by my brother and cousins who were drag racers. When that didn’t work, I pouted. And finally, I got my first bite. At seeing my happy wiggle, he kept feeding me. I made a mental note about this—now I knew what would work later for my benefit.

We spoke a little about the crappy offers by the labels, Namjoon also believed there was something fishy going on.

"Haven't you mentioned before that your mother knows a lot of people?" he asked. "Why not see if she can snoop around to see what she can find?"

My stomach churned at the thought.

I didn't have to say anything for Namjoon to understand my physical response. I think he could even hear how upset my stomach was. "Is it really that difficult asking her for a favor? She's your mother, Maya."

Namjoon always wanted to see the best in people, but he had been blessed with amazing parents. He had never known what it felt like to be neglected—and I was grateful for that ignorance. "I trusted my mother a long time ago. More times than I can count. And she always manages to let me down. Do you know what that feels like? At age 2, 8, 14, 23 to trust another person enough with your emotions only for them to spit at them? I tell my mother I have a feeling that someone at my own old company is trying to sabotage me and she'll openly laugh at me—she's done it before on multiple occasions. I lost count of the number of times when she has said, word for word, 'no one cares about your feelings.'"

When I first started therapy, it had been difficult to admit these feelings I had about my mother—I could never get through it without crying. Now, it was easier. But it still cut deep.

"I'm sorry," Namjoon said gently, his hand soothing me.

I took a breath. "It's easy to let people in. But thanks to my parents' shitty job, it's hard to let someone back in. And I hit my limit with my parents. I can't anymore with them."

We finally arrived at my home. In silence, we got out of the vehicle once we were parked in the garage.

Namjoon grabbed his overnight bag and the bags of take-out and followed me into the home.

As I led us through the hall, I thought of the other guys. Namjoon and I decided to spend the day together visiting different spots in the LA area, the other guys were off doing their own thing, but I didn’t know what. As soon as I picked up Namjoon, I had forgotten to ask about the guys.

“What are the rest of the others doing today?” I asked, setting down the bag of leftovers on the kitchen island. I had eaten three tacos on the drive here, but I was still craving more.

Namjoon opened the containers; he was always down for eating. “Jin and Yoongi stayed at the hotel. The rest went to the Harry Styles concert. Tae’s the most excited. He’s been wanting to see him for a while.”

“That’s tonight?” I asked. The days sure were passing fast.

“Yeah. They might already be there.”

“That’s gonna be fun for them. Two years of being so cooped up, they deserve to have fun.”

Namjoon and I picked up the rest of the dishes we had bought. We had bought almost every item on the menu due to our indecisive.

As we ate, Namjoon went over one of the artists we had observed today at LACMA. I sat back, enjoying hearing him talk. He leaned over to my dish, which was across the table, and took a fork full of food. As he reached, his glasses slid down his nose a little. He pushed them back up. He in glasses was definitely one of my favorite looks on him.

He looked up at me, catching me. “What?”

I simply smiled and leaned into him. “Have I told you today that you’re pretty hot?”

“That’s out of nowhere.” He gave a shy smile but still filled the gap to capture my lips.

“I’m finding your bookworm look pretty damn sexy. You sit there with your hoodie, Timberlands, baseball cap, prescribed glasses, and talk about books and art—it’s a total turn-on.” My upper body was now fully on the counter, being pulled to his gravity.

There was a glint in his eye that looked a little mischievous. “Is it a fantasy of yours—doing it with a bookworm?”

The image made my pussy drip. “I can totally picture riding your face with those glasses on. They’ll be fogged and juiced up by the end of the night.”

Those dragon eyes came swam to the surface, making my skin burn. “You think it’s going to take me all night to get them foggy and juicy? Baby, I’ll have you cuming in less than 10 minutes.”

My cunt squeezed at the promise. It’d been two weeks since the last time we had had sex. But it honestly felt like two years.

Without another word, he walked around the counter, took my hand, and led me into the hall. “Where’s the master bedroom?” he asked, his voice tight and controlled.

“Double doors at the end of the hall,” I answered excitedly.

The moment we entered our destination, his lips were on mine, his tongue slipping in.

He was true to his word; no more than seven minutes later, I fell apart. My knees clenched around Namjoon’s head, my thighs holding his face captive around my center. His glasses were wrecked and soaking wet. His face was flushed and glistering with my juices. A laugh escaped me at the sight of him.

“I told you I was going to break them,” I let out as I pulled off his cracked specs and put them on the nightstand before his eyes could get damaged.

“And I told you it wouldn’t take me all night,” he countered. He leaned in and kissed my inner thigh.

I let out a giggle, pulling myself off him.

He rolled to his side and took me in his arms, his lips searching mine.

We stayed like that for a moment, with simple touches, and kisses until I regained my strength.

And then my hunger for him began to surface. I needed more. I needed him.

I found myself pushing him onto his back while I made my way down his massive physique. My hands tugged at his clothing while I gave attention to every piece of skin I could reach. I don’t think I had ever been so obsessed over a man’s body as I was with this divine creature before me. There wasn’t an inch of him that wasn’t glorious.

My mouth salivated at the sight of his cock waving in the air, dying for attention.

My hands and mouth wasted no time. My lips kissed the long vein on the underside of his shaft, holding eye contact with him the entire time. Once at the head, I wrapped both lips around it and sucked a little. My hand went up and down his thick girth. I let spit fall down his cock, which allowed my hand to work him with a better grip.

“Fuuuuuuuck, baby.” His hand twitched towards me, making a gesture towards my head, but held my cheek instead.

I pulled off his dick with a nice popping sound, liquid coming down the corners of my mouth. I stroked him as I asked him something I had been wanting to know since the first time I gave him head. “Do you want to fuck my mouth?”

His brown eyes went wide and his hand froze on my cheek.

I laughed darkly and I sank my head back down, not stopping until the head hit the back of my throat. I then quickly came back up and stroked him at a higher speed. “We have a safe signal. If it gets to be too much, I’ll let you know.”

He finally spoke up. “Are you sure?” he asked in the middle of a moan.

I nodded eagerly. “I really want to.” I twisted my wrist.

He let out a groan. “I want you to be sure,” he said gruffly.

“I trust you,” I said as my eyes looked directly at him.

His eyes turned soft for a moment and then the dragon eyes took over.

I maneuvered my way to the side of the bed and climbed off. I took Namjoon’s hand and tugged at it, signaling him to move towards me. He did, finding a seat on the side of the bed as I came to the ground, kneeling before him. There was a fire radiating off of his eyes. He had yet to blink, it seemed.

Taking his cock member in my mouth, I worked a good rhythm. When he still hadn’t moved, I placed my hands on his thick hips and went further down, sending his dick deep into my throat.

He let out a groan and began to move his hips on his own.

It didn’t take long for the feeling of his head hit the back of my throat. My jaw opened wider and I moved a different angle, allowing more of him inside me. My throat muscles clenched around his girth, a gag naturally coming out.

“Shit,” he let out, his hands holding onto my head.

I moved my body so it could allow my throat more room. I took more of him down my throat. His length pushed through my pharynx.

“Oh shit,” he let out, his hips acting on their own accord and pressing further in me.

It was too much, so my throat tightened hard against him. I took a deep breath from my nose, trying to ensure I got enough oxygen. I wanted to come up for full air, but the desire to live out the fantasy of Namjoon face fucking me was too great.

I pulled out a little and went back in, letting him know what pace I was good with.

He took the hint and began to rock and hips in the same rhythm. With every thrust, he goes a little further in me.

Because of his long length, it took a while before his full cock engulfed my throat. His face appeared to be full of ecstasy. His body was sweating bullets.

I wanted to keep the rhythm going but noticed the vein in his throat. He was trying to control his orgasm.

After taking a few breaths, he started to rock himself again. He fully pulled out of me, allowing me to take a full breath of fresh air before he went back in. Keeping eye contact with me, he pushed back into my mouth.

He bottomed out a lot easier and quicker this time. His eyes never left my face, ensuring I was ok with this. Once he was satisfied and confident that I was comfortable, he allowed himself to be in the moment.

As he worked himself in my throat, my pussy craved attention. I brought my fingers to my core, giving myself pleasure.

Namjoon’s hips crashed a little harder against me, his fingers dug into my hair with a little more force. I let out a hum as he impaled me, wanting to heighten his pleasure.

He cursed again. His member almost fully exited my throat but plunged back into me with plenty of vigor. There was a pause, looking for my reaction before he reenacted the same move.

My gagging was getting louder, the saliva coming down my throat in buckets, and my pussy was creating a pool at my feet.

“You look so fucking hot right now,” he lets out, almost breathless. His eyes fall to my legs. “Speed up those fingers, baby. Don’t cum yet.”

I let out a mewl, as I usually do when I hear that commanding tone of his.

“Almost,” he lets out, his powerful thighs hitting my face. I didn’t care, though. The look on his face was well worth it. “I’m cuming,” he warned.

While he thrust a few more times, I pushed the tip of my tongue along the bottom of his length. With one more push, my nose was pressed against his stomach as his warm seed went down my throat.

There was so much coming out of him; more than any of our other times together. I swallowed as much as I could, but plenty managed to spill out. Slowly, I pulled out of him, making sure to give the tip of him one final peck.

He was sweating bullets and he took in deep breaths. He looked as if he had just come out of the gym.

I reached over to the side of the bed where I had a box of tissues. I cleaned the both of us up. Usually, it was Namjoon that took care of us, but he was still trying to catch his breath. Once we were cleaned, we made our way to the center of the bed, cuddling.

Normally, oral sex tended to be foreplay for us. But we were both exhausted. It had been a long day of physical activity—inside and outside of the bedroom

With his arm around me, I found myself falling into a sweet sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Apparently, we had been more exhausted than we realized. It was close to sundown when we realized how long we had slept. Knowing we would just continue to sleep if we stayed in bed, we forced ourselves out and decided to take a stroll along the beach. We needed physical activity to wake us up. Plus, the sunset setting would be a nice view for a picture I could take of Namjoon. My property was incredibly close to the beach and had a private entrance that no many used.

As we made our way down the path that led to the water, I kept an eye out for people, making sure we were alone before reaching out to take his hand in mine.

The move made him smile. “Have you talked to your parents?” he asked.

I imagine he was referring to Thanksgiving dinner. I knew he was excited to meet my family. “A little. I haven’t talked to my mother much—except for the other day that I met with her. I told her that I wanted to have Thanksgiving at my place.”

“What did she say?” he asked.

I shrugged. “Nothing, really. I’m not too sure she was happy at the idea of it being at my place. She likes to host. But Seb and Victor already agreed with my place. She also didn’t say anything about that. So, I’m taking silence as compliance. She was pretty non-verbal after that.”

Remembering the conversation just brought irritation. Why my mother could never act like an adult was beyond me. She dodged talking about issues and would later be passive-aggressive. I had been here for only a few weeks, but I already wanted to leave again.

Namjoon reached over to me and gave me a side hug, trying to soothe me.

I leaned into his embrace, allowing myself to relax at his touch. I had already vented to him about the meetings I had with the labels during our car ride. It really had been a long day.

We continued to walk down the path, hearing the ocean waves. We came apart once we were down in the sand. We took notice of a few people present. We kept a small distance between us but weren’t too far from each other.

We walked side by side along the shore, only saying a few words. Our focus was mostly on the scenery in front of us. As the sun set, I took full advantage and took several photos of Namjoon. He insisted on taking one together. I gave in and he handled the selfie.

There was no one present anymore, except for a couple off in the far distance. The sun was fully gone and now the moon was starting to shine. And the coast still looked just as gorgeous.

In the two years I had been gone, I had almost forgotten how beautiful it was. Although I had come to love Seoul, there was something about California that made it irreplaceable. The water, beach, sands, mountains, and coast couldn’t be matched. I had traveled the world and California was still among the most beautiful places.

“I can see why you chose this place,” Namjoon’s voice lingered in the chilly air. His face was turned towards the sea, watching the waves lightly crashing onto the shore.

My eyes stayed on his face, admiring how the moon’s light bounced on all the right angles. Shadows were created but only amplified his features. The wind moved through the water and his hair. It really looked like he belonged to the night.

I took it back, there was another beauty that took top tier.

“What?” he asked, catching me ogling at him.

There was zero embarrassments I felt. Without shame, I would openly gawk at his magnificence. “You’re so handsome,” I said dreamingly. “When moon rise, it’s your time to shine.”

He turned away, trying to hide his shy smile.

I let out a laugh. “So cute.” I poked his side.

His dimples deepened. I saw the glint in his eyes before he could make a move.

I was already planning on dodging him before he reached for me. But before he made a move, I noticed something from the corner of my eye. I turned my head and found a couple several yards away, walking towards us. They were both young Asian women.

My heard accelerated, frightened at being caught. I moved several feet away from Namjoon just as he made to reach me.

I turned my head away from the pair of eyes that were getting closer to us. I put some more distance between the two young women as they reached. We exchanged smiles, but I did my best to hide my face in the shadows. I hoped Namjoon did the same.

The two women walked between us and continued on their walk opposite us. They didn’t show any indication of knowing either one of us. Their faces and strides kept forward. Once they were far away, I fell into step with Namjoon. I let out a sigh, relieved we hadn’t been caught.

However, Namjoon stepped away from me. “No, maybe we should wait until we’re back at your place before you get too close. Wouldn’t want you to feel uncomfortable.” His voice was harsh and bitter.

I turned to him, confused. His eyes were knitted together, his chin set forward, and his jaw clenched. “What?”

“You must have jumped a good ten feet. Even with complete strangers, you don’t like the thought of anyone knowing we’re an item.” I could hear the hurt in his words, but his main emotion was annoyance.

I chose my words carefully and did my best to keep my voice steady and soft. “Namjoon, we do the same thing in Korea. On the rare times when we’re in public, we keep a good amount of distance between us. I didn’t jump away from you because I’m ashamed of you. I stepped away because I was worried they would recognize us.”

His facial features didn’t waiver. “We’re in America, I’m not as recognized here as I am in Korea. And just because they’re Asian doesn’t automatically mean they know me.”

There was an accusation in his statement that hinted at my being ignorant. It stung because he was right, I had made an assumption: they were Asian, so more than likely they knew about BTS. However, the harshness in his words made it seem as if my assumption was more sinister than naïveté.

I tried to mask the hurt. “Even you guys have mentioned whenever you’re in a foreign land that the ones who recognize you immediately are Asian. And I was only being careful. Especially after Jungkook’s close call. I apologize if it came off wrong; that wasn’t my intent.”

It was moments when we walked in silence, letting the incident hang in the air. Our thoughts played the scene over and over again and I was positive he was wondering the same as I: what would have been a better way of handling that situation?

The chill in the air started to physically affect me. I felt goosebumps along my arm and my body began to involuntarily shiver. No more than a few seconds later, I felt a heaviness around my shoulders, Namjoon’s scent hit me powerfully. He had taken off his hoodie for me.

“I’m sorry,” he said deeply. “I shouldn’t have said it that way. It’s a constant reminder that we can’t be ourselves whenever we want. Jungkook and Yuna did have a close call and it was a mess covering it up. Most of what I have, I’m grateful for. But every now and then I’m reminded of the negative attributes of being an idol.”

I could see and hear his own hurt. Even though I was well-known myself, my dating life was kept under the radar due to my own personal decisions. I was a private person who never confirmed or denied any of my relationships. But I never worried about any paparazzi taking pictures of me with my partner. If I was caught holding hands or kissing someone, I didn’t care. It didn’t affect my business. However, the same could not be said about Namjoon or any of the other guys. Our worlds, realities, and cultures differed in that aspect.

“I’m sorry,” I said softly to him, not knowing what else I could say.

He gave a small shrug. “It is what it is.”

I wanted nothing more than to stretch out my fingers to hold his hand. But we were still out in public. Several people were out that could still recognize us. I settled for taking a whiff of his sweater, making sure he saw me doing so.

The dimples on his face told me he understood me. He always understood me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I was the first to arrive on the red carpet before the guys, but eventually, they caught up to me.

Namjoon and I hadn’t seen each other beforehand. He had gotten ready at the hotel and I had gotten ready at home. However, we timed so we would arrive at the same time.

As I posed for photos, the guys made their way closer to me. Up at the very front of the line was a damn good-looking Kim Namjoon. He looked dashing in his grey suit and blond hair. As my eyes landed on his handsome facial features, I noticed his eyes roaming over my dress. It was a halter-top, flowy material that had a split along one of my legs. The split reached my upper thigh, almost my pelvic. It hugged and highlighted my best features: legs and chest. And the yellow material complimented my skin tone. I would be lying if I said I hadn’t kept Namjoon in mind while deciding on this outfit a while back ago.

Hearing my name being called out, I snapped me back to the present. I resumed posing and form the corner of my eye, I could see the guys starting to pose as well.

Once the round of photos had ended, I publicly greeted the guys at the first opportunity. We took a few photos together and continued on. Namjoon and I did our best to keep some distance between us.

While most of the time, I spent time doing solo interviews, there were multiple hosts who insisted on interviewing me with the guys. Many forgot we were friends and I had been living in Korea for the last two years. As soon as the media remembered, the guys and I were almost stuck at the hip for a handful of interviews.

As we were talking to one of the hosts, Hoseok had been asked a question. I tried to move back to allow Hoseok to get closer to the mic, but in so doing, I lost my footing. If I had been wearing normal shoes, I would have been able to balance, but I was wearing 5-inch heels. My arms shot up, trying to keep myself upright.

A warm set of hands caught me, keeping me from making a fool of myself in front of millions of people.

I looked up to find Namjoon’s hands on me. His instincts had kicked in. A look of worry on his face. “Are you hurt?” he asked with concern, keeping me steady, and searching me.

Other hands took my arm or held my back, ensuring I was safe.

I let out a nervous laugh. “That would have been embarrassing,” I said to the interviewer.

“Good thing these gentlemen were here to save you,” commented the interviewer. “Nice work, boys.”

“Thanks, guys,” I said. Hoseok and Jimin made sure I looked nice and steady before they let me go. Once they saw I was ok, they too let out a laugh.

“Wow,” said the interviewer. “They got really worried for you.”

Namjoon’s hands were still on me and the look of concern on his face still had not left.

He needed to stop—we were in public. There were dozens of cameras on us. I thought of something quickly to stop any fans and onlookers from reading too much into this. “They’re like my brothers, so they’re pretty protective. Very sweet.” I reached up and pinched Namjoon and Hobi’s cheeks.

Hobi giggled while Namjoon took his hands from me, getting the hint. Quickly, the conversation went elsewhere.

I hoped it worked.

The night continued without any other incident. I ended up winning the award I was up for. As I made my way up the stage with the singer I had created the song for, the guys stood up and cheered the loudest. It was very cute.

The guys went on to win plenty of awards themselves.

Finally, I was up for my least favorite part of the night: presenting.

Even though I was fine at meeting new people and thrived when I performed on stage, I always disliked getting in front of a group of strangers and presenting. While I knew most of the people in the audience, I wasn’t friends with them. They were colleagues and standing in front of all of them was not fun. It was anxiety really, just a dislike. And despite how much I hated it, goddamn Kim Taehyung managed to convince me to take this stupid job.

I was presenting the night’s most important category, which only made it more fun. Among the nominees were the guys which only added to the list of reasons why I didn’t want to do this.

Everyone in the industry knew I was close to them, so I was confident they would be winning. The night had been centered around them. They had won multiple times already. This would be the cherry on top of a record-breaking night for them. However, I was still hesitant to fully believe they would win.

After the last of the nominees had been announced, I got ready to announce the winner. “And the award goes to,” I tore open the paper and read the winner written on it. “BTS!” I cheered.

The fans went wild, of course.

All seven of them took a gracious bow and made their way over to the stage where I stood.

We were keeping social distancing for the awards, but I made sure to fist-bump every one of them at least. I'd hug them later when we were alone.

When I reached Namjoon, I could see him shaking with nerves. I took notice of how the others were wrapped around us, covering us from prying eyes and cameras. I took advantage of the window of opportunity. “Take a breath, baby,” I said under my breath so only he could hear.

His vision refocused as he looked at me. I gave him a smile and turned away.

I took my place off to the side, giving them center stage. Namjoon rubbed his hands together—a habit of his when he got too nervous or anxious—and took a breath as I had suggested, and made his way to the mic.

He stumbled his way into the half-remembered speech he had written and practiced numerous times. Even after all these years and the amount of success he had, he still got genuinely elated and surprised when they were rightly recognized. The beauty of his humbleness squeezed at my heart.

God, he was perfect. And damn me, because I was finding myself falling even deeper for him.

Chapters: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 - 18 - 19 - 20 - 21 - 22 - 23 - 24 - 25 - 26 - 27 - 28 - 29 - 30

MASTERLIST

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hobicomeholla29 · 5 years ago

Text

Room

Namjoon x reader

~°•☆•°~°•☆•°~°•☆•°~°•☆•°~°•☆•°~°•☆•°~°•☆•°~

*Jungkook passing by Namjoon's room in the dorms*

*Namjoon and y/n making out while standing*

Jungkook: Get a room!

Namjoon: *surprised that Jungkook saw them*

*realization hits*

Namjoon: I am in my room😎

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latina4bangtan · 6 years ago

Text

Let’s Make a Deal Pt. 2

Summary: (Y/N) has been told about the deal that her father has made but will she accept it after finding out the conditions....or even better who she will be making a deal with?

Warnings: Violence, Gang referenceS, Adult Language, eventual (m) rated chapters and I’ll add as I go if necessary

Genres: Angst, eventual smut & fluff

Word count: 1341

Namjoon x latina

Namjoon x reader

All you could do was sit there and try to think and process what had just been said.You had heard the word but no matter what you just couldn’t believe it.

Marriage.

How could they do this.

Minutes passed....maybe even hours...though at this second you didn’t care.

How could they?

Every time this phrase crossed your mind your anger grew with it.

Who makes this kind of deal. Your parents that’s who.

Though you were mad at your parents more than anything all you could do was think ....why me.

You had been trying your best to keep yourself together but this was not fair. Ok you knew that sounded bratty but why..why...why..why. You took on the second job you tried helping but this was too much.

“We’re meeting with him tomorrow to go over everything,” was the only thing you remember your mom saying before both of your parents left the room.

As the door closed behind them you felt all your self control release.

Tomorrow was going to change everything you ever knew.

(Next day)

“Well I guess this place is big enough right.”

You had honestly been zoned out all the way to the home where you were to meet your fake Mr. Forever....Kim Namjoon or as many knew him RM.

Both of your parents didn’t try to talk to you during the car ride. Granted they wouldn’t have gotten a response out of you anyways.

Since last night you refused to speak to them or even be in the same room as them if you were being honest.

You understood that they saw this as the only way out and they believed that this was the only solution but you were still beyond pissed off but more than anything you were hurt.

Hurt by the decisions that had been negatively effecting your life. To be honest though more than anything it hurt knowing that these decisions weren’t yours to begin with.

How is it that your dad was the one who caused all of these issues but yet here you were being used to fix everything.

“Mr. Kim is ready for you. I’ll take you to his office” one of the maids had said to you and your parents as you had entered the home.

“Well fuck me right.”

As your parents were about to step forward to follow the maid to the office with you they were stopped.

“Actually Mr. Kim would like to speak with (Y/N) alone.”

“Greeeeeeaaaaatttt this only gets better and better.”

You simply nod and follow her until you’re facing the door to the office.

“Well here goes nothing I guess. It’s not like I’m allowed to say no.” You said to yourself.

And then you do it. YOU KNOCK ON THE DOOR.

“Come in”

You step through the door only to feel your heart drop out your ass.

NO. FUCKING. WAY.

It’s the obnoxious dude from the bus. Your fake fiancé is the guy you almost tackled yesterday. Is this a joke? It has to be. Why would he want to marry you?

“I see you’re a little shocked. I mean I can understand considering this isn’t our first meeting and it’s not like you made an amazing first impression yesterday. “ He said as he walked towards you.

“Well apparently I made some type of impression on you considering the circumstances we’re currently in wouldn’t you say....amigo” You snap at him.

“Im not your amigo....I’m your fiancé.”

“Yes without even asking would you look at that your manners seem to have stayed the same.”

He narrowed his eyes at you obviously becoming annoyed as he now stood in front of you.

Once again though you didn’t care. Why should you? He was forcing you into an arranged marriage to get your family out of a very very bad situation. His feelings really didn’t mean much to you.

“I see your attitude is also the same.”

“What do you expect? You can’t think I’m happy about this.”

“Im just giving your family a way out that works for everyone. So you can take it or leave it no ones making you do anything it’s simply a deal. Whether you take it or not I’ll leave up to you....not your parents.”

So he was going to let you decide? Definitely didn’t see this one coming. Something told you that it couldn’t be that easy.

“Before you decide though let me tell you what’s going to happen if you don’t take it. 1st your father is going to be immediately targeted by Samuel and his gang for stealing from their operation. You think the beating he got was yesterday was bad....that was nothing he’d be lucky if they let him live which I doubt. 2nd his debt is gonna fall on your mom and when she can’t pay it they will come after her or even worse your sisters.”

You wanted to be calm and say it wasn’t true and that you would figure it out. That you guys would be fine without his help but you knew that he wasn’t lying. The more you tried to belittle the situation the worse it was going to get.

“......and what happens if decide to take your deal?”

“In regards to your family I would pay off your fathers debt and relocate your parents to a new home. They would be safe and I promise that they will lead a comfortable lifestyle. Your sisters I think it’s best to keep them in the dark as much as possible so they will stay put but will be given security to make sure they are safe. And obviously you will stay with me so you will not need to worry about your own safety.“

“Why are you doing this?”

“Im trying to grow in my own investments.......If I’m married I won’t have to worry about someone trying to sneak into my bed trying to sabotage my work. I need someone who I know doesn’t have connections to this world. It also looks good to investors to be married. To make it simple you need me as much as I need you.”

“Granted there are obviously other conditions in regards to the marriage aspect of our deal.” He continued

“Such as? You might as well tell me everything at once.”

“Alright. Well it would be best to get married as soon as possible so I’m going to say let’s go ahead and plan for next week.”

“NEXT WEEK!”

Namjoon didn’t pay any mind to your sudden outburst and continued on.

“Anyways afterwards we’ll plan to head back to Seoul as that is where I mainly reside. You will be my wife so you also will be living with me. As my wife you will attend parties, luncheons, you know normal wife things I suppose.”

Sooo many thoughts were running through your head that you thought at any moment it was going to become too much and you were going to black out.

He wants you to go to Seoul! First of all you’ve never stepped foot out of the US other than to go to Mexico and now you’re being asked to live in Korea. A country where you didn’t even know the language.

Also could you really be someone’s wife? Even better question was could you be HIS wife knowing the kind of work he was in? You didn’t know.

“So what do you say do we have a deal?” He asked as he extended his hand to you.

Feeling as though you were drowning with all this information you didn’t know what to do.

All you could think about was your family. Yes you were in this mess without your consent but regardless you loved all of them and you knew that you would do anything for them. So with that you turned to Namjoon.

“Just promise me they stay safe and I’ll keep my part.”

With that you extended your hand into his.

Author’s Note: Here’s part 2 sorry it took me a minute to post this. Lol i posted it earlier but felt as though it was missing something so reposted it. Also I just read where if you have a link in your writing it doesn’t come up in the search. I went ahead and removed the pt 1 link but it is attached to my masterlist. Please let me know what you think any feedback is greatly appreciated :)

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justtextmeoppa · 7 years ago

Text

BTS Masterlist / Hyung line

Texts

Seokjin (Jin)

-When your boyfriend cheers you up because you’re stressed about your writing and you want to give up

-When you prank him that they’re cheating and you find out that they’re really cheating on you.

-When you find out they made a bet to go out with you

-When your boyfriend is stressed because you two have to keep your relationship a secret and throw his stress on you

-When he tries to comfort you because you’re sick again

-Cute everyday morning texts

-“Don’t worry, I’m used to it” / When your twin Seokjin doesn’t want to let you meet the band because he’s scared to be replaced

-When your boyfriend Seokjin misses you a lot because you’re at your grandparents house, away from him

-When your boyfriend Seokjin tries to make you feel better because you’re on your period

-“ You killed my french fries” / When your boyfriend Seokjin is jokingly angry with you because you locked yourself in your room with a lot of junk food.

-When Seokjin is scared to lose you becuase you’re working with Eddy Kim

-When they find out your kink and “teases” you about it

-When they found your tumblr blog

-Drunk in love

-When they find out that you used to salf-harm

-When you get jealous after seeing him with another female kpop singer and seemed too close to her

-Jealous Jin when you starting hang out with his Friend Jaehwan

-Everyday texts with your “special” friend

-“Scary nightmare”; When they text you after a painful nightmare.

-Remember me

-When they find out that their gf has a secret side job as trashy romance novelist.

-When they see you with another guy (your brother or cousin) and they become jealous.

-You, your boyfriend and your “drama fever”

-You, Seokjin and your best friend Jungkook: Pt1 - Pt2 - Pt3 - Pt4 - Pt5

-When they find out your kink and “tease” you about it

Yoongi (Suga)

-You and Yoongi are best friends for years but now you’ve to leave for studies. Italy, your biggest dream. What’ll happen to your friendship with him once you’re gone? (Pt1 - Pt2 - Pt3 - Pt4 - Pt5 - Pt6 - Pt7 - Pt8 - Pt9 - Pt10 - Pt11) - Ongoing

-Daily texts - Yoongi and his daughter’s babysitter: (Pt1 - Pt2 - Pt3 ) - Ongoing

-When they find out your kink and “tease” you about it.

-BTS!AU / Every day texts with your Vampire Boyfriend Yoongi

-When your boyfriend wants to make a collab with you but you don’t think to be a good rapper yet

-When they find out that their gf have to go with another idol (JB or Yugyeom) at “we got married”

-When your older brother find out you’re dating Sanha from Astro

-When they reassure their girlfriend because she’s insecure about her being a tomboy

-When you prank him that they’re cheating and you find out that they’re really cheating on you.

-“Happy birthday handsome boy!” / Male x male reader

-When you find out they made a bet to go out with you

-When your boyfriend Yoongi teases you about your fangirling over “Goblin’s end”, but he ends up crying as well

-When your boyfriend is stressed because you two have to keep your relationship a secret and throw his stress on you

-When you suddenly became distant

-College!Au - Everyday fluffy/smutty texts with your boyfriend Teacher!Yoongi

-When you and Yoongi are fake dating because you want to come back with your ex, but he fells in love with you

-When your boyfriend Yoongi become overprotective (and jealous) because one of the maknae line tried to hit on you

-Fluffly texts with your boyfriend Yoongi

-When he tries to comfort you because you’re sick again

-When you tell to your boyfriend you’re scared because someone is following you and it turns out that he’s from an enemy gang / MAFIA!AU

-Everyday texts with your savage boyfriend Yoongi aka Miss Agustina D

-“You were right” / When your boyfriend Yoongi doesn’t want to use couples outift but gets jealous after seeing a photo of you and Heechul on SNS

-“I’m your personal cheerleader” / When your boyfriend Yoongi tries to motivate you.

-When your boyfriend Yoongi texts you when you’re down and tries to cheer you up

-Sexting with your boyfriend Yoongi

-“It’s a beautiful day” / When your boyfriend Yoongi can’t wish you “happy birthday” because he has “the swag”

-When your boyrfiend Yoongi gets angry and jealous with you

-“Thanks for saving me.. Again.” / When Yoongi is too scared of himself and his thoughts

-Everyday “smut” texts with your daddy Yoongi

-Everyday fluffy texts with your boyfriend Yoongi

-When they find out that they’re dating a famous female rapper

-When you and your boyfriend Yoongi have a fight and break up + “I wanna be better for you”

-When he’s on tour and shows you everything’s going on + “You’re mine” / Yoongi jealous

-When they find out that their girlfriend has a side job as voice actress because she wants to create her own anime.

-When you tell to your boyfriend Yoongi you just won a national art contest

-When you’re scared and finally say to your boyfriend that someone has followed and bothered you

-When Yoongi gets jealous after seeing a mexican boy flirting with you + BTS want to learn spanish

-When Yoongi is scared to losing you

-When they found your tumblr blog

-Drunk in love

-When they find out that you used to salf-harm

-When you get jealous after seeing him with another female kpop singer and seemed too close to her

-When your ex bother you

-When they see you with another guy (your brother or cousin) and they become jealous

-This is the end?? Pt 1 - Pt 2 - Pt 3

-Yoongi aka Min Genius aka jealous boyfriend.

-Remember me

-After a fight

-Joke by Taehyung and Jimin! Fake break up between yoongixreader

Hoseok (J-Hope)

-When you prank him that they’re cheating and you find out that they’re really cheating on you

-When they find out you used to self-harm

-When they find out that their gf has a secret side job as trashy romance novelist

-When you’re scared and finally say to your boyfriend that someone has followed and bothered you

-When your boyfriend cheers you up because you’re stressed about your writing and you want to give up

-When they reassure their girlfriend because she’s insecure about her being a tomboy

-Cute everyday morning texts

-Everyday texts

-When they find out you are latina

-When your boyfriend Hoseok gets angry, because of jealousy, with you

-Drunk in love

-When you get jealous after seeing him with another female kpop singer and seemed too close to her

-“Scary nightmare”; When they text you after a painful nightmare.

-Hoseok and the “YOU HAD TO LET ME TALK FIRST!”

-What about us?

-When they see you with another guy (your brother or cousin) and they become jealous.

-You, your boyfriend and your “drama fever”

-Texts with chef Hoseok!

-When your boyfriend wants to make a collab with you but you don’t think to be a good rapper yet

Namjoon (RM)

-When your boyfriend wants to make a collab with you but you don’t think to be a good rapper yet

-When they see you with another guy (your brother or cousin) and they become jealous

-When they find out that their gf have to go with another idol (JB or Yugyeom) at “we got married”

-When they reassure their girlfriend because she’s insecure about her being a tomboy

-Rap monster where he gets jealous over his idol girlfriend who had to do sexy concept with Kard’s Matthew

-When you buy gift and spoil him

-When your boyfriend Namjoon accidentally blurts that you two are dating during a VLive

-When your boyfriend is stressed because you two have to keep your relationship a secret and throw his stress on you

-Mafia!AU - When Namjoon is a Mafia boss and you’re his wife

-When namjoon finds out you’re dating yoongi

-Fluff/angst/fluff idol life

-Rap Monster: Where you’re his girlfriend and notices Tinashe is his phone wallpaper in V live and gets hurt

-When you suddenly became distant

-When you can’t sleep and text your boyfriend Namjoon

-Rapmon and Jimin’s s/o sending pictures of their adopted kitten/s that misses them while on tour

-Namjoon where he texts you after 2 years after he rejected you and your brother has your phone

-When you tell to your boyfriend you’re scared because someone is following you and it turns out that he’s from an enemy gang / MAFIA!AU

-“Perv” NamJoon aka worst best friend in the UNIVERSE

-I’m not the only one

-I like you Namjoon

-Far away best friend

-When Namjoon Does’t want you in his +19 MV

-I miss my princesses

-When you prank him that they’re cheating and you find out that they’re really cheating on you

-Jealous Joon breaks up with you but.

-When your boyfriend Namjoon is pissed off becuase you’ve Kiji’s photos on your phone

-Sweet texts

-When they find out that they’re dating a famous female rapper

-Jealous Joon in tour

-When you’re scared and finally say to your boyfriend that someone has followed and bothered you

-When you’re down but you don’t want him to know

-When they find out your kink

-Drunk in love

-When they find out you used to self-harm

-When you get jealous after seeing him with another female kpop singer and seemed too close to her

-“Scary nightmare” / When they call you after a nightmare

-Remember me

-When Namjoon pranks you but you’re hurt and don’t reply to his texts

-You, your boyfriend and your “drama fever”

-After a fight

-What about us pt 1 - pt 2

-When they find out that their gf has a secret side job as trashy romance novelist

-When you ignore him after he hurt you

-When your ex bothers you

-When you prank him and this leads at the break up

-Everyday texts with your “special” friend

-When they see you with another boy (brother or cousin) and they become jealous

-After a break up

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Scenarios

Seokjin (Jin)

-“I’m Mr. Worldwide handsome”

-“It was meant to be”

-Werewolf!Au + SHINee’s Kim Jonghyun: Pt1 - Pt2 - Pt3 - Pt4 - Pt 5

Yoongi (Suga)

-“Take of your clothes” / Yoonmin ship

-“Ordinary life”

-“Just tell me the truth”

-“I want her with me”

-“It’s impossible not to love me”

-“No one can touch you”

-“I want to spend my life with you” / Second part of “No one can touch you”

-“You are my paradise”

-“I fell in love with you”

-“Happy anniversary”

-“That’s my lady”

-“It’s nice that smile”

-“Do you really love him?” ft Got7 BamBam

-“He completes me”

Hoseok (J-Hope)

-“He’ll save us”

-“He completes me”

Namjoon (RM)

-“Everything is going to be okay”

-“I promise”

-“You are my americano”

-“I missed you like crazy”

-“I hate you Kim Namjoon”

-“Just like you baby”

-“You are the one”

-“I missed you”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Aesthetic

Seokjin (Jin)

-Gryffindor house

-“It’s easy to play dirty”

-“I’m the king of the heart”

-“You are my sunshine”

-“I’ll see you in my mind”

-“You are my sunshine” / Boyfriend!Au moodboard

-“Flowers can’t solve all problems but they are a great start”

Yoongi (Suga)

-Slytherin House

-“Bubble gum bitch”

-“I found you”

-“Baby let’s get high”

-“I love the savour of mint”

-“I’m a bad boy”

-We’re the masters of our own fate

-“Slow descent to hell”

-“It’s all right”

-“You’re my safe place”

-“I’m still a vampire after all”

-“You’re my first and only”

-Disney Yoongi

-“When I saw you I fell in love”

-“Dawn”

-Aesthetic Yoongi Boyfriend

Hoseok (J-Hope)

-Hufflepuff house

-“Just dance, my lady”

-“Baby you are my fairytale”

-“Baby it’s cold outside”

-“Just another day together”

Namjoon (RM)

-Gryffindor house

-“You are stunning Kim Namjoon”

-Disney Namjoon

-“You’re mine”

-“I am home”

-Black aesthetic

-“What if I asked, what if I asked you to stay?”

-“I felt in love in a different place”

-“Everything is blue”

-“I’ll be a good girl for you”

-“Will you marry me?”

-Aesthetic Boyfriend

#bts #masterlist #hyung line

221 notes · View notes

dari-ede · 2 years ago

Text

In the Middle of the Night: Chapter 10

Chapter 10: "아주 고요한 너와 나의 속삭임"

Chapters: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 - 18 - 19 - 20 - 21 - 22 - 23 - 24 - 25 - 26 - 27 - 28 - 29 - 30

MASTERLIST

****************

Genre: Friends to Lovers, Fluff and Smut

Pairing: Idol!Namjoon x Female Character

Rating: M (explicit language, mild sexual explicit language)

Status: COMPLETE

NOTE: Trying something new and releasing this a little earlier than usual. Also, it's JK's birthday, so I figured, why the heck not? 🥰

**************

-Workshop Day Four-

The next morning was similar to the day before, only it was Yoongi who had sent an early message asking for assistance. Once again, Namjoon and I didn’t get to spend our morning alone and I left him another note explaining my whereabouts.

This time, I was sure to not forget my jacket as I made my way through the wind to get to the main house. Judging by the soft wind and light rain, it seemed as if the storm was calming down. However, it was still rather cold—then again, I easily got cold.

I entered the main house and was welcomed with warmth. The only one present was Yoongi. Because I was the only other musician on the premises, Yoongi had asked to borrow one of my guitars. The strings on his had torn and he needed a guitar for today’s workshop.

Thankfully, I had traveled with two.

“Thanks,” he mumbled, taking one of the guitar cases from me. “Do you have a preference?”

I shook my head. He opened both cases and took out the guitars to see which one he would prefer.

I turned to the kitchen, eyeing the stove to see if there was any food prepared. “Have you cooked anything?”

“Jin-hyung said he would take care of breakfast; I’m doing lunch. Not sure who’s handling dinner yet.” Yoongi played around with my guitar, trying to get comfortable with it. “Jin should be here soon.”

Sure enough, I saw Jin making his way towards the main house. “Good morning,” he said as he walked in wearing his neat pajamas. He was the only one who wore proper nightwear. The rest of the guys wore simple t-shirts and gym shorts or close to nothing at all.

He caught me staring. “What?”

“You’re the only guy I know who actually wears pajamas. Just an observation.” I walked over to the espresso machine to prepare my coffee.

“That’s because you don’t know many men,” he said jokingly.

I cracked a smile. “So all the other guys are little boys?”

He nodded as he washed his hands so he could start prepping breakfast. “Don’t worry, Namjoon will evolve eventually.”

I wasn’t going to fall for his trap, so I didn’t answer. Yoongi, on the other hand, let out a loud laugh in the other room.

“Maiwa, what’s going on with you and Namjoonie?” Yoongi asked.

I did my best to come across as confused. “What do you mean?”

“Dr-drop the act, there’s something going on. I'm shore—sure of it,” Yoongi was now in the room, a look of mischief in his eyes. He was definitely excited about his suspicions because he was stuttering, a habit of his when he was either too tired or too excited. “He was too happy yesterday. He kept laughing at everything.”

“Did you guys sleep together?” Jin asked shamelessly.

“Kim Seokjin!” I smacked him.

He laughed. “Why-why-why? Would that be a bad thing? You’re both adults.”

“We’re friends,” I ducked my head, embarrassed by the feeling of heat coursing through my cheek and neck.

“With benefits?” came a voice from above us. A giggle followed.

“Isn’t it too early for you to be up?” I called out to the eavesdropping bunny above us.

Jungkook’s giggle continued. “You were really flirty with him yesterday.”

“I’m always flirty,” I argued.

“Not like that,” Yoongi’s face was beaming as he stared at me. “Come on, be honest. We won’t tell.”

That was a lie. “Please. Let’s say for shits and giggles that there was something going on between Namjoon and me and I decided to tell you. You would be off whispering the gossip into Jimin’s ear. And then Jimin would tell Taehyung and Hoseok. And if it wasn’t for Mean Girls Karen Smith on the second floor at the moment, Jungkook would be the next to know.”

Yoongi looked almost offended by the accusation. “I’m no gossip.”

“You tell Jimin every rumor you hear about,” I said bluntly.

“Jimin hardly tells me any gossip anymore,” Jungkook defended himself.

“Who’s Karen Smith?” Jin asked, looking lost as he worked on the veggies.

“No, I don’t,” Yoongi argued.

We went back and forth for a good while, the topic of discussion changing. I was proud of myself—Yoongi had completely forgotten about his suspicions.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In the middle of breakfast, another producer, Hiss Noise, dropped by for the workshop. He was only going to stay until the next day. He and Hyunseo were scheduled to leave in the morning. After tomorrow, the eight of us were going to be left fully alone.

Because of Noise’s short stay, we had a lot of work to do today. The workshop was more intense than the previous ones and longer.

During one of the breaks, most of the guys spread out throughout the main house, stretching and regaining energy.

As others walked around the house doing various things, I was sitting on one of the chairs in the living room playing the song we were testing on my guitar. For the last few hours I had been playing the same chords and I couldn’t shake the feeling that something didn’t sound right.

I looked at the sheet notes, thinking of how to fix it. And then it felt like I had found a fix.

“What’s up?” asked Namjoon, almost as if he could hear my thoughts.

Setting my guitar on the floor, I answered, “I don’t think this song calls for strings.”

“Piano?” asked Yoongi, also reading my mind. “I was thinking the same earlier.” He took out his keyboard and plugged it in.

Walking towards his seat I took it as soon as he stood up. I set the music sheet in front of me and played the song on the piano and dropped the tempo, humming the lyrics.

Namjoon and Yoongi, and a couple of the other guys, listened to my changes.

“Blues,” Yoongi said, understanding where I was trying to take the song.

I played it once again from the top, only this time, I sang the lyrics Namjoon had written. At the song’s crescendo, my vocals turned full R&B. Maybe it was due to the Proposal song I had been working on in my free time, but this For Youth song Namjoon had created felt like it needed some soul.

I finished the song softly, using simple and quiet notes.

A few of the members clapped.

“Jungkook is going to have fun on that last part,” Jin said, giving the youngest an encouraging slap on the back.

Jungkook let out a nervous laugh. “That’s going to be difficult.”

“You’ve done runs before,” I reminded him. While Jungkook tended to sing with an R&B/Pop feel, he rarely sang soulful runs and riffs. His runs were usually clean, so I could see how my take on the song was giving him worry.

“Not like you,” Jungkook answered.

“You don’t have to sound like me. Sound like you,” I pointed out. “But push yourself a little more. You said you want to experiment with your voice,” I reminded him.

This made him calm down. He had made mentioned in a private meeting with me that he wanted to do something different with his voice for this next album. Here was an opportunity.

“You got this, bro,” Hobi said enthusiastically.

Jungkook let out a sigh and walked over to the chair next to me.

Together, Jungkook and I practiced on the note as the other guys took a break. Namjoon and Hiss continued to work on the lyrics.

From where I was sitting, Namjoon seemed to be struggling. I tried to keep my focus on Jungkook, making a mental note to ask Namjoon about my worry in private later tonight.

“Ah, shit! What is that?” Hobi ducked down and went around me, who was closest to him.

His frightened state gave little concern to everyone. Most ignored his exclamation while some turned out of mild interest.

Hobi took hold of my arms and kept me in place in front of him—using me as a shield. I followed his eyes and caught sight of the threatening bug.

I followed the flying creature and thought it must be a moth by the way it was maneuvering. It was too dark to be a butterfly.

“Maya, go get it,” Hobi said, pushing me forward.

Most of the guys continued going about their business, paying Hobi no mind.

The moth flew up to the second floor, landing on the staircase rail. I let out a sigh. “Fine.” I knew if the bug wasn’t taken outside, Hobi would be extremely paranoid.

I made my way up the stairs, keeping my eyes directly at it so I wouldn’t lose it.

“You’ll be my hero Mai-Mai,” Hobi called out.

“Where’s she going?” Namjoon said in the distance.

Hobi explained to Namjoon what I was doing just as I got to the staircase where the moth was. I didn’t want to hurt it—I wanted to capture it and let it free outside. Keeping my eyes on it, I called out to the guys downstairs. “Can someone bring me a small container—preferably with a lid?”

“Yup,” Jimin called out.

I stayed put until I felt Jimin at my side, handing me the container. I made slow movements towards it, but the moth took off and flew higher up, landing on one of the posts on the second floor, above the balcony.

My eyes didn’t leave it as I went up the stairs and got to the second-story landing.

“Maya, don’t,” Namjoon’s voice was stern and almost commanding.

I ignored him and reached the post where the moth was.

“Noona, it's dangerous,” Jimin’s voice was full of concern.

“Jungkook, Noise, Jin come here,” Namjoon bellowed. “Stay under the stairs in case she falls.” Namjoon hurried up the stairs.

The guys hurried and followed orders.

“I’m not gonna fall,” I said, already standing on the thin beam, balancing myself.

Several voices below began to lecture me.

They were overreacting. I held onto the post and made a reach for the moth, but it was too far from me.

Suddenly, large hands were keeping hold of me around the waist. “Maya, get down.” Namjoon sounded as if he was on the verge of screaming at me.

I pushed up to my tiptoes, struggling with his strong hold on me.

“Oh! Maya, really, it’s not that serious. Get down,” Hobi’s voice sounded slightly panicked. He was at my other side now, holding my leg from around the post.

I made a final reach and trapped the moth inside the container. Its little wigs flapped violently inside, struggling to get out. I looked down at the concerned faces underneath me. “Here,” I said as I looked at Jimin.

Jimin took it from my hands and stepped back. “Will you get down now, please?”

As carefully as I could, I balanced myself on the beam. Namjoon’s and Hobi’s hands had stayed on me, ensuring they would catch me if I slipped. I was ready to jump off but the hands on my waist were impatient.

“I got her, Hoba,” Namjoon assured with finality.

Once Hoseok’s hands were off my leg, Namjoon took full control and took me off the beam. His solid arms handled me as if I was lightweight. My hands shot to his broad shoulders to keep myself balanced.

With great gentleness that I never would have imagined coming from Namjoon, my feet hit solid ground. His gentle touch made my heart flutter like the moth's wings. I almost forgot we were in front of our friends…and that he was upset with me. However, as my eyes reached his, the warm fuzzy feeling left.

His dark brown eyes scolded me. “What the hell was that?” he demanded.

I let out a sigh and stepped away from his embrace. “I was fine. As if I haven’t climbed on things before.”

“Not something that’s 6 meters above the ground. You could have broken your neck.”

“I was careful.” I did my best to keep my voice steady. I knew Namjoon, along with the rest of the guys, was concerned, but I didn’t like being treated like a child—especially in front of my friends. A light embarrassment came over me at the sight of everyone looking at us.

“Over a moth? It would have been better if we used a broom to swat it out instead. It’s not worth you risking your neck.” Namjoon’s voice was not getting lower. Quite the opposite, his voice was getting louder.

“I know what I was doing. I’ve climbed trees all my life not to mention I did gymnastics and specialized in the balance beam,” I said, irritating in me rising.

“Alright, let’s settle down,” Jimin intercepted, trying to calm things down. He placed a careful hand on Namjoon’s shoulder. “Noona, hyung was only worried. He doesn’t mean to treat you like a child. You scared all of us. He knows you were being careful—we all do, but it still doesn’t stop us from worrying. Just think if it was the reverse: hyungi doing something dangerous.”

The thought of Namjoon standing on top of a 20-foot staircase came to mind and absolute terror came over. Jimin was right, I would have been livid. But I was experienced and not clumsy like Namjoon.

Jimin gave his older brother a light shove, signaling him to say something.

Namjoon didn't look ready to say anything at first, he still looked rather upset. However, after a few seconds, Namjoon let out a sigh and gave a nod, clearly to having calmed himself. “I apologize. I shouldn't have scolded.”

I gave him a nod. “Ok.” I gave a small smile, letting him know I was letting it go.

He looked relieved and returned the small smile.

Jimin’s face brightened, delighted to have settled things. “Ok. Let me take this little one out." He looked into the container to make sure the moth was still ok. Then he made his way down the stairs, Hoseok at his heels.

Namjoon took another breath and brought his hand to my shoulder. “I really am sorry.”

“It’s ok. Jimini’s right. If things were in reverse, I would have been terrified.” I leaned in and gave him a half hug.

Both his arms came around me and held me warmly.

I would have wanted nothing more than to stay like that with him, but we were shortly called down for dinner.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

We worked a little while more after dinner but were too exhausted to continue. All of us exhausted, we were scattered along the house. The storm had gotten some momentum; the wind had picked up and the rain was coming a little harder. The guys were hesitant to leave to the other houses.

Noise was on the couch staring out into the backyard, watching the mild storm. “Hyunseo, I go half a mind in leavin’ tonight instead. Tomorrow the storm could be worse, man.”

Hyunseo shook his head. “We’ll be without light. Driving through the storm at night is risky. It’s best if we leave first thing.”

Noise nodded and turned to his younger comrades. “Y’all gonna be good here? This storm ain’t leveling up.”

“We got resources for the worse, if it happens,” Jin assured. “We have a plan set up. If things get too bad, we’re all going to take solace here. It’s the most stable of the houses and completely stoked.”

“Eight of you in one house?” Noise asked, shocked. Then he began to get up.

“We’ve lived together for ten years,” Jin pointed out.

“But no longer than that,” I heard Taehyung mutter.

I turned to him and remembered our first day here. They were giving up their shared dorm. I had been distracted by everything else that I had forgotten to ask Namjoon for further details. There was no reason for me to doubt Yoongi when he said everything was good between them, but there was something there that the guys weren’t sharing. I had meant to bring it up with Namjoon, but with our newly discovered feelings, I had forgotten about it.

Noise didn’t seem to hear Yoongi because he made no comment about it and was announcing he was going to head to his room. Hyunseo was right behind him.

As they left, I caught Namjoon’s eyes. He quickly looked away, clearly avoiding the topic.

If he really thought that was going to work, he was about to be proven wrong. I got to my feet. “I’m going to call it a night as well. I want to get out of here before the storm can get worse.”

Namjoon let out a breath. He wasn’t about to let me go outside by myself. He knew I was doing this intentionally. “We’ll message you guys as soon we get to the backhouse. Let’s all make sure we’re communicating. We’re scattered in four houses, so let’s keep in touch.”

Everyone nodded, agreeing with their leader.

After putting on our jackets, Namjoon and I made our mini hike up the small hill to get to the backhouse. The wind wasn’t too harsh, but the constant rain had made the ground muddy. I had to keep hold of Namjoon to keep myself from tripping a few times.

Surprisingly, Namjoon was steady and balanced on our way up the hill. He guided me inside the safety of the house before entering himself.

We couldn’t leave our shoes outside, too worried they might be taken by the wind. We took off our shoes and left them at the entrance of the home.

“Tea?” Namjoon asked, taking my jacket from me as I took it off.

“Yes, please,” I said.

He walked over to the kitchen to turn on the kettle.

I didn’t beat around the bush. “So, care to explain the whole dorm thing?”

He shrugged his shoulders as if the news was no big deal. “None of us are there anymore. Someone sleeps there once a week—tops. What’s the point of keeping it?” He was avoiding eye contact.

“Namjoon.” My voice was clear and serious.

Slowly, he turned to me but didn’t say a word. Just stood there looking…almost sad.

“What’s going on?” I asked, concern filling my voice.

There was a look of hopelessness in his eyes. It took him a moment to speak. “We’re taking a break after the album comes out.”

“What do you mean ‘break’?” My brain went to a dozen different places at the word, but rather than think the worst, I stayed calm. I didn't want to overreact without getting more details.

“I just can’t…do this anymore.” There was a sudden switch in his demeanor. His shoulders sagged, his face was fragile, and his body stiffened in a fight or flight type of way. The usual collected Namjoon was disheveled. “We’re set to come up with a small mini album that will contain new original music along with the anthology. On top of that, I’ve been trying to work on my own personal music that I really want to release, but can't because I should be focusing on music of the group. I have all these ideas of what I want to sing about but struggle in finding a sound for us as a group. And I know the guys are looking at me to give them a direction for a new era—but I can’t think of one. Meanwhile, these other songs I want for myself keep circulating in my head and I can’t get them out because I need to focus on Bangtan.”

He was rambling, talking fast and his pitch was going up and down. I had never seen him so stressed.

“Hey, hey, hey. It’s alright. Breathe, sweetie. Breathe.” I lightly rubbed his arms and tried to keep him still.

He let out a breath, his eyes holding some moisture. He was close to losing it.

That was the thing with Namjoon. He had an overall good hold of his emotions, and kept calm and collected most of the time. But once he opened up, he was like a faucet. His feelings took full over. I had seen him cry several times before, but never looking so disheveled.

I tried to calm him. “First, the mini album is not a must. PD-nim was very specific that this anthology was to be whatever the seven of you decided on. If you guys come up with two or three new songs, then that’s all there will be. It’s supposed to be a no-pressure workshop. That’s what we’re doing here: trying to help you guys figure out what you want this album to be.” I rubbed his arms, trying to soothe him. "If there are not enough songs for a mini-album, then fuck it. Just come up with one and make the rest of the work only an anthology."

His eyes were still hurt, still avoiding me.

“And the guys will completely understand the pressure you’re going through. If you’re at a stump, then you’re at a stump. There’s nothing you can do about it. Take it from someone who is currently there.”

He wasn’t convinced, still showing doubts.

I took his face in my hands, gently rubbing his cheeks. “You worry too much, you know that? And your worry makes me worry.”

It was true. Namjoon often looked like he carried the weight of the world on his shoulders. Over the years, he had allowed the guys to take some of that burden away, but he still held so much responsibility. Put too much pressure on himself to excel. He was such a perfectionist that if he felt he wasn’t reaching certain expectations, he felt himself a failure. Failure was something Kim Namjoon did not do well.

His eyes met mine and he noticed my worry. “Sorry.” His arms came around me.

“Have you told this to the guys?” I asked, stepping into his embrace.

He nodded. “You didn’t say anything they didn’t already mention to me. I told them….” He stopped himself, looking hurt.

“What?”

Several tears began to form in his eyes again. “I told them I was feeling…lost. I don’t know where in Bangtan I belong. If I can’t be the songwriter the group needs me to be, then what’s my role? At the same time, I feel too linked to them—like I lost my self-identity. I have songs I want to do for myself, but then I feel…guilty.” He lifted his hands off me and rubbed his eyes. “So much shit going on in my head.”

My hands stayed on his arms. “And you think that physical distance will help,” I said, understanding now why they were giving up the dorms.

“It’s a big reason why. I’m hardly there anyway. I sleep there a couple of times a month, but mostly out of obligation. Obligation to the company, the group, PD-nim, the team…. But the more time I spend there, the more I feel out of place. It just doesn’t feel like it’s ours anymore.” He kept talking out loud without a linear thought. Now that he was voicing his concerns, all his worries were spilling out of him—dying to finally be let out.

Judging by his reaction, I had a feeling his previous statement about having told the guys about his worries was only a half-truth. “Have you discussed everything with the guys?”

His eyes dodged mine.

I wanted to scold him. Tell him that keeping all his worries to himself did not help his mental health. But that’s not what he needed at the moment. He was having a moment of vulnerability and needed support.

I reached for his face, my fingers grazed over his chin until his eyes fell on mine. “They love and trust you. If you feel this will help, then there’s no need for guilt. You’re voicing your needs—you should never feel guilty about that.”

There was a slight calmness that came over him, but a grey cloud full of worry still lingered around him.

For a long moment, he kept his brown eyes on me and it seemed as if he wanted to tell me something but was holding back. I knew the feeling. The burden of keeping your worries to yourself and not allowing loved ones to help you. I wanted him to tell me everything, but from personal experience, I knew it was all up to him. He should only tell me once he was ready.

I stayed quiet and continued to hold him, patiently waiting for his next step.

After what seemed like an hour, he took a seat on one of the bar stools along the kitchen island, pulled me with him, and rested his forehead against mine.

He wasn’t ready to vocalize all he wanted to quite yet, but silently, he was asking if I could help with the heavy load. My arms came around his back and I pulled him closer. Without a doubt, I would happily take on his burden. I would take all his worries and carry it all myself if I was able to.

He took in a deep breath, using only his nose. It felt as if he was taking in the full scent around him. Like he was breathing me in.

Slowly, I felt Namjoon’s shoulders relax. The hands he had on my hips had a light touch to them now. The grey cloud had sailed away.

It didn’t take long for our kissing to start. Unlike the previous nights, Namjoon’s movements were softer, sweeter. There was no sense of urgency; we knew we had all night and there was no need to rush. He took his time exploring my lips, neck, and face with his lips. His hands wandered around my back, hips, and sides, but didn't push too much.

As our lips danced with each other, a roar of thunder rumbled in the distance.

---------------

NOTE: Thank you for the support, everyone. It's very much appreciated. As much as I'm enjoying writing fluff, I AM going to be posting some more mature content in the next chapter. I didn't expect this fic to be a long burn to get to the smutty scenes, but Kim Namjoon didn't let me speed things up! He's too much of a damn gentleman. But I'm putting my damn foot down and showing him who's boss! 🤨😅

Chapters: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 - 18 - 19 - 20 - 21 - 22 - 23 - 24 - 25 - 26 - 27 - 28 - 29 - 30

MASTERLIST

#bts #bts fanfic #kim namjoon #rm x reader #rm #latina #fluff #secret relationship #InTheMiddleOfTheNight #eventual smut #Spotify #bts rm #namjoon fanfic #namjoon x reader #idol!female oc #idol!rm x idol!oc #idol!namjoon #idol!rm #rm x maya

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dari-ede · 2 years ago

Text

In the Middle of the Night: Chapter 8

Chapter 8: "갑작스런 내 고백이"

Chapters: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 - 18 - 19 - 20 - 21 - 22 - 23 - 24 - 25 - 26 - 27 - 28 - 29 - 30

MASTERLIST

*************

Genre: Friends to Lovers, Fluff and Smut

Pairing: Idol!Namjoon x Female Reader

Rating: M (future sexual/explicit scenes)

Status: COMPLETE

****************

-Workshop Day Two-

Throughout the night, I kept repeating the flirting coming from Namjoon, trying to figure out if it had been innocent or if a line had been crossed. I had always openly flirted with Namjoon. At the beginning of knowing the guys, I flirted with the entire hyung line, trying to get a reaction out of them. Yoongi and Jin were typically unbothered by it—brushing me off or swatting me away. I lost interest in flirting with them pretty quickly. Namjoon and Hoseok were the only ones who reacted to my ways. Namjoon would turn a glowing red and get incredibly shy. Hoseok would giggle and blush but would play along and flirt back.

However, Namjoon never flirted back. Last night had been a first. The dragon look in his eyes had felt like a seduction.

And instead of feeling odd about my best friend putting the moves on me, I felt excitement. It was one thing for this to be a one-sided crush but if Namjoon’s feelings towards me were more than friendly, it changed everything.

The alarm I had set up went off. I stopped it quickly before it could wake Namjoon. I had gotten little sleep, despite the melatonin. And judging by the noises coming from Namjoon’s room across the hall last night, it seemed he hadn’t gotten much sleep either.

After tidying my bed, I gathered my things for my shower, careful not to make too much noise. As I exited my room, I heard a soft snore coming from the other room. Good. He was sleeping.

My shower was quick and quiet. I had three hours to spare before the workshop. I had too much energy so I figured I could spend it cooking everyone breakfast. I put on some sweatpants, a long sleeve, and a beanie since I knew it was going to be cold today.

I posted a note on my closed door for Namjoon, letting him know my early whereabouts. Making sure I put on my jacket, I headed towards the main house.

Upon stepping outside, a gush of wind made my beanie almost sail away. I tugged it tighter around my wet hair. The storm was getting closer, but the forecast assured it wasn’t anything to worry about. We just had to take precautions. I ran to the big house, trying to get out of this wind and coldness.

I reached the front door of the main house at record speed. And after entering, I was welcomed with tender warmth. Jungkook must have turned on the ondol before going to bed.

I made my way into the kitchen and was not surprised by the silence that greeted me. It was a good thing Jungkook was the only one sleeping here. He was the world’s heaviest sleeper so he wouldn’t hear any noise—no matter how loud—I would make.

I crossed the kitchen and checked the bed up on the balcony, ensuring Jungkook was fast asleep—he was. I could tell by the light snores coming from the mountain of blankets on top of the bed. I put on my earphones and played music as I worked. I prepped the veggies, started the rice cooker, turned on the coffee pot, and began to cook, making sure to be as quiet as I could.

Eventually, the aromatics must have made their way to House B because halfway into cooking, Yoongi entered through the back door.

“Good morning,” he greeted with a rough voice, his eyes groggy but focused on the ingredients I had on the counter.

I turned off my music and greeted him. “Coffee is ready. It’s decaf. If you want juice, it’s in the refrigerator or I can make a smoothy.”

He nodded his head in approval. “I’ll have coffee. Thank you. What do you need help with?” he asked as he washed his hands and looked towards the stove. “Are you making dakjuk?”

“Yeah. It’s going to be a cold day. I thought it would be good comfort food. I’m also preparing gyeran bap.”

Yoongi inspected my work and gave another approving nod.

During the beginning of the pandemic, I spent a lot of time with Yoongi in the kitchen. With little work to do, I easily got bored. Yoongi, knowing I had an interest in perfecting Korean dishes, offered to teach me. Jin had also taught me a couple of things, but I preferred learning from Yoongi. Jin’s food tended to feel more like fine dining—delicious and extravagant. Yoongi’s felt homey—warm and cozy. Something made solely out of love and adoration.

As Yoongi and I cooked side by side, Jin’s nose also brought him to the main house.

It didn’t take long before the two of them fully took over and brushed me away from the stove. I was a decent cook, but I coulnd't hold a candle to the pair; I didn’t mind stepping away. As the guys took over breakfast, I worked on the smoothies, knowing some of the guys were on a diet for the concerts coming up.

“Smells good,” came a rough and mumbled voice from above.

I walked to the dining table and looked up to the balcony, catching Jungkook’s sleepy face.

“Need help?” he was barely audible by the big yawn that came out.

“We got it. We’ll let you know once it’s ready,” Jin said sweetly. “Go back to sleep.”

Jungkook didn’t need to be told twice. He disappeared back inside his covers.

I went back to the smoothies, smiling at what I had just witnessed. Yoongi looked confused about my smile. “Kooki’s cute,” I explained.

Yoongi had witnessed his youngest brother’s adorable morning state many times, he looked indifferent. “It’s not too cute when it takes hours to wake him.”

Jin and Yoongi began to share stories of their struggles with having to wake up Jungkook.

We were near finishing when I heard the front door open. Only one person other than myself would use the front door rather than the back sliding door.

“Morning,” I greeted as I saw Namjoon enter the kitchen.

His dark, grey hair was a mess and only one of his eyes was opened. He looked dead tired. “Good morning,” I think he said. His voice was too rough to hear clearly.

I had never seen him in this state. “Didn’t get enough sleep?”

His lips were pouty. “It was a long night.”

His voice was too low and rough, I had to really listen in to fully understand him. But it sounded kind of hot.

“Why weren’t you able to sleep?” I asked, concerned…but also wanting to continue hearing this tone in his voice.

He mumbled something, but I didn’t quite hear the last part.

“What?” I asked, getting closer to him.

He shook his head slightly, irritated at himself. “My voice is bad. Little sleep.” He walked over to where the water was and poured himself a glass.

I instinctually followed. “Perfectly fine.” I waited for him to be in the middle of gulping water before I said the next thing. “You sound kind of sexy.” I put on my flirty voice when I said this and scooted closer to him, bumping him with my hip.

He stopped drinking and began to cough, water spilling out.

He was too easy. His face turned a slight shade of red embarrassment.

Last night had thrown me for a loop and confused the hell out of me, but I wanted to continue being playful with him.

He shook his head. “You like to watch me struggle.” He let out a cough, but smiled, nonetheless.

“No, I mean it: you sound sexy. Why would I lie?” I looked him right in the eye. All jokes aside, I wanted him to know that he was attractive despite him not thinking of himself as such.

Before he had a chance to answer, Jin called out his name.

We both turned, equally surprised. We had forgotten we weren’t alone.

“If the two of you could take a pause in the flirting, could you please see if the others are awake? Breakfast is almost ready.”

Yoongi let out a loud chuckle as he turned off the stove.

Namjoon turned a slight shade of pink but obeyed his hyung and left to wake the others.

“Jungwah!” Jin called out to the youngest.

“Ah,” came a muffled noise from upstairs.

“Food!”

“Mmmmm.”

Jin, Yoongi, and I placed the food at the table so everyone could serve themselves. Jungkook stumbled down the staircase.

Namjoon appeared a few minutes later with the remainder of his brothers.

The eight of us enjoyed a nice, short breakfast. The talk was small and mostly centered on the work for today and what would be having for lunch and dinner. I swear, these boys could eat a whole cow and still think about their next meal.

An hour before work was to resume, I excused myself, and let the guys know I still needed to prepare. As I got up to leave, I felt my head was a little warm, so I took off my beanie.

“Maya!” Namjoon’s alert sound made me worried.

He looked almost horrified as he looked at my head, and I began to touch it. Was there something on me? “What?”

“Did you come here right after showering? And you’re about to step out in the cold again with wet hair?”

I let out a groan of annoyance. “I don’t know how even after this pandemic you still believe in that old wife’s tale. Colds are viruses that are caught from other people—not your skull.”

“Are you insulting my ancestors’ methods?” He was trying to be playful, but I could tell he was irritated with me.

I used the same playful tone. “Namjoon, I’m going to call your mother and demand to see that IQ score myself—I question its validity a lot of times. The silly things you think of….”

“Hey, it’s not silly,” Hobi interfered. “You could get sick if you go out in the cold after showering.”

We had had this argument before. Last year around wintertime, I got scolded by all of them multiple times when they saw me with wet hair. I was good at biting my tongue with the older women in my family who still went through life believing in old health methods, but these guys were my age. I couldn’t let it go.

“Here,” Namjoon said, taking off his thick and heavy jacket.

“I don’t think—” I began to argue.

He shut me up by throwing the jacket on top of me, the impact making me stumble backward.

The guys let out a laugh, watching me almost fall.

“Kim Namjoon be careful! She’s small!” Yoongi scolded.

I felt warm hands keeping me steady, the heavy jacket coming off me. Namjoon’s sweet dimples were the first thing I saw. He let out a nervous laugh. “Sorry.”

I smacked his arm. “The insult did not warrant an assault. Use your words, man.”

He let out a laugh but then placed the jacket on me again, this time more gently. But then he turned me around roughly, shoving me towards the door.

“You’re lucky I like it rough,” I shot at him, shooting him a coy smile.

A combination of hoots, laughter, and groans erupted from the kitchen table as I walked out.

~~~~

It was past lunchtime when the workshop ended. We managed to create two verses and a chorus from the music I had composed. With some tuning, I could see potential in the song. Still feeling enough energy, I decided to start a small meal for everyone.

We had a three-hour break before the next workshop started. Everyone used their break differently. Some went to their rooms to unwind, others went to the gym, Yoongi and Jin came to assist in the cooking, and Tae watched us.

Like this morning, I started lunch, but they finished it. I took on a less complex dish: a salad. After prepping the salad, I started on the vinaigrette. I saw the back sliding door open and Hobi enter, his phone in hand. I was positive he had been talking to his girlfriend.

“What are you making, noona?” came Jimin’s voice. He had just come out of the gym with Namjoon behind him. Jimin took a seat on a stool and watched me work.

“Salad,” I said.

Jimin made a face as I heard Namjoon let out a groan.

“Isn’t this supposed to be a place to relax?” asked Hobi with a teasing smile, closing his phone.

“No one wants a salad,” Namjoon voiced at the same time, shaking his head.

I felt betrayed by my two best friends. The jerks. I made a face pretending to be offended.

Yoongi went on cooking, paying no one any mind.

Thankfully, I had at least two allies.

Jin was the first to speak up, “It will be a good balance for the meal. We have a concert coming up. We’re supposed to be watching what we eat. This is no time off.”

Tae walked over next to me with a beautifully kind look on his face. “I like noona’s salads. She makes the best ones. Always flavorful—you wouldn’t even know it was healthy,” he said, looking directly at Namjoon and Jimin with a chiding look for having spoken rudely to me.

Finally, Yoongi said something. “He’s right. She makes really good salads.”

Jin gave a small snort. “I mean, it’s really not hard to make a salad,” Jin countered.

I snapped my head towards him, my knife at the ready.

Tae also turned to Jin, looking dismayed.

Jin began to laugh at our overreactions.

Tae continued being Tae. “I am disappointed in you, hyung. Where are your manners?”

Jin continued laughing but he bowed his head comically at me and apologized.

I put down my knife but made a motion as if I was about to throw a punch at him.

Tae held me back comically.

There was laughter in the room.

I could hear Jungkook's enthusiasm enter the room. “Fight! Fight! Fight!”

Jin put up his arms in front of him, pretending he was ready to box. “Come at me, bro.”

I sent a kick in the air in his direction.

“There’s no need to be violent, Mayahuel,” Namjoon said to me.

My “violence” turned to Namjoon at hearing my full first name come out of his mouth.

Taehyung made a hissing sound and shook his head. He knew it had been a bad move by his hyung.

“What did you just call me?” I demanded.

Hobi was laughing at Namjoon. “Namjoonie, run!”

I dashed towards Namjoon and he took Hobi’s advice and ran.

He went towards the back of the couch and I followed.

Namjoon and I went around the living room a couple of times. He was too big to navigate through the living room swiftly and not a fast runner either. Thankfully, I was smaller and had long legs. I jumped over the coffee table with ease.

Namjoon looked a little shocked at how fast I got to him.

I rammed my body into him—bless him, he entertained me—and let his body fall onto the couch. While I was short and somewhat athletic—I boxed, hiked, and biked—Namjoon could totally snap me like a twig. If he had wanted to, he could have caught me mid-air and swung me over his shoulder quite easily.

The image immediately popped in my brain, followed by him tossing me onto a bed and him crawling over my body—with those dragon eyes he had yesterday. I could picture his muscular arms trapping me beneath him.

I tried to brush away the fantasy, but goddamn it, did it feel good to imagine it.

A noise sounding like a groan took me away from my thoughts and I remembered I was now on top of Namjoon on the couch. I had my arms around his back. I didn’t want to feel awkward, so I quickly let go and began to fake punch him. Yes, this is the kind of thing best friends did. They beat each other up. It didn’t look awkward at all…I hoped.

“Hey!” Namjoon exclaimed then grabbed me by the waist. Those hands of his felt warm on me even though I had a sweater on.

The next thing I knew, Namjoon had taken hold of my hand and trapped my lower body between his thighs. He sat up and maneuvered me underneath him. He was literally straddling me. Shit, my thoughts went into overdrive at seeing him like this.

But then he started to tickle me and my dirty thoughts were gone. I was too busy trying to catch my breath and get out of his reach.

“Na-joo,” I managed to let out. “Gerroff!”

But he didn’t. He kept going, laughing at my torture.

I kicked the air, not being able to reach high enough to kick him off me. He had me pinned down very well. Suddenly, I felt skin on skin. His fingers had gone underneath my sweater and were now on my bare stomach.

Everything went still. His fingers, my breathing, time. He had realized I was naked underneath this sweater—well, I had a bra on but no shirt. Our eyes met one another but we said nothing. I don’t know how long we stayed like that, staring at each other. But all the emotions I had been feeling for him lately became more intense. And the suspicion that he might like me too was now more evidently true. Why would he look just as shocked as I felt? Why would his fingers stay lingering above my belly button, making the tiniest circles on my skin? I was positive he was feeling my fingers against the back of his arms, digging into him.

I suddenly heard a gasp coming from somewhere and I remembered where we were. I made a fake laugh as if we were still playing around and pushed Namjoon off me. I really didn’t want us to have an audience for this moment.

Namjoon hadn’t anticipated my move, so he naturally fell to the floor with a thud.

I gave him a light kick. He had snapped out of it as well and now pretended to be wounded as he let out a wail.

“And don’t call me by my full name again,” I warned. I kicked him again.

I was anticipating having six pairs of eyes on us when I turned around. What I hadn’t foreseen had been the Cheshire smiles. I now understood it all. They knew. They all knew. And had never tried hiding it. I was just too stupid to see it—or too in denial.

Hobi was closest to me, so I took out my irritation mostly on him. “What?” I smacked him in the arm and began to head back to my salad.

I didn’t want any of them to answer, but it had been an instinctual reaction on my part.

All of them, though, felt compelled to answer. I received different answers.

“Are you mad because we interrupted?”

“Did you guys want us to leave the room?”

“Don’t mind us—continue on.”

“Noona, you looked comfortable on top of Namjoonie-hyung.”

“What’s going on in that house?”

“What’s going on between the two of you?”

Before either Namjoon or I could tell them to fuck off, there was a rattle on the front door. Hobi and Jin didn’t disappoint when they jumped back as if they were in a horror movie.

We all turned to the front door and heard the noise again.

“Must be Hyowon,” Namjoon said as he hurried to answer the door.

A few seconds later, we could hear voices coming from the entrance and saw Pdogg make his way to the living room. He had arrived for the workshop that was taking place in a few hours.

We all exchanged pleasantries and offered him a drink. No more than ten minutes later, the food was ready and we all gathered around the table and island.

I was grateful Pdogg had arrived when he did and that the guys didn’t bring up in front of him any teasing towards myself and Namjoon. Of course, they weren’t going to allow anyone outside of us to think there was something going on between one of their members and me. They might be little shits but they were also respectful and cautious.

During the meal, I found myself stealing little glances at Namjoon, trying to get a feel of how he felt about what had happened and if my suspicions of him having a crush on me were valid. In more than a handful of times, I caught his eye, and rather than look away in embarrassment, he would send me a smirk.

I needed a drink.

~~~~

The workshop went fine. All of us were professionals and worked hard on the song.

Before the workshop, we had put some meat in the oven for slow cook and it was nice and ready for us when we were done. Hyunseo was tired after the long drive, hard work, and heavy meal. He wanted enough rest before tomorrow morning’s workshop.

Once Pdogg left, Yoongi went to the alcohol. “Who wants makgeolli?” asked Yoongi as he took out the bottle and then some small, shallow bowls.

All of us made our way to the third oldest.

“Is there soju?” asked Taehyung.

Yoongi took out five different bottles, allowing Tae to choose which he wanted to drink.

“I’ll have soju, too.” While makgeolli was one of my favorites, I wanted something to kick the edge. I had a feeling the guys were going to bring up what happened between me and Namjoon and I wanted to have enough alcohol in me to not take it so seriously.

We all gathered around the living room and had several rounds of drinks while we played karaoke and board games. Once we got tired of physical activity, we relaxed around the table, feeling exhausted from the long day.

Eventually, the talk led to questions of confessions. This is what typically occurred when we had way too many drinks. Because the guys knew most of each other’s secrets, they gained up on me. Over the years, the closer we became, they saw me more as an equal instead of an older sister they had to show full respect to, which was why their questions became more forward.

“Be honest Maya; is there one of us you ever had a crush on?” Yoongi gave me a suggestive smile as he looked at me and then let his eyes wander towards Namjoon.

I knew where the little shit was doing, but I was going to make sure he regretted asking me the question. “Do you really want to know?”

“Yes!” came from several of the guys, Yoongi being the loudest.

Namjoon was to the right of me. He hadn’t been one of the ones who answered, but I could tell from the corner of my eye his full attention was on me. His makgeolli was sitting on the table, not having been touched in a while. He was ensuring he didn’t get drunk.

I took another sip of the soju. “I’ve had sex dreams of one of you guys for some years.”

I was sure Hyunseo heard the commotion coming from these men.

“Is it hot sex? Or sad sex?” Tae asked eagerly.

I could feel Namjoon’s body tense up a little.

Thankfully, the soju was keeping me relaxed. “Typically, it’s angry sex. But it’s not really him I’m having sex with but his stage persona.”

“Oh! Can I guess?!” Jimin looked like he was in school with his hand raised in excitement.

I nodded.

“Yoongi-hyung?”

Yoongi made a sound of disgust while the rest became quiet as they waited for my answer.

I nodded.

The cheers and laughter could probably be heard by the entire neighborhood now. Yoongi’s disgust was probably the loudest.

He looked so uncomfortable. “Why would you admit that?!”

My sides hurt from laughing so hard. “You—asked,” I barely let out.

“No, no, no! I asked if you had a crush on one of us! I did not want to hear about your filthy dreams!”

His annoyance only made us laugh harder.

“So you liked him once?” asked Jin, wanting Yoongi to continue feeling uncomfortable.

I shook my head no. “No, never. His Agust D persona would just pop up in my dreams. He looks really fucking hot when he looks pissed and sticks his tongue out. And when Deachwita was released…I think I woke up in sweats for a week.”

As I said all of this, I ignored Suga’s pleading hajimas.

“You didn’t know this, Hobi?” asked Jimin.

Hobi shook his head. “I don’t ask her these questions.”

Jimin then turned to Namjoon. “Namjoona, did you know?”

He wasn’t laughing as hard as the others, but he was grinning ear to ear with a certain glint in his eyes. He gave a nod to Jimin. “She told me a couple of weeks after Daechwita was released. Anytime Suga pokes his tongue against his cheek, she’s reminded of it. She said in the dream he would—”

He didn’t get to finish it because Yoongi had thrown one of the pillows at his face. “I don’t want to play this game anymore! The night is over.”

He started to usher everyone out of the living room.

“Oh, stop being such a square,” I said as he pushed me towards the front door. “I’m the one who had the wet dreams. I can’t even see that music video without—”

“Out! Or I will not cook anymore!” He opened the door and gave one last shove.

I was now standing in the windy outdoors. The storm had picked up and the rain was going to start shortly, judging by the moister in the wind.

Yoongi grabbed Namjoon by the sweater and shoved him outside after me. “You both leave. Go have a make-out session or dry hump. Do something to get that image out of your minds so that dream stops. Eck!”

The door was slammed quite ferociously behind Namjoon.

While it was all comical, the cold wind was making me prioritize my state of being. Namjoon and I hurried over to the house. It wasn’t until we were safely inside that we were in a fit of laughter. I clutched my stomach once the cramps got too intense. Namjoon had to clutch a chair to keep from falling.

“We’re never going to tell him it was Cici who had those dreams,” I said in between my laughter.

This only caused Namjoon to start developing tears. All he could do was nod in agreement.

The truth was I had never had dirty dreams of Yoongi; it had been my former group member who had admitted to me her filthy fantasies of Yoongi. For years, I kept the secret, but I finally couldn’t hold it and admitted this to Namjoon shortly after Daechwita was released. We had laughed as hard then as we were now.

We slowly started to calm ourselves down as we made our way inside the back house.

Namjoon wiped away the tears coming down his eyes. “You’re an evil woman.”

I walked over to the kitchen and got some water. “He’s going ignore me all of tomorrow. He might not serve me any alcohol for the rest of our stay here,” I said with a pout. I wasn’t a drunk, but I loved having a good drink every now and then. It would suck if I couldn’t have another sip again during the stay.

“It’s a good thing I brought these,” Namjoon said as he placed down two sojus.

I felt an elated joy had taken over. I reached for one of the bottles and drank from it. As soon as I got a sweet taste of it, the words just slipped out of my mouth. “I love you.”

There was a moment of stillness.

It wasn’t as if it was the first time I had uttered these words to him. I had said them to him a handful of times in different situations throughout the years: when each of us had been low, after receiving a memorable gift from him, while teasing each other, departing from each other physically, and numerous times through text and letters. But all those times were before I realized my emotions for him had developed into something more intense.

It was difficult to believe the last 24 hours had changed things so much. My feelings for him were growing. It wasn’t a crush anymore. It was something richer now—more intense.

And judging by the dragon eyes looking down at me, it seemed I wasn’t alone in this.

I could feel a slight panic creeping its way.

“Mai?” His deep and soothing voice brought goosebumps.

“Mmm?” I asked, taking another sip of the soju. I didn’t trust myself to turn to him just yet.

“We need to talk.” He was closer.

I took a breath, bracing myself. “Ok,” I breathed out.

“Let’s sit first.” He took a step back and motioned towards the living area. The kitchen table and island were covered with each of our work materials, we would have to move elsewhere.

Before taking a step forward, he took the soju from my hand and replaced it with a glass of water. I frowned at the action.

“I’d rather both of us be sober for this if you don’t mind,” he said softly.

I nodded and walked over to the living room with water in hand. I took the corner seat of the long couch, sitting with both my legs crossed.

He took a seat on the other end and let out a shaky breath. He rubbed his hands together, a habit he did when overthinking or nervous. It was noticing his nerves that gave me the courage to want to look him in the eye. I didn’t want my nerves to make things more uncomfortable for him. But as my eyes landed on his face, I noticed he wasn’t looking at me, but his own unsteady hands. I instantly brushed away my own worries and focused on him.

I took one of his hands between my own two, hoping to calm him.

His head came up, an unease look on his face.

It was my awareness kicking in again. I knew what he was feeling. Whether it was because of his touch or the look on his face or the energy radiating from him, I don’t know, but I knew. He had figured it out before I had—how long ago, I had no idea. But that didn’t matter at this very moment. What mattered was for us to openly acknowledge it.

“So last night we crossed a line,” he started off. “At first, I thought it was just teasing, but…clearly it was flirting. Legit flirting.”

I nodded.

“And then this morning—all day long—there have been looks and more flirting.” As he said this, I thought of the small moments where we did steal glances, touched each other for no good reason, and consistently stayed in close proximity. The massage, the couch, the moment alone here last night in the kitchen. “Something has changed between us,” he repeated. “I thought it was only me who felt this…but I can now see you feel it, too.”

There was a silence before I spoke, mostly because I wanted to be sure I worded my thoughts right and partly because I was scared of how badly this could ruin our friendship. “I thought if I kept it quiet, maybe it would pass, but it’s only intensifying,” I said, never feeling more exposed than I did now. I had been open with him before about my private thoughts and emotions. He may be the person I trusted more than anyone but allowing myself to be vulnerable was always going to make me feel uncomfortable. “I’ve had a crush for a long time but it’s always come in waves. It’s never intense or lasts long. But this time it’s different. It’s not going away and it’s getting deeper.” I held his eyes and said the words I had been needing to for a while. “I really like you. And it’s kind of scaring me.”

There was a silence between us as my words hung in the air. I could feel so many emotions radiating from the two of us—I wasn’t sure who was feeling what, but the emotions were strong enough to make us stay still for a moment. We needed to gather our thoughts for a bit.

It was Namjoon who was more put together before I was. He scooted closer, our knees now touching. I felt his hand on my cheek and his finger brushing something wet off me—I had been crying. His cocoa eyes held mine for a moment before he spoke, “I don’t know if it was because I was being a coward or thought it was a phase, but once I knew I liked you more than a friend, I hid it. The guys picked up on it, but I would dodge the question or deny it because I didn’t think you felt the same. I didn’t want to ruin the friendship, so I shut my mouth. But now…”

There was another long pause. We remained seated, holding hands.

“Now what?” I finally asked.

His thumb began making circles around the top of my hand. “Depends entirely on you. What do you want?”

Things were a little too heavy for a little too long. I was taking this seriously, but I also wanted to lighten the mood. It was in my nature. “I want to kiss. A lot.”

His dimples emerged. “And after that?”

“I’m not opposed to doing what Yoongi suggested,” I said brazenly but made sure there was a hint of teasing in my voice.

He chuckled. “Making out or dry humping?”

“Yes,” I answered.

“To what? Making out or dry humping?” He asked again.

“Yes,” I repeated.

“Which one?” He let out a laugh.

“Yes!”

“Which one are you saying ‘yes’ to?!”

“Yes!”

He then understood what I was saying. He was so slow sometimes. “‘Yes’ to both?”

“Yes! God, you’re dumb.”

He lunged at my stomach before I could react, tickling me as I fell on my back trying to wiggle away.

The picture was the same as earlier, except for one key difference. No one else was present to interrupt us.

I struggled with pushing him off me as I lay under his massive body. He had overpowered me and I couldn’t move my legs. I placed my hands against his chest and gave him light slaps.

The light in the room allowed me a full view of Namjoon’s facial features. His smiling eyes, his deep dimples, and his full, inviting lips. Fuck, he was tempting.

And then my body reacted. The craving was too powerful. My fingers wrapped around his shirt and I tugged, pulling him down to me.

His body reacted to mine. One of his hands was placed next to my head on the couch, steading himself so he wouldn’t crush me—not that I would mind his weight on me. His other hand wrapped on my neck, his thumb rubbing my cheek. His thick lips came closer.

It must have been hours since he had applied his cologne, but I still got a scent of the smokey and leather fragrance. His natural fresh, woodsy scent mixed well with the cologne. Not to mention the muskiness he had accumulated throughout the day. I had always been aware of Namjoon’s scent but not in this proximity. It was a little intoxicating.

I reached up, filling the gap that separated us. His lips were ready for mine.

A low groan came from behind his Adam’s apple. My hands lifted from his shirt and climbed to his neck, pulling him closer to me, begging to hear that sound again.

I felt his tongue brush my lower lip lightly and then moved up, parting my lips. As soon as my mouth opened, I let out a gasp. I could taste the tangy and woody spice flavor of the makgeolli he had been drinking earlier. It felt amazing on his lips.

My fingers came to his scalp and I pulled him even closer, quickly noting how I enjoyed his heavy weight on me.

Sadly, his body didn’t agree and he began to pull away. I was sure he was worried about crushing me. But I couldn’t give two shits. He could crush me—I’m sure I’d enjoy every bit of it. My body instantly missed him and tried to keep him where he was. My arms wrapped around his shoulders and my neck stretched up. Unfortunately, he was stronger and managed to pull his body straight up. His breathing was heavy, his face looked flushed.

I sat up as well and I was sure I looked just as disheveled as he did.

It took a while for the two of us to steady our breathing.

I was the first to speak. “I don’t know if it’s the soju or the kiss, but I’m glad I was on the couch for that. Otherwise, I probably would have fallen from the dizziness.”

A smile tugged at his lips. “This is why I wanted you to get some water in you. I did not want our first kiss to be a drunk one.”

“Is that why you always kept me from getting too drunk? Were you hoping every time we were together it would lead to this?” I gave him a flirtatious smile.

“That was a part of it,” he answered honestly. He leaned in and brushed his lips against mine again. It was a different kiss than the other one, sweeter but equally consuming.

When he pulled away, I let out a little whine. “Do your lips have to taste so good? I’ve told you before I’m a sucker for the big, juicy ones.” I reached up to give him another peck, unable to contain myself. It was strange how I was finding this so easy to do.

His fingers wrapped around my hair. “Serves you right for having this hair. Every time I see it, I want to wrap my fingers around it.”

I frowned. “You said you preferred straight hair.”

“That was before I started liking you. Now, my type is someone with mocha skin, curly hair, and legs I want to climb on.” He leaned over and brushed his lips lightly against the crook of my neck.

I felt my face flush in embarrassment. While I felt comfortable taking compliments on my looks (I had been in the public eye for almost half my life), it was always different when I heard a compliment from Namjoon. Whether the comment was on my looks or my talents, praise from Namjoon felt more intimate. It was the way he held eye contact when he said it. Those cocoa irises always held honesty, which made his words more convincing. It was the writer in him, I think, that made everything he said poetically. And the songwriter in me was a sucker for it.

“I apologize if my words are a little too much.” He took my silence and look to think he was making me feel uncomfortable.

I shook my head. “It’s not that. It’s that…it’s going to take some getting used to. I’ve heard it from others about how I look, but not from you. It’s a bit strange…but I like it. Just have to get used to it.”

We continued talking way into the night, a few pecks were stolen here and there. There was a little cuddling, but nothing too steamy. I knew how Namjoon worked. He was a true Korean man in the sense that he liked to take things slow—he was a gentleman. He wasn’t the type to wait long months before sleeping with a girl, but I would be lucky if he caved before we left the soop. I had always been the type to be ready to jump into bed after a few dates. This was going to be quite different than what I was used to. And I imagined he felt the same.

After learning it was past 2AM, we decided to head to bed. We had another long day ahead of us with two long workshops. I still had some planning to do and knew I had to show up for breakfast to keep the guys from gossiping.

“So, how are we going to handle this with the guys tomorrow?” I asked as we climbed the stairs to get to our bedrooms.

“How do you want to handle it?” he asked, giving me the opportunity to voice my thoughts.

“They’re your brothers. I’ll follow your lead.” We came to the front of my room. I really didn’t care if the guys found out during this trip or not. I knew by the time we left we would be telling them. I found it highly unlikely for us to keep this secret for longer than a week.

Namjoon thought for a moment. “I think we should focus on the songwriting. We have a lot of work to do. I know once we tell them, it’ll be nonstop teasing.”

I nodded. “They’re little gossip queens, for sure.”

“I say we bring it up right before we leave.” He reached over, his hand going into my hair once again while his thumb caressed my cheek. “If that’s ok with you.”

I nodded.

He leaned down, claiming my lips again.

Being completely barefoot only made me shorter than this tall, gorgeous man. I had to go on full tiptoes to reach his lips. “I preferred the couch.” I wrapped my arms around his shoulders to keep him from getting away from my reach.

He wrapped his arms around my waist and lifted me up. “This feels good to me.” He brushed his lips against mine once more.

After several more pecks, he placed me back on the ground and we said our goodnights.

I went over to the bed, an intense amount of different emotions going through me. What the hell was happening????

MASTERLIST

Chapters: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 - 18 - 19 - 20 - 21 - 22 - 23 - 24 - 25 - 26 - 27 - 28 - 29 - 30

#bangtan sonyeondan #bts #bts fanfic #rm #rm x reader #friends to lovers #latina #InTheMiddleOfTheNight #eventual smut #Spotify

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dari-ede · 2 years ago

Text

In the Middle of the Night: Chapter 19 (M)

Chapter 19: "Cosas que yo no busqué"

Chapters: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 - 18 - 19 - 20 - 21 - 22 - 23 - 24 - 25 - 26 - 27 - 28 - 29 - 30

MASTERLIST

Pairing: Idol!RM/Namjoon x OFC

Genre: Friends to Lovers, Fluff and Smut

Rating: M (sexual scenes)

Status: COMPLETE

Trigger warning: mention of sexual assault (nothing graphic) Warning/spoiler: explicit sex, bathroom sex, cream pie, fluff

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

-Early November-

“How did you get stuck having to gather everything up?” I asked, picking up a couple of bottles from the floor.

Namjoon and I were the only ones in the practice room. I had walked in just as the other guys left, laughing and giggling as they looked back at Namjoon as he cleaned up the room.

“Penalty,” Namjoon said simply as he picked up a chair. He tried prompting it against the wall, but it slid quickly onto the floor, making a loud noise. “Shit,” he mumbled as he scrambled to pick it up but ended up knocking over the other chairs. A sigh was let out.

“Only you?” I continued to gather things off the floor, trying not to laugh at Namjoon’s clumsiness.

“Taehyung also lost.”

“Why did he leave then?”

Namjoon shrugged. “Somehow I ended up being the only one having to carry the penalty.”

I let out a laugh, taking a good guess as to how Taehyung got out of a punishment. “You guys would let that boy lead you off a cliff. He has you all wrapped around his finger.”

“And you included,” Namjoon said with a playful smile. “Did you forget the reason why you’re presenting at the Awards is that he convinced you?”

Deciding not to respond, I helped Namjoon organize the chairs. The faster everything got cleaned, the faster we could get out of there.

But then he openly laughed at me.

I punched him lightly. “Do you want to pick food first or get it delivered?”

He smoothed his arm where I had hit him, pretending it hurt. “Delivery.”

I took my phone out to look through the menu as we headed out of the practice room.

“And just making sure, you’re completely free now, right?” he asked.

“Yes. Everything in my apartment is packed,” I said.

I was set to leave for Los Angeles in a few days. I was going to be gone for close to three months and during that time my apartment was set for some necessary renovations. Thankfully, my rental came fully furbished so I didn’t have much personal property. My personal property would be in storage while I was gone, meaning there were many boxes in my apartment. My home was slowly turning into a maze, making things more stressful. Namjoon had picked up on my stress, noticing my anxiety traits, I'm sure, and insisted I stay the night at his place to help take my mind off the chaos.

“So you’re all mine tonight?” he asked, the corners of his mouth turning up.

I gave him a nod.

He leaned in and gave me a kiss on the side of my forehead.

As we got closer to the elevator, my phone rang. My manager’s name came on display. If it was anyone else, I would have sent the call to voicemail. I turned to Namjoon, giving him an apologetic look. “It’s Ky.”

“Go ahead,” he encouraged, holding the elevator door open for me. “I’ll get our things from the studio and meet you downstairs.”

I stepped into the elevator. As Namjoon pressed his studio’s floor button and the parking lot button, I answered the call. “Hey, Ky.”

“Hey, am I catching you at a bad time?” came a voice from the other end.

“No, I got a bit of free time. What’s up?”

“I got some good news.”

“I’m all ears.”

The elevator door opened; we arrived at Namjoon’s floor. He gave me a wink as he walked out, creating butterflies in my stomach.

“We’re making progress with the labels. They’re asking for meetings with you. I told them you have a small window later this month and we could squeeze them in.” He sounded excited. For three years he’d been pushing me to sign so I could release more music. Now that I had given in, he was like a kid in a candy store.

The elevator doors opened and I made my way over to the company vehicle. The driver and I greeted each other after he opened the door for me.

“How many have you been in talks with?” I asked curiously after I whispered to the driver that Namjoon would be down in a bit.

“Many.” Even through the phone, I could see Ky’s wide smile. He was proud. “I’m getting baskets sent to my office. I got floor seats to the Clippers, man.”

“You have seasonal tickets already,” I reminded him.

“Yeah, but these are free floor seats.”

I rolled my eyes. Ky lived a very comfortable life but he was still incredibly frugal. “Can we go back to me, please?”

Ky began to go over my availability for the month to meet with the label representatives. He confirmed my list of necessities for my contract and salary.

Just as we were wrapping up, I asked a question I realized I still hadn't. “Ky, what labels are you wanting me to meet with?”

“I’m still going over them. I’ll let you later which ones I think are the best ones.” He was lying. Not only because of the statement he had said earlier to me, but because I had known him for too long to know when he was lying to me or dodging something.

“Kyungsoo,” I said with a tone that told him to come clean with me.

He let out a sigh and listed the labels. The first two were impressive, considering they were major labels. The third label was more independent but reputable. All three were promising. But the last one was the one that I took issue with: it was my old label. “Ky, I said I didn’t want to go back to them.”

Ky’s voice became more gentle, trying to do damage control. “I know, I know. And I’m not even considering them—”

“Then why have a meeting with them?” My hands shake at the thought of being in a meeting with the representative I was sure my old label would send.

“It’s common courtesy, Mayita.” He was using my family nickname to soothe me. “They were with you for years and we had a great relationship with them. They treated you incredibly well.”

“Because I made them, Ky. I was their most successful artist. Before me, they were nothing.” I didn’t mean to sound like a snob; it was a knee-jerk reaction.

Ky didn’t respond. He was letting me go through my emotions—whatever they were. He knew I had an issue with going back to that old label but didn’t know the reason why. No one other than Tia Jia knew. And if I was being honest, I didn’t see myself telling anyone else the truth. Especially Ky.

I let the anger and resentment sit with me for a moment. I marinated in it and allowed myself the right to feel bitter and angry at a company I was positive knew the truth about the fucker who had assaulted me. I had promised myself long ago that I would never walk into that building again. And that I was done with every person in that company. When I felt my anger settle down, I took a breath. “Sorry. I sounded like a snob saying that.”

“I know you didn’t mean it,” he assured me. “And you know I am always here for when or if you ever want to talk. I’m not sure what happened, but I’m hoping that you’re at least open to letting them present for you. You could even call the shots on who is in that meeting.”

I couldn’t do that. If I told Ky who I did or did not want in that meeting, he would know who I had an issue with. And then he would start prying. Eventually, I was sure he would find the truth with the smallest bit of information. I knew Ky. It would not be a good thing if he found out. Right now he didn’t have a single piece of the puzzle and I wanted to keep it that way.

“How about at least writing them a formal letter? Or even better, calling them?”

My issues were with the higher-ups in the label. It was logical for me to believe that the top executives didn’t at least have an inkling about the fucker who assaulted me. There was no way I was his only victim. I didn’t know who to trust, so it was safer to meet with no one. Even if it made me look like a bitch.

“No, Ky,” I said with finality. “I’m done with them. I said this already. Please respect that.”

Another sigh. “Ok. I’ll back off.”

“Thank you.” I felt a little calmer because he sounded genuine.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw movement. I checked the time and noticed I had been talking to Ky for quite a while, meaning Namjoon had also been held up. Turning towards the movement, I saw the sweetest and sexiest face making its way to me. Instantly, what little irritation I had drifted away.

“Sorry,” Namjoon called out as he jogged towards me.

“Ky, I’ll call you later,” I said as my eyes stayed on Namjoon so I could continue to feel settled.

“Tell RM I said hi,” Ky said on the other end.

“I will.”

“Before you hang up, though, when are you going to officially tell me the two of you are dating?” There was a smile when he said this.

Instead of feeling worried about Ky finding out, I felt confused. “Who told you?” Had word started to spread about Namjoon and me?

“You just did.” He let out a booming laugh. “I knew it,” he said triumphantly.

He had set a trap for me, and I fell for it. But rather than feeling irritated at myself for falling for something so dumb, I felt relieved that nothing had leaked.

“Does my mom know?" Ky asked. "She does, doesn't she? I can’t believe she kept this from me. How long have you guys been a thing? Do Seb and Vic know?” he asked, referring to my brothers.

“Bye, Ky.” I hung up in the middle of him saying something else.

Upon seeing Namjoon, the company driver made his way around the car to close the door once Namjoon was inside the vehicle.

“What took you so long?” I asked, putting away my phone.

“Hobi wanted me to hear a track he’s working on.” Namjoon settled in the seat next to me.

“How does it sound?” I asked, feeling a little jealous that I hadn't gotten to listen to Hobi's music.

As the guys got ready for the concerts in LA, the tracks for their upcoming album were still being decided by Sihyuk. The plan was for the guys to start recording the selected songs once their time off concluded in January. Hoseok was taking advantage of the “free” time to plan for his mixtape. He was mostly quiet about his music, though, not having shared anything with me. I was feeling pouty at learning Namjoon had gotten a chance to hear something while I still hadn’t. I might have to sneak my way into his studio.

“Different,” Namjoon answered me, a glint of pride in his eyes. “Not what I was expecting.”

The vehicle began to move out of the lot.

“For real?” Curiosity started to brush aside jealousy.

Namjoon nodded, a proud smile across his face, but there was a hint of sadness in his eyes.

“What’s wrong?” I asked, concerned.

“He’s got a whole map of how the mixtape is going to be. He has a whole song almost done and two others he’s working on. A whole notebook full of lyrics and ideas. Meanwhile, I’ve been wanting to release my own music for so long and all I can do is stare at my notes and have no clue what I want to release.” He shook his head in self-disappointment. “I need to buckle down and get it done.”

I fought the urge to reach over to him and physically soothe him but we weren’t alone. I would have to settle for using my words and tone. “Namjoon, the two of you work differently. While Hobi is very hard-working and anal, he sees a vision and goes with it. You, on the other hand, over-analyze. You write a little, go back and edit, write more, edit, research, write, re-edit, call sources to verify your edits, make notes, ask opinions, write again, edit.” I wasn’t exaggerating in my analysis of him but my tone was soft and playful.

It worked because Namjoon’s dimples were all on full display with a slight blush on them.

“It works for you. Your gift of language is on another level. One that most songwriters kill to have. And while your style of writing and releasing music has worked for you, you forget there was another element that made you release so many songs in such a short amount of time—and that was because you had to. You had deadlines before. This time, you really don’t.”

“That’s why I think I need to buckle down,” he interceded. “I was able to do it before. There’s no reason I can’t now.”

“And where did that get you?” I asked, my tone now serious. The softness and teasing had left. I needed him to see the importance of where I was getting at. “It damaged your mental health, got in the way of your happiness, prevented you from having a life outside your career, and made you question your worth outside this industry. You have close to two-hundred songs credited under your name and you're not even thirty yet! It's no wonder you feel drained and exhausted and are struggling with lyrics—you've been squeezed dry.”

He stayed quiet, his eyes staring out as he deeply considered my words.

A part of me felt I might have pushed too much. Namjoon was such a hard worker who loved his craft, but there were times when he needed to put up boundaries and put his health first. He needed to hear this. “I believe stress and pressure are a good thing—they can push us to greatness. However, too many of them can push us off a cliff—either figuratively or literally. And as your friend, I recommend you try not to put so much pressure on yourself. It makes the people who care about you worry.” I did my best in choosing my words, keeping in mind we had an audience.

He turned to me, a longing in his eyes. “I don’t want to put worry on anyone.”

I wished we could get to his house already and be alone. I craved to touch him. “Then, please—I beg of you, try not to over-worry. And try not to over-work yourself. Try to go a few days without working during this time off.”

He let out a sigh. “It’s not as if I do it because I want to. I write so much because I feel I need to,” he admitted.

“Why?” I asked, curiously.

He shrugged. “Maybe I’ve been conditioned to feel this way? By me? Sihyuk? I have expectations as the writer of Bangtan. But then again,” he paused to think, needing to organize his emotions and thoughts properly. “I do lovewriting. It brings me joy. Peace. But I do recognize that maybe the way I’m doing it and the amount I’m doing it for is unhealthy.”

I nodded, agreeing with him.

He continued. “I see you journal a lot. I’ve been trying it myself but can’t seem to like it.”

I let out a laugh unexpectedly. “Do you go back and edit your writing?” I guessed.

He thought for a moment and then it looked like the lightbulb turned on. “I do.”

My laugh continued. “Dummy, you’re not supposed to edit your journal. A journal is for thoughts—recalls of the day’s events or feelings. It’s not meant to be edited.”

He sat there, considering my observation of him.

I had an idea. “One day, just pick up a pencil and paper and write. Don’t go back and reread what you wrote. Let it sit there; maybe put it away so it can be out of sight and out of mind.”

He tilted his head, feeling a little uneasy about the suggestion. “That’s going to be tough,” he admitted, smiling at himself.

“You know what I’ve done in the past?”

“Yeah?”

“I’ve written on a napkin or scrap paper. Then I toss it in the trash without looking at it.”

His eyes looked like they were about to pop out of his head. He was so appalled by me.

I laughed at his reaction.

His own laughter joined in. “That’s too much. Let’s not overdo it. Baby steps, baby steps.”

Our laughter continued as we got to his complex and passed security.

Even after years of friendship, I enjoyed learning something new about Namjoon. It was like I would never fully know everything about him and something about that excited me.

A couple of nights later while I was alone in the maze that was my room—Namjoon was at work according to our many messages—I saw a notification on his social media. He had posted a letter—a short one. Reading, it caused a slight confusion. It was unlike anything he had posted before. There didn’t seem to be a clear string of thought. It read like a diary—as if he was transcribing his thoughts and emotions without worrying about grammar or clarity. He had taken my advice.

My heart squeezed and expanded. I was feeling that more lately.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was the night before my flight. I had spent the day mostly with Namjoon but had informed him I was still planning on sleeping over at my place. We had already spent four nights this week together—I had broken my rule. We had just finished dinner and came back to his place. Namjoon was insisting I stay the night and leave from his place tomorrow. He would ensure I had security with me to go to the airport.

I was slightly offended by this offer, feeling he was questioning my methods of taking care of myself. “I am perfectly capable and have the resources to hire my own security, thank you.”

Namjoon didn’t pick up on the sting, however. He was too far caught up in convincing me. “It’s not just that,” he insisted. “If you leave from here, security is tighter. Plus, journalists expect you to leave your home. Your name has already leaked about you flying out tomorrow.”

He had a good point about that. I was sure there were already cameramen surrounding the entrance to my complex, but I still refused to give in. Especially with his earlier insinuation that I found a little insulting.

Finally, Namjoon picked up on my mood when I refused to look at him. He decided to turn things light. His tone turned to tease. “Why are you acting like this?” He let out a laugh when I turned to him and saw my irritated look. “Is it so bad sleeping over at my place? I try to keep it neat.” He gave a small pout and looked around his place, searching if anything looked too messy.

He actually was trying his best to be neat. His front door area wasn’t a mountain of shoes anymore. I never saw a towel on the floor or too many random objects scattered everywhere. I never made a comment on his messiness, believing it wasn’t my space to have an opinion on. He even had food items in his fridge now! I think after spending several nights at my home and seeing how neat I was, he was being a considerate boyfriend and trying to make me comfortable.

“It’s not that,” I insisted. “It’s just….” I didn’t know how to phrase the real reason why I didn’t want to stay in his home again. We had already spent three nights together this week, more than I had with any of my exes. And the thing was…I didn't see it as a problem. I actually wanted to spend every night with him, but I also feared if we continued this, something bad would occur.

“What?” he pushed gently.

It took a moment to decide to be honest with him. “We spend so many nights together. You’re bound to get tired of me,” I said playfully but with some seriousness.

He firmly shook his head. “Not likely. I like having you around.” His eyes held mine. There was not an ounce of laughter in his voice. The look in his eyes was so soft and inviting.

It made me feel uneasy. I made a joke to diffuse the tension that was building. “You like all the sex, you mean,” I said coyly, giving him a smile.

The dragon eyes slightly appeared, drawing me in for different reasons. “That’s definitely a bonus.” His low tone made its way all the way to my cunt.

When I noticed I was starting to move toward him, I snapped back to my place. I needed to stay on topic. “Employees here are already suspicious. And if security picks me up from here, they’ll add one and one together.”

He let out a sigh, trying to control what I knew to be slight irritation. “And?”

How could he not take this seriously? “What do you mean ‘and’? If it gets leaked to the media that we’re involved—”

He crossed his arms and remained calm. “It won’t come from the employees—they all sign NDAs. If I could, I would show you the document, babe, I swear. No sane person would dare break it. Plus, don’t forget how long Jin and Unnie have been together and her identity has remained a secret. Jin’s number one priority is protecting Unnie. The moment the company fails to keep her a secret, Jin is gone. He made it very clear to everyone and we all believe him. He set the standard when it comes to significant others. We won’t be found out, I promise.”

His term of endearment he had used for me had me swooning. The moment it came out of his lips, I almost forgot what we were discussing. He had called me “baby” previous times in a more off-handed way. This time, his voice had been filled with nectar of sweetness. A sound I had never heard from him.

Looking into those warm brown eyes, my worry faded. “Ok.”

“Ok?” he asked, looking a little hopeful.

I nodded. “Ok. I’ll get escorted tomorrow from here.”

He let out a sigh of relief, his face looking purely elated. “Good.” He filled the gaps that separated us and cupped my face into his large, warm hands. He pulled me up for a honeyed kiss.

I turned into a pool of mush. How the hell had this man convinced me so damn quickly? He was a wizard, I was sure of it.

He pulled away. “Let me make the call.” He took out his phone and stepped into the kitchen.

While he spoke to the staff, I went into his room to make a call of my own.

“Hi, darling,” a light voice from the other end of the call said.

“Hi, Jiji,” I said. “I got a favor to ask.”

“Ask away,” she said without hesitation.

“Could you grab my luggage from my place and bring it over to Namjoon’s place?”

“Spending the night at his place?” she asked a bit curiously.

“Yeah, he’s offering me to stay here to avoid the paparazzi.”

“Oh, yeah they’ve been surrounding the entrance all day.” Jiwoo lived in my community and was a good friend of mine. I wanted to tell her the truth, but still felt it wasn’t the right time. As hard as it was for Hoseok, who was her brother, to keep the secret from her, he respected my privacy and hadn’t told her.

“So can you get it to me?” I asked.

“Sure,” she said. “Wait, how much luggage is it?”

“Just three items,” I said. Thankfully, I traveled light. I had a home I was going back to, so I didn’t need many items. My luggage mostly consisted of presents I was bringing back and some of my equipment. I was lucky that I lived in the same complex as Jiwoo. It made me feel less guilty in asking her for this favor.

As I spoke to her, I scanned Namjoon’s room, noticing small items scattered. My inability to stand still while talking beat the best of me and I started to straighten things up. I gave Jiwoo instructions on what to do with my luggage and how to get it to me, all while I organized things in the bedroom.

I noticed a few hair ties on the side of the bed I slept on and took them over to the bathroom. I looked around the sink to find the best place to keep them. I noticed a small, pretty, yellow container with other hair ties inside. Curious, I walked over to it and noticed the area. Next to the yellow container were a couple of my facial products nicely aligned. There was also a bottle of my lotion and lipstick I thought I had lost last week. I must have forgotten it here.

Taking a step back from the sink, I took in the entire view. The sink looked to be separated as if a couple shared it. On the right were all of Namjoon’s products and on the left were mine. Sure, he had significantly more items than I did, but it still looked like a couple’s sink.

Not knowing how to feel about this, I made my way out of the bathroom. I hung up with Jiwoo and left the bedroom.

Upon entering the living room, Namjoon entered the room. “The car will be here four hours before the flight. Do you want to pick up your luggage now?”

“No, I just called Jiwoo. She’s bringing it to me. Shouldn’t take her more than an hour.”

“Good.” His eyes stayed on me, though, a look of concern starting to form. I was such an easy book for him. “What’s up?”

I didn’t know what I was feeling and knew I had to grasp well my emotions before being honest with him. However, I had to tell him something. “It's flight nerves.”

He nodded, believing me. “You haven’t flown in over two years. Some of us still get jitters before a flight, too.”

I gave a simple nod, not knowing what else to say.

He gave me a smile and walked over to me. “Maybe a bath will soothe you.”

The glint in his eyes made me smile. I put a hand up to his chest, stopping him from getting closer. “If we take a bath, Jiwoo will be waiting for me for a long time.”

He blushed. “True. How about a shower?”

A shower would be quick. “Sure.”

“Ok. I’ll meet you there. I’ll get the wine for afterward. We can watch a movie in bed.” He kissed my head and dashed away, looking cute and ecstatic about the night’s event.

I walked to the shower in the master bedroom and got it started, changing the temperature to my liking. Once it was to my preferred heat, I closed the glass door, allowing the steam to build.

I started to underdress right as Namjoon walked into the room, a bottle of wine and two glasses in his hands. His eyes roamed over me as I took off my last piece of clothing. I made sure to do so slowly, teasing him.

He set down the wine and glasses on the nightstand and hurried over, shredding off his clothes in a hurry.

I let out a laugh. “You act as if you haven’t seen me naked a hundred times.”

“It always feels like the first, baby,” he said as he pushed down his boxers, his long cock bobbing out and standing straight up.

My eyes went directly to it. I could never get over how beautiful and appetizing it looked. A small moan escaped my lips.

“You act like you haven’t seen me naked a hundred times,” he retorted.

I smacked him for his teasing and he in turn smacked my ass lightly. I let out a whimper.

He stepped in front of me and goddamn he was a giant. I was of average height but being barefoot and Namjoon standing at nearly 6 feet and weighing over 170 pounds, I felt like a thin paper doll this close to him. His massive titties were at eye level, I had to bend my neck to look into his brown eyes.

His full, plump lips called out to me. He wasn’t bending down and I got impatient. I wrapped my arms around his bulky shoulders and pushed off the floor. I climbed his huge chest and folded my legs around his middle.

Namjoon let out a laugh as my lips reached his, his body stumbled a little but he quickly regained balance. “Easy,” he cautioned me. He brought an arm under my ass, giving me support.

I clutched tighter against him, loving the feel of his hard body against mine. “You’re so tall. The only way to get to your lips is by climbing you.”

“Climbing me? Am I a tree or something?”

“Yes. My personal, big, tall namu.” I smiled as the word left my lips. Namjoon had referred to himself as namu before (the Korean word for ‘tree’), even though no one else really did. But the word suited him in many ways. Of course, I never meant to say he was my namu, and the realization that I had said it out loud made me blush with embarrassment. I stilled, unsure how he was going to react.

I forced myself to look up at him, wondering how he felt about this sudden label.

Deep dimples and a toothy smile met my sight. “I can be your namu,” he said sweetly.

I could feel my heart flutter. “I’ve never had my personal namu before.”

“You just gotta be sure to water me often,” he said, reaching in to taste my lips.

His playfulness was easing me quickly. “Oh, keeping you well-fed won’t be a problem whatsoever,” I said, one of my hands coming off his shoulder and reaching down between our bodies. “Should I be worried about overdoing it, though?” I took hold of his thick member, feeling the head had some precum. We both groaned in unison.

“I don’t think that’ll be of concern. I require a lot of feeding.” He let out a deep grunt as I rubbed his head against my core, which was wet and ready for him.

I let out a deep moan; I would never be able to be amazed at how great he felt. I loved how fucking long he was. I lined up his head at my opening then let myself descend on him. I had taken him in so many times, my body was getting more used to him and didn’t feel the sting so strongly anymore. My walls adjusted more nicely around him, but it still felt a stretch.

“Shit,” he let out as my walls clasped around him. “I love it when you do that.” He moved over to the shower walls, pressing me against the glass.

The steam of the shower had made the glass hot. So much so that it was stinging my back, but I didn’t care. I rocked my hips, moving up and down, and used his shoulders as leverage. He thrust up, meeting my movements and hitting me deeper. I let out a yelp when he hit a sweet spot. He reached forward and took a tit into his mouth.

His lips sucked on my nipple as he pushed into me repeatedly. I fell roughly against him, grinding down and taking his length, only for him to pull nearly out and fuck himself inside me again. His teeth took my sensitive bud and bit down, making me howl. I clutched to him, scraping his skin, and wishing to be sowed into him. The music of slapping skin and wet sounds filled the room, adding another layer of heat.

His body was pressed on me, his thrusts becoming more erratic. “You almost there, baby?” His mouth moved in between my breasts as his hands took hold of my hips, helping me move up and down his shaft. I was losing my strength.

My arms pulled him closer, crushing him to me. “Little more,” I begged. “Fuck!” I let out as he swept his arms under my thighs and took me from a different angle. Sweet Jesus, that felt good!

His strokes were longer and deeper with this angle. The muscles in his biceps tightened as he held onto my legs. His eyes came down to where we were joined, a deep moan coming out.

I followed his eyes and watched us, too. My red, swollen pussy lips swallowed his long, engorged dick so nicely. I had fucked plenty of dicks, some bigger and longer than Namjoon’s. Some were rougher, some were softer. But for some reason, Namjoon’s just felt the most perfect. It was the right length, had the right amount of roughness to it, and it spilled the perfect amount of cum—it filled my mouth nicely and felt damn sweet as it went down my throat.

Thinking about his cum was taking me over the edge. “Almost there,” I let him know.

“Touch yourself,” he ordered. His voice was rough and strained. I looked up at him to find his dragon eyes had made an appearance. “Now.”

My body shivered and did as I was told, my fingers pushing into my pussy lips to where we were joined.

He let out a low groan. I then felt a warm, long string of spit fall right on my clit.

The action sent me writhing. I rubbed myself at top speed as Namjoon’s strokes made my back hit the glass door with heavier force. He turned his hips slightly, hitting another spot within me. “There! Again!” I wailed out.

He did hit it again. And again, and again, bringing screams out of me.

It was getting harder to keep control. “Please,” I pleaded, rubbing my clit, imagining it was his fingers pushing me into oblivion.

With a final stroke, one that made me see stars, he bellowed, “Now!”

I was shot out of my body and sent to the skies. My legs vibrated from the ecstasy as I felt Namjoon thrust once more into me before I felt him come undone as well. His warm, sweet nectar blasted inside my core.

Still holding me, he stepped closer to me, pressing me fully against the glass. Our juices spilled out of me, sliding down my ass cheeks, and touching my backdoor pecker. The feeling made me tighten around him. I craved more cum to come out of him, out of me.

The overstimulation caused his hips to rock forward, knocking the wind out of me. I clutched to him tighter, a whimper coming out.

“Sorry, babe.” His touch and kisses became soft and gentle. The endearment came from him with the same sweetness as before. “Did I hurt you?” he asked, pulling back a bit to take a look at my face.

I shook my head. “Just sensitive. But it felt good.” I gave him a smile to ease his worry.

“You sure? Was I too rough again?” he asked, thinking about the last time he had left me with a dozen bruises.

I took his mouth into mine, cutting off his worry. “You were perfect. I’m not fragile. If something is too much, I’ll let you know.” I caressed his face in between my hands. “Believe me?”

He gave me a small nod and returned the kiss. His hands made circles around my back, his eyes scanned my body for any discomfort he might have caused.

My body felt warm and tingly for a different reason than arousal. I enjoyed doing the carnal act with Namjoon, but the aftercare was something I had never given importance to until him. He made sure my body was fully at ease and relaxed before he pulled out.

Sure enough, once I felt fully at ease, Namjoon pushed the hair out of my face and gently separated us. “Let’s get you cleaned up, girl.”

His predictable kindness brought a smile to my face.

He opened the door for us and stuck his hand inside to check the water temperature. Right as I took a step into the shower, he let out a curse and pulled me back. “Shit! That’s hot! Hold on.”

I frowned, not getting the same impression as him. By the steam, I knew the temperature it was. I pushed my hand forward to check the water. It felt nice.

His hand instinctively reached out to pull mine back.

I turned to him, confused. “It’s perfect.”

He looked at me like I was crazy. “It’s burning hot.”

“You think so?” I asked, reaching out and touching the water. “Feels fine to me.”

His look didn’t waiver.

I took a step inside, my eyes never leaving his. I let the water hit my hands and arms first. There was a bit of a sting from the heat, but it was a good kind of sting. My skin quickly adjusted, though. I took another step forward, my chest and stomach catching the water. All the while, my eyes never left his so he could see the pleasure I got from the heat.

He looked at me like I had grown three heads or something.

I let out a laugh. “Haven’t you taken hot showers before?” I asked, letting my hair and back take in the water.

“Not this hot!” he said incredulously from the doorway.

I stepped forward and kissed his pouty lips. “Will you get in here and join me?”

He let out a groan as he stepped into the shower. “You’re gonna be the death of me.”

I giggled, pulling him into my wet body. “Shut up and enjoy it.” I held onto his neck as I continued to kiss him.

He took a step forward, the water hitting him for the first time. He let out a yelp and jumped back. “How can this feel good? Is your name Danaerys or something?”

I continued laughing at his exaggeration when we both heard my phone go off. I had left it on for when Jiwoo let me know she had arrived. From where we were standing, we could see her name come up on my phone’s display.

I started to make my way out of the shower, but he beat me to it. “I’ll go pick it up. You stay and enjoy your volcano shower,” he teased, turning to go.

I gave him a slight shove.

“I’m curious,” he said, heading over to my phone. “If you’re so against anyone finding out about us, don’t you think Jiwoo is going to question why you’re staying over at my place tonight?”

I shook my head. “I’ve stayed the nights at other guy friends’ homes before. She doesn’t suspect a thing.”

He nodded and took my phone. “I’ll be back in a bit.”

As he walked out, I began to enjoy the hot shower.

However, he quickly came back. “Which guy friends have you stayed the night at?” he asked, curiously.

Detecting the smallest amount of jealousy in his tone, made me want to laugh. “Hoseok's and Jackson's.”

He gave a slight nod and stayed standing there, making no move to leave. Finally, he asked. “Not that it matters, but…did you and Jackson ever…?”

The thought grossed me out and it showed on my face. “No.”

He laughed at my reaction. “I thought so; I was always curious.”

“I have a very strict don’t-fuck-guy-friends rule,” I said. “Especially the really good ones.”

Namjoon gave me an unimpressed look. “What about me?”

“You’re the exception,” I immediately answered. “Plus, I’m not just fucking you. I’m dating you. There’s a difference.”

He gave me a wide grin. “I’m the exception?” He looked cocky as shit right now. It just about made me turn to mush.

I rolled my eyes at his sappiness. “Will you go pick up my luggage? Or should I drag you in here and I can go pick it up myself?”

He quickly ran out.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

“The car is almost here,” I said the next day after getting off the phone with the security that was going to escort me to the airport.

Namjoon gave me a sad smile and held me.

I tried not to think about how much I was going to miss his touch for the next week. “I’m planning on having Thanksgiving at my home. Maybe you and the guys can celebrate with us? There’ll be a lot of food.”

“Will your family be ok with that?” he asked genuinely.

“My Tia Jia and brothers like you guys. And I’ll make sure it’s only my immediate family. All my cousins will have to wait for Christmas.” I wanted to take things slow with Namjoon, but something in me wanted Namjoon there for Thanksgiving. It was a dumb, American holiday so it didn’t make any sense why I wanted him there. I just did.

“I’ll go if you want me there,” he said gently as his nose buried in my hair.

I snuggled closer to him, my face wanted to dig into his chest. “This is gonna suck.”

His long fingers traced patterns along my sides. “It’s just ten days.”

We stayed holding each other until I got confirmation my ride had arrived. My luggage was already downstairs with security. I was the only thing missing. Before stepping out of Namjoon's home, he pulled me in for a long kiss. “I’ll be there before you know it,” he promised.

Reluctantly, I stepped out of his home and walked down the hall as a sudden feeling of emptiness took over. How the fuck was I already missing him?

________________

Chapters: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 - 18 - 19 - 20 - 21 - 22 - 23 - 24 - 25 - 26 - 27 - 28 - 29 - 30

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AN: Thank you so much for the likes everyone! You have no idea the excitement I get when I get a notification on this story! It means a lot!

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