#rip Jacob’s hair it would have loved my bisexual ass

[arsonisticscholar]

So.

I’ve officially seen the first two twilight movies

[imlostinsantacarla]

How Jacob will react if he will realise his loved Renemonster was bisexual?

heya hun, thanks so much for requesting this! again, i wouldn’t have been able to put this out without the help of my beta reader: @roslaeahle​ she helped me with a lot of grammar stuff and also helped me with fixing and adding a lot of good lines in, so this piece wouldn’t be like this without her wonderful help! - admin kat 🌙❣

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How Jacob reacts to Renesme being Bisexual:

- First and foremost, I have the need to fix the mess that smeyer created and I’m declaring from the beginning that Jacob Black is like Renesme’s older brother/protector and she’s actually going to be an established teenager/adult when she starts dating other people and comes out to Jacob because I’m not writing anything different.

- I think that half of Jake already knew that she was bisexual, but there’s another half of him that’s just so surprised because of how casually she comes out to him.

- Like they’re sitting in the woods one morning and she just spits it out. He turns his head in her direction so fast it almost pops off, and she’s already looking at him with the most candid panic and fear in her eyes because his opinion and acceptance means the most to her.

- The fact that there’s even an inkling of a chance that he could reject her crushes her heart in ways that no one else would ever understand. His acceptance will make or break her, more than her own parents opinions ever could.

- The look on Renesmee’s face mixed with her crying and shaking like a total mess crumples his heart so ferociously he’s already squashed her into a bear hug.

- He’s smoothing out her hair and just muttering how he’s so proud of her and he’s so honored that she was comfortable enough in telling him and including him in this part of her life.

- Because Jacob’s the purest ball of sunshine and love is love, and he doesn’t care if Renesmee is attracted to boys or girls or both because that’s a part of her and he can’t ever picture himself rejecting her over such a silly, inconsequential thing.

- And we all know that mama bear Bella would kick his ass to hell and back if he didn’t accept her baby girl.

- There’s just no way in hell that Jake’s going to view Renesmee (someone he thinks of as his little sister) any different just because of who she loves. She is literally his best friend and he wants her to be happy and treated with the utmost respect, and he’s damn well gonna make sure that she’s a happy chick, you know?

- But we all know that Eggwart and Alice totally spilled the beans to the rest of the family because those two can’t keep a secret when it comes to our playful little spawn of Bella.

- It doesn’t stop him from returning to the Cullen’s crying his eyes out. Edward is snickering his head off and Bella is left to try and calm down her best pal.

- “Why are you crying? You already knew.” Bella would hum, rubbing his trunk-like arms.

- “I-I kn-know-w-w,” he’d hiccup. Bella’s melting because this is the Jake she wants to be a part of her daughter’s life.

- Every year when it comes to the anniversary of Renesme’s Coming Out Day, Emmett, Bella and Alice, a long with Jasper  (The Sibling Crackhead Trio featuring Yeehaw Hale) spend the whole day reenacting Jacob crying his eyes out like the big ball of mush he is.  As the years go on, Jacob considers ripping them limbg from limb every time the family erupts in laughter at his expense.

- But back to the point…

- Afterwards, Jacob somehow becomes even more protective of Renesmee because he just knows the cruelty and lack of acceptance the world can dish out but like…

- “Jacob, Renesme can literally snap four semi-trucks and yeet them to Mars in two seconds tops… so homophobes? They aren’t gonna stand a chance against our demon baby.” Emmett would state nonchalantly.

- “tHAtS MY DAUGHTER YOU FU-” Bella would scream.

- Not gonna lie, he’s going to panic a lot because Nessy is like his little sister and just like Edgeward, he doesn’t think anyone is good enough to even breathe the same air as her.

- Low key will point at every person around her age and ask if she thinks they’re hot or not. She dies every damn time he does it because Emmett joins in, which makes Jasper and Alice join in… Before you know it, it’s become a family affair and Renesme is dying of mortifying embarrassment every time they go out.

- You bet that Jacob crashes her dates when she begins dating. Edward doesn’t even have time to pay him for it, because he’s running after her once she leaves.

- Jacob ends up learning the hard way (because Bella, Rosalie and Leah all handed him a fresh hot can of whoop ass) that he needs to let her breathe and explore her sexuality and just date?

- And it’s so hard for him just because he doesn’t want her heart broken but unfortunately that’s kinda how you learn in life.

- Besides, Resume is tight as shit. You think Bella would raise a wimp? She not only has a mother who was born to be a vampire but an uncle called Emmett who yeets boulders for a damn living? You’d think Jake would get the message already.

- Jacob totally buys Renesmee her first bi pride flag and she’s sobbing because it’s her actual eighteenth birthday and she can’t believe he did this for her.

- Now it’s Jake’s turn to calm her down.

- He takes her to her first pride parade and he’s so overwhelmed with happiness because she’s making new friends and has this whole community that is so open and loving.

- please i’m actually sobbing now.

- He’s going to seem intimidating when Renesmee brings her boyfriend or girlfriend to meet the family.

- “I swear to God, if you break her heart I’ll make sure you have nightmares for the rest of your damn life.” Jacob would spit lowly, only for Esme to jab him in the ribs.

- And he’s there for her during her first break up, hugging her and wiping away her tears. He will always be there for her, picking up the pieces and helping her get back together. He fuels her with more strength and assures her the right person is out there.

- I think Jacob’s definitely gonna step in when Alice wants to set Renesmee up on dates and Edward’s literally gonna have a nervous breakdown because you remember the last time Alice had a fun idea? Bella got smooshed.

- But I seriously see Renesmee ending up with a girl, and it doesn’t surprise Jacob in the slightest.

- He ends up being the best man at the wedding and he’s crying again and you bet that Emmett, Bella and Alice (featuring Jasper Yeehaw Hale) are crying in laughter imitating him.

- But it’s a happy moment because Charlie is there, and Renee, the Denali’s, everyone who stood as a witness beside her and her family when she was younger… just the whole family.

- It’s a messy journey but honestly? Jacob is the biggest ray of sunshine the whole time even when he oversteps his mark, he always corrects himself and does the best he can for his Nessie.

- And that’s that on that.

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again, crediting my beta reader: @roslaeahle 💕

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[zimmerdouche]

This is something I’ve had saved on my computer since like June but I still have a lot of thoughts about the Poindexter family.

I forget where it was I read this, and whether it was actually canon or not, but effectively it said that the entire Samwell Hockey Team came from a place of privilege because hockey is an expensive sport.

Consider: Dex is a multiple. More specifically, a triplet. Three kids going to college at once? And that money related stress, piled on since birth? Save your money, Poindexter, because even though you aren’t that bad off you aren’t the only one that needs tuition and equipment.

I know Ngozi tweeted about Dex only having an older brother but let me have this.

Let’s talk more about the Poindexter triplets.

Wyatt Joseph Poindexter

The youngest triplet. Laid back, big thinker, just wants everyone to get along.

He grew a beard after high school because he was so. Fucking. Tired. Of being mistaken for his older brother. He’s only an inch shorter and everyone called them the Weasley twins, there needed to be a change.

Poster Boy for the rustic hipster aesthetic. Plaid shirts with the sleeves rolled up, ripped jeans, knit beanie, Timbs, occasionally suspenders? Plus a beard? Actual Lumberjack Wyatt Poindexter.

At the University of Maine majoring in Communication Sciences and Disorders with a minor in music. He’d like to focus on music education for the hard of hearing.

Fluent in American Sign Language. (He is the Number One Fan of Holly Maniatty, interpreter at hip hop concerts.) Can also stumble his way through casual conversation in French.

L o v e s music and will listen to any genre. Literally any, but he especially loves stuff that he can play on his guitar, and artists like John Mayer, Jack Johnson, Brett Dennen, Counting Crows, so on and so forth. He loves listening to lyrics and dissecting meaning and context, and will write his own lyrics on occasion.

He was a sprinter in high school and was pretty good but chose not to continue in college even though a few schools showed interest.

Gay and demisexual. He came out after his freshman year, after a lot of soul searching, meditation, and GSA meetings, to his siblings, whose collective response was “oh shit me too, thank God.”

Drives a truck older than he is with a bench seat and a paint job that’s mostly rust. He hot boxes it regularly and honestly? A big Triplet Bonding Event, especially after the Poindexters start college, is driving out to the middle of nowhere at midnight with snacks and drinks and weed and smoking in the bed of the truck, looking at the stars, and talking about life.

Group chat: has it on Do Not Disturb because his siblings never shut up. Will occasionally interject with one liners. Sends Snapchat screenshots of himself looking Bored as Fuck in any lecture that isn’t directly related to his career path and also plaid related memes.

Winona Jane “Ryder” Poindexter

The second oldest/middle triplet and the only girl. Fiercely protective and stubborn. Will kick your ass. Will kick everyone’s ass. Will kick her own ass.

Everyone calls her Ryder (like, Winona Ryder, the actress) because she absolutely despises the name Winona. The number one way to piss her off is to call her Winona, or God forbid, Winnie (Will does it when he wants her attention. She threatens murder).

Also at UMaine, studying bioengineering. Her ultimate goal is to lead a research team focused on artificial organs, but she has also considered becoming a professor. She’d be a great lecturer because she tends to ramble.

A thrift store fiend with a need to look like she came straight from the nineties. She likes mom jeans, denim in general, crop tops, Chuck Taylors, and UMaine athletic wear. She also steals her brothers’ flannel shirts.

She was on the color guard in high school and continues to be on the color guard in college. She’s damn good at it too. Can do some basic gymnastics/tumbling, but the back handspring is about as fancy as she can go. Damn good at dancing in general. She also loves to swing dance, and while she couldn’t get Wyatt into it she managed to get Will to dance with her and he enjoys it much more than he’ll ever let on.

Her freshman spring semester she took a video editing class and part of the class was start a YouTube channel so that she could upload assignments to it. She chose to do a vlog channel and she titled it “Ryder Die,” and she just kinda stuck with it after the class ended. Will and Wyatt make regular guest appearances.

Lives for Spongebob related memes. It’s a problem. Wyatt had to ban her from showing Spongebob memes in the car because she would try to show him like one every three minutes while he was driving.

Bisexual as fuck and... uncomfortably open about her sex life. Ryder, your brothers do not want to know about that. Stahp.

Group chat: Ryder’s contact names from both of her brothers are just various Winona Ryder characters. She’ll purposely call Wyatt Will and Will Wyatt. “Guys how does this outfit look?” (30 seconds later) “Why am I asking you two I look fantastic”

William Jacob “Will” “Dex” Poindexter

The oldest triplet. High strung, reserved, very loyal and very protective, even more so than his sister.

His siblings call him Will, Samwell Men’s Hockey calls him Dex. His siblings will probably never call him Dex, it’s just weird. Do you call your brother by his last name? Why would you? You have the same last name!

Studying computer science/engineering at Samwell University.

Does the guy own anything that ISN’T plaid? Yes, he does, but you wouldn’t know it by looking at him. God, does he look like his brother.

Can stumble his way through a few songs on the guitar and can carry a tune better than his brother, (“Fuck you, Will! You’re not even going into music!”) but refuses to sing in public. He may hum, if you’re lucky.

Defensemen on the Samwell Men’s Hockey team.

Left handed so, basically, if Wyatt didn’t have a beard, they’d be completely mirrored. They are identical, after all.

Bisexual with a pretty strong male preference.

Group chat: Bickers with Ryder a lot, usually if he instigates conversation it’s to complain about his defense partner Derek Nurse. He does this often enough that Ryder suspects they’re dating. Once, when they were actually getting along, he sent a selfie and Ryder’s response was, of course, a Spongebob meme – “OH NO HE’S HOT!”

These three together? Oh boy

This bit is more about their parents but is required for context: Papa Marcus Poindexter is a Baptist worship pastor. Mama Cara Poindexter was Irish Catholic but converted after she started dating Marcus. They are… extremely conservative, more so than the rest of their extended family, and it’s not exactly a healthy environment for the triplets. They’ve all set off firecrackers in the baptismal pool though.

All three of them have like, three different personalities, depending on who is around them. There’s the “I’m with my parents” personality, which will always prevail in any situation and is very submissive and agreeable, the “I’m with my siblings but not my parents” personality, which will prevail provided their parents are not around and is very loud and laughter filled, and then “I’m with anyone else but not my siblings” personality, which is at any other time and shifts based on who they’re talking to.

Their group chat is. A mess. The name changes constantly and most of the time it’s just them bitching about everyone they know.

Favorite GC Names include:

Those Damn Poindexter Kids

Poindexter Meme Team

Will/Ryder/Wyatt is the Hot One

Which one are you again?

Fluent in American Sex Language

God Nerfed Us

Our Hair is Red because the Devil is Our Father

Mad 4 Plaid

Summer after their freshman year of college, some guy named Jake Nichols made a bet with his buddy that he could hook up with all three of them at least once. He did it, the madman, and they don’t figure it out until MONTHS later and it’s the best story to tell at parties, but only when all three of them are there together.

Wyatt and Will run in the mornings when they’re together, Will and Ryder will do dexterity training together, and Ryder and Wyatt will do your Everyday Gym Trip together (where Ryder does strength training and Wyatt general Fitness Upkeep).

Ryder and Wyatt visit The Haus when the Frogs are juniors:

So damn polite, oh my god, Bitty LOVES them because they all want to help in the kitchen like Dex does, and they brought even MORE food, bless their hearts. 

Wyatt gets along with Nursey like a house on fire. Ryder won’t stop doing eyebrow waggles at Dex every time he and Nursey say anything to each other.

Graduates are visiting bc plot and Ryder is well on her way to hook up with Ransom when he realizes that he doesn’t live there anymore and there’s no room to go to, whoops. He tried to ask Dex if he could flirt with his sister and Dex r e f u s e d to broach the topic with him. “If she wants to it’s fine.” “But-” “IF SHE WANTS TO IT IS F I N E.”

Wyatt brings his guitar and there’s a jam session in the front yard, somehow he convinces Will to sing. It’s an exciting time, Nursey brings out a ukulele and everyone’s humming along and somehow there’s a firepit is this even legal? The music is great though, even though it’s 3 AM and the Lax bros are pissed.

IDK how but they’d get Nursey and Dex together. They conspire with Chowder and maybe Bitty and just. Make it happen. Witchcraft.

Fin.