#rip Daniel so sad he had to die from Link hitting him with a ball and chain

[badstargateimagines]

Imagine

SG-1 are going on a routine mission to the next planet down the list. The MALP showed nothing but lush green fields as far as the eye could see and they’re all excited. Hopefully this planet will be a nice one, not corrupt with Goa’uld tyranny.

When they get through the gate, they arrive in this beautiful field they’d seen on the MALP. As the begin to walk around, they stop at a bridge per Daniel’s request. He notes that the writing on the walls is unlike anything he’d seen before. Jack looks at his friend sideways, not used to Daniel being puzzled by alien text.

“Well, that’s a new one.” Jack says, his signature O’Neill sarcasm not going unnoticed by Daniel.

“I’m serious, Jack. All the other places we’ve been, I’ve been able to pick out something, at least a symbol or a word! This is…” he gestured vaguely to the wall. “This might as well be gibberish.” He continued.

Jack sighed and rolled his eyes. “Well, figure it out or drop it, will ya? There’s a volcano over there that I can tell Cater’s itchin’ to get at, and there’s a castle in the distance that hopefully has someone in charge. We’re losin’ daylight!” Jack said, harshly. Daniel rolled his eyes and reluctantly turned away from his the runes.

They walked a while longer towards the castle, stopping occasionally for Sam to pick up a sample or for Daniel to video tape a wall. Suddenly, an arrow narrowly missed Teal’c head. The four dropped to the ground instantly and pulled themselves towards a nearby wall for cover. They heard the hooves of a horse and a man yelling to get the horse to go faster. Jack peered out at the man dressed in green on the horse, his bow at the ready and prepared to return fire. The man in green drew back his arrow and shot it off. A nearby growl made SG-1 collectively look back. They saw a monster behind them laying on the ground motionless.

The horse drew nearer and nearer before it stopped just on the other side of the wall they were huddled behind. They all had their weapons at the ready as they heard the man dismount his horse. The man in green rounded the corner, now unarmed. He stared at them for a time, their weapons seemingly meaning nothing to him. His goofy long hat blowing gently in the wind.

Daniel urged everyone to put down their weapons and made his way to the front of the group. He pointed at himself. “I’m Daniel. We’re explorers.” He explained. The man in green again said nothing. Jack grimaced.

“Not much of a talker, huh?” He asked. The man in green continued to stare at them. “Look, buddy, we just wanna know who’s in charge here and we’ll be on our way, alright?” He said. The man in green nodded.

“Sir, I don’t know if he knows English… maybe Daniel should try…” Sam urged.

Before Daniel had a chance to try any greetings in any other languages, the man in green pulled a giant fuck-off ball and chain out of seemingly nowhere and started swinging it around. They took cover again but Daniel was too slow and got hit as the man in green yelled “HYEAH!”. The last thing the others saw was the man putting his ball and chain back into ??? His pants I guess??? And proceeded to converse with his shadow. He then turned into a wolf and disappeared in little pieces up to the sky. This was going to be one hell of a report.