#rice bowl fic
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wayfinderrinku · 6 months ago
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At some point, the rice bowl fic will come out (have recently started working on it again)
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fisheito · 7 months ago
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i am thinking about. From the Earth, Nectar
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yyuuraii · 1 year ago
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animeboy baker aypierre bc im feelin silly
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ittybittyfanblog · 13 days ago
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Error 404: (Self-Aware!AU, Sylus Edition)
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Summary: A LADS self-aware!AU featuring Sylus (+ maybe the other MLs!) and an oblivious player. That’s it, that’s the plot. Tags: player!reader x sylus, fem!reader x sylus, reader x lads, maybe some suggestive language?? will add more tags as the story progresses A/N: This is gonna be a multi-chapter fic! I’m still not sure whether to do the boys in rotation, or just focus on one ML per series. Don’t take my word for it atp tho – I’m not even sure if I can actually finish a series lol.  Also, I’ve had the creative liberty of changing stuff from the actual gameplay here and there. (Except for the self-awareness. That’s most definitely real.) Hope you enjoy~!
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Pt. 1 - Pt. 2 - Pt. 3
It’s a quarter past eight and you’re still on your desk working overtime on a Friday night. 
You let out a big sigh, leaning back on your office chair after an unhealthy duration of bad posture from hours of slouching down in front of your computer. There’s nothing ergonomic about the way this job is killing you, and the ache in your lower back can attest to that. 
An irate orange tabby plops himself in front of you, blocking your view of the glaring screen and you figure that it’s time for a break. 
“Me-oow.”
“I know, I know,” You answer tiredly, standing up to dodge a stray paw clawing your way and you hear cracks in three different places that are honestly unbecoming of a woman your age. You haven’t even reached thirty yet, for god’s sake. “I’m a bad mother. But mom also had to skip dinner to make it to the seven PM meeting, so cut me some slack, okay?” 
A high-pitched “meooowr!” is the only response you get; it seems like there’s no excusing late dinner time this time around. 
As much as you’d like to hem and haw and complain, the main reason why you’re still keeping this job is because you can work remotely. If it weren’t for the fact that you’re stuck most days at home working hours past your regular nine to five, having to be on-call around the clock at all times, and that you’ve consumed more sodium than a nitrite victim with the way you live off cup ramen, then, really, it beats working in an office where you’d physically have to clock in and out from exactly nine to five. 
Your right eye twitches. No, I have not fallen in love with the system that exploits me, thank you very much. 
“Here is your Fancy Feast, your highness,” you tell the hungry feline who’s already ignoring the hand that feeds for the bowl full of white fish paté. He eats healthier than you, sure, but you work like this for him to eat like this. The life of a single mom is an uphill battle, but extremely rewarding. 
You raise your hand to pat your son’s head lovingly, aborting the gesture halfway when you hear a warning growl. Alright, tough crowd. 
After nuking a half-eaten takeout box in the microwave and grabbing a cold Bundaberg from the fridge, you hunker down on the “chaise lounge” (see: an old wingback and a rattan ottoman you’ve refurbished as a makeshift seat a few weeks back when you had guests over) for a late meal. 
You barely register the taste of lukewarm rice on your tongue, mouth moving mechanically while your mind runs on autopilot about everything and nothing at the same time. 
Maybe it’s time to check Jobstreet again
Is there like a laundromat near the area that’s open twenty four seven
Eugh, I hate cold peas
What do we feel about Chromakopia? 
I will… die alone
I really need to stock on some fresh produce this weekend–
Ping! 
A notification from your phone pulls you out of your thoughts – and like a well-trained dog pavlov’d into responding, you visibly perk up at the sight of your lock screen lighting up and the familiar banner you’ve already memorized by heart. 
Your Galaxy Explorer rewards are here. Did you put my hotel’s address as the shipping address? 
Ah, just like clockwork. 
You press on it with a quiet, bubbling anticipation, chewing on the plastic spork as you wait impatiently for the silly mobile game that’s been your short respite at intervals – for more than you’d care to admit – to boot up. 
Offhandedly, you wish that the devs would add more variations to the game’s push notifications; more random, personalized stuff like maybe a reminder to drink water, or a fun update about their day. What you’d give – pay – for a: "Less on the overtime, kitten. I miss you,” dialogue from a certain character, but you digress. 
Oh, well. Probably better this way, lest you dig yourself deeper into delusion. 
The game greets you with the usual picturesque view of a silver-haired man sitting cross-legged on a chair, looking all the bit at ease in his signature crimson and white button up. The warm ambience of the Destiny Café at night draws you in, already pulling your attention away from the never-ending stream of thoughts in your brain. 
“Before seeing you, I thought today would be another dull day,“ Sylus comments airily. The way he drawls out the words in that deep timbre of his voice never fails to make your heart flutter – just a teeeensy bit.
“Ever the charmer,” you sigh happily in return, situating yourself more comfortably on the sofa, almost horizontal from how far you’re leaning back on the cushion. “You’re looking awfully normal tonight. What, no pineapple glasses for your favorite girl?” 
Having bypassed the initial cringe of talking to yourself after literal months of gameplay, it almost comes off natural, the banter. You’ve already accepted the fact that you’re crazy about a fictional, pixelated man – what’s pretending to have actual conversations with him gonna do? It’s not as if he actually hears you yap your nonsense; there are worse things in the world than a parasocial attachment to an otome game character. 
Your little jab at the sometimes random addition to his choice of attire earns you a laugh from the man itself– or at least it looks as though it does, making you blink momentarily in surprise. Happy coincidence, I guess.
You shake your head, cracking a smile, then proceed to do the routine of completing the daily agenda and then some. 
It’s tedious business, sure. You’ve dedicated hours upon hours on this game and you’re honestly starting to feel pretty bored with some of the gameplay elements, but you *do* like the ritualistic nature of ticking off the tasks one by one. It’s almost ironic – the way you dutifully do one thing after the other in this game, just to avoid the pile of work that’s waiting for you in real life. 
It’s not as if anything, or anyone’s relying on you to do your daily log-ins, so you suppose it’s due to that lack of pressure as well. 
Pulling yourself away from the five-star Xavier memory card you’ve grinded to level seventy, you stare despondently at the sad little 2 on your remaining energy. The embarrassing amount of materials you lack to ascend the card seem to mock you, even as you exit the Memories window. Another goal for another day, perhaps.
All tasks on the daily agenda are complete, except for one that you’ve always saved for last.
You’re met with a standing Sylus on the game’s home screen, arms crossed and wearing an expression you’d almost describe as impatient, if you didn’t know any better. The sight makes you grin. 
Cheekily, you poke his crotch.
You’re looking forward to getting a playful remark, or if you’re lucky, a blush along with an embarrassed retort about your shamelessness. 
 What you get, however, is a resounding scoff. Your eyes snap back to his face – from, ahem, your prolonged staring at the area below his waist – and you do see the familiar tinge of pink on his cheeks, but what he says in response catches you off-guard.
“You spend that much resource for a card that isn’t mine?” Sylus tsks, both his voice and expression coming across as… affronted? “Kitten, I’m actually hurt.” 
Huh?
You haven’t heard that line from him before. Was there a recent update you weren’t aware of? The man in question then appears to look amused, from the way you’ve been rendered speechless by the unexpected dialogue. 
All at once, you gasp when you realize what the new response means. 
“That’s so smart,” you say giddily. You see Sylus cock his head to the side, synchronously quirking an eyebrow—expectant. “They actually added a feature that lets them know which memory I’ve upgraded last, and make you react to it. Oh, that’s so cool!” 
If you weren’t too busy being excited over what you think is a new update from the game,  you’d see the chagrined look on Sylus’ face. But when you glance back at him, all trace of the emotion is gone before you could notice anything different. 
“Don’t worry, Crow Man. You’re still my favorite,” you assure him, making his mouth tick upwards in a semblance of a smile. He looks pleased all of the sudden, his demeanor shifting into something more relaxed.
Then a pout forms on your face. You crinkle your nose in frustration as you complain, “It’s just really hard to level your cards up at this point. It takes ages and a shit ton of energy just to level you up past seventy five.” Sighing, you add, kind of bitterly, “And I’m too broke to be spending money on growth packs.” 
Checking the time on your phone, you see that you’ve already spent more than an hour on your self-imposed break time and you know that you ought to get back to work soon. With a groan, you pull yourself to sit upright, savoring the last few minutes of free time before you slave off for the rest of the night. 
You’re about to clean up what’s left of dinner when you notice the oddly thoughtful look on Sylus’ face. 
There’s a deep furrow in his brows as he brings a hand up to cover his mouth. He closes his eyes shut for a few seconds. He's never done that gesture before... Ugh, he looks really hot–
Suddenly, you see a flicker— then a weird, sort of graphic distortion happening in the background. Uh, what??
A beat; then a glitch on the screen. “Ah, shit.” 
The game crashes.
You exhale loudly as the game’s interface goes back to the loading screen, tapping your thumb impatiently as the bar slowly loads to 15%... 50%..... 81%....... 
“Maybe make sure to patch up first before releasing an update next time, jeez— Huh?” 
For a quick second, nothing seems to be amiss. But then the first thing you see on the home screen is Sylus’ figure standing before you, wearing an expression one could only describe as a cat that ate the proverbial canary. 
He speaks— and it’s another intro you haven’t heard him say, ever. 
“You should’ve told me sooner, sweetie,” he almost coos the words out, making your eyes bug out in shock. 
“Now, why don’t you go check your–” he pauses, and his mouth moves as if he’s rolling the word out, testing it. “Inventory?” 
Sylus slides his gaze towards the upper left corner of the screen, a coy smirk still ever-present on his face. 
There, you see something you haven’t noticed earlier: two notification badges. One on your mailbox, and another on the Hunter’s Info tab. Bewildered, you press on the mail icon first, despite the insistence for you to start with the latter. 
You see a new message: [For You]
A small gift, to bridge our worlds closer. – S 
Nothing is attached to it. You read it twice, perplexed.  
“You’re quite the contradictorian, aren’t you?” Sylus tuts as soon as you return back to the home screen, his gaze boring into you even when he tilts his head sideways in mock exasperation. “Mmm, I suppose it doesn’t matter. Take all the time you need, sweetheart.” 
Helplessly, you open your inventory next. 
Your jaw drops. 
“What. The fuck,” You whisper to yourself, voice wavering in disbelief at what you’re seeing, and the sheer amount of what you’re seeing. “This– this can’t be real.” 
You see that all the materials you own, from the bottle of wishes to the ascension crystal boxes, have been multiplied a hundred times over.
And on top of that–
Ninety nine thousand red dias????
You cannot believe how this– this recent… update (or is it a bug? Infold sure isn’t this generous) didn't make the news. Even as someone as uninvolved as you are with the community and the game’s latest releases, something like this for sure would’ve made headlines on Twitter (X), at least. But you haven’t heard anything. Nada. 
Holy shit. 
You feel a little light-headed, both from incredulity and excitement. Needing a moment to calm yourself down, you exit the Inventory tab in a daze.
You stare at Sylus. He stares back at you with what looks to be mirth in his eyes. 
Skeptically, you mutter, “did–did I get hacked or something?” 
Anticipating another unexpected dialogue to prompt up, you wait for a full minute without saying anything else. And for a moment, the man in front of you looks indecisive, contemplative. 
There’s something very odd, very… human in the way he’s looking at you. He looks as if– as if he’s—
His face falls back into a neutral expression. Not unlike how his idle animation usually looks. 
..
….. It doesn’t seem like he’s going to initiate a conversation any time soon, so you hesitantly poke him on the nose. 
“Even in the worst-case scenario, there’s no need to panic.”
You’ve heard that one before.
So he’s back to normal now. You temper the small disappointment that blooms in your gut. 
Shaking your head slowly, you try to make sense of all the stuff that just happened, but a sharp bite on your ankle pulls you out of your reverie. 
“Ow–!” The sight of your cat flopping near your feet reminds you of the time. More importantly, the backlogs waiting for you at your desk. 
“Wait, shit– I gotta get back to work.” This… unbelievable stroke of good luck (?) is gonna have to take a backseat for now.
You grab the carton box and the half-empty bottle of sparkling peach as you stand up. Making quick work of throwing the container in the trash and gulping down the rest of your drink, you rush into your room and back in front of your PC. 
Cracking your knuckles, you gingerly set your phone against the monitor. Setting the timer to one hour in Quality Time, knowing fully-well that you’re going to have to keep extending it until the wee hours of the morning – or until your battery dies, whichever comes first – you give Sylus one last look, letting out a long exhale before locking in.
“Just keep me company for the night, alright? I’ll figure out what’s going on once my shift’s over.” 
It could just be your overactive imagination, but you swear you hear a quiet chuckle from the man polishing his gun in your peripheral.
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dearlyjun · 7 months ago
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CALL OUT MY NAME ☆ c. seungcheol
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☆ PAIRING: slightly possessive boyfriend!cheol x reader (f)
☆ GENRE: NSFW (18+ readers only!!)
☆ SUMMARY: your ex boyfriend can’t seem to stop texting you lately; wouldn’t want to make your current boyfriend angry would you?
☆ WORD COUNT: about 1.8k
☆ WARNINGS: cheol is possessive in a protective way, mentions of an ex boyfriend that won't leave you alone, ex boyfriend is min yoongi, cheol has a deep voice, mentions of cheol working out, cheol is tatted, he wants to fight her battles for her (king), unprotected sex, different sex positions (cowgirl, kneeling missionary), semi voyeurism, clitoral stimulation, spanking (like once), cumshot, foul language, cheolie is very sweet at the end!! lmk if i missed anything!!
☆ AUTHORS NOTE: posting this in honor of @miupow’s birthday!! happy birthday, lia!! you’re one of my dearest friends (and moots) on here. im so glad we met!! and also shout out to lia for beta-ing her own bday fic and correcting my half asleep writing. yeah even i don’t know what was going on there.
BE ADDED TO MY TAGLIST HERE!
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You were setting a bowl of food and a glass of iced tea down on your kitchen island, when your laptop started ringing.
“Ah, Cheol, give me a minute!” You spoke out loud to yourself, quickly grabbing a fork before tapping your keyboard to accept the video call coming through.
“Hi, Cheolie.” You greeted in a sing-songy voice as he -was filled up your screen with a smile on his face.
Your boyfriend was in Japan on a business trip for a few days; scheduled to come home tomorrow. You both made it a routine to have dinner together every night over video calls.
“You look pretty.” He answered, his gaze never leaving you.
You giggled at his compliment. “You see me everyday.”
Seungcheol smirked. “And? You’re always pretty.” He motioned at your bowl that was in the camera frame. “What’s for dinner today?”
“Oh, um, spicy pork bibimbap. You know; my favorite. What are you having?”
Seungcheol pointed to some things on the table he was sitting at. “Tuna and rice with some spicy sauce and vegetables, and chicken.” He let out a laugh. “Kind of boring.”
You smiled at him before taking a bite of your food. “Did you go to the gym today? I saw the workout notification on my watch.” You referenced your activity sharing feature on your Apple Watch.
“Yeah, of course the last day I'm here I find this really nice gym.” Seungcheol rolled his eyes and took a bite of his food before speaking again. “I was so excited that I actually almost did a 400 pound deadlift.”
“Oh my god…” You were just as excited for your boyfriend’s gym achievements as he was.
“Hang on, I think I took some pictures.” He picked up his phone and was scrolling through some pictures. “Yeah, see?” Seungcheol turned his phone screen towards his computer so that you could see. He scrolled through pictures of the scenery of the gym, and some pictures in the mirror.
“I like that one.” You suddenly spoke up with a smirk on your face.
“Which one?” Seungcheol questioned before looking at his phone to see the one of him completely shirtless In the mirror, showing off his back that was beautifully adorned with muscles and his tattoo that you loved so much. “Oh with the tattoo?” He smirked, knowing fully well how much you liked it.
“Yeah.” You smirked, cheeks flushing like this was the first time you saw him. Seungcheol always seemed to have that effect on you.
“I didn’t go to the gym today, I went shopping instead.” You slightly laughed.
“Yeah, I saw the Amex notification.”Seungcheol joked, setting his phone back down. “Buy anything nice?”
You gasped, dramatically covering your face. “See! That's why I don’t like using it all of the time.” Seungcheol always let you use his credit card to treat yourself however you pleased, and sometimes you would buy clothing pieces that he’d like on you. Unfortunately, the notifications always went to his phone.
Seungcheol looked at his phone again, laughing at your dramatics. “It’s not like it shows me what you bought. It just tells me the store.”
“Well you’ll be home by evening tomorrow, right?” You questioned. “I’ll show you then. It’s–“
Your voice trailed off as suddenly a notification of a text message popped up at the top of your laptop screen. It was your ex boyfriend, Min Yoongi. For some reason he has been non stop bothering you lately; asking how you’ve been, if he can “catch up” with you. You ignored every one of his advances thus far, but you hadn’t said anything to Seungcheol.
“What’s wrong?” Seungcheol instantly noticed the change in your tone and expression. “You got so quiet all of a sudden.”
You sighed. “Cheolie, I hate you fighting my battles for me.”
“It’s my job.” Seungcheol quickly retorted. “What’s going on?”
“My ex boyfriend. Do you remember Yoongi?” Seungcheol nodded. “For some reason he’s been trying to get a hold of me; texting me like he wants something between us again.”
Seungcheol got closer to his computer, the tone in his voice suddenly deepening. “Show me the texts.”
You picked up your phone, showing him the screen of multiple texts to all of which you did not respond to.
“And you didn’t respond?” He questioned, reading the texts on your phone as you swiped through.
“No, I haven’t responded to any of them.” You answered.
“Okay.” Seungcheol spoke, leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms in front of himself. “I can’t get an earlier flight out. But If this happens again, I’m dealing with him.”
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“Yeah, fuck yourself on my cock just like that baby.” Seungcheol sighed, looking down at his lap to where his cock was disappearing inside of your wet cunt. “Fucking use it.”
Seungcheol brushed your hair off of your shoulders for access to your collarbones; sucking and biting at your skin. You whimpered In response, combing your fingers through his dark hair and giving it a slight tug. That only egged him on more; letting out a low grunt.
Seungcheol gripped onto your hips, angling them forwards so that when you slammed down onto him, his cockhead would be hitting a different spot.
“Cheol! Fuck!” You cried out, reaching to hold onto Seungcheol’s sturdy frame before falling into his chest.
“Yeah, gonna fucking cum?” Seungcheol’s grip moved to your thighs as you whimpered; your face buried in the crook of his neck. “Look at me, look at me.”
You pulled yourself up, still using him for stability. You couldn’t fight your orgasm right now if you tried to.
Until your phone starts ringing, lost somewhere in the tangled bed sheets.
You jump, clearly startled by the ringtone playing at almost full volume.
“The fuck….?” Seungcheol muttered, eyes fixated on his wet cock disappearing in between your legs.
“Ignore it.” You hissed, lifting yourself up off of him enough so just the tip was inside of you, only to slowly sink back down to feel every inch of Seungcheol’s cock.
Seungcheol knew that was on purpose, yet he still let out one of the hottest moans to ever come out of his mouth.
“Give me that fucking phone.” Seungcheol spat, putting one arm around you to keep you in place as he rummaged around the sheets to his right.
He managed to find it despite your whining, looking to see that the screen read a phone number across it and not any caller ID.
Seungcheol shot you a glance before swiping the green icon at the bottom of the screen to pick up the call. He then put it on speaker phone.
“Who is this?” The tone in his voice was deep and oddly steady considering that you were still perched up on his lap with his cock inside of you.
“Y/N?” The voice on the other side of the phone said your name, startling you. You froze. It was Min Yoongi of all people that could be calling you.
You saw Seungcheol’s jaw clench as he heard another man say your name, but with his free hand he still gave your ass a light smack to keep moving.
“Why are you calling my girlfriend’s phone? I know who this is.” Seungcheol used his free hand to pinch one of your nipples between your fingers, making you whimper.
“I just wanted to talk…” Yoongi’s voice trailed off and you didn’t know what he said only because Seungcheol whispered to you to lie down onto your back.
You followed directions, wincing at the empty feeling between your legs when you were on your back. Seungcheol immediately pushed your knees towards your shoulders and kneeled in front of you, aligning his cock with your entrance once again.
“We can talk.” Seungcheol spoke to the phone while he was teasing your folds with the tip of his cock. You grabbed a hold the comforter with your left hand, desperate for something to hold onto.
“Cheol, fucking put it in. Please.” You whined loud enough to be heard through the phone. Seungcheol had a satisfied look on his face, nodding as he finally pushed himself inside of you slowly enough so you felt everything; all of him.
You threw your head back; arching your back against the bed. Seungcheol put his hand onto your stomach to keep you still, then moved it down slightly to stimulate your clit with his thumb. Letting out a strained moan, you nearly wanted to scream.
“Awful quiet there, Yoongi. That’s your name right?” Seungcheol’s voice was so deep that your core clenched around him tight. “What happened to talking?” You were sure that the noises of his cock sliding in and out of you could be heard on the phone by now.
“I mean, obviously I’m a bit busy right now.”
“Cheol!” Your voice startled even you. Not quite a scream, but more like a whiny moan. Seungcheol’s body was quickly against yours within mere seconds; with his weight pressing into you.
“Mhm, call out my fucking name baby.” Seungcheol’s lips ghosted over yours as he lightly kissed you, then he found your right hand that was gripping onto the comforter and laced his fingers with yours. “Let him and everyone else hear it.”
The call either dropped or your phone died because it was silent, but neither of you were paying any attention.
“Cheol! fuck!” You swore, and just like that you were cumming all over his cock; shaking as he kissed you sweetly all over your face.
Seungcheol was on the brink of cumming, and you could tell. So naturally, you used his weakness to your advantage. He always gave in when you begged him to cum inside of you; he’d never tell you no.
“Cheolie, cum in me….please.” You gripped onto his thick arms as he supported himself above you; following your words exactly as his breathing became unsteady.
“Shit…fuck.” Seungcheol panted, dropping his head and making his hair fall into his face. You couldn’t help but let out a whimper at the feeling of him finishing inside of you.
The two of you were silent, and Seungcheol adjusted himself to not drop his entire weight onto you.
“I’m sorry, cheolie.” You muttered, running your fingers through his now messy hair.
He quickly had a concerned look on his face. “For what, princess? You didn’t do anything.”
You slightly laughed at the situation. “My ex is calling me, literally while we’re having sex.”
Seungcheol was smirking. “Yeah, but he’ll probably never call again.” He grabbed your hand, kissed the back of it, then kissed your face. “He should know that you’re mine.”
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☆ TAGS: @lavnderwonu @dokyeomkyeom @https-yeonjun
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peachesofteal · 9 months ago
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Simple Math / Part Ten
Simple Math masterlist
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Ghost/Soap/female reader 5.4k words - AO3 Warnings-tags: 18+ MDNI. Masturbation, dirty (self) talk, brief daddy kink. This fic contains mature themes. Domestic violence. Grooming. Feelings of fear and anxiety. Nurse!reader. Kissing. Lots of dialogue. Bun considers making a friend. Penny is cute. Flirting. Touching. Comfort. Bun refers to herself as "heavy". Simon is Simon. POV switch. Dinner date.
“I’m Philip.”
The handsome brunette smiles, grabbing onto your hand. You blink, trying to understand, trying to make it make sense, when he prompts you with a teasing grin. “This is the part where you tell me your name, sweet thing.” 
Oh. You stumble over it, tongue tied into a million knots, sweat from the Texas sun beating down your back, sweat slicking your shirt to your skin. 
He’s still holding your hand, and you’re standing there with wide, doe eyes, shell shocked. 
He’s… so handsome. And older. Older, and handsome. Polished type, with good teeth and good hair. He looks like he just stepped off the golf course. 
Why is he talking to you? 
He glances down at your drink. 
“You even old enough to be drinkin’ that?” 
“I-“ You’re terrible at lying, and like he can read it on your face, he chuckles. 
“You live around here?” 
“I go to Rice.” 
“A bit young for college, aren’t you?” 
“I just turned eighteen!” You’ve heard it a million times. You’re too young to understand something, or know something, or do something. You don’t get the way the world works yet. You’re not an adult. 
He holds his hands up. “I’m sorry. I bet you’re one of the really smart girls that make all us men look like Neanderthals.” Your face heats. 
“N-no. I just… I graduated early. I’m not a know it all.” You defend yourself, desperate to create distance from the usual stereotype, the way most people see you. The way boys see you. 
Too smart. Face buried in a book. Awkward and stiff. Uncool. 
He traces you from head to toe, appreciative gaze grazing over the swell of your hips, the generous curve of your ass. “I didn’t think you were. Too mature for that, I bet.” He croons, and your knees go weak. 
“Y-yeah. A lot of people say I’m really mature.” 
Two things compete for your attention when you open your eyes.
One: there is a soft, lovely song playing downstairs, something spring-like and sweet, vibrant without being too loud.
Two: the house smells like pancakes.
You check your phone, shocked to see you’ve slept for yet another 12 hours. There’s a text from Nia, and a text from your boss.
>You have a lot of time accrued. Take as much as you need. 
That settles that, you guess.
There are also text messages in the group chat, one from Simon, and one from Johnny, coming in only a few minutes ago.
Simon: >Penny gets pancakes on Saturday mornings. They’ll be plenty, come down and eat when you’re ready. 
Johnny: >I’m missing all the good stuff. 
You stretch, cautiously, wiggling fingers and toes, spreading your limbs as far as you can without pushing it too much. You’re sore, uncomfortably so, and still exhausted, but if you stay in bed any longer, you’ll rot.
In the kitchen, Simon holds Penny and a mixing bowl, alternating hands to get a whisk through the batter while humming to his daughter on her hip.
You stop dead in your tracks.
He’s… he’s not wearing the mask. 
You stare at his face, his whole, naked face for the first time, taking in the broad jaw, every shiny white scar, and his (twice, if you had to guess) healed broken nose. He’s handsome, differently from Johnny but no less striking, and you can’t look away, stunned by his raw, depthless and rugged beauty. Penny’s leg has kicked up the hem of his shirt, exposing his midsection, and the flash of skin there feels like a scandal, something you shouldn’t be seeing but cannot get enough of. He looks nothing like you expected and yet… everything you hoped for.
“Morning.” Pen tucks her face into his chest shyly, peeking out from the corner of her eye, curious and cute. “Can you say good morning to bunny?” He bounces her a little, and she giggles.
"Bunny." She says quietly, and Simon laughs.
“That’s right. Good job.” After a second of silence, you try to ask him about the missing mask, but the question gets confused on your tongue, and what comes out instead is clumsy and stunted.
“Your mask.” You cringe, immediately. It’s the first thing that slips loose, insensitive, and uncouth. “I uh, I’m sorry, I’m just… surprised?” you falter, and makes it worse. You think about trying to run back upstairs, hightailing it for the hills when he smiles, and points to the empty stool at the kitchen counter with a batter covered whisk.
“Sit.” There’s already a stack piled high, plain, and ones with big, juicy blueberries. Your favorite. 
“So, pancakes every Saturday?”
“Mhmm.” He settles Penny in her highchair to your left, and pulls an already cooled pancake from the stack, cutting it up into little, tiny pieces with a child’s knife and fork. “Pen and her Da,” he pads some butter across the top of his handiwork, grabbing her sippy cup and filling it with milk. “Have pancakes every Saturday when he’s home. It’s their favorite. Right?” He points at her, “your favorite?” and taps his middle finger to his chin, others outward, straight up. “Your favorite?” Signing?
“Are you teaching her sign?”
“Trying to. Pen’s birth mum is deaf. It’s important to us, that she’s able to connect with her when the time comes. Plus, my hearing is shot. So is Johnny’s. It’s a great way for her to communicate with us.” He strokes some fingers through her curls, and she doesn’t even look up, too busy shoveling as much pancake into her mouth as she can. You have a million questions now, curiosities bubbling to the surface, about Pen’s mum, about her life, about how she came to be their child. All too rude, and too invasive to ask. “Or, to use when she’s feeling sassy and can’t find the words. That happens, too.”
“She’s what…sixteen months?” You watch her intently, unable to not smile when she cheeses at her dad with a mouthful of food, even though your tender skin stings with the movement.
“Yeah. Top percentiles in a lot of things for her age. Said her first word before she was one.” He’s rich with pride, a deep well of love shining in his eyes, and you force your own down to the plate, stifling the ache bleeding from your heart.
“Of course she is.” Penny holds pieces of sticky, syrupy pancake with both hands, attacking them with vigor, smearing her cheeks purple with the squished blueberries.
You need to eat something, but your brain is buzzing, unnatural discomfort stretching long in the back of your mind.
What’re you doing? Sitting here eating pancakes like everything is normal? Like everything’s okay? 
Everything is not okay. 
You drift, back to your apartment, back the venom of Phillip, the hands around your neck, the twist of your shoulder, back slamming into the wall. You can still feel him, still hear him, these memories like all the others, your body beaten on the floor, mind nearly broken. Trying to shift away from the hot end of a cigarette, screaming for help, running through a-
A hand covers yours.
He coaxes the fork from your fingers, metal vibrating within flesh.
“I think… I think I should go back to bed.” You whisper.
“Are you tired?”
“No… yeah. I don’t know.”
“You don’t have to run away, you know.” He flips a pancake onto your plate from the stack. “Just because you were somewhere else for a little bit.” Your cheeks burn. “We’ve got a pretty nice couch in the living room though, if you want some time alone and don’t feel too keen on the stairs.” Saturday morning pancakes and curling up on the couch? It sounds so nice, so normal, and must show on your face, because he chuckles. “Help yourself. You might have to share the TV though, in a bit. We watch baby Einstein on Saturdays, and she’ll need some entertaining for a minute while I get ready.” Your lips twist, an entire hearth lighting up in the bottom of your heart.
“Alright.”
Baby Einstein is as enthralling as you thought it would be, though Penny disagrees. She stares at the screen, wide eyed, open mouthed, sippy cup long forgotten, and even Simon struggles to get her attention after returning from getting dressed.
You force your eyes away from the strain of his thighs in blue jeans.
“We’re goin’ down to the hospital.” He tells you, pulling her upward over the back of the couch and rubbing his nose through her curls. It’s still… weird, to see his whole face. To clearly watch his expressions, sublime bliss pushing his mouth upward whenever he looks at his daughter. “Want to come?”
“I can’t, not if I’m taking time off. It… looks bad to admin. I can probably go in at night but, during the day is just a recipe for disaster.”
“Of course.” He looks around, for what you don’t know, shoulders tensing, then relaxing. “Well, you’ve got the remote. And my number. Are you… going to be, okay? Alone?”
Say yes. 
You can’t. All you can do… is nod.
“Okay well if you’re not. Just call.” You nod again, getting to your feet. Once you’re standing, you’re out of place, flailing in their living room, about to be here alone, with your memories, your poisoned mind.
What’re you doing? You’ve ruined everything. Broken all your rules. 
“We can stay.” Simon steps close, hand grazing the middle of your back, and you shake your head.
“No, no- I… I’m sorry.”
“You don’t-“
“Yes, I do.” Your voice shakes, and you slam your eyes shut. You can’t do this. “I shouldn’t be here. I’m putting you in danger, and I… I’m putting myself in danger and I’m being so- so stupid, Simon.” His gaze is heavy, serious, and he steps around you, sliding Penny into her bounce seat, turning it to face baby Einstein.
“Listen to me.”  As he returns, he reaches, carefully pulling you close, close enough you’re nearly in his chest, timing the rise and fall of his diaphragm. “We are safe, you are safe, sweetheart. ‘m not going to let anything happen to you, or Penny, or any of us. Alright?”
“You don’t understand.”
“Tell me.” You almost laugh, but something comes over you instead, something delirious and desperate. You lean into him, letting him hold you, hand smoothing over the back of your head. “You can tell me. You can trust us. We’ll take care of you.”
God, you want to. You want to so bad it aches, burns a ravenous fire in your heart. You want tell him, let them in. Tell them everything.
“Bun.” He murmurs, bringing you back, a finger under your chin.
“I can’t. I’m sorry, I can’t. It’s… it’s too much.”
“It’s alright.” He soothes, but doesn’t pull away, and you’re drawn in like a magnet, rising to the balls of your feet, stuck in a trance, luring you closer.
He meets your halfway.
And then-
He’s kissing you, plush lips on yours, pancakes and fresh laundry and stained-glass windows of sanctuary on his tongue.
You’re standing in the sun, in the trance of another spell.
It’s a mouthful of butterscotch and maple. Sweet, delicious breakfast in bed, lazy Saturday mornings and whispered, tender words. It’s life unlike your own, a home, the promise of a love not fractioned, chipped away, or strangled… but multiplied, magnified. His touch is painfully gentle, slow and easy, encouraging you to follow his lead, carefully constructing a tiny universe to disappear to, where shadow cannot touch. A fantasy, cocoon of stars, ambrosial and sacrosanct, an escape from the hell nipping at your heels, the hell chasing you through your dreaming and waking hours. 
The anxious hum radiating through every cell in your body flatlines.
The girl in the mirror weeps.
Everything goes silent. Your breathing slows. Your hands fall to the side, listless and stunned.
Penny grunts. The moment shatters.
You can only stare with wide, terrified eyes.
“Johnny.” It’s the first word out of your mouth, the only thing you can conjure. “I’m sorry, I don’t know… I’m sorry.” Johnny. Johnny’s not here. How can he kiss you when his partner isn’t here? His heart will be broken, you’re destroying their family, you’re-
“I kissed you, bunny. Nothin’ to be sorry about.” Simon hums, still holding your face. “Johnny’s okay. He’ll be a bit jealous he didn’t get one too, but he won’t be upset.”
“How?” the question squeaks, and he takes your hand, tugging you towards the couch, settling you back into the cushions, easily guiding you with deft hands. He's so careful, so gentle, the touch of a man who raises a daughter, who loves his partner, adroit and nimble, anticipating movement before it happens. 
“After Penny goes down tonight, let’s have a drink. Or some late dinner. We can talk, and I’ll answer as many of your questions as I can. How’s that sound?” He strokes a thumb across the apple of your cheek. Talking can’t hurt, can it?
“O-okay. Yeah.” You try to shrug, pain lancing through your shoulder, and you try to smother your wince. He frowns.
“I want you to get some rest today.” A small grin creeps across your face.
“You always tell people what to do?” He nods, solemn.
“It’s my job. Takin’ care of you lot is an added bonus.” He breezes by the grouping of you with his family, like it’s a normal thing, rubbing circles in your palm. “Let’s get you comfortable.”
“I can-“
“I’m here. Let me help.” You don’t say anything at first. Can’t say anything, can’t formulate a response that encompasses everything you’re thinking and feeling, stuck on the mile high wall that is your fear and denial, afraid to jump. Afraid to fall.
He doesn’t push. Doesn’t ask you to respond, He just… settles you, cautiously arranging the pillows to support your injuries, lets you sit there atop the wall, staring down at the ground where they wait. Patiently. He rubs your back and your good shoulder until you’re drifting away in heady, hazy dream world, unable to stir when he slips free, tucking the blankets in around you, and pressing another long, lingering kiss to your brow.
You wake in a panic to the doorbell ringing. Your heart races, and you’re up off the couch, tucked around a corner of the hall, hiding, in a blink, even though your shoulder and neck scream at the sudden change of position.
Breathe. You’re losing it. Philip wouldn’t ring a doorbell. 
The door clicks open.
“Hello?” A woman’s voice echoes to where you’re still curled around the hallway, back pressed flat, eyes closed. “Hello? Anyone home?” Who is that? 
You peek, like a child. Peering around to see a familiar woman with grocery bags in her hands, depositing them on the kitchen counter.
She spots you immediately.
“Hi!” She’s grinning, pretty and bright, pulling a carton of milk from a brown paper bag and putting it in the fridge. “I’m Lou. Sorry, did I scare you? I tried to ‘announce’ myself.” She makes bunny ears with her fingers before and after the word announce, with half of an eye roll. “John’s always telling me I have to when I come over. Can’t be giving anyone surprises, and I knew you were here. Just wasn’t sure if you’d be up for visitors. Sorry if I gave you a fright.”
“No, I…” you trail off, readjusting, giving her your name. She nods and smiles again. “I remember you. In front of the elevator that day.”
“Yeah, that was me.” She’s earnest in her focus, beaming at you, almost like she’s excited.
“You look a little different out of your cute scrubs.” That gives you a small laugh, and you smile honestly at her, flattered.
“Thanks.”
“Sorry if I’m disturbing you.”
“Oh no, you’re not. I was just… I’m fine.” She pulls a flat of eggs free and stacks them next to a colorful pile of produce.
“I do the store runs for Simon right now. It’s too much, with Johnny in hospital and taking care of Pen. We’ve been trying to lighten his load.” Guilt twists. And here you are, adding onto it. 
“That’s very nice of you.” She waves it off.
“They’ve kept my husband alive a million times over. It’s the least I can do.”
“Right… they… work together?”
“Simon is semi-retired but yeah. They’re in a global task force. It’s the four of them. Have you met Kyle yet?”
“Oh, yeah. At the hospital one day.”
“Best guy, really.” Her clothes swish, warm and sweet aura practically glowing.
“Yeah, he was really nice.” She rests her hands on her hips and looks you over.
“You okay?” This woman is direct. She's got a no nonsense approach, and through intense, there's true ardor in her, passion and care. 
“Yeah, I’m just… still recovering.” You don’t know what she knows, not sure what they’ve told her or John, so you’re not sure how much, or what even, to say.
“Simon told us, about you being mugged. I’m so sorry, it’s just awful.” She’s sincere in her sympathy, big brown eyes sad and considerate.
“It’s okay, thank you. I’m okay.”
“If you need anything, I’m always around. Or if you want to talk to another girl that isn’t a toddler.” It’s an olive branch of friendship, you realize, or the beginnings of, and you’re startled, considering it, wondering if it would be so bad… to have a friend.
“Thank you.” She gives you her number, and you tap it in, shooting her a text with your name.
“You should sit.”
“I can help with these.”
“No, no. No offense, but you look half asleep. I’ve got it.” You laugh even though it hurts, awkward half shrug with good shoulder, and agree.
“Yeah, I’m still recovering. It’s been slow.”
“I’m sure.” You sit at the counter, watching her organize the fridge with scary efficiency. “I’ll be out of your hair in a minute. Just had to drop these off.”
“Oh, you’re fine.” It’s nice. You’re nice. She feels safe, the proximity to Simon and Johnny naturally leading you to feel comfortable, knowing she’s welcomed by them, she’s a part of their life. It makes you feel more at ease, and you try to convey it without getting tangled up in awkward words.
You don’t know how. Not really sure how to make genuine friends anymore, so you just sit there and watch, listening to her talk, enjoying how she rambles a little bit, laughing at herself.
When she says goodbye at the door, she promises to text you the next time she’s coming by, so you’re not surprised, and you linger there, watching her go, wondering if it’s real, surprisingly mourning the loss of companionship already.
“Johnny misses you.” The ice in Simon’s rocks glass clinks together as he sips his bourbon, corner of his mouth lifting in a partial smirk. “Not too fond of his new nurse, I’m afraid. Think he’s spoiled now.”
“How is he?” You’re on the edge of your seat for an update, but not wanting to pry too much. It’s a delicate line, one where you don’t know on which side to stand.
“Good. Wrist fracture is nearly healed, so he’ll be able to start on crutches soon. Once he does, he’ll be doing physical therapy for most of his day, and ready to come home. Should be soon.” He really smiles now, and you mirror it, unable to deny the infectious bloom of happiness spreading from him to you.
“And his liver?”
“No complications. Grafts for his burn are in great shape. Hip is the trickiest part.”
“Yeah, they take a lot longer to heal, but I’m sure he’ll do a great job of it, just like everything else.”
“Thanks to you.” You sip your wine, citrusy peach and passionfruit coating your tongue. It’s a nice bottle, and you were surprised when Simon brought it home, bag of takeaway in one arm, Penny in the other.
“No.”  Your cheeks heat. “I was just there. You guys did the hard work.”
“Wouldn’t have made it without you though. Think I would’ve lost it. Him too.”
“You would’ve been fine.” You brush it off, and he shakes his head.  
“You’re too modest.” He drains his pour, uncapping the bottle on the coffee table between you and refilling it halfway. Glass on glass chimes, and you sink deeper into the couch, relaxing, tucking your knees up until you’re half curled into a ball, wine glass cradled between your palms.
“So…”
“I told you; you can ask me whatever you like.” You knew this was the case, but hesitance is still brimming in your heart, uneasy feelings festering beneath your skin, burning question shoving to the surface.
“Did you tell Johnny we kissed?”
“I did.”
“Was he upset?”
“Only because he feels like he’s missing out. I told him we’d make it up to him.” Fire enflames your skin. We?
“And by we you mean… us. Together. Like… the three of us.”
“I do.” The girl in the mirror screams. She doesn’t understand, why you continue to act against her better judgement. Why you’re entertaining something so, so dangerous, something so stupid.
“Simon, I… I can’t.”
“You keep saying that but look where you are, bun.” He motions to the table, takeaway cartons scattered across the top, half empty bottle of wine, his bourbon, and a baby monitor. It looks like a nice night in, a simple, sweet life, not even close to being your own.
Still, the girl in mirror combats. Still.
“This isn’t… this isn’t a thing it’s just… we’re hanging out. I’m not going to be here forever, I’m looking for a place and I-“ His face changes, flicker of shadow fading across his brow before being chased away by the sunlight in his eyes. You thought he'd be easier to read, without the mask, imagined you'd be able to place his expressions but you're just as confused and lost as ever. 
“Slow down. There’s no need to look for a place to live.”
“W-what?” The wine has made you a little slow, a little sleepy, and you blink through the stupor.
“You’re still healing, sweetheart, and I know you're scared. I’ve known since the first day you stepped into Johnny’s room.”
“No.” You shake your head. Pain fizzles, numbed by alcohol, and your head swims.
“I know you weren’t mugged.” How? “I know you’re running from someone.” Oh god. The urge to get to your feet and bolt washes over you like a wave.
“I- I’m not.” The lie is bare-boned, pathetically unconvincing, and you know it. He knows it too; you can tell by the look on his face.
“You’re not ready to tell me, that’s fine. I’m patient. But you won’t be going anywhere if I don’t know you’re safe. And right now, to me, it doesn’t seem like you’re safe.” The pale yellow of your wine shines in the low lights of the living room, and you get lost in it, swirling around in his words, trying to put them together and pick them apart, desperate to understand what he means.
“Are you… are you saying you won’t let me leave?” You gulp. It’s a ridiculous conclusion, but the first one you jump to.
And in that, you know you’re giving too much away.
His face softens, and he reaches, pulling your free hand into his own, petting some sort of sequence into your skin. 
“Of course not, sweetheart. I’d never, ever force you to do something you didn’t want to do. But I do want you to stay, here with us. Where we can keep you safe, take care of you.”
“I don’t need-“
“I know you don’t. I know you take care of yourself just fine.” The indignant roar in the back of your mind settles. “But I’d love an opportunity to do it instead.”
“Simon…”
“Did you know the cells in our body hold onto trauma? They carry imprints of traumatic events. It can change your biology, the way you function.” He squeezes your hand. “It’s hard to realize… that it’s not normal, the way you might be, the way you think, or do things, when you’re carrying the physical memory of terrible things.” He’s not talking about you. There’s a fleeting flash of sadness in his eyes, ghosts circling the drain around his irises, and your heart aches. “We can help you. I don’t know who you’re hiding from, but I can guess what they’ve done- look at me.” You force your eyes back to him, and he cups your cheek. “You do not have to be afraid here. You are safe with me, with us. I know you don’t believe it, and I’ll tell you as many times you need, but it will never not be true. We can help you.”
“You don’t know… you don’t know what you’re saying.” Your denial is steadfast. They cannot possibly understand. 
A small seed of light blooms under darkness. It’s the sun, struggling to break free, trying to drag you into its warm, golden rays. It tugs and tugs, clawing towards you, illuminating the path forward.
The words come out before the girl in the mirror can stop them.
“You don’t know him. He’s sick and… powerful. He’s a monster but he’s smart, has connections, has ways of doing things that… I don’t even know. He’d kill you.” You clap your hand over your mouth in shock, surprised at yourself. It’s the most you’ve said about Philip in years.
You expect pushback. Expect Simon to flinch, or cower, or have good sense… a rational reaction to being told someone might try to hurt him.
He smiles instead, settling back on his side of the couch.
“I’d just have to get to him first, then.” Is he… is he? Simon watches you, reaches into your brains to peer inside, rooting around in your head. The way he looks at you, like he knows everything you’re feeling, can see what you're thinking, makes you shiver, makes you feel like you’re a tiny mouse in the shadow of a mountain. He sighs. “Give us a chance.”
“A chance?”
“A chance, to know you. Let us in, let us try. Stay here, with us, spend time with me and Johnny and Pen. No strings attached. If you decide it’s not for you… we’ll understand.”  
No strings attached. 
You could pick up and leave if you wanted. If you had to. 
What’re you doing? 
“How does it work? Would we all…” you trail off, confused.
“Date?” Simon finishes gently. “Yes.”
“So, you guys are… bi?” He chuckles.
“Yes, sweetheart. We’re bi.”
“Is this… a thing? Something you guys do?”
“We’ve never taken another partner before, no.” Your eyes widen. “You’re our first.” You don’t know why, but knowing is exhilarating and terrifying, all at the same time. You’re their first. 
He’s talking about it like it’s already happened. 
Fatigue settles in around you, thick fog of it draping over your shoulders and clouding your head.
“I… I don’t know.” You stifle a yawn. “I need to think.” He abandons his perch for one next to you, pulling your wine glass free and setting it on the table.
“Tired?” His fingers sweep over your cheek, skin warming under his touch.
“Mhmm.” You mumble, sleepily. Your head is very heavy, suddenly, hard to hold up.
“Alright.” He stands, bending to slide an arm under your knees, the other supporting your back in one fluid movement.
“What are you doing?” You squeak, grabbing onto him as he rises, lifting you into his chest at full height. Panic floods your nervous system, fevered tone pitching into a plea. “Put me down! I’m too heavy. Please, I’m too heavy, you can’t-“
“I’ve lifted a car off a teammate before.” He tells you, the thick of his body beneath your ear vibrating. “And I’ve dug Johnny out of a collapsed concrete wall. I’m made to pick things up, bunny. Heavy or not.” He holds you right there, all the way up the stairs, down the hall to the guest room, before settling you back on your feet, big hands around your waist for balance. Your back is to his chest now, and his nose drifts across the top of your head, slow path of his fingers stroking down your hip. “Alright?” He asks, and you nod, throat too dry to speak.
He squeezes. You stifle a gasp, resist the urge to press your thighs together.
It’s been so long since you’ve been touched, since anyone has handled you with reverence, with affection. You almost don’t recognize it.
His hand drifts, slipping between your thigh and cheek. “This okay?” He murmurs, and you manage a rough yes, word sticky and thick in your throat. Yes. Yes, don’t stop.��A fingertip strokes along the crease there, back and forth, before trailing upward. He takes as much of your flesh in his palm as he can, squeezing again, caressing, mouth skimming along your neck.  
“Oh.” you breathe. The room is warm, barely lit by the bedside lamp, and you burn in the dark, sensations sparking alive that have long laid dormant.
The girl in the mirror curses you.
“Need help getting to bed?”
“N-no.” Yes! “I’m… fine.” His lips touch your cheek, then your ear, breath blowing over you, firm, solid warm mass at your back exhaling shakily.
“Get some sleep.” He steps away, but not before he swings, slowly, softly, into the pillow plush of your ass. It’s a gentle tap, but the fire between your legs roars. “Goodnight, bun.”
“G-goodnight.”
Simon's got his sweatpants and boxers off before he's even fully in the bathroom, running right into the shower, hand wrapped around his throbbing cock as the water flicks on. It's not hot enough, but he doesn't even notice, cock heavy in his grip, tip already smeared wet with pre-come. 
"Fuck, bunny." He grits, trying to stay quiet but unable to hold his tongue.
He's awful, for this. Awful for doing this after you've had such an emotional night. Awful for touching you when you're still healing, awful for grabbing a handful of your ass and imagining sliding his dick through the space between those cheeks. He can't stop, strokes himself long, squeezing the base and pulling up and back as he imagines you on all fours, perfect globe perked up in the air for him, his cock sinking into your soaking wet pussy as you moan. He knows you would make the prettiest sounds for them, sweet gasps and cries, bouncing on Johnny's cock in his lap. 
"Hop like a bunny." He'd coo, and you'd whine, riding Johnny as Simon coached you until you were so close, almost there on the edge. "Show daddy how bad you want to come, little bunny." 
He jerks himself harder, eyes closed, imagining the ripple of your flesh, the way you'd bounce so perfectly, how Johnny would be gripping your hips with his head tipped back, throat exposed for Simon to nip and suck a mark into.
His bunny. His boy. 
His toes curl. Water streams down his back, slicking his skin, forearm burning with each stroke, imagination running wild as he gets closer and closer, thinking about you and Johnny and him together, finally, your legs spread wide in front of their faces, perfect pussy on display. He can almost hear the way you'd whisper their names, and it blinds him, fills his head with white light. He knows you're beautiful when you come, as beautiful as you are when you let your guard down and give him a real smile, as beautiful as you are everyday, so pretty and perfect, kind, even as a ghost. He imagines it, pictures it, the sight of his and Johnny's come leaking out of your hole, fingers shoving it back inside, marking you as theirs. 
He comes with your name on his lips, a strangled whisper, painting the tile with himself. 
He falls asleep with a new addition in their bed, on top of Johny's t shirt and the baby monitor... there's now a long sleeved tee, plucked from your dirty laundry this morning as he was getting ready to leave. It smells like you, something he wishes he could bottle, and he holds it close, tied in tandem with Johnny's, curled in his arms on top of the pillow. 
2K notes · View notes
ashtxrie · 5 months ago
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7:18 AM (jay)
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PAIR. non-idol!jay x gn!reader GENRE. fluff, established relationship, timestamp WORD COUNT. 1.0k WARNINGS. none! NOTES. i am BACK i'm finally writing again and it's just so fun and refreshing to write when there's not like. a million tests in the next few days!! anyway hope you enjoy this jay fic because he seriously needs more love hello??!! @star-sim vannie this is for You tbh after u wrote that sunoo fic that rocked my world
when you walk into the kitchen and stifle a yawn, jay can’t help the laugh that escapes his lips. and the sound feels gentle; it alights the morning with clementine warmth and settles against your skin to fill that missing familiarity you spent minutes searching for as you restlessly tossed amid your sheets.
“go back to sleep,” jay murmurs, and you can hear the smile in his voice before he even turns around. water bubbles in a pot on the stove, and the metallic beep from the open fridge has him rushing back to grab an egg before closing the door to keep the chill inside. “you’re not supposed to be up until later.”
you stubbornly shake your head. why are you up so early? or, at least, that’s what you mean to say. what comes out sounds more like, “so early, jay,” and you wince at the way sleep tugs at your vocal chords and slurs your words swollen around each syllable.
jay pauses to glance at you in surprise. a smile tugs at the corner of his mouth. he presses his lips together as if to prevent the grin from spreading across his cheeks. it never works, and it doesn’t now, but he drops his gaze and turns to busy himself with the stove. “if you go back to sleep,” he tries again, “i promise i’ll wake you in a couple minutes.”
“define a couple.” you make your way over to him while rubbing your eyes with your fist. “i don’t believe you.”
“you and me?” jay teases. and then with the same underlying amusement, “it tends to mean two.” he turns at your approach (you hear it from the shuffle of his feet against the floor), but something mustn’t be right because he lets out a yelp and the bowl in his hands clatters against the counter.
“yeah, right.” you stop rubbing your eyes only to feel jay's hands grasp at your shoulders to stop you from walking forward, and to turn you a few degrees to the right.
his gaze focuses on your once too-close proximity to the furniture, and a crooked smile endearingly tugs at the side of his mouth. “do you… like walking into chairs?”
you groan, and your head leans forward to fall into his shoulder. so warm. you instinctively nestle into the spot at the crook of his neck, and you allow your eyes to drift shut. “are you sure you don’t want to go back to sleep?”
jay's arms wrap around your waist, and he gently tugs you closer. when he speaks, he momentarily rests his head against yours. you can hear the reverberations of his voice against your skin, and the comfort from the gesture warms you. “tempting. but i wanted to do this more.”
“what’s that?”
jay presses his lips to your temple and untangles his arms from yours. he steps back to the kitchen counter to tap the egg against the side of the bowl. the shell cracks. yolk glistens in the mid-morning light and slips onto the warm rice below, and he rummages in the nearby drawer for chopsticks to mix everything together. “i wanted to make you breakfast,” he tries casually, but you don’t miss the shyness resting behind his tense shoulders.
you blink at him owlishly. “you don’t have to…”
jay firmly shakes his head and seasons the egg rice with furikake and soy sauce. “i want to. i know you’ve been busy, and you should eat something before you take your meds.”
“oh,” your stomach sinks. “i forgot to pick them up. i ran out a while ago.”
perhaps it’s a trick of the light, but you think jay flushes. “don’t worry, i picked them up this morning.”
your eyes widen. “what?”
“oh,” jay mumbles. “you mentioned you were running low.”
when you don’t say anything, jay starts rambling. “it’s in the bag on the counter. and, um, everything in there’s yours… i happened to see some stuff and thought of you.” his voice falters, and he places the bowl in front of you. “it’s not a big deal. i was up early anyway.”
you spot the paper bag on the counter and pull it toward you. when you look inside, you find a new prescription bottle as well as that snack you happened to buy at the pharmacy a few weeks ago. you remember making him try because it was really good.
“anyway,” jay smiles nervously as he hands you a cup of water, “here. i’m sorry, i was going to make tako sausage too, like i made for riki that one time, but i know you’re probably hungry. he said mine didn't really look like octopus because i didn't put eyes or a mouth on it, but i’ll do better and make it for you next time, promise!”
you slide down from the chair and step toward him. your bottom lip wobbles. before you know it, you’re rushing forward and hugging him tightly. “i can’t believe…” you sputter for words, “you’re so sweet. like all the time. how did you even?”
jay blinks in embarrassment, breathing a laugh. “it’s nothing. i told you, really.”
“it’s not nothing,” you mumble into his shoulder, “i’m going to cry.”
jay lifts you and sets you back on the chair. “don’t cry,” he pokes your cheek, “and i did it because i wanted to. now eat before your food gets cold.”
“i’m going to do something nice for you tomorrow morning, okay?”
jay just gazes at you fondly. “sure, you will.”
you scowl. “what’s that supposed to mean?”
“nothing.” and when jay laughs, this time he wraps his arms around your shoulders and presses a kiss to the edge of your jaw.
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TAGLIST : @star-sim @boyfiejay @jlheon @jwsdoll @dimplewonie @suneng @en-gelic
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shmaptainwrites · 8 months ago
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𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 [𝐉𝐀𝐌𝐄𝐒 𝐖𝐈𝐋𝐒𝐎𝐍]
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PAIRINGS — James Wilson x fem!Reader
SUMMARY — It was never Reader's plan to be a single mother to a newborn child, but a longtime friend steps in and before long they both have the family they've always wanted, the only catch: they're still just friends
WORD COUNT — 13.6K
WARNINGS — mentions of pregnancy and birth, breastfeeding (like non descriptive? does this need to be a warning?)
NOTE — Okay this fic has been in the works for a while and I have been swamped with school so I'm so happy I'm finally able to post something because it's literally been a full-ass month since I last came out with anything ._. hoping once finals are over I can get back into my writing groove and give some of my ideas the attention they deserve!
Middle photo credit goes to @shots-of-wilson-and-whiskey
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“Are you sure this is okay?” you looked back while holding a baby carrier in both hands. 
“Like I told you back at the hospital, and in the car, and then again in the car, I promise this is okay,” James assured you, following right behind, bags under each arm. “You just went through a 40 hour labour, did you really think it would be a smart move to come home alone?”
He was right about that, physically you were exhausted, you were sure how much longer you could keep your eyes open. 
“Go take a shower, I’ll look after her until you get out,” he suggested. “If you had a support person here you would have taken shifts.”
“I know, but you have a life James,” you sighed. “One that didn’t involve your friend getting pregnant and then taking care of her.”
“Would it make it any better if I told you I really don’t mind? I like spending time with you, it’s why we’ve been friends for so long,” he put the bags down by the table and then placed a hand on your shoulder. 
“James, I love you, but I’m going to be brutally honest because my filter has vanished. This is what happens to all your wives, all your girlfriends. I really don’t need that happening to us too,” you said. 
“It won’t,” he pressed. “Come on, just take the shower. I know you want to.”
You sighed, “Alright, but I’m not gonna call for you to come in the middle of the night and every which time of day. If you want to come and see us, do it of your own accord and if you don’t want to then don’t,” you emphasized. “Do what you want, not what you think I want.”
“If I say I will, will you go take a shower?” James asked and you rolled your eyes at him. 
“Don’t drop my baby while I’m in there, okay?” you pointed at him. “You still owe me for that vase you broke.” 
“You mean the tacky one your crappy ex-boyfriend’s mom gave you? I think I did you a favour there.” 
“You’re insufferable sometimes, you know?” you said carefully putting the carrier down in the living room and looking down at your resting daughter for a moment before heading towards your room. 
“I love you too,” he said simply, replacing you by her side and keeping a close eye on her while she slept. 
You had to admit, it was a relief to be able to step into the shower, knowing there was someone you trusted outside looking after the small human you were now fully responsible for. At least before dealing with the stress and everything that would come afterwards you’d be able to be clean. 
When you came out of your bedroom after your shower, dressed in the most comfortable clothes you could find lying around, you saw James in the kitchen, the carrier now propped up on the table while he unpacked something from some grocery bags. 
“I was craving Indian, do you want some?” he asked. 
“Of course I do, the food at your hospital sucks, hand it over,” you put your hand out and he gave you a bowl so you could serve yourself some rice and curry. “She’s still asleep?” 
“Woke up once, but I got her to fall back asleep pretty easily. She might get hungry soon though too.” 
“So I should eat while I still have the chance,” you sat down at the island and began munching on the food, turning around the carrier so you could see your daughter. 
It was interesting, she’d been around only for a short few days but you could barely ever take your eyes off her. 
“Did you pick a name for her yet?” James asked, leaning over the table and eating his portion of dinner. 
“I think so,” you nodded. “I was between two when she was born, but now that I look at her she fits one better than the other.” 
“So what’s the winner?” 
“Liana,” you smiled and brushed your fingers along her small curled toes. “It suits her doesn’t it?” 
“I think it does,” he nodded. “You made a pretty cute baby.” 
“I made a very cute baby, thank you very much,” you scoffed with a chuckle. “You think you could do better?” 
“Well I don’t have a uterus so I don’t think we’ll ever be able to find out,” he shook his head. “Shame, I probably would have demolished you.” 
“As if,” you laughed, continuing to eat more food just as Liana began to stir awake. “And there’s my cue.” 
You stood up and carefully took her out of the carrier, cautious of supporting her neck before moving over to the couch where you could comfortably feed her. 
“Once you’re done I’ll burp her,” James said. “So you can keep eating.” 
“Sure,” you nodded. “Got practice from your med school days?” 
“Yeah, actually,” he nodded. “I thought originally I might specialize in working in the NICU so I spent a lot of time in the maternity ward.” 
“What made you change your mind?” you asked. 
“I would have burnt out,” he admitted. “Seeing babies and spending time with them is one thing, but seeing them sick and sometimes not get better? It’s a lot harder than you’d imagine.” 
You hummed thoughtfully, “You would have been good in that department if you decided to go that route. I think at least.” 
“Really, why do you think so?” 
“James, you’ve always been great with kids and parents. Don’t you remember how we met?” 
He chuckled to himself, “Summer camp days. Yeah, you really did have to know your way around both.” 
“You somehow managed, as a nineteen-year-old, to calm a child who was freaking out about staying away from home and dealing with an unhappy parent of a different child. I think your people skills just got better as you got older.” 
“I don’t think there’s much in life that trains you to deal with crises as much as being a camp counsellor.” 
“You can test your skills with Liana and see if you’ve still got the magic when it comes to babies,” you teased, followed by a yawn. 
“Trust me, I definitely do,” he assured you. “Babies love me.”
“And do you love babies?”
“I do, and I think I’m gonna end up loving yours a little more than most,” he admitted. 
“Good, she’s gonna need it,” you sighed. “I’m gonna need it.”
There was a pause for a moment before James spoke up again,
“Have you talked to him since the break up?” he asked and you shook your head, feeling the tears develop in your eyes. 
“I don’t really want to talk about it, not right now,” you whispered, looking down at Liana again. 
James did not peg your boyfriend as the abandoning type, but after he had coaxed the news out of you during one of your visits, he could see how much it crushed you to think of what lied ahead. Not because you didn’t want a child, but because Liana was all you wanted and you thought you were on the same page as your partner, but when it came down to things he couldn’t hold up the mask he’d been wearing any longer. 
“You should talk about it sometime though, right?” James said softly. “Doesn’t have to be with me, but you’ve been so laser focused on getting through the past nine months you haven’t really processed what happened.”
Liana had since finished feeding and you carried her over to the kitchen island, passing James a burp cloth that he could drape across his shoulder before taking her from your hands, after you pressed a small kiss to her forehead. 
“Not sure if I want to process it,” you admitted. “I’d rather focus on her.”
“And I’d rather you take care of yourself so you don’t crash and burn,” he said. 
You knew he was right, but it was nicer to pretend you were alone from start to finish than even imagining the possibility that someone was supposed to be with you through everything. The doctors appointments, the morning sickness, the preparation. 
Instead you ended up feeling like a burden to your friends who had gone out of their way to help you and be there for you. 
“Okay,” you nodded simply. “I’ll do it for you and her then.”
“It’ll end up being for you in the end,” he assured. “But just…trust me on this okay?”
“I do,” you smiled. “Just like I trust you with her.”
You finished eating your dinner while James took care of Liana and even managed to get her to go back to sleep. It seemed that even though she’d only been in the world a short while, she felt just as safe in his arms as she did in yours.
“You can put her down if you want. I have a cot set up in my room,” you pointed. 
“I’m alright like this,” he shook his head. “I’ll hold her until you’re done then I’ll leave you guys so you can get some sleep.”
Considering how hungry you were, it didn't take that much longer for you to finish eating and while you cleared up the dishes, James went and put Liana down in her bed and then gathered his things so he could give you some time alone. 
“I’ll see you around, James. Thanks for coming to help today,” you gave him a big hug and he held you tight in that way he would when he wanted to say something, but knew it should probably wait. 
“Anytime,” he gave you an additional squeeze. “You’re gonna be a great mom. You are a great mom already. I’m really happy for you.” 
You couldn’t bring yourself to say any words in response so you just nodded your head and held onto him tighter. After a moment he pulled away and pressed a quick kiss to your cheek. 
“Love you, now go get some sleep.” 
“You’ve got it Dr. Wilson,” you saluted him. 
You walked him out of the door and after closing it shut behind him you took a deep breath. It was going to be hard, but you could do it. 
A few months later…
“Don’t you have a life?” you yawned, bouncing Liana in your arms to try and get her to fall asleep. 
“I mean I went bowling with House last night and I consistently stay late at work, and that’s about it, so no,” James shook his head. 
“So you figured that coming and bothering me is a good use of your spare time.” 
“I wouldn’t call it bothering,” James gave you a look. “I made you dinner.” 
“Yeah you did, and unfortunately it was really good too,” you sighed. “So you just want to hang out with me and Liana?”
“Yeah, is that so hard to believe?”
“A little considering I always have baby vomit on me now,” you chuckled. 
“It brings out your eyes,” he teased. “Here, why don’t I take her.”
“Last time I agreed to that you riled her up, which I didn’t think was possible for a three month old,” you eyed him skeptically. 
“I promise I’ll put her to sleep,” he crossed his heart. 
“Wrong religion, James,” you shook your head and he laughed. 
“Do you want me to swear on the Torah?”
“It would help,” you nodded. 
“Alright, I swear on the Torah that I won’t rile her up.”
You reluctantly passed Liana over to James and scoffed when she almost immediately stopped fussing. 
“See,” he smiled and kissed her small nose while he rocked her gently, making her eyes slowly close as she fell asleep. 
“You two are in kahoots. She’s fine whenever you’re not around, but when you are it’s like she knows she can get passed off to you if she’s fussy enough,” you laughed a little. “It’s cute though, I like how much she likes you.”
“Me too, why do you think I keep coming here?” 
“So you came to visit, what do you want to do?” you asked. “My plans were to clean the kitchen and do laundry, so not much more exciting than sitting around at home.”
“Why don’t you let me put her down then we can tackle the kitchen together. I mean I did make half of the mess there.”
“I won’t argue with you there,” you sighed and put your hands on your hips. “Okay, I’m gonna throw a load in before you put her down.” 
It took a little bit for James to be confident Liana was fully asleep before putting her down in her cot and then meeting you again in the kitchen where you were packing up leftovers from dinner. 
“Have you had many visitors?” James asked. 
“Well, I do have this one guy that keeps coming around, about this tall, practicing oncology, I think he’s a little bit obsessed with me,” you joked. 
“Aside from me,” he shook his head and went over to the dishes. 
“Yeah, a few. My parents were here for a bit while you were out of town and then some of my friends have come around to help with a few things here and there and to meet Liana.”
“Nice.”
“You sound like you want to say something,” you looked back at him. 
“It’s not too much having me over all the time, is it?”
“No, not at all,” you shook your head. “You know me, I’d tell you if it was.”
“Because I really do like spending time with you both. It’s a lot nicer than going to an empty house at the end of the day,” he admitted. “So if you don’t mind, maybe I can keep bothering you and making a mess in your kitchen.”
“I think that would be okay,” you smiled. 
You cleaned in silence for a bit before James began asking a few questions about Liana. 
“She had an appointment with her pediatrician recently, right? Everything went okay?”
“Yeah, fit as a fiddle,” you sighed. “Thank goodness.”
“Have you decided if you’re gonna use formula yet? Or will you wait it out?”
“I was actually going to ask you about this, whenever I ask anyone I think has an opinion I’d like to hear they say I need to make the decision myself and then everyone I don’t want to hear from seems to have something to say,” you chuckled. “What do you think? As a doctor?”
“I mean, if I were in your situation I might wait a bit longer, she’s still pretty young and there’s no real reason to switch over yet. I think a lot of people start maybe around 12 months and from what I’ve seen that works well,” he shrugged. 
“Thanks for giving me a straight answer,” you placed a hand on his arm. “I also don’t know if I should try and take leave from work or hire a nanny, but I think I probably have to figure that one out myself.”
“Do you have enough savings to take the time off?” he asked. 
“I get a few more months paid leave from the company I work for since I have seniority, but after that I have to figure out what to do. I think I have enough saved to last me some time, but I’m going to have to go back eventually.”
James hummed thoughtfully. 
“Do you wanna come up with solutions tonight or relax now that we’ve finished cleaning?” he asked, motioning his head to the kitchen that was definitely in better shape than before. 
“Let’s watch a movie or something, I don’t think I’ve turned the TV on since Liana was born. I’ll fold the laundry when it’s done while we watch,” you said. “I’ll figure something out later.”
“We should watch, oh jeez what’s that thing we started ages ago and never finished?”
“The really bad soap?” you asked and he nodded, “Oh yes, we’re definitely watching that.”
“Okay, you go get settled, I’m gonna make some tea, do you want some?”
“Sure, just make me whatever you’re having,” you nodded and grabbed the remote from under the pile of blankets on the couch, turning on the TV and trying to find the episodes you had recorded to watch later. 
By the time James had finished making the tea, you had found the show and were just about to start it. 
“Here,” James passed you the mug. “So what was the last thing that happened?”
“I think the main guy was sleeping with the head nurse, right and then there was the whole thing with her being engaged to the other surgeon and then her sister was in a coma?” 
“Wait, I thought the surgeon she was engaged to was sleeping with one of his patients?” 
“He was,” you nodded. “It was a whole thing.”
“Alright, just start it, I’m sure I’ll remember more as we watch.”
James was very sorely mistaken, if anything he’d gotten more confused and you were absolutely no help because nothing was making sense anymore. 
“What is up with the writing?” you asked. “Like did they just completely forget they had a whole storyline dedicated to this huge procedure and now they’re acting like nothing happened.”
“Don’t get me started, that guy was doing surgery without gloves, like that doesn’t even take much effort to get right. You’d think it was common sense,” James added. 
“Maybe we should turn it off,” you looked over at your friend, “it’s getting us all riled up.”
James pressed his lips together, “I know, but I kind of want to find out who’s the father of Paula’s baby.”
You leaned back into the couch, you had managed to fold all the laundry, and it was still a little too early to go to sleep, you supposed a few more episodes couldn’t hurt. 
“If I fall asleep, just lock up on your way out, okay?” you looked over at him and he nodded as you started the next episode. 
Just as you predicted, about halfway through the second episode you began to drift off, and as soon as James noticed, he stopped the episode already having decided you could finish it together another time. 
He shifted you slightly so you were lying down on the couch instead of in the uncomfortable position you were in before, placing a blanket over top of you. He leaned down and pressed a kiss to your cheek, wishing you a good night before going to check on Liana, and after seeing she was sleeping soundly and the baby monitor was on, he saw himself out, taking your spare key from where it was hidden on the porch and locking the door. 
“How’s my girl doing?” James grinned, scooping Liana out of your arms. “I haven’t seen you in so long,” he kissed her nose making her giggle. 
“James, you were here two days ago,” you laughed. 
“And it feels like an eternity.”
You crossed your arms over your chest, “She’s got you wrapped around her finger.”
“I don’t mind,” he shrugged. “Just as long as we get to spend time together.”
“Yeah, well she hasn’t napped yet so it can wait until after that,” you reached to take her back but James insisted he could put her to sleep. “James, you just got off work are you sure you don’t want to eat something or take a break for a bit?”
“This is like a break for me,” he assured you. 
“Okay, I’m gonna make a salad, come out and eat when you’re done.”
James nodded and went off to the bedroom so he could sit on the armchair there and coax her to sleep. 
Usually he didn’t need more than twenty minutes to half an hour to put her down, so when you were hitting the forty-five minute mark you wondered if Liana was being fussy, so you went to check in on them, instead seeing James fast asleep on the armchair with Liana snuggled against his chest. 
You bit back a big smile and went to go grab your camera quickly, and quietly snapped a shot of the two of them. 
Not wanting to wake either of them, you made your way back to the kitchen, shutting the door of the room behind you to make sure the sound didn’t travel. 
Figuring it might be a while before James came back out, you decided to eat your dinner, that way you could take Liana from him when they woke up so he could get something to eat too. 
As you had predicted, James exited the room about an hour later, Liana now awake and hungry for her own dinner. 
“Want me to take her now?” you teased and he rolled his eyes while you took your baby from him, sitting on the couch to feed her while he grabbed himself something to eat. “You had a good nap?”
“Great actually, I think I needed it. Been pulling a lot of late nights at the office getting paperwork done,” he admitted. “I’m surprised you didn’t wake me.”
“You looked comfortable, I didn’t want to bother you.”
“Well, I appreciate it cause I needed the sleep,” he sighed and came and sat next to you while he began to eat his dinner. 
“James, I…I tried to talk to him the other week,” you said, knowing he would be able to connect the dots back to your ex. “I’d been meaning to tell you, it just slipped my mind I guess.”
“You did…what did he say?”
“God, I’m gonna start crying again,” you let out a humourless chuckle and lifted a hand to wipe away the tears beginning to form in your eyes. “It doesn’t matter what he said. What matters is that it was probably good that we broke up. He wouldn’t have been a good father or husband for that matter when it came down to it.”
“I’m proud of you for reaching out anyways. It takes a lot of guts to do that after someone leaves you.”
You nodded your head, “I’m just…I know I said you should keep coming here because you want to, but I really do like having you around. It just makes it seem simpler. Easier,” you looked over at him. “You’re a good friend Jamie, I love you.”
“Love you too,” he leaned over and pressed a kiss to your forehead, watching as your attention turned back to your daughter as she finished feeding. 
You held her just like that in your arms for a little while longer, watching as she reached out for your fingers and then tried to go even further to grab James. Clearly her attention was addictive because he was ready to put his food down to help burp her, but you made a teasing remark about him hogging her and that he needed to eat his food so you’d take care of it and he could have her when he was done. 
Eventually, you traded Liana for James’ dishes and went to load the dishwasher while he kept her occupied, letting her gnaw on his tie while making all sorts of nonsensical baby noises that James took as conversation starters. 
It was funny to watch the two have what looked like a full blown conversation and you were sure James had been reading some parenting magazine or another that spoke of helping babies develop linguistic abilities. 
“Hey James,” you crossed your arms over your chest, leaning against the wall. 
“Yeah?”
“Do you want a key?”
“A key to what?” he looked at you confused. 
“The house,” you said. “I just thought since you’re here all the time you can come and go whenever you want and if you forget something and I’m out you can come get it yourself.”
“A key,” he thought about it. “This feels like a big milestone moment.”
“I mean I already have the key to your place, but that was because you refused to have anyone look after you after you got your wisdom teeth removed.”
“Wait, you have my key?” 
“Yeah, I just took yours and had it copied,” you shrugged. 
“I feel like I should be a bit more concerned about this, but I’m not.”
“It’s because you’re friends with House, you’re used to it,” you waved him off. 
“Liana, did you know your mom’s a thief?” he looked down at the baby in his arms and you rolled your eyes. 
“Do you want the key or not?” 
“I’ll take it, and I guess you can keep mine, but I’m never there anyways.”
“It’s okay, I’ll just use it if I need to steal your social insurance card to commit identity theft.”
“Liana banana, your mom’s being very silly tonight,” James picked her up and held her out in front of him before bringing her down to press a few kisses to her face, making her giggle. “It’s okay, we still love mommy even though she’s silly, right?”
“You better,” you flicked his shoulder as you walked by after grabbing an ice cream sandwich from the freezer. 
“Hey, I’ve got something in my bag I forgot to give you, do you mind bringing it over here?” James asked, motioning to the briefcase on the armchair closest to the front door. 
You nodded your head and stood up again to grab it and pass it to him. He rummaged through it with one hand while still holding Liana before passing you what looked like a receipt. 
“Uh thanks?” you looked a little confused. 
“Read what it’s for,” James chuckled. “They’ll get delivered next week.” 
“James,” you put the receipt down. “You didn’t.” 
“You’ve been talking about it for four months, I had to do something,” he shrugged. “And I didn’t get you anything for your baby shower.” 
“Because you planned it,” you laughed. “Seriously this is a lot. I don’t know if I can accept this.” 
“Just think of it this way. I’m here all the time, we like to go out with Liana together and it’s a great stroller with good safety ratings.” 
“Okay sure you’ll use that, but the cot too?” 
“The one you have in there’s been recalled, I was just doing you a favour,” he said. 
You chuckled a little, pressing your lips together. “Liana, my darling, we are very spoiled.” 
“I’ll come over when it gets delivered and help set it up,” James said. 
“I still don’t know what to say, James, this is…really generous of you.” 
“Believe me, right now nothing makes me happier, and I mean that,” he reached out a hand to you and you took it, giving it a gentle squeeze. 
As promised, the next week James was back at your home to help set up the stroller and the cot and you figured it would be the right time to pull out that camcorder your father had gotten you to help record some memories you were making with Liana. 
“Hey, James wanna tell the camera what you’re doing?” 
“Wondering why I didn’t get a degree in engineering apparently.” he mumbled while hunched over some instructions, a pencil behind his ear and his sleeves rolled up to his elbows. 
“What does your assistant think?” you moved the camera over to Liana, sitting in a rocking seat that was propped up next to James. 
“That this video isn’t going to be very good for my image in the future. This stuff is worse than IKEA,” he scratched the back of his head. 
“You’re doing great,” you assured him and came to give him an encouraging side hug. “Alright, let me stop this video and we can try and tackle it together.” 
You put the camera down on the bed and looked over the instructions with James, having a bit of an easier time piecing things together compared to him, so in the end you were put on deciphering the instructions while he assembled the cot. 
An embarrassing amount of time later, the cot was completely assembled (only after having to disassemble it all the first time because there was one piece left over and you had no idea what step you had missed using it), and you carefully placed Liana inside to see how it would hold up. 
“You know they say you can be proud of something you built with your own two hands, but I’m afraid this is going to fall apart,” James said. 
“We followed the instructions really carefully, it should be fine,” you said, trying to convince yourself. “And Liana looks comfortable in there, look at her she’s giggling.” 
“I think that’s because we look like we’ve been building a house or something,” he looked between you, seeing your dirty clothes and messed up hair. 
“Who knew putting together a cot would be so labour intensive,” you chuckled. “I think we can safely say we deserve some takeout. What do you want?” 
“Anything, I’m starving,” James sat down on the edge of the bed. “You think this will help her sleep a little better?” 
“Let’s hope so,” you rubbed your temples. “You coming?” you asked, taking Liana out of the cot and carrying her out towards the door. 
“Yeah, I’ll be out in a minute,” he nodded and you left him in the room, staring at the wooden baby’s bed in front of him. It was a simple thing you had both made together, but for James, it was starting to feel like so much more than just that. 
You built a cot, but what did building a cot mean? What did it mean that he bought it for you without a second question or a moment’s hesitation? What did it mean that he couldn’t seem to wipe the smile off his face every single time he stepped into this house? 
It probably meant a lot of things, but at the moment, to James, it felt like he had a family and he’d hold onto that for as long as he was able to. 
As much as you wished it could be, not every day was easy. Today was one of those days at the end of a long week and you wanted nothing more than to collapse and call it quits. 
Something was wrong with Liana, she was never this fussy, but all the doctors would just repeat the same thing over and over again. 
She has colic. 
You have a colic-y baby. 
Your baby has colic. She’s going to be fine.
She didn’t sound fine. Not when she would cry and cry and you didn’t know what was happening or how to make her feel better. It made your heart feel tight and constricted especially when all you could do was bounce and rock her in hopes that it might soothe whatever was going on inside her. 
You were so focused on the sounds of the crying baby you didn’t hear the door unlock as James entered the house. After putting down his bags, he followed the sound of the crying before finding you in the rocking chair in your room, gently hushing Liana to try and coax her back to sleep. 
“James,” you tried to stand up when you noticed he was there, but he rushed over to your side, placing a hand on your shoulder and encouraging you to sit back down. “I’m afraid we’re not really having a fun day today. You might want to just go home and rest,” you suggested. 
“What’s going on?” he asked. 
“James, I’m serious I-,” 
“Hey,” he said gently, quieting you as a hand came to hold your cheek. “Talk to me, mom. What’s happening?” 
You pressed your lips together and shook your head. 
“I don’t know,” you let the tears spill from your eyes, just as they were for Liana, but you basked in the comfort James’ simple action offered. “She just keeps crying and I don’t know what’s wrong. T-They kept saying she has colic, but this isn’t colic, James.” 
He nodded his head and wiped away your tears while trying to think of a solution to the problem in front of you. 
“I have an idea, just give me a second, I’ll be right back.” 
James went off to the kitchen and came back with a bit of a white powder on his finger. He helped you sit Liana up before getting her to eat a little bit of it. 
“What is that?” 
“Just baking soda. I saw this in a few babies. Doctors think it’s colic, but it’s reflux. Have you been eating anything different from usual?” he asked. 
“Me?” 
“Yeah, it might be something she’s allergic to getting in the breast milk,” he explained while rubbing Liana’s back. “Here let me take her so you can have a break. Go to the kitchen, get some water and write down a list of what you’ve been eating recently and we’ll go over it and see if we can find anything that lines up with her fussiness.” 
“Are you sure?” 
“I’ll survive,” he nodded. 
You passed over your baby to him and made your way out of the room, following James’ suggestion and noticing how with a little bit of time her crying had quieted down and instead was replaced by softer sniffles and a much nicer sound. It drew you away from the list you were leaning over and back to the door of the bedroom where you leaned in the frame and watched and listened while James, with his back turned to you, sang a soft lullaby to Liana. 
I love you forever, I’ll like you for always, as long as I’m living, my baby you’ll be.
Over and over like a prayer until Liana’s sniffles had faded and there was only silence. 
He carefully put her back in her bed, waiting a few moments to make sure she was really sleeping, before turning back and seeing you standing in the doorway. 
When he made his way up to you, you reached out and pulled him into as tight of a hug as you’d ever given him. You held onto the sleeves of your shirt while one arm came under his and across his back with the other around his neck, holding him as close to you as you possibly could. 
“You okay?” James asked and you nodded your head, silently while a few more tears streamed down your face. 
“I will be.” 
“I-,” James faltered for a moment, but he said it anyway. “I love you.” 
“I love you too.” 
Three words he had said so many times, that had meant a particular thing when he said them to you, but now he couldn’t help but feel like they meant something a little different. 
You both stayed like that a moment longer before you pulled apart, wiping away your tears and going back to your list to see if James’ theory could be correct. 
“Maybe try cutting these ones out of your diet,” he suggested. “See if she gets any better and if not call me and I’ll get her an appointment with one of the pediatricians at the hospital.” 
“Okay,” you nodded. “I just don’t get why they kept saying colic like is that just some doctor term for I don’t know what’s wrong, but your baby is fussy?” 
“I don’t know,” James shook his head, “but don’t ever let anyone bully you into not trusting your gut. She’s your daughter and you know her best.” 
“You seem to know her pretty well too. You took one look at her and managed to help her when I couldn’t,” you pinched the bridge of your nose. 
“Coincidence,” he patted your shoulder. 
“Give yourself a little credit. You’re with her a lot too, it’s part of why I trust your judgement so much when it comes to her. I know you’re not just going to tell me some medical mumbo jumbo you…you’re with her, you see how she is, you know.” 
“I don’t know how you managed to hold it together so well,” James said. “I was in there with her for twenty minutes and I wanted to cry right with her.” 
“It’s so hard,” you shook your head. “You can tell she’s uncomfortable, that something’s wrong, but she can’t tell you what.” 
James nodded his head, “Before you know it she’ll be walking and talking and hopefully it’ll be a lot easier to understand what she needs.” 
“It’s hard to imagine that,” you chuckled. “She is growing so fast though.” 
“And you’re doing a great job,” James wrapped an arm around your shoulder and you took a deep breath. You wanted to correct him and say ‘we’re doing a great job’, but everything about this felt so delicate. It wasn’t his responsibility to parent Liana and you didn’t want to pressure him into thinking that it had become that, but regardless you felt like he’d been around so much it would be wrong to give yourself full credit for everything. 
“It takes a village,” you settled on saying, extending your arm so it was wrapped around him as well. “Speaking of a village, I need to hire a nanny.” 
“So you’re going to go back to work?” he asked and you nodded. 
“Just part time for now. Pay is good enough. I should be fine with that for a while.” 
“Good,” James nodded. “Do you need help going through resumes?” 
“Nah, Janine is taking care of that for me, her boyfriend works with the police so free background checks. She’s gonna send me a short list and then I’ll interview them.” 
You looked up at James and chuckled, 
“You seem surprised.” 
“I didn’t know you outsourced to other people too,” he teased. 
“Are you jealous, Jamie?” you tickled his sides a little bit. “Come on, you know you’re my number one. Can you seriously tell me you could have gotten police-level background checks on nannies?” 
“I could have tried.” 
“I appreciate the sentiment, but I’m gonna save you from this job so you can help me with other stuff, okay?” you turned him around and patted his chest. “I love you, James, but you can’t do it all. I have to look out for you too.” 
“You don’t have to look after me,” he assured you. “You’ve got a lot on your plate, I can take care of myself.” 
“James, that’s the whole point of this,” you pointed between you. “I’m not about to let it be one-sided.” 
“Is that why you keep packing me lunches?” he asked. 
“Maybe,” you shrugged. “And it's kind of fun leaving you little notes.” 
“House thinks I’m seeing someone because of what you put in the last one. He steals my food, you know.” 
“I’ll just pack double next time,” you laughed. 
James smiled at the sound of your laughter, savouring the moment of levity he was able to bring you after a long and hard few days. 
You looked back up at him once your laughter had died down and filled with a quiet sense of gratitude, you could help but lean into his side, sighing contentedly and it made you feel warm to the touch when his arm wrapped around you and pulled you in closer. 
Things may not have been simple or easy, but at least they felt right.
James was just about to leave his office to get some food in the cafeteria when he heard the phone ring, keeping him seated at his desk so he could answer. 
“Hello, Oncology Department. Dr. James Wilson speaking.”
“James, it’s me,” you said quickly, almost like you were in a hurry. 
“Is something wrong?” he asked. 
“Nothing dire,” you sighed. “My nanny got sick and my backup nanny is out of town and I have this huge meeting at work I cannot miss, but I-I don’t have anyone to look after Liana. I hate to ask this, you know I wouldn’t bug you unless it was a real emergency, but can I bring her by? Just for two maybe three hours tops. Then I’ll come grab her and she can be in my office with me for the rest of the day.”
“Yeah, of course, bring her over,” James nodded. “I have a few patient consults today, but nothing too strenuous or contagious for a small baby.”
“James, are you sure? I feel really bad asking-,”
“It’s fine. Today was going to be boring anyway, I could use some Liana time to spice things up.”
“James, I love you, you’re a lifesaver,” you breathed a sigh of relief. “I owe you one okay? Cash it in whenever.”
“I’ll keep that in mind,” he chuckled. “I’m gonna go grab a quick bite to eat. I’ll meet you in my office when you come.”
“Great, see you then.”
You both hung up and when James came back upstairs you were just arriving at his office with Liana strapped in her car seat and a bag slung around your shoulder. 
“Okay, I’ve got snacks, and a carrier, and her toys, and-,”
“Goodness, take a breath,” James chuckled. “We’re gonna be fine, I’ve looked after her before.” 
“I know, I know. I’m just nervous about this meeting and rushing around to get everything prepped and then the nannies fell through,” you took a deep breath to try and slow your heart down and James put a hand on your shoulder assuring you everything was going to be alright. 
“You’re gonna kill it at that meeting, alright?” he pulled you in for a quick hug. 
“Thanks again, I seriously appreciate and love you and your big fat heart.” 
“Thanks, I think,” he chuckled again. “I love you too.”
You kissed your hand and tapped it on his cheek before doing the same for Liana who smiled and James took a moment to stare out the door and watch you as you left the room, still feeling his heart beating a little faster after having said I love you. 
Ever since the day he came over when Liana was having a hard time, his heart would race and his palms would get sweaty every time he’d say those three words, knowing he meant it in a different way than he had been saying it all these years. 
“Liana banana, what am I gonna do,” James sighed and bent down so he was at eye level with her. “Do you think your mom knows?”
Liana babbled a response. 
“Me neither,” he sighed. “It’s okay though, cause we’re gonna have a fun day right?”
He unclipped her from the seat after fastening the baby carrier to his back to begin with before propping her up and clipping her inside. 
Once he was content with that, he checked the time and noticed he was almost late for a meeting with a patient who was staying at the hospital for treatment. 
James made his way down the halls, knowing not many would question him about the baby on his back, that was aside from his boss who now seemed to be walking directly towards him. 
He quickly took a detour into an empty room and thinking he lost her, let out a breath only to be startled when the door opened and Cuddy was standing in front of him. 
“Wilson,” she started. 
“Mhmm.”
“What’s on your back?” she asked, trying to get a better look, but James simply turned around.
“Oh it’s just a backpack,” he lied, only to be immediately ratted out by Liana’s nonsensical sounds. 
“You have a talking backpack?” Cuddy looked at him skeptically. 
“No, it’s a tumour. I’m dying,” he lied again, even more poorly than before.
Cuddy sighed, “Are we gonna get sued for it?” 
James pressed his lips together and shook his head. 
“Will someone get mad at you for it?”
He shook his head again.
“Is House involved?”
A third time. 
“Okay,” she nodded slowly. “I won’t question your…talking backpack tumour.”
James nodded his head and Cuddy left the room which hopefully meant he was in the clear for the rest of the day. 
Liana had other ideas and decided she didn’t like being in the carrier on his back anymore and began to cry. James wondered what was different, he’d done this with her before, but perhaps it was the new environment and she just wanted to be where she could see him.
So after some maneuvering, he changed the positioning of the carrier and put Liana back inside and she seemed much more relaxed afterwards. 
When he got to his patient he apologized for being late, but they were more focused on the child that James had yet to introduce. 
“Sorry, I’m a little all over the place right now,” he chuckled. “This is Liana, she’s going to be joining us today.”
“Is she your daughter?” he asked, seeing the way James smiled and held her when he introduced her. 
“No,” James shook his head. “She’s the daughter of one of my close friends. I’m just doing her a favour today.”
“Either way, it’s always nice to see someone smiling and happy around here.”
“Yeah, I thought so too,” James nodded. 
“How old is she?”
“Six months as of two weeks ago.”
“They grow fast, don’t they?”
James smiled and nodded, “They sure do.”
They continued their consult, and before long James wrapped things up and headed back to his office to meet with another patient. 
This time around he was feeding and burping Liana throughout the meeting and it felt so much like second nature to him, it didn’t take him away at all from the questions the patient was asking, and much like he expected, having a baby in the room was a nice distraction from the heavy subject matter. 
He got through the next few patients with ease, and he felt lucky that House only decided to come in after all his meetings were over. 
“Is that a baby?” House squinted, looking at Liana who was calmly playing with a toy in James’ lap. 
“No, it’s an alien,” he deadpanned and House ignored his comment. 
“Why do you have a baby? That must be breaking some hospital rule.”
“Since when do you care about rules?”
“Cause rules are there to protect us,” House said sarcastically. “Is this the one you spend all your free time with?”
“Her name is Liana,” James said while standing up and moving to put her in her car seat for a moment. “House, I’m gonna ask you to do something and I’m going to trust that you won’t blow this up in my face.”
“Go on.”
“I need to use the washroom, but you’ve seen the way they get cleaned here, I don’t want to bring Li with me,” he said. “Can you watch her for five minutes? You don’t even have to do anything, just stare at her in the carrier.”
House thought about it for a moment before eventually agreeing, James completely oblivious to his friend’s ulterior motive.
House first sat across from her, turning her car seat around on the table so it was facing him. They stared at each other for a few moments before House stood up and grabbed a picture from one of James’ shelves, sitting back down in front of her. 
“You’re probably too young to do this, but never too young to learn, right?”
Liana had no response. 
“You see this guy?” House pointed to James in the photo. “He’s dada, right?”
House continued to prompt her, even though he knew she was too young to speak, thinking this would make a great prank if he played his cards right. 
House continued to go back and forth with Liana between her babbles, until he heard James begin to open the door of the office. 
“Everything okay?” he asked. 
“Perfect,” House nodded. “Your daughter’s an angel.” 
James frowned, unable to tell if House was being sarcastic or not, but he was quickly distracted by the frame in his hand.
“Why do you have that picture?” James came closer and took it from him.
“Oh, just trying to pass the time with a story.” 
“The story of what exactly? This is just a picture of me with my parents.” 
“I don’t know I made something up, she’s a baby, she won’t remember,” House insisted before leaving the office before James could ask any more questions. 
A little confused by the encounter, he made his way over to Liana who was reaching out for him. 
He checked the time, seeing as your meeting should probably have been over by then and decided to give you a call. 
“Hey, I was just about to come and pick Liana up,” you said. 
“Yeah, about that, do you just want to leave her with me for the rest of the day?” he asked. “She’s been really good and honestly I think the patients have been loving seeing a baby around.” 
“James, it’s fine, my meeting is over. I can come get her,” you said. 
James pressed his lips together before gathering the nerve to say what he was going to say. 
“I actually would really like it if she could stay with me,” he said. “If you’re okay with it.”
You paused, “This isn’t just some round about way for you to find a way to give me a break?” you asked. 
“No, I’m really happy she’s here. I was going to come over after work anyways.” 
“You still have the car seat hookup in your car?” you asked and he confirmed. “Okay, call me if you need anything, Jamie.” 
“I will, and thank you.” 
“Just don’t break her, okay, she’s not replaceable,” you teased. 
“I’ll bring her back in one piece,” James chuckled. “We’ll be fine, right Li?” 
James gave her a little tickle so that you could hear her laugh in response and you couldn't help but smile before saying goodbye and feeling more at ease leaving her with James than you ever had leaving her with a babysitter. 
It always felt interesting coming back to Princeton-Plainsboro after you had given birth to Liana. It brought back a lot of memories, both good and maybe not so great of your pregnancy, but recently you and Liana had been visiting a little more often to have lunch with James when you weren’t working. 
Today wasn’t one of those days, you were actually just on your way back home after running a few errands and since you were in the area you thought you might stop in and talk to James about that evening. 
When you went by his office you peeked inside and noticed he wasn’t there and before you could decide the best course of action, you heard a semi familiar voice behind you. 
“You looking for Wilson?” 
You turned around and saw House standing in front of you. 
“Yeah, actually. Do you know where he is?” 
“I think he just went to Cuddy’s office,” he said. 
“Alright, I’ll head back downstairs then,” you smiled and were about to haul Liana’s car seat with you, but House stopped you. 
“If you want I can look after her in my office,” he said.
“Really?” you seemed a little surprised from the offer, but figured it couldn’t be too bad to leave her with him for five minutes. 
“Sure,” House nodded, making it seem like it was no big deal, when really he had already pocketed a picture of James and was looking for another opportunity to continue his prank. 
“Alright, I’ll be back in a few minutes,” you said while walking over to his office and putting her car seat on the main table before walking down the hallways and over to the elevator to go and find James, but just to your luck, he was coming out just as you had planned to enter. “Hey, I was looking for you,” you smiled. 
“Oh, I didn’t realize you were coming, did we make plans?” he asked, worried he’d forgotten about something. 
“No, I was just in the area and, well my mom and dad are coming over for dinner tonight, I was wondering if you wanted to join us.” 
“Dinner sounds nice,” James nodded. “And I haven’t seen your parents in a while, I just seem to miss them every time they come into town.” 
“Yeah, that’s why I thought I’d ask, also maybe as a warning in case you wanted to get as far away as you could,” you chuckled. 
“Come on, they’re not that bad,” he nudged you. 
“Most of the time, but then again, you’re not their child.” 
“Wait, where’s Liana?” James asked. “With a sitter at home?” 
“No, I left her with House.” 
James’ eyes went wide, “You left her with House?”
“Yeah, what’s the big deal?” you chuckled as James began to walk towards House’s office to make sure he wasn’t up to one of his many schemes. “James he offered!” you called back and that only made him walk faster. 
It took you a minute to catch up with him, but by that time he was already interrogating House who was simply sitting in front of Liana. 
“Can't I offer to look after my friend’s friend’s baby?” House asked. 
“Usually someone could, but when that person is you you may see why I think you have some ulterior motive.” 
“James what’s going on?” you asked, coming closer to House. “Liana’s fine, I don’t know why you’re being so dramatic.” 
“Yeah, listen to single mom over here,” he pointed to you. 
James backed off if only for your sake, but he still kept a close eye on House as you picked up Liana’s car seat and told James you’d see him after his shift was over. 
He nodded his head and you exchanged a kiss on the cheek before heading out. 
“You’re really telling me you’re not getting some of that on the side?” House asked. 
“House, drop it,” James was unamused. “I know you’re up to something, I just don’t know what.” 
“I guess you’re just going to have to wait and find out,” House shrugged. “In the meantime may I suggest you go get your freak on with the mom? You know she probably hasn’t slept with anyone since that kid was conceived, I’m sure you’d have an easy time convincing her.” 
“Shut up, House,” James rolled his eyes and left the office before he could suggest anything more obscene. 
He was thankful when the end of his shift came, and before heading to your place he made a stop at the store to buy some flowers and dessert to bring over. 
By this point, it was such a habit, he never knocked, just opened the door with his key and announced his presence to whoever was in the house. 
“Hey Liana, look who’s here,” you smiled and pointed to James while Liana was being held by your mother. 
Liana became very excited at the sight of him and he quickly put down the things he brought on the table before saying his greetings and giving special attention to Liana by means of a kiss on her nose and caress of her face. 
“Do you want something to drink?” you asked. “Mom and dad brought some fancy-looking sparkling fruit juice.” 
“I could go for some of that,” James nodded. “How have you guys been, I missed you the last time you were in town.” 
“We’ve been good,” your dad nodded. 
“Unfortunately our granddaughter doesn’t come to visit us very much,” your mom gave you a bit of a look and you rolled your eyes. 
“Mom, you guys are retired, I have a job, why don’t we keep this ‘you visit me’ arrangement a while longer until my life sorts itself out a bit more.” 
“She’s not wrong, honey,” your dad came and patted his wife’s shoulder. 
“I know, I just wish we got to see Liana more. We should come down more often.” 
“What about you, James, anything new in your life?” 
James looked over at you before shaking his head. 
“No, still working at the same place still…” 
“Trying to find the right person,” you filled in for him, placing a hand on his shoulder and handing him his drink. 
“Yeah,” he nodded with a soft smile and couldn’t help but laugh a little internally at the irony. Maybe the right person had been there all along, the person he’d never once pulled away from, the person he let take care of him, the person who he’d realized he’d most definitely fallen in love with, but risking things between you was out of the question so he would have to be content with the way things were. 
“You’re the head of your department, right?” your mom asked and James nodded. “Wow, that’s quite something, your parents must be proud of you.” 
“Yes, it never fails to come up in conversation with my mother,” he chuckled. 
Liana began to fuss a little bit in her grandmother’s arms and after a few failed attempts at calming her down James offered to take over. 
“Are you sure, honey?” she asked. “She gets a bit cranky and it’s hard to calm her down.” 
“Don’t worry mom, James is an expert,” you assured her. 
James nodded and confirmed he was sure before gently bouncing Liana until she stopped crying and wiping away whatever tears of hers were remaining. 
“She seems very attached to you,” your dad remarked and James looked down at Liana who now had her head resting against his chest. 
“The feeling’s quite mutual,” James chuckled. “Does she need to be fed?” he asked you. 
“Yeah we’re probably getting close to that time now, I’ll warm up the bottle. Maybe I can feed her and you can deal with the sauce on the stove, it’s missing something and I can’t place it.” 
“Sure,” James nodded and waited for you to heat up Liana’s bottle before passing her over and taking a turn at the stove. 
Your parents watched your interactions curiously and shared a few looks between themselves, but chose to say nothing. They’d known James since you were both nineteen and a lot of things had happened since then, but a lot of time had passed too. It was interesting how your comfort with each other in friendship had so naturally extended itself in this way that you were practically functioning as a family whether you noticed it, or maybe deliberately chose to ignore it. 
After you fed Liana and burped her, she was quick to fall asleep and you placed her in her cot in your room before joining James and your parents in the kitchen where they were bringing things to the dining room to lay them out on the table.
“This looks really delicious sweetheart, thank you for making dinner,” your dad said. “And you too James for taking over there in the home stretch.” 
“For all we know it could have tasted terrible before he came in so he can take the credit for that,” you chuckled. 
“No, I gave it a taste before adding anything. It just needed a little something sour to balance some things out, otherwise it was perfect,” he assured you. 
Dinner with your parents was mostly small talk. They shared a little about some of your relatives they had recently spoken to or visited and asked James how his family was doing and they left fairly early to start the drive back home. 
“I’ll load the dishes you put away the leftovers?” James yawned and you chuckled. 
“How about I do both since I had a day off and you go and lay down for a bit,” you suggested. 
“I don’t know what you’re talking about I’m fine,” James waved his hand but yawned again. 
“Go to sleep, James. That’s not a suggestion,” you walked up to him. “My ex left some sweatpants here you can change into those and take off this button up,” you tugged at his shirt. 
James pressed his lips together and nodded his head, before heading over to the bedroom and quietly getting changed before climbing into bed and not fighting the sleep that came. 
He initially wasn’t sure how much later it was when he woke up, but by the looks of it much too late to go come considering you were next to him, despite being groggy, he had a million and one things crossing his mind, but all of those were thrown out when he heard Liana begin to cry. 
You shifted next to him, waking up to go and take care of it, but James put an arm on your shoulder. 
“I’ve got it, go back to sleep,” he assured you. 
You were too tired to argue with him and let your head hit the pillow again while he stood up and picked Liana up from her crib, heading out to the kitchen so he could heat up a bottle for her before coming back and sitting in the chair to feed her. 
You watched the scene in front of you and you felt yourself wanting to memorize every detail. How he held her, the quiet things he whispered, the way she curled into his arms while he stood up and rocked her back to sleep. 
When he came back to the bed he noticed you were awake and he let out a soft chuckle and you smiled looking up at him with his messy hair. Suddenly you were nineteen again and banging on the door of cabin 3 trying to wake your fellow counsellor to come and deal with an emergency. To you he looked the same as he did all those years ago. 
“I told you to go back to sleep.” 
“Not everyone can fall asleep instantly,” you yawned with a chuckle. 
“You didn’t wake me up to leave,” he said quietly, his head resting on his hand that propped him up. 
“You always look so peaceful when you sleep, I feel evil whenever I have to wake you up,” you remarked, but behind your eyes if he could see through the darkness of the room, he would have seen them saying something else. That you wanted him to stay, you didn’t want to wake him up because you wanted to wake up next to him. “You don’t mind do you?” 
“That you’re making me do the walk of shame in the morning?” James teased and shook his head. 
“Just shut up and go back to sleep, Jamie,” you yawned with a chuckle. 
He moved so he was laying down on his back with an arm behind his head and you couldn’t tear your eyes away from him. Maybe he could feel you staring because he reached his other arm out and pulled you closer and you moved with him until your head rested against his chest, your arm draped over top of him. 
He gave you a gentle squeeze with the arm that was wrapped around you and pressed a kiss to the top of your head. 
“Goodnight, Jamie,” you mumbled into his shirt. 
You couldn’t see how he looked down and smiled at you after you said that, all that filled your ears was a quiet, “Goodnight.”
“I haven’t seen you in a few days, how have you been?” 
James sat on the carpet of the living room, playing with Liana who was crawling around him while you brought over two mugs of tea so you could chat while you entertained the growing baby. 
“Good for the most part, just had a patient who wasn’t doing so great so I spent some extra time at the hospital to keep an eye on things. Not to mention House has been bugging me to go out and it’s been a while so I figured what’s the harm.”
“He got you plastered and you made a fool of yourself, didn’t he?” you asked and James nodded while you laughed. “Liana, did James go out with House and act like an idiot?” you tickled the ten month old and she giggled before coming closer to you, tapping on your legs with her hands. 
“Don’t listen to your mama, Li, she’s trying to-,”
“Mama,” Liana repeated after James had spoken and you both stopped dead in your tracks. 
You looked over at James and his smile was just as wide as yours before you picked Liana up and smothered her with kisses. 
“Liana, look at you! You said your first word!”
“Good job, Liana banana,” James grinned and gave her cheek a little pinch which made her reach out to him and say, 
“Dada.”
You both had a similar reaction to what happened moments ago, only this time it was pure shock. Maybe you had misheard her, but when she repeated herself, James could feel his heart drop to the pit of his stomach. 
“I-I don’t know where she learnt that from,” he told you. “I swear I didn’t teach her that.”
It took a minute for the shock to fade away for you, but once it did you tried to assure James that it was okay. 
“I believe you,” you said. “I-I don’t know where she picked it up from, but it’s okay.”
James chewed on his lip, it wasn’t okay though because he wanted nothing more than to hear Liana say that again. 
“It’s not though,” James said softly. “I love her, but I’m not her dad. That’s not fair to her or to you.”
“Jamie,” you pleaded with him, but he still seemed stuck on something. 
“I’m really sorry,” he apologized again. “I feel like I ruined a special moment.”
“I’m trying to tell you it really doesn’t matter,” you assured him, you could see it in his eyes, he wanted to leave, to let you have time alone, but you didn’t want to be alone, you wanted him to stay with you. “Please…please stay.”
James reached out his hand to hold yours and was about to give you his answer when his pager went off. 
Your heart clenched and you watched as he read the message and sighed, standing up because he was needed again at the hospital. 
“Your patient?” you asked, picking Liana up and standing next to him. 
He nodded his head, “They were scheduled for an unrelated surgery and there were some complications, I have to go.”
You understood and James wrapped you in a tight hug and you kissed his cheek. 
“I love you, Jamie.”
“I love you too,” he whispered, wishing he could hold onto you and never let you go, but instead he was pulled away from your warm embrace wondering how on earth Liana had learnt to call him dad. 
“You look like you haven’t slept in days, spending time with the baby again?” House asked, waltzing into James’ office. 
“No, I haven't been over in a few days,” James shook his head. 
“You haven’t been over in a few days…Something happened,” House deduced and James gave him a look. 
“Nothing happened. I’m just taking a break,” he lied. 
“You’ve been going non-stop to spend time with them since the baby was born ten months ago, why do you need a break now?” 
“Because I have a lot on my mind and there’s a few new patients I need to focus on-,” 
“You’re lying.” 
“Yes I am,” James admitted and House grinned. 
“Really?” 
“No, I’m not,” he shook his head and continued to look down and do his work. 
“We do this every single time and every single time I’m right,” House said. “Why don’t we save the back and forth for another time and just skip to the part where you tell me what’s going on.” 
“Oh really and you were right that time you thought I was cheating on my wife and she was the one cheating on me?” he asked. 
“Okay, so I’m not perfect,” House shrugged. “What happened, Wilson? I could just as easily get your friend’s number and ask directly if that’s what you’d prefer.” 
“God no,” James shook his head. “Leave her alone, she doesn’t need to deal with you on top of working and raising a child.” 
“Alright then, what happened?” 
James took a deep breath and sighed, “Liana called me dad the other day. I have no idea where she learnt it from.” 
“She started speaking,” House nodded, pressing his lips together. “Was it her first word or-,” 
“Second. She said mom first,” James said, but caught a glimpse of his friend trying to fight back a smile and suddenly all the offers to take care of Liana paired with the photographs made sense. “You taught her!” he exclaimed. “House I can’t believe you’d pull a prank on me by manipulating my friend’s baby!” 
“Oh come on, it’s not that big of a deal,” House rolled his eyes. 
“House, I cannot believe you!” 
“You’re not mad at me,” House shook his head. “You’re just mad you liked it.” 
“No I’m-,” 
“Yes, you are,” the diagnostician emphasized. “You’ve been sitting here tearing yourself apart for the past four days because she called you dad and you liked it. You’re mad at yourself for liking it because she’s not your kid.” 
“No,” James quieted down. “She’s not.” 
“You haven’t gone back because you’re afraid to hear her say it again, aren’t you?” 
“Since when did you become an expert on my personal problems, House? You caused this, why should I listen to anything you have to say?” 
“Because you’re being an idiot. You’re punishing yourself for liking something. Do you realize how insane that sounds?” 
“It’s not insane, House, she’s not my baby-,” 
“Sure, she’s not your baby and you have her feeding and nap routine memorized. You’ve been to her doctor's appointments, she’s calmer in your arms than she is in the arms of her grandparents. Yeah, go and tell that to any moron sitting out there and they’ll tell you for me, you’re being an idiot.” 
James sighed again, “And why do you care?” 
“Because once you’re done with this spiral we can go back to the way things were when you weren’t a boring depressed lump.” 
“How kind of you,” James faked a smile. 
House’s pager went off, leaving James alone again in his office, thinking about what his friend had said. 
You’d told him so many times that things were okay, but maybe a part of him didn’t want to let him believe that you didn’t mind because that was a slippery slope to him facing himself and his feelings and he didn’t care what his heart was telling him, he wouldn’t put himself through that. He wouldn’t put you and Liana through that. But at the same time, he couldn’t keep himself away forever. He didn’t want that either.
So with a deep breath he picked up his office phone and dialled your number, putting it up to his ear and waiting for the line to connect on the other end. 
“Hello?” 
“Hey, it’s me.” 
“James,” your voice sounded almost relieved. “H-Hey, how are you?” 
He pressed his lips together, “Miserable, actually. I miss you guys.” 
“We miss you too,” you chuckled with a small sniffle. 
“C-Can I come over for dinner tonight?” he asked. 
“You still have a key, what do you think?” you asked with a bit of a laugh. “I’ll see you tonight.” 
“Yeah, see you then,” James smiled and after he hung up the phone he took a deep breath, his fast heartbeat slowing down by the second. 
Maybe this time House was right.
The next few weeks passed by and things resumed to their normal state, much to House’s delight. James’ role as department head always meant at least one day a week where he would stay late and do some extra paperwork, dealing with anything that may have slipped through the cracks before. 
This time, that had fallen on a Sunday and it was just past dinner when he heard a knock on his door and wondering who was on the other end he called for them to come in. 
You opened the door a crack and again asked permission to come in and James smiled at you, looking up from his paperwork, not expecting to see you in the hospital. 
“Hey, I wasn’t expecting to see you here, what’s going on?” 
“I just wanted to drop by and bring you something for dinner, I know it’s your paperwork day.” 
“Thanks, that’s really sweet of you,” he stood up from his chair and came to stand in front of his desk, leaning back on it while you placed the take out bag on the table. “Where’s Liana?” 
“Oh Helen’s looking after her tonight,” you said. “I had a few things I needed to do and um just wanted the evening off,” you admitted. 
“Fair enough,” James nodded. 
“I actually brought you something else,” you rolled back and forth on the balls of your feet and James noticed the tension in your stature. “H-Here,” you handed him a gift bag which he eyed curiously. 
Today wasn’t his birthday or some memorable event you celebrated together. There wasn’t much of a reason to get him a present which made it all the more intriguing. 
He pulled out a wrapped rectangular box from the bag, and putting the bag aside he began to carefully tear away the wrapping paper to reveal what looked like a picture frame. Overlaid on the frame, on top of the photo, James noticed a card which he unfolded to read its contents. 
Happy Father’s Day. We love you loads. - Liana and Mom
James moved the card to see the picture and put his hand over his mouth, feeling tears involuntarily form in his eyes as he saw the familiar scene of your room, lit by the light of your lamp as Liana was fast asleep against his chest while he napped on the armchair. 
James quickly wiped away the few tears that were in his eyes and looked up at you with a grateful smile, looking back down at the image before placing it neatly on his desk along with the card. 
“I hope you like it,” you said quietly, biting your lip. “I thought you might want to have a copy of that picture and…you know just a thank you for everything you’ve done for me and Liana this past year.” 
“I love it,” he assured you. “I-I love it and I love you.” 
“I love you too,” you smiled.
“N-No,” James came closer and reached out, taking your hands in his. “I…I love you. I’m in love with you.” 
“Jamie,” you spoke in a breathy whisper, unsure of how you lost your voice. “I-,” you opened your mouth to speak again, but paused when James raised a hand to your face, wiping away the tears you didn’t even notice had begun to stream down. 
“I just don’t want to be away from you, ever,” he said softly. “I never did. And now with Liana, I want to be there, for all of it.” 
You held the wrist of his hand that held your face, pulling him in closer so your foreheads rested against each other. 
You took in a shaky breath, thinking back on those words. Something you’d been saying to each other for longer than you could remember. The first time was so clear in your mind, you were on the phone racking up long distance charges while James was in Montreal. It had slipped out by accident, a reflex, and you had convinced yourself when the phone had hung up you’d never call him back, unable to face what you’d just said, but before you could spiral any further, he said it back and you never stopped saying it.
For the longest time that was the only occurrence that was memorable, everything else was a blur, that was until a few months ago. It was so simple, you had fallen asleep on the couch and James had made sure Liana was fed and bathed and even cleared up some things in the kitchen before sitting on the couch with some tea and a book. You had talked and said I love you as a thank you, but when the words left your mouth they also left a lingering airiness in your heart, a feather light feeling that came crashing down like an anvil when he left to go home because you realized you never wanted to be apart from him.
It took you a few moments to realize you hadn’t said anything and James was anxiously waiting for some sort of communication, anything, but since the meaning of your words had changed, for both of you, you thought it might be more conducive to work in actions.
You closed in the space between you, at first gently resting your lips on his and letting him lead you in a soft and slow kiss, putting aside all the restraint you both had been using these past months in an effort to protect your friendship.
One of James’ hands held onto your waist, pulling you in so that there was no space left between you. He kissed you again and again, remembering each one as a core memory, engraved in his mind, paired with the feeling of your arms wrapped around his neck, the feeling of your body pressed so closely against his, his heart beating outside of his chest. 
It was easy for his lips to trail away from yours, moving along your jaw, to your temple before you had pulled each other into a warm embrace, simply existing in each other’s arms. James thought to himself what a nice life it would be, not ever having to pull away. 
“I don’t have much to say,” James smiled. “Everything is looking good, you still seem 100% healthy to me.” 
“That’s great news.” 
“It definitely is. Standard procedure, but we’ll have one more of these remission follow ups to make sure everything is still in order then you hopefully won’t have to see me again.” 
“Thank you Dr. Wilson, I really appreciate all you’ve-.” 
“Dad!” 
“Sweetheart, wait he’s with a patient!” 
James turned his head and saw Liana running over to him, you valiantly trying to chase after her without much success. 
He quickly scooped her up in his arms before she crashed into him, pressing a big kiss to her cheek. 
“Sorry about that,” James apologized. “It’s Saturday, we normally have lunch together.” 
“No worries,” he chuckled. 
“Liana, this is my patient Mr. Kimbilio, can you say hi?” 
Liana waved and said hi, very exuberantly. 
“This is my daughter,” James introduced. “And that’s my wife,” he pointed over to you. 
“Daughter,” Mr. Kimbilio smiled. “I think I met you Liana, when you were very small. Your father was looking after you at work and so some of his patients got to meet you.” 
“Really?” she looked up at her dad and he nodded. 
“He’s right, I remember that,” James smiled. “You’ve grown a lot since then, haven’t you Li,” he kissed her cheek again and she giggled.
You finally caught up to the group and James greeted you with a quick kiss, passing Liana off to you so he could wrap things up and you could all go down to the cafeteria for lunch together. 
“If I remember correctly,” Mr. Kimbilio started. “You didn’t introduce her as your daughter the first time we met. I’m glad something changed.” 
“Me too,” James smiled, looking over at his wife and daughter fondly who were now in the midst of making him very proud by pulling off a small prank on House as he came out of his office. 
It didn’t take much longer for them to wrap things up and you and Liana made a quick pit stop inside James’ office before heading downstairs.
Liana went to go sit in James’ seat while he put away his files and organized them. 
It had been a while since you’d been in his office, but it felt like ever since the night you first kissed things had begun to change in the room. 
His desk was now more littered with photos than knickknacks and Liana’s artwork was posted wherever there was room. 
You came around to the other side, looking a little more closely at the pictures. 
There was one of you, James, and Liana on your wedding day, another of just the two of you during an anniversary celebration, Liana’s kindergarten photo from school and another one of you as a family on your last vacation. And still as prominent as ever, the framed photo you had gifted James on his first father’s day. 
“You ready to go?” he asked you, looking up and noticing your eyes gazing at the pictures on his desk. 
When you didn’t initially respond, too focused on what you were looking at, James wrapped an arm around you and tilted your chin towards him so he could press a kiss to your lips.
“I love you,” you smiled and James kissed you again, saying.
“And I love you,” before moving over to pick up Liana and kiss her cheek. “And you.”
Liana giggled, feeling tickled by the kisses and moving to give both of you a kiss on the cheek before saying. 
“Mom, Dad, I’m starving. Can we go eat now?”
“Sure, Liana banana,” James chuckled and you wrapped an arm around him, walking side by side out of the office and in the direction of the elevator to get to the cafeteria, thinking you were pretty lucky that in the end, your best friend listened to his heart and went after what he wanted.
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TAGLIST —
@cuntyvicodin @paola-carter @kiddbegins @il0vebeingdelulu @illicit4ff4irs @lynnsthoughts @miarabanana @iwmflbb @shots-of-wilson-and-whiskey @sarcasm-and-stiles @sun-flower-mad @x-uno @han11dh @qardasngan @alexxavicry
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frownyalfred · 9 days ago
Note
I feel like a fantastic outside POV fic would be someone sitting down to eat with Bruce for the first time, maybe the league having a lunch/dinner meeting and sure, they expected to see Flash inhaling a mountain of food, but then Bruce eats his insane bulking meal, and by the end everyone is stunned, and a little depressed by Bruce's meal. Cue everyone learning that Bruce does, in fact, eat like that for most meals. Maybe Ollie extoles the wonders of whatever new diet he's on, and Clark's inner southern "we put a stick of butter in everything we cook" home cook is just silently planning to introduce Bruce to good food.
Agreed! I think the horrifying thing is that Bruce can’t afford to dirty bulk. He has to lean bulk, which is torture if you’ve ever done it. Every single mouthful counts. You think bulking is just eating as much food as possible but it’s not.
There’s a reason we see Bruce drinking those fuck-ass smoothies all the time. They’re quick, they’re concentrated lean protein, and he can choke them down easier than an entire plate of chicken breasts, ten eggs, and a bowl of rice (I exaggerate a little, but not that much).
Like I said before, I understand why he wouldn’t enjoy food. I stopped liking food during my last bulk. I would 100% rather cut at that point. You start viewing food merely as fuel for your muscles and stop thinking about sharing meals with family, enjoying new flavors, etc.
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gothlcsan · 11 months ago
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ESEX ; JEONG YUNHO
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PAIRING non!idol yunho + afab!reader
GENRE 18+ SMUT
SYNOPSIS when you convince your boyfriend, yunho to take time away from his game to please you, both of you forgetting to turn off his headset..
WORD COUNT 2790
WARNINGS implied shower sex, dubcon (reader crawls under yunho’s desk without him knowing), chokehold (reader receiving), biting, kissing, mentions of breeding, non detailed aftercare, no protection (use protection yall), let me know if there’s more to tag!
a/n my first fic of the new year! thank you to everyone who has stuck with me throughout the year and engaged with my writing and this account overall. 🥺 id love to start 2024 with the goal of making friendships on here and writing for others so if you could share this and send any requests my way, id absolutely love it so much. happy new year everyone! much love. 🩶
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Ever since you had gotten your boyfriend, Yunho, the new Spider-man two game for his playstation, he’s been a bit too occupied. You never minded when Yunho would set away time to play his games, always having an unofficial schedule of doing your own work or hobbies while he games. However, it’s been two days and the game was slowly (but quickly) getting in the way of both your relationship and life itself. He’s barely eaten, slept, and you were more than positive that the only thing he did in the bathroom was to use the toilet meaning; he was in desperate need of a shower.
Knocking on his door, you popped just your head in, having to step inside fully with a sigh seeing his gaming headset on. He was most likely playing with his friends (mentally apologizing to their partners knowing exactly what they’re going through) tapping onto his shoulder to grab his attention. Yunho blatantly ignores you, rolling your eyes as you shook his shoulder saying his name again to rob his attention from the game. This ends up with him pausing the game finally, muttering to his friends that he had to deal with something, the group groaning saying to make it quick. Turning his head he gives an annoyed, “yes?”
“Don’t be mean, Yunho. I was trying to not interrupt and ask if you wanted anything to eat but you couldn’t hear me.”
“I’m not hungry.” He goes to put the headset back on, stopping him by placing it back down onto the desk.
“Yeah see I don’t believe that because you haven’t eaten in a few days and I’m starting to get annoyed.”
Lifting up a handful of empty candy wrappers, you glare at Yunho stating candy wasn’t a nutritional meal, a pout forming on his face as he turns his hand to let the wrappers fall back onto his desk. Luckily, he was smart enough not to argue with logic.
“I’m just asking, come eat, shower, and then if you’d like to go back to gaming, cool. I hate sounding like your mum.”
Yunho blushes, apologizing as he tells everyone he’ll be back later on, saving the game before closing out of it. Standing up he feels the ache of sitting for too long, his empty stomach growling loudly as he sheepishly grabs for your hand to walk to the kitchen with you.
“You smell,” you said with a laugh, all but being dragged into the kitchen where Yunho finished multiple bowls of rice and plates of meat. You were happy to see him finally eat properly, enjoying your warm stew as he grilled more meat for the two of you to share on the portable grill.
Finishing your meal, the two of you slouch into your seats, Yunho thanking you for the meal. You laugh at him, telling him it wasn’t a problem and you were happy that he ate. Yunho excuses himself to go shower, giving you a kiss against your forehead before lightly jogging towards the direction of the bathroom. Usually you’d be bothered by having to make dinner and then clean up solo but hearing the shower finally running after a few days, you’ll happily do the majority of the work.
Placing the last of the dried dishes into the cupboards, you turn around hearing the bathroom door opening, anticipating for Yunho to come back into the kitchen (most likely to show you he showered like a puppy.) As if on cue, Yunho comes out of the bathroom and back into the kitchen in a pair of black shorts and a lavender gray sweater, towel wrapped around his neck to protect his hair from dripping onto it. Giving him a tight hug around his waist, you bury your face into his chest, inhaling his clean scent before looking up at him with a huge grin.
“You smell so good. Thank you.”
“Thank you for taking care of me.” Yunho says as he leans down and plants a kiss against your lips, walking back towards his gaming room.
“I love you!”
“I love you too, dork.” You yell back, going to your shared room to grab clothes to take your own shower.
Several hours later, you hit the realization that Yunho was still gaming.
Swiping your phone screen down, you purse your lips, seeing it was already one in the morning and Yunho was yet in bed with you. Placing your phone down next to you, you grab the collar of the baggy shirt you stole from Yunho, taking an annoyed look down at your lingerie hiding underneath the baggy fabric. It felt like a bit of a waste, becoming slightly upset by it. Deciding you weren’t going to get upset or put beneath a game, you climb out of bed making your way down the small hallway into his gaming room. Of course when you twist the doorknob and push the door open, he was sitting at his desk, headset on as he yelled at his friends who were surely doing the same to him. Letting yourself in, you stand behind him for a while knowing that he was engrossed into the game, oblivious of the fact you were positioned right behind him.
“Yunho.”
Nothing.
You nudge him a bit, “Yunho?”
Nothing. If you were a snake, he’d be bitten eons ago.
Huffing you roll your eyes, gently bending onto the floor until your hands and knees touch the carpet. Quietly, you slowly and carefully crawl against the soft carpet to make your way under the desk from the side, thanking Yunho in your head for having pristine cable management. Not wanting to ponder on the level of embarrassment you would’ve had to face if you got stuck or unplugged a cord. He still hadn’t acknowledged your existence, shrugging as you situated yourself to be directly in front of his lap, taking a deep breath before reaching for his shorts. His knee jerks, knocking his knee against the underside of the desk as he feels a tug on the band of the shorts, surprised. Yunho leans back and looks down, flinching clearly spooked when he sees you tucked under him.
“When did you get there?” He asked, confused.
“No, not you, my girlfriend. Shut up.” Yunho hollers into the headset, covering his microphone with his hand.
“You once again didn’t answer me and haven’t even got to see me in my pretty new lingerie.” You feigned a pout, yanking his shorts down.
“Babe-,” He’s cut off by you wrapping your hand around the base of his cock, glaring at him.
“It’s the least you can do, Yunho. If you want to play your game so badly, do so, but I'm using you.” You spat, watching his eyes widen and roll back as you moved your fingers up the shaft, to compare size, the tips of your fingers nowhere near close to passing the tip. He lets out a breathy sigh flinching as he mumbles a suspiciously quick “nothing” into his headset, his head falling back as you leave multiple wet opened mouth kisses up the shaft stopping around the tip.
“Is that my shirt?”
You grin widely giggling as you give him a nod.
“Mhm, I know how hard you get from seeing me in your clothes.”
Yunho must’ve forgotten his headset audio was on, groaning out a low, “fuck,” as he moved to kick off his shorts. His dick laid heavy against his abdomen and stomach, smirking pleased at his expression. Someone was desperate. Placing your hand back around him, you shift your weight so you can easily lean forward, wrapping your lips around one of his balls. Taking it into your mouth and giving it a few suctions at different pressures, Yunho groans loudly, this time a hand reaching down to lock your head into place. The twinge of pain on your scalp makes you wet in between your legs, clenching around nothing as you hum contentedly. Dropping him from your mouth with a wet pop, you fight his grip on you long enough to look at him and smile, hoping to get exactly what you want.
“Take it off.”
Removing his grip from you, he pushes back just far enough from the desk to give you space to maneuver the shirt off yourself, exposing the revealing lingerie hidden underneath. Yunho breathes deeply through his nose, feeling suddenly embarrassed by his deep fixation on you, Yunho clearly content with your choice. The black sheer lace complimented your skin, his long slender fingers reaching down to hook underneath the shoulder strap, moving alongside it until he reached the back of it - - unhooking the bra to fall onto your lap in one smooth movement. Your boobs fall from the bra, blushing as he helps you to move onto his lap, not allowing you a second to process before his large mouth is wrapped around one of your nipples.
“Yunho.” You enthusiastically moan into his ear, wrapping your arms around the back of his neck allowing your fingers to intertwine with his hair. His tongue swipes across the erected bud as he uses his hand to squeeze your boob, pushing more than just the nipple into his ravenous mouth. Your mind becomes clouded as the hand around your boob slips down your stomach until it passes the band of your thong. Long, slender fingers moving suggestively up and then back down your slit before suddenly delving two into your pussy. Clenching around the digits, you whine into Yunho’s neck who hushes you down by praising you, moving just the tips of his fingers not yet thrusting.
“Want, more,” You slur looking down at his hand, giving him an inviting kiss against his jaw that immediately turned into a soft gasp from the sudden thrust of his fingers. They felt incredibly deep already, your head leaning back to rest on his armchair, moans flooding the room. Erotically wet squelching from his fingers pushing into you makes you blush profusely, begging him to quench the fiery desire for him. Fortunately due to the fact you two haven’t had sex in the days he’s spent gaming, Yunho was more than eager to do as you wished.
“Let’s take these off, ok?”
Yanking the thong off your body and throwing thoughtlessly somewhere on to the floor, Yunho helps you up so you're comfortably positioned bent over his desk. He fixes your legs open for easier access, kissing up from the shoulder blades to the crook of your neck, giving a playful bite before refocusing his attention. Wrapping a hand around the backside of your knee, Yunho lifts your leg up, his dick sinking into you with little to no resistance. Your eyes roll up in satisfaction, wrapping your fingers around the edge of his desk to hold yourself somewhat into place, sweet moans already starting to flow past your lips. With each thrust another round of erotic noises are ripped out of you, your thoughts cloudy as you begged Yunho to never stop. He wraps his free arm around your throat, bringing you up to his chest in a chokehold. The grip was tight but gentle enough not to bring you any harm, the additional pain making you clench around him hard.
“Please, please, please,” you begged.
“Please what, hm?”
Your face burns up suddenly embarrassed giving him nothing but breathy whines that held no context.
“I asked you a question, please what?” Yunho reiterated, his grip tightening around both the backside of your knee and around your throat.
“Please breed me, I miss you.”
The entirety of your body inflamed in an instant blush, Yunho smirking as he drops his chokehold on you. You gasped for air, groaning between pursed lips as you felt Yunho’s large hands wrapped around your hips. His thrusts became sloppy but enough to hit all the right places, picking up in pace making the skin around your ass and thighs brighten to a pink. Feeling him twitched whilst inside you made your head spin in circles, it was more than evident both of you were close to your orgasms, taking in large breaths continuously begging Yunho to cum in you. Yunho’s breath warmly fanning your ear as he spoke and the weight of him being pressed against you to do so as he didn’t once slow down his thrusts into you, he bites and tugs at your earlobe before letting go.
“Should I fill you up?”
“Please, Yunho, please-“
“You’d look so cute filled by me.” Yunho cut you off, not having to see him to hear the smirk in his voice.
“Want you, please, please?”
Your eyes hooded over as he laughed over your desperation, fucking into you at a vigorous pace until his legs began to convulse and tremble.
“Fuck,” is the last word you pick up before your head fuzzes completely over, spilling around Yunho’s dick. Quiet moans are pushed out of you as Yunho reaches his climax, warmth filling you up. He slowly begins to lessen his pace, pulling back until he is almost completely out of you before pushing himself back into you balls deep. He mumbles about feeling warm but you’re unable to coherently grasp what he was saying, whining as he pulls out, clenching around nothing already missing him. You can feel your shared arousal drip down your thighs, whining for a kiss, smiling as Yunho felt your head into place to give you a loving kiss. Not caring about the sweat or anything else for that matter, you climb on top of his desk, wrapping your arms around the back of his neck.
The two of you spend a few minutes kissing as a way to “catch your breath,” giggling as Yunho pulls away asking how you felt. Pondering on the question with a hum, you watch his face slowly begin to switch to worry.
“I’m teasing! It felt so good, I missed you badly.” You reassured him, giving him another reassuring kiss on the lips.
Yunho begins to say something but freezes, his eyes wide in panic as he rips off his headset, leaning over you as he exited out of his game and clicked on something else you didn’t recognize. Asking him what was wrong his body simoustanly flushes a deep red, his gaze bouncing between you and the monitor.
“The game wasn’t off,” he pauses, “or the chat.”
You raise an eyebrow. “The chat?”
Yunho groans, begging you to not get mad at him, so red you were scared he’d combust into flames. Asking him again what he was talking about, his sudden concern starting to freak you out.
“The chat, as in my friends in discord, who was on call with me when you came in, heard us.. you know.”
It was your turn to turn red. You hadn’t thought about checking on that before continuing on since the two of you both were equally in the moment, hiding behind your hands in embarrassment.
“Oh my god, Yu, hopefully they didn’t listen.”
“What if they did?”
You weren’t sure why that question made your cheeks flare up the way it had, in between your legs warming and growing wet with curiosity. What if they had? Would they have stayed on and listened? Did they take their headphones off and acted as if they heard nothing? Lastly, why did the idea of someone catching you two suddenly turning you on?
Those “what ifs” ran through your mind at such a speed that made you nauseous, Yunho reassuring you it was nothing, pressing gentle kisses across your jaw and up to your lips. You decided to let it fade from your mind not wanting to overthink something so silly, allowing Yunho to pick you up off his desk bridal style heading out of the bedroom and making his way down the hallway towards the bathroom to shower together.
Now, you and Yunho had forgotten all about the mishap by the time the two of you had round two and cleaned up in the shower. However, for poor Mingi who was slumped back in his gaming chair with his arm covering his face, he was living through the shame of listening to his best friend and his girlfriend have sex. Which isn’t even the worst part of the entire situation, the brute of his embarrassment lied in the fact he had shamelessly masturbated to them. This quickly became a secret he’d have to carry to his grave with him. Groaning as he cleaned himself up, turning off his pc, and never bringing the situation up to anyone, thankful as you two never brought it up either, deciding it was best for everyone if no one acted like it happened.
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aklaustaleteller · 4 months ago
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Not For A Long Time
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Klaus returns back to his lover omega's cottage after a long time, and he wants nothing more than to just mark her as his, all over again. But all Y/n seems to want, is to eat her dinner and get on his nerves, ...and to absentmindedly rub herself all over him.
Warnings - allusions of smut, and Alpha/Omega dynamic.
Word Count - 1.3k
Masterlist | Please reblog if you like the fic!
This is something I found in my drafts and well, let's just say I wanted to get it out of there. It's quite aimless and silly, and doesn't have my best writing skills used, but I still hope you enjoy reading hahah <3 (I lowkey enjoyed writing this type of fic though, so do let me know if I should write more stuff like this!!)
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A candle flickered in the middle of the kitchen island, its crackling being the only sound other than one of the running water in the sink.
The fridge was, quite carelessly, left open ajar as Y/n kept herself busy on the other end, washing the rice before she could cook it. She hummed a very gentle tune, or it could be a rock song that her soft voice just happened to make sound similar to a lullaby.
It was as she was taking out a casserole from the fridge that she felt the night wind come in with a rather strong force, freeing some of her loose hair strands from where they were tucked behind her ear.
"Klaus, how lovely it is to see you," she smiled, closing the fridge and lifting her gaze from the stove to settle it onto the charming intruder.
"Hello, love," he pursed his lips before a smirk dug out one of his dimples. "It's been quite a long time," he continued, strolling closer to her.
Shaking her head, she turned away from him to focus on the task at hand. "A week is not a long time, Klaus," she said with a chuckle.
"Not even when it's your lover Alpha that's been gone?" He asked as a whisper in her ear, resting his chin on her shoulder while snaking his arms around his waist from behind.
"I'm afraid I cannot give you the answer to that in just words," she answered, her voice having gone quieter along with his, and turned her face to press a peck on the corner of his mouth, doing it again when a smile stretched out on his lips.
He sighed then, letting his eyes fall shut as he breathed in her scent. The smell of old books, soil after it's just rained along with some hint of a rose and finally, her blood, knocked his senses out for a couple seconds.
It reminded him of the first time he had caught the whiff of her scent from a couple miles away, the full moon shining down on him and making his night-sky fur look silkier than it was. Taking advantage of being in his wolf form, he’d chased down the scent and ended up coming to a halt in front of a front garden lit up with warm lights coming from inside the cottage.
He'd seen a couple fireflies near the ivy that crept all over the walls from outside, making the building look rather earthly and older than the time itself. The noise of plates and bowls clattering didn't go amiss by Klaus, making him near the noise with deliberate steps.
Saliva coated his tongue as he finally stood just below the window, keeping himself hidden as his eyes peered inside to see a woman stirring something in a pot, sputters of laughter falling from her soft mouth as an energized dog skittered around her feet, clawing at her skirt to reach the treat she held up high in her free hand.
His lips had pulled back in a smile then, eyes unable to move on from her.
He'd returned every night since then, catching her attention on a particular one when she'd been out by the lake, crying in her knees and that was when Klaus had realised that the woman, he'd secretly been going mad after, was an Omega, left all alone when she should've been in an Alpha's arms, being taken care of in all shape and form.
And so, very calmly he'd approached her and when she'd realised that he was an Alpha wolf, she lost even that slight control over her emotions and clutched his fur as she cried into his neck, stutters and hiccups escaping her mouth until she'd calmed down and passed out, tired, in his presence.
That was the day he'd swore to himself that he wasn't going to let her end up hurt ever again. And as he took her home in his arms, silently hoping that she wouldn't wake up to catch him naked, he'd laid her in her bed when she allowed him to enter his home in a sleepy haze.
"Stay, Alpha?" she'd asked, her eyes moistening all over again and Klaus had not the heart to leave her be, causing him to lie down beside her and hold her in his arms as she purred and slept the night away, his body merely covered by her sheets.
Since that night, he'd learned that she'd been crying that day because her puppy-dog had been adopted by someone in the town who had also adopted his siblings. He would be happier with them, she'd sobbed into his arms while telling him, trying to reassure herself over Klaus.
And also, the fact that she was, indeed, an Omega yet to be claimed by an Alpha. She'd yet to give herself to him completely, to surrender herself to be his to love and care for. But Klaus understood that, accepted her past traumas and allowed her time to open up to him day by day.
"I was just preparing dinner. Care to join this lonely Omega, Alpha?" She asked, giving him her full attention after finally placing the food on the stove.
Looking at him doe eyed as he cupped her cheeks and pressed a kiss on her mouth, she whimpered when a growl rumbled deep in his chest, meant to be heard just by her.
"Of course," he accepted gently, backing her up until she was sat on the kitchen island.
She motioned for him to wait, and Klaus looked at her confusedly before he saw her blow out the candle behind her. A chuckle came from him, finding the action cute.
Y/n faced him again with a sloppy smile on her face, letting him press kisses on her mouth over and over again until he had her laughing and pulling away from him. He chased after her nonetheless -- pressing his mouth to her forehead, cheeks, nose, chin and continued to pepper kisses down her jaw.
And it was when he reached her collarbone that he truly began marking her. He left a trail of love bites behind as he scattered his kisses all over the exposed skin. Her little whimpers and moans only made him hungrier for her, making him pull her hair back, giving him more skin to mark up.
"Klaus --" she began but he cut her off with a hiss.
"Now, darling," he breathed warningly against her skin. "It’s Alpha," he corrected her.
"Pl-please, Alpha," Y/n purred, beginning to feel sensitive. "Need to turn off the stove, please," she begged him to let her get away, and Klaus did.
Lifting her off the counter, he let her wrap her legs around his waist as he walked over and turned off the stove and moved on to speed up the stairs.
He laid her on the fluffy bed that reeked of her scent but before he could lie down over her and rid her of the clothes that got in the way of his mouth and her skin, she was out of the bed and running away from him, spurts of laughter falling from her lips.
His eyes flashed golden just for a second before he was chasing after her, finding the situation rather amusing.
"I'm hungry, Alpha. Won't you eat with me?" She said out of breath when he caught up to her, snatching her from behind and into his chest.
And her giggles stopped altogether when she heard him growl, this time louder to warn her against disobeying him as she realised that she’d begun getting on his nerves now.
"Please Alpha?" She mewled for him, getting him with those eyes all over again as he accepted her pleas and took her over to the dining table, bringing her the dinner and feeding it to her whilst she sat in his lap, talking about all the happenings that she came across while he was gone, not for a long time, clearly, as she couldn’t stop absentmindedly rubbing herself all over him.
276 notes · View notes
reallyromealone · 4 months ago
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Title: healer
Fandom: naruto
Characters: akatsuki
Fic type: omegaverse
Pairings:
Warnings: male reader, reader insert, omegaverse, readers smart
Notes:
🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸
(Name) Hummed quietly to themselves while carefully wrapping gauze around the alphas midsection that they had just stitched up. Handing was a cleaned akatsuki uniform, stitched and sewn back up like new, (name) didn't really know what the uniform symbolised but it was clearly important and they wouldn't want the unconscious man to worry about it.
(Name) Lived alone in these woods, the ability to heal the worst of wounds and this one was no different.
"No clue what fight you got yourself into but you sure made it out barely...." (Name) Joked to the unconscious person while finishing up 'no clue when they will wake up.... Should probably make dinner...' (name) thought while going to their small kitchen to make a meal, enough for two people... Just in case.
Itachi woke to the smell of an Omega and stew, sitting up with a groan and looking to see he was bandaged up... Quite well actually.
"Don't sit up too fast! You could pop a stitch!" A voice called from the other room and Itachi looked for his belongings to find them neatly beside him and his coat hung and fixed. An Omega walked into the room with a tray, a bowl and a glass filled with what was assumed to be juice "you were out for a while! Didn't know when you would wake up.." (name) chuckled nervously while setting the tray on the coffee table "how do you feel? You were pretty messed up ... My healing could only do so much so I had to do the rest manually"
Itachi just stared at the other who smiled happily before a look of realization crossed them 'must realize who I am affiliated wi--' "I forgot to introduce myself! I'm (name)!" The Omega bowed slightly before looking up sheepishly, Itachi sat there stunned before getting up "thank you for your assistance" he said simply while grabbing his belongings, (name) looking concerned "do you have anyone to call? I have a telephone..." It was an old one, nothing like the the newer cell phones but it did it's job!
"That won't be needed"
"Well... Here! Take this!" (Name) Rushed out into the kitchen and returned with origini, wrapped and all cute "I keep these on hand for snacks... Please keep safe"
Why was this Omega so kind? To someone they didn't know?
Itachi didn't know what to make of it but decided to just leave, rice ball in hand.
"This is real good! Where did ya get this?" Deidara asked while finishing the rice ball, Itachi resting with a sigh "some Omega who healed me" he grumbled and hidan raised an eyebrow "an Omega did that? What some high ranking ninja?"
"No, just some Omega in the woods"
"Whoever that Omega was, they have healing abilities like nothing I ever seen..." The older man said simply while glancing at the others exposed stitches, he saw how fucked up the other alpha looked, that omega was powerful.
"Hm?" (Name) Was reading some books they got from town a a couple kilometers from the woods they resided in when a knock at the door pulled them out from their world of imagination. Walking to the door, they weren't expecting to see that alpha again or others dressed like him "oh you're back! You forget anything?" (Name) Asked curiously and glanced at their mid section "you left before I could give you cream to help... Hopefully it healed nicely!"
"This is the Omega that healed you? This is them?" Deidara laughed in disbelief while (name) looked confused, a large group of alphas coming and just laughing, then konan felt it...
The omegas Chakra.
"We require your assistance, one of our members is gravely injured" she lied, (name) looking concerned "sure! Let me get my bag!" The alphas stepped in while (name) went to their room to go grab their belongings.
But (name) knew better than to trust a large group of alphas even if they were incredibly attractive.
So they used what they were taught by their grandpa and slipped out, a secret door in their closet.
'nope, not today' (name) thought while they sneaked away.
Knowing a few Jitsu really helped in a punch....
263 notes · View notes
anemptypuddingcup · 9 months ago
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Wishes aren’t real.
Samurai Zoro x Female Maid Reader.
You were saved and swept up and out of poverty by a loyal and thoughtful samurai. Eyes filled with admiration and gratitude for him blinds the things that may need to be seen.
Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3
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Contains: This entire series contains dark themes. Reader is a lower class woman living in poverty (until Zoro finds her). Zoro is a higher class samurai or swordsman. Zoro taking in Reader and making her his maid. Sweet and harmless Zoro. (Zoro doesn’t show his true nature until the next part.) Reader noticing the odd things from Zoro but brushing it off. This beginning fic is very long and gets you into the story.
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You hadn’t done a lot in your life…
You only remember the better times you had when you were a younger child to teenager, back when you saw your mother caring for you and doing as much as she could to help bring food to the table.
You’d finally understood how hard she struggled, how terrible it was and is to still live in poverty. You didn’t even have the heart to walk around and ask for a bowl of rice or even a loaf of bread.
You were embarrassed to walk around town in your tattered kimono and scratched up geta without the feeling of eyes burning into your body.
Living in poverty was a terrible thing.
And now here you are…your back up against a brick wall in a small alley as you felt yourself dying of starvation…
You believed that there was no hope in you being saved…not from starvation and neither not from poverty.
The more your stomach growled, the weaker you grew and the more you began to close your eyes and drift off into a painful rest.
You sigh out and press your hands together, whispering a final prayer to yourself while your body slowly slide down. You lied there against the rough gravel on the ground, knowing that your time was nearly up and that your body was close to finally giving out.
You groaned out and let out another little sigh before slowly closing your eyes, accepting your fate but thanking whatever god it was for bringing you into this dark and cruel world.
He took slow and heavy steps while he clung to his three swords at his hip, his left arm within his kimono as he trailed down the path of loose gravel below himself.
He was heading home to rest up and prepare for the next day after working so hard and draining himself out for today. An irritated groan left his lips as he turned into a dark alleyway, his only eye peering around as he took slow and careful steps down the path.
As he walked, he noticed a light shadow or a figure kneeling down on the path which makes him come to a sudden halt. His eye stared down at what seemed to be a woman who was sleeping on the side of the path. He quirks a brow before crouching down beside her, inspecting her before reaching a hand out to touch her. Hearing her groan out weakily causes him to pull back and he tilts his head before pressing his hand to his chin.
He sighs out before reaching his arms out and sliding them underneath the young woman, picking her up and raising his brows at how light she was.
Judging from her torn kimono and scuffed geta, it was obvious that she was a lower class woman who hadn’t eaten in more than a few days. He sighs out and continues his walk with the young woman held tight in his arms but not too tight that she could be hurt.
Staring down at her features, she wasn’t hard on the eyes. She was beautiful. Her monotone facial expression gave off the sense that she was probably fed up with her life and was accepting her fate once she fell asleep.
He huffs out lowly but gives a little smirk as he thought about what to do.
How would she react once she woke up? How would her nature be? Is she a good person? Is she trustworthy?
So many questions ran through his mind as he went down the path to his estate.
He would just have to wait and see.
Your body was warm and cozy as you felt your eyelids slowly opening, the sight of tatami mats and shoji screens made your brows furrow in question.
Must’ve been a dream.
You rubbed your eyes and looked around once again, the scenery still the same as it was when you opened your eyes the first time .
“Mmgh…? W-What…?” You rubbed your head and slowly sat up, your body feeling the soft material of a futon beneath your body. The blankets were warm and soft against your skin, and the sweet smell of freshly washed linen filled your nose. You looked around at the scenery, seemed like you were in someone else’s home…but who’s home to be exact?
You slowly crawled up out of your futon and stood up, mewling as you stretched out your arms and torso. Taking a few steps, you slowly stumbled over to the shoji door and slid it open, peeking through the crack and gathering your surroundings. Sliding the door open fully, you slowly walk out of the room and close the door behind yourself before looking around.
The sound of bare feet hitting the tatami mats catches your attention and you look around to see…a young man with green mossy hair. His eye peers at you and he smiled before walking past you and to the room at the end of hall, your eyes following his large figure. You scratch your head in confusion before turning around and reaching a hand out to him.
“Um- E-Excuse me!” You call out to him which makes him freeze in place before turning around and looking to you with his only eye. “Hm?” He tilts his head and quirks a brow to you, standing tall above you and looking down at you and your smaller frame. Your words immediately went back into your throat as you realize how big this man was.
He was rather handsome too…
“U-Um…Where?- Where is this place? Last time I fell asleep…I was…” You words trail off as your stomach began to growl loudly, cutting your attention away from your question. Zoro smiles and grabs your hand, guiding you down the hallway and into his tea room. “You’ve woken up just in time. I was just about to eat breakfast without you if you slept longer. I’ll explain things after you eat.” He says, his footsteps careful and slow.
You nodded and followed him, standing there as you watched him slide the shoji door to his tea room open. Rice balls were arranged on a tray along with two teacups filled with hot green tea on the low table. The weather was beautiful outside, with the birds chirping and the bamboo of the shishi-odoshi (deer scarer) repeatedly falling and hitting the stone.
The man slowly walks into the room and motions you to come in, to which you do. “Have a seat.” He says, patting the pillow beside him as he sat himself down. You slowly sit yourself down and say a small prayer before grabbing a rice ball, your stomach growling and yearning for food to just enter it.
“I’ll discuss things with you in a moment after you eat. I need you to eat and drink something, alright?” He explains to you firmly, his eye looking down at you while he watches you take a bite out of your rice ball. You mewl out at the taste and nodded to him, stuffing down half of the rice ball within seconds.
“Y-Yes sir…” You say, covering your mouth and excusing yourself as you spoke with your mouth stuffed full of rice and tuna-mayo filling. He chuckles and takes a sip of his tea before getting into his breakfast, turning his head to the side and watching the beautiful scenery outside. After a moment, he turns back over to you and watched you take more rice balls from the tray, your eyes looking over him while he motions you to take more.
“Make sure you drink some tea as well.” He says, wiping the bits of rice grains from his chin and mouth while reaching for another rice ball.
You could say that this was the very first breakfast you’ve had in a while and actually enjoyed. You were thankful that this man had picked you up off the side of that gravel path and took you in. You were rather quick to show gratitude for him. You watched as he chewed and munched on his rice ball and he peeks back over to you, making you quickly turn away from him while he lets out a little giggle.
“It’s okay to stare, many women stare at me and you’re no different. Well- Maybe you’re one of the very few to get a good look at me up close.” He says, reaching over handing you another rice ball. You take the rice ball from his hands and bite down into it while still staring at him.
You were happy that this man wanted to make sure you were nice and full, hell you were more surprised at his kindness more than anything. Not many people would just pick up a low classed woman up off the street or path out of pure kindness. Not unless if it was another low class person…
You could tell by the looks of his home and attire that he was a man of higher class and status, but what did a man like him want to do with a lower class woman such as yourself? It made you think a bit deep on it.
What would this man want with you…?
After breakfast, the young man pours a bit more green tea into your tea cup to which you’d gladly accepted and slowly sipped. “Now I can discuss this with you. My name is Roronoa Zoro and I’m a samurai of a higher class and status than you. I don’t mean to be rude when I say that…” He says, sipping more green tea from his tea cup. You nodded as he continued speaking, his eye peering down at you with slight interest.
“If you don’t mind me asking, what’s your name young woman?” He asked you, setting his tea cup down onto the table as he slowly stood up and pressed his feet against the tatami mats. You watched as he brushed down his kimono, making sure there weren’t any bits of grains of rice or filling on him. Your gazing causes you to fall quiet, the sight of him peering back down at you causing you answer him quickly.
“It’s ________ sir...” You responded, propping yourself up against your hands while you watched him slowly sit back down. He smiles at your manners as he reaches out for the tea pot and pours himself another cup of tea.
You watched him slowly pour more of the tea into his tea cup, the steam spilling out of the kettle alongside with the tea. He sets his kettle down before picking up his tea cup, a soft sigh leaving his lips while he got a good waft of the tea. “A beautiful name you have. It fits you young lady.” He says, blowing at his tea to cool it off.
You blushed at his response.
“T-Thank you.” You responded, staring at the rice balls sitting on the tray as you still yearned for more to fill you up. Zoro catches your eye and chuckles at your gaze. “Please if you want some more they’re free for you to take. I know how hungry you must be after not eating for so long. They’re all for you.” He says, pulling the tray closer to you and urging you to eat more.
“A-Are you sure sir? You’re full enough to where you don’t want more?” You asked with respect, your eyes staring up at him and into his singular eyes. He nods in response and chuckles. “Please. Take them.” He says for the final time, taking the last sip of his tea and pushing his tea cup away before sighing out in fullness.
You took a bite of another rice ball and you both sat there in silence, the sounds of the outside nature breaking most of it. You sat there and chewed hungrily before your eyes slowly trails back up to Zoro. He was looking outside at the scenery once again, inhaling deeply as he watched it all without a thought in his mind.
Your verbal thoughts finally breaks the silence for both you and him.
“M-May I ask, why did you save me sir? Surely someone of higher status such as yourself wouldn’t care about someone like me correct?” You asked out of pure curiosity, wondering why a man of high class like this swordsman save you?
He turns to you and sighs out before sitting up straight.
“No one deserves a fate such as yours. I can tell that you’ve suffered much in your life. Why not be granted a second chance.” He says lightly, his eyes trailing down at the low table while his fingers tapped at it.
Your eyes widens in response but he wasn’t finished speaking yet.
“I don’t see lower class like how people of my status would see them.” He admits, his head resting against his hand.
Your eyes glistened with admiration. “Wow…T-Thank you sir…Thank you so much! Please let me repay you.” You responded happily, bowing down to him while he watched. Your response catches his ear and making him react with a smile. He presses his fingers to his chin before looking and smirking down to you.
“Well ________, I need someone to work things around my estate while I’m away on my trips. Since you’re a lower class woman, do you mind becoming the maid of my estate?” He asked you nonchalantly, watching as your head slowly rises up from the tatami mats.
Your eyes were wide with shock and you cover you mouth at his question. “I…I’d be honored sir! Yes please!“ You say, bowing down to him once again out of gratitude. Slight tears began brewing within your eyes as you tried your best to contain your emotions and excitement from this whole ordeal. He chuckled and presses his hand against your chin, lifting your head and wiping your sudden tears away.
“Please, no need to bow young lady. It’s fine as long as you can do your tasks correctly for me. You’ll now live under my roof alongside me as my maid.” He says to you, cupping your face with his roughly-scarred hands.
You sniveled and held on to his hands, biting your lower lip while your brows furrowed. Finally and somehow, a miracle had finally fell upon you. You finally felt needed and wanted by someone and had a job granted to you.
Regardless if you didn’t know how to work as a maid, you were damn sure that a maid was what he needed around his estate and that he’ll provide anything he can to help with your position.
Not that you didn’t know how…it was the point.
“T-Thank you so much sir…T-Thank you…” You thanked him, shedding a bit more tears as you stared up into his eye. He nods and wipes more of your tears away before standing up, leaving his tea set and tray on the table as he walked over to the shoji screen door.
“Stay here for a moment, I need to grab you some fresh clothes.” He says, sliding the screen open and walking out of the room, leaving you alone in the room to shed your hot and happy tears.
You looked outside and smiled to yourself. “Thank you…Thank you so much…” You said to yourself, pressing your hands together and putting them to your temple.
You wipe your tears away and perk up as you hear Zoro walk back into the room with fresh kimono linens and an obi (kimono sash) for you. On top of those linens were charms for your hair, matching hair charms that complimented the kimono linens. “Here’s some fresh clothes and towels for you, you’ll start after you bathe. The bathroom is farther down the estate, if you want I can show you where it is.” He explains to you, holding a hand out to you to help you up.
You grip his hand and he pulls you up easily before handing you the linens and charms. “Please show me where it is…I don’t know your estate very well…” You say sweetly to him to which he nods in response. “Follow me then.” He says with charm before turning around. He slowly began to walk out of the room and you followed behind, looking around and realizing how large the place was.
For the only samurai living here, it was a very big place he had. Though that didn’t bother you, you were excited to be around in a larger home.
You followed him down the estate and into a large bathroom where the water was already ran in the tub for you. The fresh scent of mint and honey filled the bathroom and you hum out in delight at the aromatic scent. Zoro smiles at your reaction, thanking himself in his mind that he picked out the correct scents for you to enjoy.
“If you need anything please don’t hesitate to call out for me. I’ll be right outside.” He says before walking out of the bathroom, shutting the door softly behind himself. You sigh out and smiled as you set down the linens down onto a wooden stool, the fresh scent filling your nose which made you grow eager to jump into the bath.
You began pulling the bow of your obi, loosening it and pulling it off before sliding your tattered and torn kimono off of your body. The dirty linen of the kimono fell onto the stone floor and you slowly begin walking over to the bathtub before staring down at the hot and steaming water.
You slowly dipped your toes into the water, humming at the temperature before fully setting half of your calve down into the water.
You lowered yourself into the bathtub, sighing out happily as the warm water immediately your relaxed your body in alongside the sweet honey and minty fresh scent.
You lied there for a good while and smiled to yourself, thinking about how nicer your life would be working as Zoro’s maid. You were positive that the job wouldn’t be so hard for you. You knew how to cook and clean very well from your mother. Washing clothes and dusting didn’t seem like much of an issue for you so you were sure this opportunity was going to be a piece of cake.
You giggled to yourself before grabbing a fresh washcloth and soap, scrubbing hard at your skin and enjoying the feeling of the suds.
As you began to stand up from the water and scrub more, you began to feel…a bit uneasy. You felt as if someone was watching you with their eyes, looking at you scrub at your dirtied skin without your acknowledgment.
You slowly peer around amongst the steam filling the washroom and noticed the shoji door being cracked, opened just a smidge. You quirk a brow and slowly sat back down, the water splashing a bit as you did. You could’ve sworn Zoro closed that door all the way. You saw him do it for sure.
So why was the door cracked open…?
Zoro must’ve forgotten to close it all the way. It has to be your mind playing tricks on you. You shrugged it off and sink farther into the water, a soft sigh leaving your lips as you did. You begin to wash your hair after washing your body, your hair desperately needing a wash after waiting for so long. You kept your eyes on that door as you scrubbed at your scalp, knowing that it was closed when Zoro had walked out.
Your fingers were beginning to prune and the warm water had turned cold by then. It’s been so long since you had a bath that you didn’t want to step out regardless of how cold the water had gotten. Though you had to get out, the water was rather dirty from how much grime that coated your body hours before you got in.
You sighed out and slowly stepped out of the tub before running the faucet again, rinsing off the dirty ring that rounded about the white clean porcelain of the tub. You slowly walk over and reach out for your towels, drying yourself and your hair thoroughly to make sure now a drop of water lingered on your body.
As you dried off your body and reach out for kimono linens you paused at the sudden chill that ran down between your legs which was bare and open.
You look around and then thought about it.
Zoro hadn’t offered you hand undergarments at all.
A blush coated your cheeks as you before to walk over to the shoji door, reaching a hand out without much thought. A sudden look at the state of the sliding door makes you pause and your eyes began to widen.
The door was in fact cracked open which meant that your mind wasn’t playing tricks on you from the beginning. Your hand began to shake as you pressed it to the door and slowly slide it open, peeking your head out and looking around.
No one was there to be seen so you sighed out to yourself and hoped that maybe…it was just your mind and that maybe Zoro didn’t close the door all the way. “Um! Sir? Are you around? I need you for a moment!” You yelled out, looking both left and right of the hallway while you began to hear footsteps come down the left side. “In a moment. I’ll be there.” You hear Zoro’s voice call out firmly, his footsteps sounding like he was taking his time walking towards you.
He slowly walks towards you and stops midway, not wanting to disrespect your privacy. “What is it that you need?” He asked you, his arms crossed as he looks down at your head that poked out past the doors. You giggle nervously to him before sighing out in slight embarrassment.
“You didn’t give me any undergarments. Do you have any women’s underwear or such like that?” You asked him, the embarrassment now written all over your face. Zoro freezes for a moment before scratching his head. “Ah…Now that you mention it to me…I don’t. I just have kimono linens for visitors. I’ll go out and get you some, until then please try and be patient with me alright?” He says, a bit of a nervous smirk spread across his face while he watched you slowly pull your head back into the bathroom.
“Is there anything else you may need help with?” You hear him ask you, your arms picking up the linens and sliding them on. As you began to throw your kimono on, you look around for a mirror and realized that there wasn’t one at all in the bathroom.
“Ah- Yes! May you tie my obi and hair up for me please? There’s no mirror in here!” You responded, holding your kimono closed before walking over to the sliding door. You slide the door open and motioned for him to come in, which he does. He slowly walks in and picks up your obi up off of the stool before wrapping it around your midsection.
He pulls it back a bit before tying it into a lovely bow while you stood there and felt his hands mend at your midsection. “Here, turn around for me. Since there’s no mirror I could put your charms along your hair for you too.” He says politely, offering to help with your hair as well. He slowly walks over to bathroom closet and digs around, finding a matching colored ribbon to help tie your hair up with.
He pulls your hair back and ties it up into a nice yet semi-drenched bun before picking up the charms one by one and putting them in your hair. As you watched him put the charms along your temple, your face began growing hot the more your stared up at his face.
You couldn’t help but to admire how handsome he was and how helpful he was with women garments. You assumed he might’ve had a wife or a lover before you had showed up, nothing else could explain how skilled he was at tying a bow or fixing up your hair.
You watched as he steps back and smiles, admiring how beautiful you were freshened up and clean. “You look wonderful. Beautiful in fact.” He says, chuckling to himself as he begins to walk out of the bathroom. You smile and blush at his words before gathering the dirty towels and linens on the floor.
You stood there for a second before shrugging and rolling up your sleeves, the thought of cleaning up already running through your mind as you eye the drops of water on the floor and the bit of grime that was still visible in the tub. You cleaned up the bathroom and tried your best to restore it to the way it looked before, scrubbing up at the water and grime in the bathtub and fixing it back in the original order it was.
Just to give Zoro a good first impression.
You let out a heavy sigh of relief as you wiped your brows and stood up off of your knees and onto your feet. Your sleeves automatically unrolling slowly and your hands were a bit wet and sticky from all the cleaning you’ve just accomplished. You were sure that some amount of time had passed after cleaning up, your stomach already having its new appetite worked up after much of the work you’ve completed.
“________.”
You perk up at the sound of Zoro’s voice, hearing him call out your name down the farther end of the hall. You quickly rushed yourself, picking up the dirty towels and linens once again before rushing out of the bathroom and into the hallway.
“I’m coming sir!” You responded, rushing and practically running down the hallway while you hear him call out for you again.
You stop as you see his tall figure and breathed heavily as you stood there before him. “I-I’m here sir! W-What did you need-“ You began to ask him a question but suddenly froze as you noticed him slipping on his geta shoes and grabbing his three katanas.
You frowned as you watched him fix himself up.
”Y-You’re heading out a-already?” You asked, watching as he slid his katanas into his waist strap that held them up and kept his kimono together. He froze as he heard the disappointment in your voice and sighs out as well before shutting his eye slowly.
“Yes, I need to go out and I won’t be back until nightfall.” He says to you, walking over to you and pressing his hand to your head where your soft strands rested. You give him a bit of a sad look, a bit upset to see him leaving so early already. It hadn’t even been that long since you met him and had breakfast together. He notices your saddened look and gives you a pleasant smile.
He cups your face with one of his hands and moves in close, your noses close to touching each other as he stared into your eye. Though he hesitates and pulls away, nearly forgetting that you both had only just met each other not too long ago. Part of you wanted to reach out so badly and pull him back towards you.
“I promise you’ll see me again as soon as night falls. I have a few tasks you’ll need to do tonight, okay?” He says to you, making you perk up with slight excitement. You smile and nodded to him before asking him what the tasks would be for you.
“The bedrooms needs a bit of dusting….and when I get home I expect dinner on the table and…a hot bath to be ready as soon as I come back…” He says, rubbing the back of his neck with a groan. You smile and nodded in agreement. “Is it okay if I greet you every time you come back home?” You asked him. He smiles at your question.
“Of course you can.”
“I’ll make sure to bring back your undergarments as well.” He continues. “Thank you.” You responded, bowing to him and watching as he began to walk away from you.
“Anything specific you’d like for dinner?” You asked him as you lifted your head, making him halt and turn to you. He smirks, a slight chuckle leaving him. “Surprise me.” He says playfully to you. You nodded and waved him goodbye but he halts once more, as if he forgot to say one more thing.
“One last thing you need to follow…”
“Don’t leave my estate unless I say so. Understand?”
His entire tone had shifted and caused you to shudder at his words. You nodded your head but he stood there, still staring at you as if he wanted a certain type of response from you. “I need a worded answer.” He says firmly to you.
You froze for a moment before speaking back out to him. “W-What if I need groceries for our future breakfasts and dinners?” You asked him, taking a step forward to him as you worded your question carefully. “I can take care of all of that. Just obey my wishes and stay here as you’re told to.” He says deeply, his tone dripping with seriousness while his eye gave it off.
You you kept your mouth closed and bowed in response to him, making him loosen up and smile.
“Y-Yes sir…I understand.”
“Good. I’ll be back. Finish those tasks for me please.” He says, finally walking down and turning the corner. You sigh out heavily as if you were holding your breath within his presence. His tone sounded like he wasn’t going to say what he said a second time, he was genuinely serious.
Not that you didn’t know that, the man was a samurai with morals and a cold hard attitude. Why wouldn’t he be serious about what he had just told you? It made you worry for what would happen if you didn’t complete your tasks or do them correctly as you’re told.
Your heart began to feel heavy at the thought but that wasn’t going to push you away from this offer. You sighed and shook off the feeling, walking down the hallway and back to your assigned room with your dirty linens.
Even though he didn’t provide directions of the bedrooms, you had more than plenty of time to do what he asked for you to do. Living in the home of a serious swordsman made you feel protected, regardless if you didn’t know Zoro that much.
You had a great feeling that you would enjoy this experience more than your previous life that you were close to leaving.
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milkyplier · 8 months ago
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@skyward-floored made this post the other day and it gave me ideas. As it is 3,000 words long, I thought it’d be too long for a reblog, so here we are. Thank you for the inspiration, and I hope you like it, Peggy!! ❤️
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Read the fic under the cut
“So, what was he like?” Warriors asks conversationally as he sits down before the fire, settling down to eat his dinner of rice.
Marin looks up from her own bowl and hums a questioning acknowledgment. “Mm?”
“You mentioned you knew another Link before.” Warriors shoves a spoonful of rice in his mouth. “What was he like?”
Marin nods, and ponders for a second, a dreamy glaze over her eyes. Warriors recognizes it in the other soldiers he talks to when they mention the loved ones they left behind. Marin opens her mouth as if to speak, the words still evading her for a moment. When they come, they’re wrapped tenderly in admiration and wistfulness.
“He was…like a dream. He was…he was everything I was missing. I told him that I wished I could fly, and he made me feel that I could. I told him I wanted to see the world, and he became it for me, and I saw him every day. His hands were rough and calloused, but he chose not to be calloused in character. He looked at me like I was everything, and he was smart and he was kind and you could see it all in his eyes. And those eyes, they were blue, bluer than the sea where it kisses the sky on the horizon.” She smiled, face turned towards the sky, mind far away from the campfire.
Warriors doesn’t know what to say. He’s heard a lot of people gush about their loved ones, but there is something about the way Marin speaks, careful and sure, that surprises him. He feels he shouldn’t be hearing this—like it was meant for her Link’s ears only, and he was eavesdropping. He’s saved the trouble of an initial response when Marin speaks again.
“I can still hear him so clearly. I can still feel his hair beneath my fingers. I remember him so well…but it all feels like a dream, I feel…that it all *was* a dream, im a way. And, verily, all dreams must come to an end. I wonder if he remembers me, and I wonder if he misses me as badly as I miss him. I’m sure he’s got better things to worry about. But…maybe that’s better. If I hurt this badly, I don’t want him to feel it at all. He told me stories of his past, and he’s lost so much and gained so little…it would be better if he didn’t remember me and was saved the pain of missing me. But then…I wish he did remember me. We loved each other…I hope he remembers me as fondly as I do him.” Marin looks at Warriors, browns eyes brimming with heartache. “Is that selfish?”
Her expression is pleading—silently begging for an answer Warriors is certain he has no business giving. But he can’t leave her hanging. He swallows.
“No. I don’t think it’s selfish. I think…I think he thinks the same thing. I think he lies awake at night, and thinks about you. I think he carries you with him everywhere, in a way, and I think that in a world full of gold and glory and titles, you are his greatest treasure. And I think it will always be that way, for him.”
The lapse in conversation is taken over by the crackle of the fire, and for a few minutes Warriors just watches the sparks curl up towards the night sky. Eventually, with a sniffle, Marin speaks again.
“You Links…you’re all the same, aren’t you?” She says with a watery laugh. “So caring and sensitive. You and him would have gotten along well.”
Warriors chuckles. “I’ll take your word for it.”
* * *
It’s Legend.
Warriors knows as soon as he meets him. They shake hands, and then Warriors finds himself staring into a pair of bright blue eyes.
Blue eyes, as blue as where the sea kisses the sky on the horizon.
They’re sharp, too, Warriors can see Legend taking in a thousand little details even in the brief second they make eye contact, and then introductions continue and Warriors is left reeling under the feeling of having met a ghost.
Later, he talks himself off that ledge. He’s paranoid—as soon as he heard they were all named Link, he’d been on the lookout. He was just paranoid, looking for the first guy who matched Marin’s description, when it was an unrealistic endeavor anyways. Marin hadn’t mentioned any defining physical traits—all the Links had blue eyes, the same blue eyes, in fact, and calloused hands. Everything else had been regarding his character, the way he treated her and made her feel. And Warriors definitely wasn’t getting any first-hand examples of those.
As the weeks go by and Warriors gets to know them all, he ignores the insistent instinct that Marin’s lover is Legend and instead analyses everyone else. And they all fall epically and tragically short. Wind was talkative and never mentioned a Marin, despite telling plenty of stories all staged at sea, and if Warriors was understanding things correctly, Wind was close to a pirate girl named Tetra. Nothing romantic, per se, but everything about Wind simply had the wrong…vibe. That was all Warriors could really argue. Since Marin never mentioned physical traits, it could have been any of them, really, leaving Warriors main method of deduction as whatever his gut was feeling.
Wild ruled himself out with his own Zelda, and most of his story came out fairly early in their journey and no Marin was ever mentioned. Twilight spoke of a girl who had broken his heart, and his melancholy demeanor didn’t match the wistful longing Warriors thought he should have had. Sky was happily courting, Hyrule much too shy, and Four too active and analytical.
Warriors briefly thought it could be Time—he spoke of his wife with utmost adoration. But then they met her, and although Warriors was surprised at her strange likeness to Marin, knew it definitely wasn’t Time.
Which left, as Warriors had originally and always known, Legend. And it only grew more obvious as the time passed.
He guessed exactly who Time married, because he loved someone near the same. He could be snarky and bold when he talked to them, ruthless and calculated in a fight, but Warriors saw the way he interacted with kids and people in the villages they stayed at or passed through. It was as if he’d flipped a switch, and suddenly he was the gentlest and softest person Warriors had ever met. Meeting him in person strengthens the way Marin had described him—hands rough and calloused by his past and traumas, but he chose purposely not to let it sour his character. And he did it all at the ripe age of 18.
All of this, of course, fell into place weeks after their initial meeting, and when it finally did Warriors was left with an entirely new problem: getting Legend to confirm it.
He knew in his heart, sure, that Legend was in fact the Link Marin had loved so deeply. But he could only be 99% sure. That last one percent would come as soon as Legend mentioned her, but Warriors is impatient to wait for it to happen organically. But he also doesn’t want to just walk up to him and mention it—he respects Legend, sure, but that isn’t enough to bridge the gap of familiarity. It isn’t enough to explain the awful feeling Warriors has. It isn’t enough to cover the possibility—probability—that if Warriors is too impatient, it could lead to insensitivity and the last thing Warriors wants to do is dredge up bad memories when Legend is caught in a place where he can’t run.
Ultimately, Warriors can only wait. No matter how anxious he is, he places his money on the goddesses having everything planned out already, and his chance will come when it comes. Which it does, and sooner than the Captain expected.
Months have passed since they first met, and the group has grown much closer. Close enough to rifle through each other’s things, poke and prod at other, compete for largest scar and in general, act very much like brothers. And Warriors has grown to consider them so; in a way he never has with anyone else, Warriors loves them as if they are all of the same flesh and blood. And after that, his mission is no longer delivering one last message. It is giving his brother a vital piece of information. He no longer owes it to him because of Marin or out of perceived obligation. He owes it to him because to keep it to himself would be to lie to his brother.
Well. Maybe not directly, but still. It would feel like lying.
Thus, one warm and humid evening somewhere in Time’s Hyrule, deep in some woods somewhere, when Legend stands up and stretches and declares he’s going on patrol, Warriors jumps straight the chance to accompany him. The silence is peaceable at first, and the two heroes walk through the woods, eyes peeled and ears open for any sign of monsters. The camp noises fade far behind them, replaced by the sounds of a forest preparing for bed. It’s broken when Legend stops abruptly.
“What?” Warriors asks, stopping too and looking around. “Did you see something?”
“What do you want?”
Warriors stops and looks at Legend. “What?”
“What do you want?” Legend repeats, eyes boring into Warriors’ soul. They betray no sign of hostility or wariness, and neither does Legend’s tone. It’s short and to the point. “I can tell you’ve got something on your mind. You have since we first met. I thought you must have recognized me, but I know I’ve never seen you before in my life. So what is it?”
Warriors blinks. Damn, the kid is perceptive. He struggles to find the words, everything sounding too soon, too indifferent, too harsh. Shouldn’t there have been a more gentle lead up to this? Then again, Warriors has no idea how he would have achieved that, either.
“Spit it out,” Legend says impatiently. “I’m not a little kid, I can take it. Are you mad I smeared mud on your face the other day? Because if that’s the case I’m not apologizing, I was perfectly justified—“
“Marin.” Warriors says, and Legend’s jaw snaps shut. His whole body stiffens, something flickers in his eyes—good natured annoyance turns to fear, ever so briefly, before he relaxes again. He’s deadly calm now, attention completely on Warriors. He doesn’t say anything, so Warriors keeps going.
“I met a girl during the war. Her name was Marin. She had red hair and a blue and purple dress and she could sing like no one else. When we met, and I told her my name, she smiled and said that she knew a Link, once. That was you, wasn’t it?”
Legend nods stiffly. Warriors hesitates. Again, words evade him. Legend doesn’t care.
“That’s not everything.” His voice is almost monotone. “Tell me.”
Warriors opens his mouth. No words come out.
“Captain.” It’s harsh this time, almost anxious. “Say it.”
“…She’s gone.”
* * *
“Spit it out. I’m not a little kid, I can take it. Are you mad I smeared mud on your face the other day? Because if that’s the case I’m not apologizing, I was perfectly justified—“
“Marin.”
Legend hates the cold shock that shudders through his whole body when Warriors says it. He forces himself to stay calm, taking a deep breath and exhaling through his nose. His silence prompts Warriors to continue.
“I met a girl during the war. Her name was Marin. She had red hair and a blue and purple dress and she could sing like no one else. When we met, and I told her my name, she smiled and said that she knew a Link, once. That was you, wasn’t it?”
Legend nods. He can tell that isn’t what Warriors wanted to tell him. Not all of it, anyway.
“That’s not everything. Tell me.”
Silence.
“Captain.” He feels the faint tendrils of desperation prickling at his heart. “Say it.”
“…She’s gone.”
Legend doesn’t understand at first. Maybe, unconsciously, he doesn’t want to understand.
“What? Of course she is. She…she has been, for awhile now, and she clearly isn’t here—“
“Legend. She’s dead.”
There’s no way he can misunderstand that. He can’t feel the rest of his body. He just keeps standing there, staring hardly at Warriors’ face.
“What.”
“She…she died, Legend. I’m sorry. She fought long and hard, but ultimately the enemy overtook her. She didn’t…she didn’t even have a chance.”
Legend keeps staring at him for a second, and then he shifts his gaze to the ground. He feels sick. He’s shaky and weak, and after a minute, he just sits down.
Warriors knew Marin during his war. Which meant she survived. Somehow, she had survived Koholint, even though it was a dream.
And then she died in that war.
The irony. It’s so ironic, in a sick and twisted way, he can taste it. Uncalled for, a chuckle escapes him, and then a soft laugh, and then he’s just cackling outright, loud, humorless laughter because of course she survived. Of course the Windfish would spare her, of course Legend find that out in an information of her death somewhere else.
Of course Legend would only find out that he didn’t kill her after she had died at someone else’s hand.
He laughs, and he laughs, and he laughs until Warriors is shaking his shoulders and telling him to snap out of it. He does his best, but ultimately all he can do is grasp Warriors’ forearms and look into his eyes, still chuckling breathlessly.
“…Of course.” He says. Warriors looks genuinely afraid of what Legend will say next. “Of course, the goddesses would let me blame myself. Of course they would let me spend all this time hating myself, until they knew there was no way she could distract me.”
Warriors is visibly confused. “What?”
“That’s got to be it…right? There’s nothing…I don’t know why else they would do this. How…could I be so damn unlucky? I’ve lost her twice. How do I keep doing this?” He laughs again, but when it fades out he’s too short of breath and his eyes burn. Scalding tears sear his cheeks, and he doesn’t know if he’ll survive how badly his heart hurts. Not again.
Warriors shifts to tuck him completely against his chest, holding him tightly, as if he could absorb the pain somehow.
“I’m sorry,” he murmurs into Legend hair. “I’m so sorry.”
* * *
Legend cries for a long time, and violently enough that Warriors wonders if he’s getting enough air. They’re incredibly vulnerable here, and when Warriors hears something approaching through the woods, he jumps up and very nearly stabs Wolfie as he jumps through the bushes. Wild is close behind him, and once Warriors knows it’s just them he returns to Legend.
“Whoa!” Wild yelps softly as he sees Warriors gathers the limp and unyielding Veteran into a bridal carry. “Is he—“
“He’s not injured.” Warriors assures him, shifting his hold on Legend so it’s more comfortable for them both. “He just heard some pretty shocking news and it hit hard.”
Wild nods, understanding immediately and offering no further inquiries.
“You guys have been gone so long we started to worry. Supper’s way past over and we were about to get ready for bed when we realized you hadn’t returned, so we split up and went searching,” Wild explains his sudden appearance.
“Sorry, we didn’t mean to cause any trouble.” Warriors apologizes sincerely.
“It’s alright. Just as long as no one’s hurt.”
The walk back is silent, and Warriors has never been so glad to see bed rolls surrounding a campfire. Legend isn’t asleep, but he’s sluggish and almost unresponsive. Wild digs his bed roll from his bag while Warriors coaxes him to at least take off his boots, and then as soon as he’s tucked into his bed roll, he’s asleep. Warriors, searching to offer a little bit more comfort, undoes his scarf and lays it over the Veteran like a blanket. He doesn’t know that it will actually do much in the way of support, but it makes him feel better so he leaves it.
Warriors himself stays awake until every searching member of the chain has returned, just to explain what took them so long. Any anger at the inconvenient scare dissipates upon hearing how it came to be, and seeing the Veteran curled up in his bed roll. Arguably, they can’t really tell by his face that he’s been distressed—but the fact that he was already asleep when they all got back, and that he remained asleep throughout the remainder of bedtime prep, spoke for itself. Even though Warriors didn’t say exactly what Legend was told, the weight of the situation falls on them all, and except to establish watches, no more words are spoken for the rest of the night.
* * *
Not a word passes Legend’s lips for a week. His mood seems to shift through the days; at first he is almost angry, going everywhere and about everything with a hard purpose, refusing to let his emotions get the better of him. And then one day, he loses that battle as soon as he wakes up, and is the last one for the rest of the week. The last one to get out of bed, the last one to pack up, the last one to start and the last one to stop.
The others do their best to accommodate him, no matter how much time they lose. They can tell he’s trying, even when he’s too tired to. They’ve all been there, in some way, at some point in time. They all give him space, they do their best to silently convey that they’re there for him when he wants to reach out.
Everyone, that is, save Wind. And it is Wind, surprisingly, who breaks him out of it all.
He’s annoying, at first, sticking to Legend’s side like glue and chattering away at every hour of the say. Legend comes very close to strangling him more than once, but that all fades with the anger. The week continues, and Wind’s constant talking fills the silence, the lighthouse on the hill during a storm. He doesn’t realize it until later, but Wind was always helping hold him together. His every story, his every mundane topic was all meant to keep Legend from getting trapped in his own head. From forgetting the feeling of grass beneath his boots and the sound of his brothers as they all walked on.
An evening almost seven days exactly from that first, Legend is sitting in front of the fire, leaned against a log. Wind sits on the log next to him. For the first time in a week, the Sailor is quiet, and not because his mouth is full of food. Then,
“What was she like?”
The question is a violent shift from anything else Wind had said before. His cheery, story-telling tone is gone, replaced instead with tentativeness. It’s soft and curious, worried he’s overstepped. Legend glances around the fire, and the rest of the Chain has all stopped. There’s some tension as they wait for Legend’s response, unsure if he’ll answer or if it will have a negative effect. Legend’s eyes settled back on the fire and he sighs.
“She was my everything.” He looks at Wind, who is watching him with rapt attention. “You would have liked her.”
He doesn’t know what else to say. Words can’t really describe her, anyways.
“Could she sing?” Wind asks. Legend nods.
“Yes, she could sing.”
“What did she look like?”
“…She had red hair, and big brown eyes, and she could get anything out of me with those eyes.”
Wind laughs. “She sounds like Malon.”
Legend smiles. “She was a lot like Malon. Of Malon were a goddess, they’d be almost the same.” He looks at Time. “No offense, Old Man.”
“None taken,” Time says softly, a glimmer of amusement in his eyes.
A comfortable silence settles over the camp for a few moments.
“She once asked me if it was selfish of her to hope you remembered her.” Warriors says suddenly. “I said it wasn’t.”
Legend nods again. “You were right.” He looks up at the unfamiliar stars, and wonders if she now knows he never forgot.
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astridthevalkyrie · 7 months ago
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your match is made | xavier x reader
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“I know,” he continues, tucking a piece of your hair behind your ear, “that the people in our classes, the nobles, the folks in the marketplace, they all hold me in high regard.” “Xavier,” you try to argue weakly, already feeling your heartbeat speed up from where this conversation is going. The thought of losing him, of losing your best friend, your prince, your everything, it is paralyzing. “Please don’t—” “I know that my weapon of choice is a longsword.” “Stop,” you whisper. But he doesn’t, and he looks directly into your eyes with an open, honest sincerity written all over his face. Like this is his truth, even though it is yours. “And I know that you have known me all your life, and I feel that I have known you for even longer than that.”
cw: fluff, like that's it that's literally it this is so fluffy
word count: 6.6k
a/n: lyric credits used in this fic: téir abhaile riú by celtic woman <- fire song btw, listen to bless your ears, it also sets the vibe of this fic very nicely tbh. jeremiah's my favorite boyfailure.
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Lanterns hang from every available line in and around the town square, brightening any block lucky enough to fall under its horizon. In every corner and roadblock, there are carts littering the streets, dozens upon dozens of merchants calling out their best prices on their finest goods, all the way from fabrics stitched by the very same threads used for the royals’ robes, to common sweet chocolates that all the teenagers are purchasing in bulk to share with their friends and younger siblings. There is room to move around, but there is not a single area that is not bustling with people, either trying to purchase steamed corn from the stalls or simply enjoying the festivities with their families. And in the center of it all, the bards play with such finesse that their fingers may as well be the source of the music rather than the instruments. 
Such is the celebration of lights, a celebration of the light. Of Philos, of this miracle that humanity has been gifted with. Every year without fail, the people gather in the town square to commemorate this historic occasion, and every year without fail, it is the grandest jamboree you have ever bore witness to.
“C’mon, Xavier,” Jeremiah protests out loud, “what would be the point of having the crown prince with us if he refuses to pay for our meals?”
Xavier simply shakes his head, the serene smile never leaving his face as he denies Jeremiah for the third time tonight—he clearly derives great pleasure from doing it. “I’d hate to rob you of the chance to participate in Philos’ market tonight of all nights.”
Jeremiah groans at his right, and from Xavier’s left, you giggle. It’s the same routine every single year, and at every occasion to be honest, and yet Jeremiah never stops trying to emphasize the difference in his wealth versus the royal family’s. Xavier, who you think would give his last dime to an ant if it looked hungry enough, looks like he loves refusing Jeremiah more than participating in any one of the activities tonight. 
The spicy aroma of rice cakes fills your senses then, and you let out a longing sigh as you look to the stall decorated with steaming bowls on all sides. “I’m starting to get hungry too, now.”
Both of them follow your gaze, where the vendor is hurriedly turning this way and that to discuss prices and accept payments, while three of his chefs work in the back, delivering more as the demand increases. Xavier hums quietly, then takes out a small black pouch from his pocket.
“I suppose it wouldn’t hurt to eat.” He holds out the bag for you to take, but before you can, Jeremiah scoffs, loudly.
“Oh, that’s sick.” He points an accusing finger at the prince. “That’s sick! If you keep playing favorites, you’re going to get betrayed when you take the throne, I hope you know. I swear I’m going to lead a revolution against you myself.”
“Do you really think my grandis knight would ever let you harm me?” Xavier shoots back, and you beam as Jeremiah rolls his eyes, snatching the pouch straight out of his fingers.
“I’ll take this, and I’m going to get two”—he holds up two fingers for emphasis—”two bowls, and I’m not sharing. Your grandis knight can split her portion with you.” With that, he stomps off in a huff, leaving Xavier with his head tilted and a confused expression on his face.
“I don’t understand. There should be enough coins for three bowls.”
“He’ll get you a bowl.” You raise your voice enough for Jeremiah to hear as he walks. “He’s very grateful that you offered your money, isn’t that right, Jermy?”
Jeremiah makes a rude gesture without even turning back to face you, and you laugh, grabbing Xavier’s wrist to follow him. If it were any other member of the royal family, they’d be getting swarmed right about now, and would likely require at least ten guards to stand around them at all times to ward people off. That is how the king and queen sit, a few blocks away from the main festival, up on a platform elevated high enough that no one could think to climb it, with Lightseekers both in front of them and on the ground, safe and observing the celebration from a distance. Philos’ crown prince is different. Xavier is out in the town with the common folk so frequently that he’s almost lost all the celebrity status his title comes with. Of course, that makes him popular in an entirely different way. The people in the market always seem happy that someone of such high status would lower himself enough to walk and talk amongst them.
His hand slips lower as the two of you go after Jeremiah, warm fingers intertwining with yours. You think little of it, reckoning he doesn’t want to get separated with so many people around. Xavier isn’t one to shy away from touch, at any rate. Once you spar with someone enough, it’s only natural to become physically comfortable with one another. He places his hands on your shoulders when he wants to guide you somewhere, bandages your cuts with his own calloused palms, presses his lips to your forehead to check whether you’re sick or not. In the face of all that, him holding your hand while running through a bustling crowd is hardly surprising.
Jeremiah is waving the pouch in the air hopelessly, trying to be noticed amongst the rest, when the vendor spots the two of you. “Xavier!” he calls happily. “Good timing, I have a fresh bowl ready just for you!”
“Unbelievable,” your chestnut-haired friend mutters under his breath, elbowing you as you laugh at his misfortune. Xavier steps closer, and you see him hold up two fingers to ask for more. When he points over, you wave to the vendor, who waves back before calling out instructions over his shoulder. In almost an instant, he has three steaming bowls filled with rice cakes ready for you to take. Your mouth almost waters at the sight. 
Xavier picks up one of them to offer to you, which you take gratefully. Taking a few steps to the side to avoid crashing into anyone, the three of you find a relatively less crowded place to dig in. 
Before you can take a heaping sip from the spoon, he gently takes your wrist and blows on the hot broth, meeting your eyes with a soft, concerned look. “Be careful.”
“I’m always careful,” you remind him teasingly, but blow some air of your own onto the spoon before finally digging in. As the flavors explode inside your palate, you hold back a moan at how good it tastes.
“Miss Knight!” a high-pitched voice calls out, and you turn in time to see a tiny pink blur moving past people’s legs. 
“Adelaide!” You hand your bowl to Jeremiah, who passes it to Xavier without even blinking, and kneel down to catch the blur in your arms. “Look at you, you look so pretty! I love your dress!”
The little girl’s eyes light up at the compliment. “Thank you! Miss Knight,” she bounces up and down eagerly, “I made something for you!” In her hands, she holds out a product of one of the several craft stalls set up for the children during the festival, a simple but elegant flower crown that she holds out like a grand prize. And from how your heart melts, it may as well be. 
“Oh, how beautiful. Thank you so much. Would you put it on for me?” You tilt your head down, and she places it on with all the care a child of six years would have. You know you’ll have a difficult time getting it out in a while after the flowers tangle with your hair, but you don’t mind at all. Adelaide is your favorite person to visit whenever the three of you come to town, the daughter of the seamstress who makes your uniforms, and you’d do anything to see her smile the way she is now.
“You look like a princess,” she says in awe. Your cheeks warm, and you stand up, gesturing to the other two.
“Speaking of which, you remember Xavier and Jeremiah, don’t you?”
Her small hands grip your dress robes as she hides behind your legs, peeking out at them. Xavier, with both his hands occupied holding your bowl and his own, merely smiles encouragingly at her, while Jeremiah waves. “Hiya, Adelaide. Your dress looks awesome!”
From the corner of your eye, you see her face turn bright red, and right as you’re about to coo inwardly about her adorable little crush, you hear someone calling her name. All your heads turn, as an older blonde boy, out of breath, almost pushes past people in his rush to run to her. 
“I told you not to run off like that! You could get lost—oh.” He stops short when he sees you, blinking as the color returns to his cheeks after his run. “H-hi there.”
“Hi, Neville.” You smile at Adelaide’s older brother, who’s almost always around when you visit. “Enjoying the celebration?”
“Definitely—I’m sorry I haven’t come to see you, I was helping Mother with her stall, a-and I didn’t know your master would give you the night off.”
“Oh, I wouldn’t miss this for the world. And the grandis knight is at the king’s side, he could hardly stay to train me on such an important night.”
“Right.” He stands with his hands on Adelaide’s shoulders, only staring, seemingly forgetting why he’s there in the first place. For a few moments, no words are said at all.
Right when you’re about to cough awkwardly, he snaps back to attention. “Um, would you like to dance?”
“She can’t,” Xavier says immediately, almost making you jump. He’s almost right behind you, looming over your shoulder and staring Neville straight in the eyes with an expression you’ve never seen on him before. 
“Xavier!” The blonde bows clumsily (and unnecessarily) before straightening up, an unspoken question in his eyes. He looks between you and Xavier, and while you hadn’t been planning to agree to his request in the first place, you look at Xavier curiously as well. He’s never before dictated what you do during the celebration, whether you’re with him and Jeremiah or with some of the others in your class. 
“She can’t,” he says again, a bit more softly, “she can’t, because…” He takes one glance at you, then down at the two bowls in his hand, then looks back up. “She’s already going to dance with Jeremiah.”
“What?” both you and your supposed dance partner question at the same time. 
“You’ve been meaning to ask her to dance the whole night.” Xavier’s blue eyes fall on Jeremiah, with a pointed gaze. “This song is about to end, I think now is as good a time as any.”
“But I’m eating!” he whines, shaking the bowl in his hands as though to beg Xavier to take pity on him.
“I’d be happy to dance with her before Jeremiah steps in—” Neville offers, but he’s cut off by Xavier again, and this time his voice is icier, and his eyes are narrowed on Jeremiah who’s pouting at him.
“No, I think Jeremiah should do it now before it’s too late.”
Whatever message he’s trying to get across, Jeremiah clearly understands it, groaning and taking one last sip before grabbing your hand and tugging you to the main grounds. You’re only slightly irked that no one actually waited for your answer on whether you wanted to dance or not. But you’re more confused than anything else. Just a few minutes ago, both of them were fine, what could have happened so soon to make Xavier sound so cold?
“Have you really been meaning to ask me to dance all night?” you try asking, but Jeremiah only rolls his eyes.
“Please shut up. I already have to deal with His Majesty the Oblivious Idiot tonight, I can’t deal with both of you.”
“What are you talking about—”
“Miss Grandis Knight!” one of the bards, the violinist, waves to you. You’re momentarily distracted, smiling at her. It’s quite nice, if maybe a bit egotistical, to hear anyone call you what you’re trying so hard to be even when you haven’t achieved it yet. “Coming to dance?”
“I am!” you shout back cheerfully. “Give me a good one!”
She thinks for a few seconds, then makes a motion to the other musicians. Placing the violin against her collarbone delicately, she begins to pluck a familiar tune, one that has you lighting up and has the crowd cheering. Even Jeremiah grins as the two of you face each other, both of you well versed in proper dance etiquette from taking the same classes growing up. 
First, he bows, mimicked by the other men in the large circle that’s formed, extending a hand to their dance partners. Then you, and the other ladies, curtsy, and with a light step you take his hand and begin the dance. The bards begin to sing the contagious melody, as you and Jeremiah step in place, back and forth, your arms extending then coming together, before he twirls you under his arm. Both of you are laughing for no real reason, perhaps aside from how frivolous this is compared to the fighting techniques you’re usually partaking in together.
The song builds, and builds, and his hands slip to your waist, helping you leap across him before he ducks his head dramatically. The violinist calls your name, pointing at you to sing the next verse. Through your giggles, your cheeks warm at the attention, but you oblige.
Swishing your dress around you, you bounce off Jeremiah, pointing at him with a flourish. “Come now and follow me down, down to the lights of Galway where—” Your eye catches Xavier’s, who’s watching you as though you’re the main event. With everyone else’s attention already on you, you’re not sure if you can possibly take any more, but something about his gaze makes your chest feel lighter, as though in this celebration of lights, the real light is the one staring at you, the one who has eyes for no one else. “There's fine sailors walking the town, and waiting to meet the ladies there!”
The bards take over the song again, yet the spell doesn’t break. As Jeremiah twirls you again and hands you off to the next man, switching dance partners easily, you beckon Xavier towards you, urging him to join. 
The night is young, you try to convey to him wordlessly, and I don’t want to be without you.
He steps forward, as you switch dance partners again. While you hadn’t meant to dance in the first place, it makes you feel lightheaded in a good way. The movements you have to do are light as opposed to rough and unforgiving on your muscles, and the alternating hands on your body handle you as gently as possible instead of trying to seek out all your weak points. 
Your head tilts to the side, trying to see if Xavier entered the fray or not. You’ve lost sight of him, in a different part of the circle now, and you can’t search properly without breaking the formation of the dance and ruining everyone’s fun. The next person you spin into ends up being Neville, who chuckles shyly and tells you, “Not bad, Miss Grandis Knight!”
His moves are far more stiff than Jeremiah’s, but far be it from you to judge when he hasn’t had formal training. The important thing is that he tries, and you still have fun, and besides, the song is ending now. You’re almost back to where you started in the circle, just one more spin and—
A familiar, calloused hand grazes yours, skimming down the side of your arm. You gasp at this touch, far more coarse than the others, and the only one to leave you breathless, not least because it’s accompanied by the striking blue of Xavier’s eyes. 
When he extends and brings you closer, it is more than just natural. Xavier is of royal blood, it is almost as if he was born to do this. Your feet step with his without you having to look down, so familiar with his balance and pace from years and years and years of sparring together. And not even once do you break away from his piercing gaze, because you’re nervous that if you do, he might just disappear.
The song comes to an end, with a final step forward and your hands on Xavier’s chest, and everyone erupts into cheers. The noise surrounding you makes the silence between you and him all the more deafening.
As the two of you simply stare at each other, breathing in sync, one of his hands reaches up, first resting on your cheek before then making its way up to gently adjust the flower crown that had slanted on your head while you were dancing. Once he fixes it, his head tilts down, just enough that his nose brushes against yours, and a smile forms on your lips.
“I am very pleased you joined, my liege.” Your eyes shine in gratitude.
Xavier opens his mouth to respond, and that’s exactly when Jeremiah chooses to slump against his shoulder, yawning. “Oh man, I’m spent. When do we go back to the academy?”
Xavier looks mildly disgruntled. “This is going to go on for hours,” you tell him, frowning, “we can’t leave now. Besides, the fireworks will start soon.”
“Another dance?” the crown prince suggests, sliding your palm into his. 
Jeremiah gives him an unimpressed look. “Give it a rest.”
Stepping past the two of them, you look at all the tables mostly occupied by children being distracted by someone painting little butterflies and stars on their faces or the tiny flutes that are passed out for them to blow into. One of the pastry vendors is handing out baked goods for free, and while you didn’t actually get any chance to eat earlier, you want to find something to actually do. You’re not tired after dancing; on the contrary, now you’re restless and brimming with energy. 
“Come on,” you declare readily, taking both their hands and pulling them into the ruckus. Your boys have little choice but to come along with you. Your feet will start to ache soon too, you’re sure. But for now, while they don’t, and while the way Xavier was staring at you is still burned into your mind, you want to enjoy yourself.
Once again, his fingers tangle with yours, clinging to your hand warmly—a stark difference to Jeremiah’s, which you have to grip onto harder to make sure he doesn’t get left behind. He whines and complains the whole time, telling you he’s sore all over and that the three of you should try and beat the rush by leaving early. You’re used to this routine every year, so you’re not fazed. Nor is he serious, because even though you could physically force him to stay, Jeremiah never tries to leave until you and Xavier are good and ready.
As you run, different students in your section call out to you and Jeremiah. People are just slightly more hesitant to address Xavier directly, but you’ve never understood such a thing. The last thing he is is intimidating. Well, maybe place a sword in his hand and he becomes slightly fearsome (to everyone except you). There’s still no need to pretend that Xavier ever struts around demanding everyone show him the highest respects. He’s the furthest thing from arrogant.
It makes you feel proud, really, knowing you’ll be in the service of Philos’ greatest king.
“Xavier!” someone finally calls out. For a second, you’re thrilled, until you see who it is, and your face falls.
The title of grandis knight comes with a certain authority. Not one that you actually have yet, of course, but people respect the current holder of the position, and as his prized mentee, that respect teeters down to you most of the time. 
Keyword being most.
Just a few months back, you and Lillia had been close friends. You weren’t as close to her as you were to Xavier and Jeremiah, but she was still someone you confided in. You knew a few personal things about her, and she knew a few personal things about you. It was nice to be able to talk to someone who wasn’t a guy, or your trainer, or one of the older students. Just another girl around your age training to become a Lightseeker.
But you should have realized that the respect you garnered by swearing to be the future king’s bodyguard came with a reasonable risk of betrayal as well. And yes, betrayal is a strong word. Technically, nothing happened. There is no accusation you can level at her. At least not without someone calling you hysterical, and that’s hardly needed when you’re already a woman seeking the highest position in the court, second only to the king himself.
It had come down to one night, with just you and her sitting and talking about nothing in particular, when she had leaned in and asked you something.
“So do you like anyone?”
It had been a quiet night, and the two of you had been the only ones awake, holed up in an old classroom, so you hadn’t thought any consequences could come from speaking truthfully—or at least, what you had genuinely believed to be the truth.
“Not really.” You’d shrugged, leaning back on the desk you were sitting on, putting your weight on your palms. “Most of the people in our section aren’t really my type.”
“Really?” Lillia had smiled slyly. “Not even Xavier?”
Your nose had wrinkled—not in disgust, just confusion. “Xavier? Why?”
“What do you mean? You two spend all your time together. You’re always sparring. Doesn’t romantic tension build up after something like that?”
“Maybe if we were equally matched,” you’d huffed, shaking your head, “I always beat him, I certainly don’t feel any tension. Besides, he’s going to be king. And I’m trying my best to be his grandis knight. We could never be in a relationship even if we wanted to be.”
“So you don’t have any interest in him?” she’d asked, a little more forcefully. You’d thought nothing of it at the time. 
“I mean…” Your stomach had twisted a bit uncomfortably and you’d averted your gaze. “If you had a sword to my neck, if I had to choose someone…”
And it had forced you to think about it. A far off scenario, if he wasn’t going to be the king, or if you weren’t going to be the grandis knight, or maybe both. It had been difficult to see Prince Xavier as anything else, but…it wasn’t impossible. If you were both just students, or partners, or even if you worked at that bakery that he loved to frequent. 
If you were just a normal person, and he was as common as everyone else, the first thing you’d thought you’d notice about him would be his eyes. It’s what you notice about him most of the time regardless. He has nice eyes. They have a sincerity in them that most people lack. And he looks at you a lot, so you would know.
He’s not bad to look at either. And he’s kind. A good leader. With a precious heart. And skilled fingers—
Blinking out of the hypnotic thoughts you’d fallen into, you’d hidden your suddenly flustered state as best you could and simply answered, “I suppose if I had to choose to love someone, I’d choose Xavier.”
And that had been that. Or so you thought. Everything had been alright, at least.
Until the next morning, when you’d walked out of your class and seen Lillia’s arms around Xavier’s neck. 
For a second, it had felt like Philos stopped turning on its axis. 
It wasn’t like Xavier had reciprocated. But that was only because he had been too polite to shove her away, and it would’ve been inappropriate to engage in anything further. Crown prince or not, he was still a guy, and obviously a pretty girl pressed into him in such a way would interest him.
And Lillia had caught your eye, and smiled triumphantly, as though to say well, if you don’t want him, then…
Even though you hadn’t said you didn’t want him. Well, you had said you weren’t interested, yes. But you had also told her that if someone held a blaster to your face if you didn’t cherish someone, then you would cherish Xavier. And maybe that hadn’t been a confession, but it hadn’t been you giving her permission to pursue him either. Not that she needed your permission, because it wasn’t like you had a claim on him, and it wasn’t supposed to make your chest burn that he, even for a second, looked at anyone else the way he looked at you.
You hadn’t confided your weak feelings to anyone else after that.
“Hi, Lillia,” Xavier says, snapping you out of your thoughts. You didn’t even realize until now that the three of you had approached her. “What’s this booth for?”
“Oh, it’s amazing,” she gushes, wrapping her hands around his arm and tugging. Your eye twitches. “She’s a fortuneteller. For just a few copper pieces, she’ll answer any one question you want to know about your life.”
“Really?” he asks softly, and all your gazes shift to the woman who bows her head to the prince, sitting in her chair with a purple drape over the small table in front of her. “I’m not sure what I’d want to ask.”
Lillia smirks in a way that makes you uneasy. “Well, I asked about my future partner.”
“Partner? For sparring?”
“For marrying, you dolt,” Jeremiah snorts, “c’mon, Xav, sit down and let’s see which unlucky soul gets to be queen of Philos.”
You’re nervous that he will, and you’re nervous that you won’t like the answer. Because it wouldn’t be you, you’re sure of that. And you shouldn’t want it to be you. That doesn’t mean you think he should be with her, either. What business did Lillia have pursuing Xavier, at any rate? She was training to be a Lightseeker too—but of course, the average knight did not have the same restrictions the grandis knight did—not that it matters because you have no say regardless—
But Xavier shakes his head. “No, it’s okay. My future partner will simply be…whoever the kingdom deems the loveliest of the lot.”
Your heart both inflates and deflates at his response. On one hand, you hadn’t wanted him to have his fortune read, for fear of heartbreak. On the other hand, a part of you had foolishly hoped that he would have the same option to love like everyone else did.
“You should do it,” Jeremiah nudges you with his elbow. Before you can protest, Lillia’s eyes light up.
“Oh, yes, you should! Here, come sit.” 
“Um, I don’t know.” Warily, you gaze over at the fortuneteller, who merely gives you a serene smile. “Is she going to give me someone’s name?”
“No, just a description. She told me my future partner would be someone of noble descent.” Lillia beams, showing off her too-perfect teeth, and suddenly you feel inadequate. You know what she’s implying, even if Xavier doesn’t. After all, there are very few people who would match that description.
So, not wanting to seem like a coward, because the king’s sword is anything but a coward, you step forward, sitting down in the leathery chair. You’re about to reach for your pocket to take out the copper pieces, when Xavier reaches over and places them in the fortuneteller’s palm, giving you an encouraging look that makes your heart sink. Perhaps you should have listened to Jeremiah earlier and called it a night.
When the woman takes your hand, she closes her eyes, running her thumb back and forth against your calluses. Your breath gets stuck in your throat, and you try not to move a muscle. For some reason, it feels like if you so much as twitch, you’ll get the wrong answers, and you’re not even sure what the right answers are. 
Her eyes open, piercing yours with a startling gaze. “Fascinating,” she murmurs, “I see three things about your lover.”
To hear that word—lover, instead of spouse or partner, makes your entire face feel hot. Lillia giggles, saying something under her breath that you don’t catch but makes you feel violent tendencies nonetheless.
“First, he is someone held in very high regard by all around him.”
Oh no.
“Second, a longsword is his weapon of choice.”
Oh no.
“And third, you have known him all your life.”
Well, she may as well have just screamed Xavier’s name at the top of her lungs.
Everyone is silent for a few seconds. There is a heavy pause in the air, because who else could she be referring to? Who else fits that exact description? All Lillia was told was she’d be with someone of noble descent, which could be at least a few people. The painful beating in your chest is onset because there is only one person that your fortune fits. 
You know it, he knows it, even Jeremiah and Lillia know it. 
So you do the only thing you can do. You calmly stand up, offer the fortuneteller a tight-lipped smile, and turn on your heel and run.
Behind you, a few different people call your name, though you note distinctly that Xavier isn’t one of them. After that, even if other people are still recognizing you and trying to get your attention, you can barely think straight enough to identify their voices, let alone respond. You run, out of the town square, out of the festival, out of the sight of anyone who could possibly perceive you.
You run as far as you can before your legs start aching, which, unfortunately for you, takes a long time with your endurance training. By the time you feel even a twinge resembling pain, you’ve already made it a far distance away from the celebration, near the seamstress’ shop. 
With gritted teeth, you heave yourself over the fence, knowing you’re more than welcome in her garden. It’s luscious, orange and lavender chrysanthemums in the center stealing the spotlight from all the other flowers. Instead of going towards them, you curl up next to the lilies, because you already feel unremarkable enough.
It’s not that you think Xavier would be disgusted by you. The two of you are friends—but that’s exactly it, the major problem of having feelings for him. Besides the fact that you are supposed to brandish your sword in his name, you cannot like him because you’d rather die than lose your best friend. You couldn’t even say how long you’ve known him, but you do know that he’s the best part of your life. Not for anyone would you bow your head. Not for anyone would you lay your life down. You’ve observed Xavier for years and years and there is not a single other person in the royal family that you would follow into any battle, through any world, past any planet. 
You groan, burying your face in between your knees. At some point in between the months Lillia first asked you about him and now, you’ve gone beyond just considering him as more than a friend. You’ve even got past having a measly crush on him.
You’re in love with Xavier, and it’s awful.
Breathing slowly, you gaze up at the night sky, where the fireworks have still not made their appearance. The wind teases the flowers around you, making them tilt a little to the left, which is oddly how you feel too. Not uprooted, but bent, just like a flower. 
With a blade of grass in between your fingers, you follow the direction the flowers are blowing in, only to find yourself staring at shining ceruleans.
“Xavier!” you gasp, eyes widening with a start. You move to stand as a reflex, but he raises a single hand, and you stop.
There isn’t a single bead of sweat on his face. He is breathing a little raggedly, and his uniform is stained with some sap he must’ve not been able to avoid from the bushes on the way over. His face—well, his face is pristine as always, there isn’t a moment when the prince of Philos looks anything less than dreamy. But it’s not his features you’re gazing at, but the concerned expression upon them, directed straight at you, with caring eyes and pinched brows.
You almost want to cry just at the thought you’ve worried him.
“Are you alright?” His voice is quiet, cautious, fragile. Like you may break if he’s too forceful in his questioning.
“Yes, fine,” you reply automatically, though you suppose you now have to make up a story for why on Philos you ran away like a child, especially because he sits next to you, knees raised in the same manner as yours.
“I was merely…overwhelmed, by the crowd.” The explanation sounds weak even as your tongue speaks it, but you cannot think of any other reason for your actions. At least this is easier than the truth. Anything is easier than the truth.
For a few seconds, there is silence, and as uncomfortable as this already is, you can’t bear it. So you turn to look at him, and you realize with burning cheeks you realize he is staring right back. You don’t even think he’s looked at the blossoming flowers even once; his head seems to be fixated in your direction.
“I know you constantly score better than me,” Xavier says softly, “but I am not foolish.”
With a hesitant hand, as though he’s asking for permission, he reaches up to once again adjust the flower crown on your head. Your heart falls, and you really should’ve known better to think Xavier could not read you like an open book, especially after a fortuneteller quite literally did read you like an open book.
“I know,” he continues, tucking a piece of your hair behind your ear, “that the people in our classes, the nobles, the folks in the marketplace, they all hold me in high regard.”
“Xavier,” you try to argue weakly, already feeling your heartbeat speed up from where this conversation is going. The thought of losing him, of losing your best friend, your prince, your everything, it is paralyzing. “Please don’t—”
“I know that my weapon of choice is a longsword.”
“Stop,” you whisper.
But he doesn’t, and he looks directly into your eyes with an open, honest sincerity written all over his face. Like this is his truth, even though it is yours. “And I know that you have known me all your life, and I feel that I have known you for even longer than that.”
Your lower lip trembles. Never once did you take him for the cruel type. There is no rule nor reasoning for this, to utterly expose your feelings even more and mock you for them, and if you sit here any longer you’re afraid you will begin to sob, and then not only will your friendship with Xavier be at risk, but your future position as well. The grandis knight cannot be weak. The grandis knight cannot shed tears for such silly matters as love. 
To preserve your role, to preserve your reputation and your dignity, you make to stand, to run even farther this time, but Xavier holds your wrist before you can, tugging you back to face him. There is no cruelty in his expression, in fact there is a tenderness as though he is somehow touched by your very clear devotion to him. 
His finger tilts your chin up, unwittingly making you demand a respect you don’t believe you deserve right now. His brow is pinched, as though he’s upset that you would let anyone, even him, turn you soft as a dandelion.
“I also know,” he breathes, “that this kingdom finds you incredibly lovely.” 
The world seems to stop.
“As…” Xavier’s hand rests itself on your cheek, and the most beautiful smile lights up his face as he murmurs, “Do I.” 
You lean in the same time he does, and faintly you hear fireworks erupt as you kiss the prince of Philos for the first time. 
The world is quiet, and so, so, so loud. Blood rushes to your face and to your ears, and you ignore it by placing both your hands on his cheeks, whimpering softly at how good he tastes. Every burning feeling and sensation you’ve felt in his presence these past few months, and really, your entire life, all seem to explode in this moment. The world is blue, and white, and Xavier.
His lips move so gently against yours, once again acting as though you are fragile, but it feels good this time, the idea of being something so precious as to require care for him. His thumb rubs soft circles into your cheek, you can barely pull away from him to assure him that he can be more forceful if he wishes, more wanting, more greedy. 
“Please,” he whispers against your lips, asking for what you aren’t sure, but you nod your head regardless, because you’d think you’d give him your very soul if he were to ask.
When you do pull back, he is looking at you so longingly it makes you more breathless than even dancing you did earlier. His gray-blonde hair nearly conceals his eyes, so you brush it from his face, breath hitching at his proximity. You’ve always known that he’s the apple of everyone’s eye, but you’ve never had the privilege to admire him so closely before.
“I don’t need a fortuneteller to tell me who my partner is.” Xavier rests his forehead on yours, eyes closing. “Whether it’s for sparring, or marriage, or anything else. You are the only one I want with me, through everything.”
You’re surprised you can even muster words when you shyly respond, “Likewise, my liege.”
His eyes shine, and the two of you finally look up to admire the fireworks bursting across the sky in incredible explosions of color. They pale in comparison to the eruption within you, but they are magical nonetheless, and you lean your head against his shoulder to watch.
A gentle kiss is placed on top of your head. “I know we only celebrate this once a year. It is a special time. Still…” He meets your gaze again, and the corners of his lips turn upwards. Tonight, there is only you and him now, you’re sure of it. “Would you mind terribly if we were to ignore the fireworks?”
Maybe one day you will learn to resist him. You sincerely doubt it, though.
“Not at all. But the seamstress and her kids will probably be back soon.” You place a begrudging hand on his chest, not wanting to stop him, but trying to act proper regardless. “Neville checks on the garden every night. He might see us.”
Xavier seems to consider this for a second. 
“Oh well,” he mumbles, leaning in to kiss you again, “what a shame.”
He doesn’t sound very sorry at all, and amidst the soft glow of moonlight, you surrender to him, lost in your very own little celebration of lights.
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a/n: if i had a nickel for everytime i’ve written a character x reader story where they’re at a party and they dance together but then leave to have a nice moment by themselves i’d have two nickels, which isn’t a lot but it’s weird that it happened twice, right?
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vagabond-umlaut · 1 year ago
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cauterize; cicatrize
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Wounds left by love are funny little things. Sometimes, they close by themselves. Sometimes, they close when singed by rejection. Other times, they heal when you scar once again, falling in love once again.
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▸ ryomen sukuna x fem!reader; reincarnation au; sukuna has been reawakened in the modern era but he does not have any vessel; reader was sukuna's wife in her previous life; FLUFF, ANGST & HUMOR; grumpy!sukuna; flirty!reader; SO MUCH OF PINING & UNRESOLVED TENSION BETWEEN THESE TWO, I SWEAR!!!; brief mentions of food
▸ belongs to the series 'mine? yes, mine.' but you can treat this as a stand-alone fic if you wanna! [note: each and every character is 18+ in this story :)]
▸ based on the ask sent by @yuujispinkhair for my milestone event. TYSM WINTER!! 🫶🫶🫶 i don't own the characters, image or divider used. please don't plagiarize or translate or repost this. enjoy reading! ❤️
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"It's so difficult to know when the gentle flame of love becomes the harsh flame of ruin– isn't it, baby?"
Furious eyes gleam back in the shitty ceiling lights of the restaurant, the very second the waitress who served you the food earlier, lifts an eyebrow in obvious interest before looking away when you shoot her a mirror image of her expression– A very irked call of your name pulls your gaze back to your husband—
No! No! No!!
Ex-husband.
Married to you, over one thousand years back.
No longer is he your terrifying darling husband.
Sukuna stabs his food with a tad too much force than what's needed, growling, "I may not be who I was before, but, don't forget your place, calling me whatever you want, you pathetic—"
"Did I ever tell you how much of a snack you look with your two arms, baby?" you cut him off, carving a small piece of the fish and placing it in your mouth. Your eyes shut momentarily from the rich taste before opening wide again, only to find confusion etched onto your husband companion's face. You continue, ""Cause you really do look so— very, very much similar to how you were in the Heian Era. A damn delicious snack. Or, a scrumptious five course meal— depending on how much you want to indulge silly me, I guess."
Silence greets your comment— the first time in the two hours it took you to convince Sukuna, then drive him to this Thai restaurant– good heavens above, his grumbling's still The Same even after he has been reawakened a millenium later– only to be broken by a too hushed ask within the next moment.
"And what do you think of my two eyes? Are they still as lovely as my four eyes were to you?"
Fondness tugs at your heartstrings, making you want to lean over the table and claim his lips in the neediest kiss ever seen in history— your brain quickly shoves such wishes away, making you return him a fond smile instead. And murmur, "Of course, they are...— Your two big eyes and the two not-really-eyes beneath them... As lovely as red rubies."
Sukuna's look shifts into one of joy, if only for a moment, before being back to scowling once more, the same way you return to your cheeky grin as you inquire, "And what do you think, hm, of the food here? It's just the best– ain't it? Yuuji, Nobara and I discovered this hidden gem on our last mission— and when I tasted the green curry they made– I realized I absolutely had to bring you here, by hook or by crook."
"And which one was it? By hook or by crook?" the curse questions, an extremely rare smirk peeking from the corners of his frown; you don't really grasp how much you missed this sight until now– especially, in the present days, when the only emotion your past lover [and forever beloved] shows you is frustration paired with weary distaste—
You shovel some rice into your mouth to stop the far too familiar train of thoughts– you know where it'll be ending; you know it won't be. An agonizingly slow minute passes, wherein you chew the food so slowly then swallow it down, then stare at your empty bowl of rice for a nice ten seconds before mustering a chuckle.
"Of course, by crook," you reply, ignoring the way Sukuna's gaze roves over your face, then your body dressed in your oldest pair of pajamas; staring not in lust, but with something eerily similar to worry, "No one would've ever allowed me to take you out in their right minds. It's way too risky is what it is. They might even execute me if they find us out."
A beat passes in quiet with you feeling the weight of your words and the implications your actions will bear, slowly sinking into the two of you— before the hush is broken yet again. By your companion again.
Though not with a muted question, but with noisy cackles– the most melodious music you've heard in a duration far too long to your liking.
Sukuna grins, pearly white teeth with those sharp canines on display. Barking a guffaw, he asks, "You're one weak fool, letting love ruin you – aren't you, pet?"
You outstretch a hand over to the other side, dainty fingers brushing away the few grains of rice stuck to his face, then smile– mind going back to the innumerable bloodbaths, the figure before you drenched the country in— them growing in intensity after the winter, you know was your last as the Queen of Curses– given, the dates written in the scrolls on his conquests are accurate... Somehow, you know they are—
Your smile widens, digging pleasantly painful indents in your cheeks, as you retract your hand, shrugging at the stock-still image of shock across.
"What can I say, baby? Learnt to do so, from my king himself."
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