#rhoam sucks okay?

[sunset-peril]

Updated Wolfbred Information

- From the Hateno Ancient Tech Lab's Records -

The Wolfbred

Source for Picture

Height: Between 4 ft 5in and 5ft 5in at maturity

Weight: Varies vastly by Wolfbred

Lifespan: At the peak of their "usefulness", a max of 35 years. In the era leading up to the Great Calamity, around 85 years with medical intervention, average lifespan remains at approximately 35-40 years (if they survive to adulthood)

Diet: Omnivorous, with a preference for meat

Discovered/Created by: Bred specifically for use by the Royal Family of Hyrule

Origin of Name/Discovery: Wolfbreds were named due to being bred out of a breeding program that used all known descendants of the Twilight Soldier (TP Link/Wolf Link), as they were Hylians who were bred to have a wolf-like temperament.

History:

In an effort to always protect the descendants of Hylia from evil, the Royal Family took all descendants from the strongest line of Heros (the Twilight Soldier's bloodline, grandson of the Hero of Time) and bred them against each other to create the most loyal, wolf-like force humanly possible. After the 1st Great Calamity, when the Sheikah were banished, they to were exiled to the same region (Necluda) into a forested region separated from the rest of Hyrule by a single fort: Fort Hateno. Locked behind the fort by force of death, the Wolfbred gene pool became smaller and smaller for 10,000 years, enough that stark resemblances can be seen between the soldiers of 10,000 years ago and the modern people of Hateno. King Rhoam's wife, Queen Zelda, revoked the exile and freed the Wolfbreds, gaining their affections for their entire lives (although most didn't leave Hateno, her new Wolfbred soldiers worshipped her). The Hero of the Wilds was the last documented male Wolfbred born, and he passed away during the 2nd Great Calamity and was said to be mated to the last princess of Hyrule, but no pups were reported from the pair. Supposedly, a "Wolfbred's Gauntlet" exists, but not much is known about it. It is said that Wolfbred are genetically incapable of committing treason.

Appearance and Personality:

They look like shabby Hylians, with more fur-like hair, stunted heights and ability to walk on all fours. They have wolf fangs in their mouth, faces/skulls that are longer than a normal Hylian but not as long as a wolf, and their thumbs are set far back on their wrists, halfway between a Hylian thumb and a wolf dewclaw. This trait is known as a Wolfbred's Wrist. A marking resembling the marking on the Twilight Soldier's fur also is present on the foreheads of the Wolfbred, suggesting they may carry genes for fur, but simply cannot fully express them fully. They also have complete motion in their ears, while Hylians can only twitch their ears. Contrary to popular belief, Wolfbred do not have fur or tails. They were originally bred to be 1000% devoted to the Queen of Hyrule and follow her orders with near blindness. Whatever a Wolfbred sets as their Queen (typically their wives for males, or their pups for females) will be what they serve until their last breath. Modern Wolfbred do appear to innately recognize female Hyrulean royalty.

Habitat:

After the Great Calamity of 10000 years past, during the Sheikah Fallout, Wolfbred were exiled to Hateno and Fort Hateno was built to contain them.

Language:

The majority of the species speaks a primal language of canine sounds and do not typically speak Hylian. It's unclear whether the primal language is instinctively understood or must be taught. It is called "Chuffing" in Hylian due to how it normally sounds. There is a Wolfbred call to arms that is said to rouse even Hylian soldiers to battle. Only traders and soldiers will typically learn Hylian.

Intelligence and Emotional Capacity:

In regards to intelligence and emotion, they are completely on par with all other races, however, they are the most violent and aggressive race due to being specifically bred for war. The tribe has their own rituals, folk songs/anthems and funeral rites.

Reproduction:

Wolfbred reproduce in the same way as Hylians, and take one mate for life. (Unlike Hylians, Wolfbred usually don't take another mate after the first's death) Due to the extremely small gene pool, prenatal and infant mortality (if not crossbreeding with Hylians or Gerudo) is extremely high and most Wolfbreds develop early-onset health problems.

Health:

Wolfbred were built for fortitude, and usually are extremely sickly or very healthy. Usually once the onset of health conditions begin, a Wolfbred usually would pass within 5-10 years. After the exile's end, even sickly Wolfbred can reach ages ranging from 60-80 with Hylian medical care. However, it is not uncommon for Wolfbred to simply drop dead. Due to the average knight retiring in their 30s, Wolfbred were never bred with the intention of living past their battle days, and their bodies begin to fall apart in the mid 20s. Joint and organ diseases typically associated with aging are most common.

(Purah's notes: the Shrine of Resurrection may erase or delay onset of any genetic defects Linky may have, making it possible for him to become the oldest biological Wolfbred in history)

Notable Lineage:

Twilight Soldier (Hero of Twilight) - A man in the Age of Myth said to have been cursed to a wolf's body. He was able to switch between wolf and man once the curse was lifted, but the magic had stained his genetics; making any and all of his descendants permanent wolf-Hylian hybrids

Rinkū - King Rauru's prized warhound. Said to be the only Wolfbred to sucessfully avenge his Queen's death

Kakku, Hero of the First Calamity - Suspected to be Wolfbred, due to a presence of Wolfbred traits in the Royal Family. Murdered by his daughter, Shamia.

Shamia, the Disgraced - Lone daughter of Kakku, caused the Wolfbred Exile and ensuing genocide. The only known Descendant of Hylia to be disinherited from the throne. (Also referred to as "the Paranoid Princess")

Karu the Unshakable - Eldest son of Kakku, the first King of Hyrule after Rauru, the first male to be heir in place of his sister. Also the only Wolfbred male who escaped the Exile.

Ordon Imperial - Most direct descendant of the Twilight Soldier, father of Link and Sydnei, late mate to Midna Marie. Died shortly after the Great Calamity. Cause of Death: Illness worsened by grief (Broken Heart Syndrome)

Midna Marie Imperial - Mother of Link, last King of Hyrule, and Sydnei, last Duchess of Hyrule. Said to be Hateno's most beautiful woman. Died sometime between Sydnei's birth and the Great Calamity. Cause of Death: Complete organ failure (dropped dead)

Link Hyrule (Linky <3) - The last documented male Wolfbred, and the last Wolfbred born under the exile. Champion of Hyrule, despite not technically being Hylian, and beloved of Princess Zelda. Died during during the Great Calamity, but not before becoming King of Hyrule. Cause of death: fatal battle wounds

Sydnei Imperial - The last full Wolfbred born, sister of Link. The leader of Hateno Village is her descendant

Zelda Hyrule - Not Wolfbred, but pregnant with Linky's only offspring. Said to be the only Hylian who can speak the Wolfbred tongue

Reede - Leader of Hateno Village and descendant of Sydnei (and Linky). Out of all currently living Wolfbred, he is the most in tune with his heritage and prides himself on keeping Hateno just the way it was during the exile: a safe haven for the Wolfbred

Clavia, Karin - Reede's wife and daughter

Ivee - Daughter of the family who runs East Wind General Store, supposedly named after Zelda's unborn daughter

Pruce, Amira and Azu - Family of Ivee, runs East Wind. Ancestor was a dear friend of Ordon

Aju - Ran Kochi Dye Shop when Linky was alive, ancestor of Sayge. Born with severe, but not fatal genetic defect

Sayge - Runs Kochi Dye Shop, oldest surviving Wolfbred with severe genetic defect

Sefaro - Son of Sayge. Appears to carry the same genetic defect as Sayge and Aju, meaning the defect is either present at birth or has an extremely early onset

Prima - Said to be the prettiest Wolfbred after Midna Marie. May be related to Linky (More research is required)

Dantz, Koyin - A family of Wolfbred who live outside the town on a farm in the forest, completely devoted to the ways of their ancestors

*All other citizens of Hateno either are not Wolfbred or more research is required. The lab is kinda broke*

New Species Template © Jezni ( @Jezni )

Wolfbred © Sunset-Peril

[novantinuum]

3, 7, 8, 17

Thank u Fwex uwu

_

~CHOOSE VIOLENCE ASK GAME~

3- screenshot or description of the worst take you’ve seen on tumblr

Okay so this isn't a tumblr thing, but I HAVE to describe this absolute chaos I saw on reddit once-

Basically there was this like... mega BotW Mipha stan who was super into Mipha/Link, and somehow by the end on one reddit thread I briefly glanced through ended up deciding to headcanon that Sidon was ,,, I GUESS??? Mipha and Link's secret love child which-

H-how... does that even work lmafo. I am scared. It just CAN'T work, because Sidon is like... toddler shaped by the time the Calamity in Breath of the Wild history happens. (And Zora age slower than Hylians anyways, so for all we know he'd been alive for like 10-15 years already.) It'd certainly make for... uh, a wild AU I guess, but it was definitely a convo that I was thinking This about as I scrolled past it:

7- what character did you begin to hate not because of canon but because how how the fandom acts about them?

So I don't think fandom has made me outright HATE a character, but there's definitely characters or ships that have been soured for me because of fandom tomfoolery. I think the notable ones here are...

-I kinda am like, really ambivalent about the Tenth Doctor (Also the recent Ten Take Three going on rn, who I refuse to call the Fourteenth Doctor lmafoooo) because of years of being sick of everyone being all "omggg the show just isn't as good now that Ten isn't there," and shitting on the Doctors who came after. Like, I used to LOVE him but now I'm just. Eugh. Whatever. It's almost as if I feel it's my duty to be absolutely neutral about him to balance out all the tumblr girlies screaming about how Tennant being back now is going to "save" the show or whatever.

-So very sorry, as I WANT to like it as a chronic multishipper, but Link/Sidon is a ship that has been utterly spoiled for me after all the drama that came from Sidon getting a canonical wife in Tears of the Kingdom. I simply do not want to be part of a shipping community that is that bitter when canon doesn't go their way- like, yeah we all want Nintendo to give some gd representation crumbs, but what else did you expect? Like after a certain point you really do just have to acknowledge that certain pairings are never going to happen bc of company bias and just enjoy your own headcanons for your own mental sanity. And the raging misogyny that came out of people about Yona was disgusting.

-Tragically, Fiddauthor (Stanford Pines/Fiddleford McGucket) was tremendously soured for me due to a loud fringe group of shippers who were very hostile to anyone who dared have headcanons about the two characters that weren't: they are both trans and gay. Like you dare to headcanon Stanford Pines as asexual and aromantic? You want a nonbinary Ford? You dare to headcanon Fiddleford as bisexual instead of gay? Death for you. Hate anons for you. It just got so suffocating that I had to basically drop the ship, which sucked because it was one I was SO passionate about back in the days.

8- common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about

Hmmm...

King Rhoam is not a good father, nor an abusive monster, but a much more tragic, nuanced third path right down the middle where he and Zelda were close once but he decided to sacrifice his relationship with her in order to campaign for what he believed was more important- the survival of Zelda and all of Hyrule through the activation of her sealing powers. Aka I believe he had to choose between being a good father and being a good king, and in an ironic turn failed at both at once bc he simply didn't have all the knowledge he needed to make the right choices. (His wife wasn't there to provide council to Zelda when it really mattered, and he literally had NO understanding of what she needed.)

To be fair I understand why many in fandom choose to vilify Rhoam in fic, as he does provide a notable moment of antagonism in the Breath of the Wild memories, and it is VERY easy to project one's own personal "bad parent" trauma on such a character while making fan content, but I am wholly of the opinion that making him a one note "shitty father with no redeeming qualities" is perhaps the most narratively boring option as far as canon interpretations go.

17- there should be more of this type of fic/art

Gen fic. This is my answer for every single fandom I've been in. There should always be more gen fic.

Also porn that involves tentacles. This is a wholly self-serving request. Yes, I AM in fact a rapidly swinging pendulum. I want either gen fic or HARDCORE PORN and there's zero in between.

[princehendir]

I really was like "yeah this fucking sucks but I do sympathize with Rhoam's position" right up until that final memory in Hyrule castle where it's like ohhhhhh okay so you're just humiliating her for no reason rn. Die.

idgaf if the world is ending it's very easy to not tell at your daughter in front of people

[inkytheyiga]

Give us Huni feeding Rhoam's fatass while he plays with his dick. If I do not get this stuffing kink shit, I will commit war crimes

Because you’re mean I’m changing the prompt a little so that Huni is the one being fed. Bitch. >:3

“To start, I want the four cheese stuffed Hylian mushrooms, the calamari, and oh- why not, how about your most expensive caviar? Then for my main course, I want the surf and turf with lobster and scallops. Oh and I want my steak cooked medium rare as well.” Huni smiled up at their waiter, who was struggling to jot everything down.

Rhoam had decided to take Huni out on a nice romantic date to a fancy restaurant, and boy was he regretting it.

After taking Rhoam’s order, which was a bit smaller than Huni’s the poor waiter left to go put them in.

Rhoam took a sip of his wine and sighed. “Must you really order all of that food?”

“Yes, yes I must, because I deserve it!” Huni responded as he shoved a piece of buttered bread into his mouth. “I’s ‘ot’ ‘ike ‘oo are a ‘all ‘ea’er”

“Do not speak with your mouthful. It is rude and disgusting.”

Huni rolled his eyes and swallowed the food before continuing. “You act like you never order big meals.”

“I order large amounts of food because I have a large appetite, and actually manage to finish my meals. Unlike you.”

“Oh whatever, you get to have my leftovers, so I really don’t see why you’re complaining.”

Before the conversation could escalate into what would inevitably be an argument, Rhoam took a deep breath to compose himself. “Alright.”

Huni saw that as Rhoam admitting defeat, and continued eating buttered bread. Who could say no to free bread?

The two sat in silence until the appetizers came out, and clearly each dish was bigger than Huni had assumed. “Oh…wow…that’s uh…”

“It’s what?” Rhoam raised an eyebrow.

“Nothing! Nothing…”

Not wanting to let the old man be right, Huni began to eat. By the time he was done with the stuffed mushrooms, he was already half full. Plus he still had the calamari and caviar to get through.

“What’s the matter, dear? Are you full already?” Rhoam asked with a shit eating grin that made him look oh so slappable.

“No! I am not!” The boy huffed, although it was clearly a lie.

He scooped some of the calamari onto his plate and took a bite. It was delicious. That’s how he somehow managed to eat all of it with relative ease. However, it left him much more full. Thankfully, he only had the caviar to get through at this point.

Finishing the caviar wasn’t too big a challenge either, thanks to the restaurant giving him quite a small portion. In any other scenario, Huni would’ve complained until the poor waiter cried, but for once, he was actually thankful.

With all the appetizers done, Huni pushed the empty plates off to the side and let out a loud sigh. He was stuffed. But he did it. He proved to Rhoam that he could actually eat all the food he ordered.

“I’m impressed,” Rhoam complimented. “Now let’s see if you can handle your main course.”

Huni was about to ask what that meant when suddenly a plate was set down in front of him. On it was the steak, lobster, and scallops he had ordered. Fuck. He had completely forgotten about the main course.

He visibly shrunk in his seat and stared at the food as if it were something Sooga had prepared. But it smelled incredible. It looked so good too. But he was already so full.

“Something wrong?” Rhoam asked after taking a bite of the prime rib he had ordered. He knew what was up. Of course he did. The bastard.

“I’m….I’m full…” Huni shamefully admitted. He shrunk down further in his seat and avoided making eye contact.

“No, no, I am not having any of that nonsense. You ordered this meal. Therefore you are going to eat it.”

“But I can’t-!”

“Nonsense. You most certainly can. And if I have to feed you myself, I will.”

Before Huni could argue, Rhoam got up and sat next to him. The brat had insisted upon getting a booth, as he said they were more comfortable. Rhoam was against it at the time, but he couldn’t deny that it made this more convenient.

“Listen, jackass, if I say I’m not gonna eat it, then I’m not gonna-MMMPHF!!”

Huni was cut off by Rhoam shoving two large fingers down his throat. Any normal person would’ve gagged, but this whore’s throat could handle it no problem.

“Listen to me you pathetic sow. You ordered this food. So you are going to eat it. If you continue to argue with me, you will be punished when we return to the castle. And I can promise you that it will not be a punishment you’ll enjoy. Do I make myself clear?”

Huni looked at Rhoam with pleading eyes, but to no avail. The man was dead serious.

Accepting his defeat, Huni nodded, and Rhoam removed his fingers from his mouth. They were covered in drool. Disgusting, he thought to himself, as he wiped them off with a napkin, before turning his head to look at the boy.

“How about you get started on those scallops you insisted on having while I cut your steak for you, since you’re just such a fussy little prince that cannot comprehend the idea of doing something for yourself.”

Huni muttered something under his breath, likely mocking Rhoam, before digging into his scallops. They tasted amazing, yet each bite made his stomach turn. He could barely even swallow at that point.

“Rhoam, please, I can’t keep eating- It’s too much!!” He cried after just barely getting down one scallop. He clung to Rhoam’s arm and buried his face in his shoulder. “Please…Please daddy….No more…”

Rhoam merely shoved him off as he continued cutting up the steak. It was a perfect medium rare, and in any other circumstance, Huni would be dying to eat it. But in that moment, he wanted to vomit at the thought.

By the time Rhoam was finally done cutting the steak, Huni had managed to force down the remaining three scallops. It wasn’t easy, but he did it.

His stomach was beyond bloated, surely stretching out the sleek, black, short romper. And of course it had a plunging neckline, which allowed Rhoam to shove his massive hand down the front, in order to feel just how full his little brat was.

“My, you seem like you’re ready to explode. It’s such a shame that you decided to wreck your petite little body by ordering more food than you can reasonably eat.” The king chuckled, slowly rubbing his hand in circles around Huni’s aching stomach.

“I know…Daddy…I’m sorry…”

“No, no, don’t give me any of that. You’re not sorry. You have done this far too many times. I’m not letting you off easy. Now,” Rhoam raised a fork to Huni’s lips, holding a piece of perfectly cooked steak. “Eat.”

Huni’s mind was screaming at him to start crying. To start throwing a fit. To start doing something that would make Rhoam stop. But he didn’t. Instead, he obeyed his command and ate the piece of steak. It should’ve tasted good, but in his painfully overstuffed condition, it made him want to lose everything he had already eaten. But Rhoam was relentless. Every time Huni swallowed a piece, the king had another already at his lips.

Huni was tempted to spit the food out and quickly hide it somewhere while Rhoam wasn’t looking, but he wasn’t able to, on the account of the older man not once looking away. He was staring. He had been the whole time, but Huni was just starting to realize. It made him uncomfortable. In a way, it made him feel exposed. Sure he usually loved having all eyes on him, but being stared at while in such a vulnerable state? He didn’t like it.

“Stop staring at me like that, you pervert…” He muttered as he slowly chewed a piece of steak, struggling to get it down.

Rhoam responded by grabbing him by the jaw and pulling him close, squeezing his cheeks. “Have you forgotten basic manners as well? You are not to speak with your mouth full. Now swallow.”

“B-But-“

“Did you hear ANY of what I just said, you pathetic swine??” Rhoam practically growled as he squeezed Huni’s cheeks harder.

The poor boy wanted to cry. His stomach was aching an unbearable amount, and having his face squished so much wasn’t very comfortable either. Yet all he could do was finally swallow the piece of steak and give a tiny nod of obedience, which finally allowed his jaw to be released.

Huni placed one hand on his neck while the other tried to soothe his aching jaw. His heart was beating at 100 miles per hour. Whether it was from fear or arousal, he had no clue. At least, not until Rhoam so rudely shoved his hand down between his thighs.

“Rh-MMMPH!!” He was muffled by another piece of steak being carelessly shoved into his mouth. Meanwhile, Rhoam began roughly palming at him through the thin shorts of his romper.

“Look at you… How pathetic. Getting wet in the middle of a restaurant whilst I forcibly feed you all this food you wanted to waste.” The grin on his face was so disgusting and made him look so slappable, yet Huni did nothing. “But I suppose I cannot judge you too harshly for getting excited, because I also quite enjoy watching you suffer like this.

Suddenly, Huni was pulled onto Rhoam’s lap, letting him feel the King’s sizable boner pressed against his ass. He’d usually jump at the chance to ride it, even in public, but with his stomach already full and bulging, he wanted nothing to do with it.

“Daddy please….” He whined, having clearly lost a great deal of energy.

“Finish your steak and then perhaps we will talk.”

With one more huff, Huni agreed.

It took longer than either of them truly wanted, yet slowly but surely, Huni managed to scarf down all the remaining steak until all that remained were the juices. Thank the goddesses that Rhoam didn’t make him lick them up. Still, even without doing so, Huni felt awful.

His stomach was horribly bloated, his entire body ached, and he was covered in chills. His stomach had the worst of it, though, as it could barely stay settled for even a minute. Every now and then, it would make a disgusting gurgling sound, which made Huni cringe. Rhoam had a much different reaction, though, as with each gurgle, his cock twitched.

“Rhoam…please….no more….”

———

“FUCK!!! DADDY!!! PLEASE!! PLEASE DON’T CUM INSIDE!!!” Huni cried out as he was pounded into the mattress.

Shortly after he finished his dinner, Rhoam had taken him back to the castle, without even eating his own. Fucking his gluttonous little squealing pig was much more important.

Huni had already cum once on the cock brutally fucking him, as his body was painfully sensitive after eating double what it could properly handle. Yet Rhoam was unrelenting. Until he finally came.

With a loud, deep grunt, the king finally came, putting an end to Huni’s suffering whilst still adding to it, as he spilled his royal seed into his ass, stuffing him even further, until he had nothing left to give.

Huni had definitely learned his lesson about being a glutton.

[silver-stargarden]

watched the cutscenes for age of calamity and oof

still hate king rhoam

[deiliamedlini]

WIP Wednesday

I have been mentally down and writing poorly for a few weeks now, and even my friend was like “oof, yeah don’t post this yet. It needs work” and thankfully has been stopping me from making rash decisions like randomly posting fics to AO3 on a whim.

The WIP below (even though it needs more editing) is the beginning of the new fic I’m going to post next. I’m finally back to the pirates too, which is making progress, but is just slow going because I’m making sure I’m not forgetting plots (which I already have so I am not rushing the chapter but it is in progress finally!).

It’s a Pre-Calamity AU with heavy emphasis on the AU. It’s basically Zelda being forced to train with Link for her safety. Antagonistic-but-not-enemies, to friends, to lovers trope. I want to call it Dance With Me because it’s not really about dancing (I like the other meanings of the phrase), but my friend says it sucks as a title and now I’m rethinking 😂 I’m doing so well! 

~~

When Princess Zelda was seventeen years old, she’d been fully prepared to die.

Ancient prophecies had foretold a Great Calamity that would sweep the land of Hyrule into a great blight and destroy it all unless those chosen by destiny could stop it.

Zelda had been one of those who’d been blessed by the Goddess’s alleged favor: Hylia’s spirit and magic coursed within her.

But the wielder of the Master Sword hadn’t been found in time.

Four champions stayed by the Divine Beasts: Urbosa, Revali, Daruk, and Mipha. And for a year, the five of them waited while King Rhoam of Hyrule went on a mad search for the Chosen Hero and for the location of the Master Sword itself.

Zelda had spent that time relentlessly pursuing the Goddess’ power; she passed out in the holy springs, prostrated herself before Goddess statues for hours at a time, devoted every waking second she had to prayer. But despite her greatest efforts, her attempts were fruitless.

But perhaps the Goddess were showing their favor after all, because despite every prophecy, despite every prediction, wall carving, and palm reading, the Calamity never came, and Zelda was spared a horrific death at the hands of darkness incarnate.

One year after the predicted date, the Champions felt like they could finally move away from the Beasts, ever watchful, but able to maintain some of their daily lives. Zelda stopped spending day and night in freezing water and instead moved to the Temple of Time where the weather was bearable, and the distance was well within reach of the Castle while still spending most of her time in holy grounds.

Two years after the predicted date, the Champions began to lead normal lives again, freely leaving their domains, though they were still ready to return at a moment’s notice. Zelda began to spend more time in the library, sifting through ancient tombs and personal diaries of past monarchs, hoping her answer lied in pages rather than prayer.

Three years after the predicted date, the Champions were harder to find on a day-to-day basis. But Zelda remained steadfast and relentless with her nose in books and her knees in the spring’s water. The Sheikah had to pull her out several times. They had to force her into recovery.

But by the fourth year, the Beasts had gathered dust, and Zelda had utterly given up, instead helping Purah and Robbie with their ancient tech and Guardian research, which—despite the lack of the Calamity—still had other practical applications.

It seemed that everything had been built up for no reason, that there was no Calamity after all.

So, it was only when they’d all gotten comfortable that the Yiga Clan, a cult devoted to the demon lord Ganon, began their relentless assault on Princess Zelda, heir to the Goddess’ devastating sealing powers.

The entirety of that year had been spent with Zelda running from attack after attack, losing her guards, losing Sheikah. She was sent back to the castle where Purah set up protective wards around her room that ran off ancient tech, and she continued working on them so they might be able to encompass the entire castle.

King Rhoam’s royal command had been that Zelda could not touch any Sheikah tech. She couldn’t look at Guardians, or ask about runes and wards. So, Zelda returned to her studies once more until her eyes burned from sitting over tombs in the candlelight.

She had to admit, she’d become proficient in her royal duties, following her father to almost everything she was permitted in. What she wasn’t, he’d fill her in on after.

At this point, a vast majority of Hyrule believed the peace was a sign that the Calamity was never going to arrive. The other school of thought, which Zelda subscribed to, was that the Calamity should be feared far more than ever, its unpredictability keeping the other half of the kingdom in a deeply rooted state of caution and suspense ever since.

Though Zelda had asked her father to let her leave the protection of the Castle more often for experiences outside of prayer, his answer was always the same: “I lost your mother to those cultists; I will not lose you as well.”

“I just want to swim in Lake Hylia,” she’d tried once. “The days have gotten unbearable. Please, father? I’ll take an entire company of guards with me.”

“I’m sorry, Zelda. No. You may go to a spring of your choice. The waters there will likely be a cool temperature. Perhaps try the Spring of Wisdom.”

Zelda was 21, though she felt as though one hundred years had passed. She was tired, bone weary with an exhaustion that had set in so deep, she spent a decent amount of her days simply sleeping. When she was awake, she stared at her hand, waiting for magic to miraculously hit her in the face. Perhaps if she stared long enough, the Goddess would take pity on her patheticness.

The days when she’d been sent out to pray were now her favorites. She’d found ways to coerce her guards into taking longer routes, stopping for longer breaks.

That’s what happened on the day her father had reached his breaking point regarding the attacks on her life.

She returned to the castle shaken and sore, but his tight arms held her as his body shook with relief. He sank to his knees and held her in his arms the way he’d done the day her mother died, and he realized he needed nothing more than to hold his child in his arms to remember that the world was still spinning as long as she was alive.

He’d told her that when he’d said goodnight to her, standing in the doorway of her room with poorly concealed heartache written all over his sagging body.

“I’m really fine,” Zelda said for the fourth time that hour. She sat on top of her long, blue satin sheets, sliding a bit as she tried to adjust her leg. Something about being curled into herself in some way helped make her feel comfortable as she smiled to ease her father’s mind.

“Okay. Well, I’m going to stop by in the morning, if that’s alright.”

“Sure,” she said, shrugging as if she were entirely unaffected by everything she’d been through. She was good at that façade after five years of stares and whispers.

“Okay. Goodnight. May the Goddess watch over you.”

That was how Zelda found herself in the library before the crack of dawn, perched on a ladder in the top shelves of the restricted section. She had access, of course, but she was reading an untranslated a Sheikah tomb from a former handmaiden of the Princess of Hyrule before her ascent to the throne. That Princess had practically bled power, and Zelda hoped her handmaid noted something of interest.

She tucked the book under her arm and climbed down, crossing the library that was filled with several lifetimes worth of books, and stopped in the government documents. Her eyes trailed the spines for a familiar one with territories clearly outlined. She went to the language section to grab a reference book for Ancient Sheikah. Though she was mostly fluent in that, among several other languages, the ancient variations on words occasionally tripped her up. So she set back up to her room with her pile of books, ready to be confined by her father for her safety once again.

Zelda nodded to several of the guards she passed as they stood at their post. Despite the castle being one of the safest places in Hyrule thanks to all the tech, guards were still positioned in the most well-traveled places on their patrols, while two guards stood at her door and her father’s.

Biting her lip, Zelda craned her neck around her pile to try to find the doorknob, fumbling her hand around blindly, just barely able to turn the handle. And because the Goddess never wanted to cooperate with her, she dropped two of the books, though she managed to cling to the relic with tight fingers. The other two fell right onto her guard’s foot.

“I’m so sorry!” Zelda muttered, bending to pick them up.

The guard was beside her, nearly banging heads with her as he grabbed the heavy translation tomb. Thankfully for her, he flinched away in time; he was wearing a helmet that covered most of his head, and she didn’t want to be on the receiving end of that metal. “Don’t apologize,” the guard said softly, picking up the other book for her. “Would you like me to…” He gestured vaguely to her room.

“Oh, no thank you. Just stack them on top of this one.” He did, and she took a step inside before backing up. “Actually, would you mind getting the antechamber door for me, please?”

He stepped inside and pushed the second door open before backing up respectfully.

“Thank you so much,” she said, about to use her foot to close the door when she looked back. “And again, I am sorry I dropped a heavy book on your foot.”

He bowed his head and stepped back out, so she closed the door and set her books down.

Her father came into her room early, as promised.

“Zelda,” he said with a strained greeting. The corner of his lip twitched, like his muscles had become tired under the strain of holding it up for so long, and his eyes held no joy, no spark. It was forced chipperness, and Zelda picked up on it immediately.  “May I sit?”

“Of course.”

She sat on a chest at the foot of her bed, and he pulled the chair away from the desk to face her. “Well, let’s not beat around the bush. There have been many attempts on your life, but I have felt none so potently as yesterday’s. When they told me you’d been attacked, all I could remember was the news of your mother. And then when you were brought in…” he ran a hand along a bruise on her cheek that she didn’t realize she had until she felt a flare of pain cause her to flinch. “You are my precious daughter, and I love you. I never want to see you harmed. That said, others do. It’s becoming impossible for you to safely leave the castle.”

Zelda braced herself. This was where he confined her to her room or to the palace grounds for the foreseeable future. She folded her hands over her lap so he couldn’t see the shaking grow more visible.

“You’ve been unable to protect yourself with your powers, so we must resort to other means. You’re to learn to defend yourself, starting immediately. We still need you at the springs, so I cannot command you to stay here. You still are a priestess of Hylia. So, given your setbacks, you’ll need to learn.”

Zelda’s mouth dropped open as she let the words process through her mind. “I’m sorry, what?”

“We’ll hopefully have a sword in your hand soon enough, but you’ll be able to defend yourself from these cultists.”

“A sword?”

“It’s too dangerous. We’ve lost too many guards. And you can’t fight as it is. This is the best option.”

“No!” she said, much louder than intended. “Fight the Yiga?” She shuddered just at the word.

“Zelda, we need you to live. Hyrule needs you to succeed, and to succeed, you must survive.”

Standing up didn’t make it any easier to breathe, as Zelda had hoped. “You think I haven’t tried?” Tears threatened her eyes as her voice cracked on her last word. As if years of her life sacrificed to unreturned devotion wasn’t enough for her. For him. For all of Hyrule. She’d tried, she’d bargained, she’d offered up her comfort, her breath, her mind, her years, her time. She was one person. What was left for her to do?

“Do you think I just stand there and watch my knights get murdered? Do I just drop to my knees and pray? Is that what you think I do?”

“Zelda…”

“No! You’re right, father. I’ll lead the Yiga right to the Goddess Spring that you need me to go to again just so I can brandish a sword and strike one down with my prowess! Because, Goddess knows that my Knights have an easy enough time with the Yiga, so it should be a cinch for me!” The sarcasm oozed from her in an unintentional venom drip.

“You’re telling me that I’ve failed! You’re telling me to give up and grab a stupid sword! Give me some armor next time I go to the Temple of Time! I don’t need my priestess garb. I have my sword! Because it will absolutely save me!”

“Zelda, please.”

“Please,” she scoffed, finally feeling a hot tear on her cheek. “You’re telling me I’m going to die! Five years ago, I was ready. I knew I’d failed, but I stood vigil waiting for the Calamity to give my life in the final hope that it might stop Ganon! But now, I was blessed with time, and still I can’t do it! I can’t access her powers. So you want me to fail one more time by using a sword to defend myself? This is the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard, and I was there when Lady Styla proposed that sham of a fashion show to lift spirits.”

“That’s irrelevant, Zelda.”

From the look on his face, she could tell he was not budging. She tried another tactic. “I-I shouldn’t be near a sword anyway! What if I stabbed myself by accident? Then there’s no way I’ll ever unlock mother’s power. I’ll be dead with or without the Yiga! I already dropped a book on my guard today! That could have been my foot with a knife! And before you tell me that there have been warrior queens and princesses throughout the history of Hyrule, that’s because they never met me. I’m not a fighter! I read books all day! I take notes. I can bore the Calamity to death with a detailed review of the territory lines in Northern Akkala! That might be more effective than a sword, at least.”

“Zelda, you’re not thinking of the big picture…”

“But if I don’t unlock the power because of some silly distraction like learning how to fight, then the world will fall to the Calamity. My time will now need to be spent in that wretched training area with all kinds of sweaty men. Do you want your precious daughter exposed to such a sight? Worse yet, what if I like it and decide to spend all my days there with… shirtless men!” She grimaced and blushed all at once.  

“This is the most absurd argument I’ve ever heard. You leave me no choice but to make that a command from your king rather than a request from your father. Because as much as I love you, I also am obligated to keep you safe.”

“Obligated?” her voice cracked again, losing some of her rambling thunder. “I’m an obligation? Is that how you see your daughter?”

She gasped when he let the silence answer for him.

“You start your training now. Your instructor has already been informed and will be ready for you.”

“Who?” she asked, glancing at the four guards at her door. Two hers, two her father’s. They were all hearing her shame. How long until everyone knew?

“He’s the most renowned swordsman in all of Hyrule, one of our best fighters, and he’s about your age, so he should be someone you can get along with.”

“The best fighter in all of Hyrule is only 22? No wonder the Yiga are everywhere, if those are our standards.”

“Be kind, Zelda.”

“Is that another order, My King?”

He sighed and crossed the room, stopping at her door. “One more thing. While you’re there, I’ve given him permission to overrule you if you command him not to train you. You will learn to stay safe, whether you want to or not. Now change and go. He’s expecting you now.” He turned his head to her guards. “Make sure she goes to the training yard, and if she refuses, come fetch me.”

As soon as he was gone, she slammed her door and sagged into the wood.

She did consider hiding out, but she knew her father would simply bring the soldier into her room to train if he had to. At this point, with the number of times the Yiga had come after her, she wouldn’t have really blamed her father if he’d locked her in a door-less room and dropped this instructor in through a hole in the ceiling until she learned to protect herself.  Truthfully, the idea itself—in theory—wasn’t the worst. Except for the fact that the Yiga were deadly warriors who trained to kill for most of their lives and slaughtered companies of trained Hylian knights.

Grabbing her most comfortable pants to train in, Zelda slowed as she remembered the event that had started this all.

The Great Tabanthan Bridge crossed the long expanse of the Tanagar Canyon, and she was always careful of the crossing. The fall alone would not only kill someone, but it’d likely flatten them clean out from a drop of that height. So, crossing it was not something that was taken lightly on a good day.

Being that far out there was entirely her fault to begin with.

She’d desired to visit the Temple to Hylia that was at the edge of the gorge, but she’d opted to lead everyone along the scenic route to enjoy some of her free time outside of the castle. The guards had protested briefly, but Zelda was adamant about a scenic detour.

What she hadn’t been able to predict or expect, no matter how much research she did, was that the Yiga were there, lying in wait for her and her guards.

She’d been bucked clean off her stubborn horse, and she’d been left on the great bridge as three Yiga ran for her. Though she’d gone to run, she was caught by one who appeared in front of her in a puff of smoke.

Trying to fight them off of her had been like the great struggle of praying for the Goddess’ powers: utterly futile, and a waste of time.  

Half of her attempts to shake them had been by holding the rope handle of the bridge and throwing herself precariously close so they’d have to follow.

The soldiers eventually reached her and fended the Yiga off, but they’d also recounted the entire incident to her father in horrific detail: how she was winded by the time she’d run halfway across the bridge, how she nearly fell off the great, how she couldn’t fight any of them off and had been overwhelmed, and how her weak strength had caused two large wounds in her palms from where she’d tried to push a blade away from her at one point.

Glancing down at her now-healed hands—thanks to the castle medics—Zelda pulled on her boots and tugged up the laces tight. She wasn’t weak. She just wasn’t… physically domineering. But put any puzzle, any riddle, any impossibility in front of her and she’d find the solution. That’s not weakness. That’s strength. She is strong… just not traditionally.

Her shirt was loose, and she tied up her hair before looking at herself in the mirror for a long time, finally noticing the bruise she’d sustained. She was going to hate this almost as much, if not more, than she hated horseback riding.

Resigned to her fate, Zelda trudged slowly toward the training yard, hoping to be late enough to at least remind everyone that she didn’t want to be there.

Glancing at the sun, she’d determined that she managed to be at least fifteen minutes late. Not bad. She could do worse next time.

The yard was empty of the usual hustle and bustle that went on, and she imagined that her father must have ordered it be kept clear for her private sessions. But it was also clear of an instructor.

She stood in the middle of the training yard and fisted her hands tightly as she looked around. No one. Her eyes narrowed at the empty space, searching for some sign of trickery. But the only others there were the two guards she had brought with her.

“Is this some sort of a joke?” Zelda asked, placing her hands on her hips. “Hello?”

There was no answer.

Shrugging happily to herself, she was ready to leave, but one look at her guards standing near the entrance reminded her of her father’s orders to fetch him if she didn’t go; either she stayed here long enough to prove that she made the attempt, or she’d be embarrassingly dragged back down by her father’s guards, humiliated as they would keep hold of her arms to ensure she followed them right back here. Her father would make sure she was here, no matter what.  

Crossing her arms, Zelda walked around. She rarely went to the training yards unless she was up in the parapets, so being down in the dirt and grass felt like she was in an entirely new world. One she didn’t belong in.

There were training dummies lined up against a wall and a worn dirt track in a wide circle around the outskirts of the otherwise square area. There was a bench. There were weapons on a rack.

And that was it.

She looked at the footprints etched in the dirt, kneeling down to read the story told by the shoe treads. There was a large step forward, and then several overlapping smaller ones as the wearer clearly stumbled back. Then a single skid mark as they were forced back. And then the imprint of a body where they’d fallen.

If Zelda were here under any other circumstances, she’d have smiled and tried to find all the stories in the dirt, but instead, she stood back up and sighed, craning her neck towards the barracks just past the archway. No one was outside, and no one was coming.

“Okay,” she muttered to herself, prepared to leave. But her eye caught on a weapon rack, and she glanced one more time at the barracks before heading to the largest spear. She held it, pretending she was one of her knights. Goddess, if a Yiga came at her, she’d die. Fear first, and then clumsiness, because who could control this glorified stick well enough to kill a Yiga?

She shuddered and put it back.

“You can get there eventually,” someone said.

She spun around to see one of her two guards walking towards her. He removed his helmet, shaking out his blonde hair. Zelda watched in confusion as he set the helmet down on a post and pulled a blue band off his wrist to tie his long hair back.

“But only if you’re not fifteen minutes late on purpose,” he said, not looking up at her. “Princess,” he added with a bow of his head.

Her mouth dropped slightly and her cheeks warmed at the light scolding. “I beg your pardon?” she asked, almost doubting if she’d heard him correctly.

She scoffed at his audacity, recognizing the bright blue eyes of the guard she’d dropped her book on. Did he think that a conversation with her this morning gave a guard the right to chastise her?

He held out his hand, and she instinctively handed the spear back, though in hindsight she wished that she’d hit him with it instead. She’d been too stunned. He returned it to it’s place, and walked across the entirety of the training yard without so much as looking at her.

Her feet tumbled after him as she mentally and physically struggled to keep up. What was happening? Why wasn’t he answering her? Why was he even talking to her? Who was this man?

“Hey!” she finally called. He stopped and turned.

That’s when he looked up for the first time, his downcast blue eyes lifting off the dirt and settling on her green ones.

Pride swelled in her when she saw them waver, because clearly her voice had rattled him in some way. He clearly didn’t like looking her in the eye either. His eyes kept darting off of hers, and he had to keep forcing them back. Her own eyes narrowed, trying to understand this guard. “Who are you?”

“Your instructor.” 

[redloftwingfeathers]

I feel like talking about the shit Zelda not only had to put up with but also what she subconsciously summoned herself and you're going to sit and listen and maybe cry with me okay? Okay.

While I don't think that was very cash-money of 'Hylia' to make Zelda wait until she's reached true, unrelenting despair to finally find her light, it made me wonder how everything came into play that made her journey so painstakingly hard, and not just Hylia pulling fast ones from the clouds. (Trust me I wanted to blame the goddess so bad after that moving performance at the spring of power but wait!! there's more!)

Things I'm looking at are specifically Zelda's anxieties of wanting to be a scholar but having to throw herself to the dogs of religion to keep Rhoam happy, the HEAVY depression she carries with not just from the loss of her mother but also just constantly being berated by her father and feeling like she's not good enough for Hylia, the jealousy and anger she harbors towards Link in their beginnings and how it effects her growth.

All of these are things (coming from someone who is very mentally ill) are ingredients that distract Zelda from her goals, intentional or not.

Zelda has a classic case of "I wanna do This Thing (studying, traveling) but I have to do That Thing (religion, strict orders) instead and now the fun is sucked out of it and my mind is buzzing and now I don't know what to do girl (hylia) HELP"

What's even worse is despite her hand-picked maturity, she KNOWS what is right and what she needs to do (her level of self awareness is impeccable sometimes) but she is still just a child in the end, wanting to live her life without dictation, which causes frustration and anger and can lead to self-doubts.

Starting with the loss of her mother, Rhoam claims that Zelda did not cry at all during the ceremony, and that it proved to him he could still be a strong king with how unwavering his daughter was. And although that's shown as an "awe inspiring" moment, it shows Rhoam does not understand how the processing of grief registers differently amongst people, especially children. She may have not showed it when she was, what, 6? (Not every normal 6 year old understands the fragility of mortality) but you can definitely see it affects her later on as Zelda grows older. It may not be entirely visible at first, but the way they portray it in HWAoC (I know its not entirely canon but bare with me on this) she longs for her mother's advice and comfort when her pleas and ideas fall deaf on the king's ears. Her mother seemed to be a very wise and compassionate queen, where Rhoam is a wise and a very bite-the-bullet king.

When stakes are high he trusts what he thinks needs to be done, and he enforces Zelda to finish her training Because she is part of his plan to push back the calamity. He knows protocol, and there's no room for creative thinking when the land of Hyrule is in danger. (Disclaimer: I hate Rhoam but I can also try to see what Nintendo was doing. He's not intentionally mean, he's an assertive dad that wants to see his daughter succeed (and also hella depressed) but he's really fucking bad at it and comes off as a dickhead. He is the embodiment of a boomer that does things the old fashioned way to get things done).

But all of this pressure he is putting on her, taking away things that make her happy so they don't distract her from her duty, shooting down her ideas because he wouldn't know how to even approach it from his standpoint, it really does a number on Zelda and really births her insecurities.

No matter how hard she prays and dedicates herself to Hylia, it doesn't work. Her mind is distracted, filled with fear and very little hope that the magic isn't Working. What even kicks me in the jaw more is that she's putting all of her effort into these prayers, and it's not even her wish she's making. It's Rhoam's wish. Her Ancestral Family's wish. That's why it hasn't sparked. She's praying on the behalf of her father and ancestors and not herself because she firmly believes there's other ways to settle the score. Zelda knows the importance of her role but its just not clicking when someone else is forcing you to do it. It just doesn't work like that.

Moving onto her liaison with Link, she is, well, in the beginning very irritated with him. Even a little bit after being chosen by Fi. But I don't think she MEANS to be angry at Link, he didn't do anything wrong in all honesty. She shouldn't take out her anger on him, but she's jealous, and he exists...so like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

When Link is suddenly chosen by the sword at a drop of a hat?? Yeah she's relieved, but there's also undertones of resentment. All of her Champions are here at the ready and she's still trying to figure out what shoe goes on first. She is the goddamn Princess of Hyrule, one who carries the blood of Hylia in her veins, and this random tiny knight who, mind you, fought tooth and nail to be her escort ends up finding his role before her? She is riding the struggle mule up Mount Lanayru (and I don't really blame her). And when she's exploring the shrines?? She makes it very clear to him she can work independently and does not need an escort, which although understood (freedom is a peace everyone strives for) she is careless regardless of her careful planning and efforts. She's a Princess, wandering Hyrule unarmed (and without her powers) with a horse as her only mode of transportation. You won't see yourself as a target even if they're pinned on your back, and with her determination to utilize these mysterious shrines as more Sheikah tech is being discovered is making her blind in remembering where she's placed in social status. It's dangerous, and I'm glad Link is there to see what she fails to see.

That's another thing too. As they progress and strengthen their friendship, Zelda sees Link as a mirror to question what her role really means. She uses him as guidance to help understand her situation, asking him "If you were told your whole life This is what you're meant to do, to take up your family's legacy...but one day realize this isn't what you want, would you still take the path you've been told to take?" In this case I think it's safe to say this is what Link knew he wanted. He loves being an aid to those in need, and becoming a knight despite following his father's path, this felt like his true calling. The spirit of the hero is VERY strong in his soul, and when he sees someone in need of help [Zelda] he's going to aid them whether they want it or not.

But Zelda still feels so lost, she feels so disconnected from her ancestors, as the previous daughters in the royal families were Given their powers at birth and meant to be awakened when the time has come. They were all given the gift of premonition, to be a medium for Hylia and a messenger of the gods, and overall able to keep Ganon away from the world no matter how many times he crawls back from the depths of hell. Being told your whole life you're meant to be like your ancestors, but not being able to fulfill any of those roles? It makes the past seem like one giant fairy tale when in you're in BotW Zelda's shoes.

No voices, no premonitions, no secret awakenings...Nothing.

At this moment, I finally understood why Urbosa said to Revali about Link. She said he is a constant reminder of Zelda's own failures. Link found his calling by following his instinct. Zelda has yet to figure out what she really wants, and is clouded by judgements not only from her father and people, but from herself too. With every passing day she is undergoing a meltdown, questioning if she is even meant to be apart of this whole plan anymore, probably something among the lines of "Was it meant to be someone else? I'm the only daughter, and yet I can't even do my one job." She lost everyone and everything, she's frightened, it feels like she's lost her faith in the gods, or even dare say, the gods lost faith in her.

But through absolute despair when Link just about gives his life for her protection, that's when it all clicked. She found her power and strength through Link, who was the one that, all this time, taught her about what she needed to do to awaken her powers without even directly telling her. Every conversation she had with him, she saw herself in Link. She saw all the effort he gave into becoming a royal knight, the unwavering determination in his eyes with every Lynel he slew, a never ending supply of optimism and hope no matter how high the stakes were. And yet he was also Free. He followed his path blindly, not even knowing where he'd end up, as long as he knew he was

able to protect those in need. And she wanted that.

He was her mirror, and Zelda managed to awaken herself when that mirror cracked.

Living the burden of being part of a prophecy and saying you're ready for anything, is very reckless. Understanding the heaviness that comes with sacrifice is not truly understood until it starts happening to you.

Zelda found her wish, her independence through Link. Her mind is finally clear and she understands what her role means in all of this.

She is meant to protect, to save, to understand more than just personal loss.

Zelda couldn't stand by idly anymore after everyone told her to do something else and let others handle the job. That was the last straw when Link stood in front of her, shield weak but at the ready when that guardian approached. She saw the desperation and said NO, which finally broke her seal. She chose to sacrifice herself, igniting her powers just as Hylia did for her people. She chose to save her last, literally dying hope, because Ganon cannot be fought alone.

He was the connection, the literal link, she needed to awaken her powers. And I just find that so fucking great.

Anyways thanks for coming to my TED talk I've been typing this for like 4 hours now

[wizardcommune]

aaaaaa i also love urbosa (i’m the previous anon that asked for her ehe) i am just a Little Lesbian who is starved for content... is it too much to ask for sfw alphabet with her? i really don’t think you write her out of character like you worry in the tags :>

urbosa sfw alphabet

a/n - THANK YOU!!! that means so much to hear fndbsngm 

also, i’m so sorry about the wait on this one!! my school’s trimester is ending early so i’ve been trying to raise my grades at mach twenty. i do have a break now though, so i’ll be able to write more frequently!!

pairing - urbosa x reader

warnings - none!!

a = affection (how affectionate are they? how do they show affection?)

urbosa prefers giving verbal affection, and receiving physical affection! she compliments you as often as possible

b = best friend (what would they be like as a best friend? how would the friendship start?)

as a best friend, she teases you a lot. she's like a big sister

but like. y’know. not in a weird way,,

c = cuddles (do they like to cuddle? how would they cuddle?)

she does! she’s not an extremely touchy person, but it would be comforting to hold you

her favorite positions are to lay on her back and put your head on her chest or shoulder, or spooning. no matter your height, She Will Always Be The Big Spoon

d = domestic (do they want to settle down? how are they at cooking and cleaning?)

urbosa would still want to lead gerudo town as chieftain, but she’d settle down more in terms of fighting. she wouldn’t want to risk herself as much considering you were there

honestly i feel like urbosa is just That Person who fucking sucks at cooking. she knows it too; she’ll just kind of stare blankly at you in pain if you suggest she cook

e = ending (if they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

f = fiance(e) (how do they feel about commitment? how quick would they want to get married?)

she would be fine with the idea of commitment! she would want to wait at least a few years before considering marriage. it’s a weighty decision and she doesn’t want to make the wrong choice since it could harm both of you

g = gentle (how gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

she’s very gentle with you! definitely not as much as someone like mipha, but she’s very careful not to accidentally hurt you

h = hugs (do they like hugs? how often do they do it? what are their hugs like?)

urbosa doesn’t hug you often, but she shows physical affection in other ways. i.e. gently pulling you to lean on her when sitting down, keeping a hand on the small of your back, running her hands through your hair (if she can), etc.

i = i love you (how fast do they say the L-word?)

probably a couple months at least? (i've never been in a relationship so is that normal????) 

she’ll say it on a calmer night, when the yiga clan is silent for once and king rhoam hasn’t called for her help. on rare days like these, she’s accustomed to drawing a bath that smells good as hell, so you’ll be really comfy and probably sleepy LMAO

will tell you right before you fall asleep when she’s thinks you aren’t awake!!! once she realizes you are, will 100% give u a forehead kiss 

j = jealousy (how jealous do they get? what do they do when they’re jealous?)

urbosa doesn’t get jealous very often, mainly pissed if someone won’t stop harassing you. she’ll wrap an arm around your waist, and if they aren’t already intimidated (they’d have to be drunk or just have The Audacity) she won’t hesitate to roast tf out of them. if you thought her teasing you was bad, it’s terrifying now. she won’t hold back

k = kisses (what are their kisses like? where do they like to kiss you? where do they like to be kissed?)

she honestly doesn’t have a preference on where to be kissed! she likes kissing you on the shoulder, forehead, and hand the most. :))

l = little ones (how are they around children?)

she’s actually really good with kids! even before she became chieftain, she liked hanging out + playing pretend with them

something really cool about urbosa that the kids like is that she treats them with high respect and talks to them like adults!!! (but very sensitive adults at that; she doesn’t tease them much. kids deserve kindness and you bet she’s gonna fulfill that)

m = morning (how are mornings spent with them?)

she prefers long hours of sleep + waking up late. so if it’s a chill day when you’re not needed for anything, she’ll stay with you in bed for hours

if she wasn’t able to sleep as much, she’ll be lowkey grumpy in the mornings until she gets her tea

n = night (how are nights spent with them?)

like the mornings, she drinks tea a lot before bed. she gives me jasmine or chamomile tea energy???? idk

long baths are a must, especially since it’s so sandy,,, everywhere,,,,

she’s the type to have a ton of candles and nice soaps and stuff, so she always smells really good before bed

o = open (when would they start revealing things about themselves? do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

pretty early in the relationship! she trusts you enough to talk about things that are bothering her/have in the past. 

although, i’m not sure if she’d talk about zelda’s mother and stuff like that due to privacy reasons. unless zelda herself didn’t express concern over it, she’d keep the details pretty tight

p = patience (how easily angered are they?)

unless you’re a yiga member, urbosa’s patience is very thick. i literally cannot think of a time she would get fully mad at you?? 

if you ever put yourself in danger, (especially for her) she would definitely scold you. never angry, though

q = quizzes (how much would they remember about you? do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

urbosa remembers things even you don’t remember. mainly things you point out at a marketplace or something. 

(on that note, she is absolutely the type to spoil you. you can mention a pretty flower in rito village in passing and she’ll be convincing revali to go get it for you within an hour)

r = remember (what is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

IM SORRY I COULDNT THINK OF ANYTHING FOR THIS ONE EITHER

s = security (how protective are they? how would they protect you? how would they like to be protected?)

very protective!! even if you can fight/are a champion, she’ll subconsciously be protecting you in battle. 

she doesn’t want you to worry about protecting her, honestly. (tbh she lowkey likes when you lean on her for safety)

t = try (how much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

she puts a lot of effort into them!! she actually finds it really fun to get to plan dates and stuff. she loves giving gifts and they are always very well thought out!!

u = ugly (what would be some bad habits of theirs?)

bold of you to assume urbosa isn’t perfect

v = vanity (how concerned are they with their looks?)

she does care about her looks, but only because it makes her feel good!! as long as she looks professional and clean, urbosa could care less about what other people think.

w = whole (would they feel incomplete without you?)

urbosa is comfortable enough with herself to be okay without a partner, but that doesn’t mean it wouldn’t hurt. if you ever were to get hurt/leave her, she would be crushed, but she would be able to heal.

x = xtra (a random headcanon for them.)

she hates the cold with a burning passion and anytime she has to go to the tundra, she’s grumpy the whole time

y = yuck (what are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

i couldn’t think of a partner one, but she’s scared of dogs for some reason. she is a cat person and they lowkey freak her out

z = zzz (what are some sleep habits of theirs?)

even though she has guards, being the chieftain means either of you could be put in danger at any time. because of this, she’s a fairly light sleeper. she’s also pretty protective in her sleep! she’ll pull you close to her and keep a hand on the back of your neck or stomach

[hyrule-kingdom-updates]

okay so like, i know rhoam cucking happened a while ago but i saw the incorrect quotes and was watching the sonic adventure 2 real time fandub and just... yknow.....

rhoam: i TOLD you, not to FUCK MY WIFE-

astor: and i did. whatcha gonna do, bitch?

urbosa: oh, hey rhoam. i saw that this guy over here fucked your wife that's pre- that sucks a lot dude. must be uh, pretty shaken up about that.

rhoam: how do you think i feel being cucked by a TWINK???

urbosa: well, it might upset you to know that i ALSO fucked your wife.

Astor 🤝 Urbosa 

Cucking Rhoam cause Fuck King Rhoam 

[needs-to-stop-looking-at-yigas]

Kohga and Pomma deciding to mess with Sooga by fucking right in front of him. Oh, and they make Sooga wear that chastity device again for good measure 🥰

yeah we can! let's go, and happy birthday!

"So we agree."

"ABSOLUTELY. He needs a little something special. But you know how he is."

"True, true. Which is why I should get my hooks into him first. You know he can't say no to me."

They both nodded. Pomma and Kohga may not have had much in common, but there was ONE thing that bonded them; their love for their precious Sooga. If only Sooga knew just how much they really did love him.

---------------------------------

"Sooga! You're back!"

Sooga had just gotten back from a meeting with King RhoamRhoam (for some reason King Rhoam felt so awkward around Kohga, but he’d never explain, oddly enough), and Kohga was apparently just SO giddy to see him back. Sooga chuckled, nodding as he let Kohga hold his face (even if he had to kneel down to his level to let him do so).

“I am, yes. He wanted to relay this message to you-”

“Yeah yeah yeah, not important right now. You need to follow me.”

“Did something happen?”

Oh that ever concerned look on his face, ever ready to spring into action, even when he JUST got home. Kohga tried not to chuckle, motioning with his head for him to follow.

“Just follow, big guy.”

Sooga did as he was told, absolutely ready to help Kohga with whatever it was that he needed. Kohga guided him to his room, and shut the door behind them. Sooga looked around, trying to spot an obvious problem, and found nothing.

“What is the problem?”

“You.”

Sooga seemed startled by the sudden statement. Which Kohga expected. He tried not to giggle at the startled look on his pretty face.

“M-me? What did I do? How did I disgrace you, my Master? Was I taking too long? Is it because I didn’t bring a gift with me? Is it because I left without making you food beforehand? What is it?”

Oh so worried, his poor dutiful Sooga. Sooga put his hands on his hips, shaking his head.

“You’ve been fucking Rhoam, haven’t you?”

Sooga did a double take, clearly not expecting that. It was a huge ass lie, but as far as Sooga knew, Kohga ACTUALLY thought this. He shook his head wildly.

“Master Kohga! I swear I haven’t! I’ve been NOTHING but professional with the King, I-”

Kohga held his hand up, silencing him, and shaking his head.

“You wanna know how I know, Sooga? I know because I had a little spy follow you to the castle, just to keep an eye on you. And he says he’s catching you putting stock in the royal treasury.”

“I’m...what?”

“You know what, that was a bad metaphor-point is you’re giving it to the king up the ass.”

Sooga wanted to speak, but Kohga wouldn’t let him. He folded his arms across his chest, pretending to be cross.

“Ah ah ah. You want me to forgive you for this, right?”

“I would beg until the end of time for you to forgive me.”

“Then apologize properly.”

Sooga had his forehead to the floor in a second, in a full Yiga apology.

“I’m sorry, with all I am.”

Kohga patted his head, as if he was satisfied. Sooga looked up at him, and Kohga sighed, as if he was mentally debating what to do with him.

“Tell you what. If you can go through one little punishment, I’ll forgive you.”

“Any trial you deem fit, I will take for you.”

“That’s what I thought you’d say. Up up.”

Kohga gave the command as if he was a pet, and Sooga obeyed, getting up on his feet with surprising speed. God this guy was fit and agile as they came. Kohga made him stay put as he dug into his closet, before bringing out a box. It was dusty, but somewhat familiar.

“What is-”

“Strip. Everything but the mask.”

Sooga obeyed without any further questions, stripping in record time. Kohga liked watching him undress. His fingers moved so fast, he put everything away properly and with clear organization-he was so efficient. He took a good look at his nude frame, honestly feeling bad he was putting him through this. But it was kinky, so it was okay. Kohga dusted the dirt off the box (it had been a LONG time since Sooga had been bad), and dug out his chastity belt. Sooga tried not to step back, clearly having flashbacks to the torture that was NOT getting an erection.

“M-master Kohga please-”

“Stay. Still.”

Sooga clearly didn’t want to, but he did just that. He let Kohga strap the chastity belt onto him, nice and snug. Kohga patted it for good measure, and pointed to the chair right by their bed (sometimes one of them wanted to be on the bed, the other wanted the chair. Yeah, gross couple shit). Sooga sat on the chair, bracing himself to be touched. Only, he received nothing as Kohga just sat on the bed, grinning up at him. Sooga was about to ask what was happening, before there was a knock at the door.

“Pomma! Just in time, come on in!”

Sooga went to cover himself upon the door opening, when Kohga barked at him to not do so. Sooga sat there, caged, nude, and shameful. Pomma gave him a small wave as she sat down on the bed.

“I take it someone has already started their punishment.”

“Yep! You ready?”

“He looks so sad, Kohga. Can’t I just give him one kiss?”

“Ugh. Fine, ONE kiss, but that’s it, this is a punishment, not a reward.”

Pomma giddily got in front of Sooga, tilted his mask up a bit, and pecked his lips.

“Good luck, Soogy.”

Sooga was about to ask just what was happening, when Pomma joined a suddenly nude Kohga on the bed, starting to strip herself free of clothes. Sooga gripped onto the arm rests, trying to figure out just what to do with himself here. Kohga put his hand on Pomma’s thigh, lightly massaging her flesh.

“Now, you’re gonna sit there, and just watch. No touching, and no talking until we talk to you first. Got it?”

Sooga nodded, being mindful to stay silent and watchful.Pomma lightly clapped her hands, clearly eager to put on a show for her Sooga. Even though it was a punishment, he deserved to have a bit of a show. Sooga palmed and played with Kohga’s cock, taking note to how envious Sooga looked. It was precious, how much he wanted to touch them. Kohga kept talking as he felt himself get hard in her hand.

“You’re doing good so far. Not a single word out of your mouth, like a good boy. Pomma, he’s a good boy right?”

“So far. But then again, we did just start. There’s plenty of chances for him to mess up, like say, from seeing me do this.”

She knelt down to kiss at his semi hard cock. Carefully, softly. Delicate enough for Kohga to grumble bitterly. He hated shit soft and sweet.

“Pomma it’s HIS punishment, not m-”

Then she finally indulged him. She groaned as she took him fully into her mouth, groaning as drool cascaded down his girth. One hand held his cock, the other played with one of her tits, putting on quite the show for a rather uncomfortable looking Sooga. He wanted to move, wanted to speak, wanted to get hard. But they wouldn’t let him. Kohga ran his hands through her hair as she sucked him off, and he swore he heard a whimper from their poor Sooga. He liked his hair being played with too, and him not getting it was clearly not something he was enjoying. Kohga snickered, making the show of running his fingers through her cream colored hair.

“Aw, you want your hair played with too, huh Sooga? Well, that sucks, because you’ve been bad. POMMA has been good, so this is what she gets. She gets a mouth full of cock, and her pretty hair played with. And you know what? Just because Pomma has been so good, she gets an extra prize. Pomma, back.”

Pomma pulled away, making the mess of drool pretty obvious on his cock, before laying on her back, and spreading her legs open, presenting herself. Kohga carefully rubbed her upper thigh, before letting his hand down to her bare, hairy pussy. Kohga didn’t like women, but damn did he know how to treat someone as pretty as Pomma. He softly petted her puffy outside, getting her used to his touch.

“See how well she gets treated? Because she isn’t going around fucking dilfs? Especially not without MY permission. Someone forgot just how to behave. And now, he doesn’t get to get hard, does he?”

Sooga watched his fingers as they palmed at her. He wanted that. He knew how soft his hands were. He knew how soft SHE was. He swallowed, forcing his dry mouth to speak.

“That’s...right, Master Kohga.”

“Say it.”

Sooga knew just what exactly he wanted. He swallowed what felt like dust, before he forced himself to do just that.

“I don’t get to get hard. Because I haven’t been...behaving.”

“Exactly. Now SHE gets to cum, and you can’t.”

Kohga helped himself, and started to finger her wet pussy. Sooga watched her squirm and moan under his hands, clearly trying to stand still for him. To say Kohga was the best at fingering was NO exaggeration. So nimble, so smooth, it made Pomma shake and drip in mere moments. All while Kohga sat there, stroking himself, and looking at Sooga.

“See how much fun she’s having? See how she’s dripping all over the bed? See how she gets EVERYTHING, and you get nothing?"

"I didn't m-mean to-"

"I didn't ask you a fucking question."

Sooga watched in jealousy as Kohga’s three fingers stuffed her, right to the knuckle. Sooga knew first hand, how good his Master was at fingering, and this was absolute torture. His cock kept trying to get hard, only for it to be painfully stopped. Sooga tried to wedge his fingers in there before, but there was nothing. No relief in sight. Kohga sighed, as if he was terribly displeased (though Pomma sure as hell wasn’t).

"You haven't been this bad in such a long, long time, Sooga. You bad boy, ESPECIALLY thinking I wouldn't catch you. Pomma, eyes up here, hun."

Pomma tried (and struggled) to look up past her chest, right at Sooga. Her face was flushed, but oh so satisfied. He WISHED he was her right now. Getting fingered as quickly and as roughly as she was right now. Her thick mane of hair getting soaked in all of those wet, slick juices. He wanted anything and everything, but he couldn’t.

"Oh, poor Sooga. Being the only one who can't cum. That sucks. Maybe you shouldn't have whored out. I mean RHOAM of all people. Granted A+ on that girth, but come on."

Sooga was about to ask just how he knew his girth, but given the fact that Kohga had nestled his fingers keep inside of her, finally making her cry out as she came...well, it didn't feel important. Kohga was ruthless to her as well, snapping his soiled fingers.

"No time for rest, either of you. On your back, look at him."

Pomma obeyed, shakily getting up as she laid down, head hanging off the bed to look at Sooga. She stuck her tongue out at him, just in time for Kohga to cum, right over all over her tits. The agony of not being able to cum was more than words could say. Watching his thick cum trickle down her smooth skin- he wanted to help her and lick it off for her. Kohga finished on her, sighing, as if he wasn’t happy.

"And now, I'm going to blow her right up her ass. And you're gonna sit there, aren't you? Wishing you had this? Go on. Say it."

"....i….i want to fuck Pomma's ass."

"Ah but ya can't. Because you decided that THE KING was more important. All fours, Pomma, and stick your tongue out more, you know he likes it."

Sooga whined, squirming in his seat. This was all SO terribly hard, in a way.

[songbirdstargazer]

Resume Chapter 7, Zora’s Domain

I’m so sorry, I know this is incredibly late. I ended up reading through it right before I was about to post it, and ended up scrapping half of it. I just couldn’t get the feel I wanted (and I suck at writing Mipha) and I’m still not sure if I’m entirely happy, but it’s better. Well, I hope you enjoy this chapter!

oO0Oo

Zelda shifted in her saddle, gazing up the path by the river. They were headed to Zora’s Domain, then Goron City and Rito Village, ending on Gerudo Town. They had made time to stop in Hateno and Kakariko if her father didn’t call her back first. 

A call from the river startled Zelda, and she looked frantically for who it could have been. As her eyes found Mipha, however, she calmed, sheepishly smiling. “Hello, I was informed you were on your way, so I thought I’d meet you two here.” She said, hopping out of the river and nodding to the pair of Hylians. 

Zelda nodded, a small smile spreading across her face. “Thank you, that was very kind of you. We actually came to see if you were okay, so it’s good to see you now.”

Mipha smiled softly, nodding. “I’m quite alright, as well as everyone else in the domain. Once we get back to Zora’s Domain, I can give you a full report for the King, if it’s alright with you.”

Zelda agreed, and she, Link, and Mipha continued the walk to Zora’s Domain.

oO0Oo

As soon as the horses were boarded, the Hylians met up with King Dorephan in the throne room. Staring up at his imposing figure and starting to wilting under the harsh gazes of the Zora advisors, Zelda steeled herself. 

Taking a deep breath and bowing her head, she began. 

“King Dorephan, on behalf of my father, King Rhoam Bosphoramus Hyrule, I, Princess Zelda, hold out the hand of the Hylian people to help in all repairs done to your home. If not for your daughter's bravery, we may not be here. We wish to extend our thanks and assistance to you.” 

Zelda looked up to King Dorephan again as she finished her speech. King Dorephan stared her down for a moment, then averted his gaze as he opened his mouth to speak.

“Princess Zelda, the Zora thank you and your people for your gracious offer, but we have to decline. Zora’s Domain was spared too much damage, and we are perfectly capable of repairing the rest. As for my daughter’s help, I would like you to tell the king that Zora’s Domain will not help fight your battles any more. My daughter almost died that day, and I would like to avoid that again. Now, unless you have anything else to say, my daughter can show you to your rooms, where you can rest for the night, and then leave.”

Mipha’s eyes widened and she rushed over to her father. “What do you mean, father? I’m perfectly fine, all thanks to the Hylians! Why are we taking away our offers to help?”

Dorephan looked down at his daughter. “Not now, Mipha. We will talk later. Show our guests to their rooms.”

Mipha opened her mouth to protest, but Zelda interrupted. “It’s alright, Mipha. We pulled you into a battle you weren’t obligated to fight.” She turned to Dorephan. “We thank you for your help and the hospitality. I’m very sorry for everything that has happened.”

With that, Zelda turned, gesturing for Link to stand, and trailed after Mipha.

oO0Oo

The next morning, Zelda awoke sluggishly to Link gently calling to her. “Princess, wake up. I’m sorry to get you up so early, but we need to leave.”

Zelda sat up slowly, blinking the sleep out of her eyes. She turned to see Link kneeling by her bed, fully dressed and equipped. Confused, she asked Link what was going on. “We’ve overstayed our welcome, princess. The royal advisor, Muzu, asked me to get you up and ready to leave.”

Her face dropped. Oh. Right. The king had asked them to leave immediately… She swung her legs out of the bed silently, standing and stretching. Turning to Link, she saw him walking toward the door. “I’ll be preparing the horses. I’ll meet you there?” Zelda nodded. “Thank you, Link. I’ll be there in a minute.” Link nodded and left. Zelda sighed, and started dressing.

oO0Oo

After saying goodbye to Mipha, Link and Zelda mounted their horses and made their way out of Lanayru and to Eldin. Zelda remained silent throughout the ride to Foothill Stable, only saying the bare minimum. Link didn’t dare say a word, but did peer worriedly at her. She pointedly ignored his pleading stares, keeping her green eyes firmly ahead. 

He decided not to think about how much it reminded him of those first few months.

The ride was uneventful, if you didn’t count the goat that broke out of it’s pen at the stable and ran in front of Zelda’s horse, breaking her silence with a surprised cry. Link chuckled, but slowly quieted when he saw the princess’s lack of reaction. He pursed his lips.

He really needed to fix this. 

Once they arrived at the stable and boarded the horses, Link made dinner (and dessert consisting of fruitcake; which seemed to slightly brighten the princess’s mood) and Zelda headed off to bed early. Climbing into the hard bed next to hers, the knight’s eyes never left her silent form as he drifted off to sleep.

He vowed to keep her safe until his dying breath, and he would do just that. 

[wildshero]

ooc: okay last aoc post, spoilers under the cut, until friday

so here is why i am not a fan of the game story wise... the game despite some people’s claims was promoted as a prequel to breath of the wild. nintendo said that the game was supposed to show us life before calamity ganon and how it affected hyrule. that is not what the game gave us.

in my initial post i was like the story is about zelda, and it is, rightfully so, however the game is also not called “legend of zelda: age of calamity” it is called “hyrule warriors: age of calamity” and quite honestly i felt link’s sidelining to be a bit much for me. i love link he is my favorite, i do tend to find botw zelda a bit OP with her “sealing power” and that doesn’t change here. calling the master sword “the sword that seals the darkness” is utterly pointless when link slices calamity ganon in half to weaken him for zelda to seal him. link not stabbing ganon with the sword to aid in the sealing frustrates me. they say his sword is the key, and in that sense zelda’s power is the lock but that is not what we see unfold.

story wise there is alot of plot armor quite literally for Rhoam. The time travel messes up quite alot. And while I like seer aka “not ganon” character he could have been done better, instead of just utilized as something for ganon to suck up to be able to take on a humanesque form (which was better than what we got in botw).

which brings me to the egg. the egg literally takes over link’s role. it does give you a slight connection to zelda’s mother, but most of what zelda does in BOTW with link is done with the egg instead. like the egg dying is what spurs her on at the end of the game and i think that is a huge cop out.

With writing link out, i meant it. This game would have been the exact same if link wasn’t there. every moment from BOTW that is similar in this game is literally replaced with zelda taking comfort in a character other than link because of how the game play style works. zelda and link are literally never alone. zelda finds more comfort in the fucking egg, purah, and impa than link which makes her powers awakening such a horrible scene.

Let me explain. In BOTW Zelda’s powers awaken after Link is barely able to stand in front of a guardian. He has taken multiple shots, and literally dies, and her power awakens for him. In this game Link is at full health taking on the four blights as zelda runs with impa but she stops because she wasn’t able to stop to “save” her father so she will for link. Its a moment that loses all its power, EVEN MORE SO when we learn that her father isn’t fucking dead he had literal plot armor to save him. which just makes her powers awakening for link lose even more of their potency.

don’t even get me started on the master sword business. that will be addressed in my revises master sword headcanon. its utter nonsense. not to mention the game gives link these “courage powers” a-la zelda’s sealing powers BUT THEN DOESN’T DO ANYTHING WITH THEM because the game doesn’t need link in it to be a game. Like there is one scene where link straight up isn’t in the cut scene, he straight up disappears that is how unimportant he is.

there were a few things i liked, but for the most part as a story i didn’t like it. it was very bad writing, when i do create my verse for AOC I will be making adjustments. cause that is the only way i see myself working within the confines of the game. and heads up the egg wont be there.

[575pfe]

Okay. So here is my lame ass idea. If it gets enough support I will make a webcomic about it. But only if like... at least two people are as excited about it as me. Because I’m tired of shouting into the internet void.

Prince!Zelda is assigned Link, “the strongest most highly decorated knight in the kingdom”, as his personal bodyguard by Queen Rhoam. When Link walks in the prince is like “... that’s it? He’s kind of small.”

Of course Link doesn’t speak but is visibly annoyed (thinking of putting Navi in there? And Navi is the only one he talks to. But you never know what the dialogue is, she just reacts to him)

Then the prince gets himself involved in some dangerous shit and can’t fend for himself. Link uses that all mighty sword of his to save the day and the prince is of course like, “oh ohhh” .... “shit my dick is hard.”

And now he has to suck up to this cute mute knight who he completely underestimated, but the knight is bitter and won’t give him the time of day.

??? Comment, like, reblog ??? Tell me what you think ??? Give me that sweet, sweet validation

[mavda]

Her name

Ch.1 |

Ch.2: The things we do

When the fight left Link's body, when his throat became too sore to keep on screaming, when his abdomen felt tight and shone bright red on its side, when Link could feel each heavy breath he was taking and the pain of still being made him gasp for air. When Link could only think this had to be a punishment. A woman came into his room.

She was blonde and her eyes were pained, her mouth was pressed in a thin line and her steps were short. And she came to Link, "You just need to sleep, okay? You are going to be all right." Her hands moved with practiced easiness. She touched Link's forehead, pressed his body with a deep frown on her face, and eyed Link's stomach wound with worry.

Link couldn't feel anything but the heat inside him, the discomfort accompanying every movement, every breath. He felt tears pooling in his eyes in frustration. His mind was fuzzy and his eyes unfocused.

The woman tried to give a reassuring smile, brought a glass up to Link's face, "Drink this and you'll feel better."

Link wondered whether more screams would help him get his point across, but as his mind was now filled with denial over this situation, he only eyed the glass the woman was offering.

"Please try to rest, you have to rest-" the woman tried.

But even blinking made Link want to whine like a child, so he moved his head away from the glass, away from the woman, "Please, just let me-" it was hard to voice it, such dreams. It felt wrong, it felt like betrayal, and his mouth was too dry to make it easier, "-just let me die."

"I'm sorry," the woman said, "but I won't let you." She touched his face, lifted his chin, "Drink this." But Link kept his mouth shut.

Link could feel the woman trembling, but his own pain blinded him, "Please," he begged, her hand was out of his face in an instant. Link would have argued his case if he could have, but the only thing that circled his mind was how much pain he was in and how unfair this whole situation was, so he persisted, "I'm tired."

But the woman looked at him with her jaw clenched, her eyes were red out of exhaustion, and the fear of watching a dying man clutched at her heart. "No," she let out.

And Link had no strenght left to do anything else but groan and turn on his bed.

Link awoke with a sting that made him flinch. The woman next to him squeaked and drew back her hands.

The pain, again, rose slowly within Link, marching from his feet upwards. Link's face was taut and his jaw clenched, a scream nested in his throat but it was too dry to make a sound. The woman stood and filled a glass with water, when she came back her face was the first thing to appear. Blue eyes, pale skin, blond hair. Link frowned, trying to remember where he had seen her. There was something about her... about her face... about her stance...

And when she locked eyes with Link, Link's heart leapt once. Scared, terrified, there was a push on his heart that made him want to kneel and gasp for air. Realization hit him with a desperation he had thought lost to him. A breath, "Hylia."

And the woman opened her eyes with shock. Her lips thinned, her eyes wavered, "Here, your water."

But Link shook his head, "No."

When two nights after Link woke up with a coughing fit that made him groan and double over, when he didn't even need to call for Hylia's help for she had arrived the moment after and had soothed him with her hands on his back and shushed whispers, when Link hadn't even thanked her before she left, when he couldn't fall asleep right after. He realized. He had been too harsh, too brash.

When two nights after the same happened, and in between coughs Link heard the pitapat of her feet hitting the floor and felt his ever-growing debt to her sneering from behind him, when Hylia gave a short nod in approval after Link's coughing had subdued, he caught her before she left. The candle she had brought shone directly on her face and her surprise let Link know that she was listening. Link felt a lump on his mouth, and wondered whether crying at Hylia's lap would make him feel better, before she left though, he apologized, "I'm sorry about before, I was too harsh, I should've-" Hylia didn't let him finish, her smile had been true, Link was sure, but her face was tight and her eyes were bright. Hylia had squeezed his hand and left without taking the candle. Link had been left that night looking at the ceiling, pondering about... them.

She was Hylia and he was Link, she was a Goddess and he was a hylian, named after her very providence. And she was here. Taking care of him.

It felt oddly familiar, like a muddled memory one wasn't sure it had happened. As if he could summon Grandpa Orca, Grandma Aryll and Rhoam to appear the next moment at the end of his bed. It felt calm, warm, soothing, in the same way a dream would. But this, this was real. And the pain Link still had to face was an attestment to it.

This was no dream. This was no death. This was...

Hylia wouldn't stay to talk, she would come and check on Link, change bandages, clean, and then leave. Any attempt at talking would receive as an answer a smile and a nod. Hylia would no longer wear the glistening jewels Link remembered on her head and ears, Hylia would no longer wear the vaporous dress he had seen before. Now Hylia wore a dress that looked like it had been made by clumsy hands, gave Link thin smiles and curt nods that somehow made her look vulnerable, and her hands-

Her hands were warm and rough and nothing like the shining warmth that had held Link's dying body. Hylia had never looked so... normal, and Link had never felt so...

The only reason Link could swear this was in fact Goddess Hylia - and not a walking peasant that had taken pity on him - was the last memory he remembered after defeating Demise. Hylia's face had been right over him, painted in anguish, and her mouth had kept on whispering sweet nothings to Link, in what he had thought an attempt to ease him into death. He had seen her face inches away from his own and he had comitted it to memory. This woman who lived with him was Hylia, the Goddess, his Goddess, his savior.

And Link couldn't find one reason why she had done what she did.

For Link, there was no other way around this predicament. Hylia had saved him, out of countless Protectors who had lost their lives. Him. There had to be a reason. She had something to ask of him and Link would answer to her aspirations.

His prior outbursts had been the result of him being overcome with grief and pain and suicidal wishes he didn't want to linger on. He was recovering his strenght and his state of mind. His head still pounded, his wounds still hurt, but it wasn't the blinding pain of before.

This, this he could manage.

To ask Hylia directly why he had been saved was out of the question. Link would crumble under the weight of heavy responsibility and feel burdened under any other answer she could provide, so he only surfed through mundane talk.

Hylia frowned whenever Link asked a question but answered with the quiet voice he had come to love all those years ago.

Link was sitting when Hylia came into his room. Link had started to understand her schedules, her activities. Now was the time to check on his wound. "Hylia," Link greeted.

Hylia nodded and walked to him. Link had been pondering on whether he should wait to recover fully before asking about the outside world, but the view outside his window only made him eager to know.

Hylia touched his body with soft touches and cleaned the wound with a mixture of herbs Link could barely name. When she finished tightening the bandages, Hylia put a hand on his forearm and smiled, "You're healing really well."

Link gave her a look, "Hylia." It wouldn't deter him from doing what he had already promised himself, "Hylia, what about the triforce? The islands?"

Hylia's eyes widened, and she took back her hand to her lap. And she smiled. "The triforce is safe, the islands are settled already and the people up there are thriving." Link nodded, and Hylia crushed her skirt with her hands, "And it's all thanks to you."

Link felt like he should smile, but the only sound that came out was a snort. He shook his head and settled by looking out the window. Hylia left and closed the door behind her with care, and Link had to fight tears back.

Link was walking through the house. A hand pressed on his side and a limp that made him lean on the walls. Hylia walked around him, gave him a curt smile that betrayed joy, and Link had to bite down the glee he felt. He sucked at walking, but he persevered.

The sooner he healed, the sooner he could help Hylia, let her go back to the Goddesses' realm.

As soon as he healed... but the way his legs trembled made him huff in exhaustion and made him feel unsteady on his feet. He had only walked from his room to the hallway that linked his bedroom with Hylia's and the living room, but his breathing was labored and he was feeling dizzy.

Hylia saw him from afar, trying his best to put one feet in front of the other, and having trouble with it. When Link pressed a hand to the wall on his right, and closed his eyes to breath in and stop feeling the floor give way under him, Link heard Hylia walking to him. When Link opened his eyes he saw a chair near him and no trace of Hylia. Link fell with a thud that made him wince, from here, if he leaned in a little, he could see Hylia walking away.

Link looked at his hands gripping his knees. Hylia had become warmer than before, friendlier, so close Link only had to raise his voice for her to come see him.

And Link felt this to be as strange and wrong as him still being alive. She had stayed for him, that much was certain, and it was wrong - A Goddess on earth staying for a mortal.

Hylia hummed from outside, the sound rode the wind and made Link raise his head in attention. This was all he had always dreamed. For her to be with him.

And Link knew it was wrong.

Knowing it was wrong and working knowing it was wrong were two different things. Especially when Hylia was smiling more, talking more and being more open with Link than whatever he could have had dreamed before. If not for Hylia's covert support Link would have found it more difficult to find strenght within him, would have found it difficult to keep on fighting for recovery. Without her he would have let himself go. But since Hylia was now looking at him, skirt clenched and eyes wide, Link kept on walking around the garden. He felt his lungs weren't working with him, and that his legs were twitching too much for his liking, but Hylia's eyes kept on following him so Link gave another step.

Nothing prompted this. Link was content with the way they were living. Once you could live your dream you shouldn't strive for more, in fears of jixing it. So the next sentence came out of Link's mouth not expecting an answer, as the way his breathing was hurting his throat made him irritable and he had long ago closed his eyes in hopes of mustering a state of mind where the pain was nonexistant and his patience was infinite. Link snapped out of it a lap later as his side had started to hurt in tandem with his head, his hands came to rest on the wound on his abdomen and Link wheezed, "I'm dying."

And then from his side Link heard a soft laugh that made him raise his head. Hylia was holding a glass of water and she gave him the sweetest smile, "No, you're not, you're healing."

Link shook his head, trying to think of anything to say rather than stare at her like a fool. His mouth opened and, "Uh, sure."

He was a fool. He was a fool.

Hylia snickered and patted his arm, "Give yourself time. Let's go eat."

Link nodded, saw her walk in front of him and closed his eyes.

A fool.

Link breathed once, twice, he relaxed and let go of the arrow. The wind whistled around and the arrow hit bullseye. The deer gave a shrill cry and ran through the woods. Link breathed out and a puff of mist filled his view, the deer walked a few meters away and wobbled, it fell a little farther.

Link kneeled next to it, knife in hand, "May you come back and live again, we thank you for the life you had," he cut through the deer's throat, while the animal's last cry was drowned between the trees.

On the way back to their house, Link's boots sinked added centimeters thanks to the deer's weight. The new skin on his abdomen felt tight but there was no worry of it opening again - Link had made sure to practice time and time again before being satisfied.

As Link walked through the snow he thought about Hylia, he wondered whether she was warm enough in front of the chimney, maybe she was knitting, maybe just doozing off.

Link's boot sinked farther than normal and he cursed. Maybe Hylia was waiting for him with soup on the pot. Link could even smell it.

Hylia had been vehement on making sure Link had everything he needed to go out to hunt. Hylia had made him promise to be careful and to take care of himself. Hylia had told him she was more than capable of hunting. It had taken a whole week to have her give him the ok.

Link still didn't know how he was supposed to tell her that he couldn't possibly accept anything more from her.

He was fine now, he could handle his sword, he could handle his shield. The bow had been the first thing to come back in full. He could take care of himself, he had still a little left before he was to his full capacity, but he didn't need Hylia to look over him now.

She was free to go.

Link saw the sillhouete of their house through the woods. The snow covered every other plant and flowers he and Hylia had taken care for, snow piled around a shovel-digged clearing around the house, and now, watching the smoke coming out of the chimney and the lights pouring out from the windows, Link started to feel the bite of the howling wind around him, the way this boots sinked into the snow and the way his feet were sloshing in warm water.

He could call for Hylia to come help him, but the thought of bringing her to the cold made him toughen up and adjust the deer's body over his shoulders. If he could have had it his way, he would have been able to get to their home without trouble, leave the deer in the shack they left their tools in, and make a fine entrance into the house, wind howling at his back and air slightly toussling his hair.

If he could have had it his way.

Because as soon as he got out of the woods a shadow moved in front of the warm-colored windows, and Hylia's worried voice was carried to him.

Link got to leave the deer in the shack, but Hyllia was fussing over him and his wounds and his wellbeing and whether he wanted to eat first or maybe warm himself with a bath. The moment Link took off his boots and entered the house, the moment Hylia's hands brushed with his owns in an attempt to help him get rid of his sodded clothes, the moment Hylia warmed Link's nose with her hands and the only answer Link got out of her was an innocent giggle. The moment Link told her he would love to eat first and Hylia started to tell him about all of the things he had missed the past few days, Link knew. Link feared. Link grabbed his spoon so hard he could see his knuckles becoming white.

And though he had thought this adveture would serve for his cause to argue he was fine to overcome whatever obstacle he would have to face in order to help her and free her. Of him. Of this. Link remained silent.

It was unsightly, unbecoming, unreasonable and completely selfish. And for once, Link did not care. Hadn't he earned this? Hadn't he payed already for this?

And if he had done. How long would it last? How long till Hylia grew tired of him and his uselessness, got tired of him and his childishness. How long would he be able to delude himself. That this was right.

Link wasn't sure any of his thoughts could hold his ground against reality. He knew if he pushed them to the truth something would crumble.

But Hylia was the truth, and she had remained quiet and calm and not eager at all to confront Link about them.

And if Link knew one thing, it was to obey her.

So a month after the deer, the moment Hylia was cutting some meat at the counter, after Link had come to terms with... with whatever they were, in the middle of one of their usual conversations, Hylia yelped and crouched over her hand.

It didn't came as fast as it should, really, this realization, Link ran towards Hylia with worry etched on his face, asking aloud whether the cut was deep and how much it hurt, and he was next to her loking at her injured hand as if he could muster some otherwordly power to heal her.

When it clicked.

Had he dreamed about it too much? Had he made her stay for too long in this accursed realm? Had he desired this with such strenght that reality itself had shifted? His Goddess... wounded... his saviour... mortal... his Hylia...

... smiling sweetly at him, "It was nothing, it only looks bad."

Link watched her go with a blank stare.

Why was it that whenever something made his chest hurt, weeping at her skirts seemed like such a good idea?

[deiliamedlini]

WIP Wednesday

I’ve mostly been just writing the newest pirate chapter that I posted yesterday (subtle plug hahaha), but this was what I was working on just before. This is from the same fic as this WIP Wednesday. I don’t want to post this one yet because it still kind of sucks (like this, which is not edited at all), so I’m still fixing everything I have so far before actually posting. But today isn’t called Post a Fic Wednesday, it’s called WIP Wednesday, and this is a WIP!

Essentially, Link is tasked with training Zelda to defend herself after a series of Yiga attacks on her life. After some time, they’ve become good friends. She has him come to her room for lessons she doesn’t want ‘on the record’ basically, which is why Link is chilling in her room in this section. Totally not to make things unnecessarily dramatic.

~~~

When Link arrived that night, Zelda wasn’t in her room. He poked around for a moment just to make sure, and then relented to sit on her bed to wait for her, setting down his belt on the chest at the foot of her bed as he always did.

It was unusual that she wasn’t there. However, for the past several days, he’d been finding her waiting for him at the window, usually watching him scale the building with a look that betrayed her awe and her horror.

By her bedside were notebooks and tombs, all with marked pages. They ranged from geography, to biology. His hand reached out to take a book about plants, but he heard footsteps in the hall, followed by the booming voice of King Rhoam.

“Shit,” he muttered, looking around quickly before he slid into the closet just as Zelda’s door opened.

“—with the new treaty. I think that would be useful.”

“Yes,” Zelda agreed, softer than her father. “I think that would work, but we’d have to find a way to incorporate the Gerudo as well. Urbosa is instrumental, and I don’t believe we should keep her out.”

“That’s favoritism.”

“That’s being practical,” she challenged.

Rhoam chuckled. “You are learning well, Zelda. We will contact Urbosa immediately to inform her and see her position.”

“Thank you.”

“Well,” Rhoam said, “I’m going to head to bed now. Is there anything you need, or are you all set?”

“I’m fine; thank you.”

“It’s been a while, hasn’t it?” he said wistfully.

“Since the Yiga attack? Yes, quite a while.”

“I’m sorry I haven’t been as attentive.”

“No, but it’s really okay. I know the thought is there.”

There was the sound of rustling fabric that Link assumed was Rhoam hugging Zelda.

Then, “What’s that?”

Link peeked his head out to see what the king meant, and when he saw his belt still on Zelda’s trunk, he groaned as quietly as possible.

Zelda was fast, though. Her eyes darted around, looking for him, but she simply tsked, a lie springing to her lips far too easily. “It’s Link’s. He left it after we trained, and I didn’t feel like searching for him afterwards, so I just brought it back with me. I’m going to return it in the morning.”

“Ah,” Rhoam said, picking it up. “You should have gotten it back to him immediately. Looks like there’s some stuff he needs on here. I’m surprised he didn’t seek you out.”

Zelda swallowed and shrugged. “He’s diligent. Maybe he didn’t want to leave his post. Or he has spares. Or, most likely, he knew I’d just return it in the morning.”

“Hrmm, true.” Rhoam examined one of the daggers. “You should keep it in your wardrobe rather than laying around. What if someone did manage to get in here? A Yiga, or some other threat? Then you’ve just left a whole arsenal at the foot of your bed.”

“Then I’d just have weapons at my disposal to defend myself.” Zelda took it and made her way to her closet. “But I understand your point, father. You’re paranoid but—” Zelda yelped in surprise at the sight of Link innocently standing hidden in the closet, his head between two of her dresses.

“Zelda?” her father asked, hurriedly turning to her. “What is it?”

With a quick motion, Zelda pulled the dagger out just a bit and slid her thumb along it.

She turned to Rhoam with a light stream of blood moving down her wrist. “I cut myself. Don’t worry.” Handing Link his belt, as if she were hanging it up, she closed the door, giving him an exasperated look as she did.

Rhoam bit his lip nervously and handed her a nearby cloth. “Good thing you two haven’t covered blades yet. Make sure Link gives you all the safety protocols first. We don’t want that to happen on a larger scale.”

“Yes, father. I know.”

“Need any help with that, or are you all set?”

“I’m just going to wash it out. It’s fine, but thank you.”

“Okay then. Goodnight, Zelda. May the Goddess watch over your sleep.”

“Goodnight, father.”

Rhoam looked her over one more time before closing the door behind him with a tell-tale thud.

Zelda breathed out a sigh of relief. “You almost gave me a heart attack.”

Stepping out of the closet, Link grinned at her and tossed his belt right back onto the chest at the foot of her bed. “You were late.”

“I’m the Princess of Hyrule. I’m not late.”

“Terrible logic,” he said, snorting. But he grabbed a wash basin and brought it to her.

“Thanks.”

He watched her dip her hand into the water and flinch as it lapped over her wound. Resisting the urge to help her, he grabbed the top book from her pile instead.

“No, wait!” Zelda said, crossing the room quickly to try to snatch the book from him, hand dripping still.

“Plants and Horticulture of Hyrule Field.” He raised his eyebrow and flipped to her bookmark. “Are you planning to start a gard—oh!” A grin spread over his face as he read the words on the page. “Guardian technology? Hoarding your blasphemous texts, are we? Are you going to start tinkering with them again?”

“You know I’m not allowed to, so give it back!” Zelda burned red and grabbed his arm to try to pull at him, but with one hand, it was a losing fight. Still, she tried feebly, knowing he’d already seen it, so there wasn’t much reason to really fight anyway. It wasn’t as if he was going to rat her out either. She was simply at the mercy of his teasing for a few moments.

“How did you even get ahold of this?” he chuckled, turning the page at random as his eyes scanned over the words. “Isn’t half of this stuff forbidden to be this close to the castle?”

But they both answered at once, the obvious answer hitting him immediately as Zelda was ready to confess: “Purah.”

This time, Zelda just crossed her arms. “I wanted to… experiment. So, I have a fake cover on it in case someone nosey decides to grab the book! You know my father is paranoid.”

“I do know that.”

“It’s just harmless fun!” she said, still feeling the need to defend herself and her thick tomb. “I’m never allowed to have fun, especially with the books they make me read. I want to read about the blast radius the Guardians have while powered by a massive ancient core! And I want to know the components of a Sheikah slate, so, so badly. My father won’t let me do any of it. I just want to read something that isn’t so political!”

Link hummed and nodded. “That’s true. Those books are the worst. My favorite was, gods, what was it called? An Economic History of the Merchant’s Guild of Hyrule. That’s the one that only spit out rupee facts that you kept telling me, right?”

She blushed a bit more fiercely this time at the level of attention Link had paid her without her realizing, and she pushed him by the arm. “Okay, get out.”

He watched her turn redder by the minute and turned back to her to tap his fingers against the hardcover book tucked in her arms. “You know I’m not making fun of you, right? I think it’s admirable how much you prepare.”

Letting out a breath, she threw herself back onto the bed and slammed her book into her forehead with a groan.

Link chuckled and pried the book from her hands. “I’m serious. You’ll make a good queen.”

Her eyes suddenly darted up to his. She wasn’t sure she’d ever heard anyone tell her that, except maybe her father during her moments of absolute despair when he knew she needed to be cheered up.

Flipping the pages of the Guardian text, Link narrowed his eyes, flipped another page, glanced at her, and then flipped the page again. He waved the book in front of her face. “You wonder why the Goddess doesn’t like you; it’s because you write in your books. Ink is permanent you know.”

She ripped the book from his hand and hit him in the arm with it, doing her best not to let her laugh at his jab break through her angry façade. “I’m aware.”

Watching a drop of blood trail down her finger, Link reached out and cupped her hand in his just before the long trail dropped onto the page. “That’ll stain almost as much as ink. You should wrap that up.”

Zelda let him lead her back to the water, keeping the blood in his hand until they were safe. He dipped his hands in first and shook them out, noticing that there was only one rag.

“Thank you.”

“You really shouldn’t have done that, you know,” Link said, watching the water turn redder.

“I had to think fast, okay? Try ‘thank you for not letting me get caught in your closet, Zelda.’ If I can do it, so can you.”

“Fine. Thank you. I appreciate you covering for me, but you didn’t have to injure yourself to cause an appropriate distraction.”

“You’re so annoying,” she breathed. “End it at ‘thank you.’”

“Why do you put up with me?” Link laughed, handing her the rag.

She wrapped it around her finger, letting the wound clot. “Because.”

“Because--?”

“Because. Because I just do.”

“That makes no sense.”

“Fine. Because I think you’re amusing. Whether that’s a good thing or not is dependent on the situation.”

Link grinned softly, barely noticeable in anything but his eyes.

Zelda watched him, content in their mutual silence.

But even that had to end.

After her cut had stopped bleeding, Zelda pointed to the empty space in the room. “Okay. Get on the ground.”

“Demands, demands, Princess.”

[needs-to-stop-looking-at-yigas]

Hahaha sooo SOMEONE is experiencing really bad pms cramps and so I was wondering if you could by any chance write something with Pomma and Sooga? Like- Pomma is on her 🩸 too and Sooga is pampering her like the fucking simp he is? And maybe he’s into period sex too idk lol I’m just going off on a tangent here 😭

Fucking, period club my bitch. Let me see what I can do for you man.

"Pomma? I'm back, I hope you weren't waiting too long."

Kohga was out on some meeting with Rhoam, so it was up to Sooga to cheer up his other love in his life; Pomma. She was raked in pain and agony. Body acting and bloated and bleeding-Sooga could only imagine this awful this period was. He knew what to do, having grown up in a house full of women, but he could only partially understand her strife.

She looked up from her bed, groaning. Her hair was a mess, and she looked exhausted, but he still found her stunning. He set the tray down, and placed the hot rag on her lower stomach. He did research, and this was something that was supposed to help the cramps.

"Oof...thank you, Soogy. Did you-"

"Get what you requested? Absolutely. I apologize I couldn't make It, but I feel like you'd like some actually good seafood paella. I DID catch the fish myself though."

"Aw, how sweet of you. My big, strong Soogy, going out and fishing for his lady~"

She held onto his strong, pretty chin, and watched him melt into her touch. It wasn’t until she let him go, that he recalled what he was doing. Right, Sooga, focus. He cleared his throat, helping her sit up, before grabbing a spoonful of the fragrant looking rice. Despite her chuckling at it, he still spoon fed it to her, even going so far as to clean her face when she had just a small bit of mess on her pretty features. He could tell she wasn't savoring it though, and he knew exactly why.

"Pomma."

"Come on! I've been begging for it all daaaay."

She whined. Sooga sighed, putting the bowl down, before reaching for the small box. Kohga liked having all sorts of expensive and fancy treats to himself, but Sooga was the only one to know the hiding spot. He wouldn't mind missing a few, surely. She sat there eagerly, finally having something that DIDN'T suck today. Caramels, fudge, nuts- all types of goodies, all for her. She cut out the middle man, and yoinked the box from his hands, helping herself blissfully. Sooga chuckled, taking a minute to watch her. 

"Satisfied?"

"Uh huh. I mean, sucks for you, YOU have to explain what happened to Kohga’s candy."

"Oh he'll understand. Hopefully. Regardless, you let me worry about him. I want to cater to you in every way I can. You're precious and beautiful to me."

She groaned, laying back down in quite a grumpy way.

"Ugh, I don't FEEL beautiful. I feel gross and bloated. I'm like a hippo."

"...a pretty hippo?"

"I will show your balls what I'm going through."

Sooga held his hands up a bit in defense.

"Apologies, thought it'd be funny. But truly, I find you just as beautiful today as I did yesterday. Every single bit of you."

She licked what remained of the chocolate from her fingers, before looking in his direction.

"You're not just saying that, are you?"

He took her hand in his, nodding as he gave it a light squeeze.

"You look incredible. Truly. The only woman I can find myself attracted to."

She chuckled, running her fingers through her hair. He loved it when she did that. Always made her look so pretty.

"Wish I could feel that. Instead I just feel all bloated and in pain and just, MONSTER horny, it's bullshit."

Sooga cocked his head to the side.

"You...you feel aroused. While you're on your period?"

"Well not EVERY woman, obviously, but I do a huge chunk of the time, yeah."

"Would you like me to help?"

Pomma raised a brow at him, as if he just said something stupid.

"You know I'm bleeding, right? Like. A lot. You'd be putting your dick in that."

"I have no qualms,"

He puffed out his chest a bit, not at all wanting to disappoint his love. Even though the idea DID make him hesitate, just a bit.

"I mean, what man would I be, if I couldn't have you as you were?"

She looked him up and down, expecting some punchline. When she didn’t get any, she seemed just a bit hesitant. 

"I don't know, Sooga. I mean, I would LOVE that, really, but this isn't your speed, and-"

He cut her off when he pressed his lips against hers. It was just a simple enough of a distraction for him to slip his hands past her clothes, kneading and massaging at her chest. Oh, the way she moaned into his mouth. He pulled away, but kept his forehead pressed against hers.

"I will not force myself upon you. But I beg you to let me prove myself to you. I beg you let me soothe you in any way I can."

She let her hand glide up his chest slowly, as if she was just noticing his muscular form.

"I...okay. But if the blood grosses you out, I don't expect you to keep going, okay?"

He nodded. He peeled off her clothes, ever amazed by her body. Beautiful, full, abundant in stretch marks and soft flesh. He started off with her chest, tongue twirling the nipple in his mouth, his other hand pinching and pulling. She wasn't kidding when she said she was aroused. Her hands were on him in a second, feeling up his frame greedily, and legs were twitching oh so adorably. 

"Hmmm...you can't wait too much longer, can you?"

"Don't act so cocky-"

"But you like that. I can see it by the way you look at me. You want me to take care of you. And I VERY much enjoy doing just that."

He usually wasn't so coy, especially with Pomma, but he couldn’t help it. Her flushed cheeks left him unable to be so restrained. He sat up for a minute, and made quite the show of taking his clothes off (save for the mask), just to give her something nice to look at. Once nude, he pulled her closer by her big, pretty thighs, pressing his hard cock against her absolutely soaked pussy. She looked up at him, lightly smacking him at his core.

"You suck. What happened to my good boy? Not this. Cocky fuckhead."

"This 'cocky fuckhead' made you laugh though, didn't he?"

He leaned down to kiss her precious nose, before slipping inside of her. He watched her lips quiver as soon as he felt him inside of her. He pushed himself fully into her, until his balls pressed against her ass. He studied her face, not looking underneath them. All that mattered was that she was wet for him, and that her face oozed pleasure. She grabbed at his frame, and the sight of her melting around him; there wasn't a sight in all of Hyrule that looked as beautiful. 

"S-shit, mommy needed this."

"I can tell. You haven't smiled like this all day. And that, is by far, the MOST arousing thing about you. Now please, let me see how content I've made you."

Sooga always knew how to treat her. Knew her body needed a certain pace or a certain touch. 

"S-Sooga-"

He could read her like a battlefield. He gave her exactly what she wanted. He hoisted her feet over his shoulders, pushing his cock right into that perfect spot. Her head tossed itself back, her giant breasts bounced in time with his thrusts, and with the help of a firm hand on her ever sensitive clit, she came. He knew her cute little toes curled when she came, and it made his heart absolutely melt for her. He pulled himself out slowly.

"You're lovely. Radiant. Precious. Ganon himself would love to have the chance to touch-FUCKING HELL."

She snapped out of her lust fueled daze quickly, looking up at him in panic.

"WHAT'S WRONG?!"

"Apologies, I uh. Just saw I'm covered in blood, and I panicked. Thought I hurt you. Or me."

"Did. Did you think you broke your dick??"

"I'm no medical expert, but I didn't rule that out."

"Oh my god I just got my g-spot hit by an absolute moron."

"A moron who loves you."

She laughed into her hand, shaking her head. Her body was sweaty, blood was at her thighs, and her heart was trying to calm the fuck down.

"Yeah. I love you too. Come here, give mommy some sugar~"

"Yes ma'am."

He leaned down to pepper her sweet lips in kisses, before she softly cupped his face in her hands.

"You take such good care of me."

"You deserve to be cared for. Now, how about I start you a nice, hot bath, and change the sheets for you?"

"Depends. Do I get the fancy bath salts?"

"Anything less would bring shame to my name, my darling."

How could he have been so lucky, to be able to help someone so incredible?