#resilienceismadeof

[uncontrollablyme]

She is me, but I am no longer her. Yesterday I found some old journals. The black holes of my past. Like reading a book someone else wrote. Tales of another life, sorrowful then painful, questioning and then overcoming. It contained a stagnancy of abuse, a litany of soul crushing, me caught it a place I couldn’t stay in or flee from. A literal hell. I mused at my questions, my meditations from over ten years ago. I anguished over how hard I was on myself, in the most difficult times of my life. Compounding the trauma and suffering. A complete cycle of abandonment. It captured me, sucked me back in time. It taught me how loyal I am. I see now that I am the exact stuff resilience is made of. The wreckage behind me, always a part of my journey, no longer defines me. I am no longer her. Fierce in place of sad. Whole where it was once fractured. Strong and sure instead of weak and unable. Stable in growth where I once begged for understanding. Proud now, of how far I’ve come, versus overwhelmed by how much further I have yet to go. Excited for the future, no longer dreading the days. Loving and wholeheartedly open rather than shackled to abuse and emptiness. She is me but I am no longer her. . . . . . . . . . . Photo: @daniellemcveyphotography #sheisme #resilienceismadeof #wholehearted #blackholes #pasttense #purposefulliving #imperfectionsarebeautiful #uncontrollablyme #speakyourtruth #my_story #survivalmakesusbetter #madhope #unabashedly #mentalhealthawareness #compelledtolove #domesticviolencesurvivor #linkisinthebio #humanwork #resiliencesquad #lets_chat #survivallooksgood #journalling #heartmatters (at 64th Street Seashore State Park) https://www.instagram.com/p/BttDg1LhPer/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=10swfusmlcroc