#resanoona

[sheetsonfire]

The Red Strokes

Fandom: Chicago PD

Pairing: Jay Halstead x Reader

Genre: angst, romance, fluff

Word Count: 4611

Summary: Wires are crossed and assumptions are made, can the reader and Jay resolve what has been left unsaid?

A/N: I'm finally posting again, hooray! This is part of @resanoona's #resa.3kfiestabingo! I'm using this fic to fill the "Fight That Ends In A Kiss" square!

-

Oh, the blues will be blue and the jealousies green

But when love picks its shade it demands to be seen

Oh, the red strokes

Passions uncaged

Thundering moments of tenderness rage

Oh, the red strokes

Tempered and strong (Fearlessly drawn)

Burning the night like the dawn

-

The Red Strokes by Garth Brooks

-

You sit in the passenger seat of Kevin’s car on the way back to the 21st, your mind is a whir of clouded thoughts that morph from one thing to the next until you ultimately settle back on that one thing that sticks into you like the mother of all thorns.

“Hey, Y/N?” Kevin approaches gently, he and Kim had debated about it that very morning whether he should say anything at all, but given how you and Jay were bickering at the scene today, he felt it necessary to at least try and help somehow.

“Yeah, Kev?” You ask almost robotically, still transfixed to the outside world blurring at the same speed as those thoughts in your mind, your chest ached something fierce.

“You can tell me to mind my business, and I want you to know I appreciate you and respect you, but…” Kevin pauses, clicking his teeth as he hesitates to finish.

You owed Kevin this much, he was your partner now and it was important to not shut out the one person you so intrinsically relied on from day to day. The irony of that code of conduct was not lost on you, given how you and Jay treated each other at the moment. “It’s okay, Kev, you can ask whatever’s on your mind.” You sigh, smiling sadly, waiting for the words you knew might come next.

Kevin takes a breath, calculating his words carefully, “I get not challenging Voight on the change of partner, he’s got his rules and his own decisions to make. I just don’t get what’s happening to you and Halstead, right now. This isn’t you, and it sure ain’t him, you two seem to be arguing over sharing the air that you breathe”

There’s a beat of silence, and you swallow. You can tell Kevin seems to be worried he’s overstepped, but you hold out a hand with a small shake of your head. 

“You’re not wrong, Kev.” You say quietly as if uttering the words would destroy the wall you'd built to keep thoughts of Jay out.

“Did you ever ask him what was on his mind?” Your partner’s tone is soft, it’s not laced with accusation, only a simple reminder of things you had ignored in cowardice and fear. 

“I-... He never asked me either, Kev. He didn’t even fight it, he welcomed it, couldn’t wait to call her ‘partner’, and show her the great land of the 21st District like he was some royal prince who had found better blood to share the kingdom with.” 

The lack of an answer from Kevin only makes your words feel as petulant as they had sounded and felt coming out of your mouth.

“I’m sorry, Kevin. I know, you’re right. I didn’t ask him, and he didn’t ask me. We let it go, we let each other go and now I don’t how to change that. I get so angry when I see them together. She’s an amazing detective and she’s been nothing but good to me, and yet…I can't seem to shake it. What if they’re good together, and not just at work? I’m not making a fool of myself like that, man.”

Kevin hums in thought, “I can’t prove 100% there ain’t nothing going on, Y/N. But I’ve known Jay for a while now, just like you have, and I think he’s trying real hard to not push it with you. He’s not letting go, I think he’s trying to hold on to whatever’s left and let you do what you need to do. And you can slap me for saying it, but it can’t keep on like this, Y/N, or you’re gonna lose all of it.”

The words linger in the car, and your eyes sting with the beginnings of unshed tears. Atwater wasn’t wrong on anything. You had been so busy focusing on what Jay was or wasn’t doing, that you hadn’t done anything to help this situation either.

You needed to fix it, and fast.

-

[Flashback Dream] 

When Hailey Upton gets assigned to Intelligence it’s immediately easy to see why she had been handpicked by Voight. Her quick thinking, unrelenting energy and knack for being unphased by what others thought of her made for good police work. Hank had clearly thought so too, given that at the end of that first week he decided she should join Jay as the only other detective in the unit and be his partner. Instead of you.

Voight tells you and Jay in his office one morning, and more hurtful than the news itself is Jay’s lack of reaction. In fact, he seems all too happy to nod and say, “Of course, Sarge, she’ll fit right in.” This leaves you with no choice but to nod and say “Of course, Sarge.” too, even if you actually wanted to say “What the fuck, Hank?” and “What the fuck, Jay?”

Throughout the day you wait for Jay to tug you aside in the break room, or in a corridor, or strike up a conversation in the basement as you gear up for a scene, but he never does. He never tells you that he hates the decision, he never tells you that he would miss you, that he wants you. 

Of course, you could have chosen to tell him first, but that felt like an unthinkable option. The vulnerability of such a situation didn’t seem possible, so when Jay’s first move still doesn’t come you tell yourself to keep your mouth shut.

She’s better than you, that’s what you decide. Your first instinct is to turn your frustration and hurt inward, you make yourself respect Voight’s decision and tell yourself that it’s what you deserve. To lose Jay is your own doing, you weren’t good enough to be Detective Halstead’s partner, whether that be personal or professional.

“It’s good to have you on board, Upton. Welcome to Intelligence.” Jay was as ever the professional, shaking Hailey’s hand as he spoke. You watched from behind your computer as he smiled at her. There was some sort of recognition or connection there as if they’d met before.

You were about to return to work, choosing to force yourself to get over the juvenile feelings of jealousy and resentment, focusing on the notes in front of you. However, from across the way, you hear those fateful words that send you right back into a spin.

“Come on, partner, let me show you the locker room.” The words flow with ease as he gestures for Hailey to go first, not even glancing at you as he walks away.

Hank seems to sense your gaze, focusing on you for a moment with eyes that are knowing, that feel somehow judging and reproachful, they seem to say “This is exactly why he’s got a new partner.” without saying anything at all. 

The air leaves you a little and the sting of embarrassment knocks you for six. You were an idiot for thinking Jay really liked being your partner, and you were a bigger idiot for thinking that there was something between you and him that would somehow survive Hank’s law of no relationships. Ironic considering you and Jay seemed to be the furthest away from a relationship than you’d ever been.

You swallow the last bitter and cold drops of your coffee, losing yourself in the brightness of your screen and the dancing profiles in front of you.

Heartbreak was not on your agenda for today, no matter how much your chest hurt.

[End of Flashback Dream]

You wake up from the memories with a sharp intake of breath, the hurt in your chest proves to be in the waking world as your anxiety thuds out a wild rhythm with your heart. You're unable to stop replaying the day it had all started to turn sour.

-

Things felt particularly scary this morning, after your talk with Kevin in the car, you had decided to extend the olive branch to Jay. You felt a good portion of the responsibility for the current predicament, in the moments of clarity and hindsight you could see Jay was simply following orders and respecting the decision that had been made.

It was you that had let the jealousy consume you, it was you that had turned every action into a slight on you. 

You could have just asked Jay what he thought or felt, then you would have had an answer to react to. Instead, you had let him think the worst, and he had let you run rampant with your indignation.

Today was going to be different, you were going to make sure of it.

-

Walking up the stairs to the bullpen you had coffees and pastries for everyone, spotting that you were on time but still the last to appear. 

You give everyone a smile as you set down the goods, responding to the “Good morning”s and the “Hey”s you received. 

You meet Jay and Hailey’s eyes, offering them the same genuine greeting, complimenting Hailey on her hoodie which really did look cosy. 

You could at least commend yourself on the fact that you had never taken any of this out on her, in fact, you both got on really well. She had only the misfortune of walking into whatever was going on between you and her new partner.

“Jay, can I borrow you for a moment?” You ask as disarmingly as you can, finally striking up the courage to really look at him for more than a few seconds, mustering a smile that wasn’t so totally laced with fear or sadness.

Jay swallows, nodding, “Uh yeah, of course, Y/N. Let me just-”

It’s your miserable luck as Voight comes out of his office holding files with a look of immediacy on his face.

“We’ve got a case, and the wheels are already rolling on this one, robbery-homicide wants our help. It’s going to be undercover, got us some rich white folks getting ripped and killed in the process. Jay and Hailey will do the UC.”

All of your personal thoughts are swept by the tide of work from the minute Hank slaps the first few victim profiles on the whiteboard, along with suspects and locations.

-

The case is in full swing for most of the week, you make sure to be a partner Kevin likes having and one that he deserves. He had always been good to you ever since you were put in the unit, but especially now he had been there for you and that wasn’t something you let yourself forget. He could have easily chewed you out a few times here and there but he hadn’t, only extending you patience and understanding instead.

The real speedbump test of your sanity comes when Jay is finally put undercover with Hailey on the third day of the investigation. They were supposed to pose as a couple trying to rent a highly-priced apartment. They would meet with the realtor who was in cahoots with the suspected gang and would scope out potential locations for a robbery. 

The idea was that new residents were naive enough to share secure and private information with their realtor, exchanging details about their routines and their valuables that they wouldn’t otherwise share. That information would then be passed on, and the new residents would become the next targets on the hit list.

Of course, being a couple meant Jay and Hailey were going to be doing and saying couple-y things, and that had been particularly daunting for you after weeks of concealed pining and missing your partner's proximity.

You listened on the wire with Adam and Kim in the van with you, on the monitor you could see Jay and Hailey holding hands around the tour of the apartment, discussing excitedly where they were going to put valuable pieces of art, sculptures and historical artefacts in the office space. 

They would exchange doting looks and the occasional kiss, each gesture only serving to drive pressure into your forehead between your eyes. It was surely giving you a migraine.

Still, you stayed the course, you supported your team when they needed it, and you did everything you needed to put the job first. The rest of the day was spent trailing the realtor around and following their digital footprint until eventually, you realise you had caught them on a greedy day.

Jay and Hailey’s appointment with the realtor had been an information-gathering exercise, that rip wouldn’t happen for the next few days, you had expected the investigation to carry on until the week’s end, but it turned out that the gang were in a daring mood. 

Keen to try a previously planned rip on a different home that same afternoon, the gang’s activity had Intelligence moving fast to the next location. 

You held onto Kevin’s shoulder as you followed him down the corridor on the ground floor of a three-floor mansion that had just been renovated. The air still smelled of paint and plaster as you shuffled in the now-darkening rooms toward the back of the property where the gang’s commotion could be heard.

Your team moved in unison and unspoken communication as you, Kevin, Adam and Kim flanked either side of the property.

Jay, Hailey and Hank had moved to the back of the property, and each small team had officers from robbery-homicide with them.

It’s over almost as quickly as it starts, the open plan nature of the property and the countless windows and doors made it easy to see inside and attack from the most ideal points.

The masked figures guarding the family drop like flies as officers pick them off one-by-one. You and Kim move fast toward the twin girls in the family, untying their bonds whilst Kevin and Adam get the parents. 

Behind you is the commotion of Hank, Jay and Hailey’s team taking care of the other gang members who appear from upstairs on the property. 

You clutch the child in your care to you, shielding them from any wayward bullets or unseen assailants until a chorus of “Clears” is yelled out by each of the leading officers.

The smell of gunsmoke is strong, you and Kim wrap the girls in your jackets until ambos can arrive to check them out, carefully leading them to their parents who sob in relief when they see their children are okay.

You turn to Kim to check she’s all good, then you scan the room to catch the eyes of the rest of your team, glad to see that everyone was fine. 

The eyes that you catch last are the green ones that make your body hot and cold, your heart constricts as it remembers the deed it’s yet to do. 

Then, Hailey is in view and she’s slinging an arm over Jay’s shoulder, clearly and rightly satisfied with the results of the bust. 

The eye contact between you and Jay is broken as soon as it’s even made, you watch as Jay wraps his arm around her waist, laughing at something she says.

You don’t waste any more time on the feelings that were fighting their way back to the forefront of your mind. Instead, you turn back to the others to discuss the cleanup and the procedure that follows a bust.

Unaware that those green eyes had returned to watching you as you head out to direct forensics inside.

-

It’s late in the evening when you finally have a cocktail in hand, sat next to Kim as the bustle of the bar surrounds you and your team.

Everyone from Intelligence, except for Hank, was letting the pressure of the week’s work decompress with a few rounds at Molly’s. So it wasn’t even like you were the third wheel with Jay and Hailey. Yet somehow after that moment between them back at the scene, your sour mood had returned with full force.

Once you’d changed back into civilian clothes at the District, you were back to driving yourself crazy with your own petty thoughts, wishing like hell you could just let it all go. 

You had yet to even see the evidence of a relationship between them that wasn’t professional, friendly or strictly undercover related. Beyond a good rapport, sincere eye contact and the occasional hug or playful punch, there was literally nothing else to report. All things of those things you and Jay had shared at one time or another, but those small things, rightly or wrongly, had become something big to you. 

You found it hard to keep that forced laughter going, found it hard to even look at Jay for longer than a few seconds. You’d caught the way his face dropped each time you made eye contact, the way he’d take a long swig of his beer to swallow down whatever was on his mind. His apparent indifference was maddening.

Everything Hailey and Jay said or did somehow affronted you, and the more you tried to get a handle on your emotions the worse it somehow felt. Kim had sensed your distracted and irritated mood, doing her resolute best to turn your attention to her, Kevin and Adam - it had little effect.

“Hey, do you need an escape route?” Kim whispered, a gentle hand on the small of your back.

This would have been the moment to call it quits and head home for some much-needed sleep; but your nerves were frayed beyond the point of salvation, frozen in your seat and doomed to stew in your own jealousy, confusion and anger. 

Shaking your head at Kim with a weak smile, holding onto the tattered shreds of appearing sociable and engaged, you take another sip of your cocktail. You focus on the tangy burn of the alcohol as you hear Hailey laugh at something Jay had said.

Adam gives Kim a look, and she worries her lip between her teeth. She couldn’t see how this would end well either, but you were nothing if not stubborn.

When it came down to it, this was all about your shaken confidence and your lack of ability to make the first move. You had tried so hard to protect yourself from your feelings towards Jay that now you were staring at a possible reality that you’d driven him away altogether. 

You knew deep down that Jay had never pulled away, he was only keeping a respectful distance to honour the steps away from him you had taken - Kevin had been totally right about that, you were sure. You had wanted Jay to try harder, which wasn’t fair, and you hated yourself for it.

“-and that’s when Y/N said…well, Y/N, you tell them, you can do the story justice.” 

Several seconds pass when your brain offers the information that someone had been talking to you. That someone is Adam. You snap your head up from your staring at the watermarks on the table, seeing that your friends were waiting for your input with expectant, somewhat waning happy faces.

“Uh, ha, yeah. So-... actually guys, I’m sorry, I need some fresh air. Be right back, you all get a round on me.” You stand, feeling the alcohol in your legs, still mostly sober but weighed down by everything else.

You’re haphazardly fishing cash out from your pocket, passing it to Kim with a nod as you wander hurriedly towards the front door of Molly’s, the panic and upset bubbling to the surface. You don’t look back at the confused expressions or the worried murmurs between the group and some of the other patrons who knew you.

-

As soon as you’re outside you feel the embarrassment wash over you like pins and needles, the pit in your stomach feels like it could devour you from the inside out. You’re feeling childish, you’re feeling wronged, you’re feeling stupid, and you’re feeling the fire in so many directions you’re not sure where it’s going to land first.

Unfortunately for Jay, he chooses that exact moment of your conflict to try and catch up with you outside.

“Y/N? What’s going on, come on, talk to me we can’t keep doing this-” 

You know it isn’t his fault and not even close to the accuracy of the situation, but your mouth doesn’t get the memo and the venom passes your lips before you can stop it.

“Talk to you, Jay? Don’t even say that to me! You don’t look at me, talk to me, or acknowledge me for weeks, and now I’m supposed to talk to you? Did you suddenly get bored of playing house with Hailey? Am I going to be the next best option, huh? I don’t think so! I’m not stupid and I’m not something you can pick and choose when the mood takes you. So just go back inside and leave me be!”

The words linger in the cold air between you and Jay. You watch his eyes harden, and his jaw becomes terse in that you’ve seen many times before. In an instant you know you’ve struck a nerve, and Jay doesn’t seem to be feeling in the mood for coddling you and your sensitivities. 

As if to confirm your thoughts he scoffs, looking away for a moment before turning back to you, fire in those green eyes that makes your heart thud nervously for what was about to be dished back to you. He steps forward, pointing an accusing finger that might as well have been a knife stuck into you.

“You’ve got guts, you know that? I didn’t split us up, Y/N, that wasn’t our fault but you let it be mine! I tried hard to be patient, to be understanding, I didn’t want to be someone else’s partner either. But you know what? This isn’t fucking high school, we’re adults, and you let it become something bigger than it had to be. I wasn’t the one who pulled away, Y/N, and I’ll be damned if I’m gonna stand here and be told that I don’t give a fuck about you when it couldn’t be further from the truth!” 

You stand in silence, nostrils flaring as you flounder for a fight, flight or forgive response. 

Lips pressed together, looking away as you kick at the loose stones on the sidewalk. “Well, that’s great to know, great to know that I could have been something to you this whole time, and now it’s tough shit because somebody else beat me to it.”

Jay scrubs a hand over his face, moving in one stride to tilt your chin and make you look at him, the hurt still laced with anger in his tone. “I never said I was with Hailey, and that’s because I’ve never been with Hailey! What do you want me to do, Y/N? What’s it gonna take to make you see? Why the hell do you think Voight split us in the first place, or did you forget how he treats partners who get too close? Did it ever occur to you that I didn’t fight him on it because it was the truth?”

He studies you and you study back, both of you are panting from the yelling and the adrenaline surging between you. You could see that he really was upset about everything you’d put him through, and you could feel the frustration with yourself bubbling over, you had put him through hell and for what? Your wounded pride had shown itself to be quite the problem.

When you don’t speak, Jay’s nostrils flare in dismay, shaking his head, “Say something, Y/N, I can’t-”

You’re done with talking, you’re done with dancing around it all, simply grasping Jay tightly by the collar of his jacket as you tug him those last few inches until your lips are pressed desperately to his, feeling him moan with what can only be described as a growl in his throat as he kisses back, hands gripping your waist roughly as he puts all of his energy into you.

The air outside is biting, but the heat of Jay so close to you is enough to make you forget. Your clutching fingers eventually relax to rest on his shoulders and neck, pulling back to look at him with wild and worried eyes.

You wait for the anger to remain, or for him to declare it “Too little too late”, but he doesn’t. Giving you the courage to speak as you see a smile start to grace his lips, “I’m sorry, Jay. I’m so sorry for everything.” 

Your thumb strokes the nape of his neck as you wait for a reaction, Jay’s hands are holding you securely, virtually pressed chest to chest in the middle of the sidewalk with the world still spinning around you. Illuminated by the streetlights and the glow of Molly’s as he studies your face.

He leans in, kissing you softer now, peppered kisses to your jaw and to your cheeks, “I appreciate you’re sorry, and I’m sorry too…but, Y/N, I don’t need you to be sorry anymore-” 

There’s a slight pause that makes your heart drop, maybe he was going to reject your apology and tell you that it wasn’t going to work. What if-

Jay’s quick to fill the pause and stop your anxiety dead in its tracks. “-I just need you to be mine, if that’s what you still want too.”

Your breath is caught, and your legs are jelly with the nerves and realisation that this was actually finally happening.

The sound of a door behind you is followed by Kim’s voice, “Are you guys good?” She tests, noticing quite smugly that you’re clutching at each other. 

“We’re good, Kim. Go away now, love you.” You holler, still looking at Jay in awe.

You hear Kim’s laugh and the sound of the door opening again, “Going away, love you too!” Hearing the door clunk shut as if it put you back in the safe bubble with Jay again.

“So?” Jay asks softly, waiting with bated breath. 

You swallow, nodding eagerly and unashamed of that eagerness. “I want to be yours, please. If that’s what you still want.” 

Jay chuckles, “It is, it really is.” He presses a kiss to your forehead, letting you fold into his embrace as you hold him tight, nestling your cheek against his chest. 

“Mhm, this is nice.” You remark, shivering in Jay’s arms. Jay snorts, “It is, but how about we do it in the warmth of my apartment? Or yours?” 

You hum in thought, “Yours sounds good, you still owe me a drink and takeout from our missed hangout last week.”

Jay’s eyebrows go up in a silent point being made, the reason you hadn’t met up was that you were busy sulking.

“Yeah yeah, I know, it’s my fault… But I'm still sad we missed it, your couch is bigger than mine. Takeout’s on me this time, might be some dessert in it for you.” You tease, letting that innuendo sit.

Jay nods with a grin, “Sounds like a good deal. Come on, let’s go home.” 

You reach for one of Jay’s hands, another silent squeeze of apology.

He holds your hand tight as you both cross the road to get to his truck, you had hitched a ride with Kevin and didn't have your car anyway.

You make a mental note to text the others later to apologise for bailing early and taking Jay with you. 

You were sure they wouldn’t mind, instead being thankful that the war was over between you, in favour of you both being annoyingly in love and mercifully quiet instead.

Fin. 

A/N: Whew, I hope the ending wasn't too lame! Here's to hopefully writing more stories to see the year out!

tags: @resanoona - @elius-learns-to-write - @dumb-fawkin-bitch - @enchantedblackrose

[seatsbythepit]

I love this so much! Stella would absolutely not be phased by the reader's mood, understanding completely the challenges of trusting new people. I am so here for Severide!Daughter and all that entails with Stellaride 😭🥺

she's alright, i guess

Pairing: Stellaride x SeverideDaughter!Reader

Requested: yes, by anon

Summary: Y/N hasn’t been very welcoming towards having Stella in their lives, but when she’s faced with a situation, Stella proves to Y/N that she’s in her corner.

Word Count: 2.2K+

Tags/Warnings: Dad!Kelly, mentions of attempted assault, single parent, victim shaming

A/N: This is a different kind of request/fic from what I've written for OC so far but I was pretty intrigued by it so I decided to give it a go. Not opening requests for daughter fics at the moment still because I’m not sure how this turned out yet so let me know what you guys think!

STELLARIDE MASTERLIST

You looked up from where you’d been playing with the food on your plate, only to catch Stella smile at your father who was sitting next to you.

Resisting the urge to make a face, you turned to look at him. “Can I be excused?”

Kelly gave a small sigh and turned to look at you, looking like he wanted to say something and then deciding against it, merely nodding. “Yeah, go on.”

You gave his girlfriend a last withering look before you took your plate back into the kitchen.

Kelly suppressed an audible sigh before he looked back at Stella. “Sorry.”

Stella smiled and shook her head. “She just needs some time.”

You rolled your eyes and headed back to your room, plopping yourself down on your bed and staring up at your ceiling.

It wasn’t really that you didn’t like Stella. Hell, you’d been okay with her before you found out she was dating your father.

As far as daughters went, you were sure that you were at least three times more protective over your father than your classmates were about their own parents.

Maybe it had something to do with the fact that you only ever had Kelly growing up. You’d overheard countless discussions about people telling him that it was hard being a single parent especially with his job but whatever anyone said, and however Kelly had felt from the first time he’d found out he’d had a daughter and come to get you, Kelly had stuck it out with you.

Over the years, especially once you were older, you’d seen many girlfriends come and go - some didn’t want commitment, some ran the moment they found out about you, some just… didn’t make it. It didn’t matter that Kelly had seemed fine with everything. You were not, so all that had done was make you even more protective over him.

So when you’d found out about Stella, you’d felt your hackles raise.

Logically, you knew Stella had done nothing to deserve this but your 15 year old brain couldn’t seem to override the emotion with logic.

You lay there for a while more until there was a knock on your door and Kelly poked his head in.

“Hey kiddo. Can we talk?”

You sat up but didn’t give him an answer because you knew very well what he wanted to talk about and you weren’t sure you wanted to hear it.

Kelly came in anyway, pulling out the chair at your desk and sitting across from you.

“Will you give Stella a break?”

You looked up with a look of protest and Kelly held up a hand.

“I know.” Kelly said in a low voice, giving you a small smile to show you he wasn’t mad. “Just lighten up a little and give her a chance. That’s all I’m asking.”

You didn’t say anything but Kelly let out a chuckle as you pursed your lips. “Go easy.”

He pressed a kiss to the top of your head before patting your hair affectionately and leaving the room.

You pulled your jacket tighter around you, glancing behind you.

You hadn’t meant to let it get so late but you’d gotten a little too immersed in your notes and lost track of time. Other than the wind blowing against your back and making you shiver, you hadn’t realized how quiet the road from your friend’s house was.

You kind of regretted not calling Kelly to come and get you, but you also didn’t relish the idea of waiting here so you’d forged on, telling yourself you’d walked this street thousands of times.

But now, you were pretty sure someone was following you, hearing the echoing footsteps behind you.

Damn it.

Your hands that were jammed into your pockets closed around your phone but you were also worried things would escalate so you picked up your pace instead.

You heard the footsteps behind you match the increase in your speed and just as you thought you should break into a run, you were yanked backwards and unable to maintain your balance, you tumbled onto the concrete pavement, feeling the concrete scrape against your skin.

Your head snapped upwards, feeling your heart fall straight into your gut when you looked back into the face of the man that now towered over you.

It was a stranger, not a face you remembered seeing, but his lips ticked upwards in a smile that flipped your stomach over and your gut feeling as well as every nerve in your body was screaming at you to get up and run.

Flight.

You scrambled to your feet, slowly moving backwards as he now stepped towards you. His movements had slowed, like a predator that had just cornered his prey.

He took another step towards you and with well chosen timing, you brought your knee up swiftly, just like how Kelly had taught you.

Winded, the man bent over but not before letting out a growl.

You didn’t stick around long enough to find out what he had to say, your legs already moving before your brain realized you were running.

The wind blowing against you was painful but you didn’t dare stop because you weren’t sure if he was on your heels.

You turned the corner, sparing a glance back and collided straight into someone.

“Sorry.” You panted, glancing up.

“Y/N?” Stella looked surprised to see you before her expression switched to one of concern. “What’s wrong?”

Stella glanced up at the empty street behind you and then looked back at you. “You okay?”

You really didn’t have the energy for anything else. You just really needed an adult. You glanced up at her without talking and Stella reached for your hand.

When you didn’t pull away, Stella squeezed. “Do you want me to take you home?”

You shook your head quickly. “No. Wait. I just… I don’t want Dad to see me like this.”

Stella studied you for just a second more before she nodded. “My apartment’s just around the corner. Why don’t you come and have something at my place and we can talk? If you want to.”

You hesitated for just a second but you were still kind of spooked so you nodded, letting her lead you back down from where she came from, not even realizing your hand was still in hers.

Stella wasn’t exaggerating when she said her apartment was around the corner.

Within five minutes, you were seated on Stella’s couch, a cup of hot tea in your hands while you found yourself telling her what happened.

It was weird - you’d expected Stella to maybe pat your shoulders a little to reassure you that things would be fine before trying to convince you to call Kelly so he could come and get you. She wouldn't be the first girlfriend to hand you back over to your father as soon as she could.

But the emotions on Stella’s face as you told her were new to you - looks of concern, before outrage and then… if you didn’t know any better, you’d think she was upset.

You fell quiet after a while and Stella scooted a little closer to you.

“Alright, Y/N, listen.” Stella said and you looked up at her. “We have to report this.”

You looked back down again, your index fingers twirling together even though you were still holding the mug.

“I’ll come with you.” Stella paused. “If you’ll let me.”

You looked up again and nodded quietly. "You… You’d do that?”

You registered a look of surprise on Stella’s face before she next spoke. “Of course, Y/N.”

“Can we not call my dad yet?”

There was a small silence and you held back a sigh. You knew what would happen if your father found out about this. Other than the fact that you hated making him worry and that you knew things might get blown up out of proportion with practically everyone getting involved, it was kind of awkward talking to him about some stuff.

Stella glanced at you. “How about we take things one step at a time?”

You bit your lip and Stella nodded encouragingly at you. “Let’s go to the district and then when you’re ready, we can call Kelly alright?”

You nodded quietly, taking another sip of tea before Stella smiled. “Ready?”

You got up and Stella grabbed an extra coat off her coat hanger, draping it around your shoulders.

Stella had been told to wait outside while you gave your statement to the uniformed police officer sitting across from you but you were regretting this with each question the officer asked you.

“What were you doing out so late?”

“Is this what you normally wear to school?

You were done with the insinuations in his voice and tone. You were 15, not an idiot. You knew exactly where this was going and you’d been around your father’s friends long enough to pick some stuff up.

You stood all of a sudden, the nails digging into your palms in an effort not to let the angry tears out. “I’m not answering any more questions.”

“What do you…”

You didn’t let him finish his sentence, opening the door and stalking out.

As promised, Stella was right outside, glancing up as you walked out, reading the expression on your face instantly.

“You okay?”

You pulled Stella’s jacket tighter around yourself. “I just want to go home.”

Stella frowned, glancing up at the officer that was now outside the room as well. “You still have to answer a few questions. You can’t just…”

You didn’t move and Stella looked back down at you. “Y/N?”

“He hasn’t asked me a single question about what happened.” You said in a low voice, focusing only on Stella now. “No questions about how the man looked, what street this took place on, how he sounded.”

Stella frowned. Those were enough for her to put together a few pieces of the puzzle.

“Those are necessary questions. We need to know if…”

“Kidd. Y/N.”

You glanced up at a familiar face and Stella patted your back. “Told you I got you.” She whispered in a low voice so only you could hear.

Stella nodded with a smile at Hailey.

Telling the officer she’d take over, Hailey led you back into the room and smiled encouragingly at you.

“Stella called me. Will you tell me what happened?”

It was easier than you’d expected to talk to Hailey but even as you told her what happen, you found yourself internally steeling yourself for a lecture of some sort and you suddenly just really wished Kelly was here.

But Hailey offered no lecture or talking-to. Instead, she treated you like an adult, taking down the information you offered, her questions only revolving around important information she obviously needed, before she closed the book.

“Thank you, Y/N. Here.” Hailey handed you a small bottle and a small device. “Pepper spray and a small panic button.”

You looked up a little surprised and Hailey smiled. “If nothing, maybe it’ll help you feel safer.”

You nodded, keeping the things she handed you and Hailey came around and squeezed your shoulder before taking you out of the room again where Stella was waiting.

“Dad must be worried, I…”

Stella shook her head with a smile. “I told him you’re with me so he wouldn’t. I can call him if you’re ready.”

You felt involuntary tears well up in your eyes before you nodded. "Can you? I... I think I really need him."

Kelly was here in record time, running up the steps of the district as if he’d been waiting nearby in the first place but you didn’t care. The rush of relief and safety when you saw him made you wonder why you hadn’t gone to him immediately anyway.

“Y/N!”

You didn’t say anything, merely shooting off your seat to dive into your father’s arms like you were a child once again.

“You okay? Let me see.” Kelly pulled away just a little to look at you but other than remnants of the startled look in your eyes and new tears ready to spill over, you weren’t really hurt.

Kelly gently pulled you back into his arms and exhaled. “Thank god.”

He was never one for long verbal communications of how much he loved you but you didn’t really need him to tell you. This was even more apparent now as you were huddled in your father’s arms in the middle of a police district.

“You must be starving.” Kelly said after a while, looking down at you to wipe a stray tear off your face. “Why don’t we go get something to eat, hmm?”

You gave a small crooked smile and Kelly looked up, meeting Stella’s eyes.

“I’ll call you tomorrow.” Kelly said with a small apologetic smile at Stella. “Thank you.”

Stella nodded, but you interrupted them. “You’re not coming to eat with us?”

Kelly raised his eyebrows.

“Thought I’d give you two some private time.” Stella said, although she seemed to be weighing the look in your eyes now.

You shrugged. “You can come eat with us, too.”

Kelly glanced between his girlfriend and daughter. “Did something happen?”

You shrugged, lowering your voice. “She’s alright I guess.”

Kelly chuckled, swinging an arm around your shoulders as he led you out of the district. Stella fell into step on your other side and you smiled up at her. “Thank you.” You whispered, fully aware your father could hear you.

Stella smiled. “Thank you, too.”

Kelly just smiled at both his girls as the three of you walked down the empty streets. Together.

THANK YOU FOR READING!! PLEASE TELL ME WHAT YOU THOUGHT OF THIS!!

If you want to support me, buy me a coffee!

[valentinajadehill]

one chicago masterlist

jay, adam, kevin

admirer central o

adam ruzek

memory lane o

jay halstead

crossing lines o

jealousy jealousy o

leap of faith o

showtime part one, part two, part three

only mine o

back off o

bullpen chatter o

work related encounters o

jesse lee soffer

new romance o

closer than most o

connor rhodes

come back to me o

ethan choi

secret relationship o

attention o

nerf gun war o

the toothbrush o

antonio dawson

hug me o

nurse dawson at your service o

i tried to help o

fight me o

strip

will halstead

medicinal purposes o

kelly severide

resanoona masterlist

give into you o

second chances part one, part two, part three, part four, part five

the way home masterlist

[hereforhalstead]

Before a night out with Jay would include:

GIF NOT MINE, FULL CREDITS TO THE OWNER

Requested?: Nope!

Warnings: N/A

Let me know if you want the next part of what happens when you’re on the night out, enjoy!

*****

- was it even a night out if you didn’t spend the whole day dwelling on what you were going to wear?

- you’d grab a simple black dress out of the closet, staring at your reflection in the mirror as all of your insecurities scream back at you

- Jay would run a hand along your back effortlessly as he walks past, unaware of your inner demons rattling through your head

- ‘look at you’ he mumbles, pressing a kiss to the crook of your neck before grabbing a towel and tossing it over his shoulder

- you force a smile, watching as he circles back to you. His hand falling to innately rest on your hips as he pulls your hair to one side, exposing your shoulder for him to drop a soft kiss to your skin

- ‘what’s going on?‘ he didn’t expect an answer, just continued to reassure and plant delicate kisses along your arm to hope you see yourself the way he sees you

- ‘get in the shower, we’re gonna be late’ you lightly push back against his chest, feeling it vibrate in a huff of laughter as he presses one last kiss just below your ear, letting it linger slightly as he inhales your fresh scent

- ‘yes ma’am’ he marches off ‘can always join me if you want?’ He throws you a wink that you chuckle and roll your eyes at before tossing the towel at him that he had thrown on the bed just a few moments earlier

- you stood in the kitchen, anxiously tapping your foot as you sipped on your drink, you hated to be late and Jay always kept it close to the mark

- ‘waiting for you’ he remarks, smirk pulling on his lips as he tugs his jacket from the hook

- ‘you’re worse than a woman, Jay’ you throw the rest of your drink down the sink before joining him by the door, putting the last minute essentials in your bag

- he opens the door, ushering for you to exit first and then locking up. Naturally slinging his arm over your shoulders as he hums in amusement ‘gotta look good for my girl’

****

TAG LIST

@musicismyescape27 • @i-like-sparkly-things • @stephanie708 • @upsteadlovingheart • @nevaehstreater18 • @kellykidd • @secondaryjob • @youngblood199456 • @soph0864 • @13shadesofanni i • @shikshinkwon • @mrspeacem1nusone • @slytherinambitious • @loki-halstead • @morganupstead • @moni-serrano11 • @sophiatellerrhodes • @dedlund82 • @jay-girl-stilnski ski • @jaiboomer11 • @euphoria257 • @lolalee24 • @vamp-army • @lookatme-23 • @lucyysthings • @ephemeral3 • @waywardhunter95 • @panaitbeatrice • @atarmychick007 • @drakelover78 • @resanoona •

[writercole]

A Guardian Angel and Her Knight

Summary: Jake finally meets his match.

Words: 3700ish

Warnings: Fights, blood, unknown collapse (not an MC), toxic masculinity, Jake to the rescue

Credits: I did it all, unbeta’d.

A/N: Happy 2023, guys. We did it. We lived another effing year. We outlived the queen. Maybe we’ll be fortunate enough to outlive the king. And the human cheeto. ANYWAY - here’s the first fic of the year. It’s a 5 + 1 for @resanoona ’s challenge. Five times she shot Jake down and one time she didn’t.

The new batch of recruits were a rowdy bunch, always looking to prove their worth. Penny started to have so many bar fights and injuries that she hired an EMT on the weekends. She knew her Dagger kids would handle the security part of it if she needed. And she always threw a drink or two on the house for their troubles. 

Tonight was the first night the EMT was on duty, sitting at the bar quietly sipping a soda between conversations with Penny. 

“I said, leave me alone,” a female voice carried over the noise.

“Don’t be like that, baby,” a male voice replied.

Penny raised her hand to the aviators hanging out in the corner and signaled for her EMT to be ready. 

“Hey, man, time to go,” a blond man said as he approached the drunken harasser, putting a hand on his shoulder to make sure he was understood. 

“I ain’t done,” the drunk replied, shoving the hand off of his shoulder and turning back to the woman who was cowering away from him. “Why do you have to be such a bitch?” he growled.

“Coyote,” the blond called, his demeanor immediately shifting to a more defensive stance.

“On it,” his friend nodded and grabbed the drunk’s wrist. “I believe the lady doesn’t want to talk right now.”

The drunk tried to lift his arm, held firmly down by the bigger man’s grip. Instead of relenting, the drunk threw his other elbow back, catching the blond off guard, smashing into his nose.

“Seresin, you good?” the one called Coyote asked as his friend pinched his nose and blinked rapidly.

“Oh, I’m good, Machado,” he sneered as he stared at the drunk. “I’m very good.” 

Without warning, Seresin spun the drunk around, throwing two jabs to his nose before landing a right hook to his jaw, the drunk falling slack against Coyote.

“Coyote, Hangman,” Penny yelled across the crowd that had gathered. The men looked up and she pointed outside and then at an empty pair of seats at the bar.

They nodded in understanding and tossed the man out the front door, sliding into the two seats with fresh beers, not noticing the medical bag next to them.

“Okay Coyote, any injuries?” they heard from the side. Both men turned their heads to see a woman in an SDFD EMT tee shirt opening a bag of gloves.

“He didn’t hit me at all but he must have been contagious because I swear I’m looking at an angel right now,” Coyote drawled, sipping from his beer as he eyed her.

“Easy, sailor,” she chuckled. 

“Oh no, sweetheart, I’m not a sailor,” he grinned, a million dollar smile that would have made her melt if she weren’t so focused on her job. “I’m a pilot. But you can just call me Javy.”

“Well, Javy, since you’re okay, can I take a look at your partner in crime?”

Javy turned to look at his friend and swore under his breath. He had a trickle of blood dripping from his lip and bruising forming around the bridge of his nose. Javy stepped behind his friend, letting the new EMT do her job.

“Alright, flyboy,” she smirked as she stepped in front of the blond, “tell me if anything hurts besides your nose.”

“It’s a little hard to breathe,” he replied, his eyes dancing across her face as she cleaned up the blood on his lip.

“Did he catch you anywhere on your chest or throat? Any history of heart problems, anxiety, panic attacks?”

“No, just my nose,” he denied, a smirk etched on his lips matching hers. “It’s only when I look at you that I can’t breathe.”

She rolled her eyes and pinched the cartilage between the bottom lashes of his eyes, eliciting a groan that made his smirk drop.

“Well, it’s not broken. Probably be sore and bruised for a couple of days. Just ice it and you’ll be fine, flyboy.”

“If you’re going to call me a name, call me Hangman.”

“Hangman,” he corrected as she turned to pack away her bag.

“Excuse me?”

“Your parents must have wanted you to go into executions. I think I’ll pass, thanks though,” she shrugged as she shifted her bag to the stool.

“Seresin, stop harassing my EMT,” Penny demanded as she set a round of beers in front of them. “On the house if you keep your mouth shut.”

“Yes ma’am,” Hangman nodded, Javy agreeing, both of them picking up their drinks.

“Stay out of trouble, boys,” the EMT called as they turned to walk away.

“Aren’t you going to tell us your name, angel?” Javy flirted, stopping a few steps from their normal position at the pool tables.

“Not tonight.”

“So you really didn’t tell them your name?” Dawson asked her partner as they pulled up to the scene of a call. 

“No!” her partner laughed, “they insisted on calling me ‘angel’ for the rest of the weekend, too.”

They were laughing as they pulled their bags out of the ambulance, heading towards the flashing red and blue lights of the police cars. 

“Well if it isn’t my healer,” a voice drawled from next to the cop car.

The two women paused and looked over, finding a blond man leaning against the unit, smirking.

“Friend of yours?” Dawson teased with a nudge.

“Something like that,” she chuckled. “Executioner, what have you gotten yourself into this time?”

“That’s Hangman, darlin,” he corrected, grimacing when he tried to flash his award-winning smile.

“I bet you say that to all the girls,” she flirted, batting her eyelashes at him. “Can I take him, officer?”

“Yeah, I’m done for now,” the officer acknowledged. “Stay available, sir.”

“Thanks. Alright, Executioner. Let’s get you cleaned up.” 

“If you won’t call me Hangman, how about Jake?” he offered as he stood.

“Nah, I like Executioner,” she smirked, walking towards the ambulance, ignoring the feeling of eyes on her, shaking her head and rolling her eyes at the knowledge that it was her partner watching closely. “Sit. Lemme look,” she sighed, gesturing to the space on the bumper.

As he sat, she maneuvered between his knees, tipping his head backwards to get a good view of the wounds on his face.

“Are you going to tell me your name tonight?” he asked while she cleaned the blood from his cheek, hissing when she passed over an open cut.

“That depends,” she replied, her gaze unwavering from her task, “why do you want to know so bad?”

“I need to know what I’m saving your number under when you give it to me.” The uninjured corner of his mouth quirked up as he awaited her response.

She rolled her eyes and swiped a fresh alcohol pad across his split lip, grinning in the pained groan she received until she felt his hands tighten on her hips.

“Easy with that,” he sassed, “I’m an injured knight.”

“Is that how you got beat up once again? Being a knight for another distressed damsel?” she asked, a light smile upon her face.

“Mugger,” he answered simply, his fingertips digging into her hips once again at the stinging burn of an alcohol pad.

“And yet here you are, no better than he, holding onto my hips for dear life,” she bit back, her eyebrows quirked at his confidence.

“I’m sorry, is this distracting you?” he teased, squeezing once more.

“Not as much as the bravery you’re showing by touching a woman without her permission in front of two police officers,” she shrugged briefly, eyeing him curiously as she awaited his next move.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to cross a line or something. It was just a reflex,” he rushed out, letting his hands drop to his sides again.

“Well, since you did stop a mugging, I can let it go this time. You’re all done,” she told him as she stepped out of his space.

“I’m done? No stitches, no hospital?”

“No stitches, no hospital,” she repeated as she cleaned up her supplies. “Stay out of trouble, Executioner.”

“Correcting you again would do nothing, right?” he deadpanned, a mischievous twinkle making his tired eyes a little brighter.

���Not tonight,” she grinned before shutting the back doors of the ambulance and climbing in the passenger seat.

Dawson eyed her curiously, a smirk playing on her lips. “He was hot, girl.”

“Mhmm” was the only reply she got.

After a grueling 48 hour shift and very little sleep, she found herself leaning on the bar, fighting to keep her eyes open. The Hard Deck was quiet for a change, just a few sailors and pilots relaxing. She was grateful for the break but she also kind of wanted some excitement, something to keep her awake for the next few hours.

Her eyes had drifted closed during the silent moment, popping open when someone cleared their throat next to her.

“I don’t think you should be sleeping on the job, darlin. What if someone passes out.”

She sighed as she sat up straight, finding the annoying blond pilot that somehow ended up in the same place that she was. “It has been a long week, Executioner,” she groaned, “I’m too tired for your shit.”

“I could wake you up. Got a fool-proof method right here,” he smirked, gesturing to his crotch.

The sound of a bell ringing saved her from answering and made Jake drop his head, fully aware that Penny had heard him.

“Seresin, I told you to leave my EMT alone,” chastised Penny. “Maybe buying a round will remind you how to speak to a lady, too.”

“Sorry, Penny,” he mumbled, his cheeks and ears bright red. “I’ll, uh, I’m just going…good night.”

It took everything she had to keep her composure.

She had finally gotten some rest before a shift at the bar and was happily chatting with Penny when a ruckus from the pool tables drew their attention. They both looked up in time to see Jake push Phoenix out of he way and swing at a man at least six inches taller than him. The man swung back and then swept Jake’s feet from under him.

“Shit!” they both yelled as they scrambled to the fight.

Jake had fallen backwards and hit his head on the edge of a table, collapsing in a heap on the wooden floor. Phoenix and Bob were crouched next to him while Payback, Javy, and Mickey strained to hold the man back.

“Bob, I need you to get some ice and a cold rag,” she instructed, “and Natasha, please go to my car and get the duffel out of the back seat. It’s unlocked.”

“I saw him fall backwards,” Javy explained as he struggled against the guy he was holding. “I think he hit the back of his head.”

“Thanks, Javy,” she called over her shoulder as she checked the back of Jake’s head. She swore when her fingers found a wet spot behind his ear, pulling it back to see blood on her fingertips. Phoenix dropped the duffel next to her as Bob arrived with the ice and rag.

Jake started to stir as she put her gloves on, breathing a sigh of relief when his eyes focused on her.

“What happened?” he muttered as he tried to sit up, stopping when she laid her hand on his chest.

“Guy grabbed my ass and wouldn’t back off,” Natasha explained, “you squared up and got swept into a table.”

“And you need to relax until I make sure you don’t have a concussion, Jake.”

“You called me Jake,” he noted with a soft smile.

“I did,” she confirmed as she checked his pupil reactivity. “Do you know what I usually call you?”

“Executioner,” he answered with a soft sigh. “Because it’s synonymous with Hangman. You said my parents must’ve hated me.”

“I did,” she chuckled.

“And you still haven’t told me your name. I guess I’m going to have to call you my guardian angel,” he smirked.

“Okay, Executioner. That’s enough. Do you think you can sit up?”

Jake slowly rose to a seated position, the crowd around him clapping as he stood, bracing himself on Bob’s shoulder. He swayed a bit and reached out to stabilize with the back of a chair.

“Seresin, you alright?” Bob asked.

“Yeah,” Jake replied, “yeah, a little dizzy.”

“You also have a cut I need to check. Penny’s office.” She grabbed her duffel and followed behind Bob and Jake.

He was silent as she bandaged the cut, almost deep enough to need a stitch. His eyes were focused on the mirror reflecting her working. He made the decision that he had been pushing too hard and that he’d back off, letting her do her job in peace and not try to get the attention of someone who was uninterested.

“Okay, just take it easy until tomorrow and you should be fine,” she chirped, taking her gloves off and collecting her supplies.

“Uh, thanks,” he mumbled. “Listen, I know I can come on a bit strong sometimes and I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable.”

“While I agree with you coming on a little strong, I was far from uncomfortable. Hell, you weren’t the worst guy I’ve had this year, much less ever.”

“Still, my momma would be appalled. She raised me better than that,” Jake admitted, ducking his head.

“Your momma?” she repeated, turning around with a smirk. “Are you a good ol’ country boy, Jake?”

He chuckled at her teasing, raising his gaze to her, “yes ma’am. Texas born and bred.”

“A true southern gentleman,” she smiled softly. “I’ll tell you what, Jake. I’ll forget all about the past if you promise to stop getting into trouble.”

He returned her smile, dimples popping and eyes crinkling. “Deal. But I’m still calling you my guardian angel.”

“Or you can call me by name.”

Jake was so surprised that he didn’t hear the first time she told him, and the second time, he swore her name was perfect. A perfect name for an angel.

“Possible heart attack,” Dawson relayed as she and her partner navigated the restaurant, heading towards the crowd gathered around.

“At least you aren’t my guardian angel tonight,” Jake smirked from the floor when the EMTs reached the center of the chaos.

“Jake, what happened?” she asked, kneeling next to the man who had become a friend.

“He collapsed on the floor when he was on his way back from the restroom. I started compressions and my date called 911,” he explained as he backed away, letting the paramedics take their spots.

“No medical bracelet, erratic pulse. Dawson, get the defib ready. Something feels wrong,” she detailed to her partner.

They got the man loaded up quickly. When she turned around after slamming the door shut, she was met with Jake standing with his hands in his pockets and a redhead looking on with arms folded across her chest and a scowl on her face.

“Is, uh, is he gonna be okay?” Jake questioned as his gaze wandered to the ambulance doors.

“I don’t know. Something feels weird about this case,” she answered, glancing over Jake’s shoulder. “You should go. Jessica Rabbit looks pissed.”

She turned and climbed into the passenger seat, signaling for Dawson to go, leaving Jake standing in the parking lot with a suspicious and angry date.

Jake was acutely aware of the presence of the woman he called his guardian angel. She must have been off duty because she was sitting with another woman, one he recognized as her ambulance partner, and having a beer. The two of them were talking and laughing, occasionally including Penny in their conversations.

He tried to keep his distance, to forget about her being there and enjoy the night with his friends but his eyes wandered over to her every few minutes. He was aware of the fact that she had worked her way under his skin effortlessly, embedding herself in his thoughts. He also knew that while they were friendly, she really hadn’t shown much interest in him.

Jake glanced up from his game of pool to see Dawson sitting by herself, deep in conversation with Penny. He scanned the bar, not finding the woman he was searching for among the crowd. Before he could jump to any conclusions, he heard his name being called.

“Jake!” Nat yelled from across the pool table, pointing behind him.

He spun around to find his friend maneuvering through the bar, a frazzled look on her face and a man on her heels.

“Phoenix, get Penny,” he demanded as he set down his pool stick and marched towards them.

“I said I’m not interested,” he heard her say.

“Oh come on, sweetheart. You know you want me,” her pursuer sneered.

“I said -”

“There you are, angel,” Jake interrupted, a megawatt smile gracing his lips. “Was starting to wonder where you had disappeared to.”

A look of relief flooded her features as she spied Jake walking through the tables towards her. She slipped her arms around him and pressed a soft kiss to his lips. A shock shot through her lips the moment they met his, surprising her to her core.

Jake was unfazed, his arm wrapping around her as he played along.

“My bad, man,” the pursuer said, his hands up in surrender, “I didn’t know she had a boyfriend.”

“She shouldn’t have to have a boyfriend. She said she wasn’t interested. You should have taken the hint,” Jake snarled.

The sound of a bell ringing echoed through the busy bar followed by loud cheers. Jake kept his eyes on the man, a smug smirk fixed on his lips while his arm tightened protectively around her waist, keeping her back towards the man as Omaha and Harvard escorted him out.

“You okay?” Jake asked as he pulled back, his gentle gaze searching her face for any indication that she was hurt.

“Yeah, yeah I’m -” she sighed, “I’m good.”

“Let me know if you need me again tonight,” he told her, releasing her from his grasp. 

“Actually, Jake, could we, maybe…talk? Outside?”

“Sure. Anything for my guardian angel.” He offered his arm to her and led her to the back porch.

“About that kiss,” she started, halting when Jake held up his hand.

“Trust me, darlin, there’s nothing to apologize for or feel awkward about,” he assured her.

“Even if I want to do it again?”

Jake’s jaw dropped and his hand fell back to his side. “I’m sorry, angel, you’re going to have to repeat that.”

“I know I’ve spent the last few weeks turning you down. I know it’s crazy. But you really do seem like a great, honest guy and when I kissed you,” she rambled, pausing to suck in a deep breath, “I felt something. And it could be nothing -”

She was cut off by Jake’s lips pressing against hers, his hands cupping her face. His lips moved against hers and her eyes fluttered shut, sighing contentedly when his tongue swept over her bottom lip.

He pulled back slowly, leaving his hands holding her face. Their lips were centimeters apart, shallow breaths mingling in the restricted space between his wrists. Jake’s eyes stayed shut for several seconds, savoring the moment.

“Wow,” he whispered as he opened his eyes, watching her lashes flutter.

“I -” she started, her voice barely audible as she searched the eyes of the man who, moments ago, became her personal knight in shining armor.

“So does this mean you’re giving me a chance?” His signature smirk was back on his lips as he let his hands drop.

“That depends,” she replied, looking up at him doe-eyed and fluttering her lashes, “am I giving my knight in shining armor Jake a chance or am I giving the royal pain in my ass Executioner a chance?”

“Darlin, for you, Executioner is dead and buried.”

“Then yes. I’m off tomorrow, too.”

“I will pick you up at seven.” Jake kissed her cheek and walked backwards towards the parking lot, a wide smile on his face.

“Hey Jake?” she called as he reached his truck.

“Yeah?”

“Why not tonight?”

A cocky smile flashed across his face before disappearing, being replaced with a softer, more genuine one. “You’re giving Jake a chance, not Hangman. Jake’s a gentleman, he wants to do things the right way.”

“And how is he going to find where I live? He doesn’t have my address or phone number.”

Jake chuckled as he took a step back. “You are going to go back inside and finish your night with your friend. And if you really want me to pick you up at seven, you can text me in the morning.”

“But how -”

“Trust me,” he insisted as he climbed into his truck and backed out of the lot.

She walked back inside in a daze, confusion written all over face. Siding into her spot next to Dawson, she reviewed the events that had transpired earlier in the evening. A hand waving in front of her face broke her from her trance.

“Where were you just now?” Dawson questioned playfully, a knowing smirk dancing on her lips.

“He’s not what I expected,” she muttered as she leaned on her hand.

“Hangman is a jackass, but Jake…he’s a good man,” the brunette pilot, Natasha, confirmed from beside Dawson. “You have no idea how much it pains me to say nice things about him, either. He’s a thorn in my side at work but every time I’ve been in trouble on the ground, he’s had my back.”

Jake slid between the sheets of his bed just past midnight, hoping for a few hours of sleep. As soon as his eyes closed, his phone lit up. Checking it, he found an unsaved number had sent him a few digits and a street name.

Jake counted his lucky stars and resigned himself to skipping the gym and sleeping in. He had a date to plan, after all.

[storiesofsvu]

Learn to Share

Emily Prentiss x reader warnings: language, alcohol consumption, smut, dirty talk, some dom/sub dynamics, nothing too crazy this time lol. Covers the "only one bed" square for xmas bingo and the "forced proximity" for @resanoona 3k bingo! Also covers a prompt requested by anon.

It was honestly a miracle that the BAU had managed to not only wrap their last case, but get home, finalize paperwork and have nothing else come up before Christmas Eve. Everyone was beyond thankful for that since it was the night of the annual Christmas at Rossi’s party, nothing too fancy, or too huge, usually just the team and any respective partners that wanted to come maybe a few extra agents or assistants that helped them out majorly through the year. The evening was full of laughter, amazing food, fancy wines, expensive bourbons and an all around sense of family and quality relaxation time.

Once dinner was finished, dishes were left for the morning and the party would end up spreading its way through the house. There were often cigars being smoked out back, Dave wandering through the rooms showing off any new fancy things he’d collected over the year or telling stories of his wild days. As the night wore on and the candles began to burn low the crowd would begin to dwindle, people slipping off into the night after a quiet goodbye and Merry Christmas, knowing they had family to see early the next morning. Eventually it was only Dave, Spencer, Tara, you and Emily left in the living room, fresh glasses of wine poured, alcohol flowing through your veins, keeping you warm and relaxed, helping everyone let go a little bit more than normal. Dave always extended the offer from dinner to everyone able to stay overnight, considering just how much alcohol he had provided it was the smart choice. Spencer was tipsily rambling on about one theory or another, pulling laughter from the girls as Rossi drained his glass, letting out a small groan as he stood from the couch.

“It’s late. You kids know where the guest rooms are.”

There was a chorus of goodnights as he reminded everyone they were more than welcome to stay as long as they wanted and breakfast would be available in the morning before he disappeared down the hall. Spencer’s theory finally wrapped up a bit later and Tara finished her drink, moving to put her wine glass in the sink.

“Where do you think you’re going?” Emily protested with a laugh and Tara chuckled.

“There’s four of us and only three rooms, I just bunked with Reid all week, it’s not happening again tonight. Besides, you two had private suites, learn to share.” She teased.

Emily let out a mock offended scoff as Spencer tried to object and you laughed rolling your eyes at Tara as she flashed the group a smile and a wave along with good night. It didn’t take much longer before you were yawning, doing your best not to lean into Emily’s shoulder as you finished your drink.

“Guys…” you started, “never thought I’d be this person, but I think it’s bedtime for me.” You sat up stretching your body out with a soft groan, “see you in the morning.” You shot Emily a lingering look as you moved from the couch, your glass finding home on the kitchen island before you wandered down the hall.

You would forever and always be thankful for Rossi and his level of hospitality extending beyond anyone you’d ever experienced. There were unopened toothbrush packages and makeup wipes in the en suite you were able to help yourself to, along with some cozy clothes stashed in the guest room’s closet. You simply tugged down a comfy cotton t-shirt, pulling it over your bare body before plugging in your phone and letting out a happy sigh as you shifted under the covers.

You weren’t surprised at the small murmur of voices in the hallway before the light flicked off, the sound of the other guest room door clicking shut and the door to your guest room opened, Emily slipping through it with a grin on her face, the soft lamplight washing her in a golden glow.

“You coming for a sleepover?” You greeted with a grin and she laughed quietly.

“You heard Tara.” Her hands moved to her shirt, sliding down the buttons she undid them, “apparently it’s our turn to share.”

“If only they knew just how much sharing we had done this week.” You purred, sitting up as you shifted onto your knees and Emily chuckled.

“Are you gonna be quiet this time?” She raised a brow, beginning to crawl up the bed, “because I’ll only touch you if you’re quiet…. I don’t want you to risk waking anyone up again.”

“I’ll be good.” Your breath caught in your throat, “I promise…”

“Good.” One of her hands wrapped around the back of your head, pulling her to you, her lips brushing against yours when she spoke, “such a shame there’s only one bed.”

“It is a king… could build a wall of pillows?” You offered with a grin and Emily chuckled, her breath warm on your skin.

“I was thinking we could take advantage of it….”

“Hmm… I do like the sound of that better.” You barely had moment to let out a huff of a laugh before Emily’s lips were on you. Your hands fell to her bare waist, wrapping around her and pulling her body tight to you while her hand wove into your hair.

The kiss built up, starting slow, a familiar dance between all too familiar lips until Emily’s tongue slid across the seam of your lips, her teeth nipping into your lower lip and you groaned. She took the opportunity to sink her tongue into your mouth, exploring every inch of you she could while her free hand started to toy with the hem of the shirt you had on. Your hands drifted upward, swiftly un doing her bra and she tossed it to the floor before her hands tickled up your bare thighs, tugging at the hem of your shirt. The kiss broke long enough for her to pull the garment over your head and it joined the growing pile on the floor.

“So fucking gorgeous.” She cooed, nudging you backwards towards the pillows, “lie back for me baby.”

You did as she asked, getting comfortable on the bed as she stepped off it to rid herself of the rest of her clothing, smirking at the way your eyes lingered on her body as if you were trying to memorize every inch. A hand on the mattress she settled over you, lips meeting yours again, this kiss deeper than the last while her hand snuck between your legs. The tips of her fingers began to play with your pussy, trailing through them feather light, teasing you, leaving you whining for more.

“Quiet…” she warned, “can’t have us getting caught…”

“Sorry M’am.” You murmured in return as Emily kissed across your jaw, her lips trailing down your neck, teeth scratching at your skin ever so lightly until she bit deeply into your pulse point and your hand flew to your mouth to muffle the gasp escaping your lips.

“That’s my good girl.” Her lips curved into a grin against your skin as they trailed across your body, her tongue swiping across your collarbone before her lips wrapped around a nipple, sucking it into her mouth while her tongue flicked across it. Her finger tips continuing to tease you, the heel of her hand randomly pressing against your clit as your hips rocked upwards in need of more.

She sunk lower on your body, lips leaving little kisses and love bites on your hips and thighs until she was settled between your legs. Her hand ran up your cunt, smearing wetness across it while her fingers widened, spreading you open for her and you let out a breathy sigh. It was only a moment later her mouth was on you, kissing at your folds, tongue slipping as deep into as you could and you bit back a moan, your fingers clenching into the bedspread. Emily continued to eagerly lap at your pussy, groaning into it, the vibrations pulling quiet whimpers from you as she buried herself between your legs. You were doing your absolute best to keep quiet, knowing just how easy it would be to be overheard by any of the others. But when Emily’s hand snuck up to join her mouth, her lips shifted up wrapping around your clit and she sucked, hard and you weren’t expecting it.

“Oh fuck!” The moan left your lips before you even realized and even faster Emily’s hand and mouth left your cunt, instead, her teeth quickly and sharply bit into your thigh, “oww!” You hissed in a whisper and she raised an unimpressed brow in your direction when she looked up at you. “That hurt!”

“And you had one rule sweetheart.” She husked back, “shame I can’t spank you, that certainly would call attention to what we were up to. Guess you’ll have to get that punishment tomorrow night. Now…another outburst like that and I’m shoving your panties in that dirty little mouth of yours, understood?”

“Yes ma’am…” your breath caught in your throat, hitching when her mouth returned to your pussy, slowly licking through you before gently wrapping around your clit once more. You tugged your lip into your teeth, holding back any noises aside from quiet whimpers as Emily’s fingers sunk into your pussy. She let out a quiet groan at the feeling of you tightly wrapping around her, how wet you already were, juices slicking her fingers within seconds. She twisted and curled them within you until she found that sensitive spot and your hips jolted up off the bed, a soft gasp leaving your lips and she smirked against your body.

“Right there?” She murmured, pressing on the spot again and you nodded, eyes tightly scrunching shut, “you like it when I touch you here?”

“Oh god Em!” It was barely above a whisper, a shuddering breath following it as she continued to brush against the spot, chuckling softly before her mouth returned to your swollen nub.

Her lips wrapped around it, sucking it into her mouth while her tongue flicked patterns against it, harder and faster until you were trembling under her. Her fingers worked in tandem, feeling the way your cunt began to flutter around her, your clit pulsing in her mouth in the same rhythm. Fire was burning through you, your body shivering with each touch of Emily’s fingers or mouth, each pass of either bringing you more and more pleasure. You let out a muffled cry when the fire broke the surface, biting down so hard on your lip you swore you’d broken the skin. Emily’s lips slipped from your clit when you orgasm hit, watching the way your juices lightly dribbled out of you, leaking down her wrist as your body shook on the bed.

“That’s my good girl… so pretty…” She praised before her fingers slipped out of you and she delicately licked around your pussy, cleaning up the smeared juices before she crawled back over you, straddling your hips and she extended her slicked fingers to you. You eagerly accepted them into your mouth, lips wrapping around them as you sucked them clean. “Taste so good sweetheart, thought I should share.”

“Thank you.” You breathed out and she chuckled at the way you dropped back against the pillows.

“Oh I’m not done. I know you can handle another one.” She sat up on her knees, shifting lower on your body as she swatted at your hip, “roll over.”

You did as she asked and she grasped at your hips, pulling you up on your knees while your head remained buried the pillows. Her knee nudged at your leg, shoving yours further apart so she was able to settle between them, a hand running up your back, pressing you into the pillows and you let out a quiet groan. Her free hand trailed up the inside of your leg, fingers brushing through your still dripping pussy before her thumb sunk in as deep as it could and moaned softly into the pillows. Your hips began to rock back onto her hand, fucking yourself on her digits as you moved and she leant over you, pressing a kiss to the small of your back.

“That’s my good girl.” Her fingers pinched your clit before they swapped places with her thumb, sinking deep into your cunt. With each thrust of her hand her hips rocked forward, body meeting yours as your hips thrusted back, eager for more, for her fingers to find that spot within you again. “Just like that… you keep fucking yourself on my fingers alright sweetheart?”

“Need more…” you whined softly and she huffed a laugh out, fingers curling within you as she picked up the pace, her body rocking into yours with more force, fingers moving faster and going as deep as they could into your wetness.

“I guess you’ve been good enough for a bit of a reward.” She purred, her free hand moving from your hip to the bag you hadn’t even noticed her bring into the room.

Your head dropped onto your arms, chest beginning to heave as your cunt fluttered around her fingers, your body burned, ached to be stuffed with her cock, but you knew that wasn’t going to be able to happen tonight. Though, you couldn’t really complain about that, Emily was just as good with her hands and mouth and judging by the punishment comment earlier, you would get everything you desired in the very near future. Her hand crooked within you, finding your g-spot once again and the pillows muffled your cry as your fingers tightened into the bedspread. You barely heard the click of the small vibrator being turned on but you certainly felt it as Emily pressed it onto your clit.

“Fuck…” you muttered, your hips jolting back towards her as it began to rub at your body.

“Give me another one, I know you’ve got it in you.” She practically growled, her fingers flicking faster within you as she turned the vibe up a notch and you gasped. She could see the sheen of sweat glimmering on your skin as pleasure rocked through you, your thighs had began to shake, your hips faltering as you continued to try to fuck yourself on her hand.

She picked up the pace of her hand, making sure she was giving you everything she could, pressing the vibrator harder against your throbbing clit before she turned it up to the highest speed. It was quiet, but the room was full of dirty noises, your squelching pussy, juices leaking down your thighs and onto Emily’s wrist, the quiet cries and whimpers muffled into the pillows as you tried to not moan, the whir of the vibrator.

“You’re almost there, I can feel it baby, let go for me.” She cooed, fingers brushing right over the sensitive spot, pressing harder and lingering for a second longer than the last thrust and you couldn’t help it, your orgasm tore through you like a wildfire.

“Oh fuck Emily!” The cry was louder than you’d intended and you winced the best you could as your body dropped to the mattress, shaking and trembling with pleasure. Emily clicked the vibrator off, her fingers slowing down, gently fucking you through your orgasm, watching the way your body twitched as she did so before she finally pulled them from you, sucking them clean. “Sorry.” You whimpered, little shivers and soft cries leaving you as pleasure surged through your nerves.

Emily’s hand softly ran up and down your back, nails scratching into your hair ever so softly as you continued to come down from your peak, a whimper escaping your lips whenever her nails traced over a sensitive spot of your body. A quiet knock on the door made both of you jump, Emily beginning to scramble to get the both of you under the covers as Spencer’s soft voice floated through the air.

“Is someone crying?” He asked and you stifled a laugh as Emily struggled to come up with an answer quickly.

“I—uh, accidentally elbowed her in the face, we’re fine.”

“You sure?” He asked quietly and you let out a quiet shriek at the sound of the doorknob turning.

“Yup!” You called back quickly, “totally fine, just hit the cheek. Serves me right for being a blanket hog.”

“…okay…” He replied and the two of you held your breath until his footsteps faded down the hallway. You heard his bedroom door click shut and a fit of quiet giggles took over you as Emily scowled down at you, swatting at your ass.

“I told you to be quiet.”

“Well then I guess I’m getting extra spankings for Christmas.” Your eyes sparkled with excitement as you looked up at her and she playfully rolled her eyes.

“Damn right you fucking are.”

__________

@svulife-rl @ssa-sapphic @mickey-gomez @clarawatson @yesterdaysgone @hbkpop @cabotfan42 @momlifebehard @alexusonfire @melindawarnersgf @itisdoctortoyousir @emilyprentiss4life @andreasvu @softgamerking @httpjupiterbby @somethingimaginative17 @temilyrights @alexxavicry @leelizzzle @mysticfalls01 @anya-casablanca @daddy-heather-dunbar @evilregal2002 @aliensaurusrex @alcabots @7thavenger @rustyzebra @ilovemycrayons @mandy-asimp @thegrantwater @leftoverenvy @kades95 @loverllyhurtswithoutyou @disneyfan624 @bluetodie @borg-queer

[callmemana]

Jay Halstead Fanfics: 1

🚨Don’t forget to reblog your favorite fanfics to show your love to the creators! They work hard and deserve every bit of love🚨

🧡if you have any recs that you like and want me to add don’t be afraid to tell me!🧡

Key: smut - 🌸/ fluff - 🦋 / angst - ☂️/ personal favorite - 👓/

Call It Love 2 @sheetsonfire 🌸🦋☂️👓

Distress @resanoona 🦋☂️👓

Down The Aisle @resanoona 🦋👓

Every Step @resanoona ☂️ (miscarriage)

Every Step of the Way @halstudandruz 🦋☂️👓

First Word @thebookreader12345 🦋👓

For You @resanoona 🦋☂️

Fuck Buddies With Jay @twoheartshookingup 🌸🦋

Glad You’re Safe @resanoona 🦋☂️👓

Grand Appearances @halstudandruz 🌸🦋☂️👓

Hard For Me @resanoona 🦋☂️👓

Heartbeat On The Line @thebookreader12345 🦋☂️

Home To You @sheetsonfire 🦋☂️👓

I Am The Apocalypse Mini Series @resanoona 🦋☂️👓

Invasion @resanoona 🦋☂️

In My Eyes @resanoona 🦋☂️👓 (plus sized reader)

In Trouble @resanoona 🦋☂️

Lockdown @resanoona 🦋☂️

Murder Next Door Series @resanoona 🦋☂️👓

One Plus One @resanoona 🦋☂️👓

Pieces Series @resanoona 🦋☂️👓

Protective @resanoona 🦋☂️👓 (severide! Sister)

Secrets @street-smarts-baby 🦋☂️👓

Somebody’s Watching @resanoona ☂️👓

Taken @resanoona 🦋☂️👓

Ten Years @resanoona ☂️👓

The Innocent Detective Series @poppadom0912 🦋☂️👓

The Life I Had 2 3 @jaysevhls 🦋☂️

The Most Important Thing 2 3 @fanboysfangirl 🦋☂️

Where Have You Been Series @resanoona 🦋☂️👓

Your Hand In Mine @sheetsonfire 🦋☂️👓

[wordsandupstead]

secrets, soup, and sassiness

summary:  Set in the Unsteady storyline, but can be read as a Halstead!sister stand alone. Three different times Emma gets sick. 

bingo square filled: Sick/Illness for #resa.3kfiestabingo by @resanoona​

word count: 4k 

masterlist

~~~

The first time Emma gets sick after moving in with Jay

What started as a dull headache in the morning turned to a pounding headache and pain in the back of her neck by the time school finished. Emma thought it wasn’t a big deal and asked a friend for Advil at lunch, it helped briefly but by the time the final bell rings, Emma just wants to go home, crawl into bed, and sleep until the pain subsides. 

A loud knocking on her bedroom door wakes her, but the pain in her head hits nearly as fast. Emma can barely get her bearings before she realizes she feels so nauseous she thinks she’s going to throw up. She doesn’t think she can make it to the bathroom, so she rushes over to the trash bin in the corner of her bedroom. Nothing comes up, but she feels so exhausted she plops down on the floor near the trash bin, her back against the wall. 

“Emma? Are you in there?” Jay’s muffled voice floats through her closed bedroom door. 

It takes a few seconds for Emma to gather the energy to respond. “Yeah.” 

“Oh,” She hears Jay’s voice from the other end. “What do you want for dinner?” 

“Not hungry.”

“Did you eat already?” 

“Yeah,” She lies, “I’m just finishing my homework.”

“Uh okay,” Jay’s voice comes from the other side of the door. He still hasn’t opened it, and since Emma doesn’t have the energy to stand and walk over there, they’ve been speaking through the closed door. “Just come out if you’re hungry.” 

Emma falls back asleep almost immediately after making it back to bed and when she wakes up again, it’s after ten pm. She uses the bathroom quickly, splashing water on her face before going to sleep again. 

The next morning, when her alarm goes off for school, she just silences it. Jay pounds on the door again, telling her she’ll be late to school if she doesn’t wake up. She drags herself out of bed and gets dressed, despite the fact that her headache feels worse than it did the day before. Emma barely manages to eat half a piece of toast, just so she can take another Advil and hope to get through the school day.  

Emma manages to stay awake through her first two periods, but can’t help but keep dozing off during chemistry. Her teacher notices and sends her to the nurse despite Emma’s insistence that she’s fine. 

Even though the nurse asks about her symptoms, Emma doesn’t admit to not feeling well. The nurse checks her temperature, although Emma tries to tell her that she is fine. When the thermometer reads 101.2, the nurse tells her she has to go home and offers to let Emma call a parent to sign her out, which is what most teenagers prefer to do. When Emma hesitates a little too long, then asks if she can just sign herself out and go home, the nurse call’s Jay to inform him of what’s going on. 

By the time Emma gets called into the office from the nurse when Jay arrives, Emma has worked herself into a silent panic, which is only making her feel worse overall. “Are you okay? What’s wrong?” Jay asks as soon as she enters the front office to find him standing there waiting for her. When she doesn’t answer, he thanks the front office staff and he holds the door open then follows her outside. 

As soon as they’re out of the office, Emma immediately begins apologizing, catching Jay by surprise. “I’m so sorry for making you leave work.”

“Are you not sick?” He questions, seeming confused, he glances at Emma then back at the office doors, wondering if he got the right information. 

“I’m fine.” Emma lies. 

“The nurse said you had a fever. She said she tried to give you Advil, but you said you already took some?” 

“Yeah, I uh just had a headache this morning.” Emma responds trying to downplay how bad she’s actually feeling. “My chem teacher made me go to the nurse because she said I looked sick, but I’m fine. I promise.” 

Jay has to agree with Emma’s chemistry teacher. Even though emma continues to say she’s fine, she looks pale, especially in the sunlight. She has dark circles under her eyes, and Jay noticed the way she  seemed to have a hard time just standing and talking to him. Jay reaches his hand toward her and she flinches away. He freezes, before asking, “Can I feel your forehead? I just want to see if you feel warm.” 

“I guess.” She shrugs and remains still.

He gently presses his palm against her forehead, then nods and says, “You definitely have a fever.” 

“I’m fine.” Emma repeats. “I’m sorry for making you leave work. I can just walk home so you can go back to work. I just needed an adult to sign me out.” 

Jay looks at her like she’s not making any sense, and finally he says, “I’m not making you walk home with a fever.” Like it’s the most absurd thing he’s heard.  “C’mon,” Jay says, leading the way across the parking lot, toward his truck. 

Emma hesitates, but eventually follows him and gets in the truck. She doesn’t feel well, at all, and she wants nothing more than to fall asleep. She knows she was in no condition to go to school this morning, but it didn’t seem like an option to stay home and admit to Jay that she wasn’t feeling well, but now he knows. 

Emma can’t help but worry Jay is upset with her, even though he doesn’t seem upset. She still feels on edge. She knows he was at work, and she knows he had to leave to come get her, and deep inside, it feels wrong. Emma had been in so many foster homes and group homes where she was treated like an inconvenience when she was sick. She was told so many times, overtly and subliminally, to not have needs, to not take too much time or energy from those who were supposed to care for her. 

Despite the worry and panic, Emma holds it in well. She doesn’t have much energy left, so she curls into herself, leaning against the passenger door. Her warm forehead feels good against the cool window, and she nearly falls asleep on the drive home. 

When they get there, she hops out of the truck, fully expecting him to just drive off, “Thanks for bringing me home.” She tells Jay, “I hope you didn’t lose too much time at work.” 

He surprises her by getting out too, and following her into the elevator. She wants to say that he doesn’t have to walk her up, but she doesn’t want to say too much or assume to much, so she remains silent. He does too. 

He unlocks the apartment door and asks, “Do you need anything?” As she’s walking to her bedroom. 

“No, I’m good.” Emma immediately replies. 

Jay rephrases the question, “Do you want anything?” 

“No thank you.” Emma responds politely, then disappears into her room, closing the door behind her and collapsing onto the bed, every ounce of her energy used up. Emma falls asleep almost immediately.  

A knocking sound pulls her from her sleep, “Emma, are you awake? I’m worried about you.” She can’t bring herself to respond. The knocking persists. After another few seconds, she hears, “I’m coming in, okay? I need to check on you. If you’re really okay, say no and I won’t come in.” There’s silence on the other end, and Emma doesn’t say anything, so the door slowly opens. When Emma opens her eyes, she sees Hailey’s blond head peeking in despite it being Jay’s voice that was coming through the door. 

“Just wanted to check on you.” Hailey says softly, “How are you feeling?” 

“I’m fine.” Emma responds, her default response anytime she’s asked, although truthfully, she wasn’t usually asked very often. “Why aren’t you at work?” 

Hailey looks at Emma for a moment before responding, “I’m done for the day. It’s six pm.” Emma just nods, accepting this information, so Hailey speaks again, “Jay said that the nurse checked your temperature at school and you had a fever?” She phrased it like a question, but it didn’t seem like much of a question to Emma, so she just shrugs. “Can I check your temperature?”

Emma nods, and Jay steps into the room, handing Hailey the thermometer. Hailey presses a button on it, and then hands it to Emma to take her own temperature. She does, and then hands it back to Hailey without even trying to read it. Hailey takes it, then shows the number to Jay.

“It’s 102. That means it’s probably been high most of today. Maybe we should go to the hospital.” Jay says once he sees the number. 

Emma immediately freezes up, and both Hailey and Jay notice. 

It only lasts a second before she seems to snap out of it. “I’m fine. I can take another Advil.” She insists, but her voice shakes, and Jay and Hailey exchange a look about her sudden change in attitude. 

“You’ve been taking Advil. It hasn’t been working.” 

“I can take three this time so it works.”

“No, you can’t.” Jay responds, shaking his head. 

Tears start forming in Emma’s eyes, “Please don’t make me go. I’ll be fine. I promise. You won’t even know I’m sick.”

Jay’s eyebrows knit together, and he studies Emma closely. He can tell she’s panicking, but he doesn’t fully understand why. He doesn’t understand why she’s so insistent that she’s not sick when she is very clearly sick. “What are you talking about?” He questions aloud. “We just want you to feel better. We don’t want you to pretend not to be sick.” 

“I’m fine. I promise. I really would just like to sleep, please.” Emma pleads, and Jay can tell she’s barely holding it together, but he still doesn’t understand why she doesn’t want help. “Please, can I just go back to sleep?” She asks again.

Hailey looks at Jay who looks truly torn between forcing Emma to go to the doctor and respecting her wishes. 

“Do you think you can eat something, maybe some soup or a piece of toast?” Hailey asks gently, tabling the doctor conversation for later. 

“I’m not hungry,” Emma says, lying back down in bed, her eyes falling closed. 

Hailey persists. “Emma, sweetie, you need to eat something and that way you can take another Advil.”

“Okay.” She whispers, her eyes still closed. 

“What do you want? Soup, toast, we have some leftover chicken, or Jay can run out and pick up food from somewhere.”

“Yeah, anything you want.” Jay chimes in and truly at this point he would be willing to drive clear across town to get Emma anything she wanted if it meant she would eat something and feel better. 

“Maybe just some bread,” Emma manages to say, although truthfully, she doesn’t want to eat anything. She just wants to go back to sleep. She wants her head to stop hurting. She wants the panic from the threat of going to the doctor to subside. 

Hailey remains in Emma’s room while Jay leaves to get the bread and Advil. Jay adds some peanut butter to a slice of bread and folds it in half, hoping she’ll get some protein in because he realizes she probably didn’t eat dinner the night before. She was in her room when he came home from work and had said she’d eaten, but Jay is starting to realize she probably wasn’t feeling well from the night before. He just doesn’t understand why she would keep it a secret and go to school if she was sick.

By the time he returns with the peanut butter sandwich, Emma had fallen back asleep again. They have to wake her up to eat the sandwich. She only eats a few bites, but it’s better than nothing. They give her two Advil and hope it helps to bring the fever down. 

When she’s asleep again, they leave the room, leaving the door open a crack so they can check on her.  

The distinctive sound of whimpering and sniffling comes from Emma’s room. Jay and Hailey had been curled up on the couch together watching tv with the sound turned almost all the way down, not wanting to disturb Emma, but not wanting to close her bedroom door either, just in case. Jay jumps up first, but Hailey is only steps behind him as he closes the distance to Emma’s room. “Emma?” Jay softly asks, stopping in her doorway, pushing the door further open. 

He can see her tangled in her sheets and blankets. She’s not moving, but they can still hear the sounds of her sobs, “Em?” Jay asks again, this time crossing the threshold of the bedroom. As he gets closer, repeating Emma’s name again, he realizes she’s not awake. He glances back at Hailey, her concerned expression mirroring his. 

“She’s sleeping.” He whispers. “Should I wake her?”

Hailey pauses, then shakes her head. “Maybe if she doesn’t wake up now, she won’t remember it when she does.” 

Jay takes Hailey’s hand, squeezing. It hurts him to see her in clear distress while being unable to do anything about it. Hailey squeezes back. Emma settles down, the sobbing stops, and Jay and Hailey return to the couch. 

When Emma wakes up again an hour later, she doesn’t mention the nightmare and Jay doesn’t ask. When he checks her temperature and sees the 102.3 blinking back at him, he deflates. “Your fever is still very high.” He informs her, but she doesn’t move or say anything. “I’ll be right back.” He leaves the bedroom and Hailey wanders in as Jay makes the call to Will, who answers on the third ring. Jay shares all of his concerns and relays Emma’s symptoms as best as he can, although he doesn’t have much to go off since Emma wouldn’t even admit to feeling sick. 

Will advises Jay that Emma should probably see a doctor since her fever is so high and the fever reducing meds don’t seem to be working. Jay thought Will might say that, but he wanted to double check since Emma seemed so against going to the doctor. 

“I don’t really want to wait until morning to schedule an appointment. We’ve already waited all day. Should I just take her to the ER tonight?” Jay questions. Never having been responsible for another person in this way before, he’s unsure of how to proceed. 

“Yeah, her medical should be covered because she’s in the foster system. Just call her social worker and she should be able to give you any info you need.” Will advises. Jay thanks him and hangs up before calling the social worker. When she doesn’t answer the phone, Jay just leaves a message and decides to take her to the emergency room because he doesn’t want to wait any longer with her fever so high.

When he goes back into Emma’s room, Hailey is sitting with her and they’re watching a funny video on her phone. “Are you feeling better?” He asks, hoping the answer will be yes. 

She nods, saying, “I’m good.” 

But she doesn’t look good and Jay is hesitant to believe her since she hasn’t admitted to feeling anything except “good” and “fine” and Jay is confident she hasn’t been fine.

Jay grabs the thermometer and has Emma check her temperature again. When the 102.5 blinks back at him, he says, “It’s still a high fever. Let’s go to the ER.” He tries to say it casually, hoping that she doesn’t freak out, but her expression immediately changes. 

“Please, no.” Emma manages to squeak out. 

“Em, I know you’re not feeling good, but we have to go to the emergency room. They’ll know what to do, I promise.” 

“We’ll be there with you the whole time.” Hailey gently reassures Emma. 

Jay grabs Emma’s jacket from where she discarded it on the chair in the corner and brings it back to her. She’s uncharacteristically quiet, but doesn’t put up a fight at all. She just takes the jacket from Jay, barely making eye contact with either Jay or Hailey as she pulls her shoes on and follows Jay and Hailey out of the apartment and into Jay’s truck where he turns the heat way up and tries reassuring Emma that this is for the best and the doctor will make her feel better. 

While waiting in the emergency room waiting room, Jay is trying to fill out the paperwork with the limited information he has available regarding history, insurance, and symptoms, but Hailey’s attention is mostly on Emma. She’s noticed the way Emma keeps clenching and unclenching her fists. She can feel the anxiety rolling off of Emma in waves, and she tries to get to the bottom of it. 

“Hey Emma, are you…” She hesitates, trying to find the right words to ask the question she’s trying to ask. “Do you feel like you’re not allowed to be sick?” 

Emma looks up at Hailey and makes eye contact briefly before looking away, fidgeting with her hands even more. When Emma doesn’t answer right away, Hailey tries again, “You can be honest. We won’t be upset.” 

Emma nods, almost imperceptibly, and Hailey takes that as an answer to the first question. 

“Did you get in trouble for being sick?” Hailey’s voice is barely above a whisper, but Emma hears her and nods again. Hailey wisely lets the silence hang in the air between them. By this point, Jay has finished filling out the paperwork and he’s looking between Emma and Hailey, having heard the questions Hailey was asking. 

Emma nods, admitting, “They would be mad because they take off work to take care of me when I was sick.” 

“Who would?” Hailey asks softly at the same time Jay says, “What do you mean they got mad at you for being sick? You don’t decide to get sick.” Jay’s anger starts bubbling up.

Emma’s eyes fall closed and she pulls her jacket tighter around her body before fidgeting with the zipper.  She doesn’t have enough energy to respond to either of them, but all she knows is that Jay sounds upset, and she wants to disappear. 

Hailey’s hand subtly finds Jay’s, squeezing gently. He takes a deep breath, “We won’t be mad at you for being sick, ever.” He finally says. “But we do want you to tell us when you’re not feeling well, so we can help, okay?”

Emma nods, but still feels uncomfortable and worries that Jay is upset. “I thought you’d be mad at me because you had to leave work.” 

Jay’s voice is much softer now, “Em, I won’t ever be mad at you for feeling sick. It’s my job to take care of you when you’re sick.” 

“It’s not your real job.” 

“It is my real job, and it’s more important than my other job.” He reassures her.

She nods, a warmth spreading across her chest that has nothing to do with her fever. It’s been so long, Emma can hardly remember anyone caring for her like this before, but she lets herself believe this time it might actually be okay to let Jay and Hailey care about her, to let them take care of her so she doesn’t have to suffer by herself and pretend to be okay when she’s not. 

The fifth time Emma get’s sick after moving in with Jay

“Hello?” Jay answers the phone as soon as he sees Emma’s name on the caller ID, knowing she’s at school and wouldn’t be calling him if it wasn't important. 

“I’m sick, can you come get me?” Emma’s voice is scratchy and low as it floats through the phone

Jay immediately stands from his desk, pulling the phone briefly from his mouth, catching Hailey’s attention. “Emma’s sick.” He tells her, and Hailey nods, all the confirmation he needs to leave the district without another word to anyone, his phone still to his ear as he jogs down the steps. 

“I’m coming.” He tells her. “What kind of sick?”

There’s a brief pause, “I’m really tired, and my throat hurts.”

“Okay, are you at the health room?” 

“No, can you just sign me out?” Emma may have come around to telling Jay when she’s not feeling well, but her comfort level hasn’t really extended beyond that. 

“Yeah, I’ll sign you out when I get there. I’m leaving the district now.” 

After a few more minutes of trying to get more information about how she’s feeling and mostly failing, Jay hangs up the phone and drives the rest of the way to the school. He heads into the office and explains that he needs to pick his sister up.

When Emma enters the office, she looks ill, and Jay tries to think back to that morning, wondering if she was sick before she came to school. He doesn’t remember noticing anything different this morning, but it’s not important right now. All he’s worried about is making sure she’s okay now. 

She follows him out of the office and gets into the passenger side of his truck, letting him drive her home. It doesn’t matter that she drove herself to school that morning. She wanted him to pick her up, so that’s what he did. 

When they get home, Emma disappears into her room immediately getting into her bed and pulling the covers up to her chin. She doesn’t bother closing her bedroom door, so Jay tries to be quiet as he moves around the kitchen. He knows enough about Emma now to know that when she’s sick, she prefers soup from the can. Since Emma called right before lunch period, he knows she hasn’t eaten, so he starts warming up the soup. Twenty minutes later, he lightly knocks on her open bedroom door. When she rolls over in bed, he knows she’s awake, so he says, “I brought you soup.”

“From the can?” She asks.

Jay nods, stepping inside with the soup, “Of course.” 

He carefully hands her the soup and waits as she starts eating. After she’s had a few bites, he asks, “How are you feeling?” 

“My throat hurts when I swallow and I feel like I haven’t slept in four days.” She admits. 

“Any other symptoms?” Jay questions, “Fever?” 

She just shrugs, and Jay disappears to retrieve the thermometer from the bathroom cabinet. He checks her temperature and it reads a low grade fever. 

He ponders the numbers for a few seconds before saying, “Maybe we should go to the doctor.” 

Emma’s eyes snap up to his. 

It’s been nearly two years since she moved in with Jay, but there are some things that still linger. She’s not nearly as afraid of doctors anymore, and she’s clearly more willing to admit when she’s not feeling well, but that doesn’t mean she likes going to the doctor. 

“It might be strep.” Jay tries explaining, but Emma continues to stare at him. He hesitates, “Maybe we can wait til tomorrow. If you’re still not feeling well, then we should go, just to get tested to make sure it’s not strep. If it is, you need antibiotics.” 

She nods, eating more soup, accepting this decision. She finishes her soup and asks for juice, which Jay gladly brings her. He can’t help but cater to her more than usual when she’s not feeling well. 

The first time Emma gets sick after moving to college. 

When Jay’s phone starts buzzing with an incoming FaceTime from Emma, he answers immediately. It’s been a few days since he last spoke with her, but he tries to take it as a good sign, knowing that she’d call if she needed something or if she wasn’t okay. 

Jay knows Emma is busy with coursework and making new friends so he tries not to call her too often, although he hasn’t put a limit on the amount of check in texts he sends. 

When Emma’s face fills the screen, he smiles, “Hey Em, what’s up?” 

“I’m walking to the health center.” She responds, and Jay immediately feels alarm and worry creeping up. Letting Emma go to college has been just as hard for Jay as it has been for Emma, arguably even harder for Jay. He knows she’s capable and can take care of herself, but he can’t help but wish she chose a school that was a little bit closer. It’s hard for him to accept that she’s growing up and he has to let her do things on her own. 

“Why?” Jay asks. 

“I just have a runny nose and a sore throat. I just want to get checked out because if it's the flu or something maybe I can just get some medicine.” 

“Do you have your medical card? I think I have a duplicate copy of it somewhere.” Jay’s begins looking around even though he’s seated at his desk in the bullpen. He tries to remember where he put the extra card. 

“Yes, I have my medical card.” Emma says with a roll of her eyes and Jay’s glad she’s not feeling too sick to be sassy. 

“I can drive down tonight. We’re wrapping up a case, but it shouldn’t be more than a couple of hours. Hailey and I can come down and make a weekend of it.”

“Jay, you don’t have to. I’m fine. I’m gonna go get checked out at the health center and see what they say and then I’ll probably just sleep all weekend.”

“But who’s gonna make you soup?” Jay asks.

“It comes from a can.” Emma says with a small smile on her face, “It’s not exactly rocket science.” 

Jay concedes, only because he actually does believe that Emma is just fine and that she would tell him if she wasn’t. “Okay, but the offer still stands. If you start to feel worse, or if you just want us there, call me and we can be there in two hours.” 

“I will.” Emma responds, “I just got to the health center so I’ll text you later. I’ll let you know how it goes.” 

“Okay,” Jay responds, feeling a sense of pride in how far Emma has come. He remembers a time when she would have a panic attack and completely shut down at even the mention of going to the doctor and now she’s willingly going on her own because she knows it’ll help her feel better. 

He gets back to work, already mentally mapping out his weekend. Even though Emma seemed fine, he knows he and Hailey will probably make the four hour round trip at least once this weekend even if it’s just to check in and heat her up some soup. 

[afriendlyneighborhoodhufflepuff]

Sicker than a Dog

Square filled: Sick/comfort for @resanoona’s fiesta bingo

Ship: none. Halstead Sister

Summary: Y/N is sick with a stomach bug and her brothers help her out

Authors Notes: Mentions of vomiting/being sick.

Jay and Will walked into the apartment to hear someone retching and then a small whine. Will sets the bag of groceries down on the counter and walks towards the noise, Jay following behind him.

“Hey Squirt, you feeling ok?” Will asks as he knocks on the bathroom door before opening it. He sees you next to the toilet, head resting on your arms, which are on the porcelain. You shake your head, not wanting to speak, in fear of vomiting more.

“I can assume family dinner is off then. I’ll let Hailey know.” Jay says, sending a text to his girlfriend. He leaves you and Will in the bathroom and goes to put the groceries away.

Will kneels next to you, studying your face. “Can I ask when this started?” “This afternoon while you guys were out.” “Just throwing up? Upset stomach?” He asks as you nod your head, sniffling.

He helps you and ensures you’re good to brush your teeth before heading down the hall to your room and turning down your bed.

He hears you head to the kitchen and ask Jay if there are any Saltine crackers. He catches your eye as you enter your room as he’s leaving it. “Hey, squirt, sounds like you’ve got a stomach bug. I’ll put a Gatorade in the fridge. Go get in the tub and then get in bed.” He says as you grimace, feeling your stomach turn.

You get in the bath, turning on a book to listen to. You stay there until the water goes cold, and then you slowly put on your pajamas and get in bed, leaving your door open.

Your brothers are sitting on the couch, watching a hockey game when Jay pipes up. “What can I do? To help Y/N? What’s she got?” “She’s got a stomach bug. It’s gonna take a couple of days till she feels completely better, but hopefully, with her sleeping, it should help. Just keep an eye on her and make sure she eats something. Doesn’t have to be bland, just something small.” Will says, standing up, and heading towards the door.

Will leaves, which leaves you and Jay at home. Jay eventually turns off the game and gets ready for bed. He heads down the hall to check on you and finds you sleeping peacefully, and he presses a kiss to your forehead before going to his room.

[halsteadlover]

About the previous poll!

So I was thinking about writing for:

Chicago PD:

Kevin Atwater

Adam Ruzek

Antonio Dawson (I’m not sure about it)

Chicago Med:

Will Halstead

Connor Rhodes

Criminal Minds:

Aaron Hotcher

Derek Morgan

Spencer Reid

Let me know what do you think, would you like to read fics about those characters? Are there other characters you suggest me to write for? Please let me know in the comments or even with an anon!

I also wanted to thank my boo @resanoona for encouraging me to write for those other characters and reassuring me it’s okay to be nervous. Girl get yourself ready bcs I’m about to stress the hell out of you 😭 ilysm ❤️

[sebastianstangirl01]

Do you have any Halstead! Sister fic recommendations? It's so hard to find anything platonic for One Chicago. Everything seems to be romantic😭

I agree! It is so hard to find them, that’s why I want to write some so maybe it would inspire others to as well. But I have read some amazing Halstead Sister fics on here and I’ll list the blogs below!!

@irislikeswriting

@jayhalsteadsimp2019

@jayhalsteadslover

@amsgrey

@resanoona

@anotherspnfanfic

@poppadom0912

@thebookreader12345

@i-spaced-sorry

@study-coffee-chicago

@plotting-against-you

@writinghalstead

@i-like-sparkly-things

I’m sure there are more out there but these are just some of the ones I’ve read! I hope you enjoy!

[sheetsonfire]

hi, i love you, that's all! <33333

HI, I LOVE YOU, THAT'S ALL TOO <33333

[sheetsonfire]

HI I LOVE RESA SM - SHE IS SO TALENTED!!!

@sheetsonfire being the most supportive? Bestie vibes i love you!!!

[i-like-sparkly-things]

Stabbed

Jay halstead × Will halstead

Happy new year yall!! Here's to another year of my favorite brothers and me putting them through the worst case scenarios yay. This is for @resanoona 's 3k bingo Fiesta, square filled is hurt comfort (again)

Will glared at him, tired of his childishness "That's it--" he huffed "--Jay I swear to God I will call Hailey"

"You wouldn't dare"

"Oh yes I will. You really wanna wake her up in the middle of the night just to lecture you?" Jay bowed his head at that, choosing to look at the bathroom tiles from where he was perched on the edge of the toilet. "That's what I thought"

"I'm alright Will, really."

"You were stabbed!! I should be dragging your ass to med right now, you know that?!!"Jay rolled his eyes, choosing to not reply.

The next hour was spent with Jay pouting throughout Will's ministrations at his abdomen, petulantly swatting his hand away and zoning out from Will's lectures.

Will wrapped a strong arm around Jay's waist and lead him towards the couch for some much needed rest, pushing pain meds into Jay's hands with a stern look on his face that left no room for arguments.

Soon, Will was combing his fingers through Jay's hair, hearing soft snores leave his lips.

[study-coffee-chicago]

Rules: Write the latest line from your WIP (or post where you last left off on in your art) and tag as many people as there are words in the line. Make a new post, don’t reblog. 

From something I’m gonna post later this week but don’t have a title for yet lol

"In my bag in the rental," Jay confirmed.

This gives literally nothing away haha

@resanoona @i-like-sparkly-things Can’t think of anyone else, so if I’ve ever liked/reblogged something you’ve written, feel free to join in!

(I was tagged by @plotting-against-you )

[storiesofsvu]

Iowa Chill

Heather Dunbar x Jackie Sharp. Warnings: language, hurt comfort, political crap. Covers the hurt/comfort square for @resanoona 3k bingo. Anon requested: "[ jaw ] - for receiver to place leisurely kisses along sender's jaw for the duckie couple?" and I took it in a completely different direction cause I needed some hurt today. Set directly after the Iowa debate.

The air in Iowa was thick with many things tonight, but the one Jackie was currently feeling down to her bones was the cold. Getting the cold shoulder from Heather certainly wasn’t helping. Then again, that was her own doing and she knew it.

She knew she was crossing the line during the debate, that there was no doubt Heather would be upset about the other woman dragging her kids into things. She hadn’t meant to, the topic just opened up and the words slipped from her lips before she’d really even realized. She’d felt the coldness from Heather’s eyes instantly, knowing that she’d fucked up. That was the problem being political opponents while also harbouring a very secretive relationship.

They’d taken separate cars back to the hotel for obvious reasons, and Jackie was more than ever thankful for the fact that Heather had a full suite booked, it was easy for the other woman to disappear into the office and leave Jackie to fend for herself. Jackie tried to stay out of the way, tail between her legs as she attempted to warm herself up with a shower, wrapping herself in warm pyjamas as she moved through the bedroom. She let out a huff, dropping onto the bed, fingers fiddling with the exorbitant diamond on her finger. Her eyes drifted from the tv to the ring and she rolled her eyes, tugging it off and tossing it to the bedside table with a groan before she collapsed back into the pillows, staring at the ceiling. Both of their marriages were shams, but there was always something gnawing at Jackie knowing that Heather’s used to actually mean something. The only reason she stayed with Rob was the exact same reason Jackie married Allan, appearances. Both of the men knew what was going on with their wives, they had been open and upfront about everything from the start and they’d settled into the roles they needed to play with ease. It was exhausting, the constant playing pretend when the person you actually loved was across the table from you instead and this election was making everything feel like it was at a breaking point, there were more than a few days that Jackie felt like getting in the car driving away from it all, never wanting to set foot in Washington ever again.

Today was certainly starting to feel like one of those days.

Jackie curled around herself, shifting so she was at least partially under the covers and her eyes stared blankly at the television, not absorbing a single ounce of what was playing as her thoughts took over. She must have dozed off because the next thing she remembered was her phone buzzing on the bed next to her, ripping her from her dreamless sleep. She rubbed at her eyes, blinking a few times as she sat up against the headboard, swiping through notifications until she found the most recent, a text from Remy, the only person in the workplace she’d confided to about her true relationship.

‘How’d she take the kid thing?’

Jackie let out a weary sigh, her eyes flitting to the time displayed on the screen and realized it was already nearing eleven thirty. Her brow furrowed, wondering if Heather was still working, or if she was simply avoiding sleeping in the same bed as her. She tugged her lip into her mouth, chewing on it for a moment as she thought, her ears perking up to any noise coming from the other parts of the suite. Heather knew she would have to take a few digs at her, especially during the debate, hell, they’d even gone over subjects together, helped each other run through mock arguments in preparation. The only problem being that Underwood had done the same with Jackie, planting seeds in her words that would hopefully tip Heather off balance enough to be buried. She cursed herself for even getting on that plane in the first place, she should’ve known better than to align herself with the devil.

Pocketing her phone she slipped from under the covers, shivering at the chill running through the air as she began to move through the suite. A lamp was on in the living room, the tv on low volume, the evening news still covering the election, but it was the light coming from the second room Heather had made into an office that piqued her interest. Knowing how terse the other woman could get, she hung back in the doorway, softly knocking on the frame to not interrupt or annoy. Heather glanced up, her head tilting at Jackie wrapped around herself.

“I thought you’d gone to bed?”

“Too fucking cold to sleep.” She murmured, staying frozen on the spot, “can… I come in?”

Heather nodded, pulling off her glasses to set them on the desk in front of her as she pushed her chair back a bit, giving Jackie the permission and space to settle on her lap. The younger woman was nearly hesitant as she approached, but over the years the two of them had become very effective in non verbal communication, and she knew she was welcomed. She curled herself on Heather’s lap, head coming to rest on her shoulder, feeling Heather’s arm wind around her waist as she nuzzled into the embrace. Silence took over the room, even with Heather’s hand softly playing with Jackie’s hair, the buzz of awkwardness was floating through the cool air, neither of them quite sure where to start, neither of them having energy to even try to bicker much less fight. As always, it was Heather that broke the silence, knowing that Jackie had relinquished all control, any power she had held during her cold remarks during the debate vanishing into thin air the moment they retreated to their hotel suite.

“Do you really think I’m a terrible mother?” Her voice was barely above a whisper, and if Jackie had been listening harder she would have heard the slight tremble hiding behind her words.

“You know I don’t.” Jackie murmured, her head shifting so she could press gentle kisses to the other woman’s jaw between her words, “but I do think it’s about time to stop lying to them.”

“I wouldn’t classify this as lying.” Heather nearly scoffed.

“They’re going to figure it out eventually. You and Rob don’t sleep in the same room, and I’m over for dinner more nights than not.”

“You’re their godmother.” Heather let out a small hum at the feeling of Jackie’s lips meeting her jawline once again.

“Pretty sure that technically means I’m the caregiver if something happens to the two of you, not that I need to have weekly sleepovers.”

“Hmph.”

A silence fell over them again, the elephant in the room creeping closer and closer as they continued to avoid the topic. Finally Jackie spoke, ever the wounded bird, wanting to make sure she hadn’t damaged things too terribly, that she hadn’t sacrificed her love for political gain.

“I’m sorry about what I said during the debate.” She murmured, leaving a soft kiss just under Heather’s ear, “Underwood wanted me to play an angle… I didn’t want to, but the door opened and I ran with things without even thinking. I didn’t mean to bring the kids into things.”

“Your apology is accepted.” Heather replied softly, her lips finally meeting Jackie’s temple and the younger woman let out a breath she hadn’t realized she was holding. “I’m sorry I fired back about your own kids.”

“But they’re not.” Jackie muttered, sighing softly, “they’re Allan’s, and I barely know them. I watched yours grow up…”

Heather took a breath, taking a moment to untangle all of her thoughts from the day, her hand softly ghosting up and down Jackie’s back.

“If we keep up like this… neither of us is going to win.”

“What do you mean?” Jackie felt her heart leap into her throat, her pulse skyrocketing as she pulled her head up from the crook of Heather’s neck, her eyes wide as she met her gaze.

“The election…” the older woman chuckled softly, recognizing her love’s panic, her hand stroking at her cheek gently. “You said it yourself; we can’t be on the same ticket; we need a southerner with a penis.”

“So?”

“Take Underwood’s offer.” Heather urged, “as long as you trust him enough to put you on the ticket, you drop out and endorse him.”

“And what about you?” Jackie’s blue eyes swam with worry as she gazed across at the other woman, her had coming up to cup her cheek and Heather simply shrugged.

“He wants me out of the race anyways. I can meet with him, tell him I want to take the chief justice position, put in a stipulation that I’m only stepping down if he puts you on the ticket, get the deal in writing.”

“What… about us?” She asked and this time Heather could feel the sadness weighing on the other woman’s shoulders, the way the misting in her eyes increased, scared that this was no longer what they started with, that she was about to be left on the steps of the White House like an abandoned puppy. Heather let out a weary sigh, her gaze dropping for a moment as she played with Jackie’s hand in her lap, not missing the fact that the other woman had taken off her wedding ring.

“Well… if you win… then it’s at least another four years of secrecy.” She finally looked back up at her, “there’s no way you’re going to win office and keep it while going through a divorce scandal, never mind coming out.”

“But I love you…” Jackie’s voice cracked, ducking her gaze before Heather tapped at her chin, tilting her head back up to hers.

“I know you do.” She leant in, leaving a feather light kiss on her lips, “and I love you just as much.”

“Then why can’t we just run away and forget about all of this?” She asked and Heather chuckled.

“Because I want you to succeed, you deserve a chance at this. And don’t you remember those silver spoon fed children of mine? I can’t just up and leave them before either of them have left for college, I’ve got a couple of years at best.” Jackie huffed a laugh, a smile finally breaking free on her lips at the teasing in Heather’s voice and she glanced up at the woman, a blush creeping onto her cheeks as she noticed the amount of adoration flowing from her hazel eyes.

“You’re not upset with me?” She asked meekly and Heather shook her head, tilting her gaze up to hers once more.

“No. Not anymore.” She let out a soft sigh, leaning back in her chair, “I’ll admit the moment you said it I felt betrayed, I turned things on full force to rebuttal. But after a bit of reflecting I remembered that we agreed this was going to be tricky. It already was but throwing a political race into things made everything even messier, and I am willing to step out of the race to make sure we don’t hurt each other and damage our political relationship thus drowning our personal one.” Jackie paused for a moment, her fingers daintily playing with Heather’s hand in hers while she digested what she had said.

“You… you would do that for me?”

“It wasn’t my first thought… and I still want this as much as ever, but I also love you…”

“So why not fight?”

“Because fighting for you is far more worth it.” Heather admitted, the warmth blooming in her chest and she knew Jackie felt the same, a small smile on her lips when she finally looked up at her once again. She let out a huff of a laugh, swiping away a tear from the corner of her sapphire eyes.

“I don’t want this the same way you do.” She admitted with a sniffle, “I kinda got swept up in the excitement of it all, I was merely a pawn for Underwood to do with as he pleased.”

“What’re you saying?” Heather raised a curious brow, her hand softly running up and down Jackie’s back.

“I’ll talk to him when we get home, say this isn’t going in the direction I wanted, that I’m dropping and want nothing to do with him.”

“Then what do you want?”

“You.” Jackie replied instantly, “always and forever you, and only you.” Her hand cupped Heather’s cheek, kissing her softly, “take the justice job. We can be somewhat out of the spotlight and finally actually be together. If…. If that’s what you want.” Her timidness always made Heather chuckle softly, pinching at her chin when she dared to duck her gaze.

“You know that’s I want that.” She leant up to steal a kiss, “I’ll talk to Rob and the kids when we get home, I’m sure it won’t be an issue. Pretty sure they’ve figured it out already anyways.”

“I told you!” Jackie laughed, this time for real, the smile reaching her eyes as she leant in for another kiss, humming happily against Heather’s lips. “You’re really okay with this?”

“Yes.” She beamed up at her, “I adore you, I love you, as much as taking the Oval would please me the only thing I really, truly want is a future with you. All this political bullshit has done nothing but drive wedges between us, make us walk on eggshells around each other only to come back to each other at the end of a long day. We’ve always searched for each other, found peace with one another and found forgiveness… and that’s something I never want to let go of.”

“Good. Because I love you more than anything in the entire world.”

“Good.” Heather kissed the tip of her nose, “now how about we get you back to bed, from what I hear it’s a little chilly and you could use some cuddles.”

Jackie laughed softly, a little squeak leaving her lips as Heather nudged her off her lap, nearly toppling her to the floor in the process. Heather pressed a kiss to her temple, squeezing at her waist a little tighter to remind her just how much she was loved, how no matter what went down in the work day, in the political field, that she was more important than any of that crap. That the show they put on was exactly that, a show, and it was what took place behind closed doors that actually mattered. Because that was where the two women were allowed to show off their affection, where they were allowed to be soft and gentle together and that truly was what they both adored the most.

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