#reprogram that bad boy and express your anger as a man

[whiskingskin]

Something I've heard over and over and over again from my genderqueer friends about testosterone is that they're terrified to start, cause it'll make their anger?? Worse?? Maybe it was me finding myself In a body more comfortable, or me already being in therapy and conscious of my emotions and their impact but. Being on testosterone made a lot of my emotions feel more manageable.

Testosterone doesn't make you angrier. Testosterone doesn't transform you into this man-beast that yells at everybody and is suddenly horny all the time. Testosterone doesn't affect your problem solving skills, your people management, or your lack of foresight into your own anger like?

If you're routinely blowing up at the people in your life then yeah. Yeah, testosterone might make that action feel a bit easier and wilder. But if you, you know, acknowledge your emotions and allow yourself to experience them without taking them out on other people... then that. Won't. Happen.

You will never be able to control your emotions. Never ever ever. But you CAN and WILL control your reactions to these emotions.

Idk where my rambles were supposed to go but. Testosterone doesn't make you an angry person. You might BE an angry person, just on your own, and that's fine. What's not fine is taking that anger out on others and blaming it on testosterone. You're not the victim, you're just a dick.

[braveggg-hq]

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“Maybe I could have help myself when ma and pa were...in that time. I could have told her it wasn’t her fault...I really wish I could just tell myself that. Save some future pain...”

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He pauses and thinks.

“I am...unsure. But if you mean when I was first onlined. I honestly should have focused more on creating a relationship with my first creator. A good man he was, but I was told I was a more troublesome A.I and distant. I put my teammates through a lot because of that.”

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Kouryu shifted around on the chair, holding her knees and picking at her paint nervously.

“Well...I shouldn’t have panicked so much when they shut us down. I think I made it worse for us. But it wasn’t fun...terrifying since they told us or made it seem we would be disabled and reprogrammed. My sister said I was shouting not to be offlined, she was trying to calm me down but didn’t do much for me.”

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She rubbed her face with a sheepish expression on. “Be more out going, really my A.I was fine. In the end they didn’t reprogram us to bad, just changed some things. But I feel me being so reluctant to speak to anyone really put us all in the pool to be reprogrammed. My poor sister...”

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Yuuta smiled brightly before speaking. “Focusing more! Man did I fall asleep for some classes! Not proud of it, but made it this far ya know?” He rubbed the back of his head nervously.

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He almost scoffs and leaves. But stops and says something.

”choosing a better pathway for myself. A actual good cop then this.”

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“Not to sure kid, eh maybe being more blunt to Ayako with...heh, feelings.” He’s gotten used to just saying ‘feelings’. “Maybe have been a bit more friendly toward the new teammates, mostly with Drill Boy.”

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“Really, simple enough. Be a good police officer, rather then the perfect one.” Duke shifted. “Just...we know we have to be. But the team here...so much different.”

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Power joe smiled. “Not be so needy!”

Okay...maybe he should word that better.

“I mean! Well, be nice and more...uh...” He pauses and nervously chuckles. 

“Well. Hopefully you know what I mean...“

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“Practice soccer more and become the world champion!”

He pauses with a confused expression. “Oh! you mean wise words? Never mind then!” He just casually runs out slightly embarrassed with what he said.

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He lightly smiles and lets the grey humanoid sit down on a chair. Must have been running all over the place to get these answers!

“I have a lot I wish I could say to myself. Though I feel like one is important. Never let your anger get the better of you, and when you do feel upset about something...let it out while training. Never onto a citizen...”

He pauses and looks down.

“I...remember shooting that...criminal and what happened later. i almost got Yuuta and his family and friends killed...” His tone saddened for a moment.

“But now I have come to terms with that. I know how to let it out now. Much easier then when I was just turning out. Thanks to the team and humans, especially Yuuta.” His tone turned much lighter and softer at the end.

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