#repeating things or not saying things. because you forgot whether or not you told them

[revolutionsingingintherainnn]

Hi! I loved the "through their eyes" fanfic with lando, and i was wondering if youd do it with literally any other driver? Maybe oscar, max or charles? If not thats fine x

through their eyes .ೃ࿐ 

Summary: charles and y/n's relationship through other people's eyes.

lando's version

༉‧₊˚. cl x reader ‗ ❍

༉‧₊˚. fluff ‗ ❍

masterlist ☾☼

arthur

arthur loved his brother. he really did. his elder brother was his favourite person in the world sometimes.

key word: sometimes.

he hated his brother when he called in the middle of the night. he hated his brother a little more when his reason for calling was because he was afraid his new little puppy had accidentally eaten chocolates.

charles himself never ate chocolates. arthur knew that. so, he couldn’t understand where charles had the idea that leo ate chocolates.

nevertheless, he let his brother drag him to an emergency vet at 4 am. charles was craddling leo, talking to him in a baby voice. arthur tried to take the whole thing seriously, he really did, but sometimes his brother forgot that other people needed sleep.

"they're taking so long. what if something happens to leo in that time? this is an emergency." charles mumbled.

arthur sighed and said, "you're next in line. just be patient."

charles nodded and went back to running his fingers through leo's fur.

when they finally called charles' name, he immediately stood up and speed walked towards the door. arthur sighed, and followed behind, dragging his feet because he really just wanted to be in his bed right now.

"hi, i'm doctor y/l/n. what brings you here?" the doctor was pretty, arthur had to admit.

though, the funny part was the way his brother had lost the part of his brain that made sentences as he stared at the doctor with wide eyes.

as much as arthur loved to see his brother like this, he refused to let him make a fool of himself, or of arthur.

"his dog apparently ate chocolates?" arthur said.

the vet let out a small chuckle, "you say that as if you're not sure,"

"well, i just came home and saw chocolate wrappers around him, which was weird, and immediately rushed him here." charles finally said, finding the part of his brain that made words.

"that is weird. do you have a lot of chocolate at home?" she asked as she began to check for any signs on leo.

"not really. i don't eat a lot of chocolate," charles said, alternating between the doctor and leo.

"any idea where the chocolate was since it was accessible to such a small dog?"

both leclercs stopped for a second and thought. charles was usually careful about not leaving things like that near leo's reach, well aware that leo was a hyperactive dog. and for the days that charles was away, arthur babysat leo. just like he had done that day.

oh.

arthur's brain finally began working, and he hit his brother's back.

"i had the chocolates!" arthur exclaimed.

charles turned to him, confused, "what?"

"i was babysitting leo today and i got some chocolates with me!"

"so you ate them in my living room and left the wrappers?" charles asked, a little bit of anger seeping through his voice.

oh.

this was what arthur had told himself today to not repeat to his brother. that he had been lazy and decided not to clean up like he knew he should've.

arthur opened his mouth to defend himself, to say anything that could pass off and not have his brother lecture him in the middle of the night. but, the doctor saved him. thank fuck.

"oh, i know what you mean. sometimes, i have too many chocolates, and then i fall asleep from a sugar crash and forget to pick up the wrappers or clean up," she said casually, as she continued checking leo.

charles turned back to her, and arthur watched as he slowly nodded and accepted the answer. arthur wasn't sure whether he wanted to be pissed at that or amazed at the power this woman already held.

she subtly winked at arthur, and he decided that he liked this woman.

she turned to charles and said, "alright, he's not vomitting, so that's a good sign. i'm gonna write my personal number for you just in case there's an emergency."

arthur smiled, though he tried to hide it. he knew what she was doing. he just hoped his brother caught on too.

charles took the piece of paper from her, and thanked her. she waved at the two brothers, as they turned to leave.

just as they settled in charles' car, he asked, "why did she give me her personal number?"

arthur facepalmed.

carlos

carlos had been seeing charles' new "friend" quite often in the paddock. charles hadn't introduced them yet, and carlos didn't know why. he still respected his teammate's wishes.

carlos liked to think that he was an observant man. he liked to think that he knew charles well enough to read his body language and know or at least, understand some part of what his teammate was feeling.

he had been observing charles every time y/n was close by. had been watching the way charles stood a little taller, spoke a little softer, laughed a little harder. watched the way charles almost touched her back while showing her around, and insisted on putting the headphones on her head himself, and the way charles waited and waited for her to do anything and everything.

it reminded him of lando and his girlfriend. though, those two were much more touchy than whatever this was. in comparison, charles seemed hesitant, yet eager.

it was during the fourth or fifth grand prix that carlos noticed that charles was properly touching her. not just a hand on her back to guide her way, but a hand on the waist, and her arm, and sometimes her fingers. not only that, she was touching him just as much. she played with his rings and his hair, and she stood just a tad closer than friends would.

carlos knew then that something had changed. something had definitely changed, and he knew it was for the better. he did not say anything, though. it wasn't his place.

towards the end of the season, charles finally introduced the woman to carlos.

"carlos, this is dr. y/n y/l/n. she's a vet," he paused, "and my girlfriend,"

carlos smiled instantly. shaking y/n's hand, he said, "hello, dr. y/n. i am carlos sainz jr, though i'm sure you're already aware of that."

she laughed, and carlos watched the way charles lit up, "yes, i do know who you are! i'm so glad to finally meet you!"

"me too! i was expecting charles to hide you from the world, especially me," carlos laughed.

"i apologise, that was based on my request," y/n looked slightly apologetic, but she also seemed sure in her response. it was her request to not be known, and she had the vibe that she would fight anyone who questioned it.

"well, then i'm glad to see charles is capable to following requests. my request for feeding him pancakes have always been ignored. hopefully, you can convince him,"

charles groaned, while y/n laughed, leaning into him slightly.

"i'll convince him, for sure. don't worry,"

the three of them chatted for a little while longer, giggling and making fun of charles. when she started yawning, and leaning into charles more, carlos bid his goodbyes to the couple.

he watched as charles tucked her into him, and watched they shared a soft kiss as they walked towards the exit. he watched as charles smiled radiantly, and he smiled as well.

what was it with carlos and watching his teammates finding their forever loves in front of him?

lewis

being a part of ferrari had been a dream. it was everyone's dream. but, lewis had some doubts. it had been a tough decision, definitely. now, though, with almost half of the season over, lewis felt more comfortable.

he had been waiting for charles to finish talking to the fia president to go over some strategy changes for the next few races. he wasn't eavesdropping, he was just listening attentively for any signs of their conversation being over. lewis desperately wanted to go home, but he wanted to finish this and then go home.

as soon as the conversation ended, lewis watched as charles and his girlfriend bid their goodbyes and walked to charles' driver room. lewis jogged to keep up. he was 40. he shouldn't have to jog to keep up now.

just as lewis reached the door, the two had already locked themselves in the room. in hindsight, lewis could have just yelled at them to wait up like a normal person would, but well, maybe he doesn't care about the strategies enough to do it.

he raised his hand to knock when the words from inside the room registered in his brain.

"-such a dick." y/n was saying. who was a dick? a lot of people were dicks, so it didn't exactly narrow down the list for lewis.

charles laughed. his voice was louder. maybe he was standing closer to the door.

"don't laugh! it was so annoying standing there. three different people, including me, mentioned to that fuckass president of yours that i'm a vet and i have a medical degree, and i've made a name for myself! but, no! he kept referring to me as your girlfriend!"

if lewis leaned against the wall to get slightly more comfortable, he definitely didn't. definitely.

"you say as if it's a bad thing he referred to you as my girlfriend! you are my girlfriend, after all." charles said.

"that's not the point, charles. the point is that i'm accomplished in my own ways. i'm y/n y/l/n first, and somebody's something second. him refusing to acknowledge that i'm a doctor, even if it was for animals, was disrespectful."

lewis hoped that charles got his shit together in this conversation.

"i understand that. but, you know that's how he is. we've all told you stories of how he is. he's not going to change." well, lewis agreed that he wasn't going to change, but it still wasn't the argument that charles thought it was.

"that's bullshit, no? he's the president of the fia, and he refuses to acknowledge women as someone other than a secondary person. i mean, how many others has he done this with? we've got professional golfer lily, and a super smart degree in engineering, and we've got kika as a model and studying in fashion design. they're all highly accomplished women."

"mon cheri, i agree with you. i promise i do. but, the president barely treats us drivers as humans. his viewership and his money literally depends on us, and he doesn't have the decency to treat us nicely,"

that was true, lewis had to agree.

it was quiet for a few moments, and then hushed whispers. lewis leaned in closer to the door as he tried to make out the words, but he just couldn't.

"oh, hey lewis!" one of the mechanics said, clapping a hand on his back.

lewis immediately straightened, and made polite conversations. he really wanted to get back to listening to the conversation happening inside.

just as he was done with the conversation, the door opened, and charles greeted them, and the conversation began again.

for fucks sake.

jules

jules was always watching from the sky. he was always watching over his godson. after all, that was the duty of a godfather, wasn't it? to protect the godson when no one else could. to be there for the godson when no one else could. jules had promised charles' father that he would always look after his son, and not even death can stop jules.

he'd watched charles find y/n. he'd watched the way she supported him and helped him grow as a person. he's watched as she made him the happiest man on earth. he'd watched her celebrate every win with him, and comforted him through every loss.

it was safe to say that jules felt the proudest of his godson the day he proposed to y/n. charles was smart to never let her go. charles was smart to make sure that she stayed with him and loved him just like he loved her and wanted to stay with her.

it was the day of charles and y/n's wedding.

jules was there in spirit. he always was.

y/n was a sweetheart. she had saved him a seat, along with charles' father in the front row for charles. jules wasn't sure if she had told charles, but he knew his godson would be so thankful for it.

jules was there in his suit and tie, looking crisp, even if no one could see him. he sat on the seat reserved for him as he waited for the groom to walk down the aisle first.

he saw every person who ever cared about charles sitting there. family, friends, team, ex drivers, current drivers. it made jules smile. so many people loved charles. so many loved y/n as well. to see them all together in one place to celebrate their love was heartwarming.

the music began, and charles walked down the aisle with his groomsmen: pierre, carlos, and bryan. they smile and laugh with him, shaking his shoulders as tear gather in charles' eyes.

jules watched as charles' gaze roam across the mass of people sitting there. he waves slightly at a few. jules watched as charles' gaze finally settled on him. he watched as charles' tears fell at the realisation of what his fiance had done for him.

he watched as charles covered his face, silent sobs escaping him. and then, the music began, and the bride walked down the aisle. everyone stood, including jules.

the bride was smiling wide, a little bounce in her steps as if she couldn't wait to marry his godson. her hand was tucked in her father's elbow, and the other hand held a bouquet of lilies.

jules watched as she stood on the little podium in front of charles, smiling brightly while his tears mixed with his grin. the love in charles' eyes was as beautiful as the aurora borealis in the night sky.

the ceremony began, and they went through the usual process. jules had been to few weddings, though he didn't remember most of them anymore.

when it was time for the vows, charles broke down again as he thanked his bride for saving a spot for his dad and his godfather, that he didn't think of doing something like that despite how much he wanted them to be there on their wedding there. he thanked her and promised to love her forever. he promised to cherish her and always be there for her, and he promised that he would always be at her beck and call, because she was the greatest gift he'd ever gotten.

y/n cried as well. it surprised jules a little bit. maybe he wasn't expecting her to cry as well. but, it was nice to see. to see that their love for each other was so overwhelming that smiles could not contain it.

she said her vows as well. she told him that she knew how much he missed his father and godfather and she wanted to do something small that would make him feel closer to them. she told him how much she loved him and how much she's going to continue loving him. she promised him to be the first one jumping for every win, and be the first hug he needs when he's disappointed. she promised that she would hold onto his hand as long as he held onto her, and she promised to laugh at every joke he said, regardless of how funny or not funny it was.

almost everyone was in tears. jules was too.

when the priest finally said, "you may kiss your bride," the couple did not waste another second. charles' hands cupped her face, as she held onto his wrists, and they kissed for the first time as a married couple.

jules smiled.

he knew pushing y/n towards charles was a good idea.

he knew he'd made the right decision, even from the sky.

・┆✦ʚ♡ɞ✦ ┆・

i genuinely feel like my writing skills have massively deteriorated. im not even fishing. im just saying. i feel like it takes me one or two tries to get a particular driver right. i don't really pay as much attention to the other drivers as i do with lando, and also that i connect with lando a lot personality wise, so its easier for me to write him. anyways, i hope you like this! im sorry it took me so long to write this one! this is my prompt list, so y'all can select a number, give me a driver and i will write it as soon as possible! i also have a google form for a taglist if anyone's interested! you can sent in your requests here :)

taglist: @imlonelydontsendhelp ; @greantii ; @anamiad00msday ; @maketheshadowsfearyou ; @nocturnalherb16 ; @justaf1girl ; @peterholland04 ; @phobiccneel ; @winkev1 ; @alexxavicry

[syluslnd]

Hii love✨✨

If it’s ok with you i was wondering can you write one where he has been super busy lately and kept forgetting your dates and as much as you were understanding, you felt bad so he promised to makeup for your birthday but he get caught up at work again.

How he will react and compromise for it ??

sylus who forgot your birthday

You sat on the edge of the couch, your fingers tracing the seam of a throw pillow, lost in thought. The glow from the dim light in your living room cast long shadows across the room, making it feel colder, emptier.

You had told yourself not to get upset—that you understood how busy Sylus had been lately. He has the weight of entire missions on his shoulders, of course, he’s stretched thin. You had repeated that so many times over the past few weeks each time he had to cancel a date or when messages went unanswered for days at a time.

But this time… this time it was different. Today was your birthday and Sylus had forgotten.

The soft hum of your phone on the table pulled you from your thoughts. It was a message from him, brief as usual: “Sweetie, I’m sorry. I’ll make it up to you. Just been swamped. Soon, I promise.”

That was it. Another promise. Another “soon.” You felt the familiar pang of disappointment settle in your chest but this time it was sharper, more persistent. You swallowed hard, fighting the sting in your eyes. You had been so patient, so understanding. You had excused his absence time and time again. But now…now it felt like your own feelings had been set aside, like your importance had been brushed off.

You stared at the message your fingers hovering over the screen. Normally, you’d reply with a simple “It’s okay” followed by reassurance that you understood. That you weren’t upset. But tonight, that lie felt too heavy. So you left it unanswered.

A few hours later the sound of Sylus entering your apartment broke the silence. His footsteps were light, almost hesitant, as he walked toward you. “Kitten?” His voice was low soft—only ever that way with you. He appeared in the doorway, his usual sharp, commanding demeanor softened by the sight of you, curled up on the couch.

You didn’t look up. “Hey” you muttered, voice barely above a whisper.

He walked closer, standing before you. “Sweetie, I’m sorry” he repeated, his tone thick with exhaustion but his words felt rehearsed. “I lost track of time. Work’s been relentless.”

You nodded still not meeting his gaze your heart pounding in your chest. The urge to just accept his apology to say it didn’t matter, weighed heavily on you. But this time, the words wouldn’t come.

Sylus tilted his head, sensing the shift in your usual response. “Kitten… talk to me. What’s going on?”

You closed your eyes for a moment, gathering your courage. “It’s my birthday today” you whispered the words trembling as they escaped your lips. “you forgot.”

The silence that followed was suffocating. You could feel the tension building between you like the space around you had suddenly grown smaller, tighter.

His jaw clenched, his eyes darkening with realization. “Shit… I—” He knelt in front of you, his hands reaching for yours but you pulled them back, crossing your arms instead. “Sweetie, I didn’t mean to—”

“You’re always busy” you cut him off, voice shaking. “I know your work is important I get it, I really do. But you keep… missing things. Canceling plans. I try not to say anything because I don’t want to make things harder for you but…” You finally looked at him, your eyes glistening with unshed tears. “It hurts, Sylus. It hurts to feel like I’m not important enough.”

His eyes softened at your words and for a moment he looked almost… pained. His hand hovered near you, unsure of whether to touch you. “Kitten, you are important. You know that.”

“Am i ?” you asked, your voice breaking. “Because it doesn’t feel like it. Not when you forget something as important as today.”

Sylus’s breath hitched. He reached for you again more gently this time cupping your face in his large hands, his thumb brushing over your cheek. “I’m sorry” he said, his voice low and rough with guilt. “I fucked up. I should’ve been here. I should’ve been better for you.”

His usual stoic demeanor cracked and for the first time in a long time you saw vulnerability in his eyes. “I hate that I’ve made you feel like this.”

You wanted to give in to accept the apology and let it all go but something inside you kept pushing. “You keep saying you’re sorry but nothing changes” you said quietly. “I need to know that I matter to you. I need you to show me, not just tell me.”

Sylus let out a frustrated breath his hands dropping to his sides, the tension between you palpable. “You do matter. You matter more than anything.”

He stood, running a hand through his hair, pacing slightly his frustration turning inward. “I’ve been so caught up in everything else… I didn’t realize how much I’ve been hurting you. I never wanted to hurt you, sweetie.”

The room felt thick with the weight of unspoken emotions, his words hanging in the air. You watched him your heart aching torn between the deep love you had for him and the frustration that had been building for so long.

Finally, Sylus turned to face you again his gaze intense, filled with something raw. “I’ll do better. I swear, I’ll make it up to you. I can’t stand knowing that I let you down like this.”

You didn’t respond immediately, your own emotions swirling. You wanted to believe him, but the hurt was still fresh. “I don’t need grand gestures, Sylus” you said softly. “I just need you to be here. Really be here.”

He closed the distance between you in two strides, kneeling in front of you again, his hands resting on your knees. “I will. From now on… I will.”

You stared at him for a long moment before finally nodding though the ache in your chest hadn’t fully faded. Sylus gently pulled you into his arms holding you close as though he was afraid of losing you. His voice was barely a whisper against your hair. “I love you, kitten. I’m sorry I didn’t show it the way you needed.”

You let yourself relax into his embrace, your heart still heavy but slightly soothed by the sincerity in his words. It would take time but maybe—just maybe—things could change.

A week had passed since that night and true to his word Sylus had been more present, more attentive. But today, he had something different planned—something special.

He had insisted on keeping it a surprise driving you across the city with a small, knowing smile that kept you guessing. You loved surprises but with Sylus it was hard to predict what he had up his sleeve. So when the car finally pulled up to the mall, you were taken aback when he led you to the Build-A-Bear Workshop.

Your heart fluttered. Sylus hated malls, crowds, anything remotely cute or fluffy but he knew how much you loved plushies and this? This was so out of his comfort zone it almost made you laugh.

“You… brought me here?” you asked, incredulous, as you stared up at the storefront.

Sylus smirked his arm slipping around your waist, pulling you close. “You love this kind of thing, right?” His voice was smooth but there was a subtle unease in his tone, like he wasn’t entirely sure if he was doing this right.

You looked at him trying to hide your amusement. “I do… but you don’t.”

He shrugged his expression softening. “It’s not about me, kitten. Today’s about you.”

With that he pushed the door open and you stepped inside. The store was empty—completely deserted, except for one employee who stood at the counter, smiling warmly. You glanced around, frowning slightly. “Where is everyone?”

Sylus’ grip on your waist tightened slightly, his lips brushing your ear as he whispered, “Rented the place out. Just for us.”

Your eyes widened and you turned to face him. “You rented out the whole store?”

His smirk deepened. “Figured we’d need some privacy for this.” There was a glint of mischief in his eyes but you could tell he was serious about making this special.

Before you could say anything else the employee walked up to you, holding two plush bears in her arms. “Welcome! I’ve got a little surprise for you both.” She extended the plushies, one for each of you.

You took yours and couldn’t help the giggle that escaped when you realized—the bear looked just like you but it was completely naked. You glanced at the one in Sylus’s hand—it was a perfect match for him, also unclothed. The resemblance was uncanny, down to the smallest details.

“Wait” you said, laughter bubbling up in your chest. “These are supposed to be us?”

Sylus looked down at his bear, his brow furrowing slightly. “They are” he muttered, clearly uncomfortable. He held the plush like it was a foreign object, looking utterly out of place in the brightly colored whimsical environment. You couldn’t help but laugh again the sight of him—tall, broad and imposing—in a Build-A-Bear store, holding a tiny version of himself was almost too much.

“sweetie..don’t laugh” he grumbled, though there was a faint smile playing at the corner of his lips. “This was harder than I thought it’d be.”

“I’m not laughing at you” you managed between giggles. “I’m just… surprised.”

The employee gestured toward the walls lined with endless clothing options for the bears. “You two can dress them up however you like. We’ve got unlimited items for you to choose from, so go wild!”

You looked at Sylus, grinning. “Oh, this is going to be fun.”

Sylus shot you a wary glance as if he wasn’t entirely sure how he’d gotten himself into this. But he followed you over to the wall of tiny outfits, watching as you eagerly picked through the options, holding up various shirts, pants and accessories.

“Here, put this on your bear” you said, handing him a little leather jacket. It was almost comical how serious he looked as he tried to wrestle his bear into the jacket, his large hands clumsy with the delicate fabric.

He sighed heavily clearly out of his element and you couldn’t help but giggle again. “You’re doing great” you teased, leaning over to help him adjust the tiny jacket. “Very badass.”

He shot you a sidelong glance his expression softening at the sound of your laughter. “I look ridiculous.”

“No” you said, smiling as you dressed your own bear. “You look cute.”

He rolled his eyes but didn’t protest, his usual gruff demeanor softened by the fact that this—however awkward for him—was for you. He had gone through the trouble of planning something so completely opposite of who he was, all because he knew how much you loved it.

After a while you both had your bears fully dressed—yours in an adorable pastel outfit with a tiny skirt and sweater and Sylus’s bear looking every bit as tough as him in the leather jacket and sunglasses.

You turned to look at Sylus who was standing there, holding his bear like it was the most absurd thing in the universe but there was a softness in his gaze as he looked at you. “You’re happy?” he asked, his voice low.

You smiled up at him your heart swelling with affection. “I’m more than happy. This is perfect.”

He stepped closer pulling you into his arms, his bear tucked awkwardly under one arm as he leaned down to press a kiss to your forehead. “Good. I wanted to give you something that wasn’t just an apology… but something that shows I’m listening. That I care.”

You rested your head against his chest feeling the steady beat of his heart beneath your cheek. “You did” you whispered, your voice filled with emotion. “Thank you, Sylus.”

He pulled back slightly his eyes searching yours. “I’m not done making it up to you, kitten. This is just the start.”

You smiled softly, feeling the weight of his words. “I don’t need anything else. Just… this. Just you.”

His hand came up to cup your cheek, his thumb brushing gently over your skin. “You’ll always have me. I promise.”

For the first time in a while, the ache that had settled in your heart was replaced with warmth. You knew he meant it and as you stood there in the middle of the empty Build-A-Bear, holding your matching plushies, you realized that this—this silly, thoughtful gesture—meant more than any grand apology ever could. Sylus had shown up for you, in his own way and that was all you had ever really wanted.

[ariseur]

hi! may i req how cloud strife or maybe all ffvii men (if u want!) deal with a jealous reader? i saw ur jealousy hc's for them and it was sososo amazinf i love all of ur works sm !!! <33

# the color green 、 ffvii

✧˖*°࿐ featuring ; cloud strife, zack fair, reno, sephiroth, angeal hewley, genesis rhapsodos,

✧˖*°࿐ warnings ; sfw, established relationship, gender neutral reader, intended lowercase, individual characters — not grouped together/polyamorous, jealousy (obviously), genesis being a diva as per usual, zack calling u pretty, post nibelheim seph being lowkey manipulative and dismissive, lmk if i missed anything ^.^!!

✧˖*°࿐ note ; i’ve been meaning to get to this request but it’s been sitting in my inbox for a while (*´-`). . i did have fun making this though!! i forgot how nice it feels to make headcanons and include everybody lol. (and yes i know every headcanon post i make i change formats shh. . ) please request more!! i love them!!

- cloud strife, as clever as he can be, can also have his moments of density — people will flirt with him and it’ll fly right over his head sometimes. it’ll either be that, or he won’t know what to do in response, and will instead blurt out whatever response pops into his head at the moment.

- he’s not a bad looking guy (far from it actually), and he gets a fair amount of attention from women so i wouldn’t blame you for maybe getting a tad bit jealous . . . but i assure you that there’s no need to feel jealous with cloud; and he’ll let you know, too!

- when he realizes you’re jealous (whether that’s because you told him or because he somehow by some miracle notices), he’s so?? confused?? what do you care if she was flirting with him? isn’t it common sense that he’s only got eyes for you?

- it’ll probably come off a lot more curt and maybe even a little sassy with the way he responds, but it’s just because he doesn’t get it. cloud honestly does not care if somebody were to hit on him because at the end of the day, he comes back home to you — like a cat finding its way back on your windowsill, occasionally pawing at the glass for you to let him in.

- it’s even crazier if someone were to touch him because he’d just shrug them off. kinda like how when jessie hugged him at the end of that one mission in ffvii remake? “are you really that desperate?” as he’s trying to push her off him lol. cloud is kinda touch evasive as it is with most people, so it’d just be an uncomfortable situation all around for all parties.

- if you guys were to have a conversation, he’d definitely be pretty concise and short with it — that or he’ll unnecessarily go on a little awkward tangent as he kind of word vomits, but he essentially repeats the same thing; maybe throw in a huff of an ‘i love you’ in there somewhere. .

- (don’t think much of it, it’s not like i’ll do this every time, he says — as he’s pulling you in closer for a hug while his hand comes up to rest at the back of your head.)

ᯓ ᢉ𐭩. . .

- ever the restless puppy, zack fair. another one you most certainly won’t have to worry about! zack is, like cloud, very loyal and only has eyes for you. the only difference between them is that zack’s no tsundere and he’ll gladly admit that he only loves you!

- you can’t blame people for possibly flirting with soldier boy over here, he’s practically perfect — but with the opportunity that you get a little jealous, zack has no problem reassuring you.

- he might be a little oblivious though, like cloud at times. if it’s not as direct then he’ll simply view it as innocent, only because he’s head heels for you! you might have to tell him that it makes you uncomfortable to get his attention on the matter. he’ll apologize profusely for not realizing sooner, kisses scattered all around your face as you try to tell him it’s okay but he just won’t let up (￣▽￣). .

- he’s not above a liiiitle teasing though. . might take advantage of the situation and throw in a little playful tease about how much you love him, but it’s all in good fun — paired with him wrapping his arm around you and a boyish grin thrown your way.

- zack is so adorable, if somebody were to ever say, “your partner must be so lucky to have a guy like you at home,” in attempts to maybe fish out a confession that he’s (hopefully) single, he actually does not get it and will genuinely go on an hour long rant about how he’s so lucky to have you.

- (yes, he’ll even bust out photos of you that he carries on him and go, ‘yeah! that’s them! aren’t they so pretty?’)

- he’s also not above telling somebody off if they just can’t take a hint. he’ll start off with a little “i’m taken!” and a small laugh to lighten it up. but if they keep going then he’ll just hit them with a short, “not interested,” and move on with his day. god forbid anybody touch him either, he’d be so weirded out and would gag at the thought all day long.

ᯓ ᢉ𐭩. . .

- reno’s a nightmare if you’re ever jealous — only because he thinks it’s so cute that you get all fired up over people having the hots for him (even though. . he’s like such a dork lmfao), so he can’t help himself when he teases you, poking fun at the way you smack his hand away when he tries to point out the way you sulk in the corner at his quips.

- another one who doesn’t really understand it, since he’s obviously so in love with you. . . albeit, he’s obviously not above making a few harmless jokes at it.

- reno’s so sassy i honestly believe that he has the potential to make someone cry with how dismissive he is; like if anybody would touch him, he’d honestly just shrug them off or smack their hand away and cross his arms. he’s not one to have big reactions to these sort of things, but even if you didn’t tell him you were jealous, wtf are they touching him for??

- i don’t really see him trying to make you jealous to get a reaction though, reno feels smug enough knowing that you care about him so much.

- at first it might give him a little ego boost if it’s just a little praise or two — but honestly, i can imagine him actually being disgusted if someone were to make such bold advances towards him 😭 like touching him, complimenting him or his techniques, and he’ll honestly just make a face and walk away.

- he will admit though, he does think it’d be pretty hot if you confronted the person yourself.

- so annoying in the aftermath though. ‘i’ve gotta say — green’s a pretty nice color on you’ as he’s over here wrapping his arms around your waist while you curse him and try to push him away. he’s so irritating but i just wanna smooch him so bad.

ᯓ ᢉ𐭩. . .

- sephiroth is ultimately very amused with this, regardless of pre or post nibelheim — and his reactions might be a little frustrating because he’s literally just staring at you with a small smirk on his face as you try to talk to him. but, he’s definitely not something to worry about either!

- a gorgeous man who has a famed reputation, i don’t blame you for getting jealous; especially since he has a whole fanclub and doesn’t get to spend a lot of time with you during the week.

- he obviously knows what these fans are doing, he’s not oblivious to their flirtations but he just ignores them most of the time. you, most likely, pay more attention to them as they fawning over him on the online forums or are crowding and recognizing him when he goes places.

- however, seph’s pretty observant so he’ll notice when you’re jealous or feel uncomfortable. he’ll lean over and ask if you wanna go someplace else, somewhere quieter. at the end of the day, you handle it how you want to handle it and he’ll respect that — whether you confront the person / people or whether you decide to just talk to him about it.

- however, he’s not really one for a pleasure in public appearances so i don’t see him like walking with you or any sort of pda where everybody can see though. maybe he’s caught on camera walking over to you or something. . but other than that, he prefers to keep your love a little private for the sake of intimacy. why does your love need to be televised just to prove it? he may be a little awkward at times but he can show you he loves you any other day of the week.

- and with post-nibelheim seph. . i don’t think there’s any opportunities to be jealous sorry （ ; ; ). during this time, he has a very close eye on you and when you’re not with him, he’s always with you or around you in some way or form.

- with the possibility that you are, he’ll simply assure you that your worries are silly. a little dismissive but he tries to mean well. overall though (no matter what time period this is in), sephiroth will always reassure you that he’s yours and there’s nothing to worry about. nothing could come in the way between him and you ^3^

ᯓ ᢉ𐭩. . .

- angeal hewley is actually such husband material i need to marry him so bad. he’s like the person you have to worry the least about, i can’t even see you getting jealous over him only because this man knows all the right words on how to make you feel so loved.

- but alas, these are jealousy headcanons, are they not? so!! on the off case that you are indeed jealous because somebody’s flirting with angeal, i’m sure he notice fairly quick because like sephiroth; he’s very observant when it comes to you.

- for a man who won’t hesitate to make you breakfast and kiss you goodbye before long missions every single time, i’d expect nothing less. he’d ask you what’s wrong and he’d insist that the two of you talk about it — whether it’s because of people or just because of how little off time he can spend with you considering he’s a first class and all. . .

- although he doesn’t get as much attention as sephiroth or genesis with the fan clubs and forums, i’m sure there are some people who’d still be interested and attempt at flirting with him or invading his boundaries — to which he’d always respectfully decline and instead shift the attention to how he has you, his loving partner.

- he, too, is a little awkward when it comes to this stuff and verbal reassurance, but he doesn’t like for you to bottle things up and would always assure you that you can tell him about anything on your mind.

- if it’s work related, then he’d try his hardest to finish up all of his work and ask lazar if he can take a day off or two. . which will essentially be angeal’s only day(s) off for a while considering all the stuff he has to do as a SOLDIER, sorry :(

- he always comes home to you with praises after these conversations, though!! it’s engraved into his mind and he’s always conscious of it every interaction he has with you, wondering how he could slip something in there that’d wriggle into the grooves of your brain . . telling you that he does appreciate the things you do for him, and that he’s absolutely whipped for you . .

- (it’s a 50/50 thing though, he’ll either be very mature and sophisticated with his words or he’ll struggle with wording it and be a tad bit awkward lol)

ᯓ ᢉ𐭩. . .

- you thought reno was bad? wait til you see the absolute FIEND that genesis rhapsodos becomes.

- genesis, being the drama queen that he ultimately is, will unfortunately be as irritating as he can be when it comes to getting you riled up over him. it swells his ego a little too much and he will most definitely tease you about it (-.-;). . .

- we all know how many fangirls he has, and he’s all very flattered by the attention but he doesn’t really acknowledge them all that much once he’s in a relationship with you! he’s very much in love with you and even if he’s a little theatrical and cliché about it, he does genuinely care for you.

- but. . if he found out that you’re getting all jealous over some fangirls then he might just use that as a clutch to get you even more jealous.

- like reno, he also finds you very attractive when you’re jealous and while i love the man, he’s definitely the type of person to film a girl fight in the middle of public. he might even flirt back with someone to get you to do something about it (like the absolute menace he is).

- once it genuinely upsets you though, he’ll back off and confront you about it — in a much more gentle or overall better way than before. ooh, if he makes you cry or fight with him then he won’t stop beating himself up about it though. . which is a little silly considering how he started it in the first place.

- he’ll find you later, sitting next to you in a silence that overtakes the room — perhaps to you, it’s awkward, but to him, it’s pleasing. he might recite something he’s written for you or simply just say that he’s sorry, that he does care for you and would like you to care for him too. (it’s up to you whether you want to punch him or kiss him, idk both options look pretty good to me).

- genesis you beautiful man you, why must you be so frustrating sometimes.

𐙚 requests are open — february twenty-third, 2025

𐙚 comment to be added to taglist ; @xiansiii @alieeelinn @ch3rryfiles @snoopicle

[koiir]

SWEETEST LOVER

Blue lock boys who are the BEST lovers ( I’m bias) Relationships with them { not proofread }

ᡣ𐭩 •｡ꪆৎ ˚⋅ Chigiri, hiori, reo, isagi, kurona

CHIGIRI H.

Chigiri is the definition of “best friend and partner” he’s rather open to you (having known for years) and also being the person who’s the best boyfriend you can could ask for.

The advice he gives is one of harsh criticism yet the most truthful, many would be surprised by how blunt he can be with you although it shows in how he cares and truly only wants the best for you. If opening your eyes with a hard truth will help then he will take that route.

Although of course, he isn’t heartless. He comforts you with a warm smile, heart beating at how attentive he becomes with you. Giving you the princess treatment one would die for. He knows comfort can differ in various ways, so he will always try and communicate on what you need.

I feel as though chigiri struggles with communication concerning his wants, so he tries to grow in order to be the best version of himself he can give you. Yet there will be moments where this can “problem” can arise and he will always realize his faults.

Other than that, his knack for his wellbeing swells into you as well. Hair is rather important for the guy, so when he comes to you with a grin about a new hair secret, expect a days worth of hair care. The two of you are seen as rather “gossipers” yet you two just find anything and everything interesting. Really, anything with chigiri can turn into an interesting conversation. Thus making him an amazing boyfriend and best friend in one<33 ( I could go on about him but I’ll save that for later)

HIORI Y.

SO UNDERRATED I LUV HIORI. Ugh he’s the sweetest I mean cmonnn…

With his already calm and polite demeanor, falling in love with him is that of a warm spring that flourishes into a bond greater than words can say.

A quick learner, can easily pick up your moods and will give it his all for you! Very much a giver and will cherish whatever you give him, hiori becomes emotional seeing how much you give to him, already viewing your love the best thing he could every ask for.

From his childhood, he was told he was loved, although feeling it would come and go. Yet when you come into the picture, it’s as if he experiences the feeling of being loved for the first time ever. His past one of hallow that now with you, it beams with hope and joy, making him the more doting on you with showing how much he truly cherishes what you have given to him.

The type of guy who would let you drag him anywhere, as his face is filled with adoration for you, soft smile evident as he lets your body take the lead as he follows you to no end. Out and about, would definitely rub your wrist gently before crossing the street whispering a faint “be careful” that causes your heart to race in seconds.

Can’t forgot how he would definitely, want you to game with him. Even if you don’t he finds a way for you to be near or engage with him. Whether that be you seated next to him or him lying across you, the peace hiori has in being close to you is infinite. A safe space he never wishes to let go of.

Seems squishy (don’t ask)

ISAGI Y.

GREEN FLAG I REPEAT ULTIMATE GREEN FLAG. Might be bias but cmon it’s isagi

The boyfriend who literally will do ANYTHING you wish for (as long as it’s reasonable ofc) Follows you around like a lovesick puppy as he comments on places he thinks you would like or you two should go to. Will love to get stuff where it compliments the other, almost as if something that matches.

He once asked you what you were going to wear and showed up with a similar color combo, mind you he bought you two the same shoes for days where you want to match.

The kind of guy who will hold eye contact whenever you talk, even if you can’t hold it with him because of how intense his gaze is. He will continue looking at you as id you’re all he can stare at. How can someone make you flustered without anything at all?? That’s isagi for you

Isagi is someone you admire, someone you learn from even as you two grow in the relationship. His kind heart giving you the courage to try new things as he supports you all the way, words of encouragement making a hue of light shine in your life.

Overall, a loving caring guy who always has your back and a cutie

BACHIRA M.

Bachira just like anyone has his…quirks. Although nothing severe to the point of destruction or hurting you. If anything he’s the most loyal and treats you with such care, fearing that one day you might perish or realize he’s not so called normal.

His insecurities one that you know from the beginning, tending the wounds he has held from years of the past. His reluctance to thank you with the best he can give you, his affection and loyalty to you one of scarce of losing you. He can’t fathom this, you with him. Together. So it’s only natural he wishes to show you what others cannot see.

There’s never a dull moment with him, his vibrant persona melting into you as you intoxicate in the newfound confidence he gives you. Bachira is the type to move you out of your comfort zone, making a break to see you in a new light that he’s lucky enough to see and be the cause for.

His affection spreads throughout every aspect, in public he resembles a dog that clings onto its owner that holds eyes filled with adoration.

His warm hands allowing for yours to bask in his warmth, feeling more as he squeezes yours and grins from ear to ear viewing your flushed expression. “There’s that face I adore oh so much!”

Eyes wander to your figure as bachira sees the shiver in your figure, cold winds swirling around causing you to feel the cold sensation of the winds. His embrace eternal, fitting like a puzzle as he snuggles up behind you swaying your bodies side to side. The norm would be teasing words, yet for now he embraces the delight with you in his arms.

Ah bachira

KURONA R.

Cutest boy I mean cmon he has shark teeth

No matter the time being, kurona can’t fathom that you’re truly his, his mornings being filled with a lovesick smile at the thought of you.

His teeth hold many stories, the most memorable being how insecure he is because of them, smile showing less due to this fact. But the day you tell him to smile, hands on his cheeks as you gaze into his eyes, the crack in his lips breaking as he smiles at you softly.

It’s only natural for kurona to want to be the reasons for your smiles, indulging in what will make your smile come to fruition so he can also gift you with his smile.

His adoration for sharks weaves into you, no matter what he makes a correlation between you. Expect matching trinkets of any shark related item. Plushies that greet you in a pair that hold eachother, his lips spilling the words of “look, it’s us”

What may come to a surprise is his ability to make you swoon with his words, maybe not directly, but on paper. The reassurance kurona needs is spilled onto messages late at night, showing his vulnerability on text because he cannot bear with how you might respond. He knows you would comfort him, although he knows his heart will experience speed to limits unknown.

So when morning dew comes and you wake up with his messages, your heart grows fond seeing just how much the boy wants you to know, his heart is all yours and he wishes to hold it for the eternity to come.

a/n; MONTHSS of not posting anything…prob cause I’m almost out of school and have inspo

edit; guys I’m sorry reo wasn’t added my ass was just tired after writing for bachira😞

[mimimui]

hellooo i saw your 'genshin men asking for a kiss' and i loved it sm your writing is amazing <333

can i request relationship headcanons for the genshin men. specifically alhaitham but idm who else you add

stay cool and have a good day/night :)

genshin boys as your boyfriend

includes: alhaitham, scaramouche, kazuha, diluc, kaeya, childe, xiao

tags: established relationship, endearments, fluff, not proofread, non-mortal/adeptus reader in xiao's

a/n: thank you so much ♡⸜(˶˃ ᵕ ˂˶)⸝♡ aaaah i am back after being mia..! the writers block is beating me up so hard rn + its 3am :') i wrote each part in different time frames so the writing might seem inconsistent aghuahgu i hope its still ok :( anyways, as always .. enjoy !

ALHAITHAM

he asked you to be his s/o while you were playing tcg together. you were in the middle of your turn when he asked you, and it'd be an understatement to say you were shocked.

(y/n): i'll use this support ca- alhaitham: will you be my s/o? (y/n): what? (shocked) alhaitham: what? (questioning)

while alhaitham is a bit aloof, he does loves teasing you. he would hide your things and help you look for the lost item like he doesn't know where it is.

when you're eating outside, he would step on your feet under the table. you can confront him about it all you want, but he will keep acting innocent.

if he's standing behind you, be wary because he might just throw his coat over your head as a joke, and then act like he did nothing.

alhaitham: do you want help putting on my coat? (y/n): seriously, haitham? alhaitham: yes? i'm seriously asking if you want my help.

when it comes to cooking, he'd leave you to do it. alhaitham would rather look forward to a meal you cook rather than a meal he helped make.

dinners are usually quiet, but if you want to tell him about the person that skipped in front of you in line today, then he's all ears.

the first time he told you he loved you, you were giving him a gift. you were smiling so brightly when giving it to him that he didn't know whether to be thankful for the gift or for you.

or at least you think that was the first time he said he loved you.

it was actually when you were asleep the first time you slept over. a very meaningful "i love you" was whispered softly in your ear.

SCARAMOUCHE

he brought you somewhere with a nice view. he grabbed your hand without warning, and when you asked him where he was taking you, he said, "no need to be nervous, just want you to see something."

(y/n): thank you for bringing me here, scara. scaramouche: you're my s/o, there is no need to thank me. (y/n): i'm your s/o...? scaramouche: are you not informed about that or what?

it turns out that scaramouche planned to ask you a long time ago, and from the amount of times he's rehearsed in his head, his mind convinced him that he already asked you.

you laughed at him when you witnessed the moment he realized he forgot to actually ask you. he huffed at your reaction.

he acts annoyed whenever you ask to try on his hat, but his actions contradict his words as he places it on your head.

scaramouche: there are a lot of places where you can get hats, i don't even know (places hat on your head) why you want mine. (y/n): :D scaramouche: if it falls, i'll laugh at you. (y/n): >:(

scaramouche would make you food if you ask him to. he's glad to do it, but he wouldn't want you to thank him. he thinks thanking him for things he's happy to do is a waste of effort.

it's somewhat his unspoken rule to never leave you alone at the table. even if he doesn't join you for the meal, he'd sit down just to accompany you while you eat.

he denied it when you heard him tell you he loved you. the three words escaped his lips when you were busy picking fruits together. or, rather, you were the one picking fruits while he holds them.

you asked him to repeat what he said, but he was quick to reply with "it'd be a waste of effort to repeat what i said."

but he knows. and you know. you both know he loves you.

KAZUHA

while he was out on sea, he wrote you a letter asking you to be his. along with all the other letters he wrote you, he made sure this was was sent out especially.

(y/n): welcome back, kazuha! about your letter... kazuha: yes, what about it? (y/n): my answer is yes. kazuha: i'm glad. thank you, (y/n).

he loves taking you out on adventures. even when he doesn't have a certain goal in mind for the day, kazuha will always find an excuse to bring you along with him.

you will always find him surrounding himself in nature. thanks to his extraordinary sense of hearing, he enjoys being outside even more. the world has a lot to offer.

one day, you ask him what his favorite sound of nature is. immediately, without fail, his reply is 'your voice', which you're flustered by.

(y/n): that doesn't even make any sense... i asked about your favorite sound of nature. kazuha: the world is full of nature, correct? (y/n): your point being? kazuha: you're my favorite sound of nature because you are my world, (y/n).

you both take turns cooking, always excited to try each other's new recipes. it's become sort of a competition of who can suprise the other one more.

his reaction is the cutest when you compliment his dish. if you're happily chewing the food he fed you, watch out because his hands will pinch your cheeks.

you two were hanging out one night, and you asked him to create a poem for you on the spot. he liked the idea, and immediately got to it.

without any hesitation, without thinking twice about it, he ended his poem with a very sweet "i love you."

when you stayed silent afterwards, kazuha got nervous. but his nervous expression soon washed away when you wrapped your arms around him, complimenting his impromptu-poem-writing abilities.

DILUC

he was closing up the tavern for the day, and you two were the only one there after work hours. he decided to take his chances and ask you right then and there.

diluc: can you pass me the wash cloth? (y/n): sure! diluc: can you fix the chairs? (y/n): sure! diluc: can you be mine? (y/n): sur- wait.

he's never said it outloud, but diluc actually enjoys having senseless conversations with you. just last night you told him he reminded you of an owl, which he found amusing, and he asked you to explain why.

whenever diluc takes shifts at the tavern, you'd be somewhere around helping clean tables or wash dishes. he has enough staff at angel's share, but he appreciates your assistance nonetheless.

if you know how to play chess, he would regularly ask you to play against him. he thinks it's a great game to play while also being able to converse with others. he loves talking to you.

(y/n): the main character realized—check—his feelings too late, and lost the love of his life to someone else. it's sad. diluc: what happened—oh, good move—to the main character after that? (y/n): he was never able to express his true feelings to her. he should've taken the chance. diluc: hm.. i agree. he was too coward when he had the opportunity. and checkmate, by the way. (y/n): wh- hey! i didn't see that move! diluc: better luck next time, my dear.

when you offer to cook dinner for him instead of the maids, diluc doesn't try to hide his smile. you've prohibited him from entering the kitchen, wanting to cook something for him all by yourself.

he will always stand by the archway and watch you cook. you go over to him occasionally, asking him to taste some parts of the meal you're making. these are some of his favorite moments with you.

it was when you were eating dinner that he first told you he loved you. you had just finished cooking a meal, and you were sharing details from your day with each other while eating.

halfway through the meal, he says, "i've been wanting to tell you something all day. may i?"

as you nod your head, he tells you he loves you. or, rather, he tells you he's in love with you. but what's the difference? diluc is all yours.

KAEYA

you brought klee back to the knights of favonius' headquarters after playing with her outside all day. albedo and jean thanked you, but kaeya wanted to express more than just gratitude.

kaeya: klee always returns happy whenever you're the one bringing her back. (y/n): she's precious. i'd do anything to keep her smiling. kaeya: likewise. but i also want to keep you smiling, sweetheart. (y/n): what do you mean? kaeya: be mine, (y/n), and i promise i'll always make you happy.

you, klee, and kaeya are always seen running around mondstadt. not only in the city, but also around the mountains. you'd all go find a big, empty space for klee to blow up.

rest assured he will always invite you for a drink, even if it's the morning. you've rejected about 90% of his offers, but he will always, always, make sure to invite you.

he is one call away when it comes to you. you have something urgent and needs his help? he's on it. you simply just miss him? he misses you too, he's on his way to see you.

(y/n): kaeya, aren't you supposed to be working right now? what would acting grandmaster jean say? kaeya: i missed you. that should be enough reason. (y/n): kaeya. kaeya: what? just wanted to see your face, sweetheart. i- ow! okay, okay, i'll go back now!

kaeya really enjoys when you cook for him. of course, he'll step in to help you, but the thought of you making him his favorite food is so heartwarming.

he insists on feeding you, even embarrassing you sometimes by pretending the spoon is a crystalfly and your mouth the cave it's about to fly into.

he first told you he loved you immediately after you agreed to be his. after you said 'yes' to his confession, he was quick to tell you those three words, and your heart fluttered at his boldness.

he will never forget to tell you he loves you. when he greets you good morning, when you drop by to pick up klee, when you come back to drop off klee, and so many more instances.

there was never a moment you doubted his love for you. he constantly reminds you of it, and kaeya will never let you forget it. he loves you. so much.

CHILDE

he had it all planned out when he asked you to be his s/o. he made restaurant reservations at your favorite place, and even made sure it was on a day where not much people visited.

childe: (y/n), will you be mine? (y/n): are you serious? yes! childe: you are the only one i've ever been serious about. (y/n): you're so corny.

whenever he gets back from missions, he always makes sure to bring you back a little gift or a souvernir. one time, he brought you back a ruin hunter eye because "you're the light of my life" he says. it didn't make any sense.

the first time he brought you to snezhnaya, he wrapped you in so many layers that you were better off rolling on the ground than walking.

he absolutely loves it when you play with his siblings. when he comes home tired, he'll immediately be energized if he sees you and his siblings spending time together.

(y/n): ajax, join us! we could use another person to play tag. childe: do i get a kiss if i win? (y/n): ...i was just kidding, you don't have to play with us anymore. childe: hey! okay, okay, i'll join. no kiss needed, i swear!

cooking is one of his favorite activities to do with you. doing something so loving and domestic as cooking with someone he loves is heartwarming.

no matter how much you try to keep yourself clean, childe will find a way to get you messy. he says you can't blame him if you can never catch him wiping his hands on your shirt.

he wasn't the first one to tell you he loved you. his siblings did it for him, actually. well, who was going to stop them? childe was asleep, and you weren't.

he brought you all on a camping trip outside snezhnaya, and he promptly passed out first after story-telling time. as you were cleaning up the campfire, his siblings all walked over to you.

"(y/n), our big brother loves you very much."

it was very random, but very sweet. you smiled at them as you gave them a hug each, asking them why they were suddenly telling you this.

"if you leave him, you leave us, and we don't want you to leave. he loves you a lot, we swear!"

XIAO

being uninterested in relationships, neither of you ever asked each other. but you've been together for as long as you could remember, and your memory goes back for centuries.

(centuries ago) (y/n): xiao, can you promise not to leave me by myself? xiao: that's a hard promise to keep. (y/n): but you'll try? xiao: ...yes.

xiao has never been the type to express much of what he was feeling—if he felt anything at all. unlike you, he has never bothered to fully understand mortals.

you thrive around the people of liyue harbor, and xiao will always find you casually strolling around or stopping to pet a cat you found on the sidewalk.

when xiao rests at wangshu inn, you find yourself accompanying him, staying with him on the highest balcony. this is the only time you accompany him though, as he has his duties to eliminate evil.

(y/n): need any help? xiao: you always ask, and i always say no. (y/n): well, you might need me one day. xiao: we've been together for centuries. you know i'm capable enough. (y/n): i know. you always have been. xiao: rest easy, (y/n). i'll be here. (y/n): good night, xiao.

food has never really been a problem for either of you, but if you want to treat yourself to a mortal meal, xiao will come along with you. with enough convincing, of course.

you eat at wangshu inn, and chef yanxiao prepares your meals. eating with xiao is quiet, but if you were to start a conversation, he will always reply.

he's never told you that he loves you, at least not directly. his actions will speak for him—one of them being always ridding the path you're taking of monsters.

whenever xiao has to leave you at the inn, he will never fail to tell you to "rest easy" before he leaves. he has sworn to himself to protect you, and eliminate all evil that might affect you.

his duty is to protect liyue, but it wouldn't hurt to make you his duty as well, right?

thanks for reading (˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶)

[annab-nana]

Hi Anna!🥺 I have a request for your winter wonderland sleepover🥺

Scenario: told parents about SO and now you have to rope someone into it for the holiday with Eddie🥺🥺

please i love this request sooo much!!

warnings: not proofread

❀ masterlist ❀

why?

that was the only question you could ask yourself as you hung up the phone.

why?

why in the world did i do that?

why did i say that?

you had to talk this out with someone and there was only one person who could help you make sense of this. so, you got in your car and drove to the trailer park.

"hey- woah," eddie started to greet you when he opened the door, but you were on a mission, beelining it to his bedroom. he just shut the door and followed you there. when he passed through the doorway into his room, he saw you lying on your back on his bed with your hands covering your face.

being your best friend, he could normally sense if the issue at hand was a more serious one or a dramatized one. today, he was picking up the vibe that it was the latter, so he crawled into bed beside you and copied your actions.

"why are we laying here like this?" he asked out loud, his voice muffled by his own hands.

when you responded, he couldn't make out many of the words you'd said. "can you repeat that? i only got because, christmas, and parents."

you lifted your palms up off your mouth but kept your eyes hidden by your fingers. "because i'm an idiot. i didn't want my family nagging me again about not having a boyfriend yet, so i told them there is someone when there isn't so now, i have to find someone in the next two weeks or show up at my parents' house with no one and get interrogated even more so than i would've if i had just kept my mouth shut."

once done with your explanation, you let your palms drop back down over your mouth and groaned into them. your body rolled over onto your stomach and closer to eddie. he moved onto his side and brought his hand to your back.

"hey," he started softly while rubbing between your shoulder blades in a comforting manner. "i'm sure it'll work itself out. how many times have you gotten yourself into something and figured a way out? too many to count, so i don't doubt you'll do it again."

suddenly, you lifted your head out of your hands and looked at him, a mischievous glint in your eye.

"that's your not-very-good-idea face," eddie commented. "i'm a little worried."

"i don't know what you're talking about. i only come up with great ideas and i've got another right now. but, it'll take some convincing."

"just spit it out already."

"you love me, don't you, eddie?"

"okay, now you're scaring me."

"well, i was thinking you could step in and be my fake boyfriend for the holidays, just to get my family off my back, you know. you don't have to kiss me or anything. at most, you'll have to hold my hand or kiss my forehead or be close to me. but, it's perfect because you know me so well already. we'll just have to come up with a backstory. eddie, i'll do whatever to make it up to you whether that be do your laundry, help with d and d stuff, do your homework, whatever, but pleas-"

eddie cut you off. "i'll do it."

you weren't expecting it to be that easy. "really?"

"yeah, why not? wayne's working on christmas so i'm free anyway and based on the stories you tell, i've always wanted to meet your uncle charlie. i get something to do on christmas and get to hang with my best friend. i would've said yes before the whole speech, but now that i know i can get some stuff out of you, i might cash in some of those favors later."

you jumped to wrap your arms around him. "oh, thank you, thank you, thank you, eddie! you don't know how much a relief this is."

"yeah," eddie spoke, trying to ignore the way his heart was racing. that was the one thing he forgot about before agreeing to this whole thing. it was going to be hard to keep his crush on you hidden, but for you, he would risk it all. "no problem."

remember to support writers & reblog :)

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tag list: @fiction-is-life @jellyfishbeansontoast

[mr-leach]

I think Richard Parker has totally shaken my sense of trust and how I talk to myself when trying to exercise trust. I mean, it goes further back than that....there have been many instances in my life where I ran a worst case scenario in my head, convinced myself I was overblowing things, and then turned out to be mostly if not completely right. But Richard Parker really was such an outlandish and brazen case of exploitation that it felt impossible. Like get out of town, there's no way. But it was true!! Every small thing I let go, every strange thing he said that could have easily meant something else innocuous...it was all real. He really stabbed me in the back and told me to thank him for it.

It makes trying to rationalize through any bad feeling I get next to impossible. I let myself get duped so many times, over so many years, why would I ever do it again? Like what am I, an idiot?

It's especially bad when it comes to my anxiety around being misinterpreted or misunderstood precisely because he was so good at using that against me. Making sure I never had the chance to write my thoughts in text so he could pretend I did or didn't say something and I wouldn't be able to go back and see the evidence. Encouraging me to ramble in circles or repeat myself to cast doubt on what was said. And then deciding later what he would prefer me to have said instead and putting THAT to writing, expecting me to just accept it. Obviously not everyone who does misinterpret me does it in such a calculated and insidious way, but it still happens enough in other places, like when talking to the shop steward for my union (she is very old and forgets things a lot, but would rather die than admit she forgot something) or my doctor (minimizes just about everything I tell him either because of some bias he has or because he simply does not care about his job as much as he would like me to think and it would be less work if I just went home and took a tylenol about it) and it only reinforces the ever constant fear that what I say means nothing, never matters, or hell just literally comes out differently and I somehow don't even know it.

And the thing is it doesn't really matter all that much that I can identify just how disordered that way of thinking is. Like I am fully aware that it is bonkers to believe that the words coming out of my literal mouth sound like completely different words to other people, or that the meaning of words that I know to mean one thing actually just mean another thing to everyone else except me, but that's still how I feel sometimes and it terrifies me. What if I'm leading someone to believe one thing when that's not at all what I'm trying to covey, what if I'm accidentally agreeing to something I would never actually agree to, what if by choosing to speak at all I'm complicit in whatever misunderstanding inevitably occurs as a result. Just knowing that those worries have no basis in reality doesn't do anything to make them go away because every time I do manage to convince myself that it's silly to think that way I keep being proven right.

A lot of CBT attempts to mitigate worry and disordered thinking by having you reassure yourself that the worst case scenario you're imagining is not actually possible. You're taught to use logic to help navigate your emotional response. But that kind of doesn't do squat when you happen to be right. And I keep being right. Richard Parker was the worst by far but like I feel like it rewired my brain entirely. When your roommate actually is just as cartoonishly nasty as your imagination it kind of makes it impossible to ignore the irrational fears you have about anything.

I need therapy for this, I know I do. Not CBT obviously lol but I do need some way of getting past this cause I don't think this is any way to move through the world. Whether I can actually access therapy is uncertain but I know I need it. Until then posting into the void will have to do.

[eccentricgrace]

TBIs, with a brief history of Bastille || IronDad + Spideychelle

summary: mj 'accidentally' gets caught in the crossfire of battle and ends up with a concussion - tony babysits, peter stresses

tags: protective peter parker, babysitter tony stark, fluff, humour, mj infodumps on history, mj tolerates tony for peter's sake, they both love that nerd

wc: 1,736

cross-posted on wattpad under the same name!

By all means, and in every definition, Tony doesn't like it when kids get injured— kids, meaning, anybody under eighteen, and more recently, anybody under twenty-five. Jesus, he's getting old— which is a pretty fair rule. Nobody likes when kids get hurt. If you do, you're probably a sick and twisted individual that Tony would love to spit on in a jail cell, or you're Rhodey binging old reruns of AFV instead of doing government paperwork.

Anyways, Tony tries very hard to keep any young ones, chickadees, rascals, scallywags, munchkins, younglings, whippersnappers, juveniles, the youth, scamps, rapscallions, whatever you want to call them, away from Avengers battlefields; whether they be space, a street, or some secret third thing.

So he's not exactly sure how this one slipped through his fingers. Curly-haired Michelle Jones, who he'd had the short pleasure of meeting at the last Parker extended family dinner. She had given him quite the scare.

("Shit! What are you doing here?" Tony tossed a chunk of building off into the street and swung back to meet her. "You should not be here. It's dangerous, kid. You're smart, you should know that."

Michelle heaved, a crowbar held in a white-clawed grip. She had blood dripping from her nose, which she wiped off with her torn sleeve.

"I followed Spider-Man," she said, weightily. "He escaped from gym class. I got worried."

Tony decided he would wisely think about the parameters of all that entailed later. He refocused on the way Michelle was holding a hand to the back of her head. "You're bleeding, did you get hit?"

She nodded, taking another deep breath. The blood is dripping down her arm, soaking her shirt. "Well, yeah, genius. And, also, I think I have a concussion."

Then Tony saw a look in her eyes that was wildly familiar— and he lunged to catch her right before she pitched forward.)

"So, run it by me again, if you don't mind," Tony runs a hand over his face.

"Peter snuck out of gym," Michelle repeats blankly, the tone of someone who has indeed been forced to rehash the same story again and again. "I followed him. Last time he did that, it was because he was hiding sepsis and nearly died in the bathrooms."

"Jesus." Tony sighs. "And when did you know he was Spider-Man? Does he know that you know?"

"He knows, he told me," Michelle says casually. Then adds, "after I figured it out, though. It was easy."

"Right. Well, funny. He didn't think to mention that to me. Almost like he forgot that it was a relevant detail for me to know about his extracurricular activities or something." Tony sits back in the vinyl chair and crosses his arms.

"Weird. Sounds like a personal problem."

They stare at each other. Silence meets both of them.

Tony hums in consideration as he studies the odd kid in his med bay. One of Peter's closest friends, the one he's sweetest on. She's got spark. Tony likes her.

His eyes flick up to the IV she's been set on. "Pain meds working?"

"Good enough," she acquiesces. She's blinking slow, but her words are clear. "I can't feel the staples in my head, so, I can't complain."

"Guess not."

"Peter's going to think this is his fault," Michelle says suddenly, her mouth twisting in an uncomfortable expression. "Isn't he?"

"Probably." Tony drums his fingers across his thigh. A thought crosses his mind, and he lets it start to turn. "What do you think?"

Michelle spots a game for what it is immediately. She narrows her eyes in suspicion. "What do I think about what?"

"Do you think it's Peter's fault?"

"Well, he's not the one who dropped a building on me, is he?" Michelle says dryly. "I'm the one who tailed him, and I knew I didn't have spider powers when I did it. I knew the risks."

"That's very mature," Tony comments. "Why'd you follow him, if you knew the risks?"

Michelle looks at him like he's the epitome of something deeply unimpressive. Her mask was slipping by the second— the drugs were definitely kicking in about now. Tony gives her a practiced, serene smile.

"You don't need some crazy suit, or money, or superpowers to worry about Peter Parker," she says sagely, as if she's reciting words from an ancient text. "He's very worry-able. It's worth the risks."

"We can sure agree on that."

"Mhm," Michelle squints at him. "You know, I didn't like you at first."

Tony studies her for a moment. He doesn't feel offended, because— it's hard to be offended. He's not exactly his biggest fan, either, and there's a long, long list for potential reasons as to why.

"Join the club," he says instead, remaining neutral. "Any particular gripe, kid? Or maybe you just don't like my face."

"Other than the war profiteering?" Michelle says, and yikes, that's a kick to the gut. "Maybe it's your contributions to the patriarchy and consumerism. Maybe it's your very tight and generational connections to a government that's notoriously corrupt. Or it could be the needless destruction of service buildings because you and your team can't just talk to each other like adults."

Tony is quiet for a long moment. He feels vaguely as though he's just been ran over by a train ten consecutive times, only to be trussed up like a pig after and shot out back. He feels mildly sick. He feels itchy.

He clears his throat. "...I suppose that would do it, yeah."

Michelle makes a soft, agreeing noise, looking distracted momentarily by her own hands. She's scraping dried blood out from under her fingernails.

"What changed?" Tony ask.

"Mgh," Michelle deflates, holding the exhaustion of someone far older than her. It's almost comedic, the sigh she lets out. "Peter did, I guess."

She looks up and continues:

"He trusts you," she explains slowly. "And usually that doesn't mean shit to me. He trusts too much, in my opinion. He's... soft. But I've seen how you take care of him, and... no matter how much it was hard for me to believe, you do actually... care about him. You keep him... safe."

"...I appreciate that," Tony says carefully, his heart thrumming fast under his ribs. "And I'm— all the other stuff you mentioned, I don't forget any of it. I'll be fixing those mistakes til I'm five feet under, I swear it."

"I know," Michelle says cryptically. "I pay very close attention to everything you do. If you ever hurt Peter, I'd recommend you to do the same."

Tony pauses. "Looks back at the IV bag, which is getting low, now that he thinks about it. "Those pain meds starting to hit you pretty hard all the sudden, huh?"

"Little bit," Michelle sinks back into a cot, looking younger as she buries under the cotton sheets. "You called my parents, right?"

"Yeah. Takes a while to drive upstate, but they're on the way," Tony says. He smiles. "Peter is too. He'll probably show up first."

"And why are you here?" She implores suspiciously. "Don't you have Avengers things to do?"

"Yep," Tony says, and doesn't offer anything more to his answer. Michelle narrows her eyes at him, and doesn't offer further questioning. It was funny, the way they worked together; the way she was so different from Peter.

A few minutes later, and the meds have really kicked in.

"The Bastille was originally built in Paris to protect it from invaders," she spoke at a rapid pace. "But leading up to the French Revolution, it was used more as a prison— at the end of the revolution, The Bastille was torn down by hand as a public display of denouncing the Revolution for its toll on the city. Brick by brick, they—"

Michelle is so loopy that Tony has to make a valiant effort to contain his chuckles— and he has to wonder if this is who Peter knows, how often this side of her is seen.

In a weird coincidence, the moment this particular thought crosses his mind, is when the door bursts open.

Peter rushes in, suit still donned, mask crumpled in his hands and haphazardly tossed to the floor. He's got scorch marks singed randomly on the suit, soot on his face, and looks to be in physical pain. Alarm bells immediately go off in Tony's head.

"Em," Peter breathes, stuttering to the side of the bed. He takes her face into his hands so gently, looking all over for her injuries, inspecting the bandaging around her head with utmost scrutiny and guilt.

"Oh," he crumbles, his hands hovering just over the bandage, like he wants so badly to soothe it with his touch but knows better than to try. It's a feeling Tony is all too familiar with. "Shit, Em, I'm so sorry. Are you okay?"

Michelle hums, her face pitching into his hands. Her pupils are blown out like crazy. "They put me on so many drugs. Jesse, we need to cook."

Peterlaughs shakily and tucks some of her hair behind her ear. He's blinking rapidly, tears coming unbidden to his eyes. "Right, yeah. They got you on some good stuff, huh?"

His head pulls up to scan the IV drip, finding the label effortlessly, reading it with a firm set of his jaw, and dropping his head back down. His eyes soften again. His thumb strokes against her cheek. "I'm so sorry, MJ, you shouldn't have gotten hurt. That's all my fault."

Michelle grumbles a bit, incoherent. She seeks for Tony, her head moving lazily she moves. She points an accusing finger at him. "I told you."

Tony feels kind of shellshocked, so he throws his hands up in surrender. Peter relaxes slightly, but only slightly, and pulls away from Michelle just enough to look at Tony properly.

"Thank you," he says fervently, and Tony notes that the pain in his face has faded. One of his hands has dropped and is now linked to Michelle's— although he's not sure that either of them are aware of this particular fact. "Thank you for sitting with her until I got here."

"Of course," Tony says with a shrug. "What can I say? I like the kid."

Peter's shoulders drop, and his smile say something like relief, his eyes say something like, me too. 

Michelle tugs at his hand, and goes, "Peter, did you know the Storming of Bastille is celebrated as a national holiday in France?"

Peter drags a chair over, squeezing her hand lightly, and gives her a smile. "Not yet. Tell me about it, that sounds interesting."

That boy was the very definition of smitten.

Tony left the room.

[jaggedwolf]

pll rewatch 1x20-1x21

plot ramps up as we approach the finale. Caleb boards a literal bus, Paige gets on a metaphorical one, a new lesbian appears to go oh hell yes to Emily's face and as always: Spencer has a bad time

Spencer sounds most like a teenager when she whines "make them stop" to her mom about the cops searching her room. she is a sixteen year old, easy as it is to forget.

Hanna/Caleb are so domestic already - we will meet more queer women as the show progresses, but Haleb will beat all of them in the art of u-hauling by virtue of moving in together before getting together and oh god I just remembered another future Caleb line

Hanna has told the liars that she had sex with Caleb and Emily's first question is "have you had another opportunity" ok Emily

The girls all :eyes_emoji: at Paige and Sean having lunch together and Hanna reassures Emily, saying "it's okay, Sean's a good guy"

do the liars now think of Paige as Emily's friend or at least a neutral? Hanna's response here is quite different from when she called Paige a knob a few episodes back

Aria being the one to go "woah when did that start happening" cracks me up Aria you pay the least attention to your schoolmates out of everyone why would you expect to notice anything

She then accidentally sends an Ezra text to her mom instead. This bewilders me because (1) even phones of ye olde 2010 showed SMS threads by recency and I assume Ezra is at the top of Aria's list (2) does she have her mom saved as "Ella" instead of "Mom"?? (3) in a contacts list, Emily would appear between Ella and Ezra.

Ella is very understanding. and believes in giving Aria her privacy. She will not at all be rewarded for trusting her daughter. Poor Ella.

So, why does Sean think Emily would know whether Paige is dating anyone anyway? Gives Emily the opportunity to say "we swim on the same team" and that's all that really matters.

Sean describes Paige as "fun" a descriptor no one has ever used for S1!Paige. I kid, kid, she does seem more at ease and is probably less palpably full of turmoil outside of the contexts of Emily and/or swimming.

Emily's reaction to being handed a bag of full of Ezria totems is my reaction, this episode is Emily dealing with real or forced heterosexuality

Emily interrupts Paige putting up...swimming posters? Are the Sharks still recruiting team members? Anyway, here we get Paige saying "he makes me laugh" about Sean and unfortunately for our Ken Doll I think that comment is merely a trite recitation of what you are supposed to say about the boy you like

Paige tries to walk away from the conversation and Emily still follows her, like Emily, you have no reason to poke your nose into this. (Other than petty petty jealousy, but Emily would not admit such a thing when she can subsume it into generic concern.)

So what's up with Caleb not replying to any texts right when the liars tell Hanna he's sus and they all see the owl necklace/USB on Jenna? Does he know he's been caught out, is he trying to figure out a way to come clean, is he planning his bus trip out of here?

Regardless it gives Hanna time for her anger to build, and for her to figure out that 214 is Caleb's locker combination (Pick a better one, dude). This means Toby heard Caleb and Jenna mention Spencer's name. What's up with that.

I'd forgot Spencer's story about running away as a seven year old, and no one noticing. Sad little Hastings. The writers foil me by there being literally no Disney princess films released between 1999 and 2002, what re-release did she watch, and more importantly, what was each liar's favorite Disney princess as a kid?

Spoby right now are really bonding over being pariahs...Toby repeated the line about people crossing the street when they see him....my poor guy...

Hanna's slapping of Jenna felts way more violent than I remembered, those glasses flew!

At some point in this ring Aria is wearing a gigantic black ring with a pointy bit and all I could think about was how easy it would be to take someone's eye out with that

Aw, Paily's first scene in Emily's room, featuring the window seat of course.

And of course, the introduction to PLL's soundtrack of a theme literally called Guys Like Paige. Not the last time we'll hear it :D :D

Veronica is really good with Spencer this episode, helping her understand the legal circumstances, getting the police to back off, keeping Spencer in the loop...but she is still a C+ parent for not kicking Ian off her property imo

1x21 is all about the founder's festival where the people running booths range from the Ackard's church (what denomination are they, anyway), Hanna and Mona (don't even know what they're selling), and students from Sheridan Prep

+ Garrett lurking ominously in the shadows

Love the scene where Caleb tries to talk to Aria about Hanna and Ella mouths "HE'S CUTE" about Caleb to Aria. Caleb has now talked one-on-one with every liar and is the first love interest to do so. Ella is should interact with the teens instead of just her family, Byron or Ezra, it is actually pretty fun seeing her in that context

Paige is cute in this next scene, before it all goes badly. She grabs Emily by the arm because she's so excited, and she is so very smug that she got tickets to a sold-out concert and is treating Emily to them

We will never see Nick McCullers on-screen again but I'm trying to construct a picture of the type of stress-inducing parent he is and I don't think it's a micromanaging one or one who knows what Paige is up to every minute - she doesn't seem time-constrained at the karaoke or picnic dates, and he gets her these concert tickets via his connection.

Oh foolish foolish Paige. What you do is, you tell your dad you are going with your friend Pru, you go to the concert with Emily, you tell your dad that you are meeting Pru there and after, oh Pru's parents already picked her up. For bonus points, you ask Pru to cover for you without coming out to her, because the whole school already knows your dad is a homophobic douchenozzle about Emily and so it's not that weird.

Paige is too fucked up about herself to even contemplate logistics like that though, so of course she goes with bringing a guy. Though I assume Nick doesn't know the third ticket is for Emily anyway or else he'd be miffed so what's the point of insurance boy anyway.

"What even was your plan here, Paige" <- a question I will have many times

Paige I know you've been looking up how to come out to your dad but I wish you had also stumbled across how to excel at being closeted while still going on gay dates and not piss off your girlfriend lmao.

When explaining why she can't go over to Sheridan Prep's support group Paige mentions it is two (2) miles away and Emily nods understandably and I am left going wait does Paige not have a car. Did she pedal furiously on her little bike to the karaoke place. Did she fill panniers with picnic supplies for that date.

Tell me more about Paige McCullers' traveling logistics, show.

Keeping things subtle, Aria knocks Ezra's coffee onto his pants in the middle of a hallway at school and goes WOW I CAN'T BELIEVE I DID THAT I AM SUCH A KLUTZ and. I hate this. I hate them. Just text like normal people. You are doing a worse job of hiding this than Paige is of her sexuality.

Aria then proceeds to be distressed because guys, she looked at his WEBSITE PAGE (...are they not allowed to say facebook anymore? because Aria said facebook in the second or third episode) and saw you know what? A woman! With a ring! In a photo with him! Egads!

All of the liars project on to Aria's concerns - Emily says to be honest and clear the air, Hanna says fuck it find out for yourself by befriending the girl in the photo, Spencer says sometimes people look guilty but they aren't guilty okay :(

S1 Spencer is more suffused with guilt than I expected....real guilt, false guilt, imputed guilt, all of it

Toby and Spencer negotiate no one wanting them to spend time together and being trailed by the cops, and instead of arranging to meet somewhere normal like a restaurant or a movie theatre or even in Spencer's car in a random alley, they arrange a rendezvous at the festival's creepy clown maze

Paige stands up Emily and Samara, once more causing her own problems, as Emily is intrigued by Samara and her handmade jewelry, Paige feels exposed and explodes, and it all goes to shit. Not the right time yet, kiddos.

You'd expect a scorched earth response from Ashley towards Caleb for hurting Hanna, especially considering how heartbroken Hanna sounded in the bathroom, but Ashley isn't mean to him at all, saying he reminders her of herself. Young Ashley probably hurt a person or two while looking out for numero uno.

Spencer gets fucked up in that festival maze, man, and that's before some traps her in some kind of enclosed turnstile and freaks her the fuck out. If she didn't have claustrophobia before, she definitely does now.

Spencer is so dramatic in choosing to kiss Toby in front of her family and Mrs Ackard, but well, Spencer's always had a romantic streak. She loved doing that.

Emily gets her first A text that refers to Paige - thoughtful of A to wait till it's over - leading to an Ali flashback. The day she disappeared, Ali gave Emily a snowglobe.

In that snowglobe is a key. The key opens a storage unit. In that storage unit is a Tweety Bird lunch box. In that lunch box is a USB stick. On that USB stick are videos of the girls in Ali's room.

Worst russian doll surprise ever.

[g0nta-g0kuhara]

OKAY OKAY, I've been reading your Ch4 text posts, and I was gonna just comment, but it got so long, and I was ITCHING to interact so-

Honestly, I think the big reason Ch4 is underappreciated is because of just how divisive Ch4 is as a WHOLE.

Ch5 and Ch6 in a lot of ways are a lot more straight forward!! Especially in characterization. It could (and frequently is) argued what Kaito and Kokichi's motivations are in Ch5, and how they are meant to be interpreted- but it's super open-ended and people can really easily view it the way THEY want to. Kaito and Kokichi can so easily fall into what the viewer WANTS them to be.

Ch4, on the other hand, fundamentally challenges how the characters view each other and, more importantly, how the AUDIENCE sees the characters. For example if you have hated Kokichi since the start, its easy to write him off in ch5 and say he deserved it, but in ch4 you have to confront the fact that Miu was planning to take him out, and that he was SCARED. I've seen people argue the fact that Kokichi SHOULDN'T have been scared as a way to justify how they feel about him and Ch4.

And of course the major Ch4 elephant in the room: A lot of people have to grapple with (or chose to ignore) the real tragedy Gonta faced, because it would mean fully embracing how complicated he is as a character. A lot of people wanted a straightforward: perfect wholesome character was manipulated by an evil villain to kill and faced the consequences, but that's just not what happened. Gonta is a genuinely kind soul and was placed between a rock and a hard place, and whether or not Kokichi had TOLD him... would have been deeply affected by losing another friend, one he thought HE was close with. He lost his memory, not because he was stupid, but because he didn't have the same DOMINANT HAND as everyone else and got his wires mixed up. There's so much to be said about Gonta in chapter 4 but all of it involves a mental confrontation with the fact that he's a human being with free will, who can make both informed decisions and mistakes.

I keep using the word "confront," because that really is what chapter 4 is. Confrontational. Kaito embodies someone who can't handle that confrontation, Shuichi has to cope with the truth and confronting others WITH that truth (including a perpetrator that forgot what he did-), Kokichi has to confront the horrors of the outside world alongside the fact that someone he trusted and worked alongside is planning to kill him, he has to confront the fact that Gonta lost his memory and the fact everyone thinks that Kokichi is just trying to frame his friend, and Gonta has to confront so much of that alongside Kokichi as well as what he, himself did. Something he IS willing to take responsibility for because he recognizes his OWN agency.

(Repeating my thesis like this is a report -) Chapter 4 is incredibly hard to swallow and harder to digest, and because of that gets overshadowed by the following chapters that have a lot more ambiguity and room to pack in as much interpretation as the audience can imagine. There's no fun in wondering how Miu's last moments played out, unlike wondering what REALLY happened in the hangar. Interpretations can be played around with a LOT when it comes to pregame characters, but it's a lot less fun to place blame in a situation full of people who were only trying to defend themselves. To fully appreciate Chapter 4 you have to be open minded to the fact that characters can do "bad" things and it doesn't make them bad people, and that situations can be deeply and blatantly unfair to those you love and those you hate alike.

It's a really complicated chapter, I see you in being obsessed with it, thank you for coming to my Ted talk lol.

(I didnt even know you could send asks this long holy hell!!)

I can see that ch5 and ch6 have a long more areas of wiggle room and ambiguity to play around in. It's no surprise hangar fics are so common. I guess that makes a good deal of sense- the interest in ch4 is less in "What happened that we didnt see" and more the implications of what concretely happened on the characters and their motivations/inner thoughts for doing what they did.

An image I have in my head extremely vividly of trial 4 is Kaito, Shuichi, and Kokichi arguing with eachother (metaphorically with truth bullets- Ideals vs Truth vs Lies (Ive been struggling to think of an art composition along this theme since I finished the damn chapter a year ago ghdsjkf)) with Gonta in the centre in the crossfire. It is a BRUTAL chapter for all of these characters. But within that there is so much to dig into. What was going through Kaito's head as it became increasingly clear Gonta could not be innocent? How did Shuichi deal with his number one support lashing out and rejecting him like he did? What the genuine fuck was going through Kokichi's head?

I'm going to be fully honest here (so I apologize if this is a bit blunt or anything I am trying my best), but I REALLY struggle to grapple with Kokichi's role in ch4 wrt gonta in any type of sympathetic light. With Miu and Kokichi I see the complexity in its entirety. It's heartbreaking to think that those two were friends and Miu chose to target him in her desperation, and Kokichi had to deal with the fact that she was trying to kill him AND with whatever he saw from the truth of the outside world. But when it comes to Gonta.. I almost feel like I can't talk about it objectively. Even just thinking about the trial from that perspective makes my stomach turn in knots. But there is an amount of fun in that yknow?? I cannot tell you how many hours I've spent trying to unravel all that, especially before I played ch5 5 months after I finished trial 4.

The fun and the interest in trial 4 is that its so complex. There's no one complete villain and there's no one true hero, despite what a superficial look at the chapter might tell you (especially pre ch5). Putting these characters in situations where they're so outside of what their standard role in v3 had been so far is so entertaining to me.

Miu asking Kokichi not to struggle as she betrays him (what caused her desperation to get to this point?). Kokichi pushing past being just mischievous and perhaps insensitive to being downright cruel (and what caused the change in his behaviour). Kaito's righteous anger and rejection of Shuichi, his desperation to defend Gonta. (fun fact- they used a sprite for Kaito here that is only used twice in the game AFAIR, once when Gonta is proved without a shadow of a doubt to be guilty, again when he saw the truth of the outside world. It's one of my favourite Kaito sprites). Shuichi having to push through the trial with his only support being Kokichi (which he does not necessarily want) and Kiibo with everyone else against him. The subversion of what Gonta had been saying about himself, and what his classmates had been implying about him the entire time, that he is not stupid, and they've all been brushing him aside because of their own preconceptions, hurting him in the process. It drives me insane. It's so good.

You're so so right, and thank you for this ask. This is the kind of analysis of ch4 that I ADORE.

[kreeperslash]

Journal/Memories Pt. 1

i don't really know how this works on here I don't know whether I should make this public or keep it private. So I'll just keep it as whatever settings it on. (bear in mind I like to ramble a lot and my words or whatever won't make any sense at times other than to me). These post will be a double story (a real story of my life between two people named E (me) and C (you'll get a explanation of this person)

My name is E. Male, demi-sexual/romantic, will be 30 this year (Capricorn), born in Mexico but raised in the U S. (I came illegally at barely a year old it's hard to say I don't recall I just repeat what my family has told me) And was under the DACA program, animal lover,degree in business, alien enthusiast, tarot card reader, anime/manga nerd, I collect figures, I am a big gamer, I want to get better at the things I love and want to learn more like DIY/baking/gardening.

The other person in my post I'll bring up a lot is C the one and only person I truly have ever love and will only love (my soul mate and the person I always choose in each life time of they actually happen). Born and raised in Australia, silly, clumsy (I'm way more clumsier than them), tarot believer, gamer (sims, lol, other life sims, story games), collecting stuffies, cat lover, unicorn.

I fell in love with a person which I'll leave as C. We met through a online social game named Smallworlds. Funny is that we met through an accident on my end since I ended up in the wrong room. While clicking around to the actual room I needed to be in C approached me without me realizing that they were. Then a simple question was asked "Are you a lesbian?" My avatar is clearly male and usually I would ignore things like this and move on, but C something about them was different I can't explain it besides the fact that they are special in a way. I gave a response and we slowly talked more and more and I forgot my original plan of going to meet up someone else in a different room. Realize this game was a flash 2010s social game stuff that doesn't really exist anymore now a days. It was at the end of 2016 or 2017 that we met btw. Room was a Burger King and we started to mess with people saying the meat was people and convincing people that we are going to murder them and make them into burgers for laughs and jokes.

I don't know how long we spend playing around but you know how all things end you usually leave and never meet the person again or just casually add each other and forget. No not C they wanted to not only add me in game but add me on Kik if I had it, again I would really never add people outside of games unless I knew them well but C was special and I did.

I'll continue my story of me and C in another post for now but I'll let you know what's actually going on now. I moved to Australia to marry them fucked it all up because I have severe mental health issues that thought I get through and solve here but no my anxiety and depression has gripped me too hard and I've push C to their limits that we need to be apart for a while so that I can grow and improve myself without using them as a crutch. Since I left the US while under DACA I nullified my chances of going back to the US and I knew this and I still chose to be with C. But even if I stayed in the US to try to fix myself it wouldn't have happened my family, my family is so much of a crutch also in a different way like a crutch that actively makes you wanna trip (I hope to explain this in another post for now I'll just keep it simple). So now I'll be going back to my home city in Mexico in one of the top 10 deadliest cities in the whole country. I hope to become better through my own means and not using C as a crutch because that's not a relationship that I want them to see it as I want it to be one where they are holding my hands and making them feel what they should.

I guess that gets stuff out of the way about me and where this will go. I'm hoping that this string (that a good way to put it?) of post about my journey for self improvement and telling the story of me and C as well.

[freedom-barricades-bighero16]

Chronicle of Abuse v2

Hey guys... I need help.

I've been thinking about what kind of a person my sister really is, whether all this is just sibling rivalry or she's actually been abusing me for years. I've talked to many counsellors, support staff and my therapists but they don't seem to have an answer. Maybe you'll know the better terminology to describe her behaviour and I'll let you be the judge.

When we were toddlers

Has hit me before.

Has sent me a threatening note. She even explained what it meant to me: She is allowed to hit me (repeated three times) and she is allowed to scream at me.

She abandons me whenever her friends / my older cousin comes along.

Always made me play the bad guy in our games, or in my drawings.

When we were children

Again with the threats. She threatened to tattle to our mum by using a "special device" to send her notes, and I was petrified because she would scream at me instead of disciplining me properly.

Slammed me against a wall once during a fight. I cried and my parents asked her what did she do, and she said that she did nothing.

When she first went to middle school, her own bullies got worse so she kind of took it out on me (can't really blame her for that)

Started creating some really weird stories. When I expressed that I'm uncomfortable with them, she gets angry and I have to pretend that I liked them.

Jumped out into the road many times just to avoid a dog, and throws a tantrum every time she sees one (which is a lot). You have no idea how much her dog phobia traumatized me

Sometimes says I'm not allowed to do certain things while doing the same things herself.

Told me many times that our parents are spoiling me and that I'm an entitled little brat, and she would get very upset if Mum and Dad finally agreed to get me something but she didn't have the same exact thing. In fact, now when I get something for myself, I'm kind of still dreading her throwing a fit.

After Mum almost divorced Dad over not having a cake for her birthday, my sister threatened that she would throw a tantrum like Mum did if she doesn't have a cake for her birthday. (She told me this when we're alone, I think. I forgot if Dad was present too)

My Dad has told her to not scream at me many times, but she never listened to him.

When we were teens

If I told my parents that I'm disagreeing with what my sister said (I often had to whisper), she would get really close to my face and GROWL.

We went to the same primary school and were both bullied by our classmates. When I cry, my sister tends to just tell me to shut up.

She got into Harry Potter and Game of Thrones for a bit, continuing on the weird stories. She would also read out the books in an accent that sounds more like English (which personally, I found very pretentious). I couldn't leave or she'll yell at me.

She tried to pressure me into dating boys when I came out as bi, and was very dismissive and asked me if I'm making everything related to LGBTQ+ when I came out to her as gay, and tried to adopt a more butch look.

Technically this doesn't count as affecting me, but there was a time where my sister wanted a manga but my Dad said no, so she threw another tantrum until he finally bought it for her.

She literally said "You're not allowed to treat me like this" when I'm unhappy with her. It happened a few times I think.

Demanding me to take a post down on my social media if it had swear words.

She would scream at Smokey like she did with me whenever he bit her (basically, being a typical baby kitten). I told her to not do that, her response was "What else can I do apart from screaming?"

When we are adults / Present day/ Ongoing

The transphobia. She once told me that she has heard of trans people saying that what Rowling said isn't transphobic, but now I'm pretty sure she was lying to me.

Constant, overt anti-Chinese racism. This happened after I told her her rants about dogs in the family chat are making me very uncomfortable.

Just being dismissive to literally anything that has to do with me, even when I'm trying to warn her about a cryptocurrency scam that I almost fell victim to.

So, there you have it. That's as much as I can think of right now.

I've heard from some friends that my sister might be a narcissist, while my parents often told me she has a lack of awareness of things/inertia and that she's very blunt in general. It almost felt like they're letting her get away with the stuff she did.

I've been trying to find support for dealing with a possibly abusive sibling, but I don't seem to find anything. I need your help. Please. I don't know what to do.

[profoundly-mediocre]

Penpals

One of my pen pals recently sent me a writing prompt and so I thought it'd be fun to respond here and make them look at my blog :P Also, we've been handwriting letters, which I find very endearing, but this is a little longer and my hand tends to cramp when it's not on a keyboard.

I met this pen pal at a writing retreat for a memoirist, so it makes sense that it's much more of a personal memoir type prompt. I'm not usually inclined to share experiences unprompted, because many of them are deeply painful, but I do tend to share when I'm asked. We're all human, after all, and there's nothing I've experienced that hasn't been repeated by a lot of other people throughout history.

So here's the prompt:

"Tell me what you forgot to say. To whom?"

What comes to mind is something that I didn't exactly forget to say, but I left it unsaid. More like I purposefully didn't say it.

I had a fling with a very attractive and younger woman once. We were very compatible in just about every way, not just physically. A few months in and things were great. We had started giving voice to the ideas of a longer term committed relationship. I adored her and still do.

Then, she broke up with me suddenly one day. I'll leave her unnamed and try not to overshare her details, but she was having a lot of crises back to back. She had been raped and then had her livelihood thrown into question by the landlord of her business. Suddenly, her world felt unsafe and uncertain.

She communicated with me very well, one thing I really appreciated about her, that she didn't feel safe or have bandwidth to maintain a relationship at the time. She told me she was sorry, but needed to breakup with so that she could focus on the crisis at hand. It really hurt and I think it hurt her as well.

My response was very understanding, though. It was actually a fairly new relationship and we still saw each other through rose colored lenses, but I had started forming feelings for her. I told her I understand and I'm sorry these challenges, especially the rape, had thrown her into crisis mode. I agreed that her life did seem to be full of challenges and that a relationship could also be challenging given the circumstances at the moment. I left everything else unsaid. I didn't want to make it more difficult for her emotionally and I didn't want to come off as pathetic or something. Everyone processed things differently and she told me she needed space to process, so I accepted it because I cared about her.

I let her walk away and didn't try to cling to the idea of something more. It was really hard to watch her in pain and my experience was one of unfulfilled desire to be present and available for her.

Here's what I really thought.

----------------------------------------------------------

G,

I know the relationship is young and it's still in the flirty crush stage, but breaking up with me really fucking hurts and feels unnecessary. Whether it is too soon or not, I have started caring deeply about you. It feels like you're dismissing me when I am capable, willing, and asking to be part of the solution to your current situation. Why throw it away when it could make us stronger? We were just talking about our relationship in serious terms and now this?

I've never been assaulted or raped, so I can't really imagine what you're going through, but I can be supportive and keep my pants on while we work through this. I want to be supportive of you at this time.

Also, I know a thing or two about finances and running a business and can help solution and even implement a pivot for your business.

Why not use me as a supportive friend instead of walking away?

----------------------------------------------------------

So I left that unsaid and you might see why. What a cluster fuck of an experience on both sides. I can't imagine what she was going through and I'm left wishing she'd help me understand.

Time does still heal, but this particular breakup did leave a mark. I've never had a breakup when the relationship was so good. I've never had a breakup because of someone outside of the relationship intruding, either.

In a way, it still feels unresolved to me. Like something was taken from me unfairly. Not in a possessive way, but like a missed opportunity from misjudgment on someone else's part. Excuse the crudeness, but it was emotional blue balls.

Perhaps it wasn't as good as I thought, though. How do you put someone aside that you care about? Was this just an opportune excuse to run away? Perhaps it would have been worse to continue, get to the likely 'I love you' part of the relationship, and then break it off. Was leaving this unsaid cowardly or involve me in the responsibility of a prematurely ended relationship?

Overthinking is something I do really well.

[harrison-abbott]

My father occasionally asks me to sit his flat when he goes on a trip. And he did so earlier this month. Nice part of town. So, he has a flat on the other side of the city and when he goes on a holiday somewhere he’ll ask me to come over and be there, because he’s a bit worried that the flat might be burgled and so on (which has happened before). Anyway. I was there recently, and on one of the evenings, I heard a knocking on the door. And when I opened it, there was this girl in her teens. Who I’d never seen before. She was holding a small dog in her arms, like a baby. When she opened the door she was expecting my father to open; who she knew vaguely. I.e., she knew him as a neighbour. But when she was me it was unexpected. She began telling me that she’d locked herself out of her flat. Which was upstairs. And she wondered whether my Dad had any keys, here? Spare keys, for her flat? I didn’t know any of this. So I called my father up – who was down in Wales. He responded. But he did not have any keys for her flat. He did, however, know the girl’s name. Rowan. And he said that I should invite her in for the time being. The story was that Rowan’s parents had gone out for a meal, and Rowan was in the flat. Then her dog was barking so she went to take him a walk. But forgot her keys and phone inside the flat, and the door had an instant lock thing on it and so she couldn’t get back in. So I invited Rowan in to the flat. And offered a cup of tea and so on. And, on my phone, I asked if she wanted to call her parents to see if they could come home and let her in? She didn’t know their numbers off by heart. So I suggested she contact them via social media. She couldn’t log into her accounts. Didn’t know her passwords or whatever. So then I called up my Dad again, and asked if he knew the contact info for her parents. He sent me a photo of the number and email of Rowan’s mother. So I typed in the number in my phone and then gave it to Rowan whilst it was calling. And we waited as the phone rang and rang … and then a man picked up. Not a woman who was Rowan’s mother. And Rowan said, “Who’s this?” because she didn’t recognise the voice. And the man said, “Who is this? You called me?” And Rowan dropped my phone on the table. So I mouthed to her, “Wrong number. Sorry.” And she repeated the sentence.

Clearly, my father had copied in the wrong number to his phone. So we sent an email to the mother instead. But the mother didn’t respond to the email. And then I was here in this flat with this very young girl who I barely knew, wondering what the Hell to do. And her dog, as well. At least the dog was chilled out. If he had been barking it would’ve made it worse. I offered Rowan some food. All I had was bread and humous and tomatoes and cucumber. Rowan was from America. Chicago. But she sounded Scottish. So I asked her why she sounded Scottish. And she said that she put on the accent because she got bullied at school for having her American accent. Which was a shame. And we were sitting in the kitchen and there was nothing really to do. So we spoke. I asked her what Chicago was like? She said she was from the suburbs. And that she wouldn’t go into the city because of the crime. Rowan was fun. Just in the way that she asked funny questions. Quirky queries – she would ask these weird questions without me expecting. I liked her. She was clumsy as Hell. Just in the way she made her sandwich and the way she communicated. And she told me she had actually locked herself out of the flat twice in a row. But, it didn’t matter. And after a while, her dog barked at the door. Rowan went to answer it. And then I heard the voice of a man, with a heavy American accent, saying, “Hey, what’s going on?” And obviously I had never met him before either. So I went and explained to him that I was my father’s son (his neighbour’s son) and explained the rest of the weird story. He was fine with it. With the whole thing – he said thank you. At this point – when I met her father – I still hadn’t received an email back from earlier. So I didn’t know whether they understood the story either. But the man was cool. Rowan walked upstairs with her dog without saying bye to me. But, I got that she was very young. It was such a bizarre two hours to spend with a stranger. And then for them to leave like that. I just kind of shut the door after the father left as well. Then I was on my own. And half an hour later I got an email from Rowan’s mother thanking me for sheltering her whilst she was locked out of the flat. And I responded, saying, no problem, I was glad to help out.

[annegris]

Okay, ranting time

My newly ex doctor today:

- Exercise should be rational and moderate, for example, don't start with lifting a barbell with weight disks, just lift it alone!

- Uh, a barbell weighs 10 kilos, so no thank you...

- Well, you're wrong about that.

Dude. My first physiotherapist explicitly told me I shouldn't lift more than 5 kilos, and no more than 3 would be even better. That was a dozen years ago btw.

Also, at some point he asked whether I had questions, and, well, I did, but I began to cry instead because I was feeling I was not getting through to him (this kind of thing brings me to tears much too easily for my liking, but whatever). So I wiped my face and told him exactly that.

- You say that physical activity is the main trigger for me.

- That's right, exactly. You washed the window and had a flare after that.

- But during two months, I washed one window and had three flares!

- Yeah, so?

- So maybe physical activity is not the main trigger?!!

I admit, I raised my voice a bit.

- Physical activity is any physical activity! Have I once said it was strenuous physical activity! A person makes two steps and gets a flare! While someone with arthritis feels pain after sitting for some time, and walking helps!

I didn't care for his tone of voice. Like, at all. Later, I listened to the recording I'd made (which had been meant to help me in case I forgot something; and yes, it's legal where I live) and it didn't sound that bad to me, so I may have imagined that.

Still, I don't think I'm going back. I have my doubts about the barbell thing, and I don't feel like I'm actually being heard. And whether the latter is real or imagined, I have no desire to knowingly repeat the experience.

I don't like that I doubt every doctor by now, but I can't exactly not doubt them. I spend two years popping sulfasalazine, and it takes away my energy and gives me migraines instead. Then I quit, and feel better, and now another doctor tells me sulfasalazine was not needed, and I don't have sacroiliitis. Apparently, I'm supposed to lift weights. Idk, really.

[ask-philgraves]

So, I feel like this is going to open up a can of worms, but I invite everyone to listen to what I have to say and not dogpile my ass.

Personally, as of this moment, I would take the DID diagnosis with a grain of salt. Especially if he isn't diagnosed and is telling you this because he found out. Many disorders mimic OSDD & DID that aren't based upon alters and a splitting of identity. That's partly why even if everyone in the world went to a therapist and was diagnosed with DID & OSDD it would still be about 5% - 15% of the total population. It's a tough disorder to manage, which makes it incredibly hard to diagnose and treat.

I know too many people who also say that you can become a system without trauma, which isn't true. Every piece of research we have about that subject shows definitive and conclusive evidence and proof that it takes years' worth of repeated trauma throughout the ages of 2 - 11. Because that's when our brain starts to form a personality, and that's roughly when it can fracture into multiples. Anything after that would cause personality disorders, not Identity disorders.

For everyone I can smell about to type out; "well what are your credentials!" I've been diagnosed with OSDD 1-B a total of six times. Turns out, it wasn't OSDD but actually just a mean combination of the medicine I was taking at the time, PTSD, and BPD. I was in a near-psychotic state for six years, and compulsive lying from my BPD kept them from figuring it out until I was nearly hospitalized.

Mental health is a really weird and not fully clear picture. You're drawing conclusions based upon what you're being told, and fed. Whether it's something you're ingesting through TikTok, YouTube, or something actually present in your brain. There are plenty of people I know who thought they were systems, and it turned out to be a psychotic/manic episode.

There are more than three diagnoses for trauma-based disorders, and I would really like it if people went to doctors instead of looking on the internet for a diagnosis. Yes, self-DX is valid in some cases, but it's not valid in my eyes for things like this because there are so many different things it could be. Something simple like delusions could be something like you forgot your bipolar medicine or a developing tumor within your brain.

Now that being said, I wouldn't call it fake. It seems like I just did, but I assure you, I'm not. If he does have DID, then you definitely need to be there to support him, and maybe see if you can get a therapist for the transition because that's going to be a giant transition for you both. It should also help with his DID if he gets a specialist within that area of medicine.

Point being, either way, if a psychologist or therapist isn't involved, they definitely need to be. That's a huge leap to take and a diagnosis that will change everything.

Now to the people who follow me and are self-DX'd, just note, that this is my opinion based on my lived experience. You may have experienced it differently and that's completely fine. I know some mutuals who say they have it, and don't worry I literally won't think less of you having a self-DX. This is y'all's life, don't let me tell you how to live it. I come from a household where mental health isn't always taken seriously, and that all changed in 2018 after a family member killed themselves because they were experiencing a mental break. Turns out, they were schizophrenic, and now me and my siblings have to be extremely careful and cautious of our mental state changing because 4 more people in our family (directly descended from) has been diagnosed since then.

Again, this is just an outsider looking in, please do with this what you will, but I urge everyone if you feel unwell, to always go to a doctor and get a second opinion.

my boyfriend just told me he has DID (Dissociative Identity Disorder) i love him so much. but it was a shock. i’m not on here to diss people with DID but i genuinely am so lost on how to deal with it. for example when he told me he had DID he told me that there was two of him and he said that the other one’s name was joey but his legal name was james. and ever since he’s told me..when we text he always says who spoke by putting their name like this, “-joey” or “-james.” but i don’t see him as two people so it’s hard for me. and don’t get me wrong, i know it’s definitely hard for him. i think part of the reason behind why he does that is because he said that “joey” doesn’t have any feelings towards me. and that “joey” doesn’t care about me. but “james” does.

and when i look at it like that, it’s sweet. but it’s also kind of hard to hear? i don’t think that he was trying to be mean by saying that i think he was just genuinely trying to help me understand what DID includes. i love him so much i’m just trying to be able to understand it all and what it means.

-vi

(*i’ve changed the names for privacy reasons)