#remember you *must* live | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

vine-black · 1 year ago

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It's been wonderful seeing you back on my dash, and I'm glad to know you're (hopefully) feeling a bit better -hugs- What are you excited about next year? What's giving you hope right now?

Hey you! Thank you for checking in with me. I am feeling a bit better (emotionally and spiritually, physically I currently have the worst flu I've had in like a year but I'll get over that haha). To answer your question though, I think I'm excited for possibility. Like, I'm also terrified of possibility, because everything could go horribly wrong. I'm an anxious person and that's my mind's automatic, rancid mantra. But...I'm hopeful because I'm still here. Life can be really, truly painful. Hard and hurtful and harrowing - but I'm still here. Not only am I still here, but I've learned through this winnowing that lots of other things are also still here. Maybe some of those things have always been there? There are people in my life that care about me in ways I didn't think I deserved. I am capable of doing things I thought I would never be able to do. I'm funny and adaptable and capable and just really embarrassingly human in the exact same ways all the people I love also are which is beautiful to think about sometimes.

I think there's a lot of my life, even well into my adulthood where I felt like a kid in the back seat of their parents car. Along for a ride I had very little say in, keeping myself distracted until...it ends? Who knows. I feel now that I don't really have the luxury of living that way, I've had to be here on purpose a lot more. I've had to ask myself a lot of questions about the kind of person I want to be, and how I want to spend the time I have left. This has made me think a lot about what it means to worship Death and to still, every stupid little day I wake up, I put on my stupid little pants and very politely say to Him: "not yet".

I'm excited to be alive on purpose.

Anyway, I'm really happy you sent this ask! Its nice knowing I'm a pleasant part of someone's day.

#ask #liminalblessings #remember you will die #remember you *must* live #the eternal refrain #you've got me at an extreme disadvantage #I'm on just enough cough syrup to be extremely sappy #jk

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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 19 days ago

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Behold, a Bunny!

(for @alliechickfic on twitter)

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #a-yuan #lan wangij #All the bunnies bouncing around cloud recess must be the most theraputic feeling in the world.#If I were A-yuan I too would throw out all my past bad memories and fill my heart and soul with bunnies.#Well...It's more so to do with how our brains try to protect ourselves from traumatic memories.#And as happy as we tend to remember little A-yuan - His whole early life was almost entirely a stress filled experiance.#From losing his parents to being put in a work camp to living in a struggling community to the [redacted]...he did not catch a break!#It warms my heart knowing he got a happy second chance.#Does anyone else think about how A-Yuan consistently represents positive second chances?#In a story that constantly tells us that trying to be kind will only result in suffering;#Everything about Lan Sizhui says: 'No. You can be kind and there will be positive change in the world. The sacrifices you made mattered.'

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sicklyseraphnsuch · 3 months ago

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Okay. But. Kinger can only have memories when he's in the dark. So *not* actively breathing (which they dont need to do - which they can forget to do) means Kinger lights up like a little lamp

By being a lightsource himself, he can never have darkness.

Which means, Kinger actively (and never forgets) to keep breathing - keep maintaining the illusion of life - because if he allows himself to truly truly forget, he will lose the only way he can keep his memories...

DO YOU UNDERSTAND???? GRIEF IS THE ONLY WAY TO LIVE!!!

#tadc spoilers #the amazing digital circus #kinger #DO YOU SEE #HE HAS TO MAINTAIN THE ILLUSION OF LIFE #HE HAS TO STAY ALIVE OR ELSE NO ONE WILL REMEMBER HIS WIFE #HE IS LITERALLY WHAT IT MEANS TO CARRY GRIEF #BECAUSE IF HE LETS HIMSELF GO #THEN SHE WILL TRULY BE DEAD #HE MUST NOT FORGET HOW TO LIVE SO SHE TOO CAN LIVE

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secondbeatsongs · 25 days ago

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going through some old logs, and I need you to understand just how truly unhinged early 2010s RP omegle was.

genuinely you could stay on there for hours with just one person, hashing out complex traumatic backstories, drawn-out love confessions, detailed action scenes...collaboratively describing graphic violence, past abuse, comfort, hurt/comfort, hurt/no comfort, any number of sex acts...and then one of you would be like, "oh haha it's 2AM! I have to sleep :(" and the other person would say, "omg saaaame. :( gnight!!!" and then you'd exit the chat and never speak to each other again, and this was. fine.

you could just spend an entire evening shoving your wretched, bleeding soul into a chat log with someone you'd never meet or learn the name of, achieve some form of emotional catharsis, and then go about your day or night like this was an average way to spend your time.

I'm really normal about this, actually

#sbs rambles #omegle #it wasn't always serious ofc. there was a lot of lighthearded silliness #but I usually went in for the darker sadder stuff that built up to a happy ending #there's really a special form of intimacy when you and an internet stranger are each controlling a fictional character #and describing them doing things like bandaging each other's wounds #checking each other for bruises. asking them to talk about what they've been through. great stuff!#I hope there are still places where people do stuff like this. like I know there are forums and servers for this but that's not the same.#and I mean. I keep thinking ''there must be other places like this!'' but then I remember the goodbye message when omegle shut down #and...I dunno. the internet is different now #we don't live in that world anymore #anyway if you ever RP'd sherlock stuff on omegle you might have talked to me. :) we might have written something together #and despite it being superwholock-era fandom “cringe”#I'm proud of that #that was a really important part of my life #it was fun :) though I definitely had issues I wasn't willing to confront yet lmao #and I wish I had saved more of the logs :/#oh! I also liked the moments where you'd have to take a break #like you could be right in the middle of something intense and then the other person would be like #(brb I have to finish making dinner for my husband) and you'd say (sure!)#and then 20mins later you'd start up again where you left off

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naamahdarling · 11 months ago

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#i had to do this none of the ones i have seen have been weird enough for me #honestly the first is the best he just fucking MANIFESTED on the back of the seat next to me #and when i turned around to scan the theater behind us i grabbed at the neighboring seat for leverage #and it was his got damned ankle #we made eye contact for two seconds before a giant spotlight shone on us #i would think it was cool now but I was only 10 and wanted to D I E #i swear to god i felt NOTHING when he landed his rigging or whatever must have been AMAZING #most humiliating moment of my life to that point though #you accidentally grab a childhood celebrity crush's ankle during a live performance and he looks into your eyes #then the whole theater is looking at you #oh my god it was horrendous #i hope he remembers it

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triflesandparsnips · 1 year ago

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hey so friendly reminder

stede gives *full body* kisses

#I love it when actors just go full-body like that #because yes kisses with LOTS OF SPACE in between is a thing that happens!#but they're not the *only* kind #and there is a *very particular message* about a full-body one #especially on screen #and that message is #'somebody said we must live in two separate bodies - but my skin says it misses you -#and my blood remembers when it ran through both our veins -#and every part of me just wants to prove a motherfucker wrong - so let's kiss #and kiss -#until our bodies become one again -#and we can finally take a full deep breath of air #instead of the lonely half-measures that sustained us #for all the years it took to find our other halves again #(...which tbh is kind of a lot for one man's hip-to-hip full-dick action kiss to accomplish but like. I calls it like I sees it)#our flag means death #our flag means death s2 spoilers

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cybertron-after-dark · 2 months ago

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Being constantly surrounded by the presence of a loving God sounds great until you realize you never know when his freaky fuckin eyes are gonna show up to check on you.

And man. They do it a LOT.

#primus please let the mech breathe #what i want to emphasize most with this iteration of optimus is the inherent fucking terror of being made a prime #really pick at those little threads of how fucked the matrix as a concept is. same with the staple tropes of op himself #the idea in tfp that it can entirely change your personality. and that if you lose it you cannot remember your time with it #those implications send me spiraling. to what degree is optimus the same being as orion pax? do you forfeit your soul to be a demigod?#do you fucking die to become a conduit for the higher being that made you? letting it puppet your mind and body like a parasitoid?#if death in transformers is simply rejoining the allspark; if the soul is something splintered off from the whole;#and if to die as a cybertronian is for that fragment to merge with the whole once again. is a prime not fundamentally a dead mech walking?#a prime stands with one pede in the afterlife and one in the land of the living and has to keep up with both at once #constantly seeing visions from a plane his processor was never meant to comprehend with optics that were never built to see it #forced to adapt into an elevated being as much as a frame that still has silly things like wants and needs and emotions and base coding can #how does a mortal live when his body is no longer just his body; but a vessel fir something holy and a tool fashioned to heal the world?#when he can never truly be alone again and he has to simply live with the ever present knowledge that he is being watched #both by his god and by the world #how does one live knowing not even their thoughts are private? when your god may be living but man he does not get the idea of boundaries #guess it must be hard to grasp personal space and all that when youre an ocean of souls that left it behind #maccadam #transformers #wayward sparks #optimus prime #art tag #sometimes i feel kinda bad for putting this bastard through The Horrors. if ws gets made all the way he will be thrown so many bones #only sometimes tho >:3

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lemonhemlock · 5 months ago

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Young Rhaenyra to Alicent: “Should you be traveling in such conditions?”

And yet, older Alicent to Rhaenyra: “[The Queen has requested that the child be brought to her, immediately.] Rhaenyra! You should be resting after your labors.”

I honestly WISH Rhaenyra was as horrible as y’all make her out to be. Alicent was the sole reason for the pain and destruction of her.

“There are times when I have been unkind but never untrue.” ✨✨✨✨✨🧐

Wouldn’t be surprised if most who are team green are team Israel too.

how the hell do you get from your first point to the second, especially when rhaenyra stans can often be found espousing blood supremacy talking points. look to your own garden first.

also, if this your clumsy way of asking whether i'm "team" israel, i'm not 🙄 and to bring up actual real-life genocide as a means to get brownie points in fandom wars is beyond the pale

#ask #anon #anti rhaenyra targaryen #anti targ stans #oh no this person doesn't like my fictional barbie it must mean they are cheering on the extermination of ethnic groups 🙄 as a treat 🙄#how do you live with such flawless logic? can you remember how to cross the street?#anti hotd fandom

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ganondoodle · 1 year ago

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even if i didnt love botw as much as i do, totk drives me nuts bc, similarly to pokemon, this series is so SO SO full of potential, they have so many games they can pull from, theres so many themes, characters and worldbuilding thats just left to rot, you dont need to connect anything with a chain to old titles, you dont need to bring back any things that already had their ending, but PLEASE harness at least a fraction of all this!!!! and they just refuse to do it beyond shallow references

totk jsut drives it all home to me, bc this isnt just the next game in the franchise, but a DIRECT SEQUEL no 10 years apart from botw, yet they cant even, they REFUSE to even keep the continuity with its OWN lore it established in botw together, and that, i think, is what truly makes me so insane (derogatory) about totk

it PROVES they do not care, they dont care to build on anything of the lore of old titles beyond references in form of amiibos or whatever, they dont even care to make a sequel to their most successful game in the franchise coherent with its own lore

botw established a captivating detailed world full of potential, while lacking in active storytelling, it had environmental storytelling, characters and ideas that were the perfect ground to build on-

and then they do away with it bc idk .. they want you to build mechs and make videos of it that go viral and thats all they care about or something

shiekah tech? forget that existed character being the character you know? act as if you are seeing them for the first time just like they are lame story? dont think about that just be distracted by the epic presentation of it lore the previous title established? forget that, all that matters is what is here and now beloved character from old games beign brought back? hes a new guy and has no background and no lore and just sits waiting for you at the end to have a flashy fight with references from old titles and their lore? just here for nostalgie bait, dont you remember? you LOVE this series, now give me 70 bucks for a glorified DLC that ruins what you loved about the series and makes you realize that nothign matters and nothing is interesting anymore

you are supposed to take it all at face value, to not think about anything, to see a character say something and just go with it, and forget it the second its over, be distracted by good music and pretty visuals, but dont think about, dont think about anything but what is directly said to you like you have no critical thinking skills, forget there was a game before this one, only the one you play matters, empty your skull and dont let yourself feel anything but what the game tells you to feel

if they dont even care to make the sequel to their most successful game actually build on the previous title, dont even care to keep their continuity of two games supposedly directly happening one after the other in tact- maybe they never cared, and all the meaning we thought we saw them build into their games was all accidental and meaningless

and that is absolutely soul crushing for fans like me to discover

its a game. its not a story, its not a world, its not themes, its not characters, its not lore. its a product made to make you pay money, not to make you think about anything.

#ganondoodles talks #zelda #ganondoodles rants #i know it sounds silly to say this game makes me mad bc its so clearly a game #but do you get what i mean??#and the worst part is #they dont even keep the lore said in the SAME GAME in line #the people in hateno where links HOUSE used to be that is now ZELDAS not remembering him #the children acting like they dont know him #where has link been?#did zelda put him into the forest and just let him live with the boars?#even so the house is here so link must have been here to buy it-#but no forget that #its somethign that happened in botw and that never actually happened or mattered remember?#to have balloons and rocktes and people with WINGS in this world but none of them going up to the sky islands everyone is obsessed about`?#well its for YOU to play around with with meaningless rewards not for the NPCs living in this world #the godly goat guy and the hylian priestress directly saying zelda is their distant descendant to her and then #not show nor say not even hint at them having any offspring and then both die a stupid meaningless death to try and make you feel something #“doing the dragon transformation robs you of your soul forever and you will never return”#*returns via deus ex machina without even letting the player take any part in it but by -getting to the end tm-*#also i HATE how totk constantly dangles set ups in front of you #only to NOT follow up on them #the intro giving you a taste of what you might expect for- NOPE zelda is gone immediately its jsut botw but worse again lol #zelda getting the hang of her time powers so she might return to her time on her ow- NOPE dragon lol her powers are irrelevant actually #impa being the only one you can tell about zelda being a dragon and her going oh no im gonna search for a way to bring her back- LOL NOPE #its solves itself and you dont even do anything for it and just watch a cutscene #oh no link lost his arm and its beyond repair- LOL NOPE have your arm back like it was freshly made no matter how few of the light things-#you actually got- the things that where supposedly to battle back the thing destroying your arm #also howt he game gives you endless busy work without any good reward #krogs - mayoi signa - poes - scematics - lightroots - sign guy

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funzige-gedachten · 2 months ago

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One thing i particularly enjoy about souvenir pop is 80s sound which i also talked about concerning Stephanie. I hear it in lips and mesto duhov aswell, these have an almost post-punk like sound (and Stephanie sounds more new wave to me). And i THOROUGHLY enjoy this. I think it was Nace who mentioned that he really enjoyed the synth-y 80s sounds and that they were playing around with that and i am SO very thankful for that i am LIVING.

#it is probably present in other songs too but i have only listened to them once so far so i cannot remember for sure #but i am absolutely living for naces influence on their music #now for the next album please bring me an oingo boingo or talking heads vibe and i will die👍🏻#or! give me metal #my two favorite genres are (power) metal and post-punk/new wave #so you must understand my excitement here #joker out

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hanzajesthanza · 2 months ago

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a book with geralt 😃

a book with geralt without ciri 😐

a book with geralt without yennefer 😔

a book with geralt without dandelion 💀

#he is going to be going THROUGH IT #he is going to get up to some absolutely poetless behavior #and by that i’m expecting at least one suicide attempt from him #maybe it’s just me and my ‘suffered socially in middle school’ type of memories #but being alone is so soooo painful and going back to that geralt before his best friend and his wife and his child is going to be like #remember when geralt didn’t have much reason to live remember that time in his life #geralt as a near-middle age adult: oh my god this guy is so sad #geralt as a young adult: 😶💀 [speechless at the suffering]#unless dandelion does show up in this somehow but that would pose more logistical questions #imagine we see posada and they meet then and it’s revealed that edge of the world actually takes place with them like 19 and 26 or some #unexpected consideration like… reading eotw back i’m going to be like wait… how old WERE you two here how long ago WAS this #because characters unlike people are immortal because they are ideas #so when you imagine geralt and dandelion even ‘a long time ago’ i just imagine them slightly younger #whatever is done dandelion’s age will never make sense because count 38 and subtract 15. this is his age when ciri was born.#and yet he is hanging out with geralt here in his 30s because friendship is so eternal it slipped the author’s mind to change them #unlike in-universe netwitcher headcanons about jaskier being immortal i believe dandelion is immortal in a meta sense of his presence is so #necessary for geralt’s character that despite logic he must be there for him in the same form no matter the circumstances #geralt and dandelion meeting as young men: [each thinking to himself] ‘huh this guy is stupid and looks gay’#and then an epic best friendship was formed forever. i love you ❤️#the elbow-high diaries

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silvertws · 9 days ago

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My idea of Odysseus and the Odyssey in general has been now clouded by the musical.

It's cool to know what's gonna happen, love having to study that in elementary.

Hey, Odysseus, when are you going to tell your family you're actually leaving again to die at sea? :D

#epic odysseus #epic the musical #odysseus #the odyssey #THIS IS WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN IF I REMEMBER CORRECTLY #GUYS OMERO DID NOT LIKE HAPPY ENDINGS YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND #OH YOU THINK HE'LL GET TO BE WITH HIS WIFE AND SON AND LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER?#WRONG #HE WILL LEAVE AND DIE #BECAUSE THAT'S HIS STUPID DESTINY OR SOMETHING I CAN'T REMEMBER #I swear when I catch Paride #When I catch that idiot #Me and my bestie hate that guy #Ah yes let's kidnap the wife of Menelao surely this won't cause a war #YOU IDIOT #YOU FOOL #ETTORE MY BOY DID NOT DESERVE WHAT HAPPENED TO TROY #“but how is this connected to the Odyssey?” MF #MF DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND #THAT IF THAT IDIOT DIDN'T KIDNAP ELENA #THAT BOTH ETTORE AND ODYSSEUS WOULD BE LIVING HAPPILY WITH THEIR WIVES AND SONS #They could have been great allies #Like I'm being fr they could have #Omero why must you make them suffer?#why must you make US suffer?#I need a happy ending au #I need an au where both Astianatte and Telemachus survive and become friends or something #they go on adventures together and their dads are just like:#“Look at them they're just like us”#“Indeed they are hopefully they won't have to fight Gods or something”

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trashcanwithsprinkles · 2 months ago

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So... so... so... I'm playing the Act 4 Natlan Archon Quest, and uh, (potential very very vague spoilers) but uh... Getting the urge to go reread Cyanide Narwhal for the nth time... If you've played the Archon Quest, did you have any thoughts about it? If not... well, it made me think of your fic, so... Congrats to you!!! <3

i mean i did have thoughts about it but i hardly remember them now LMAO it's been a while, but it was a great quest!!

#to be entirely honestly all i can remember is having yet another bad epiphany about the traveler #like i need more of those #i don't even remember what part of the quest made me have that realization #i just know it was either this quest or one close around it that made it sort of click #the traveler doesn't see the fatui grunts as people lmao #which is hilarious and very in-character for them i must say #but just like with cyno being consistently a cop it's like #i know hoyo. you don't need to keep reminding me they're like that. it's not gonna suddenly make me like them. quite the opposite #not that i dislike them they're just whatever in my mind #though i guess it helps in keeping things straight given i forget they exist for a while #anyway long live capitano i love that man #thank you <3 <3 #ily <3

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zhoufeis · 1 year ago

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