#reijean angst

[12aith]

4 AM Faults

Kisses are fervent, yet sloppy, and the apologetic passion exuding from Reiner's chapped lips churns something deeply unpleasant in Jean's stomach.

This is what Jean gets for letting Reiner have permission.

At first, Jean had been rather open to the idea. Cut a man on a mission some slack — he's a soldier, damn it. A Scout! Tasked with exploring the outside world with intent of understanding more about their greatest enemy: Titans. He deserves, regardless of how fleeting, moments that would help remind him of the pleasures this world has — and has stolen from them.

A chance at a normal life. His real estate property. A shot at settling down once the war is over. Their fucking friend — so beloved, but so naive and now, absurdly powerful.

So, as stupid as it sounds, yes, Jean let this happen.

When Reiner found him in the forest, face cleared of blood from Jean's prior outburst, he had asked Jean what else he could do to make up for it, and Jean's steaming system had conjured the strangest idea yet.

It is an estranged affair between soldiers on either ends of a war. Adding salt to the wound, the forest is an unlikely setting for it.

Reiner sure as hell doesn't waste time. Must be all that waiting for the opportunity to strike… to destroy…

…to kill anyone that gets in the way…

Jean shoves Reiner back to their reality.

"Stop," Jean says, wiping his mouth as if it will cleanse him of this sin. "Let's stop."

Reiner's lips are a thin line. "I thought you wanted—"

"I know that, but can't a guy change his fuckin' mind? Fuck."

Muscles, joints and whatever fleshy gears are in there moved around Reiner's neck. Jean will not deny how sexy that looks, but—

He will admit how much he wants to wrap his hands around it and squeeze.

"Look." He wipes a hand on his face. "I'm fucked, Reiner. I really am."

Reiner seems as though he just choked his own words with his throat.

"You're probably thinking the same." Jean says. "Yeah, you're fucked, too, you're welcome for the validation."

Not knowing what else to do after subjecting himself to such an uncomfortable situation, Jean tilts his body away from Reiner.

"I just can't do this. Not like this, Reiner. Not when I see Marco—"

What is Jean even thinking?

Matter of fact, he isn't thinking. Not with his head, at least.

Pretending like they're still kids does not help at all.

One look in Reiner's way and Jean's blood is boiling at the sight of guilt eating up Reiner's tense frame.

How dare he, when his best friend is dead because of him?

How dare Jean question him, when he's engaging in the same game that gambles with their guilty consciences?

Making out with his best friend's confirmed killer like this, without holding himself accountable…

This is wrong.

"This is wrong," he tells Reiner — echoes it. "I am so fucked for even letting you touch me."

[aruanimess]

all this talk about hobbies got me thinking... what if Reiner tries to get Armin into chess post-Rumbling in an ill-advised attempt to recreate what he had with Bertolt?

I bet it doesn't work either, and not just because nothing can bring a dead person back. Maybe Armin isn't into it, or, well, he is but not as much (that's the real pickle). He'll play with Reiner to bond with his girlfriend's friend/co-Warrior/proxy-brother, but he's more into checkers himself (or even something with an element of luck like backgammon). So he'll indulge Reiner, but his heart isn't into it.

Reiner is not stupid, he can tell. He feels a little condescended to, but he doesn't want to stop either, doesn't want to cut off even this flimsy, mostly self-deluded connection to Bertolt he feels when he plays with Armin. Especially, the thrill he gets when Annie walks in, takes one look at the chessboard and walks back out, just like she was doing when he and Bert were playing in the barracks, and before that in the camps (with the cracked, faded set they had rescued from the trash, with half the pieces replaced by leaves and nuts and pebbles), and before that in Marley. It makes him feel alive again, even if it's for a moment.

The worst bit, the absolute nightmare of a moment, comes when he shares a story with Armin. He's in the middle of explaining some elaborate strategy to him and he starts relating a tale of one of his and Bertolt's games. He tells Armin of how Bertolt tricked him into overcommitting and then turned the tables on him, taking him completely by surprise and winning the game in one fell swoop, and Armin laughs, then smiles and then says: "Oh, I think I remember that."

They don't play again after that.

A few days later, Jean walks into his room, carrying a chessboard underarm.

"I can't believe you asked Armin to play with you, when I'm clearly the superior choice," he says as he sits down.

They set the board.

[cchenyaa]

I added a new chapter!

Chapters: 2/? Fandom: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan Rating: Mature Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Reiner Braun/Original Female Character(s), Reiner Braun & Original Female Character(s), Reiner Braun/Jean Kirstein, Reiner Braun & Jean Kirstein Characters: Original Characters, Reiner Braun, Jean Kirstein, Connie Springer, Pieck Finger, Armin Arlert, Annie Leonhart Additional Tags: Reiner Braun Needs a Hug, Post-Rumbling (Shingeki no Kyojin), Eventual Smut, Fluff and Angst, Fluff, Angst Summary:

In the bustling city of Eldenburg, Yoyo meets Reiner during a night out with friends, sparking an unexpected connection despite their tumultuous pasts. As they navigate the vibrant nightlife, Yoyo grapples with her conflicted feelings towards Reiner, a former enemy now seeking redemption.

[onlyymirknows]

When Jean Met Karina

My submission for Reijean Christmas Week, Day 1! Prompt: meeting each other's parents.

Read on AO3 (link)

Word Count: 7.1k AU: Modern, they're adults in an established relationship Genre: Angst w/ a happy ending (plus fluff and reijean banter) CWs: Reiner gets triggered, past emotional abuse, past character deaths (car accidents), past suicidal ideation, past homophobia, dropping of the f-slur

⋆⁺₊❅⋆ ⁺₊❆⋆

Reiner handed Connie a small notebook, “Everything you need to know is in here but feel free to text me if you got any questions.” He leaned down and traced a small heart on the glass tank, leaving visible smudges. The small turtle near his fingertip glanced at its owner for a second before lazily paddling away to rest on some driftwood.

“I’ve watched him before, remember?” Connie reminded Reiner with a small, exasperated laugh, “He’s in good, capable hands. Don’t worry.”

Jean, noticing the way Reiner’s jaw clenched, squeezed his boyfriend’s shoulder. This was their first time leaving town for Christmas and thus the first time they had to get someone to pet sit in the winter. The scariest season for a reptile keeper.

“Babe, I know what you’re thinking but we specifically got you a native species so you don’t have to worry about the heat as much. Besides, he’s a tough little guy.” Jean forced a grin, hoping to mask his own tense mood. Reiner returned a small smile accompanied by a soft exhale. Bingo. 

Then Jean turned to Connie, “Thanks for watching Bertl for us, Con. We’ll text you when we’re on our way home.”

“No prob, guys,” Connie beamed while ushering the couple to the door, “drive safe and see you next year!”

⋆⁺₊❅⋆ ⁺₊❆⋆

When Jean slid into the passenger seat of Reiner’s truck he noticed a text from Connie, “try not to lose ur mind on reiner’s crazy mom k?” He scowled.

“What’s wrong?” Reiner pulled his door closed and started buckling his seatbelt. He turned the key in the ignition, the car engine purring to life.

“It’s nothing,” Jean muttered while buckling his own seat. He fiddled with the air vents while Reiner picked out some music on his phone. When Last Christmas began playing Jean couldn’t help but shoot a glare at his boyfriend.

“What’s with that sour expression?” Reiner asked incredulously, “It’s literally the 21st of December.” After a pause he added, “There’s no Mariah Carey on this playlist, okay? Just let me have this, Jeanie.”

Sighing, Jean looked out the window at the now moving pavement. “Okay, but once we get through this I get to choose the next playlist.”

Reiner laughed. “Yeah, yeah. As if I was going to torture you with 8 straight hours of Christmas music.” He glanced at Jean for a second with a warm smile while they waited at the red light letting out of their apartment complex. “Y’know, I love you in spite of the fact that you hate fun sometimes.”

Jean cracked a genuine smile for the first time that day. Maybe he did hate what many people would consider fun but it was only because he had taste. Unlike most of these Christmas songs that felt gaudy and artificial. Yet it was hard to deny the joy they seemed to bring his boyfriend so Jean disregarded his own preferences in the second half of December. Sacrifice and all that.

Indeed, his high school friends were confused when he brought a more “lowbrow” guy back with him from college. Then they saw the way Reiner made Jean loosen up and it all made sense. Somehow Reiner could convince Jean to try something new or give another thing a second chance. As if the blond were a siren and Jean a sailor who never dreamed of diving into the ocean.

Sometimes diving into the ocean to swim with a beautiful siren meant meeting a shark. In this case her name was Karina Braun and, as far as Jean was concerned, she was his enemy. Someone to challenge and fend off and—

“We can’t keep avoiding this, Jean,” Reiner paused the Christmas playlist, “do you want to talk about it now or when we’re closer to my hometown?”

The question broke Jean out of his thoughts and he bristled once the words registered in his mind. “What’s there to talk about?”

Reiner didn’t say anything as he merged onto the interstate. Instead he looked over his shoulder to check his blind spot before roving his gaze between his mirrors.

Jean rubbed his eyes, yawning, his own gaze fixed out the passenger window. When Reiner’s silence continued after they’d settled into the flow of traffic he turned his head. He couldn’t help but frown seeing the way Reiner’s fingers gripped the steering wheel, digits clearly tensed. Knuckles turning white.

“Rei, you good?”

“I’m fine.”

“Ugh.” Jean crossed his arms with a huff. “Look, I know I’m not the best at hiding my frustration. But I also don’t see what there is to discuss when you know damn well how I feel. I would’ve rather invited your cousin to come visit us. If it weren’t for the mem—”

“Don’t,” Reiner cut in firmly, his grip on the steering wheel tightening further, “we shouldn’t talk about that. Not right now… Maybe after we swap.”

“Right,” the brunet replied hoarsely, cheeks red, shoulders aching from suddenly tensing them hard as stone. He bowed his head, ashy brown locks slipping down and obscuring his face from view.

“But I shouldn’t’ve suggested talking bout all this right now,” the blond grumbled, “I shouldn’t’ve even said anything to begin with but I’m a dumbass and… yeah.” Reiner turned the music back on, keeping his eyes glued to traffic the whole time.

The two sat unspeaking for a moment, allowing the dulcet tones of Andy Williams to fill the space. Was it really The Most Wonderful Time of the Year? It certainly didn’t feel like it and, well, Jean knew he wasn’t helping. 

Despite his genuine intentions to help, Jean recognized how his stubbornness and results driven mindset could push the envelope at times. Sometimes to the point of causing more harm than good. And selfishly, he didn’t want to alienate his favorite person, so,  as the next song began, he placed a gentle hand on Reiner’s shoulder and gave it a soft squeeze.

“You’re not a dumbass,” Jean reassured, voice regaining its warmth, “I think you’re being proactive and I’m proud of you for how well you’re handling this situation in spite of my bad attitude.”

“As if you’re usually a ball of sunshine,” Reiner muttered, though Jean saw the way the corner of his boyfriend’s mouth twitched. “I guess I want you to at least try being nice. Just try. You know?”

“I will try,” Jean murmured, “but let’s talk about all this later so you can focus on the road. I think that’s a good idea.”

Reiner nodded, his fingers still wrapped tightly around the steering wheel. Jean turned up the stereo before reclining his seat and looking out his window. The snowy landscape rushed by, filling his vision with a blurred field of white. It was oddly beautiful. Mesmerizing, even. Maybe that’s why his eyelids felt so heavy… though it was probably just last night’s insomnia finally catching up to him.

⋆⁺₊❅⋆ ⁺₊❆⋆

A sudden blast of cold air rushing into the cabin jolted Jean from his slumber. He looked up to see Reiner standing outside his open door and the expression on his boyfriend’s face instantly perked him up. Unbuckling himself he turned in his seat to tightly wrap his arms around Reiner who fell into the embrace with a shudder.

“I.. I’m so s-sorry for waking you, Jean,” Reiner whispered breathlessly into his ear, “I just… traffic slowed down to a crawl and I g-got this feeling that..”

Jean hushed him while running a hand up and down his back. Looking past to the world outside he noted they were in an empty parking lot attached to what was probably an office building. Perfect. He took a deep breath before turning his attention back to his partner. 

“It’s okay, I’m glad you woke me up. You did exactly what you’re supposed to, Rei. You did good. Really, really good.”

They stayed in each other’s arms for a couple of minutes while Reiner calmed his shuddering breath. When Jean felt that his boyfriend was sufficiently recovered he insisted on taking the wheel. Originally the two planned on each driving about half of the way there but Jean assured that he didn’t mind driving extra.

“You get full music privileges,” Jean announced as he buckled himself into the driver’s seat, “hell, even Mariah.”

“Jean… it’s o-okay..” Reiner protested while wiping his eyes, “you don’t have to listen to music you hate just for me.”

“But I want to,” he grinned and gave Reiner’s shoulder a playful shove, “I know you would do the same for me.”

“I think I already do that, actually.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean. I don’t really hate any of your music but obscure 80’s ska and Medieval French battle hymns aren’t my favorite,” Reiner hesitated, “sometimes I’m not really in the mood but… I mean…” he trailed off, his mouth forming into a thin line across his face.

“Let me guess, you don’t ask me to change it because you don’t want to be a bother?”

Reiner turned to look at Jean head on and nodded, his lips curling into a faint smile.

Jean huffed. Of course his self sacrificing boyfriend would listen to literally anything Jean wanted. It was true that Reiner was a lot less picky than him. Yet he also felt like a bit of an ass for never asking if Reiner actually enjoyed his more niche music choices.

He reached over to ruffle the hair on the back of Reiner’s head, rolling his eyes as he did so. “You gotta work on this with your therapist more, hon. I want you to tell me stuff like that. I’m here to please you as much as you’re here to please me. I expect some god damn equality in my relationship. Got it?”

The blond’s smile grew wider. “Loud and clear.”

Without another word, Jean leaned over the console while pulling Reiner towards him. Their foreheads connected with a gentle bump and a renewed smile on both of their faces. Jean tilted his head slightly, making a point to nuzzle the crook of his boyfriend’s nose. 

Reiner sighed contentedly in response. He lifted his hand to cup the side of Jean’s face before pressing a soft kiss to his boyfriend’s lips. A silent thank you from one to the other, sweet, but also vulnerable. Like a hesitant knock on the door of Jean’s world where Reiner sometimes felt out of place. Such as now when his emotions were still dizzying and fraught.

Recognizing the call, Jean pulled Reiner in closer, and began peppering kisses all over his face. Forehead, brows, nose, cheekbones, jaw, chin. And the lips, so many flurried pecks to Reiner’s chapped lips. Every one meant to convey the same thing—I want you. I love you.

“Aghh!” Reiner exclaimed through the attack. He let out wonderfully delighted laughs that set Jean’s soul alight with elation. “Mercy, mercy!”

After one final kiss on the mouth, Jean let Reiner go to lay back against the passenger seat. The blond heaved deep breaths, latent laughs slowly dying on his lips. “I love this side of you,” he mused while buckling himself in, “I’m honored whenever you let me see it.”

“Oh shut up,” Jean chuckled, “you make me sound like some humorless dolt.” He turned the key in the ignition then threw the car into reverse.

“Humorless dolt? Not at all. In I fact think you’re very clever,” Reiner replied smoothly, “witty, droll, piquant—”

“That’s enough, Cyrano. Now where do you want to stop for lunch?”

⋆⁺₊❅⋆ ⁺₊❆⋆

The rest of the drive was relatively smooth. Free flowing traffic, no heated discussions, and Reiner chose a music genre both of them could agree on—80’s glam metal. Jean liked the fashion and showmanship while Reiner appreciated the cheese and catchy hooks. It wasn’t until Jani Lane started singing about secrets he just couldn’t tell that the dreaded topic returned.

“Are you sure you’re okay pretending to be roommates in front of my family?” Reiner asked after turning down the stereo. His voice cracked at the end, prompting him to busy himself with his water bottle to soothe his scratchy throat.

“Yeah, that’s okay,” Jean sighed.

“Are you positive? We don’t have to keep it a secret if you really don’t want—”

“I’m positive, Reiner. It’s seriously not a big deal.”

“And you’ll try being nice, right?”

“Oh course,” Jean insisted, albeit gently.

“…Okay,” Reiner moved to turn the volume back up when Jean covered the dial with his hand.

“Do you not trust me, Rei? To keep my cool?”

“It’s not that I distrust you, Jean. You have a cool head. I mean, I was surprised when your friends mentioned how much you fought with Eren growing up.” The thought of teens Jean and Eren fighting brought a smile to Reiner’s face. “But I know how strongly you feel about my mom. I don’t really blame you, either, it’s just that she’s not actually a villain.”

“I know that,” Jean responded tersely in spite of himself. In his periphery he noticed the way Reiner winced and he sighed again. With a softer voice he added, “I understand that she’s a person.”

“But will you keep that in mind when she says something ignorant? Or even just a little frustrating?”

“Reiner, I promise you I will do everything in my power to make this experience as stress free for you as possible. Trust me.” Jean glanced over at his boyfriend with a smile before returning his attention to the road. They were back on surface streets by now, mere minutes away from the Braun household.

The front door of the house flew open upon their arrival, before Jean finished pulling into the driveway, even. It was a teenage girl absolutely beaming from cheek to cheek, eyes scrunched closed in joy. From the passenger seat Reiner let out a quiet gasp and, without a word, hopped out of the car to meet her.

“Reiner!” She squealed excitedly, throwing her arms around his neck and letting him lift her up from the ground. “I’m so happy you came!”

“And I’m so happy to see you again, Gabi. You’ve grown so much!” He gave her a twirl before setting her back on the ground, his own smile dazzling brighter than the strings of twinkling lights surrounding the open doorway. 

Jean hadn’t seen his boyfriend this happy in weeks and he couldn’t help but stare in grateful awe at the scene. Then his eye caught another figure approaching from inside of the house and his mood immediately soured. 

It was Reiner’s mother, Karina. She was short with drabby blonde hair, deep set eyes, wrinkles, and a very familiar nose. Not exactly the face of evil but he knew how looks could be deceiving.

Reiner turned and hugged her with what looked like a beat of hesitation. Jean quickly got out of the car to join them, his protective instincts kicking into high gear. He heard the tail end of a sentence on his approach that made his jaw clench.

“…you’ve gotten so big, Reiner.”

Thankfully he caught himself before his face formed into the nastiest scowl, remembering the promise he’d made minutes earlier. Besides, Jean reminded himself, maybe Karina didn’t mean anything negative by it when she called her son big. Perhaps it was a comment on the fact that Reiner had gotten into weight training since his last visit.

“Thanks mom,” Reiner replied with an awkward chuckle, “I started going to the gym more regularly. So uh, let me know if you need me to lift anything for you while I’m here.”

Okay, so he was right to give her the benefit of the doubt. Except then Jean’s resolve almost faltered yet again when Karina greeted him, leaning past Reiner and smiling at him.

“Ahh so this is your roommate Gene, I take it? It’s nice to meet you, dear.” 

Of course she said his name wrong. Fucking Gene, as if he were a pair of denim pants. His hazel eyes narrowed dangerously, preparing the most passive aggressive response possible when Reiner suddenly jumped in with a correction.

“No, mom. It’s Jean. Kind of like fawn but with a J.”

“Oh!” She exclaimed with wide eyes, “I’m sorry, I had no idea. It’s wonderful to meet you, Jean.” Her expression softened back into a smile as her gaze moved to Reiner’s truck. “How about we get everything inside? It’s starting to get chilly.”

⋆⁺₊❅⋆ ⁺₊❆⋆

“So Jean’s bags should go into the guest room, then?” Reiner asked as they carried the last few things inside with them.

“No, dear, that’s where Gabi’s staying,” Karina responded, “your aunt and uncle are out of town on a couple’s trip with the Grices. I offered to let Gabi stay here.”

“Isn’t it great, Reiner?” Gabi hopped excitedly between each foot, practically jogging in place. “Just like old times! Remember how my parents and I would stay over for Christmas Eve and we’d all wake up together the next morning?”

Reiner nodded, “I do remember. You’d kick me out of my room and I’d sleep on the couch.” Though the wording sounded bitter the smile on his face indicated he felt quite the opposite. “So I’m guessing I’m on the couch while Jean’s in my old room? I’ll take my stuff to the living r—”

“Ahh, no,” his mother interrupted, “Falco will be on the couch.”

“Falco?” Jean found himself asking, trying to place the vaguely familiar name.

“My boyfriend!!” Gabi practically shouted. Reiner looked surprised before quickly recovering into a warm smile.

“Also a family friend,” Reiner elaborated, “his parents are the ones traveling with my aunt and uncle. I’m guessing my mother agreed to let him stay over, too.”

“I did, yes. He’s currently visiting his brother out of state but he’ll be here in a couple of days. I know it’s… unusual but do you mind sharing a room?”

“I don’t mind,” Jean replied, practically holding his breath. Was this for real?

Karina lowered her voice so only the two men could hear her, “Thank you. I obviously can’t let those two share a room, even if they’re both 18. It wouldn’t be decent.”

Oh. Of course it was a concern about the teenagers having sex. Jean held in a sigh while Reiner hurriedly ushered him upstairs to his childhood room, saying something to his mom about coming back down soon for dinner.

⋆⁺₊❅⋆ ⁺₊❆⋆

“Looks like we lucked out,” Reiner muttered after closing the door shut behind him, “though I’m surprised she didn’t insist on finding me a sleeping bag so we didn’t have to share the bed.”

“Maybe she’s trying not to push her luck,” Jean sat down on said bed and looked around the room. Any decorations Reiner may have put up as a teenager were long gone. Her son had been out of the house for close to a decade at this point so perhaps that was warranted but it still rubbed him the wrong way.

“Did you know your mom sanitized your room like this?”

Reiner shrugged and plopped down on the bed next to him. “No, but it doesn’t bother me, either. I don’t want to be reminded of the old days, anyway… it’s not like they were good.” As nonchalant as he probably tried to sound, the edge in his voice gave him away.

Jean frowned and wrapped an arm around Reiner’s shoulder, pulling him in for a sideways embrace. “Don’t say that, Rei,” he leaned over to whisper into his partner’s ear, “maybe you didn’t have any good days in this room but we wouldn’t be here right now if your entire life before college was exclusively miserable.”

“You’re right,” his boyfriend pressed their foreheads together gently, amber eyes closing, “I owed Porco a visit, anyways.” A single tear rolled down Reiner’s cheek as he took a shuddering breath, “Sometimes I can’t help but still feel like they’re both my—”

“Hey, hey, don’t go there,” Jean cut in, hands quickly cupping the other man’s face, “I… I understand, you know that. And I also get you can’t exactly help it sometimes but I’m also not gonna let you just say it. Because it’s not true. It was never true. Never.”

In his mind Jean thought the words he wouldn’t dare speak aloud right now. Not as Reiner began weeping quietly, tears seeping into the cracks between his own face and Jean’s supportive palms.

It’s not true, no matter what your mom told you.

⋆⁺₊❅⋆ ⁺₊❆⋆

Over the next couple of days Jean found himself on high alert. Despite the fact that Karina never said anything outwardly hostile, he couldn’t help but notice her frequent attempts to get her son alone. As far as he was concerned, no good could come from such an interaction.

Thus he made sure to intervene every single time, practically gluing himself to Reiner’s hip. Somehow he managed to do so without any pleading expressions from his beau. No desperate glances silently screaming for Jean to behave.

Instead Reiner thoroughly enjoyed himself, catching up with his baby cousin and introducing her to Jean. Gabi, while initially a shock to the senses with her loud voice and frequent exclamations, quickly grew on him. She was spunky, reminding Jean of a younger version of himself.

All the while Karina stood on the sidelines, watching. Occasionally she made some attempt at joining in on the conversation but often failed to connect. Gabi also made some efforts to bring her in on some topic or another but the old hag was usually too clueless to contribute. Talk about satisfying.

Jean smiled every time she made eye contact with him, imagining how much Karina probably hated him for not letting her sink her claws into his man.

Everything changed when he woke up alone on the morning of the 24th. The moment he realized Reiner wasn’t there he grabbed his phone to check the time. It was 7:18, meaning he hadn’t grossly overslept. Then Jean noticed a text message from Reiner from around an hour ago.

“Gabi begged me to pick up Falco from the airport with her. Should be back before breakfast.”

He sighed in relief, happy that Reiner was occupied by Gabi and not his mother. Speaking of, Karina usually served breakfast around 8, meaning the three should be back soon. 

Jean got up from bed and commenced his morning routine: showering, brushing his teeth, skincare, and of course haircare. By the time he wandered downstairs in some comfortable clothes it was already 7:55. Reiner and the kids were due back any minute. He sat down at the kitchen table and did a crossword on his phone while he waited.

Karina stood by the stove cooking up something for all of them to eat. If Jean had to give her credit for something, it was her cooking. Even something as simple as scrambled eggs and bacon smelled absolutely divine coming out of her kitchen. Had she been any other person he would’ve jumped at the opportunity to learn her secrets.

“Here you go, Jean. I’ll pour you some coffee, too.”

A plate with some eggs, sausage, and toast suddenly appeared on the table before him. He looked up at her, surprised that she would serve him breakfast before everyone else was present. The past couple of mornings they always waited for everyone, no matter how much Gabi insisted she was dying of starvation.

As if reading his mind Karina spoke up again, “Gabi told me they were running late and would grab breakfast on the way home. So it’s just us two this morning.” She placed a decorative mug of black coffee next to Jean’s plate. 

The mug was Christmas themed with little reindeer flying through the sky pulling Santa’s sleigh. Except instead of being cartoonish it was elegant and minimalist. White silhouettes on a black background with smooth looping script wishing him a Merry Christmas. Okay, maybe he had to give her credit for her tastes in drinkware, too. It was a wonder where Reiner got his adorable but tacky tastes.

He sipped on the drink, still piping hot from the coffee press, while Karina brought her own plate over and sat across from him. They ate in silence, Jean practically gluing his eyes to his phone screen to avoid catching her gaze. Without Reiner’s presence there to rein him in, the temptation to tear into her only grew. 

He just had to hold out until Reiner and the kids came back.

“They probably won’t get here until lunch,” Karina suddenly stated right as Jean finished the last bite of food on his plate. The way she said it sounded so certain. Probably? That was definitely a lie for appearances. She knew they wouldn’t be back for a while.

Jean swallowed hard, eyes finally snapping up to look at Karina. “Why do you say that?”

“I asked Gabi to buy me some time, and so she lied to Reiner about when Falco’s plane landed,” she replied, expression stony, “I thought, if you won’t let me talk to my son then I might as well talk to you instead.”

“Oh yeah?” He asked, raising an eyebrow, “What did you want to talk about?”

“Are you the reason my son won’t answer my calls anymore? Why he blocked me on social media? Why I haven’t seen him since my mother’s funeral several years ago?”

“You’re damn right I’m the reason,” he declared, feeling a fiery heat ignite in his soul, calling forth the fury he’d contained over the past few days. One built up by years of watching his best friend suffer from deep emotional wounds primarily inflicted upon him by this woman. Jean clenched his fists, mentally preparing himself for what felt like an ensuing battle. 

She frowned, the wrinkles in her forehead growing more pronounced. “Why did you do that?”

“Why?” Jean laughed haughtily, his almond eyes brimming with deep disdain. “Because you make him absolutely miserable. He can’t help but love you as his mom but I saw the way Reiner deflated after every phone call with you. How he’d get so anxious about every little mistake he made. And, unlike you, I got Reiner the help he needed. I supported him through that process and eventually helped him find the courage to finally cut you out.”

“Then why are you even here?” She asked, eyebrows furrowing further in what looked like frustration, “And why for so long? Why stay here until after New Years?”

Jean scoffed, “It’s not to see you, if that’s what you’re thinking.”

“For Gabi, then?”

“No, if it was just about Gabi then I would have invited her to come visit us for the holidays. Falco, too. He sounds like a nice kid.”

Karina pursed her lips, mouth forming a thin line across her face. To Jean’s surprise, though, she stayed silent, evidently waiting for him to continue.

He hesitated, unsure if he wanted to elaborate. None of this was any of her business, after all. Except he wanted her to feel bad. To feel guilty for all of the cruel and messed up things she did and said to Reiner over the years. And, well, he only promised to make the trip stress free for Reiner who wasn’t there to bear witness… What if Reiner just never found out?

“We’re here to pay our respects to Marcel and,” Jean gazed at her with all of the intensity he could muster, “Bertholdt. Though you might know him better as that wretched sinner or, I don’t know, that disgusting faggot?” He paused for a moment, taking in the way she winced when he repeated her words back to her.

“I could scarcely believe it the first time Reiner told me about their deaths,” Jean spat, “how you screamed at him for killing Marcel. I mean, how dare you blame him for that? And for what? Because if he hadn’t skipped his extracurricular that day then he wouldn’t have been there to cause the accident?”

She bowed her head, staring intently at her hands to avoid confronting the deadly look on Jean’s face.

“As if Reiner had any control over the driver who ran the red light when they were all crossing the street. As if he chose to have his friend push him out of danger to take the hit himself! Marcel, a dear friend, died and you had no sympathy, no compassion for your son. It’s been 15 years and he still carries that guilt with him. Still blames himself.”

Tears of indignation started welling in the corner of Jean’s eyes but he quickly blinked them away. It’d be a cold day in hell when he showed any signs of weakness to this witch.

“And you didn’t even get him help! He watched a friend get hit by a car and you couldn’t be bothered to get him in to see a therapist. And I know you had the resources. Unlike Bertholdt’s father who wanted to get his son into therapy after also witnessing the accident but just didn’t have the right insurance. You realize that Reiner and Bertholdt practically held each other together after that, right?”

Surprisingly Karina responded with a single nod of the head. Yet she continued staring at the table, her expression unreadable. He knew he could stop here, having likely gotten his point across but fuck that. It wasn’t close to enough.

“If you knew how much your son relied upon that friendship then why did you tear them apart? Huh?”

Karina hunched further forward in her seat, elbows now propped up on the table so she could hold her head. She didn’t even attempt a response, which only served to piss Jean off more.

“We both know it’s because you walked in on them sharing a kiss! A simple peck on the lips and you lost your goddamn mind! You grounded your son for the rest of the school year and forbade him from seeing his best friend! They didn’t even know how they actually felt about each other but you didn’t hesitate to demonize an innocent teenager! One you’d known for years at that point, no less!”

Jean banged his fist on the table with a frustrated grunt, causing the dishes to clatter from the force. She flinched in response but still hung her head low, refusing to face his fury. He took a moment to catch his breath before continuing his condemnation. “The night Bertholdt died he was driving here to see Reiner. Not to have some secret affair but because your son was at the end of his rope.”

Finally she raised her head, looking at him with a hollow, wide eyed expression. 

“That’s right. Reiner started talking about hurting himself and his best friend rushed here despite your warnings in order to save your son…” for the first time Jean hesitated, temporarily uncertain if he should throw the finishing blow. Then he remembered the look of devastation on Reiner’s face the first time he heard this story and he knew it had to be done.

“Did you know that they were on the phone together? Bertholdt didn’t want to leave Reiner alone for a second, afraid of what might happen if he did. As a result Reiner heard all of it. The crash, the screams of pain, and then the emergency workers frantically pulling Bertholdt from the wreckage, shouting about the blood loss and—” 

“Stop!” Karina sobbed desperately, her suddenly visible eyes pleading with Jean to grant her mercy. The look on her face, the hint of remorse he sensed in her, made him take pity and skip the rest of the gory details.

“The only reason we’re even here talking right now,” Jean growled, “the only reason your son is still alive, is because he had other people to carry him through. First he had his friends here in town and then he went to college and found me. I saw how much he was hurting and I encouraged him to finally talk to a professional. Now he’s flourishing and I’ll be damned if I let you undo any of his hard earned progress!”

What he heard her say next didn’t make any sense. Jean couldn’t help but think he’d misheard Karina through her sobs and gasps for air. But then she said it again and again. So many times that it became unmistakable.

“Thank you.”

“What? Why the hell are you thanking me?”

“Because,” Karina suddenly reached across the table to grab one of Jean’s hands. In any other situation he would immediately pull away but his instincts told him to wait. “Jean, dear, I’ve been trying to get Reiner alone to ask if he would consider going to family therapy with me.”

“Wait, what?”

“After Reiner cut me off.. I was a complete mess. At first I was so angry. How could my baby forsake me like that? After everything I sacrificed to raise him. But then the anger, it turned into despair and I could hardly function. When I went in for a medical appointment, the doctor convinced me to see a therapist for my depression. It took years but eventually I realized how much I’d let down my dear son.”

Jean stared at Karina, too stunned to even notice that now he was crying. Not from righteous anger but from utter confusion. For all of the times he had daydreamed about putting this woman in her place he never imagined such a response.

“If you hadn’t convinced Reiner to shut me out I never would’ve gotten the help I needed. I never would’ve worked on my own issues and understood how I took them out on him. I failed him as a mother. I know that now.” She let go of Jean’s hand to grab a tissue box and set it on the table between the two of them.

“Hold on,” he watched as she pulled a tissue to dab at her eyes, “if you already knew you’d done wrong by Reiner then why did you let me tell you off like that?” Jean grimaced now as he thought back on the comments he’d just made. The fierce condemnations. The unapologetic jabs.

Karina smiled weakly, “Well… I guess I wanted to understand how you saw the situation as my son’s life partner.”

“That’s reasona— WHAT,” Jean bolted up from his seat, “what did you just call me!?”

“Reiner’s life partner,” she repeated gently, her smile widening.

“You knew this whole time!?”

Karina nodded.

“How?!” Jean slammed his palms down on the table, rattling the tableware yet again. 

This time, instead of flinching, Karina couldn’t stop herself from laughing. A goofy, genuine laugh that rumbled from her stomach and up through her chest. A laugh that sounded exactly like Reiner’s when he felt light and carefree. When he was happy.

“Gabi and Reiner are friends on social media, dear,” she finally explained after containing her amusement. “He isn’t shy about your relationship. And Gabi isn’t shy about, well, anything. I don’t think she realized that I wasn’t supposed to know when she told me.”

“Why didn’t you say anything?”

“Well,” Karina sighed, her smile quickly fading, “I… I didn’t want to stress Reiner. Or you, for that matter. With how bigoted I used to be, I wasn’t sure if either of you would believe me if I said I was okay with it, either.”

Jean nodded, finally allowing himself to smile. He sat back down at the table and leaned back in the seat. Without saying anything, Karina grabbed Jean’s nearly empty cup of coffee and brought back a fresh pour.

“We have a few hours still,” she reminded him, “If you’re up to it, I think it would be nice to start over.”

He considered her offer for a second, a smug smile crossing his face. “Sure but on one condition.”

⋆⁺₊❅⋆ ⁺₊❆⋆

The last thing Reiner expected to hear when he threw open the door of his mother’s house after hours of waiting around at the airport was raucous laughter. Especially not Jean’s laughter, at that. He kicked off his shoes and hastily ran into the kitchen where he discovered Jean gleefully laughing at a photo album.

“Oh, that picture of him dressed as a yam?” Karina asked with a chuckle. She was back at the stove, putting the finishing touches on their lunch.

“Is that what that is?” Jean questioned with a wide, mischievous smile. His eyes were glued to a polaroid of a young Reiner wearing a lumpy reddish-brown blob of a costume. “Was this for some Thanksgiving play or something?”

Reiner froze in place, mouth hanging open. Wide eyed, he glanced back and forth between the duo, too shocked to speak.

“No, no” she replied cheerfully, “that was for Halloween. Reiner really, and I mean really, loved sweet potatoes back then. I borrowed his aunt’s sewing machine and tried throwing something together for him. It admittedly wasn’t very good.”

Jean cackled. He flipped to the next page, grinning at more pictures of the yam costume while sipping on some water.

“Hello Ms. Braun, thank you for hosting me,” a gentle voice suddenly came from Reiner’s side and drew everyone’s attention. Falco stood in the doorway of the kitchen holding a small tin. “Colt baked these cookies for us to enjoy.”

Without skipping a beat Jean got up from the table to shake Falco’s hand and introduce himself. Then he gestured for the young man to follow him to the stove where Karina once stood.

Reiner looked down to see his mother gazing up at him, a nervous smile adorning her face. She gently grabbed his arm and led him to the next room while Gabi passed them to join the others.

“Mom, what’s going on?” He asked quietly, eyebrows still stuck high on his forehead.

“I asked Gabi to keep you busy for a while so I could talk to Jean,” Karina let go of her son’s arm to rest her hands at her sides. That alone was unusual to him, having grown accustomed to his mother clinging to him when they were in such close proximity. She continued, “I’m sorry for the tricks but I realized I needed to get your boyfriend on my side if I wanted to talk to you. And yes, I’ve known this whole time. Gabi told me a while ago.”

“Gabi told you I had a boyfriend? But then why—” Reiner cut himself off and shook his head, realizing that it really didn’t matter why his mother played along with the roommate story. Not when she referred to Jean as his boyfriend without a shred of contempt in her tone.

“Reiner, I’m so sorry,” Karina looked away for a moment to wipe her watering eyes, “I know I hurt you so much.”

He blinked back tears of his own. Was this real? “It’s… it’s okay, mom, r-really…” Reiner stammered, suddenly overcome with an indescribable feeling of guilt. One that he often felt when thinking about his mother but never understood.

“My dear boy, it’s not okay. I am your mother and I failed you. After talking to Jean I realized that I failed you even more than I thought. I wouldn’t blame you if you never forgave me.”

“Wait,” he protested, “that man, my dad, took advantage of you when you were still just a teenager and then abandoned you with his child. And then.. grandma and grandpa, I didn’t see it back then but I see it now. I see how disappointed they were. You hardly knew peace a-and they treated m-me like an extension of you. I… I can’t b-blame you for wanting me to meet their expectations.”

Karina shook her head, choking back tears. Reiner could see the way she fought against her own desire to pull him into a hug and it broke his heart. As often as Jean had encouraged him to be angry at his mother, he rarely ever could. 

That guilt, he suddenly realized where it came from. And that was from the knowledge that his very existence made Karina’s life infinitely harder. How every little mistake he made was weaponized against her by his grandparents. The only ones he ever knew and also the ones who silently saw Reiner as a mistake. 

It’s not like they were wrong, either.

Yet Karina didn’t stop shaking her head in disagreement, fighting against her own emotions to find her voice. “None of what you said, about your father or my parents or my age,” she croaked, barely understandable, “none of that was your fault.” She muffled a sob with her hands. 

“You didn’t choose to be born, Reiner. And maybe… maybe I didn’t choose to give birth, but it’s not an excuse for how I treated you. Or how I treated poor Bertholdt. You were just kids and I… I had n-no idea th-that you… or that h-he… it’s all m-my f-fault…”

Reiner sucked in a sharp breath, immediately understanding his mother now knew about that awful night. Without hesitation he pulled her into a strong embrace, unable to contain his own sobs. Karina whimpered innumerable apologies and for once he let her without protest. 

Deep down Reiner somehow knew that both of them needed this. His mom needed to apologize for her wrongdoings. He needed to forgive himself for every one of those wrongs for which he had ever accepted the blame. This was them, finally healing. The first step of countless many in a journey that already felt infinitely easier.

⋆⁺₊❅⋆ ⁺₊❆⋆

That night five of them sat around the kitchen table, laughing and playing some of their favorite board games. Karina sat out of some of the rounds but, unlike the previous days, she was very much part of the conversation. Jean still struggled at times to hold his tongue after she said something questionable but he cut himself some slack. He knew this was a process for him, too.

When he and Reiner finally retired to their room his heart felt much lighter. As did his boyfriend’s for that matter, (though he was a little tipsy, too.) It didn’t take long before Jean felt Reiner lightly snoring into the back of his neck, the latter insisting on being the big spoon that night. He smiled to himself as sleep gradually came to claim him, too.

Never in Jean’s dreams did he ever imagine liking Karina Braun. Perhaps it was a Christmas miracle. Or perhaps, as was sometimes the case, he assumed the worst of someone he never met in the process of fighting for someone he loved. He didn’t question it, however, just happy that he agreed to give her the chance.

⋆⁺₊❅⋆ ⁺₊❆⋆

A/N: Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed! If there is enough interest I might write a second part where reijean go on a double date with pokupiku and pay their respects to Marcel and Bertholdt.

[mhdensarantakaikafes]

It was my birthday yesterday and one of my best friends got me attack on titan vol 34 as a gift 'cause they knew I wanted to get it for a while now.... so anyway where's that one post that was like "drinking game take a shot every time Jean screams Reiner's name"? because besties... mission impossible fr (I'm focusing on reijean because otherwise it's angst premium ahahahahaha. haha. help)

[lilaclotuses]

Hello! Do you have any ReiJean Valentine’s Day headcanons? 👀

Thank you for the ask!

Listen. Listen. My brain does not do fluff. But I have plenty of general (angsty or angst-adjascent) reijean headcanons that y'all can cry over on V-Day. Going under the cut. >:)

1. Reiner never forgets how Jean saved his life in Shiganshina. It haunts his dreams. Out of all the things that make him feel guilty, it's knowing that his enemy wanted to save him. He sort of fixates on Jean after that, more than anyone else from Paradis, and comes to view Jean as a kind of bundle of pure pureness. (It's almost infantilising.) He thinks that, if there's one person he absolutely does not want to kill, it's Jean.

2. Karina never fully accepts Jean. She sees Jean and Reiner get closer, but in her eyes, a Paradisian is a rung below a mainland Eldian (even after the Rumbling) and she never shakes that mindset. Reiner chooses Jean anyway, but it hurts, because he'd rather have everyone he cares about involved in his life.

3. Role reversal AU because I am starved for that shit. Reiner is a genuinely well adjusted, respectable member of the scouts (no Marleyan puppetry! Reiner is a silly goofy boy), and he finds Jean kind of annoying at first, but slowly starts to respect him. He feels like an idiot when Jean turns out to be the Armoured Titan because Jean was always off! He was always a bit of an abrasive asshole! Reiner should have known.

And then we have Jean, who absolutely cannot handle the weight of killing so many people and responds to it even worse than canon Reiner. He actually seriously considers abandoning the mission and assimilating into Paradisian society. He's heartbroken to disappoint someone like Reiner, whom he admired and looked up to despite everything.

[julietkirsh]

Hi! Just dropping by this secondary blog to post fanfics and such, hope you enjoy 'em!🎶

As said in the description, I'm currently writing for Bungou Stray Dogs, Jujutsu Kaisen and Attack on Titan, but who knows what'll happen from now on?

(probably the same things I've been doing since forever)

If anyone's interested, here's my AO3 profile: julietkirsh

More about the works you'll see there under the cut!⏬️

Attack on Titan

The Sound of Grief (posted on March 15th, '22)

The first and only Gallirei fic I have ever wrote, it consist of three chapters and it's complete (one of the veeery few that met their conclusions💀).

It is set before the events of the narrative arc that is currently being shown in the anime, and contains minor spoilers from much older manga chapters.

It is about finding a kind of fleeting solace in relations dictated by loneliness and grief, and the inevitabe emptiness that follows.

When the Sun Went Down on Us (last updated on November 22nd, '22)

This is meant to be a long one, and even if it's been months since I've last updated it, I have still intention to continue it up to the end (I have posted two chapters out of approximately twenty eight in total, so it's going to be a slooow journey) and I also have many chapters already planned out, so it's not completely abandoned!

This one is full of spoilers since it's canon compliant and also set after the end of the manga, so I don't recommend it for those who would prefer to avoid them⚠️

The main couple is Reijean (I think the official ship name is this one, but I'm not entirely sure yet) and both of them present a good share of difficulties and traumas while dealing with the horrible thing that life can sometimes be, so the story is full of angst to say the least.

.

.

Bungou Stray Dogs

The Fate Of Traitors

Dazai dies, and Chuuya has a hard time processing his unspoken feelings and mourning altogether.

Or at least, this seems to be the plot, or is it?

Basically my mind exploded and decided that this story needed a plot twist and also Meursault, overall it came out full of angst, death, blood and other incredibly happy things.

It's Called: Freefall (posted on January 6th, '23)

Inevitably Soukoku, this one shot has its own conclusion! It's pretty short and full of thoughts about delicate matters of life and death, and it is inspired by the song that gave it its title.

Nothing more to add, there are spoilers from the early seasons of the anime but nothing too severe.

How to Rip A Heart Apart (last updated on January 26th, '23)

Also Soukoku, it is a multichapter story (nothing longer than five chapters in total) and I've already begun to write the second one, so it will see the light, eventually. This one contains spoilers from both the main story and other spinoffs, but they are all listed in the summary.

It gets pretty graphic and violent, the main characters tend to act like assholes in this one (as if they usually are slices of cake😅) and lots of people get unalived.

Angst everywhere and also some canon compliant inaccuracies (you'll find them in the first chapter which I think I'll revise and correct sooner or later) but overall it is going to be lighter than my other stories, or at least I hope so.

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Jujutsu Kaisen

In Dreams

My first jjk AND stsg fanfic, written by tears and hurt alone, it is set a few months after the infamous events of volume 0.

It mainly focuses on Satoru, burdened with the neverending task of holding the whole sorcery world together but still incapable of letting his past go once and for all.

He finds shelter in his sporadic dreams, in the long lost image of a youth that will never return, until he can't help but mix up reality with what his sleeping self begins to perceive.

It all goes downhill from there.

[oxygenbefore1775]

Headcanons

AoT Warriors As Ghosts

AoT Warriors with usually quiet s/o snorting while laughing

Ghost Warriors vs Ghoul Boys (from Buzzfeed Unsolved)

AoT Characters Staging Romeo&Juliette

AoT Alliance At A Restaurant

Jeankasa Headcanons

AoT Warriors Dealing With A Crying Toddler

AoT Alliance's Dating Advice For Falco (crackpost)

AoT Warriors And Alcohol Of Their Choice

Marleyans As The Things I Did In My Childhood

AoT Warriors Seeing A Spider

AoT Warriors And Their Cooking Skills

AoT Warriors As Roommates

Reipikujean NSFW Headcanons

Baby Daddy!Porco Headcanons (pt1, pt2)

Yeager Jr. At The Warriors' Office

AoT Warriors Losing Their Kid In A Shopping Mall

Jikupiku Headcanons

AoT Warriors' Comforting Methods

AoT Warriors Teaching Their Kid How To Swim

AoT Warriors At A Pool Party

AoT Warriors Stranded On An Island

AoT Warriors At A Christmas Market

Porco With A Short S/O

AoT Warriors At A Family Gathering

Kabedon Headcanons (reiner, porco)

Fics

The Home To Return To (jeankasa postcanon fluff)

If This Feeling Flows Both Ways (reijean smut)

Cloaked Under The Night (jeankasa love confession)

Scenarios

Jeankasa Dealing With Jealousy

Jeankasa And The Challenges Of Being Young Parents (feat. Connie)

Jean's First Months In The Cadet Corps (jeanmarco)

Assigning Household Chores During Mikasa's Pregnancy (jeankasa)

Falbi And Memory Loss (modern au)

Jeankasa Vampire AU

Oneshots

Trying On Their Red Armband (warriors x reader)

Vacation With Zeke (modern au zeke x reader)

Someone To Lose (postcanon jeankasa angst)

After A Visit To The Dentist's Office ( modern au, warriors x reader)

Helping You Carry The Weight (modern au, warriors x reader)

Not Mad Just Dissapointed (modern au, reiner x reader)

When There's Too Much Alcohol In The System (Porco, Reiner, Zeke)

last updated 13/02/23

[maagicmiss]

OwO reijeankasa is actually one of my fav !!! I’ve even been drawing some of it eheh. It’s the perfect mix of my ships x)

Your headcanons for Jean/Mikasa/Reiner... you ruined me and for that I thank you XD I'm not going back!

I think I just created an OT3 hell and you're the third person who dropped in by surprise haha You're welcome & You Are Welcomed! 😆 (At this point in canon where the degree of their mortality rates are getting lower and lower, I'm all for these three to find even a sliver of happiness with each other by the end of the series 😢)

Please, dear, have a sit. Let's have some tea & let's talk OT3 💖

After all, a Queen deserves a King. But a rare Queen deserves two or more Kings hey ho 🙆 #MikasaHarem2021

[firesofdainix]

Pairings: Reiner Braun/Jean Kirstein

Summary: Ten years after the events of the manga (up to ch 138), Jean Kirschtein and Reiner Braun live in the middle of nowhere, their only company each other.

Other Tags: Past Marco Bott/Jean Kirstein, Past Reiner Braun/Bertolt Hoover, Angst with a Happy Ending, Unrequited Love, Post-Rumbling (Shingeki no Kyojin), Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan Manga Spoilers, Reiner Braun Needs a Hug, No Plot/Plotless, Domestic Fluff, Domestic Bliss

hey... Reijean fans... where you at?

[jeanbeaux]

I feel like the craziest I get with rarepairs is reijean but really I just want anyone and everyone to love my husband

OHHH…..I LIKE THIS ENERGY

i feel like the sad boi hours would be high with these two …. but they would have so much love for each other too

i dont wanna even think about the angst potential this has in canon with marco but the ✨healing✨

also threesome with reijean??? sign me up for that soft dom loving please!!!

send me your fave rare pairs!!

[onlyymirknows]

The Curse of Living

Summary: Jean finds Reiner crying in his tent six months after the rumbling

CW: detailed description of suicide plan/attempt, swearing, angst, emotional hurt and comfort, implied reijean, Reiner’s pov, mostly dialogue

WC: 1.4k

• ───────────────── •

Reiner Braun is overwhelmed. It was so easy to suppress all of his built up emotions when he thought he only had a couple of years to live but now? Now he is falling apart at the seams with decades ahead of himself to endure.

At least it feels that way. But with all of the people relying on him in the wake of this disaster he has to pretend he’s strong. How has it only been 6 months?

Part of him wants to ask for help but the other part of him is terrified of the prospect. Who is he to ask someone to help him of all people? So he finds himself alone in his tent, crying from the stress. Here in the quiet of the night when he should be sleeping is the only time and place he has just for himself.

Except when he doesn’t, of course.

Like right now, when Jean Kirschtein crawls into the tent uninvited, concern clearly written on his face.

“Kirschtein, what are you doing here? Without asking, too.” Reiner wipes his face off as best as he can. He knows he’s already caught but wants to preserve some shred of his self respect.

Jean looks at a loss for words, even now that he’s fully inside, kneeling across from Reiner. Why did he come here if he didn’t have something to say? How can he have nothing to say, anyway? He’s Jean, a man who loves the sound of his own voice.

“Did you come here to stare at me?” Reiner keeps his gaze lowered and fidgets with his hands.

“No. You don’t have to be so-” the brunet cuts himself off before finishing his thought. He sighs and scratches the back of his neck. “What I meant to say is I heard you crying and I wanted to be here for you.”

“I didn’t ask you to. You should go to your tent and sleep.”

“That’s kind of the problem, Reiner. You didn’t and haven’t asked. People are worried about you.”

“What, did everyone put together a ‘Bother Reiner’ committee and choose you as their representative? Because you sure are perfect for the job, I have to admit.”

“Oh you think so? Glad to hear you recognize my talent.” He grins, which only makes Reiner feel weird. Normally he likes bantering with Jean but this neither feels like the time nor place.

“But seriously Reiner, talk to me. I know this asshole act is your way of telling me to piss off but I’m not leaving.”

“I don’t know what you want from me. What do you want me to say?”

“I want you to tell me what’s wrong.”

“Everything.” Reiner knows that’s an unhelpful answer but it’s true. Everything is wrong. He is wrong and he isn’t sure how to cope anymore.

“Okay… Let’s try this instead. Tell me one thing that’s wrong. It doesn’t have to be the most important or most stressful.”

“I.. I was supposed to die in a year and a half.”

Jean looks at him with a mix of surprise and pity, which makes Reiner feel worse. He doesn’t deserve pity and he knows that.

“I was ready to die. So fucking ready, Jean. When Eren told me he was going to lift the curse, some part of me nearly snapped. It felt like a cruel joke. The one person in the whole world who understood how I feel gave me the last thing I wanted. He knew it, too, the asshole.” Reiner covers his face with his hands and groans in frustration.

He continues, not caring at this point about Jean’s reaction. This openness was what Kirschtein wanted, after all. “Ymir’s curse was my finish line… my way of dying without completely devastating my loved ones. To finally rest and to stop.. feeling all of this. Now there’s no end in sight and I… I don’t know how long I can do this. But I have to do everything I can. I hav—”

“Shut the hell up, Reiner.”

Now it’s Reiner’s turn to stare, looking up from his hands to gaze at his friend in disbelief. Tears roll down his cheeks again and his body’s shaking. He hadn’t noticed just how worked up he’s gotten. It’s difficult to keep his breath steady and his nose’s leaking just as much as his eyes.

Before he has a chance to compose himself he feels Jean pull him into a bear hug and force his head to rest on the other man’s shoulder.

“Jean.. what are you..”

“I told you to shut it, didn’t I?”

“But what—”

“Shhh. I’m hugging you, obviously,” Jean’s voice is a soft whisper now, “and you just gotta deal with that.”

Reiner nods. He could probably push Jean away if he really wanted to but he doesn’t. It feels nice and Kirschtein smells surprisingly good despite living in the post apocalypse without indoor plumbing.

“Jean, I’m really sorry for—”

“Don’t,” his voice is firm yet still low and comforting. “Don’t apologize. I swear to the walls, I don’t know what to do with you but I’ll figure something out.”

Reiner chuckles slightly to himself, his breath tickling Jean’s neck.

“Oh yeah? What’s so funny, Reiner?” Despite not seeing his face, he can hear the smile in Jean’s voice.

“The walls don’t exist anymore, Kirschtein, you have to find something else to swear to.” He can’t tell if he’s laughing or crying at this point. Or if he’s happy or delirious. His emotions are all jumbled as he continues shedding tears onto Jean’s shoulder.

“You’re right. I’ll have to figure that out, too. But one thing at a time and you’re my top priority.”

“Jean.. part of me wants to kill myself. But I couldn’t do it here where any of you could find me. I wouldn’t do that to you. I’d just.. um. I’d just walk into the desert one night and keep going until dehydration got me. Then the birds would turn me into just another nameless body to add to the pyre.”

“That’s… really fucked up.”

He chuckles again, this time sardonically. “I know… it really is and… I find myself thinking about it m-more and m-more as… as time g-goes on… I. I don’t k-know… I d-don’t know wh-what to do… I… I d-don’t…”

Jean’s arms squeeze him even tighter as he completely falls apart into a crying, sobbing mess. He never expected to tell anyone about this because he feels like he needs to be strong for everyone. That he needs to keep being superhuman despite being a mere mortal now.

“You don’t need to do anything except be Reiner. Just be you. I finally got you back and I want you here for a long time, even if that means you don’t do anything for anybody else for the rest of your life. I know I’m not the only one who feels that way. Your kids, for example. Gabi and Falco love you more than some kids love their parents.”

Jean holds Reiner even closer and sways him ever so slightly like a mother rocking a cradle. Reiner for his part finally wraps his arms around Jean’s waist and digs himself even deeper into his friend’s shoulder.

His voice now muffled, Jean strains slightly to understand Reiner as he says, “I… I almost killed myself before the Liberio Festival. I put a rifle into my mouth and nearly pulled the trigger. But then Falco… he just showed up outside the window. He didn’t even know I was on the other side of the wall. But hearing him out there… I c-couldn’t leave them behind, Jean…”

“Then let’s stick with that for now… You keep living for those kids and I’ll help you with the rest.”

“You really don’t—”

“I want to, Reiner. I really do. So your only job right now is keeping your will to live. Starting tomorrow I’m gonna be on you like glue, like it or not. And don’t you dare say you don’t deserve help. I don’t give a fuck what you think you deserve. I’m not giving you a choice… Okay?”

“Yeah… okay.” Reiner’s voice is hopeful, albeit shaky from sobs. Jean is the most stubborn man he knows and for once he’s completely relieved by that fact.

[onlyymirknows]

Reijean suggestion from @beautyisinkonpaper based off of their hc’s

Plot: Reiner casually brings up a traumatic memory from his past during an intimate moment with Jean. Angst and comfort ensues.

WC: 1.7k

Notes: Not really edited or super proof read since it's just for fun. Also, this is my first time ever writing smut so bear with me lmfao

18+ / minors dni

Jean knew he was in for a good night when after dinner Reiner looked at him with smoldering eyes and announced that he was still so hungry. The two just finished doing the dishes, Jean drying his hands as Reiner finished toweling off the last plate. “Oh yeah?” Jean asked with a smirk. “You have something in mind?”

Reiner didn’t even dignify the question with a response, instead opting to grab Jean by the shoulders and push him against the wall of their kitchen. Jean gasped slightly in surprise, which was music to Reiner’s ears. The start of a seductive symphony he was aching to conduct. With his boyfriend still pinned to the wall, Reiner landed a rough sloppy kiss, forcing himself inside Jean’s mouth and savoring the moan he got in response.

Whenever Reiner got into one of these states Jean knew he need only relax and let the man take charge of the situation. And take charge he did, pulling away from the passionate kiss to suck and bite at Jean’s exposed neck while reaching up a hand to grab his chin, keeping his head in place. Then Reiner hissed directly into Jean’s ear, “Be good for me and take off those pants,” before going back to dine on his throat.

Jean of course didn’t hesitate to comply. They were taking things a little faster than usual but he didn’t need much convincing. Once his pants were down, Reiner inched even closer to press a leg against his bulge. Jean couldn’t help but moan even louder than before and then whimper a little uhh huh when asked if he liked that.

Before he knew it Reiner was kneeling in front of him, taking all of Jean’s length in his mouth. “Ahh f-fuck Reiner. Nngh. You weren’t lying when you.. ah.. when you said you were mmgh still h-hungry.” He could feel the way his boyfriend smiled at that comment, even while sucking on his cock. Reiner for his part felt amazing hearing how much Jean was enjoying himself.

Still, a Jean who could talk was a Jean who hadn’t gotten enough pleasure yet so Reiner doubled his efforts. Sucking harder, bobbing faster, whatever it took to make his partner incomprehensible, he did with enthusiasm.

Soon enough Jean was fucked out of his mind, moaning and yelping just the way Reiner liked it. Not wanting the fun to end quite yet, he pulled Jean's dick from his mouth and started to pump it with his hands instead, intentionally slowing the pace to keep his man on the edge. His plan was to switch back so he could take all of Jean’s load down his throat when the time came but then it happened.

“You know, Jean, your dick tastes way nicer than a gun and it goes down much easier, too.” Reiner didn’t think anything of the statement, too distracted by lust to register how crazy he sounded. Jean almost missed it himself, so caught up in his pleasure that he barely comprehended what was said at first. “Ahh. Wh-what was that, Rei?” He asked with a breathy voice. Then the wheels in his head finished turning.

“Wait.” Jean sobered up immediately and looked down at his partner in horror. “Stop that and look at me, Reiner.” His voice was so assertive that Reiner flinched as he pulled his hands away and looked up to lock eyes with his boyfriend. The jarring transition from passionate bliss to palpable tension left Reiner feeling disoriented. Vulnerable, even.

“D-did you just say you’ve had a gun in your mouth before? When did that happen? Why did it?!” Jean couldn’t hide the distress in his voice, which made Reiner nervous. He shuffled away a little bit on his knees to make more distance between them. Was Jean mad at him? The idea upset him so much that he instinctively started apologizing, tears streaming down his cheeks.

Realizing his mistake, Jean quickly put his underwear back on and then immediately joined Reiner on the floor to give him a huge hug, holding him as tightly as possible. “Shh, Rei, don’t apologize. It’s okay. I’m not mad. We’re good.” It took a few minutes of this before Reiner regained his composure enough to speak again.

Before any discussion happened, though, Jean dutifully sat Reiner back at the table and wrapped their coziest blanket around his shoulders. Then he put the kettle on the fire to boil water for tea. Reiner stared at the table miserably and fiddled with his hands while they waited. Once the tea was ready Jean sat as close to him as possible and coaxed the story of his suicide attempt out of him. They talked late into the night, taking plenty of breaks for Reiner to cry and Jean to comfort him.

Partway through they relocated to their bed, where Jean made sure to hold Reiner until he finished his story and then faded off to sleep. The last thing Jean remembered thinking before he crashed was how he owed Falco a debt of gratitude for saving his man.

——-

The next afternoon Reiner awoke groggy having slept heavily the night before. At first he looked around the room confused by the amount of light beaming through the window. It must have been well past half day, why was he just waking up now? Then the events of the previous night came back to him and he just pulled the covers up over his face.

“Hey Reiner, you awake in there?” Jean walked through the doorway, swearing he heard movement. “I let you sleep in as long as you needed to since we were up so late.” He stepped lightly up to the bed and lifted the sheet that was conspicuously placed over his boyfriend. Underneath he saw Reiner, curled up into the fetal position and crying silently to himself. “Oh, Rei. What’s wrong?”

Jean climbed back into bed and grabbed his boyfriend, pulling him closer. He stroked the blond locks on the back of Reiner’s head, telling his love that everything was okay. Reiner just buried his face into Jean’s chest to sob for a while. They laid like this for what felt like hours until Reiner eventually fell back asleep from emotional exhaustion.

When Reiner woke back up again it was to the smell of his favorite soup, which Jean had waiting for him to eat in bed. “Hey babe,” Jean said with a sweet smile, “I made this for you since you’re not feeling good today.” Reiner nodded in response and offered his thanks, remarking, “I didn’t know we had the ingredients to make this.”

Hearing this made Jean beam, “We didn’t but I ran out and got them just for you while you were sleeping.” He passed a bowl over to Reiner, who started eating after a brief pause.

“This is really good as usual, Jean. Thank you so much, I really appreciate it.” They shared a brief peck on the lips before Jean replied, “Of course. Just for you, Rei.” The rest of the night passed by without incident, though Jean insisted they both get to bed early to catch up on their sleep. Reiner didn’t protest even a little bit and ended up falling back asleep only a couple of hours after the sun had set.

——-

Over the course of the next couple of days Jean did everything in his power to pamper his boyfriend. Cooking more of his favorite meals, being the big spoon in bed, and enduring multiple boring games of chess that he always lost because his boyfriend was just too good. Reiner had been so down since that night and Jean desperately wanted to see him smile again, no matter what it took. However, if anything, Reiner seemed to keep getting sadder.

On the third morning after yet another breakfast in bed is when Reiner finally cracked. “Jean, why are you doing this? Why are you being so god damn nice to me? I..” he held his forehead in his hands, “..I don’t understand.”

“What do you mean, Reiner? That’s just what partners do for each other.”

“No.. But this is different. This is.. this is t-too much. I don’t…” He trailed off, feeling overwhelmed by the thought that suddenly occupied all of his attention. That he didn’t deserve all of this.

Concerned, Jean sat down on the side of the bed next to Reiner and studied the expression on his face. It was unsettling to see that not only was Reiner crying again but that he looked like he was in physical pain. Jean moved Reiner’s hands away from his own face in order to start wiping away some of the tears.

“Hey,” the brunette’s voice was uncharacteristically soft, “what are you thinking? You can tell me anything. We’re on the same team, remember?”

Reiner opened his teary eyes to gaze up at Jean. “I.. I feel like I don’t really deserve this. I don’t deserve you being so nice to me. Not now.. not ever.”

“Rei, we’ve talked about this. You don’t have to keep holding all that over yourself… Wait why are you shaking your head?”

“Look, Jean. I do still mean it when I say that I can never make up for what I’ve done but…” he wrung his hands together nervously. This was really it, then, the time he would finally tell someone. “I’ve never felt like.. l-like I deserve kindness. For as long as I can remember. Usually I just accept it because I know it makes the other person happy but.. but this is s-so much. I feel s-so guilty when you’re this nice to me..”

Jean’s expression fell. He had no clue Reiner felt this way but when he thought about it more it made sense. Of course someone who grew up in his situation could end up feel so undeserving. “Reiner, babe, you deserve all the love I give you and more. And I will tell you that as many times as it takes to get it through your dense skull. Even if I have to tell you every day for the rest of our lives, I think it’s worth the investment.”

To say the floodgates on Reiner’s emotions flew open upon hearing that was an understatement. He started crying more than he had in years, but so much of it was from relief that he couldn’t help but smile. “Jean..” he sobbed, “thank you.”

“There’s that smile I wanted.” Jean leaned down for a kiss, never happier to see his boyfriend crying like a small child.

[lilaclotuses]

Thank you so much for that Reijean angst!! I hope you’re already working on part 2 because I can’t sleep 😈💜💜

You’re welcome! And thank YOU so much for organizing ReiJean week. ❤️

Part 2 is indeed in the works. ✌️😏

[oxygenbefore1775]

If This Feeling Flows Both Ways

pairing: Reiner x Jean

tags: mid second timeskip, confessions, a tiny drop of angst, sensual smut, porn w/plot Ig

cw: maybe some unrealistic male physiology, power-bottom!Jean and subby-top!Reiner, oral, bodily fluids (spit and cum), slight expectorating (maybe icky to someone) pillow talk if you squint

wc: 2,1k

summary: Reiner's wooing of Jean finally paid off when one night he decided to reciprocate the feelings.

a/n: currently havin' reijean brainrot

"Jean," Reiner's voice pierces through the silence in the room.

Jean shrugs his shoulder, his undivided attention dedicated to the writing in front of him.

"Uh-huh," his tone fails to conceal the annoyance at having to prepare the speech at such late hour. "Can you help me out here? What am I supposed to write right here?"

Out of the corner of his eye, Jean can see Reiner scooting closer while having a look at a line being pointed out to him. After a brief moment of pondering, Reiner voices his suggestion which — to Jean's relief and delight — seems to fit perfectly into the word canvas.

Since Armin's begun pairing them together for their duties as the ambassadors of piece, Jean and Reiner have been spending more time in each other's company in comparison to the other Alliance members. Although unaware of Reiner's stance regarding this partnership, Jean couldn't be more happy about the match. With how busy and demanding their job can get, Reiner has been the only one able to put up with his excessive obstinacy and harsh opinions on the better way of work. Besides those merits there's another one that Jean values the most — that being his skill to produce speeches with seemingly no effort. No matter the occasion or the purpose of the speech, Reiner always manages to come up with the right words, precision of which evokes emotions in even the most heartless people. Reiner, however, doesn't deem this extraordinary, chalking it up to his childhood as a Warrior Candidate when he's been writing flattering compositions laced with Marleyan propaganda on the regular basis.

Jean pats him on the back as the sign of gratitude, his hand reaching for a pen to make the proposed corrections.

"This should do it," he announces and blows on the paper to dry the ink. "If Armin decides to veto this draft as well, I will lose my mind right then"

Out of the two of them, it's Jean's speeches that Armin always has a problem with. With five drafts already rejected and the day of the event creeping up on them, Jean's resorted to writing at night. Throughout this challenge of Kirstein's eloquence, Reiner's been sharing his nocturnal lifestyle, ready to help — be it choice of words or mug of coffee. Sure, Braun has a lot of free time since he's written a perfect speech on his first try (did anyone expect anything less?). And still he opts for spending his time like this: confined to the armchair the entire night, occasionally lending a sympathetic ear to nagging Jean. Perhaps it's a partner-thing-to-do, Kirstein assumes.

"You were saying?" Jean looks up at Reiner, finally putting the draft aside.

"I was wondering," he sounds a tad unsure, "What do you want to do when we will be done with the diplomatic mission?"

Jean can't help but to chuckle bitterly at Reiner's words.

"When? It's if. If we will be done with all of this at all," he leans back against the couch, a sigh escaping his lips. "It'll take years for them to start treating us seriously. Now we're merely a menagerie for them, a pack of exotic animals to look at"

Reiner nods in accord, his body tensing up at Jean's harsh words.

"Every time we visit yet another city, it's not the diplomats and ambassadors of peace trying to mend international relations. It's former Titans and Island bumpkins"

"Yes, I remember some journalist asking me if I still could transform into the Armor," the corners of Reiner's lips curve into a faint smirk.

As the memory of that event emerges at the surface of his mind, Jean cackles, more annoyed than amused. Were Jean at Reiner's place, he'd reply with a cheeky remark instead of being at the loss of words and smiling in confusion — just like Reiner did that day.

"I'd like to go home," Jean says with a sudden softness to his voice, returning to Reiner's question, "More than anything. Start a family there"

If someone — Jean can't find it in his heart to say the name — will have him.

Reiner sighs with a downcast look on his face. After a moment of silence his body starts leaning forward so that his gaze is on Jean's features.

"To be honest, I wish this diplomatic mission wouldn't end at all," his tone is quiet and shy, as if confessing a cherished secret.

His words are met with Jean's sceptic look. Reiner's dedicaion to their cause — although admirable to some extent — continues to baffle Jean.

"You take pleasure in wandering the world?"

As soon as the question escapes his lips, he can see blood rushing to Reiner's cheeks. He himself must have felt this, bringing a hand to his face. Such a rare sight to see, Jean notes to himself, solely alcohol can bring Reiner to such state.

The pillows of the couch collapsing under Reiner's weight as he moves closer to Jean, their eyes interlock.

"I take pleasure in being together with you"

In the next moment Reiner leans forward, his lips pressing against Jean's — the impact of his advance sending them both down on the cushions. Air escapes Jean's lungs as he groans, having been pinned down. Reiner is quick to pull away from the superficial kiss — pupils dilated, breath heavy — only to plant another one in the corner of the mouth.

"You... Fuck," Jean is overwhelmed at Reiner's sudden fit of vigor.

His body is in an uncomfortable position and his neck is bent in a weird angle but Jean doesn't have it in him to register those concerns. The sole sensation is someone else's lips peppering his face with quick pecks.

Trying to keep him still, Jean places his hand on Reiner's nape and pulls him into a deep kiss.

"Jean," Reiner whimpers, his mouth still on Jean's lips, "Please tell me..."

Jean's hazed gaze is on Reiner's glazed over eyes.

"Tell me you feel the same"

His voice trembles with pleading.

What does 'the same' entail, Jean wonders. Is it lust that's burning up inside his stomach as he's laying under him? Cloying anticipation of having his skin caressed with Reiner's lips and tongue? Or does this supposed feeling go beyond the whim of satiating their thirst? Jean does feel something — there is no doubt about that — he doesn't know if he can reciprocate with the same depth.

Not keen on voicing his sentiments, Jean licks Reiner's lips, rewarding him with a smile afterwards.

"I don't want to be fucked on the couch in the common room, so I propose we go to your bedroom"

Reiner doesn't have to be told twice — his eyes flaring up like coals, he gets off of Jean and leads him to the door.

Cloaked under the darkness of the bedroom, Jean reaches for the collar of Reiner's shirt with his hands. His sight betrays him, forces him to rely solely on his sense of touch. Reiner's heavy breathing reaches his ear as his fingers make their way down the placket. Suddenly Jean feels his arms being grabbed by the wrists and lifted up — in the next moment slow hot kisses are planted on his palms and knuckles, leaving wet spots.

Freeing his hands gently in attempt not to seem rude, Jean keeps on undressing both of them. Reiner's lips still find him, pressing against the neck right where delicate skin covers a pulsating artery. It takes Jean all the crumbs of composure he has left not to tilt his head back and expose more of his skin to the caresses.

With their bodies finally robbed of covers, Jean takes a moment to run his fingers down Reiner's chest and stomach, noting how quickly and eagerly he responds to the touch. A stifled moan escapes Reiner's lips as he leans forward for a kiss — but Jean deprives him of this and pushes him on the bed instead.

"Let me handle everything," he says under his breath, getting on the bed.

Since his eyes have adjusted to the dim lighting in the room, Jean can see Reiner propping himself up on the elbows. Chest heaving rapidly, mouth half-open — he's waiting for him. Jean is almost teasing as he crawls on all fours towards him, his pace so excruciatingly slow that Reiner swears through his teeth.

Reiner lets out another gasp when he suddenly stops moving. Jean's head near Reiner's crotch, he lies down on his stomach all the while their eyes are locked on each other. In a smooth movement Jean extends his hand, his fingers wrapping around Reiner's girth — his vacant mind rids itself of any thoughts as he starts moving his fist.

"Oh fuck," the words slip out through Reiner's pursed lips.

"You like it?" this ends up sounding saccharine, the success at giving pleasure robbing the voice of any cockiness.

Jean presses his fingers around the tip, squeezing out a little bit of pre-cum and covering the shaft with pale drops. With his palm in thin suspension-like liquid, he deems it good enough of a slick to add velocity to his movements. The strokes having become more coarse and Reiner wincing at every friction, Jean is proven wrong in his assumption. In order to make up for it, he alignes his lips with Reiner's cock, opening his mouth slightly. A string of saliva tickles his tongue as it comes running down on his lower lip, dribbling on the pink tip. With viscous fluid spread along the shaft, Jean lets himself pick up the pace.

The wet sounds of spit-covered skin, the way his palm slides up and down, queit whimpers escaping Reiner's lips — all of it makes Jean's blood run to his stomach. He has never felt something like this before.

Reiner's cock glistening from pre-cum and saliva in the dim light, Jean finds it irresistible not to get a taste. As his tongue sticks out, the tip of it fluttering around the throbbing head. The light kisses planted and hot breath hitting the skin send Reiner over the edge as he squirms in an attempt to evade Jean's touches, too sensitive for them. Jean, however, is quick to wrap one of his arms around Reiner's thigh pinning him down to one place. A mischievious gaze that Reiner gets rewarded with clearly signalizes Jean's intention to keep the sweet torture going.

Out of breath, Reiner collapses back onto the pillows. Carte blanche granted — he smiles as his tongue wets the shaft all the way from bottom to top and the brim of his lips closes around the tip.

"You're so good," Reiner's voice is laced with softness that is not fit for such moment.

It's about to get better, Jean thinks to himself, an idea forming at the back of his head. Slacking his jaw open, he puts Reiner's entire length inside his mouth in one rapid thrust. The head of the cock reaches Jean's larynx, hitting the back of his throat with force.

Taken by surprise, he feels the walls of his throat squeezing around Reiner's girth — tears stinging his eyes. It doesn't help that Reiner, stimulated with pressure, arches his back and starts bucking his hips at a broken pace, slamming into Jean's mouth. He jerks his head away. After a moment of catching his breath, Jean goes into a coughing fit, rubbing his neck in a soothing gesture. The sore walls of his throat are constricting as the coughs expell pale clots that Jean catches with his hand.

"Did you just—" the opportunity to voice his dismay gets taken away from him when Jean feels being taken by his arms and pulled closer to Reiner's chest.

"My bad."

Reiner lifts his face by the chin, his fogged gaze sliding over Jean's features as if to inspect the damages he has left. Thumb brushing against Jean's puffy lower lip, Reiner leaves a kiss there as a consolation.

"I didn't expect you to go ahead and deepthroat my cock," he laughs when Jean rolls his eyes in annoyance, "You were really good for your first time"

Blood rushes to Jean's cheeks since he is unable to refute this words.

"What about you?" Reiner runs his fingers down Jean's sweat-covered chest "I don't want you to be left out"

"No," his voice sounds almost whiny as he rests his head on Reiner's shoulder, his hair all ruffled up. "The sun is rising already and my body hurts. I'll get my share next time"

Out of the corner of his eye, Jean can see Reiner turn to him, holding his breath.

"Next time?"

"Sure, you thought this would be a one-time thing?" Jean's lips curl into a smile.

Reiner turns back away, the look on his face betrays his excitement.

"When are we going to tell them?" Reiner asks innocently.

Jean scoffs at the question.

"They already know. Your affection is so obvious."

(I guess I'm writing smut now)

[oxygenbefore1775]

Before you request

if someone requests something, that is

‧₊˚ ☽ ⋅what i write

characters: warriors (including colt, falco and gabi) + jean ships: jeankasa, reijean, reijeankasa + warrior ships in general

angst & fluff & smut are all my cup of tea

if you want to request smut - there are more talented blogs out there for you to consider since my smut is generally full of dark aspects and generally not intended for pleasure

‧₊˚ ☽ ⋅what i don't write

usual topics not to write about like pedophilia, incest, non-con (dub-con is fine but under very specified conditions) cute jealousy trope i don't like the characters expressing or being subjected to hatred like racism, xenophobia, queerphobia, sexism, ageism, etc. only if it's canon justified (like hatred towards eldians)

‧₊˚ ☽ ⋅nota bene

please be nice when requesting please be as clear as possible – chances are that stupid me won't understand what you're requesting it's preferrable that you specify whether you want sfw or nsfw unless specified, I will write for canonverse I might get carried away with the request and either write a long-ass fic or a slightly off-topic one I can refuse any req that I'm not comfortable/interested to write about so please resprect my decision when it comes to that

latest change 31/01/24