#regularization machine learning meaning

[getreview4u]

(via All you need to know about Machine Learning | meaning, tool, technique, math, algorithm, AI, accuracy, …etc)

[marklikely]

hey what is going on in tech right now that we keep having to do this "new buzzword dominating every conversation you have" thing every year

[phantomrose96]

The conversation around AI is going to get away from us quickly because people lack the language to distinguish types of AI--and it's not their fault. Companies love to slap "AI" on anything they believe can pass for something "intelligent" a computer program is doing. And this muddies the waters when people want to talk about AI when the exact same word covers a wide umbrella and they themselves don't know how to qualify the distinctions within.

I'm a software engineer and not a data scientist, so I'm not exactly at the level of domain expert. But I work with data scientists, and I have at least rudimentary college-level knowledge of machine learning and linear algebra from my CS degree. So I want to give some quick guidance.

What is AI? And what is not AI?

So what's the difference between just a computer program, and an "AI" program? Computers can do a lot of smart things, and companies love the idea of calling anything that seems smart enough "AI", but industry-wise the question of "how smart" a program is has nothing to do with whether it is AI.

A regular, non-AI computer program is procedural, and rigidly defined. I could "program" traffic light behavior that essentially goes { if(light === green) { go(); } else { stop();} }. I've told it in simple and rigid terms what condition to check, and how to behave based on that check. (A better program would have a lot more to check for, like signs and road conditions and pedestrians in the street, and those things will still need to be spelled out.)

An AI traffic light behavior is generated by machine-learning, which simplistically is a huge cranking machine of linear algebra which you feed training data into and it "learns" from. By "learning" I mean it's developing a complex and opaque model of parameters to fit the training data (but not over-fit). In this case the training data probably includes thousands of videos of car behavior at traffic intersections. Through parameter tweaking and model adjustment, data scientists will turn this crank over and over adjusting it to create something which, in very opaque terms, has developed a model that will guess the right behavioral output for any future scenario.

A well-trained model would be fed a green light and know to go, and a red light and know to stop, and 'green but there's a kid in the road' and know to stop. A very very well-trained model can probably do this better than my program above, because it has the capacity to be more adaptive than my rigidly-defined thing if the rigidly-defined program is missing some considerations. But if the AI model makes a wrong choice, it is significantly harder to trace down why exactly it did that.

Because again, the reason it's making this decision may be very opaque. It's like engineering a very specific plinko machine which gets tweaked to be very good at taking a road input and giving the right output. But like if that plinko machine contained millions of pegs and none of them necessarily correlated to anything to do with the road. There's possibly no "if green, go, else stop" to look for. (Maybe there is, for traffic light specifically as that is intentionally very simplistic. But a model trained to recognize written numbers for example likely contains no parameters at all that you could map to ideas a human has like "look for a rigid line in the number". The parameters may be all, to humans, meaningless.)

So, that's basics. Here are some categories of things which get called AI:

"AI" which is just genuinely not AI

There's plenty of software that follows a normal, procedural program defined rigidly, with no linear algebra model training, that companies would love to brand as "AI" because it sounds cool.

Something like motion detection/tracking might be sold as artificially intelligent. But under the covers that can be done as simply as "if some range of pixels changes color by a certain amount, flag as motion"

2. AI which IS genuinely AI, but is not the kind of AI everyone is talking about right now

"AI", by which I mean machine learning using linear algebra, is very good at being fed a lot of training data, and then coming up with an ability to go and categorize real information.

The AI technology that looks at cells and determines whether they're cancer or not, that is using this technology. OCR (Optical Character Recognition) is the technology that can take an image of hand-written text and transcribe it. Again, it's using linear algebra, so yes it's AI.

Many other such examples exist, and have been around for quite a good number of years. They share the genre of technology, which is machine learning models, but these are not the Large Language Model Generative AI that is all over the media. Criticizing these would be like criticizing airplanes when you're actually mad at military drones. It's the same "makes fly in the air" technology but their impact is very different.

3. The AI we ARE talking about. "Chat-gpt" type of Generative AI which uses LLMs ("Large Language Models")

If there was one word I wish people would know in all this, it's LLM (Large Language Model). This describes the KIND of machine learning model that Chat-GPT/midjourney/stablediffusion are fueled by. They're so extremely powerfully trained on human language that they can take an input of conversational language and create a predictive output that is human coherent. (I am less certain what additional technology fuels art-creation, specifically, but considering the AI art generation has risen hand-in-hand with the advent of powerful LLM, I'm at least confident in saying it is still corely LLM).

This technology isn't exactly brand new (predictive text has been using it, but more like the mostly innocent and much less successful older sibling of some celebrity, who no one really thinks about.) But the scale and power of LLM-based AI technology is what is new with Chat-GPT.

This is the generative AI, and even better, the large language model generative AI.

(Data scientists, feel free to add on or correct anything.)

[hairmetal666]

Everyone in the league knows about Eddie Munson. He has the makings of a great pitcher, except for the fact that his slider has a 75% chance of sliding too high and his fastballs mostly end up in the dirt. His technique is wild, flailing, unrestrained. Which is why Steve is beside himself when he learns about the trade.

The owners, they think that Steve being the best catcher in the league means he can work with Eddie, settle him, make him a real prospect. Steve's input isn't needed with the decision already made, but Munson--with all his tattoos piercings and leather--looks like he'd rather hock a loogie at Steve than take directions from him.

And Steve is the best in the league, the glue that keeps the team together. They're a well-oiled machine, and Eddie is--Eddie is a squeaky wheel.

They meet for the first time, briefly, in the locker room. He's seen the guy before, of course, but now, like this, he can't help but be intrigued by his pale skin and long curls and brown doe-eyes, his lightly muscled frame. And they're in the locker room, Eddie with just a towel around his waist, exposing his toned chest and stomach and the black swirl of his tattoos.

"Steve Harrington!" Eddie reaches out a hand. "Great to meet you, man."

"You too. Excited to have you with us." The handshake is quick and firm and Steve is trying not to be surprised about how excited and genuine the guy sounds, keep his mind away from thinking of how Eddie is naked aside from the towel.

With only a few weeks until the start of the regular season, Eddie starts pitching to Steve. And Steve, he so expects Eddie to fight and grumble and refuse, that his head sort of spins when, on the first day, Eddie claps him on the back with his glove, says, "where do you want me, cap?" and that's that.

He wants to say that they dislike each other, that they're a bad fit, that Eddie is full himself and refuses constructive criticism.

Instead.

Instead it's easy.

Eddie doesn't complain, doesn't argue, just watches Steve, learns him, takes his advice and notes and implements them as much as he can. They like each other, have an easy rapport, get each other. He's tight with all the pitchers, but Eddie is different. They settle each other.

They're best friends. They hangout constantly. And he doesn't have a crush; he doesn't. It would be unprofessional. They're best friends.

But sometimes, sometimes he thinks he catches Eddie looking at him. It's impossible. Of course it's impossible. Eddie couldn't be into the guy Sports Illustrated called "baseball's Ralph Lauren model" in the intro to Steve's Body Issue photo spread. And it doesn't matter one way or the other because Steve won't make a move. He won't jeopardize the team like that.

They don't touch. He touches everyone on the team, often, and Eddie particularly is a physical guy, but aside from that first handshake, he keeps his distance. Steve's afraid--even though it's silly, he's afraid--that once they start touching, he won't be able to stop, and he can't let that happen.

The team is good, competing for first place in the National League. Eddie's success has made everyone else better.

It's late July, they're in first place in the league, and Eddie's pitching a perfect game. There's only been 24 perfect games thrown in the history of Major League Baseball, but it's the eighth inning and Eddie's doing it.

A pitch goes wild, veers high over the umpire's head. Eddie's shaken, Steve can tell with how his fist tightens compulsively around the ball. The next pitch swings wide, towards the batter's knees.

The count is at 2 balls, no strikes, and he can see, even from behind home plate Steve can see, that Eddie's losing it. He heads for the mound, refuses to let it end like this. He closes the distance between them, has a quick internal debate before he puts his hand on Eddie's lower back. They've never touched, this is it, this is--warmth bleeds from Eddie's skin, through the fabric of his jersey, goes straight to Steve's head.

Eddie frowns. "I don't think I--"

"You're going to do it, Ed. I know. I can feel it." He pats his chest, over his heart. "It's gonna happen."

Eddie's breathing settles and it's only then that Steve realizes he's rubbing circles into Eddie's back with his thumb. He's not sure when he started, doesn't want to stop, loves being able to feel.

"Okay," Eddie says.

"Okay."

Steve removes his hand, heads back to home, still tingling with the warmth of Eddie's body even as he crouches behind the plate.

He closes out the inning with three definitive strike outs. The crowd goes wild.

They take the field for the top of the 9th, the crowd is screaming, ready for this, the energy zipping through every player on the field.

It goes by in a blur. Nine pitches. Eddie's perfect game is wrapped up in nine phenomenal pitches.

As the ump calls the last out, there's a moment of complete and utter quiet in the stadium, Steve's heart a pounding hum in his ears, before pandemonium breaks loose. There's screaming, fireworks, someone is crying--

All he can see is Eddie. Eddie's who's thrown his glove to the dirt, is barreling towards him with a triumphant smile bright on his face. Steve stands, runs to close the distance. He sees the moment that Eddie decides to jump into his arms, catches him easily--will always catch him--but his legs are tired and the momentum gets him, sends them tumbling back into the grass.

They're both yelling, laughing, smiling hard enough to hurt. Eddie's hair has fallen out if its tie, tumbling around his shoulders, and Steve gazes at him, can't help it, in this moment can admit that he's so, so astronomically in love.

It's only then Steve realizes that the laughter's stopped, that Eddie's gazing back. Brown eyes shining bright with happiness, cheeks flushed pink, lips parted. Thoughtless, he reaches up to caress Eddie's cheek.

The team reaches them, streaming around them, yanking Eddie and Steve to their feet. The celebration stretches around them, the moment slipping away. He wants to finish what they started but there are interviews, champagne showers, congratulations, that keep them apart. Sometimes, from across the room, their eyes meet, and there's heat there that's new, that sparks something low in Steve's gut.

Hours pass, and finally he finds himself alone in the locker room. He's just pulled on his t-shirt when the door shuts behind him. He spins, finds Eddie, waiting, watching.

He crosses the room without a word, can't not, not now, not after everything. They grapple for a second, the wanting so strong that it takes a second to settle, to find each other. They kiss hard, desperate, seething with desire.

Steve hopes it never ends and it doesn't, just tapers into soft kisses, gentle nips. He can't bring himself to step away.

"Is this for real ?" Eddie whispers.

"I've been insane about you since the trade."

Eddie's smile is blinding. "I used to have those pictures of you--the ones with the little red shorts?--in my locker in the minors. Feel like I'm living in a dream right now."

It lights him up inside, knowing that Eddie wants him, has wanted him. "Let me take you home and show you just how real it is?"

He snorts, but his dimples deepen, eyes shining. "What a line, sweetheart."

"Yeah well, the baseball field isn't the only place where I hit home runs."

[mindfulstudyquest]

“ dopamine detox ,, and why you should delete all your social media right now

"just five more minutes" and then you end up scrolling on instagram or tiktok for hours. i know that feeling. even if you know rationally that focusing on the really important things ( such as studying, working, learning from books or whatever ) is much healthier for you and your future, you can't help it.

you know that start studying for the exam you have next week will benefit you much more in the long run, but you still prefer watching tiktoks and scrolling on instagram. you could say that is pretty obvious: one activity is easy, and doesn't require much effort, whereas the other one is difficult and implies that you are focused.

but it's actually like this? so then why some people manage to be consistent in studying, or working, or exercising? they simply just have more motivation than you? and how can you start having the same motivation as them?

to answer this question, we have to take a look to a very important molecule produced by our brain: dopamine.

dopamine is often considered a pleasure molecule, but it's a false belief. dopamine is actually the molecule that makes us desire things, and it's that desire that gives us the motivation to complete every kind of task. for example, your brain doesn't release dopamine while you're eating a cheesburger, it releases it while you're going to mcdonald's to buy it, because you anticipate that the food will make you feel good, even if it actually makes you feel worse.

to your brain, it doesn't matter if the high-dopamine-activity is damaging to you.

your brain organizes priorities based off how much dopamine is expecting to get:

if an activity releases too little dopamine, you won't have the motivation to accomplish it.

if an activity releases a lot of dopamine you'll be motivated to do it, and repeat it over and over

so, which activities releases dopamine? basically, any activity where you can get an immediate potential reward releases an high amount of dopamine. but if you know that there's not an immediate reward invoved ( such as in studying, where the reward is in the long run ) your brain will not expect to release much of it and you'll be less motivated to do that task.

nearly everything releases some amount of dopamine, even drinking water when you're thirsty, but the highest amount of it is released when you're getting a reward randomly, for example while playing on a slot machine. even if you loose money, you eventually expect to get a bigger reward.

therefore it is not so surprising that the most additive social networks ( tiktok, instagram, pinterest ) are designed as slot machines. you don't know what the next post or video will be, but you expect something great, so your brain releases a large amount of dopamine.

in today's society our brains are overloaded with stimuli that induce an unnatural production of dopamine ( scrolling on social media, playing video games, watching internet pornograhy, etc. ).

it's frightening that people don't know how harmful this lifestyle is: our bodies have a biological sistem called homeostasis, which means that our bodies keep the internal physical and chemical conditions at a balanced level, whenever an imbalance occurs, our bodies adapt to it, for example, when it's very hot our body temperature rises and we start sweating to cool down.

but homeostasis manifests through tolerance too. for example, someone who hardly ever drinks alchool will be tipsy after one beer, on the other hand, someone who drinks alchool on a regular basis will need two, three, four beers in order to get drunk, because their body has developed a tolerance to it. it's not much different with dopamine.

so if you get used to large amounts of dopamine, you won't be able to do the things that you did before, because they don't produce as much dopamine and it's more difficult to motivate yourself to do them. once your dopamine tolerance gets too high, you are no longer able to enjoy low dopamine activities.

as if you were a drug addict, there's only one way to get out of it: you have to perform a dopamine detox. you have to avoid all high dopamine activities in order to allow your body to adjust to a normal level of dopamine production and start finding motivation again in the things that improve your personal growth.

it's not easy, you will be nervous and frustrated, maybe you won't make it through a full day without social media, but day by day it will get better and better, and eventually you'll be able to appreciate small things again.

imagine that you're eating your favorite food - for example, chocolate cake - every single day. after a while, chocolate cake doesn't taste good as before, even if it's literally the same cake. on the other hand, if you eat it once a month, it will taste great, because it's not something you've gotten used to.

this is exactly what dopamine detox does. be safe guys, and start recovering now.

[ source: https://youtu.be/9QiE-M1LrZk ]

[solecist]

more context for 악어(acau)'s translation (troubles? future troubles?)!

@blockgamepirate mentioned pronouns in context of translation in a reblog and that got me thinking about a bunch of things lmao but mostly about 반말 (banmal).

악어 decided really early on into his experience with the translator to try to use banmal bc he felt like the translator was picking up on it better, and he probably thought this because of two things:

banmal is usually shorter than 존댓말 (jondaemal) which is the polite/default way of speaking. and when i say default i mean my parents sometimes use it to refer to each other. it's more than just politeness, it's also a certain amount of respect? with younger people (high school, college, maybeeee graduate student age) people tend to use banmal with friends. older people use banmal to talk to children, and children use banmal except when talking to older people. i think the easiest way of showing just how much shorter banmal is, is to use "안녕" (korean "hello") as an example. "안녕" (annyeong) is actually banmal! you absolutely wouldn't say this to someone you've just met - you would say "안녕하세요" (annyeonghaseyo) which is jondaemal. but do you see how the second is three syllables longer? there's more of a margin of error with three more syllable and that's why the machine translator doesn't work as well with jondaemal.

The most casual way of speaking banmal uses pronouns. korean doesn't have gendered pronouns really, and the pronouns it does have seem. rude? generally? children use pronouns a lot and adults use pronouns when speaking to children but otherwise.... if you're not friends (and young honestly have yet to find an midsized (40+) adult regularly use pronouns) calling someone "you" is like. an insult. it works (that is, it doesn't feel like an insult) in 악어's stream for me because it felt like he was speaking in a significantly simpler/slower register after a while? like the register you'd use for kids. but i did want to put it out there! because if you're trying to learn korean through 악어's stream, you're probably listening to him use banmal! and that's just something to be aware of.

more pronoun thoughts! in terms of gender - korean doesn't have gendered pronouns. the closest you get in third person is something like "that girl" so machine translate will almost never get it right. it will default to masculine (in my experience) or the first person ("i" "me") so that's something to keep in mind. honestly my dad often defaults to masculine third person pronouns because he forgets pronouns are gendered in english and that there's more than one of them lmaooo. korean does gender relationships A Lot (oppa is the one that most people will know - brother from female speaker to older male listener) but pronouns wise there's. no gender oop.

i just wanted to put this out there because as 악어 becomes more a part of the qsmp community, we'll probably slowly pick up on the more regular patterns of awkward machine translation from an east asian language to english, and more specifically from korean to english. and if it's confusing that's ok! assume good faith - 악어 from what i can tell isn't a streamer who'll use insults a lot or curse, and his normal way of speaking to his audience is very soothing/polite/jondaemal, so i hope that people keep watching him throughout this introduction period!

[smellslikebot]

"how do I keep my art from being scraped for AI from now on?"

if you post images online, there's no 100% guaranteed way to prevent this, and you can probably assume that there's no need to remove/edit existing content. you might contest this as a matter of data privacy and workers' rights, but you might also be looking for smaller, more immediate actions to take.

...so I made this list! I can't vouch for the effectiveness of all of these, but I wanted to compile as many options as possible so you can decide what's best for you.

Discouraging data scraping and "opting out"

robots.txt - This is a file placed in a website's home directory to "ask" web crawlers not to access certain parts of a site. If you have your own website, you can edit this yourself, or you can check which crawlers a site disallows by adding /robots.txt at the end of the URL. This article has instructions for blocking some bots that scrape data for AI.

HTML metadata - DeviantArt (i know) has proposed the "noai" and "noimageai" meta tags for opting images out of machine learning datasets, while Mojeek proposed "noml". To use all three, you'd put the following in your webpages' headers:

<meta name="robots" content="noai, noimageai, noml">

Have I Been Trained? - A tool by Spawning to search for images in the LAION-5B and LAION-400M datasets and opt your images and web domain out of future model training. Spawning claims that Stability AI and Hugging Face have agreed to respect these opt-outs. Try searching for usernames!

Kudurru - A tool by Spawning (currently a Wordpress plugin) in closed beta that purportedly blocks/redirects AI scrapers from your website. I don't know much about how this one works.

ai.txt - Similar to robots.txt. A new type of permissions file for AI training proposed by Spawning.

ArtShield Watermarker - Web-based tool to add Stable Diffusion's "invisible watermark" to images, which may cause an image to be recognized as AI-generated and excluded from data scraping and/or model training. Source available on GitHub. Doesn't seem to have updated/posted on social media since last year.

Image processing... things

these are popular now, but there seems to be some confusion regarding the goal of these tools; these aren't meant to "kill" AI art, and they won't affect existing models. they won't magically guarantee full protection, so you probably shouldn't loudly announce that you're using them to try to bait AI users into responding

Glaze - UChicago's tool to add "adversarial noise" to art to disrupt style mimicry. Devs recommend glazing pictures last. Runs on Windows and Mac (Nvidia GPU required)

WebGlaze - Free browser-based Glaze service for those who can't run Glaze locally. Request an invite by following their instructions.

Mist - Another adversarial noise tool, by Psyker Group. Runs on Windows and Linux (Nvidia GPU required) or on web with a Google Colab Notebook.

Nightshade - UChicago's tool to distort AI's recognition of features and "poison" datasets, with the goal of making it inconvenient to use images scraped without consent. The guide recommends that you do not disclose whether your art is nightshaded. Nightshade chooses a tag that's relevant to your image. You should use this word in the image's caption/alt text when you post the image online. This means the alt text will accurately describe what's in the image-- there is no reason to ever write false/mismatched alt text!!! Runs on Windows and Mac (Nvidia GPU required)

Sanative AI - Web-based "anti-AI watermark"-- maybe comparable to Glaze and Mist. I can't find much about this one except that they won a "Responsible AI Challenge" hosted by Mozilla last year.

Just Add A Regular Watermark - It doesn't take a lot of processing power to add a watermark, so why not? Try adding complexities like warping, changes in color/opacity, and blurring to make it more annoying for an AI (or human) to remove. You could even try testing your watermark against an AI watermark remover. (the privacy policy claims that they don't keep or otherwise use your images, but use your own judgment)

given that energy consumption was the focus of some AI art criticism, I'm not sure if the benefits of these GPU-intensive tools outweigh the cost, and I'd like to know more about that. in any case, I thought that people writing alt text/image descriptions more often would've been a neat side effect of Nightshade being used, so I hope to see more of that in the future, at least!

[thezombieprostitute]

Tech Tuesday: Lloyd Hansen

Summary: It's your first week on the job and you find yourself having to deal with a very angry higher up.

Warnings: Power imbalance, Yelling. Please let me know if I missed any.

Tech Tuesdays Masterlist

You were grateful for the minimal fallout from the ticket you apparently shouldn't have accepted. When you talked to Syverson the next day you learned that Mr. Hansen has a mean reputation and only more experienced IT personnel were to respond to his tickets. Thankfully there was no retaliation from Johnny either. He took the lecture from Syverson and apologized to you for putting you in that situation.

They had both given you confused looks when you assured them it hadn't been so bad. Yes, he was very loud and very angry, but it wasn't anything too bad and the anger was rarely directed at you. Really you were just grateful there wasn't any ill will from Johnny because you were a goody-two-shoes or tattletale. You'd had more than enough of that in school.

After a few days, Mr. Pine visited you. "We have an interesting note from Mr. Hansen. On his latest ticket he added a note to 'send the Maestro'. Would you know anything about that?"

"Um, well, Mr. Pine, um, when I fixed his laptop, he, um, mentioned something about me being a maestro."

His eyebrows raise in surprise, "that is quite unexpected. Not that you're so talented, but that he's so complimentary."

Not really knowing how to reply, you simply shrug your shoulders.

"This will certainly be coming up as a good thing on your performance review," Mr. Pine continues. "But I don't know that having you answer all of his tickets would be good policy. With your permission, I'll add you to the roster for dealing with Hansen, but it certainly wouldn't be fair to have you be the sole person responsible."

"That make sense, Mr. Pine. And thank you."

"Not a problem," he nods. "Looking forward to your insights on that upcoming project for the CFO."

You get back to focusing on your work until lunchtime. You've have to set alarms to remind you to eat. It's irritating to get startled out of your focus, but it really is healthier to take regular food and bathroom breaks. The exit to the break room takes you past Mr. Pine's office. There's some very loud yelling coming from there and it looks like Mr. Pine's assistant is almost in a panic.

Not wanting to get in trouble you walk faster towards the little kitchen for your lunch. Keeping an eye on the time you sit and try to enjoy your simple sandwich with a side of grapes. Not much, but it's satisfying and healthier than relying on the vending machines.

"Maestro! There you are!"

You head shoots up, eyes wide open as you recognize Mr. Hansen's voice. "Y-y-yes, Mr. Hansen? Sir? H-how can I help you?"

"Pine might decide that others answer my tickets but you're going to take all of them. Tell the other minions in your department that you'll take the tickets I create. I don't doubt they'll happily let you do so."

"Sir, Mr. Hansen, I really can't do that," you entreat. "I work for Mr. Pine and Mr. Syverson, not you. I have to follow their orders, Sir."

You see his mustache twitch in irritation, "let's see if we can fix that." You're at a loss for words as he storms out of the break room.

Tagging @alicedopey; @delicatebarness; @ellethespaceunicorn; @icefrozendeadlyqueen; @jaqui-has-a-conspiracy-theory; @late-to-the-party-81; @lokislady82 ; @peyton-warren @ronearoundblindly; @stellar-solar-flare

[peppermintquartz]

Some headcanons:

Buck hates Tommy's habit of leaving his mugs around the apartment/house. He's found mugs in the bedroom, the living room, the garage, next to the sofa, on top of the washing machine... This bad habit leads to their first fight, where Buck says something pretty cutting about Tommy not giving a shit about how he leaves messes for others to deal with

In the end Tommy has one single large mug with his name on it that he drinks out of at Buck's place, and he has to circulate the house before he sleeps to put away his mugs if Buck's staying over at his place

Tommy hates when Buck puts down one of Tommy's hobbies, even if Buck doesn't mean it at all. It feels patronizing when Buck's all "I think there are better ways to spend a weekend than see a bunch of sweaty guys in spandex pretend to fight" when Tommy asks if Buck wants to watch WrestleMania with him

Tommy ends up watching it with Eddie and happens to mention this when Eddie asks why Buck isn't there, and Eddie picks up on the underlying upset. He tells Buck that sometimes, what seems stupid to him is just Tommy's way of asking to spend time vegging out together, and that Buck should have at least given it a shot before shooting down the suggestion

They each get annoyed by the way they fold the laundry. Tommy does it army style, Buck does it Marie Kondo style, and to keep the peace they sort out the clothes into respective piles before folding them

Channel surfing. Tommy knows what he enjoys so he has just those few shows that he watches at specific times, and if there are MMA fights or NBA matches he wants to watch, he marks them out on his schedule. Buck's interested in lots of stuff and just surfs through all the channels until something catches his eye. Usually it doesn't bother Tommy much but this one occasion, Tommy's like "can't you pick something and stick with it?" And it's the critical tone that ticks Buck off, and that leads to their second fight, where Tommy snaps that Buck never seems to know what he wants

Maddie gets the brunt of Buck's rants (over the phone or in person), Eddie a close second, while Tommy works it out of his system by pummeling a heavy bag and then he calls Chimney (and later Bobby) to ask how to explain himself in a way that Buck would understand

They know exactly how they can hurt each other because they've learned a lot about each other. And they both give each other the cold shoulder after their arguments but they also can't bear not seeing each other on their days off

The good thing is, they're both mature enough and know the danger of their jobs enough not to hang on to their resentment for too long. Usually, they apologize a maximum of two shifts later

Makeup sex is fun, but they both agree that's only in small doses. Regular happy sex is better

[whatsa-bi-as]

3 months

GN!reader x Kim Seungmin

plot; Seungmin falls for a local barista not knowing that they fell first

genre; fluff

warnings; reader is described as wearing a dress and having tattoos. Heavily implies that the reader has seasonal depression

word count; 2.6k

networks; @kflixnet and @k-labels

proofread; by me

masterlist is here

There was no worse pain than the sharp winter wind. It cut across your thighs like knives and left every part of exposed skin feeling frostbitten. That’s without mentioning the rain that fell constantly; not a day would go by without drops of ice water melting into your skin and leaving your hands red.

In between the rain and the cold, it was also dark. The sun already set as you were on your way to work, forcing the streets to be lit only by fluorescent streetlights. It was an ugly scene. The cold, dark streets held no laughter despite being filled with smiling people only three months before.

Three months can be a long time but when you’re in the monotonous routine of, class, work, home, repeat, the days begin to bleed together meaning that the high of summer feels like yesterday and the darkness of winter seems never ending. 

When you were living at home three months felt like forever. It was 90 days of family dinners, laughter, and chaos. Now you’re on your own? It was 90 days of dark and quiet. 90 days of no sleep, of stressing about deadlines, of dealing with things you never thought you’d have to. It’s odd how 90 days could mean so much, feel like so much time, but now it’s just gone in what feels more like 90 seconds.

Work was not much better; being a barista was exhausting. Always having to smile, having to deal with people who barely see you as a person, it was enough to drive anyone insane, but you had to pay the bills, so here you were clocking in for your 7th shift in 8 days. You had been put on the close shift, so hopefully it would go quickly, and you’d be able to put some music on and focus on getting the tasks done. 

The tables were cleaned, chairs were stacked, and it looked like you’d be able to lock the doors as soon as the clock hit seven. That was until four boys came through the door. They looked like nice people but that wasn’t enough to stop the annoyance from rising as they had come in at 6:52 pm. Eight minutes, that was all, a tiny blip in the 129,600 minutes that had melted together over the past few months. 

One of the boys looks around and his face just drops.

“Are you closed? We are so sorry if you are!”

You look around, tempted to say yes, to get them to go so you’ll be able to leave early, but all of them look so awful about the possibility of being an inconvenience.

“You got here just in time. We close at 7.” 

It was definite that the customer service smile didn’t hide your annoyance, but it was a good enough attempt.

“Thank you! We’ll make it quick.” The taller one replied.

And they did make it quick. Ordering four drinks, paying with one card to save time, leaving as soon as they got their drinks. They were the perfect late-night customers; you couldn’t complain about the interaction at all. Did it take you a little longer to close? Well, yes, but that was mainly the coffee machine so you could just go on your phone.

After that night, those four boys became regulars, sometimes they would bring other people but there would always be at least one of them there to say hello. You didn’t really give it much thought but after a couple weeks you realised that the feeling of impending dread had lessened. The wind was still as bitter, and the cold was still cutting but the feeling you got when you saw them was like the one that the sun brought in the spring.

You had realised what they had come to mean to you, as much as almost strangers can mean to someone, because you had learnt their names. It was never really a priority for you to learn customer names, you could recognise regulars from their faces, and you would only remember other people if they were rude. This was only a job, you didn’t see any point in putting in that much extra effort, but these boys felt different.

There was Hyunjin, he’s the tall one, very nice but can be incredibly chaotic. Dances everywhere he goes to the point you think he might try and get you to do a Tik Tok with him next time they come in late.

Then there's Felix. He has these adorable freckles and the brightest damn smile you’ve ever seen. He only laughed when you tried to do an Australian accent after you heard his so he might be too nice for his own good.

Next is Han. His name is actually Jisung, but you have never heard any of the main four call him that. You only know what his name is because he came in with some other people, who were equally as nice. He is just as chaotic as Hyunjin, but Jisung is just worse at hiding it while in public.

The final one of the four was harder to pin down. He was cute, nice, and the perfect customer but he never really joined in when the other three were messing around. You knew that they were all the same age but that was about it. He was the cutest by far and you’re not afraid to admit that you had a bit of a crush on the mystery man. 

From what you’ve learnt his name is Seungmin and he’s a singer. That's about it. The other boys have called him ‘puppy’ but that's just confusing, so you let that one go. Ironically it's the one that you want to know the most that you know the least about.

The boy continued to be a mystery as winter turned to spring. Flowers bloomed and the sun shone bright, but you knew next to nothing about Seungmin. 

Your mom would say the change in seasons brought change in the times, it sounded like superstition or star signs, but it gave you hope that as the days grew longer your relationship with him would grow stronger.

That said the warmer weather did bring a warmer attitude, you were happier and that could be seen through the way you treated others with kindness no matter how they first approached the conversation. You complimented little girls in summer dresses, made small talk with other tired students, and even chose to take the high road against a few particularly difficult customers. It was a complete 180 from how you had been for the past few months, but it was a welcome change.

This made someone look at you in a different way. The boy had never really thought of you in more than a friendly way but seeing you smile, and watching as you took the everyday into your stride, well he started to reconsider your place in his life.

Seungmin was happy on his own. He never really bothered with relationships, instead he watched the ones around him. He saw how Hyunjin was able to get any girl he wanted but chose not to take things too far, how Jisung could make anyone laugh just by being himself, and how Felix could make someone's heart flutter by smiling. It made him slightly sick watching girls fawn over his best friends, but it was just part of life.

That's not to say Seungmin couldn’t get girls, if he tried to he definitely could, he just didn't want to. There was no reason for him to go on dates and try to find ‘the one’ when he had so much life left to live. 

But there was something about the way your eyes sparkled when your coworkers made you laugh, how you excitedly showed how your dress has pockets every time someone gives you a compliment; there was something comforting in how happiness just seemed to pour from every part of you. 

He remembered when you had first met, that late night where the boys had spent far too long practising for a competition, desperately needing coffee. You had looked so done, ready to curl up into a ball and sleep for eternity, but you still let them order even though you closed in eight minutes. It was that night Seungmin knew that you were a good person, but he was not prepared for the way you would make him feel just a few months later.

Smiling when he saw that you were, laughing at the jokes you made, wishing he could talk to you more, he knew what this all meant. In spite of him being fine alone, Seungmin wanted to be with you. He wanted to hear you sing from the kitchen on a Saturday morning, he wanted to see you in his clothes, he just wanted to be yours and for you to be his.

It had been three months since the sun began to shine again. There were still days where the wind cut into your soul, but it was healed by the bright blue of the sky. The rain fell but it was a welcome coolness against the heat that beat down; the days had gotten brighter and longer, and you could feel the darkness leaving. You were living in light, and it made you shine even brighter than the sun.

You had grown closer to the boys you would now class as friends. You found out that they were all dancers, that Felix was bilingual and was teaching the others, and that Seungmin was single. That last piece of information was the most interesting and your reaction brought out some teasing from Jisung and Hyunjin.

“Someone’s gone shy. Does someone have a thing for little Seungmin?” 

Of course it was Jisung who had to bring it up first.

Trying to keep your cool and not make a complete idiot out of yourself at work you keep your hands busy making their drinks before you reply.

“And what if I do? Would it really be that bad?”

The boys were slightly stunned, not really expecting you to admit to having feelings for their friend. For two very chatty people they were left speechless; do they try to set you two up? Or is that just meddling? Do they push him to make a move? Or would that just drive him away? There was so much that they could do but they weren’t sure that any of it would be a good move to actually get you guys together.

“No. I think you guys would be a good couple. You’d balance out his grumpy pretty nicely.” 

“Seungmin’s not grumpy he’s just an introvert Jisung, not everyone can be friendly all the time.”

By this point you had finished their drinks and knew that this conversation was coming to a close.

“I think I know you guys pretty well by now and that if you’ve decided to meddle then there's not much I can do about that. Just, don’t make me look like an idiot, whatever you guys decide to do.”

The boys took their drinks and shared a look,

“Don’t worry no matter what we do we’ll look like idiots. Well, Jisung will at least.”

“I would be offended but that’s just true. I can’t really disagree with that.”

After that day Seungmin seemed to always be with them and even introduced you to the other members of his dance team. Chan, Minho and Changbin were so sweet you didn’t know how they dealt with the younger four that you had met before. When you met Jeongin you began to see why. It’s as if the younger five took all of the chaotic energy that eight boys would create. It was a weird dynamic but seeing the difference in the way they acted made you laugh every time more than one of them came in.

They were all so nice, and cute, but it was Seungmin who had your full attention every time he came to the shop. When you heard the door open and saw his face you knew that your shift was going to be a good one because he was there, even if it was just for fifteen minutes.

It was when summer reached its peak that you began to get closer. You would talk about whatever came to your mind; he asked you about your tattoos and you’d ask about why he chose that hair colour. It was a nice routine that you had made.

That was until one hot June day he went quiet and very shyly asked.

“So… are you dating anyone?”

You guys had never really talked about relationships, it was just not something that had come up over your friendship.

“Oh um, no. I’ve had a thing for someone for a while, but I don’t really know what to do about it.”

“Does this person know that you like them?”

It was odd to hear that from the boy you liked but you weren’t sure if you should give anything away, so you tried to stay calm

“Well, some of his friends know but I don’t think they’ve told him anything. At least I hope they haven’t.”

He stayed quiet for a while; it looked like he was taking a moment to think things over. It was a nerve wracking 30 seconds.

“Why don’t you tell him? What's the worst that could happen?”

“You really think I should tell him I like him?”

He smiled at you, and you felt your heart skip a beat. His smile was the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen.

“I think you never know what could happen. Take a chance and see what comes.”

Looking in his eyes you could tell he wasn’t lying. He just wanted you to take a chance, to see what would happen if you threw caution to the wind.

“Alright then. I like you. Like a lot. I have pretty much since you came in that night.”

All he did was smile. He stayed quiet but there was no pity or sympathy in his eyes, he looked happy. After a minute he got up, still smiling, and asked for your number.

“Why?”

“So that we can organise a time to go out. On a date.”

“Oh, okay then yeah!”

After that day you and Seungmin’s relationship flourished.

You officially began dating in September, just as the leaves turned orange and the wind began to chill. So as autumn turned to winter you didn’t feel the cold the same way you did the first time you met your now boyfriend.

The wind was still sharp, the rain still cold, but when you went home you knew that Seungmin would be waiting for you. The boy could make the coldest weather warmer, his hands warmed yours and his hoodies kept you comfortable wherever you went. The boy you had met in the darkest three months you had ever experienced was able to change your life. 

The next time it felt like there was no hope he was there to remind you that there is. He made your flat feel like home, and the days that were once silent were loud with laughter and music. He warmed your soul in the coldest time of the year. 

You never thought that a barista job would mean you’d meet your soulmate but it’s odd how life can change in just a short amount of time. Three months can feel like forever, but with Seungmin by your side three months disappears in a blink of an eye.

[hedgiwithapen]

we provide... beverage

(coffee shop au!) "Hardison." Eliot says, measured and even. " What's the rule?"

"Look," Hardison responds, holding out the drink placatingly. "Just try it. it's gonna be the perfect winter drink, I'm telling you--"

"We spent a fortune on these espresso machines, do not! Use the steamer! On your damn! Orange! Soda!" 

Hardison wilts. "It's good, though! Orange with cloves is a perfect winter flavor combination, it's traditional, it's--"

"It's carbonated!" Eliot says. "No. Do not add it to the menu. I swear to god, Hardison, do not--"

"Please?"

Eliot stands very firm. "No. We agreed. Parker handles the money, I make the coffee, and you-- you make sure the equipment doesn't break, and that means both wear and tear AND you putting Orange soda through the-- I can't believe I'm even having to say this. Why am I having to say this? did you learn nothing from the Gummy frog mochas?"

"Oh, are you bringing those back?" A customer asks from the other side of the counter. The guy smiles sheepishly. " Sorry, don't mind me, I can wait. I just.. those were actually really good, can I...?" he trails off, looking between Hardison's pure elation, and the look of absolute murder on Eliot's face. "Right, no, uh... one.......regular mocha?"

Eliot goes to make the drink. Parker slips behind the man, borrowing his wallet long enough to learn his house is about to be foreclosed on. Medical bills for a sick aunt climbing higher. 

Well, they'll fix that. One mocha, and a mortgage, coming right up.

[qqueenofhades]

https://www.tumblr.com/qqueenofhades/751102464296665088

*Puts on old man costume*

"Back in my day, we used to cheat and procrastinate like real people! With copious amounts of bullshitting and pulling things out of our asses at the last minute! Secretly sneaking in little things written on our hands or in our phones fer tests and shit! Heck, maybe we didn't even NEED to cheat because it turns out we actually knew stuff, we just didn't know we knew stuff until our last minute papers got a good grade anyways because our shit actually had some analytical relevance borne from deep in our psyche, but we just didn't realize it because we had massive cases of imposter syndrome where we thought everyone else was smarter than us, while overlooking our own abilities!

Now these newfangled ChatGPTs are just taking the easy way out of the easy way out! What's up with that!? These new procrastinators and cheaters make us look even worse than we already do, cuz they ain't even doing the work of not doing the work! And y'all can't even say that you can learn from it in the art of bullshittin', cuz that's not even YOUR bullshitting, it's someone else's bullshitting mangled up with hundreds of other peoples' bullshittin'!

Feh, kids these days!"

*Takes off old man costume*

Addendum: old man anon griping about cheating with ChatGPT does not endorse cheating or procrastinating. I'm just being silly.

I mean... at least with regular old-fashioned cheating, also an academic tradition since time immemorial, at least you're engaging with the material somehow. You are putting your own two god-given eyeballs on that and using your own ickle brainikins to do SOMETHING with it, even if that something is morally questionable. We've all seen the elaborate cheat devices where someone managed to engrave all the exam answers onto a pen or a pair of socks or whatever -- at least that person went in and used their initiative to remember information SOMEHOW, and to do it under their own power. Now, yes, it will get you into trouble, and yes, there are plenty of conversations to be had about accessibility and the fact that not everyone learns by sitting in a room and being lectured at and then having to regurgitate it all from memory with no notes in a final exam, which is why there is a whole thriving field of educational pedagogy and best practices and how to accommodate students with different learning styles and etc. etc. I sometimes see AI framed as "uwu accessibility issue :(" and like... cmon. There are educational professionals who spend their whole lives and careers working out how to shake up the traditional learning format and present material in an engaging way and teach students how to think and write and otherwise be academic and rigorous. And like, if you're voluntarily in this space, then we presume you WANT that instruction! Not to just sit around and whine about how we aren't catering enough to you personally and this means you should get to use the Bullshit Plagiarism Nonsense Machine to never ever think at all!

Now, I will say that the naivete around AI is not only limited to students. I was in a department meeting yesterday where the literal associate dean of the college seemed startled to discover that AI might not be a) totally reliable b) able to totally replace lesson planning and evaluation/grading by an actual human professor (after several faculty members pushed back, shall we say, briskly on the idea that it could). Plenty of people still think it can just magically solve Academia (or /insert field here), and those are not just limited to clueless undergraduates. And yes, undergraduates are clueless in different ways and for different reasons in every era of the world; it is likewise an academic rite of passage. But I still cannot for the life of me understand why you, in ye olde benighted 21st century, would pay tens of thousands of dollars and/or accrue it in debt to go to college, to learn nothing, to whine and blame your professors for "not designing assignments well" (when again, every remotely decent educational professional agonizes for eons about how to do a good job of this for all kinds of students), to insist it is your entitled right to use the Bullshit Plagiarism Nonsense Machine, and then presumably be /shocked pikachu face/ when you don't learn anything and spend your time posting idiot takes on the internet. I mean. The state of critical thinking is /waves hand/ Already So Bad, and the AI craze plays directly into that by fulfilling the insidious fantasy that the hard things in life aren't actually hard and don't have to be learned by patient and careful practice. And that is just. Yeah. C'mon.

(I realize this was a funny/lighthearted ask, but yeah, we can consider this one old man turning to another old man on the park bench and making a joke, and the other old man bellowing YOUTH THESE DAYS!!! and scaring all the pigeons and/or passersby. Ahem.)

[dystychiphxbia]

☆ - Gym crush! pt. 3

this sucked but im so busy with uni aaa

gn!reader

characters: isagi, reo, nagi

Isagi Yoichi:

this guy is new to the gym

he catches your eye, mainly because his form is horrifying at first

where did bro learn how to squat...

you try your best to help him!!

and wow he learns super fast

like...when one is new to the gym they usually progress fast but he's on another level...

you are honestly impressed

and he's so nice too??

except when he has progressed enough to attempt a pr...yeah it's the same level of focusment as when he's playing football

and he can get angry at you for bothering him

but he will always apologize afterwards and say that he just really needed to focus

he really enjoys your company...he was a blushing mess when you first approached him and he still struggles to keep his composure when your hands accidentally touch

always spots for you but first you have to teach him how to do it

definitely talks about you to his friends

they try to get him to ask you out but he always says that you are just his gym crush, no way you return his feelings (but you do)

and your thighs...he WILL be looking at them.

Mikage Reo;

now let's be real...this guy has his own personal gym for sure

but let's say one of his friends drag him to a regular gym....for plot reasons

rich boy is shocked

but you catch his attention...you are so elegant...you dont fit in with all the gym bros

now the problem is he wants to talk to you...would it be weird? can he just invite you to his gym instead?

he overthinks too much

you notice him too, he looks out of place and his gym etiquette is lacking

he forgets to rerack his weights and you immediately go remind him

"oh...im used to not having to rerack them at my own private gym...thanks for the heads up."

nah not the entitled rich boy

but you are a bit jealous...especially when you are waiting for the leg press to be free

reo hates working out in a packed gym but he just cant get you out of his mind even couple days later

his friend says you come often during the peak times and always seem pissed off about having to wait between machines...

so, he returns to the gym once more with a plan

and there you are....waiting for a free squat rack

you were quite surprised to see him...why would a rich boy with his own gym return to a regular gym during peak hours?

once you start racking your weights, reo comes up to you asking how many sets you have left

"bro. i just started. you saw me." "well lemme squeeze in between ur sets yeah?"

you dont like sharing. but the gym is packed. so you give in.

reo keeps talking to you and you realize that he's actually nice

sure he's rich and entitled and has no clue about how the life of a poor commoner is, but you enjoy talking with him

and the way he throws in a few flirts, and makes sure to compliment you...you are a goner

you end up doing your entire routine with him, getting to know him more

you can't help but notice the way he looks at you...and your body

by the end of the workout, he drops the big question

"wanna ditch this gym and workout at mine?"

he promises you can workout for free...ofc you say yes cause that means you can save money

so you save money and he gets to see you almost everyday...an ideal situation!

honestly in the end you care more about seeing reo than saving money...

Nagi Seishiro;

nah who got this man to the gym

again...let's say a friend forced him to come along...for plot reasons...

he does not want to be there

like yes he has his goals that he wants to achieve, but a packed gym is just too much

you see him occupying a machine you need for like 10 mins just being on his phone so you go up to him

he's confused but lets you have the machine, he wasn't really using it anyway

honestly he seems kinda lost

like he doesnt actually know what to do. since he was already dragged to the gym, he should do something useful but he doesn't know what

and you notice...and kinda feel bad for him...he looks like a lost puppy

so!! you help him out!!

you dont know much about football but you help him figure out what he should do at the gym to improve :)

he actually appreciates your help. and you see him come to the gym more and more

this is nagi we are talking about so it's a miracle that he actually keeps coming back

but the thing is that he really wants to see you!! you motivate him

you always smile so brightly when you see him. he just can't get enough of that smile.

everything is less of a hassle with you around!

[cranberrv]

Hey boo, I was wondering if u could do hcs or a short story of Darry dating a girl that sings at a bar/diner and going there with the gang, and she sings and maybe works the counter? Or just Darry hcs or a story in general.

be my baby

˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ in which darry watches you sing (not proofread)

- the dingo was getting boring, so the gang decided to try out a local diner on the west-side

- darry was against it, there was a huge chance someone could get jumped and he didn’twant to deal with that

- but all that worry went away when he saw you

- you were on a small stage in the diner, singing “be my baby” by the ronnettes. the gang had conveniently come during a live music show

- the entire lunch, they all got weird looks, being greasers in a soc diner, but darry didn’t even care

- he never took himself as a “love at first sight” kind of guy, but there was just something about you..

- caring eyes and a calm aura was all he needed, and you had it

- maybe you recognized him from when he was friends with socs, because you gave him a small wave as you sung

- or maybe you were flirting.

- either way, he found himself unable to look away, like there was an invisible string connecting you two

- “ooohh, darry is down bad!” the gang teased when they noticed him

- “oh shut it, boys” he responded, adjusting himself to finally look away from you

- after you finished singing, you went back to your regular job working at the counter as another person began in the background

- they all finished eating and went to pay at the counter, where you were

- the boys shoved darry to the front to pay, and he glared, but did so

- “cash our credit?” you ask him

- “credit is fine,” he answers, scrambling for his wallet before tapping on the machine “um, you were really good, by the way” he adds

- you thank him and smile “do you like the ronnettes?” you ask him

- “they’re not bad.” he answers

- “i’ll tell you what,” you start. “i’ve got two tickets to the ronnettes for next month, and i’ve been looking for someone to go with. and i know who you are, you used to be friends with paul. you’re sweet. so do you want to come with me?”

- he’s not shocked you know him, a lot of people do. “i mean, i’ve got two kid-brothers i gotta look after…” he hesitates.

- sodapop groans. ”just go for it, darry!” he pats his back and turns to you. “he wants you bad, man, don’t start pitying him.”

- you smile at sodapop a bit then turn to darry. “it’s really fine if not, you’ve gotta take care of your family, i get it”

- oh my god, you’re patient too????? you’re perfect

- he’s silent, and ponyboy and sodapop are still insisting to darry that they’ll be fine without him for a night

- you speak again, “how about this: we don’t go to the concert, i’ll take a friend or somethin’, and we can hang out some other time. i think you’re cute, i don’t care what we do as long as we do something”

- gosh, you were confident. “yeah, alright, that sounds good.”

- he was tough to crack, a constant barrier is around him so he can protect himself in order to protect his brothers, and it may take a while to break

- but my god he is exciting to hang out with you!

- sodapop spends the next few days telling him how to treat a girl, and darry has just learned to tune him out

- long story short, you two spend some time at the park, just talking and bonding

- …and then you go out again

- and again

- and again

- and then he starts visiting you at the diner, especially on tuesdays, when it’s open-mic night

- he loves how you treat his brothers. you and sodapop bond over the fact that the ronnettes is both of your favourite band, and you’re so patient and kind and help him out with taking care of them

- darry loves his cute diner girlfriend!

[garfunklefield]

Irony

Barista!Yuji Itadori/Megumi Fushiguro Warnings: college au, coffee shop au, fluff, humor, tall yuji, short megumi, ambiguous ending Word count: 2782 DESC: It's not gay to write sweet little notes on a cute emo boy's coffee cup every day, right? RIGHT???

I wrote this in one sitting because I'm DERANGED

Every single day he’d come in here and order the same thing. A black coffee then leave.

Yuji was freshly out of college,  trying his hardest to make ends meet in the only way he knew how, making coffee. It was a weird skill he had picked up from his grandfather, doing a majority of the cooking and cleaning. He cleaned up after him, watered plants, and made him coffee. From a young age, he learned how to make exotic drinks without even batting an eye. When he found an ad for a barista position at a local coffee shop, he didn’t think twice about it. It interested him slightly, although his actual major had nothing to do with making drinks. He needed a way to pay rent that didn’t physically bore him, so he didn’t mind waking up early to open or staying late to close. Hell- even working every single day! All for one reason. 

“Hey, idiot!” A hand waved in front of his face as he was busy cleaning off the counter. He glanced to the side and saw Nobara Kugisaki, his coworker impatiently glaring his way, “We have a customer!” 

Itadori went to speak but pressed his lips into a thin line. He knew better than to argue with her this early in the morning, especially over something she could easily solve. But, he liked Nobara. Even if she was pushy and loud, she could have a sweeter side to her that no one else got to see. I mean, he never even saw it. Yet, he knew it was there waiting to be uncovered. 

He set down the cloth and shimmied over to the cash register, “Hey how can I help you?” He spoke, pressing a few buttons to get the machine ready. The boy hadn’t looked up yet to see who he was going to be dealing with, he really hoped it wasn’t any of the annoying regulars. Having regulars was fine! Aside from the ones who’d sit and talk for hours on end, trying to show you their vacation photos or lame pictures of their kids!

The man before him cleared his throat, “A black coffee, please?” That voice was unfamiliar, but instantly rang as safe to Yuji. He looked up and saw something perfect before him. Black locks of spikey hair jutted out in a few directions, all neatly pushed behind the boy's ears. Dark blue eyes, examining him through heavy rows of eyelashes. And lips, that were unwavering. Not even a polite smile, just a line. Yuji had never seen someone so beautiful before, it nearly took away his breath! I mean, guys can appreciate other men's beauty, right? So he tried not to find the fact he was turned to stone weird. 

“Um, hello?” He narrowed his eyes, eyebrows furrowing down as well. 

The barista’s eyes widened and he smiled sheepishly, snapping himself out of his haze, “Sorry! Black coffee. Can I have a name for the order?” It was customary to ask for a name for every order, but now it felt so … intimate. The man’s eyes were boring deep into Yuji’s soul and making him really regret not shaving his day-old stubble this morning. 

“Tch,” he looked off to the side, a sudden wave of annoyance flooding his features, “Megumi.” 

Megumi… 

Megumi. 

Megumi. 

The pink-haired man had never heard that name before, but he was trying his hardest to have it ingrained in his memory. Like a good barista would! There was no reason why he wanted to remember it for later! Not like he was going to google his customer- what? 

“Alright, Megumi,” he grinned, “Here or to go?” He pressed a few buttons on the cash register and it made a ding, signaling it was ready for payment. 

Megumi put his card down on the reader and thought for a moment, taking in the scenery of the small coffee shop, “To go.” Oh. Yuji really hoped he’d stay. With that, he made the simple order and handed it off. Not without doing a small doodle on the side of the white cup. It was just a little cat along with the words “Have a nice gay Megs!” Maybe it overstepped, and maybe it was weird, but he’d never know unless he did it. 

~~~

Yuji wouldn’t consider himself weird, or perverted, or a stalker. So he found it strange he sat in front of his laptop after closing the shop, googling the name Megumi. First, it was a general search to see what the name even meant. His brows raised when he saw “Blessing; Grace” as the meaning behind it. Then he went on his least favorite social media site, Instagram. He hardly used it because everyone from his college still followed him. It would’ve been a pain to start a new account and even more of a headache to delete everyone he disliked. So instead, he opted to hardly use it. The last post he made was almost three years ago, showing off his graduation gown with some cheesy quote. 

He clicked on the search bar with his thumb and typed out the name, waiting for the result to pop up. If they had any friends in common, which he doubted- I mean Toyko is a big area -he’d pop up. If not… he wasn’t sure if Megumi was even a common name to begin with, so maybe he could find the boy. The first result was a forty-year-old woman on a different side of the country than them, although she was pretty. 

Kind of like Jenni- NO! Back on topic!

The next was an art account, featuring a lot of hyperrealism. But, no face attached. He continued to scroll past the many Megumi’s who weren’t his Megumi, although it was purely for a curious and platonic reason, but found nothing. He decided to move to Facebook. Yuji wasn’t sure why he was so hellbent on finding this guy. It wasn’t like he was ever going to see him again. He worked in a small coffee shop in the heart of a large shopping center; Tourists came in all the time, along with people from different areas of the country. There was a chance he’d never see this guy again. He could have just been a pretty face in a sea of people who he drew a funny face for. 

Facebook was a dud, and with that, he closed his laptop in defeat. Maybe he really wouldn’t find this guy after all.

~~~

Yuji didn’t have high hopes for the next day. He never expected to see that face again, so he tried his hardest to burn it in his memory for as long as he could. Nobara must have seen him pouting, since she wasn’t as hard on him as she typically was. She gave him a silent yet supportive nudge on the shoulder and motioned to the door as it swung open. He sighed and rolled his shoulders, standing up to his true height. It was odd to have a customer this early, as soon as they opened. But he didn’t think much of it. Sometimes it would happen, someone being up at 7 AM and dying for a cup of coffee. It didn’t matter to him.

The boy walked up to the cash register and tapped a few buttons, looking up as he spoke, “Welcome, what can I get… for.. you…?” His voice trailed off when he saw Megumi staring back at him. His face was the same, stoic and cold, although his eyes were betraying his cool demeanor. They were wide, flickering from each of Yuji’s features until they landed back on his eyes. 

There were so many things Yuji wanted to ask him, so many things that could come off as creepy and stalkerish. So many things he decided to lock in a vault and never utter. Instead, he smiled and cleared his throat, “Hi Megumi, welcome back!” 

Megumi blinked a few times, “You… remember me?” One of his eyebrows quirked up in a bit of confusion. Although, his face didn’t really convey emotions, it was his eyes that showed he was shocked. It was his eyes that showed anxiety and confusion. Did he not expect to see Yuji when he worked every single day? Well, it wasn’t like he knew that.

“Well, yeah!” Yuji smiled, closing his eyes effortlessly, “I drew you a cat yesterday.” 

“You… did,” he slowly nodded his head as he spoke, “Um. A black coffee please?” 

“A guy who knows what he likes,” Why did I say that? “Coming up!” Stop talking! Now! Forever! 

Yuji let the boy pay and began to make his drink, “For here or to go?” He already knew the answer. Megumi replied to go, as he did the day before. It made the barista a bit sad, he wasn’t sure why. Most customers didn’t have time to sit and sip coffee, so why would he be any different? It wasn’t like there was another reason he wanted him to stay. It wasn’t like he wanted to talk to him, pick his brain, make him smile. 

He finished the drink and grabbed his marker, doodling a little flower and handing it off to him. The boy took the cup and glanced down at the cup, an irritated look crossing his features. He didn’t look at all pleased to see the drawing, but he said nothing to protest it. Without saying goodbye, he pushed the door open and left silently. 

“Okay, what gives?” Nobara’s small head appeared in Yuji’s peripheral vision and made him turn his head, then drastically look down to see her frowning dramatically, “You totally have a crush on that guy.”

“I do not!” He instantly retorted, crossing his arms over his uniformed chest, “I was just surprised to see him back here again.” 

“Uh huh, sure! Oh hiiii Megumi!” She mocked, grasping her hands together and pressing them into her cheek dit-zily, “Gee, you’re a short emo guy who knows what he likesss!” 

He frowned, “Back off. I didn’t say it like th- Stop batting your eyelashes! I don’t do that!” 

“You so did!” She laughed, moving her hand to point at him, “You’re into gay emos! He probably listens to MCR and wishes he could kiss Gerard Way!” 

Yuji blinked a few times, “Gerard… Okay stop making up weird names, Gerard isn’t a real name,” he gave her a knowing look, “That’s just like onomatopoeia. Not real.” 

Nobara went to insult him but he waved a hand in the air, “Listen, I’m all for gay L gay B, you know, but I’m not gay. I just think he’s pretty. A man can appreciate another man’s eyelashes without it being weird!” 

“...You looked at his eyelashes?” She pressed her lips together, cheeks turning a bit pink as she held back some serious laughter, “No-no. Noticing how long a guy's eyelashes isn’t gay, Yuji. You’re so right.” A little giggle escaped. 

“Thank you!” He smiled, totally misreading how that conversation went.

~~~

Megumi was still coming into the coffee shop, but he always looked so displeased when the barista would draw silly things on his cup. A look of uncomfortable annoyance always crossed his face whenever he’d pick it up and read the note. It was always along the lines of “Have a nice day Megs!” or “Good luck today!” Nothing ever personal or weird was written on there, nothing to make him uncomfortable. So, why did he look so constipated when he’d read it?

Yuji decided a week or so later that he’d not write anything on there, see what would happen. See if maybe instead of an uncomfortable look, he’d get a smile. It was useless to hope a man who looked like he hated fun and rainbows would ever smile for a barista he saw every day. Did I mention that? Yeah no, Megumi continued to come in every day when the shop opened, would get his cup, look like he wanted to die, then leave. Every day. Every day. 

The day Megumi came in, the barista was opening by himself. He stood by the back wall behind the counter, wiping down the dry-erase board calendar to put on the new dates. A new month had passed and he got tasked with drawing on something new to signify it. February was hearts and June was rainbows. As it neared October, he thought a pumpkin would be fitting. It was shitty, as all his drawings were, but that’s what made it charming. That’s why this whole coffee shop was charming, it had a level of shittiness no corporation could give you. 

He didn’t realize the raven-haired boy was standing behind him, patiently and quietly watching as he hummed to himself. It wasn’t even a good song, just something he had heard on the radio on his way to the shop. It was stuck in Yuji’s head and he decided to make the most of it. He caught himself humming louder, singing some words gently before turning on his heel and promptly freezing. 

“Oh.” Was all he could muster out as Megumi just stared at him. There wasn’t a smile or an ounce of amusement on his features. He looked bored, with a weird look in his eye. Something he hadn’t seen before, and something he couldn’t dissect. 

“Oh?” He tilted his head to the side. Okay, maybe he did find this amusing. And maybe he was good at hiding it. 

“Sorry,” Yuji responded sheepishly, walking to the counter and pressing the buttons on the cash register, “Black coffee?”

He nodded, “Yes, thank you.” 

Itadori didn’t want to make his embarrassment worsen by saying something stupid, so he opted to keep quiet as he made the drink. He already knew his customer's answer, so he chose the to-go cup. And instead of writing anything on it, he handed it with a polite smile. He wasn’t expecting Megumi to pick up the cup and turn it to its usual spot, for him to look suddenly so … hollow. Almost dejected. 

His eyes searched the white for a few moments before he turned his head to the side to look at the barista who made it, “Um… you…” 

Yuji looked back at him and raised an eyebrow, “Something wrong?”

“Are you …” he paused, “Okay?” 

Now he was really puzzled, “I’m fine. Are you okay?” 

Megumi’s face morphed into a small frown, “I’m fine, yes, but are you okay? You didn’t do the, um,” he looked down at the cup and motioned to Yuji with it. He looked almost… distressed? “The um, cup thing.”

The barista blinked once. Then again. Then several times. Oh. He had definitely misread his customer's facial expression. Was his irritated, kind of constipated look, really just how he was? It was hard for him to grasp that someone could make faces they didn’t mean, portraying a whole other emotion than what they felt. However, in that moment he figured Megumi was wearing his heart on his sleeve and showing his true emotions, unintentionally.

Yuji extended his hand, “I thought you didn’t like it. You always made, uh, like, a face when I did. So I stopped,” the other boy placed the cup in his hand and he pulled it back cheerfully. He found the marker and began to write, looking up, “I didn’t realize you actually liked it.”

His words were supposed to be cheerful, so he tried to imagine Megumi smiling at that. Instead, he looked away and frowned tightly. A light blush formed on the apples of his cheeks and spread to his nose, making him appear like an angel. A very pink angel. 

“Not liked, but… used to,” he glanced back at Yuji, and when they made eye contact for a split second, he looked away, “I don’t think I make a face.” 

“You’re making it right now,” he looked down at the cup and kept writing, trying to hide it from his customer. 

The boy cleared his throat and adjusted his posture, taking one hand to cover his upper lip, “No, I’m not,” he grunted out, through apparent gritted teeth. 

Yuji smiled, handing him the cup after a few minutes of scrawling, “It’s okay. I thought it was cu- funny.” A narrow save. A very narrow save. He pressed his lips together before making a small popping sound with them, “Have a good day.”

Megumi went to speak but he took the cup, looking over the mounds of writing. The side of his lip twitched as he brought his other hand down. And there he could’ve sworn he saw it. The hints of a smile. 

[gallusrostromegalus]

Something that you might have discussed that I just missed for AEIWAM - if Hell is basically Soul Rehab for souls that aren't Contributing Properly, then why does having high spiritual energy mean that you're more likely to go to Hell? Are they basically bleeding off excess energy from those souls, or?

Yes and no?

1. Hell is rehab for Souls that would damage the cycle of reincarnation*specifically*. People only go to hell for two* reasons: they do a lot of harm to others (aka Bad Karma), or when reincarnating them would throw the balance between worlds off (High power)

Basically, there needs to be... Approximately the same amount of spiritual energy in the living world, spirit world and Hell. So when an exceptionally powerful spirit like say, a Captain, dies and moves onto the next plane, there sort of needs to be 'room' for the incoming powerful soul. There usually isn't, and also the Life Machine that generates reality needs to eat, so Hell solves both problems by having really powerful souls come to hell and vent power for a while until they are only about as strong as a regular soul, and then send them back to the living world.

2. So, yes, the more powerful a soul, the more likely they are to go to Hell, no matter how they behave in the living or spirit world.

For people on the level of Gotei-13 captains, it's pretty much guaranteed, unless they manage to do something bizarre like drain all of their spiritual energy into a magical barrier or leave it stored in the Family Cursed Artifact (looking at you, Tsunyashiro clan). Lieutenants stand an estimated 50/50 chance (unless they learn Bankai in which case, again, guaranteed), and all seated officers are at some increased risk.

3. How they behave while alive still makes a difference though.

See, Hell in AEIWAM isn't *necessarily" The Bad Place. Souls cause harm to other souls for TONS of reasons that aren't evil: mental illness, getting caught in terrible circumstances, genuinely trying to make the world a better place and severely fucking up, and sometimes it's just bad luck. Hell isn't there to punish, it's there to figure out what went wrong that this soul hurt so many people, and try to fix it.

Sometimes that's things like "magically removing the ego and putting a different sized one in", sometimes it's "cognitive behavioral therapy" sometimes it's "you're not a bad person but you did fuck up so you gotta do a really boring and gross task that helps restore the ambient vibes of the universe for 400 years to balance out the damage" sometimes it's "actually, we can trust you to do good deeds, here's a visa to the living world to dole out minor miracles to anyone who needs it".

In AEIWAM, the only difference between a devil and an angel is that the angel does field work and the devil does back office.

So sure, all the captains are going to Hell at some point. But if they did their best while alive, they more or less get to skip rehab and have Free Time until they're weak enough to leave. It fun, actually! Captains and the like get assigned a Demonic Personal Assistant and told to go have fun, don't break anything, and are turned lose to go adventuring, get married, take up farming and/or stamp collecting or whatever they desire.

*note from above: there is a third "legitimate" way to enter Hell: Superlative Karma.

It's RARE, but once in a while a soul so vastly improves life for everyone else they end up with such extremely good karma that they run the risk of unbalancing the planes just by sheer vibes clash. Superlatives are plucked out of the cycle of reincarnation by Hell to help the spend some of that karma having a very literal HELL OF A GOOD TIME.

4. And so, all the planes of the wheel lived in harmony, UNTIL THE BOURGEOISIE ATTACKED.

Problem is, about... 1500ish years ago, a bunch of the noble houses got together, tricked The Monk Who Speaks The Name into letting them into the house of the guy that maintains The Life Machine, they very literally butchered The Divine Tech Support, and used parts of his body to jam up the wheel of life, because they thought they could be God better than God.

Dumbasses.

One of the things they jammed was the Exit from Hell, so now only a few people can leave at a time and the backup is threatening to unbalance the entire wheel now, so Hell is also being VERY VERY CAREFUL to not let any of the Captains die until they've gotten enough souls out that there is effectively 'room' for the Captain.

So yes. Higher spiritual power means a soul is guaranteed to go to Hell, at least for a while-but it also means they won't be going there for a long, LONG time.