#regardless he could have potentially ruined a ton of food and i could have just turned the fire off instead of getting the food prepped
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
weyrleaders · 2 years ago
Text
uuuuggghh it’s getting close to 4 am and im still up because of my bullshit asshole coworkerrrr
1 note · View note
thefanficmonster · 3 years ago
Text
Infatuation
Corpse Husband x Reader (Female)
Warnings: Swearing
Genre: FLUFF, RPF (Real Person Fic)
Summary: It’s not a secret that Corpse prefers taking care of his hair himself rather than going to a hair salon to get it trimmed and/or tampered. However, he only has so much knowledge of how to properly do it without having to obliterate his budget. Luckily, his girlfriend comes to his rescue.
Requested by Anon. Hi lovely! Thank you so much for the incredibly fluffy request! I’ve been very pumped to write it and now here it finally is - so sorry it’s taken me so long to complete and post it but I still hope you come across it and give it a read! Love, Vy ❤
“Um, what are you doing?“
I just walked into Corpse’s apartment to find him barricaded in the bathroom, giving himself a hair appointment. We were supposed to have a chill night in watching movies, but it seems to me like those plans will either have to be delayed or canceled, given the chaotic state both Corpse and his bathroom are in. I mean, how dumb was I to expect he was actually doing his hair justice when he told me he styled it himself? Why didn’t that immediately raise an army of red flags in my head and lead me to question his methods?
I’m honestly quite jealous of Corpse’s hair. It’s always so soft and silky and no matter how much or how little effort he’s put in it, it always looks good: either evidently carefully styled or boyishly messy, it leaves me with heart-eyes regardless. But to see him massacre it like this, it makes me wish I could report it as a crime.
“Ain’t obvious?“ He sounds rather frustrated and I feel at least slightly better due to this fact. He deserves to be as frustrated as I am by the sight of the crap he’s doing. “Sorry, you’re gonna have to wait for me for...a little while. I just need to get this under control and, um, clean the mess. Sorry for ruining your night like this, babe. I-I really wasn’t planning on it to take this long but I forgot to buy one of the products and I thought I could wing it without it but...I very clearly can’t so...“
“Please, stop talking. I don’t need to know what sins you’ve committed - if I do I’ll probably have to give you the silent treatment for like a week or so.“ I call out to him as I quickly skip over to the kitchen to leave the food I bought on my way over before returning to the bathroom and carefully taking a step inside, mindful of where there are hair strands on the tiles. Even severed, his hair is beautiful and I have a ton of respect for it - ok fine, I adore it. Corpse definitely doesn’t appreciate it properly. I walk over to the shower, reaching out to the two shelves inside which are lined with different types of hair products. “Oh fuck...“ I let out the whisper without even realizing it because I’m so stunned by the brands I see on those shelves. “Corpse, um, what the actual fuck?”
He turns to me, eyes wide and terrified because of my menacing tone. “What? What is it?” His gaze searches the spot where mine was just pointed at, looking for anything that could’ve provoked such a reaction from me. Seeing nothing but the hair products, he meets my deadly glare yet again, “What’s wrong?”
Alright, this man-child needs some serious help
“I’ll tell you what’s wrong.“ I say, stomping towards the exit of the bathroom, “You’re gonna stay here and wait for me to come back and don’t you DARE, even touch your hair, let alone bring a pair of scissors or any chemical near it. Copy?“
“Copied and pasted, ma’am.“ He salutes me, knowing better than to ask questions when I enter my commander role. There are quite a few things that set me off into this bossy-ass persona, and hair mistreatment is most definitely one of them. Thing is, Corpse doesn’t know that. Well, he didn’t know that, pretty sure he’s guessed it by now.
Feeling myself soften at his obedience and trust, I give him a smile and a wink over my shoulder as I go to grab my bag and leave the apartment to complete my mission, “Good boy.”
                                                              *  *  *
“Isn’t that a lot better?“ I ask, gently running my fingers through Corpse’s freshly cut, washed and dried hair. I’ve spent a good five minutes just smoothing through it with my fingers. I bet he’s expecting me to say ‘my precious‘ at any moment now, and trust me it’s tempting, but I still don’t, I won’t give him the pleasure of predicting my actions. Wow, we’ve really reached that level of being familiar with one another that I predict that he’s predicting what I’m gonna do next. While I’m a guessing game for him, I tend to think of myself as more of an open book. You just gotta be fluent in the language it’s written in to understand it.
I’ve gone off-topic, my bad.
“Yeah, you’re a lot less scary now.“ He tells me, his hand finding mine in his hair and taking it to his lips to place a kiss on my knuckles.
We’re positioned so that we’re in front of the bathroom mirror with Corpse seated in a chair in front of me and I’m for once in my life towering over him from behind. Our height difference was threatening to be a hinderance in my work on his hair, but we easily figured it out.
I can’t help but laugh, “You know what I meant.“ I curl one of his already curly strands around the pointer finger of the hand that’s still wandering around the soft dark curls while the other remains in his gentle hold, resting on his shoulder.
“And you know what I meant.“ He shifts in his seat to look at me directly, not via the mirror, “Since when do you have a hair infatuation?“
I roll my eyes and retract my hands, defensively folding my arms over my chest, “It’s not an infatuation with hair, dummy. It’s an infatuation with your hair.” I correct him, doing quick work of styling the stray strands that fall over his forehead and eyes. “I really like your hair, you already know that. I can’t handle the thought you’re doing such a shitty job taking care of it.”
He shrugs, furrowing his brows, “Hey, I was buying top-shelf products, cost me a fortune every month, my hair was being treated like royalty.”
I roll my eyes once again, “High price doesn’t always equal high quality, Corpse. Did you ever stop to read what was in those products?” I don’t let him answer, I don’t need him to confirm what I already know. “Even if you did - which you didn’t - you wouldn’t know what each of those ingredients do to your hair. You see, taking care of hair, especially hair like yours, takes patience and knowledge. It’s practically an art form. It’s not like you can just buy any product that has ‘suitable for curly hair’ on it. There’s a lot more to that.”
It’s only after I finish my monologue that I realize he’s looking at me with amazed amusement in his gaze, almost like a parent listening to their kid talk about their wish of becoming an astronaut. “Since when do you know so much about hair? You’ve been using the same shampoo and conditioner since I know you and now you wanna lecture me on hair care?”
I raise an eyebrow at him, exasperated by his stubbornness on the matter,��“Who said being consistent with your hair products is a bad thing? You know, frequent changing of brands has the potential of being damaging as much as aiding.” I explain with the most amount of patience I can muster, now taking over the parent role myself, “And as for your previous question, I know so much because my mother is a hairdresser.”
His eyes widen in surprise. I can practically see the gears in his brain turning as he tries to recall if I’ve ever told him this before.
“How come I don’t know that?“ He asks finally after a long moment of silence. “Why haven’t you told me?”
“You ask that as though I just tell you things like that on the regular. Did you also want me to drop the info that my dad’s a mechanic in passing conversation about video games? Cause that’s a little hard to shoehorn in....“ He cuts off my sarcastic rambling with a brief peck to the lips. He’s the only person allowed to shut me up, and only like that. Anything else will earn him either an earful or a silent treatment. 
Just kidding....unless...
“So, does that mean you’re continuing the family business?“ he asks when he pulls away, “I mean, you’re technically my personal hairdresser now.“
I furrow my brows playfully, “Wait, what? Since when?”
“Since I hired you approximately an hour ago.“ He beams up at me, satisfied that I’ve fallen in his trap.
“And what about my payment?“ I ask, narrowing my eyes at him.
He looks to be contemplating for a second before he stands up from the chair, taking my hand in his leading me out of the bathroom, “Well, each appointment you’ll give me a different price, Miss Y/L/N. But, considering today was your first day, I choose to pay you with dinner.“ He sends a wink my way, laughing when he’s met with an unamused expression on my part as I stop in my tracks, causing him to halt his movements as well.
“You really plan on paying me with the dinner I bought?“ I raise an eyebrow at him, freeing my hand from his so I can put both my hands on my hips for the complete 'I’m far from impressed’ look.
“Yeah...? Problem?“ He asks, faking nervousness and guilt as he closes the distance between us, once again returning to the default of towering over me instead of it being the other way around.
“Several actually. First of all...“ I raise my finger in the air accusingly, ready to go off but the arm that wraps around my waist and lifts me off the ground causes my words to die down, evaporating in a frightened squeal, “Corpse no!! Put me down!“
Of course, he ignores me, carrying me into the living room while I don’t know whether to thrash or stay as still as possible. 
Tsk, so much for gratitude
@maat-the-prescriptive  @simonsbluee  @save-the-sky  @itsminniekat  @hacker-ghost  @bi-andready-tocry  @imtiredaffff  @jazzkaurtheglorious  @hereforbeebo  @fandomgirl17  @chrysanthykios  @maehemscorpyus  @loraleiix  @letsloveimagines  @annshit  @i-cant-choose-a-username-help  @enigmaticmaze  @divine-artemis  @waterlilypat  @idontknowwhatthisisfam  @evi-ka  @classyandfabulous00  @redperson58  @lilysdaydreams @solowheein  @mythicalamphitrite  @axen-gers  @luckygirl144  @nj01  @buddyemily   @the-albino-lioness  @stardream14  @gdhdkfnn  @nomadicgypsyy  @preciousskye  @fluffysuicideunicornsworld  @o-kaelin  @manacharlotte  @awkward-youtube-trash  @lolalee24  @bonky-beerns  @meme-lord-and-savior-sebastian  @strawbrinkofdeath  @teenloves  @tams0527  @browneyespinkhair  @starstruckllamapuppy  @daisychains012  @y0ulooked  @tinytacosuitcaseflap @supernatural-is-my-only-life  @jula-pauline  @melodykitty  @just-that-bi-girl  @crazybutconfidentaf  @lowellshade @alphakees  @bellero  @weallneednamjesus  @starryhanji  @boiled-onionrings  @husherstan  @fockingwhore  @melaningoddessthings  @prettypastelpetals  @haleypearce  @godwhyamiawkward  @y-napotat  @daisychainyoonmin  @little-miss-rebel3  @free-wheelin-bi-sexual  @redmoon261 @darkacademic2  @wiseflamingoqueen  @into-the-end  @namikhai-i  @nastiablr  @thelittleplantlover  @mirktuan  @dont-hyuck @jjk-bunny  @vintagegothlover  @easygoingtheatre  @itsrandombooklover  @miiaivi  @emmybaybee  @befourgolden  @jjk-is-my-shit  @eternalteaaars  @spacebadgerx  @princesslunalight  @acequinn14  @samm48  @misselsbells06 @simp-lykawa  @fo-love  @marishimomura-blog  @therealglenncoco  @cinnamonbun332  @killtherandomness  @sanshinexxxsan  @fee-btheweeb  @press-lay  @cathleenpotgieter16  @jazzydoesstuff  @moonlxghtbay  @forestrain2000  @hyunjinhugs  @blood-of-fandoms  @lovellylies  @ukiyolixx  @simpforhpcharacters  @chrisdylan17  @parkerjisung  @pedernille  @theodonyous  @wineandionysus  @malfoystilinskii05  @morbid-x  @coryisagee  @jessewa26  @scoobydooluver97 @mindintheskies365  @raeanneinwonderland  @indecisive-empanada  @gluttonypalace  @loriane2503  @btsiguess-kpop  @khaoticbunny  @lucidlycactus  @smiithys  @rottenroyalebooks  @kpopgirlbtssvt  @fangirl-tc27  @fr0z3n-1  @notmesimpingfortechno  @shotarosleftpinky  @kunoi-chan  @idk-whats-wrong-with-me  @yikeroonie  @goldenstarofthunderclan  @poetry-and-tea  @ama-do-writing-stuff  @wishbonewolf  @emeraldxhope  @t0xick1tty  @kusuinko  @speakyourselfloveyourself  @sophia902103  @lo-manburg  @classsykittykat  @dmgama  @depressedpuppythatneedscoffee  @btsiguess-kpop  @akaashi-baby  @gun-jong-simp  @geschichtenfee  @yerapotato-wp  @browneyedgirl365  @thysagclub  @sparklycloudnight  @helloatomicshadow  @queentorresstuff @vtte @val-gal  @lucy-bunny17  @aaliyahh0  @katluckybear  @boyleanti  @straybids  @franchesca-791  @cosmicstorm19  @averyisbackinthetrashcan  @aomi-nabi  @xlanawriter  @allensimpsforcorpse
428 notes · View notes
heliosthegriffin · 4 years ago
Text
Farmer Jaune #1
AN: here’s a little background for you people, places, or things, I love Stardew Valley... That’s all.
Summary: Jaune takes a bet with his father that if he can get the old family farm up in running he’ll have shown enough dedication to be a huntsman.
Forteen year old Jaune stood in front of ‘The Club’ at lunch time carrying large crate of assorted fruits on his left shoulder for this Junior guy to try, while in his right he played on his scroll while the two bouncers out front refused to let him in.
Sure, he could barge in, but that’d be rude and create a bad impression on a potential buyer. So the stuck up suits could glare at him all they wanted, he’d wait till Junior saw him or picked up his scroll, or they finally let him in.
Huh, who knew Spruce Willis liked to garden, another reason to look to the guy as a man among men.
The two suits kept a steady glare on the boy with bangs covering the his right eye, only leaving a single blue orb to stare at his scroll. He was all lean muscle, tanned skin, and sun-bleached hair package up in a dirt stained tee and blue jeans.
They’re were sure that they could take him, and there were no notices about a fruit shipments, so they were ready to put down a scam-artist if they had too. Though, if he was a scam-artist he really was easy going.
“So, ‘Mr. Arc’,” One of the suits said as sarcastically as possible.
“Just Jaune.” Jaune said boredom, hoping Junior wasn’t messing with him, if he was he’d have to sic dad on him.
The guards snicker. “Ok Just Jaune,” Jaune rolls his single visible eye. “What do you got in the crate?” “Are you mugging me? Because if you are that’s just lame, it’s a crate full of fruit, how poor are you if need to mug a man for fruit? Delicious, juicy fruit sure, but just fruit.” Jaune say rapid-fire without looking up from him scroll.
The suit who spoke up went flush with anger at the insinuation, he worked for the damn mob! He made very good illegal money! He didn’t even recorded it to the irs that’s how bad he was!
Suit two just snickered at his friend. “I think what my buddy meant was what do have in the box to sell to the boss, and why do you think he’d buy from you over importing from Mistral or bulk buying from the Agri-Dis?”
Jaune rolled his eye again. “For the fourth time he asked me to bring him a crate, which I would have delivered to him by now, and gotten some lunch to if you two lumper didn’t get in the way.”
“And for the fourth time your not on the list, so try sell us on your product and we might let you in!” The first suit said exsperated. “Also why not just eat some produce?”
Jaune shrugged. “Same reason, I’m going to refuse to sell any to you two right now, cause I have things called standards. I always include a little extra on the orders so that people know their appreciated! If I took that away, it’d ruin the magic!”
Jaune then said with a smile, “That said if you’re interested, I can give my website to place an order, and little peak of the goods too.” Jaune said wiggling an eyebrow.
The second suit let out a tired sigh, knowing that this would be long day already. “Ok, back to my second question first, why would anyone buy from you some dirty looking kid from outside the city walls, instead of the nice clean stalls at the Agri-Dis? Also, I make good money wouldn’t I just import good food from Mistral or Vacuo?”
“Ok, find you’ve worn me down fine. Ok first, the Agric-Dis’s food is abysmal grown for two thing!” Jaune said putting away his scroll, and then holding up two finger making them glow with the light of his soul, making both guards jump at the realization this boy was also a hunter in training. “Bulk production, and fast regrowth speed, they inject Earth dust into the soil to make it more fertile, and genetically mod the plants so they grow as fast as possible and big as possible with account for taste! Which to be fair isn’t a bad thing, the city is overpopulated as is, and the Agri-Dis needs to feed everyone, and neither dust usage or gene mods are intrinsically bad, just that bulk produce doesn’t always taste as good as growing something with love and care!”
The two suits inched back in shock at Jaunes passionate rant, and the first suit recovered faster and asked. “Alright, you’ve made a good point. But what about outsourcing production to Mistral or Oasis in Vacuo? They’re food is really good!”
Jaune held a finger as he regained his breath.
“Ok, that’s a fair point, Vacuo has a warmer climate than Vale so it’s easier to grow more crop in season there in certain areas, and Mistral has the same benefit, but, it’s not the food that bad but the prices, and time you have to wait in between shipments.”
The suits leaned in with interest.
“This also has a couple problems, compared to my products.” Jaune holding up his free hand, letting it glow freely to attract the suits attention. “First, is the price you’d paying is roughly three time as much as my own for virtually the same product.” Jaune said slowly and methodically, letting it sink into the mens minds, he’d never let a potential customer get away, even if they were goons.
“Second is bidding, when you order from out of kingdom your have to compete with everyone else who wants that food, which also is reason the price is higher they can afford to hike it because it’s in demand, so since it’s in demand that means people want it, which implies scarcity, so even if you place an order there no garuntee that they’ll have any left for you.“ “I never thought of that way when I saw the restock sign...” “Most people don’t, in fact most people don’t care about the quality of the food long as it’s good and edible. So like I said limited supply, right? Well, right now I have tons of food to sell, I won’t be running out either,” Jaune said with a smirk, “but for how long? Anyway, another problem if your foods coming from outside the kingdom means that it’s coming outside the kingdom, this is two probelm. One, you’re weakening the local market, while strengthening foreign market, and you don’t want freaking Vacuo to be stronger than Vale in anyway right?” Jaune asked slyly.
“No..”
“The other problems with outsourcing from out of kingdom, is the shorter shelf lift, shipping takes time, you know this, you’re smart guys right?”Jaune asked the men, who quickly nodded. “Well, you should know that caravans only come so often, there could be month in-between you ordering your product and actually getting it! So your food could be moldy and black!”
The suits looked at each other, remembering the bosses fits of rage about a ruined order of fruit, and their own bad experiences with outsourcing. Conveinently forgeting this only happened once or twice, out of the hundreds of times they’ve ordered.
Jaune continued, “The final problem is it’s outside the kingdom anything can happen! Bandits, grimm, White Fang, Then Bam!” Jaune punctuating by slamming his hand against the crate. “You just lost three hundred lien by ordering from freaking Vacuo, what the hell you’d expect from ordering from those them, it’s all gone now! And it’s all your fault from ordering from Vacuo!” Jaune said quickly, and almost out of breath.
The men scowled at the idea of letting Vacuo pull a fast one on proud Valemen like themselves.
“Now, on the other hand my produce is loved and cared for only a mere half hour away in hunter protected settlement of Stardew Valley. Barring in-climate weather, or Grimm, I will have your product, if it’s ready for shipping out, to you within a week or you get the shipping free! Bam!” Jaune slammed his hand on the box again. “You just cut your grocery bill by a two-thirds!”
Silence then filled the gap again.
“So, did I answer you gentlemen’s questions?” Jaune asked with a slightly sore throat.
“I think I’ll be taking a look at your scrollsite later today,” The second suit said, then smiles thinly. “I just hope you’re not exaggerating, but regardless you got me rethinking my spending habits!”
The men and boy let out a little chuckle.
“Alright how about I let you two see what it’s in the crate to see proof of product.” Jaune said easing the crate on two the ground, easily being twice as wide as his waist, and coming up to his torso.
The men gave a shrug.
Jaune undid the latch on the crate and opened it up, assulting the men with sweet, starchy, and delcious smells of produce, their mouths involuntarily starting to water at the sight of fresh cherries, ripe melons, golden-yellow corn, full and juicy blackberries, tart and sweet blueberries, the spicy red hot peppers, ripe to bursting tomatos, and the most robust coffee they’ve ever smelt.
Jaune then slammed the lid closed a minute later, and put the crate onto his shoulder.
“Arc! What are you doing here? I told you to meet me at noon, and I’d meet you at the Club, not for you to wait for me outside the Club for an hour.”
“Dad say “If you’re early you’re on time, if you’re on time you’re late, if you’re late, everybody’s dead and you’ve lost your huntsman license.”
“Whatever, just follow me in, and we’ll hash out the deal today.” Junior looked at his men. “I’m not mad, you did well.”
“I’m not mad either, just bored.” Jaune said slipping in.
.....
“So, you wanna go half in, on a order?” “Why not? All that talking got me hungry.”
28 notes · View notes
melodicmermaid · 8 years ago
Text
...Dead Sea Minerals?
Read on AO3
Summary:
Lance is running out of his face masks and has given up on expecting to replenish his stock. Keith decides to fix the problem.
Happy Valentine’s Day (Klancentine’s Day? Is that stretching it?) @mangomomm! I’m your secret gifter for @klancevalentines‘ exchange. c: I hope you enjoy the fic!
I’m literally the worst at titling things; I’m sorry. ;w;
Keith sat in the dining area of the castle with everyone except for Hunk, who was finishing up with breakfast, and Lance, who was either still sleeping or still getting ready. He figured the latter, since Lance was usually with the rest of the group by the time they started eating. Since the blue paladin insisted that he needed to get a full eight hours of sleep every night, he was more often than not the last one to start his day. Of course, he was a royal pain in the ass if he missed out on sleep, so it was preferred that he was late. Keith would never admit it out loud, but he admired Lance’s ability to do what he did to keep himself upbeat and as happy as he could be, being stranded out in space.
As Hunk started bringing over the plates of food, Lance walked in, pouting, and before anyone could ask about it, he was whining. “This is a tragedy! An outrage! My entire life is about to be ruined!”
“What’s going on, Lance?” Shiro questioned. They all knew he was probably being more dramatic than the situation called for. Shiro always let him talk, just in case the issue actually pertained to everyone else on the ship. Regardless, they all knew that when Lance was upset, it was best to let him talk about it.
“I’m almost out of my skincare products! I only have enough for tomorrow!”
“Have you talked to Allura and Coran about Altean skincare? Or asked about looking during a supply run?” Pidge suggested, not looking up from their plate of food.
“Yes! Altean anything is scary and Allura has insisted that anything like what I need is either going to be extremely expensive or in Galra territory and it’s not worth risking it for a luxury,” Lance was visibly frustrated.
“The best we can do then is just look out for it when we make stops. I’m sure you’ll be fine living without it until then,” Shiro tried to be comforting.
“Ugh, I should have looked while we were in the space mall. There would have been something there and it’s hopeless to ask Allura to go back.”
“We don’t need to have perfect skin to fight against Zarkon. It doesn’t matter how we look,” Keith chimed it.
“This isn’t about that! It’s about taking care of myself so I can fight well!” Lance snapped, stomping out of the room. Shiro frowned.
When Lance was out of earshot, Hunk spoke up, “Lance has always taken his skincare routine very seriously. He’s done it for years. Now, I think it’s more important to him than it was before since it’s the one from Earth that he still has, er, had.”
Keith suddenly felt like a jerk.
This morning was still replaying in Keith’s head even as he tried to train. He couldn’t bring himself to focus, so he shut the system down and went to change out of his paladin armor. He knew he shouldn’t be fretting over Lance being upset, but he couldn’t help it. They were getting to be pretty good friends at this point, and Keith had recently acknowledged and accepted the fact that he had feelings for Lance. He never intended to do anything about it, especially given the whole Voltron situation. He didn’t want to act on them and mess up the entire team and pursuing a relationship when they had the universe to defend didn’t seem like the best idea anyway.
Regardless, Keith felt bad about what he had said and wanted to do something that would make Lance feel better. He found himself walking to the control room, where he assumed Allura would be.
“Oh, Keith! Is there something you need?” Allura greeted him as he walked inside.
“Uh, actually, yeah, it’s about Lance-”
“Lance and his desperate need for his beauty supply stock to be replenished?” She smirked and rolled her eyes, “I got the monologue from him this morning. I’d offered to show him some Altean products weeks ago before this was even a thought, but he refused.”
“Are we stopping for supplies soon?”
“We should reach a planet that has some things we need for the ship by tomorrow morning. But I’ve told him, it’s going to be too expensive or there’s not going to be anything at all.”
“I’ve hardly spent any of my allowance. I’m sure I’ll have enough. Let me go?”
Allura sighed, but smiled. “Alright. I’ll take you, Hunk, and Coran with me tomorrow. Don’t expect anything, but then again, you’d be much less insufferable about it than Lance.”
“Thank you, Princess.”
The next morning went as Allura said it would. Lance, of course, complained about not getting to go since he usually goes when Hunk does and he wanted to look for potential products.
“I’ve chosen the best team based on what we know about this planet and its inhabitants. I’m sorry, Lance, but I won’t risk it for a luxury item,” Allura calmly explained. The explanation was enough to stop him from vocalizing more discontent, but he would probably be pouting all day.
One the ship taking them down to the planet, Allura explained that she’d be going to talk politics while the three of them would head to the market. “Keith will be going on his own to look for something to bring back for Lance.”
“Wait, what? Seriously?” Hunk looked over to the red paladin.
“Yeah. I probably have enough money since I haven’t spent any of my share.”
“Aw, young love!”
“Hunk.”
“Relax, I’m just messing with you, but this is, like, really nice of you,” he paused, “For the record, though, your crush is not subtle and we all know. Well, Lance doesn’t know. He’s beyond oblivious.”
“Whatever. I won’t do anything about it.”
“This is kinda doing something about it. But, hey, it’s your decision and I’m not gonna meddle.”
They landed without much more discussion. Allura went off on her on and Hunk and Coran parted with him once they made it to the market, agreeing to meet back at the entrance in two hours.
As he walked, he mostly saw ship parts, food, what looked like toys or trinkets, and tons of other things he had no idea how to categorize, though he was certain they weren’t skin products. He listened to conversations of shoppers that passed him, but heard nothing. He could keep walking around, but he knew it’d be much quicker to try and ask someone.
“Um, excuse me?” he asked, approaching what looked like a family. They eyed him curiously, but stopped walking to let him speak, “I don’t know if you can help me out a bit, but I’m looking for a place that sells, uh, skincare stuff or beauty products? Is there anything like that here?”
“Keep going all the way down this row of stands, then turn right at the end. It’ll be on your left, though they will likely be low on stock, if there is anything left at all,” the tallest one answered.
“Thank you,” Keith waved and walked the way that he was instructed.
Just as the alien had described, there was a stand with a small creature trying to draw in customers. He approached the table and was immediately greeted by the salesalien. “Welcome! What can I get for you?”
“My friend is out of… stuff. I have a list of what’s in it, but it’s from Earth. I don’t know if you’ll have anything similar? It’s mostly, uh, dead sea minerals?�� He had no idea how in the world something like that could make up a face product, but Lance must've known what he was doing.
“Earth? Never heard of it. Let me see that list,” she reached her hand out and Keith gave her the slip of paper, “Water, kaolin, bentonite, maris sal, linalool, methylchloroisothiazolinone…” she mumbled the items on the list to herself with a thoughtful expression. “Can I test my products on your arm?”
Keith nodded and pulled off the armor and the gloves from his suit before reaching his arm over the table. The alien began putting a little bit of a bunch of products onto his skin.
“Does anything burn? Sting? Feel like it’s doing something it shouldn’t?”
“It’s not painful. I don’t know what they’re supposed to feel like, but um, is it supposed to dry like this one or this one?” he pointed to two of the lines of the cream.
The salesalien giggled, “This one is meant to be washed off and this one is meant to be peeled, so they should be drying differently. If none of them are causing any pain or discomfort by now they are all safe for your species to use. I don’t know what your friend’s skin is like, so I can’t make any specific recommendations. Take your pick.”
Keith had hoped only one or two things would be safe so he didn’t have to chose. He didn’t even know what Lance’s skin was like, so he had to wing it.
About five minutes later, the salesalien was beaming and Keith had almost no money left. He did, however, have an abundance of product for Lance. When he met up with Coran and Hunk, the two raised their eyebrows. When Allura joined them, she looked amused. They’d probably never let go of the fact that Keith definitely panicked and bought everything.
Hunk agreed to keep Lance busy enough for Keith to put all the products away in Lance’s cabinet in the bathroom. He didn’t want to make it a bigger deal than he knew it was already going to be. Once that was all settled, he returned to the rest of the team and listened to Allura’s post-mission announcements, then headed to his room.
Lance’s heart was racing. He had gone into the bathroom, prepared to scrape out whatever little bit remained in his products before he turned in for the night and was met with cabinets full of lotions and face masks and scrubs.
Impulsively, he ran out of the bathroom and bumped into Shiro. “Lance? Everything okay?”
“WholeftallthethingsinmycabinetdidAllur--”
“Woah, slow down there.”
“Who left the stuff in my cabinets? Was it actually Allura?”
“From what I heard, that would be Keith.”
“What!?” Lance’s jaw dropped.
“Don’t look at me. If you want to know, he’s the one you need to talk to.”
Lance didn’t know how to react. Shiro left him alone to process the information that Keith was the mystery gifter. Keith was the last person Lance would have expected to do something like this. He found himself walking to Keith’s room, which was right next to his room so he supposed he could just go back to his room if he chickened out. He tapped on the door, pretty quietly, but he was sure that it was heard. The door slid open a few moments later.
“Oh, uh, hey Lance,” Keith’s voice faltered a little bit, not having expected Lance to approach him so quickly, “Can I… help you?”
“Didn’t you already?” Lance chuckled.
“Ah, yeah. It was nothing, really.”
“‘Nothing really’ he says! Keith I could kiss you I’m so happy.” Keith’s eyes widened. “It’s a figure of speech!” Keith visibly released some of the tension from his muscles, and Lance took the opening to step forward and gave him a quick peck on the corner of his mouth. “But actually kissing you works, too.”
“Don’t tease me like that,” Keith looked down and reached for the button to close the door, “You’re welcome for the stuff.”
“Hey, hey, wait a minute! I’m not teasing you,” he blocked the door from closing with his arm, “Do you want to… try some of the product with me?”
Keith was silent for a few moments, but eventually nodded. “Yeah, okay.”
“Great! You kinda bought enough to last me like a year.”
“I didn’t know what I was doing.”
“Obviously,” Lance took hold of Keith’s wrist and led him down the hallways and into the bathroom.
Lance was bouncing as he pulled one of the face masks off the cabinet shelf. They say across from each other on the bathroom floor. “Alright, Keithy,” Keith’s heart skipped a beat at the nickname, “I’ll put this on my face and then you just copy what I do on your own face.”
He nodded and watched as Lance took some of the substance onto two of his fingers and started slowly rubbing it on his left cheek in circular motions. He spread it across his cheek, then on to his chin, and then on to the other cheek. He took more of the cream as he needed and kept the same motion going, adjusting the size of the circles as needed, all over his face until it was completely covered. “Your turn!”
The bottle was pushed toward him, so Keith did the same, or what he thought was the same. He took the cream onto his fingers and then began rubbing it on his face.
“Keith! Keith, no!”
“What?”
“You literally just watched me do it, no, you know what, give me that,” Lance snatched up the bottle and scooted closer to Keith, “I’ll just put it on you. Bonding moment, right?”
Lance reached his hand up and began fixing the glob that Keith had rubbed onto his face. His touch was gentle, and he moved his hand in the same circular motion he’d used before. He pulled away to add more of the cream to his fingers, and Keith shivered at the contact this time. “Everything okay?”
“Yeah. Yeah, it’s fine. A little cold, but, uh, fine.” Lance nodded and kept going. It took a bit longer for Keith’s face to get covered, probably because Lance just wasn’t used to putting this stuff on other people. Regardless, it was over and Lance was no longer in his personal bubble. “These things really do look stupid.”
“It’s not about how they look while they’re on, it’s about the magic that happens and what you look like afterward.”
“Magic? You mean making my face stiff and uncomfortable?”
“Stop talking, you’re gonna make both of our crack and fall off.”
“Our faces?” Keith joked, though he tried not to smirk.
“Oh my god no the ma- oh, you’re joking. Shut up.”
They sat in mostly silence. Lance started humming something that Keith didn’t recognize, but he did like it. He hadn’t expected to enjoy sitting with Lance like this, even if his face felt extremely unpleasant. It was times like this when Lance wasn’t being overly dramatic or too outspoken that reminded Keith how much he liked Lance. It was times like this when he wanted nothing more than to act on his feelings.
The humming stopped suddenly, making Keith look up and into Lance’s eyes. Since when were they so... blue?
“Can I kiss you?” the words left Keith’s mouth before he could stop them. He saw Lace’s expression falter, as much as it could with the mask.
“Didn’t… didn’t I already-”
“Lance.” The boy in question nodded, and Keith moved toward him. Their lips touched, barely, but Lance backed away abruptly.
“No, nope, no, no, no, no I just got the mask in my mouth that was disgusting.” Lance sputtered and Keith couldn’t help but laugh.
It wasn’t long before their faces were washed. Keith had to admit that these things really do work; his face felt very nice and overall he felt refreshed. They walked back to their rooms, and both stopped in front of Lance’s door. “Do you… want to come in for a while?”
Lance blushed, looking expectantly at Keith. “Yeah, alright.”
He opened the door and as they walked inside he commented, “I mean, I guess I owe you a kiss. Or two. Or more.”
“I guess you do.”
10 notes · View notes