#really liked how this turned out so gj me!!!

[hottubsandwiches]

needed to draw scar in the sunflower field after seeing his tweet about it

[heartsoji]

kenma + cuddles + stormy weather + only one bed

a/n: writing more comfort for myself bc there have been too many thunderstorms i hate this someone move me to antartica with the penguins and no thunder ALSO sorry if the grammar is wrong or smth i didn't proofread lol

you sighed.

"this sucks."

kuroo, the outdoorsy one of the group, decided that it would be fun to go camping. however, knowing that the two of you preferred the indoors and hated bugs, he decided to rent a cabin. (which was actually kinda sweet and considerate gj kuroo)

however, he made a little misclick and accidentally ordered a cabin with one bed. for the three of you.

so he called up the owners of the cabin and asked if they had any futons or anything, to which they told him to go buy himself a bed or a futon lol

so kuroo, being the prideful idiot he is, decided to drive AN HOUR AND A HALF back to civilization to buy 2 WHOLE ASS BEDS when it was 1am (nvm kuroo ur an idiot)

now, the two of you were stuck in a tiny little cabin that kuroo was going to jam TWO WHOLE BEDS in

tbh at this point u were ready to just SLEEP and kenma was literally melting onto the floor

buuuut there was only one bed and the two of you were too scared to sleep on it bc ur both v observant people and noticed that the other looked dead

so after these like rly awkward 15 minutes where there was no talking and no sound, you both sat on the couch (that literally felt like cardboard wtf kuroo) and you watched kenma play games on his game boy bc there was NO SERVICE and also you genuinely enjoy watching him play games bc he has the CUTEST EXPRESSIONS when he plays games

however, at some point, it started raining and you two got a text from kuroo

from 'rooster' to you and 'kenma':

The rain back here is rly bad so I have to wait it out. Be back tmrw :)

the two of you decided to suck it up after joking around and insulting him for a good 5 minutes (were ugs rly joking ?) and grabbed a blanket and sat back down on the cardboard couch.

you liked the rain. it was nice that there was more sound in the cabin that just the sound of buttons being rapidly pressed.

however, at some point, the rain turned into a thunderstorm.

you were terrified, to say the least. thunder has always been one of your absolute worst fears.

however, you didn't want to make a scene. especially not in front of your crush.

but ofc kenma being the observant man he is, noticed that you were gripping onto his shoulder a little tighter, and that you slightly tensed up whenever the thunder in the background roared. (for context you were holding onto his shoulder to see his game)

when he eventually came to the conclusion that you were terrified of thunder, he wasn't really sure what to do. comfort you? turn off his game? have you go to sleep? play some music? like what was he supposed to do

lucky for him, you figure out what he has to do for him. when a particularly loud and boomy thunder (they're all loud and boomy but this one was VERY loud and boomy) roars, you instinctively curl yourself close to him, eyes shut in terror.

he knows what to do now.

he turns off his game boy, sets it aside, and gently holds you close as he rubs your back.

"it's ok." he whispers soothingly. "it's all ok."

you're veryslightly embarrassed by the fact that you're literally curled up with your crush right now, but you don't really have time to think about the embarrassment with the thunder in the background

however, he provides you the sweetest comfort (contrary to my thunder comfort hcs lmao) and just wordlessly rubs your back and runs his fingers through your hair (bc he knows how good it feels lol)

his comfort is so nice that you end up falling asleep curled into him.

after your breathing steadies and he knows you're asleep, he lets his emotions show a bit more. the stupid smile that he's been biting back unleashes itself and finds its way onto his features. he gazes down at your sleeping figure, all curled up and snuggling into his chest, and feels his cheeks heat up a little. he lets himself drift of to sleep too.

you both end up waking up bc the couch is hard as cardboard about an hour later. he sighs and offers you the bed but you refuse immediately. the couch was uncomfortable af, the floor was worse and you were not about to let him sleep on it.

however, the same went for him. it would appear that both of you were incredibly stubborn.

kenma was the one to propose the "how about we both sleep on the bed? it's a queen so there'll be enough room.."

he may look calm and cool as ever when saying this, but if you look at his ears, they're bright red.

you nervously agree, and the two of you slowly climb into the bed.

the bed wasn't super comfortable, but it was much better than the couch. you slowly drift off to sleep.

you and kenma were both woken up at the same time by a rooster (not kuroo, an actual rooster) cock-a-doodle-doo-ing. when you opened your eyes, you were met with kenma's face about two inches from yours.

"AH!" you both screamed and tried to jump away, but couldn't. you looked down and realized that the two of you had intertwined legs and hands at night in your sleep.

to say the least, you were embarrassed. you could feel your cheeks burning up, and you saw kenma's ears turn bright red.

"uhm.." kenma started. "i.."

"I'M BACK!! D'YA MISS ME?" kuroo (the actual one, not his twin who woke u up)

you both whipped ur heads around and tried to untangle yourselves before he saw, but it was too late.

"oya?" (I NEVER PUT ANYTHING DOWN IN JAPANESE BUT IT JUST FELT SO APPROPRIATE) he had the biggest smirk on his face.

"ding a ling ling! whoa look at that i have a call be right back~!"

that cheeky brat.

"so, um, kenma.." you started, not really knowing what to say.

he cut you off. "how about we have this conversation after the trip is over?"

"yeah. lets do that."

the rest of the trip was actually decently fun, especially knowing that your crush liked you back and that you could look forward to that conversation after it was over. and as much as you hated to admit it, it was all thanks to kuroo and his idiotic brain.

[zhongwans]

Going on a trip down memory lane in honor of the WOH concert's 2nd anniversary!

When May 3 rolled around everyone had mixed feelings because on one hand: YAY LLD REUNITING ON STAGE WITH THE REST OF THE GREMLIN CAST! but on the other, farewell concerts mean the end of the show's promotion period which also marks the end of interactions between the main actors. And worse, it also marks the start of CP breaking, whether it's just the actors being more distant and reserved with each other throughout the concert (compared to when they were promoting the show) or in the worst cases, like the Love and Redemption concert, where they broke CP so brutally.

But the worst of all (for me at least) is the gloating. The gloating of solo fans, the gloating of the fans of other CPs, and the ever insufferable presence of yxh accounts that have been trying (and failing) to make up conflict between GJ and ZZH the very moment the show started getting the tiniest bit of attention. When it was announced that their Tom Ford livestream was to be done separately, it was made a big deal with all those vultures screaming all over weibo how they were finally "competing with each other", and yxhs fanning the flames at the sidelines.

So when the concert rolled around the atmosphere in the fandom was bittersweet. The more experienced fans were telling us what to expect and going: "They'll probably break CP. There's nothing we can do except hope they'll do it gently".

But as we've learned before, the WOH fandom is a circus and the WOH cast our ever indulgent clowns. Fans found out that GJ and ZZH were sharing a dressing room for the concert and everyone lost their shit. And that's when we knew we were fools to think this farewell concert would be like every other farewell concert, because nothing about this fandom has been normal from the start 😂

In private, a lot of us were gearing each other up for the very strong possibility that GJ and ZZH will nowhere be as close in the concert as they seemed to be when they were promoting WOH. Turns out, not only did they seem even closer and more touchy than before, but the rest of the cast seemed to have finally snapped and lost their marbles altogether. Solo fansites were whining about how hard it was to get good solo photos of GJ and ZZH because they stuck close to each other throughout the entire event.

Even better, they didn't seem conscious of the attention at all. The crowd in the concert hall screamed at the smallest interactions between them and they didn't even look fazed. I wouldn't have blamed them if the screaming made them feel awkward and conscious, but the fact that they just didn't care and even occasionally played along with the hoard of screaming shippers just made me appreciate them even more for being so natural about it and not treating it as something to be ashamed of.

And going beyond showing it with actions, ZZH also verbally acknowledged the fans that like both of them in his speech at the end of the concert. It's often said in CN fan circles that being a CPF from a BL drama is the hardest road to take as a fan (in c-ent at least) because it puts you at the very bottom of the fan heirarchy. CPFs in general are at the very bottom of the fan pyramid but BL CPFs in particular are considered to be even lower. It's a given not to mention you or acknowledge you, and you should only exist in the very fringes of fandom. That's why a lot of BL novel fans (I'm talking about c-fandom specifically) don't really like live action adaptations or their actors, because to them these actors are just using the stories they love to gain popularity, and once they get what they want are quick to toss it and its fans aside as some kind of dark and shameful secret of the past that has to be buried. That's why ZZH's acknowledgement at the end of the concert meant a lot to CPFs, because finally, they get to have a 'seat' at the table along with everyone else.

And of course, the promise and the hug that melted even the most jaded c-fandom veterans 😂

It was really a privilege to be allowed to witness this moment. They could have taken the easier path but chose instead to share this moment with us. It truly was amazing to see them hug and firmly cement their relationship (whatever it may be) in front of thousands of people (with many more watching through the stream) when the norm in the industry is to break CP at this point.

And boy did they mean it. Months after the end of the concert, they were still stubbornly expressing a sense of unity and support for each other. At a time when toxic ZZH fans were really ramping up their attacks against GJ, ZZH pinned his and GJ's duet on his weibo page not only once, but twice. When the livestream host refused to read out a fan's username that had ZZH's name on it, GJ bluntly asked her to read it out loud, saying that censoring it out "isn't polite".

And you gotta wonder if that's part of what all this is about. Since February 2021, there have been many attempts to discredit the close relationship between them and not only has it not stopped, it has gotten much worse. ZZH is no longer in the picture (publicly, at least) but they're still at it and their tactics growing more and more brutal and unhinged the more time passes. In the beginning, ZZH was the evil one who forced poor innocent GJ to do CP marketing with him, and now GJ is somehow an evil mastermind who used ZZH to do CP marketing against his will and crushing him after. Just what is this obsession? It's been almost two years now, ZZH is out of the public eye, his career halted indefinitely, and they're still at it. I'm sure there's more to it but I can't help but feel that part of the reason for all this is because in an industry that rewards the people who are willing to pull off the dirtiest tactics, and encourages the worst kind of competition, GJ and ZZH dared to to treat each other with so much sincerity and kindness.

And just so this post doesn't end on an angsty note, remember when after the concert people were crying and hugging each other, having mental and emotional breakdowns, only to see, about an hour later, videos of GJ and ZZH laughing and giggling onstage, whispering in each other's ear, and then singing "Love to fight if you want to win" together like a pair of newlyweds? Yeah. While the rest of us peons were crying our hearts out, those two were busy treating the concert afterparty like a wedding banquet. Truly the life of an NPC.

And lastly, before I become too emo and write five more paragraphs, I just want to say that even if I'm no longer posting as much about them, I'm always still here waiting.

任山高水远 你在我也在 🏔🍊

[lcs-library]

hi hi, can I request something for itaru? I don’t have anything specific in mind but just considering my love/hate for him how ‘bout just silly moments with him and some playful teasing where it’s like “I hate you so much” “aww, no you don’t ;)” and stuff like that haha. Just need to get that out of my system, he’s too strong rn 🙃

SCREAMING AND CRYING ONE OF MY FAVE A3! ARTISTS ASKING FOR WRITING??? FROM ME???? I AM NOT WORTHY😭😭😭😭😭 anyway. Ahem. Yes!! I love writing Itaru he’s such a gremlin. I had too many ideas banging around in my head, so I decided to write a bunch of lil drabbles n stuff instead of a headcanon list or a oneshot, so I hope that’s okay!! Thanks so much for requesting!

Request rules

1. Though he’d never admit it to anyone else, Itaru’s a huge sucker for affection, and loves taking time to laze around with you, even if you’re just holding hands.

On one particular afternoon, things got a little…silly.

He’s just a silly little guy, though, can you even blame him?

Anyway, the two of you were watching a show together on his couch, which slowly evolved into being fully wrapped around each other, then turned into play fighting? Which wasn’t uncommon for him, surprisingly.

It’s hard to tell if it could be classified as “fighting”, though, since it was more of the two of you holding hands and pushing each other away.

Point is, it was just a goofy way of showing affection.

Somehow, Itaru managed to get his flimsy body on top of you, and he lifted your shirt up, blowing the biggest, loudest raspberry on your stomach.

You couldn’t help but laugh despite being so done with how lame and cheesy he is.

Overall, stupid lil guy has stupid way of showing affection.

2. One night, while waiting for him to come home, you found yourself falling asleep in the middle of grinding one of his online games like he asked. Yes, he needed his dailies done, but he also needed to realize that you were infected with tired sleepy.

After about an hour or so of your nap, Itaru finally came home with a sigh, tossing his things to the side before laying his eyes on you. An affectionate smirk played at his lips as he came over to where you were sleeping.

“Guess I shouldn’t have asked you to help me out, my bad. GJ~,” he said softly, lightly patting your head.

Just then, a terrible idea popped into his head. The only question was: could he pull it off?

There was only one way to find out.

So he maneuvered his arms underneath your body, barely managing to hold you up.

And the second he barely lifted you off the couch, his arms gave out on him, dropping you right back onto it, waking you up.

“‘taru, whaddahell…” you mumbled lazily.

“Ah, morning, love,” he replied sweetly, acting as if nothing happened.

“What did you do?”

His face didn’t even falter at that being your default reply.

“I tried to carry you to bed.”

“With your noodle arms?”

“Yeah.”

“You’re so lame.” You replied fondly.

3. The two of you game a lot(surprise, surprise), with 2D fighting games usually being the favorite. Or really anything you could label as something that would ruin friendships. Like he’d get rid of you over a game.

On this particular evening, you were playing one of said 2D fighting games, but you just couldn’t win a single match.

This was a common occurrence, but this time, there was a specific technique that he was using with his character that you couldn’t seem to dodge, no matter how hard you tried.

“How the hell do you do that?”

“Want me to teach you?”

Without waiting for a reply, he shoved his controller in your hands, placing his over yours to guide your moves.

“So you wanna move the joystick three-quarters to the left, then X-X-B. Nope, too slow, try again. Okay, left, X-X-B. Mm-m. Don’t tell me you’re not paying attention and just like holding hands?”

He caught you red-handed.

“I hate you.”

“No you don’t,” he replied smugly with a wink.

You did learn the technique, though. Eventually.

4. After each one of his regional tours with the Spring Troupe, Itaru wants nothing more than to hold up in his room and play games for twelve hours straight.

As if he could have that now that you were here.

The second he opens the door, he’s greeted by you practically tackling him in a hug, causing him to crash and fall to the floor.

“Hey, calm down! I was gone for three days!”

“Haha, you’re so pathetic. Can’t even stand a welcome back hug?”

Oh, two could play at that game.

He pulled your body down to join him on the ground, practically showering you in kisses, to both your embarrassment and delight.

“Alright, fine, I missed you too.” He says with a goofy grin on his face, his tone of voice trying to make it seem as if he wasn’t desperate to give you attention not even two seconds ago.

He’s the worst<3

5. On his days off, Itaru usually wears big, comfy sweatshirts to lounge around in(that you may or may not have stolen one or two of).

An annoying thing he does with them is sneak up behind you and shove you in there with him.

He’ll sneak up behind you, and the next thing you see is a blur of fabric before being held close to someone’s chest.

“Hello~.”

“Hi??? Can you just come up and talk to me like a normal person?”

“No can do, sorry. Gotta shove you in here with me. Can’t let you go unless you ask for it.”

Fortunately, you weren’t going to any time soon.

Fortunately for him, you weren’t going to anytime soon.

“No can do, sorry. Gotta shove you in here with me. Can’t let you go unless you ask for it.” Fortunately for him, you weren’t going to anytime soon.

“Hi??? Can you just come up and talk to me like a normal person?”

“No can do, sorry. Gotta shove you in here with me. Can’t let you go unless you ask for it.” Fortunately for him, you weren’t going to anytime soon.

“Hello~.”

“Hi??? Can you just come up and talk to me like a normal person?”

“No can do, sorry. Gotta shove you in here with me. Can’t let you go unless you ask for it.” Fortunately for him, you weren’t going to anytime soon.

[hawkgirlz]

going to be honest. it might sound dumb but my theory on geoff johns making that deal with grant morrison for kendra to die in blackest night instead of final crisis was that kendra was supposed to come back after shiera got turned to dust but n52 interfered so we never really got it.

i personally think there was gonna be a lesson about how carter was so into the idea of shiera being back as he always wanted shiera since the minute kendra revived him, a pivotal plot point in hawkman 2002, but he would've later realized none of it was worth it at kendra's expense and that's why there was no funeral for her.

because the more i think about it, i don't think gj of all writers would be stupid enough to not hold a funeral for kendra. i genuinely think the real reason he never held one was because he always intended on her coming back. it's just too big of a detail.

and it also reminds me how kendra's funeral had already been drawn in mcduffie's jla for final crisis and roy would visit her grave but because of that deal gj made last minute, it never really happened and mcduffie had to change the dialogue to roy being in a graveyard for no apparent reason because the art was already turned in. like geoff johns KNEW a funeral should be held for her but he didn't do it. and he clearly enjoyed writing her too. she was 100% supposed to come back.

how could i forgot the fact that speed saunders never showed up either? like you're telling me THIS speed had no clue kendra died? the one geoff made ask carter to look after kendra? come on.

you know what my personal take would've been? my personal take is that carter would've found kendra alive again somewhere maybe in st. roch, but all her memories that came after shiera had revived her had been erased when she was revived so she would've remembered nothing from being 18 and onwards. i think that would've been a perfect ending to the arc as carter would've really lost everything and kendra would get to be happy since her parents' killer was gone which i'm sure she'd find out and carter would basically suffer because kendra has another memory loss plot but WORSE 🙈

[joylinda-hawks]

You're ashamed to undress in front of me, aren't you? Fine. Oh, and how's your wound? You don't have to tell me if you don't want to. WOH, episode 3, part 11. ZCL, at ZZS's command, goes to bed. The boy goes to bed fully dressed. ZZS, outraged, tells the boy that he doesn't even take his clothes off to sleep. ZCL, surprised by the reprimand, gets out of bed. ZZS asks him if he's ashamed to undress in front of him. ZCL doesn't answer, so ZZS says fine and turns away from the boy. After a while, he asks what's up with the boy in the morning, who, hearing this, gently touches the wound and shakes his head. ZZS adds that ZCL doesn't have to tell him if he doesn't want to, and takes out a box of ointment from hiding, explaining that it stops the bleeding and that he should put it on. ZZS, sighing, goes to the table and picks up the clothes. Before ZZS leaves, ZCL thanks him. In the room, the boy unzips his clothes and we see traces of blood on his right side of his stomach on his clothes and bandage. After a bath and changing into new clothes, ZZS goes down to the ground floor of the inn. He looks a bit different in a clean, light robe and neatly combed hair. Downstairs at one of the tables sits WKX and drinks alcohol. After a while, he notices ZZS who looks great in pastel blue robes. WKX tells ZZS that fate has brought them together and asks if it could be a tragic fate. ZZS stands in silence and, sitting down, replies that it is rather a cursed soul that is attacking him. Pouring himself some alcohol, ZZS asks WKX why he has been following him all this time. And he adds why WKX won't tell him that. WKX replies that he wants one trivial thing, he wants ZZS to show him his true face, then he will tell him. ZZS smiles and replies that maybe WKX will show him his true face first. WKX says that ZZS's true face must be really handsome, and when it comes to his true image, he is not necessarily handsome. Maybe he is covered in scars, or maybe he looks terrible. ZZS states that he does not care. However, he has one piece of advice for WKX, that he should not concern himself with matters that do not concern him. Undeterred, WKX turns to ZZS and asks him what is his connection with ZCL and asks if he wants to get into trouble without knowing what it is about. ZZS calmly replies that he will do his best to fulfill the mission entrusted to him. He only has to take ZCL to ZJ. The rest has nothing to do with him. ZZS knows that the boy does not trust him, but he still wants to help him and gives him the medicine. ZZS guesses that there is more to the attack on the ZCL sect than just a simple Ghost Valley attack. However, he does not want to deal with it. A bath and a change of clothes seem to have improved ZZS's mood, but he is aware that he will have to face WKX. The stubborn second man does not give up easily. ZZS takes the opportunity to once again want WKX to tell him the truth. WKX does not want to reveal his identity, but cautiously says something about himself. ZZS feels a bit trapped, but does not show it. Here we have another verbal fight between ZZH and GJ, I would really like to hear their real voices, it would be an extraordinary experience.

[the-himawari]

A3! Utsuki Chikage - Translation [SR] Festival of Blooming (2/2)

*Please read disclaimer on blog

---

Itaru: Here you go.

Chikage: …

Itaru: So dirty. Is this actually washed? …Can you stop giving me that look? They’re freshly washed. Rest assured.

Chikage: I’ll borrow them for a second then.

-pause-

Chikage: Heh, they’re comfortable. These clothes.

Itaru: Is this how a kid feels when they lend their clothes to their parents…

Chikage: Oh, right. I’d like to borrow a controller.

Itaru: Well, I do use those. Here you go. It’s okay if this one breaks.

Chikage: I’m not going to act that violently. Or perhaps I should exaggerate my acting a bit?

Itaru: Please put a cap on it.

Chikage: Understood. Alright, I’m starting. “Ha? Time out? It’s a Friday night, there’s no way nobody’s on. Damn normies enjoying their lives.” “I’m gonna banish you shitty small fry to the shadow realm.” “Rip in peace in pieces.”

Itaru: (That’s probably me when my match up isn’t going well, or when I'm pissed off because I can't beat a lower ranked opponent…)

Chikage: “Hell yeah! You really thought, huh? Trash.”

Itaru: (Wait, this trash-talking vocabulary…!)

Chikage: “Ah, senpai came back without me even realizing, huh? GJ with the corporate slaving.” “Woah, it’s already 2AM…”

Itaru: (Here’s the turn of events I hate… It’s me when I’m torn between sleeping or eating, but I’m doing neither.”

Chikage: “Should I have some ramen? Do you want some too, senpai? I’ll share.” “Eh, clean up my garbage? Of course I will.” “Tomorrow or the day after that.” And scene. That was typical Chigasaki. What do you think?

Itaru: …It was good. I’m not aware of my typical movements or facial expressions. But I just naturally accepted that was me.

Chikge: Good to hear.

Itaru: That’s why I have mixed feelings though. When I'm shown my undisciplined self objectively, it’s not that… I don’t feel sorry or a little ashamed.

Chikage: Do you understand what I’m trying to convey to you?

Itaru: “Re-evaluate how you live”, right?

Chikage: You’re not wrong. But I’ll give you 40 points.

Itaru: Here comes the sudden scoring system.

Chikage: Even you yourself feel ashamed of your lifestyle… But, even so, I have never thought I wanted to switch rooms. To my great surprise.

Itaru: We all know that’s a lie.

Chikage: I’m not counting the times it’s merely crossed my mind. You can say what you feel out loud. And you can relieve your stress and lift your own spirits by creating a space to release your emotions… I think that’s one good thing about you that I don’t have. I wonder if that means in a way, I envy you.

Itaru: —.

Chikage: Of course I do want you to improve and fix your lifestyle.

Itaru: That stings.

Chikage: In any case, you can just stay as you are. Surprisingly, I don’t dislike seeing you being so free, Chigasaki.

Itaru: Seriously?

Chikage: Probably.

Itaru: Probably? Well… thank you. I look forward to continuing living together.

Chikage: I’ll be in your care.

Itaru: Shall we take the instant photo now? I’ll leave the pose to you.

Chikage: Understood.

Itaru: Here goes. 3, 2, 1—.

*click*

Chikage: What do you think? I tried to be you.

Itaru: 82 points.

Chikage: I feel like I just barely achieved an “A” rank in this minigame of dodging-the-question.

Itaru: Oh, that’s my roomie for you. Correct.

Chikage: By the way, I ate this to prepare for my role.

Itaru: Oh, that’s the cup noodles I like.

Chikage: You told me it tastes good when it’s a little soggy, so I made sure to leave it a little longer before I ate it.

Itaru: It was good, right?

Chikage: 35 points.

Itaru: That’s the lowest score of the day…

---

previous |

[mllelaurel]

My Shard read proceeds apace.

“What in the Nine Hells is a Drizzt?” - The best line of dialogue in the entire series has arrived. All other dialogue can pack up and go home. 

And then, Dwahvel’s like ‘oh yeah, it’s your murder crush. The guy you wouldn’t shut up about for a year. I can’t expect to keep ‘em all straight, you know.’ 

-

Sharlotta’s narrative continues to not impress me. Let her be competent at something she’s supposed to be competent at, instead of being batted around by every guy she interacts with. 

-

Ooop, there’s the part that mentions Kimmuriel and Rai-guy being roommates (Oh my God, they were roommates! ...I am not original.) And I think that’s the same chapter which has one of them just casually refer to the other as a friend in POV. Which I gather is a heck of a thing, given the society they grew up in. 

I’m wondering if part of how the Bregan D’aerthe works. Mostly what we see of it in this book is petty bitch infighting, but I can’t help thinking there’s a certain defiant and - basically queer for its origins - camaraderie to it, without which the troop would have fallen apart a century ago. Caring about others is transgressive, and that transgression is part of the appeal. 

-

I really wish I could do even the most basic animation, because every time Jarlaxle interacts with the Crenshinibon, all I want to do is set it to this clip from Beetlejuice the musical. 

(I found my frequency/Crystals speak to me

What are they saying?

Buy more crystals) [Insert picture of a second tower here]

To be clear, I can’t even draw a satisfying stick figure, let alone animate fuck-all.

-

Oooh, there we go. The Entreri vs. Jarlaxle fight and Jarlaxle and Entreri vs Kimmuriel and Rai-guy when they arrive is genuinely gripping. There’s a really good balance of tension and fun (beat the hell out of your friend vs. throw a giant bird at the guys trying to coup you, GJ Jarlaxle), and I couldn’t help but notice a lot of the stiffness in the writing falls away. I’d wager Bob had fun writing it.  

Okay, let me actually unpack Jarlaxle’s different approaches to the two back-to-back fights, because I think there’s something interesting here. 

You could just make the argument that Jarlaxle is being entirely hosed by the crystal in the first fight. And Crenshinibon is kind of one-track-minded and not very fun. Whereas by the second fight, Artemis has ganked the crystal, not that Jarlaxle knows it. 

But if you take the Cinnabon out of the equation, what you’re left with is, Jarlaxle expects betrayal but doesn’t take it well at all from someone he genuinely likes. As he seems to like Entreri. In contrast, I don’t get the impression he’s close to Rai-guy at all, and while he and Kimmuriel have the potential for closeness, even this early on, they are not there yet. Their betrayal is ‘sigh, intrigue has come upon me. Welp, that was inevitable. But you forget - I love a good challenge!’ Whereas Entreri’s feels like a genuine betrayal. So Jarlaxle goes dead-serious and deadly. 

-

Speaking of potential for closeness, from Kimmuriel and Rai-guy’s conversation immediately after, you can just tell that Kimmuriel gets Jarlaxle, the Bregan D’aerthe, and Menzoberranzan in a way Rai-guy explicitly does not. 

“We have to find them,” Rai-guy said a moment later. “I want Jarlaxle dead. How else might I ever know a reprieve?”

“You are now the leader of a mercenary band of males housed in Menzoberranzan,” Kimmuriel replied. “You will find no reprieve, no break from the constant dangers and matron games. This is the trapping of power, my companion.”

Kimmuriel gets how the sausage is made. And we get our first hint of why he winds up half in charge of Bregan D’aerthe over the years. 

- 

Also speaking of closeness:

“[Entreri] could easily [escape] alone, he knew, and he had the real Crystal Shard, but for some reason he couldn’t quite understand, and didn’t bother even to think about, he turned back and grabbed Jarlaxle again, pulling him behind.”

Entreri, you dense-ass tsundere. 

-

I would also like you all to know that I just retyped both those passages. Because I can’t make copy-paste from an Overdrive e-book work. Faaaaaail. 

[ammg-old2]

Our universe is full of other worlds, orbiting their own suns. For most of human history, this was just an assumption, not a fact; astronomers could only peer through telescopes at distant stars and daydream about the planets that might be hiding in their glow. But then, about 30 years ago—quite recently, when you consider how long humans have been gazing at the skies—the cold, hard data appeared. Astronomers began to detect the signals of worlds beyond our solar system—just a few at first, and then, as more sophisticated instruments became available, hundreds and hundreds. And now, according to NASA’s numbers, the count of confirmed exoplanets in our Milky Way galaxy has surpassed 5,000.

The space agency announced the addition of 65 newly confirmed planets to its archive this week, bringing the current tally to 5,005. “It’s very hard to find these things, and for hundreds of years, people tried,” Jessie Christiansen, an astrophysicist at the NASA Exoplanet Science Institute at Caltech, told me. “I worked on four different exoplanet searches before I worked on one that was actually successful.”

Scientists have observed enough exoplanets to glean some intriguing insights about the cosmos. Nature, it turns out, is capable of producing all kinds of worlds. Exoplanets are tinier than Mercury and double the size of Jupiter; ice-cold and scorching hot; rocky, with some kind of surface; and gaseous, with clouds all the way down. There are planets around the star closest to our sun, just 4.2 light-years away, and planets around stars a couple thousand light-years away. Astronomers can confidently say, based on what they’ve found so far, that our Milky Way galaxy must have more planets than stars.

But the animating force that underpins this entire search—finding life on another planet—has still gone unfulfilled. Astronomers have found rocky exoplanets about the size of Earth, and some of them reside in the habitable zones of their stars, where conditions are just right for liquid water. But no one has yet discovered evidence of life in another planet’s atmosphere, nor detected radio transmissions wafting from the direction of a distant world. Astronomers can predict how many planets are out there, but they can’t say how many we’d have to find to discover another Earth or a sign of extraterrestrial life. Even with more than 5,000 other worlds in the books, it’s still just us. In fact, scientists could find 5,000 more exoplanets and we might be exactly as alone as we are now.

The first known exoplanets were detected in the early 1990s, using ground-based telescopes that could catch stars wobbling on their axes, a sign that a planet might be swinging around nearby. The field really exploded after a NASA probe called Kepler launched in 2009. From its perch in space, Kepler observed hundreds of thousands of stars, this time watching for tiny dips in brightness, a sign that a planet might be passing by, blocking the glow. Kepler, which NASA retired in 2018 when the probe ran out of fuel, facilitated the discovery of about two-thirds of the 5,005 known exoplanets.

Over the years, exoplanets have confused and delighted scientists. Christiansen can rattle off their names with ease, even though they sound more like serial numbers than alien worlds: HD 209458, HD 189733, GJ 1214. The abundance of hot Jupiters—giant, scorching worlds that circle their stars in a matter of days—upended traditional theories of planet formation, which didn’t account for such huge, gaseous planets cozied up to their suns. The discovery of systems with multiple planets suggested that our arrangement might be a common one. Some discoveries have felt simultaneously familiar and weird. Take, for example, the planets around a star called TRAPPIST-1, about 40 light-years away, which were discovered in 2017. There are seven, all about the size of Earth and rocky. But their sun is only the size of Jupiter, and a year on the outermost planet lasts just 20 days. This faraway system could, in theory, be home to something alive because three of its planets orbit within the star’s habitable zone. Astronomers don’t know anything about their atmospheres yet, but they’ll soon get a chance with a new NASA observatory, the James Webb Space Telescope, which could pick up on certain molecules that we know can be associated with life.

The search for exoplanets has allowed scientists to put Earth and the rest of our solar system in cosmic context. So far, what they’re seeing is that Earth is quite rare. We’ve yet to find a truly Earth-like planet: a rocky world about the size of our own, with a chemically rich atmosphere and surface temperatures that would allow water to stick around, lapping away, rather than boil off or freeze. But that hasn’t deterred alien hunters, especially those interested in finding evidence not of microbial life, but of advanced civilizations. Every time a star is found to have a planet, even if it’s nothing like Earth, astronomers at the SETI Institute aim their telescope antennas at the star anyway, just in case another planet is hiding in that system, broadcasting on a frequency we could catch. More exoplanet discoveries would give scientists more opportunities to do this kind of work, and new missions, including telescopes on the ground and in space, are expected to grow the inventory in the coming decades.

Could another 5,000 exoplanets, or even 10,000 or 20,000, bring us closer to answering that big existential question? That depends, and not on the size of the inventory or the sophistication of our instruments, but on the universe itself, and how common—or not—life is. “The more chances you have to roll that [die], the more likely you are to eventually hit upon a planet that has life,” Christiansen said. But scientists have no idea how many sides each die has. “It could be a 100-billion-sided die, and it literally only happens once, which is us, and we’re sitting here like, wait, where is everyone?” she said. “If it’s a million-sided die, you haven’t really increased your chances. But if it’s a 100-sided die, then you’ve given yourself lots of chances.”

Astronomers will keep searching for more exoplanets, driven by the belief that, in a galaxy this big, filled with so many stars and even more planets, life is more common than the current stats suggest. A decade from now, when Christiansen suspects the exoplanet community will double its catalog of confirmed finds, we may still be rolling the dice, over and over, holding our breath to see how it lands.

[how-do-i-delete-this-acc]

kenma + cuddles + stormy weather + only one bed

a/n: writing more comfort for myself bc there have been too many thunderstorms i hate this someone move me to antartica with the penguins and no thunder ALSO sorry if the grammar is wrong or smth i didn't proofread lol

you sighed.

"this sucks."

kuroo, the outdoorsy one of the group, decided that it would be fun to go camping. however, knowing that the two of you preferred the indoors and hated bugs, he decided to rent a cabin. (which was actually kinda sweet and considerate gj kuroo)

however, he made a little misclick and accidentally ordered a cabin with one bed. for the three of you.

so he called up the owners of the cabin and asked if they had any futons or anything, to which they told him to go buy himself a bed or a futon lol

so kuroo, being the prideful idiot he is, decided to drive AN HOUR AND A HALF back to civilization to buy 2 WHOLE ASS BEDS when it was 1am (nvm kuroo ur an idiot)

now, the two of you were stuck in a tiny little cabin that kuroo was going to jam TWO WHOLE BEDS in

tbh at this point u were ready to just SLEEP and kenma was literally melting onto the floor

buuuut there was only one bed and the two of you were too scared to sleep on it bc ur both v observant people and noticed that the other looked dead

so after these like rly awkward 15 minutes where there was no talking and no sound, you both sat on the couch (that literally felt like cardboard wtf kuroo) and you watched kenma play games on his game boy bc there was NO SERVICE and also you genuinely enjoy watching him play games bc he has the CUTEST EXPRESSIONS when he plays games

however, at some point, it started raining and you two got a text from kuroo

from 'rooster' to you and 'kenma':

The rain back here is rly bad so I have to wait it out. Be back tmrw :)

the two of you decided to suck it up after joking around and insulting him for a good 5 minutes (were ugs rly joking ?) and grabbed a blanket and sat back down on the cardboard couch.

you liked the rain. it was nice that there was more sound in the cabin that just the sound of buttons being rapidly pressed.

however, at some point, the rain turned into a thunderstorm.

you were terrified, to say the least. thunder has always been one of your absolute worst fears.

however, you didn't want to make a scene. especially not in front of your crush.

but ofc kenma being the observant man he is, noticed that you were gripping onto his shoulder a little tighter, and that you slightly tensed up whenever the thunder in the background roared. (for context you were holding onto his shoulder to see his game)

when he eventually came to the conclusion that you were terrified of thunder, he wasn't really sure what to do. comfort you? turn off his game? have you go to sleep? play some music? like what was he supposed to do

lucky for him, you figure out what he has to do for him. when a particularly loud and boomy thunder (they're all loud and boomy but this one was VERY loud and boomy) roars, you instinctively curl yourself close to him, eyes shut in terror.

he knows what to do now.

he turns off his game boy, sets it aside, and gently holds you close as he rubs your back.

"it's ok." he whispers soothingly. "it's all ok."

you're veryslightly embarrassed by the fact that you're literally curled up with your crush right now, but you don't really have time to think about the embarrassment with the thunder in the background

however, he provides you the sweetest comfort (contrary to my thunder comfort hcs lmao) and just wordlessly rubs your back and runs his fingers through your hair (bc he knows how good it feels lol)

his comfort is so nice that you end up falling asleep curled into him.

after your breathing steadies and he knows you're asleep, he lets his emotions show a bit more. the stupid smile that he's been biting back unleashes itself and finds its way onto his features. he gazes down at your sleeping figure, all curled up and snuggling into his chest, and feels his cheeks heat up a little. he lets himself drift of to sleep too.

you both end up waking up bc the couch is hard as cardboard about an hour later. he sighs and offers you the bed but you refuse immediately. the couch was uncomfortable af, the floor was worse and you were not about to let him sleep on it.

however, the same went for him. it would appear that both of you were incredibly stubborn.

kenma was the one to propose the "how about we both sleep on the bed? it's a queen so there'll be enough room.."

he may look calm and cool as ever when saying this, but if you look at his ears, they're bright red.

you nervously agree, and the two of you slowly climb into the bed.

the bed wasn't super comfortable, but it was much better than the couch. you slowly drift off to sleep.

you and kenma were both woken up at the same time by a rooster (not kuroo, an actual rooster) cock-a-doodle-doo-ing. when you opened your eyes, you were met with kenma's face about two inches from yours.

"AH!" you both screamed and tried to jump away, but couldn't. you looked down and realized that the two of you had intertwined legs and hands at night in your sleep.

to say the least, you were embarrassed. you could feel your cheeks burning up, and you saw kenma's ears turn bright red.

"uhm.." kenma started. "i.."

"I'M BACK!! D'YA MISS ME?" kuroo (the actual one, not his twin who woke u up)

you both whipped ur heads around and tried to untangle yourselves before he saw, but it was too late.

"oya?" (I NEVER PUT ANYTHING DOWN IN JAPANESE BUT IT JUST FELT SO APPROPRIATE) he had the biggest smirk on his face.

"ding a ling ling! whoa look at that i have a call be right back~!"

that cheeky brat.

"so, um, kenma.." you started, not really knowing what to say.

he cut you off. "how about we have this conversation after the trip is over?"

"yeah. lets do that."

the rest of the trip was actually decently fun, especially knowing that your crush liked you back and that you could look forward to that conversation after it was over. and as much as you hated to admit it, it was all thanks to kuroo and his idiotic brain.

[nullians]

It’s 3am and I want to stand on the roof and scream into this absolutely disgustingly pinkish/greyish sky that I want to be loved but alas, I live in a city and not the woods.

[deanwasalwaysbi]

“Let Me Call You Sweetheart” - Breakdown of the “Let's Misbehave” Dance Scene from Heroes’ Journey

Cas, as it turned out, was lamp.

“Let Me Call You Sweetheart” - Gene Kelly's iconic mop dance. Of course the difference between Dean Winchester and Gene Kelly is that Gene Kelly got to use an umbrella.

oh boy guys - strap in cuz we’re going to get deep into Old. Gay. Musicals. One of these references foreshadows Cas showing up in Dean's heaven. If they did that on purpose then I'm ready to Misbehave. 👀

TBC - the Entire sequence is about Dean wanting what Garth has but didn’t realize he could have with another Man, or with Cas. That’s not up for debate in this post. There is a long history of characters 'coming out' in dance sequences, and I can not divorce this in my mind from the fact that Mac from Always Sunny, a character that had been closeted nearly as long as Dean Winchester, had recently come out in a dance number (x).

Instead I’m going deep dive on the chosen music and the dance references. 

Let's Misbehave, Cole Porter, and Queercoded Innuendo

Let’s Misbehave was a gay anthem all about living outside the law written by Cole Porter, a gay man in a time when that was not a thing you were allowed to be. His work like I 'Loved Him (But He Didn't Love Me)' or 'I'm a Gigolo' ("a dash of lavender found next to a passionless dowager") is full of innuendo which is, in hindsight, extremely gay, but written ambiguously in ways that flew perfectly under the radar of censors at the time. His more famous musicals are still on Broadway regularly.  

In order to change up the pacing of some of his shows, the songs have been switched around somewhat.  “Let’s Misbehave” was actually written for the female lead in a show called Paris, where two characters who’ve been working together only now realize they are in love. I wonder whether people working on spn know that.

It was dropped from ‘Paris’ in favor of “Let’s Do It” (which the censors demanded be renamed, “Let’s Do It, Let’s Fall In Love” sure guys, you totally fixed it, GJ.)  35 years later it was added to the Second Act of the much more famous, “Anything Goes” where it joined songs with lines I know you will all enjoy such as “Baby, if I’m the bottom, You’re the Top.” More on Anything Goes at the end of the post. It's fun stuff, there's a lamp.

The Hays Office had a lot of issues with his titles, but ironically when they renamed works like ‘The Gay Divorce’ it became the infinitely funnier 'The Gay Divorcee'. Bigots not getting it: funny for 100 years and counting. 

Dance Breakdown

Garth and Dean start dancing in white tuxes with straw hats and canes which could reference any number of B&W old movies. Dean is learning from Garth how to dance, copying him.  Just like Fred Astaire's call and response solos in Top Hat White Tie and Tails which has this lil move. (This one is fun for the audio Astaire adds with the cane.)

then Dean goes to throw his cane and his partner is missing - he isn’t there. 

Eright - now this part - this part I want to be wrong I really do.  I really do. Now tell me this show is not referencing the one time Gene Kelly and Fred Astaire danced together when they have Dean and Garth dance together. TELL ME. 

Because here’s the thing about this number.... the one time they danced together it was to the ‘The Babbitt And The Bromide’, a song where two men repeatedly meet, beat each other up, dance together in close embrace, and then separate for decades. “they both were solid citizens they both had been around” they spend their lives with their wives, and then they meet again in heaven ..... sigh.

“A harp each one was carrying and both were wearing wings, and this is what they sang as they kept strumming on the strings, You've grown a little stouter since i saw you last i think, Come up and see me sometime and we'll have a little drink” (x)

Gunna be honest. I had never once thought about the lyrics of this number before. So did the spn writers? Or were they just referencing the famous dancers? Because if it is on purpose, which is a BIG if, but if they thought about it and it's on purpose? ... Then it foreshadows Castiel in Dean's heaven in the finale. I'm going to keep going, but that is absolutely the headline.

(This is actually not the first time we've seen Dean do that little heel click move. It appeared in season 6 so Jensen has had it under his belt for awhile. I just enjoy that fact.)

There is Dean doing that dance without a partner by his side. So next Dean makes like Gene Kelly - and he finds one. See the Lamp vs Mop Gifs at the top of the post. That's Gene Kelly dancing with a mop to “Let Me Call You Sweetheart”, something we all know Dean Winchester never says and certainly has never called Castiel.  (x)

When he’s done, Dean blows a kiss at the lamp and moves on with his dance reference tour.  Dean taps up the stairs in a likely nod to Bill 'BoJangles' Robinson, the highest paid black actor or performer of his time, famous for his stair tap dance. (x)

Back to the history of ‘Let’s Misbehave’ for a second. In '72 it was used in the opening credits of the movie ‘Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex* (*But Were Afraid to Ask)’. Then in '81 Christopher Walken strip tap danced to it on a pool table surrounded by women and photos of nude women until he revealed a giant tattoo of a heart on his chest in ‘Pennies from Heaven’ (x). So of course that's the very thing that Dean does. Well, the tap on the table, not the stripping. 

The dance he does up there is almost a cross between a tap and a Charleston, the signature dances for the time and used in Anything Goes.  It's also vaguely reminiscent of a dance Fred Astaire did in Swing Time that would only be called an homage to Robinson if we're being extremely generous to Fred Astaire.

Jensen ends on a sequence of tap I find extremely impressive at its speed for someone who only learned for this very dance, and I just want to recognize and give cred to it.

It's not specific enough choreography that I have placed it to any one dancer or dance yet, just presented with skill. I know there are more references & nods, including the little cane hop at the beginning, so if anyone picks more out I will be editing the post.

Anything Goes - keep reading

Like SPN, 'Anything Goes' a show that people think of as lighter fair, a guilty pleasure - pulp - not much meat there. It’s easy to digest for a general audience that isn’t reading too much into anything... but try telling that to the people analyzing it... 

Anything Goes was the first successful Broadway musical comedy to build a story on two threads of pointed cultural satire, apparently. It was riske for the time. The show includes the “yes they really did put that on stage in 1927″ song lyric “If love affairs you like with young bears you like....”  and yes, that meant the same thing then.  

because I know this fandom, The show also includes the song “Blow Gabriel, Blow,” it’s all about sex, but is disguised as a religious hymn about the book of revelations, and it's set to Jazz [the devil’s music] and ‘is about’ praying to an archangel to blow his horn and bring the end times already, because we’re already living through the apocalypse:  Enjoy some famous lines  (x): 

"I've been a sinner, I've been a scamp, But now I'm willin' to trim my lamp” ;

“Once I was headed for hell, Once I was headed for hell; But when I got to Satan's door I heard you blowin' on your horn once more, So I said, "Satan, farewell!"; & “'Cause I've gone through brimstone, And I've been through the fire, And I purged my soul, And my heart too, So climb up the mountaintop, And start to blow, Gabriel, blow”

Remind you of any boys we know?

So, like in any spn analysis, the question becomes, "What did they do on purpose and what was an accident?"

Did they purposefully pick a gay song by a gay man?

Did they know about the original intended plot of the song?

Do they know about the duel nature of Anything Goes?

Did they just pick random famous dance numbers to reference or did they pay attention to lyrics and subtext?

Lamp. I'm just going to write lamp here

The episode was written by Andrew Dabb and directed by John Showalter, these questions keep coming up with the two of them. That being said, clearly the whole sequence was choreographed by someone else, and that someone else was Gordon Hart (x), who is, according to his instagram, married to a man. I don't know about you, but if that Babbit & the Bromide stuff is on purpose, I am also ready to Misbehave.

In this case Cas was quite literally Lamp.

[zhongwans]

I really don't know how to explain my question, but in your opinion, what is the most iconic and/or craziest thing that the WOH cast did that might not seem like something big, but if you really look at it, it's like, huh? I'm sorry I can't word it better😭

HAHAHA OKAY there's honestly so much to choose from but the best one for me will always be Huang Youming's song choice during day 2 of the concert. It's really great because it has layers, okay. So much layers. Unless you have been in this hellhole from the beginning, or at least up to date with everything that went on since May 2020, the real significance of that song will probably fly over your head 😂

CP/RPS marketing is a thing in c-ent, and that's how actors who star in danmei become famous, though it depends on the production and also the actors if they want to take that route. The casting of WOH was not well-received because people didn't think GJ and ZZH would work as an onscreen couple, and both (especially ZZH) were known for not doing fanservice with their previous onscreen pairs. This naturally meant that fans who are into RPS turned away from the show and focused their attention on other danmei productions. So in the beginning it was just novel fans like me and GJ/ZZH's solo fans. There were no shippers. It was fairly chill.

But all that changed during July 20, 2020 aka what we now call the "Rainy Night". It's when ZZH posted a picture of himself inside an RV with the caption: 一场雨把我困在这里 "A bout of rain trapped me here,"

The caption is lyrics from 六月的雨 by Hu Ge, a love song. Prior to that, GJ also posted a video of him filming the storm outside and you can hear ZZH calling out to him from far away. The "rainy night" posts, especially ZZH's, spawned a lot of speculation. People dug up GJ's cooking vlog that was filmed in his RV and saw that the upholstery matched the one in ZZH's photo and that the ones in ZZH's trailer were different. You could say that at that point, nobody cared what people had to say about the casting because fans were too busy zooming in on whatever RV pictures they could find.

Basically the accepted "theory" at that time was that ZZH took shelter from the rain inside GJ's trailer, and GJ also went in after filming that video he posted. This was basically the birth of the LLD fandom 😂

But it was mostly just the fandom having fun. All that theorizing and speculating never goes anywhere and in the end, it's just something that you never really know the truth about. So it was chill. Very chill. But then WOH aired and GJ himself talked about the rainy night during an interview and confirmed that ZZH really did go inside his trailer during a storm.

So naturally, everyone lost their damn minds. The newer fans were screaming at us, asking what the hell was going on. It's just hilarious because nobody expected confirmation in the first place, and if it did come, people thought it would be from a leak or an insider or whatever. But nobody expected Gong Jun himself to bring it up unprompted during an interview!

And on the second day of the concert, Huang Youming chose to sing "A Secret That Cannot be Told" for his talent. On the surface, it just seemed like a cheeky reference to the censored romance in WOH, but it was actually something for the fandom. You can see ZZH and GJ trying to stop HYM from singing. Then ZZH insisted twice that he should "Start singing from the chorus, and not the first verse," like he knew exactly what HYM was planning to sing. Sure enough, HYM ignored him and didn't start at the chorus. The lyrics he started with were: "What's most beautiful is not the rainy sky, but the eaves that sheltered you and I from the rain"

Ever since HYM brought up the colander joke in his douyins, we already knew that the cast was more or less aware of our fandom shenanigans, but this just confirmed that they knew about the rainy night "theory" as well, and that worst of all, GJ and ZZH also knew about the rainy night theory and were being teased by the cast members about it.

All I can say is...sorry GJ and ZZH 😂 They ended up suffering from the cast's merciless teasing because of the fandom having fun.

[jeriafterdark]

General thoughts on 813 so far, aka my musings on ZZH and mindfulness tips

Feel free to skip bc this doesn't contain much new information lol.

On the topic of the recent slanderous article

As of May 25, 2022, ZZH's name is still being smeared, this time from a government news outlet. I won't mention what was in it because it's just more vague slander anyway, and who really needs that?

The author of said article, however, has been shown to be one of CAPA's cronies and has published these highly biased articles before. So does he really represent the government's view of ZZH? I don't really know. But it adds to my assumption that there are many hands in the CN government fighting for dominance/relevance. As much as the CN government likes to emphasize their unity and single-minded party values, I highly doubt it is as unified as we think. As with any government on the face of the earth.

Of course with any outlet continuing to slander ZZH, it comes with a lot of anger. Justified anger. So it was nice to see/hear other people in this fandom expressing their anger at the situation, just to know I'm not alone in cussing it out. The recent twitter space hosted by bluebirdmuppet was a nice thing to listen to :)

2. Helplessness and fan wars

I know a lot of fans have left this fandom because of the extreme toxicity, and the devastating events unfolding from 813 and beyond. And it's fine to leave, as I always emphasize. But I'd like to add a reminder: you're never as helpless as you think. You control your own thoughts, your own reactions to those thoughts, your own reactions to media, and you control the power you give them. Whether to give them the power over you, or to use your precious time and attention for other means. To center yourself again, and then affect change.

As someone who's had to study a lot of cognitive-behavioral therapy, in terms of my own anxiety and intrusive thoughts, it works like this:

You have a thought - it could be a full sentence, a fragment, or a mental image. Let's say it's "how unfair it is for ZZH right now."

Then a feeling - more importantly, it's not the emotion, like anger. It's your reaction. Your heart racing, blood pounding in your ears, tension in your muscles. It can leave you feeling very tired, fatigued. Especially after thinking about how unfair ZZH has been treated.

Then a behavior - You might avoid social media for the day, or treat yourself to some bubble tea, or quit the fandom altogether. Or it could make you desperate and start to believe in the ZSJ conspiracy.

At every step, if you give yourself five minutes to breathe, you can stop yourself from going down a bad negative feedback loop. I think it's normal actually for most people to have the thought > feel stressed > have a nice bubble tea to relax lol. And that's not bad! Some people might practice avoidance to spare their mental health. But it doesn't solve the problem, imo. Some people use their behavioral step to buy GJ merch, or do retail therapy. And that's good too, within your means of course.

I personally feel very sad if all of ZZH's fans turn toxic, or give into the negative feedback loop and participate in damaging behavior (to him and themselves). And also if when ZZH does come back, and I believe he WILL, that there won't be many fans left to support his comeback. That's what concerns me.

So! Here are just some mindfulness tips. The next time you feel a bit sad about the news or overwhelmed (being someone in the USA, yes the gun violence that has happened in the span of one week is horrific), try these things:

Give yourself five minutes to just breathe and take in how you're feeling. Just note that your heart is pounding, that things feel kind of eh. No need to judge yourself for it. Just feel it and let it pass.

Then ask yourself, what happened? Just the facts. Ex. saw an article with some bad news today.

Then ask, what kind of reaction did you have or are you having? Ex. I feel like my heart is beating faster.

Focus on the present moment and focus on how you're feeling physically.

Decide on a behavior. Ex. I'm going to take a walk, or I'm going to listen to some soothing music.

Come back to the topic at a later time when you've calmed down and just take note of the facts, that's all.

I think with the super fast pace of news nowadays, it's very easy to become overwhelmed with hate and spite and sadness. But I want to emphasize that your ultimate power is yours and yours alone. You can choose how to react and what behavior you want to take. And then another step. And another step. It's okay to feel kind of sad and sullen about it, but it's cool that you have the power to slow yourself down. And then speed yourself up when you're ready.

You gotta believe in your own power, or else who will?

More resources on Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy

Practicing Mindfulness

[joylinda-hawks]

I didn't think I would die this way. WOH, episode 6. WKX runs out to the courtyard where the coffins are. It turns out that something is trying to get out of the coffin. ZZS soon shows up and finds WKX laughing. WKX tells ZZS that they can't lock him in a coffin and they shouldn't talk about ghosts at night. ZZS knows that WKX is under the influence of drugs. ZZS grabs WKX's arm and a ghost jumps out of the coffin and looks closely at the two men. After a while, he says that the drug was useful and instructs the puppets to kill the intruders. At the sound of the bell, puppets come out of the coffins. WKX looks at them and says that they are dirty and smelly. ZZS is silent and the puppets come closer. ZZS begins to fight them. WKX just stands and watches. ZZS goes into a coughing fit, but continues to fight, shielding WKX with his body. WKX hugs ZZS, calling him mama and asking him to give him a piggyback ride. He says that ZZS has a nice back. An irritated ZZS wants WKX to wake up and cuts his arm with a sword. WKX is surprised and ZZS throws him away from where the puppet attacks. The ghost instructs the puppets to move, and ZZS falls attacked by the puppets. Despite this, he fights stubbornly while lying on the ground. The ghost stubbornly wants to kill them. ZZS is surprised by the strength of the puppets' attack. ZZS says to himself that he didn't think he would die this way. After a while, he notices that some force has thrown the puppets away. WKX looks at ZZS with a smile, fanning himself, then turns around and throws a fan at the ghost, killing it. A box lands in his hand and WKX looks at it carefully, saying it's interesting. ZZS, still lying on the ground, calls WKX, who is happy that ZZS addresses him in this way. ZZS calls him an asshole, WKX walks over to him and helps him up. The puppets also get up from the ground and get ready to attack. WKX grabs ZZS's arm and lifts them both into the air. This is the final part of a longer scene in the funeral home. Here, I think, we see WKX for the first time in killer mode, which turns on when someone wants to hurt ZZS. GJ showed it expressively. I love him for this expression on his face. This gives us a clear message that WKX cares about ZZS. On the other hand, WKX wants to protect his secrets, so it kills the ghost. ZZS does not hesitate, he fights with puppets to protect his life and the life of WKX. He wants to discover where and how WKX learned his real name. This scene also reminds me of what a fantastic person ZZH is. We know from BTS that he taught GJ what part of this scene should look like - it was really cute. I think GJ appreciated his teaching.

[jjheejz]

What is Fate?

[Part 5/5] WOH concert and after

WOH Concert (3-4 May 2021)

- The fact that they even have a grand scale wedding ceremony drama concert

- GJ did not attend ZZH's first solo concert, but both of them have their own concert together for the first time

- Chinese have a traditional tradition of calculating auspicious dates (metaphysics). It can be calculated commonly for when to move in to a new house, bury a deceased, open a business, hold a wedding etc. 3 - 4 May were auspicious dates for Wedding and marriage registration.

- The concert was held at a stadium in Su Zhou, but the entire city was blatantly supporting everything and anything about WenZhou like it's New Year's Eve. Eg. Building, helicopter banners, bus advertising, drone show, lantern display, subway endorsement, city's official account using WOH quotes applying to safety regulations, curated photo booths, life sized figurine of WenZhou (YouKu kept it as prideful display at their office entrance after the concert), crowds of fan support and cheers etc.

Drone show snippet:

- Both of them were given the center of attention for the entire 2 days of WOH concert. It was WenZhou/JunZhe concert in disguise as WOH concert.

= This gave them both the opportunity to show what they feel for each other openly (whether as WenZhou themselves or as JunZhe)

- To have a stage to be what they are* and have fun, while being accepted and greatly supported by a sea of Mountain people (山人), no matter how one sees it, it's an extremely touching form of support for them

*Disclaimer: obviously they weren't 100% themselves, mindful of the fact that this stage was monitored by important media bodies (not exactly sure what kind, but somewhat government-ish regulators I presume), but their gaze and body language is just as natural as what they are.

= The fact that the country in general is not open to this kind of relationship, yet they were in a place where most of the people were supportive.

- Yes, there were some important bodies (or eyes) during the 2 days concert. Which was why all the actors and actresses were warned. For whatever reason they chose to continue in their own way, it's daring consensus of support. And for whatever reason the regulators didn't do anything (there weren't any big news at all from them), is also a miracle.

- They had the opportunity to sing a duet on stage, live. For the audience, GJ's singing skills started from November 2020, ZZH likes GJ's singing, and 5 months later, they have a duet on stage.

- Official acknowledgement of cpfans

= First in history where the recognition was officially verbally mentioned in-person. You can say this fate belong to the fans.

- ZZH had the opportunity to vow a promise to GJ witnessed by X million of people in the stadium and those watching livestream, that he will always be there for GJ. He did not only vow as a companion to GJ, in ZZH terms, he actually vowed "I will love you forever" [ZZH on 'love' saga]

- The in-ear mic had the voices of the backstage crew's coordination. ZZH took it off early, but GJ was still wearing them during the exchange. That itself is a stressor as the backstage coordinator must have warned extremely sternly and loudly and GJ was shakingly nervous. When ZZH was giving this vow (which in the concert BTS release, we see him say "Don't I have a segment to speak to WKX?" Note, it's WKX, not GJ), the backstage crew was cursing and swearing when ZZH went with "I have things to say to Jun Jun." (as WenZhou, they have a disguise/a shield, with direct GJ, it's just...danger danger red light) Try imagine being the backstage crew and going all mad and crazy over what ZZH said that moment.

= ZZH's daring courage to say things like these was probably built up from his sportsmanship, hot-blooded passion from his past. It's beyond my peasant mortal's comprehension.

- Supporting Cast shenanigans and warnings for them, link here

After

- After the concert was over, solo fans expect the main leads to break up even as co-workers or say, being even in the same frame. This expectation is extremely strong in the industry for years. The same goes for JunZhe despite this time many are cpfans but they do know this prevalent expectation. So imagine crying over the vow and the next moment, just hours after the concert, JunZhe is happily sticking to each other singing in the same frame as if they did nothing big a few hours ago. They sang a phrase together with this lyrics: 30% arranged by fate/god, 70% arranged by hard work. A love for perseverance will lead to success/winning.

= Debunking expectations, breaking many years of industry's common consensus successfully. They invented after after-sales CP service.

- Stage, endorsements, film scripts, major public events, variety shows, top brands etc. Poured in, and although it's all solo events, we see traces of the other half.

- Aside from that, we now see social media exchanges (almost always for the other half), brand endorsement captions (almost always about the other half), official brands partnering with each other because of them (despite being legit competitors) etc.

- The word 'support' or at least 'love seeing them together', is the general reason CPfans are fans of them. But to both GJ and ZZH, it really goes beyond the word itself. Acknowledging is just the beginning. ZZH does take LLD to heart and GJ is very interactive with LLDs in his own quirky way.

*From the [Star X Moon Saga], to the developed feelings because of this drama and actually accepting their feelings, to the fact that the pitiful budgeted amount for WOH was not well received at all before it was broadcasted but boomed records in the end, to the open shipping support by the production crew/casts/general media/fans/brands/cities, to the climbing successes and mountainous opportunities opened for GJ and ZZH overnight, everything was unprecedented and unexpected, but they all dramatically happened to the two of them in a span of one year.

Bonus

A fan went to a temple to check out JunZhe's fate. You can only check for one person and she checked for GJ. She passed her result to a Master and he immediately tell her to give up because that person is taken and turned away. The fan quickly corrected and say she's actually checking for someone else, the master turned back and checked her read again and said, everything is aligned to their favour, it's blessed by the Gods. (If I can find the full article again, will add on more but that's the gist, surfing in China made me love Google's search engine algorithm so much more).

A few other fans who 抽签 (Chinese praying tradition - simply put: draw a stick of varying luck). They all got the bestest of luck for JunZhe. (Reading the readings, I'm just...in awe...I...)

= Borrowing the meaning of another famous novel title, to me, this is a true "Heaven's official blessing" pair.

-------End of series-------

🌻To returning readers: Updated info are in purple for your easy references!

🌸Part 1 - Before filming here

🌸Part 2 - During filming here

🌸Part 3 - After filming, before broadcast here

🌸Part 4 - Broadcast/Promotion period here

🌻Upcoming: JunZhe Saga series

🌻[Ongoing updates] Will add if I remember or found new ones - last updated 220721

🌻For long posts like this, I tend to look back for grammar and phrasing mistakes (sometimes info updates), so when you reblog for future references, do keep in mind that there may be updates in the original post! :)