#psylocybins
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Sex pollen fic but the characters do it recreationally, like psychedelics
(any number of participants, could be poly)
There's one sober person who ensures everyone gets a good experience
Someone complains about it not working right before the effect hits
The pollenned person gets a lecture on what they should expect
There's That One Scientist who documents everything and loudly announces which region of their brain is shutting down currently
Food is prepared in advance and it's honestly the best part of the experience
There's generally a Procedure and a Culture around it
The pollenned person gets handed sleeping pills if it's a bad trip
I unironically think it could be such a lovely setting for a very sweet and awkward kind of intimacy
#I'm currently living in a country where psylocybin mushrooms and other mild things are legal#so my lab's welcoming ritual is to feed newcomers mushrooms (you can refuse but it's offered and people normally accept)#(things you didn't want to know about scientists)#and while I found the experience itself somewhat underwhelming#the culture around it is very sweet#and I think it should be captured somewhere#also we have a mathematician in our lab who didn't react to a double dose of lsd#he just has this level of control over his own mind#lsd doesn't work on him#and I'm fascinated by it
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btw similar to the whole "if you try adderall at a party and it calms you down, get an adhd test" thing, if at some point in your life you try microdosing shrooms with a friend and end up feeling like a functional person for the first time in your life, get tested for depression. like yeah hallucinogens come with elation so youre probably gonna have some "this is the best ive ever felt in my life" vibes regardless, but like. if that in and of itself feels like finally breathing in for the first time in years, thats for sure a sign that something is up with your ability to process serotonin most of the time. feeling better than ever before should be a nice bonus, not a crushing weight off your chest
#fun fact there are currently multiple ongoing studies vis a vis the effectiveness of psilocybin on depression#both on its own and as a companion to ssris#psylocybin targets the 5ht2a serotonin receptors which wikipedia tells me are more numerous in the brains of those with depression#so like. if you spend most of your life feeling like your brain is an aquarium with a leak in it and serotonin is the water and your default#state is 'slightly damp gravel grinding painfully against itself' thats ummm not normal 👍#and on the flipside of that if you have depression that no other med has worked for and know a guy. its 1000% worth it#origibberish#also i say 'wikipedia tells me' as if i just looked it up but that all comes from a long night of spite filled research after i asked my#psychiatrist if we could use the fact that psylocybin worked for me as a basis to like. narrow down which legal antidepressant#might work instead of basically just throwing darts at a board every time#and after several minutes explaining to her that i was not just asking her to prescribe me shrooms but in a legal way she went#'ohhhh yeah no unfortunately theres been no research into that‚ yeah.... sorry......:)'#which. as far as 'lies you come up with on the spot to avoid having to say i dont know' go‚ that is. maybe the worst one to pick#like. 'no‚ thats not an option'? alright fine maybe theres some internal rules or something who knows#'theres no research' though just. immediately tanks any and all credibility 100% even on its own but considering the subject matter?#youre telling me. that humans. the famously curious species that researches fucking Everything. and also Loves playing with drugs. when#trying to figure out how to make drugs that make brains feel good. would not start with the drugs they already knew made brains feel good.#youre telling me that not one (1) singular scientist tried shrooms and went 'oh my god wait. i dont feel like im dying for the first time#ever. holy fuck i need to study this'#complete misplay. absolutely legendary fumble. there were so many ways to fuck it up and somehow you found the worst. congratulations#om the other hand though. really was an excellent setup for the punchline that is the voicemail i have from them saying she'd been fired LOL#they didnt say what for specifically but yknow. based on my own experiences i certainly have theories jebfksbfk#it was annoying in the moment but at the end of the day i have shrooms and she doesnt have the job so. whos laughing now emily KSBFKSBFKDN#this is what i mean though like. rn i feel fine. not on top of the world‚ not like a god#just. fine. i just dont feel like shit. i feel like i can do stuff if i want to‚ or chill peacefully and have it actually be. relaxing.#i dont feel like gravel right now‚ i feel like a person.#and god what a fucking relief it is#really i guess the moral overall is that if at any point you react to trying a new drug the same way an addict craving a hit for days would#then there maybe is something up with your brain chemistry because that means your default state of existence is comparable to that#of withdrawal. a famously shit experience
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society if Richard Nixon hadn't've decided to halt all research into the psychiatric effects of LSD and MDMA as part of his war on drugs in an attempt to impede the anti war and black liberation movements
#so many people would still be alive :(#its cured peoples addictions and ptsd ocd and depression and anxiety and greatly reduced symptoms even in those who werent cured#psylocybin and ketamine too. not to mention mescaline (the compound in peyote) which the nac literally calls 'medicine'#all my life ive been given genuinely dangerous medications and nothing has helped#and then i found put about the numerous wildly successful clinical trials on this stuff in the 50s-70s#which were entirely supressed by the government to make us believe these drugs are more dangerous than prescriptions when they just arent#how many people did Nixon and Reagan condemn to death with their war on drugs. this + over policing and incarceration...#hundreds of thousands of lives were probably lost or ruined as a result of their petty reactionary actions
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Psychedelika beweisen dir, dass es mehr als eine Möglichkeit gibt, die Welt zu sehen.
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Drug Education Essay
Big Small nerding out warning. 😅
When i first started smoking weed i was surprised how much bullshit I was told before, due to everything related to the war on drugs. So i started learning anything and everything about every major drug to learn about their effects, their dangers & how to consume them safely. I did this because i wanted to find out what drugs i would ever consider consuming, and even for ones i wouldn't, i wanted to know how to advise and/or assist people who would.
The following will be a long essay about some of these things, though since this a HUGE topic, i won't be able to cover all points i would like to by any means.
Safer use
To consume drugs safely with minimal risk it's important to balance 3 different aspects.
Set (Your mindset and general headspace)
Setting (Your surroundings/environment)
Dosage (Amount and method of consumption)
1. Set
The set refers to your mindset.
How do you feel mentally/emotionally?
Are things wheighing on your mind?
Do you feel stressed recently?
How do you feel physically? (tired, exhausted, strained, restless?)
Can your body deal with the drugs effects?
2. Setting
The settings describes your immediate surroundings while doing any drug.
Are you in a comfortable environment?
Are you with friends you trust?
Do you have someone with you who is sober, for whatever may come up?
3. Dosage
Dosage refers the amount of any drug you're taking. Taking multiple drugs at once often causes drugs to potentiate each other. If you think about mixing them make sure to check if they're compatible with each other. (https://combo.tripsit.me/)
Balance in All things
Imagine these 3 aspects as a triangle to balance out. When you have a really good Set & Setting, you may go with higher dose, but at the same time if either isn't stable, it may be a better idea to not take drugs today, or go with a low dose and go from there.
Trip Sitter
It's highly recommended to have a trip sitter with you, especially if you take something for the first time, or in high doses.
A trip sitter is someone who you trust, stays sober, can comfort people having a hard time, and deal with outsiders and situations that may arise related or unrelated to the trip.
On (https://tripsit.me/) you can find guides for tripsitting, as well as a webchat for when you may take some drugs alone, and you're looking for someone to talk to.
Drug Categories
Drugs can be put into categories of:
Uppers (e.g. Nicotine, Caffeine, Amphetamines, Cocaine)
Empathogenes (e.g. MDMA)
Psychedelic stimulants (e.g. 2C-B)
Psychedelics (e.g. LSD, Psylocybin)
Cannabinoids (e.g. Weed)
Dissociatives (e.g. Ketamin)
Downers (e.g. Alcohol, Benzodiazipines, Heroin)
Many drugs may overlap or cross the lines of said categories fluidly.
You can find detailed information about each drug in this amazing database by tripsit.me.
https://tripsit.me/factsheets
I'll try my best to describe these categories, but please forgive me that i often can't be as clear or explanatory as i would like to be, because most drug experiences are very unique, and it's kind of like a color you've never seen, music you've never heard and art you've never felt before, if you haven't experienced the drug, or group of drugs previously.
And even if you have substantial experience (pun intended) a difference in set, setting and dosage can have a big impact in shaping the journey in that instance. This Especially true for pychadelic-(like) substances.
Uppers
Uppers as the name suggests are substances that commonly make you more aware, awake, give you energy, and strengthen ego. Most ADHD medication also falls into this category like Methylphenidate (Ritalin), or Dexamphetamine (Vyvanse).
Most uppers can be strongly addictive though.
Empathogenes
Empathogenes are substances that strengthen your feelings of empathy, and allow you to connect and relate stronger to what other people feel, and allow you to handle your own feelings less inhibited, more clear, and decrease anxiety. Which makes MDMA, for example, great for therapy, which gets adapted by more and more countries nowadays.
Many of these work by making the body release a lot of happiness chemicals like Serotonin. Which can lead to strong hangovers the day after, especially if they're dosed too high. Imagine your "physical and mental batteries" being drained of their happinness hormones in a short period of time. They are often considered between psychedelics & uppers.
Psychedelics
Authors note: Honestly the hardest for me to describe, since they're a very special experience, and every time is different than the last. Psychedelics make you feel everything more intense and vivid. This ranges from body feel, to your thoughts. They decrease your own ego, which makes you able to deal with issues, and things weighing on your mind in a more objective way. This can also make some experiences quite difficult, because you may not be ready to accept certain things you learn about yourself. (E.g. i accepted on a very profound LSD trip that i am trans.)
Psychedelics don't cause a physical dependency, and psychological dependencies are very rare. Since these experiences are often very exhausting, making you want to take a break after consuming them. Most psychedelics like triptamines, lysergamides, and phenylethylamides cause a very strong tolerance in the body immediately after taking them.
So even taking them 2 days in a row you'll need quite a higher dosage to make them work at all, it is often said that after the third day they won't work at all though i can't confirm that since i have never tried that. It's also basically impossible to physically overdose on any of the common psychedelics, therefore there are no deaths directly related to psychadelics. (Assuming you get what you think you're consuming, which isn't a given in an illegal market.)
Psychedelic stimulants
The psychedelic stimulants are a mix of uppers, empathogenes & psychedelics. Which can give some very interesting experiences, especially eye opening ones.
They are often a bit easier to handle than the common psychedelics, but some can have some nasty, terrible, and dangerous side effects when overdosed.
Dissociatives
These are quite hard to describe as well. These substances dissociate body, mind, and feelings. They can lead to making you observe the situation like an outsider. Imagine it kind of like lucid dreams. Bodily functions can be inhibited, or even paralyzed. For example Ketamin is used as a narcotic.
One of the groups i personally have the least experience with to be honest, so i can't go really deeper in here, but they're also generally quite hard to describe, and have to be experienced.
Cannabinoids
Cannabinoids are the main psychoactive elements within the cannabis plant. (There are also synthetic cannabinoids, but we'll ignore them here.) There are hundreds of different cannabinoids in each plant making a unique feeling to whatever strain you might be consuming.
They can be generally organized into 2 groups.
Sativa
Indica
Sativa
Sativa strains are often stronger on the mind, than the body. They have kind of a psychedelic like effect, and mainly affect your way of thinking.
Indica
Indica strains refer to the classic body feel described with cannabis. The couch potato like feeling. Giving you a body high which makes you feel very comfortable, but also often not in the mood to move.
There are also many hybrid strains, and most of what you'd consuming will have effects of both.
Due to their varied nature cannabinoids are usually categorized as a mix of psychedelics & downers.
Downers
Downers are substances which usually have a regressive effect on the consciousness. Many substances here can lead to feelings of reduced inhibitions, self assurance & dreamyness. And some may lead to repressing reality. Imagine like alcohol drunkness, inhibiting certain bodily functions, reducing conscious inhibitions etc.
These often are also very addicting substances.
Below are 2 images from a german book i read many years ago, about many many different drugs & drug groups. Most of the knowledge here i also referenced from that book, since it has been hard for me to put all of this into words, and keep important points in mind.
The following image shows the different drug groups in a nice diagram for visualisation. The black bar between Upper & Downer is a strong seperator. So don't think these 2 groups are close to each other. From top left to bottom left: Upper, Empathogenes, Psychedelic stimulants, Psychedelics, Cannabinoids, Dissociatives, Downers.
Source: M3MORI3S: Erinnerungen eines Psychonauten - Nitemare (2015)
The second picture here is the same visualisation but instead of groups with different drugs. Even though it's in german, most of the substances have the same, or similar names in english.
Source: M3MORI3S: Erinnerungen eines Psychonauten - Nitemare (2015)
Thanks for listening to my Ted talk, I'll be here all week. This is one of my nerd topics, since i learned basically everything i could learn about this topic many, many years ago. And it's important to me to inform people, so they're able to consume drugs informed and safer.
Always be aware that every drug can be dangerous, and it's important to know how to consume a drug to minimize risks.
If you have any questions or just want to talk about this lovely hyperfixation of mine please feel free to reply or DM me.
Actually if you have read this far, please let me know i would love to know if anyone cares about my midnight ramblings.
Also thanks to @greenpanties for editing my infodump into something readably coherent. (Please help it's 1 am and I was not ready for Lily to do this)
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super sludgy perception test | psylocybin |
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I live in Europe so things are still somewhat liveable and ok atm but I just saw this documentary on the state of Oregon I think? Where literally every drug is legal and the whole time I was watching it, I couldn’t believe it was a real ass documentary and not some badly written horror movie. It’s so trippy to be born in 1998 cause you remember a time when life was normal and things were making sense. I mean yeah we had computers at home but they were for playing games and the most people had were msn and then came facebook. But now we’re basically living in a zombie apocalypse. Social media is rotting our brains and then we have the very real and very scary drug problems happening in so many cities I mean just look at the streets of New York or any other hcol area with legalized drugs is a nightmare. And I’m talking from a consciousness perspective not an “ew I hate homeless people” perspective.
People have lost their consciousness from this. No matter how you feel about psylocybin or any other “spiritual” psychedelic drugs the truth is that people are not using drugs responsibly. They are using cause life is unbearable. Life is not worth living. A part of me wants to get involved and think of a way to solve this problem but then a big part of me is telling me that life is not real it’s all just a figment of our imagination and that the game of life should not be taken seriously.
#conciousness#glow up#femininity#self care#girly blog#law of attraction#the void state#reality shifting#hypergamy#goals#dating and relationships
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*subtly slips a psylocybin mushroom into Obito's food.*
#Zetsu would do this for science and fun#evil plant#watch Obito have the worst experience because he doesn't know what's happening to him dibfejndjdnf
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> people experience ego death when on shrooms
> abusive parents are the most selfish motherfuckers on the planet
with my new business venture FamilyFungus i can solve the problem of mom acting like apologizing will send her directly to superhell. and my new kickstarter to fund one billion doses of psylocybin wi
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*guy who ate 14+ grams of psylocybin mushrooms at age 7 and is now 27 voice*
i wonder why im so mentally ill and schizophrenic🤔😨
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Spiritualität und Unterbewusstsein
C.a 5-6x pro Jahr konsumiere ich Psylocybinhaltige Pilze. Ich habe schon viele Erfahrung mit Psylocybin und mit dem Mischkonsum anderer Drogen machen können und taste mich immer wieder Dezent und vorsichtig dran.
Aber dieses Mal ist was passiert was ich noch nie erlebt habe. Ich habe wieder Psylocybin Pilze gefuttert und mir dabei noch eine Sahnekapsel gegönnt, das war nicht das erste mal und ich wusste was mich ungefähr erwartet, damit habe ich allerdings nicht gerechnet.
Wir wollten uns etwas trauen und haben den Ballon mit 1 1/2 kapseln befüllt... Es ist immer wieder dieselbe Reise, ich erlebe aufeinmal ein wissen an starken früheren Schmerz, an Misshandlung und schweren traumatas. Ich weiß nie was es ist aber ich spüre wie schlimm es gewesen ist, bis ein Gefühl aufkommt, dass ich dieses Gefühl loslassen muss um wieder in eine ausgeglichene Waage zu kommen und dann passierte es ich komme in ein Paradies, in den Himmel, ich befinde mich mitten im bunten Universum voller funkelnder Sterne und ich fühle mich so leicht. Und dann kam aufeinmal dieser Gedanke:,, bei Lachgas wird dmt ausgeschüttet, wie als wenn man stirbt. Heißt es also das wenn ich sterbe, dass ich diesen Prozess mit mache und dann hier hin komme? Hier in diesem Paradies wo ich bin, wo ich mich so wohl fühle und keine Schmerzen spüre, hier in meinen Paradies wo ich vor Freude und Glück strahle? Komme ich wirklich hier her. Dann ging alles von allein und es fühlte sich so schön an das ich dachte:,,Was wäre wenn ich noch paar tiefe Züge nehme? Darf ich dann für immer hier bleiben und ist es schlimm zugehen?" Und ich selbst antwortete mir selbst im Gedanken mit ruhiger und gelassener Stimme: ,,Also ich denke es ist inordnung loszulassen, für heute klingt es zu mindest so perfekt und so einfach. " Danach atmete ich noch paar weitere Züge ein während ich noch total benebelt war und hatte überhaupt keine Angst würde ich jetzt nicht wieder zurück kommen.
Später als ich wieder klarer wurde war ich sehr erschrocken über mein Denken und meine Gelassenheit gegenüber dem Tod. Wäre es der Tag gewesen, dann wäre es so und ich wäre ganz friedlich und gelassen eingeschlafen und in meinem Paradies wieder aufgewacht.
Jetzt möchte ich gerne eine Spirituelle Reise beginnen um heraus zufinden woher diese Schmerzen kommen und was mir so schlimmes als Kind passiert ist. Aus Neugier? Nein am liebsten will ich es nicht wissen aber ich glaube die kleine Sarah muss mal getröstet werden, aber dafür muss sie sich erst einmal zeigen.
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The red lights of Atlantis
I missed the train, of course, at some point it had to happen to me, I'm always late. I take the next train, I haven't slept more than 4 hours per day in almost a week, I thought I'd fall asleep immediately but did not happen, the journey reminded me of a movie a friend recommended to me once, I looked for the one but there was no French girl around reading a book nor a couple arguing in a foreign language, there is no Before Sunrise story for me in this train. Paris passed by, Brussels passed by, Rotterdam passed by, the train stops, I walked out the station, I almost get hit by a bicycle, two days ago I was almost hit by cars several times for looking left instead of right, British stuff.
I can barely walk, my feet hurt, I'm hungry, tired af, I manage to keep going, bykes, trains and weed everywhere, I need an energy drink, it tastes good, wait... I kinda feel strange, read the bottle... Contains Cannabis, nice welcome.
This is the perfect city for my photographs, but I just realized that I have hundreds of photographs from Rome, Athens and London, the memory card is almost full and my back is almost broken, the camera is too heavy to carry all day, I decide to leave it at the hostel, instead I will use the small analog Kodak H35N that I recently bought, there are only 3 shots left of the Cinestill 800t, I Google a photo store in the city, this time I will try the Portra 800. I don't want to spend a lot of time taking pictures, so just 72 shots, think fast and shoot fast, think fast, shoot fast, I repeat to myself.
I head to Kokopelli, a smartshop I read about, basically the psylocybin shop, turns out mushrooms are not legal in Amsterdam now, but these clever people offer truffles instead, which are also a mushroom, but this one grows under the earth, but as the store owner explains to me, a higher dose of truffles is required compared to the regular dose of mushrooms to perceive the effect. Like any other psychedelic substance or plant, there is a lot of variety and each one produces different sensations, some more visual and others more introspective. There's the Utopia, the Pandora, Mokum and Atlantis. I bought 15 grams of Atlantis.
While the Atlantis takes effect on me, I walk through the neon lights of Amsterdam, /think fast, shoot fast/ suddenly I have taken around 50 photographs and the effect begins to spread through my hands. I get into the red light district and put my camera away.
I always trust in the psilocybin to guide my journey, so I just go with the flow, whatever happens, happens. I saw a beautiful pier in the morning and I definitely want to capture it at night. As I walk, the effect of the truffle increases and I realize that I am getting a little stressed because I am constantly distracted by wanting to take photographs... Just that photo of the pier and I turn off the camera, {I think}.
I got to that point in the city, the pier is right on my left side, but I was amazed by what I saw on my right side. I turned right, still thinking that the pier will be my last photograph of the night.
The night is very cold, a while ago I stopped feeling my body, I don't remember feeling this level of cold before but I know I have to keep going, hold on a little longer, I tell myself.
As I walk my senses begin to alter, the colors seem different, the body feels lighter. I stop in the middle of the street, trains, bicycles, people and cars pass around me, I look up and there she is, bright and full, hidden behind a delicate fog, Full moon, its brightness is so strong that the night is no longer night, its light is reflected on the river, the water refracts the light and creates a kind of rainbow in the water. Everything around me is magnificent, I feel like I'm inside a movie.
And just after this thought, I see a girl on the other side of the street taking out her camera and preparing to take a photo of the same view that shocked me. And then I realized, that is the most perfect scene in this movie that I am experiencing, that is the composition of a perfect photograph, a lonely girl taking a photograph of the most dreamlike landscape I have ever seen. I rush to take out my analog camera to preserve that moment, (think fast, shoot fast), Fuck!!!!!, I can't move the film to take the photo, my hands are so frozen I can't move my fingers, I keep trying, the girl is still in the same position, she's taking her time, it's like she's giving me enough time to take her a photo, I try harder to turn the camera roll... FUCK!!! I broke it, I broke the gear, REALLY??? (think fast, shoot fast), my phone, take it with your phone, quickly take out my phone, now shoot... A train crosses right between that girl and me... NO WAY!!!. And then the most surreal thing happened, when the train finished crossing, the girl disappeared, the girl was no longer there, I looked around and there was no trace of her.
Somehow, synchronicity brought together two solitary photographers in Amsterdam in the middle of the night with a full moon, amazed by the same dreamlike scenario, but only for a brief moment, without knowing each other, not even a photography, the universe just allowed me to keep this memory in my mind.
Maybe that was my Before Sunrise story, maybe I'll have to come back to that exact point in Amsterdam in a year. (26/03/24)
[Psilocybin always shares wisdom and guides the path of your experience in the most spontaneous and unpredictable way, this time it showed me that I needed to be more present in the places I go, in the countries I visit, the moments I live, photography is not everything, I need to keep some memories only for myself, for the soul and not in digital format, the most perfect scene is not the one I captured in a photograph but the one I experience in person, the one I feel. Probably instead of wasting time trying to take a picture of that girl, I could have met her.]
Returning to the red light district, the atmosphere starts to feel different, the moon hides behind the buildings, the streets became neon alleys with music and people having fun everywhere, it feels like I'm entering into a cyberpunk world, this is my kind of world. I put on my headphones and play Goodbye from Kavinsky on loop. I dive deeper into this cyberpunk environment I'm walking through. So many different people on the streets, a homeless asking me for €2, a group of elegant girls dressed like top models singing Beyoncé, a bunch of college students acting and walking like thugs guys, an elegant man sitting on a bench in front of a neon Mexican Restaurant smoking marijuana, a bunch of dealers dressed all in black offering me cocaine, a trash can on the floor with all the trash around that for some reason catches my attention, and of course, the ladies behind the red lights, they smile at me, they knock on the window to call me but I just keep walking. On the way a specific line of red lights catches my attention, different from the others, it's a red tunnel under a house, let's see... DAMN!!!... black hair, white skin, long legs, half body tattooed, the Greek goddess I dreamed of, she opens her door and invites me in, her beautiful voice made me nervous, her beauty intimidates me, I didn't come here for sex, I have never paid for sex, I'm just looking, I think. Well, maybe I'll just ask her how this works...
-- €100 for 20 minutes, darling- She says... No, thank you (Greek goddess), bye.
Next to this red tunnel is the Moulin Rouge, a Club with hypnotizing red neon lights that say "EROTIC NIGHTCLUB" "LIVE SEX SHOW".
Personally, I have never liked these types of places, "Tables", where girls dance, get naked, offer company for drinks and of course, sex. In Mexico I never go to these places, but I thought... I'm in Amsterdam, the main experiences in this city are Truffles & Sex, legal "drugs" and legal prostitution.
An elegant man who was at the door of the Moulin Rouge approaches me, - Would you like to come in? Our next show is in 10 minutes, the last one of the night, the cost is €40 - .
Cash or Card?
—Card please.
...
Enter the void...
The entire atmosphere in this place is created to stimulate your senses to the maximum, the air is covered by a fine mist combined with green and purple phosphorescent lights, the aroma is something that I have never smelled before but it immediately gives me a pleasant and relaxing sensation, I'm on the highest effect of Truffle, so the experience is much better. I sit at the bar which is full of shiny crystal glasses painted by a hypnotizing pink light... - Do you want something to drink? - A glass of ice water, please. - The taste of natural water when you're under the psychedelic effects is one of the most delicious and simple things one can experience, so I really enjoy my glass of bright pink water. I've been here for 3 minutes, I'm delighted and the show hasn't even started.
A blonde girl dressed in an angelic futuristic dress enters the dance floor, just as the first beat of the music begins she jumps to the highest part of the pole, the way she moves and combines with the music is perfectly coordinated, that dance left me in awe and again, the show was just beginning. What I saw there was one of the most surreal things I have ever seen in my life, these people were professional artists, I never thought that through sex and sensuality it could be translated into art, an erotic spectacle at its finest. In this place, clients do not pay for a private dance or for sex, you are not here to put a dollar in their panties, here people come for an artistic show, here they applaud at the end of each act.
The show is over, and so the Atlantis effect, the last minutes of the psilocybin effect is my favorite part, when you don't feel the weight of your body, when you are as light as a feather, you don't feel tired or cold or hot, for a moment your physical sensations in the body fade away.
I head back to the hostel, I walk through the lonely streets of the red light district of Amsterdam at 3 am, everything is quiet, I only hear a duck swimming in the river and some crows in the trees. But suddenly... KNOCK, KNOCK! I listen... I turn my head and there she was again, the Greek goddess under the red light...Well I guess the night isn't over yet.
Her name was Atenea but she was Bulgarian.
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Interested in how this might will go. I’m in a pretty blunt kinda mood. I had an extremely enjoyable time with my son earlier. It was sorely needed, for us both. I need to not be such a shithead. But anyway that’s not what we are her to talk about.
So I didn’t really expect there not to be drugs when I got back and I was not disappointed when there were. I just don’t give enough of a fuck at the moment. I really just want to get left alone tonight so…. Anyway, I smoked a few hits of crack. Utterly unsatisfying and absolutely not worth a shit as I already know to be the case each time. So nothing there. Did pop a psylocybin capsule a short while ago. In the midst of shaving. Then I put on Pink Floyd. Needed to sit for a minute. But I gotta finish. Ta-ta.
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