#proud member of the fuck jimmy society

[blumingtoadstool]

Hey mouthwashing peeps.

Y’know how Anya stole and hid the gun when she realized she was pregnant? Straight up refused to tell Curly where it was bc she didn’t want Jimmy to know where it was and get a hold of it if/when he found out?

Remember how Jimmy stormed out of the med bay when Anya told him and Curly went to find him?

Remember where Curly found him?

He was outside of the cockpit doors.

He was either on his way to the utility cabinet to get the gun or already searched it and was about to go look for it when Curly found him.

So he knew the gun was gone and that Swansea had the axe, meaning the only two weapons on the ship were out of his reach.

He crashed the ship *after* he realized he couldn’t just kill Anya, he had to kill the whole crew. We know he crashed the ship so he wouldn’t deal with the repercussions of his actions, but holy shit.

Anya was scared he’d go ballistic and she was fucking right.

[schoolfullofmorons]

title: therapy

description: She sighed softly. "It sounds like you may be developing PTSD. Have you ever tried going in for a trauma screening?"

A sort-of sequel to cigars and constellations.

"You know, you probably could've gone to this thing yourself. I mean, haven't you like - I dunno, been to therapy, like, thousands of times at this point?"

Gary tore his eyes away from the window to stare at Pete, who had both his hands on the steering wheel of the car. The shorter boy had his eyes on the road, hardly paying any attention to his ex-friend. Gary took in a sharp breath in the back of his throat as he stared at Pete's collarbone for a long moment, then looked at his face again.

"Yeah. I mean, I guess. But it's been a few months since getting out of the asylum and- and I don't know. I just thought it'd feel less overwhelming with you here." Gary tried to ignore the way his heart clenched. "You didn't have to come."

Pete's face softened, and he glanced at Gary, his brown eyes reassuring. "No, no, it's fine. I was just curious, Gary. It's been so long, I don't really know how you think anymore."

As Pete's eyes returned to the road, Gary turned his face back out the window. This new therapist had been recommended to him by Pete himself, actually, after Gary and him had had a conversation on the dorm couch, Gary telling him all the things that had been going through his head recently. The office was outside of Bullworth by about ten miles. At first a lump had formed in his throat, wondering if it was possible for him to even do this. Gary had never been able to leave Bullworth unless it was with his family, and he knew his father would never approve of him going. It would ruin the family name, or something. Plus, Gary didn't have his licence. But Pete had offered to drive him once he noticed Gary's week-long hesitation, and now here they were, out on the highway in uncomfortable silence.

It was November, and truth was, Gary had been trying his best to avoid having to do this. His experience in Happy Volts Insane Asylum had terrified him. But with senior year came harder classes, not to mention makeup work due to skipping out on his junior year. Plus with his ruined reputation came constant bullying, both from peers and authority. He wasn't even gonna mention college applications. It was exhausting, and then it was overwhelming, and then it was too much.

"I guess I've grown a lot." Gary mumbled to Pete. "Still can't drive, though."

Pete laughed. "Yeah, I remember that horror story you told me about the DMV guy not letting you get your licence in like, what, tenth grade? I think it was sophomore year, anyway, before everything happened. You said you crashed the car."

Gary winced at the story Pete recited back to him. "Aha. Yeah. That was me."

Truth was, he hadn't crashed any car. He had run a red light, and then a stop sign, and his instructor had looked at him and asked for his mental health history. Already showing signs of impulsive behaviors and violent thoughts, they had contacted his current therapist at the time and they had agreed that Gary shouldn't be allowed to drive. Legally. Ever. He was too unwell for it. Gary remembered the disappointment on his mother's face when she had told him he had been declared legally insane, so much so that he wasn't allowed to be a functioning member of society.

Not sane enough to be independent, but sane enough to get punished like someone with normal needs, Gary thought to himself and glanced at Pete. He felt guilty that he had lied, but he wasn't about to apologize now. Apologizing now meant unpacking why he lied in the first place, and unfortunately that reason was that he had ugly cried in his father's convertible on their way home from the DMV. Too embarrassing. Maybe another time.

"Gary, are you sure you're ready for this? I mean, I know I left super early, so maybe we could get something to eat? I dunno man, you just- I just want you feel good about this. About reaching out for help, I mean."

Pete took in a deep breath and Gary turned to watch him as he talked. "Like, you've always kinda tried to reach out but everyone in Bullworth just fucking sucks so you always get shit on for it. Your therapists have always sucked, that asylum probably sucked, it all sucks. Bullworth doesn't care about you and I want to give you better but I need to make sure you're ready to receive better."

"Petey..." Gary mumbled, feeling overwhelmed from the emotions coming off of his best friend. Ex-best friend. Whatever they were now.

"I just want to make sure you're okay. So like, do you want McDonald's or not? I got paid today at my job, we can get a fry or something."

Gary felt a smile growing on his face, and he raised a hand to wipe his mouth, trying to hide it. "Yeah man. A fry would be dope."

Soon enough, Petey had turned into a McDonald's and parked the car. Before he knew it they were standing in line, and Gary was looking over the toys displayed for the kid's meals.

"When I was little I always wanted one of those stupid cars." Gary told Pete, pointing at the little toy truck they were selling. The line shuffled forward slightly, and Pete turned to look at him curiously. "My dad always said it was too childish, though. He wanted me to have books and fancy oldie movies such as Forrest Gump. Watching cartoons was for babies."

"Your dad's lame." Pete shook his head once, then twice. "Who could think that cartoons are bad?"

"I dunno." Gary laughed and bumped Pete's shoulder with his own. "I always, like, okay. Don't laugh at me for this, but I liked letting you pick movies, cause you'd pick Disney cartoons and they made me feel really happy."

"You always did like The Aristocats." Pete mumbled thoughtfully.

"I think I had a thing for Thomas O'Malley, in all honesty. Maybe I'm a closeted furry or something." He grinned and Pete rolled his eyes.

"I think you have a thing for himbos. I mean, you've had a crush on Jimmy for what? Months?" Pete laughed as Gary's face turned red, and he could feel his heart in his throat, thumping hard.

"Jimmy's... not my crush. He doesn't even- I mean, I haven't even- we haven't spoken, Pete." Gary mumbled in a low voice and his eyes burned as Pete looked at him, really looked at him, and then seemed to understand with a soft 'oh' as he looked away and nodded.

"I mean... he did lead you to my car, didn't he?" Pete asked, but didn't look at Gary. "Didn't you speak with him then?"

"Not about sophomore year." Gary groaned. "God, I really fucked up with him. I fucked him up bad, I fucked up our entire relationship and I don't know how to make it up to him."

"Just talk to him, Gary. I'm sure he'd appreciate it."

"Oh yeah, I guess I'm just supposed to walk up to him and go, 'sorry for almost killing you, James,' and hope he peacefully accepts that." Gary rolled his eyes. "Think logically, Petey. He's gonna be mad - furious, even - and he'll probably yell at me, and frankly, I don't have the mental energy for that right now."

"Well, I'm proud of you for giving it some thought at least." Pete got to the front of the line and put in an order for fries, handing the cashier their money. Gary thought about that for a long moment, about how someone was proud of him despite everything.

When they got back in the car, Gary stole a fry from Pete's hands and laughed at the scandalized look he got in return. He turned on the radio and practically yelled when Nirvana came on, setting to the task of singing Smells Like Teen Spirit at the top of his lungs. Pete laughed at him, then joined him, and the rest of the ride was fun until they stepped out of the car at this new therapist's office and Gary was forced to confront a building he had sworn to himself months ago that he'd never step back into.

Pete let him hold his hand as they walked inside. The waiting room was quiet, almost deathly so, and Gary found that his leg was bouncing with anxious energy before a woman came out and called his name. He was seperated from Pete (who gave him a reassuring smile), and led into the back room.

Gary was traded off to a short, red-haired lady with piercing ocean-blue eyes and a scatter of freckles over her face. She had a tattoo poking out from the sleeve of her jacket, and regarded him with a friendly air that made Gary's head spin. The last time he had had a "nice" therapist - well, let's just say it didn't go so well. As Gary observed her, however, he kept thinking to himself how much she reminded him of Jimmy, and that was a comforting thought in of itself.

"Hello, Gary. My name is Adrian." She closed the door to the small room and led him over to a small couch that he sat down on, fidgeting with the sleeves of his jacket. "What brings you to my office today?"

"Well..." Gary chewed on his bottom lip and looked to the side, his gaze locking on an office plant. It had pretty leaves, and Gary wondered vaguely if he could touch them. "You see, my friend Pete took me to McDonald's today, and I was thinking about my dad. He didn't like for me to get the kid's meals as a child, and he didn't like for me to play with toys or watch cartoons, and I dunno, I think I grew up too fast. And it made me really sad, you know? I just, I've been realizing recently that I don't have to be so angry all the time, I don't have to be on the offensive, but now that I'm relaxing a little everything's been hitting hard."

"I see why you came, then." Adrian's voice was soft. "Parental issues dig deep, I'm glad you can open up about them so effortlessly."

"Yeah. Well, that and I spent twelve months in a mental asylum recently."

Adrian paused, staring at him. He could feel his face burning, and briefly wondered if he had said something wrong before she nodded. "Okay. And what was that like?"

Gary took in a deep breath. "It sucked. Like, really sucked, and now I can't seem to get it out of my head." This isn't going to make any sense, she's going to think you're crazy. "I used to not be afraid of anything, now I feel so scared all the time. It feels like people are watching me, and I'm really- I'm scared someone's going to like, hurt me in my sleep and sometimes I have these really intense nightmares about it and-" Gary looked away as he noticed Adrian's stare, his eyes burning for the second time that day. "Wow, this must all sound really stupid."

"No, no. Keep going." Her voice was reassuring, comforting, and he shifted, nodding.

"Sometimes if people hit me the wrong way I have these really intense flashes like stuff in there is happening again, and then I'll go days and it'll feel like nothing is real... it- it all feels like I'm watching a movie from my own body, like there's- there's stuff in front of me but it's not really there, it's just objects. It feels really strange saying it out loud, but sometimes it comes with these painful headaches and I just don't get it, I'm already on medicine for stuff but-"

"Gary, did something traumatizing happen to you in the asylum?" Adrian was looking at him very seriously, and Gary felt uncomfortable. He nodded. "Can you tell me what it was?" Gary opened his mouth to respond, but then slowly closed it again and shook his head once, twice.

She sighed softly. "It sounds like you may be developing PTSD. Have you ever tried going in for a trauma screening?"

Gary felt his head spin. "PTSD?"

"Yes. It happens when a brain cannot process a painful expierence. Usually comes with flashbacks, nightmares, and in this case," she closed her eyes, "dissociation would mean a special case of PTSD called C-PTSD."

"I..." Gary looked down at his hands. "I had no idea."

Adrian looked down at her clipboard and wrote something down. "I'm going to make you an appointment for a trauma screening, alright? We'll have to see if that's what it is. I can't say for certain with just a one-on-one conversation, but if it comes up that you really do have this, it may be best to get it treated immediately before it progresses so far along that it affects your entire life."

"Does that mean I have to get rediagnosed with everything again? I mean, I'm already diagnosed with-"

"No, no, previous diagnoses don't have to be taken into account just yet. Let's just focus on this for now, okay?" She handed him a paper with an address, date and time on it. He thumbed the paper and then nodded.

"Now, what else has been on your mind? We still have a good fifty minutes before your time is up."

- - -

He hadn't spoken a word to Pete since getting in the car. Pete had tried to talk with him, but once it was clear Gary wasn't saying anything, he had stopped and turned on the radio. Gary stared out the window, watching as the Bullworth sign passed by the car window. His chest tightened.

"Pete?"

"Yeah, man?"

"Well, you see, I have another appointment next week, and I, um..." Gary tripped over his words and Pete was shaking his head.

"No, don't worry about it, man. I'll take you."

"I also have a- a trauma screening-"

"A what?"

Gary went quiet and Pete threw him a glance. "Gary, seriously man, a trauma screening? Why?"

"Adrian thinks I have C-PTSD." Gary fidgeted with the paper in his hand and shrugged as Pete's gasp sounded from beside him. "It's no big deal so please don't worry about it, I just-"

"Gary," Pete was suddenly pulling over the car, and Gary's heart thumped loud in his throat as he put it in park and turned towards him. "PTSD? What the hell happened to you? You've never shown signs of PTSD before, even with your dad."

Gary chewed on his bottom lip and shook his head once, trying to indicate that he didn't want to talk about it, but Pete continued. "Is it the asylum? Did you talk about it with her?"

"N-not a lot..." Gary whispered, stunned by the persistence of Pete's questions. Pete reached over to take his hand and squeezed it.

"Gary, are you okay? I mean like, what happened to you man?"

And then Gary was crying. Pete pulled him into an embrace as loud sobs wracked his entire body, and Pete murmured comforting things in his ear, brushing his fingertips through the taller boy's hair.

His sobs eventually faded into sniffles, and he felt exhaustion weighing down on him heavily. He still didn't speak, but Pete didn't push him too anymore, which made him feel a little guilty. Eventually he offered, "I don't think I can talk about the asylum. I don't think I'll ever be able to."

"It's okay..."

"I don't know what's going on either. You're right. This is new and it's scary and I don't know how to handle it. I promise I'm trying I just..."

"Gary, man, stop. It's okay." Pete sighed softly and squeezed his shoulder when he pulled away. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to pry."

"It's okay." Gary wiped his face and they looked at each other. Pete smiled faintly at him and then pulled away to start the car.

By the time they got back to the school, night was beginning to fall. Gary dragged himself out of Pete Kowalski's car, exhausted, and Pete walked around to hold his hand and lead him inside the gates. When they reached the dorm's doors, Gary could see Jimmy sitting on the steps, spinning a yoyo in his hands absentmindedly. Gary stopped abruptly but Pete tugged him along, whispering reassurance.

"Hey Jim." Pete greeted, and Jimmy looked up. He stood, still shorter than Gary, and looked at their hands twined together with an air of curiousity.

"So, how was therapy?" Jimmy finally said, his voice joking yet serious all at once. Gary planned on letting Pete do the talking before Pete pulled his hand away and shrugged.

"Let Gary tell you about it, man. I got stuff to do." Pete stepped around Jimmy and entered the boy's dorm, and suddenly Gary was panicking in front of his ex-friend turned enemy.

"Um." Gary shifted his weight and rubbed a hand over his face. "I-"

"Have you been crying?" Jimmy reached a hand up to touch his face and Gary practically froze, surprise rippling through him. His face burned as Jimmy's fingers brushed over his cheeks.

"I don't see how that's any of your buisness," Gary murmured, but Jimmy only shot him an exasperated look and rolled his eyes. Taking Gary gently by the wrist, he steered the taller boy inside and led him towards Gary's room.

Gary felt his heart in his throat, not knowing how to respond to any of this as his brain took a mental check out. Jimmy let him go once they were by his own dorm room and then shrugged, looking a little lost himself.

"Look man, I know we aren't on the best terms right now, but I can't hold grudges against someone who's like, actually struggling and trying to better themselves past that or whatever. Grudges are tiring anyway. I just want you to know that like, Pete told me you've been struggling and I'll do anything I can to make sure you don't collapse and cause another schoolwide riot, alright? Don't let it get that bad again. I'm not making the same mistakes twice."

Gary didn't know what to say, processing this new information briefly. "Thank you..." He finally said. After a brief moment of silence Jimmy jerked his head in a silent nod, then turned and walked away, leaving Gary on his own again.

[strongerxthanxyesterdayseries]

Stronger than Yesterday volume 1

@prettyinpayne @ohnoitsthebat @xpartywithmotorcitymachineguns @moreasoldier

--

Volume One

Summary: The year after Ajay's WWE debut, she is facing all new challenges that comes with being a diva. Not to mention, her ex boyfriend was there and he wanted to get back together with her.

Rated M

Implied Punk/Ajay

Past Lita/Ajay

Word count 1,372

Ooh hey, yeah

Hush, just stop

xx

Year: 2010

Royal Rumble

Atlanta Georgia

xx

Diva's locker room

xx

"You ready for this kid?" Mickie James asked sitting down next to Ajay Reso who was digging through her bag for her ring attire. The Canadian paused in the middle of her digging and looked up at her before shaking her head, "No, I am nervous." "Why? I have seen your matches in TNA and wrestled you there remember?" "I remember." "We tore the house down. And sure this coming match be short but at least they like you enough to give you a title shot. People can go years without a chance. You have been here for 11 months and you get another chance. You are doing something right kid." "I just get so in my head." Ajay said motioning up towards her head. Mickie nodded her head, she knew that all too well, she did bad in a match, she would beat herself up about it. And would until things got better. That was almost the most endearing part about her. “I am sorry that you got pulled last minute though, you and I would have torn down the house.” Ajay said pulling out her black and silver ring attire. ‘No doubt but you stopped the fat shaming storyline and I am thankful for it.’ Mickie said self consciously pulling at the crop top she had on.

“Not many women had the guts to stand up to them like that.” “I don’t like that, I got that enough when I was with Bobby.” She returned as she pushed her hair over her shoulder, “And I have been told I was ugly too.” “When?” It wasn’t Mickie who asked it was Maria Kanellis who spoke up having heard most of the conversation. “A lot of people. Actually Vince the first time he meet me.” She returned looking at the red head. “I have had to tell myself a lot that I am pretty and I am smart.” “And you are Ajay. You really are.” Maria said softly leaning over and hugging her quickly wanting her friend to feel better. At first she didn’t like the blonde but that was for reasons she didn’t want to remember.

“Thanks Ria.’ Ajay said before she glanced up and brightened quickly seeing her brother’s best friend standing in the doorway. “Adam!” She squealed standing up and dumping the spandex material onto the floor. The former world champion laughed and held his arms to her. She rushed over to him and he spun her around in a hug. “I am so glad you are here.” “I am glad I am too. I didn’t want to miss you winning the title for anything.” “Are you coming back tonight?” Ajay asked her blue eyes sparkling. “I can’t tell you. I wish I could.’ ‘You are! You need to throw Jericho over the top rope!’ Adam laughed and shook his head, “Come on I will walk you to hair and makeup.”

Xxx

“So no more managing Jay then?” The Rated R superstar asked as he sat across from her in the hair and makeup room. ‘Nope, they want me to start working with Punk and the Straight Edge Society.” “Why?” “Because they think we have “chemistry” and it will be good for us to be together.” ‘Do they not know about your history?” Ajay licked her lips, “Yes, I talked to Stephanie and Jaycee about it but Vince is adamant about it.” “I don’t like it Ash, I really don’t. The last time you two were together.” “I know Adam I know. I remember.” She returned as she closed her eyes, she had been on pins and needles since she had the meeting with creativing writing team. “I can talk to them for you.” He offered. “No it’s fine Ads, I can deal with it. I am just putting a fucking steel cage around my heart and hoping for the best.” “What about that Tyler Black kid?” He asked, “I know you have been talking to him. He would be good for you.” Jolene, the hair and make up artist laughed as she worked on Ajay’s hair, he didn’t know how right he was when he said that, she had heard them on the phone together and seen her facetiming him. And knew exactly how she felt about the new NXT member. “He has a girlfriend.”

“What?” Both voices asked at the same time. “Yeah. I don’t know much about her but that’s what Jimmy told me.” She said opening her eyes to look at them, “It’s fine, I had no claim to him. And if something happens with us. Then something happens. Until then I am not going to push it.” “That’s not the Ajay I know.” “This is the Ajay that has had her heart broken a handful of times and she wants to protect herself from getting hurt again. I can’t have another broken heart Adam, I can’t.’ She said softly. He knew she couldn’t and it broke his heart that she loved quickly and it always ended up getting hurt. “Okay no more sad stuff.” Jolene said, “Tonight is going to be a good night. It’s the Royal Rumble and you are getting the title tonight.” “That’s right.” Adam agreed, “And you will be the best one since our girl Lita was here.” “You are full of it but Ads but thanks.”

Xx

After she left her adopted brother in the men’s locker room, Ajay changed into her ring gear and went to stretch out. She needed the next few minutes alone to get herself together before wrestled Michelle and had to deal with Layla. Not that she minded she felt like she did better when it came to the two on one aspect then she did one on one. But that just stemmed from her time spent in Ring of Honor and TNA where she had to be better the best to be seen. “Snap out of it Ajay.” She muttered to herself, “You aren’t there anymore. You are going to be the Diva’s champion. Don’t focus on the past. Focus on the future.” “You are right.” Punk’s familiar voice said from down the hall. ‘What do you want Punk?” Ajay asked folding her arms under her chest. “To talk.” “Last time we talked we broke up. I would rather not relive that conversation.” “You can’t still be mad at me.” “You cheated on me, lied to Maria told her that we weren’t together. When we were.” “Ajay.” “Don’t. For once your life. Don’t.’ She said as the stage hand waved her down. ‘They are ready for you Ashton.” “Thank you.” She said thankful for the distraction. She brushed past her ex boyfriend.

Xx

Michelle McCool went out first in hopes to get in her opponent's head something she hadn’t been able to do since Ajay had replaced Mickie in the match and nothing she had tried and had worked. The younger blonde stumped her and had since the first day they had met. “Come on little Ashton, why don’t you come out and show us that you are just as good as your two big brothers.” She taunted, “Which we all know that you aren’t. I mean come on. You just act like you are good enough.” Layla El who had come with Michelle to the ring started laughing and voicing her agreement which was cut short by the start of Christian’s entrance theme and the youngest Cage sibling stepped out. “Be careful what you wish for McCool.” She said as the camera zoomed in on her.

Within several seconds she was in the ring taking both members of LayCool. Spearing Layla and then delivering a super kick that Shawn Michaels would be proud of to the former champion and then quickly covered for the three count. “Here is your winner and new Diva’s champion Ashton Cage!”

[eldritchsurveys]

o93.

I made a little survey based off the characters of Shameless. Contains spoilers. by foxandforest Fiona: Have you ever made one mistake that keeps coming back to haunt you? >> I’m contractually obliged to take this because I love this show. I’m glad Jimmy has finally disappeared, because I have no idea what this question is in actual reference to, but to me he is definitely one of Fiona’s biggest haunting mistakes. (Please don’t tell me his ass comes back at the end of s8 or some shit just to fuck with me.) Anyway, no, I don’t think so. Most of my bigger mistakes I only make a couple of times before I start wising up. Lip: Are you the first person in your family to do something? Or have you made a decision that surprised your loved ones? >> I’m sad Lip didn’t stay in college, but he’s a good lad. He did what he felt was right. I’m still proud of him. I don’t think I’m the first in my immediate family to do anything, except maybe commit to a lifelong astral roadtrip with bastard gods. Heh. Debbie: Name one wise and mature thing you have done, then name one foolish and immature thing you have done. >> Debbie need to let that man of hers go and stop treating him like a babysitter, but she does seem to be doing a rather okay job with Franny otherwise, even though she’s literally never home, lmfao? I don’t know what’s going on there. Anyway, I don’t really know how to measure my decisions like that. That’s an easier judgement call to make when you’re standing on the outside. Carl: Is there a person or cause that you care about, and you feel like you’re fighting for it all by yourself? >> I applaud Carl’s discipline and stick-to-it-tiveness, but like... the fuckin military, man. Anyway, no, I don’t feel that way about anything. Ian: Is there a commitment that you couldn’t handle and have given up on? >> I was really afraid Ian was going to lose that EMT job, but he’s doing good, it seems! Now, to fix the Trevor thing... Anyway, yeah, I had to renege on my commitment to a relationship that proceeded far more intensely and consumingly (shut up, I know that’s not a word, but it is one for my purposes right now) than I could have fathomed. I don’t regret the effort, but I did learn that I have more limits than I assumed I did. 

Frank: If you learned that your favorite activity would kill you if you continued, would you give it up? >> Y’all do realise that Frank is literally unkillable, right? Anyway, that depends on how it would kill me, and how long it would take. I know alcohol causes bodily harm, but I also know that there are a lot of variables that contribute to how much harm it causes and how long it takes for that harm to manifest as actual illness, and so on and so forth. So, yes -- drinking will definitely kill me. But with any luck, and with low consumption, maybe it’ll wait 25 or so years before it starts trying in earnest. The bottom line is that everything and anything on this planet or in this body is liable to kill me at any time, and my duty is to weigh the risks against the benefits and make the best decision I can make for the life I want to live. Monica: Have you ever apologized to someone and they rejected it? Did you try again? >> On the flip side, Monica never has to worry about trying to apologise to anyone ever again. *slaps knee* But yeah, I wouldn’t accept one from her, either. I get what her deal was but I sure as fuck wouldn’t have to like it. Anyway, I don’t think so. I mean, no one’s flat-out said to me “fuck your apology” or anything like that, unless it was in the heat of the moment literally right after the thing happened (in which case, I mean, fuck you too but also fair). Liam: Who took care of you when you were a baby/little kid? Are they still around? >> LOL remember when Liam got into that coke Anyway, I was raised by my father. Yeah, he’s still around. I should probably call him very soon. Mickey: Have you come to terms with something about yourself? When did you finally accept this fact? >> I do still miss Mickey’s ornery ass. He did come a long way in a short time. I mean, I come to terms with things about myself all the time. Life is an ongoing process of learning. It’s not even remarkable to me anymore. Mandy: If you wanted to booty-call any of your exes, would they oblige? >> I wouldn’t do that, though. That ain’t my style. I’m pretty much celibate in regards to actual humans anyway, thanks to a lot of factors (none of which have anything to do with anyone except me, so). Amanda: Have you ever dated or hung out with someone just to make someone else upset? >> Who was this again? LMAO Anyway, no. Sheila: Do you find it rewarding to take care of people? >> LOL FUCKIN SHEILA. Anyway, I don’t know. It wasn’t rewarding to take care of Tommy, and that’s all I know. Sammi: Even when it comes to extended family members, do you feel a certain obligation to your family? >> Here’s another character I’m glad I never have to see again (HOPEFULLY). I don’t feel a single iota of familial obligation. I honestly never have, not even to the man who raised me. I love and respect him because he actually dedicated his retired years to raising me instead of doing what my mother did, and that’s it -- I’d feel the same way even if we weren’t blood-related. But like, the sense of obligation towards people who share one’s DNA? I’ve never felt that a day in my life. (Which is good, because a lot of those people are fucking terrible.) Chuckie: What is something about you that might make it difficult for someone to become friends with you? >> I’m emotionally distant and not terribly invested in being liked by most people. Like, it’s nice, but I’m not necessarily going to work for it or jump through any hoops.  Kevin: Are you concerned about war or extreme violence in society? >> I LOVE KEV I’m only concerned about it in the sense that I don’t want to be caught in a situation of extreme violence, or be caught in a warzone. Otherwise, my concern regarding war and violence is of a pragmatic, “humans probably shouldn’t do this to each other” sort of sense -- but not necessarily an emotionally invested one. Veronica: When it comes to relationships, how important is marriage to you? What about having children? >> I LOVE V Marriage isn’t terribly important to me, but Sparrow seems pretty into it and I’m not against it, so, you know. Children are of shifting importance to me -- I do want to participate in a child’s life, but sometimes I think it’s a bad idea because of how emotionally distant I can be, or because of how easily overstimulated I am by stuff like noise and constant social contact. I don’t know. I guess every prospective parent suffers trepidation (I wouldn’t trust one that was overconfident, tbh), so it doesn’t necessarily mean I shouldn’t do it. It just means I should make sure I have help. (Sparrow only partially counts because she’d be the working parent.) Svetlana: Have you ever disliked a person because they dated someone you liked? >> I can’t believe V had to sic ICE on Putin’s Paradise, oh my god. (Like, fuck ICE to hell and back, but that was hilarious.) And no, I’ve never felt that way. Jimmy: Have you ever watched a show where a character unexpectedly came back from the dead? >> Jimmy, please stay gone this time, I beg thee. Anyway, yeah, that happens in media I watch all the time. Remember, if you don’t see an unmistakable corpse, there’s always a chance.

[shemakesmusic-uk]

This segment features artists who have submitted their tracks/videos to She Makes Music. If you would like to be featured here then please send an e-mail to shemakesmusic@hotmail.com. We look forward to hearing from you!

NADUH

NADUH, composed of TARANEH (aka Tee Krispil), Jenny Lea (of I M U R), Rosita Alcantara (of Off Topic), Giorgi Holiday (aka Giorgi), and Larisa Marie, write, engineer, and produce all of their music – meaning they have crafted a sound that’s truly representative of their collective energy. With heavy influences from 90’s R&B, soul, and modern hip-hop, the self proclaimed soft/hard music NADUH make is representative of their queer, femme/tomboy identities as they dance between themes of empowerment and juicy realness. New single, ‘CHAPSTICK,’ was produced by TARANEH and written by all five members. Flipping the script on the often used line in male hip hop – “I took your girl…” – the crew wrote a queer rendition from the perspective of women having the power and energy to attract other women. The band elaborate: "Women do it better, we all know that. This song is the perfect example of the SOFT/HARD juxtaposition in our music. Remember where the fuck you grew, from fetus to a baby. Every person came from a womb. This line is a reminder to respect your origins, which means respecting women. Women hold the power to both give life and to attract other women. When making this track, we talked a lot about what it meant to own our sexuality in this dominant way and how a song could never summarize the complexities of our sexual identities – ‘CHAPSTICK’ is just one snapshot.” Listen below.

NADUH · CHAPSTICK

Chantae Vetrice

Chantae’ began her professional career in Atlanta, GA working alongside some of the industry’s top producers such as producer J Rell and landed a production deal with Anthony Dent. After living in Atlanta, she moved to Ibiza Spain where she focused on creating her image and coming into more of her own as an artist. Musically, she was able to work with producer Rui Da Silva of the famous song titled ‘Touch Me’ and Sonic Vista Studios where artists such as Lady Gaga record when on the island. Outside of music, fashion and modeling has always been her passion and has allowed her some exposure. Her new song, 'Elevated' is a “song that has a message and is for the culture but still something you can dance to. I teamed up with famous director International P (Mr. Swipey, Fivio Foreign, French Montana, etc) to bring this sound to life,” says Chantae. Listen below.

Chantae Vetrice · Elevated

Priz Em

Virtual diva Priz Em was created to captivate all who witness her. Her sultry blend of husky tones and catchy tracks will move both your spirit and your feet. Priz Em comes to us from the fantasy world, of Mega Centarri; even though she is from a world of fantasy her voice and music are very real. The creative team behind Priz Em’s music are veteran songwriters: Bruce Irvine, Merlin Rhys Jones, Jack Gunderson and Kathy Irvine. Her music is produced and recorded by Canadian legendary producers and musicians: Anthony Anderson and Steve Smith. The Mega Centarri website showcase’s Priz Em’s world and her music in ear and eye-catching detail. Her song ‘Heartless’ is out now. The story of Priz Em’s life is told in the graphic novel Mega Centarri published on Comixology and Crypto Comics. The Mega Centarri social-network game is presently in development. Listen to ‘Heartless’ below.

Joely Smith

South London’s Joely Smith is a member of the band adults and when the pandemic put a stop to that temporarily she spent that time on Garageband creating some new music. Out of that emerged a collection of demos. “The theme of the demos is tempo discretion,” explains Joely. “Not for an artistic reason, but because if you record without a metronome on your own (i.e. poor technique), you really are reliant on that first guitar take. The song 'Pale' feels a bit strange to talk about, but I cared about getting this song right the most and I think that is why it might be worth trying to share. Oh and I’m really proud of the bassline at the end, naturally. It took around a year from writing it to have the cahoots to record anything. Its a little demo call to arms if you like, dont play it cool if this is something you care about, whats the point? Especially if you are over 25. Society regards you as over the hill anyway so you may as well do what feels right and if that is to poorly record all your feelings on an afternoon then you should do that - and maybe people shouldn't hear a testing Macbook mic recording of a dead-string cheap acoustic guitar, but if I don't get rid of these demos then what was the point of learning the drums.” Listen to ‘Pale’ below.

joely smith · PALE

KAHLLA

We’ve probably all been there, at least over the past year in lockdown, asking ourselves: Am I doing enough? Should I be doing more? Does my life compare to my Instagram timeline? German born, London-based artist Kahlla discusses exactly that feeling on her newest single ‘Anything at All’. The track follows up from recent single ‘Thread’ and 2020’s debut EP Sense of Self. On ‘Anything at All’, Kahlla blends a hard-hitting drum machine groove, a driving bass line and stacks of vocal harmonies to craft a piece of personal pop music that’s hard to pin to a single genre. About the song Kahlla says: “I wrote ‘Anything at All’ at the beginning of lockdown, when everything suddenly came to a standstill. That sudden big amount of free time made me overthink a lot and spend too much time stalking beautiful people on social media. Very symptomatic of my generation, but not a good combo! I wanted the song and video to convey that feeling of nothing happening and you just being in your head all the time.” ‘Anything at All’ was co-produced by Duncan Pym (Mysie, Litany) and Kahlla and is the second single off her upcoming sophomore EP Time, to be released in spring 2021. Influenced by artists such as Jimmy Eat World, Lapsley and Death Cab for Cutie this sophomore EP is Kahlla at her most self-assured, releasing a body of work entirely written, co-produced and visually dreamt up by herself. Listen to ‘Anything At All’ below.

KAHLLA · Anything At All

HEAD BALLET

Emerging from the midst of a pandemic, the trio met through a friend, clicked and formed HEAD BALLET. Now living together in Manchester, they harness inspiration from alternative giants such as Orbital and Yeah Yeah Yeahs, creating music which longs for the return of festival tents, packed nightclubs and strobe lights. HEAD BALLET are making art for a new decade bound to be defined by the pursuit of hedonistic escape. Their new single ‘Polythene’ is about the desire for purpose when you’re stuck in a repetitive cycle. Wanting to be remembered, have an element of permanence and to defy pre-existing limits. Listen below.

HEAD BALLET · Polythene

[deadgwen]

IT IS A HAPPY 17TH BIRTHDAY TO THE BEST GOAT

@fucshias  @jiilys  MY LOVE GOATY. MY MOST BEAUTIFUL GOAT. MY SUN. MY STARS. MY BEAUTIFUL HOOVED CREATURE OF GOD. I HAVE ARRIVED TO SAY SOME IMPORTANT THINGS BUT FIRSTLY I LOVE YOU I LOVE I LOVE YOU U R READING THIS POST RIGHT NOW DUE TO A VERY IMPORTANT REASON AND THIS IMPORTANT REASON IS THAT

*CHOKES BACK TEARS*

IT IS UR BIRTHDAY.

*SCREAMING*

OK OKI DOKI BEFORE I START: I AM NOT ACTUALLY HERE BUT DO NOT BE D I S E N H E AR T E N E D BC I JUST DONT HAVE WIFI BUT I PROMISE U SOMEWHERE OUT THERE I AM SULKING AND FIGHTING A WALL AND ALSO SETTING OFF FIREWORKS BC !!!!!!!!!!!!! ITS UR FUCKING DAY AND IM SORRY I COULD NOT WISH U BUT I LOVE U SO SO SO SO SO SO SO MUCH I AM HERE W/ U IN SPIRIT

ALRIGHT ALRIGHT ALRIGHT TURN THE FUCK UP HAPPY FUCKING BIRTHDAY TO MY LOVE HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO U UR EXCELLENT AND I LOVE YOU AND ALSO WHAT THE FUCK BINCH HOW ARE U SEVENTEEN TODAY U ASSHOLE (COPYRIGHT U KNOW WHO) WHO ALLOWED U TO BE LIKE THIS AND ALSO I LOVE YOU. AND ALSO I CANT BELIEVE UVE DONE THIS. UR LITERALLY SEVENTEEN TODAY I AM NOT ALRIGHT AND I NEED U TO HOLD ME BECAUSE I AM GOING TO COME OVER AND FOR THE SOLE PURPOSE OF BEING A DRAMATIC BITCH I WILL FAINT IN UR ARMS I AM 100% NOT ALRIGHT

like,,,, HONESTLY u are so. fucking. great. WHERE DO I EVEN START. 

FIRST AND FOREMOST I WANNA SAY I AM SO FUCKING EXCITED FOR THIS FOR UR BDAY I LOVE YOU GOATY I AM SO PUMPED THAT UR SO OLD ITS RIDICULOUS @ ME FUCK OFF ALRIGHT BUT. JUST. I LOVE I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU AND HAPPY BIRTHDAY U GOAT UR BEYOND INCREDIBLE

UR OFFICIALLY A DANCING QUEEN UR YOUNG AND SWEET. ONLY. *SMASHES OPEN MY WINDOW AT 12 MIDNIGHT* SEVENTEEEEEEEEEEEEEN

SO OH MY GOD. I AM CURRENTLY YELLING BECAUSE??????????? LIKE???????????????? YOU'RE SEVENTEEN??????? HOW DID WE EVEN COME TO THIS POINT ITS INSANE LIKE HOW THE FUCK ARE YOU SEVENTEEN WE'RE ALL JUST STILL TINY SMOLS WHERE ARE U GOING WHY ARE U GROWING OLDER STOP IT PLS ALRITE I DO NOT LIKE. MY PRECIOUS GOAT SUNSHINE WHO IS A PROFESSIONAL PAJAMA CONSULTANT A REAL SOLID BUSINESSWOMAN WHO DRIVES AND SHIT AND COULD PROBABLY RUN ME OVER AND IS 6'3 SO IF U WOULD SIT ON ME I WOULD MOST CERTAINLY DIE UR OFFICIALLY A DANCING QUEEN AND I AM CRYING

but in all seriousness I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU i am FOREVER AND EVER glad that i met u LIKE I FUCKIN HATE U GODMDAN FUCKIBG GOAT MAKING ME REBLOG THIGNS FUCK YUO FUCK O FF but like????? apart from that UR FUCKING BEYOND FABULOUS and i have decided to compile a list of reasons why u are unbelievably great and have earned ur title of being a dancing queen/brilliant goat/actual love of my life. bc u are excellent. AND IT MUST BE WRITTEN OUT HERE SOMEWHERE THAT I LOVE YOU. 

OK OK OK SO HERE WE GO BINCHES. PREPARE URSELF. THIS IS GONNA BE SUPER LENGTHY BECAUSE I LOVE YOU A LOT AND I AM GONNA DO A 'ON THE JELLICOE ROAD' WORTHY REVIEW OF U BUT LIKE A SHITTIER VERSION SO U BETTER FUNKIN BUCKLE UP BITCH

LEZGO:

IS OBVIOSULY FABULOUS

IS A REAL LIFE GIRAFFE 

WE ARE BLESSED TO HAVE ONE ROAM OUT OF CAPTIVITY LIKE............. WE ARE STRONGLY BLESSED

I CANNOT STRESS ENOUGH

CLAIMS TO HAVE 'barely any leg but a huge torso' and interpret this how u want bUT i just wanna say u r the most fucked up giraffe ever ok what the fuck WHO HURT YOU

apparently dis binch owns a bunny AND NEVER TOLD ME SHE DID

owns a problematic rabbit bc it pees everywhere

said problematic rabbit likes to pee everywhere so much its ridiculous it has no respect for the value of items of modern society and thus in my opinion should be sent to COURT

@ rabbit U NASTY OK PLS GET UR PRIORITIES SORTED???? THIS HAS BEEN A MOTHERFUCKING PSA THANK U (CAROLINE I AM TRUSTING YOU TO SHOW THIS ON UR PHONE TO THE GODDAMN BUNNY I NEED IT TO KNOW)

is 100% excellent at looking after drunk people ALRITE literally THIS WOMAN IS A SAINT who has saved REAL LIVES tbh where would that poor child from your old intermediate be if u hadn't SAVED HIS ENTIRE LIFE from all that tequila he would DEAD thats fuKCIN RIGHT U DESERVE ALL THE MEDALS A TRUE HERO AMONG NEW ZEALANDERS. A NATIONAL ICON. SO BRAVE I AM SO PROUD I LOVE YOU ALWAYS

AND ALSO PULLING DRUNK MAKING OUT PEOPLE OFF EACH OTHER I JUST WANT U TO KNOW THAT UR EFFORTS ARE SO VERY RECOGNIZED BECAUSE ONE TIME I DID THAT AND I GOT PUNCHED IN THE THROAT I THOUGHT I DIED BECAUSE I SAW JESUS BUT IT WASNT ACTUALLY JESUS IT WAS JUST A POSTER TAPED TO A FRIDGE I WAS SCAMMED

her own mum has called the police on her and was 100% ready for some quality fun family jailtime

ALSO ONE TIME GOATY ACCIDENTALLY FUCKED UP SOMEONES REAR MIRROR AND THE VICTIMS OF THE INCIDENT DID NOT GIVE HALF A FUCK HOWEVER, HER MOTHER GOATY REPORTED SEVERAL FUCKS TO THE POLICE AND FILED AN ACCIDENT REPORT AND THAT WAS THE DAY MY GOATY BECAME A DARK CRIMINAL

*OMINOUS MUSIC*

I AM STILL WAITING FOR THE DAY I WALK MY BUTT INTO COURT AGAINST UR MUM COVERED HEAD TO ASS IN $3 PLASTIC BRACELETS BACKED BY UR UNEXPECTEDLY KLEPTOMANIAC SISTER AND A BASKET OF STOLEN WOMANS DAYS AND ALONG WITH BLING BLING JIMMY WE WILL RESTORE THE RIGHTEOUSNESS AND LACK OF CONSCIENCE ON THIS LOVELY EARTH

ALRIGHT ALRIGHT ENOUGHT ABOUT UR MUM LIKE ACTUALLY ALL UR FAMILY MEMBERS ARE DIFFERENT LEVELS OF WILD AND..... I AM AFRAID

OK OK IT MUST BE SAID CAROLINE HAS THE MOST AMAIZNG VOICE ????? EVER

like i love her voice sm SO FUCKING MUCH I TELL U i have never heard anything like it and i want caroline to like read me books for hours AND HOURS AND NARRATE MY WHOLE ENTIRE LIFE because i love how unusually deep and shadowy her voice sounds like deep flowing river water or smth like i LOVE IT SO MUCH it. Is.So. Strange BUT I LOVE IT IT IS THE COOLEST GODDAMN THING THROW A BUCKET AT ME I LOVE YOU

HAS A VIDEO OF HERSELF DOING THE ICE BUCKET CHALLENGE AND I KNOW I HAVE PRAISED IT FOR TWO YEARS IN A ROW ALREADY LIKE @ ME PLZ CHILL BUT i will not i will NEVER it is solid entertainment a+++ QUALITY I AM LAUGHIGN IM LAUGHING I AM LAUGHING FOREVER those beautiful hops of pain across ur backyard ARE THE LAST THINGS I WANT TO SEE BEFORE GOD TAKES ME FROM THIS EARTH

WRONGFULLY FRAMED ME FOR HAVING SHIT DICK TENDENCIES AND THEN YELLED AT ME AND CALLED ME A GARAGE WHAT A BINCH I AM IN LOVE

loves yellow flowers AND ALL THE FLOWERS AND HEAVY ROSES AND IS A FULL OUT FLOWER HOE

IS DESPICABLE TEEN WOLF GARBAGE LIKE.... ive been scrolling through our fanmails AND MY HEART HUR T S G O A T Y hOld mE we were sO Y O U N  G and like no lie i shit u not 80% oF THE FUCKING MESSAGES ARE U YELLING 'STYDIA IS GONNA HAPPEN THIS SEASON' AND 'OH MY GOD DID U SEE THAT STYDIA SCENE' AND DECLARATIONS OF LOVE FOR LYDIA MARTIN AND THE OTHER 20% IS U ASKIN ME IF IVE SEEN THE NEW TEEN WOLF I LOVE IT I LOVE YOU I AM SORRY TEEN WOLF KEEPS DISAPPOINTING US BOTH BUT STDYIA IS. DEFINIETELY. GONNA. HAPPEN. THIS. SEASON. IT HAS TO OR I WILL FUKIN FITE ALRIGHT GIVE US STYDIA OR GIVE US DEATH I LOVE UR TEEN WOLF LOVIBG ASS

anyway caroline is an utterly excellent person

if u were an ncea paper i would grade u with excellence

*FINGER GUNS*

like ?????deals with my stupid yelling ALL THE TIME

whenever i had a problem and went to my goaty she was so very understanding and patient AND DID NOT CALL ME A DUMBASS WHEN I DESERVED TO BE DECKED

TOLD ME THE TRU DEFINTION OF THE PHRASE 'SHOT'

TWO YEARS OF UTTER CONFUSION. ERASED FROM MY LIFE. PERMANENTLY.

MY SKIN?? CLEARED . MY FUTURE BILLS ??? PAID MY HUSBAND MARRIED MY STATUE FOR CAROLINE FULLY ERECTED

ok but like i can never say this enough goaty IS SO NICE TO TALK TO PLETAHE TALK TO ME FORVER SHE IS FABULOUS??? it blows my mind constantly that someone this incredible and special walks along this earth NONE OF US DESERVE THE GOAT

also ???? WHAT IN THE FUCK HOW HAVE I NOT MENTIONED THIS YET CAROLINE IS THE BEST WRITER I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE SHE IS SO TALENTED EVERY TIME I READ ONE OF HER FICS I END UP THINKING ABOUT IT AFTERWARDS FOR 958495894 YEARS ALRIGHT THEY FUCK ME UP THEY WAY SHE HANDLES WORDS FUCKS ME UP HOW CAN YOUT TAKE FUCKING LETTERS AND THEN SHOVE THEM UP MY ASS LIKE THIS I AM NOT ALRIGHT I AM NOT ALRIGHT I AM NOT ALRIGHT I am Not Strong Enough For This

i am not even kidding ok THE WAY U HANDLE WORDS IS IN.FUCKING.CREDIBLE whenever u use them its like?? u turned them into something precious and all your writing have this feel to it like as if im holding a delicate bouqet of a thousand yellow flowers like im holding a butterfly in my hands like im holding a box of eggs and i am scared shitless to drop it bC MY DAD WILL PERSONALLY CRUCIFY ME

I AM AWFUL AT DESCRIPTIONS BUT I HOPE U SEE WHAT I MEAN. LIKE. IT IS SO *SCREAMS* MINBLOWING DECK ME WITH ALL UR WORDS EVER

I AM ONE HUNDRED FUCKING PERCENT NEVER OKAY WITH ANYTHING YOU WRITE IT HURTS SO GOOD AND I LOVE IT

ok ok this hoe right here has written THREE fics with a dedication for me at the beginning and like.............. ..... do u ever just cri

i have 'the glorious everywhere' printed out and FUCKING PINNED TO MY WALL WHERE I CAN SEE IT FROM ALL CORNERS OF MY ROOM ALWAYS back in my apartment in russia like it is legitimately the best thing. i love everything about this piece it should be adapted into a novel or a short film like PULL SOME FIFTY SHADES OF GREY SHIT W/ IT OK the imagery and REALNESS of this fic gets to me all the time and im crying im crying im crying I ABSOLUTELY ADORE IT PLS @ CAROLINE WHY ARE U SO TALENT

ALRIGHT ALRIGHT ALRIGHT LOOK AT THIS BULLSHIT FUCKIG I THINK ABOUT THIS FIC EVERY SINGLE DAY WHEN I WAKE UP FUCKING LOOK ' You see her hair dripping down her head and spinning out over the seats in the back and lighting them on fire. You see her pale skin and electric veins as she puts her hand out the window and tries to catch the sky and stuff it up her sleeve. You hear her voice, “Just drive James, you’ll know where we’re going when we get there.”  

REALLY I AM NOT FUCKIGN Okay CALL AN AMBULANCE CALL IT NOW I AM UNWELL I AM SICK I AM DYING FUK ME RITE UP

i am fully convinced this is the greatest thing thats ever been written.like. How. the. FUCK. tbh i want this paragraph ENTIRELY TATTOOED ON MY ASS I AM ZCRYING @ CAROLINE YOU HAVE THE MOST BEAUTIFUL BRAIN AND I AM SO VERY GLAD THAT IT EXISTS

i will not go into depth abt yelling about ur fics bc tbh i think u Know but I JUST WANNA SAY 'oh darling i have coloured blood (that i stole from you)' is the most iconic piece of literature to this day ever the and i zcri all the time because you are a goddamn bloody genius and you shine in colours beyond my comprehension and i love you so so so incredibly much

MY LOVE IS SO FUCKING TALENTED I AM YELLING I AM YELLING I AM YELLING

DOESN'T EAT FRIED SPERM

writes the BEST emails in history

UR SO LOVELY U GIVE ME SO MANY BEAUTIFUL SPELLING ERRORS FOR ME TO WHOLEHEARTEDLY ENJOY I AM GIGGLING *GIGGLES* IT BRINGS ME SO MUCH JOY WHEN U FUCK THINGS UP

tbh it is how fried chair came to life like it was actually in one of your first fanmails to me u said that two years ago and to this day it remains the Most Iconic Thing Ever

STRONG SUPPORTER OF WEETBIX

LOVES WEETBIX

FOUGHT TIGERS AND LIONS FOR HER FAMILY AND WAS SAVED BY WEETBIX AND WEETBIX ALONE 

ACTUALLY HAD A THING CALLED ‘WEETBIX DISCOURSE’ ON HER BLOG LIKE IT WAS ACTUALLY A THING THAT HAPPENED A REAL THING THAT OCCURED AND WAS PASSIONATELY ARGUED ABOUT AND I HAVE SEEN THINGS THAT CANNOT BE UNSEEN

RIGHTFULLY SO BC WEETBIX >>>>> JONAH GRIGGS I AM SORRY IT IS THE RULES

FUCK THE H8RS

like ??? is hilarious af QUEEN OF HUMOUR AND MAKING ME SNORT MY GODDAMN CHOCLATE MILK LIKE CAN U NOT BE SO EXCEPTIONAL U HO HAVE SOME CONSIDERATION U LIL BITCH but YES a++ top notch QUALITY storytelling skills in both fic writing and tequila struggles I APPRECIATE IT TO DEATH

ok ok ok also the most beautiful person ever??? LIKE ???????????????? BITCH WHAT THE FUCK ??????????????????????????????????????????????? WHO ALLOWED U

THE MOST PERFECT HAIR. ur hair is like waves of a golden ocean cascading from ur hEAD AND IT IS SO MAGICALLY FITTING B/C U R AN ETHEREAL BEING AND THE FACT THAT U HAVE AN ENTIRE WILD SEA RAGING ON UR HEAD JUST PROVES TO ME THAT U ARE A GOD AMONG MORTALS. UR HAIR IS SO PRETTY OK OK OKAY FUCK ME UP. STRAIGHT UP GORGEOUS. SO SOFT TOO AND SO SHINY AND IT FITS U SO WELL I AM FOREVER SCREAMING

THE MOST ANGEL FACE. GOATYS FACE LOOKS LIKE GOD OR WHOEVER THE FUCK WAS RESPONSIBLE CARVED IT OUT OF ROSE PETALS AND MARBLE LIKE. IT. IS. TRULY. THE MOST GORGEOUS THING ur face is softer than clouds tbh AND UR SMILE SAVES MY LIFE ITS BRIGHTER THAN THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE CONDENSED AND SOMETIMES WHEN I SEE UR SELFIES I HAVE TO GO GET LASER EYE SURGERY BECAUSE I HAVE BEEN B L I N D E D

U R SO UNCONSIDERATE TO MY FRAGILE HEALTH HOW DARE YOU

SO. GODDAMN GORGEOUS SLAY MY ENTIRE LIFE I BEG U ID PAY U TO SIT ON ME WITH UR HUGE BONES AND SLOWLY CRUSH ME INTO AN ENDLESS DEATH I HAVE $4 LEFT OVER FROM MY LIFE SAVINGS DO IT BAE

has the best taste in music omg WHAT A BLESSING WE LIKE THE SAME SONGS AND IT ACTUALLY KIND OF SCARES ME B/C IT FEELS LIKE WE ARE THE SAME PERSON AND THIS DOES NOT HELP MY CONSTANT STATE OF EXISTENTIAL CRISIS

HAS THE BEST TASTE IN BOOKS and adores skam as much as i do AND LOVES CHRIS/EVA AS MUCH AS IDO AND WROTE A FIC FOR THEM AND THE SNIPPET FROM IT ????? MY SOUL. GONE.

so tol and will never stop accusing me of being smol but listen up aight. imma FUCK YOU UP. REAL GOOD. ONE DAY. WHEN I CAN AFFORD TO BUY A LADDER. UNTIL THEN SLEEP WITH ONE EYE OPEN BINCH BC I AM COMING TO GET U

and is also the smartiest smart to ever smart LOOK AT MY U GO WITH UR EXCELLENCE ENDORSEMENT when i buy that ladder I WILL CLIMB IT AND HOVER AROUND UR HEAD LOTS SO I CAN ABSORB UR POWERS AND ALSO BREATHE THE FRESH AIR UP THERE WHICH IS NOT AVAILABLE TO GROUNDED PEASANTS SUCH AS ME

AND IS THE BEST COOKIE THE LOVE OF MY LIFE LIKE IF THIS ISNT ENOUGH TO CONVINCE ANYONE THAT CAROLINE IS BEYOND EXCEPTIONAL FOR OUR GALAXY THEN THEY CAN FUCK OFF PLS OK

like honestly,,, MY LOVE I COULD GO ON FOR YEARS AND YEARS AND CENTURIES UNTIL MY TEETH FALL OUT AND I GROW SENILE WITH MY LOVE BUT THE POINT OF THIS HOT STEAMING LAME MESS IS THAT I LOVE YOU TO BLOODY PIECES UR SO F U C K I N G INCREDIBLE I AM SO GLAD I MET YOU AND THAT YOU TAlk TO ME AND WE EMAIL EACH OTHER AND I AM BLESSED THAT YOU EVEN THINK OF ME AND THAT FREID CHAIR LOVES ME AND THAT U R MY GOAT BC UR MY ONLY GOAT AND UR THE BEST ONE THERE IS NO SHADE @ ALL OTHER GOATS BUT LIKE. IM SORRY I CANNOT TELL A LIE

IT IS THE COLD HARD TRUTH. 

and like??? i did a /search/deadgwen ON @jiilys BC I WANTED TO LOOK AT ALL OUR OLD STUFFS FROM 2015 and I Regret it I Regret it So Much theres a selfie from like when i was 14 and an idiot still on Ur blog and I look like an actual tragedy I Want to Die  we have known each other for so long its RIDICULOUS UR STILL AS AMAZING AS U WERE BACK THEN AND I AM MORE OR LESS CURED OF MY CONDITION OF BEING AN EMBARASSING DIPSHIT AND ITS CRAZY HOW MUCH YOUNGER WE WERE THEN LIKE UM WTF BUT UR STILL AS BEAUTIFUL AND 9384930X TIMES MORE AND I STILL LOVE U BC UR PERFECT AS EVER AND THAT IS WHAT MATTERS

NOW. I WAS GONNA MAKE YOU A PRESENT LIKE I REALLY DID BAE I TRIED SO MUCH SHIT ITS HORRIBLE BC LIKE ??? I WANTED TO MAKE YOU A PRESENTATION ON UR GOAT SUPERIORTY LIKE I DID LAST YEAR EXCEPT Like i am a fucking asshole™(COPYRIGHT JONAH GRIGGS THE MAN TEH MYTH THE LEGEND) who cannot do shit FOR SHIT it turned out so Awful and i cANNOT GRAPHIC BABE I TRIED TO MAKE YOU THIS EDIT AND THEN I REALIZED IT WAS Bad AND FOUGHT MYSELF FOR SIX HOURS AND I CANNOT WRITE AND YOU DESERVE ALL THE GIFTS EVER BUT I AM TRULY AWFUL

*ZCRIES*

I KNOW IM  LAME AND MY ONLY TALENT IS YELLING FOR HOURS ON END I WISH I COULD HAVE MADE YOU SOMETHING REALLY COOL BC ITS UR SEVENTEETH AND 17 IS THE BEST NUMBER AND UR LOVELY AND I LOVE YOU SO PLEASE FORGIVE ME BAE FOR BEING AN ACTUAL GARAGE ASSHOLE (COPYRIGHT JONAH GRIGGS THE EXPERIENCE) SHIT DICK 100% TERRIBLE DICKFLUTE OKAY I LOVE YOU AND I CAN NEVER IMAGINE WHAT I WOULD BE WITHOUT YOU IN MY LIFE AND I HOPE YOU HAVE A REALLY REALLY REALLY GOOD YEAR LIKE FUCK SHIT UP BAE UR GONNA BE IN YEAR 13 ITS ALL GONNA BE SO AWFUL AND WE WILL ALL DIE aND WERE SO O L D JESUS CHRIST IF HEART ATTACKS DONT TAKE US OUT NCEA LEVEL 3 WILL BUT I HOPE THIS WILL BE A SUPER GOOD YEAR FOR U IN REGARDS OF EVERYTHING BECAUSE U DESERVE IT U DESERVE IT U DESERVE IT I HOPE THINGS WILL LEAD UP TO U GETTING THAT APARTMENT IN NEW YORK AND ALL THE HIGH HEELS THAT U WILL WEAR AND ALL THE YELLOW FLOWERS THAT U WILL BUY AND UR CAREER AS A LIFECHANGING LITERARY GENIUS OK OK I LOVE YOU HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABE

ok ok ok but. 

ONE MORE THING.

LISTEN.

THE FUCKING

*CLECNHES JAW*

REBLOG FIASCO

*FLINGS MY ASS INTO THE SUN*

WHEN IT IS GOOD AND DAYLIGHT. U HAVE UNTIL THEN. LIKE I KNOW THIS IS UR BIRTHDAY WISH AND I LOVE YOU BUT FUCK OFF HWO COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME I FUCKING TRUSTED YOU I FUCKING FUCK JUST FUCK YOU FUCKING DICK i will RIOT 

OKAY BABE ITS MIDNIGHT AND ILL BE UP IN ABOUT SIX HOURS AND LIKE. ANYTHING. ANYTHING ELSE FOR UR BIRTHDAY WISH OK BABE IM GONNA FUCKING DIE THIS IS IT THIS THE END I WILL GO DOWN SWEARING PROFUSELY WITH A HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE AND U WILL BE WATCHING AND LAUGHI G ANF @OFFICALTALL FUCK YU FUCKDUCKUD CUDCKUD DNUSJNDJF FUCK U @GOATY FUCK. UFCN WHERE IS UR HOOF WHY ARE U NOT FEELIN THE TEMPERATURE ITS EBOLA ITS GOATBOLA I WONT MAKE IT UNTIL DAWN I WONT SEE THE SUNLIGHT GOATY I CANT *FAKE CRYING SOUNDS* I WILL DIE. IT WILL HAPPEN. AND I WANT IT TO BE KNOWN THAT U ARE THE BITCH THAT KILLED ME. *MORE FAKE ZCRYING SOUNDS* I MUST SEND MESSAGES TO ALL MY DEAREST KIND FRIENDS WHO HAVE NEVER FUCKED ME LIKE THIS ALRIGHT *FAKE COUGHING* TELL THEM THAT I *MORE FAKE COUGHOGN* LOVE THEM *THROWS KETCHUP PACKET EVERYWHERE WHILE UR NOT LOOKING AND BUSY BEING WORRIED ABOUT MY HEALTH* AND I WILL REMEMBER THEM EVEN IN DEATH

ANYWAY HERE IS MY WILL:

WHAT U GET:

nothing

u get nothing

bINCH

zero. zip. nada

0 potato 4 u

U CAN HAVE THE SALT FROM MY KITCHEN SO U WILL BE PERPETUALLY REMINDED OF MY LAST EMOTIONS TOWARDS THIS LIFE

maybe like the one half a potato that was randomly in my drIVEWAY THAT ONE TIME 

M A Y B E

WHAT GOOD KIND LOVING FRIENDS, SUCH AS MILS AND FRIED CHAIR AND ELLIE AND OTHER ASSORTED PEOPLES WHICH I SHALL ADDRESS IN CLAUSE 4.20 OF THE TERMS AND CONDITIONS OF MY WILL, GET:

actually mils is a hoe and can choke but u r the evil here rn aND FOR THE PURPOSES OF THIS ARGUMENT WE WILL PRETEND THAT I LIKE MILS

ANYWAY. REALLY GOOD THINGS I OWN

I HAVE SOME SOCKS I DONT WANT U GUYS CAN HAVE THEM

AND LIKE

MY DUVET

SEE GOATY THESE ARE THE KIND OF HEART TOUCHING POST DEATH GIFTS U MISS OUT ON WHEN U MURDER ME IN COLD BLOOD

ALSO NO TOUCHING MY MANGOES THAT I BOUGHT TWO DAYS AGO BECAUSE I STILL WANT TO EAT THEM AND IF ANYONE EVEN BREATHES IN THEIR GENERAL DIRECTION I WILL BEAT THEM UNCONSCIOUS WITH A TELEPHONE THIS IS A T H R E A T

I HOPE UR TAKING NOTES AND I HOPE U FEEL GOOD ABOUT BEING A 6′3 KILLER BECAUSE UR AN ASSHOLE ™LIKE UR ASSHOLIER™ THAN THE REAL ASSHOLE THAT IS JONAH GRIGGS™ THE LABEL™ (COPYRIGHT JONAH GRIGGS™ THE ANT MURDERING HOT PIECE OF ASS™) BUT I WILL DIE FOR U MY GOAT *strokes ur pretty face* BC IT IS UR BIRTHDAY WISH FOR ME TO SUFFER AND I LOVE YOU AND I WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR U THEREFORE . DESPITE THIS SICKNESS *FLAILS* I. WILL. BE. BRAVE. I WILL REBLOG THOSE TWENTY POSTS I WILL FLATLINE BY THE THIRD POST AND MY BLOOD WILL BE ON UR HANDS *CAREFULLY ARRANGES MY STUNT GOAT IN POSITION* AND I WILL BE YELLING CURSES AT YOU IN THE TAGS BUT I WILL DIE IN THE NAME OF HONOUR I WILL GO DOWN AS A GOAT NEVER HAS BEFORE 

BUT LIKE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE YOU AND I I LOVE YOU AND I LOVE YOU AND I LOVE YOU AND I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU SO SO SO SO SO SO SO MUCH YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY FANTASTIC I AM SO HAPPY U EXIST. HAVE THE BOMBEST ASS 17TH BIRTHDAY BABE I HOPE UR PARTY IS LIT AND HAVE FUN GETTING DRUNK AND HAVING ALL THE BANTS AND LAFFS AND ALSO I WILL SEND U THE AWAITED EMAIL IN A FEW HOURS WHEN MY INTERENT IS BACK ON  BECAUSE IT IS A CONTINUATION OF THIS BULLSHIT WITH SOME STRUCTURED DISCUSSION AKA WHAT THE FUCK DO U HAVE AGAINST SMIRNOFF ICE how is it not HARDCORE enough for u IT IS LITERALLY FLAVOURED VODKA DOES IT NOT KNOCK OUT UR 6′3 ASS OR WHAT EXCUSE ME 

ANYWAY IN CONCLUSION.

HAPPY. SEVENTEENTH. BIRTHDAY. MY. CHUM.

*BLOWS U A KISS*

*PUTS ON TWO FÜR COATS TO REMAIN UNDETECTED* 

*STEALS ALL UR WEETBIX AND RUNS AWAY TO ALASKA NEVER TO BE SEEN AGAIN*

*still replies ur emails tho cuz i love u bitch y u do dis to me*

[rockandblognet]

Interview with H.E.A.T.

Rock and Blog Interviews. We talk with Crash of H.E.A.T. about the band and new album «Into the Great Unknown»

«Into the Great Unknown»  is the new album of H.E.A.T. and we talk about it with Crash.

About H.E.A.T

RnB: It seems like yesterday that H.E.A.T was born, but It was ten years ago How would you summarize these last 10 years for the band?

Crash:That´s a good question. Actually we also are very aware that is ten years since we started with the band. But we try not to talk about it (hehehe) too much. You know it feels like yesterday we were 19 years old. But to answer your question. Well we’ve done thousands of shows, we have drink millions of beers and we have released six albums, five studio albums and one live album. We have toured Europe, Japan, China, USA, I think we will go to Australia very soon. We are not puppies anymore.

RnB: You have had some very important changes during these years, but Jona, Jimmi and you have always remained. Can we consider you three, the backbone of the band?

Crash: The whole band is the backbone of the band, buf of course I guess you can say that in someway cos we have been here since start. But also Erik Gronwall is being in the band for 7 years. Still people say he is the new singer, but I think is the same with ACDC, the present singer is the new singer even though he is being in the band for 30 years

RnB: Has Dave’s return to the band been easy? I mean, were any wounds reopened or did everything flow easily?

Crash: No, It was really easy. We know Dave, he Know us. But since he left the band I think we have stepped up. We have more experience, we are more professional now than we were in 2013. So that´s a new thing for him but we are helping him. He´s learning.

RnB: The style of the band has varied over the years from Hard Rock to AOR and exploring other genres. How would you define the style of H.E.A.T.?

Crash: Today? I would say, we play H.E.A.T., that’s our style.

I mean when we started we played melodic rock and AOR with an American sound from the early eighties that’s what we did but then you know somewhere along the way in six albums, ten years later, I think we have found ourselves and who knows what the next album is gonna sound like.

But on this album we’ve done a lot of experimenting with taking our time and we had a lot of fun making this album and we’re really proud of it. we love it .

We think it’s kick-ass and it’s got many different kinds of songs. it’s got close to metal song and also it’s got some retro 80 songs but also It´s got something like I guess you could say melodic Rock 2017 songs.

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RnB: With the previous lead singer leaving and Erik joining the band from a reality show, how has this pushed the band to become even bigger?

Crash: well I think we have worked to get together the past seven years since he joined the band to make it bigger. Of course he’s a great singer and an awesome talent and that has helped but we have worked together to become what we are today.

RnB: But do you think that the fact that Eric came from a reality show was good for the band or was it just the opposite?

Crash: I don’t think it matters. What matters is that he is a great singer yeah and a great frontman . I never thought of the idol thing that shall gave us a positive thing other than when we searched for a singer. It was a really great way to find a good singer. We could see him in interviews, how does he behave on stage, how does he sing different kinds of music so it was the perfect audition for H.E.A.T. that’s how I see it.

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RnB: It seems that the band is at an important turning point. You have had very good numbers with previous albums and ticket sales, and it seems that it is time to take the next step, and to climb some levels in the festival lineups. Do you feel that pressure?

Crash: I understand what you mean but I don’t feel pressure at all. I think it feels like we have an opportunity to take this to the next level and that’s what we’re gonna do.

That’s why we have agreed to let’s up the game and think more as a headline act and bring a bigger production to the audience.

RnB: Before we talked about your 80s influence at the beginning. In our blogs we love to see young people who make rock music with a full eighties style. Does the 80s influence and sound in your music come from a specific inspiration or from personal experience?

At the beginning we all listened to 80s music. That’s the only thing we listen to when we were in our early 20s. There were so many bands for us to discover. We were so young so we’ve found new bands and new types of genres within the melodic rock.

But today it’s more personal. I think we have so many inspiration in the backpack, you know, so we can use that to find inspiration within ourselves.

About «Into de Great Unknown»

RnB:The new album is different from previous ones and although there are still many days before its release to the public, some critics have already been ranting and raving about it. Does this make you concerned about how fans might react to it when it drops?

Crash: It has been a long time to make a baby, but so this is our baby. We love it and we hope that our fans will love it too

RnB: Those critics were perhaps expecting an album with similar sound and style to your previous ones, and they were surprised by the change. We know it’s hard to please everyone. If you continue with the same style some people complain about a lack of ingenuity, and if you innovate and change, others complain that you are abandoning your original style. How does affect the band´s direction?

Crash: I think it’s a human thing, fear of the unknown and that’s where we’ve gone we’re going on into the great unknown

I know what you talk about I’ve read some some comments on social media and so on and I’m just amazed that people care so much about this band. It seems like heat means a lot to a lot of the people and that makes us all very glad. they say.

it’s just proves to us that heat means a lot to, a lot of people that really have a lot of feelings. I think that’s a lot better than nobody giving a fuck okay.

I could argue with them or against them. “Redefined” I think that song could fit perfectly on address the nation our third album .yeah I mean listen to the song, it’s also like a slick production a lot of melodies not so much attitude but with a popular attitude.

And also the first song on the new album bastards of society it could fit perfectly into tearing down the walls in my opinion

  RnB: Regarding the new album. It’s clear that you have decided to experiment with new sounds. How has Dave contributed to experimenting with these new sounds?

Crash: He has played all guitars

When he joined the band we had been we had been working on the album for more than a year already. But he did his fair share of contributing.

We all do when we record it and when we do the pre-production we all help out too to make every song like as cool as possible. So we all have suggestions here and there, and if everyone’s happy we do it. That way so this is a project of us five working together.

RnB: Are you trying to reach an audience that is not just the Hard Rock audience?

Crash: I don’t think we’re trying to reach we did this album for ourselves. We did the album that we wanted to write

RnB: What was the creation process of this album like? I mean, how long did it take? And How did each band member contribute to the process?

Crash: When we released the album tearing down the walls, we did a lot and a lot of touring. We played many many many shows. And somewhere  along the way we felt that to continue touring we have to make an even better album. So we decided to not alive show until the new album is out. And that’s what we did. So the last alive show we did with H.E.A.T. was in Tokyo, September 2015. Two years ago. That´s the time it took to create this new album until we were satisfied. I think this is a luxury that not many bands have. We really took tie off to make a killer album, our best one.

The beginning went like into a black hole, because we were not releasing anything and not playing any live shows, so we slowly faded away. Shortly after that Eric left the band and we had a problem in our rehearsal place so all instruments was drowned with water…

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So at the beginning of the songwriting period things didn’t seen too great. We felt like we were in an imaginary city where everything was unfair and nothing was going our way,  so that’s when we wrote the song shit city. And after that song was written everything went easier cuz we felt this song is cool to write more songs.

I think most of theses songs are actually inspired by these two years itself for example “Bastards of Society”:

—- first saw their line fire me up

and I’ll burn the Sun

I come loaded with a million guns

and that’s how we feel today that’s how —-

We feel now this we haven’t played for a long time and we’ve got a killer album and we’re all fired up and we got a million guns and here we come.

  Next H.E.A.T. Tour

RnB: You already have some concerts planned for this fall. Can we expect a big tour?

Crash: We’re gonna start with a great European tour. We’re gonna come to Spain I don’t think the dates are official and set yet but you will find the dates very soon. We will announce European tour and of course will come at Spain. Spain is one of the best countries to to play. That´s why me and Jona have learned a little bit of language. We love the Spanish culture and food and all the Spanish people.

RnB: Are there any Festival in your tour plans for next summer?

Crash: Yeah, we’re gonna have a fall tour before the year ends just to promote the new album and next year we’re aiming for the festivals during all summer

Time to talk a little bit about Crash, H.E.A.T.´s drummer

RnB: Who are your favorite drummers or those who have inspired you the most?

Crash: The most all right I’ll say Vinnie Paul of Pantera I think he has a great way of playing. Then you have Mike Portnoy ex Dream Theater as well I’ve learned a lot from him. I can say name so many drummers, Simon Phillips as well actually I met Simon Phillips and he it taught me a few tricks in a minute lesson and also I’d like to mention Lars Ulrich. That’s a drummer that most people think is a crappy drummer but I think it’s is more to a drummer than just play drums. I think if you’re on stage you’re there to entertain and he’s a great entertainer

RnB:What is your current drumset

Crash: I have a TAMA STARCLASSIC

RnB: what music do you listen to?

Crash: Highly I like to listen to well mostly Swedish hardrock all the new bands Art Nation, eclipse but also I’ve learned to appreciate classical music during the these past two years, and Beethoven 14th Sonata is my favorite

RnB: What was the first live concert you attended to, as an audience?

Crash: It was a Swedish rock and roll by that’s called Jerry Williams and I think he’s 70 years old today

RnB: What was the first record you bought?

Crash: I think it was an Iron Maiden. I don’t know the actual name of the disc but it was a greatest hits or collection album

RnB:Who first turned you into loving rock and roll?

Crash: Good question, originally it was my dad he has always loved Deep Purple and he´s been a great 70s rock fan.

But actually it was Jimmy James fault that I started playing drums because he had a band and they didn’t have drummer, and my dad’s a drummer he’s always been so Jimmy asked me hey Crash you can you can start playing drums with us,  we got a show in two weeks. I had never touched the drums but that’s that’s how I started playing drums.

Ok, that’s all Crash, Thank you very much and we hope to see you soon here in Spain.

Si lo prefieres pudes leer esta entrevista en castellano aquí

Interview with H.E.A.T. was originally published on Rock and Blog

[blumingtoadstool]

I’m not gonna shut up about Mouthwashing for a while, so here’s my thoughts on Curly’s hallucinations when he’s on his way to give Jimmy his psych eval.

My interpretation of this is that this Curly’s whole arc summed up into one scene.

We don’t know anything about him other than he’s a well respected captain, meaning he’s been in space for a while. Him walking around, admiring the beauty of the stars is him just enjoying his job as he’s climbing the ranks.

Then we get the first warning messages. This is either when Jimmy and Curly first met, or at the very least when Curly got Jimmy a job on the Tulpar. There’s a few warning signs that’s relatively easy for Curly to ignore and walk past, like how he shrugs off Jimmy’s behaviour or helps defuse situations without disturbing the peace.

We can assume Jimmy was a problem before everything unraveled, and Curly was always there to calm everyone down without addressing any issues.

This is where we get to the main story. As said in the game, Curly feels like he’s reached the top rung on his career’s ladder, and he’s not sure where to go from here.

Meanwhile, the warning signs he’s ignoring are getting bigger.

This is probably the days leading up to the crash. Now that the truth is out about Pony Express shutting down, Curly’s thinking even more about what’s next for him. He’s at the top of the ladder, but if everything is becoming automated, where does that leave him? Despite Jimmy’s outburst at the party, we don’t know for sure if Curly’s got a secure job to head to next, and Curly probably doesn’t either.

Speaking of Jimmy, the warning signs are getting bigger and more frequent. From Jimmy’s outburst at the party, him being blatantly jealous about how Curly is such a beloved captain, to the fact that Curly knows about Anya’s pregnancy. She told him about Jimmy attacking her (another warning signs he ignored) and now he’s got a predicament he can’t just ignore.

Curly knows Jimmy. That’s why he let Anya keep the gun hidden. Because he knows Jimmy won’t react well.

And finally this scene. The culmination of Curly’s mistakes. There are no more warning signs, because the danger’s right in front of his face. Jimmy’s crashed the ship.

He’s still thinking of where he could have gone after Pony Express. All of the other ladders he could have climbed. But that’s not possible.

Because of his inaction to stop his monster of a friend, now he’s staring face to face with a giant fireball.