#proud bc it end up kinda aesthetic??? ^^

[wonyopout]

thinking about a very cute submissive babygirl princess wony, just like this aesthetic of rolarola's ads 🤤 she's playing all innocent while begging you to spank her pussy ughhh asking you to be rough with her because when you fuck her hard it creates a huge belly bulge and she loves staring at it 😭 and then you're so proud that she can handle your thick big cock so you fill her up to the brim with your cum and she gets even more babygirl with you FAWWKKKKKKKKKKK DASKJIOJIJK

ohhh babygirl wony we love u we rlly do, kinda got rlly into the spanking part like i just need to see her covered in hand prints and teary eyed i need to write more wonyoung + impact play, but anywhooo hope u like it anon took a few creative liberties n its a lil short but this got me outta my writing funk yayyy

[cw]: g!p fem reader, impact play, mommy kink, dacyriphilia sorta kinda

listen, wonyoungs always been very playful with you, all bark and no bite. just wanting to go far enough to tease you and get you just a tiny bit annoyed with her, loves that you start getting short with her and the tone of your voice drops ever so slightly. biting her lip and squeezing her thighs together, embarrassed by how much the shift in your mood is affecting her. shes still your baby tho so more than anything she loves when you dote on her, telling her how pretty she looks for you hehe. The second she sees that you’re actually starting to get pissed she starts acting all sweet and pouting at you. always saying the most sinful things with the most innocent look on her face, things like “you can touch me whenever you want” and “want your cock to split me open, please” with her signature eye smile as if what she just said isn’t making you painfully hard 😵‍💫

she really is a sweetie at heart but she’s always up to something.. glancing at you every now and then before finally waltzing up to you and plopping down on your lap. kissing softly across your neck and jawline (wony is definitely pushy and needy when it comes to kissing) before slotting her knee between yours, grinding down against your knee. 

“wan’ you to fuck me please mommy, want you to spank my cunt till its raw and-“

not even letting her finish her sentence before you’re almost knocking her over with how quickly you stand up, dragging her by the arm to your bedroom and pushing her towards the bed. 

yanking at the front of her button up baby tee, hearing her whine about how she doesn’t want you to rip it but you really could not care less about that  right now 😭 wonyoung gasping when you start landing slaps against her now exposed tits, arching up into your touch. your hand coming down harshly against her chest again and again, her tits bright red as she throws her head back in a moan. tears flowing down her cheeks as you play with her sensitive nipples, pinching the buds between your fingers. pulling her by the ankles toward the end of the bed n making her skirt ride up putting her soaked panties on display.

it starts out playfully enough. swatting at her ass and thighs that are on display thanks to that ridiculously short skirt she’s wearing (it’s one of your favorites). wonyoung giggling, bottom lip caught between her teeth when you ask,

“wore this for me didn’t you?”

grabbing you by the wrist to place your hand against her,  

“be rough please, wanna be sore afterwards”

Practically tearing what little clothes she has on off of her after that and immediately spanking her Hard across her leaking pussy, body jerking sharply when you land a slap against her clit 😵‍💫 letting your hand rest against her bare pussy for a few seconds after each slap 

“keep your legs spread, doll”

the slaps on her cunt getting increasingly rougher, wonyoung mumbling out ‘sorrys’ every time she accidentally closes her legs bc of the pain 🥺 resorting to holding the backs of her knees to keep her legs open, making it all that much easier to spank her aching clit. quietly hiccuping as fat tears roll down her cheeks, the poor baby. moaning and shaking all the same bc it just hurts so good,

“awe hurts huh baby?” there are tears in her eyes as wonyoung nods at your words. “you’re gonna cum though. gonna cum from the pain, slut??” the question makes her nod her head faster before letting out a sob. she’s getting to the end of her rope, the desperation to cum continuing to build. 

drool spilling out of wonyoungs mouth, the obscene sound your hand makes as it comes in contact with her wet cunt and her whines filling the room, pussy all red and abused, your dick straining against your compression shorts at the sight 😵‍💫 alternating between slapping her pussy and her thighs has her mumbling incoherently,

“please- fuck- please need you inside me, pleasepleaseplease-”

You really can’t deny her when she’s begging so nicely 🥺 wonyoungs pupils blown wide when you finally start to strip, grabbing at your waist when you slot your dick between her folds, crying in relief when you finally bottom out and setting a punishing pace 🥴 wonyoung begging you not to stop inbetween sobs, mouth hanging open as she watches the bulge in her tummy appear and disappear as you piston your dick into her. body going slack when you move her into a mating press position, wonyoung almost screams your hand comes into contact with her swollen clit, playing with the spent bundle of nerves 🫠 her moaning when you praise her for how well she’s taking you, promising to fill her up as a reward for how well she’s doing,,

“mommys gonna breed you full m’kay, bunny”

placing her ankles on your shoulders, her legs shaking from the angle making you piston yourself even deeper inside the knot in your stomach growing with each stroke. wonyoungs cunt clamping down around your cock, whining out a drawn out “fuckfuckfuck” as she squirts 🥴 one hand around her neck while you keep fucking into her, finally coming undone and filling her up like you promised, pressing down on her lower tummy n watching your cum spill out of her spent hole while she looks up at you doe eyed and everything ackk

[too-many-rooks]

Spoiler warning: Long rambly notes I took while watching season 3, disclaimer that a lot of this is just character moments/lines I found interesting and initial bones of an au idea for a burgeoning, extremely self indulgent slightly-darker-Alex in season 3 wip I’ve started.

Also it was the middle of the night and I was very tired and wired out of my gourd on some mix of cheap white wine and floods of hyperfixation-sourced dopamine. Also also I only started taking notes at ep 3?

Episode 3

Alex is SUCH a better spy this season than when he began even in the first few episodes prior to SCORPIA training he’s more careful and precise and the team feels better organised - he did so well on that boat I’m so proud of my baby

I’m actually enjoying Tom and Kyra fucking about more than I expected. Tom pulling Kyra together after the boat explosion suprised me by how emotive it was. But I do want them to.. go away. Alex should more isolated/desperate/have NO other choices than SCORPIA.

Everything in Malagosto seems so staged to just see how Alex will react to it all - here’s an unlocked door, here’s an Alex sized vent and a dead spot in the cameras, what are you gonna do about it? +Alex absolutely speaks French I think he’s just not giving that away yet

Oh yes yes lingering bad touch from Julia Rothman hitting the right notes even though that costume is a WILD kaftan moment. Evil carmen sandiago/noir femme fatale aesthetic where are you I miss you so much

Ohhhh Julia saying Ian walked away and abandoned him and that was what hit him worst oh my goooooooooood

(Outfit change from julie mean day change or is she just a multiple outfits a day kinda person. Believable, I guess)

Julia’s gaslighting I ssoooo crazy ‘we trust you. We want you.’ After having his closest people not trust him, and now maybe questioning if Ian even wanted him!

Julia fucking loved this, she’s totally thrilled by her own power. Queen 👸🏻.

God Jones and the department is going THROUGH IT THIS SEASON, just suddenly surrounded by corpses

Julia : offers irrefutable proof, upsets him, then presses him to continue believing what he did before and belittling his objections - very subtle but more firm tone of voice, less motherly/accepting, very clear that the noose around Alex’s neck is always there.

She’s so delighted at the prospect of making Alex into the perfect soldier

Julia: “I want you to meet your tutor”

Me: ‘here he here he comes here he comes.’ And then I threw of my blanket, pushed myself onto my knees, and started bouncing and palm clapping in sheer delight. I basically never happy stim like this but MY GOD the flood of dopamine is IMMENSE.

More manic laughter at the start of episode 4 realising I’m about to see John and young Yassen. Nicuragua! 18 years ago!

God nervous baby Yassen with a gun

HES!! SO!!! BABY!!!

Baby boy already got his colour scheme locked down

Baby Yassen has curls - is it just the humidity or maybe does he have naturally curly hair that he straightens so he looks less cute?

Johns actor has a real resemblance to Ian (and Jack Lowden) but less so to otto

Ohoho scar moment scar moment bc Yassen was nervous and fucked up two people one bullet

“Close your eyes” as I tell these people I’m going to shoot you and have faith

God cut to adult Yassen WATCHING ALEX SLEEP LOOKING SO INTENSE

“Leave the past behind us.” “Ian rider was a professional. It was not personal it was my job.” “Think of this as a school and your dead by the end of the day” (actual honesty for the first time)

Alex not committing to being able to work with Yassen is perfect

Yassen taking Alex TO HIS KNEES so easily besties not been slowed down too much by a bullet to the chest

Soaking wet!!!!!!!!

Alex shooting scene amazing, as was Yassen bursting into his room immediately after for a murder pep talk. Alex has no privacy privileges from Yassen

Yassen removing the humanity from his targets, names/faces/lives are irrelevant, they are just blank targets. “One day you’ll have to murder them.”

“That’s not gonna happen”

Yassen *be so ffr rn face*

Really interesting to see the other side of the department covering up an agent death and lying to the family - I like the department with more humanity/emotional resonance than pure ruthlessness

Shitty Malagosto communal dorm room and matching drab grey hoodies my beloved

Shame there’s no ‘your not afraid of a little prick are you?’ ‘I wouldn’t call you that’ line. (But switching out the ‘getting vaccinated will implant you with secret nano tech that will kill you’ plottline probs a good idea)

Ooooh Julia creepily poisoning him so excited making me think of her delighting in drugging him in a cocktail of ‘let me take care of you’ ways

Yassen pulling rank to break up the fight!!

Ooh Nile wants to take down Yassen so bad.

Toms film skills coming in clutch recording/ documenting things so Alex will be taken seriously, glad to see him be… less of a dead weight to the team

Begrudgingly-impressed-at-Alex Yassen, even with the “come on that’s a bad idea”, “yeah, but!” Teenagerisms

Yassen’s core (suppressed) emotions: fear, doubt, panic

Alex: love, hope, friendship (okay dear, 🙄 but remember you’re literally becoming an assassin why are you so niave all of a sudden?)

Alex insisting John saved him bc he had compassion and was his friend and that Yassen’s rejection of that makes him lonely oh oh my heart my heart

I LOVE how much fun Nile has being evil at his job of threatening children.

Episode 5

Oh my god HIT HIM ALEX where do you think you are? How do you think you’ll actually manage to get those trainees to trust you? Stop whining and hit the man with a wooden sword, christ

Smithers (in reference to Alex) “he’s out there being a teenager because of us” *cut to Alex, very much in danger, contemplating his capacity to kill*

Julia: “no one leaves,” [scorpia, me, interchangeable to her]

mission with Yassen!

Packing for the mission with Yassen!!!

Yassen can’t read his handwriting!!!

“You’ve put… lockpick?”

“I left my last one in Nile. “

Alex bitching about his meagre gadgets at point Blanc 💯

Matching tactical turtlenecks!!!

“I don’t want you to fail. I don’t want you to die.”

Alex and Yassen are a team but Yassen gives Alex command of them oh boysieeeee

Again glad they dropped the vaccine bit: vaccines aren’t dangerous, but vaping is!!

Of on a road trip with Yassen!!

A murder road trip!

Love Kyra seeing the shot and the body - I know why it didn’t happen but I do kinda wish for a more corrupted violent Alex coerced/bargained into firing it himself

That Tom confrontation was great - I do want to see it as like a ‘your getting in my way’ intentional cruelty to push him away and keep him safe when Alex is too deep in SCORPIA to be deluded about thinking he can go home

Alex rejects intimacy with Julia and she cracks down her authority ‘no one leaves’

Ep 6

Love Alex spooky in the cemetery, SCORPIA hot on his heels

Sharing a grotty safe house together god SO GOOD

“We trust each other. You should try it sometime.”

“If it’s not emotional why do you do it?”

“Because it’s my job. (Identity/life/personal connections/sacrificed everything for) I work for SCORPIA. I’m good at it. You could be too.” Olive branch of intimacy - wants alex to be more like him, so they can be equals, can share this life that he apparently finds satisfaction in, not thinking or making decisions beyond how best to achieve his goal/finish the task(/order)assigned to him/subject himself to feeling emotions/thinking about his life beyond his attempts to depersonalise himself as just a weapon - just a professional with no emotions, and that that is fundamentally who he is. Evidently having some inconvenient feelies about Alex tho.

Oh no his delivery disguise makes him look like a caveman. Glad he took off the accessories for the Jones confrontation, his hair actually looks great there all tousled. (Beginning to realise how important characters hair is to me bc I still hate Julia’s I want some dark perfect waves this Bob is ough)

I’m really glad they settled on Yassen NOT knowing about John - he twists it that John didn’t betray him bc he had nothing to gain from being kind to him, so it wasn’t false, but he is so 100% loyal to John, eager to twist any criticism. I do wish we’d seen more of their relationship, but expecting some Russian roulette bits was overly optimistic

“I know my place” he’s IMMEDIATELY off to rescue his boy (actually, where did he go? All of that last episode I was just WHAT ABOUT YASSEN? Was he just plotting a rescue that didn’t need to happen and waiting for his boy to show up?)

Dare I say… good for blunt? Stephen dillane is just so charming I can’t help but like him. And you see some flashes of his ruthlessness like when he talks to Greif but he’s not a 24/7 conniving monster. Also Jones in charge and Alex possibly (definitely) returning to spy work in a couple of years? I like that. Totally abandoning it would have felt unsatisfying.

Loved that moment on the roof - missed opportunity for them to awkwardly wave at each other, but I’m so happy I predicted wrongly and Yassen gets to live and walk away and put down his weapons. There’s so much space for how they can reconnect in that.

[kairiscorner]

Could you possibly write hcs for Ben Reilly with a goth, black cat reader who's somewhat of an antihero in his universe? Very chill and introverted to contrast with his dramatic angst self lol

(Love your writing sm, hope all is well :D)

HELLOOOOOO fuck, i love that wHATTT yes please <333 i hope you like this !!

(reblogs are greatly appreciated, it helps get my content out there! if you guys like what you see, please reblog it too <:D)

btw, i made some space for ben reilly fics here on my taglist, you can drop your user to be updated on fics i drop about our blonde sweetie o(*≧▽≦)

i think the first time you guys met would be when he would be assigned to contain an anomaly that made its way into his universe, but when he was struggling to beat it, you managed to subdue it almost immediately–and nonchalantly yk, like it's a normal day for you to be taking down villains that have wreaked havoc in your city but in a different font.

"yo, not cool, but... really kinda cool though... who are you?" he'd ask you as you kinda whisk him away from the fallen villain (carrying him bridal style bc that is the only right way to hold my baby boy) "not a friend." you'd reply as you drop him to the ground. "ow. you are... quite the formidable foe, then." "would a foe have saved your blonde ass?" "okay, fair point."

he's been looking forward to seeing you ever since you saved him, trying to one-up you and save you and have you think of him as often as he thought of you after he met you :>

he noticed that you had a pretty goth aesthetic, so he...... he kinda changed his wardrobe to a more black and gray kind of apparel to match with you, or whatever colors you like to use! the point is, he wants, so badly, to match with you <33

he would be patrolling in areas he'd sense you were at and just swing over to you, kinda perch next to you as you watch lounge about, just minding your own business.

"hey..." he'd nudge you as you scoot away from him, with him following you and scooching over to you as you moved away. "i really like your... outfit." "thanks." a silence befalls you two as he thinks of what to say, he's never been this close to anyone before (though you two aren't really that close yet) "you look so... pulchritudinous." he murmurs as you look at him with perplexity in your eyes. "pulchri... what?" "it's a big word that basically means... you look beautiful. i thought you'd like it, um, i mean... i knew you'd like it, i, uh, caught you reading poetry the other... nevermind." he shut himself up before he could continue exposing himself to you.

when he gets a small wound from the villain, he clings on to you and """wails""" about how this is the end of ben reilly! the end of... you two... you push him off you as he asks himself why that didn't work, usually people would love to kiss his booboos :(

when he told you he was admitted into the spider society, he had expected you to be much more proud of him, but seeing you be so chill about it kinda disappointed him. "aren't you proud? i'm with the greats!" "i am, just... i don't know. it'll mean you won't always be here with me, will you?" you ask him with a tone of longing he had never heard come from you before. at that, he immediately wraps his arms around you and SOBS. "BABE I WILL ALWAYS COME BACK, I PROMISE...! I'LL LEAVE THEM IF IT MEANS I WON'T BE WITH YOUUUUUUU......" he sniffles into your shoulder as he cries about the thought of him leaving you for a long while eats away at him. even through your comforting, he's determined to make sure he comes home and stays with you, even if you insist you'll be fine on your own.

[trainingdummyrabbit]

okok. more canto6 thoughts now that ive had time to think abt it

ill be real, i dont think this one was for me! it was fun n all, but im thinking less about The Actual Chapter and more about The Things Around It. ill admit, im not rrrrreally that big on solidly romantic stories the way heath/cathy did it. what gets me about those two is the undying loyalty and self-destructive nature of them, the lengths theyre willing to go. but its more in how it defines Them than it does Their Bond, if that makes sense.

. and yeah i Did kinda go 'Ah. Of Course.' at the 'they just didnt talk to each other :(' thing. like i get it, i respect it, but also iiiiii just dont like those, personally. i like how it defines heathcliffs character and his dual-running fear and avoidance, but god.... man. the door scene was kinda frustrating dkjfgnkdjf

i think nelly can do whatever she wants forever.

i still dont know what happens in leviathan but that was cool, verg. im glad im getting t see more of him this way bc the only thing i have on his Character Notes Totally Real is "was mean to donqui once" and well. well! (<- oversimplification for comedic effect)

i like the aesthetic of the chapter, a lot of it was really fun. they SUPER lost me early-to-mid part 3 though what the Fuck are you all talking about. i probably just need to Actually Catch Up but they Really kicked the door down w that one. iwas expecting distortion!heath to be a bigger deal, but alas. no self-destructive not-catharsis pupy for me. shame.

i do really like how heathcliffs character bloomed though. all i ever really got to see of him beforehand was 'angry guy' and 'prime ship material' (which isnt his fault at all) so im glad he got a lot of stuff to work with. i like him just fine :) im especially glad a lot of the softer bits of him were emphasized-- it works well with him. that hand in hand with the dichotomy of how hes treated vs how cathy sees him (<- thinks abt the song ok thinks really hard ill get there) and like. i just like seeing that he is cared for and appreciated. im forever going to be thinking about "my heathcliff" from dante-- its the multiverse thing yeah but also It Isnt. To Me. Thats Their Heathcliff. Our Heathcliff. Thats Our Guy!!!

(one day ill get to digging into c5.5 and its tie in with c6, the dante-donqui-heath dynamic means a lot to me in a way i cant describe yet.)

im not going to talk abt the hermannsgroup lore because i dont understand and i havent actually met her yet. you understand. it has gone fully and completely over my head and i dont want t do it a disservice just because im confused. 👍

i didnt see nelly coming from a mile away which is Very funny bc there was a 'if you die nelly i swear to god i will fucking Get you.' right before the reveal KSJGNKDJG;; n honestly. yeah girl kill. do what you want. reasonable response for watching two people you care about tiptoe-dance around each other accidentally making each other worse in a spiral of misery and all you can do is watch and ineffectively try to help because theyre. theyre Them. worlds most painful will-they-wont-they you are contractually obligated to watch. that is so funny. she can do whatever she wants forever.

Why Does Erlking Heath Act Like That. Why Does He Sound Like That.

Dante Can Just Do That ?? good for them. im proud of them.

anyway. the song. gonna go fucking insane over this for a while, ok? milisong contractual obligation. im SO GLAD it ended up being a segmented duet, the way each piece sounds so empty without the other is so. fucking good. the dichotomy between resignation and yearning kills. SO hard. ("hello / goodnight, goodbye / hello.." explodes.)

milis range REALLY gets to shine here and im SO into it. the imagery of a single-sided dance struck between shots is SUCH. GOOD FRAMING. UGH.

and the lines here, throwing back to a previous point:

..as if cathy is gently correcting heathcliff's lamenting as he speaks, entirely unheard, unfelt. (i cant quite recall if we actually get to hear cathy's side during the first appearance of the track... but that hits; yeah;)

and then, later on, the "delete" interlude-- its cathy who begins the march First, on the forward beat. heathcliff's end kicks in on the back beat, almost as if following, pulled along; building up momentum as each end pushes each other forward. cathy's seems laced with Choice, a necessary sacrifice-- and heathcliffs rings almost empty, something he simply Must Do.

, the completely simultaneous "how could i know?" hurt.

motherfuckers really using each others image to hurt themselves huh..... grabbing and SHAKING them. oh my god. and most importantly:

the message is that they LOVE YOU, IDIOT !!!!!!!!

heathcliff being symbolized as a flower means the whole world to me, is what im saying.

the fact that the entire thing rings of motion with every step, ebbs and flows as if waiting for a partner to pick up that cast-- how empty it feels without the other to compliment it.

the setup for the entire final fight was Phenomenal. im always a sucker for duets, and they manifested that Perfectly. cathys design kills me and im mad about it and if you know you know because ive already yelled at you about it by now. fine FINE maybe im BIASED. itsnot MY fault they keep doing this 2 me!!!!!!!!

. "im clearing the cathys" was supposed to be a JOKE.

why did we just Delete A Person?????? another 'im not gonna talk abt it because ill do a disservice via confusion' but HUH??? HUH HUH??????? WHAT?????????????

ill give it one thing though, i Am obsessed with the "they were always destined to break each others' hearts" aka "This Shit Just Keeps Happening" throughline, something something Death Will Not Do Us Part You Stupid Fucking Idiot(tm). its Deeply funny and equal parts compelling and frustrating.

this one. this one was a lot, basicaly, a lot more than i thought theyd do; some of it hit some of it didnt, but i just think heath and cathy are neat :] i would love to try to dig into cathys mess sometime, but ill be real. i probably wont get anywhere with it <//33

nelly can do whatever she wants forever.

[butch-reidentified]

i know it’s none of my business, but if you mind sharing, why did you get top surgery? i haven’t heard of any woman who has gotten it for reasons further than being transgender (or medical ones)

I dont mind; it's just a bit complex and hard to communicate. I've found that whenever I try to on here, people end up misinterpreting a lot of it. I'm willing to try tho, esp since I've previously talked about it only in specific contexts and not just discussed all the reasons.

I had a few reasons, and part of it was medical (primarily bc of constant painful cysts), and I did have what I think may be a version of "sex dysphoria" (tho I'm not 100% bc other ppl describe sex dysphoria so differently & I didn't have body image issues or care how I looked to others or in the mirror) where my breasts felt (felt as in a literal physical sensation) like a prosthesis that I was wearing all the time. I had genuinely gorgeous, ideal-by-societal-standards breasts, and I actually quite liked them aesthetically. but they got in the way a lot and caused all the usual issues that large breasts do, so I was gonna get a reduction regardless. I was kinda like, why not go all the way and then I won't have to deal with cysts or that odd sensation I mentioned? I think it kind of comes down to that + the fact I knew I'd enjoy being a butch woman with a flat chest.

but then I also kind of got this sense of amusement from the idea of removing from existence a pair of breasts that sooo many people who saw them called flawless, just because they were "too perfect for this world to have." that's now the reason I give men who ask me about it, bc the reactions are honestly priceless.

I did a whole ton of research, including a lot of exploring stories of women who regretted doing this for the pupose of checking my motivations for pursuing it, my external and internal contexts around it, and my thought process and actual process I had designed for myself to complete before "clearing" myself to go forward with it - the idea being if any of those were a match with anything I read in a regret testimony, I would not move forward. I did therapy as well, specifically not affirming and with the woman who was my therapist after surviving the Pulse shooting in 2016, who I trust and respect deeply and who is not particularly on board with trans stuff or the new brand of "feminism." And I waited over 4 years from when I first thought about it to do all the above, and so it wouldn't be at all impulsive as I'd had a lot of time to dig deep, analyze, try other options, and really think hard about it/how I'd feel. And so I'd be old enough that my prefrontal cortex was more or less done cooking 😅

I'm not really sure either way if I would do it now if I still had them, but that's only bc I'm informed about the cosmetic surgery industry now in ways I wasn't then, and as a result, I'm opposed to giving that industry my money. But it would still be a tough call if I'm honest. I really like the way my chest is now. I'm quite happy with it and find it much more convenient in several ways, so I couldn't honestly say I have any regrets about it.

I truly had zero desire to be viewed as a man or "nonbinary" and went a bit overboard making sure people knew that for a while after my surgery. My misandry runs too deep to ever not love being a woman, no matter what the world is like, if I'm honest. I am so madly in love with womanhood and sisterhood and being a lesbian and female solidarity and devoting my life, body and "soul," to women's liberation. It's my cardinal raison d'être. And I do think there's some good can be done by an extremely gnc woman with no breasts who's loud and proud about being a woman.

[ursogoldenn]

october 6, 2024 dear diary...

sooo i kinda forgot to do one of these for yesterday and friday so this is kinda for all the three day weekend. friday was productive!! i woke up i think around 9?? and then i did my chem homework which is the left pic i tried to take an aesthetic picture of it lol. then i did some english stuff and caught up on anything else. then i just kinda sat around. i finished the outline for one of my books so i need to start writing it- i wrote 2 books in 2023 and theres NO WAY im coming out of 2024 without writing another. november is coming up and i need to start because nanowrimo!! even tho theyre pro ai :/ so i have to find an alternative im still gonna do the 50k words in a month thing. and then yesterday was meh, i didnt do much. mostly just sat around. then today i woke up at 12 again :( i got up and got ready cuz my friend and i were gonna go thrift shopping but her mom said no because she couldnt drive us (neither of us have our licence YET) and she didnt want us walking anywhere because its too hot?? and i think its dumb really bc yeah it was like 98 degrees but that weather is normal here and we walk around in that heat all the time?? plus my friend is a runner so she RUNS in this weather, plus we wanted to go walk to froyo so it wouldnt even be that bad. but WHATEVER she ended up coming over and we did each others hair and i taught her something on the piano and we just kinda hung out. and then yeah im all caught up on weekened hw, my spanish teacher FINALLY put in the grade for the quiz and i got 40/43!! not 100% but i'll take what i can get. then we have a chem test on wednesday, i need to lock in and study because i dont understand chem and my grade is barely hanging on to an 80%... my teacher is really nice though she said if i still dont understand after this then she'll help me individually and go over things at lunch or something. so yeah im looking forward to this week- and only 11 more days until my concert!!! im sooo exctied to see conan yayayaya

proud of myself for: doing all weekend homework on friday looking forward to: taking pics in photography class tomorrow song stuck in my head: sweater weather by the neighborhood

[gracebethartacc]

I’ve been seeing ppl when making their HMS designs usually point out design details and I didn’t initially do that w mine when I posted them so uh better late than never ig!

Gonna repost the designs here just for reference: 

Ok on to the notes!:

Heart: 

-circles/round shapes 

-fluffy/poofy hair 

-more casual/comfy clothes (almost like a pajama look?) 

-black as a accent color to act as a call back to that originally being his color 

-lots of heart shapes (the sides of his shoes, shoe laces being loopy rather than the X shape I usually do to make a heart style shape, the tie on his sweatpants etc etc)

-stitches/rag doll aesthetic (nod to the “tore me at the seams” line, also just because I personally associate stitches with hearts?? No reason idk just an unconscious thing ? Maybe it can be seen as a foil to mind being robotic and heart being “soft”? Idk there’s definitely symbolism to it I’m just too stupid to articulate it sorry lol 

-blindfold is expressive/works as an emoter/has sonic eyes logic, just bc I think it’s really fun to draw, he can be cartoony, as a treat.

-eyes start like the others (white w black/dark iris) but after going blind the colors inverse (black with white iris) (OMG LIKE IN FNAF!???!?🤯)

-purple heart shaped pupils 

-wings optional I’m still debating on them BUT I’m definitely making it be so him and mind get a angel and devil on the shoulder theme (plus the added thing about heart playing the victim “perfect little angel who can do no wrong” and how he vilifies and (quite literally in this case) demonizes Mind) 

-bleed from chest

Mind:

-square shapes

-hair slicked back rather than in his face like the others

-collared shirt under sweater to give a more presentable vibe

-platform boots to make him taller/give him the superiority complex (plus they look cool that too lol) 

-necklace is a brain because …you know…. mind (made my designs before the Q&A revealed what the necklace actually was, so jus’ took creative liberty, plus so him being the representation of the mind was more visually shown considering how heavily I plastered hearts and eyes on Heart and Soul lol (I’m just gonna say the irl/drum stick necklace can be part of my CJ/Whole design instead)) 

-YOU UNDERSTAND MECHANICAL HANDS ARE THE RULER OF EVERYTHING ok but seriously: robotic design just in general, I really like his split on the top head I’m proud of that idea lol (actually if it’s not obvious but I tried to give all of them some form of… something going on with their faces!! So hearts stitches minds bolts and souls half and half you get it) 

-blue square pupils, it’s hard to make out unless you zoom in but I give him android style eyes (those lines going from the corners of his pupil to his iris, kinda like how portal does it?? I don’t remember oof but that almost like— camera zooming in kind of look? That, I was going for that)) 

-like heart, his old color (white) acts as an accent color 

-would have bat wings as previously mentioned to insinuate demon motif 

-bleed from head

Soul:

-triangles/sharp/pointed shapes 

-combo of both half and half and gray colors 

-almost like?? Punk style clothing? 

-patches on jacket (a crown, upside down cross, eye, eclipse, trident, and heart respectively) (the cross was semi a nod to hokum all ye faithful just bc I like that cover a lot personally lol) 

-messier hair

-halo intended to resemble rope/noose but idk how obvious I made it idk ??

-shadow half of face to reference the CCCC cover art and their appearance in light/night 

-the extra eyes are optional/at will 

-more a lore thing but I HC the “shadowy form” was originally an at will thing when he became mad, but after some particularly bad day it ends up getting stuck like that

-gets a more biblically accurate angle style appearance (eye motif/body horror/halo etc) Soul is the god to Heart and Minds shoulder angel and devil if you get what I mean (both to nod to the general concept of the soul being rooted heavily in religion as well as two wuv and the soul electric) 

-red ring shaped pupil to insinuate a halo shape

-half and half wings 

-bleed from eye (eyes are the windows to the soul/angle motif/soul always watching and having to keep an eye on H&M) 

Whole: 

Wasn’t going to mention him considering I literally just… drew Chonny from TMR and that’s it lmao?? But eh might as well mention him while I’m here

-regular shaped pupils (static colored)

-tally hall color nail polish (nod to the CCCC cover art)

-hair is more naturally drawn rather than stylized/shaped 

-white sweater to act as an inverse to HMS all having black/dark colored sweaters

-similar shoes to Heart, half and half jacket to match Soul, necklace to match Mind (not in ref but will be added later probably)

Extra/general stuff/small details:

-Their hair frizz bits are all matching their previously mentioned shape language (and lack there of in Whole’s case)

-eyes:

-the before (haha get it) they fully formed/gained consciousness designs keep to same general shape language idea, and gray specifically has a mouth as a nod to how Soul was the first one properly shown/we were shown their lips while the other two still were kept as the white and black heads for a bit before they inevitably got shown properly in TME

-the pre night/light designs I also don’t really feel the need to mention just bc they are pretty straight forward n snagged from TME/just their regular designs but missing the added layers n jackets n stuff ? Plus ig the added detail they are much more humanoid at the start I think is neat :3

uhhhh ig that’s it ?? Yeah sorry idk how to end this post just wanted an excuse to talk about my designs lol 

[sug4r-sp1c3]

May I request general dating hcs for Paul and patryck (Seperatly) from eddsworld? 💅

Paul makes me go on simp mode..

(btw, since patryck apperiances in the show where just REWARDS that the REAL patryck had for donating, i'll use the FANON patryck[the one that is used on Fanfics, comics, fan-stuff, etc.]

Paul and Patryck Dating HC!

Paul

OH MY GOD WHERE DO IT START

he's an idiot and a dummy, thats for sure

well now he's all that x73404938 JUST BECAUSE OF YOU

he will probably try to end his work at the army sooner just to see you

or if you are with him well, basically beg to the red leader to put you in missions or stuffy like that with him

he would try to hide the smell of cigarrette's

I SAID TRY

speaking about try

he would try to get you flowers or tiny stuff!

or even if he saw something shiny around the army he would pick it up and if its like a ring he would give it to you!

and if this isn't enough to you to be sure that that boy haves something with you..

after some monts!(or even a year i could say) he wil ask you out!

in his own way ofc

the current dates would be(in the case that you aren't in the army), a night dinner or just movie nights! or things like that

if you ARE in the army. The dates would be just walking around the place, going to some places to practice, or even just have a lunch together!

[just imaginated him and you on the army's like caffeteria. in a normal table but with a red blanket, like if you both where in a restaurant, hehe]

HE'S A SWEETHEART LIKE OMG

probably when he gets you flowers they would be kinda dead or even with some petals falling

and he isn't proud of it

he murmures a sorry as he insists that he will get you something better

(SOBBING OVER THE FACT THAT I COULDN'T FIND A GIF ASJHDJS SORRYYYYY)

Patryck

feeling like this bitch would deny all at the start

"i'm not doing it i'm not-"

he keeps saying until he realizes he has been doing tiny things for you..

for example: you both are in the army? he holds you doors and tells the leader to not worry about you and basically speaks good abt you

or when you pass he stares at you, not creepy, just with a tiny shine(and it isn't until Paul tells him that if he's paying attention or when you leaved)

he would start with tiny things

shinning things that he finds, flowers, coffee.

until he forces himself to ask you out

or well try

he would try to insunuate that he is in love with you like sometimes being there when you don't even need him, trying to go out in missions(if you are in the army ofc)

he's there if you are hurt

or when you are hurt he finds an excuse to go and visit you!(and brings some flowers, or even sends, but. lets keep that as a secret)

he tries to be serious or un-expressive around you

but probably fails miserably

You would have to make the first move if you both want to be something..bc it would take him like...4 dating months

[this isn't mine! it was made by fnafhs-aesthetics ! if you are a fan of FHS and want a banner or an icon go and check their profile!]

sorry if they are any spell mistakes english isn't my original lenguage!(its Spanish lolz)

[vtoriacore-rbs]

tw. ed + whatever the fuck is wrong w me in general. id actually advise against reading this but this helps get things off my chest.

me slipping back into old ed habits bc my intrusive thoughts actually ended up triggering me 💀💀💀 i went on a 2 day fast and only had mineral water and i feel both proud and horrified that ive allowed myself to do that so now im eating healthy things to kinda make up for it but anyways i weighed myself too even tho i said i wouldn't. like i know i shouldn't feel happy over the fact i starved and weakened my body on purpose but it feels nice to stick to something and actually have some discipline back in my life.

had a breakdown too earlier for no reason (altho im on my period so maybe that's why, fuck you uterus btw there is no us only u someone remove this thing PLEASE). like bro some bitch in college also was telling me how she was losing weight and she deadass told me that my ribcage sticking out was so aesthetic and it just enabled me, we only spoke 3 times before that and im pretty sure she has an ed too bc she kept trying to get my measurements??? she also said she'd sacrifice two of her ribs to get a waist like mine and i know she meant it as a compliment but i wanted to cry and felt low-key ashamed like i hate when people point out my physical appearance and i was stretching i didn't even mean for my shirt to go higher up it was so uncomfy. it's weird tho cause when i starve myself i feel happy abt it but when other people point it out and praise me for it i get really mad. maybe it's bc i discourage eds and im very pro-recovery but anyways that was a weird comment™ i think it played into the breakdown. she tried grabbing my wrist several times and i told her to stop trying to touch me but she wouldn't stop either and was like "just for a second please" like i felt so icky bc of that too like bitch hands off before i retaliate <3 so yeah now im trying to eat again but honestly i feel like im gonna throw up bc i didn't eat for 2 days lmao and the entire day today i felt so dizzy. like yesterday was fine but today ?? no. my muscles hurt so bad so im gonna have a 50g protein shake too ugh im so tired. gonna try get up to 1000 kcal at least and make the deficit up over the weekend bc my stomach physically hurts when i try to eat (but this strawberry yogurt bangs even tho im half full already).

ive been slipping back into an ed mindset over the last month tho even with my binges and i just wanna look ill enough for one of my doctors finally tell me im underweight enough they didn't even acknowledge i was severely underweight 3-4 years ago that felt so humiliating and now im thinking along the lines of "i need to be a better anorexic" even tho its fucked up and like im trying to just snap myself out of this mindset but it's not working so im gonna have to get a therapist potentially. bc i don't want my organs and bones failing but at the same time, i wanna make sure doctors take me seriously this time and maybe it'll be a fucking reminder to take eds seriously. it actually pisses me off hos insensitive some doctors are about eds and the fact they indirectly fucking allow it sometimes too like. just bc im not in a critical condition and only like 3/4kgs underweight doesn't mean i don't have an ed or that it isn't "severe enough" smh this annoys me so much.

if you read it up to here don't worry ill be fine, a bitch always pulls thru and these are just momentary lapses in judgement im not letting mental illness win im too fucking good for this (<- motivating myself kinda feel better after writing this NGL).

[ioannemos]

wow, fun asks. here: 2, 4, 10, 20, 29, 35, 42, 44, 47, 49, 58, 62, 64, 65

wow, lots of questions haha 😁

talk about a notable time a narrative or character has looked you dead in the eyes and said “fuck your plan, here’s what we’re actually doing.”

the only thing that comes to mind atm is actually the reverse of this. a character told me "i'm not doing that," i said "yes you are," and the character said "no i'm not and your story is DEAD now." it's been about a million years since i worked on it so i don't even remember what it was. the fandom was star wars, i remember that much...

what is the plot bunny you’ve been carrying for the longest? optional bonus question: do you ever wonder why you haven’t written it yet and experience deep existential dread?

i'm not sure, tbh. my foodless bubble city concept has finally been put to use in a fanfic, so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ maybe my reverse aladdin plot bunny? had that one for a while. no existential dread bc, like, it's neat, but i'm having fun with other stuff

at what point in the process do you come up with titles, and how easy or hard is that for you?

there must be a title or the story is not written down. period. even if the title is boring or lame or doesn't quite make sense, it Must have a title or it stays in my head

my standards are not high, tho. i'll name it a word in the story's epigraph, a suitable verb/adjective/noun, a phrase from the song that inspired it, etc.

what is your favorite trope to write?

is hurt/comfort a trope?

give us a spoiler for one of your stories.

rodney never recovers

[bc i will wonder later: silence like darkness]

tell us about a character who’s very different than you who you love a whole lot.

jason. thinks books are boring. watches anime. could probably bench press a pick-up truck. works out for fun. enjoys cheap beer and spicy food. could kill you several different ways without even bringing in weaponry other than his body and training but would rather challenge you to dumb stunts like 'who can balance on a chair's two back legs the longest' or. well basically anything in my 'boys will be boys' tag

he is. such a jock. short king. borderline himbo. i love him

describe the aesthetic of a story in 5 words.

exposed, wind, reaching, cowboys, post-apocalypse

[bc i will wonder later: manifest]

any writing advice you want to share?

write what you want, fam. don't worry about being unique or cliche or whether people will like it, or even whether you'll finish it. write for yourself first

what story are you most proud of?

hmm. madonna in orange

do you want to be published some day?

hoo boy. uh. maybe??? idk. it sounds like a lot of work and a lot of time and you have to finish the story... not a realistic dream

what is the last thing that a fic made you google when you were writing it?

don't remember but it was probably how to spell a word, does this word mean what i think it means, or looking up psychosis (again)

what’s the weirdest reason you’ve ever shipped something?

the weirdest one off the top of my head is also probably my weirdest ship, obi-wan/shmi. i started shipping them when i realized they were relatively close in age, had to raise anakin, and never met in canon. it started as, idk, kind of a joke? but now i'm kinda into it

what is your favourite title for a fic you’ve read?

went looking through my bookmarks and ah yes, Nothing Says "Feel Better Soon" Like Grand Theft Larceny (white collar fic)

what is your favourite title for a fic you’ve written?

i am weirdly attached to no such thing as an innocent bystander but i also like manifest, wandering stars, how to be forgiven, the house at the end of the world, laqueus, madonna in orange...

[doerot]

Thought crimes aren't real but there's this one girl that I was kinda friends with that told me I was the reason she felt confident enough to apply to art school and she wrote me this insanely sweet letter in my year book and I want to hype her up so much like I'm so proud of her accomplishments,,, but also in the end I couldn't afford to go to the art schools I got into and I failed my first semester at community college bc I was so depressed and if I have to see one more aesthetic post about how much of an amazing time she's having I might lose it just a little bit

[septemberhills]

kim donghan [ focus ]

[lovingseventeen]

is seventeen good at taking your picture? *ੈ✩‧₊˚

a/n: this is kinda random but wholesome lol 

seungcheol:

✿ “ah, you’re pretty”

✿ it just sort of comes out, really. he was taking a couple pictures but he puts your phone down for a second just to look at you

✿ he giggles when you start blushing (the pictures end up being the kind thats a little blurry bc you moved when he got you blushy, but its still aesthetically pleasing)

jeonghan: 

✿ he tries to prank you by showing you that he actually took a (very cute and giggly) selfie while you were posing (this selfie becomes your lock screen eventually)

✿ when he sees you scoff he does his specific “hahaha” laugh (y’all know what i mean) 

✿ but just as you’re about to smack his arm he swipes left and he actually took a couple good pictures 

joshua: 

✿ i feel like he’s the kind to be pretty diligent with taking your picture 

✿ will direct how you pose (if you want him to help) to get the best possible picture 

✿ “mm maybe turn your chin this way just a little bit” he goes, even so far as to demonstrate with his own face

jun: 

✿ he really tries his best and they’re not totally bad 

✿ occasionally just crops your foot out weirdly or it’s not lined up the best 

✿ it may take another one or two tries but you’ll get there 

✿ will comment when you post that 1) you look pretty and 2) he took the picture (he’s proud)

hoshi: 

✿ takes a million pictures of you in rapid fashion and each of them are about 2% different from each other 

✿ may be a little bit hit or miss 

✿ will encourage a horanghae hand at some point 

✿ but even though he’s taking pictures kinda fast he will be patient and take more if you want him to 

wonwoo: 

✿ i feel like he’d take pictures of you from two angles at most and ngl, they ain’t bad 

✿ like somehow, he didn’t put that much thought into them but they’re pretty good???

woozi: 

✿ he may not take too many pictures but he puts a lot of care into the 7 he does take

✿ says little words under his breath, maybe quirks his head as he’s figuring out how to hold your phone

✿ “hmm maybe this isn’t right” *head tilt* “is it?”

dk: 

✿ may be a little bit overdramatic with the lunging to “make you look taller” 

✿ but best boy energy and he’s enthusiastic to help you !!

✿ will probably get a cute candid picture of you laughing over his antics

mingyu: 

✿ he’s probably taller than you but he will squat and/or break his back to get that good angle 

✿ also has a pretty artistic eye so i could assume that he’d get an interesting picture 

✿ he also did mention bringing his camera with him everywhere (in that one interview) so he’d probably be the kind of boyfriend that would take your picture without you knowing 

✿ honestly use his height and some funky lens to your advantage to get something editorial 

minghao: 

✿ another artsy boy hehe 

✿ very flexible will most definitely get pictures of you from so many angles 

✿ moves around you enough so you barey have to adjust 

✿ i feel like he’d help you filter your pictures too 

seungkwan: 

✿ who am i kidding, seungkwan will go to every extreme to get the perfect picture 

✿ ofc he knows all of your best angles 

✿ you may want to stop taking pictures but he will inSiSt he can do better 

✿ you think the pictures are fine already (he really did do so good) but he’s pointing to tell you to go back to pose 

vernon:

✿ the energy may not be through the roof but he’s still putting an effort trust

✿ if he doesn’t get what you want at first all you gotta do is demonstrate what you want

✿ really, just make him stand in your place and take a quick example

✿ “so i want you to take it like this, so you see this in the background too”

✿ “ah okay i see” he nods

✿ funniest part is the practice photo and he’s just standing in it like 🧍

dino: 

✿ also tries pretty hard

✿ he’s about to show you what he has so far before he grabs your phone back before you even see he screen

✿ “wait let me try again!”

✿ he gets excited when he feels like the pictures turned out well

✿ sneakily sends a couple photos to his own phone 🫶🏽

[adrunkskeletonsduck]

Wʜᴀᴛ ⵊ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ ᴅᴀᴛᴇs ᴡɪᴛʜ Sᴛᴀʀ Wᴀʀs ᴄʜᴀʀᴀᴄᴛᴇʀs ᴀʀᴇ ʟɪᴋᴇ

Take this while I work on requests and cough my lungs out

warning - wolffes gets a little nsfw 👀

Sᴛᴀʀᴡᴀʀs Mᴀsᴛᴇʀʟɪsᴛ

Anakin Skywalker - To start of let’s get one thing out of the way rq, this man doesn’t know what the concept of time management is. He’s literally late to everything, doesn’t matter if he was the one who made the plans, set up the reservations he’s always late. Smh. He probably considers almost any type of alone time with you a date. Taking you out to a burger place? It’s a date now. Need to go clothes shopping? It’s a date. Def doesn’t like to take you to super fancy place for dates, not bc he doesn’t think you deserve it bc trust me he spoils you in different ways but bc he doesn’t like super formal settings like that. Dates with him are always a lot of fun tho, and they always ends in the two of you doing something you definitely should not be

Ahsoka Tano - Out door dates are her thing fs!! She knows all the spots to and she shares them all with you. Need to know were the best view of corascaunt is? Or were you can find the prettiest flowers? She’s your girl! Dates with her are soo romantic. She takes you on picnics, Star gazing, hiking etc. You always get the best photos of her bc she’s photogenic asf and just going out with her in general is so much fun.

Commander Cody - He likes more home dates, And yk what your cool with it bc it’s always amazing. He also would take you out to fancy dinners every now and then, and he takes date advice from Obi wan so dates with him are always very nice and romantic.

Captain Rex - Literally showing you off the entire time, and will continue bc he’s so proud to have a s/o who’s so amazing. He takes date advice from Anakin, and then when Ahsoka hears what Anakins telling him, she decides to help him out bc she doesn’t want him to get dumped. Weirdly specific, but I think he took you to a fair for your first date. In the end your dates end up being a lot of fun.

Commander Wolffe - Complete opposite of his brother cody, he has no idea what he’s doing. In fact it probably didn’t even occur to him that he was supposed to take you on dates until someone said something abt it. His idea of a date was taking you out to 79’s with the rest of his squad, and that ended with him knuckles deep inside of you at the back of the bar bc he got a little to jealous watching you talk with his vod. After that and a little talk you decided that you would be the one planing dates.

Obi wan Kenobi - Dates with him are sooo romantic, classy and aesthetic honestly. Lots of cafe dates, painting/art stuff and he loves trying new types of food with you as well. Museum dates are a given with him, but if you don’t like that kinda stuff it’s alr bc he has a whole bucket list of things he wants to do with you. He’s a hopeless romantic 100%, so all the dates he takes you on make you feel like your in a romance novel. My guy knows what he’s doing ;)

[cherryrollarts]

Von Kaiser Headcanon Post

Been wanting to share all my Kaiser headcanons and also just kinda wanted a place to put them so I could look at them when needed. However, here is somewhat of a masterpost for all my Kaiser headcanons, and the backstory I wrote for him.

I should explain that my canon for the Punch-Out!! lore is the timeline being in somewhat modern day but with the early 2000s/late 90s aesthetic.

Putting a TW bc there are some heavy topics, as well as I'll be putting everything under a cut because there's a lot, enjoy!

TW: mentions of abuse, war, alcohol, and violence

So, firstly, I'd like to put down that I do have a Punch-Out!! oc who is one of Kaiser's closest friends, however, I will most likely not talk abt him in this post, as this is just pertaining to Kaiser only.

Anyways, lets start with his backstory that I have written up!

-Kaiser was an only child born from a somewhat uneasy marriage. Kaiser was raised fairly strictly by both his father and mother and never really got along too well with others, he has always been a bit rowdy and overly confident which was most likely his way of dealing with the beatings and verbal harassment he received from, primarily, his father. He was taught this was to build character and make him stronger and become a good man in the future. However, this has pretty obviously done the opposite. Von Kaiser was fairly young when his father entered the war and soon after he was forced to do all the jobs his father had done at home. The war lasted about 5 years and by the end of it, his mother and him had received the news that Kaiser's father had died. His mother became incredibly strict and even more aggressive and careless than his father had been. He was trained to become a passionate soldier of a person. To value serving others, to respect authority and be willing to take punishment and pain for the good of the country, for the good of his family. Kaiser was about 17 when he had gotten a job and realized how little his social skills had improved. He had an incredibly hard time completing tasks and talking to others and oftentimes came off as rude, loud, brass and aggressive. No matter how hard he tried he never managed to make many friends. As he began his early 20s Germany had gotten into another war and he was expected to serve. He was proud to be of use to his country and was hungry to be on the battlefield. But as we all know, war isn't playful and is hardly ever fair. Kaiser was returned home, one of the lucky ones, but he was not the same man as before. He struggled more than ever to keep conversations, make connections and complete basic social tasks. His eyes had gone foggy, his body beyond tired and his mind more than clouded. Even so he powered on. He was incredibly grateful to be alive, he shouldn't have been acting so immature and childish, what is this worry that fogged his mind? It’s simply cowardice, it was pathetic for a man like him to be behaving in such a way. Disgusting even. All these horribly damaging ideas rang in his head, he had been told them from strangers, from acquaintances and especially from his mother. A man cannot cope like this, so he turned to alcohol to numb his thoughts. Although it had never grown into addiction, he still drank heavily during this time. 10 years of this pain, of this mental anguish poisoning not only his emotions toward himself but toward his mother. Even so, he could never stand up to that woman. She had the power to make him collapse and beg for forgiveness, cry for hours and endure the beatings she’d give him. This furthered his ptsd, he hadn’t ever been diagnosed until much later but it was clear he was suffering. As years went on, he managed to find work and was fairly well off. A former soldier had pointed him toward the military academy and suggested he work as a boxing instructor for the children at the base. He agreed, eager to help children become as disciplined and well taught as him! He was an encouraging teacher, though fairly strict. He found joy in his work for once, and was happy to do this for years. Soon after, his own skills were noticed by many and he was frequently told to try out for the WVBA. Kaiser was excited and cocky, ready to show off his skills and ride to the top. However, despite his training he only managed to secure a spot as #2 in the Minor Circuit. This initially bothered him, but he soon realized it gave him the ability to continue teaching the boxing course at the academy. He moved to Berlin shortly before joining the WVBA and has grown distant from his mother. -

There it is! I have more headcanons going into this, but I wanna explain a few points in his backstory.

-Kaiser's real name is Hans Braun.

-His mother and father had married fairly early in their lives, early 20s, and had Kaiser a year after that. Although Kaiser is in his 40s, his mother is only in her 60s.

-Kaiser was diagnosed with PTSD far into his life, I'd say when he was in his mid/late 30s. He has learned many healthy coping mechanisms, but sometimes he struggles, of course.

-Really doesn't mind being in the rank he is now. he's happy for doing all he can and is excited that this gives him more time to teach his students. He loves finding purpose in teaching these children about self defense than his professional career.

-Due to his personality and such, it was a bit hard for him to make friends in the WVBA, though Soda and Disco Kid/the rest of the Minor Circuit have always been very kind to him, moreso Soda.

Now onto other headcanons that don't have a place in his backstory.

-Kaiser is autistic. He was diagnosed after his PTSD diagnosis and he struggled at first with learning and coming to terms with it, but now he's relatively okay with it. Still learning.

-Some art illustrating his stimming traits and such, most are based off in-game animations from his Wii appearence. His special interests are wwii russian and german tanks, as well as, combat boots. (reminder to not infantalize him by calling his stimming 'cute' hes a grown man after all)

-Kaiser is Aro/Ace. Uses he/him pronouns. He has never really shown any interest in romantic or sexual relationships with anyone, and prefers to keep it that way. He likes training a fair bit more.

-Genuinely cares for all of his boxing students and will happily pay out of pocket for any supplies or tools needed for classes. He understands students could be dealign with anything and is understanding to all's trials. Is very accomodating.

-He can cook. Barely. Same goes for singing. His cooking ability was stoked by his students, so now he makes them fresh soups in the winter and refreshing salads in the summer. Though he can sing fairly okay in some instances, he doesn't ever really enjoy it.

-Reads a quite a lot, loves literature especially historical nonfiction. Enjoys information based texts rather than personal accounts.

-Isn't good at using the internet, but has a good grasp on using his dinky little phone, isn't too active on social media or anything.

This should be it for now, I will add anything that I find interesting to add or talk about, feel free to ask questions abt all this too!! Thank you for reading I know I wrote a lot, I'm hoping to do something like this for other boxers I love!!

[allisonlol]

hey aliceee babyyy!

first things first, let me congrats you on achieving your 2k followers! as a fan and a friend, I'm genuinely proud of your accomplishment! my girl, all of your posts are top-tier content and you deserve each one of your followers!! 💞🖤

now, let me introduce myself for your match-up:

starting with my appearance, I have mid-long wavy hair that is naturally red, greenish-brown eyes, freckles, birthmarks, and (unfortunately) some s/h scars throughout my body. my height is something around 5'1 and 5'2 (1m58/1m60) and my body is an average hourglass. my style is dark academia, and I appreciate adding a lot of its aspects to my daily life.

my mbti type is intj, my enneagram is 5w4 (like yours) and I'm that typical introverted girl who loves staying inside surrounded by her books and blankets. I'm a calm and patient person (not that much) and my friends usually describe me as someone intelligent and considerate. and well, regardless of being soft and affectionate, I hate clinginess. like, I definitely can deal with clingy friends or s/o's, but I tend to go to the ones who understand my desire for personal space and whose love language isn't physical touch, but quality time.

however, I don't have that many friends, and, since I'm a quiet and cold person (mainly with strangers), people end up thinking of me as someone arrogant and go away. I'm also annoyingly ironic, especially during arguments. (and I'm kinda manipulative too, but we don't take about it 🤫).

talking about my hobbies, they are playing the piano/accordion, drawing, painting, reading and playing games like cards and chess. I love sunny days, classical music, tea, vintage stuff, and studying things like history, philosophy, and society itself. but I also hate crowded places, loud noises, and cold weather.

that's all, I guess.

desired fandom: BSD

NSFW? of course-

꧁♥ ᴍᴀᴛᴄʜᴍᴀᴋɪɴɢ ɪɴ ᴘʀᴏɢʀᴇss… ♥꧂

i match you with . . . fyodor dostoevsky!

ok ok, i'm not just doing that bc u are a super mega simp for him!! it genuinely MAKES SENSE. i also had poe in mind, but the whole thing about hating clinginess and being a tad bit manipulative (me too girl) made me change it. anyway, shall we begin?

Relationship:

first of all, can i just say what an aesthetic couple you two are??

while fyodor tends to move around a lot for work purposes, you both illegally own an old-victorian style house on the outskirts of yokohama where you frequently stay

since both of you prefer to stay home rather than go out often, it's there that most of your time is spent together

^doing things like playing the piano / cello together, chess & card games (where you test your near equal intelligence against the other), and listening to classical music

outings are not nonexistent, tho! on sunny days, you'll convince fyodor to join you on walks through yokohama where you'll visit antique shops or bookstores

often scholarly conversations about history, sociology, and the psychology of humans <3

you and fyodor share an office, where you often work in a comfortable silence. the two of you share the kind of relationship where simply being in the other's presence is calming, and not many words are needed

fyodor tends to neglect his personal needs in favor of working, so you make sure to bring him tea and small trays of food every now and then

arguments are VERY rare, since you both are very logical and straightforward with your words (to each other, at least). it's unlikely you would ever misunderstand due to your similarities and deep understanding

although not being the most inclined to physical affections, fyodor frequently likes to give you head pats, kisses on the cheek, and snuggle together in bed while reading (especially on cold days)

and yes, you were able to convince him to read to you a few times. his voice and accent are so lovely and v calming to fall asleep to <3

NSFW

sex is not the most often occurrence due to your busy schedules, but when it does happen, DAMN does it leave you satisfied until the next time

with you, fyodor is a very intense person in bed

he adores your figure and every part of your body. insists that you look more ethereal than the most infamous portraits of goddesses in the past <3

the significant height and size difference between the two of you is definitely something that comes into play. sensing a sliiiight size kink in the way he likes to hold you down and make you feel powerless

degrading, but praises you at the same time. things like "you're such a pretty whore for me" and "what an obedient slut you are"

sex tires him out easily due to his "weaker constitution" so one good round is probably all you'll get at one time

favors positions like mating press so he can both hold you down and get to watch all the pretty expressions on ur face. makes fun of you for it too >:((

ALWAYS doms, but it you want him in the palm of your hand just give him head and tease him <33 will darkly glare down at you whilst also shaking and struggling to maintain his composure

oh also. breathy whimpers when he's close...that's all i have to say <3