#projectbabyback

[projectbabyback]

As I was scrolling through Facebook today, I stumbled across a blog post written by a good friend of mine, talking about her views on, and why she wasn’t a feminist. At first, I was admittedly a bit surprised but soon found myself reading the post and nodding along in agreement with some of the things she had said.  Perhaps I didn’t agree with everything, but she made valid points, and I was proud of her for standing up for her beliefs, and it made me take a moment to think about my own.  I myself, don’t know that I would consider myself a feminist by today’s standards. It’s not that I have anything against them, in fact, I am very supportive of many aspects of the movement, I just don’t count myself among them.  It is my belief that women, along with men, should have the right to choose who, and what the want to be and do in life. If a woman would like to become the CEO of a company? I want to empower and encourage her to do so! If a woman would like to step back and work within her home or focus on creating a family, then I support that as well!  I for one am a supporter of the hearth and home. If it were possible for me at this time, I absolutely would be a stay at home wife and dote on my husband as wives used to do.  However, for us at this moment it is not feasible. Both William and I are at a point in our lives where we must both work in order to get to where we want to be in life. One day, however, we both know that I very much do feel the call to honor both my husband and our future children from the home. I very much would love to be there for my future children in all aspects and have also been looking into the possibility of homeschooling when the time comes.  There is nothing wrong with that path. In fact, I feel that the homemakers, the stay at home wives and mothers, and the fathers who dedicate time to their homes and families are the cornerstone of society that as of late has been losing its value and importance in many families.  Today, I feel that so much emphasis is placed on being a career man or woman. You must go to school, and college, and excel in order to be viewed as having any modicum of success in society.  In school, home economics classes teaching the young generations how to be prepared for life outside of the home with doting, or especially absent, parents are becoming a thing of the past.  Of course, I believe in equal rights. I am forever grateful for the women in history that fought to bring us to where we are today. However, I also have respect that they did so whilst maintaining their grace and class.  They do not scream from the rooftops. They did not demonize men, or advocate for the loss of values.  In today’s society, I simply feel that perhaps feminism should be more so about building women up in a way that supports them in anything they want to do. Not shunning or demeaning those that still hold to traditional roles and values. Because to me, that is just silly.  Acting like men are the root of all evil simply does not seem to be working in any capacity. It gives us a bad name, and perhaps instead of fighting with swords and shields, we ought to aim to educate and nurture those who we are so sure are against us. Men are not the problem, and belittling or invalidating them, I feel, is not the solution. Teach those who are ignorant, and lift up those among them who understand and support us already.  My version of feminism is not just about us. It's about everyone being able to be who and what they want to be without fear of oppression or invalidation as long as you are not hurting others or yourself of course. 

We are all sisters (and brothers) no matter our paths, so let us act like it, shall we?  (( I would just like to clarify that I do not have any problems with anyone that claims to be a feminist or those who support them. I am simply offering my point of view and opinions on the matter, and wish only for peace among everyone. Again, not calling anyone out or saying anyone is wrong. )) 

[projectbabyback]

It’s easy to get caught up in the stress of your day to day life, whether you’re tracking your body so closely, and trying to time everything just right to try and catch your miracle, or you’re busy raising them as we speak, or even just having a stressful school or work week.

With the flu running rampant around the household for the past week, it’s been hard to balance everything I needed to get done, and as work quickly approaches tomorrow, I can’t help but notice how few of my goals I was able to accomplish.

However, despite the lack of checks, x’s, or crosses, I am reminding myself that that’s ok.

Sure, maybe I didn’t complete everything I wanted to do. But tonight I succeeded in making a really delicious dinner for my husband, I immediately put away the leftovers and washed up all the dishes, and I put some more work into my fertility journal. Not to mention the time spent taking care of hubby, and my father, who have been sick all the while trying to recover myself. At the end of the day, those are some pretty good accomplishments in my book.

As a reward, I decided I would take some quiet time in the bath to reflect while Will played his games before bed.

I often get caught up in my own headspace thinking of things that need done, how to do them, what’s next... all these things that distract me from focusing on one of the most important elements of this whole journey, myself.

It takes two to tango after all, and if that’s the case, shouldn’t I be doing my best to maintain myself, in all aspects?

I mean, I’m already tracking what feels like every change my body tries to make. Shouldn’t I then too be taking better care of the vessel I’m watching so closely?

Sure, We all go through the day to day motions of cleaning ourselves up, brushing our hair, our teeth, clean clothes all of that. But I mean setting aside designated time to really intentionally check in. To set out and say “you deserve this, you are working so hard.” To not only prepare the temple of my future little one, but deliberately do so in a way that makes me more connected on a spiritual level as well. I see nothing wrong with it.

One way or the other, I think it’s important to be connected by more than just prescriptions, cardio and charts.

Ramblings aside.

Please remember to take care of yourselves mamas, and those to be. We owe it to ourselves and our little ones here or in the future to be the best versions of ourselves we can be.

[projectbabyback]

Hello February!

Well, it seems that February is already upon us, and although I’m a couple days late in posting about it, I thought I would take some time to talk about some of the changes already this month.  So, last month as a new year’s present I got a surprise visit from AF, and Will and I believe that for the first time in months we were able to estimate an ovulation date based on CM and other symptoms. As someone who has been diagnosed with PCOS, and has a history of extremely irregular periods and anovulatory bleeding, this was HUGE for us!  Unfortunately, but not unexpectedly, the one test we did try came up as another BFN, but we have become plenty used to them by now. However, what we did not expect was to be met with AF once again just a day later on the 31st! To say I was excited was an understatement. For the first time in 2 years, I actually had what one could consider being a full ‘normal’ cycle!  As I’m writing now, we are on CD 4, and AF is still going strong. Although a minor annoyance with the flu that’s been going around, I’m quite pleased. For Cycle 2, we are making it a priority to closely track what’s going on, so as to start getting a feel for what exactly is happening throughout the cycle, and hopefully be able to gauge expectations going forward (as well as to have a log for future doctor appointments should it be necessary.)  We have ordered ovulation strips, and are keeping a digital and physical log for the tests, hoping to catch the fertile window for sure this time. As well, we will be doing our best to take  BBT readings, and continue my meds/vitamin regimen as well.  I can't say for sure what has worked/helped to get us to Cycle 2 of 2020 already, compared to our normally 3-4 month cycles, but we are going to keep doing what we were, and just more closely monitor otherwise in hopes to getting some more answers.  Anywho! I think that’s about enough rambling for one day.  Thanks for reading, and baby dust to all! <3

[projectbabyback]

Welcome, Backs!

Hello, and welcome to our corner of the internet!  I figured that it would probably be a good idea to post a bit of an introduction of myself and the blog, so here it goes.  My name is Harley, and on November 23, 2019, I married the love of my life, William. Since then, I’ve been working on becoming the best wife, and homemaker, that I can be.  However, what a lot of folks don’t know, is that William and I have been TTC for about a year and a half now after we had discovered that we were expecting (surprise!), but ended up having a very early miscarriage.  Although it was early in our relationship, we knew that we were ready to take on that challenge together, and decided that we wanted to do everything we could to have our own little baby Back.  Thus, the creation of this blog!  Anyone who is going through, or has gone through the process of TTC knows that it can be stressful, especially when things don't go to plan. Thus, we decided that it wouldn't be a bad idea to share our journey with others who may be having similar experiences, as well as to give ourselves a safe space to talk about what is going on without fear of judgment.  So, for better or for worse, we’re here, and we’re excited to have you with us!