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lemonine · 6 years ago

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i did the 100 (more or less) questions thing for nenela! i uh. actually started it after 4.1 and finished it just before maintenance ended today so there might be a few inaccuracies here and there... spoilers up until 4.2!

Name: Nenela Nela

Age: 16 at the start of ARR

Nationality: Ul’dahn

Height: 86,9 cm

Race: Dunesfolk Lalafell

Eye Color: Blue

Hair Color: Purple, though some parts are on the lighter side

Hobbies: Weaving, knitting and sewing, collecting dolls, mammets and minions

PERSONALITY PROFILE

People don’t behave the same way all the time. In fact, they generally have a mask for every social group – friends, family, business. Sometimes they have a different mask for different groups of friends. How does your character act around different people? To people she doesn’t know, Nenela acts polite but friendly. She’s unlikely to start talking to a stranger without being prompted to, though.

Be kind to her, however, and she’ll eagerly help out with anything you ask, and maybe even things you didn’t. She tries to maintain an optimistic disposition and likes giving others presents, especially homemade gifts.

Nenela is very fond of the Scions and feels like they’re family. She won’t, however, show them how anxious their expectations for a Warrior of Light can make her. She only shows that to her closest friends or fellow Echo-bearers. She’s not afraid to cry in public, but won’t really tell what’s bothering her, usually making up some excuse.

It’s kind of awkward - what subjects are likely to make your character hesitate, flush, stumble on their words, etc.? First the obvious answer: ‘Do you have a crush on someone?’ aka the Great Big Teenager Embarrassment. Second is someone using too many big words and her not understanding but not having the courage to ask them to explain it in simpler words. Third is asking people to get things from high shelves. She’s been practicing with trying to use the Rescue spell on objects so she doesn’t have to ask for help but so far it has resulted in a lot of broken objects. Finally, being treated as a The One and Only Chosen Hero makes her Real Uncomfortable.

Is your character more dominant or submissive to the people around them? Do they tend to follow others’ orders and wait for people to give them instruction in life, or do they charge ahead and make decisions on their own? Oh, she’s very much a follower. Partially because that’s what she’s always done, partially because she likes to help and have people be proud of her.

When she’s traveling on her own, however, she follows her own path. Basically, you give her a task and she will complete it in any way she can. She often forgets to ask for help though, because she’s so used to being on her own. Example: Say you’re hanging out with Nenela. You ask her, ‘Hey, let’s go to the Carline Canopy and get one of Mother Miounne’s eel pies!’ She grabs her chocobo and rushes off. You head to the Carline Canopy. Nenela got there before you. “Why did you rush off?” you ask. “Didn’t you tell me to go to the Carline Canopy? Well, I did. What’s wrong?” As you can see, she doesn’t mean it bad but it might accidentally seem rude.

What happens when your character doesn’t get what they want?

She’ll sulk for a bit but mostly shrug and forget about it. ‘Maybe next time.’

What’s the character’s self-esteem like?

Right now, as of right now (patch 4.2), she’s pretty ok with herself. She tries hard, she helps out others, she’s got friends. She can heal but now also protect others as a Dark Knight. She knows she can’t do everything herself but she’s working on that. She’s still easily scared and some past events hurt to think about but things are looking up. She might even be a tiny little bit proud of herself for making it this far.

Does it change over the course of the story?

Hoo boy does it ever. She never intended to become the kind of adventurer that vanquishes foes, she just wanted to learn magic and help others. But, y’know, Hydaelyn had other plans. She started out frightened by practically everything and it was only thanks to the people she met along the way that she became more courageous. Their expectations did weigh heavily on her, though. The Bloody Banquet was uh. traumatic, to say the least. In Ishgard, Nenela picks up the sword, because maybe if she had been able to fight properly she wouldn’t have had to run away while her friends were fighting (as far as she knew at that time, to their deaths). However, [drk quests until level 50 happen here]. She gets so frightened of herself and any violence, really. Doesn’t help that Ishgard has that whole religious atmosphere of irredeemable sin. She starts to believe that if she picks up a sword again, surely she will be stained for life and whatever holy magic she has from the elementals or the gods will be taken away. If she doesn’t have her magic, then she’d be even more helpless, so she tries to live up to the image of a saintly White Mage. She did find a nice family feeling again with the Fortemps family, though. Slowly but surely she gains more confidence as things start looking up again. Only at the end of Stormblood does she break down again because the whole ‘fighting a war’ thing is kind of really bad? Ever since Ilberd fell off that wall she’d felt so bad because 1. hello again bad flashbacks to 2.55 my old friend and 2. this man just killed himself in front of me and i’m upset but also angry i couldn’t kill him myself which sounds very much like bad dark knight thoughts oh no oh no oh no That feeling chased her pretty much all through 4.x and with Zenos egging her own it only got worse, maybe she was a cruel murderer like Ilberd or Zenos and surely you’ll land in the Seventh Hell??? She spends a while super depressed and afraid to continue any WoL related activities. 4.1 has her reluctantly going along with Arenvald and Alphinaud and she gets dragged into another adventure, and while it’s fun she’s constantly doubting herself. Only when Fordola sees into her mind with the Echo and asks how she does it, she realizes she doesn’t know, but that’s something that can change. She travels back to Ishgard, the place where she felt at home for a long time, and asks Sidurgu to teach her. She doesn’t like picking up a sword again but last time she did she learned something about herself, even if it was unpleasant. [60-70 drk quests happen here. she never does 50-60 so sid puts her through an intense training montage] So she learns about herself again, and becomes good friends with Rielle who also shows her dark arts and conjury can definitely go together. She returns to Rhalgr’s Reach, proudly bearing a sword upon her back, surprising her friends. Sword and cane can go together, and she’s gonna try the best she can do. And if someone (cough) Asahi (cough) tries calling her a beast again… Well, maybe they’ll think twice when they find themselves facing the pointy end of her sword.

What’s one flaw about themselves that they hate the most and wish they could change? Definitely the fear and anxiety. Yes, she works hard to push through the fear most of the time but it also stops her from showing her true self to others.

How does their personality shift when someone gets to know them well? She laughs more (she’s kinda embarrassed of her laugh usually) and generally becomes a lot more chatty. Still not likely to speak about her own fears or insecurities, though, a friend has to put in a lot of effort for her to talk about that.

Do they prefer time alone, or with other people? Both, as long as they are balanced. Too much time with people is exhausting, too little becomes very lonely.

Is it easy for this character to tell someone “no” when they don’t want to do something? She really struggles with saying no. Sometimes it’s not that bad, because it can help her conquer her fears. Other times, though, she works herself to exhaustion simply because she made too many promises.

If this character were to describe their own personality, how would they do it? Probably something like ‘determined and kind’.

Is this character aware of their flaws? Some, but not all. She tends to lie to herself about these things a lot, especially the self-destructive tendencies.

How has this character’s personality changed from childhood to adulthood? As a child Nenela was much more quiet and wasn’t likely do anything on her own, always waiting on others. Nowadays she runs off on her own when she feels like it.

Who influenced this character’s personality? Did they pick up any mannerisms or traits from someone? When she was working to repay her parents’ debts, she never made many friends. Most people would be working somewhere one day, and be gone the next. When the Calamity struck, however, and the debt was gone simply because her current owner was gone… Well, that’s when she started living on the streets, the two Lalafell she escaped with her only companions. Though they eventually lost each other, Nenela would never forget Sasapaka’s unwavering faith and Dedesha’s brave spirit.

Does this character express affection? Are they comfortable doing so? She doesn’t really express it that often, mostly because she has trouble figuring out if it would or would not be unwanted. When other people hug her or pat her head, though, she does really like it.

When frightened, will the character “fight” or “flight”? Often flight, but also fight or freeze. Depends on the situation and level of scariness.

Does this character ever put someone else’s needs in front of their own? Very often. I mean, it comes with being a WoL, so there’s not always a choice. Even before becoming an adventurer she tended to put others first unless it was a life or death situation.

If this character suffered amnesia and lost all their memories, what would they be like? A lot less scared, most likely. As you grow up, you learn of more and more things to be afraid of, after all. She probably wouldn’t mind that much. What you don’t know can’t hurt you, right? Maybe she’d grow up to help out at a small church like St. Adama Landama’s.

How does the character’s living space reflect their personality? She has quite some gil to spare from her adventuring quests, which she spends on small things to indulge in. She’s rented rooms across the realm and every time they ended up full of pillows, plush dolls, bits and pieces of fabrics… The only thing she keeps tidy is her mammet collection, they sit on a shelf. The mammets don’t mind because they’re inanimate unless you wind them up.

What’s one thing that other characters wish they could change about this character’s personality? She should really stop being such a doormat.

EMOTIONAL PROFILE

How easy is it for your character to feel anger? What’s usually a good tip off that they’re experiencing it? (Physical reactions, movements of appendages, etc.) Nenela gets very angry at any sign of injustice, like, say, Monetarists… traitors… traitorous Monetarists… She becomes very tense and digs her nails into the palm of her hands to stay calm. Icy stare also included. Blind rage is very uncommon but it has happened before. In that case, expect to be stabbed with the pointy end of her cane. Without a cane, kicking someone in the shins is the next best attack.

a. Sadness? Sadness tends to completely overwhelm her and it’s not that hard to make her cry. She’s not a loud crier, though, usually it’s more silent tears and a wobbly lip. She needs quite a while to cool down after she’s cried. It takes a while before she can form coherent sentences again too.

b. Happiness?

When Nenela is happy, she can get pretty loud and excitable. She also tends forget about personal space for a bit. She might be a bit embarrassed about it afterwards.

c. Fear? She’s afraid quite often, but she’s gotten better at hiding it. As a child she would freeze if someone only raised their voice, but nowadays it mostly displays itself as shaking. Fear is also often accompanied by the same symptoms as sadness. Nenela’s also had panic attacks before, the heart-pounding, loud crying, difficulty breathing kind.

What state of mind is the character usually in? Most often? Tired, probably. Otherwise it’d be kinda neutral? Or just ‘alright’.

How easily does this character trust their feelings with others? Not easily. She pretends to, but it’s mostly superficial and not how she might necessarily really feel.

a. Has anyone ever betrayed them? (motions at Ilberd) Him. That Fucker. What a Tool. I mean, that's the Big Betrayal but there’s countless other little incidents where people didn’t end up what they seemed...

b. How did it affect their ability to trust? ….And yet she still trusts every damn person she meets. She tries to be more careful but 99% she just. doesn’t see it coming. How did this child survive on the streets without ‘How Not To Trust Suspicious Strangers 101’? Help from other street kids? Kind strangers? The blessing of the Twelve? Probably all three.

Strangely enough, she did pick up the bad vibes of Asahi, but because everyone around her kept saying he was a good guy, she started doubting herself again.

Can this character easily hide their emotions? Up to a certain extent. There’s lots of bottling up involved but those bottles tend to, well. explode after too long.

How well can this character resist their emotions and impulses? Impulses are usually blocked by fear, so that’s pretty easy to resist. The big exploding emotions though? There’s pretty much no stopping that once that well runs over.

Does this character ever get violent (with others, objects, themselves) when feeling any certain emotions? ‘Hello my name is Dark Knight Nenela and every time I push my bad emotions away I get a little better at stabbing people with a sword.” :) She’s working on it, though.

Has this character contemplated suicide? Only contemplating, but yes. Even at her lowest point, though, she wouldn’t dare to try because it’s too scary.

Does the character have any triggers? Why do these things trigger them? Too much fire and smoke gives her some pretty bad Calamity flashbacks. Binding attacks like Hölmgang and (cough) the various mechanics that target only healers (cough) also make her very panicky.

What would hurt this character so badly they couldn’t even breathe? Other than the obvious ‘being kicked across the room’ answer, the death of dear friends is pretty dang painful. Same if anyone were to be enthralled by a primal. Being abandoned by the gods would also be an option.

What is guaranteed to make this character smile? Sunshine. Making friends smile. Pretzels. Her doll collection. A hug. Being appreciated.

If the character could remove one emotion from their life, which would they choose? Fear, though she would also consider anger. In the end, anger is still more useful than fear, so that one goes.

If they’re feeling upset, who are they likely to talk to for comfort? Or do they keep it inside? Praying to the gods is one way Nenela tries to feel better. Sometimes sitting in silence with a friend helps too.

How would this character cope with losing someone extremely close to them? A lot of crying. A lot of lying in bed feeling depressed. It takes a lot of time before she’s more or less functional again.

How does this character look and feel when crying? Red puffy eyes. Shaking. Lip trembling. At worst she may curl up and hide her face.

If the character had to live out the rest of their life either perpetually angry, sad, or frightened, which would they choose? Honestly? That’d be hell. In that case, the option would be no life at all.

Does this character tend to blame or punish others for their own emotions? She blames herself a lot.

Is this character empathetic, and tends to be influenced by the emotions of others? Very much, yes. She wants to help people not feel bad, if other people are sad or hurt everything is Bad and it Must Be Fixed because that is her Job.

If the character were to come face to face with their darkest fears in a nightmare, what would be the scene? On one side of the room, Ilberd Feare! On the other, Zenos Yae Galvus! It’s somewhere high! There’s fire! There’s a healer chaining attack! There’s dragons! There’s the thousands of Garlean soldiers that have been slain by warriors of light! Nymeia personally throws Nenela into Shinryu’s gaping jaw? Welcome to Hell! Welcome to Hell!

PHYSICAL PROFILE

Based on the current diet and exercise your character has, where do you see them physically in five years? Still short, obviously. A bit more buff, since she’s no longer afraid of swords. You don’t see muscles on a Lalafell very well, though.

How agile is this character? Can they dodge easily? Or are they clumsy? That’s definitely one thing Nenela has going for her, she’s fast….. for a Lalafell, that is. Anything or anyone with taller legs will easily catch up with her. She’s better at hiding herself than actually dodging.

Describe the muscle content of your character. Are they untrained and soft? Or lithe and powerful? She’s very soft but she does have plenty of stamina to keep running around when an enemy mistakes you for prey.

What kind of body fat percentage do you suppose they have? I don’t know percentages bc math is hard but she’s chubby. Maybe not very noticable for a Lalafell but it shows a bit more because she’s so short.

Do they have any scars? Where did those scars come from, and how did they get them? Mostly minor bumps and scrapes, because she’s not often in the line of fire. She’s got a really nasty burn on her left arm because she tripped trying to dodge one of Zenos’ attacks back in Yanxia, though. She often covers it up because while it doesn’t hurt anymore, it still looks really bad.

Describe some hairstyles your character has had in the past. Some kind of pigtail or ponytail for most of her life. After 2.55, she cut it short, convinced that she could never return to Ul’dah again. To ease the pain, Tataru taught her a traditional Dunesfolk hairdo, so she’d at least have something to remind her of home. It became her default hairstyle, though she’s also started wearing odango since she discovered her Hingan heritage.

How easily can they bear pain? Depends.. She’s pretty squishy but then again, she doesn’t get hit that often. Being a healer also helps, because when you do get hit, you can easily soften the pain. Hitting your toe on a table might actually hurt more than getting hit in battle.

How long can this character sit still? Hours, as long as she can do something with her hands. Otherwise she’s more likely to just doze off.

Do they shift a lot when sleeping? Nope, there’s barely any movement at all. She’s very much a sleep-hugger, though. She always ends up clutching a pillow/blankets/whatever’s available.

What is the most imperfect part of this character’s body? She’s kinda insecure about her height in general, because she is short even compared to the average Lalafell.

Do they get cold easily? How about overheated? Yes for both.. Nenela’s very temperature sensitive. She always makes sure she is dressed appropriately for the weather. Cold is worse than warmth, however.

What about seasickness? Fortunately not! She thinks its not that different from the motion during a carriage ride.

How do they react to getting an illness? Think about sore throats, achy bodies, headaches, stuffy noses, runny noses… She can power through a cold pretty easily, but anything worse than that can only be numbed by magic and a lot of sleep.

Is this character’s body sensitive to touch? She’s a bit jumpy, so I guess she’s pretty sensitive, yes. Don’t poke her in the sides, she won’t like it. Same with tickling.

How strong are this character’s basic senses? Sight, hearing, touch, taste, smell. There’s a lot of scents she likes, like freshly baked bread, the sun on the desert sands, incense, those kinds of things. Less pleasant smells tend to overwhelm her, however, like at busy markets or the smell of chocobo droppings. She is also rather finicky when it comes to the material of her clothes.

PREFERENCES AND PEEVES

What’s the state of your character’s kitchen? What kind of foods do you find in it? Is it… clean? Because she’s on the road a lot, it’s not often she takes the time to cook. The things Nenela does make are usually rather simple, cooking simply isn’t her strongest suit.

If they could only eat one type of food for the rest of their life, what would they choose? Bread. Buttered or dry, it’s always good.

What kind of clothing does this character like wearing and why? Light, floaty dresses. Long robes. Using a chestpiece as a dress with a skort underneath. Even her armor as a Dark Knight is more fabric than armor. Not too many ruffles or tight sleeves. Boots or sandals, but nothing with heels.

What’s something that turns this character on? Does this character have any kinks? She’s a big weenie who doesn’t really think about this stuff yet.

How does this character feel about animals? Big ones are scary and could possibly eat her, but little animals like pups or kittens can be cute.

a. Would they want any pets? She can’t care for them while on the road, but if she settles down someday she’d like some kind of bird.

b. What animals are their favorite? Sheep! They’re so cute and cuddly.

If this character could master a skill instantly, which would they choose? She’d love to have a bigger vocabulary, because she does like stories but she’s just not too good at reading.

Are there any behaviors that other characters do that irk this character? People that talk too much about money or profits. There’s more important things in life, y’know!

Does the character ever voice their annoyance? Not really, she just gets a bit grumpy.

What kind of comedy does this character prefer? Toilet humor, vulgar, slapstick, morbid, etc. A lot of times humor goes over her head, but she does have a fondness for puns.

If the character could only wear clothing of one color, which would they choose? Nenela’s pretty fond of raptor blue, but if she’d have to choose, she’d choose white, because it’s nice in any kind of weather.

Describe the character’s favorite possession. Where did they get it, and why are they so attached? She has a little cloth doll she always carries with her. Or, well, doll… It’s really just a piece of fabric wrapped around another piece of fabric with eyes sewed on. It’s one of the first things she ever owned and she can’t sleep without it.

What is the character’s favorite weather? A sunny, cloudless sky, with a little breeze.

Are there any hobbies this character absolutely hates and would never want to do? Nenela’s not that into sports. Chocobo racing, too, seems very exhausting and dangerous, and frankly, a waste of energy.

What’s the easiest way to annoy this character? She gets real grumpy when she or her fears aren’t taken seriously.

Are their interests and likes socially appropriate? I think so? She just needs a lot of time for herself.

ALL ABOUT HISTORY

Describe a scenario that has impacted your character and caused them extreme happiness. Her first time casting magic. It felt so natural and made her feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

a. Fear? Running around in the streets of Ul’dah, after most of the building she stayed in had collapsed. Desperately trying to hold onto her friends’ hands, trying not to lose them in the middle of the smoke and all the rioters.

b. Disappointment? When Papalymo sacrificed himself to contain Shinryu, and she couldn’t do anything to help, she was incredibly disappointed in herself.

c. Depression? After the liberation of Ala Mhigo, Nenela simply… collapsed. All the stress and fighting had become too much and she spent about a week in bed in Rhalgr’s Reach’s infirmary, haunted by a mixture of her own imagination and memories.

What is the character’s first memory? She can vaguely remember being in her mother’s arms, being sung to in a language she didn’t understand. That’s all she really remembers of her parents.

Sensations are powerful things, and often certain scents, sounds, touches, etc. can invoke memories strongly associated with them. Which have imprinted in your character’s mind? Stepping off the boat in Kugane for the first time is something Nenela will likely never forget. The smell of the sea, along with the lanterns in the city that were being lit one by one in the sun’s setting light…

How’d they get along with their parents and/or other relatives? Nenela never knew her family, and only recently found out she had an aunt living in Kugane. Aunt Kikiko is very kind and is overjoyed to finally see the daughter of her long lost sister, but Nenela’s still a bit… She’s not really sure what to make of it. She’s a bit worried she’ll accidentally offend her aunt, since she doesn’t know much of Hingan culture.

If your character had to choose one friend they’ve valued over all others, who would it be? ...Alphinaud. Nenela started out thinking of him as the definition of smugness come to life, but somehow along the way they became best buddies because both of them try a little too hard to make the world better, even if they don’t always know how.

What’s the worst injury they’ve ever gotten? The burns on her left arm she’s got from Zenos’ attack in Yanxia. Other bad wounds she has had have healed over time, yet they always seem to have come from Imperials. Guess they have a strict ‘attack the healer first’ strategy.

How many places has this character lived in? What stands out most about those places to them? She was born at the Golden Bazaar in Eastern Thanalan. From about 6 years old she worked and lived in an underground textiles shop in Ul’dah. Post-Calamity she spent most of her time on the streets, or helping out at the Thaumaturges Guild for a few gil. As an adventurer she only lives in places for a few months at a time, usually renting small rooms.

If the character could erase one memory from their mind, what would it be? Both Ilberd and Zenos’ faces as they died bc that shit’s terrifying. Same with the sultana ‘dying’, because even though it ended up not being true it was still extremely unpleasant to watch.

What is the character’s economic situation? She lives a relatively sober existence for an adventurer, only indulging in a few things for herself. This does, however, mean she’s quite a bit of gil for emergency situations.

What are the character’s three clearest memories? Getting off the carriage to Gridania and immediately being handed a bag of raisins by a strange Mi’qote, returning from the Moonfire Faire only see the walls of the Waking Sands covered in blood, sitting at the hearth in Fortemps manor, listening to Count Edward write his journal, Emmanellain gossip about girls to Honoroit. Alphinaud in a corner reading some dusty old tome, Tataru trying to eavesdrop on Emmanellain… The feeling of being surrounded by family.

Describe the character’s love life throughout the years. Non-existant. She’s had crushes before but is always afraid to act on them.

How did the family that raised this character influence them? She doesn’t really remember her family, most of her childhood memories being of, well. Child labor, instead. Because of this she has a tendency to always listen to people in charge and never ever wrong them.

Does this character feel guilty about anything in the past? A lot of things, but mostly having to slay people in self-defense when they weren’t necessarily evil, simply doing their jobs or acting in self-defense as well.

if youve gotten this far, thank you so much for reading! nenela’s my first oc in years and i love her... way too much. leave a like if youve read it, maybe? <3

#lemon plays ffxiv

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