#processyouremotions

[suncountrygirl-graphghan-designs]

What a rollercoaster the past 9 weeks have been. I'm exceptionally proud of my son becoming an #usafairman . We were blessed with friends and family coming up from FL to see him off for basic and then return to pet sit while we went to San Antonio. Ritchie's granny, girlfriend, Dad and I all got to see him graduate. Everyone has scattered to the four winds now, with mom leaving just a few hours ago, and hubby and I are truly empty nesters. Time for me to get back on track with crocheting with our big craft holidays coming on fast. Tomorrow though. Tonight I'm just a little sad and disconnected. . . . . . . . . #emptynest #bmtgraduation #usaftechschool #wingmom #warthogs321trs #backontracktomorrow #processyouremotions #afwingmom #usaf #craftfairprep #getittogether #chickamaugamade https://www.instagram.com/p/ChJRJhWORGM/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[jonathanmilliondollarsmile]

#SaturdayMotivation #PositiveVibesOnly #ProcessYourEmotions💜 https://www.instagram.com/p/CYv3hM4r4XjwkPL8rs3MgDsWjfeqfIt-tcBqwY0/?utm_medium=tumblr

[chocolateuplift]

Hello! Today was the first Reflection and Reconciliation Funeral, to grieve non-death loss, outdoors in this beautiful natural space. A Reflection and Reconciliation Funeral is about mourning what we've lost, naming and accepting not supressing our emotions, remembering the past, and moving toward uplift. Message me if you'd like one. #reflectionandreconciliation #feelyourfeelings #processyouremotions #onwardandupward (at Lincoln Park Nature Boardwalk)

[asking-jude]

Everytime I get my period the week and a half leading up to it, I get really really emotional. Im really sensitive especially during it and I cry a lot and feel a lot of emotions and part of me tells myself to ignore those emotions because it's just me on my period. The past few days , when I've been intimate with my partner immediately after we're done I start crying . I start sobbing and bawling and I don't know if I should dismiss it or not. Ive trauma from Dad when I was 4. Help? -🌌

Hey!

PMS/periods can get intense and it’s not always easy to deal with all the strong emotions that come with it. But period or not, your emotions are not something you should ignore. Just because it’s that time of the month, doesn’t make your feelings any less valid. Not working through your feelings in a healthy way will only make it harder to deal with each new strong emotion when it appears. That can be extremely overwhelming and therefore make you even more sensitive, irritable and cranky with time. That’s why there’s a risk you might feel even more overwhelmed every next month. 

In order to prevent that from happening, the best you can do is focus on what you feel and try to figure out why. By allowing yourself to feel your feelings and fully processing them, you will be able to accept them and move on. It’s okay to get overwhelmed sometimes. But if it’s causing you great distress, your need to run away from it is completely understandable. Except that emotions are not something you can bury under a rug and expect it not to affect you anymore whatsoever. To be able to truly work through them, you must face them first. That might be scary, but ultimately, it will help you find peace and relief.  

I’m really sorry to hear about your trauma. The chances are that you still carry some unresolved feelings about it and that they further affect your mood in present day. And sex is usually quite an emotionally charged situation, so it’s not uncommon for it to evoke a strong emotional response. The time around your period might always be a bit extra challenging, but there are things you can practice to cope with it better. Check out the resources below for more info:

http://www.artofwellbeing.com/2016/06/21/processyouremotions/ 

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/theory-knowledge/201701/understanding-emotions-and-how-process-them

https://www.eatingdisorderhope.com/blog/learning-tolerate-emotions 

https://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/conditions/helpful-vs-harmful-ways-manage-emotions 

https://www.bustle.com/p/how-to-deal-when-your-period-makes-you-emotional-30017 

https://childhoodtraumarecovery.com/complex-ptsd-articles/disturbing-memories-why-they-can-remain-unprocessed/ 

https://www.healthline.com/health/healthy-sex/crying-after-sex 

P. S. check out Asking Jude’s youtube channel to find some helpful videos https://www.youtube.com/c/AskingJude                     

All the best,

Nevena Radojević

Asking Jude needs YOUR help! Donate pocket change here and save our safe space. 

[asking-jude]

Hey, a few years ago my younger brother did something kinda sexual (not assault or anything, he just put parts of himself on me) and it keeps popping up in my mind at random times, and when it does I start scratching at where he did it. My head feels weird and I sometimes start shaking to try and get rid of the feeling. Do you know why this is happening?

Hey there!

I’m sorry you went through this uncomfortable experience. Assault or not, any type of unwanted sexual touch is deeply unpleasant and it’s not at all surprising you feel uneasy thinking about it. It’s natural to be upset about something like this. 

What you’re currently experiencing sounds like intrusive thoughts. They can cause a great amount of distress and are usually triggered when you’re dealing with a lot of anxious feelings. As for the itch you feel, it also seems to be psychological. It’s an uncomfortable, unpleasant, frustrating sensation and it feels like you can’t shake it off, no matter how hard you try. It feels like it’s outside of your control. Think about the symbolism of that sensation – it is very similar to how people feel when someone touches them inappropriately without their consent. When you remember this negative experience with your brother, your brain  subconsciously tries to distance you from all the unsettling feelings relating to that situation. It does so by turning the discomfort caused by that memory into the itchy sensations you feel on your body in the present. Your brain tries to protect you from feeling upset by shifting the focus on your physical body, even though what really bothers you is psychological in nature.

In order to overcome these unsettling feelings, you need to work through them. I understand thinking about it is not easy for you, but it’s absolutely necessary to process all that you feel, no matter how unpleasant. Otherwise, it’s always gonna stay somewhere, in the back of your head, and keep haunting you. Below you will find more tips on how to deal with this:

•        http://www.artofwellbeing.com/2016/06/21/processyouremotions/ •        https://www.eatingdisorderhope.com/blog/learning-tolerate-emotions •        https://www.northpointrecovery.com/blog/7-tips-deal-stop-intrusive-thoughts/ •        https://sharecenter.yale.edu/information-about-sexual-misconduct/how-people-cope •        https://leanin.org/meeting-guides/self-care-after-sexual-harassment 

I’m not sure how much younger your brother is than you and if he knew what he was doing at the time or not, but either way it’s extremely important to explain to him what is appropriate and what isn’t. You deserve to feel safe and comfortable in your home and I sincerely hope nothing similar will happen again.

P. S. check out Asking Jude’s youtube channel to find some helpful videos https://www.youtube.com/c/AskingJude as well as our new ASMR channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCW-frOIU0fLnTSxOxKnBT8Q                           

Take care,        

Nevena Radojević

Asking Jude needs YOUR help! Donate pocket change here and save our safe space.