#pringles for lunch though

[unbisoudelibby]

i bring a sort of… coffee stench to the classroom that my professors hate

[steviewashere]

We need to make Steve Harrington less like cardboard. I am going to ramble, please bear with me. Listen if you want.

He had weird jock habits before. Wakes up at the ass-crack of dawn, goes on a three mile jog, lifts weights in his bedroom. Eats his "normal" breakfast which is like crazy: like four eggs, six pieces of bacon, some raspberries, maybe carrots, a full glass of milk, black coffee, four pieces of toast. He's gotta keep his energy up, y'know. Goes to school with a huge fucking backpack, a gallon sized jug of water, he carries around all of his textbooks because it's like a mini workout for him. Sometimes in lulls of classes or between periods, you'll find him talking to his group of friends, but he's actively stretching/doing yoga—his friends don't even acknowledge it because it just always happens. He eats the exact same lunch everyday: rice, chicken, broccoli, a banana, and a milk from the school. (Dude would love milk. Trust.) He'll do like two more workouts in his day: once in gym, and then whatever sport practice he has (basketball in the winter, swim in the spring, maybe a bit of football/soccer and baseball right before summer hits).

His music taste isn't crazy eclectic, but it's still tasteful. He loves Queen, loves Bruce Springsteen, loves TOTO. He's into the radio hits rock (which is classic now), but his favorite song (so I've heard in relation to the show) is "Hammer To Fall" by Queen—a song that wasn't widely popular on the radio. Yeah, he also likes Elvis; can make a reference when he needs to. But he does enjoy music. And, sure, yeah—he does like pop music; maybe that does include Madonna. And—listen to me—my stepdad, a guy who loves punk and metal and shit like that, he loves Madonna and Wham and George Michael on his own; because that's what was on the radio, he even owned some of these artists albums; it's not that strange for somebody like Steve to also like these artists. Though, they may not be his immediate go-to.

He takes good care of himself; appearance wise. His hairspray is Farrah Fawcett, but it's a product he picked up most likely from his mother. He styles it on his own, right after he works out in the morning. He probably knows how to iron his clothes; considering he wears things like chinos and polos, those things need to look nice and crisp for the babes (and non-babes alike). I wouldn't be surprised if he has a signature scent—like maybe...Calvin Klein's Obsession? Considering his family's tax bracket (that house is insane), he'd probably use high-end salon level hair products. He's using name brand detergents on his clothes.

And, yeah, I'm not sure if he's still living with his parents post season 3, but I think it's safe to maybe assume so—I feel like his parents are more caring about their only son than we give them credit for; his mom seems like a caring mother, as evident with the call she shares with Karen Wheeler, it seems like she'd usually be somebody to know Steve's whereabouts, that sort of thing. His dad is probably the most strict of his parents and has high expectations that Steve fails to meet. Because the high expectations are high. And maybe Steve didn't care too much about school, maybe enough to pass and still make all the teams he wants, but not enough to get him a scholarship. And, honestly, he was probably not a top-tier athlete at Hawkins High; maybe great, but not pristine. Hence why he had to actually try to make it into college, his entry wasn't guaranteed. And when he got rejection letters, probably including rejections for scholarships, his parents most likely denied to pay for him to go through schooling. And if he really wanted to go, he'd have to take out loans or something.

He probably gets Sports Illustrated and Rolling Stone magazines in his mailbox. He smokes Marlboros, the high-end cigarette. He keeps his pantry stocked with name brand snacks; Pringles, for example. Probably tries to cater to those around him, as that's what he saw his parents do for guests. He's not a terribly selfish person at all, despite having douchebag attached to his name. He probably was very flippant about the way he cared about things, he laughed at bad jokes, and snarked his way through Hawkins High. He very rarely threatened violence—my guess, considering he's a shit fist fighter.

The way his parents' marriage is going probably affects his view on love, too. He wants something better than what his parents offer to each other. He wants a true love, fairytale sort of thing. Steve probably thinks that he'll sense some amount of clarity with whoever he gets along with. He's probably a big dreamer. Probably lonely. Wants six kids, a wide and sprawling family because then, at least, he'll have people to always take care of (to prove he is not his parents), and people who (hopefully) will always care about him. He wants a lot with whoever he falls in love with (Nancy or somebody else). But not a lot in material terms; he wants a lot of love, he wants warmth, he wants constant and sweet attention. He wants love. Not whatever bullshit his parents had; and he tries really hard to not be that bullshit, but knows he still fails anyway. He doesn't want quick things, despite constantly dating or hooking up, he wants something to last—though, nothing lasts. That's why he probably leans a lot on Robin, she has a sort of platonic love to him that he shares for her; that platonic love is probably the first time he felt like he had something to cling onto because it wasn't going to just leave or find fault. He didn't lose with Robin because they just got each other in a way he doesn't know how to replicate with anybody else.

With work, he's not sure what he wants. He wants something that keeps his interest, but nothing really has. He seems really in tune with sports, history, and literature—as there have been several attempts of his to make connections to these topics showcased on screen. (Although, admittedly, those references kind of fall short.) He doesn't enjoy work like Family Video, but he finds it easy enough that it becomes a mechanical, mundane task that he can complete without thought. I think, also, due to his interest in sports, he most likely has a vague interest in statistics or math—I think he's accidentally really good with math, but refuses to acknowledge that because he hated math in school. But he has a knack for it, no matter how hard he denies. He's probably also wicked good at working on cars. His Beemer has been through a lot and I think he doesn't trust anybody else to work on his car, so he learns to do it himself, and with the guidance of his dad.

Despite complaining about being the party's babysitter, he quite likes it. Likes being the nurturing older brother that he never had. I feel like he'd maybe get a little bit insecure about it from time to time, though. Maybe he'd feel like he's not doing enough for them to consider him that way. Maybe he'd feel like he's doing too much and forcing his way into their lives. I think, if Max's letter ever comes up again, he'd let those insecurities fall away—I truly feel like she considers him an older brother figure, a real one, a good one. I think he'd cry over it, honestly.

I think he does cry quite a bit. Just not around other people. So it seems like he's sort of constipated in his emotions. But, realistically, he doesn't allow himself that chance to crack until he's in the safety of his bedroom. Because, honestly, I feel like despite the "ugliness" to his oddball room, he finds a sort of sanctuary in it. That's where his things are. That's where his smell is. That's his safe space.

And on the topic of his room, I think he definitely helped pick out 90% of the stuff he has. His wallpaper and curtains match because he looked inside the catalog his mom presented to him one day, and he likes things to match—so that's what he picked. (His mom bit back a sigh and tried to keep her expression neutral. She thinks it was an awful pick, but whatever her baby wants.) His dad sometimes takes him on day trips, and once when he was a kid (maybe middle school age, maybe even as a freshman), they went into some interior decorating store or something and he saw the car picture and knew he had to have it, so his dad bought it. (It jumpstarted one of a few interests they share: Cars.) The bedding was his choice. The mattress and bed frame were not. Everything else in his room was his pick. The bowling pin came from a birthday party when he was a kid, he won it at the prize counter in the little arcade area of their local bowling alley.

He's friends with whoever will spare him the attention he craves. Whoever will laugh at his jokes. Whoever will agree with the stupid shit he wants to do. Whoever will chant as he shotguns another beer.

He drinks and smokes because of Tommy. Steve and his dad had a big argument or something before his dad left for some business conference. So Tommy says they should get into his dad's alcohol and find somebody to sell them cigarettes as a way to rebel. Steve thinks he's being soooo cool (he's being lame). Next thing he knows, he's got a cigarette craving and knows how to shotgun a beer a little too well.

The pocket knife he uses on the beer cans is a gift he got from his dad, probably. One that he received as a birthday present for his 15th or something. His dad probably said something stupid like, "Every man needs a good knife. Never know when you'll need one." It's got Steve's initials carved into it and everything. In hindsight, it's pretty cool and it's custom to him—it's one of the only significant and caring gifts his dad ever gave him.

He doesn't cook like amazingly, but well enough that he could survive living on his own in an apartment. He likes spaghetti bolognese. And macaroni and cheese. He knows how to make a fire meatloaf. Could probably perfect rice and chicken in a heartbeat. But he does sort of rotate the same meals over and over because he procrastinates learning new things sometimes.

He's not stupid, he just takes a little longer to process all the information he's given. And on top of that, he needs the opportunity to ask questions so he can fully understand. He only feels stupid when he's denied the chance. And denied the opportunity to explain or connect. (Connecting like you would when taking margin notes in an article—Cornell style if you know what I mean. Like maybe some of the text reminds you of something in your real life, so you understand the text better by making that connection. That's how Steve connects to things.) So, yeah, I think he's probably a little bruised whenever somebody—yes, even his close buddy Dustin—walks all over him and treats him like a child when it comes to things unknown to him; especially shit that's D&D or Upside Down related, he doesn't know what's happening, but he'd like to know.

Lastly, and then I'll stop talking in your face, I think he would have the most off-putting, morbid sense of humor after surviving the Upside Down. Like sometimes he makes too strong eye contact and makes some crazy fucked up joke at you and then you just shut down. Like it's hard for him to get laughter sometimes because he'll just say odd shit. And then eventually, when people are done being stunned around him, they're like nervous giggling. All the while thinking, "Jesus fucking Christ, Steve. What the hell." He still feels accomplished even when the laugh is barely a sound, he laughs the hardest at his own morbid jokes. Robin, Nancy, Eddie, and even Jonathan think he needs some serious therapy; clock's ticking, might be time to get on that.

But uhhh, yeah. Steve needs to be more than a stiff board of cardboard, we need to do him justice because the duffers sure as hell won't.

[vodika-vibes]

Vodika, my love, I answered my own question and decided to come back for more.

Can I get "Squeezing their hand reassuringly and holding their hand throughout an intense social situation" with Fives?

Except, instead of a social situation, can it be a scary doctor appointment? I recently had to go to the doctor to get a mysterious lump checked out, and I was terrified. I wanted someone to be there with me so badly, but alas, I am a single pringle.

Please and thank you 💚 (maybe one more)

@the-bad-batch-baroness

Stressful Appointments

Summary: When you have to attend a scary doctor's appointment, Fives promises to be there, no matter what.

Pairing: ARC Trooper Fives x Reader

Word Count: 606

Warning: Medical stuff...but there's no details

Tagging: @trixie2023

A/N: I can't even imagine. My mom was diagnosed with breast cancer in the middle of covid when I was living in Europe, she had to tell me over facebook messenger, and I broke down and cried for like 15 minutes after I got off the phone with her. So this one's a little short, because it hits a little too close to home, sorry.

Divider by Saradika

“You need to relax, cyare.” Fives says quietly, as he tugs you against his side, and pulls your head to his shoulder, “You’re spiraling, lovely.”

“I know, I know.” You nervously twist you comm between your fingers, over and over again, “Fives, what if-”

“Hey, hey. No.” He lightly taps your chin with one finger, and you turn to look up at him, “We’re not doing any what-ifs, cyare.”

“But-”

“No buts,” He smiles soothingly and lightly tugs on a strand of your hair., “There is no point in wondering what-ifs when we haven’t even spoken to your doctor yet.”

You worry your lower lip, and Fives sighs and rubs his thumb across your lip, to stop you, “I know you’re worried, love.” He says softly, “But you’re just going to make yourself sick if you don’t relax, just a little.”

His hand moves to cup your cheek, and you close your eyes and lean into his touch. And for a moment, you’re able to forget that you’re sitting in the waiting room at the doctor’s office. 

“There we go,” Fives’ voice is low and soothing, “I’m here, cyare. And I’m not going anywhere.”

“Even if it’s bad news?” You ask, your voice slightly shaky. 

“Especially then.” He continues lightly smoothing his thumb across your cheek, “Will you look at me, cyare?”

You open your eyes and look up at him. His smile is warm and soft and so very loving, that for a moment you want to cry. 

“I love you,” Fives whispers, as though his words are for you and you alone.

You sniffle, “I love you too.” You rub your eyes roughly, trying to force the moisture away, “I’m just scared.”

“I know, cyare. But I’m not going anywhere. I’ll be right there next to you, regardless of what the doctor says.” Fives promises.

A shaky smile crosses your face, “I don’t deserve you,” You whisper, as you reach up and cup his face.

“Tough, because I chose you, and I’m going to keep choosing you.” Fives leans in and chastely kisses your nose, “Besides, you were right there with me when I got my chip removed, how could I offer you anything less than what you gave me?”

“That was different-” You say quietly.

“Not to me.” He kisses your cheek and then your temple, “And when we get out of here, I’ll buy you an ice cream.”

You lean heavily against him, “Can we get lunch instead? We can make a day out of it.”

“Mm. That sounds fun.” Fives agrees as he brushes some of your hair out of your face, “We can hit up that cafe you like so much.”

“The one with the fancy bread?”

“That’s the one,” He replies with a small smile.

You tilt your head, “And then we can get ice cream?” You ask hopefully.

He laughs, “Yes, you spoiled thing, then we can get ice cream.” He leans in and kisses you gently, and you sigh into the kiss. Though, when your name is called by the nurse, you tense again. 

Fives takes your hand, and squeezes your fingers, “Come on, cyare. Let’s get this over with, hm?”

You look up at him, and nod slowly. “Yeah. Okay.” Yet let him pull you to your feet, and you smile up at him as he kisses your joined fingers. “You’re staying, right?” You ask, just to make sure.

“Oh, cyare. Count Dooku himself couldn’t make me leave.” Fives promises with a sharp grin. And all of the tension drains from your body once more. If Fives says so, than it’s true, as simple as that.

[kkpwnall]

a bit more of diyc for wip wednesday, per favore? 🥺🤲

hiiiii noah, thanks so much for the ask and the encouragement!! and since it's been a minute since last week's wip wednesday, here's an extra long excerpt just for you. immediately following this snippet:

He digs his own lunch out from under the counter. Swaps half of his ham and swiss for half of Eddie’s pb&j. Slides a can of pringles across the counter between them. Knocks his elbow against Eddie’s and rests there, leaning against the counter and into each other.  “Did you get any sleep last night?” Eddie shrugs, “More than none. Less than some.” Steve snorts. Ain't that the truth. "Yeah, same here. Got any other insomnia tricks we should try?" “I mean, the last time I slept well was...” Eddie trails off suggestively, raising his eyebrows and cutting his eyes to the van outside the window with his lips pursed in a smile. Steve follows Eddie's look, a small smile tugging at his lips too as he nods. Even though he woke up with a crick in his neck, reeking of sex and sweat and rainwater, it's the best he's slept in years. Definitely since spring break.  "That and uh..." he draws his thumb over his palm, working out some imaginary soreness while he holds Eddie's gaze.  Come to think of it, the only times he's slept really well, the only sleep that's felt like rest, has been the times he's slept with Eddie.  “My uncle’s working tonight…” Eddie starts slowly through a mouthful of ham and swiss, finishes with a shrug. “You could come over, if you want to.”  On the one hand, the largest hand, the one that’s easiest and most tempting to reach out and grab, he’s literally dying to get back in bed with Eddie. In every sense of the word. To spend more time with him, to spoil him, to take his time with him… On the other hand— “It’s a school night, Eddie,” Steve flounders. Wants to laugh at himself for such a weak fucking excuse. Wants to bang his head against the fucking counter.

[intimidating-fettuccine]

AAAGGH!!!!!!!!! ♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️ Satyr s/o is good food!!! I smacked the table upon getting the notification during lunch so hard my Pringles fell over

I’m glad you liked it!!!!!!! Take care of your pringles though :)

[itsalwaysthesamehere]

Hey guys! This is from my ana doc that I keep private for the most part but I figured sharing would be great considering a lot of these tips/collections I got from tumblr anyways haha. I take no credit for any of this besides the food logs which are from my first week of relapsing. Ive tried to take things slower because I do have people Im hiding this relapse from so pleaseeeeeeeee no judgement. Im also super broke so I basically have to eat whatever we have at home. Enjoy yall!

Week one: No meat products. Prep soy sauce eggs, spicy foods and have breakfast, nothing off limits but only eat half of whatever you get for the week. Tons of salad and avoid heavy foods. 

Monday: 1800, high protein. 

Tuesday: 1600 Wednesday: 1400 Thursday: 1200 Friday: 1000

Saturday: 1200 Sunday: 1000

Monday: 1200

Tuesday: 1200

Wednesday: 1000

Thursday: 1000

Friday: 800 Saturday: 800 Sunday: 800 

Food log:

12/03/2023-

2 slimjims- 80 cal

One street taco- 75 cal

Cheese- 50 cal

Ravioli and salad: 350 calories

Total for breakfast- 205 calories

Total for dinner- 350 calories

Snack at night: 3 bananas, chocolates, chips :<, 1020 calories

Food log #2:

Breakfast: cottage cheese and raspberry jelly on toast, calories 147

Dinner: Spaghetti with garlic bread, calories 600

Snack: Garlic bread guts, 600 calories (heavily estimated, heavily exaggerated 

Total: 1,350 calories 

Food log #3:

Breakfast: White bread, cottage cheese and sugarfree raspberry jam, calories 200

Dinner: Cowboy stew with cornbread, calories 800

Snacks: Pastry :<, poptarts 1,150 calories

Total: 2540 calories

Lunch: Cowboy stew, 800

Snacks: One bite of pastry puff, cottage cheese with ritz crackers,pringles,  calories 437 

Total: 1,237 calories

Food log #5: 

Snack: Cottage cheese with sugarfree raspberry preserves and blueberries,, one chocolate, yahoo milk, sucker 335 cals 

Dinner: Alfredo with penne pasta, calories 600

Food log #6: 

Breakfast: 1/5th of a grape fruit, 1 egg white, 3 strips of bell pepper, 3 strawberries, and half a pom drink. Cals: 139

Snack: Icecream bite, 50 cals

Safe foods: 

Airhead - 60

Popcorn - 64 (per cup airpopped)

Animal crackers - 85 (ten crackers)

Baby ruth - 98

Milky way - 99

Vitamin water sugar-free - 0

Sparkling ice sugar-free - 5

Bai - 5 (any flavor)

Caprisun - 30-80 (depends on the flavor)

V8 - 45

Chinese fortune cookie - 15

Laffy taffy - 33

Pop rocks - 36

Cotton candy - 40 (10g)

Lollipop - 47

Candy cane - 59

White bread - 67

Angel food cake - 72

Victorian sponge cake - 72

Opera cake - 80

Buttermilk Pancake - 83

Pancake - 86

Pepperoni - 10

Chicken breast fillet - 17

Prosciutto- 18

Sushi - 39

Literally any lunch meat, they're all low cal!

Strip steak - 40 (3 slices!!!)

Quail breast - 69

Turkey wings - 53

Chicken wings - 77

Beef tripe - 80

Beef jerky - 82

Mushrooms - 1

Baby carrots - 5

Celery - 6

Bell pepper - 15

Tomatos - 20

Zucchini -  33

Green beans - 34 (per cup!!! Just throw on some red pepper and lemon juice and feast, sisters)

Artichoke - 60

Cucumber  - 66

Cherries - 4

Apricots - 17

Passion fruit - 17

Plums - 30

Cantaloupe - 23 (per 70g)

Mandarin oranges - 47

Peaches - 60

DON'T BINGE: 

Take a moment and talk to God about it (even if you’re not a believer, it doesn’t hurt to try!)

Watch mukbang about the food that you are craving

Watch supersize vs superskinny (its on YouTube)

Look in the mirror and remind yourself why you are doing this in the first place

Read a book

Do your homework

Do chores

Smell at the food that you are craving

Write down your feelings and cravings (trust me it helps sm)

Drink A LOT of water. Drink until you feel like you’re about to explode

Clean your room! Get rid of all those water bottles and dishes.

Clean out your closet, decide what clothes you don’t wear and donate them to your local thrift store!

Go on a shopping spree! (Don’t spend all your money though!)

Organize your Pinterest boards

Compare yourself to th!nsp0

Weigh yourself

Listen to music

Drink calming tea

Catch up with a friend!

Talk to your pet about your feelings

Sleep the cravings out

Take a long walk

Take a cold shower

Watch a movie you haven’t seen before

Take care of your nails!

Look up how to do something you have always wanted to learn (make-up, macramé, origami, sign language, …)

This might sound weird but I love sudokus and they always get me focused enough to stop thinking about bingeing

Make a to-do list for the rest of the week

Listen to a podcast

Have a self-care day (take an everything-shower, put on a face mask, take care of your hair and body)

Make an essay about any topic you like

Start writing a book

Re-decorate your room

Make a New Year’s resolution list! Who do you want to be at the end of 2024?

^ or make a vision board !!!

Call a friend or family member

Read the newspaper (lowkey more interesting than I expected it to be)

If you’re frustrated about it, scream into a pillow

Scroll on insta or tiktok

Built a Lego set

Pick some flowers!

Practice deep breathing

Try yoga if you haven’t before!

If you are still standing in your kitchen, girl get out rn

Ask yourself if you are physically hungry, the answer is most likely no

Keep a food diary

Munch on a low cal snack instead, take veerryyyy slow bites

Thing I do but definitely don’t recommend:

Binge and purge (if you purge make sure you brush your teeth abt 30mins after)

Sm0ke or v@pe (depends if i’m able to go outside or not)

Sh (please, pleaaaase don’t do this)

I’m so guilty to do this to my family and the people who think I’m in a true recovery. But if I don’t Im scared of what might happen, I’m scared I’ll kill myself or even worse. I just really want to lose weight and feel like myself again

On day one I did mess up by having meat early on but we have to go through meat products before I can buy vegetarian substitutes plus we don’t have eggs rn. 

so you think you're "stuck" here again? you're not actually stuck, you're just not trying hard enough. you can lower your intake, walk more, exercise harder, fast for longer. the only thing stopping you from losing weight is you. why haven't you changed that? do something.

It’s only been two hours and you are already eating again. You are gonna be huge forever.

if you're looking at some food and doubting yourself if you should eat it or not, the answer is no 

I doubt that eating makes you as happy as stepping on the scale and seeing that you lost weight

You aren’t hungry, you’re just bored.

Excuses to not eat:

My tummy hurts from gallbladder

I took my pills in the morning and got sick

Sky kept me busy all day

Shared breakfast and lunch with sky

Thought I ate, forgot. *Go to get a snack and come back with a drink or small treat*

Spend time cooking for others

Talk about how you ate different things for breakfast

Smaller chest

Sharper jawline

Less curvy thighs

Square hips

Dainty hands

Collarbones

Slutty waist

Sharp shoulders

To float in my clothes

To look hot in emo clothes

Deeper set eyes

Visible spine

✨️Hipbones✨️

To save money (less food eaten, less food to buy)

Mesh tops

Muscles easier to see

People telling me I'm so small

Boyfriends being able to pick me up like it's nothing

some tips on food fixation and binging urges:

hellooo, ive been thinking about compiling some things that have helped me get my mind off of food and overall just writing down some rant -- so here it is!

keep in mind, im not an expert and this is mostly just me babbling. im writing this as a motivation for myself, and it will probably not work for everyone, but if you find any of this stuff helpful -- my pleasure!

★ mindfulness ★

`` first of all -- ive found that that strong-urge-to-binge thing is more of a state, not a feeling. it helps me to treat it as such: a mental state, a spiral, and to come out of that spiral you can:

◌ stop!

◌ breath in, breath out. ground yourself. have that thought of "wait, what am i doing?" in the space between you and the fridge

◌ check in with your body. what position are you in? does something hurt? are you cold? are you tired? overenergized?

◌ check in with your mind. is there any buzz? are you overwhelmed?

◌ if you located the issue (eg. im tired! i want comfort! so food = comfort!) -- great! move on from there to resolving this issue in a more mindful, not-involving-food way (then i should nap, do yoga, just lie on the floor, watch comfort movie)

why are we doing that? in my opinon, its very important to train that "what am i doing" moment of conciousness, because through that you can see better why you want to binge. is it a mental thing? how can you cope without food? is it a physical feeling? an effect of restriction? how can you tweak your eating to make it better (imo, fasting does better job at managing binges than plain restriction)

you cant just showe thinspo at your face everytime you crave something, after all : )

★ activities ★

`` make something with your hands! ohh my god! i cant stress it enough, it can help you to not get fixated on thinking about food so much! it can be something easy like drawing, or you can look up something new for yourself

`` go on a walk. i know, it can be very tiring to even think about, but t does wonders at distracting you

`` yoga. very simple and very effective. or, alternatively

`` do nothing at all for a bit. just. lie down, turn off your phone, no sound, no nothing (helps if your binging urge feels overwhelming)

`` if you havent already, try drinking coffee. it really is called an appetite supressant for a reason

`` i wasnt the one who told you that, but you can look up some gross stuff involving food.. f*eeding k*ink usually freaks me out on multiple levels for long enough to forget about food

`` test yourself and allow yourself to feel bored. put down your phone. watch a really long flm. boredom is a part of our lives, and if you teach yourself to feel it in such small portions without binging youll be so so proud of yourself

Thinspos i have^

[frischkasekuchen]

Yandere! Professor! Vanya x Reader

Credits:

thriftlita - Vanya

Content Warnings:

Teacher/Student Relationship

Drugging

Kidnapping

References to animal death/animals get harmed

Blood and General Violence

Slight body horror

Stalking

Swearing

(Author's note: Romance is not my forte, so please forgive me if a good chunk of the plot is unsatisfactory (Vanya is a tad bit OOC in this fic). Reader-chan is 18+, but Teacher/Student relationships are illegal. If you have any concerns or questions about the content, please feel free to send me an ask. With that said... (bangs pots and pans) HEY SHRINE MAIDENS! @pearlsongfromstuff, @shu-dzhoker- COME GET Y'ALL FOOD! Happy Valentine's Day to all!)

First Week of Uni. Sept. 20XX

You wandered around the school, hauling around a KFC family meal. Of course, you wouldn’t have ordered such a large meal of your own volition, but you were already out the door after you noticed your bag was heavier than usual. Now, you were just looking for a quiet place to eat, since you hadn’t made any friends to hang out with (It was a hard-knock life being a social science major, wasn’t it?). 

Scoping out the lecture halls, you could hear students murmuring and professors, of course, lecturing. Walking down the hall, you pressed your ear to the last door labeled “ENGINEERING”. …No sound. You give the door a small knock.

A voice comes from the door. “Come in.”

You pull the door ajar and poke your head through, surveying the room. 

You step through the door and shut it behind you. The lecture hall is…clean to your pleasant surprise. You honestly thought that the room would stink of oil and be cluttered with scrap metal. Before you stood before the professor, who appeared to be critiquing students’ blueprints. A brunette with a shock of white streaking through his hair. Reading glasses slipping down his large, crooked nose. Focused, cornflower eyes, a black turtleneck that hugs his muscles just right-

No (Y/N)! You are not thirsting for a man just met! This is NOT one of those shitty romance novels you read! Just. Act. Normal!

“Um, good afternoon Professor…?”

“Bazarov.” he added, “Can I help you?”

Oh God, that rumble, that thick accent AWOOGA-

“Oh, um, I just wanted to be somewhere quiet. Cafeteria’s kinda loud. I could leave if I’m intruding.”

He waves off your concern with a smile. “No, you can stay. Just clean up after yourself, all right?”

“Oh- uh- okay!”  You sit behind one of the desks, looking through the paper bag. You found a spoon, along with a container of mashed potato and gravy. “Excuse me, sir.” you pipe up, holding out the items, “Have you eaten lunch yet?”

“Ah,” he looks at the clock above him, “Haven’t actually.”

“I can’t eat this whole thing by myself so…Do you eat mashed potato?”

For a second, you see a pink tint on his cheeks, flabbergasted. He walks over to your desk and you move over so he can sit beside you.“Thank you, I’ll have to repay you later.” 

Your face warms, “Your welcome. You don’t have to do anything for me though, I’m just happy you won’t starve till classes are out.”

You both spend the next ten minutes eating and making small talk. He asks about your parents, your major, your hobbies(he seems to be into some of them too), …if you’re taken at the moment. You flushed at the question and confessed that you were a single pringle for the time being

As you clean up after yourselves, your mom calls you, letting you know she’s in the parking lot. As you bid him goodbye, he asks “Before you go, what is your name?”

You mentally facepalm; you ate lunch with this guy and you never introduced yourself?

“(Y/N)! (Y/N) (L/N)!” you say before rushing out the door, heaving your bag over your shoulder. “Have a good day!”

“You too, dear!”

When you get into your mother’s car, the “dear” finally hits you. 

Your face burns up to hell. 

***

Last Week Before Finals, Dec. 20XX

You awaken with a startle after a stranger puts their hand on your shoulder. Your head snaps up to see a familiar face beside you. “O-Oh! Pro. Bazarov?” 

He gives you a trademark, warm smile. “Good evening. I found this near one of your classes.” The professor places a paperback on the desk, the cover features a mask and a whip, along with a title in crimson, graceful calligraphy . “Is this yours-?”

You slap an arm down on it and drag it over to yourself, hunching over it. “IT’S- it’s- it’s my mom’s Christmas present! It’s one of her guilty pleasures. Loves this author- loves them!” you squeak, lightheaded from all of the blood rushing to your face. 

“I’m glad I found it then.” The older man chuckles, and you suspect that he’s seen through your perfectly worded falsehood. To your relief, he changes the subject. “What are you doing at the library so late, hmm? You’re never here after dark.”

“Oh- um…I needed internet.”, you slump in your chair, crossing your ankles. “The whole neighborhood’s power went out this morning, and I really need to finish this essay.”

“When is it due?” he asks as he bends over to look at your assignment.

“Tonight; midnight, actually.”

“What will you do after the library closes?”

You roll your eyes as you sit back up. “I mean, I have an hour left, right?”

“It’s 7:55; the library closes in five minutes.”

Your eyes snap open, as though you heard footsteps while you were home alone. “No- wait!” your eyes dart to your laptop’s clock.

7:57 pm

FUCK.

“Godammit!” you squeak, shutting down your laptop and sloppily shoving your charger and books into your bag. “Shit, shit, shit!”

You feel tears prick your eyes as your brain begins to catastrophize in overdrive.

You’re on scholarship. This is the week before finals. You can’t risk a failing grade. You can’t afford university. Your grades are going to drop. You won’t be able to study. Your parents will kick you out. You’ll have to work minimum wage. You’ll be homeless. You’ll die. You weren’t ready for this. You weren’t ready for this. You weren’t ready for this. You weren’t ready for this. You weren’t ready for this. You weren’t ready for this. You weren’t ready for this. You weren’t ready for this-

A calloused hand wipes a tear from your face. Oh shit, did you start crying? “Hush, no tears little bird.” 

“I’m sorry.” you sob, “I just- just-!” You take a deep breath and scrape the tears off your face, but your mouth is still wrenched into a frown. 

“No worries. You could stay over at my house and finish the assignment there, if you don’t mind.”

Your muscles stop straining a frown on your face at those words. “Really? Do I…need to pay you back or something?”

“No,no. I need to pay you back. Besides, you’re already having a hard time.” without a cue, he picks up your bag and heads towards the ground floor. 

“Oh, thanks! W-wait up!” you forget to push your chair in as you chase him down the stairs.

***

Pro. Bazarov is a speedemon, you learn after he passes two or four (maybe five???) red lights. Shockingly enough, not a single officer pulled you over. Either the professor was too fast to be identified or the local force was just used to him. When the road turns into a path in the woods, he slows down, to the relief of your turning stomach. 

In a clearing, Pro. Bazarov pulls up to a cabin with a chicken coop and a …cow pen? 

“You have animals?” you ask, awe in your voice.

“Is cheaper in the long run. If I want milk, cheese or eggs; it’s here.” he answers with a shrug, taking the key out of the ignition. 

“You make cheese?”

“Eh, easier said than done. But it’s better than the plastic they sell at the supermarket.”

Oh my God, is he talking about sandwich cheddar?

As you slide out of your seat and onto the snow sprinkled soil, you hear something thumping. Panting.

All of a sudden, your legs are attacked by a furry mass of fury. You squeal in terror as you squirm back into the car with canines snapping at your ankles. 

The professor comes over to your side and yells, “Medukva, ostanovka! They’re a guest.”

The bear (dog???) stops haranguing you, stepping back but still staring at you. Gingerly, you step back out, keeping your eyes on the bear(?). The animal approaches you, sniffing and brushing around your legs. “My apologies, she’s territorial.” 

“Heyyyy there.” you speak warily, “Do you think I can pet her?”

“You can, I’m sure she won’t bite.”

You put a hand on Medy’s head and stroke it. A pleasant rumble comes from her and she leans into your hand. “Aww, she’s adorable when she’s not trying to kill me.”

The professor takes your hand and waves off Medy, “Come along now, you still have an essay to finish, don’t you?”

“Oh- yes!” you follow him inside the house obediently.

***

Your essay is finished and submitted, you pump two hands. “DONE!” 

The professor walks in, in nothing but sweatpants and a black tank top (ohhh Goddd you can see his muscles), and reeks of yeast and flour. “Good job.”

“I was really overthinking the word count. I went over it, actually.” you run a hand through your hair habitually. 

“I’m going to say this, since you probably do not hear this enough.” He walks over and embraces you. You squawk as you feel a hand stroke your back . “I’m proud of you.” he murmurs in a tone so intimate. 

He pulls away from you, ignoring your embarrassed state. “Would you like some bread? It’s fresh out of the oven.”

He’s a malewife.

“Yes please!” you leave your laptop to charge in his study. 

Going down the hall to the kitchen, you see framed photos of a much younger professor, accompanied by a young boy or two. The photo above the kitchen’s doorway presents the professor smiling at the camera and a tiny, green-eyed version of him pouting.

“Professor? Who’re the kids in the photos?” you ask impolitely. Damn, that was too forward.

“Oh, those are my sons.”

“Sons?” you walk over to a rectangular table with four chairs. You take a seat at the right and slouch a little. “I was under the impression you lived alone.”

He places a plate of butter in the middle of the table. “I do live alone.”

Oh. “I see, sorry I asked, professor.” 

“No need for apologies.” he says as he places a plate of bread in front of you. “And you don’t have to refer to me so formally. Just call me Vanya.”

“Yes sir, I mean- Vanya.”

***

Vanya leads you down a corridor and pulls out a set of keys. Plucking one off of the ring, he unlocks the middle door. “You’ll be sleeping here, all right?” He hands the key to you and pushes the door open. The room is simple; there’s a small bed in the corner with a night stand beside it, and a mirror on the other end of the room. “Is this room suitable? If not, I wouldn’t mind sharing my bed with you.”

You shake your head furiously, “N-no! The room’s fine; I’m good. Goodnight!” Before you can make your retreat, he catches you by the shoulder. “Vanya?” His hand crawls up your neck and cups your cheek, a thumb stroking it. A shiver runs up your spine. “W-What’s up?”

Vanya leans in, your noses nearly touching. “You always get so red around me. Dear me, you’re as red as a rose. It’s adorable.”  His thumb brushes your lips. 

Vanya kisses you on your forehead. You think you would have died if he kissed you on the mouth.

“Sweet dreams, little bird. Bathroom’s the last door on the end, okay?”

You give him a nod, and he leaves you standing dumbfounded in the doorway.

***

When you wake up, the sun’s not out but the sky’s gotten brighter. You instinctively feel around for your phone, and when you find nothing, you remember that you left it in Vanya’s study. You got up out of bed, and left your bedroom, going left of the kitchen, back to the study.

You open the door to see that your devices are missing. Just great.

You go over to the dining hall to find the ring of keys and a note on the table. You pick it up and read it. 

Good morning, (Y/N). If you are reading this, I am outside checking my traps, or tending to the animals.

Oh my, a huntsman too?

There is kasha and coffee on the stove. Help yourself to some coffee and porridge, if you’d like.

Vanya

P.S: Sugar and cream are in the left cupboard and I’d recommend having some candied fruit with the kasha; those are in the cabinet just before the cream and sugar.

You peered over at the stove to see a steaming kettle and pot. Is he spoiling you, or courting you? Does he think you’re starving just because you’re a college student (let’s be honest, you’ve been living on fast food and frozen dinners for a month)? You look at the clock and see that it’s 6:30.

Weird, your phone should’ve gone off by now-

BEEP. BEEP.  BEEP. BEEP. BEEP. BEEP.

There’s the loud and obnoxious bitch. 

You hear it coming from below you. You follow the sound through the floorboards, and it leads you to a cellar door. It’s locked of course, but you have the keys. You Naruto run to and from the kitchen, swiping the keys. After the first five keys, the sixth key works. You open a door to darkness. You feel the walls for a light switch, you find one and flick it on. A small hanging lightbulb illuminates the room. 

You regret turning on the light. You regret going down the stairs.

You walk up to a desk with your noisy phone, laptop, and student file. You pick up the folder, look it over.

Your address is underlined.

Taking your phone and shutting off that stupid alarm, you open one of the desk’s drawers. Inside it lay photos of you and a digital camera. You pick one of the photos and you recognize the area, the time of day by the sun’s flare.

These photos were taken at your orientation.

At the back of the drawer, the reality of your situation sets in. Wire cutters.

OH FUCK.

He took your devices so you couldn’t contact the outside.

You place all of the items on the desk. You turn on your phone to see notifications of your mom’s panicked texts. You simply reply with

Me: Call the cops.

You open your camera app and start taking live video. You back up with your phone outstretched, so future viewers can see the evidence and the room. You back up to the door; the final shot looks like you’re showing off a Minecraft build.

You’re yanked through the doorway and your phone slips from your hand and falls into the cellar. The house keys are torn off your wrist. The door slams shut, locks, and Vanya keeps a palm on it for good measure. He stinks of soil and blood.

You both meet eyes, but not in the sexy, dominating manner you’ve seen in bodice rippers. While his stature looms over you, you can see panic in his shrunken pupils. You can’t fight Pro. Bazarov, a man who has built muscle from years of constant labor. So, you do the next best thing-

You run to the kitchen.

You practically bodyslam into the backdoor, the knob digging into the fat of your side. You push yourself off the door to grab the knob and twist and twist and twist- it’s locked.

Pro. Bazarov comes thundering in behind you, and you quickly dive under the table. As you get to your knees, the professor does the same and pins you on the oven. You’re both pressed flush against one another, and the only free parts of your body are your arms, which you flail about defiantly. He catches you by your left arm and pins it down, “Calm down! Just let me explain!”

“Explain what?!” you screech as you try to buck him off with your hips, it’s an exercise in futility though. You search the stove for something, anything to grab. You find a handle, and bring it down on Pro. Bazarov’s head. In a second the man is covered in hot porridge and wacked over the head with a hot pot. He throws himself back, going down and taking the table with him.

“AGGGHHHH!”

He drops the keys.

You snatch the keys and bolt for the back door once more. Luckily, the first key works and you bolt out into the winter morning. Who gives a shit about a sweater or shoes? You’re escaping a criminal dammit. 

Unfortunately, Medy comes bolting after you, teeth bared. You take a look at your surroundings, and spot a bear trap in the snow. You go around it, but Medy ignores that. You don’t look behind you as you hear her howl in pain. “Sorry.” you whisper.

Now you’re tearing through the trees, bolting across frozen streams and looking for an end to the trees.

Poignantly, you never really escape. 

As you pass two birch trees, grown as though they were a gate to the fae, the ground gives out beneath you.

“NO!”

You fall into a pit. A sickening crunch could be heard as your leg broke. You scream and sobbed like you’ve never before. You curl up into a fetal position and leave your broken leg laying free as though it does not belong to you. Before you is a dark hall that mocks you.

***

You wake up to a warm hand on your face. 

You open your eyes to see-

A bandaged Pro. Bazarov caressing your face.

“No. Nonononononononononononononononono.” you go on and on, knowing that you cannot run this time.

“Look what you’ve gone and done.” his voice is a scolding whisper, he strokes the thigh of your broken leg. “You’ve gone and hurt yourself. This is why you should’ve stayed.”

You look past him to see another person standing behind him, you cannot make them out with your vision, blurry from crying. The professor looks to the stranger, “Would you mind holding them down? I cannot do two jobs at once.” They nod at him.

The stranger walks behind you and sits you in their lap. Using one hand, they grab you by the wrists and press your hands into your lap. Their other hand grips you by the chin, revealing your neck. 

You gasp as a needle is pressed into your neck. 

You don’t fight back, what’s the point?

“Good,” the professor coos. “You’re being so good for me right now.”

When he removes the syringe, the stranger drops you on your back. 

“Zaichik, don’t be so rough with them.” 

“Whatever.” the stranger says with a vocal eyeroll. “Hope they’re worth it, old man.”

The last thing you see is a black cloth being thrown over you.

[weneverlearn]

Death of Samantha and the Blizzard Drive

Death of Samatha, 1988, on the shores of Lake Erie, most definitely not in the wintertime

Among the many fun-if-maddening things about YouTube is the odd ways in which fanatical nabobs post things. Let's just say they're not all SEO experts.

While anyone who has followed this blog, read my book, or spent more than 25 minutes talking to me at some point knows, I 'm a huge Death of Samantha fan. So I recently stumbled on these YouTube clips that do not list DoS at all in their titles, and hence were a treat to discover.

I was actually at the February 26, 1990 show in these live clips. New Bomb Turks guitarist Jim Weber drove up from Columbus, OH, to Cleveland with me and our roomie pal, Brian Duran. It's about a two-hour trip, but well worth it cuz DoS were always good, and hadn't been down to Columbus in awhile. Hard to tell from the dark, somewhat static film work here, but believe you me, it was a great show.

Nothing to do with snow, but gives you an idea of the pretty good local TV we had in Cleveland at the time that informed Death of Samantha's sense of the absurd...

The club was the Babylon a-Go-Go, a small, narrow joint tucked into an alley off W. 25th St., then a fairly desolate area (except for the excellent Great Lakes Brewing Company, where Eliot Ness used to hang out at the end of his career; it's still there). The "stage" was just the area right next to the bar, so you sort of sat on stools craning your neck at the band, or stood around.

As per usual with such wonky joints, it nonetheless made for a great place to see a band. Dates escape me at this point, but as the club gained a lil' following, they knocked down a wall, added a proper stage, and continued on as a solid club for I think about 4 more years. I saw an amazing L7 show there, Jonathan Richman, lots of good local bands, and they held Stiv Bators' official wake there in June, 1990, a monumentally interesting and fun event I have previously written about here -- check the bottom here and see the video tribute John Waters sent that was played at the event (along with ones from Iggy Pop and Lydia Lunch).

Bloated with fine rock'n'roll and craft beer (then a new trend in Cleveland), we hit the road home -- only to drive right into a huge blizzard. As traffic stops got increasingly packed, we tried a couple side road exits that got us nowhere, and ended up back on I-71 into more scary, slippery two-mph slogs.

Death of Samantha, 1988

At one point, while sitting in a miles-long jam, it was decided that getting out to pee on the side of the road would no doubt coincide with the traffic starting to move, and one of us chasing the car; but more pertinently, it was just cold and blistery as hell out. Then suddenly, the empty Pringles can (that night's dinner on the way to the show), smiled up from the car floor, offering relief.

Let's just say that that moment, in that dark backseat, with the strains of the Replacements wafting out of the tape deck, I learned the rough volume size of my bladder, as did the floor of that back seat.

It took us nearly seven hours to get back to Columbus, finally bounding out of the car with no regrets. That's how good Death of Samantha was. (Easy for me to say though, I didn't do any of the driving.)

The infamous blizzard of '78 in Cleveland

Climate change has added another layer of nostalgia to this tale, as it seems we just do not get big snowstorms like that anymore. Yeah, it still snows in Cleveland, but not in those massive pile-ups that remain stuck on the edges of sidewalks and mall parking lots gaining smog and car exhaust veneers until they gamely try to ward off the late-March melt...

[presidentkamala]

Been living/eating irresponsibly enough that i NEED to make a change; i'll keep all food/weight notes under a cut or a tw for anyone who doesn't need or want to see it.

Ws: Not becoming a demon at work, getting in 17k steps (thanks to an extremely energetic lunch break walking around the mall and then walking to dupont instead of just going to metro center; the wonders a beautiful day out will do), successfully showering before work AND lotioning, putting a load in the washing machine BEFORE work, and remembering to fill up my water bottle

Ls: could NOT get to sleep before at least 2 30 am mainly bc i was revenge bedtime procrastinating and also because i always tell myself "when i get up i'll do xyz and then go to sleep" and it starts to feel like a rule bc i dont WANT to do xyz and so i don't "have" to do it if i keep just rotting and scrolling and dont get up. I feel like i am CONSTANTLY having to relearn that i DON'T have to do xyz and i can just do x, or yz, or just z, etc. Woke up late again this morning w a pounding headache and had to skip breakfast and then my teabag ripped and it was gross trying to drink hot particle water so i had to dump out my tumbler before getting on the train. Then i was starving by the time i got to the office so i picked up a croissant and some mango juice and spent the rest of the day picking through freaking office candy even though i had successfully weaned myself off it months ago!!!! The real low point was getting green pringles at 4pm knowing i had delicious delicious real food waiting for me at home and no way to get to it.

Im just really struggling with cutting down the sugar in my diet and eating a regular, filling amount- even when i plan out my meals and snacks it feels like it doesn't matter i just find ways of getting these super salty, super sweet snacks so im trying to at least get some fiber involved by snacking on grapes, trail mix, etc

Need to brainstorm non-candy ways of coping with work stress while in the office but it feels like the only other thing i can come up with is walking as fast as possible away from my desk and getting away with a cheeky tumblr scroll WHICH ISNT ANY BETTER lmao

[angelbl-00-d]

7/21/24 (limit 1,200)

Breakfast:

Rice chew (15)

Lunch:

Protein bar (200)

Dinner:

Cheese omelette (262), banana pancakes (83), plum (33), nectarine (51)

Snacks:

Puffs (50), lil crunchies (35), konjac jelly (10), max mallow (30), kitkat (160), pringles (150)

Drinks:

Coffee (10), monster (10), sparkling water (0)

Water: 77oz/2.27L

Total: 1,099

I had a LOT of snacks today Because i delivered food all day but I stayed on top of it even though it was a metab day so we're all good

[keefwho]

May 13 - 2024 Monday

10:36pm

6.5/10

I had a very busy day today. I woke up and immediately took my shower. Then got dressed and had mom drive me to the grocery store for the month's groceries. I ended up getting a LOT, more than usual. I went all out, maybe because I was starving. I don't regret it though, I just bought maybe 1.5-2 months worth of some foods. I nearly needed 3 carts to get it all, but that was due to paper towels and other such taking up volume. At the checkout I let this guy go ahead of me that was in a hurry. The cashiers knew him. He was very thankful, he said it twice. I had to insist that he go ahead of me because he declined the first time. I don't think I came off as weird or awkward like I usually do, I kept telling myself it's all just like VRchat. No one really cares that much, if anything the richness of life comes from all these unpredictable social experiences. I also made a little conversation with the old cashier lady. When it came time to check out, I had a little emergency because it turned out I didn't have my debit card on me even though I tried to make sure I had it before I left. I mistook the feeling of my ID for my card. I realized my dad never gave it back to me after he used it to take out my rent. I ran outside to mom where we tried to scrounge up $450 in cash but we were a hundred short. She let me use my dad's credit card which thankfully went through. On the way home I got a slim jim and played my vaporwave music over the car speakers. At home I put away all my groceries and joined BR and them in a VC while I ate "breakfast" which was a teriyaki ramen bowl.

In stream I warmed up with more torso stuff since I've been struggling with the subject lately. I realized maybe I was being too structured and mathematical about it all so I became looser with how I was capturing the forms. For work I finished the commission I was working on which came out great and I sketched SK's thing and got her payment. Also got GZ's Venus comic ready. I ended 30 minutes early since I had done all my work and needed time to think on an idea for a Venus fallout piece as requested by a Patron.

During lunch BR DMed me and invited me to join in her art server VC where FY was too. This is the first time I can remember her inviting me to anything directly in a long while so I couldn't say no. It was a fun call, she was drawing vore and everyone was just vibin. I got boolied a lot as usual but not in a bad way. For lunch I wasn't too hungry since I ate breakfast late so I just had 1/3 the jar of pizza flavored pringles. I played Roblox horses until it was work time, then I screen shared the request I had to do and the pic I'm working on for DS of her horse. Then I worked about 45 minutes on the world for PZ. The VC had disbanded halfway through that so I put a Minecraft stream on the side to listen to. DS called me near the end so we hung out while I finished and she worked on her fursuit hooves. We watched some furry con content while I played KSP and then a few episodes of Moral Orel. THEN a good episode of She Ra. As is common sometimes, neither of us seemed to have a good idea of what to watch or engage in. Usually I'm down to watch anything and watching is the only option since she's working on stuff. But I get that it can be fun to submit to someone else's suggestions so I want to have some ready. She headed upstairs while I made a chicken strip and fries for dinner. We did puzzlies and I started playing the PC Monster High game for her, we came up with a skeleton girl named Patella and I actually like her a lot.

[mrs-allsunday]

Thank you 2023

I finally found the time to write! I wanted to spend a solid 20mins here but I already spent the last 5mins cleaning up my spilled berocca.

I'm also eating pringles now - oh life's sweet poison.

I spent the day rewatching one piece while looking after Yanah. I mean it in a sense that I'm letting her lead the play, I honestly don't think it's how they portray it on reels like an "absent" parent.

There are moments that we play, and times that I let her be.

I guess no right or wrong thing when it comes to parenting, eh?

We can really just see years and years from now with the hopes that she turns out a socially responsible person I aspire her to be.

But that's not for me to decide, right?

Right?

Well anyway, it's been 7 years since I last celebrated new year in the Philippines.

I've really gotten used to it already - no grand welcome, no fireworks, no "buffet". lol

Mostly, I'm already in bed when the clock strikes to 12.

Nevertheless, it has been peaceful the past years. No Christmas gathering of sorts - only the times at my old flat and my first year here with my neighbour from the Philippines.

Frankly, I cannot remember how we welcome the new year last year. lol

For now, I'll write about how we spent this new year's weekend!

Yanah finally received her first dose of Hep A vaccine! We intended to schedule her for one last November but we had to postpone it because things got busy plus me and Adi got COVID.

Then we all went back home to rest. Though I cannot really do that because our house was a mess. So I spent the day decluttering, folding clothes and cleaning! Adi did his fair share of tasks, and the day ended fine with me binge eating doritos while rewatching one piece!

NYE, we went out to Orchard to shop for Adi's stuff and look for a paper cutter for my project planner.

Having Yanah around, we're forced to become morning people and go to the mall on its opening hours lol

Yanah fell asleep after lunch so we had some peace and quiet while window shopping!

Before heading back home, we stopped by at Canberra Plaza to buy dinner and some groceries. Then, we walked back instead of taking bus.

Yanah stayed on her pram the whole time so that's really good. She kept on saying "it's cold, it's cold" though lol

So night came, and we put yanah to sleep after our usual night routine - eat, shower, play, sleep!

Adi and I then worked on my planner and finally printed it after so many hiccups 🤣

I'm really blessed with a crafter husband and he actually did the bulk of the work!

Adi went to sleep earlier than me and I continued cleaning up.

I sent some NYE greetings before going to sleep around 11+.

Adi and I woke up around 1am because Yanah had a night terror again and he greeted me a happy new year ❤️

With that, we're off to welcome Year 2024!

[markandtrish]

Vancouver

May 12

Another gloriously sunny day but with a gentle sea breeze - just right for a foot slog around Stanley Park!

We set off just after 9am and strolled down Robson Street to the Safeway supermarket. Food prices are high here but we managed to buy bread, cheese, crisps and tomatoes for lunch without quite breaking the bank.

From there it was just a short stroll to our destination - undoubtedly one of the most amazing urban parks in the world. Stanley Park is 100 acres of forests and lakes and a seven miles sea walk path and cycleway around the outside, which we decided to tackle.

After walking round part of Beaver Lake and then stopping to see amazing totem poles that stand 30-40ft tall,we set off against a backdrop of stunning scenery, with snow-capped mountains towering above the skyscrapers of North Vancouver across Vancouver Harbour.

For most of the way there were steep cliffs on the land side so we didn’t see any of the wildlife that lives in the woods - apart from a few of the beautiful jet black squirrels that live here - although there were signs warning to beware of coyotes (the advice given is to stand your ground with your legs and arms out to make yourself look bigger and shout 'go away Mr Coyote' at the top of your voice!)

We did though see plenty of birds along the shoreline including blue herons, cormorants and, of course, seagulls, together with tiny sand martins that live in the sea walls.

On the way we saw a statue that looked very like the little mermaid in Copenhagen but was in fact a girl in a wetsuit!

Just before we walked under the Lions Gate suspension bridge, we stopped to take pictures of the famous Siwash Rock, which is meant to be an ancient North American warrior who was turned to stone as a 'reward' for his good deeds.

Nearing the end of our long walk we were almost out of water but the thought of the concession stand marked on the map at Third Beach spurred us on.

Unfortunately we arrived to find it closed and the nearby upmarket restaurant wasn't selling takeaway bottles water to the likes of us!

Sat on a bench looking out to sea to eat our lunch and drink the last of our water, then trekked on to Second Beach to find the fast food shack was actually open!

Bought ice lollies - Mark raspberry and Trish mango - and ate them on the beach. Delicious!

Almost at the end of the sea walk we stopped for more refreshments at the Stanley Park Brewhouse. With our legs feeling increasingly tired we criss-crossed across town, stopping at a dollar bargain store to buy a plug which meant we could have a lovely relaxing bath after a rest-up at the hotel. Chatted to the lady at the store about her plans to visit London with her daughter. Told her June and September were probably the best months - she was so thrilled with the advice she gave us free packets of Ferror Rocher and Pringles when we left.

After a lovely bath we walked down to Davie Street for a quick beer before eating at La Belle Patate - a speciality poutine diner. Poutine is a local delicacy - chips and cheese curds smothered in a tasty gravy. Mark had his with Cajun chicken, Trish had a smoked meat sandwich with fries. Very filling!

Strolled back up to Robson Street for a last drink before heading home after a day of 17,500 steps each!

[wonyoungcherry]

Ugh I had such a bad day today , first of all , my friend gave me jellies and told me to eat it and I had to eat it in front of her. Then, for lunch I had to eat a pain au Chocolat of else it would be a " wast of food ". Then I finally got to eat a kinder bueno even though I didn't deserve it bc my original plan was to save up calories to eat it but that's definitely worked 🤠. So I only ate one piece which was 31 cals and I gave the rest to people. And then this GIRL gave me a PRINGLE in return and I had to eat THAT as well ugh! I'm so fat and chubby . And then I ate a croissant after my dinner that I ATE as well !!!! I'm going to fast for a MONTH now !!!!

And not only that but I was going so good too , I had a COLLAR BONE 🦴, I swear if it disappears I'm going to fast for two months !!! I was going so GOOD 😭😭.

Any way , I should have seen it because things went down hill after I ate that cupcake . I need to have some self control

[blackenchanting]

Welcome to Ravens Borough episode 17

Somewhere in the unheard of town of Ravens B̸̯̹̲̑́̈́̽̀̈͗͗͗̚͝͠ͅo̸̡̞̳͙̺̟̱̦̤̾̊͆̍͜͝ͅr̵͕̉̆͛͌̒̀͂͋ö̴̳͌̎ṷ̷̞̝̩̱̙͉̥͙̬̲̏͘͜͝g̴̡̩̞̯̲̰͓͍͚͆̌̇͜ͅh̵͛̓̉ roughly thirteen years ago…

The contents of this story are nsfw therefore not for children

A long time ago in the town of Ravens Borough

In Silverleaf Elementary School. a young Rob and a young angel were walking down the hallway Robin was making jokes and puns that made Rob groan something fierce as they turned the corner to see a young Eva was being picked on by a couple of boys.

"What're you an alien or something?" One boy asked.

" Some kind of freak more like. Look at her eyes." The other one said as Eva was on the verge of tears.

"She's so small!" The first boy said.

"Hey, buttheads, pick on someone your own size." A young Rob said, walking over.

"What is she to you bro, your girlfriend?" One of the boys asked.

"Does it matter?" Rob asked as one of the boys went to hit him. but Angel's fist quickly made contact with their face, shattering their teeth and sending them against the floor. as he shook his hand from the pain

"Well that's not what I was expecting." Rob said looking at Angel then to the boy as he got back up only for his buddy to have run off.

"You might wanna go find your friend before you end up on the floor again." Rob said as the boy ran off in a random direction.

"Hey, you alright?" Rob asked getting down to check on Eva.

"Y-yeah, I-I'm fine. T-thanks." Eva said.

"No prob, couldn't let someone cool looking be picked on like that." Rob said.

"Y-you think I look cool?!" Eva asked with stars in her eyes and a blush on her face.

"Absolutely." Rob said, helping Eva to her feet.

"W-What's your name?" Eva asked.

"Rob, what's yours?" Rob asked.

"E-Eva." Eva said.

"It's nice to meet you Eva." Rob said.

"Nice to meet you too." Eva said with a smile.

She looked at the two boys as she opened her eyes seeing Rob looking at things on the wall and Robin on the phone in his casual gray crop top and booty shorts

"Weird how I met you guys being heroes essentially." Eva said.

"Hmmm?" Robin said hanging up the phone

"Heh, yeah we did kind of meet because of some annoying boys." Rob said

"I have no idea what you two are talking about" Robin said

"Really angel?" Eva said

"Don't call me that.." Robin said

"You don't remember back in elementary School?" Eva asked.

"Your talking to the guy who can't even remember what he had for lunch an hour ago" Robin said.

"Good point. You were definitely much different when we were younger though." Eva said.

"Doubt it" Robin said

"You knocked a kids teeth out. You were lucky they were already loose." Rob said.

"And id fuckin do it again" Robin replied.

"I mean I would have too but you stepped in." Rob said.

"I have no recollection of this" Robin said.

"Fair enough. But that's how Rob and I met." Eva said.

"Heh, you still look cool." Rob said as Eva became crimson.

Robin held up a finger as he vomited into a trashcan

"Cringe…" he replied. Taking his sleeve over his mouth

"Fuck you, it's cute." Rob said.

"It's fine." Eva said.

"You good though? Or was that just a flare up?" Rob asked.

"All of the above." Robin replied.

"Fair enough. Just making sure. Cause I still care about you and all that." Rob said.

"Mhhmhm you say this every time we hang out" Robin said.

"That's a good point. I'm just trying to make sure there's no bad blood between us." Rob said.

"I moved on a long time ago" Robin said

"Heh. That's fair." Rob said.

"I'm just an unopened can of single pringles" Robin replied

"I'm sure someone will open that can eventually. Given that you let them." Rob said.

"Nah" Robin said

"Once a Pringle always a Pringle" he added.

"Fair enough." Rob said.

"What about that bartender lady? Katelyn?" Eva asked.

Robin stayed quiet

"That's fair." Rob said.

"So what now" Robin asked

"No idea. We were gonna go to my parents place for a bit actually. They found something that I probably should keep here." Rob said.

"He's been very secretive about what. So it's either embarrassing or something cool." Eva said.

"Ehhh.. your parents hate me" Robin said

"I know..you can tag along if you really want to." Rob said.

"I got my important stuff to do then play ass kisser to your parents. No offense" Robin said

"Not like that'd help much." Rob said.

"There are people out there who need my help" Robin said putting his badge on

"You know you can take a break every once and a while right?" Eva said

"I took an oath to serve and protect. So I will answer always" Robin said making his way out the door

"Heh fair enough, see you around." Rob said.

"Anyway we should head out too." Eva said as the couple left the office and got in their car.

A little while and a decent amount of driving later the Impala's engine rumbled as it pulled into the driveway of a well maintained two story brick house with a mailbox that read Valentine.

"So what is it that you forgot?" Eva asked.

"Fuck if I know, I honestly have no idea, most of my stuff was already in the office anything else is in a storage locker." Rob said as the couple got out of the car and entered the house to see a man in his late forties sitting in a recliner in cargo pants and a Batman T-Shirt reading a well worn copy of the Batman under the Red Hood graphic novel.

"He totally killed Jason." Rob said.

"There's no way he didn't." The man said, closing the book and getting up from the chair and hugging Rob.

"Good to see you're doing well son." The man said.

"Good to see you too, dad." Rob said.

"Good to see you Dex." Eva said.

"Eva!" Dex said, hugging Eva tightly.

"Please don't break my girlfriend." Rob said as Dex let go of Eva.

"Good point." Dex said.

"So what even is this thing you had for me?" Rob asked.

"No idea, we haven't opened it, not our mail." Dex said.

"Well now I'm even more intrigued." Rob said.

"As am I." Eva said as an older woman with big breasts and wolf ears on the top of her head wearing pantyhose, shorts and a long sleeve shirt entered the room.

"Eva!" The woman said, hugging Eva tightly.

"Rosie. You're smothering the girl." Dex said as Rosie let Eva go.

"Oh right, sorry." Rosie said letting go of Eva.

"I'll go get the package." Dex said.

"That's what you said the other night." Rosie said with a sexy tone as Rob and Eva groaned in disgust.

"Oi! Get a room or wait till we leave." Rob said.

"You two probably fucked on the way here." Rosie snipped back.

"How the hell." Eva said.

"A mother knows dear, a mother knows." Rosie said.

"Anyway here's the thing." Dex said, setting a long wide box on the coffee table.

"Let's open this sucker up." Rob said pulling a pocket knife from his jacket and flicking it open before cutting the tape on the box to reveal a chest shaped box that Rob opened to reveal a large keyblade.

"Well I'll be damned. It took that guy seven years to perfect this replica." Rob said.

"It's a key." Rosie said.

"The Keyblade. You saved up like seven hundred and fifty bucks for it, commissioned a guy and he said it'd take a while and you eventually forgot but he didn't. Because if you remembered you'd have told him you changed addresses." Dex said.

"Oh right I keep forgetting the two most important men in my life are massive fuckin nerds." Rosie said.

"You wish you could forget. There's at least two bookshelves of graphic novels around here. Several of them happen to be yours dear." Dex said.

"So that's what you'll be like in what? Twenty four years?" Eva asked Rob.

"Most likely." Rob said as he was holding the Keyblade.

"We should go. They get… touchy when they get like this." Rob said as Rosie jumped onto Dex wrapping her arms and legs around him.

"Alright yup let's get going." Eva said as Rob grabbed the chest.

The couple returned to their car and drove off.