#pretty pleeeeaaasse

[softgothbabe]

Hold my legs as far apart as you can while you penetrate me as deep as you can

[moni-logues]

Kintsugi 4

Pairing: Yoongi x reader

Genre: strangers-to-friends-to-lovers, non-idol!au, angst, smut, tiny bit of eventual fluff

Summary: In a fit of spiteful, post-break-up self-improvement, you sign up to a baking class. Yoongi, in a bid to appease his demanding girlfriend, signs up, too. Determined to make him your friend, you end up with more than you ever imagined.

Word count: 8.1k

Content: none! there is no content lmaooo nah there is just none that needs to be warned for, I don't think, so enjoy freely!!!!!

A/N: I know, I know, it's taken an age but here we are!! And I'm honestly kind of nervous to see how people react!!!! huge thank you to my betas @blog-name-idk @amethystwritesbts and @here2bbtstrash

Chapter Three | Masterlist | Chapter Five

Chapter Four – Someone Old, Someone New 

The message came in shortly after lunch. 

Mei.97: hey girl! Long time no see!!! I’m going to be in Seoul this week, pleeeeaaasse tell me you’re free for dinner tomorrow?!!? It’s been too long!!! Xxx 

You had to read the message twice to be sure you were reading it right. You hadn’t heard from Mei—an old university friend—since your first ‘breakdown’. You wondered what on earth she could want. But you weren’t in any position to be turning down an outreached hand. 

You: sure! It would be great to see you! 

A few months ago, that would have been a huge lie. Now, it was only a little one. You weren’t looking forward to having to smooth over the details of your breakdown, or your break-up, but you had been close as students and it would be easier with her—she moved back to Busan after graduating, so you could put a little bit of the blame for your losing contact on that, too. You knew you weren’t quite there yet, but you felt like you were healing, you were making progress; you sometimes even felt, on occasion, pretty good about life. And you wanted to share that.  

The first thing you heard upon walking into the bar you had suggested was the loud screech of your name. Then Mei was running over. You had barely even noticed her before she was wrapping her long arms around you in a huge hug. Her hair was as long and silky as it had ever been; she was still wearing the same perfume she always used to wear, and too much of it, as she always had; she looked almost exactly the same, except a little richer, a little chicer, like someone who had truly settled into themselves. She outshone the whole restaurant and looked as if she didn’t notice, as she always used to. The real world didn’t seem to have dimmed any of her at all. You were pleased with yourself that this didn’t make you completely sick with envy. 

“Girl, oh my god, it is so good to see you! You look amazing! I can’t believe it; you’ve barely changed! Love the hair, though,” she announced to basically the whole bar. 

You’d forgotten that she was possibly the only person in the world who was louder and talked more than you did. You’d forgotten how much you liked her. You had no need to be nervous, you realised, because it would never occur to her to judge someone; she just wasn’t that sort of person because she wouldn’t even have the time for it. She was more than just a rolling stone: this rolling stone had an engine and jet fuel. 

“I ordered a bottle of wine because I wasn’t sure if you were still into the same drinks and I figured, wine is a safe option, right? You want some?” she asked but she was already pouring into your glass. “Tell me everything, babe. It has been so long. What is up?” 

You took a deep breath. Where to start? 

* 

You marvelled at how painless the night had been. It was fun. Somehow, despite all the discussion you’d had about your life since university, your life now, it wasn’t painful. Not really. Mei was single, too, and courting every man in Busan before her parents tightened the screws on her to settle down. She was enjoying working for the family business (if a corporation can be called merely a ‘business’). She was earning a salary that made you wince and made her promise dinner was on her. You were doing reasonably well in your career, too, actually. You were earning enough to live in Seoul on your own. Things weren’t perfect, but Mei was such a positive and enthusiastic steam-roller that she made you feel like you were thriving, not wilting. She was exactly what you needed.  

You were just wishing that she didn’t have to leave Seoul, that she could move and stay forever when she took her ice-cream spoon from her mouth and looked sheepishly at her empty bowl. 

“I have a confession to make,” she began. “I had a teeny ulterior motive for asking you to dinner.” 

Your stomach lurched. 

“Oh?” 

“You remember my cousin Sungbin? He came to visit that time at uni?” 

“The one we had to carry back to your room?” 

“You mean the one we had to find someone else to carry back to my room?” 

“Yes!” You laughed. “Yes, I remember! How could I forget?” 

He was a sweet, tall drink of water who accepted every shot and drink foisted on him by his cousin and her friends until he passed out in the bar. You and Mei had dragged him through the streets of Hongdae asking every passerby if they could help you get him home. You didn’t remember who actually helped or much of the rest of the night, but that arduous 100-meter drag was almost as painful as your hangover had been the following day. 

“What about him?” 

“Ok, so my uncle is retiring, right? He’s still going to be on the board but he’s retiring from his actual position so, of course, Sungbin, oldest son, he’s got to step up. He's moving to the big city, girl! Taking up a position at the HQ here. My ulterior motive is me asking you a huge favour.” 

“What’s the favour?” 

“He doesn’t know anyone here, right? Never lived here before. Would you maybe like, take him out for drinks or lunch or something – super casual, no big deal! – just so he’s got a friendly face? Give him some recommendations for stuff, I don’t know, just so he doesn’t feel overwhelmed and on his own?” 

You didn’t really know how to feel about it. Of course, you would. Of course, you would be happy to take Sungbin out, show him around, help him if he needed. You felt flattered that Mei would even ask you, that she thought you would be up to the job. That she thought of you at all, to be honest. Had you not just been thinking that you needed new friends? And now one was landing straight in your lap.  

It all felt a little too good to be true. It was too easy. Things had been too easy recently; this was just too much good, surely? You weren’t used to this. It felt wrong. Made you anxious. And, usually, that anxiety made you make things worse all on your own. But your therapist had told you to stop looking for the bad, to trust the good, appreciate its presence. You could do that. Right? You could do that. 

“Yeah, sure! Of course, I can take him out.” 

Mei dramatically fell to the table in relief and held tight to both your arms. 

“You are an angel! Thank you! Here’s the bad part, though: any chance you can do it tomorrow? I’m leaving in the morning and he’s going to be on his own for the first time since moving-” 

“Oh, he’s already here?” 

“Yeah! That’s why I’m here, girly! I helped him move! Any chance you’re free tomorrow?” 

You didn’t know how to say yes without letting her know that you were the sort of person who had no plans at the weekend but you didn’t want to say no because you were the sort of person who had no plans, and it would be nice to get out of the apartment. You did not look into the fact that she was asking you this last-minute, assuming you would have no plans already. You shrugged. 

“Yeah, I can do drinks or something tomorrow night?” 

“Babe, you are my favourite person in this whole world. I’m going to give you his number; just text him. He doesn’t know anyone here so he literally has nothing better to do and I’ve already told him I’d put you guys in touch.” 

From anyone else, that might have prickled a little; the assumptions might have rubbed you the wrong way, but Mei was relentlessly optimistic, having never had any real hardship in her life (she would admit to this, too), so she had never had any reason to believe that things wouldn’t go the way she expected. Far from wanting to burst her bubble, you wanted to protect her naivety. Because you wished you could have it, too.  

As you walked and subwayed and walked home, you thought about Mei and her life, and your life, and how different things could be. You wondered who you would be if you weren’t so broken, if your head could just have got its shit together—rather, if your head had never gone to shit in the first place. Would you have been like Mei? Would life have found another way to break you? Were things destined or was everyone, including the universe, just making things up as they went along?  

Could you ever be like Mei? Was anyone like her? Did she have secret pain?  

It wasn’t lost on you, the possibility that she wasn’t as happy-go-lucky as she seemed. The shock and surprise of everyone you knew when you ended up in hospital was almost the worst part. If you never heard someone say ‘I had no idea!’ again, it would be too soon. You thought about it a lot, how normal you were (or weren’t). You couldn’t believe that everyone else went through life not thinking the things you thought, that everyone else was somehow just able to get on with things without the sometimes-debilitating urge to sink into the floor forever. 

You shook your head, because you knew you weren’t supposed to be thinking like this. You’d had a really fun time with an old friend and you were going to have a really fun time tomorrow with a new friend. That was all. There was no need to ruin it by overthinking and second-guessing.  

You tapped a finger nervously on the bar as you sat on your stool. You used to come here a lot, or at least semi-frequently, but you hadn’t ventured into this part of the city since you moved out of the apartment you had shared with your ex. He got the apartment, so he got the neighbourhood, too.  

You couldn’t really miss it, not on its own, because your life had changed dramatically after the break-up: you moved somewhere else, lost most of your friends, and stopped going out. This was really the only ‘out’ that you knew. And, crucially, it was close enough to Sungbin to become his neighbourhood, too. So here you were, tapping at the bar, staring at the door, trying not to gulp your drink and be drunk before he even arrived.  

It was bright and hot and humid. It had rained solidly for three days and the water still hung in the air, clung to your skin, even as the sun tried its best to burn it away. You pressed your palm against your cold glass and tried to will yourself cooler without success. You already felt sticky with sweat and you didn’t know if that was entirely down to the weather, or if your nerves were also to blame.  

You knew you didn’t have to be so nervous. What was the worst that could happen? Taehyung had, very patiently, talked you through it: all possible outcomes, all likely scenarios, best- and worst-case situations; he had reminded you that you were an adult human being who knew how to speak to other people. You did. You did know. But it had been a very long time since you had been in this situation. It wasn’t a date. Obviously, it wasn’t a date, but it was the closest you had got to one for many years; you were meeting a man, in a bar, alone. You didn’t know each other; you were hoping he would like you.  

You took another gulp of your drink and repeated Taehyung’s words back to yourself. You reminded yourself of how good things were, ran through your gratitude list, tried to persuade yourself not to psych yourself out before the date (it was not a date! NOT. A. DATE.) had even begun. 

You had turned from the door, realising how awkward it might be for you to have to stare at each other as he walked towards you and were now just glancing over your shoulder every single time you heard the door open. To stop it being awkward. You had done well to pace yourself and it was as you lifted your glass to your lips for another sip that you heard someone call your name. You turned and came face to face with a man you knew could not be Sungbin. 

“Hi,” he said somewhat awkwardly as you continued to drink. “I don’t know if you remember me but I’m Mei’s cousin, Sungbin.” 

You gasped as you drank and it all came out in a choke and a splutter and you were blushing and fumbling to put your glass down, find a napkin, rewind time by ten seconds. The napkin came from his hand and you took your time drying your face and hands to try to will your blushes away. You were so embarrassed you could barely look at him.  

And there was so much of him to look at. This was not tiny, tall drink of water Sungbin from your university days. He was huge. He must have grown at least six inches taller, not to mention wider. His biceps were the size of thighs and his thighs were almost bursting out of his skinny jeans. You didn’t know where to look. 

“You can’t be Sungbin!” you cried. “You’ve got to be the guy that ate him!” 

He laughed and tugged at his hair a little self-consciously. 

“Yeah, I guess I’ve grown a bit.” 

“A bit!  You’re... You’re a hulk!”  

You were off your stool and gripping his bicep before he’d even finished the sentence—your fingertips didn’t even come close to touching. You were gawking, gaping, ogling this poor man without an attempt to hide it. You gestured broadly to his entire body with your other hand and only when you looked back up did you notice the blush on his face, the awkward way he averted his gaze. You stood back and gasped again, this time without choking. 

“I’m so sorry,” you told him. “Oh my god, that was so rude of me. I’m so sorry! What a dickhead! This is a terrible first impression for me to be making!” 

“Technically, not a first impression; we have met before.” He chuckled awkwardly. “And I didn’t exactly cover myself in glory then; I was, uh, a little worse for wear, I think.” 

“A little?! We were worse for wear; you were... the worst for wear! I’m amazed you survived.” 

“The joys of youth. Not sure I’d survive doing it now, just in case you had any ideas.” 

“Mei and I could barely get you home then, there is no way on God’s green earth I’d be able to carry you home by myself now! I wouldn’t risk it.” 

“So, we’re agreed then: both getting home in one piece?” 

You lifted your glass. 

“I’ll drink to that!”  

*  

You moved from one bar to the next, almost retracing steps you used to take in what felt like your former life. Sungbin paid great attention to where you were going and what else was around, cataloguing his new area, making notes for his new life. Your nerves were long gone, as were his, and you were enjoying a night out with a relative stranger as if you were a real person who did things like this: a real person who made new friends, who went out at the weekend, who had a proper life again. You had to pinch yourself to make sure this was all really happening, that this was all really going well. Your problems felt miles away, lightyears. You wondered if this is what it felt like to be normal. Whole. Fixed. You made a mental note to tell your therapist. 

You were on a roof terrace, carpeted with fake grass, decorated with fake flowers. Everything was clean and bright and the sun was still high in the summer sky. It was still a little too warm and a little too sticky, your glasses sweating as well as your bodies, but the lightest of breezes lifted the ends of your hair every now and then, and you couldn’t have imagined a more comfortable feeling than the soft rush of wind across your hot skin. You took seats under a white, wooden pergola where the sunlight was dappled through the fronds twisted along the frame.  

This heat usually enervated you, made you lethargic and sloth-like. That night, though, sitting under fake foliage, you felt solar-powered. There was a summer spring in your step. You felt, dare you believe it, like you were glowing. Like a butterfly emerging from its cocoon. A brand new thing. A better thing. Being here, an old place, with Sungbin, a new friend, could have felt awkward, uncomfortable, like trying to fit a square peg in a round hole—you had expected it to—but no. You felt bigger and brighter, not smaller and duller. You were conscious of the possibility of your old life encroaching on your new one, the possibility of running into someone you used to know, but you decided to push those thoughts away. Compartmentalise them. Ignore them. You didn’t need them.  

Sungbin was talking about his ex. It was an awkward break-up; they’d not been together long enough for her to move to Seoul with him, or for him to even ask her to, but it had been long enough that it felt significant, felt like throwing something away when they ended things. But he was young and he wasn’t worried. You didn’t say it out loud but you thought to yourself that a man like him surely would never have to worry: looking like he did, having the position he had, being a sweet, polite kind of guy; women would be queueing up for even a chance with him.  

“I don’t really miss her that much, because there’s so much going on here that I haven’t really even had the time to. That, if nothing else, tells me it was the right decision for us.” 

The words reached your ears but didn’t go in. You could feel your heart pounding hard in your chest and sweat begin to prick in your palms. Your eyes had flicked over the crowd in front of you, people walking in and out, to and from the bar, looking for tables, looking for friends. They had skimmed over the faces of strangers until they hit upon someone familiar. The face had immediately disappeared back into the crowd, but you were sure it was him. It had to be. Why else would your whole body have gone into panic mode? Why else would your legs be like jelly? Why else would your fingers feel numb? A quiet ringing grew louder in your ears and you kept looking for him again, waiting for that dark head above a white shirt to break through the crowd again. You had to be sure it was him. 

“Are you ok?” 

You wanted to stand. You had to stand and get a better view. You wished it weren’t so busy. Why did it have to be a Saturday night? Why were all these people out?  

“Are you ok?” 

A touch on your arm drew you back and your head span to Sungbin. He looked confused, concerned. 

“I think I saw my ex,” you told him, your voice hoarse.  

“Ah. A bad break-up?” 

Your eyes had already gone back to the crowd, scanning and searching.  

FUCK. 

It was him. It really was him. It had to be. It couldn’t be.  

“Yeah, no, I don’t know,” you answered vaguely. 

You were still staring at him and then his eyes flicked to yours and you flinched so hard you almost knocked over your glass. You turned away, turned back; he looked as surprised as you were. He looked unsure. He looked like he was walking over to you. 

“Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck,” you said under your breath, looking at the table, trying to work out how on earth you were going to handle this. You wondered, if you thought hard enough, if you would be able to make yourself disappear. You wondered if you could just run: leg it out of the bar as fast as you could and not look back. You felt dizzy. You felt sick. You felt... drunk. Too drunk. Of all the places and all the times you might have imagined seeing him again, this wasn’t one. This would probably be the very last place you’d have chosen to run into him.  

Sungbin’s hand was back on your arm, less tentative now. He scooted his chair closer to yours. His hand slid down your wrist and he tangled his fingers in yours. You could only look at him; you didn’t have the mental capacity to even form the question in your mind. 

“Don’t worry,” came his reply. “I got you.”  

Then he winked.  

“Hi.” 

You looked up and there he was. San. Just as he always had been. Maybe his hair was a little shorter, you could kid yourself there was an extra line or two on his face. But it was him, no denying. 

“Hi,” you squeaked back. 

You were trying to think of all the things you wanted to say to him, trying to think of all the things you could say to him, that would be appropriate to say to him here, in this bar, whilst holding the hand of another man. 

“Hi, I’m Sungbin.”  

He was confident. He stuck out his free hand and gave San a generous smile. 

“Oh, uh, San.” 

“Nice to meet you.” 

“Nice to meet you, too.” San turned his face back to you. “How have you been?” 

You looked at Sungbin for help: this relative stranger, this potential new friend pretending to be your new boyfriend in front of your old boyfriend, this man who seemed to have much better control of this situation than you did. You could barely think at all. It was a desperate ringing, alarm bells, sirens wailing, a maelstrom of panic. Sungbin smiled at you. You had no idea how long you looked at him before answering, had no sense of time anymore. 

“Yeah, fine,” you said, eventually tearing your gaze from Sungbin to stare into San and the sun behind him. Sungbin gave your hand a squeeze. “Good, actually. You?” 

“Yeah, same old same old, you know how things are. Didn’t expect to see you here.” 

“Oh, that’s my fault.” Sungbin stepping in to save you again. “I live in the area so I’m always dragging her over this way.”  

You stammered for a second, trying to take in San’s surprise and Sungbin’s sweet, encouraging smile. 

“Y-yeah, he does,” you confirmed. “I don’t- I don’t mind, though, really.” 

“Mm, you always liked this bar. I remember.”  

“Yeah.” 

You noticed the way San’s eyes flicked to your hands, clasped together on the table, not just once but again and again. You wished you could peer inside his head, know what he was thinking.  

You were hardly thinking at all. Your brain was trying so hard to be quick that it had overloaded itself, stalled, got stuck. You couldn’t get over the fact of him, there, in front of you. It had been months. Seasons had changed since you saw him last. You had changed. Could he see that? Did you want him to? Did you want him to miss you? Did you want him to be bothered by Sungbin—gentle giant, Sungbin, holding your hand so casually, talking about you as if you really were together? You tried not to imagine what San was doing there, who he was with. You didn’t know if you would care. You wouldn’t be surprised to learn he was dating. He was a catch, you knew that.  

There were too many things happening at once, too many things to process. You felt like you were spinning out of control. What if San knew Sungbin wasn’t your boyfriend? What if he knew this was all pretend? What if he asked more about it? What if everything unravelled before your very eyes and the ground didn’t show mercy and swallow you whole? 

“Are you still living around here?” San asked you. “I would’ve expected to see you around more.” 

“Oh, uh, no. I’m over the river. I just-…"  

You couldn’t commit yourself to the lie, had to let yourself trail off just looking at Sungbin, desperate for a sign you were doing ok, you were playing this the right way. He grinned at you. 

“Like I said, my fault.”  

He shrugged with a light chuckle and San faintly followed suit, mouth moving but no sound actually coming out. 

“Right, well,” he began in the tell-tale way that said he was backing out of this conversation. “I’d better get back to my table. It was uh, nice meeting you, Sungbin. Good to see you, too-” his eyes rested on you, needled into you like he was searching for something specific in your face. “I’m glad you’re doing well.” 

“Yeah, me too. I mean, me for you, you know what I mean.” 

A genuine smile. And a nod. Then he was retreating back into the sea of people, disappearing and leaving no trace. No trace but the hammering of your heart. No trace but the sweat pooling in your palms and sticking your dress to your back. No trace but the sudden exhaustion of the relief you felt being out of his presence. Sungbin squeezed your hand again. 

“Bad break-up?” 

You rested your forehead on the fingers of your free hand and shook your head. 

“It was for me. It was the right decision but yeah, it was bad for me. I haven’t... I haven’t seen him since I moved the last of my shit out from our apartment – what used to be our apartment.” 

Sungbin nodded knowingly and placed his hand on top of yours just for a second. Then he let you go completely. 

“I’m sorry if I overstepped. I realise I didn’t really give you a chance to disagree; I’m sorry about that. I-” 

You shook your head and waved your hand.  

“It’s absolutely fine,” you reassured him. “It was good, actually.”  

You were deeply grateful for his quick-thinking, presumptuous though it may have been. You wanted to splash your face with cold water, give yourself a shock, try to bring yourself back into the room. You didn’t want to look like you were still completely hung up on your ex; you didn’t want to look like a mess; you just needed a second to take a breath. 

“That was... not expected,” you went on, more for your benefit than for his. “I have thought so many times about what I would say and what I would do if I saw him again but I guess I never really believed it would happen and then suddenly, he was fucking right in front of me and I just felt like dying!” 

Sungbin laughed, as you knew he would, because it was a joke. It was a joke. But you didn’t not feel like dying for at least a second there.  

“When did you break up?” 

“Oh, months ago now. Kind of feels like I should be over it, I guess. I mean, I am, really. I just-...” 

“You were caught off-guard. I get it; it’s rough seeing them again.”  

It was rough. And you believed that he did get it. And he smiled at you so sincerely that you could have cried. It surprised you, that people could be nice to you; that people could like you, even; that people could see you and still smile at you. You looked at each other a little longer, Sungbin’s quiet calm radiating through you, your heartrate slowing and your spinning head coming to a stop. 

“Thank you,” you said as you picked up your glass to take a sip to cover awkwardness that only you felt. “That was quick thinking and um, yeah, I think it helped. You didn’t have to do that.” 

Sungbin shrugged.  

“You’re doing me a big favour tonight; it was the least I could do. Happy to be your fake boyfriend whenever you need!”  

He laughed and then you laughed and it felt good. You drained the last of your drink and Sungbin suggested you go somewhere else for your next one. You agreed. You didn’t look for San on your way out, just kept your eyes on Sungbin’s back as he led you, your hand in his (just in case), back through the bar and out onto the street. 

* 

“You don’t have to literally walk me to my door,” Sungbin said as you stepped into the lift with him. “I maintain that it should be me walking you home.” 

You shrugged. 

“That argument might hold water if you had even half a clue of how to get to my apartment. But you don’t. Besides, I was taking you out tonight; it only follows that I walk you back, too. Why break tradition?” 

Sungbin bit back a grin. 

“How long before I live that down?” 

“Oh, at least five more years.” 

“Well, if you’re going to make me suffer that, don’t you think we should do this correctly? Now, how did it go again?” 

He moved behind you and draped himself over your shoulders, slowly leaning his weight onto you. You cried out and could do nothing but collapse underneath him. 

“NO! I couldn’t carry you then; now you’re just trying to kill me!” 

You knelt on the floor of the lift with your hands outstretched above you, as if they would in any way hold him off. He straightened and pulled you up by them. 

“Fine,” he conceded as he stepped out at his floor. “But next time, you’re going to have to let me walk you home. Deal?” 

You shrugged. You nodded. You didn’t take that as a promise.  

“About your ex,” Sungbin started, standing in front of his door. 

“Yeah?” 

“Where exactly are you at with that?” 

That had you on the backfoot. You didn’t know how to answer the question for yourself, let alone for him. Your first thought was that you probably would have to ask your therapist; did she think you were over it? Would she think you had closure? You blinked and opened your mouth as if somehow an answer would fall out of it without your having to compile it first.  

“I just mean,” he continued, “are you dating? Would it be alright if I asked you out?” 

“Oh, uh, I-”  

Would it be alright? Wouldn’t it be? You had told yourself you were off dating. You weren’t ready for it; you had been emphatic when you’d said as much to Yoongi only a few weeks ago. Was that still true? You had spent so much time that day reminding yourself that this wasn’t a date, but... what if it had been? San aside, it had gone well, hadn’t it? You had had fun; Sungbin seemed like he had, too. He was the one who pretended to be your boyfriend first. Maybe... Maybe it would be ok? Maybe you were ready? There was only one way to really find out.  

“Yeah, I guess that would be fine.” 

He smiled. 

“Good. I’ll do that then.”  

He took your hand in his and pressed a kiss to your knuckles; everything inside you fluttered. Then he winked and dropped your hand to enter his door code. 

“Text me when you get home safe, yeah?”  

You nodded, mute. He smiled at you again. 

“It was really nice to see you again.” And when he said your name, it sounded new.  

You didn’t leave immediately. Couldn’t. You stood outside his apartment, in shock, processing, looking at his closed front door, to the left, to the right, looking for an answer to what just happened. Sungbin did not just ask you out. But he did say he would. He was going to ask you out.  

And you had already kind of said yes.  

To a date. 

You fumbled in your bag for your phone and had it to your ear before you realised you absolutely had to leave, lest Sungbin hear you speaking. You scuttled back down the hallway and into the lift while Taehyung’s phone rang and rang and eventually went to voicemail. You hung up and tried again. And then again. And then you sent him a text. 

You: TEDDY!!! PICK UPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

You tried calling for a fourth time and for a fourth time, you heard the automated voice of his voicemail service.  

You threw your phone back into your bag, defeated, but jittery with nerves and adrenaline. You could barely remember how this felt. In fact, with San you had seen it coming. You had engineered it. You had been flirting for weeks; you practically demanded he ask you out. Then he did. This had come out of the blue. Blindsided you. For the second time that evening. You were so shocked by Sungbin’s question that you had, momentarily, forgotten about running into San.  

What a fucking night. One that you had almost no idea how or where to start processing. Everything was-… you threw your hands in the air, by yourself, in the lift, shaking your head, completely bewildered. Taehyung was your go-to person for this. He was your sounding board. You picked up your phone to call him just one more time.  

* 

Your phone rang as you were changing into your pyjamas and you picked it up with your vest only half pulled down over your chest. 

“Teddy! Finally!” 

“Are you dying?” 

“No.” 

“Are you hurt or injured or maimed in any way?” 

“No.” 

“Then stop calling!” 

“Hey! I need to talk to you!” 

“Well, it’s going to have to wait, princess; I’m busy.” 

“Not even for five minutes?” 

“No.” 

“But I saw San!” 

There was a pause as Taehyung digested the information. 

“Are you ok?” he asked simply. 

“Yeah.” 

“Then it’s going to have to wait until tomorrow.” 

You heard a rustling in the background, another voice. 

“Oh my god,” you gasped, turning your voice down to a loud stage whisper. “Are you with someone?” 

“... Yes.” 

“OH MY GOD! Oh my god, please tell me it’s the barista. Is it the barista? It is, right?!” 

“... Yes.” 

You squealed and fell onto your sofa to kick your feet in the air. 

“WE HAVE SO MUCH TO TALK ABOUT!” you screamed down the phone. 

“Yes, but tomorrow.” 

“Yeah, fine, tomorrow. Oh my god. I am SO excited, Teddybear.” 

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever. I’ll talk to you later. I’m going now.” 

“Bye, Teddy!” 

“Good night, babe; love you.” 

“Love you!” 

It was entirely possible that you weren’t going to be able to sleep at all now.  

You squealed as you opened your door and let Taehyung into your apartment. He handed over an ice-cold, sweating cup of coffee and flopped onto your sofa.  

“Tell me literally everything,” you demanded. 

He merely shrugged. 

“Don’t be fucking coy, you piece of shit! I want to know everything! It’s THE BARISTA.” 

The barista worked at a coffee shop not far from Taehyung’s apartment. The barista was a fine, delicate-boned, ethereal beauty, probably the prettiest person you had ever seen in real life. Even Taehyung—unflappable, cool, calm and collected Taehyung—had been flustered the first time the barista had flashed him his pearly whites. And, last night, something had finally happened between them.  

“There’s really not that much to tell,” Taehyung countered. “I asked him out and he said yes.” 

You hit him hard with a cushion. 

“I said I want to know everything! And you can’t just say it like it was that simple; you’ve been daydreaming about that guy for months!” 

“Firstly, I was sussing out his situation. I understand tact and diplomacy and how to not say every stupid thing that’s in my head at any given moment-” 

“Uncalled for, but go on.” 

“-So I had to bide my time.-” 

“Also, you’re a massive chicken and he made you go knock-kneed and goo-goo-eyed.” 

“-Do you want me to tell you what happened? Or would you prefer to just make up your own version?” 

You cackled. 

“You know I’d love to make up my own story, but no, sorry, I’ll stop interrup-” 

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep, babygir-” 

“Ok, now who’s interrupting?!” 

“I’m the one trying to tell you a story!” 

“Ok! Ok! Fine, spin your yarn and give me the entire confection, please.” 

* 

“I’m seeing him again tonight. Truth be told, I’d be with him right now if someone hadn’t already laid claim to my time.” 

“Teddy!”  

You felt bad for tearing him away from his One True Love, you did. But he’d already seen his success with the barista (Hyunjin to those in the know) and could go running right back to him as soon as he was done here. All you had was a too-warm apartment to stew in until whatever hour or day Sungbin would choose to actually, officially do the asking.  

“Come on, then,” Taehyung said, with a shrug, and nudged you with his foot. “How the fuck did you see San again?” 

Shit, that too.  

“Right, well, you know I was out with Sungbin last night—and, by the way, do NOT let me forget to show you his instagram. Oh my god. There are no words. And there’s also something else I need to tell you about him after this. But, yes, San, ok.” 

It felt like trying to describe a blur. You still didn’t know how you felt about it. The whole night felt surreal to you now, like a dream. It was frustrating to have met him but not really met him, to have seen him and not been able to talk. Everything that you had been working through—trying to work through—felt bundled up inside you and you wanted him to know. You didn’t need him to think you were dating again, you didn’t need to ‘win’; you needed him to know that you understood. That maybe there would always be some kind of thing between you—history, old intimacies like ink stains in your skin—but it didn’t mean that that past would hold you back forever. You wanted him to see that you understood that. 

But you came to those conclusions this morning, after a deep sleep, after another man had made implicit promises to ask you out. And, once he’d actually asked you, would anything you had to say to San matter anymore? Did it really matter now?  

“I don’t know how I feel about it because... I had this blind panic, y’know? But I don’t know why I panicked because San is a good person and I understand why he broke up with me and I don’t blame him for that and there really shouldn’t have been any reason for it to be awkward, right?” 

“I mean, another man pretending to be your boyfriend might make it a little awkward.” 

“Maybe... But that’s not Sungbin’s fault; he was trying to help. I thought I’d be cool seeing him again, because I’ve thought so much about things I want to say to him or would say if I could, but when he was actually in front of me, it was like I couldn’t think at all. I don’t know what that means.” 

“It doesn’t have to mean anything. You were surprised.” 

“Yeah, but shouldn’t I be over him? Should he have that effect on me even now?” 

“I don’t think ‘should’ is a helpful word here, sugarplum. There is no should or shouldn’t about feelings; isn’t that therapy 101?” 

“I just don’t know... I guess I thought that seeing him again would make everything crystal clear, written in stone. Sure. But... Well—ok, the other thing is that Sungbin kind of asked me out.” 

“On a date?” 

“Yeah.” 

“What did you say?” 

“Well, he asked me if it would be alright if he asked me out. And I said yes. So he said he would. But he hasn’t actually asked me yet.” 

“And you want to know if you should go out with him or not?” 

“I guess?”  

You shrugged. You wanted to go out with Sungbin. You knew you wanted to because you could picture his smiling face and bulging biceps and you saw clearly, outside of the moment, how quickly and easily he stepped in to support you, no questions asked and no favours owed. He wanted to date you. You knew you wanted to date him. But- 

“I don’t want it to be a mistake,” you said.  

“That’s natural. No one likes making mistakes.” 

“No, I mean, I don’t want it to be a mistake for Sungbin.” 

“Why would it be?” 

You looked at him, trying to say, without saying, what you meant. Because it had been for San—you had been. He was better off without you and maybe Sungbin would be, too. He was young and rich and free; he had just moved to the biggest city in the country; he had the world at his feet. Were you really going to let him limit himself, stop himself at your door?  

Taehyung looked cross for a moment, lips pursed and eyebrows drawn, then he took a sip of his coffee (mostly iced water at this point) and, when he turned back to you, his gaze was softer.  

“Baby,” he cooed and he held his arms out to you. Despite the heat in your poorly air-conditioned apartment, you climbed into his lap and let him stroke your hair. “There’s only one way to know for sure if something’s a mistake and that’s to do it. Sungbin clearly wants to. If you also want to, then you’re just going to have to dive in. The water’s great.” 

You nodded and let him hold you, so grateful to him and all his tact and diplomacy and gentleness. He wasn’t always—or often—gentle with you, because usually that’s not what you needed and he knew it. Just like he knew that today, that was what you needed. 

“I do have one question, though,” he said and his hesitance made your stomach drop. 

“Ok.” 

“Where does Yoongi fit in with all of this?” 

“What do you mean?” 

“Well, I don’t know; I thought you guys were-” 

“-Friends! Just friends! Have I not said it a million times?! We’re just friends! We’ve always just been friends!” 

“But you did have sex-” 

“ONE TIME!” 

You pushed away from him to better display your indignation and displeasure. Taehyung had a bee in his bonnet about Yoongi—had done since you’d first mentioned him—even though he didn’t know the guy, didn’t know anything. 

“Ok, ok!” He held his hands up in defeat. “I just sort of figured you guys were heading in that direction.” 

“Why?” 

“You seem to like him a lot.” 

“I do. Because we’re friends. I like you a lot, too, and we’re not going to shack up.” 

“Yes, love, but I’m gay and you are not a man.” 

You pushed him. 

“You know what I mean!” 

“I take your point. If you want to date Sungbin and feel good about it, then you have my blessing-” 

“I don’t need your blessing, Teddy; I can do what I like!” 

He fixed his eyes on you and simply waited you out. 

“Ok, fine!” you cried, exasperated, after probably not more than five seconds. “Thank you, yes, I did want your approval.” 

“And you have it, my sweet. As long as you’re happy and not being a complete idiot, I’m on board.” 

“I mean... Thanks, I guess?” 

"Don’t mention it.” 

“Babe!” you cried as soon as Yoongi step foot inside the classroom the following Thursday. You beckoned him closer, telling him to hurry, and grabbed him by the arm as soon as he was within reach. “I have so much to tell you.” 

He looked surprised, blinked, and then shrugged with a slight nod of his head. You didn’t pause for thought as you unloaded both your bags and your gossip onto the counter. You were sieving flour as you told him about your dinner with Mei; beating eggs into the mixture when you told him about drinks with Sungbin; and watching Yoongi almost drop the entire thing as he placed it in the oven when you mentioned San. 

“What was that like?” he asked with genuine, but guarded, curiosity.  

“A blur. Kind of a panicked mess but also fine. I sort of want a do-over but mostly for my pride, y’know? It was bumping into an ex, not actually meeting up with them so I think that made it better. But also worse because I had no time to prepare but there was also no opportunity to get into the difficult stuff which meant we didn’t have to get into it.” 

“Do you still want to do that? Talk to him?” 

“There’s a lot I want to say to him, but they are things I want to say more than things I think he would need or want to hear. If we met, it would be for my benefit and I don’t know if he deserves to be pulled in for that. Do you know what I mean?” 

He looked thoughtful for a moment and nodded.  

“And that was before Sungbin asked me out, too, so maybe I would be saying something different if that hadn’t happened.” 

“He asked you out?” 

Yoongi was turning towards his counter, looking at his sugar in his pan, turning on the hob, his head inclined just slightly towards you to indicate that he was listening. He needlessly pushed a hand through his hair which, far from tucking it behind his ear, made it fall in front of his face. You were, likewise, distracted by your sugar syrup and altogether too excited to take note of much else. 

“Yes!” you cried in answer. “So, on the Saturday he asked if he could and, obviously, I said yes. Then it took him until Wednesday to actually do the damn thing, but yes, he asked me out and I said yes and we’re going out tomorrow for our first actual date.” 

“Wow.” 

“I know, right? I had no idea it was coming—the bit where he asked if he could ask me out, I mean. We ran into my ex at drinks! And he asked me out?! And I was... I was discombobulated, you might say; I stood at his door for five minutes just in shock at what had happened. I was in disbelief. Especially because I wasn’t expecting it! At all. I mean, I was just doing Mei a favour! I didn’t think anything of it and now I can’t stop thinking about it! Or, well, him. I had forgotten how exciting this part is? It’s terrifying, yeah, completely horrifying, really, but I also just feel like I’m alive, y’know?” 

You paused briefly, glancing at the oven timer and stirring your syrup.  

“I just...” you started and then stopped, staring off into space to let the thought coalesce in your brain. “It’s so crazy that you can think one thing and then someone comes into your life and, suddenly, everything is so different. All it takes is one person to—ok, this is dramatic but you know me now so you’re going to have to let me be—change your whole life. A chance encounter? And suddenly I’m not the world’s loneliest, bitterest, most miserable single person alive? Suddenly, I have something to be excited about? To look forward to? I’m getting ahead of myself, I know I am, but I’m allowing it. I’m allowed to indulge in this because it’s been so long. I’ve been miserable for ages now. And I’m finally not. Don’t get me wrong when I say this, because therapy works, or at least it helps, it really does, but man, having a crush on someone is fucking electric, right? Years of counselling and it turns out nothing makes you feel the joy of being alive like when you really fucking like someone.” 

Yoongi hummed. 

Chapter Three | Masterlist | Chapter Five

[pomnipup]

perhaps an unpopular thought but thinking about putting makima csm in the babypile currently . i think it would be fun … i need more chainsaw man agere moots… pls find this post and come yap to me about her or any csm agere pretty pleeeeaaasse. :3

[eyrieofsynapses]

First Thoughts on YJ S4 Panel

WARNING: SPOILERS for the DC Fandome YJ S4 panel!

Okay, before I start chattering away, can I just saw how much I love this title poster? Because I love it. LOOK AT IT. LOOK AT HOW BADASS IT IS. 

Warning: this first bit is a teeny bit ranty, but that doesn’t mean I didn’t genuinely love the panel. It was really fun, but I have a few gripes with the amount of information we got. If you wanna cut straight to the cheery bits, check under the cut.

So... uh. I’m not gonna say I’m disappointed? Because I’m not, this was good, we got info, it was nice to see the voice actors. But I’m... underwhelmed. I definitely wasn’t expecting a lot but this was still, mm, not as much as I thought we’d get. No poster, no previews of character designs, not a peep as to when we’re getting the new season, nothing on where it’ll be streaming, nothing as to new characters, nothing as to who’s going to be the villain, and the Q&A session was maaaayyybe 3 minutes long. Oof, guys. Thought you said you’d leave us with something that’d leave us “more than just ‘whelmed.’” 

Essentially all we got was the title, and a few snippets of information regarding what the current status of the Team and its characters is. They didn’t really get the chance to talk to us at all about the actual season, either- I think Brandon spoke maaaybe three or four times? He got the title reveal, but, well, we knew that already, not that it’s their fault, but still. I love hearing the voice actors chat about their experiences and we got none of that, so that was disappointing. I’m wondering if there wasn’t some material cut, actually, because I distinctly recall seeing a clip on Twitter with Phil Lamarr talking about what it was like returning to the show, and it wasn’t in this. So what’s the deal, DC? Short-changing us on YJ again? When are we gonna get some actual news? 

There is the little problem that their big reveal of the title was spoiled, oh, maybe three or four months ago, and that isn’t their fault, but it does make that revelation more of an “okay, well, glad that’s confirmed” rather than an “OH MY GODS IT’S PHANTOMS WHAAAAAAAT” like I think they were hoping. Still, that’s definitely exciting to hear, and the new title poster looks cool. 

I got a “WHAT!!!” moment maaayybe three times, which is significantly less than I thought I would. There just wasn’t that much new info. But I think that’s less of a Grandon/production team problem and more of a world state and DC problem. I’m not annoyed at them, I’m annoyed at DC and at the pandemic, because I’m willing to bet their snippet was cut short by DC and what information they could’ve revealed just isn’t ready yet because of current events. Probably we would’ve gotten character designs if it weren’t for that.

As for the audio play, it was pretty good. They were definitely struggling what with having a distinct lack of people to pull from for a voice cast, but made some tongue-in-cheek references to it to take off the edge. I don’t think I realized just how many people voice for YJ until now... or how many characters each actor does. It’s a bit janky, and weird what with the arguing over who’s narrating the story (why, are they telling us the story, or are they telling it to someone else? Are you breaking the fourth wall, are you not? Make yourselves clear) but I’m blaming that on the fact that they’re more used to scripts than they are audio plays. These are different mediums, so there’s an inherent gap there; this probably would’ve gone better as an actual episode. 

So, FIRST watch-through, here’s my HAPPY cheery thoughts and reactions, in no particular order! I might do a second one later, we’ll see. (Under the cut, because it’s long.)

Return of Bowhunter Security! 

Clipboard makes a comeback!

The Supermartian marriage has taken place and they’re making reference to taking a long journey with Conner, M’gann, Bioship, Gar and J’onn. So... Mars? Do we finally get to see Mars?  

Forager gets to be sassy! And a hilarious narrator! Which, c’mon, it’s Jason Spisak, honestly, I don’t know what I expected.

Ahahah, Jason makes the most delightful faces when he’s voicing Forager. (And a few flubs, but he’s good at covering them.) We all miss Wally, but man, he does a good job with this character. Also, hey, that’s how he does the clicks!

Rocket! Even though she had a relatively minimal presence, sigh. I’m hoping they build her character more this time, she always get short-changed. 

ARTEMIS IS LEADING THE TEAM, repeat, ARTEMIS IS LEADING THE TEAM!!! YES!!! 

And she also makes a reference at some point to being in this fight for ten years, which, HMM, do I hear a reference point for our time jump? They started back in 2010, so this implies that the season’s caught up to 2020. So... season one was 2010, season two was 2016, season three was... 2018, I think? So does this make the next time jump two years too, or am I off? It also takes place on February 23rd. Eh, either way, it’s absolutely not as long as a lot of people were fearing- heck, I’m thinking this might be the shortest jump yet. Yay!

I’m not sure if the Snapper Carr dialogue is cringy or hilarious. I’m going with hilarious because I’m betting this would’ve been great if it were animated. It definitely loses something without the animation. 

Is... is Crispin Freeman playing four characters? Five? Will, Roy, Jim, Captain Boomerang... I think I’m missing someone, I’m gonna have to go back and rewatch this later, but wow. He switches between them so fluidly, too, that’s impressive.

Forget Freeman for a hot second, Nolan North, what are you doing, dude? Conner, Clayface, Mallah, at least one or two others, with a LOT of animal noises included... wow, okay. I definitely didn’t realize how many of these guys do two or three characters. 

Phil Lamarr doing Brick, Black Manta and Kaldur all at once is definitely impressive. I’m gonna take a guess and say he likes doing Brick best. He seems to get a little grin sometimes when he’s playing the character.

Ahhh, Danica McKellar definitely likes playing Terrence Terror. Don’t ask me why, I’m just getting that feeling watching her. Villains are fun to play.

...Wolf? Where’s Wolf? Uhh, guys? Where’s our fluffy doggo? Don’t tell anyone but I’m scared. 

Oooookay, that was unexpectedly gruesome. Dehydrating a man into sand? I mean, okay, it’s Clayface, but we didn’t know that till later. Eeeewww. Y’all, ik you’re going more dark, but that wasn’t an image anyone needed.

Jokes about Dadbod!Will are... hhh, cringy or funny, cringy or funny... I’m going sorta funny for now. Not enough to make me laugh, but enough to make me smile. 

Okay, Will’s definitely still hilarious. Literally that entire scenario with Captain Boomerang was amazing, and only made better by the fact that it was entirely Crispin Freeman. The “are you the Green Arrow fanclub president or something?” “...you have no idea” moment, the “boomerangs are better and Batman said so!” “...okay, FINE,” FLINGING CLIPBOARD, Boomerang teasing Will for his dadbod and Will answering with a wicked uppercut... ah, man. This is 100% Roy/Will Harper and I am here for it. 

I can see some people disliking this humor, but personally, I’m gonna just sit back and enjoy it. YJ has some quirky humor, but honestly, if you’re part of the fandom and you don’t like it, why are you even here?

Huh, Raquel’s a vegan and nobody’s making jokes about vegan burgers? Nice!

Oh, my gods, Forager deciding that Lian and Amistad playing with the food is an educational activity is AMAZING, 100% in character, and something I really, really want to see. 

(Fanartists? Fanartists, pleeeeaaasse?)

Will and Artemis ribbing each other will never get old.

...wait. Hang on. Is Will the comedic relief character now along with Forager? Is this a thing? I guess it is. If you’d asked me who out of the original Team would replace Wally as the comedic relief back when I had finished the second season, I would not have thought of him first, but I think I’m good with this. It’s definitely in character to his comic version. 

Ahh, Conner and M’gann’s relationship is still... interesting. Still not sure how to feel on this one. But hey, they’re married (?) now? Uh... nice? 

Nightwing’s off on some mysterious mission, hmm? I’m assuming that’s because of Jesse McCartney not being there, but I think I’m gonna headcanon that there are Other reasons for this. 

Yay, Clayface getting redemption! I love this in the Rebirth Batman: Detective Comics, so I’m 100% down for seeing it here. 

Tim did that for Clayface! Sweet! Not a plot thread I expected to go anywhere from that one season three episode, but one I am very happy to see used. 

...more secrets. Uhh, M’gann keeping secrets from Conner is... icky... again... but granted, keeping them because of confidentiality agreements is, well, a better excuse than she’s had in the past. Still, this is getting old.

Huh, so Waller will let out the Team’s secrets if they tell anyone about Belle Reve. I think this was already covered in the third season, but maybe not so explicitly. The reactions... hmm. Of course Conner’s okay with letting out all their secrets (and M’gann’s willing to... go along with that? ...okay...?), but the others, maybe not so much? Hmm. I wonder what Dick would have to say about that one. He definitely has something to lose. Not sure about Kaldur or Artemis, though. 

Jason did NOT get to make any Wally references. That makes me even sadder than if he did make one that made all of us cry. C’mon, guys. Let him have his references. 

I’m always a little meh on M’gann, but hey, M’gann gets to be a 100% certified badass! Saving Clayface AND taking down a ton of baddies with telekinesis, yay!

Oh, my gods. LOOPHOLES. WHAT IS WITH THIS TEAM AND LOOPHOLES. I love them so much.

The Team signing on as Bowhunter Security- oh my gods, all of the Team in fucking Bowhunter Security uniforms- oh my gods, so very in-character, so very true to YJ, so absolutely goddamn hilarious, I wanna hug whoever came up with that. That is the BEST mental image and it is a CRIME that they didn’t animate that. 

And, of course, Kaldur just immediately goes along with it. The Team’s corrupted him fully now. I mean, we knew that, but he’s done now. 

Black Manta attempting to roast Kaldur for his security uniform and Kaldur roasting him back 100 times worse is wonderful. “I wear my dignity on the inside, Father. Where do you wear yours?” KALLIE I LOVE YOU 

Ooooo, Artemis is inviting Roy to the Team? This should be interesting. He’s definitely not totally stable, but it seems to me that Artemis should be able to more or less keep him in check. Hopefully. She had to deal with Wally for five years, surely she can keep Roy in check?

...hmm. We’re all thinking there’s gonna be a Red Hood arc... Roy’s joining the team... Roy and Jason did have that run as the Outlaws in the comics with Kory... and this version of Roy has the sort of temper and attitude that I can just see Jason possibly getting along well with... hmmmmmmmm... 

Hah, villain shenanigans. Having Task Force X argue all the time is in character and admittedly sort of funny, especially as Black Manta’s sort of pulling a Kaldur and playing the absolutely exasperated denmother. I dislike BM thanks to him being a Baddie and all, but watching (listening to?) him struggle to contain them is enjoyable if only because I like watching him suffer. 

Ahh, watching the VAs is fun. It’s definitely nice to see that little view behind the camera. There’s the little smiles, the tiny grimaces at the icky bits, the responses to various bits, the way their demeanor changes with each character, everyone egging Nolan on when he’s yelling for Clayface being disintegrated... I’m sad we didn’t get to see them chat, but watching them interact while they work is fun. Pity Jason and Stephanie didn’t really have any interactions, though, I bet watching them work together would’ve been fun. Ah well. Still fun overall.

There’s a lot of variation in where they are/what setups they have. Some of them seem to have proper studios, some of them don’t but they have mics, Danica’s on the lower bunk of her son’s room with what I’m betting are several sheets hung behind her, and then... well, then there’s poor Stephanie with earbuds and what I’m betting is her phone at her friend’s house XD Also, Greg’s library is really awesome, can I steal it please?

Green title card... I know people have been positing this for a while, but Lazarus Pit? Also, the thing people haven’t talked about: Mars?! Is this a nod to the Martians, since M’gann, Conner, Gar and J’onn seem to be going there? 

Lots of speculation regarding Phantoms, but that’s been going around for a while, so *shrug* I’m not gonna spend any time on that for now.

Someone’s gonna have to write this out, methinks, for further examination. We’ll see if I get around to doing that or not before Fandome ends. I’m betting someone will record it and post it on YouTube, but a written-out version of the script would be useful. If I do, I’ll probably post it, so keep an eye out. 

So... season 3.9, episode 1? Hmm. Does this come directly prior to the fourth season? I kinda wanna say it does.

I have more thoughts, but I think I need to do a rewatch first, maybe in a little bit. Anyway... not what I was expecting, I sincerely miss Dick and Wally, but lots of funny jokes all the same, and lots of interesting information on the fourth season even if it’s nowhere near the amount we wanted. I might be underwhelmed but I’m certainly not disappointed. 

[flower-of-the-desert]

Thoughts on My Engineer ep14

Well, now I just feel clowned by this show. But in a good way. Which is a very nice feeling. I was so sure at least one of the couples would end on bad turns but instead they gave us the perfect set up for everyone is s02. That’s very sexy of them tbh. So going by the couples again:

1) Mek/Boss - ok ok they’re pretty damn cute; I loved Boss’s public confession and Mek getting flustered and most of all the way the scene went with Boss and Fon - I’m glad Boss was finally honest about his feelings making everything clear (I’m still a tiny bit annoyed with him for leading Fon on when he knew he had feelings for someone else) and that Fon accepted it and they parted ways on good terms.

2) Thara/Frong - poor Frong got brother-zoned so bad but that’s one of the things I’m looking forward to in the next season - seeing how Thara is going to go from lol, we’re just brothers! to having more romantic feelings and how Frong will deal with the initial rejection.

3) Bohn/Duen - sigh, I knew they were going to end things like this and sadly, it just... it doesnt make sense? I dont understand why Bohn didnt just TELL Duen that what he saw wasnt true and that he didnt kiss Mind willingly. Instead they made the whole argument about Bohn hiding the truth but didnt address the fact that Duen misunderstood what he saw. This changes the whole perspective because it makes it seem like Bohn cheated and that’s not what happened AT ALL. I just... dont understand why this turned out the way it did. Even the ending scene, as cute as it was, would have been so much BETTER if they had handled Duen’s skinship problem in a normal logical way - have Duen just TELL Bohn that he’s not comfortable with kissing and touching yet and he wants to take things slowly.

4) RamKing - what’s that noise, you ask? Oh, it’s just my SCREAMING at the top of my lungs over that RamKing scene. It’s no secret that they’re my favourites and this scene just about made me lose every bit of marbles I had at the moment. LOVE IT. King finally breaking down and confessing, saying how hard it is to control himself around Ram (hmmm, I’m gonna need 765847567 fics on that pleeeeaaasse 🙏🙏🙏) and how it tortures him that Ram makes him feel so good and he cant do anything about it. And THEN that KISS 🔥🔥 the desperation with which King grabbed him and then Ram kissing back like that I’m just 👀👀👀 I’m gonna need s02 ASAP and to give me MORE OF THAT.

Also can we talk about the fact that they’re still living together???? They’re gonna be spending all that time together at their home with their plants and dogs and and

I’m not ok, Send help.

[missatlantaanddarthraydor]

Brace Yourself

*moved here from my ff.net account. Enjoy!*

As Brenda looked out at the ocean she noticed the little yellow boat about to take off. She saw the little blonde speck in the water, that was Rusty's head, bobbing up and down. He gave the okay and the boat took off. Brenda heard his yell as he was yanked into the sky by the wind filling the para-sail.

She hated this, just sitting here. She'd be right there with him if it weren't for this stupid knee brace. She'd had to get one after helping Julio tackle a suspect that tried to run. She couldn't remember why she'd done it. She usually had the boys do the tracking down and/ or tackling, but this felt like instinct. She'd just done it no questions asked. At least she hadn't used her taser.

Sharon was already mad as it is. Well more concerned than anything but it translated as mad. But Brenda knew the difference. Knew that she'd scared Sharon to death when Andy had called her and told her that Brenda was in the hospital. Sharon hadn't waited to hear the story or hear that Brenda was fine and had just strained her knee. Sharon drove straight there while maintaining as many traffic laws as she could. She had burst into the room took one look at Brenda and proceeded to read her the riot act about how what she'd done was dangerous and unethical. "He was three times your size, Brenda Leigh. You're lucky it was just your knee." Brenda could have teased but she kept her mouth shut.

She knew Sharon. She knew that if you were lucky enough to be someone that Sharon cares about that you were not immune to the mothering or the worrying, no matter how well Sharon concealed it (or thought that she did).

Brenda was allowed to leave after the doctors braced her knee with instructions to stay off it for the week, but Sharon was not letting her off so easily. "It's just my knee, honey. And nothing was broken, I just have to be careful with it." Brenda said exasperated. "Nope, either I'm going to be staying with you or you with me, but I will not let you go unsupervised. You would take that brace off as soon as you got home, and then drive to work." Sharon wasn't wrong. Brenda didn't feel like arguing and she wouldn't have won if she'd tried.

So she let Sharon drive her home, she'd packed a bag, and proceeded to spend the week with Sharon and rusty. Rusty thought it was great. He was on break so he had free time. Plus being at UCLA had cut into how much he saw Brenda and his mother, so he was glad. They had movie marathons while Sharon was working, and game nights full of trivia and competition when she wasn't.

So now a week later Brenda found herself on the beach, watching rusty fly through the air like a crazy person, and wondering just where her pretty warden went. "I got you a smoothie. Strawberry and banana" said Sharon from just behind her. She handed Brenda the smoothie and then used Brenda's knee as leverage to sit beside her. Brenda took a sip and then smiled at her "You know me so well. Thank you." Sharon kissed her cheek and then looked out over the water. "Please tell me he's not the one yelling his head off." Sharon said after spotting some parasailers along the horizon. "The very one. He's got some pipes on him too. Kevin said he put a spider in Rusty's backpack one time, and Rusty screamed bloody murder." Brenda said through a grin. Sharon grimaced "I don't blame him."

Brenda adjusted her position on the blanket then pouted. Some sand had decided to get stuck between her leg and the brace around her knee. Great. That was gonna bug her all afternoon. "Can I pleeEEAaasse take this thing off now." She begged Sharon. "No." "But the week is over! And I'm not standing on it." "Will you put it back on when you do?" Sharon asked, already knowing the answer. In an attempt to be honest and get her way Brenda replies "MaaAYbe.." "No." "Oh Shari PLEASE!" Brenda puts on her best pout, with the big eyes and everything. Sharon can't resist laughing a bit, she leans in to kiss the pout away.

When she pulls back she asks "Well have you learned your lesson?" This question feels like a set up to Brenda. She hears Admiral Ackbar in the back of her mind "It's a trap!" But she can't figure it out. What lesson was she supposed to have learned? "Uh..to let my boys do the tackling from now on..?" Sharon smiles slightly "It's a start, but no. Guess again." The way Sharon is looking at her reminds Brenda of when her mother used to ask her a question with a very obvious answer. But Brenda had no idea wha- yes she did. Of course, it was obvious. "I can't learn that lesson Shari. I can't promise it won't happen again. Plus it's kinda in your nature." Sharon nodded "Smart girl. But please try." Brenda grabbed Sharon's hand and squeezed "I promise to try, to the best of my ability, not to scare you again." Sharon kissed her sweetly. They broke apart, and Brenda laughed, when they heard rusty let out an excited yet terrified scream as he plummeted back into the water.

[maskedmuses-archived]

A young girl, prpbably around the age of 14 with blonde hair and blue eyes ran up to Marinette, a look of wonder dominating her familiar features. "Your Marinette, aren't you!? Ahhh-- your every bit as pretty as dad said you were!" She appeared to be utterly giddy. "Hey hey, he told me stories about how you loved fashion and baking and how you were super talented-- can you show me some of the stuff you've made? Pleeeeaaasse???" Appears both father and daughter had good kitten eyes to beg with.

Go on anon and talk to my muse as their child || Still accepting

@cattusnoir

Ladybug had died. 

It was the title of the news stories that flooded the internet on the day that the heroine had fallen and never again were the red and black to grace the sky once more. Everything that had come before, the defeat of Hawkmoth, the salvation of Paris, the marriage of Ladybug and Chat Noir, all of the positives that had rallied the city in the years seemed to quake and fall away at the news. 

Times had changed, people had almost forgotten the heroine that traversed the rooftops with her partner. But, forgetting was the problem. Ladybug had not died that night, but instead fell into a coma. The bump on her head that almost did send her to the grave was enough to make her retire from her life as a hero and enter a world of sleep. Sent to a ward in Italy, it was effectively the end of her life in Paris.

And as a mother. 

The child that ran up to the woman now, who had returned to Paris not long before to finish her long road to recovery, startled her as she sipped her coffee, the fragments of her mind now lost as she tried to piece things together. She was a designer. She was a wife–to whom, that part she wasn’t certain of–but she was a daughter to a baker. 

At least, in the time she had awoken, she had begun designing again. Designing and selling her works. It was the only healthy coping mechanism she could come with. 

This girl was very familiar, the bouncing blonde hair, the bright eyes, a shade of blue, but still, wide and pleading with her. “O-oh?” She manage out, startled that someone had recognized her. These days, she hardly recognized herself. “Your father sounds like someone I must have been very close to…” She murmured, realizing perhaps this girl knew more about her than she herself did. 

Scooting back some, she offered the seat across from her at the table outside of the cafe. “Please, sit with me.” Marinette’s voice was friendly, the woman pulling out her phone. “I have some of my latest designs on here, but you can’t tell anyone. They’re going to be on the Milan runway in a few weeks.” She gave a gentle wink, the small parts of her head beginning to throb as she stared more at this girl. 

Because it was the reason she had stayed in Italy so long: Every time she tried to remember her past, it would cause her damaged mind to burn, reverting her slowly back to her comatose state into something worse. 

Marinette ignored it, this the first she had seen of anyone who knew her in almost fourteen years. 

“Tell me, do you like fashion, Miss…?”

[i-am-a-closet-fanfic-fiend]

25 Fics of Christmas ~ Day 10

A/N: So this was supposed to be Monday’s post and it was supposed to be short and fun and then it took on an absolute life of its own. So I apologize for the delay and I hope you enjoy it. 

Title Holiday Back Up 

Summary: Bucky accompanies you home for Christmas to keep you from hooking up with your asshole ex who your mom still thinks is your perfect match. Neither of you realize that the other one has feelings. 

Characters/Pairings: Bucky x Reader, OC’s

Rating: T for language 

Warnings: Angst ( more than usual), but it’s still pretty fluffy 

Word count: 4858 (it’s a beast) 

“You will be home in time for the Christmas party, won’t you, dear?”

You sighed into the phone as you walked away from the training room.

“Yes, mom. I’ll be home in time for the party.”

“Oh good. I know Tom is very excited to see you.” You were about to remind her that you and Tom had barely spoken in five years when there was a loud commotion in the background. “Is everything okay?”

“Oh yes. Your father and brother just brought the tree in. I have to go. Text us when you get on the plane. Love you.”

“Love you too,” you muttered after she had already hung up.

Great. Another year of your mother trying to get you back together with your asshole ex. Merry freaking Christmas. As you stormed back into the training room, you tossed your phone in the direction of your bag and headed straight for the punching bag. You ignored the curious glances from your team as you landed blow after blow, bloodying your knuckles in the process.

“You okay there, doll?” he asked from behind you.

“I’m fine, Buck. Leave me alone.”

You knew he wasn’t going to leave you alone, so you weren’t surprised when he rested a hand on your shoulder to stop you.

“You’re staining the canvas. Come on. At least let me tape you up properly.”

His prolonged contact was draining the fight right out of you so with a sigh you let him lead you over to a bench. Grabbing a towel from a nearby cart, he crouched in front of you, cradling your hand in his as he dabbed the blood away. When he pulled a roll of tape from his pocket you shook your head.

“Don’t bother. I think I’m done for today.”

“Do you want to talk about it, doll?” he asked as he looked up at you. He still had one of your hands trapped between his.

“If I say no will you let it drop?” you asked, already knowing the answer.

“For now,” he agreed. “But you know I’ll find out eventually. Come on, doll. I’m your best friend. You can talk to me about anything.”

“My mom called,” You sighed and started gathering your stuff.  

“Oh, goodie. What did she want?”

He fell in step beside you as you headed back to your room.

“She wanted to make sure that I would be home in time for the holiday party.”

“That doesn’t explain why you were trying to demolish the punching bag.”

“She’s going to spend the entire night trying to get me back together with my ex.”

He made himself comfortable on your couch while you started getting your things together for a shower.

“When did you guys break up? I didn’t know you’d been with anybody.”

“Five years ago Christmas Eve. Long before I joined the team.”

Long before you met Bucky.

“Why is your mom still so hung up on him?”

“Because to her he’s my perfect match. I didn’t have the heart to tell her what he did.”

“What did he do, doll?”

He was watching you carefully, measuring your response.

“He cheated on me throughout our entire relationship.”

“Please tell me you punched him in the face.”  

“No, I didn’t. And unfortunately I don’t think I’m as over him as I should be.”

“Why do you say that?”

“Because out of the four Christmas parties since we broke up, we’ve hooked up during three of them,” you admitted, feeling ashamed. “Have I mentioned my mom’s eggnog is really strong?”

“Which year didn’t you hook up?” The question seemed to pain him.

“Last year.”

“Then maybe you just needed time. You’re probably over him.”  

“I wish that were true. But it was mainly because you were en route to pick me up for a mission during the last Christmas party.”

“Well apparently I have great timing.”

“Well maybe you’ll have to come get me again this year.”  

“Or I could just go with you and beat the shit out of this guy,” he offered.

That got your brain whirring.

“Maybe you should.”

“What? Since when do you let anyone fight your battles?”

You shook your head.

“No. No. I don’t need you to beat him up. But you coming home with me isn’t the worst idea.”

“Doll…”

“Think about it, Buck. You have no plans for the holidays and you could keep me company. And save me from myself.”

“I don’t know, y/n.”

“Come on. Please. I’ll love you forever.”

He smirked. “But that’s already true.”

You didn’t dispute the claim.

“Pleeeeaaasse. You get awesome food out of the deal.”

“Alright, alright. I’ll do it. I never could resist a damsel in distress,” he teased.

“I’ll show you a damsel,” you growled playfully as you jumped at him.

He easily caught and pinned you under him on the couch.

“Gotcha.”

“Are you sure about that?”

You locked your knees around his waist and rolled him off the couch. You both landed with a thud and he groaned as you pinned his wrists down and pecked him on each cheek.

“Gotcha.”

“As always,” he smiled and you felt the butterflies in your stomach start cartwheeling.

You immediately hopped to your feet, hoping he didn’t catch your blush. He pushed himself into a sitting position as you headed for the bathroom to the shower.

“Are you just gonna leave me here?” he called as you started up the water.

“You could always join me,” you muttered under your breath before speaking more loudly. “You know where the remotes are. Entertain yourself.”

The next morning Clint flew you and Bucky to the closest airport to your hometown, where you switched over to an SUV sans SHIELD logo.

“So anything I should know going into this week, doll?” Bucky asked, gripping the steering wheel tightly – the way he did when he was nervous about a mission.

“Take your next right,” you instructed before answering his question. “Not really. I’ve told you about them.  My family is easier to experience than explain. They will probably ask if we’re dating, but don’t let that throw you. They just aren’t used to seeing me with anyone but Tom.”

“But you guys have been broken up for so long. I don’t get it.”

“Yeah. But we were together for a really long time.”

“How long?”

“Seven years.”

“Wow.”

“Yep. Junior year of high school through college and my first year interning at Stark Industries. I came home early for Christmas and found him in bed with another girl.”

“You deserve so much better, doll.” He reached out to hold your hand and you gladly took it.

“That wasn’t the worst part.”

His eyes darted from the road to your face.

”How is that not the worst part?”

“I went to my high school reunion that holiday and got told by 4 different girls that they had hooked up with him while we were dating.”

“Ouch,” he grimaced.

“I don’t even want to think about how many girls he was with in college.”

“What a loser. He had it all and just threw it all away.”

“He didn’t have it all,” you argued quietly.

He didn’t miss a beat.  

“He had you. That’s all that matters.”

You were surprised by the ferocity in his voice, and something about it made you blush.

“Take your next right,” you mumbled as he came to a stop sign.

“Wow. Your family really does love Christmas,” he smiled at the lights outside your house.

“My contribution to the traditions,” you told him proudly.

“Well they’re beautiful,” he looked over to smile at you, but noticed your preoccupation. “Are you okay, doll?”  

You were flipping your phone over and over in your hands, staring at the front door.

“Doll?” he spoke softly, putting a hand on your shoulder.

“Yeah. I’m good. Thanks for coming with me, Buck.”

“Wouldn’t miss it. Shall we go meet the family?”

“Let’s do it,” you sighed opening the door.  

He grabbed both your duffels from the trunk while you took the bags of presents.

“Knock. Knock. Your favorite daughter’s home!” you called when you walked through your door. “Jakie,” you beamed as you hugged your brother.

“You’re here! And you brought company.”

Bucky shifted your bag to his shoulder and extended his hand.

“I’m James Barnes. You can call me Bucky.”

You clocked the recognition in your brother’s eyes. And you were a bit nervous about how he was going to react. But he just smiled and shook his hand.

“Jake. Nice to meet you. You didn’t tell me you were bringing anyone, y/n.”

“Your sister was kind enough to invite me when my plans fell through.”

“Of course she was.”

He gave you a pointed look, and you knew you were going to be interrogated later.

Your mom rounded the corner speaking on the phone.

“Have to go, Carol. I’ll call you later, y/n just got home.”

Shoving the phone at Jake your mother hugged you tightly.

“Hi mom.”

“Hi, sweetheart. Who’s your friend?”

She let go of you, appraising Bucky carefully.

“James Barnes, ma’am. Pleasure to meet you. I hope I’m not intruding.”

He gave her his most charming smile and your stomach flipped. Jake elbowed you in the ribs with a smirk. You glared. Bucky’s manners did the trick because you could see your mother’s approval replacing her suspicion.

“Of course not. Any friend of y/n’s,” she waved her hand in lieu of completing the adage. “It’s lovely to have you here. You must be tired from your flight.”

“I was just about to get him settled in the guest room. And then I’ll be down to help get ready for the party.”

“Take your time. Everything’s under control. Besides Tom said he’d stop by and help out.”

“Of course he did,” you grumbled. “C’mon, Buck. I’ll show you your room.”

He nodded and followed you up the stairs.

“You are very charming, Sarge,” you admitted as you climbed to the second floor.

“You say that like you’re surprised.”

You shrugged. “I just rarely see it.”

“Just because you fell for me naturally….” He trailed off and you could feel your cheeks burning.

Luckily, you’d made it to the guest room.

“So, this is you. I’m right next door, and we’ll have to share a bathroom. Sorry.”

“Not like we haven’t done it before, doll. Remember that cabin in Canada?”

“You mean shack,” you corrected him with a giggle. “And yes, I do. That was a long week.”

“That was one hell of a first mission for us as partners.”

“It certainly made the rest of them easier. I should go help my mom. Take your time and settle in. I’ll see you in a bit.”

Despite your insistence that he rest, Bucky simply freshened up and followed you back downstairs. You found your mom in the kitchen dusting cookies with powdered sugar.

“Anything we can do to help, mom?”

“Those sugar cookies could use a little extra frosting.”

“We’re on it.”

You settled yourself at the kitchen island with the bowl of frosting and a plate of cookies between the two of you and got to work.

“So how long have you two been an item?”

The butter knife you had been using clattered to the counter and you choked on the cookie you had just bit into. Bucky was immediately on his feet patting you on the back and offering you a drink of water.

“Are you okay, doll?” he asked, rubbing your back soothingly as you continued to cough a little.

“I’m good. Thanks, Bucky.”

You smiled up at him and he squeezed your shoulders before picking the knife up and rinsing it in the sink. When you both had settled again your mother changed the subject.

“So, ‘Bucky’ that’s an interesting nickname.”

“Yes ma’am. A childhood one. My middle name is Buchanan.”

“James Buchanan Barnes, what an interesting… oh.” You saw the moment of recognition and Bucky squirmed next to you. You were about to intervene when your mother continued speaking.  “You’re Captain America’s best friend. Two good men. It’s an honor to meet you.”

Bucky slumped in relief next to you and you squeezed his knee under the island. You were grateful to your mother.

When the cookies were done, your mother asked Bucky to help move some chairs out of the garage, tasking you with setting up the refreshments table.

You huffed as your fingertips grazed the cinnamon on the top shelf, pushing it just out of your reach.

“Dammit,” you muttered.

You were about to turn around to grab the step stool when a taller body pressed against your back, easily grabbing the spice.

“Thanks, Bu… Tom?”

You stumbled over yourself trying to get away from him.

“Hey, y/n. Long time no see.”

“Ever heard of a doorbell?”

“Your mom said I should just come on in because she’d probably be busy. You look good.”

His eyes raked up and down your body and you resisted the urge to cringe. You silently hoped Bucky would make a surprise appearance.

“I need to go finish setting up the refreshments.”

“I’ll give you a hand.”

“No. Why don’t you go see what mom needs.”

He stalked towards you trapping you against the counter.  

“You know, y/n. I’ve missed you a lot.”

“Don’t, Tom.”

He leaned over you.

“Don’t what?”

“Don’t try to start this again. I’m done with you.”

Your voice wasn’t as strong as you would have liked it to be.

“Don’t be silly. You know you’ll always want me.”

You knew he was about to kiss you. And you knew you should shove him away but you were trapped. Your body refused to listen to your brain. Luckily, Bucky really does have impeccable timing.

“Hey, doll. Your mom wants you to help me set up the den. Apparently only you know how to fit the maximum amount of chairs.”

You and Tom both looked to the dining room doorway, where Bucky had just appeared. You could see the tension in his jaw as he took in your compromising position.

“Who the hell are you?” Tom snapped, and you used the distraction to scurry to Bucky’s side.

“James Buchanan Barnes,” he said clearly, wrapping an arm around your shoulders.

“You’re the… the… Win… the Winter Soldier,” he stuttered out.

Bucky’s gaze hardened into a glare.

“Yes. I am.”

“What the hell are you doing here?”

The plates in Bucky’s arm whirred against you as he made a fist.

“He’s with me,” you informed him. “Will you give me a hand with the eggnog before we do the den?”

Bucky’s expression immediately softened.

“Sure thing, doll.”

You handed him the giant punch bowl and grabbed the cinnamon and the reindeer shaker. Tom was shooting daggers at the both of you, but Bucky just offered him a feral grin.

When you were out of earshot you stretched to kiss him on the cheek.

“Thank you for saving me.”

“That is what I’m here for. I gotta be honest though, doll. I’m not sure I’m going to make it through the week without punching him in the face.”

“Try for me?” you pleaded, stroking his cheek.

“I’ll try. But I make no promises.”

“I’ll take it.”

“Y/n? Where are you?”

“In the dining room, dad.”

Bucky took a cautionary step back from you and you smirked at him. Your dad came through the swinging door with a grin.

“Hi honey. It’s so good to have you home.”

“Hi, dad.”

You hugged him tightly before gesturing to Bucky.

“Dad, this is Bucky. My teammate.”

He immediately stuck his hand out, formally introducing himself. “James Buchanan Barnes. It’s an honor to meet you, sir.”

“Nice to meet you. How was your drive from the airport?”

“Nice and easy. We barely hit any traffic at all.”

“Good. That’s good. Your mom was looking for you. She wants you to change the setting on the outdoor lights so they stay on all night.”

“Oh okay. I was going to help Bucky with the den.”

“I’ll give James a hand. It’ll give us a chance to get to know each other.” Your father told you pointedly. “You should probably do the lights and go get ready. Guests start arriving at five.”

“Five? Since when?”

“Since your mother decided to add a sing along portion to the evening.”

You chuckled and shook your head.

“I’m just going to go fix the lights.”

You shot Bucky an apologetic look as your father led him into the den. You owed him big time.

“Bucky?” You called as you put the finishing touches on your make up.

“Yeah, doll?” He appeared in your doorway via the adjoining bathroom.

“Can you help me with this zipper? It’s stuck.”

“Sure thing.”

You lifted your arm so he could reach the offending metal. He struggled for a moment before finally freeing it and pulling it all the way up.

“You look beautiful,” He smiled at your reflection in your full length mirror.

“Why thank you. Not so bad yourself. The waistcoat is a nice touch.”

You finished putting your earring and turned so you could straighten his tie.

“Kind of the style I’m used to.”

“It suits you. Pun intended,” you giggled, brushing some stray lint off his shoulder.

“You’re a nut.”

“And that’s the reason you love me.”

“Among others,” he mumbled, making you blush.

“So what did my father say to you? And how much do you hate me now?”

“I could never hate you, doll. And we just chatted. He asked what my intentions were towards you and how long we had been dating.”

“And what did you tell him?”

“I told him you were a great girl and I had unfortunately not yet worked up the courage to ask you out. However, if and when I did, my intentions would be to court you and love you in every way possible.”

“Bucky, what are you saying?”

“Y/n, I’m not sure how you feel about me, but I’m crazy about you. I’ve wanted to tell you for a long time, but I kept chickening out. But now… will you be my girl?”

You couldn’t find the words so you just nodded and launched yourself into his arms. He was leaning in for a kiss when there was a soft knock on your door just before Jake opened it and the two of you jumped apart.

“Jake!”

“Sorry. Sorry. I just wanted to talk to you before the party.”

“I’m going to go see if your mom needs any more help. See you downstairs, doll.”

He closed the door behind him and you turned to face your brother.

“Seriously?!”

“Sorry. But how could you not tell me you’re dating the Winter Soldier? That’s so cool.”

“Number one, don’t call him that. It’s a bit of a sore spot.” He nodded understandingly. “And number two, we aren’t dating. Well we weren’t dating. But we are now. But that’s a recent development.”  

“How recent?”

“Ten seconds before you opened the door.”

“If you weren’t dating then why’d you bring him? You’ve never brought teammates home before.”

“I brought him to run interference with Tom.”

“So you had Bucky Barnes pretending to be your boyfriend? Badass, sis.”

“Well now he’s not pretending anything. And now that I know Bucky likes me there’s no chance of Tom ruining anything,” you grinned.  

“Oh please let me be there when they meet.”

“Too late. Bucky already saved from him once.”

“How did that go?”

“No punches were thrown…”

“For now.”

“For now,” you agreed. “So what do you think of him?”

“You’re happy so I’m happy.”

You smiled at him affectionately.

“Thanks, little bro.”

“Plus he charmed mom and that’s not easy.”

“Speaking of. I should probably go save him from her.”

You slipped on your heels, squeezed him arm, and hurried down the stairs. Bucky looked up at your entrance and the smile he gave you made your heart skip. You felt like you were in a movie, at least until your toe caught on the rug three steps from the bottom. You didn’t have enough distance to flip out of the fall, so you braced for impact. Instead strong arms caught you and gently placed you on the ground.

“You alright, doll?”

“Perfect. That’s two times now.”

“No need to keep score, doll. I’ve always got your back.”

“Quick reflexes, James,” your father complimented him.

“All part of the job, sir.”

“It’s good to know my daughter has someone like you on her side.”

Guests started flooding into the house at five o’clock on the dot, and you spent the first couple of hours or so of the party introducing Bucky to your family and friends. Most of them had the same response, slight surprise and then awkward, polite conversation, at least until Bucky charmed them. All it took was a few minutes with him to see the witty, charismatic sweetheart you were used to. Tom however spent the first two hours glaring at you from afar.

When it was time for the sing-along, your mother sat you down at the piano and had everyone gather round. You were a little embarrassed when you caught Bucky grinning as you ran your fingers up and down the scales. Your musical talents weren’t typically of use in the field so not many people knew about them, but it had been something you shared with Bucky. The two of you would often hide out in the music room playing show tunes.  

You started off with the 12 Days of Christmas. It was a long one, but it always got people in the spirit. By the end of the song everyone was bellowing the lyrics in an off key cacophony. You segued into Jingle Bells which was another crowd favorite. After ten or twelve songs, Tom had perched himself on the stool next to you and you ignored him as you finished the playing Winter Wonderland.

“I think it’s time for a break,” your father announced, sensing your fatigue. “We’ll do another round in an hour.”

“You haven’t lost your touch.”

“Why don’t you two do a duet?” Your mother suggested. “Why don’t you sing Baby It’s Cold Outside like you used to.”

“I don’t think that’s the best idea, mom.”

“Don’t be a spoil sport, babe,” Tom whispered.

You looked up and saw Bucky’s jaw clench as he spoke to your oldest friends. Clearly he’d heard him.

“My voice isn’t up for it. I think I feel a cold coming on. Excuse me.”

You grabbed two glasses of punch from the table and headed over to Bucky, who sensed you coming and maneuvered so you could easily join the conversation.

“Punch?” you offered.

“Don’t mind if I do,” he responded with an edge in his voice and you knew what he was thinking. After all you wanted to punch Tom too.

You placed your hand on the small of his back, trying to calm him. He responded by immediately wrapping his arm around your shoulders. Conversation with your friends flowed easily and you soon dropped your head against Bucky’s shoulder.

When it was time for the next round of songs, you sent Jake to play and you stayed with Bucky, finding comfort in his low voice as he sang along to the classics. After that, your mother turned on the stereo system and couples took the floor to dance.

You spent a little longer mingling with friends before Bucky coaxed you out onto the dance floor, bopping along to the music somewhat awkwardly.

“You look embarrassed by my sweet moves, doll.”

“Not at all. I’m sure Sam would be proud,” you teased.

When the first slow song came on, Bucky pulled you close. You leaned your head against his chest and swayed. Everything was perfect until part way through the song, you felt his arms stiffen around you. Before you could ask him what was wrong, Tom spoke.

“Mind if I cut in?”

Bucky pulled away but didn’t release you. Tom was attempting to have a staring contest with the Winter Soldier, but he merely gestured to you.

“You’ll have to ask, y/n.”

“Y/n, babe, do you want to dance?”

Saying no to Tom went against your instincts, and Bucky knew that. You glanced at him and he squeezed your hand encouragingly. Taking a deep breath you turned back to your ex and smiled politely.

“No thanks, Tom.”

Bucky beamed as he pulled you close. Tom refused to take no for an answer and tapped Bucky on the shoulder.

“Look, pal. Just because you’re some assassin who she’s too afraid of to say no to doesn’t mean you can take advantage of her like that!” he shouted gaining the attention to the party.

“What are you talking about?” Bucky asked, genuinely confused.

“I saw that little look. She was going to say yes and then you scared her out of it.”

Bucky just laughed as you glared at your ex.

“Do I amuse the Winter Soldier? What’s so funny?”

“The fact that you actually think y/n is the least bit intimidated by me. You clearly know nothing about her.”

“I know her better than you think. I know that she can never say no to me. You clearly have her too scared to do anything but your bidding, you monster,” he spat.  

The insult hit Bucky hard and you watched as his face fell. You had been seeing red already but in that moment your fist snapped forward without warning and you heard the satisfying crack of his nose breaking.

“He’s not the monster, Tom.”

”You don’t see it. Do you? He’s got his claws in you. You always were so easy to manipulate. I cheated on you for years and you still stayed with me. Though it runs in the family. Hell your mom still wants you to marry me.”

His white shirt was now stained with blood as he stumbled to his feet.

“You what?!” your mother glared at Tom. “You cheated on my daughter and had the gall to show your face in my house. Get out.”

“Mrs. Y/l/n.”

“Get out, Thomas. You are not welcome here.”

“Fine. She’s not worth the trouble anyways.”

“Please everybody, enjoy the rest of the party,” your mother insisted graciously before steering you into the kitchen. “Y/n, sweetheart, why didn’t you tell me?”

“I was ashamed. It had been going on for so long and I didn’t realize until it slapped me in the face. You always told me he was the best thing to ever happen to me.”

“I was so wrong sweetheart. I’m so sorry I made you feel like you couldn’t tell me the truth. And I am so sorry I kept pushing you towards that…” she searched for the right word before finally settling on, “Douchebag.”  

You laughed at your prim and proper mother uttering such a term. She looked at you curiously for a moment before joining in your laughter. Bucky, Jake, and your father walked in just then and shared a look of confusion. You simply waved at them in a gesture clearly meaning don’t worry about it. That was when Bucky clocked the blood on your hand and snapped into protective mode.

He rushed over to the sink and wet a wash cloth.

“Bandages and antiseptic are above the microwave,” your dad told him when he figured out what he was doing.

Bucky nodded his appreciation and gathered the necessary items before sitting to your right and gently taking your hand. You had reopened the wounds from the punching bag.

“You know, doll. We talked about unnecessary punching when you’re still injured,” he quipped as he carefully dabbed at your knuckles, just like he’d done the day before.

“That was completely necessary punching.”

You hissed when he applied the antiseptic. Bucky shot you an apologetic look. You were vaguely aware your family had made themselves scarce.

“I’m not saying he didn’t deserve to be punched after what he did to you, but I could have done it for you.”

He finished wrapping the bandage around the gauze and pressed a gentle kiss to the wound.

“I didn’t punch him for me.”

“Then why did you…”

You reached out to cup his face.

“Because no one calls the most important person in my life a monster and gets away with it.”

Just the sound of the word made him cringe and he suddenly couldn’t meet your eyes.

“But I was a monster, for a long time.”

“No. You weren’t. You were used by monsters. There’s a big difference. And as long as I’m in your life, you will not be allowed to forget that at your core you are a good man, Bucky Barnes. A man that I love very much.”

The declaration surprised him and his blue eyes were wide when they met yours.

“I love you too, doll.”

You could feel yourself smile as you leaned in.

“Now, I believe our first kiss was interrupted. So how about we give it another shot?”

“I thought you’d never ask.”

A/n: So there you have it. The story that just started writing itself. I hope it was worth the wait lovelies. Thanks for reading! 

Tag Lists are Open! 

Bucky/Sebastian Tag List @waywardpumpkin @sadanddeadsoul @captain-maaarvel @kaytlinr @isaxhorror

Permanent Tag List @iamwarrenspeace @jayzayy @bexboo616 @neoqueen306 @santheweird @helgahuffelpuff @buckitybarnes

[natobeeyo-blog]

When?

This was just a fun little Arin blurb that I did on mobile a while back. I like it, because Arin is my BABY

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Egoraptor x Reader

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    “You fuckin’ got this, dude.” I tapped my chin with my fist as I looked in my rear view mirror. “All you’re doing is playing some video games, you don’t gotta be a little bitch about it! Toughen up, Princess.” It’s so ridiculous, but I have to actually give myself a pep talk before I see him. He’s such a nerd I don’t even know why I’m so intimidated. How could I POSSIBLY be afraid of a guy who collects Transformers? I finish beefing myself up in the mirror and sweep up my purse and keys as I shove out the door, causing it to bounce back and hit me in the knee. “Every fucking time.”

           Walking up the steps to the front door was nothing new, but it always filled me with anxiety, because that was when I would realize every time that I couldn’t turn back and just leave. Even though I didn’t want to leave – or I do? I don’t. I think. Maybe. My internal struggle always churned even after the billionth time I had walked those steps, turned that brass handle, and stepped across the wood floor into my best friend Arin’s house. We didn’t know each other since Kindergarten or anything, we just get along REALLY well. He is a few years older than me, but since I graduated high school it doesn’t really matter to anyone. We pretty much do everything together, he even went to my prom with me. People tell me all the time how they have never seen two people be so meant for each other, and they’re right. You could even say we’re like soulma-

           “YOOOOOOO!” His yell boomed through the house, making my ears immediately feel warm. A smile hit me immediately as he slid into the room in dirty white socks. His appearance is always appealing to me; always jeans, always a T-shirt, never shoes. His hair rested just past his shoulder, a perfect brown with a Caramello blonde streak down the right side. He’s just like a big teddy bear, the perfect big, soft man. “What’s up my OG? You ready to get DOWN?” He curled his arms down into a muscle man flex.

           “You know I’m always ready to get down, you don’t even gotta ask!” I threw my arms over my head and punched the air. A giant proud smile crept over his face, and I knew there was no way I was going to be prepared for what he was going to say.

           “Okay we’ve got two options. We can do the usual YouTube and Mario Kart…”

           “Uh huh…”

           “Or,”

           “Yes?”

           “We could – and HEAR ME OUT…….play Portal 2!!!” He jutted his arms out with the brand new game still wrapped in its plastic.

           “WHAT IT’S OUT I DIDN’T EVEN KNOW?!?”

           “I KNOW RIGHT I JUST GOT IT ON THE WAY HOME FROM WORK!!! But listen, I don’t expect you to like, love it, or anything. I just heard it’s amazing and the best game ever and it’s literally THE perfect game to play on a Saturday. If you hate it, I promise we can just go back to Mario! PLEEEEAAASSE Y/N???” It’s really hard to say no to him. He’s just so adorable.

           “ You don’t even have to TRY and convince me! I’m so excited to see Glados again, she’s such a sass ball.”

           “You’re a sass ball.” He vaulted over the back of the couch and almost landed on his face. A small laugh escaped me and I kicked my shoes at the door. I took my phone out of my purse, then chucked the purse at the door with my shoes. I never have anything important in there, it’s usually bobby pins and fast food receipts. I walked over to the soft, black couch and plopped down on the left side. It was like a routine, plopping on the left side, scrolling through Facebook as Arin plugged in the game, then wobbling as Arin threw himself into the right side of the couch. We had both made considerable butt marks in the cushions, even though his was bigger than mine. If you looked at the indents you probably wouldn’t be able to tell anyone had ever sat in my spot.

 “ The amount of ready I have in my body is incredible.” It was so comforting to hear him talk. He’s so unique it makes my heart flutter.

 “Would you say it’s inc-READY-ble?” I snickered at my own stupidity, and he genuinely laughed at the joke. As Arin started up the game I pulled my legs up to the couch and leaned forward onto my elbows to get a better look at the TV. Excitement poured out of both of us as the story unfurled, Arin failing puzzles again and again and getting amusingly frustrated. We laughed so much at his screw-ups because it never really got to him. That’s the fun of gaming though, if it was too easy it wouldn’t be fun.

 He decided it was my turn to try it out, which was not a great decision. The further I got the more irritated I became. And unlike Arin, I was not casually upset. I was angry and wanted to hit things. He tried his best to encourage you, but to no avail. You thrust the controller back into Arin’s hands and crossed your arms.

 “Oooh come on Y/N, you’re not that bad.” He clutched his arm around your shoulder and pulled you to him as a fake comforting notion. “At least you’re the pretty one here.” I loved hearing him compliment me, but I still pouted. It was just  game, I would get over it. Turning to look at him, I stuck my tongue out, and made myself smile. I couldn’t stay mad around him, he was just such a sweet presence.

 He kept his hand rested on my shoulder, his face inches from mine. I could feel my entire face grow red as he looked into my eyes. And then I forgot how to breathe. The look of fear must have been plastered across my face; his eyes quickly widened and he pulled his arm back to himself and gripped the controller to go back to playing. We both stared at the screen while the character jumped through portals and grabbed boxes. Arin paused the game and leaned his head against his hand, looking at me.

 I didn’t look at him, I knew I couldn’t. Too embarrassed, I stood up and quickly gathered my things and slipped my flats back on. “I should go.”

 “You don’t have to…” Arin protested. I paused with my hand over the door knob and debated turning back. What would happen if I did? If I didn’t? I decided against it and opened the door.

 “I’ll see you tomorrow.” I peered back over my shoulder to see him sitting at the edge of the couch watching me, a helpless look in his eyes. My face flushed once more as I panicked and loudly shut the door behind me. My car was uninviting, and the rear view mirror criticized me. I judged it back though, I couldn’t let it win. “I know I have feelings for him so shut up! I’ll tell him when I’m ready! Not now!” Turning the car on, I sped away hoping for a quick drive home. I felt awful and conflicted.

 “If not now, then when?”

[oliver-dash]

He nodded, rubbing his little forehead. "My head does hurt a little, even though mummy kissed it for me." He said softly.

McGonagall stepped forward then, smiling softly at the little boy, not wanting to frighten him. "We will get you all a room prepared for Mr. Malfoy's stay. How about you lot take him for a bit of a tour? I'm sure he would like the dragon statue on the forth floor."

"A dragon statue?" He asked, eyes wide, already in awe. He quickly turned around and looked at Re', practically bouncing from foot to foot. "Can we's go see it, Re? Please? Pretty please, please, please please pleeeeaaasse? With chocolate frogs and acid pops on top?"

Blaise couldn't help a warm laugh, grinning crookedly at Re. "He hasn't really changed that much, has he?"

She smiled at him as she knelt at his level. She reached up to brush the hair from his forehead, giggling softly as it fell back into place. “Oh they are very nice. They, uh … they were just really worried when you hit your head. You scared them is all,” she almost cooed. “We can’t have any more bumps to your adorable little head.” 

[gaysbashback]

noo I'm seriously so awkward and you'll probably hate me like most people doo >~

noooo!!! I promise I won’t hate you