#pressurized containers make me Nervous lmao

[piplupod]

guy at the centre was doing smth rly weird on the couch today and i have Zero clue what it was but the centre leader had to have a big long talk with him bc he caught him doing whatever it was he was doing (actually i was the one that pointed out that he was doing smth weird bc i was getting nervous the thing he was tinkering with was going to explode or smth bc it was a pressurized container) and I'm SOOOO fucking curious abt it. he had some kind of pressurized spray can and had a lighter out too? and a knife?? im just so fascinated like... my guy WHAT were u doing !!

[joeyb1989]

accidentally* - joe burrow

word count: 6.2k

pairing: joe burrow x reader

warnings: smut, fwb, small angst, love triangle, fluff, cussing

a/n: okay i decided to split this up into parts because im not sure if i want this to be a series yet or not LMAO. i’m not sure how many parts there would be, but right now there’s at least one more part planned. the next part should be out within the next week or so. also if some of this looks familiar, remember i posted a sneak peek a few days ago. i hope you all enjoy 💕

edit: after starting to write the third part of this series, i decided to change the timeline a bit. the series now starts before OTA’s (which are taking place during April for the sake of the story) instead of training camp.

——

April 2024

“Well if it isn’t my favorite media manager,” Joe smiled at you, waving over the bartender.

You smiled at the much taller quarterback, who was now sitting next to you.

OTA’s were starting the following week and Coach Taylor wanted the team and staff to have fun before the season began.

“Well if it isn't my favorite quarterback,” you teased.

You’d been working for the Bengals for as long as Joe has played for them. On your first day, you had a little incident – which introduced you to the dirty blonde.

Flashback to your first day

It was your first day working for the Bengals media team. You were so anxious about your first day. You were fresh out of college and felt intense pressure on you to succeed. You had only been in the facility for 30 minutes and you were already wishing the day was over. Not that you hated your job already, you were just so nervous.

You had been in a meeting with the rest of the media team – which you had just learned is a frequent thing – when you had to rush across the facility to get all the equipment that would be needed for the practice that day. As you rounded a corner, you were hurrying and not paying attention until you felt your body collide with somebody else’s. You look to see that you spilled your iced coffee on a very tall, and very fit man’s white t-shirt.

“Oh my god, I’m so, so sorry,” you apologized, picking up the plastic cup and ice cubes off the floor.

“No, I’m sorry,” he said, helping you pick up the rest of the ice.

“I wasn't looking where I was going,” you both said in unison.

You both laughed before he extended his hand to you, “I’m Joe.”

“I’m Y/n,” you smiled, shaking his hand.

You had heard a couple of your co-workers gossiping about the rookie quarterback named Joe. They said that he was handsome but you never imagined him to be this handsome.

“You look awfully pretty to be a football player,” Joe said with a smirk

Your cheeks heated up at his compliment, “I’m the new media team intern.”

“Ah, that makes more sense,” he laughed, “make sure to get my good side out there.”

“I’ll try my best,” you giggled

“I’ll see you around, Y/n.”

“I’ll see you around, Joe,” you said, making your way to get the camera equipment.

End of flashback

After your and Joe’s little mishap on your first day, it sparked something between you two. Both of you had just gotten out of long-term relationships just before you met, so by ‘spark,’ you meant friends with benefits; even though both of you always felt something more.

“Will you put her drinks on my tab?” Joe asked the bartender.

“You don’t have to do that,” you smiled

“But I want to,” Joe smiled back.

After talking for about 20 minutes about anything and everything while drinking many rounds, you both were hammered.

All of a sudden, Joe loudly gasped, “We should play darts!”

“Okay,” you chirped, “Let’s do it!”

Joe led you over to the dart board, where he was destroying you.

“Joeeee, I never was very good at darts,” you whined

Joe smiled before walking behind you, “Let me help.”

His large left hand was on your hip, your back was against his chest, and you could feel his cock on your ass. His right hand guided yours, which contained a dart, to the board, getting you 20 points. Your breath hitched when he leaned down and whispered in your ear, “Has anyone told you that you look absolutely sexy in this dress.”

Even though you and Joe have hooked up a bunch of times, you swore you could have seen a twinkle in his eyes.

“Mmm, no,” you say, “just you.”

“I don't believe you,” Joe chuckled. “You’re the most gorgeous woman in this place,” he whispered. His words were so sweet that you literally thought you died and this was heaven. Your stomach filled with butterflies at his words. You turned around in his grasp, his arms going around your waist as your hands landed on his chest.

“I think you’re the most handsome man here,” you smiled

You leaned forward and captured his lips in a sweet kiss before it heated up. His hand fell from your waist to your ass as you sucked on his bottom lip. You two pulled away for air when he bent down to whisper in your ear again, “Let’s get out of here.”

20 minutes later

“Oh my g- god, Joe!” you moaned as your orgasm washed over you. After leaving the bar in an Uber, Joe spent some time worshiping your body and eating you out like you were his last meal once you arrived at his place

He continued lapping your juices up as you came down from your climax. Once your breathing returned to normal, he leaned over the top of you, pressing feather-like kisses to your jaw.

“Are you okay?” he asked

“Mhm,” you smile, “but I need you inside of me.” 

His eyes grew darker and filled with lust at your words. At the speed of light, he pulled his jeans and boxers down. 

Now that he was free, you look at his thick and pulsing cock. Precum was dripping out of his tip as he lined himself up with your core. No matter how many times you’ve seen it, his dick is always mesmerizing to you

He teased your slick folds with his tip, chuckling when you became a whimpering mess under him. 

“Please Joe,” you whined

“Please what, baby?” Joe asked with a smirk

“Please, fuck me,” you moaned

That was all Joe needed to hear before he sank his cock into you. You both moaned at the sensation of being balls-deep inside of you. “Let me know when it’s okay for me to move,” Joe said as he peppered kisses on your forehead. Joe was always sweet with you while fooling around with you. You always wondered what he was like with girlfriends if he was this sweet with his fuck-buddy.

After a couple of minutes, you gave him the okay to move. His thrusts started slow and gentle, afraid he might hurt you. He soon quickened up the pace, his tip ramming into your cervix with each thrust.

“You are so. fucking. tight.,” he groaned, punctuating each word with a rough thrust. 

“Joe- oh my- don’t stop!” you moaned, your hands moving to send scratches down his toned back.

“Y/n,” Joe moaned into your neck, “You feel so good, baby.”

You pull on Joe’s curls, guiding his head so that your lips meet for a sloppy kiss.

After one particularly rough thrust, his cock grazing your g-spot, you felt that unmistakable feeling in your belly building up, begging to be released.

“Joe… I’m gonna cum-” you moaned into his mouth

“Fuck, me too,” Joe moved his hand down to where you two connected, rubbing soft circles on your clit.

You were practically screaming when you came for a second time. After a few more rough thrusts, Joe shot his hot load into you, before collapsing onto your chest.

Once you both came down from your highs, Joe pulled out of you and got up. He headed for the bathroom, coming back into the bedroom a couple of minutes later with a wet washcloth. He cleaned you up before crawling back into bed. He pulled you into his chest, kissing your forehead delicately.

“Goodnight, Y/n,” Joe yawned

“Goodnight, Joey,” you smiled.

The next morning

The bright sunlight seeped into the room from Joe’s window. For a minute, you were confused about where you were until you remembered the events of last night. Feeling weight on your chest, you look down to see Joe with his head on your chest, his curls falling over his forehead. His arms were wrapped loosely around your waist. You brought your hand up to his curls, lightly brushing them out of his closed eyes until he began to stir in his sleep.

He slowly opened his eyes, meeting your gaze as a small smile made its way onto his face.

“Good morning,” he smiled, rolling off of you after pressing a kiss to your cheek and walking into his closet. He comes back a moment later with an old t-shirt of his and a pair of sweats. “I figured you would want to change into something more comfortable,” he smiled.

“Thank you,” you smile at his effort to keep you as comfortable as possible. As amazing as sex was with Joe, the aftercare was even better.

“I’m going to go start breakfast,” he smiles, stepping into fresh boxers and sweatpants.

“You don’t have to do that for me-” you say

“But I want to,” Joe interrupts you, echoing his words from last night

“Okay, I’ll be down there in a minute,” you sigh, playfully rolling your eyes. He nods and sends you a sweet smile before walking out of the room.

You sigh again, thinking about the conversation you had with Joe last night. Not once has Joe ever complimented you like that. People say that drunk words are sober thoughts, so were his words last night how he really feels? Or was it all of that tequila he drank? 

“Ooooh, something smells nice down here,” you smile at the smell of the delicious breakfast Joe is making, “What is it?”

“Breakfast burritos,” he smiles, “There’s scrambled eggs, roasted potatoes, shredded cheese, avocado, turkey bacon, and salsa.”

“Yum,” you say, “That makes my mouth water just thinking about it,”

“I also know you like to have coffee every morning, so I made you some,” he smiles while handing you a mug, but it turns into a grimace, “I hope I didn't make it too sweet for you.”

You take a long sip of the hot drink, smiling because it tastes just the way you like it, “It’s perfect, Joe, thank you.”

You stare at him for a few seconds, furrowing your brows. “How do you know how I like my coffee?”

“I could say that I could tell when a certain someone spilled it on me, but you make it every time you’re over here.”

“Oh my god,” you cover your face with your hands, “that was the worst day of my life.”

“Wow the day you met me was the worst day of your life? Thanks, Y/n,” Joe joked

You playfully roll your eyes at him, “I didn't think you paid that much attention.” 

“Go sit down, I’ll bring the burritos over in a sec,” Joe smiled before you did his bidding

You two exchanged some small talk over the heavenly burritos Joe prepared.

“How’s rehab coming along?”

Joe sighed before speaking, “Pretty good, I’m excited to get back out there.”

‘Yeah, well, in my opinion, you’re looking great out there,” you smile

“Thanks, but who knows how the season will go,” Joe sighs

“Joe..” you began but stopped when Joe gave you a don’t-go-there look. Joe always hated opening up to you about his struggles, so you let it go.

His house fell quiet again, your eyes going wide when you made a realization. “Joe,” you say, “Did we use a condom?”

Joe furrows his brows, thinking for a moment before his eyes go wide. “No.. uh we- we did not…”

There were a few quiet moments of panicking between the two of you before you spoke up again. “Hey, it’s okay… I’m on birth control,” you tried to soothe, even though your anxiety was out the roof.

“That’s not 100% accurate though, right,” Joe questioned

“Neither are condoms,” you state, matter-of-a-factly

Joe nods his head, running a hand through his hair. A few minutes of silence go by again before he speaks up, “Alright, so we should be good?”

“Yeah,” you smile

“Alright,” Joe nods, “We’re good.”

Eight weeks later

Spoiler alert: things were not good.

A couple of weeks after your and Joe’s drunken hookup, he very kindly explained to you that he started seeing someone and wanted to see where it went. You understood completely. Joe wasn't yours and you weren't his, so why wouldn't you understand?

As you were reviewing the new intern’s work, you felt your phone buzz from beside you. You pick it up and see a text from your mom.

Hey sweetie, are you feeling better?

She was referring to the fact that you have been dealing with on-and-off nausea and fatigue for the past couple of weeks. She has been bugging you to go to the doctor about it, but with being too busy with work lately, you haven't gotten the chance. 

Yep, a bit. I should be alright to come to the cookout tonight though :)

Is your period late?

What?

Check your app.

You closed out the messages app and navigated to find your period app. Your heart drops when you see that your period is, in fact, late. Even worse, you scroll to see that the day you had sex with Joe was when you were ovulating.

Fuck.

Mom, I don’t think I’m going to be able to make it to the cookout tonight.

A few hours later

After clocking out of work, you drove straight to the nearest drugstore to pick up a couple of pregnancy tests before driving home.

Now here you were, sitting on your bed with your leg bouncing up and down, a pregnancy test upside down on the bathroom counter, a timer on your phone counting down the seconds until your life could change forever.

You couldn't be pregnant. No way. You had always been so safe when it came to sex. In fact, this was the only time you and Joe had not worn a condom. ‘I’m never drinking alcohol again after this,’ you think to yourself.

You were pulled out of your trance by your timer going off. You flipped your phone over to turn it off, slowly standing up and walking into the bathroom. Your hands start shaking as you pick up the plastic test, your eyes immediately darting to the word ‘Pregnant,” indicating that you will be having a baby in just nine months.

Your mind immediately goes to Joe as you choke out sobs. He is already under so, so much pressure and you would hate to add to it. He was doing so well too. He was bouncing back quite well, and he seemed so happy. You didn’t want to ruin it all for him, but he has to know that he has a baby on the way.

The next day

After thinking about it the rest of the day, you decided the best thing to do was not bombard him at the facility. So, here you were standing on his porch, the positive pregnancy test in your purse, about to change the man’s life forever.

After knocking on the door, you thought about darting off the porch and speeding away in your car but didn't have time to even think about it until the door swung open.

“May I help you?” A short, blonde woman asked, your brows furrowed at her until it hit you.

Haley.

Flashback to your first time at Joe’s house

You were standing in Joe’s living room, him getting you a glass of water in the kitchen. You notice all his pictures on his TV stand, looking closer to see a short, blonde woman kissing his cheek at an LSU game.

“That’s Haley,” he gave a closed-lip smile.

The first night you and Joe hooked up, you two blabbed to each other about past relationships; Joe a little more than you.

“I’m still sorry for what she did,” you say

“You didn't do anything,” he says

You look back at the seemingly sweet girl in the picture frame. Even though you and Joe barely knew each other, he was still one of the sweetest guys you’ve met. You couldn't imagine how someone could treat him the way she did.

Not only did she cheat on him, but she cheated on him during Heisman weekend, in Haley and Joe’s hotel room. Even though Joe found out, he stayed with her until right before his first training camp. 

“You don't deserve that, though,” you rub his shoulder.

“I meant to throw her pictures out, I’m sorry you saw them,” he said

“No I get it Joe, take your time,” you smiled

End of flashback

“Hey, uh… is Joe home,” you questioned

“What do you need him for?” she asked.

“We work together and there’s an urgent work thing that I need to ask him about,” you lie

“Well, he’s not home. I’m his girlfriend, I’ll tell him you stopped by,” she fake-smiled

“Okay, thank you,” internally rolling your eyes at her.

So much for telling him today.

The next day

“Come in,” you say after you hear a knock on your office door

“Hey, I heard you wanted to see me,” Joe smiled

“Hey, yeah… sit down,” you said, trying to prepare yourself for the conversation you’re about to have.

“What’s up,” he questions

“Joe… I don’t know any way to sugarcoat thi-” you say

“Then don’t,” Joe interrupted, “Just tell me.”

You look at him for a few moments, trying to find the courage to say those two words.

“I’m pregnant,” you whisper, avoiding making eye contact with him

His jaw drops open, “You.. yo- your- and I- I’m…?”

“You’re the father by the way, which maybe you picked up but I can’t understand your stuttering,” you nervously laugh

The room falls silent again for a few moments, both of you still in shock

“Are you… keeping it,” Joe questions

“Yeah, and don’t feel any pressure at all. You can be as involved as you want,” you soothe

Joe just sat there, staring off into space, trying to wrap his mind around everything.

“Y/n.. I just need a bit to think things over, I’m sorry…” Joe says, getting up and walking out of your office.

Later that night

You were reading a magazine about everything expecting mothers should be doing when you heard a knock on your door. You open the door and are surprised at what you see.

“What are you doing here,” you ask

“Can I come in,” Joe questions

“Of course,” you step aside to let him in your house.

“I’m here to talk about the baby,” he blurts

“Okay, go ahead,” you gave a small smile

“I’m so sorry for how I acted earlier. It just all came as a shock and I didn’t know how to handle it. I mean you know me, I’m not ready to be a dad. Even if this definitely wasn't planned, I’m not walking out on you or our baby,” Joe rants

You smile before walking over to him, engulfing him in a hug, “Thank you, Joe. But you are going to be a great dad.”

“I’m sure you saw Haley when you came over yesterday,” Joe said

“Yeahhhh,” you drag out. You’ve made your feelings about her very obvious to Joe before.

“I told her about it and she isn't exactly… thrilled,” Joe grimaced, “but she wants to stay with me, so.”

“Okay…?” you furrow your brows

“I just wanted to tell you so you would know,” Joe sheepishly smiled

“Thank you,” you smiled, “I have my first appointment in a few days, you are welcome to come if you would like.”

“Consider me there,” Joe says, pressing a kiss to your forehead

A few days later

“Hey, Joe,” you smile

“Hey Y/n,” Joe opens your car door for you

“Are you excited to see our little one,” Joe smiles, jogging to the driver’s side of the car

“I am, I didn't know you would be,” you say

“How come,” Joe asked, pulling out of your driveway

“I don't know, I just feel like I’m forcing you to take me,” you mumble

“Y/n, I would do anything for y- the baby,” Joe paused, “I’d do anything for the baby, so you aren’t forcing me,” Joe squeezed your hand reassuringly.

Ever since you told Joe about the baby, his whole attitude towards you has changed. He’s seemed happier to see you, he’s texted you every day, checking up on his little guy or girl growing inside of you. He even offered to take you to the appointment. Not that Joe wasn't nice to you before, it was just different.

——

Pulling into the doctor’s office parking lot, Joe turned the car off, letting out a sigh. You noticed him playing with his wristbands, something he often did if something was bothering him.

“Joe, what’s wrong,” you question as you meet his gaze.

“I’m fine,” he said, even though his eyes told you otherwise. You didn't have time to respond to him as he got out of the car and jogged over to your side, opening the door.

“You know I’m pregnant, not incapable of opening a door, right,” you tease

“Please, you know I’ve opened doors for you before I got you pregnant,” he smiled

“I guess you’re right,” you playfully roll your eyes.

After checking in and waiting in the waiting room, you see Joe fidgeting with his wristbands and bouncing his leg up and down out of the corner of your eye.

“Joe,” you say, placing your hand on his thigh, “seriously, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” he mumbles but sighs when you raise an eyebrow at him. “Just nerves.”

“You can talk to me about it if you want,” you soothe, rubbing his shoulder

He looks into your eyes a moment, before running a hand through his hair. “I’m scared that I’m not going to be a good father, Y/n.”

His words shocked you. In all the time that you’ve known Joe, he’s never been one to open up with you on that level

“I mean, I’m in such a good place with the wrist, and I’m so excited for the season, but what if I’m not around enough for it,” Joe confessed

“Joe, I should be due in March. If everything goes as planned, you’ll be done with football in February. You’re going to be an excellent father too, you are caring and compassionate. You do everything you do with 120% effort, I expect nothing less than your role as a father too,” you smile

“Thank you Y/n,” Joe smiles, grabbing your hand and giving it a gentle squeeze.

“Y/n,” a nurse calls

“That’s us,” you smile, signaling for Joe to stand up.

——

“Okay, this gel might be a little cold,” the ultrasound tech warns

After talking with your doctor, you and Joe were now in the tech room, about to see your baby for the first time. 

“There it is,” the tech smiles, directing the screen towards you two. Both you and Joe choked up at seeing the baby. There was nothing like seeing the baby and hearing its heartbeat that you both made. The baby on a screen in a cold lab room will soon be a little Y/n or a little Joe running around.

After finishing up the ultrasound, the tech printed out the ultrasound and gave you the pictures. “I’ll give you two a minute,” she smiles, walking out of the room

“I can’t believe we made that,” you say looking at the pictures of your little baby.

“I know,” Joe choked out, tears running down his face.

You turn your head to look at him, bringing a hand up to wipe the tears off his face. Your eyes drop down to his pink lips, wanting nothing more to press yours to them; but you can’t. Instead, you just bring him in for a tight hug, while he presses a kiss to your forehead.

20 minutes later

“So wait,” you say, popping a french fry into your mouth, “You think that aliens are already here?”

“Absolutely, I mean… I’m sure that if they are smart enough to visit us, then they are smart enough to cloak themselves from us so we can’t see them,” Joe replies, sipping his milkshake

“Mmmm, okay,” you giggle

After your appointment, you and Joe saw a 60’s themed diner down the street that neither of you had tried. Somehow the conversation drifted from the baby to aliens.

“You’re not gonna see aliens on an iPhone, Y/n,” Joe scoffs playfully

“I guess you’re right,” you smile

“You know I am,” Joe teases

“We need to go back to talking about the baby, Joe,” you laugh, “I don’t even know how we got started on the aliens.”

Joe nodded, “Okay, okay… so we made the agreement that you would move in with me once the lease on your apartment is up, right?”

“Yes, and I should be five-ish months by then,” you nod

“I have the space for your room and a baby nursery,” Joe said, “in case you were worried about that.”

“I know Joe, the only thing I’m worried about is Haley,” you said

“Rightttt,” Joe grimaced

Flashback to when Joe told Haley

“What do you mean pregnant,” Haley screamed, “Joe, I don't even know why you would associate yourself with that slut!”

Joe was headed to your apartment to talk to you after he stormed out of your office earlier that day, but wanted to tell Haley first.

“Haley, don’t talk about her like that. I was the one that didn't use protection,” Joe tries to calm her down

Haley scoffed, “What the fuck do you mean, Joe. She is literally trying to baby-trap you!”

Joe rolled his eyes, “Haley, I know this is hard for you to-”

“No, you don’t, Joe! I mean how could you do this to me,” Haley said

“Haley, I understand that this complicates a lot, but I want to stay with you. I’m heading over there to talk to her,” Joe stated

“Like hell you are,” Haley said, trying to grab his car keys out of his hand, “As your girlfriend, I don't think you should see her anymore.”

“I can do what I damn well please,” Joe raised his voice, slamming the front door behind him.

End of flashback

“How is she coming along,” you ask, taking a bite of your cheeseburger.

‘She thinks I’m at practice right now but instead, I’m with you because she doesn't want me seeing you,’ Joe thought

“She’s not too happy, but she will come around,” Joe smiles

“Good, good,” you smile, “We also agreed that we will see each other two times a week outside of work so that we can get closer and you can build a relationship with the baby, right?”

“Yeah,” Joe smiles, “I’m glad that I’m having a baby with you, Y/n. Anyone else wouldn't put in this effort to make it work.”

“Of course, anything for you the baby,” you smile

Joe ponders for a minute before speaking up, “How about we have dinner with Haley soon? I know you two haven't officially met. Maybe it will help her get more comfortable with the situation.”

‘It’s a good thing Joe loves her,’ you think to yourself

“I think that’s a great idea, Joe,” you smile, not because you’re happy to see her, but because you know it will make him happy.

A few weeks later

“Gold or silver jewelry,” you ask your sister, Abby, who came over to help ease your nerves.

“Silver,” she replied, standing next to the doorway, “You gonna be okay?”

You take a deep breath before replying, “Yeah, I’ll be alright. Just nervous.”

Tonight was the scheduled dinner between you, Haley, and Joe. Your nerves have skyrocketed over the past couple of days. Tonight was a big deal for the future of your and Joe’s co-parenting plan, as well as the baby. Haley was, rightfully, upset when she found out about the baby, but from what you heard about her, you know that she was more upset than Joe let on.

The current plan was for you to move in with Haley and Joe in two months. She was already living with him because Joe found some way to love the monster of a woman Haley is, despite everything she has done to him.

“That dress really shows off the bump,” your sister smiles at your growing three-month bump. Even though it was barely there, you loved nothing more than seeing it poke out in certain clothes.

“Are you staying here while I’m gone,” you ask while stuffing your phone, lip balm, wallet, and keys into your purse.

“No, I’m gonna head out when you leave,” Abby answers, “I need to head home and finish packing for my trip this weekend.”

“You can stay here and watch reruns of Keeping Up with The Kardashians if you want,” you say, knowing your sister would want to postpone packing for as long as possible

“I’ll think about itttt,” your sister replies, both of you knowing she is definitely staying.

“Okay, well I got to go grab dinner with my ex-situationship – aka my baby daddy – and his toxic girlfriend that probably wants to claw my eyes out,” you laugh

“Y/n, it’s going to be okay. We all know that you and Joe are going to be together before that baby comes out of you anyway,” Abby soothes

You stop dead in your tracks, “Abby… what?”

“Y/n… literally the way you just talk about Joe shows me how you feel about him. I mean you two have so much in common, you work together, and I mean you’re having a baby together. I know he feels the same way you do. He opens up to you, he literally treats you like his girlfriend, and the effort he’s putting in for the baby. He can say it’s for the baby, and it probably is, but it is also for you. Sure he has a girlfriend, but it’s only a matter of time before he realizes that he deserves the love you can give him,” your sister says.

Was Abby right, do you have feelings for Joe? Ever since you two met, Joe has always been a great friend and a sweet lover. As time went on and the more you two hooked up, it’s like he disappeared. He was still kind and gentle, but it was like he shut off. He would barely talk or open up to you, but that all stopped when you told him about the baby. He kept his promise to you about coming over twice a week; in fact, he was coming over more than twice a week. Even though this situation wasn’t ideal, it felt like you two were heading in the right direction. Even if you did have feelings for him, there was no way he felt the same for you.

Flashback to last week

“Ja’marr is Daddy’s best friend, but you can’t forget the others either. Justin, Sam, and Nick. You’ll get to see us all play football together, pumpkin,” Joe talked softly to your small bump. This was the fifth day he was over in a row.

Ever since you two went to the ultrasound together, Joe started to call the baby, ‘pumpkin.’ He said that the baby needed a nickname since you two still don’t know the gender.

“Mommy and Daddy are so excited to meet you. I can’t wait to-” Joe said, getting interrupted by the alarm on his phone. Joe sighed as he turned the alarm off, obviously disappointed. Joe sat up straight and looked at you, “Gotta go to practice.”

“Then go, we’ll be okay,” you smile, “You can come over after if you want.”

“I’ll have to see if Haley will let me,” Joe sighs, rubbing a hand over his face

“What do you mean let you,” you furrow your brows

“She doesn't like how much time we’ve been spending together, but she doesn't control me. I’m going to see my baby, and you, Y/n. She’s just going to have to accept that,” Joe said

A small smile pulled at your lips as you nodded, “Well, we’ll be happy to have you over any time. You need to get going though, Cincinnati needs their quarterback.”

Joe’s smile faltered at the mention of practice, making you raise an eyebrow. “Joe, it’ll be okay. Our pumpkin won’t be here for another 29 weeks. You have time to make it up to it.”

“It’s not that, Y/n. I’m just… nervous for practice, I guess,” Joe sheepishly smiled, “I know what people are saying about me and the injury. I just… I feel like I got this far for nothing. What if the people are right?”

You gave him a small smile, holding his hand and giving it a gentle squeeze, “It’s okay to be nervous, Joe. I mean, you did have a season-ending injury last season, but you need to remember that you are Joe fucking Burrow. You can do anything, and I mean anything, you put your mind to. You rehabbed the wrist like an actual beast and it’s time to show the world what you can do.”

Joe pulled you into a tight hug, being careful of your bump. “Thank you,” he whispered against your ear.

“Go get em, Shiesty,” you giggle

End of flashback

“Abby, you’re delusional as hell. Enjoy your trashy TV show, love ya!” you say as you walk out of your apartment.

You wanted nothing more than for Joe to be yours, but that was so far out of reach that you shouldn't even dwell on it.

——

“Hey, Y/n,” Joe smiles as you meet the couple in the parking lot of Jeff Ruby’s.

“Hey, Joe,” you hug him as you can feel someone’s eyes shooting daggers at you.

“This is uh… Haley,” he said motioning towards the blonde woman.

“It’s nice to finally meet you, officially,” you smile, extending your hand out towards her

“Yeah, so nice,” she fake smiles, grabbing your hand and yanking you forward, nearly pulling you to the ground

“How about we go eat,” Joe says, trying to break the tension.

——

About 45 minutes later, Joe was laughing at something you said, while trying to not choke on his water.

You thought the evening was going nice, the three of you were exchanging small talk; well more like you and Joe were having a great conversation and Haley was just… there.

“Do you remember the one time we walked in on Ja’marr and one of his women of the month,” Joe laughed.

“Yeah, yeah. How could I forget? I’m like permanently traumatized,” you join Joe in laughing

All the laughing and giggling came to a halt when two hands smashed on the table, you two looked over to see Haley, smoke practically coming out of her ears.

“Joe, what the fuck are you doing,” she asked, obviously annoyed

“What do you mean,” Joe questioned

“Joe you dragged me here so that I would feel more comfortable with this hag moving in, but it is making me feel worse. All you two have done is talk and talk and talk to each other about something only you two would understand. I am your girlfriend Joe. I am the one you go home to. I am the one who is there for you. I get that it’s all exciting right now, she’s still relatively thin and beautiful, but wait until she blows up like a balloon and you want nothing to do with her, she rants before looking at you, “Y/n, I hope you know that once that baby gets here, he will want nothing to do with the baby. You’ll be all by yourself in our house. Which, that is if he doesn't kick you out.” She smiled evilly

The table fell quiet, neither of you wanting to make eye contact with one another. Even though her words were just simply out of rage, it didn't mean that they didn't hurt. You were so scared that Joe would stop caring about you and your baby. Apparently, by her rant, she feels the same way. Your eyes started to get misty from her raised voice, your hormones, and your fears.

“I’m… uh gonna go home,” you muttered out

“Y/n, don’t go,” Joe pleaded

“No, you two have your thing. It was stupid of me to come between you two,” you walk out of the restaurant, tears streaming down your face

Joe tried to take your hand, but you pushed it away. He turned back around to see Haley sitting there with a satisfied look on her face.

30 minutes later

When you got back home, tears were streaming down your face. You walk into an empty apartment, which means Abby must’ve left at some point. You put down your purse and take off your sandals, about to head upstairs to change when you hear a knock on the door.

You walk to the door, slowly opening it, shocked when you see Joe. You wipe the remaining tears off of your face before speaking up. “What are you doing-”

Joe cuts you off by putting both hands on either side of your face, backing you up a bit as he smashes his lips onto yours.

~ to be continued ~

part two is here!!

[heartloverrs-blog]

Ima just start posting some moments that contain heart related/ cardiophilia stuff, any way, I was going to the doctor today and I had to get two vaccines, I wasn’t expecting i would need them but my doctor told me I had to when I came in two the exam room. Then she left to go get the needles and everything else. At that moment when she left my heart was pounding so fast I could feel each beat pressing against my chest. Next thing I knew she was back in the room with paperwork and the vaccines. She said first she wanted my vitals, so she started with my blood pressure, then she pulled off her stethoscope that was around her neck, she stepped beside me, put the ear pieces in and put it on my bare chest. Mind the fact that I was wearing a low cut shirt so my chest was easily reachable. She then proceeded to ask me to take some deep breaths, I did as I was told. While repeating that for a few moments she then asked me was I nervous, (obviously I said yes but not just for the shot, but for the fact that she was listening to me and she was a cute doctor) but then she stated that “your heart is really pounding it’s okay just take big deep breaths for me sweetheart”

That’s all I have right now but i might think of more times. Also I’m not a good writer so if something’s don’t make sense don’t come after me lmao😭💕

[welcometololaland]

Track Record

Have you read Baby, Make Your Move? Yes? This is a follow up. No? That's okay, it's not required reading.

This fic happened because I re-watched 3 x 07 and I simply cannot be normal about Carlos in his cute little cap watching a softball game. Don't tell me he wouldn't simultaneously be the dorkiest dad ever and yet also an absolute DILF. The man contains multitudes.

Also, this is NOT the kid fic I originally wrote. That one is still coming lmao i lack any and all self control.

Carlos’ daughter is a thirteen year old weapon on the track, his husband is as cool as a cucumber and his father-in-law is driving him up the wall. And Carlos? Carlos is a nervous wreck.

A follow up to: "You get too stressed at track. It's bad for your blood pressure."

OR

A writer who knows nothing about kids writes another kid fic, because no one told me to stop last time and Carlos and TK would make the best parents ever.

Read on Ao3

[soaptaculart]

HIII hi hlloooo i love ur ideas for aa7... do you have any ideas of what the plot/cases that would make up the game would be yet? im so curious, i love constanze and klaus already

WAUGH THANK YOU SM!!!! It makes me so happy that people like our silly little idea ;;w;;

I've got a couple questions like this, the plot is much more of a question mark than the character arcs etc at the moment lol but a brief little synopsis of what we have atm! Under a cut because even if it's brief it's. Still long hrhgsdjf

- Case 1: Athena defends Phoenix in a very lighthearted wrong-place-at-the-wrong-time situation he ended up in. Our excuse for the compulsory "attorney has no idea what they're doing in the first case" is just that she's nervous as hell about defending her boss bc it feels like a performance review except if she doesn't pass he goes to prison, so her mind keeps blanking lol

- Case 2: Introduces Klaus, Constanze and Franziska. Set in an art gallery, which Klaus is understandably excited to visit after he joins the party at the start of the case. The case revolves around a victim who was inexplicably seen alive by several witnesses after they were supposed to have died - just the kind of nonsense Constanze struggles to deal with, but Athena thrives on. This case also introduces a forensic scientist character, senior to Ema, who will be recurring throughout the game

- Case 3: Set on a train because I cannot BELIEVE we haven't had an AA murder on a train yet. Blackquill was a passenger on it at the time and hangs around for the investigation in a Klavier-in-AA5-esque way. Klaus is really rude to him bc he thinks he's being mean to Athena and Blackquill is uncharacteristically thrown off by this, which Athena finds hilarious. A twist halfway through reveals that the train was at a different point when the murder occurred than was initially thought, necessitating a new station being opened on the second investigation day. Athena and Constanze have a heart to heart at the end of it as Constanze is getting very frustrated that she keeps losing, but they come out of it understanding each other better

- Case 4: We haven't found a setting we're satisfied with for this one yet, but this is where shit starts getting real. The case seems simple initially, but it becomes apparent that there are connections to a case Franziska worked on 9 years ago - the GS-4 incident (lmao). During this case, the then 10 and 7 year old Constanze and Klaus were kidnapped to blackmail Franziska into releasing her suspect. She was able to find and rescue them, but while she was doing so, her suspect was murdered, and even though a combination of some evidence young Connie smuggled from the scene and drawings Klaus did of what he remembered allowed their kidnapper to be caught, he also died mysteriously shortly afterwards, and the culprit behind both murders was never found. Over the course of the present day trial, suspicion falls on the forensic scientist for fabricating evidence, but when they go to visit him during the second investigation day, he is found dead, and the case ends on a cliffhanger

- Case 5: A continuation of case 4, now with the death of the scientist being investigated simultaneously as he was believed to be an accomplice to it all. Apollo also comes back to visit and have a nice talk with Athena about how much she's grown already. But as the trial is about to start again, Klaus is kidnapped Again to pressure Athena and Constanze to secure a guilty verdict for Athena's client. The result is a desperate courtroom scramble where Athena (with Apollo bench buddying for moral support) and Constanze have to stall for time by any means necessary, which even the defendant gets in on, while an intermission takes place with Phoenix, Trucy and Franziska searching for Klaus. They find him and bring him home, armed with a drawing he made which contains a clue that will lead them to the real mastermind behind everything, stretching from 9 years ago to the present, with a trail of deceased accomplices behind them... we'll have to keep that last twist a secret though, lol

But at the end of it all, Constanze has found a new sense of freedom and belief in her own unique strengths and is ready to truly consider her own path and what she wants for herself, Klaus is allowed to stay at the WAA permanently and has his family's blessings to be an artist, Franziska can put to rest an old case that has followed her for all this time, and Athena is just feeling generally on top of the world. Good for her

There's also Two DLC cases, one starring Phoenix as an OG trilogy gang reunion case in Kurain village with Franziska prosecuting, which ends up in a crazy double-victim situation with Maya channelling one and Pearl channelling the other on the stand. The other is starring Apollo as an AJ gang reunion (so yes - Klavier prosecuting, finally, and Trucy and Apollo being investigation partners again at Last). That one takes place at a drag race, the car kind not the R*P**l kind, just because we thought that would be fun lol. I swear when capcom learns that the right way to use DLC cases is pure fanservice with reappearances from beloved characters who it was difficult to fit into the main game >>>>>>>>>>>>>>

EDIT: More details on the overarching plot, big bad and case 4 + 5 here!

[hysenie]

can i request R13 with eric? thank you!!

hey! thank you so so much for requesting<333 i made this a bit fluffy w some humor ?? idk if this is what u expected but i really hope u like it:D

에릭손 — R13 ; “you said to be honest stop hitting me!”

wc: ~1k (i tried to keep it short lmao sry)

You were sitting on the floor of the living room, playing truth or dare with your friends. It was Eric's turn. He picked truth.

“Let's go with the typical, shall we?” Juyeon started, giving everyone a quick glance. The smug look on his face not a good sign. “Eric, do you like anyone at the moment? If so, who?”

Your ears perked up at the question. It wasn't a secret for anyone that you liked Eric, not even for him —though you didn't know that—. It was especially hard to miss with the way your smile seemed to brighten and your mood seemed to lift when he was around. Some of your friends encouraged you to go for it.

Not like it worked, because you never did.

“That's two questions!” Eric quickly defended while pointing at Juyeon, who just shrugged.

“So?”

Eric nervously cleared his throat and touched the tip of his nose with the side of his finger.

“No.”

Oh, he's definitely lying.

Your leg started bouncing almost involuntarily. The thought of Eric liking someone else dreading at the back of your mind.

“And I call bullshit!” Haknyeon called out instantly, following with a loud mocking laugh. “Damn, you really like someone? Who is it?”

Sunwoo glanced at his friend as all eyes were on him, including yours. This didn't let you notice how Sunwoo constantly shifted his gaze between Eric and you, a playful but barely noticeable smirk on his features.

He looked down before everyone started shouting and poking fun of Eric.

“Yah, okay, shut up!” Jaehyun spoke up, returning the focus to the guy sitting in front of you. “Tell us the truth, who is it? Do we know them?”

The guys started hyping Eric up so he would speak, except for Sunwoo and you who remained quiet. You pursed your lips as Eric took a deep breath, feeling everyone's eyes piercing through him.

A deafening silence stood in the room when Eric locked eyes with you.

Too many seconds must have passed, because everybody noticed the atmosphere and you felt more eyes slowly stick to you.

“What?” You muttered, breaking eye contact with Eric. And even though you could read the room and gather what all of this meant, you chose not to. For your own mental sanity.

“Wait a damn min— Holy shit! Eric? You like...?” Haknyeon's jaw dropped as he pointed at you. In return, you shamelessly opened your eyes in surprise and let out a laugh in disbelief. Trying to suppress the undying feeling of anxiety running through your body.

“No way,”

“Yeah.”

Eric and you said simultaneously which caused you both to stare at each other. The others just watched the situation unfold in delight, throwing in some whistles and teasing remarks.

The attention and well, the situation in general, made your eyebrows furrow.

What the hell was Eric doing?

Trying to get an answer, the first thing to cross your head was to stand up. So you did, impulsively grabbing Eric's wrist and taking him upstairs, ignoring the boys' screams and the smile Sunwoo was giving you both.

Of course he knew.

Once in the hallway, you waited for Eric to explain himself, watching him stand with all the weight on one leg as he hoped it would conceal the bundle of nerves burning in his stomach.

As you noticed him avoiding your eyes and not having intentions of speaking first, you did.

“Why?” Confused, he looked at you with furrowed brows. “Why did you do that?”

“What do you mean 'why did I do that'?”

“Why me? You could've chosen any other person for your little game or lie or whatever that was, just why,” You quickly babbled, only stopping to look at him in the eye. “Why me? Who told you? Was it Changmin? That little bastard...”

Eric's palms were sweating. Technically, he hadn't properly confessed yet. And yes, although he made it pretty clear, he was running away from actually saying the words out loud.

“What? No! I don't get it... I like you. That's it. What's the matter? Oh and, no, Changmin didn't say anything. You aren't the most subtle person, you know?” A teasing smile played on his lips and you whined. Eric was actually getting on your nerves, making your lip quiver a bit, heart clenching.

“Drop the act already! We're alone, nobody is pressuring you. Just... be honest with me.”

“And exactly because it's only the two of us that I'm getting the courage to say this. Why won't you believe me?” You could tell Eric was getting frustrated but so were you.

“Goddamn, okay...” You whispered, rubbing your hands all over your face and barely containing the little patience you had left. “Let's do this. I'll test you, okay? I'm gonna ask you again and I want your answer to be completely sincere. Be honest.” You warned him.

Eric sighed but nodded regardless.

“Look at me.” You deadpanned, laying your palms down on Eric's shoulders and he stiffled a laugh.

“What are you? A lie detector?” He let out a giggle but turned serious as he saw you didn't budge. Finally meeting your eyes, he decided to play along.

“Do you like me?”

“Yes.”

“For real?”

“Yes.” His answers were quick, making you raise an eyebrow.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

“Did you eat the last piece of cheesecake?”

“Yes.”

“Eric!” Your façade fell instantly and you pulled away from him. The faint smile on his face was annoyingly endearing. “That was my. last. piece. of cheesecake.” With each word you punctuated, a light punch was delivered to his arm.

He squirmed and covered his arm with his hand, laughter spilling from his lips as he thought how adorable you looked in that moment.

“You said to be honest! Stop hitting me!” Your frown dissipated and was replaced with a big smile.

You both felt like little kids, giggling and enjoying yourselves as Eric ran down the stairs with you hot on his heels.

Stopping your small race when you approached the circle again, you nudged Eric's shoulder, both with the biggest smiles on your faces.

“So...? What happened between you two?” Sunwoo spoke up for the first time, trying to hide a grin and failing miserably.

“Eric ate my cheesecake!”

“I confessed.” You looked at each other, Eric with an eyebrow raised but both still beaming gracefully.

“Ah, right. And he likes me back.”

thank you again😭 this was my first req so i was kinda nervous but i enjoyed writing it <3

—🍄

[the-almond-and-the-apple]

you (caden's version)

hi, you.

I started this on September 1st, and it's updated day by day, like a diary.

Please read the whole thing lmao cause there's a lot of shit in here that is later explained and it won't reflect my current feelings unless u read until the end

Bold of you to assume I could sit and write (however many lines of poetry this is) in one sitting.

:)

***

I guess I figured

That I'd end up being

That Guy™

Who writes shitty poems

Instead of saying what I really want to say

I just never figured they'd be about you

You. God, you.

You think you're so Unloveable

Told me that you believed it

That you'd been told it by the people

Who were supposed to bring you up

Not tear you down

And you told me that because that's what friends do

They share stories and cry about their shitty lives.

"I'll never be loved," you say, "I'm Unloveable."

And I know you believe it, misspelling and all.

But I don't

How could I believe it?

I'm sitting here writing poetry about you

For Gods sake

You're the poet out of the two of us

Not me

What am I doing?

"I'm good enough to be Likeable, but not Loveable." You say

You are so unbelievably wrong

Hell, you play music

On the weekends

For fun.

You wait for me after every class we have together

I can't help but smile when I see you

Leaning against the wall

Looking for me.

We text each other compliments

Constantly

Back and forth

But that's just something we do, right?

It doesn't mean anything.

That doesn't change the fact

That whenever i see your name with the words

"you're spectacular, I'm so proud of you!" attached to it

My heart skips a beat

You skipped a lecture on Wednesday

Just to come to snack time with me

Even though that lecture was a one time event

Even though you hate sugary foods

Even though it was out of your way

Even though you dislike crowds

You still went with me

You light up

When you talk about

What you learned in psych last period

You're so excited to share this random information with me

That you stumble over your words.

Yesterday, you told our lit teacher, randomly,

A concerning amount of knowledge

About the pressure points in our body

"Hear me out. I know what I'm talking about."

You could barely contain your laughter.

I spend an hour and a half texting you yesterday

All because you said you wanted to get a cat

We're co-parenting him, apparently.

You suggested we name him Martele

After the joke our orchestra teacher made

Now, every time I say his name, you grin

I caught you staring at me during orchestra today

You were trying to catch my eye to laugh at something our teacher said

How I hoped you were staring just to look at me.

"You're playing with your ring," you point out at lunch today, "what's making you nervous?"

I brush it off, laughing, and blame it on my anxiety disorder

How do I tell you that you're the one making me nervous?

How do I bring up the fact that you usually spin your pen when you're around me?

You smiled at me today

To show me the tooth that sticks out when you grin

"Look," you said through your teeth, "isn't this unfortunate?"

As long as you're smiling at me, nothing is unfortunate

Least of all you

You put your arm on my head today

As we were walking from lunch

"It's because I'm tall," you said, "I've got power over you."

You do have power over me

You just don't know it

And not because you're tall

"Am I reading this wrong?" I ask you on Friday night

"Is this platonic?"

And you say no, I'm not reading this wrong

You say you've liked me all along

And I call you an idiot, jokingly

Because apparently trauma dumping does count as flirting

At least with us

The compliments? They did mean something.

Skipping that lecture? You did that because you wanted to spend time with me.

Staring at me in orchestra? It was genuine.

Being all touchy feely with me? That too.

Laughing at everything I say? Yep.

Waiting for me after every class? That as well.

And then we get to talking:

"I get that we have a mutual fondness for each other, but

is this a relationship?" You ask

What a wonderful question

I tell you that I'm asexual

That I dislike physical contact

I should have mentioned that I'm on the aromantic spectrum too

But I didn't

Because I was worried it would scare you away

"That's okay," you write, "I don't want to make you uncomfortable."

"We don't have to do any of that."

But physical touch is one of your love languages

Who am I to deprive you of that?

The more we talk, the more the pit in my stomach grows

We want different things from each other

Something that the other can't give

You could give me what I want, sure

A best friend

Someone I can spend time with outside of school with

Someone to walk to class with

Someone who makes me laugh

Someone to tease

Someone who loves me for who I am

And for who I'm not

And never will be

Because I'll never be that person

Someone who can run up to you and kiss you whenever I want

I won't want that, most likely

From anybody

I tried to imagine us cuddling on the couch

Watching the Disney movies you've never seen

(which is most of them)

And I feel like I might vomit

And I'm sitting at my computer, crying

Sobbing

Writing this

Because I care about you so fucking much

But in a different way than you care about me, I think

My stomach itches

I pull up my shirt

To reveal anxiety hives covering my torso

I haven't been eating as much as I should

My mouth is so dry that everything feels and tastes like cardboard

My stomach hurts too

Fuck.

I should ask you

"hey, what did you mean when you said the word relationship?"

"what does that mean for you?"

"this is what it means for me."

But I can't bring myself to ask.

Why? I don't know.

Maybe it's because I know I have to see you tomorrow

And you'll probably say something sappy

Call me perfect, one more time

And I'll cry

Again

Because of you

I'm crying now, sitting here, watching the rain

You're probably watching it too

Maybe you're playing your balloon guitar

(you still need to show me that, by the way)

Or looking for the murder of crows that lives by your house

I don't know why I'm writing this

Maybe it's because I hope you have a Tumblr,

And that you'll see this.

Maybe I just need to get my feelings out.

Maybe I'll end up sending this to you, if everything works out

God, I hope it works out.

I really really hope it does.

I'll never delete anything on this poem,

Never alter a stanza, never change a spelling

Because I want it to reflect the emotions I felt while writing it

Maybe not the best artistic decision, but hey

Who cares?

It's my art

Is it our art, because it's about you?

And I realize, now,

After I saw you today

I fucked up.

I fucked up, for real.

I was scared of being loved

Because I didn't think I deserved it

I didn't think I needed to be loved

I do need it.

"Literally nothing changed," you told me after orchestra today,

"We're still friends. I don't hate you."

But I can see the sadness on your face

Hear it in your voice

This is Tuesday, for future reference

The day after our roller coaster of a weekend

(you'll know what I mean)

I wish I could go back and change it

I regret what I said

I do

Truly

But the damage has been done, hasn't it?

I can't go back and alter the past

Can't unsay what I said

We'll stay friends, sure

That I'm not worried about.

But what if I don't want to stay your friend

And you don't want to stay mine?

We both want something more

(I think)

But we're either too shy or too stubborn to admit it

Homecoming is coming up in October

Maybe I'll ask you to that

If I have the guts

If I do, I'll probably send you this poem as well

Not as a declaration of my love (or whatever)

But as a sentiment:

"you make me feel so many things that they refuse to stay in my head, they demand to be written out."

I wrote poetry for you.

I hate poetry, but not when it's about you.

Or, if Homecoming doesn't work

Maybe I'll just ask you over for Halloween

You've never participated in it before

Why not start this year?

With me?

Even if none of this works out

Even if we stop talking completely

If I can make you laugh one more time

A real, genuine, laugh

I'll be okay, I think.

Maybe that is love

The fact that I'm writing poetry about you.

Not saying that we're going to get married

Or get together

Or whatever else that could be interpreted as

Maybe love is just saying hi in the hallways

Or teaching me how to flip your pen the way that you do

Or checking up on each other constantly

"u ok?" "how was ur day?" "got any memes?"

"say hi to the crows in ur yard for me."

What if you've changed your mind about me?

What if I sent one too many apologies

Or asked you one too many questions

I think that's why I don't say it

Because I'm afraid of the answer

So very afraid

I think I believe that I have to constantly be doing Things

To deserve love

Be it romantic or not

Hopefully I can get rid of that feeling soon

Because I want to be loved for who I am

Not for what I'm doing

If I do end up sending this to you:

Hi, you.

It's still Tuesday.

And I still regret not trying to hold your hand at lunch today

No matter how you would have seen it

Romantically or platonically

I wish I had

It would have been worth it just to see the look on your face

(I'm laughing about it now, you'd have looked so surprised)

You tried to steal my pencil from me

I don't know if you remember

It was the first time I made you laugh since what happened

It made my day

That sounds stupid, I know

But it did

It feels strange, writing this to you as opposed to it being for you

There's a difference, I guess.

The fact that I know you'll read this one day scares me

"oh shit, what if he realizes I'm not a robot devoid of emotions?"

That sort of thing.

How could I be devoid of emotions when you make me laugh the way that you do?

At lunch today when you said "the only By I am is By Myself."

What I should have said was "give me some time, I'm still figuring this out."

What I ended up doing was making some random joke

I regret that, too.

The look on your face would have been priceless.

Seeing the hope in your eyes would have been even better then hearing your laugh

If you do end up reading this,

You'll probably have all sorts of critiques

Complaints about how I broke up the stanzas

Or capitalization errors

(Am I supposed to capitalize every line?)

But secretly, you'll be pleased

That I don't only give you the time of day

But that I take time out of mine

To write about you

If I had to guess, knowing myself,

Considering nothing changes for the worse

I'll send this to you right after school

On the Friday before break

That's only 17 days away

17 days since we met, too

Funny how time works like that

You know what?

I think I might do just that

Considering nothing changes for the worse,

I'll ask you to Homecoming

And send you this

And hope I don't fuck this up

Again

"Is this a...Date?" You might ask, "are you asking me out?"

"you decide," I'll say, "consider it an olive branch."

"I'd like it to be one, but I'm also cool just going as friends."

"I can bring some of my other friends along so it won't be awkward, if you choose the latter."

"no pressure."

I think I owe you that choice

Maybe, if you say yes,

I'll wear some 5 inch heels

So I can be taller then you

Finally rest my arm on your head comfortably

I should ask you in person,

If I end up doing this at all

But I won't

We're both too awkward to handle whatever the answer may be

And if your answer is no,

I'll be okay.

Really.

I'll be disappointed, sure, but

Mostly, I'll feel guilt

Because I know what we could've had

And I'll know that I messed that up

And if your answer is yes, hell

I don't know what I'll do

I haven't allowed myself to hope

If I send

"hi. i fucked up. let me try to fix this?" with a link to this attached

What will you say?

If you decide to shun me, okay.

I hope you don't shun me, though

If only to get feedback on this poem

Because I know you'll be the only one to ever see it

You're the only one I've ever written poetry for, anyways

If you decide to say "maybe, lemme think," okay.

If you decide you just want to be my friend, okay.

if you say yes (!!!), okay.

Most likely, you'll be embarrassed that I'm writing this for you

Hopefully for a good reason

But, no matter what your answer is,

I hope you can tell me what you truly think about This Whole Thing

Because we're nothing if not good communicators

And I don't want that to change because I wrote this

Hell, I'm embarrassed too

I'M WRITING POETRY

P O E T R Y

ABOUT Y O U

I'M EXPRESSING THE DEPTH OF MY FEELINGS FOR ANOTHER HUMAN BEING THAT ISN'T IN A JOKING MANNER

I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M DOING

Gotta love that for me

Please don't think that I have the ability to just hit send on this

When I do, I'll yeet my phone across the room and not check it for 72 hours

Out of pure embarrassment

Because this is, quite possibly, the most vulnerable and open thing I've ever done.

That's what poetry is, right?

Vulnerability on a page.

Or a website, in this case.

But I've already made myself a promise that you're going to see this

Sooner or later

So, I might as well go ahead and hit send

I didn't start writing this as a way to tell you I like you

It's turning out to be that, but that wasn't the original purpose

I just wrote it to get my feelings out.

I felt like I was too awkward to say it in person or over text

So here I am.

This isn't meant to be some sappy love poem

I beg you

I implore you

I plead with you not to see it as that.

It's a diary.

You just happen to be in it a lot.

I guess it functions as one, though

One that says:

"hey, I like this person and I hope he doesn't hate me for it."

"I hope things don't change too much."

It's just a shitty poem, that's all

I find it so much easier to express my feelings in writing

There's no chance for buffering that way

I guess that's partially why I wrote this

It's easier for me

I stutter too much when I'm around people I like

It's a wonder I didn't start writing earlier

Even though it's a shit piece of poetry, at least it's a start,

Right?

I'm a sappy person, apparently

Something I didn't know about myself before I met you

Maybe I'm even as sappy as you

Today is Wednesday

I realized that fact at precisely 2:16am

When I woke up from a dream

You were in it, of course

You've been on my mind a lot lately

It's no surprise that my subconscious picked up on that too

We were in Home Depot, I think

Buying potted ferns for whatever reason

There was a Starbucks inside it, too

Suddenly, you weren't by my side

(Foreshadowing? I hope not.)

I texted you:

"oi, ask me out already."

You responded immediately:

"MY LOVE,

THEY HAVE EMANCIPATED FRANCE."

I'm laughing about it now as I'm typing this

Because of course dream you would bring up this totally random information

That had zero relevance to what the conversation was

It's something I like about you both in real life and in dreams

I thought about telling you about my dream today

If only because of the rush of disappointment I felt when I realized

That you didn't actually say that to me

That we weren't actually together

I'm glad I didn't, though.

I don't think I would have been able to make you understand

Just why it meant so much to me

I hope that you know I still like you

That I still want This

I'm just a coward

Because if you Have something, then you can Lose it

And I don't think I could lose you

(Sappy me, blah blah blah. I know, shut up.)

(Blame it on the muse.)

It's easier to pretend I don't care

But I do

I should probably tell you that

But I won't

Not yet

Because you haven't texted me first in a couple of days

And I don't want to seem needy

Am I overthinking it?

Probably.

There's not much else I can do

Except do homework and write bad poetry

And hope that you'll text me soon

I'm realizing now that you don't know this

Because it's all in my head

So how could you know?

I've only said this to two people,

Only one of whom you've met

You sit next to them at lunch.

Maybe if they mention how I feel

Everything will go away

I'd rather it come from me, though,

Even if it is indirect

And even if it is through a poem

(Is that a rhyme?

Maybe I'm better at this than I thought.)

Should I send this to you now?

Right now?

At this very moment?

Walk in to the kitchen, grab my phone, and say:

"hey I lost a bet and now I have to send u this, enjoy."

Maybe that would be the better option

Because we did say we were going to figure it out

But what if this all comes too soon?

I don't mean to be pushy, really,

(no, really. I mean it.)

I just don't have any other way of putting this into words

How I feel

Both my admiration for you and my guilt about this past weekend

I'm not saying that I'm In Love™ with you

Please please please don't take it that way

I use that word extremely loosely and I use it quite a lot

I Love my parents,

My friends,

My dog,

My plants,

Big comfy sweaters,

My books,

Making people laugh,

Hiking,

My cousins,

The city of New York,

Waking up early to see the sunrise,

Traveling,

Archaeology,

Stargazing,

Music,

My cello,

You.

You get the picture.

I cringed writing that last stanza

Doesn't mean its not true

(It is)

I just wonder how you'll take it

Because, like I said before,

This isn't some gross sappy love poem

I'm not saying, "marry me."

I'm saying that I care about you

That's all this is.

And it's easier to say it like this

Instead of on the way to orchestra

Or to math

Where there's more of a chance of me getting it wrong

When there's more of a chance of you making me laugh so hard that I forget what I was saying

Where there's more of a chance of me stuttering and stumbling and buffering over my words

I hope you're just being awkward

I hope that's why you're acting different

I'd even take you believing I didn't like you back

As opposed to you losing feelings for me

Because this will be really, really, really awkward

If you've lost feelings at the same time I've finally come to terms with mine

And if you're reading this, cringing, thinking,

"Ohh, yeah, I never actually liked you," or

"This is super weird and I am Not Looking Forward to seeing you on Monday," or

"I just see you as a friend after what happened," or

"Writing poetry?? Cringe. We're in highschool, dipshit, this ain't a Disney movie,"

Or anything else that I'm afraid of you saying

Then I'm sorry.

I know I told you I don't understand social cues,

But you probably didn't know just how much I meant it.

I could be completely overstretching my bounds and I would have no idea.

Or you could find this cute, who knows.

Knowing me, with my luck, it'll probably be the former.

That would suck.

Happy Thursday, you.

I texted you late last night to clarify my feelings:

"Just because I have anxiety doesn't mean that I don't like you back. I do like you back. It just means that I have anxiety."

You were nice about it, of course

Reiterated the fact that you're okay with us staying friends

Maybe you were a bit too enthusiastic about us staying friends

Now that I think about it

Should I have seen that coming?

And just like that,

What little conversation we had today was strained

For the first time since I met you, I walked alone to math

You didn't sit with me at lunch today

Or walk with me from lunch to our next class

I feel better about This Whole Thing, though,

Because at least I was honest.

I told you how I felt, and now the ball is in your court.

There's no hard feelings, at least on my side.

I hope it's the same for you.

I won't mention This anymore, at least until you do

Because I've said my piece, right?

There's nothing else I can do, even if I wanted to.

I'm still your friend (if you'd like me to be),

I'll still walk with you from class to class (if you'd like me to)

I'll still talk to you in lit (if you'd like that)

I'd still let you play my cello (if you'd like to try)

I'd still like to see your balloon guitar,

To have you visit me at work,

To have you teach me how to spin your pen,

To smile and to laugh with you.

I'll still ask you over for Halloween

Along with a big group of my other friends

Because even though things have changed, I still care about you

You don't have to come, obviously, but sometimes,

It's the thought that counts.

The thought that says, "hey, come eat sugar and watch bad movies with us,"

The thought that says, "you're wanted,"

The thought that says, "you aren't alone,"

Unless you want to be alone, in that case,

Go for it.

I'm not going to be the person who shatters your personal space bubble.

I'd just like to be the person who opens mine to you.

As long as you know that I still care about you

That I still want you to love and be loved

That I still want you have the happiness that you deserve

I don't care what happens.

That sounds dramatic and kind of mean

But it isn't meant to be

Whatever happens with Us, I should have said

Whether we stay friends, go out, or somewhere in between

Even if we stop talking all together

As long as you know that I'd still give you the time of day if you asked,

As long as you know you can still walk up to me in the hallway,

As long as you know that there's still a place in my life for you

(Now, whether you want to take that place is up to you. It's there, though, and it's there to stay.)

I'm okay with it whatever happens

***

Happy Friday.

Is it appropriate to say that I miss you

When you're right here next to me?

When we have three classes together?

When we text each other every now and then?

When we have some of the same friends?

No matter if it's appropriate or not, I do miss you

I miss making you laugh

I miss you making me smile

I miss our late night conversations about nothing at all

(Again, a rhyme? Not bad.)

I miss when you'd crouch by my desk

Rest your elbow next to my water bottle

And ask me how my morning was

"Yeah?" You'd say, "Well, in psych..."

And you'd go on and on about it

(Not that I minded)

Sometimes, I'd catch you glancing up at me

Just to make sure I understood your joke

Or that I was enjoying the conversation

Every time our eyes would meet, you'd stop talking

For a split second

And pause to shake the hair out of your eyes

To see me better, maybe

Or maybe you were just self conscious

Sometimes, I'd glance backwards at you during class

Right after you went back to your desk

And I'd get to see you smile to yourself

About some joke I'd made the minute before

I realize that I could be idealizing this

I know it wasn't all flowers and daydreams and laughter and teasing

But it doesn't really matter, does it?

I had fun.

I think you did as well.

Doesn't change the fact that I still grin when you do

Doesn't change the fact that I wish we'd hang out more

I still see things that remind me of you

And wish we were close enough for me to show it to you

Without getting a one word response

I know the best solution to this is,

Simply enough:

Talk to you

I don't want to invade your personal space

If you don't want to talk to me, that's fine

I still text you first, though

Still smile at you in class

I hope that says, "Hi. You can talk to me if you want. I want to talk to you."

But I'll let you approach me first

Because I've already texted you about This

Now it's your turn

I'd like to think that you're just scared to bring it up

Not that you don't care about me anymore

That very well could be wishful thinking

(I did say like to think, didn't I?)

Knowing me, though

With my everlasting optimism

I'll assume the best until proven otherwise

I'll just assume you're being awkward

Or shy

Or anxious

Even if the signs are there that you're done

Done with me

***

It's Saturday, this time

And I have a thought

That thought is this:

I'd rather have you hate me than feel nothing towards me

Because the opposite of love isn't hate

It's apathy

Hate means that I'm still in your mind

But apathy?

You'd never think of me again

***

Sunday.

I've done this before, actually.

Being friends with a guy,

then the Talking Phase.

When we inevitably grew apart,

It didn't bother me

Because I didn't know what I was losing

I didn't realize that I was flirting with him

And he back at me

I just thought that was what friends did

I figured it was normal

So when we got our schedules

And I moved up a level in orchestra

Without him

Leaving him behind

And we realized that was it

I grinned at him, made a joke, and moved on

It was easy for me to let him go

Because I didn't realize the importance of what I had

But with you?

***

You walked me to orchestra today, Monday

And then walked me to math

You sat next to me at lunch today

And walked me to chemistry afterwards

That's all I have to write for today, really.

You spent time with me, it made me happy.

Hopefully it made you happy too.

I got to make you laugh for the first time in a while.

Don't have much else to say.

***

It's Tuesday.

Theoretically.

Nothing much changed.

I've got nothing to write.

I should be doing homework.

***

Thursday.

I just read this in it's entirety for the first time since writing it.

Yikes.

I am one sappy, dramatic motherfucker, aren't I?

Not saying that what I wrote isn't true

(It is)

But goddamn if I can't crank out some damn good poetry when the need arises

No, I mean it.

I think this this might be the best piece of writing I've ever created.

Blame it on the muse.

I'm over this whole Thing, really.

I'm done being sad and writing poetry and crying about It

I'm tired of being so upset over something I can't contol

Notice how I didn't say I was over you?

Cause I'm not.

I still feel all that guilt I mentioned,

I still miss you,

I still want to make you laugh,

yadda yadda.

Sappy shit.

I'm not upset about it anymore, which is good.

I've come to accept the fact that we aren't going to go out

Unless you have a plan to hand me a small creature of questionable cuteness and use that to ask me to homecoming

(I'd say yes)

We're friends.

I'm genuinely happy with that.

Are you?

I don't want to you to alter how you feel about me just because of this extremely long and wordy poem

Yes, I'd accept if you asked me to homecoming

No, I'm not planning on asking you (at least at the time of writing this.)

No, that doesn't mean I've lost feelings for you

Yes, that means I'm happy where We Are and I don't feel the need to change This

Yes, I still want to be your friend.

Yes, I am nothing if not confusing.

***

Friday.

A week before I'm supposed to send this to you.

And I've had yet another thought:

(Surprising, right?)

It isn't my responsibility to maintain relationships.

That isn't a dig at you, or at anybody

It's just something I realized. 

I'm not a focal point in other peoples lives, however much I would like to be

And because of that, I don't have to go out of my way to keep them in my life 

If they don't want to be close to me, I don't have to go chasing after them 

I'm not required to jump through hoops just to stay friends with somebody 

It's late, past midnight

(Goodnight, by the way. I didn't text you to say goodnight for once.) 

And I don't know how I'll see this when I wake up the morning 

If I'll wake up and worry about whether or not you'll be offended by this 

It isn't a dig

Honestly 

Just one of the points 

On this journey called September 

That I deemed important enough to write down 

And to share with you, apparently 

To show you I'm growing,

Thank you for that, by the way 

One of the many positives of having people tell you that you're perfect

Is that, eventually, you start to believe it

I don't believe I'm perfect, of course 

I'm not 

I'm too much of a coward and too annoying and far too selfish to be perfect

But I do feel a lot better about myself 

And I attribute that partially to you

***

Saturday.

I really am selfish, aren't I?

Thinking that I matter enough to people

For them to text me first

Or to hang out outside of school

Because nobody ever does

And that would be fine,

If I had enough self awareness to realize that people don't actually want to be around me

But here I am, ever the optimist

And I keep going after people who don't want me back

Not even with romance, I feel this way about friendships too

I've realized I've done that with you

Because if you wanted to talk to me, you would

Wanted to hang out, you'd ask

If you wanted to be around me, you'd make an effort to be

And I'm sorry it took me this long to realize it

Now, that isn't to say I don't want to be around people

I do.

But, like I wrote yesterday,

Friendships are two way streets.

If my car is ready to go and your motorcycle is firmly parked, that's fine

I just wish I had realized it earlier

That's a weird analogy, but you know what I mean.

Hopefully.

It doesn't matter how strong my desire is to have a particular relationship with someone,

Because if they think I'm annoying

Or clingy

Or weird

Or not smart enough

Or that my voice is too high

Or that I've got too much of a baby face

Or I that have too many weird hobbies

(or not enough of them)

Or that I'm too quiet

I can't force people to care about me.

So I just...exist.

On the edges of friend groups

Hoping that maybe I'll be able to make somebody laugh

Or maybe I'll bring someone a mint, as a show of kindness

Grab a ruler bookmark off a table for them

(I grabbed one for you because you mentioned you wanted one. It's in my folder if you still want it.)

Or print out some sheet music I know they'd like

Bring a deck of cards to lunch to make people feel less alone

I do all of those things, and I genuinely enjoy it

Seeing people smile is the highlight of my day

Knowing I made them laugh is even better

I just figured I would've found somebody who'd bring me a mint

Or go out of their way to make me smile

Or send me a picture of something I like, just because

Hell, I'd even settle for a, "this remined me of you." text

Because if somebody sent me that, it'd mean I was in their thoughts

Again, this isn't a dig at you

Or at anybody

I'm just ranting

There's a kind of comfort in being sad, isn't there?

You brought that up a while back

Said you believed the worst because you could only be pleasantly surprised

I see the appeal of that mindset now

Maybe it's the undiagnosed Whatever that I have,

But I don't see how people can care about each other

Without actually showing it

I care about you,

So I show it.

I text you memes,

Make jokes,

Walk you to class,

And write you poetry.

It's as simple as that.

I actually enjoy writing poetry when it's about something l like

Who knew that someone would be you?

[hoe-imaginess]

vanilla | dabi

very alpha!Dabi x fem omega!Reader 

summary: Dabi isn’t aware that the LoV has an omega up for grabs, not until he accidentally comes across you in heat. 

word count: 11.7k

contains: dub-con elements, scent kink, humiliation, masturbation, hella dirty talk, mentions of blood/burns, Dabi being an all around bastard

a/n: commissioned by K to share part of my ABO fic. Most ABO stuff makes me squeamish so I leave out token tropes (aka knots) another private fic that I didn’t plan on posting so it’s kinda uhhhhh bad lmao. will possibly post more but idk. 

DON'T let the title mislead you ok Dabi is anything but vanilla 

⤰

When he found the safehouse, Dabi knocked at the front entrance.

For a long time there was no response, and he tried again, louder this time and with more exasperation.

“Coming,” he heard a shout finally, muffled across the steel door.

Dabi rubbed his eyes to put some pressure behind them, in hopes it might too take that same pressure away from the sting in his nose.

Some heady omega in the area was in heat, and a bad one; the entire neighborhood reeked of the tantalizing aroma.

He groaned, jaw tensing, and with practiced composure put the fire down in his body. He had enough of it running under his skin every second of the day in the form of his quirk. He didn’t need any more. But it was getting worse the longer he waited there with that smell tiding in the air.

He didn’t even know why he was there, doing such a chore, in the first place.

Maybe it was because this League of Villains business was a promising crusade; he’d heard good things and seen for himself some profit in the affiliation, even despite how profusely he disliked the weird hand-guy, or how awkward the black fog in a suit could be. 

The other recruit, Toga—who he found as equally disagreeable as the rest—had all but blindsided him that evening as he exited the dainty bar which they called headquarters.

Could you do me a favor, Dabi? she’d entreated with an attempt at innocent, girl-like charm: a tactic which, as it usually did, failed. The manic grin on her face had only made him want to be away from her company all the sooner.

No, he’d said, and pushed past her.

But she’d skipped after him, steadfast. 

Tomura had asked her to run an errand in one of the more dangerous parts of the city, she’d said, but she wasn’t sure what to do. She was just a girl, after all. Couldn’t Dabi do her this one favor and take the responsibility off her hands? She was too nervous to take a trip like that, and so late in the night.

Bullshit, he’d said, but instead of protesting in defense of herself, she’d just giggled like a lunatic, dropping her pretense.

Still, when she said it was a delivery which needed to be made to you, the only member of the League he had yet to officially meet, curiosity pinched him.

Indifferent as he was to comradery, he was undeniably interested in unearthing the particulars of this would-be villainous syndicate, which included being at least somewhat familiar with his allies. He knew you had been an original member even before he and the psycho schoolgirl came into the fold; but little else. 

You needed a delivery to be made to one of the League’s safehouses? Well, maybe he could oblige, if only to snoop around. Shigaraki was particularly fastidious with the information he willfully shared, and Dabi would take any opportunity to filch information under the boss’s nose in stride.

After all, if Toga, a new—and undoubtedly incompetent—recruit was being tasked with these deliveries, why not Dabi? Why not Kurogiri, who could make the shipment with ease given his quirk?

What was going on behind the scenes that Dabi wasn’t seeing?

Underwhelming as his first task as a newcomer would be, he saw it as an opportunity. He could be a good and useful asset to the League just for the night, he’d decided, when he told Toga he would do it. He was headed to that side of town anyways, he’d said. 

So there he found himself, his foot tapping impatiently on the ground as he waited outside the safehouse. 

That goddamn scent that wafted around the building... Why did he feel as though he’d smelled it before? And why did it smell so… sickeningly sweet?

He tried to distract himself by musing over what might have solicited these late-night deliveries, for example: what was in this suitcase he was meant to give you. 

Toga had handed it to him with such a twisted, giddy smile on her face that he was half-convinced it was a bomb ready to blow and scatter him into pieces for her sick delight. Once he’d found it locked, he’d given up on guessing the contents after he shook the thing and the rattling inside gave no indication of the secrets it held.

More distraction, he entreated himself. 

He thought of the itch of his staples, the uncomfortable tingle on his ridged skin when the air brought heavy wind against it. He thought of anything that might take away from the smell of raw heat in the area, but it was an instinctual pull that left him fidgeting where he stood.

He was about ready to leave the suitcase at the door and hit the road, when there was a commotion from across the threshold.

The aroma that burst from the opening door completely smothered him, made every bone in his body feel like smoldering steel; made lightning shoot down his veins and a low breath catch in his lungs.

You blanked when you saw him there, your pupils blowing wide with shock, then, if he read it correctly, fear.

He sniffed hard, his body scrambling for a source to the scent that begged his alpha inclinations to go wild. The inhalation sent pinpricks of warmth down to his feet. The smell was overwhelming now, almost dizzying.

And it was coming from you.

“Fuck,” he spat, and covered his nose with his arm, backing away from the door.

You slammed it shut, your heart racing.

“What are you doing here?!” you demanded.

“Came to give you this goddamn shit,” he snapped, throwing the suitcase at the door. It landed with a violent thud. His limbs jerked with frayed nerves, like the sun was heating his skin and crawling down to his center. “Are you an idiot!? You know I’m an—”

“I do that’s why I wanted Toga to bring it—”

“She had me do it,” he shouted, and backed himself against the opposite alley wall, a hand clenching and unclenching against his clothed thigh.

Goddamn your smell. Goddamn it. Like vanilla. Horribly sweet. So fucking potent.

He threw his head back against the wall, ignoring the throbbing pain it kneaded into his skull, and breathed hard.

He wanted to bust down the door. His legs twitched at the impulse; fingers tensed and flames licked their tips.

It would be easy. Kick it down. Burn it down. Burn the whole goddamn place down if need be. He wanted to force his way in, wanted to claw at your clothes and shove himself inside you—

Instead he took another deep breath, and loosed it on a shaky sigh.

He’d handled omega heats before, why was he like this now? Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. This was too much.

“You need to leave,” you muttered from the other side of the door, so resolute and aggrieved that he would have never guessed you were keeled over on the floor, legs shut tight and body shivering. His alpha smell was nauseating you; it was strong and dominating and demanding that you open yourself to him. “Now.”

“Yeah I’m goin',” he snapped angrily, storming off down the alley once his legs restored their loyalty to his head, and not what was between his legs. “Fuck."

⤰

Dabi stroked himself hard and fast and rough, nose pressed into his sleeve, breathing in the sweet tang of vanilla that lingered between the fibers.

He growled out his next breath, and it sputtered off into a wobbly sigh as he closed his eyes and thought of you: those perfect tits he was sure you were hiding under your clothes; your ass, which would look like nice, he knew, with his handprints burned onto the skin; and then your cunt—fuck, he could almost imagine how tight it was, how hotly it would grip him and milk every last fucking drop of his cum—the mere vision of it pink and twitching and spread out for him was like an explosive punch to his gut.

He came in thick, hot spurts, some rolling over his knuckles as he quickly twisted his fist over the cockhead, others staining the brick wall in front of him with ropey, white streaks.

“Fuck,” he panted, chest heaving, limbs trembling. A hand shot to the wall and braced himself there for balance, kept him upright while his quivering knees threatened to fail him.

When was the last time he’d even had to rub one out like this? In a dirty fucking alley? And least of all because of some stupid omega?

Goddamn you, he thought.

⤰

“Dabi!” Toga squealed when he returned to the bar later in the morning. She sniffed the air, breathed in his smokey scent, and flashed a hungry smile, tongue dipping out to wet her eager lips. “You smell so strong. Are you worked up?” Then her eyes were bright and thrilled. “Oh? Oh?! Did you see _____-chan? Did you?"

“Yeah, you crazy idiot.” Dabi slammed the bar door shut behind him. "You just forget to mention that she was in heat?”

Shigaraki, who’d been previously uninterested in the debacle, now looked up from his game. “What?”

Toga giggled. “Oh yeah, I forgot about that. Did you smell her? Oh, it’s so nice, isn’t it?” The girl’s eyes twitched and rolled back loftily in ravenous remembrance. “_____-chan smells so sweet. So sweet—”

“You caught her in heat?” Shigaraki asked, accusative but curious. “Are you stupid?"

Scowling, Dabi jerked a thumb at Toga. “Dipshit over here had me take some stuff over to that safehouse you got. I didn’t fuckin’ know."

“You dumb girl,” Shigaraki snapped, turning on her now. “Are you brain dead? Or do you really not get why omegas hide from alphas during heats? Why do you think we have a beta like you go do deliveries now?”

“I know what happens!” she contended. “I thought she could use some company. She smells so delicious. Was it fun, Dabi? Was it fun and romantic and—”

“Try infuriating,” Dabi spat, then set his anger on Shigaraki. “You’re no better. Either of you.” He nodded his head at Kurogiri behind the bar. “Would’ve been nice to know you had an unmated omega in your group.”

“Thought you’d noticed by now,” Shigaraki replied, now somewhat subdued, and tending to his game again. “What, your nose doesn’t work?”

“It works fuckin’ fine. Just didn’t realize that scent you got around here all the time was hers.”

In recollection, he put his sleeve over his nose. The sweet smell had vanished, but the memory of it still haunted his senses, made every nerve in his body flutter with excitement. It was driving him fucking insane.

“How the hell do you two work with an omega?” Dabi asked. “That gets heats like that, no less.”

“We’re not animals,” the leader replied. “Some of us can handle it.”

“My ass. Guessin’ that’s the reason she’s never around, huh? You don’t seem very disciplined. Bet you catch one whiff of that slick and go completely ape shit.”

Shigaraki scowled, affronted.

“It was our mistake not warning you,” Kurogiri conciliated the blame, clearly nervous, and possibly displeased by the crass talk. “We were under the impression that you knew. We’ve taken steps to lessen the risk in our years together. We are somewhat… desensitized.”

“Good for you,” Dabi muttered. “I ain’t. A heads up would’ve been nice.”

“Now you know,” Shigaraki said, scratching peevishly at his neck. “Stop complaining. You’ll get used to it.”

Dabi tsked. “Yeah, you better hope I do.” Then he stalked off.

“Did you do that on purpose?” Shigaraki asked Toga once the other alpha had departed.

Toga keened happily, still enamored with Dabi’s untamed scent. Alphas were so delicious when worked up.

“I forgot,” she insisted dreamily. “Honest, I did.”

“That was a very risky mistake,” Kurogiri was saying, black vapors flitting nervously about his frame. “As a beta, you may not be aware of the risks that both alphas and omegas face when it comes to positions of power–”

Toga pouted and whined, like a child whose gleeful imagination had been thwarted. “I don’t get it. I was just doing them both a favor. Alphas are supposed to take of omegas in heat, aren’t they? What’s the big deal?” She had a stupid smile on her face again, rapt with thoughts of desire. “It must be so nice as an alpha, getting to take any little omega you want… they’re so needy.”

“The big deal, you damn idiot,” Shigaraki started, “is that a guy like that is too selfish to put our objectives before his prick. There’s a reason we don’t mess with that heat and rutting crap here. Complicates things. Makes everyone go crazy. Like you.”

She tittered like a lunatic, proud of her indignity. “She smells so good, Tomura. It’s not fair. Not fair at all.”

⤰

After your heat, once you’d returned to the bar, you ignored Dabi to the best of your ability.

At first, he seemed content enough to reciprocate the caution. You both treaded carefully: any eye-contact made would be swiftly curtailed with averted gazes; you cleared a room whenever he entered, and vice versa, he acted as though you were invisible to him.

It would be fine, you’d told yourself. You’d dealt with the ugly dynamics your omega lifestyle wrought countless times. You could do it again. Dabi was a new recruit, after all. Promising—albeit coarse—according to Tomura. His contribution to the team far outweighed the plights of your personal struggles. You would be fine. It would be fine.

But those lofty self-reassurances were short-lived.

You were sitting in one of the bar’s empty rooms when he sought you out. You smelled him before he rounded the corner, and fear gripped you when the alpha bouquet invaded your senses. But then something else came to seek your submission: an instinctual calling on the wisps of his scent, bringing an anxious and conflicting nostalgia back to you.

God his smell had followed you for days: a smokey aroma, but something so fresh underneath it, like cold mint. You’d never been so enthralled by a scent before, never been so tempted to give in to carnal desire and offer yourself to a being nature had designated as your superior: an alpha.

He stood in the doorway of the room, just looking at you; you stared back, frozen, and made yourself small in hopes that you might avoid whatever confrontation was to come.

“Your heats always that stupidly strong?” he asked.

You blanched and took a deep breath to quell your unease. You wished to anything that the world would swallow you and take you away from what was undoubtedly going to be one of the worst, most uncomfortable confrontations of your life.

“Yes,” you said. “That’s why I have to go away.”

“Why? I mean, most omegas do it. Usually to work it out themselves, right? Bet that little delivery I made was a bunch of toys, wasn’t it?” 

“No,” you said, feeling embarrassed by the mere speculation. “It was a suppressant. They don’t usually work on me... I’m trying to find the right one.”

The broad smirk that shifted his scarring tissue made you shift uncomfortably. “Suppressants are useless if your heat is too strong. That shit was bad. The smell is ridiculous. You clearly ain't doing somethin' right if it’s always that potent.”

You shivered at the mention of your scent. It was always what they mentioned—the alphas. They always raved about your scent: like sweet candy, some said. Most often, vanilla. The sniff of it on your very nose was nauseating after so long: an inescapable quality that put you in the crosshairs of nearly every alpha you’d met, made you frightfully easy prey to their predator.

“I’ve...” Shit, should you be sharing this with him? Normally you did, with most alphas you were acquainted with. Especially those you trusted. But you didn’t trust him. You barely knew him. “I’ve never... been rutted properly. So, they’re stronger. The heats.”

“Never been rutted through a heat?” he asked, scoffing. “Sounds miserable. You’re all backed up, aren’t ya? That’s why you struggle with your scent so much.”

You were quiet. You met his interrogation more confidently than you previously thought possible, given how successfully he’d intimidated you up until now. But your fear was draining away slowly, giving way to some sense of adeptness.

Memories of his scent had haunted your every bodily cell since the moment you’d first experienced it. Although facing it again now was overwhelming, you’d steeled yourself since then.

It would be okay, you reminded yourself. Conferring with allied alphas was only a necessary tack if you were going to keep the peace.

“I have, obviously,” you answered. “I’ve been rutted through a heat. But, it’s not the same if it’s not with… well—”

“An alpha?” he finished, and couldn’t help the surprise on his face. “You’ve never been with an alpha in your heat?”

You shook your head. And then there it was, the returning frailty so thick that it seized the room. Why were you so humiliated to speak your truths? They were truths, after all, under his harsh gaze or not.

“…I’ve never been with an alpha at all.”

He actually laughed. “Nah. You’re lying.”

“I’m not.”

“Never even fooled around a bit?”

“No."

A wry, callous grin stretched his staples. He tilted his head and hummed curiously. “You afraid? Of alphas?”

“No.”

“Yeah, you are.”

“I’m not.”

“Omegas are normally dyin’ to get laid when they’re in heat. Especially when they’re surrounded by alphas they actually know, like you are. Would be one thing if you were locking yourself up to hide from strangers, but you’re not. Gross as that hand-guy is, he seems like he’d rut for ya."

“I just don’t... want it.”

“Nah. You’re scared. I can tell. Should’ve seen that look on your face the other day, damn near terrified—like I was gonna jump on you any second.”

You bristled with agitation, frustration invited back in full bloom now that your confidence was weakened. “Sorry if I don’t trust you,” you returned with grim sarcasm. “You’re not very… decent, to put it plainly.”

“Decent? Nah, I’m not. Alphas aren’t supposed to be. But that’s why you’re all nervous, right?”

“I don’t…” You shook your head, thoughts tripping over one another. “My quirk makes it difficult,” you admitted, and bit your tongue shortly afterwards.

”Your quirk?”

You swore it was his pheromones making you talk, clouding your judgment and wringing admissions from you. “Alphas and omegas dealing with ruts or heats… it compromises their quirks sometimes, I’m sure you know. Makes them uncontrollable and disorderly. I don’t want that to happen to me. Heats are bad enough on their own. Actually getting rutted through one…” You shrugged, vulnerable to be sharing your fears. “I don’t know. I heard it can go wrong. It would be too much.”

“Oh.” He snickered. “Afraid you’re gonna get too horny and flip out or something?”

Heat primed your cheeks in a blush. “No. I mean… In a way. But, thats not what I really meant–”

“So you just run away whenever you’re in heat? ‘Cause you don’t know how to handle it? That’s sad. Bet you wouldn’t be such a stuck up mess if you just let someone rut you through it, at least once. That’s what you’re supposed to do. Forget suppressants. Not just that,” he snickered, and smirked slyly, “it’s awfully unfair of you to be such a prude when you’ve got a bunch of alphas around."

You shivered, not simply noticing, but feeling his eyes pore over you. “They’re not interested.”

“Fuck that. Don’t know if you heard sweetheart, but omegas are made for us to fuck and breed.”

“No,” you said, almost indignantly, “they aren’t.” To be reduced to something so primitive and incidental put anger in your veins. It was a sore, but inevitable topic you were unfortunate to suffer so often.

“Yeah. They are. Don’t know how that hand-creep hasn’t tried to jump your bones yet. I sure as shit would have, by now.”

Then, considering his words, he made a curious frown. “Unless you hide to keep away from that guy.” As he thought of these depraved illustrations in his head, put pieces of his own mused puzzle together, the grim smile returned. “Yeah. I can see that. Putting your own sanity on the line because you don’t wanna provoke your boss. You’d rather scurry off than deal with that guy. You really are scared of alphas, huh?”

“No,” you spat. “Tomura is…“ God, you hated this, hated how his smell was driving you crazy, making you pliant. “Tomura doesn’t need distractions. He’s not very… well-equipped to handle these sort of things.”

You wouldn’t mention how the visual of Tomura’s hands gripping you with alpha-driven need, unwittingly cursing your skin with his quirk, obliging your flesh to break away under his clutches and slowly split you open was a terror that kept you awake some nights.

“I stay out of the way for both our sakes,” you said, shaking the fearsome thoughts away. “Everything works out fine the way it is. We want it this way. We know how to focus on our mission and that only."

He shrugged, unconvinced. “Sure, gotta keep the peace or whatever. Don’t wanna turn the League into a rut fest. Puttin’ the greater good over their alpha needs, over what’s in their pants."

You frowned at him, displeased with the vulgarity.

He snickered to see it. “Commendable of them and all that. But…” He pushed from the wall he’d leaned against and came towards you. You inched away, heart beating fast at the sudden approach. “I’m a little more radical about this stuff, I guess you could say. I think you’d be much more useful if you weren’t so pent up.”

When he crouched down in front of you, you backed into the wall that you sat against, but there was no room for escape. He wasn’t smiling now, only perusing you with expressionless intensity. You tried to suppress a shiver when his eyes rolled down your body.

“Never really been all that concerned with this sort of stuff, not gonna lie. I’ll rut when I need to. Otherwise shit starts getting complicated and I can’t think straight.” He shrugged. “But in case you haven’t noticed, my body ain’t all that suited for frantic ruts. I try to take it easy, if possible. But… I always thought it was a little dumb that we’re engineered to think with what’s between our legs, most of the time.”

And so saying, his warm had slid between your partially opened thighs, which shivered at his touch and clamped together quickly to deny him.

But he wasn’t deterred, and shoved against the resistance, slipping the invading hand under your skirt.

“Stop,” you demanded, breath automating into nervous pants. In sudden fear of being happened upon by the others, you glanced around feverishly, your feet shuffling on the ground to push you back against the wall.

“Stop, now.” Your hands were on his arm, trying to push him away. “Dabi,” you insisted, trying to sound firm. But it did little to deter him.

“See? Bet if you weren’t so damn skittish you’d be putting up a real fight.” His hand finally broke through the tight resistance of your thighs, and his fingers pressed against your underwear. They were damp to the touch.

He laughed, and stroked over the wetness with his knuckle, making you keen and try to pull away.

“Ridiculous,” he muttered, looking down between your trembling thighs. “Unless you were playing with yourself before I got here, I’m guessin’ this is because of me?”

He took the wet fabric between his two fingers and rubbed together. “And what’d I do for you to get like this? You’re not even in heat. And I’ve barely got a scent on me right now. We’re just talking, ______. You really that hot for me, sweetheart?”

At the sound of your name coming from his mouth, gravelly and low, you shuddered, and put an arm over your mouth to keep in a stammering moan. But his other hand came and pulled the limb away.

“Please,” you stuttered out. “Stop.”

“Am I the first alpha who’s touched you like this?” he asked, ignoring your plea.

Your thighs tightened around him again, and one of your hands went to his collar, squeezing into it in meager resistance.

That too he ignored, and looked at you with plain impatience. “Am I?”

You whimpered and nodded, unable to form words when your lips were stuck harshly bitten between your teeth.

“Yeah, thought so.”

Then his thumb worked its cruel intentions and circled your clit. The pathetic gasp he received in turn made him chuckle.

“Nah. See, this isn’t supposed to happen.” His thumb pressed harder and your head knocked back against the wall. “I’ve seen some pretty slutty omegas, but this is plain stupid.”

“I’m—” You practically hiccuped through a whine, and squeezed your eyes shut, your quirk threatening to reveal itself, answering the calls of your panic and ready to defend against his assault. “I’m not a slut—”

He brushed up on your clit hard and you whimpered, defense all but surmounted.

“Okay, fine. You’re not a slut. You’re just damn sensitive because you’ve never given your body what it needs.” He grinned his wicked grin. “An alpha.”

You shook your head. “No—”

“Yes.”

You shook it vigorously now, and your hands came back to life, pushing at him. “No.”

“Yes, _____,” he breathed, laughing. “I thought you were supposed to be smart. Alpha, omega, whatever—those instincts make your brain all mushy if you don’t get it under control. You’ve got some dissonance going on in your head. You’re really letting yourself go because of it. You wanna be a good ally for your boss, but you can’t, because you’re too scared to—"

“I’m not,” you insisted, eyes wrenching themselves open to look at him. He was amused, depravedly amused, but still remarkably composed for how ruthlessly he was teasing you. “I just don’t want it–”

He snorted loudly, and you were sure the sound would echo and bring someone upon the spectacle. “You don’t want it? Seriously? Now you’re just in denial.”

His fingers coiled around your panties and shoved against your bare skin; your pussy was wet and warm to the touch.

“I can smell your slick, holy fuck,” he muttered. For the first time, though everything up until this point had been cruelly entertaining but not entirely stimulating, he felt his cock twitch, and his mouth water. He hummed. “Bet you taste like vanilla, too, don’t you?”

“St-stop,” you stuttered, face going hot with embarrassment, hiding it against your shoulder as if it would help mitigate the fluster.

He let go of the arm he’d been restraining, put a hand on your knee, and tried to push your legs open. He was surprised when met with resistance; you kept your thighs locked together like a vice, making it substantially more difficult to move his fingers on your clit the way he wanted.

He scoffed.

“Open your legs,” he demanded of you, and felt your body twitch at the command.

He looked at you, and was pleased to find you staring back, wide-eyed and jolted. His blue eyes narrowed autocratically.

He spoke his command slower, but with more authority, “Open them. Now."

And when you did, he let out a breathy laugh of satisfaction, and admired the mess of wetness between your thighs. “See? See how easy that was?”

One hand gripped the soft flesh of your thigh—shit, the skin was practically begging for his teeth to sink in, to make you bleed, to mark you—while the occupied continued its ministrations, fingers jerking quickly over your pink clit.

"What if I were some enemy tryin’ to get some information out of you, huh? You’d probably spill everything about the League to another alpha the second he gave your pussy any attention. Shit,” he laughed, head cocking curiously as he played with the folds of your cunt, “I’m just teasin' you a little and you’re already dripping, for one. For two, following my every command like a good little whore.”

You shook your head, wordless in your denial. You thought you could taste blood in your mouth from your own lips, teeth digging in harshly to give your body any sensation to distract from the burgeoning pleasure. Your nerves were trampling over one another, all of them somehow alight with fire, but numb all the same.

“Imagine what I, or any other alpha, really, could get you to do with a cock inside you. Ever think of that? And if you were in heat?” He scoffed. “Forget it. You’re pretty much a liability at this point. Don’t know why the hell your boss keeps you around. It’s pathetic.”

Bracing both hands on his shoulders, you loosed a strangled moan of frustration, fingers biting into his clothes, pressing against the lean muscle beneath. He didn’t seem to care, too focused on the pink, twitching flesh now turning red from his fingers' abuse. He swiped his pointer and middle across your clit in a dizzying pace, until the tendons in his wrists burned and his knuckles ached. But your scent… fuck, the fucking scent—

He prided himself on his practiced fortitude against alpha instincts; his body, wracked by the toll of his quirk, was vulnerable as it was. Willpower was necessary to stave off the feral hunger that often made him forget his own fragility and indulge the fierceness of ruts and heats. It always ended with loose staples and bloody rivulets along his skin. Self-aware as he was of his own limitations, he so rarely let himself indulge his body’s desires.

But fuck if you weren’t testing him.

You were close, you knew, your body spasming and breath catching in every interval. You panicked, tried to fight it, but it was as though his fingers had caged your volition somewhere in the back of your mind, and instead propagated all senses to pleasure.

“Fucking tease,” he muttered under his breath, but you barely heard him above the frenzied din in your brain.

Just as you felt something in you stirring irrevocably, both his hands left you, and he stood to his feet.

You nearly toppled over, and spilt over yourself awkwardly to try and catch yourself on the ground. The wet slide between your thighs was horribly palpable, and horribly embarrassing.

You panted as you gathered yourself, looking up at him in flustered awe as you shut your thighs and protectively shoved your skirt back into place.

He was admiring his fingers, the wetness coating them, and when he noticed your gaze, waved them at you teasingly. “See this?”

So wet, you thought, humiliated, as a sticky strand started to spill from his finger. You shivered, your face sweltering and flushed.

“This is your body’s way of telling you that it’s beggin’ to be filled.”

You shuddered, and held yourself miserably, trying to fight the unsatisfied heat in your veins with calming breaths. “You’re horrible,” you whispered, your mouth dry.

“Nah. I’m being a nice guy. The only smart one around here, too, looks like.”

He licked at his fingers, a shudder going down his spine when he tasted the sweetness. It was unreal. “This is ridiculous. You wouldn’t have to worry so much about scurrying away from alphas if your smell wasn’t so strong. If you’re heat wasn’t so strong. And none of it would be, if you just did what you were made to do. You’re repressed. Backed up as hell—”

“I wasn’t made to do anything,” you argued, frustration returning.

“You can keep sayin’ it, but it doesn’t make it any less true. You’re more trouble than you’re worth, honestly. Got everyone jumpin’ through hoops for you because you’re so damn sensitive. I ain’t gonna do that.”

You sat there in a heap, fidgeting uncomfortably and fighting for any sense of self-determination you could. He’d said his scent was scant, but you swore it was filling the room, pulping your thoughts and dizzying your nauseous head.

“Clearly you’ve been stuck with some pretty underwhelming alphas until now,” he said. “So I’m gonna do you a favor. Next time you’re in heat, find me, and I’ll do something about it.”

He wiped his dirtied fingers on his shirt, then left you there.

⤰

A month later, Dabi got a call.

“What?” he answered curtly, thinking it was Shigaraki from a burner number. The boss did that sometimes, despite there being little need for throwaways. It was theatrical and annoying.

“It’s me.”

After a pause of non-recognition, you sighed, “It’s ______.”

“Oh?” You could hear the smile in his voice.

In the alley, Dabi admired the burning body he’d just finished off, the corpse kindling his blue flames nicely as it crumbled to ash.

He laughed lowly. “Yeah. Been about a month, hasn’t it. You had some time to think sweetheart?”

From the other end, you bit your lip. “I have rules.”

Something seeped into his blood and swelled within him. Like a breeze carried from somewhere far off, he got a whiff of your sweet scent, just a ghost of it, and licked his lips.

“Seems a little over the top,” he said. “But I’m listening.”

There was a sound in the alley behind him, and he glanced over his shoulder.

You took a deep breath on the other end, nervously playing with the hem of your shirt. “I’ll be at a different place tonight. Another safehouse, down by the docks. The first rule is that when you get here, you have to—”

Dabi heard the cocking of a gun. The disdainful comrade of the dead, scorched man had the weapon raised and trained on him, spouting some threatening nonsense of vengeance. The flame-wielder huffed in annoyance.

“Can’t really talk right now,” he spoke into the receiver, his hands brightening with his quirk. “I’ll find the place. Better not get cold feet.”

“Dabi—”

But he hung up before you could say more.

⤰

You waited for the better half of the evening shot to pieces with doubt.

You’d gone over the situation a dozen times, and twice that number decided the uncontrollable confusions weren’t worth second-guessing; dictating right and wrong left you light-headed when your body was already a frenzied playground of sensation thanks to your heat.

You started to text him the address when midnight rolled around, just in case he’d gotten lost—then thought better of it. The uncertain doublet came again: You couldn’t do this. It was dangerous. You hadn’t witnessed Dabi’s brutality firsthand, but the hearsay was worrisome enough. He would break you. It would end horribly. Your quirk, or even his, would lash out—

Then the other half of the fretful analysis: Yes. You could do this. It was natural. It was true what he’d said, about you neglecting your body’s desires, and in turn leaving room only for self-sabotage. The thought of him drove you wild with uncertainty, but so did the notion of not doing this; your body was raging at the absence of touch. One which he was apparently willing to give.

Finally you called him, nerves scattered and patience thinned, deciding that whatever he had to say to you on the other line would determine whether or not you should carry on with your plans.

Almost as soon as you heard the ringing from the other line, so too did a chirpy noise come from right outside the safehouse door: a phone.

You blanched. Before you could make toward the door, the metal lever twisted with a creak and opened. He was there on the other side with his phone in hand, and lifted it teasingly when his eyes found you in the dim room.

“If you’re callin’ to give me directions, waste of time,” he said as he slunk inside. “I can smell you across the damn street.”

You shivered, smelling him, too: he radiated a warm scent, then that icy undertone which always perplexed you in the most enticing way.

He shut the door behind him, locked it, and inspected you. He huffed in amusement to see how nervous you were.

“You said you had some rules,” he started, coming towards you. Your heart started skipping. “Sounds like a lot of bullshit, so I wasn’t gonna remind you. But I guess if it’ll stop you from chickening out halfway…”

His hands were on you in an instant, at your sides, squeezing and kneading the flesh underneath your shirt. You froze. The dumbfounded look on your face had him smirking.

“Not that you’ll be able to once I get started,” he went on. “Or even want to. Probably gonna forget you even had rules once I stick it in you.”

The hands went down, gripped your ass, and brought your bodies together. You braced yourself against his forearms, stuttering when he wasted no time and pressed his face into your jaw, licking, kissing, teasing you with teeth.

Your eyes fluttered closed, mouth hanging open as he traveled down. At his touch, your mind slowed to blind submission. The excitement was stroking a fire in you that you hadn’t even known was there.

Fuck, it was too much. Already, too much.

“You gonna tell me?” he asked between kisses. "Or you already forgot?”

As he moved to your neck, he inhaled sharply through his nose. The sweet scent stirred a frenzy in his gut.

“Fuck.” The hands at your ass squeezed so hard that you gasped. “Goddamn girl,” he laughed breathily, grinding against you. “That shit’s good.”

“I—" You choked on your next words when he spread your thighs apart from behind, fingers curling under your skirt to feel for your panties. “The rules, I—”

“You better spit it out,” he warned, coming up to look at you, eyes fixed with hunger. “I’m not a patient guy. I’m really gonna pounce on you in a second if you don’t get on with it.”

It struck apprehension into you. You breathed out the words hurriedly, “Don’t mate me. Don’t give me a mating mark—”

He laughed in your face, making you blush, then went back to kissing at your neck.

“Didn’t plan on it. Don’t want a mate. Probably never will.” He kissed hard at your neck, breathed in your scent again with a hum. “Besides, even if I did, you’re not bad looking and I know your cunt’s gonna be nice and tight, but you’re not worth mating. You’re high-strung. It’s annoying.”

You bristled with anger, but his warmth was making every other sense dull to you. When his teeth teased the skin at your shoulder, you were wrangled back to focus.

“No marks,” you warned, just as his teeth sank in, and nudged away gently to dissuade him. “Don’t leave any. Kurogiri and Tomura can’t see–”

“I don’t give a fuck who sees,” he replied harshly, coming up to look at you. “Who cares? They were dumb enough to leave you unmated and practically dyin’ for a fuck, so forget them. I’m doing you a favor here, remember that. You can have some rules, but I’m doing whatever the hell I need to do.”

His fingers rubbed hard at your panties; they were wet to the touch. "Not like you’re gonna run out now. You’re fucking soaked.” With a pleased growl he went to your neck again, biting hard.

You squealed, but before he could start sucking at the skin, you reeled back and moved away from him. You pushed at his forehead with a hand, and he smacked it away.

“Then no,” you sighed out shakily once you’d gotten his attention. "We’re done here.”

You spoke it with such confidence that it actually earned you his consideration. He stared at you, half-impressed, but mostly, furious.

“If you can’t listen to me,” you muttered, braving his piercing eyes willingly, "then… then fuck off.”

He was scowling at you now, and without warning his fingers pinched your clit.

You gasped sharply and raggedly at the feeling, melting into his touch with weak legs. He had to hold you upright to prevent you from collapsing, and against your ear, he huffed angrily.

“That’s what I fucking thought, stupid slut.”

He shoved you down onto the mattress at your feet.

You were too dizzy to make a protest when he climbed over you, and had no voice on which to loose it when he ripped—literally ripped—your shirt apart and attacked your chest with harsh bites and licks. Your nipples got the worst of it: he went for them with a growl in his throat, claiming the peaks between his teeth, biting down so hard you squealed and kicked.

“You really don’t have a goddamn clue how this works, do you?” he was breathing out harshly. “What an alpha does to an omega?” He looked up at you. Your eyes were watery and trembling as they gawked down at him. “What I can do to you?”

His lips went down, and he shoved your skirt off of your legs, the panties going too. You had enough sense in you to shut your thighs, which made him scoff, and yank them apart painfully.

“Don’t you fuckin’ try it. This is mine right now. You and your little cunt, mine. Like it’s supposed to be.”

He knew even as the words came from his mouth like venom, that your scent, coupled with his long-unreleased pheromones, were pushing him to a point of brutality. He’d never been so prone to complete and utter dominance like this. And now looking between your thighs at the pink, swollen, shaven pussy twitching for him, he knew there was no chance you’d be getting any mercy.

“Look at this shit,” he muttered, dropping to his knees, and as a protest died on your lips, his own pressed against your wetness, breathing in your scent as he did, growling loud and wildly in his throat.

His hands went to your thighs and pulled, bringing you closer against him, ignoring the fingers in his hair that feebly tugged. A shaky whimper came on every one of your breaths, your mouth sputtering through frail pleas he didn’t understand and didn’t bother trying to.

He indulged one harsh, long, angry suck on your clit, and released with a wet smack. You cried, actually cried when he went back in and dug his tongue harshly against you.

“Dabi, Dabi—no, please–”

Your scent made him light-headed, made him forget for a split second where he was, made him forget the constant and residual pain from his quirk, the itch of his staples—made him forget it all.

You came on his tongue without warning, a loud screech dying in your throat as you arched off the mattress. He was too shocked to lick up the sweet cum that received him. His eyes shot open and he looked up at you; you were an absolute wreck: flushed, sweating, shaking, and seized with pleasure.

He tried to count in his head. How long had it been? A minute? Barely? Fucking ridiculous.

He sucked and sucked until you were writhing. He wanted to punish you, wanted you to see how fucking weak you were, how badly you needed this.

“Dabi—” you sobbed out, tears itching your eyes and rushing down your face.

He pulled off finally with a loud breath, smacking his lips, then went back down to lick up your pussy one more time to clean you with his tongue. You jerked and twisted miserably. Then he was climbing over you again, forcing you to face him.

“You see?” he panted. "See what I just did to you? See how fuckin’ quick you were to cum for me? That’s what you’ve been missing. You’re not in the position to be making demands or rules here, _____. This is what you deserve. This is what you need. You need an alpha, you need me, you need this—”

He took your hand and forced it to rub between his legs. You stuttered a pitiful breath when you felt the bulge there, so hot, so inhumanly hot, waiting for you. Under your touch it twitched, greedy to be inside you.

You shook your head, unable to keep your eyes open; the blinding pleasure made a transit to numbing warmth, and your lids were heavy with drowsiness.

Your lip trembled. “Please, I need a minute, please—"

“No. Fuck no.”

He shred his clothes quickly, pulling his jacket off, kicking his shoes off, clawing at his belt and throwing that off too—but getting no further than shoving his pants down his hips so his eager cock could spring free. He didn’t have the time for anything else. He didn’t have the fucking time.

“I was gonna go easy on you,” he muttered. "Just a little."

Manhandling you to a spread position beneath him, he was almost ready to shove into you—then he had an exhilarating idea, and flipped you over, slapping your ass hard and making you yell in surprise. He wanted to take you like this: dominating, and utterly primal.

He forced your hips up, ass out, pussy spreading for him. He took his cock, flicked the head mercilessly against your clit until you were keening. A firm hand on your hip prevented you from squirming away.

“Please,” you sobbed again, gasping, body trembling. The heat. The heat. It was too much. Your skin crawled with euphoric pinpricks of fire. You needed it. You needed it. “Please, Dabi—”

“Please what?” he snapped, fire in his veins, vanilla flooding his head. “There’s no way in hell you want me to stop, so you’re beggin’ me for more. Use your words then. Say it.”

Your shook your head, mouth dry and gaping. “I can’t—”

He smacked your ass again and you jolted, unable to stop from curling into yourself as you orgasmed; the scent of your slick invaded his nose and he realized what you’d done. A dangerous, slow, ragged laugh bubbled from his throat.

“My god you’re so fucking pathetic. Look at that.” He kneaded his hand hard into your ass, pulling and stretching the skin, keeping your pussy fleshed out for him. “Look at this shit. It’s dripping. I want you to admit how pathetic you are.” He started to jerk himself hard, precum spilling over his fingers in messy streams. “Say it.”

You shook your head, pressing it hard into the mattress below. His hand went for your hair, yanked it backwards, and a tight yell tore out of your throat.

“Say it right now or you’re not getting my dick. I can shove it in your throat and get off just fine.” Oh, but how fucking badly he needed to put it in your cunt... “Say it. Say you’re pathetic, and that you need an alpha cock. Say it.”

“Dabi, please—“ Your hips arched upwards, begging, completely overrun with need. He shoved you back down, dismantling your sanity with every second went without feeling him inside of you.

“Say it now or I swear I’m gonna leave you here, _____.” He yanked your hair tighter, his hand flying on his cock. Everything felt so good. Too good. Too fucking hazy. “I’m gonna use your mouth or these tits to get off, and then I’m gonna leave you here, dripping and fucking pathetic and alone. Alone in your heat like you always are, you stupid whore.”

The thought made you whimper despairingly; in turn, he groaned loudly as he worked precum out in rapid strokes.

“Say it. Now. Now.”

“I’m—” Needy sobs wracked your voice, your hands clutching the mattress. “I’m a—I’m pathetic, I’m pathetic—”

“Fuck,“ he moaned loud and heavy, pinching the base of his cock to hold off release, then going back to stroking again, unable to go without stimulus. “What else? What else, _____?”

“I’m pathetic and I need your cock!” you cried out, too desperate for pride, too desperate for anything else. “I need an alpha cock, I need it—Dabi, damn it, please!—”

You practically screamed when he rammed into you, a loud shout tensing out of him as he let go of your hair. He put both hands at your hips to hold you in place for his violent thrusts.

Your mouth was open in vacant stupor, eyes rolling, feeling another orgasm ripping through you almost instantaneously.

“Fuck… fuck,” he breathed, feeling you tighten around him. He growled angrily, biting his lip until the burnt, abused skin swelled and bled. “You fucking—fuck—” Your slickness was in such abundance that little specks flew with every one of his thrusts, making his cock spear in and out perfectly and without restraint.

Every muscle in his body screamed for release, so soon, so quickly. His balls ached for it, spittle flew from his mouth with every ragged breath he took. Your back arched so nicely underneath him. You were such a perfect fucking omega he almost couldn’t stand it.

He shut his eyes tight, hand going to fist back into your hair and wrench upwards. You didn’t protest, didn’t even let a sound leave your throat despite the pain it brought. It didn’t take away the pleasure; nothing could. Nothing could ever take this away: the stretch of his thick, long cock pounding into you, hitting that spot over and over again until you came once more, then twice, then a third time.

He was breathing so raggedly that it branched pain into his lungs; his fingers dug into your hip so harshly that blood spilled from beneath his nails.

“Fuck,” he breathed, almost like a whisper: an angry, desperate, hissing whisper. “Oh fuck, _____...”

Everything was too much: your scent, the sight of you, your perfect cunt gripping mercilessly with every thrust. He bent forward, stuttering his hips into you as his orgasm approached. Copper met his tongue when he bit harshly into your back.

Beyond his control, his quirk joined the fray of pleasure, blue flame flickering faintly along his palms and burning you. But fuck, it didn’t matter. Nothing fucking mattered but the wet slap of his hips ramming into you, the painful bite of his belt at your thighs, his teeth at your back, sharp alpha canines digging in.

He felt the flames on his face rising; along his jaw, in his hair, they had a mind of their own. He had the sense, just a sliver of it, to back away from you, saving you from the heat that licked parts of his face, even as his hand burned char into your hip.

His rhythm was going; he was close. It hurt. It fucking hurt. He needed to let go. Needed to give you his cum. Needed to pump it in your eager little omega cunt.

“I’m—shit,” he choked, swallowing the dryness in his mouth and moaning long and low. “Tell me you want it baby girl,” he panted. “Tell me you want this cum. Tell me.”

“I—” You coughed miserably, body beyond your muscles’ command. “I want it—”

“What? What do you want? Say it, sweetheart—fuck, tell me—Tell me you want my cum and I’ll fucking give it to you—” You squeezed him tight, too tight, and he keeled over with a grunt. "You feel so damn good. Fuck I’m gonna give it to you, gonna fill this tight pussy come on, come on—”

“I want your cum!” you sobbed, tightening around him as if on instinct. He grabbed your hips with both hands, fucked into you primally now, an angry, seething growl in his throat that was far from human.

Flames on his back, on his arms, on his neck. The skin where his hands held you steamed and you moaned in agony, or maybe pleasure—maybe both. He didn’t care. Neither did you.

“Fuck!” he shouted, just as his hips stuttered and fire shot up his spine. He threw his head back, tendons on his neck flaring, arms and legs shaking as he came inside. “Fucking shit—”

He panted for air, felt staples pulling in places all over him, felt his balls burning with pleasure and heard your mangled cry as he gave you what your body needed, what it had always fucking needed.

He didn’t stop fucking into you until his body couldn’t physically answer his brutal needs, and he bent over you, one last and hard thrust sending you flat against the mattress. His searing body pressed flush against you, met your nipped skin in an overwhelming contrast and forced a whimper from your throat.

He bit into you wherever his mouth could reach, claimed you in any way he could without irrevocably mating you. Lost in the heat of it all, in the pleasure that burned up his spine and gave him vertigo, he wanted nothing else but you: to dominate you, make you submissive, fucking own you until you knew nothing else but him and his cock and his seed inside you—but he couldn’t mate you. Wouldn’t. 

Maybe not yet. 

His flames subsided on their own, leaving smoke to rise all over his skin like overworked geysers; a steaming form on top of yours. The pungency of the expelled fumes would have surely made you nauseous any other time, but your senses were dulled to discomforts and pains alike.

You panted heavily beneath him, quivering under his weight. He lay his head against your back and breathed.

Wanting to push himself upright he twisted a hand into the cushion next to your head, tried to work himself up, but unable to with the debility of his worn muscles.

“Goddamnit,” he rasped, then, forcing strength into his limp limbs, pushed up on a shaky arm and righted himself dizzily. He had to close his eyes, reclaim his vision from the black spots encompassing it, then blinked the room back into focus.

You made some mousy noise beneath him. Then you squirmed, tightening around his oversensitive dick and making him grunt.

He pulled out of you carefully, slowly, every inch dissuaded by the tight squeeze. Wetness made a sleek mess of it all, slick streaks down to your knees, on his own skin, too; splattered against his pelvis, dripping down his balls and his thighs. He shivered. All of this, all of this mess for him, because of him.

His seed spilled out of you when his cockhead, red and twitching, released itself. His cum was hotter than what should have been normal. As it dripped down your thighs it felt like a simmering stream.

The mess, primal though flattering as it was, was quickly something of an agitation on his sweltering skin, and he wanted to be rid of it. A hand was at your back to steady himself, and he pushed at it again to keep his balance—that was when he noticed the full scope of the burns he’d left on you. The burns, the bruises, the blood. He looked upon the violence he’d done with careful regard. He knew from a simple glance, and from experience, that the burns were so severe they would be beyond full healing. You’d have them there forever. A token of his brutality, of his lust.

He closed his eyes and breathed out a sigh to steady himself.

“Oi.”

He pushed at you, and your limp body moved jointlessly beneath him. He wet his mouth to alleviate some of the dryness. His heart raced and his ears felt stuffed by warmth.

“Oi, you bring a towel? Something to wipe this mess up?” Your cum on his skin was cooling uncomfortably. “Oi.” He shook you a little harder when you kept to your silence, and a quiet whine answered him. “C'mon.”

There was a tiny movement: you attempting to push on your arms. But they were utterly useless to the command of your body. A raspy sound came from your throat, like you were trying to speak in murmurs.

He leaned in. “What?”

You tried again, to little betterment. He tsked, impatience entering his body again despite how languid it felt, and smacked your ass lightly, making you jump.

“I can’t hear you dummy, speak up."

You gave up, and trying to muster what little forte you could, moved a shaking arm and pointed to a bag off to your left. He understood, reached for it, his muscles screaming at him in ache, and set about cleaning himself with a towel he found inside.

He thought better of doing the same for you, but was again drawn to the wounds he’d left on you. Provoking an alpha-like possessiveness in him as they did, they were unsightly, and some far away part of him regretted what he’d done. He cleaned you carefully, in the smallest form of apology he was capable of evoking.

When the rough towel wiped over your sensitive clit you shivered miserably, and he huffed a quiet, weak laugh, his eyes heavy-lidded.

“Such an omega.”

He tugged his pants back up his waist and sunk down into the mattress at your side. He’d mastered his breathing again, though there was a heat in his lungs, like smoke, which made every breath feel powerful and choking. The smoke had all but gone from his skin, however, extinguished by his mind returning to lucidness.

But there was still a trace of the ferocious alpha in him there, his legs and depleted cock twitching when he breathed in and smelled you, a warmer vanilla now: something changed and unpure now that you’d been rutted. And he knew, possessively, with a shot of primal instinct going down his spine and making fire roll through him, that he’d forever changed you.

He looked over at you, realizing for the first time that you’d been completely inanimate. You barely looked to be breathing; your inhales came in irregular, heavy intervals, as if each breath taken succeeded a reminder that you were still alive, awake.

He knew it was the adrenaline still rushing in his veins that made him do it, but he reached out, pushed at your head gently so you would look his way, and brushed the matted hair from your face.

Your skin was flushed with sweat. A damp spot in the mattress must have been tears, and probably drool. It wasn’t particularly nice to look at, but it stirred something in him nevertheless. You were a mess. An utter mess. His mess.

Your eyes were closed, pupils fluttering beneath the lids like shaking leaves.

“Open your eyes,” he said, for no particular reason.

But they shut tight at the command, and your breathing picked up, as if you were debating between obeying or not.

“Open them,” he told you again, no firmer, but apparently, it was persuasive all the same. Tears slipped from your ducts when you complied, eyes shining and trembling.

He ignored the part of him that ached to fall into his greedy impulses again. It was alluring. Not just because you were an omega, but because you were you. And he’d fucked you. He’d taken you. He was your first alpha.

Without further instruction to do otherwise, your eyes started to close again, and the hand that still held your hair from your forehead tugged lightly, entreating your eyes to stay trained on him.

“Nuh uh, wake up. Talk to me a little, before you pass out.”

You hummed groggily in response, your mouth open but too dry to form around words. You sealed your lips together, swallowed the dryness.

“Can’t move,” you managed raspily, staring at him, looking exhaustedly vulnerable and knowing you did, too.

He watched you, debating leniency, and decided he’d give you some, just for good measure.

You made an uncomfortable whine when he took your forearm and dragged you to him. He didn’t try to hold you, or keep you against him. Instead when you curled into your little ball against his side, moaning as you did at having to stretch your body’s abused muscles, he let you. What he didn’t deny of intimacy, however, was the arm he draped over you leisurely, just to feel you as he lay on his back and stared at the ceiling.

His thumb brushed over the flesh of your hip, and felt the corrugated, slowly cooling flesh there. The sensation made him grimace. It was so like the gnarly, repulsive texture of his own skin. Not as severe by a long shot, but nevertheless, unpleasant to the touch.

“Hurt?” he asked.

You blinked lazily, his voice sounding like a waning echo to your numb ears. “What...?”

“Your hips. Look at them.”

You forced your eyes open; they rolled themselves into nausea when you shifted to look. When you noticed the pinkish, creased wound on your burned skin, you froze, then started to shiver in your dismay.

“You… I…” Your unsteady hand moved, a finger traced over the rough, still raw skin. Clearly, the pain was lost on you, lust granted. But the sight had your stomach twisting, its emptiness sloshing uncomfortably at the sight of your own damaged flesh; you could even smell it, strong and sickening like cooking meat.

“You’re lucky that’s all I did,” he muttered, selfishly flippant. “And you’re lucky I did it there.”

You took a shaky breath, and shut your eyes, resigned to your body’s lethargy. “Asshole.”

He humphed. “It’ll heal,” he lied. “I’ve had worse, clearly. Done worse, too. It won't get infected.”

You were quiet afterwards, volitionally so, barely keeping your hostility in check. He was more than aware of your chagrin, and didn’t particularly care. If you started feeling it later, he’d go get you meds for the pain. But he’d known omegas to be particularly resilient in their heats. There was very little that registered above the natural pleasure of being filled by an alpha.

“I’m…”

He glanced down at you, saw your mouth opening and closing in determined hesitation.

“I’m not a whore,” you managed croakily, and irritably.

He started laughing. “You gonna hold that against me?”

“I’m not a whore.” You scowled, resentful of his carefree ribbing. “And I’m not”—you sputtered, breathing hard through a phlegm-choked cough–“a slut.”

His laugh subsided into a low chuckle in his chest. You didn’t see the wry grin on his face, but heard it.

He shrugged. “I say shit when I’m high on fucking. Don’t take it so personally.” But he couldn’t stop now that the warmth of craftiness was twisting in him. “Besides…” The arm draped over you shifted, found your ass, and gave a generous squeeze. You whimpered in objection. “You basically are my whore, now.”

You shivered with frustration. Despite the wild—incredibly wild and earth-shattering sex, you were conceiving a poorer and poorer image of him the more he gloated. With renewed strength, you rose on your arm and pushed his hand off.

“I’m not,” you insisted testily.

“I get you don’t know how this shit works,” he started, “so guess I’ll explain it to you.”

There it was again: the possessive, ravenous wildfire in his veins that coaxed his arm to reclaim its spot at your back, bring you closer to him. Adjusting his position, he let your head rest on his stomach; your legs curled comfortably around his own for comfort. He watched your head rise and fall as he breathed steadily.

“May not have mated you,” he went on, anticipating your griping, "but I’m your alpha now.”

You tensed at the declaration, he noticed, but no more than that.

“And it’s gonna stay that way unless you let some other one take you in a heat, which I don’t see you doing. Unless you’re just so dick hungry after this that you let any guy fuck you.”

One of your feet dug opposedly into his calf and he snickered. “Didn’t think so. To the last part, I mean. Trust me…” His hand smoothed over your ass again, and he smirked when you moaned quietly. “You’re gonna be hungry for it.”

“I can’t handle anymore,” you muttered, breath puffing against his stomach. Even those giddy times you’d imagined your first alpha taking you, envisioned a night of passion that would end in ardent nurturing, wrapped under your dominant’s embrace, protected and warm and wanted—you now balked the indulgent, cherished ideal of it. This was not what you had expected. Dabi was not what you had expected.

“I can’t,” you started, lacking the confident breath to loose your doubts on. “I don’t even… feel it. It’s gone.”

“You’re still in heat. It’ll pop back up when your body’s ready. I’m hoping you don’t need a biology lesson for this shit, but point of a heat is to get you knocked up. You get that, right?”

“Obviously.”

“Obviously,” he mocked. “And obviously since I’m not tryin’ to make you a mother, I didn’t do that. Your body’s gonna keep beggin’ for it until I give it to you, and I won’t. So you’ll get your heat back once your junk down there realizes it’s empty and wants to try again, except it’s gonna be a lot crazier this time, since you’ve finally had a taste. Told you that you were only hurting yourself by holding out this long."

You started to follow the logic. It wasn’t anything you hadn’t heard before. But to hear it fleshed out like this, by the alpha who had taken you, felt somewhat like a hazardous warning.

“I just… “ You shook your head against him. “We did it. You said that would be enough. That it wouldn’t be so bad, now…”

“You thought one fuck would fix it?” he asked, condescension taking an amusing slope in his tone.

You didn’t answer, and he grinned.

“You got a lot to learn, sweetheart. Gotta get you through the whole heat, first. Life would be easy for you omegas if one fuck could take care of your problems.” He hummed. “No, you’re gonna be dyin’ to get bred up until your heat is over. I’m not gonna do that, but I’ll fill you up for a little relief.” Something about his own words made him twitch in anticipation, and he put a hand on your head, pinched a handful of hair gently in his fist. “Until you need it again. And again.”

You heart was beating fast. He felt it against his side. “We don’t have to,” you said.

“Don’t have to what?”

“I’m too tired,” you insisted, feeling your body lag into the mattress. “I won’t want it anymore. I’m done. This will be fine. I don’t need you.”

He laughed with such smugness that your cheeks went hot.

“Now you’re just being dumb… But fine. Think what you want. Give it a couple hours. You’ll be clawing at my dick before morning.” He picked idly at the drying blood under his nails, frowning to see it, but too amused by the prospect of your ignorance to regret his violence anymore. “And now, I’m gonna make you work for it.”

“I won’t. You got what you wanted. And I… you made your point.” You shoved off of his body, pushed away from him scornfully on limbs that were seconds from giving out, and sat yourself upright.

Your spine curled and straightened enticingly as you arched up; he watched with covetous appreciation, then saw the red blood drying on your back. He tried not to put out a spiteful laugh.

Let you find the mess he’d made later, he decided. For now, a more urgent matter was making sure his dick didn’t get too hard before you were ready to go again. But you stretched so nicely like that, reminding him of how your body had dipped so obediently for him when he’d bent you over and fucked you cross-eyed.

“You need to leave,” you said.

Snorting, he went back to picking at his nails. “I’m stayin’ right here. Even if I didn’t still have a job to do, this is a nice bed. Better than the couches at the bar, ya know. Nice little nest you’ve made for yourself."

“Then… I’m leaving.” You tried to stand, and failed, legs sliding out from under you and giving your body back to the mattress beneath.

“No you ain’t,” he snickered. “Even if you could find another place to wait off the heat before it came back again, you’re gonna run back to me.”

“I don’t need you,” you insisted decisively, angrier now.

“Yeah, you do. I’m your alpha now, remember?” He saw your shoulders rise with a heavy, angry breath. “You said it yourself. You’re pathetic, and you need an alpha cock. And right now, that’s mine."

“…Fuck you.”

He cackled patronizingly, like it was the funniest thing he’d ever heard, giving no stock to your anger at all.

Indignation compelled you to your feet, wobbling, a hand going between your thighs to feel the hot throbbing there.

That was when you noticed the blood, and some of the bruises. You shook your head, infuriated with yourself, and with him.

“You’re… sick,” you muttered. “I can’t believe I let you… You’re a sick bastard."

He chuckled dismissively, and stopped himself from reaching out to grab you like he wanted to—that attitude of yours made you really fuckable.

Instead he rested back into the mattress, forcing his hands to keep busy on his nails, on his staples.

“Keep it up sweetheart,” he muttered. "When you’re wet for me again in a few hours, I’m gonna remember you said that."

“Fuck you,” you said again, too disillusioned to think carefully on the foreboding, and found your clothes.

Then, forgetting he’d torn them, you threw the tattered garb at him.

He ignored you, unfazed, flicking the ineffectual shirt off his chest as you rummaged through your bag for a new one.

You pulled it over your head, then, with a final glare of indignant reproval, walked off.

He didn’t bother asking where you were going. He knew you would be back.

[leejungchans]

— juliet on kingdom (episode 7).

juliet’s masterlist

from may 13’s episode

note: read the tweets from the bottom up 💕 keep in mind that this contains spoilers in case you want to watch the episode first :3 more under the cut bc this gets LONG ahjdhwjd 😔

— juliet’s outfit;

disclaimer: the blurring of faces in my outfit collages is in no way meant as a form of disrespect, the sole purpose is to put the focus on the hairstyle and there is absolutely no ill intent. thank you for understanding!!

so everyone really kinda freaked out last episode

bc they didn’t see juliet in the previews for the unit stages

she wasn’t with jongho, eunkwang and seungmin

nor was she with 3racha and joong

so that would leave the performance unit right??

atinys were desperately zooming into screenshots of the performance unit stage for any sign of our girl

and found nothing :(

even in the preview that came after the first one, she was nowhere to be seen 😔

eventually some people started theorising if it was bc mnet didn’t let her participate for whatever reason

and the truth is...drumroll please 🥁

SURPRISE

the boys sent her to be in the rap unit with joong 😋😋

mnet just didn’t show her scenes in the first two previews (like they did with minhyuk)

but she was in the previews where they went to jyp 🥺🥺

she was paired up with jisung for the 120-second interview :3

just two shy besties uwu

“why? why are you laughing?” jisung whines, “and right after you looked at my face too!”

juliet continues to laugh, hiding the lower half of her face behind her hands. “sorry, sorry, i’m not laughing at you, i promise!” she says between giggles, “i just didn’t expect us to be so nervous.”

“ah, i get shy around new people, more than what people would expect. so that’s kinda why i’m a bit awkward right now.”

“i’m like that too, but i thought we became closer friends during the sports day filming! i’m hurt!” she says, placing a hand over her heart.

“no, no, no!” jisung defends, waving his hands frantically, “we did! i’m still shy, i guess.”

“not shy, not me!” juliet sings in response, doing the hand movement in the choreography of itzy’s song.

stunned into silence by the sudden reference of his label-mates, jisung blinks at her owlishly before a loud ‘pft’ sound emits from both of them, and they dissolve into giggles once more.

“okay, okay,” she says, sobering up a little after a few seconds. “we need to do this seriously. no more being awkward! awkward is just a mindset.”

jisung’s eyes widen. “woah, you’re right. we won’t feel awkward if we just tell ourselves that we’re being cool.”

she nods approvingly. “exactly. we are cool.”

“okay then, let’s go!” he shouts enthusiastically, earning muffled snickers from the other members who are sitting off-screen.

juliet and jisung go quiet again from his outburst. she even tried to bite the inside of her cheek to stifle any laughter, but her efforts are futile as they both promptly collapse to the ground in a fit of giggles.

“i-i don’t think we can do this,” juliet wheezes to the cameras, clutching her stomach as tears gather in the corners of her eyes. beside her, jisung isn’t faring any better as he attempts to catch his breath.

off-screen, changbin playfully complains, “yah! what are you two doing? you’re supposed to be doing an interview!”

when she entered the jyp café with joong and minhyuk 3racha was like omg hiiiiiii

no one was happier than chan to see her 🥺

AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE OI OI OI

3racha made her, joong and minhyuk sing their orders 💀💀

minhyuk: juliet your ears are so red lmao

juliet: [quickly untucks her hair so it covers her ears] do i really have to do this? 😭😭

chan: yes you do bestie 🤩

“[sighs] americanoooo~ joha joha~”

hongjoong: [cringes but also uwu bc she’s his baby]

3racha: kqjejwjdnsj awwww

minhyuk: ohhhhh~ cuteeee

smh juliet stop (unintentionally) collecting men 😔

okay but changbin treated them all with his jyp artist points 🥺🥺🥺 changbin best boy

juliet, to chan: i’ll come next time to use up your points 😼

minhyuk: me too!! juliet let’s go together!!!

yeah she malfunctioned for a second bc The™️ lee minhyuk just said that and he was her celebrity crush for the longest time pls

she is the most successful melody 😔

she was so excited when they all went to chan’s studio

“ohhhHhh so this is the famous chan’s room 😼 honoured to be here mate”

pls they named themselves 6racha and were literally just having a blast in the studio 😭😭😭

minhyuk: your voice sounds so different when you rap!!

juliet: really? 😅😅 i didn’t really notice

minhyuk: yeah it’s cool :]

okay but when they went to jypbob for lunch

she was so amazed by all the food

“😮😮😮 THIS ALL LOOKS SO GOOD WTF”

the Jeekies™️ making their debut on national tv

yes both jisung’s and juliet’s 🥰🥰

she was so shy when the others in mayfly came to watch rap unit’s rehearsal 😭😭😭

also everyone in the mayfly vocal and dance units went ❓❓❓ where is juliet????? shouldn’t she be here??????

felix: where’s my bestie :(

no lixliet for the unit stages 💔

wooyoung/jongho: oh she’s in the rap unit :D

“WDYM SHE’S IN THE RAP UNIT??????”

okay but as much of a power move this is, she was also so so so nervous

like, the most nervous she’s ever been on kingdom

bc she’s going to be performing with so many incredible rappers, juliet knows that she really has to give it her all to keep up with them

so she was Big Stressed™️ and not in a fun way

it was more of a “oh god what if i’m way too far behind and the difference in skill is so obvious that i cost our groups points????” way

but in true queen fashion, she definitely killed it during rehearsals and everyone in the unit reassured her that she had nothing to worry about 🥺🥺

move over round 2 juliet bc if you thought that was the last we’d see of rapper juliet, you have a big storm coming 😼😼

she rapped with hongjoong before he joined changbin, then rejoined the performance to rap with chan!!

aussie line stans are well fed ✨✨

girlie was collecting everyone in the audience 😼

pls but ateez was so proud of her bc they knew how stressed she was about this performance 😭😭😭

she was so relieved when mayfly won that she teared up before being pulled into the group hug :(((

“i’m so relieved by the results,” juliet says to the cameras during their backstage interview, the other members in the rap unit nodding in agreement. “we all had a lot of fun preparing for this performance, and i’m just really proud of us.”

“wait,” minhyuk says, tone laced with concern, “are you tearing up? why? we did well!”

hongjoong, sitting in the back row, reaches forward to pat juliet on the shoulder comfortingly as she goes silent to suppress the tears. “she was really stressed preparing for this performance, so she’s a bit overwhelmed right now,” he explains for her.

juliet inhales deeply before saying, “because our unit has so many great rappers, i felt burdened because i was scared that my rapping wouldn’t be up to par with everyone else’s. but everyone was so encouraging and kind, and it really helped me push through the pressure, so i’m very thankful.”

“ey, you did so well,” jisung says enthusiastically. “we never worried about your performance!”

now that their rap unit finished performing she could sit back and enjoy the other performances!!

she was mesmerised by it’s one’s dance unit bc their performance was so beautiful

she said :OOOOOO

then came mayfly’s dance unit!!!!

“MAYFLY LET’S GOOOOOOOO”

pls she was their biggest hypewoman 😭😭😭😭

literally screamed during san and felix’s part

then when wooyoung and felix did the stunt????

she lost her SHIT

the way mnet cut from chan’s worried “felix?” to juliet’s “FELIXXXXXX :D” 😭

“YEAHHHHHHHHH MAYFLYYYYY!!!!”

pls she was so so proud 😭😭😭😭😭😭

in conclusion mayfly are besties now ❤️❤️

— fan reactions;

a/n: hello is everyone okay because I AM NOT 💔💔 all the stages from today were so so good and i’m so proud of all the units 🤧🤧💗 i NEED the studio versions of all the songs from today <//3 (and from round 2 too 😭) also lemme know if you’d like to see the full version of jisung and juliet’s 120 sec interview!! 😋 (though i’m prolly gonna write it anyways whdjwhs) your feedback and support means a lot to me so tysm!! 🥺❤️

[cavvaje]

Hearth and Rime | Ch. 1

Pairing: M!Eivor x Reader

Summary: Eivor has had a rough day and you make him feel better :)

Words: 1600~

Genre: Fluff, Comfort?

Warnings: Spoilers for end of Cent Arc! | Somewhat suggestive fade to black

Note: Still a bit new to writing fics, so sorry if its a bit rough around the edges!

I actually finished this in time for valentines but just kept editing it and being too nervous to actually post it? Then decided to retake all the photos lol... 

This is also a continuation of the first fic I put up, BUT you don’t need to read it to understand (it was like 200 words). Here’s a link!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The home is modest for its outwards appearance. According to Eivor, the last occupants were runaway Saxons, who fled the day after they saw him in the area. They didn’t leave much behind, but it’s serviceable.

“Smells good!” Eivor stands by a cooking pot in the corner, setting down the bright torch in his hand. He turns to you with a cheeky look.

“Here,” He says, untying his cloak. The Viking comes to you as you stand in front of the doorway. His cloak needs to go over, and so you squeeze your head through the hole. “This should help you warm up.” 

Gentle arms reach around your shoulders, and instinctually, your arms begin to trace his waist to his back. Adrenaline surges in cold shivers: from your arms through to your spine. Your face is practically buried in the nook between his neck and shoulder. You hold each other a moment, checking off an imaginary checklist of things that make him real. His warmth, his scent, his breath...

A tight tug wakes you up; the cloak has been set, albeit loosely. He lets go of the embrace. Even as he leaves, the cloak maintains his warmth.

“It smells like blood…”

He chuckles lightly, “Does it now?... Surprise?” he flips his axe in one hand, starts drying the rainwater off the metal, then sets it down. He motions towards the steaming pot. “Can I dig in?”

You stare at him as he pulls off the bracers and his hidden blade. He looks back a moment later, puzzled.

“I missed you, Eivor.” You say, plainly.

“Ah…” he pulls you in for a proper hug this time; his arms hold you tight. “I missed you too.” 

“Mmm… what’s bothering you Drengr?”

You feel the sigh heavily from the movement of his chest against yours. “Please, let me eat…”

“Of course! Sorry. Must’ve been a long trip...” 

“No no, don’t be.” He lets go, but locks his eyes on yours, and gives a reassuring pat on the shoulder. “I’ll explain, I won’t be like Sigurd.” 

“Like Sigurd?” 

His weight falls heavy on the stool, as he grabs a bowl. 

You pace towards him slowly, a hand gentle on his left shoulder. “...Did you find him?”

“Not exactly.” 

You feel his rage beginning to simmer on your hand, but it sizzles down quickly. You wait for a few minutes as he ravages his stew, and then places the empty bowl down calmly and precisely. 

“We found an arm.” 

“Shit…”

“Aye, shit.”

He turns to you suddenly, his eyes focused. “Don’t tell the ravens. Please.” He scans your expression. “Can I trust you to this?”

You nod.

“..Thank you.” He sighs and slumps down onto the table.

You stand idly, unsure of how to proceed. The silence fills the room like a cursed fog.

“Perhaps we should talk more in the morning? After you’ve rested from your journey?” you perk up, sitting down next to him. Your hand moves to the Viking’s back reassuringly, and he arches to greet it. “For tonight, let me take care of you, ok?”

He stifles a small chuckle and looks at you earnestly. “That sounds great.”

You smile and get up from your seat. He follows, holds your hands, and leans in close. “Thank Freyja I found you…” His eyes meet yours. You put your hand up to his scarred cheek and… after a moment of hesitation, kiss him. He tastes like a paradise gritted by blood and steel, or maybe it’s the venison... A kiss that feels like a surging tide effortlessly enveloping you. His hands move to wrap around your waist and the back of your neck, and as you break the kiss, it moves back to fall on your cheek. 

He lets out a satisfied breath and slowly removes his hands as well, instead moving them to hold yours. “I needed that.” His voice barely a whisper, yet still raspy and impassioned. 

You coyly move away, tracing your fingers over his own as you leave. “Come… get comfy. Let me help you away with the stresses of your life, Wolf-Kissed.” You begin to move towards the other end of the room.

“Are you just telling me to take off my clothes, lover?” he returns, just as coy, but begins to remove his top anyway. His now shirtless figure is darkened against the light of the fire.

“And you? It’s only fair…” His voice and eyes gleam with a newfound playfulness.

“Ah… but my cloak is so heavy…”

He quickly moves to uncloak you, then slower to unclothe. His lightly calloused hands ‘accidentally’ feel your stomach and arms as you two connect in this growing heat. Both of you a little more exposed, you sit on the bearskin by the bed, absorbing each other’s presence. 

“New scar?” A faded but deep red streak across the top of his wrist into the forearm. He smiles and shrugs. You feel it… still a bit fresh. “It looks good on you.” 

He traces it with his other hand in empty thought, while you grab a nearby satchel containing medicinal herbs. He tries his best not to wince as you apply your treatment... he doesn’t wince once. He’s simply watching you in admiration. 

“What’s that look for? Something wrong?” You ask, knowing the answer.

"You are stunning. Like a painting, framed in a lantern-lit gold. In comparison to you, even its fire seems dull and cold...” 

You shove his shoulder playfully and he laughs, but his eyes stay on you to look for your smile, and he finds it, blushing. He looks proud of himself. Bastard. 

You get behind him and slowly begin to unbraid his hair. It’s matted in parts, likely from blood and dirt. You move him to an empty spot in the room and begin to wash his hair with a nearby water basin, trying not to get him too wet...

“Mmph, you treat me too well…” He mumbles.

“Only what you deserve, and well, much more than just this,”

“...Why’d you say that?” his voice is sweet and innocent. You laugh in surprise.

“What? Eivor, you’re the leader of our clan! At least until Sigurd comes back...” You watch as his head swoops down in thought. You place your hand on his shoulder cautiously. “Hey… what’s this about?”

He doesn’t respond, and you continue to work through his hair. Eventually, though, you decide to break the silence. 

“Why exactly… did you want to meet away from Ravensthorpe?” 

You think back to the letter you got, Synin being a talented messenger bird. He never mentioned why you were to meet here, except that he wanted to meet first for a romantic getaway before he was whisked off elsewhere. At first, that was enough, but now...

“I just wanted to see you, is that too much to ask for?” he retorted.

“Eivor…”

“Fine. Why do you think I asked then?”

You pause. “Honestly, I thought you were gonna have a private issue that needed taking care of, one that needs my particular skill set…”

He looks at you with wild eyes and a smile about to be broken into laughter. “Well! I suppose that too!” he laughs. 

“What? No! I mean if you needed someone, you know...” You imitate a neck being sliced. He laughs again. You slap his shoulder.

His laugh slowly trickles out, and he returns to his thousand-yard stare after a moment, but his mouth moves. “I think… I just needed a break from it all. Just for a moment.” He looks back at you. “With you.”

…You resist the urge to defuse the moment and hug him tightly from behind. “Well if you need anything else, I’m all ears.” 

He shakes his head and gives a quick kiss on your cheek. “Let’s save that for tomorrow...” 

He pauses. 

"Because tonight..." He turns to you and puts his arms over your shoulders. His face slowly approaches yours— and you make eye contact, your face clearly anticipating the worst. He nearly laughs but quickly turns to whisper into your ear. "I have other plans..." he smiles, and lightly nibbles on your earlobe, pulling it ever so slightly. This is not what you meant by ‘all ears’. The actual sensation is nice enough, but the sudden waves of euphoria that washes through your headspace is what makes you a little dizzy. 

"H-hey, I'm nearly done with your hair..." You manage to say, barely. He smiles both warm yet seductive, then turns around to let you finish.

As you finish up with his hair, he gives you a sweet look followed by a grateful kiss. It was a... mostly calming activity. As you get up, he childishly hops on the fur bed with a thud. You turn away to tidy up. However, a shuffling sound catches your attention.

He’s striking a pose... one eyebrow raised. He extends forward his hand and winks at you. 

“Come… play with your Drengr, love…” he recites dramatically. 

You stare at him, incredulous, then laugh in protest when he grabs your arm. He yanks you in... you fall, barely lit by the low lantern light, into your love dance.

~

Sleeping next to him is a warmth you always regret not cherishing more. Just his presence makes this cold and dangerous land feel safe. His fingers trace your arm ever so slightly— not enough to wake you, but just enough to send tingles rushing through to your brain. You return the favor and he smiles surprised, but welcome in his half-sleep. 

…Time passes immeasurably through the night, as it always does. So when all you feel is a vacuum of cold air rushing in, you aren't sure what time it is. You try to open your eyes... you see him, barely.

But your eyelids hang heavy, and you fall back asleep.

Note: haha get it “barely” I hope this was ok and the warnings+genre were accurate! I didn’t wanna put earlobe nibbling as a warning so lmao. Also I hate small cottages and I’m never taking photos in them again.

If anyone has any advice/feedback I’d actually really love to hear it! Especially about how to make Eivor’s voice feel more accurate, or if the Reader character has too much personality. No pressure though!

[wthtorke]

Insomnia

(I gave in to the pressure lmao The Collector is one of my favorite movies and it’s spooky season so bear with me)

Asa has projects, many projects.

He seeks locations, makes up identities, places, and whatnot, like the secret club in the second movie and his lab in the abandoned hotel.

As he's searching once, very late at night, he finds himself in this street, and besides the streetlamps, there’s only one window light up, not by tv light or a nightlight, just a normal bulb. He'd stare at it for a few seconds, jolting back slightly when a figure walked by the window, before narrowing his eyes slightly.

He takes an interest.

And for the person, that’s never a good sign.

Asa finds out quickly about them, he always does. He didn't search all of his victims, especially when he was pent up and just took it off on someone, as much as he hated doing that, it wasn't planned and that alone bothered him greatly

But this one, he went a step further for this one.

A pharmacy record told him they were anxious, which was probably the cause of the lack of sleep, and while they didn't take heavy medication, it was sure enough to make his interest peak even more.

So he started watching them.

He settled for a nearby project, a simple drug dealing kind of place that would attract as many test subjects one could want.

It wasn't his first choice, not really. But it was closest to his current obsession's place, so of course, he took it. He felt both smug and frustrated when he followed them home, seeing them eye his dealing location with fear, walking faster by it, afraid, dreading it.

While Asa usually basked in watching people's face contort in whatever unpleasant feeling it was, he didn't enjoy it on them, it felt wrong, they weren't supposed to feel that.

He didn't want them to feel that.

That’s when he noticed shit was going downhill.

It had barely been 2 weeks.

Asa could get a lot done in two weeks, sure. But to make him feel (as disgusting as that sounded to him) something in under 2 weeks? He refused to accept it. 

Asa wasn't delusional.

He wasn't crazy.

He noticed he might have been ...over fantasizing them.

They were just a normal someone living in a shitty place, they had trouble sleeping, were naive enough to actually leave the lights on at such time at night, and they probably didn't take the anxiety medicine seriously, or else they wouldn't be so...afraid.

They walked as if the very lamposts plotted against them.

That also made Asa feel something.

Again, not the usual thrill of knowing someone was fearing him or what he might do to them. He just...Didn't want bad things to happen to this one person.

Another sign something was wrong was that Asa was growing impatient.

Asa.

Impatient.

Who would have thought?

Certainly not him.

Asa usually had no trouble being invisible, it was his...job, to be invisible. His majoring and license were like his hobbies. The collection and everything that came with it was his job. The testing, the planning, the execution, the solving of problems, and...improvising.

But he couldn't bear the thought of not existing to this person.

He watched them carefully, he knew exactly what type of victim they'd be. What they'd say when he chased them, what they'd try to plead, what routes they would try to escape on, and especially what they would scream when he stabbed them.

But he didn’t find any excitement in that.

He wondered about the things he didn't know instead.

Things he rarely wondered about, normally.

Asa wondered if they'd sleep better knowing he was there to protect them at night, and if they'd be interested in his collection. His..." normal" one, at first.

If they'd be kind and speak to him in whispers in the morning when they hadn't gotten out of bed yet. If they were affectionate, tactile, or a reserved lover, wondered if they'd moan his name or just kiss him when he-.

Asa had been close, many times to make a move. To approach, talk, or just maybe-.

No, he couldn't.

He couldn't force himself on this one. He couldn’t just kidnap them.

and it frustrated him to no end. Not having his way when having his way was all he lived for.

Asa didn't believe in fate. He made his own fate.

But he was sure speechless when someone ran into him when he was unloading new terrariums from his car.

He was sure he'd murder them when he heard the, oh so -familiar- voice stuttering an apology, reaching quickly to stabilize the fragile containers.

Asa could feel his eyes dilating, his ears perking up like they did when he was hunting someone, damn his hairs were standing on -end-.

"- I'm so sorry, I- fuck, did I break anything? I'm so-, Oh, they're beautiful" they said, looking at the terrariums in Asa's arms, much to his delight. "Again, I'm sorry. My fish would kill me if it found out I made another fish homeless by breaking their stuff" they laughed, nervous. No, anxious, "I have a few mollies."

Asa knew.

"My aquarium looks like this one, actually"

Asa also knew.

"I-, I'm sorry, I'm rambling." They looked down, fingers retreating from the glass, and Asa wanted to scream.

"...They're for...Tarantulas. Not fish" he said instead, his fixation's eyes widening slightly as he did. "Spiders, huh? Wow", they started, and Asa was ready for disappointment.

"You're a brave one" they laughed softly, "I heard some of them are, um, docile?" they said, rubbing their arm up and down as he could tell they were picturing the spiders inside the, now empty, containers.

"..Some, yes," he said and watched his person smile, the corners of Asa's lips turned up slightly, mind whirling with plans with his new muse already.

[angelicmark]

sweet loving (m)

pairing: college!mark x college!reader

genre: fluff, smut, angst, lovers!au

warnings: cursing, unprotected sex (wrap it up!), love making, dry humping, sexual themes, a whole lot of fluff please be warned lmao

wc: 8.1k

summary: being a total opposite from mark, you never imagined you would be able to last a whole year with him. until mark proves you wrong, and you both fall sweetly in love.

oct. 2; day 37

you look at mark, your eyes trailing all over him and his face. he was handsome, and you would sometimes wonder why he even asked you out just barely over a month ago. the relationship was still fresh, and the two of you were still getting to know each other. it was a nice feeling, and you actually quite enjoyed being around him. he was cute, the way he would laugh at almost anything and sometimes slap his knee when he did laugh. it was endearing, you found him endearing.

“you okay?” he asks when he catches you staring for too long, going to take a bite out of his muffin. the two of you were at his apartment, eating at the breakfast bar. it was a peaceful morning, and also the first time spending the night together as boyfriend and girlfriend, as an official couple. you were nervous at first, but as the night unveiled, you were more at ease with him.

“yeah, just thinking,” you softly smile at him, taking a bite out of your cereal. you were a bit on the quieter side while he was more outgoing and courageous. you wouldn’t call yourself a nerd, just dedicated and knowing what you wanted in life. not that mark wasn’t, he was just less uptight about his studying, not in the slightest worried when he got a couple failed grades here and there.

“what about?” he takes a sip of his drink, looking at you with big curious eyes. you were both complete opposites, now that you think about it. and you wondered if he even noticed that himself.

you adjust in your seat, looking at him with articulate eyes, “i don’t know,” you breathe, slightly feeling stressed, “i’m just not sure how this even works, to be honest. i’ve never exactly had a serious relationship, and we’re actually really different. have you noticed that?”

he swallows, his demeanor calm while you were still fidgeting in your seat, “well, yeah, i think it’s a bit hard to miss,” he chuckles, “but i don’t think we should worry about it too much. i like you, there’s something about you and your personality that makes me want to be better. i think that’s good, at least.”

you feel as if he knocked the wind right out of you, and it almost felt refreshing being around him. you nod your head, “and you make me feel good. like, better about myself and life in general. it’s less stressful with you around.”

he smiles, “see?” he can’t help from leaning in to give you a soft kiss, looking at you with bright optimistic eyes, “there we go.”

you smile back, unable to give in to his cute gestures, “thank you, for putting me at ease. it’s a bit hard to do that.”

he kisses you again, a lot slower and more reassuring, “always.”

oct. 31; day 66

“it’s halloween, baby!” mark cheers, looking at you as he stands there in his spider-man costume. you can’t help the laugh that escapes passed your lips, looking at the way he starts to imitate spider-man’s webs.

you stroll towards him, walking right to him and he can’t help the way his eyes travel all along your figure. you were only just a cat this year, but you were wearing a tightly fitted black dress and the cat ears were really adding to the outfit. you had high-rise boots reaching just above your knees, and he couldn’t stop himself from looking at your legs, seeing the way everything wrapped around you like a glove. you were so beautiful, he decided. really beautiful.

he swallows, “you look good, really good.” his eyes ate you up hungrily, and you caught the way his eyes darkened just a bit.

you avoid eyes for a few, before looking back at him with a shy look, “so do you, spidey.” you kiss him, and his hands were quick to grasp onto you. he couldn’t seem to keep his hands to himself, not with you walking around like that.

“thanks,” he breathes out when you pull away, looking at your lips like he was about to chase after them again. you could feel your body heating up under his gaze, and you truly did like the feeling he gave you. two months does a lot to a relationship, you think to yourself.

you look at him, his hands still on your waist and holding you incredibly close to him, “you ready to go?”

he nods, taking your hand and finally pulling away. he was close to just saying fuck the party and staying home with you all night long. he so desperately wanted to, but he spent days just trying to convince you to even go with him. he couldn’t let all that begging go to waste. plus, a part of him wanted to let everyone know just who you belonged to. you were his, and his ego was inflated the whole entire night over that thought.

“this is jaehyun,” mark introduces, and he sees the jaehyun smiles at you with bright eyes, “and this is johnny.” the boys were staring at you with pretty smiles, jaehyun being a bit bolder in kissing the back of your hand. your eyes went wide, watching as mark hissed at jaehyun, “back off.”

jaehyun laughs, backing away from you, “i’m not interested, mark. she’s yours, i’m not a woman stealer.”

mark couldn’t help but feel insecure, in a way. jaehyun had killer dimples, and a cute smile. mark felt basic compared to him. but the moment he feels a small, soft hand on his shoulder, he could feel his body starting to loosen up again. mark wasn’t used to feeling jealous or possessive, so when he saw the way jaehyun kissed your hand, he wasn’t exactly sure what to do with these kinds of feelings. but, as his eyes travel to your own, he feels like the weight of the world had been lifted. you were such a calming soul, always so gentle when around him. it was charming, and mark liked that about you.

“sorry,” he sighed, looking at you wide apologetic eyes.

you shake your head, smiling at him, “if my friends were to ever flirt with you, i might have gone crazy. you’re a lot better than me,” you laugh.

he can’t help the smile that reaches his face, “good think i’d never leave you, then.” he places an arm around your shoulder.

you snuggle closer to him, the night turning for the better, “me neither.”

the rest of the night was just soft, loving kisses. the two of you exhausted by the time you made it back to mark’s apartment, cuddling so incredibly close to each other. you were starting to get more and more comfortable around mark, and a part of you was terrified. you were scared you would get too attached, and be left heartbroken. but, as the two of you doze off, holding each other as the two of you start to fall in love together, you felt like it would be worth it.

mark was so worth it.

nov. 29; day 95

thanksgiving holiday was good. you both went home to your parents, and your family was unable to stop talking about this marvelous mark you had. they wished to one day meet him, but you decided it was a bit early to introduce each other to your families. your three months together was spent over the phone, celebrating and sending air kisses with plenty of giggles and wishing the two of you were together. it was always nice talking to mark, but you missed him. you missed being around him in real life, and being able to hold him. a week was way too long without him.

“mark!” you bang on his apartment door, excited to finally see him after all this time. you had arrived home just a few hours later than him, and he waited patiently for you, well, as patiently as he could. he was just as anxious as you, although.

he swings the door open, catching sight of your bright eyes. you jump in his arms, unable to contain your excitement. you were so happy to finally be in his arms again. being around family is always nice, but you missed your boyfriend. you missed kissing him, holding him, being around him. as he lets you in and closes the door with his foot, you kiss him. and he melts into you, tilting his head to deepen the kiss. he missed this, he really missed this.

“missed you,” he lets out between kisses, his voice gravely.

you hum back, your arms reach up and you drag your fingers through his scalp, “missed you, too.”

the two of you are unable to stop kissing, to stop touching each other. it was amazing just how much the two of you could miss each other. he drags you to the couch, expecting you to sit beside him. but, to his surprise, you jump in his lap and continue kissing him like that. it felt so good having you so close, he could feel his heart tightening at the thought of you becoming more and more comfortable around him. it had only been three months together, and he could easily feel himself falling in love with you. it was hard to say you didn’t feel the same way, because you know you did. it was so hard not to love mark.

you pull back for air, and he’s already trailing his kisses down your neck. you can’t help the noises that escape you, your hands clawing through his hair. he loved the pressure your nails put on his scalp, and he couldn’t help from groaning and biting down onto your neck. you let out a small gasp, and he tugs you closer to his chest. the both of you were breathing heavily when he pulls back to look at you directly in the eyes. your body felt like it was burning, and you knew he could feel the heat because his hands trailed up your shirt on your hips. his hands were cold against your hot skin, and you were unsure if you could wait any longer for him to finally touch you.

“mark,” you say, making direct eye contact as you both watch one another’s every move, “do- do you want to...” you trail off, hoping he got the message. you felt embarrassed, avoiding his eyes for a minute before looking back at him again. he had a goofy nervous smile on his face.

“i would love to,” he whispers, leaning in to kiss you again. he was stealing the air right out of your lungs, you felt like you were drowning in an ocean of mark. and it was so intoxicating. everything about mark was intoxicating, so captivating you were afraid of losing yourself to him. but, as the two of you ended up tangled in his sheets by the end of the night, you think to yourself that maybe it would be worth it. he was such a sweet, kind soul. he thought of you and you only, your hands intertwined the whole entire time. it felt like you were dreaming, and he had to bring you back to reality with each kiss.

mark was starting to feel like home.

dec. 31; day 127

you were expecting mark to want to go out on new year’s, even offering to go with him if he wanted. but he ended up smiling and shaking his head no, claiming he would like to spend this moment alone with you, and you only. it made your heart flutter, and you began to wonder what went through that cute boy’s head sometimes.

“alright,” he passes you non-alcoholic champagne, and you let out a little chuckle as he plops down beside you on the couch.

“why non-alcoholic?” you laugh, and he pouts a bit before seeing your smile and perking right back up. your smile was too contagious to not smile back.

“it was all they had at the store,” he mumbles, “and i didn’t feel like driving across town for real champagne. truly wasn’t worth it,” he shakes his head.

you nod back, kissing his cheek, “thank you.”

he looks at you, his cheeks starting to heat up as he nods back, “of course, baby.”

you smile softly at the name, every time it fell from his lips, it sounded so cute. and you could never stop the smile that would form. he seemed to notice, because he leaned over and kissed you shortly. when he pulled back from the soft kiss, he stared at you before leaning back in, the kiss a lot slower and more passionate than the last. it always felt nice kissing mark, his lips always soft and tasting like coconut lip balm. it was endearing, to say the least. you could tell he puts a lot of effort into looking good and smelling good for you, but you wouldn’t care if he simply just wore sweats and had no lip balm on. he was still your mark, still the same goof you were falling so easily for. he will always be the mark you’re starting to love more and more along the way.

“3,” he hears this, pulling away from your lips to look at the screen, “2!” he looks at you smiling as he places his hand along your cheek and leaning back in, “1!” he closes his eyes, “happy new years!” kiss. kiss after kiss after kiss as you hear fireworks going off in the background. but you can’t find it in yourself to care as mark pulls you into his lap. this was comfortable, such easy access to kiss him just the way you want.

he pulls back, looking at you with big bright wide eyes, and you swear you could see the stars in his eyes. he looked like he was thinking so deeply, and you were wondering just what it was. he was such a curious boy, but you knew he was ambitious, never ending when it comes to getting what he wanted. it’s why he kept chasing after you all that time. and you were so glad you finally agreed to date him. mark was such a gift, being nothing but the best boyfriend you could ever ask for. this was the first serious relationship you had been in, and he was the perfect fit for you. he had to be.

“i love you, y/n,” he says, his eyes glossy.

you freeze in your spot, looking at him for what felt like years. he could feel his heart beating right out of his chest. maybe it’s too soon? did he just fuck up? he was overthinking, he couldn’t help it. did you not love him back? did you-

you smile, “i love you, too, mark.”

he breathes out a sigh of relief, and you laugh a bit, “holy fuck,” he says, “i got so nervous right there.”

you laugh again, “sorry, i just love messing with you. your scared face is too cute,” you kiss his cheek.

he steals a real kiss after that, repeating those same three words over and over again the whole entire night. this was heaven, this was what being happy truly was, you were his first love. and he was yours. this was love, in so many different ways.

you were his home. and he was yours.

jan. 26; day 153

“happy five months!” mark busts through your bedroom door, and you roll over on your bed to see him holding up balloons and some flowers and chocolates. you snort at him, seeing the way he’s all dressed up and smiling so dorkishly.

“it’s 9am, mark,” you laugh, sitting up and yawning. he places the things down, walking towards you and climbing in front of you. he goes for a kiss, but you lean away and shove your hand in his face, “i have morning breath.”

he pouts, pushing your hand away, “i don’t care. i want to kiss you.”

you roll your eyes, giving him a peck before jumping out of bed and seeing the way he pouts like a child, “y/nnn..”

you laugh, “i’ll be five minutes, mark. just let me brush my teeth.”

when you come out of the bathroom, he’s laying all across your bed. he looked really good, his black jeans and fitted black shirt looking impeccably good on him. he always looked good, but for some reason he looked extra good. he had his hat on backwards, and it was attractive to say the least. he catches you staring, smiling at you when he notices you standing there.

“hi, baby,” he sits up on the edge of the bed. you smile at him, boldly sitting right into his lap. his hands instinctively rest on your hips, “i love you.”

you smile, kissing him properly, “i love you, too, mark.” you kiss along his jaw, “so much.” your breath was hot against his skin, and you were so pretty, so good to him. “happy five months.” you lean back and see that he’s smiling again.

“i’m lucky to have you,” he says to you, his hands roaming all along your body. but his touches had no alternative intentions, and you couldn’t help from smiling along with him. he was such a good boyfriend.

“me too, mark,” you whisper back, looking him right in the eyes, “i didn’t imagine us making it this far, but i’m so happy we did. you’re so good to me, and i can’t thank you enough for loving me.”

he smiles, “thank you for loving me, y/n.” he kisses you, and you melt into him. you were so used to kissing mark, it felt like you were made just for kissing him, but each and every time still never failed to make you crumble. it was a blessing to be able to kiss mark, and to be able to call him your boyfriend. he felt the same exact way about you, pride constantly filling up each and every time someone saw that you were his, and his only. you will always be his, he’ll make sure of it.

mark was a dream boy, your dream boy. so perfect in every single way. “i love you so much, mark.” you whisper against his lips.

he looks you in the eye, “i love you so much, too, y/n.”

tears start to well in your eyes, and you can’t help but wonder if he’ll end up leaving you one day. mark could probably find someone a lot better than you in every way imaginable, you can’t help but wonder why he constantly chooses you over everyone else. but you’re not complaining. not in the slightest. as long as you had mark, you didn’t have time to worry about those things. you were lucky enough to love him in the first place, and you knew this.

you run your fingers through his soft hair, and he leans his head into your soft touch, “i may not be able to give you everything you need all the time,” you say, your voice barely above a whisper, “but i will remind you every day of my life that i love you.”

he looks at you with a soft smile stretched on his perfectly shaped lips, “me too, baby. always.”

you lean to kiss him again, “always.”

feb. 14; day 172 

“mark, it’s jaehyun’s birthday,” you pout. mark was being stubborn, he didn’t want to go out for his birthday, wanting to stay with you and spend valentine’s day with you only. he was afraid jaehyun would get too friendly with you again, insecurity starting to bubble up again. “we have to at least go and wish him happy birthday.”

“he doesn’t deserve one after last time i saw him,” he mumbles, avoiding eye contact with you. you heard him despite him looking away from you, it was hard to miss the jealousy dripping from his voice.

“mark,” you sit down next to him on the couch, looking him in the eyes. you brush some of his hair out of his face as he stares at you, “there isn’t anyone on this earth that could steal me away from you.”

he sighs, “i know,” he pauses, looking away, “i guess i’m just..” he takes a breath as he stops again. he looked as if he was struggling getting the words out. “i just don’t want to lose you, or feel like i could. i’m not used to feeling like this.” he shifts in his seat and avoids eye contact. he couldn’t bring himself to look you in the eye.

you smile to yourself, making him face you again, “me neither, mark. but you have to trust me when i say i love you, and only you.”

his eyes were getting glossy the longer he stared, “i trust you.”

“and i trust you, mark. there’s no taking me away.”

he felt as if a whole weight had been lifted. he knew he couldn’t help the jealousy that would bubble up, but you were his. and he needed to realize that no one would ever take you away from him. he wasn’t sure why he was so possessive in the first place, but you always seemed to reassure no matter what. and he was grateful for you. he was especially grateful that you weren’t creeped out by it, or thought he was being weird and over reacting. he was lucky, and he didn’t want anyone else to have you this way.

“thank you,” he breathes out, leaning over and giving you a kiss. you kiss back, and you could feel everything falling in to place all over again. life seemed to be a lot easier with mark around. it was as if time was flying, but in the best way possible. it was always like that with mark, and you know that will never change.

“let’s get going then,” you say, smiling as you pull away and stand up. you offer a hand to him, and he takes it as he gets up. “you can stick by me like glue if you want.”

he laughs at that, “i just might.”

the whole night was congratulating jaehyun on another year, and mark constantly having an arm around you. it was comforting, and you could tell mark was more at ease now. you were happy he was feeling better. every now and then he would give you a quick peck, smiling down at you. he looked pretty under all the lights. he even looked pretty in the dark with just the moonlight shining on him. mark was so incredible. and as the night came to an end, you were holding onto each other tightly.

he whispered into your ear just how much he loved you, and you would say it back as the two of you doze off to sleep. there was no describing the feeling he gave you.

mar. 22; day 209

the air was thick, you felt like you were suffocating. mark’s hips were working so deliciously, shoving his cock inside you and out over and over again. he was always so good with his hips, you felt like you were going to pass out. you were a moaning, writhing mess. and he, personally, loved it. you were so easy please around him, and he loved the noises you made each time the head of his cock teased right against your sweet spot. you were so beautiful.

“so good,” he mumbles, his hands intertwining with yours. he held your hands above your head, your fingers locking together. mark was a love maker, he showed you just how much he cared each and every time. it was pure, sweet bliss being with him. “so tight, baby.”

you whined in his hold, your back arching as you looked right into his dark colored eyes. he was so beautiful up close. you were amazed how you even got him. “you’re so good, mark,” you gasp, “so fucking good.”

he chuckles, leaning down to press his lips to yours, “all for you.” he emphasizes his words by thrusting deeper and faster. he reaches a hand down to start rubbing at your clit, feeling the way your walls would start to flutter around his throbbing dick. it felt so good. his other hand stayed connected with yours, and you were grateful for it. your other hand, however, was clawing all along his back. you were holding on for dear life, wanting so desperately to cum for him.

“fuck, mark,” you choke out, feeling as you start to come undone around him, “oh god, so good. so, so good.” your whines edged him on, and soon enough you were cumming around him sweetly, his name being repeated over and over again until all you could remember was mark, mark, mark. it was always mark. never not him.

“such a good girl,” you hear his whisper as he cums right after you, filling you up so well. you rarely let him cum inside, so this was a treat for him. your were slick as he came, feeling his body shudder against yours as you whine for him all through it. “i love you.” he kisses you softly.

you return the kiss, in a trance, “i love you so much.”

he smiles at you, admiring the way you look. you were always such a sight to see. he loved you so much, he was afraid of losing you.

april 17; day 235

you were going to cry. you were convinced you were going to cry. you never cried, or rather showed much emotion, but this very moment, all you could think about was breaking down. nothing was right. nothing was ever right. why did you even do this? why did you even agree to be with mark? what was happening to the two of you?

it was your first fight. your first real fight. and you could feel your world crashing in on you. it was terrifying, and you were scared shitless. you had never experienced this kind of fear. never once in your life had to deal with this kind of stress. mark was your first real relationship, so you weren’t exactly sure what to do. for the first time ever, you were clueless. you wished they had some kind of book written for this. but maybe you shouldn’t wish that, because that’s why you were both fighting in the first place.

“i barely see you anymore,” he sighed, roughly running his fingers through his hair, “it’s like all you can think about is those damn books. and i know you care a lot about studying, but i need you to be my girlfriend sometimes, too.” his eyes were sparkling under the light, and it wasn’t the way he used to look at you. his eyes were filled with tears this time, looking at you with despair and anger.

but, your blood boiled against your own will, “you think i chose this?” you ask, eyes narrowing at him, “you know how important all of this is to me. i need to pass my exams. i need this in order to live a nice easy life. i’m sorry i’m not worried about the next party available.” you scoffed.

he was hurt. his heart was pounding against his chest as he saw another side of you that he had yet to see. it was painful, and he wished to never see it again. he sighed as the two of you sat in an awkward, tense silence. it was eating the two of you alive. but it took forever before either one of you spoke up.

“do you love me?”

the words hit you hard. you felt as if you just got cold water dumped on you. was he really doubting your love for him? was this what the two of you were coming down to? you let out a huff of breath, obviously hurt. but his eyes were serious, and he glanced at the clock beside you, before looking back at you. it was late, you knew this. but you couldn’t let it end like this, you couldn’t have him walk away thinking you don’t love him.

“mark,” you step forward, “there isn’t a day where i don’t.”

he looks away from you, tears now falling freely from his big bright eyes. he was hurting, and you were the cause of it. you felt so terrible. you felt like hell, only wanting to make it up to him at this point. but he was doubting your love for him. how could you two ever go back after that?

“it’s so hard to tell sometimes,” he looks up at you again. his eyes were puffy already, his lips quivering and his nose turning red, “some days, i’m surprised when you say you love me back. other days i’m wondering if you’re lying to me. it’s hard not knowing what you’re thinking.”

mark was always someone who needed that kind of reassurance, and you knew this. you just always forgot to give it to him every single day, the way he deserved. is this what he was really thinking all this time? did mark really have this kind of perspective on you?

“mark, i love you.” you start, reaching a hand out to make him look at you, “i may not be able to express it the way i should most of the time, but that doesn’t mean i don’t love you. because i do. i really do, mark. there isn’t anyone in this world that could make me feel the way you do, and i will stand by that for the rest of my life.” you lean into him as he grasps at your waist, “you were made just for me, i’m sure of it, mark. i love you, a whole lot more than you could ever imagine.”

he was breaking, and you were picking up the pieces one by one. he kisses you, and you could taste the salty tears that were earlier running down his face, but you really couldn’t find it in yourself to care. not when the love of your life was doubting your love for him. the kiss was so slow, soft, unlike anything you’ve ever felt before. it was passionate, no hidden meanings and no rising intentions coming by. it was just you, and mark. no one else.

“i’ll remind you forever, mark,” you whisper against his lips, “i love you, forever.”

may 14; day 262

three days. it’s been three whole days since mark last texted you. and, honestly, you were starting to get tired. you’ve been trying to reach out to him, but nothing seemed to work. today, though, you finally decided to drive your ass over there and see why the hell he was ignoring you in the first place. could he still be stuck on your last fight? was that why he was ignoring you? you were starting to get drained from everything, not realizing how hard it really was holding together a relationship.

you don’t even bother knocking on the door, helping yourself in with the key he gave you a couple months ago. the minute you walk in, you could feel the air was cold. how the hell could he live in such a cold temperature? you were starting to doubt he was even here by how cold and lonely it felt. it was quiet, no sign of life from the looks of it. but you make your way towards his door anyway. you see it slightly open, and you push it softly to expose the area.

there he was. sitting on his bed, facing away from the door and looking out of the window. but you doubted he found the tree in front of him interesting. you stepped inside the room, careful not to disturb him. you needed to know why he was ignoring you, though. so you timidly sat by him. he could feel your presence the minute you opened the door, but refused to move or say anything. you both sat in silence. the sound of breathing starting to become louder and louder in your ears. you felt as if you were being tortured with his silence.

“mark,” you say softly, your voice cracking in the loud silence. he sat still, not even exchanging you a look. his jaw was tightened, and you could see the way his fingers were tightly grasping each other. it was a painful, deafening silence that was being released into the air.

he sighed, closing his eyes as yours stayed glued in on him. he finally says something, your heart suffocating at the sight of his soft stubble he had yet to shave, “i’m sorry for ghosting you.” it was a quiet apology.

you look away from him, looking at the tree, “it’s fine.”

he opened his eyes finally to look at you for the first time that night. for the first time in three days. and you were still as beautiful as ever. you had a glow on your face as the moonlight struck you in all kinds of different ways. it was stunning, you were always stunning. he could feel tears prickling in the corners of his eyes, you would always be too good for him. he always believed that. even when he didn’t know how to treat you half the time, you were still there to pick him right back up. even when he decided to run away from his emotions rather than sort them out, you would always come right to him. even when ignored you for three whole days, you would still come and check in on him, no questions truly asked. a pain struck him right through the heart the longer he looked at you.

“why do you always come back?” he huffs, and this makes you whip your head in his direction. “i mean.. i can’t be good for you. you will always be more-”

“i’m not more of anything, mark.” you say to him, your voice leveled, while his was shaking. “my heart hasn’t changed. not for you. you’re my boyfriend, someone i love like no one else. there hasn’t been anyone like you. i don’t want you doubting yourself just because i’m a bit more stern than you. you’re allowed to be messy, mark. i love you. stop thinking you aren’t good enough for me. you’re more than that.”

he cried. the whole entire night, he was curled in your arms as you held him while he cried and sobbed into your soft shirt. you could feel his tears trailing along your arm, but you could care less. the hold he had on you was tight, and it was starting to feel like he was afraid you were going to poof right out of his grip. your fingers stayed in his hair, tangled around the soft strands as you soothed him. eventually, you dragged the both of you under the covers of the bed and he was soon lulled to sleep, his arms grasping tightly around your waist while yours were still coaxing him in a soft, loving hug. mark had a lot of doubts, a lot of stress on his shoulders. and he was afraid of showing it, but he felt like he could around you. and it was such a blessing having you by his side.

“i love you, mark,” you kiss the top of his forehead as his puffy eyes shut and his swollen lips started to pout in a deep sleep. “you’re worth so much to me.”

and you really did mean it.

june 23; day 302

“mark!” you squeal as he tickles along your sides. you were starting to lose your breath, but he just couldn’t help himself. your laugh was so luxurious in his eyes, and your smile was so pretty. “stop! oh my g- god!” you laugh out loud, trying to break free from his arms.

he finally pulls back, grinning at you wildly, “you’re so cute, y/n.” he kisses you, his mood changing significantly. you wanted to be mad at him, but with the way his lips were tightly pressed against yours, you couldn’t find it in yourself to be completely angry. when he pulled away, he had a look of love written on his features. it was endearing, and you couldn’t help the smile that tugged at your lips. he was so pretty up close.

“where do you think we’ll be in ten years?” he says, easily flopping on top of you. you let out a huff because his strong weight, but nonetheless started to run your fingers through his hair as he looked up at you like a cat in love.

you chuckle, “together.” you say simply, and heat seemed to have rose onto his cheeks because he looked away briefly before making eye contact again. his cheeks were painted pink.

“you think so?” he asks, leaning into the touch of your hand.

“yeah,” you breathe, “i really do. do you?”

he nods his head, “always.”

you smile at him, and he could feel the winds knocking him right out the longer he looked at you. you always seemed to have a hold on him that he wasn’t even aware of. he felt like he could be with you forever. he knew he could. anywhere you went, he would follow. no doubt about it.

“it’s hot outside,” you look out the window in his bedroom, seeing the way the sun was blazing in the room. he had his ac as low as it could go, but nothing seemed to be enough.

he nodded in agreement, getting up off of you to let you breathe, “yeah, wanna get ice cream?” his eyes lit up as he mentioned ice cream, and you laughed as you quickly nodded your head, getting up off the bed to join him in getting up.

“lead the way, my prince,” you your arms out in front of you, bowing at him and he couldn’t help the laugh that slipped past his lips. you smiled up at him as you straightened.

he ruffles your hair, “will do, my princess.”

he catches the way you got shy at the nickname.

july 18; day 327

“can you believe it’s been almost a year since we got together?” mark asks, watching as you eat your food in front of him. you cooked each other dinner tonight, him helping in the minor things as you took over. you loved the boy, but he really didn’t know how to cook.

you swallow, “i know, it feels like time really passed by too quickly,” you pout, taking a sip of your drink.

“it’s been the best year ever,” he says moreso to himself, but you hear it anyway and you can’t stop the smile that raises along your cheeks. he notices and he smiles right back, his nose scrunching up.

“for a boy who hates cheesy things, you sure are cheesy,” you lean your head on your hand, looking at him with a raised eyebrow.

he chuckles at your expression while taking a bite of his food, “yeah, that was until you came into my life. everything just turned cheesy.”

you roll your eyes, yet you were still smiling, “dork.”

he shrugs his shoulder, “and you’re the one dating the dork.”

you narrow your eyes, before smirking and getting up from your seat, coming towards his. he sips on his water, curious on what you were doing. you were quick to sit on his lap, making him almost choke on the liquid in his throat. he looked nervous, but his hands were quick to grab onto your hips. he was surprised, but it was still pleasantly. you rolled your hips into his, watching as his eyes flutter shut and you feel his fingernails starting to dig into your flesh. you were wearing shorts and a tanktop, perfect easy access for everything.

“fuck,” he huffs out, his head resting against your shoulder. your hips were relentless, and he was getting harder and harder with every movement. you could feel his dick through his sweatpants, and it was rubbing deliciously against your clit. his hands roamed your body as he started to suck on your neck messily. you were so wet, and you knew you had to be soaking through your shorts at this point.

“you’re so hard, mark,” you let out, craining your neck for him to have more access.

“and you’re so wet,” he groans, feeling as your hips swiveled in circles before picking up pace. it felt so damn good. “you wanna cum in your pants, baby?”

“do you?” you retort, grinding heavily against him. the air was thick, and you felt like you could burst at any second now. he laughs against your neck, before gripping your hips and helping you guide along his dick easily through your clothes. it felt so good, and you were so close. he could tell with the way your fingers were starting to dig into his shoulders and your moans were getting more and more loud. you were unintentionally vocal, but it always seemed to please him either way.

“such a dirty girl,” he whispers, one of his hands traveling up your back and along your spine through your shirt. you arch into him and he groans. “so close,” he mumbles, licking along your neck.

“fuck, mark,” you moan, “me too, so close. gonna cum in my cute little shorts for you.”

his eyes went wide, not used to the way you were talking so dirty. it wasn’t like you, but he wasn’t complaining. not in the slightest. he moans with you, “come on, baby. cum in those cute little shorts of yours like you said. make yourself cum without my dick even being in you. such a naughty girl,” he hums in your ear.

“oh fuck!” you fall foward onto him, your hips faltering in pace as you cum. it was such a euphoric feeling when it came to mark, so much better than when you did it alone. you were chanting his name, and soon enough he was cumming with you. he stains his sweatpants and boxers, some leaking through and onto your shorts. you could feel his dick twitching below you as you both settled down, your breathing heavy.

“so good,” he rubs your back, watching as your body slumps into his. “let’s go get cleaned, baby. we’ll wash the dishes later.” he kisses your temple as you softly nod your head. “perfect.”

august 2; day 342

“happy birthday, mark!” you scream as you rush towards his room. you had been saying happy birthday to him every single hour, texting him while you were out getting cake and his favorite foods. he said he preferred staying in with you for the day, and you only pouted and agreed to his wishes. whatever he wanted today, he would get. a lot of people seemed to wish him happy birthday, and he only thanked them with a small smiley face.

he smiled at you, happy to finally see you, “baby! thank you,” he laughs, “but you’ve been telling me all day long.” he kisses you sweetly, and you can’t help the smile that stretches along your face.

“you only deserve the best,” you pull his face into yours again, and he sighs sweetly against your lips. he tasted like mint, while you tastes like watermelon. you wore his favorite chapstick.

“i love you,” he whispers against your lips, arms greedily wrapping around you.

“i love you more,” you mumble back. before it gets too far, you push him back and show him the cake you bought. “look! i got you a spiderman cake!”

he laughs out loud, “from halloween?”

“yeah,” you smile back, “i think halloween was around the time when i really started to fall for you, so i bought you a spiderman cake for your birthday to kind of relive that moment.”

he smiles at you before quickly picking you up and twirling you around a couple of times. he laughs at the squeaks you let out, demanding he put you down. “i love you so fucking much,” he says as he places you down, “i don’t know how i ever got this lucky.”

your cheeks feel hot as you look up at him, “i love you, too, mark.” you kiss his cheek, and he smiles at the tender action. “now, let’s eat your cake, birthday boy.”

the rest of the day was filled with laughter, talks of the future, and slow, loving sex as he discovered the sweet dark lace beneath your clothes. everything felt like heaven with him, and you were so in love with this boy. no one compares to him, you decided.

“happy birthday, mark,” you moan in his ear as his hips work fluidly with yours. you say atop him, riding him sweetly, “i love you.”

he kisses you messily, his dick trapped between your heat and his head swimming in thoughts of you, and you alone, “i love you, too, baby.” he groans, his fingers digging into your back as he trails them down and leaves scratching marks, “so much.”

this was heaven, and you weren’t planning on leaving anytime soon.

august 26; day 366

one year.

a whole entire year of loving mark lee.

and, in all honesty, you were overwhelmed. how could you have spent that much time with someone, every single day for a year? it was insane in your eyes, but you truly couldn’t see yourself with anyone else. you wouldn’t want to have it any other way. not when mark was, quite literally, your dream boy. loving him for a whole year feels surreal, and you really weren’t complaining.

“happy one year,” you breathe, leaning in for a kiss. you both stood on the balcony of his apartment, the warm summer night air flowing through your hair. it just turned midnight, and you can’t help the smile that spread across your face as you watched it turn midnight.

“happy one year, baby,” he bites his bottom lip, “this is crazy.”

you laugh, “it is, but i wouldn’t want it any other way,” you lean into his grip, “we’ve had our moments, but i truly think it has made us a whole lot stronger as a couple.” you look deeply into his eyes, “i love you, mark lee. there will never be a day where i don’t, and there will never be a day where i stop thinking of you. you will forever be the boy i love, the boy i truly fell in love with. i can never thank you enough for showing me the love i thought i’d never get, or even be able to reciprocate. i hope i make you as happy as you make me, mark.”

tears form in his eyes as he pouts, “you do, y/n. i want no one else but you, and i will keep saying that for the rest of my life. i love you, so damn much it hurts. i can’t imagine my life without you, y/n. i have never loved someone as much as i have loved you, and i can truly say that,” he kisses you softly, “you are forever mine, and i am forever yours.”

you smile against his lips, running your fingers through his hair. this, this was love. this was what being loved, and being in love felt like. the pain, the heartbreak, the aching. all of it was worth it, as long as it was with mark. everything was worth it, as long as it was with mark lee. and no matter where life took the both of you, you swore you would always love him. through thick and thin, you would love him.

“move in with me,” he hushes, breaking apart from your lips briefly.

you smile and only nod your head, “i basically live here, anyway.” he was expecting a bigger, more dramatic reaction, but he could only laugh and sweetly kiss you again. he was living in a world that smelled like watermelon and roses around you, and he loved it.

“i love you forever.”

“and ever,” you whisper back.

now that i know the soft magic of your laugh and how your body moves like art, why would i ever go back? what was before you?

a/n: I’m aware this includes leap year, please don’t judge haha i based it off of 2020

[surprisegents]

tagged by @teatraysandtypewriters​. thank you!! this was pretty fun ngl

1. Name: nervous laughter

2: Gender: guy.. person. yeah

3. Star sign: virgo

4. Height: 5′10"

5. Time: 7:48 pm

6. Birthday: september

7. Favorite band(s): this changes All The Time b/c i tend to like individual songs more than bands but uh. lord huron, walk the moon, of monsters and men, aeseaes, florence + the machine

8. Favorite solo artist(s): you all know who this is. it's hozier. but also mika and charlene kaye and like. so many others

9. Song stuck in my head: never give up on me by misterwives and meet me in the woods by lord huron

10. Last Movie: prospect - which was a weird film but i ended up enjoying it by the end? cool worldbuilding and i really came to love cee and ezra, though i did have to mute and fast forward through the arm scene euughghhghhhh

11. Last show: the clone wars. FINALLY starting it and i get the clone love now

12. When did you make this account: oh it was right before m*gicians was popping off. i've been here on and off since probably, damn, 2011 though?

13. What do I post: the long-lasting hyperfixations lmao. the short ones get sideblogs. right now it's a lot of star wars, art/photography, stuff that makes me laugh, and cr when i get nostalgic

14. What is the last thing you googled: bookoutlet - a canadian clearance book shop

15. Other blogs: a rarely updated star trek one @tenbackward​. a good vibes one that i'd rather keep private because right now it's containing my embarrassing blogging about p*dro p*scal's filmography. and of course, most of you know me from my m*gicians blog @eliotsvests​ rip

16. Do I get asks: rarely. mostly the occasional ask meme or lost, kindly anon

17. Why did I choose this url: i had it saved on my old cr account. had to take a break b/c of a rough situation with a mutual, and when i remade i wanted to keep something from the old blog. plus i think it works whether or not you know the cr reference

18. Following: 513. i gotta clear some out

19. Followers: 157 here. 704 including the sideblogs

20. Average hours of sleep: 😬

21. Lucky number: my answer to this was always 15 & 21 but they were just old jersey numbers

22. Instruments: piano for a few years as a kid, flute for 6 years through school, and i used to dabble in learning guitar before constant hand sanitizer use at work Destroyed my hands

23. What am I wearing: grey overwatch hoodie and maroon joggers

24. Dream job: damn idk. travel writer? someone give me money to go pretty places, learn other languages, and wax poetic about it

25. Dream trip: literally anywhere that isn't the us. maybe ireland or japan? i'd like to see more of canada too, like british columbia or the east coast. though i'd honestly kill to just sit in a library or coffee shop right now

26. Favorite food: man i love good sushi

27. Nationality: canadian

28. Favorite song: changes CONSTANTLY. almost (sweet music) by hozier has been a fave since it came out though

29. Last book I read: still working on it but the thread that binds by cedar mccloud. it's indie, has magical nonbinary librarians, and is set in a nb society where most people use ey/em pronouns if that floats anyone's boat

30. Top three fictional universes I would like to live in: star wars (preferably not during the height of space fascism), harry potter i guess, and.... i honestly can't think of any other universe i wouldn't immediately die in so. west wing. aka the alternate timeline where bartlet & santos were the 00s american presidents

(if you want to no pressure) i’m gonna tag @maliro-t @delunesnumberonefan​ @impossibletruths​ @crossroadsghost​ @allthethingamabobs​ @regina-cordium and @girlturnedgamer​. if anyone else wants to please just go ahead and say i tagged you!

[darlinvandijk]

Not Ready pt. 2

Concept: a request for another part to not ready, but this time they actually have their first time together but all soft and awkward. Dm me and whatnot for a request/idea and I’ll be happy to comply! (Sorry if this is long lmao) also WARNING this will contain like sexual insinuations but there will be no actual smut Hope you enjoy :)

Today we’re in Paris, since Ruel has a show here in a couple days, but for now we have the next 3 days to sight see and spend our time the way choose. Nate scheduled everything to make sure Ruel has a small break, since he’s been under stress from the nonstop traveling and performing. We know he’s happy and loves what he does, but he still needs to let himself rest and take time for himself.

“BABY LOOK” He shouts, causing me to whip my head in his direction, startled by his yell. I instantly roll my eyes as I look at him, seeing him pointing at a bag of gourmet Cheetos. He stares at me with a pleading look in his eyes, practically one second away from dropping on his knees to beg for them. I let out a sigh before making my way into the shop, knowing he won’t quit the dramatics until he gets them.

“Have I ever told you just how much I love you? Because I really fucking love you” he whispers in my ear, leaving a small kiss where his lips just so happened to brush. I blush and lean over to give him a small peck, not wanting to kiss him too much and get Cheeto dust on my lips. He instantly pulls my into a hug, with his arms wrapped around me, but making sure to not crush the Cheetos and not get his orange fingers all over me.

“I love you too bubs” I mumble back to him, my voice coming out muffled from the way my face is shoved into his chest.

He finishes his snack and finds a restroom to wash his hands in, claiming that he needs them clean or I won’t let him touch me. I laugh as he makes his way into the restroom, knowing he was right about me not wanting to let him touch me with his gross orange fingers. He makes his way back out and immediately intertwines our fingers, bringing the back of my hand up to press a light kiss.

We make our way back to the hotel, since it’s nearing dinner time, and neither of us feel like walking around much longer since we’ve been out since 9 this morning. We walk in a peaceful silence, watching the hustle and bustle of the city, staring in awe at the beauty of it and it’s people. We start to get closer to the hotel when he stops and stares at something, I turn my head to see what he’s looking at, only to be left with a light blush at what it is.

“Ruel fucking stop” I hiss out, hoping people don’t notice the direction our eyes are pointing at. He snaps his head back to me with a blush coating his cheeks, running a hand through his hair before ultimately letting it rub the back of his neck in embarrassment.

“Sorry, but can you blame me? You’d look really good in that though” he says, whispering the last bit to me so that those around us can’t hear. His eyes still trained on the lingerie set in the stores window that we just so happened to be passing by.

“Shhh someone might hear you!” I say with my face turning red at his blunt statement, watching him smirk at me because I gave the exact reaction he wanted. He tugs my hand towards the shop with a teasing look on his face, causing me to glare and pull his body back to mine. He lets out a laugh before giving me a kiss on the side of my head, slowly tugging me back to the hotel.

I follow after him, our hands still entwined, and a red blush covering my face. It’s not that I wouldn’t want to wear something like that for him, it’s more of that’s something you’d wear when you’re going to actually sleep together. We haven’t gone all the way yet, definitely tried more things and learned about each other’s bodies, but I just still haven’t been ready for the full experience yet.

We make it to our hotel room in silence, him just looking around and watching all the people, whereas I’m thinking about whether or not I’m truly ready. As I watch him open the door and look at me with a small boyish grin, I realize that I’m actually ready to truly give myself to the boy I love. We make it into the room and he immediately goes to the suitcases and pulls out a hoodie for me and a pair of sweats for him. We both change right there, with me noticing the way his eyes sweep over my body, causing me to get a slightly excited but nervous feeling.

“What should we watch?” He mumbles out, scrolling through the guide on the tv once we both get comfortable on the bed. I glance at it before giving a small shrug as I lay with my head on his chest and our legs twisted together. He lets out a chuckle and lets one hand rest on my lower back as he scrolls before finally finding a movie.

“What’d you put on?” I whisper, playing with the drawstrings on his sweats, feeling him tense up when my fingers brushed his lower abdomen. He watches me with a perplexed look before giving me a small smirk.

“Are you making moves on me?” He laughs out, causing me to blush and move so that I can bury my face into his neck where he can’t see it. I feel his body shake as he laughs, before he slowly sobers up and puts both of his hands on my back, slowly sliding them down until they rest on the back of my upper thighs, touching the bare skin that the hoodie isn’t covering. Before I can even reply, his hands slide up the hoodie, resting on my underwear clad ass, leaving me a blushing nervous mess, also freaking out about the fact that I’m wearing underwear with smiley faces on them.

“If you are, then don’t stop. I definitely don’t mind letting my beautiful girlfriend seduce me” He says into my ear with a cheeky grin slowly taking over his face. I let out a gasp as he grips my ass and sits up, having me straddle him as stare at each other, only a few inches apart. Noticing that he also seems to be a little nervous, from the way his hands are trembling.

“I want to say something but I don’t know how to say it” I mumble, nervous about what might happen, and then embarrassed to even ask. Ruel notices my awkward and shy demeanor and gives me a soft smile before leaning in and giving me a kiss.

“I won’t judge you baby, I’m all ears” He says leaning his forehead against mine, with the softest look he could possibly give me. Seeing the look on his face makes me turn to complete mush since he’s the most caring and gentle boy I’ve ever met.

“I don’t know I just kinda want to do something, like you know” I mumble out awkwardly hoping he catches on to what I’m saying. He gives me a confused stare and slightly tilts his head to the side, trying to read me and see what it is that I want, but turning up blank.

“Well what is it?” He gets out bluntly before I crash our lips together, causing him to fall back in surprise at the force of it. He instantly kisses back and lets one hand rest on my waist, while the other softly holds the back of my neck, I clumsily push my hips down to grind against him, feeling him tense up before he pulls away.

“B-baby what’re you doing?” He stutters out, shocked by how bold my action was. I instantly clam up thinking I did something wrong, and that he didn’t want what I wanted. He notices the sudden change on my face and instantly cradles my face before pressing soft kisses all over it.

“Wait, I didn’t mean it like that. I just meant that I need to know what you want, since I don’t want to assume and pressure you into something, that’s all.” He explains, leaving a soft kiss on the tip of my nose, softly rubbing circles into the bare skin of my waist, since he slipped his hands back under the hoodie again. I stare down at my hands that rest against his bare chest, praying for the ground to swallow me up from how awkward I feel.

“I uhm want you” I mumble out, my face instantly heating up and scrunching from how embarrassed I felt. Ruel immediately freezes and stares at me with a blush coating his cheeks and wide round eyes. I make a move to get off of him when he tightens his hold on me and sends me a shy smile.

“I need you to be clear with me on what you want princess, I don’t want to assume and make you do something you’ll regret.” He says with nothing but pure love on his face, with a hint of nervousness in his eyes. I tense up knowing what he wants me to say, but feeling scared about having to be so bold about it.

“I know I told you that I’m not ready for that, but it’s been a couple months now.. I uhm feel more comfortable about it and I guess what I’m trying to say is that I’d like to uh you know like sleep with you?” I mumble out, cringing after every couple of words, before ending it like a question since I don’t know how to initiate something so intimate. He looks up at me with a shy look on his face before leaning up and giving me a light kiss before placing little kisses all over my face.

“Heyy don’t be getting awkward with me now, I’m happy that you’re being open with me about what you want. Are you sure you’re ready? Because baby we don’t have to rush into this” he says with concern, feeling nervous that he’s pressuring me into wanting this. I give him a nod and lean down to kiss him when he stops me and gives me a little smirk.

“As much as I’d like to start, I need you to say it verbally for me darlin, I need to hear it from you to make sure you want this.” He says softly, knowing I’m already feeling jittery about having to be so open emotionally. I give a soft nod in return before taking a deep breath in.

“Yes, I want to have sex? I don’t know what to say like uhm I want to sleep with you? I don’t know I feel like sex is a strong word like uhm” I start to ramble from the nerves of the situation before Ruel cuts me off with a laugh. I freeze upon hearing his chuckles, staring at him with doe like eyes.

“Baby calm down, that was all I needed to hear, and it’s not a strong word since it is what we’re going to do.” He whispers into my ear with a smirk, causing me to turn my head away with a bright blush. He instantly turns my head back to his, making me look into his green eyes, that are way darker than normal.

“I’m nervous” I mumble out, when he leans in to kiss me, he pulls back a little and gives me the softest smile he can. He brushes a strand of hair behind me ear before leaning forward and giving my forehead a small kiss.

“Honestly uhm I’m nervous too, but we can like be nervous together” He mutters with a boyish but charming smile, as a small blush causes his cheeks and ears to heat up. I give a little grin back before leaning in, and finally giving myself to the love of my life.

Limbs tangle together, hands awkwardly fumble to find places to rest and grab, teeth clash against each other in rushed kisses, jerky awkward movements are made, but most importantly a deeper intimate connection is made with my soulmate.

We lay there in silence, looking out the window and feeling complete peace with one another. I feel him drawing lazy shapes on my back before leaning a little and kissing the side of my head. I tilt my head up to lightly peck his lips, pulling away to flash him a smile.

“How was it? I uhm hope it was how you wanted it to be, sorry if it wasn’t that good. I’m also learning how this works” he whispers, not wanting to break the peaceful environment we are in, but also feeling nervous that he didn’t do well for his first time. I press a kiss to his chest before laying my head back down.

“It was perfect. By perfect I mean awkward, soft, and absolutely clumsy. Just the way it was meant to be, we get to learn all of it together and that’s what made it perfect. I mean you weren’t the only one having their first time” I tell him truthfully, letting him know that I didn’t want a typical perfect first time movie sex scene. I wanted him and all his clumsiness and lanky body trying to figure out where to go, because that’s why I love him. So we bumped heads a couple of times and fumbled around more than a few times, it was perfectly imperfect.

He smiles and just looks out the window, as I look at him. It might have been a little awkward and we might have not known what we were doing most of the time, but that’s how it’s supposed to be. I lay in his arms, watching the twinkling lights in his eyes, thankful to be in the city of love.

[spiderman-homecomeme]

Hey! I love your fanfics! Could write something like MJ making fun of Peter calling his penis web shooter? 👀

okay first of all: YES. 

second of all: This took me approximately a million years to finish, but here it is!! Sorry it took so long!! Thank you so much for sending this in and for your patience!!

This one gets a lil saucy guys (nothing explicit bc im a coward lmao), so hold onto your butts ig

here’s about 1.2k of sweet n’ saucy fluff

.

.

There’s been a handful of embarrassing moments in the short time Peter’s been on this Earth, a good portion of them being more recent than others, and he’s come to accept that for the most part; being a perpetual fool was just part of the whole awkward teenager gig. 

But accidentally revealing his not cool-in-the-slightest nickname for his… well, nether regions… that he’d said while on a mission in Prague—as a joke—to his best-friend-newly-turned-girlfriend ranks pretty high up on the top ten list of his most mortifying moments. 

He knows he’ll never live this down.

He’s not sure what exactly it was in his brain that tells him that this would be a good thing to just spit out in the heat of the moment, that this would somehow not totally ruin whatever it is they were about to do. 

Maybe he was drawing too much inspiration from the variety of adult films he’d seen; his own god-awful attempt at dirty talk. 

It was all going so well; so perfectly, in fact, that he couldn’t really tell if this is another one of those dreams or not. 

He’s sat at the edge of his twin bed, dressed only in a pair of boxers as, in a surge of shaky confidence, MJ disconnects her lips from his and sinks to her knees in front of him, the movement so fast it’s almost disorienting. His brain practically short circuits at the image of her between his legs, his fists mindlessly grasping at the sheets under him, knuckles turning white at the pressure. 

Ohgodohgodohgodohgod.

It had to have been a moment of sheer panic, just something his nervous brain made him say in an effort to ease the tension, to break the thick silence. Up until this point, they’d only ever gotten to the ever magical second base, so this was completely new, uncharted territory. 

He thinks he might die at the way MJ briefly looks up at him from under her lashes, a shy grin tugging at the corner of her lips. The sudden urge to pull her right back into his lap and never stop kissing her is almost overwhelming, but he remains strong. 

Well, for the most part. 

He’s still internally freaking the fuck out that his beautiful girlfriend is currently having what might be the world’s longest staring contest with his boner.  

She seems almost as nervous as he is, her arms at her side as she sits back on her heels, palms flat against the tops of her thighs, her fingers tapping anxiously. Her eyebrows raise in a silent question, eyes glancing between his face and the prominent tent in his boxers.

Peter nods, perhaps with a little too much enthusiasm, swallowing thickly as she cracks a giddy, toothy smile. He mentally kicks himself for being so inarticulate at such a crucial moment, silently wondering if MJ can tell how freaking nervous he is as she shifts her weight forward. His breath catches in his throat as her fingers slowly ghost along the tops of his thighs, her touch feather-light as she starts toying with the waistband of his boxers.

And it’s then, right then, that Peter’s mouth seems to wanna go rogue, to become this loose cannon that doesn’t play by the rules. Fuck his brain. He didn’t need that.

Peter deepens his voice—or, he tries to—though the breathy quality is unshakable as he puts on a false, almost comedic sense of bravado. 

“You wanna… play with my… web shooter?”

First, he realizes, perhaps, that it’s a pretty dumb question.

Second, he realizes that the cheesy lines in all those porn movies tend to not be realistic at all and that they actually sound really goofy when applied to real life situations.

And third, he realizes he may have broken his girlfriend.

MJ freezes in her place, her brows pinched together in confusion for barely a second, as if she’s questioning the very sense of reality in that moment, before she snorts loudly, hearty scream-laughs wracking her body as she crumples forward, resting her forehead on the edge of his knee as she tries to hold herself up. “You did not—!” She struggles to get the words out through her laughter. “You did not just—!” A hiccup, a wheeze. She shakes her head, looking back up at him, and for a moment, he thinks her little giggle fit might be over. 

In her defense, she tries to maintain a stoic expression, though she’s only able to hold it for a split second before bursting into more boisterous laughter. 

He thinks his entire body might just be the exact same shade of red as his Spider suit.“MJ—”

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” She holds a finger up, cutting him off, before clearing her throat, though a stray chuckle still bubbles up from her chest. “It’s just…” And it takes her another minute to collect herself, though she still’s still practically vibrating with amusement. “Web shooter?” She finally asks quietly, as calm as she can manage, the corners of her lips twitching violently as she tries to hold back another laugh.

On the bright side, she doesn’t seem as nervous anymore.

As embarrassed and absolutely mortified as he is, Peter can certainly see the humor in the situation. He’s unable to fight back his own sheepish smile, nudging her gently. “Shut up!”

“That was lame,” She teases. “Really lame. Even for you, dude.”

“I know, I know!” He huffs. “Gimme a break, okay?” He pleads, playfully nudging her again when he can see the early signs of another fit of laughter start to take her. “I thought it would…” He pauses, tilting his head from side-to-side as he lowers his voice, shrugging timidly. “… enhance the mood.”

She purses her lips in an effort to keep them from breaking, mirth twinkling in her eyes as she nods solemnly. “Mmhmm. Yeah. Makes sense.”

“Clearly, it didn’t work.”

MJ shrugs. “I mean, it made me laugh, so that’s something.” 

Peter lets out a huff of amusement as he shakes his head. 

“So this isn’t like… a kink of yours is it?” MJ suddenly asks, the teasing lilt in her tone still very much present. 

His eyes widen in surprise, jaw dropping. “What?!” 

“I mean, you’re not gonna have me call you Spider-Man are you?”

“—Oh my god, MJ.” He throws his head back as a fully exasperated groan escapes him. 

“—And like, throw the mask on, have me ask you to web me up or something—”

“—Please, stop—”

“—I mean, whatever gets you going,” MJ reasons, her lips pulled into a faint smirk. “Whatever helps your Peter tingle, I guess.”

If it was his own initial comparison of his dick to his web shooter that killed him, that was what put the damn nail in the coffin. At this point, he knows that there’s nothing he can do or say that can stop this relentless teasing. 

For the umpteenth time that night, he shakes his head. “I hate you,” he says with all the affection in the world.

And MJ only grins cheekily back at him, squinting. At the near radio silence that falls after, the air still crackling, she moves to sit next to him, playfully knocking her shoulder against his. “But, hey, if it’s any consolation, I did learn something.”

Peter’s gaze snaps to hers. His head cocks to the side, eyebrows pinched in slight confusion. “What?”

“I mean, I didn’t know your web fluid was organic—”

She doesn’t get to finish that sentence, both of them unable to contain their smiles as he effectively shuts her up with a firm, but loving kiss.

[heyauntieeee]

I don’t have anything specific but college Erik is my favorite Erik 🥰🥰🥰

Title: Study Buddy (Lame ass title I but I couldn’t come up withanything else lmao)

College!Erik X Black!Reader

Summary: Erik helps you study for your TEAS exam

Warnings: Language, Slight smut (my first time bear with me)

This would be my first time writing college!erik but I hope you enjoy it. This subject is currently relating to me because I’ve been studying for the entrance exam for nursing, so here it goes!

The both of you were currently onspring break, however, while your roommates went home, you decided to stay atcampus to study for the TEAS exam and your boyfriend Erik is staying with yousince he doesn’t have any family outside of you. Since this test was one of theonly things, besides your grades, that was standing between you and the nursingprogram, you made it very clear that there couldn’t be much fooling around asyou were taking the test in two weeks time.

The two of you were sitting on yourcouch in your campus apartment. Your books and notes litters on the coffeetable. There was a highlighter between your teeth and a pen between your indexand middle fingers. You were deeply engrossed in your notes focusing on thescience section in particular seeing as it was the most important section ofthe exam. 

You could feel Erik staring a holein the back of your neck, so you sit up and squint your eyes at him.

“I thought you were gonna help mestudy.”

“You tryna be in them books, I’m tryna be in them guts. It’s beena minute since I seen you baby girl, I miss you.” Erik proceeds to startkissing your neck and while you missed him too, God knows you did, you couldn’t be distracted at themoment. You shrug him off of you and mush his face trying to push him to theother side of the couch not caring about the fact that he was so fucking bulkyhe didn’t budge, he snorts at your effort.

“Daka you know this test isimportant,” You whine. “I can’t be fucking around I need at least an 85% onthis thing.”

He sighs, knowing you were rightand not willing to come between you and your education. He had faith that youwould pass considering you excelled in your prerequisite courses. You were everthe over achiever, willing to succeed by any means necessary. He could recallnot being able see or talk to you for days, when you were in high school andthroughout your time in college because you had to study for exams or completeprojects and papers. Hell, if it weren’t Spring Break this would undoubtedly beone of those times. Trust and believe he was the same way, but for the week hejust wanted to lay up under his girl.

“Aight, how about this, every timeyou get an answer right, I’ll kiss you wherever you want.” The proposition, ascorny and cliché as it was, piqued your interest. As fly as Erik was, he’s had his fair share of being a cornballsometimes.

“Is this to help me or to helpyou?” You ask.

“I’m helping the both of us getwhat we need, princess.” Surely you weren’t gonna pass up on his offer. Youthink why the hell not.

“Ard, quiz me.”

Excited, he grabs one of the studybooks and tells you that they’ll do science questions sincethat’s what you’ve been focusing on for that particular day, then flips the pages to the back of thebook where the practice questions were. He looks over the question beforeraising his head to meet my eyes. His gaze makes you squirm.

“First question: What crystallinesolid contains ionic bonds with the least covalent character?”

You scrunch yourface up. “So, you just gon come out the gate with the hard questions? Youknow I hate chemistry.” 

“Ion give a fuck, you answering thequestion. Tic toc lil nigga.” You kiss your teeth and think hard. Chemistry wasnever your strong suit. In all honesty you still don’t know how you managed topull a ‘B’. Must’ve been by the grace of God. Finally, you just give upand guess.

“I don’t know, Sodium?”

There was a pause for about fiveseconds before he lets out this obnoxious buzzing noise scaring the living shitout of you.

“DAMN NIGGA! Did you have to be sofucking loud?!”

“Did you have to be so wrong?”

“Don’t make me smack you Erik.”

“You ain’t slapping shit over here,I dare you.” You roll your eyes.

“Anyway, what’s the answer,” you ask impatiently.

“Lithiumfluoride. We coming back to that question.”

“Or we canskip chem all together,” you mutter.

“NOT ON MYWATCH!” He yells as he slams his hand down on the book startling you onceagain.

“Aight,Iyanla Vanzant wannabe next question!”

He flipsthrough some pages again saying more slick shit under his breath. Some thingsto the effect of ‘not letting his babyfuck up her grade cause she don’t know the difference between coefficients andcovalent bonds. She gon learn today.’ When you think about it, it’s reallysweet, but he can be so damn aggravating. He finally finds another question andreads.

“What eventoccurs simultaneously with the end of systole?” This one you definitely knew.

“The rightventricular pressure reaches a minimum value.” Erik grins.

“That’s whatI’m talkin bout baby! Where you want it?”

You thinkabout where you want to be kissed and remember he didn’t kiss you when he camethrough the door earlier, he only greeted you with a weak ass half hug becausehe was on the phone when he walked in, which he knows you hate but themotherfucker still does it anyway.

You thenpoint to your lips with a pout. “I never got my kiss when you came in, justsome lame ass hug.”

“My bad mama,I was handling business.”

“I know.” Andyou knew exactly what that business was.

Erik goingaway on his secret missions, coming home bruise, bloodied, and new additions ofscars to his body. Of course, you didn’t like seeing him that way and everytime you fussed over him and cleaned him up, he’d remind you that this was allpart of the plan that he was destined for something, greater and that our timewould come.

You’rebrought out of your thoughts by the feeling of Erik’s soft full lips on yours. Youinstantly start kissing him back, your hands grip his forearms, longing tobring him closer. He leans more toward you, his large frame towering over youas he deepens the kiss. You lean back further into the couch and allow him torest between your legs. He brings one of his hands to your next and it reststhere for a second, then you feel the slight pressure of Erik squeezing yourneck with just enough pressure that causes you to gasp, letting his tongueenter your mouth. The taste of him is unreal, even after all these years ofbeing with him, kissing him like this, he still tastes better than the firsttime you kissed him. You let his tongue dominate yours and roam around in yourmouth. You let a small moan leave your mouth and get an ‘mhm’ in reply. Thebass in his voice sends a shock down your spine and straight to your core. Youmoan again as you feel the wetness between your thighs.

The sound ofthe book falling to the floor caused you to break apart. Erik gives you one morepeck and pulls away, picking up the book and flipping back to the questions asif nothing happened. Meanwhile you’re a panting mess lying on the couch.

“Come on lilbit, we gotta finish.”

Not wantingto move, you pout. “But-” He quickly interrupts.

“Ion wannahear that whining shit, you said you wanted to study so that’s what we doing.Sit ya thick ass up and get to work.”

“Ok” you sayin a hushed tone as you reluctantly sat up.

“Aight nextquestion…”

After a answeringa series of questions, getting only a few wrong and being subjected to Erik’sloud ass buzzing noise and the ones you got right, well… let’s just stay you’reglad you won’t really have to step out of the house for the week. You bothagreed to avoid kissing the lips to avoid further distraction. So, you had himkiss you in simpler places, your forehead, cheeks, the back of your hands. Butwhen he got to your neck and torso, you would’ve thought Erik was a wild animalthe way he marked you up. Dark hickies littered your neck and torso. What wassupposed to be a light peck and nibble, turn into a ravishing of your body. Hewas now examining his work with pride.

“And when wego out, you ain’t covering them shits either.” You scoff and roll your eyes asyou examine yourself in the mirror with horror.

“N’Jadaka Ican’t leave the house looking like this!”

“You thinkthat I give a fuck? Cause I don’t. You mine and everybody gonna know it. Andwhen they fade Imma put more on you.”

“Everybody oncampus already knows that I’m yourstrust me. You ain’t marking up my body no more nigga.”

“We’ll seebout that shit.” You make your way toward the couch with a yawn, ready to bedone with this study session. Your brain was officially fried, and you justwanted to go to bed.

“Aightprincess last question. You get this one right and I’ll pick where I get tokiss you ok?”

“Ok,” You sayready and nervous for the next question.

“What hormonehas rapid effects that are similar to effects associated with the activation ofthe sympathetic nervous system?”

You almostdrew a blank. You had studied the endocrine system from top to bottom and itwas just on the tip of your tongue.

“Thyroidhormone?”

There was along pause and you almost disappointed that you got it wrong until…

“YEAH BABY!HELLYEAH! WHO GETTING IN THAT NURSING PROGRAM? YOU GOT THAT SHIT IN THE BAG”his shouting startled you but excited you all the same. Erik picks you up andspins you around showering your face with kisses making you giggle. He settlesyou down to your feet and looks you deep in your eyes. His dark eyes staringinto the very depth of your soul.

“You got thisshit Y/N. No matter how much you doubt or worry or stress you one of thesmartest people I know. You getting ya ass in that program and you gon killthat shit. And know, no matter what happens, I got you, for life. You hear me?”

You stare upat him with tear in your eyes. You never thought it could be possible to lovein even more than you did in this moment. Struggling to find the words to say,you say the only words you can form. “I love you baby.”

“I love you more.Now lemme give you your reward. Lay down on the couch.”

You excitedlylay back look at Erik in all his glory. All you can think is how could you havegotten so lucky. You watch as he removes his hoodie with the shirt underneathto reveal his muscular form and scar riddled chest. You lick your lips inanticipation.

“You gon letDaddy reward you?” his voice was low and husky; his eyes were filled with lust.You bite your lower lip and nod your head.

“I need wordsbaby.”

“Yes please.”

He settles himselfbetween my legs like before. He places his lips on your and you start to kissback. He sucks my bottom lip into his mouth, and you moan into his mouth. Erikreleases your lips and trails more kisses down your neck, and you moan somemore. Everything about him drove you insane. You sit up and remove your shirtand bra. Erik immediately start put the left breast in his mouth, twirling histongue around the nipple letting the bud harden. You arch your back as he gentlybites the nipple.

“Ah!” yougasp.

“You alrightbabygirl.” Erik asks blowing air on the wet mound, making your nipple hardeneven more.

“Yes.”

He gives you anotherkiss, repeats the actions on the other breast. He works his way down, nippingand licking your torso until he gets to the top of your shorts. You sit up on yourforearms and watch with anticipation. Erik looks up and peers at you intently.

“You ready?”

“I’m ready” yousay breathlessly.

He begins toslide your shorts off at an agonizingly slow pace and to his delight, you weren’twearing any underwear. He throws your shorts to the floor.

“Look at thatshit,” he hissed, dragging a finger along your glistening slit and you moan at thetouch. “You so fuckin wet, who all this for?”

It’s for yo-fuuuckkkk” You were cut off as her slid a finger inside your core. He leans forward,brining his lips to your ear.

“I didn’thear you, who you said it was for.” His voice was even deeper, and it was drivingyou crazy as he start to pump his finger inside you, brushing your spot withevery movement. You moan louder

“It’s for youDaddy!” That gains a growl from him.

“That’sfuckin right!” He inserts another finger and pumps faster, massaging your clitwith his thumb. You were panting at this point, gripping the back of the couchholding on for dear life.

“It feels sogood.” You cried.

“You bout tofeel even better.” He sits up, removes his fingers, brings them to his mouth andstarts to suck every drop of your juices, never taking his eyes off you. Youshudder. He pulls his fingers out with a pop and licks his lips.

“Damn yousweet.”

He lower himselfbetween your legs and began to kiss your inner thighs, nipping all the way downto your core. He smacks a loud kiss right on your clit.

“MWAH! Love thatpussy!”

“Stop playin,E.” you giggled.

“Ain’t nobodyplayin. I’m showing this pussy some love, putting respect on her name.”

“Are youfinished or are you done?” you decided to go alone with the Bird Man reference.

He growls andyanks you toward him throwing your legs over his shoulders and began devouringyour pussy.

“Shit!”

He sucked onyour clit hard, swirling his tongue around it repeatedly. Erik dragged his tongueup and down dipping it inside your core every time. He lifted his face and spaton my clit, beard wet and all.

“Goddamn,”you say. “You so fuckin sexy keep doing that shit.”

“My pleasure.”

“Nigga thisain’t Chic-fil-a, eat my pussy!”

“You gon shutthat smart shit up Y/N keep playin.”

“Keep eatinand I won’t have nothing to say.”

He muttersabout having something for your ass later then lowers his head once again. Hebrought his face to your wetness once more and sucked on the clit while movingtwo fingers inside of you at a fast past. You gripped his dreads in one hand ashe curls his fingers to hit your spot once again.

“Fuck yess!” youscream feeling so close, you were almost there.

“Cum for mebabygirl, gimme that shit.” His words were more than enough to bring you to theedge. Your back arched as you moaned loudly, you could feel your wallstightening around his fingers. Erik lapped up your release, a deep growl camefrom his throat.

“So fuckin sweet.I’d eat you all day everyday if I could.” He kisses his way up your body as youpanted in exhaustion finally reaching your lips. He kissed you deeply dippinghis tongue in your mouth. You moaned as you tasted yourself on his tongue. Hereleases you from his mouth and looks you in the eyes.

“You likeyour reward?” you smiled.

“Yes, thankyou study buddy.”