#ppl in the tags of That post being like ‘sorry I keep talking about dream but this pisses my off’ uhhhhh ur obviously not comfortable

[cantofworms]

.

[clockworkspider]

Yes. Well it's more accurate to say they fight over [unnamed pov character] making them a dress it was funny. I think it was like the second ever enstars dream I had (after Shu and his boat).

Basically I knew I wasn't myself and was looking at everything through the eyes of a girl that was part of the handicraft club. Keito enters the club room demanding a dress for a live or something like that and using the authority of the student council to get it done with priority (girl told him she was already drowning in work because there was basically no one else in club at the moment that could). While she's explaining and getting more irritated by the second Rei burst through the door starts bickering with Keito about how he should get the dress made actually.

They continue for a while until the girl has had enough of their shit, stops working on the current outfit (she was working in it when Keito entered even though she was talking to him she didn't look up from her work except for giving him some very angry looks and when he said something incredibly mind boggling to her, and still she didn't stop working), angrily gets up from her spot, separates the both of them, says something along the lines of "IF I AGREE TO MAKE YOU BOTH THE STUPID DRESSES WILL YOU LEAVE???" they says yes and she promptly kicks them out of the room saying she'll contact them when she's done and to not come back unless they want a needle stuck in their hands or for their mouths to be sawn shut. And she slams the door to the club room shut before they can say anything back and promptly locks it so they cannot get back in as she sighs and bows to someday kill them if they keep being such asses (and also the rest of the club members for not helping with the outfits)

So yeah that was fun. Also I say reikei because while they were arguing at the very least Rei was very clearly also flirting at the same time so... And it's like he was jealous oh Keito for getting a dress for some reason??? like "you cannot be the prettiest person here that can only be me". Dreams! They're funky like that.

Sorry for dumping all of this on your ask box I cannot tag people on tumblr currently so if I had made it a post I would not be sure if you'd be able to see and I cannot write all if that in a comment.

😂

Oh my god that sounds like A Time was had. Stressful night?

Wish you got to see the dresses haha... This girl gets ppl to shut up by agreeing to more work she sounds like Anzu. (Tho Anzu is too nice to shout at ppl.)

[saintshigaraki]

BRUH I ACCIDENTALLY UNFOLLOWED WHILE TRYING TO SEND THIS ASK IM GONNA SUE TUMBLR

anyways.

i read your tags on my sad rambling and i just wanted to come here and give you everything i have to offer which is a bruised heart and 3.45$ (i think that's enough to buy two coffee depending on where you live, maybe if we're lucky we can even get a donut to split) 💕💞💓💗💖💘

i really really love dabi so so much and i just keep thinking about how badly i want to remind him that he's a person too. even though he's this big bad villain who's committed so many crimes my heart always hurts at the thought of how young he was when he left home,,, and i think touya is still trying to look for home again,,, even if there's a physical house he's in it's still not home, a feeling of being able to finally rest. i want dabi to finally go home. i want to give him the warmth and safety that every person, every child, deserves.

i know it's silly and that his abuse doesn't justify his actions, but at the same time i find it so incredibly unfair. there's no empathy for him, no understanding that he's built up all these walls because there's a heart that's desperate to not be hurt again. he can detach himself from his humanity but i think he'll always crave the intimacy of wanting to be seen, wanting to be understood. and i think it's such a disservice to him if we forget the fact that before a villain, before a criminal, he was just a little boy with a dream.

i know some people think dabi is a playboy and wouldn't care about a potential s/o (not that i think there's anything wrong with writing him like that) but the soft part in me always thinks that while dabi would try to push you away, it's because he can't understand why someone would want him. because if he spent his entire teen/early twenties convincing himself that his hands are made for destruction, how could he possibly convince himself that those same hands can hold you? it scares him, a bit, that you would die for him - because every life he's taken has always been taken, never given.

(i am so sorry for spamming your inbox jsdhfkshjksd i didn't mean to ramble this much but i just wanted to add that i don't think i'll ever be anywhere near your level of understanding poetry and writing beautiful prose, but i read this and the third stanza made me think of dabi <3)

-nilani <3

(i accidently unfollow ppl all the time when i send them asks. tumblr really hates us rip)

i dont think my heart ever wont hurt for dabi. obviously, like you said, the abuse he experienced doesn't justify his crimes and im not and will never try to justify or excuse some of the things hes done (even though i joke that dabi has never done anything wrong and if he did no he didnt)

'i want dabi to finally go home' god. you just really hit the nail on the head with that. i think home & healing go hand in hand with his character. and in a way, i think healing for him can be a sort of home.

'he'll always crave the intimacy of wanting to be seen' yes absolutely i love this take more than i can put into words. dabi wants to be seen. dabi desperately wants to be heard. by the world but mostly by the person he loves. i feel like that’s a core part of his character.

tbh i don’t really get the whole…dabi canonically wouldn’t care for his s/o take that seems to go around. of course, any and all characterizations are completely fine, and we have no way of really knowing how he’d act in a romantic relationship, but i feel like things have gotten to the point where ppl are labeling any and all instances of dabi not being downright awful to his s/o as ooc which is kind of frustrating. it’s a disservice to his character to say as he can only act one way with all ppl otherwise it’s ooc.

personally, i think dabi fears vulnerability more than anything else. which is why he automatically pushes ppl away but once someone manages to wiggle their way past those defenses it’s game over. he’s not letting go until he absolutely has to. and even then…it’d take an army.

nilani!! i can not put into words how beautiful that dabi fic was. i’ve been thinking about it since you posted it. your take on dabi is one of if not my absolute favorite. please PLEASE never apologize for talking about him with me

[hikari-writes]

❅A Love Letter I Have to My Lovely and Beloved Friends❅

(I just know that 30 july was a national friendship day and today is like 31 july already at where I am but,,, just pretend that this is also for National Friendship Day 🤡🔫)

As you all know, it's been confirmed that I'll be going on a hiatus two days from now that I really don't know how long it will go on. So, with that in mind, I wished to leave this message to all the wonderful friends I've made while I was active here on Tumblr during quarantine.

I've started this writing blog a few months ago, to be precise, on May where life in quarantine was starting to become a norm. In the few months until now, I did my best to start writing and drawing more using all the free times that I have.

I wouldn't have expected this blog to grow so much in such a short time. To me, it was really mind blowing, seeing that there's a lot of other great content creators here on Tumblr. Yet, the 300+ people who stumbled upon my blog still decided to follow me.

I was really happy to have made many contents that I'm actually proud of posting. And I still can't believe there are people out there who love them. Seeing every one of your comments and reblogs and likes really, really, squeezed my heart and I couldn't be more thankful for your support.

And during these fun times, I was able to make friends with many amazing, talented, fantastic and all the good words I could find in the dictionary people on here. You all are a real gift to me and I hold you guys close to my heart.

I still can't believe I was able to befriend you guys though, like, y'all are so amazing and I was just here like squeaking my name to you like a shy mice lmao. =///= Anyways, thank you for all the good and fun times. Thank you for being with me and helping me with lots of things. Just, thank you for everything. (I'm writing this at 1am like it's sad hours yall I'm crying :')))

If you are ever feeling down, do not ever forget that, even if it's only me, I'll support you to the end of the world because you're just so amazing and fantastic. I love you and never let any hate that's thrown at you let you down because they aren't worth your time.

The people I'll be mentioning below are my dear friends or just people that I have been interacting with during the times I was online, little or not, I still consider you guys to be my friends (very self-proclaimed here sorry)and I'm still honoured by that fact.

@your-local-bnha-writer -Bean, you and your posts are always so wholesome and cute and I love them. Keep being amazing, and we may not interact much, but I still appreciate every little convos we had. Also, wish you luck on tpn, that shit hurted :')

@identifybby -Liaaaa, omg im so v v grateful we became friends. You've helped me with a tons of things and I can't thank you enough for everything you've done to me. You're just so amazing and thank you for always putting up with me, i love you sm.

@minteasketches -Mintea! You're such an amazing artist and I rlly enjoyed our conversations! You might not see this since you're off socmed but just wanna let u know that thank u for being my friends.

@yandere-of-your-dreams -Heyyy sis,, you're always such a sweet bean to me and showering me w love and i appreciate them, stay amazing and I'm sure you'll become an amazing writer.

@shotobabe -Ren, wifey, ilysm thank u for always being with me. You're such an awesome person and keep on being yourself. You're perfect and talented, don't let others tell you otherwise. AND while I'm gone, don't forget to drink lots of water okay? I won't be able to remind you while I'm on a hiatus, but please always remember to drink water. That'd be the first thing I'll ask you once I'm able to be online. And please try to eat more okay bb? I love u.

@takumipineapplexd -Taku! Amazing writer and amazing editor, yes I'm talking about you. You're amazing and keep on making cursed content and being crackhead, i love them.

@bnhabadass -We might not talk much, but I just want to let you know that you're so amazing and I look up to u v much. Literally had a heart attack when u commented on angel wings lmao.

@tomomoni -Mon, love, soft bean, I LOVE U. You've always been so wholesome and cute to every one of your followers and seeing ur interactions literally heals my heart. Your art is amazing so continue being amazing ilysm thank u for being an amazing advisor and listener, I'm v grateful for that. You have no idea how blessed I am to have you as a friend. Meeting you through turn on your airdrop's fanart was F A T E.

@kamabukokompachiro -First time u asked my permission to read my fanfic, I legit teared up. Thank u sm for asking, I couldn't be happier to know that my fic is worthy to be read over for a yt channel. Keep on being amazing and ily.

@kaminii -Kamiiiii, sweet child, you're always so matured and calm and I really adore and respect that part of you (unlike me im v childish and rash) You're an amazing writer and editor and ur aesthetic? 100/10. Love it. You're so talented despite being so young and I'm just, WOW. Ily and thank u for being friends w me. And please fix your sleeping schedule bb. It's rlly not good for your health, like please? Ily.

@katsucutie -I love you and your writing so v much, and I rlly enjoyed talking to you, discussing about Burn Book was rlly fun. I might not be able to know the ending since im gonna go on a hiatus but I'll be sure to catch up to it once im back. Keep being amazing and awesome.

@isolshi -CHERIE, I LOVE YOU AND YOU'RE AMAZING. Don't be so insecure about your writing. They're amazing. And you're also one of the sweetest and cute person I've met here. I always love teasing you cause your reaction is always so funny and cute. Keep being awesome. And please, please, please get enough sleep and drink LOTS of water. I legit would cry if you don't drink more water cher.

@mirakeul -BIANCAAAAA LOVE YOU'RE SO AMAZING AND SWEET LiKE--- please, I love talking to you and thank you so much for always reminding me to eat. Your calligraphy and handwriting are awesome, shshh i don't take criticism. Never stop writing, I love them. And please never forget I love you and you're my best friend okay?

@roxybefab -You've always been the first to ask me to be on my taglist and I'm so v happy because of that. Thank you for everything, and keep on being awesome. You can do this, ily.

@princessofdawn718 -Talking to you about Hamefura has been so fun! I haven't talked w many ppl about isekai so im rlly glad I could talk about them w you. Katarina x nicol ftw! Thanks for talking to me, it was such a pleasure rlly.

@softkodzuken -Maam your writing is A M A Z I N G. I love anon sm and you're rlly so sweet for always replying to every single comment on them. Don't be so insecure about them, they're amazing and i will always stand by that point. Wishing you the best of luck for Undercover!

@lolitsleia -Your art is *chef's kiss* i love them so much, I still can't believe you hadn't had more recognition like why?? Ur oc alex is the cutest thing ever and i love her. Thank you again for drawing Yuki. She looked really beautiful and cute in your drawing.

@samanthaa-leanne -We may not talk much, but when you first followed me back, my heart goes B O O M. You're so amazing and keep being like that. And uh,, good luck with Violet Evergarden if you ever plan to watch it. Prepare a couple of tissue boxes....or dozens.

@miyumtwins -Fellow android users! I first saw you through Bean's post about a tag game and i was like *gasp* another androiders..! I swear that one time i was interacting w you, I didn't actually meant to go off anon,, yes im dumb lmao. Anyways, you're rlly amazing and I'm rlly honoured to be followed by you.

@kawasuno -Your smau? 100/10. Your sense of humour 100/10. They're just so perfect *chef's kiss* I love every one of your updates and they always managed to put a smile on my face, i was like, how did you do that? My sense of humour is nonexistant, teach me your ways sensei. But anyways, you're rlly amazing and awesome. Keep up w that.

@kukusbabe -Tsu, I've never said this, but it's you. It's always been you all along. What i mean is, I've followed you first (i knew u through zara's flopping server yeah!) And when i looked at my dash and saw all your interactions w your moots, despite me haven't legally started haikyuu yet, i decided to follow all of them, soooo if it's not for you, we may not have met each other. Everyone in the kita family, Tsu is the MVP here muah. Also your aesthethic and writing and everything is so kajsjhendnd amazing i LOvE---

@iwaixiumi -King Nami, you're so awesome and amazing,, and I'm really glad to be able to interact w you. All those songs you recommend? Yeah, I'm going to listen and love all of them, thank u so much for the recs. Keep being amazing and to everyone reading this, PLEASE INTERACT WITH KING NAMI MORE SHE DOESN'T BITE---

@shoutodoki -Hello, you're so amazing and talented and im just,,, kekkdjfjdj when you followed me--- and when u figured out i was the anon talking about oboro i was OAKSJEJDDJ please, i was so honoured u know, like ???? Anyways, keep on writing what you love and your art maam? THEY'RE AMAZING LIKE BOTH YOUR ART AND WRITING IS SO KAJSJDJDN pliS im so v honoured to be able to talk to you.

@lisarillia -Please excuse me while I go shout in the corner of how much i LOVE your arts. They're amazing and being able to talk to you was a real pleasure. Keep on doing what you love. They'll be amazing no matter what i swear.

@cutiedrawsbnha -Cutie, honey, you're amazing and your art is so cute! Don't let what haters said get to you. You're going to grow into an amazing artist. If you give in and listen to what they said, you're going to end up like what they said so ignore them honey! I believe in you so keep shipping izuocha, todomomo, and kamijirou and making arts. Lotsa love!

@lilikags -Heeyyyy you sweet cute innocent bean! Don't ever stop writing what you love, you'll grow into a big blog soon enough, before you know it. Just keep making what you love, and as time pass by, I'm sure there will be many people who will find appreciate everything you do. I'm always supporting you.

@baeshijima -SOPHHHHH YOU SWEET CUTE CINNAMON ROLL WAKATOSHI'S WIFE EYE--- You have NO idea how much i love you,, you're so sweet and I honestly don't know what did i do to deserve you. Srsly you're a blessing to me. Thank you for the sweet daily reminder in my inbox, i love each and every one of them. Keep being so cute and wholesome, love you.

@shinsuque -ANAAAAA Thanks again for the Bakugou's memes! I may not be able to do it before i go on a hiatus though *sobbing* Keep being so awesome! I love seeing all your interactions and you're so amazing i honestly don't know why you followed me----

@semiluvr -LYDIA *SOBBING* THANK YOU SO SO MUCH FOR INVITING ME TO THE KITA FAMILY. Even though we've known each other in less than a week, it already felt like I had known you guys for so long like whotttt. Keep being an amazing and sweet person ily muah

@dumbass-lev -MOMMY, MUI, ILY THANK U FOR ALWAYS BEING SO SWEET YOU'RE AMAZING,,, u have no idea how happy (and also flustered) I am when i saw you asking you want to adopt me like,,, whot I've never been asked to be adopted online b4 so you asking that was a big surprise to me and just,,, remember that i love you and you're an amazing mommy. Hope i wasn't too much too handle as your child lol and thank u, for asking to invite me to the server. It has been a real pleasure to me to be there.

@pudding-head-kenma -DANIE!! We haven't talked much and I've only known you for a short time but I really love your detailed analysis. They're amazing and you're amazing. Thank you for being so sweet and cute. Ily.

@/🦋 nonoi -🦋 NONOIIII!!! IF YOU'RE SEEING THIS, I JUST WANNA TELL YOU THANK YOU FOR BEING MY EMOJI ANON! I love you you're so sweet and bb please please please don't forget me id cry,,,

@astereim -Rein!!! I know we just talked and all but you seem to be a reaally cool and amazing person,, we might not be able to interact much since I need to go prepare things b4 i go on my hiatus though, but just wanna let u know that ily!

@tokoyamis-luv -please don't come for my neck i haven't been active on the server Lol but anyways, zara, you're amazing and your simping for Kurapika is always fun to watxh. Also all the lin manuel edits are *chef's kiss* we may not talk much but i was rlly honoured to be able to interact w you, even a little bit.

@engel-hageshii - YOU, MAAM are a literal angel, and your comments on my fics always managed to make me smile so much. I love you, please never stop being such a sweetheart.

@laylahoran -I've always loved and appreciate every comments you make. I'm v happy I was able to create a content that you can love. You and engel has been some of my firsts followers and I'm really blessed to have you two.

@oyasenpai -Diemmy! You're so sweet and cute and seeing your interaction w my moots (kami) was what made me follow you. Don't let what others said bring you down, okay? Just do what you want because there're always many people supporting you for it.

Special message to the kita family server;

Meanwhile while you guys were talking about me there, I was just innocently scrolling through Tumblr, not knowing what kind of fate I'll be receiving 👁👄👁 No wonder I was sneezing so much 🤧🤧🤧

So, I was just scrolling through the pinned messages and I saw tsu said "mui: can we invite hikari? Everyone here: kakskejdjdjdn" and i was just like,,, ??????? I wasn't expecting u guys to have that kind of reaction i--- yall have no idea how much i was grinning while I scroll through those messages. Thank you so much for inviting and accepting me, it's really fun to be with you guys and your crackhead energy 🥰🥰 Thank you to mui for suggesting you had no idea I was really really happy. 😭 Y'all are so amazing and sweet and cute and beautiful kakjdjdd

To all of my dear friends that I've mentioned above, I LOVE YOU LOTS YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW GRATEFUL I AM TO MET YOU GUYS. Quarantine time has been stressful for a lot of people, and Tumblr can sometimes (a lot of times) be kinda whack but I was really happy to met you guys during my time here. Our time together may have been short, but i feel like we've known each other for more than a year, no caps. I love you all very very much. Thank you for talking to me and befriending me. Remember to get enough sleep, drink lots of water, stay safe and healthy, eat enough meals and, take care of yourself. I love you guys.

And lastly, to everyone reading this, whether i know you or not, or interacted with you or not, or follow you or not, or you follow me or not, just REMEMBER that you are worth it and I love you. Keep on being awesome, and always remember to smile, laugh and live. Don't forget to always DRINK LOTS OF WATER, GET ENOUGH SLEEP, and EAT ENOUGH MEALS.

Signing off,

Hikari.

[avenger-hawk]

Hi, can you talk a little bit about naruto’s dark, controlling and possessive side? Or if you already wrote about it, link me the post? Thankss

I mentioned something here, here and probably there is smth in this tag. 

And like I said countless times since you guys just don’t care about other ppl, if you write n*ruto’s name entirely it will show up in the search pages and I am fed up with raging SN/SN.S/Nar stans bitching at me.

Sorry (nope, not sorry) to break someone’s bubble but Nar is not a happy ball of sunshine and he’s not selfless. 

He was neglected as a child, totally abandoned to himself with some money each month and an apartment he was supposed to clean and manage all alone. He was shunned or treated like sh*t by villagers and classmates alike, his only ‘parent’ was Iruka who couldn’t be with him always, and his idea of friendship, family, everything was twisted, cause try living all by yourself since you’re a child and you have no idea of why ppl hate you and avoid you. Of course he saw the Hokage as this big authority figure that everyone respects and ‘loves’ in his child mind, and of course he wanted to be Hokage so that ppl would finally respect and ‘love’ him. His idea of love is obviously screwed, and it’s a mix of respect, aknowledgement, deference.

He doesn’t have a sense of equality because he never learned what equality is. He was below everyone else being shunned and hated, and his role model was above everyone else, where he aspired to be.

He started to make friends and he’s all about comrades, yes, like all shounen protagonists. But it’s always him reaching out to them, him protecting them, him changing their minds about something (or about himself), him obtaining their admiration and respect from an initial situation of being the opposite, being considered a good for nothing and a loser.

Sasuke is considered the opposite since the beginning, he’s a good student and shinobi, he’s left all alone too and nothing is shown of his alone life but from the little things we see he learned to manage himself and the house better, he didn’t care about people probably talking behind his back about the massacre, and he obtained a good reputation in the academy, so the story starts with him in a different situation. And Nar considers him a rival, he’s clearly jealous of the ‘success’ he has, not realizing that he’s alone too. Because Nar is not empathic at all, and his child self is even less, being a child with clear difficulties in processing things, which makes sense since he had no education basically. He just sees external signs of adjustment and ‘success’ which is what he wants, so he ‘hates’ Sasuke and he provokes him all the time. They become rivals, then comrades (and rivals), then friends, but it’s always Sasuke who, despite his aloof personality, shows positive signs, first hand feeding him, then defending him against Sak*ra, then shielding him and many other little things while Nar is always overreacting or doing questionable, not to say bad things (like attacking him and tying him up to meet Sak*ra) to him.

Nar’s lack of empathy can be seen after the inn scene, cause instead of being I won’t even say supportive but, not irritating, he mocks Sasuke who just woke up after Tsukuyomi, provoking him so that Sasuke, already (re)traumatized and feeling worthless towards both his brother and Naru, challenges him. Right after waking up from a coma, basically. And ofc Nar doesn’t hold back.

When Sasuke leaves in part 1 Nar is enraged, ofc, and he reacts violently, even their fight is very violent, and ofc it is being a fight, but Nar is really really brutal, feral I’d say, and possessive, trying to bring him back. I don’t remember their fight well but if I’m not mistaken that’s when he first threatens Sasuke to break all his bones?

Then Sasuke leaves and Nar starts his own “sad boy missing his ‘best friend’ drama” and all the fandom is uwu look at him so sensitive, but he’s being abstract there, while when he faces Sasuke direcly or indirectly he’s different, more direct and not sentimental. As expected of a badass fighter, cause that’s what he is, that’s what everyone is in the story. when in part 2 Orochimaru calls Sasuke ‘his’ he goes berserk, and his search for Sasuke becomes even more obsessive, to the point of claiming that if they’ll fight they’ll both die and theyll be ok in the afterlife...this is kinda poetic but also creepy af. It’s stalker material tbh. Also because in that moment Sasuke just ‘killed’ Danzo, he’s exhausted, visibly blind, especially after fighting Kakashi, whose fight clearly took his toll on him (He avoided Sak*ra’s pathetic attempt to kill him but that was easy). Nar has all his energies and he’s stronger physically anyway having more stamina and kyuubi’s chakra. But he’s ready to fight him, even tho he gives a speech because ofc. too bad that Sasuke doesn’t fall for it cause he has his own personality and his own goals, which for Nar is unacceptable cause everyone must be on his side, especially the one he wants.

Sasuke remains on his own side until Itachi does his thing and bla bla bla, Itachi first is brougth close to Nar which was interesting to watch but also a huge narrative move to bring Sasuke to his side as well, getting to fight alongside his beloved brother and wanting to understand him and his ideal of protecting Konoha thus summoning Orochimaru, the 4 Hokage and deciding to join the battlefield. Then they fight together and even then it’s Sasuke who accepts Naru’s lead, not the other way round because Nar would never obey anyone who’s not himself especially he wouldn’t obey someone he wants to possess, metaphorically (but if you like also literally).

When the battle is over and their battle starts he shows his true colors. He’s no longer the one wanting to die with his ‘friend’, he’s a leader wanting Sasuke, his ‘friend’ who in his eyes took the wrong road, to get back to the village, because Konoha is HIS concept of happiness. In fact, Sasuke in Konoha is Nar’s concept of happiness. And to obtain it he uses every method, not just a good ol’ fight, the more brutal the better. In fact their last fight has a different vibe, it’s Sasuke the one who’s more stressed and emotional, he’s drained, completely, cause he wants his revolution and he wants to change the world to make him like Itachi dreamed of, and he needs to eliminate Nar for it, he doesn’t want to eliminate him but he needs to and he clearly explains him why in the beginning of the fight. The way he fights is desperate.

Nar instead is calm, his emotions are under control, he fights with his hands but also with mind techniques because he manipulates Sasuke all the time: he tells him that he didn’t understand his own brother (implying that he did it better. That he, who interacted with Edo Tensei Itachi for a couple of hours, understands him better than the brother who basically worships him!), that everything he believes is wrong, that he knows what’s best for him (which is interestingly exactly what he wanted in life, what a coincidence). And it works, cause Sasuke admits his own defeat, and, later, he is further brainwashed and guilt tripped, jailed and submitted until he’s a perfect Konoha dog. Even in his Shinden episodes he’s away but loyal and guilt ridden for his actions. He became Naru’s watchdog, his most loyal servant. Not his equal. He fulfilled Naru’s wish for him.

And, in case someone’s still not enraged because Hawk how dare you shit on their amazing bond?  shocking huh? yeah I write what I think and I am very interested in their bond actually, since it’s a dark unhealthy one, completely unbalanced, just like I’m interested in Nar very much when he’s not idealized, cause he’s much more complex and interesting with his dark side.

Every episode shows Nar’s lack of care and empathy, his inner violence and selfishness, but they also are justified somehow. I can understand why, since his childhood made him self-centered and lacking the ability to interact with people on an equal basis, basically he never grew up for real, he acted like a grown up person but he remained a child inside, a possessive child who wants something and then discards it. And it shows whenever he ‘saves’ someone with his TnJ, this someone becomes his ‘friend’, loyal to him forever, and he moves on to ‘save’ someone else, all the while having Sasuke as his ultimate goal. Too bad that after he saves him too, he discards him as well. Not as much as the other cause Sasuke is special to him, but not as an equal either. I won’t mention the jail moment while Naru is basking in his popularity cause some don’t see it as canon, but when in the manga Sasuke is leaving Konoha and stumbles on Nar he says he didn’t think the other would come greet him. This shows how their relationship isn’t so amazing, since one would imagine that Nar would be 24/7 with Sasuke after he comes back.

So, all these moments show a clear picture of him as a possessive and selfish person who only ‘cares’ about ppl because he wants to be ‘loved’ (=admired and respected and aknowledged as the best) by said ppl, and whose ‘love’ for Sasuke is possessive and obsessive to an extreme point, a desire to be aknowledged and respected but also to submit the one whom he most ‘loves’, because there is no equality in the way Nar sees himself and the rest of the world, including ‘his’ ‘best friend’.

(btw if someone disagrees, keep it for yourself, I don’t give a damn about discussing with you)

[babysizedfics]

I need to know about doctor mama lo taking care of a sick baby Virgil if you would like pretty please. I dont wanna ask on the in character blog cuz I feel like it would be weird to ask for details and lo seems kinda busy anyway lol.

hey tumblebee!! yeah yeah lets do this, Im gonna write it so that ppl who dont follow the other blog can understand too

WARNING IF U HAVENT ALREADY BLOCKED THE TAGS ILLNESS TW AND VOMIT TW THEY ARE VERY PREVALENT IN THIS

also this is a VERY long headcanon!!

so last night vee got ill, he had been regressed in the afternoon with patton and he was acting much more fussy than usual - not being entertained by his cartoons, not having the energy to play with his rattle, pretty much constantly whining and pouting and he gets very wriggly when he's fussy

patton assumed it was because vee had been upset earlier that day. at one point vee started gripping his stomach, and patton assumed its because he was hungry and could smell the food roman was cooking

but when dinner came around no matter how hard patton tried he couldnt get vee to eat a morsel - he kept turning his head away from the food and whining. at one point patton and logan both managed to convince him to eat a spoonful but his face crumpled with a wince and it looked almost painful for him to swallow it. it was at this point logan noticed he had a faint sheen of sweat on his forehead

things fell into place quickly after that - logan checked his temperature and it was indeed slightly higher than was healthy, they noticed vee's hands were trembling and he was constantly on the verge of tears :(

while patton cleared away dinner and excused roman who wanted to go and craft in his room, logan took vee to his bedroom and tried to check for more symptoms, since vee was non verbal and unresponsive totheir questions. he tested his tummy by pushing it a little to see if the pain got worse when he released it (this is a test for appendicitis) but there was no reaction thankfully except vee being upset by logan not cuddling him. he checked his throat for any redness or infection, nothing.

vee's crying became more pronounced and eventually he was in constant tears, occassionally pleading 'mama mama' through sniffles and hiccups and whines of pain :(( Patton brought him a baby bottle of cooled tea made with fresh mint leaves since that is supposed to help stomach pains. though he left the room again since logan thought it was best not to crowd virgil. Vee's crying had dissipated but he was strangely silent and seemed almost loopy now. he only drank a little of the tea before he pushed it away with a gag.

logan immediately took him to the bathroom knowing what was coming, and sure enough vee threw up into the toilet, crying between gags. logan dutifully managed to keep vee in his lap the whole time and held his hair and rubbed his back, telling him he was such a good boy the whole time

Thankfully it didnt last long as there wasnt much in vees stomach to be emptied. he was shivering and sweating and flushed and had lost all energy. he wasnt even crying anymore, just whimpering under his breath. with a bit of a struggle logan managed to show him how to rinse his mouth out with mouthwash - though he had to hold vee over the sink and pat his back to make sure he didnt swallow it

during all of this patton wasnt able to help because of his heightened empathy, if he sees someone throwing up the likeihood is he will too and that wiuldnt be very helpful! so instead he drives to the store to pick up some medicine and ice pops - and comes back with half the store including some actual baby medicine smh - ((im actually begging u to read that linked post i think its so funny))

it was originallly meant to be logans night to put roman to bed but understandably patton took on that task instead. after roman was drifting off patton pokes his head into vee's room. he had hoped to find lo and vee asleep but they werent. they were lying in the dark with an in the night garden audio story playing on a portable speaker and with vees salt lamp and star night light lighting up the room in a soft glow.

logan offered a strained little smile and nod to patton as he stroked vee's hair and cuddled him close. vee was completely out of it honestly. his body was wholly lax against his mama, his lips were in a permanent pout and his eyes were puffy and wet. he barely even acknowledged his papa coming in, his teary eyes just settled on him for a moment then dropped back to the bedsheets without a reaction. he kept lifting his thumb up to suck on it but logan kept capturing it and apologising as he brought it away. Vee shouldnt suck on his thumb and logan doesnt want to give him a paci while he's ill. understandably, baby vee was completely miserable.

patton asks if logan thinks vee could handle a popsicle or plain crackers at the moment but logan disagrees. he doesnt expect either of them to get much sleep so he will make sure vee eats something in a few hours. with a gentle kiss on vee's forehead patton goes off to bed, confident that logan will be able to look after vee and will come get him if theres any issues

logan and vee really dont sleep much at all. Vee drifts off for a few minutes at a time then gasps awake from vivid fever dreams. logan keeps ice cubes in a bowl by the bed for vee to suck on if he needs to cool down and wraps a couple in a flannel to press to vee's head when his fever rises in the middle of the night.

around 3am logan jolts awake and realises he had drifted off. and vee isnt anywhere in the room. he panics momentarily, bolting up from the bed and dashing to the closet to see if virgil is in there - which he tends to do when he is overwhelmed - but then he hears sniffling from the bathroom.

he finds vee, no longer regressed, curled up against the side of the bathtub with his bangs clinging to his sweaty head. vee is the palest person logan knows but he looks positively grey at the moment

'can i help in any way?' he asks, aware that he doesnt need to baby talk at the moment but still eager to look after this bundle of miserableness

virgil just groans under his breath and clutches his knees to his chest. 'i.. i didnt know what to do with the..' he gestures vaguely to something on the floor

logan notices virgil, being not regressed anymore, had obviously wrestled off the diaper he had been changed into the night before and not known how to dispose of it

'its ok, ive got it' logan wraps it up in a bag and puts it in the trash can they have in the room for just this purpose

'sorry.. m stupid' virgil croaks

'You're not stupid.' logan says firmly as he washes his hands 'You're ill and probably delirious from the fever. it's alright virgil'

theres quiet for a bit longer, virge's head pressed against the porcelain edge of the bathtub likely in an attempt to cool his fever. logan stays there with him for a while just waiting. then suddenly virgil starts sobbing and buries his face in his hands.

'sweetheart, tell me whats wrong please' logan hurries to kneel beside him, lifting his hands away from his face. that wouldnt help the fever

'i dont feel well' virgil cries pathetically, tears rolling down his face.

logans heart breaks 'no, you dont. i'm sorry little one, i know its not nice'

at the nickname virgils thumb raises to his lips again, which logan hurriedly intercepts. 'i'll make you a deal, okay? you're allowed to use a pacifier, but you have to use the same one everyday until you are better. we will need to sterilise it every night too.'

vee sniffles and nods, then chokes 'm not a baby right now though'

'that doesnt matter. you dont need to be regressed to want one of your pacis, vee'

vee is unresponsive and starts scratching at his pyjama pants. logan gets a feeling he isnt saying something. then he notices virgil's pout is much more infantile than his adult ones. 'are you feeling little, baby?'

with a harsh shake of his head vee starts crying again. he whispers 'dont wanna be a b...' then cuts himself off and whimpers

logan cards his fingers through virgils damp bangs. he knows what virgils mind has jumped to. 'were you going to say you dont want to be a baby?' he lifts virgils chin up to look at him 'or that you dont want to be a burden?'

virgils pale lip wobbles 'same fing'

'no sweetheart, no no no,' logan sits on the tiles beside vee and pulls him into his lap. virgil goes willingly. logan rocks his baby as he says 'youre always always allowed to be a baby and its never ever going to upset your family. even if you're an adorable wonderful brave baby boy alllll of the time' he scribbles his finger on virgils rosy cheek and delights at the tiny smile it earns him. 'but especially when you're feeling yucky. you feel a bit yucky today dont you, little one?'

vee nods with a pout

'but yknow whats not yucky? softies and pacis and diapers and lots and lots of cuddles with mama' he holds virgil tighter to prove his point. vee sighs and drops his head to nuzzle against his mama's neck. logan feels he still has a slight fever. 'i know what might help you feel less yucky. does my sweet baby want a sweet ice pop?'

thankfully vee nods against his shoulder and grips tight onto his pyjama shirt, preparing for when logan lifts him up

he first makes sure to change vee into another diaper and even decides that he should wear one of mama's t-shirts as a light dress so he doesnt get as overheated by his pyjamas. at this point vee actually giggles for the first time pretty much all day as he feels the tshirt swish lazily around his legs. logan makes a mental note to observe whether little vee might want to try wearing dresses if the feeling sparks this much joy (at this point logan is unaware that vee has secretly been trying skirts and dresses in his room for months, and roman found out a few weeks ago, but vee isnt ready to tell the cgs yet)

by the time vee is in his diaper and mamas tshirt dress and has a paci and jiji clutched to his chest he is a lot calmer and happier. he's still very ill and exhausted and teary, but theres a tiny smile on his face instead of a pout. in the kitchen he picks a strawberry ice pop and it goes down well, logan convinces him to have a cracker too though vee is in such a young headspace by then that he is just sucking on it, which logan supposes is fine too

by the (real) morning vee is still regressed and has managed to have a couple hours undisturbed sleep. its not much but its better than nothing. logan didnt fare much better. by then vee misses his papa and asks for him and logan hands the responsibility over to papa patton, trustinf the other caregiver enough to catch up on a quick power nap himself

but yes, the main thing is vee thought being ill was a burden enough that he shouldnt be regressed too, but logan makes him see that its okay. vee is regressed pretty much the whole time he is ill over the next few days because its stressful and painful and its a lot easier to feel comforted when ur a baby

yeah! gosh that was long, theres probably a billion spelling mistakes! feel free to ask follow up Qs if i missed anything u wanted to know abt this event

[dannydouni]

I got tagged by @faceless-dude for smth. And like. All I want to say is that you so much. Cuz I’ve had this sitting in my drafts for months and I didn’t know when would be a good time to post it. Or like update it or like just when I should do anything with it. So yeah. Thank you so much for helping me get the chance to post this :)))

“I’ve had this in my drafts for some time now probably since the Canadian thanksgiving and like only touched on it a few times, and well I never got to post it cuz I got well uuuhhh... shy I guess and at that time a lot of things were going down and stuff. And because of that I just felt like it had no meaning whatsoever anymore. So I thought I’d edit it a bit so it fits better and so I can finally post it and stuff.... sometimes it’s nice to get something out there after having it written down for so long. And well what better time to post it than now XD on New Years!. Anyways here it goes”

Hey guys, friends especially, ITS A NEW YEAR!!!!!! I just wanted to pop in and say that...well...thank you. And while I don’t really mean this directly to anyone so far (details for ppl that I know on this app will be written later on in this post). I know it’s usually super cheesy and just cringe and stuff but I honestly couldn’t care less about that stuff when it comes to the people close to me and to the people I love and care about. So I would like to take this opportunity to thank y’all. First and foremost. What the actual fuck guys. Why lmao. Out of everyone in this world you bunch picked the weirdest, ugliest and just straight up stupidest dude out there to be friends with XD, y’all do know there was much better than this out there right XD. I legit have no competition since I’m just so bad LOL. But still, for some reason, with all the shit I just listed y’all still decided it was a good idea to be friends with me. Y’all still decided it would be a great idea to stick with me up until now. Y’all still decided that I could belong with other people that I could fit it with you guys. That I could.... have genuine, real and just straight up amazing friends. I have absolutely no fucking clue how this turn of events happened. But I can say this with full certainty. You guys have changed my life. You guys are probably the main reason I’m still kicking around to this day lol. You guys are the reason I keep going and keep living and just keep enjoying the tiny gifts that life has to offer sometimes instead of pain XD. I still don’t and probably will never understand why or how god or life decided to be nice to me the few times I met one of you but I’m honestly so eternally grateful that I just... I have no words almost.... I just don’t know what to say sometimes. It’s honestly so out of this world how amazing and nice some of you are even tho I’m like the complete trash of this world XD. In all honesty.... without you guys I’d probably not even be here lmao... I’d probably would’ve just went on with my life with nothing to wish or hope for other than for the next day to pass even quicker than the last.... or just for days to just over as soon as they start... I won’t say more cuz that’s shit is personal and I’m not about to write that in public 😎. But like I know for sure that without you guys. I would not be here right now. So thank you. Thank you for everything. Thank you for all the memories you’ve given me, the countless nights you’ve made me die of laughter, The countless times you’ve made me choke and almost die from how funny something would be, the countless times you’ve made me think “damn I don’t ever want to wake up from this dream if this is not real”. Just thank you, for talking to me, for letting me vent, for letting me be there for you when you were there for me, for being my rock to lean on, for helping me go through the toughest of times like if it was a normal day. Thank you guys so much for treating me like an equal, for being friends with me, for playing with me, for inspiring me, for teaching me new things and helping me with anything I could ever ask for. Thank you guys so much, and while words will never be able to fully explain what I fully mean or what I fully feel. But I hope that this at least will give you an idea of how greatfull I am for you guys... i hope this will show you how thankful I am for you guys. I love you guys so much that the word love just can’t even express how much you guys truly mean to me. You guys have changed my life for the better and even tho I will probably never be able to repay that I’m hoping that I can do something to at least return how much y’all have done for me. And even tho a lot of the people I mean by this message are not on Tumblr I have a few that are and it is for that reason that I will thank you and write something for you guys here too. So here is the part for the specific people.

@frogb, Genny :)

Genny :D

GENNYYYYY >:D

Good God..... how are you even real XD well to start off, a quick intro :).... probably my only irl friend that is actually active on this app and of course MY BEST FRIEND FOREVER IN THE WORLD AND THE #1 PERSON IN MY LIFE >:), I want to take this opportunity to just thank you again (I know I’ve said a a bunch of times and you probably hate me for saying it a lot XD, that along with sorry :(((( I can’t really control that Lmao but I’m getting better at it right :D). You....you’re my best friend :)... you have changed my life for the better way too many times cuz. I’ve honestly lost count dude. I’ve lost count. I just want you to know that even tho I said that the first thing I wrote on this post was meant for a bunch of people. I was really mainly thinking about you when I wrote it. Ever since you’ve been part of my life. You have made sure to change it completely. And only for the good and for the better. I don’t think you have a genuine idea of how much you’ve changed my life and how much you’ve made me happy :)... thank you Genny thank you so much for being the best thing to ever happen to me. Genny you truly are the best most amazing, kindest, nicest, loveliest, most wonderful, most talented person I’ve ever met. Look I won’t write my full thing here since...well I’ll say the rest to you directly. But well .. Genny... I love you... I love you so fucking much alright :D thank you for being the highlight of my life. Thank you for being you Genny and thank you for being here for me and just being my best friend in the world :)

@ritsu-in-a-maid-dress , heyyy duuuudee buddy chum buddy pal XD (don’t ask lmao), I know we like met only a few weeks ago actually idk maybe at the point when I actually decide to post this it’ll be months or like a year 😳 (and if it is HOLY SHIT WTF I HOPE I ACTUALLY TOLD YOU SOMETHING IN THAT TIME CUZ DAMN) and well so far, you have been nothing but an amazing, way too nice, handsome friend that has somehow probably one of the sweetest hearts out there. You’re actually so fucking funny and have made my day much better sometimes just from the very few talked we’ve had lmao (correction now it’s actually been quite a few 😳and honestly they’re getting to much better and funnier so thank you so much for making me laugh :D (oh and I will never forget that one call we had for 3 FUCKING HOURS DUDE!!!! THAT WAS AWSOME!!!) ) and while at first I was very shy to even talk to you. I’m happy that I can comfortably say hi without any regrets or anything lmao. I will tell you something I’m very thankful for in dm too cuz it’s kinda private :) so yeah.... thank you so much for being you and being my friend :D

@quellfy yoooooo duuuudde I don’t think we’ve ever really interacted on here but I’ve talked to you on the server and well I can know from there that. You’re just such an amazing and kind person. And that every time we talk I have a great time :)) I don’t know a lot about you but I do know that you’re an amazing artist who has amazing art (yes even when it’s not sad “pointing at alluka in snow drawing” amazing) and that you’re such a kind and I nice human being who’s been just super nice and good to me :)) so thank you. For being my friend and for being such an amazing human being :D

@faceless-dude yooooo I don’t think we’ve properly talked before but like :))) I really think you’re an amazing person and just super talented. Your art is something I’ve never seen before and I really really think it’s unique and just amazing. Thank you for your wonderful wishes. And yeah dw. I plan on keeping that promise >:) Gen will get her booties kicked just like you asked XD

@kur-upira we probably only interacted a few times. But in those few times. I could tell what kind of person you are and how much of an amazing person you are :D. I can tell you that just from those few times. I was able to see how much of a beautiful, talented (yes holy shit. I cannot stress this enough. I love your artstyle and good god it’s so good everything from the actual drawings to the shading to the colouring. It’s amazing dude. I really mean that. It’s one of the most unique and most beautiful artstyles I’ve ever seen), friendly and just amazing human being you are :))) thank you for those few interaction (which probably took me whole days to respond to because of anxiety and bs XD sorry about that lmao) and yeah. I would absolutely love to get to know you better and to interact more with each other :D

@starrynarwhale, I know we like pretty much only interacted like twice with each other but from those few times. I knew that you were a wonderful person :) not just an amazing person. But a very talented one too :D (your art is amazing dude. It’s really great. Not only that but like. Can I just say that. Your frog gon fridays are godly dude. They’re always so fucking cool and wholesome 🥺🥺I love them so much. Amazing) you seem like a very kind and amazing person so yeah :)) I’d love to get to know you better :D

@catboyyouko yooooo. I know we probably have only interacted once but let me tell you dude. You’re a wonderful, amazing, nice, kind and extremely talented human being. (Dude you don’t understand. Your art is fucking amazing. Not only that but your comics are so goddamn great too. Not just in an art way but in a story way too. It’s just always so amazing) oh and also like... I see that you vent a lot and stuff and just wanted to let you know that if you ever needed someone to talk to or vent to. I’m here for you. I feel like you’re such an amazing person and I would love to get to know you better :) so yeah. If you ever need anyone to talk to. I’m here alright :)

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE. I LOVE YOU ALL SO FUCKING MUCH

And if I didn’t @ you I promise It’s just cuz I’m too scared to bother you and @ Ing this many ppl has already made my anxiety skyrocket.

[unproduciblesmackdown]

The opposite of your last post for the ask meme! Like 1, 5, 9..

thank you lol sorry it took me a minute to get to posting these answers......i also skipped a couple that got asked previously via answering all primes lol

1: What inspires you?

hm well just basic stuff like “being in a good mood” lol or “being hyped up by friends” or “having reason to be particularly excited about something” which is all like, factors that Contribute Energy......learning about stuff / trying something and discovering like oh i’m Into this thing, or that for whatever reason something turns out to be more within reach / doable than i might’ve thought, like, hey i wanna get on this maybe.......~creatively~ it’s great to like, see other ppl’s art, and while i’ve sure been Inspired by professional artists, overall i’m more like, influenced and motivated by seeing the styles / specific works of Online Randos like me.......i also Draw to create [self-indulgent (usually fairly) niche fanart which is also probably gay and is all the time of characters i like] so like, the Stuff I Wanna Make Fanart Of (which has Whatever characters i specifically would like to draw lol) is sure directly Inspiring in that way. i’d say i never had that experience of like, ppl being kids and seeing some [distributed work in a certain art medium] like oh i want to make my own [distributed work in a certain art medium] as in like, i wanna publish a book, i wanna make movies, etc, but i guess i Did b/c i was like elementary school age in the early-to-mid 00s and experienced some instances of online fanart like :o :o wow damn ppl can do that?? just be a rando drawing fanart and sharing it w/ other people online???? and today i am living that dream, so good for me lol. and also i’d like to shoutout marge simpson anime, which is a particular piece of Online Art (technically fanart even lol) which was like, unusually Motivating as a single work of art lol, i made a notes app fanart like immediately and then a way more “painterly” piece of fanart that was v directly inspired by it lol.......and i was sure Drawing It Up last last winter when bmc 3.0 was impending / happening, b/c i got into like Just in the dec before, so that was Fresh, and then bam the Content is happening concurrently and as soon as we even just learned that jeremy has glasses i immediately spent like honestly 25 consecutive hours making fanart for that exact Inspiration. we didn’t even know abt the hello kitty shoes yet!!! and naturally im not out here for stats or clout but it is Inspiring when ppl enjoy the stuff i make and let me know one way or another. [tag comments that express enthusiasm in any way.....Appreciated]

9: Do you trust people easily, or do people have to earn your trust?

i have to say i am wary! that’s in part just like, a default anxiety defensive mode lol. but it takes me a hot minute (aka weeks....or months.....) to realize when someone like, would like to be friends or something, so while i can be Friendly and Outgoing w/ people like, immediately, i’m not picking up relationships left and right that are close enough that i’d particularly talk about “trust” or whatever. i’m not necessarily Distrustful either lol, it’s more just like, again re: the constant wariness thing. it is not unlike a cat lmao i vibe with them lol i Get that [approach]....and there’s been times i’ve been like “hmm i sure do Not vibe with this person ever and am not comfortable around them / interacting with them to any extent beyond occasional casual interactions that i don’t super enjoy. that’s me being overly anxious and failing to be personable i guess!!” and then that person Does give that reason down the line like oh, actually, that eternal uneasiness was warranted :/ damb

21: How does someone become friends with you?

yknow i was like “didn’t i Also answer this one previously” but it turned out the question i was thinking of, which i Had answered, was “how does someone become important to you” lmao.....same diff

tbh it’s kind of an arduous process lmao like. first of all i am Bad about initiating shit, and a lot of times will like, be wary of Directly Interacting with people for a while b/c i am also Bad At not being too passive / unwilling to assert anything so like, if someone’s regularly interacting with me but i’m not into it / Eventually Realize i’m not into it, it’s that thing again where my main strat is [v gradually sidle away] lol and just find it difficult to extricate myself from interactions / relationships and so that plays into me really feeling like i have to have some real confidence that i’d get on with / vibe with someone Before i start significantly interacting with / getting involved with them which....is also difficult natch lol like. can’t rly get a great feel for what someone’s like w/o talking to them.......but then if i Distance myself at all at any point will that be taken as rejection or whatever.......and then anyways say i Am talking to someone, then it’s like, also i’m just not fantastic at casual conversation always and that stage where you don’t know someone too well and talking is mostly a Polite Ritual and it’s like oh god don’t mess up, respond Normally lmaoo......i am nervous. and i also have a tendency to just naturally try to make an interaction go smoothly than immediately prioritize / feel comfortable busting out My Personality lmao.....so then even if ppl are responding well enough it’s like ah jeez i know we’re all performing always but have i shown them What I’m Actually Like to any significant degree, am i just masking it up / mirroring the crap out of how they talk?? and also it then takes me quite a while to put together “if someone keeps talking to you / choosing to interact with you for like, weeks, it probably means they want to / are interested in doing so” lol.........and then i’ll take ages more of trying to consciously Be More Myself without *also* feeling like this is too much of an act lol, and gradually picking up like oh they’re still not like, annoyed or disinterested or something..............what i am trying to say is it sure takes a minute lol

also when i Am attempting sometimes to like [initiate interaction] with people my version of being Active is still not all that active lmao i will be like [occasional Like] or [even more occasional reply] or [tag comments or no comments coz it’s twitter and im rt-ing stuff] and it’s like oh wow if we’re not having more regular interaction i suppose i’ve failed or something?? does this mean anything further lol, did i do anything.....but welp gotta have that perspective that Not Necessarily lol and i’m not the only person in the world who might not make friends or even friendly acquaintances easily / at the drop of a hat and u can’t necessarily read way into shit that hasn’t Actually been communicated to you.......naturally though it is easier to have some ~perspective~ and Serenity about all this sort of thing when you do already have some Friends lmao........been feeling (and consciously nudging myself towards feeling) More Chill about say like, friendly acquaintances i have who aren’t raring to interact with me on the reg.......ppl i’ll go months or half a year or more between having a convo with and then we’ll be like trading dm’s for a couple days and then it’s back to not really talking, and that Is What It Is, not necessarily a tragedy, and really it feels “rude” to acknowledge to myself like oh i’m not sure that me and whomever even Vibe well enough that *i’d* be raring to talk all the time either, but hey, it’s also true, i don’t have to be Validated by ppl who know me having me in their friend circles in any significant way......i be out here on the peripheral / outer orbits and i can appreciate that for what it is, even if, again, easier to be more Cool with that when i’m not Only in ppl’s periphery...........i appreciate the pal i have who like, 99% of how we Communicate is occasionally sending each other pics of our cats, not very intimate but also back when i was offline for months on end they eventually went out of their way to find someone to get in touch with to verify i hadn’t like died or anything lol........i appreciate the Gestures of Caring that ppl have and do extend, even if we do not actually talk regularly. 

and like also i’m bad at like. idk the main way i talk is again, At Some Length and often about real specific shit lol so im like woop aware that many ppl are not into that, or they might be down for having an exchange like that for a day and then they’re done.........not at all like wholly Against more lol Conversational conversations but i gotta say that’s more of a struggle lmao..........so let’s say befriending me takes some Patience. i kinda operate on [cat] rules. jellicle

25: How do you stop yourself from going back to toxic people?

i absolutely am Refraining from launching off on a ted talk of a tangent that is also me being the [the guy about to throw down a card on the pile on the table and that card pile is like “any conversation” and the guy is labeled “me” and the One Card about to be played is labeled “it’s capitalism” or smthing like that and also it’s all in spanish].jpg.......

anyways idk just try to keep things in perspective, right......i generally am pretty Passive about gradually sidling away from relationships that are bad and so by the time i Have exited them it’s pretty overdue lmao and i get to be quite confident that it was The Right Thing........and just when looking back on stuff it’s like, well if you remember the Good or “Not That Bad(tm)” parts maybe consciously think about the whole of it And specifically the Bad parts / the reasons for peacing out.......also the other day i was mulling over some standard [conflicted / complicated feelings about having cut certain ppl out entirely] and it also occurred to me that a lot of the [conflicted] feeling part came from sympathy for them, whereas from the perspective of Entirely My Own Feelings On The Matter minus that “how do/would they feel about it” consideration, the thought of never interacting w/ these ppl is like. fine with me lol........stuff like this is always Complicated and Individual and there’s certainly no like, one-stop simple Guide To Navigating All This Kind Of Thing, Cmon It’s Easy........another consideration i saw the other day via a graphic on twitter, which is probably most relevant re: say, controlling / abusive Partners, was how like, to think about how someone is acting if they’re saying you should Take Them Back b/c they’ve Changed their behavior, but to pay attention to if they’re trying to guilt you into it / justifying or downplaying their previous behavior / shifting blame and otherwise manifesting the inherently harmful and controlling patterns that are supposed to be gone now........anyways yeah complicated stuff and also just p.s. (and what would’ve been the jumping off point for the It’s-Capitalism tangential essay lol) ppl shouldn’t be blamed if they do choose to let someone back in their life like oh now they’re responsible for bringing their mistreatment upon themself.....no better than blaming someone for, say, having a harmful / controlling romantic partner in the first place like oh well they should’ve known better than to have gotten involved with this person..........ppl are in control of their own abusive behavior and shouldn’t be considered Forces Of Nature no matter how intransigent they are

33: Do you have someone you know you can always rely on?

tbt question 9 lol there’s defo some people that i do trust! love it....

45: Do you consider yourself creative?

another #tbt to question 1 lol.......i mean Yes i am creative in ways but like, who Isn’t, really.......think sometimes “creativity” means “do you like, do Art things” which, yes i do, but then within that there’s art that’s deemed more ~creative~ or w/e......not to mention that i don’t think something has to be definitively labeled an Art to be creative. like, for example, Science and Art aren’t opposites / the antithesis of each other, and anytime defines ~science~ as like, people just memorizing and outputting Facts and Numbers and considers this a distinction from Being An Artist.....wild and i Will fight you lmao. i tell you i can v much remember times i have had to completely disengage to keep from losing my cool at people arguing about “why i respect science but could only be an artist :’|” or “why Art is actually harder than Science and also we’re the underdogs b/c society values science so much more :’|” like.....mf...........anyways scientific pursuits may certainly have a different Methodology (see: scientific method) than art but lbr it still requires creativity and science and art are friends you fucking fools................and then also just zooming in on the Art-Making business here, i also like, have never had any interest in coming up with Original stories / characters and the like, and i don’t enjoy trying and it just really is not my thing, and it’s Funny or something when people wanna say that creative fanworks have value b/c they let ppl cut their teeth for what really matters, inevitably making their own original content(tm)......that isn’t inevitable for me lol and certainly is nothing i aim to do ever, and when there’s the suggestion that if you’re Good enough at ur medium you gotta manifest some of that original the character do not steal shit.........anyways i’m not pressed to claim i am an Artist(tm) or Creative(tm) lol like i guess technically i am both but i have no professional aspirations and my brain does not Do [generate original content] so it’s all like, i’m just out here.........s/o to this time i was trying to do my fuckin thing drawing on a tablet in a cafe and some random annoying guy is trying to talk and i happen to mention like “lol i don’t exactly call myself an artist really” and Guy goes “OH REALLY??? WHAT’S WRONG WITH ARTISTS? WHAT’S YOUR ISSUE WITH ART” like please cool it lmao but god p sure it was a guy who was just. very Around and very annoying in general

49: Do you feel like you’re a good person?

yeah i think i’m alright but really what is the use in like considering there 2 be achievable Good or Bad Person Statuses for everyone........let’s say it’s an ongoing, active state to be in the process of consciously choosing to be Good and working towards Better. especially considering that We Live In A Society which tries to teach everyone and continuously imbues our existence with Bad Messages about how to perceive and engage with other people, and being A Good Person is a lifelong effort and it’s unhelpful to feel that if you’re already Good or well-intentioned enough you can just dust off your hands and be like “well my work here is done” and be unprepared to examine your beliefs/actions or deal with the might-as-well-assume-it’s-an-inevitability that even if u have some noble-ass beliefs you’ll fail to live up to them at some point/s.......so like yeah lol again i feel like i am a pretty good person but can always be better and ought to be aware of / willing to work on that at any point

[lnarizakis]

— sam’s match-ups masterlist

hi! if you sent in a match-up ask, you can find ‘em all here! if you sent off anon, i have just tagged you and added the link to the post. if you sent as anon/anon with identifying emoji, i included your description along with the link. this post will be constantly updated as i continue to post my match-ups! thank you and i hope you all enjoy your match-ups!!

— @hqprotectionsquad . . .

— anon . . . ❝ could i get a matchup🥺 with 2 boys~ i'm 4'9, i'm really tiny and i've been told i have really nice hair hehe personality wise i've been told i'm really gentle and calming, i had a teacher that said my voice is "serene" and "soothing" >__< i'm the mom friend of the group🥰 i'm quite the introvert, i enjoy just staying home with some takeout, studying quietly or playing acnh underneath all my blankets.. i'm quite fond of hugs and cuddling and forehead kisses too though😚😚💞💞💞 ❞

— anon . . . ❝ could i request for a matchup?🥺 i'm about 5'3, my friends always say i'm the perfect height to hug 🤗 i have long hair till my waist that i dyed a rose-gold colour, i like wearing green or grey contacts because i like the way they make my eyes look. i have a resting b!tch face though...i'm not very approachable because of it😭 i've been playing netball for about 6 years now and i'm quiet irl i guess, but off the court and when i'm comfy, i'm quite the goodball🤙🏻🤙🏻 ❞

— anon . . . ❝ grats for 500! I'd like to request a matchup w 3 ppl pls! Im female, 5'2, i LOVE volleyball! i play wing spiker but i used to play setter, i loved setting for my besties in hs after training. I like to work out, read books & study. i clean my room every morning cos i like neat things, my closet's organized. i have dark brown eyes and thick thighs, proud of em! i also dance, im flexible, and im taking journalism. i wanna play pro vb in the future but tbh 158.5cm's too short, but im not giving up! ❞

— ⭐️ 🌸 anon . . . ❝ Hey hey! If ur still doing the matchup event i would love one!! Im a short gal with wavy dark hair and green eyes. I wear makeup p often esp red eyeshadow and black winged eyeliner (bc im an egirl until i DIE). Speaking of egirl i dress in black and with a chain most of the time but i also randomly flip into floral soft girl hours?? As for personality im really energetic once im comfortable and i love people who can match that energy, esp bc i get anxious rlly easily so i need someone . . . who will help keep me calm and happy when my drive for success gets a lil out if hand lmao. I’m also v combative towards ppl who i think are disrespectful! I love classic novels and watching foreign movies, but I also LOVE sports and get rlly hype abt them. I also LOVE music esp metal but i can and WILL vibe to literally anything esp if its during a workout (bc i live at the gym and someone spotting my squats is so romantic 2 me 🥺). A match w/ 2 boys would be sick, tysm in advance! ❞

— anon . . . ❝ Im medium height with long brown hair and sharp features. I like drawing, reading, cooking. I’m rather chill and level-headed, i’m usually the one to fix objects and solve problems, I avoid drama. I’m compassionate and caring but sometimes indifferent. I like mountains, art galleries, concerts, cello and graphic design. I’m adaptable and open to learning new things but I don’t like changing my routine too much. + 1 male character. ty for this and congrats on 500 followers!!! you deserve it ❞

—anon . . . ❝ hihi!!!! congrats on 500!! i lov ur content sm.. akfjag im asking for a two chara match up!!! im 5'3 and i have pink hair,, i switch between so many hobbies LOL i play volleyball and softball,, and i love singing and painting!! i have a really cottagecore aesthetic and i love baking things for people!!!!! im really energetic and v bratty over text but i get flustered so easily in person,, i hope youre having a good day//night !!!!!! ty for ur fics ❞

— 🐧 anon . . . ❝ match up please!!🥺 2 characters n no gender preference!! im a tall (around 184cm) kinda chubby girl w/ shoulder length brown hair, hazel eyes, pale skin w/ a lot of moles n i wear glasses! im p shy n it takes me a while to open up. but when i do i am a completely dif person,, making friends is hard but the ones i do have i love more than anything! when im w/ them im cheerful, talk a lot n goof around. otherwise i look p intimidating n serious cause i have a rbf n barely talk,, . . . im the mom friend, an optimist, a dreamer n a procrastinator. im p hard to piss off but when im angry i can get scary 😳 im sensitive n cry a lot, currently im working on being more confident! i love animals n flowers!! cause im not the best with words i use lil gifts n touches to express my love! my hobby is drawing! ive been doing it my whole life n im rlly proud of it!! congrats on 500 followers love❤ ❞

— @raevaioli . . .

— 🦆 anon . . . ❝ Happy 500 bubs! You def deserve it :)! I was wondering if I could get a #1 male matchup? Looks: 5’1 petite fem w/ small chest/tiny waist. Thick/medium brown hair and eyes. I’m a cancer with ENTP type! I’m a very affectionate person to my loved ones. I’m very stubborn, sensitive (but I try to hide it), ambitious, witty and very talkative! I like to tease my friends, watch Netflix and try new baking things! Although I show my love through actions, I’m fine with getting love back in any way . . . Also I like baths! (It’s random but why not 😌) I wish you a good day! ❞

— anon . . . ❝ Hey! Can I get a matchup? (#1)I’m a Leo and a ISFJ chick! I have medium brown hair and big eyes w/ glasses. I have a petite body with a small waist and chest. I’m really nice to people but very awkward (I’ll laugh at the floor) and when annoyed. I’m much more open to others like my best friend,I feel at home with her :,) .My hobbies include watching greys anatomy, shopping for clothes, and calling my friends. I would want my partner to be a lil more extroverted than me. Happy 500 😊 ❞

— anon . . . ❝ hi! Can I get a matchup? I’m 5’2 straight girl w/ long brown wavy hair and big brown eyes. I’m thick in all the right places🥴 plus I have a curvy body. My star sign is Pisces and I’m a ISFP. I’m more introverted than extroverted. I dress like Hobo type of way, but i always wear AF1s and I NEVER crease them. In my spare time I draw,listen to raps (mostly by Tupac) and oldies, learn raps, and hang out wit friends. I also have a bunch of piercings on my ears and one on my nose. ty CONGRATS ON 500+ ❞

— anon . . . ❝ CONGRATULATIONS ON 500 WHOOP WHOOP❣️🥺, can i please have a matchup doe! so happy to celebrate this with you❤️ i’m a female, straight, 5’4 and a half, dark skin with medium black curly hair, chubby cheeks and always smiling, i love being outside just experiencing life or trying new drinks at restaurants!! i also enjoy staying home to watch tons of anime & movies or dates to the museum or theme park, spring is my favorite season and orange is my favorite color, i’m so hyper and loving, thank you! ❞

— 🐾 anon . . . ❝ Twice the charm I suppose :) I’m a 5’1 girl with long wavy brown hair. I have a lot of piercings and I tend to wear a lot of jewelry. I wear two knee braces due to a connective tissue disorder. I’m bisexual, so either way works for me owo. I’m an INFJ and a type 4. I’m told that I’m pretty easygoing but I get angry real quick when someone I love is threatened. I’m very empathetic and I’m the mom friend of the group 🐾 . . . Fun fact, don’t leave me alone in public for more than two seconds or else random strangers come up to me asking for advice. This has happened way too many times now don’t ask me why lmaooo. I’ve been playing soccer for eleven years now. I was the captain of a coed college-age division team for two years. I play left defense and goalkeeper. 🐾 . . . I go hiking a lot, I love cliff diving, and I’m an archer. I am also a painter and a writer. My dream job is to become a book editor, but I want to eventually live off my books. I tend to be pretty clingy when it comes to people. I randomly need a lot of attention and force my friends to cuddle. They like rejecting me 😔. Sorry that this was so long aha. Ily and have a good day 💕🐾 ❞

thanks for sending in an ask ! didn’t see yours? please let me know !

[alukaforyou]

and ALSO sry to post bs on main im mostly just talking to myself in my personal tag half the time so yolo, no need to respond to this or reassure me or whatever but these days i licherally question how much of my - sry to sound like a broken record - bs is dépression or just my shité mentality, like i rly was not designed to last, huh? physically or mentally? lol. like who gets motion sickness on swings lmao anyways. i think i give up too easily. theres a bunch of reasons y but i dont feel like saying. its a different thing to kind of kno something, and to admit / speak it (confront it). i could psychoanalyze myself all day and tell u exactly why some things are the way they are but its too unpleasant to neatly state stuff like that u kno?? like... *i kno* but im not gonna say i kno. anywho, i digress. so i give up easily and kind of have a defeatist mentality too, its so exhausting lool. actually its weird cuz duality of man, i'll be rly determined / stubborn abt doing some stuff and not care abt fear of failure with certain things but when it comes to My Life / My Future i just think i cant rly do anything? i mean that literally like i got no skillz *laugh crying emoji* not particularly good at anything, and art - the only thing im maybe arguably ok at - i dont wanna do as a career, that is art therapy for me i dont feel like commercializing it. not interested in working in my major, maybe things wouldve been different if i went to culinary or cosmetology school?? that sounds fun. or if i majored in bio cuz i was so good at that, or even if i majored in japanese language or literature or idk. but no regrets tho cuz i learned a lot abt drawing in art school which i can use for myself. and hmm i like staying home and not rly going out of my way to meet new ppl so connections what? i h8 hearing how most opportunities come through the ppl u kno cuz its true and ik like 10 ppl tops so hm very sexi of me :^) i just feel like im p much f*cked and it rly doesnt help that i have no functional dreams, goals, or aspirations nor the confidence and drive to work towards anything so ah ok cool. u kno suga's songs "the last" and "so far away" ? that p much sums up my feels minus the part abt having to deal w fame obviously LOL. its so easy being a student (for me at least) but being a good student isnt really worth a whole lot in the """""real world""""" and the current education system doesnt even rly prepare u for reality or w.e like Deep Sigh also the political climate rly lookin like shité out there like hmmmmm do i even wanna try so hard to be here anymore tho??? also going back to the self confidence thing, ya idk her LOOOOL like it doesnt very much bother me tho? i really, honest to god have no idea what my redeeming qualities even are. being nice? and my mindset re - tolerance and compassion for others, etc, ya im rly proud of that actually but besides that i mean like what can i Do tho like hm im not particularly good at anything also im hideous like uglee but thats ok too like none of this Bothers me, thats just literally how i Am so ok fine, but i feel like it makes it hard for me to exist in the world i happen to be in??? and i realize im speaking with a huge bias here cuz my brain is totally out of whack im p sure if some1 saw me / read this they would lit be like um u literally do not have it hard girl, which is fair ur kinda right actually from an objective pov, probably? its amazing how um. hard? of a time my brain is having given my relatively ok circumstances but thats just how it is ig. and if i may quote shakespeare - o full of scorpions is my mind. and its weird cuz duality of man - i actually have a lot of good times w friends and whatever i have a lot of fun, im not even very Sad or in Agony its all very a mild? sensation? but that might be because my plan b is to simply *** so nothing rly fazes me anymore lool.

its usually a v confusing emotion, im either feeling happy, or if not that, very ???? im literally that duwang quote get a feeling so complicated its just "ajdjsjsja" idk its not overly repulsive and upsetting im like :s LOL u kno wat at this point idek what im even saying anymore but its good that im writing whatever cuz im gonna need to look back on this later and organize my thoughts for presentation cuz remember i have a s.o now???? i wanna let them kno so we r on the same page, and i dont feel like im tricking them, i thought it over more and there are like 4? major cards i wanna lay out on the table early on and they are 1. im not that close w my family emotionally so do not seek their approval or expect to deal with them much. 2. personal ideology / political views like im bi lmao and pro lgbt if that wasnt obvious also i dont rly wanna be around racists / terfs etc and if ur right wing or not on that respect women juice uhhh bye.. 3. my weak ass mentality how i might Maybe *** in the future like no promise but errrr theres one more but its a little more negotiable and also too early to discuss so i wont mention it but i already got the first two outta the way so ya. theres the most troublesome of all, #3. the last thing i wanna do is traumatize someone that loves me (and i love back) with that kinda thing, its too late for my dear friends whom i love, sorry i didnt kno i was gonna be like this LOL yall already got attached but its a little different with my s.o cuz i feel like its not too late to uh.... stop getting as attached LMAO like dam i've known my girls for almost 10 years whereas i've only known my s.o for like a month.

and this is totally not gonna come across right but if my s.o very understandably desides to dump me id be SO RELIEVED LIKE WOOOO ok cool cuz like essentially what i'd be saying is you are getting attached to someone who's future is not as stable as other people, including u. *huge exhale* from the bottom of my heart, my bad lol. and then i probs wont ever get involved w. a s.o again, sorry to reference snk in 2020 but remember how e*win smith is single cuz he doesnt kno when he will ***? big mood. i have never acted out on my interests before but i was like ok for once lets go off the shits and do smth ooc, i uh... didnt expect for it to actually go anywhere tho so now im like ???? i shouldve thought it through more tho, like i felt low key irresponsible af and selfish and dumb for getting involved w. someone even tho i Know how I Am like...... Also i just lov being single and staying home and chilling alone lmao like i seriously...... never get loney....

ok so what was i talking abt? how the passage of time makes me nervous cuz idk how i can manage to keep up w it??? how i feel like i cant do jack shit???? that life is hard???? and maybe a bih just wants to rest? permanently?????? i think the most irritating part of all for me, like what i am most mad about at myself is that i have no dream. yikes. naruto, do u think thats sad? well yoongi said its okay, and what counts is just being happy, so i will console myself and forgive her and idk just try my best for the time being??

[queer-starling]

Flower ask: also all of them. you get to suffer with me >:3€

oh darlin’ we’re in it now huh

Alisons: Sexuality?

homogay

Amaranth: Pronouns/Gender?

she/they | all gender will be shot on sight

Amaryllis: Birthday?

sept 23rd

Anemone: Favorite flower?

monkshood

Angelonia: Favorite t.v. show?

stranger things or ghost adventures

Arum-Lily: What’s the farthest you’d go for a stranger?

like? distance? a couple miles probably

Aster: What’s one of your favorite quotes?

“We are such stuff as dreams are made on, and our little lifeIs rounded with a sleep.” William Shakespeare, The Tempest

Aubrieta: Favorite drink?

wild cherry capri sun

Baby’s Breath: Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

ima change that to ‘kiss the last person u thought abt kissing’ bc YES

Balsam Fir: Have you ever been in love?

*jenna marbles voice* hell yeah!!

Baneberries: Favorite song?

waiting for the end - linkin park 

Basket of Gold: Describe your family.

chaos

Beebalm: Do you have a best friend? Who is it?

i have too many to list !!! brandi, kasey, you, liz, ivy, nick , just to name a few!!

Begonia: Favorite color?

blue uwu

Bellflower: Favorite animal?

foxes !! and opossums

Bergenia: Are you a morning or night person?

night time babey

Black-Eyed Susan: If you could be any animal for a day, what would it be?

either a fox or an opossum or a raven, i think

Bloodroots: When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?

i wanted to be a vet !!!

Bluemink: What are your thoughts on children?

theyre ok as long as theyre not screaming and/or mine

Blazing Stars: What are you afraid of? Is there a reason why?

i don’t liike vomit bc. nastey (trauma i think) and i don’t like old ppl well. i dunno why? they’re just so old and fragile and helpless and sometimes they’re really mean and idk i think it’s like something to do w death or something LMAO idk. also i just hate the idea of becoming old and having to rely on other people ?? hhh

Borage: Give a random fact about your childhood.

i was bullied a lot

Bugleherb: How would you spend your last day on Earth?  

realistically? probably playing dead by daylight with my girlfriend ADFSGRHYUTR

Buttercup: Relationship Status?

happily taken 

Camelia: If you could visit anywhere, where would you want to go?

ireland, scotland, alaska, greece

Candytufts: When do you feel most loved?

whenever my friends or family tells me they love me but esp when u text me goodmorning or when we say our goodnights sorry im gay haha

Canna: Do you have any tattoos?  

i have. uuuuhh 6

Canterbury Bells: Do you have any piercings?  

no!!! i want some tho :(

California Poppy: Height?  

i think im like. 5′5 or something? give or take an inch ?

Cardinal Flower: Do you believe in ghosts?

oh absolutely. my house is haunted as we speak

Carnation: What are you currently wearing?  

bmth hoodie and pajama pants w foxes all over them. i just woke up lol

Catnip: Have you ever slept with a nightlight?

yeah i always keep one on in the bathroom

Chives: Who was the last person you hugged?  

my sister bc she came home from college yesterday

Chrysanthemum: Who’s the last person you kissed?

ask me in like. a little over a month from now ;)

Cock’s Comb: Favorite font?

FONT??? the animal crossing font

Columbine: Are you tired?

oh absolutely

Common Boneset: What are you looking forward to?

thanksgiving, christmas, seeing my gf, magfest

Coneflower: Dream job?

idk if it’s a job but i just wanna own like. a ranch that takes in all sorts of animals and takes care of them

Crane’s-Bill: Introvert or extrovert?

introvert 

Crocus: Have you ever been in love?

ooooh yeah

Crown Imperial: What’s the farthest you would go for someone you care about?

i mean. depends on what they want/need. distance wise? i’d travel the known universe for u  

Cyclamen: Did you have a favorite stuffed animal as a child? What was it?

he was a plaid teddy bear his name was Stanley!!!! i miss him :( but now i have Little Moon God as my favourite stuffed animal 

Daffodil: What’s your zodiac sign?

Libro

Dahlia: Have you done anything worth remembering?

Working in Yellowstone is something I’ll never forget

Daisy: What do you feel is your greatest accomplishment?

well. hmm. i was gonna say flying to yellowstone but maybe driving to north carolina by myself bc driving long distances alone to places i haven’t been before gives me hella anxiety (i’m better now)

Daylily: What would you do if your parents didn’t like your partner(s)? 

i don’t pay rent in this house to listen to their opinions lmao. 

Dendrobium: Who is the last person that you said “I love you” to?

you, i think, when we said goodnight last night!!! EDIT: you this morning!!

False Goat’s Beard: What is something you are good at?

being bad at dead by daylight

Foxgloves: What’s something you’re bad at?

dead by daylight

Freesia: What are three good things that have happened in the past month?

(little over a month now but uhhh) GOT A UH ......GIRL.....FRIEND ...... GOT TO VISIT GIRLFRIEND ........ and got the windshield finally replaced in my car 

Garden Cosmos: How was your day today?

i dont know! so far ive laid in bed now im at my computer answering this. not too bad. my shift is only 4 hours today. 

Gardenia: Are you happy with where you’re at in your life?

for the most part, i’m pretty content, yeah

Gladiolus: What is something you hope to do in the next year or two?

MOVE OUT 

Glory-of-the-Snow: What are ten things that make you happy/you’re grateful to have in your life?

my friends, my mom, my sisters, my girlfriend, my bastard dog

Heliotropium: What helps you calm down when you feel stressed?

metal   

Hellebore: How do you show affection?

what does this mean. physically, i’m very affectionate, i just. don’t show it alot bc anxiety/i overthink. that and i constantly tell ppl i love them and what they mean to me 

Hoary Stock: What are you proudest of?

whoever is reading this

Hollyhock: Describe your ideal day.

wake up next 2 a cute girl. take way too long to get up. go climb mountain w cute girl. vibe on mountain w cute girl. go to waffle house 2gether. gome home and vibe. play video games or watch a movies/tv w cute girl.  

Hyacinth: What do you like to do in your free time?  

i like to make art or play bideo jame

Hydrangea: How long have you known your best friend? How did you meet them?

oh gosh i dunno. the ones i’ve known the longest are kasey and brandi, and i’ve known them both around/over a decade i think. we met in middle/highschool!

Irises: Who can you talk to about (almost) everything?

you, ivy, liz

Laceleaf: How many friends do you have?

so many 

Lantanas: What’s the best compliment you’ve ever received?

idk man but i remember when you said u had a crush on me and then i posted a selfie and u were like ‘OH NO SHE’S CUTE” and like ??? idk i think that was definitely the first compliment to ever shock me LMAO 

Larkspur: What do you think of yourself?

6.9/10

Lavender: What’s your favorite thing about yourself?

my tattoos

Leather Flower: What’s your least favorite thing about yourself? 

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kGGViLwHEUk

Lilac: What’s something you liked to do as a child?

i liked to play zombies ate my neighbors on the sega genesis !!!!

Lily: Who was your best friend when you were a kid?

eliza !!!! we lost touch a few years after i moved away :(

Lily of the Incas: What is something you still feel guilty for?

ima be real everything makes me feel guilty

Lily of the Nile: What is something you feel guilty for that you shouldn’t feel guilty about?  

aaaaaa the whole abi/moon incident 

Lupine: What does your name mean? Why is that your name?

my name is fox. it means i like foxes

Marigold: Where did you grow up? Tell us about it.

northern virginia babey !!!! that place fucking sucks!!! but everyone who lives up there thinks they’re hot shit. 

Morning Glory: What was your bedroom like growing up?

i had a bunkbed and i think the walls were pink 

Mugworts: What was it like for you as a teenager? Did you enjoy your teenage years?  

😬 i’m just gonna say i’m much happier now and i’m coping with life and shit a lot better  

Norwegian Angelica: Tell us about your mom.

she’s sweet and funny and i love her so much!! she always does the Most for everyone, sometimes to the point where she isn’t concerned abt herself and i see where i get it from. but yeah my mom is great, my dad doesn’t deserve her 

Onions: Tell about your dad.  

source of a lot of trauma and why i have so many issues regarding men. i don’t wanna talk about him anymore LOL he doesn’t deserve the attention

Orchid: Tell about your grandparents.

my dad’s mom is becoming senile and i think she’s racist and queerphobic. my mom’s parents disowned her a few years ago so we don’t talk to them anymore 

Pansy: What was your most memorable birthday? What made it be so memorable?

i dunno. i don’t try to remember my birthdays. whenever i can go to busch gardens for my birthday i usually have a lot of fun there. 

Peony: What was your first job?

if you don’t wanna count working w my mom as a florist, target was my first job back in 2016. i found my name tag the other day , actually

Petunia: If you’re in a relationship, how did you meet your partner(s)? If you’re not in a relationship, how did you meet your crush/how do you hope to meet your future partner(s), if you want any?

WELL, i know you followed me on here first. and then twitter?? but we didn’t really start talking until stranger things 3 came out (thank u stranger things) PHYSICALLY, we didn’t meet until fursonacon (haha. i remember when u texted me that u got to the hotel and i came down to help n i saw u unloading yr car and it was then that my brain was like OH NOOOOOOOO and my heart was like OH YEEEEAAAAAAAH) 

Pincushion: How do you deal with pain?

physical, mental, or emotional? i play a video game or listen to loud music

Pink: Where is home?[

somewhere in appalachia i can feel it in my stupid soul 

Plantain Lilies: If you could go back in time, what is one thing you would stop/change? 

idk man i’m pretty content w where i’m at now so 

Prairie Gentian: Who is someone you look up to? Describe them.

chester bennington 

Primrose: Describe your ideal life.

i have a waife and we have many great pets and we live in a log cabin in the mountains or in a nice victorian in a small town or something IDK but we’re happy and that’s all that matters 

Rhodendron: What is something you used to believe in as a child?

God

Ricinus: Who’s the most important in your life?

my mom, me best friends, my girlfriend

Rose: What’s your favorite sound?

my girlfriend’s laugh because it’s THE cutest shit and then when she giggles??? oh my heart 

Rosemallows: What’s your favorite memory?

oct 23rd, 2005, we brought Fat Boy Zack home !!!!

Sage: What’s your least favorite memory?

July 22nd, 2016. i was 2200 miles away

Snapdragon: At this moment, what do you want?  

to be holding my girlfriend >:(

St. John’s Wort: Is it easy or difficult for you to express how you feel about things?

hhhhhhhhhheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Sunflower: What is something you don’t want to imagine life without?

those i hold dear

Sweet Pea: How much sleep did you get last night?

enough, i guess? 

Tickseed: What’s your main reason to get up every morning?

my girlfriend

Touch-Me-Not: How do you feel about your current job?

it’s fucking BORING and TOO EASY and they don’t pay me ENOUGH but i can get away with so much shit there so ima still go, ima still go 

Transvaal Daisy: What’s your favorite item of clothing?

all of the flannels currently in my possession

Tropical White Morning Glory: Describe your aesthetic.  

mountains, woods, forests, cabins, autumn, cryptic, occult, victorian, edwardian

Tulip: What would be the best present to get you?

if someone gets me a gift i’m legally required to execute them

Vervain: What’s stressing you out most right now?

this 40hr workweek i got coming up 

Wisteria: How many books have you read in the past few months? What were they called?

i have not read in So Long

Wolf’s Bane: Where do you want to be in life this time next year?

Moved out away from here lol, we’ll see

Yarrow: Do you know what vore is?

:/

Zinnia: Give a random fact about yourself.

i’m a furry

that was SO LONG im sorry i also put you through that but THANK YOU ENJOY READING ILU

[k4nill]

ROTTMNT: Human AU, some design HCs and random HC

@bootyyshaker9000 This is so long i'm so sorry i just gonna make a post about it i don't wanna flow your dms or anything, so I wrote this down in paper and in spanish so forgive me if my english is shitty and it took so damn long, btw HI!!!~ How you doing honey?

My Heart Ache a Lot (cuzhessopreciousicantbrah)

~ My son Mikey I can't let anybody hurt you. (Btw, Leon call him Miguelito). He struggles a little with puberty, mostly with ocasional acne. His brothers constantly remind him of being careful to not get scars from pinching the pimples obsessively.

~ MIXED BRAH U CANT' TELL ME OTHER WISE, 1/2 cups of african-american and 1/2 cups of latino spice and PUFF yOU GOT CINNAMON ROLL THAT COULD ACTUALLY KILL YOU.

~ Cocoa skin (with that yellow undertone, you know?). Thin hair, curly, natural and the most bouncy-est(?) hair, a little above the chin lenght, tied up in a bun when he's busy making art.

~ Button nose, surrounded by some freckles. With really big, almond eyes. His face gets pinkish when it's to damn hot, he's doing to much work or is REALLY angry.

~ I think I gotta bring up how nice his smile is, he got that smile, that shows up just his upper teeth row, the upper lip disappears and it goes way up his cheeks and then it sinks in his dimples. Art.

~ Mikey ain't that young but his height, complexion and even facial features makes him look a lot younger in comparison to his brothers, he could be like 25 and ppl would still think he's in highschool, never aging ppl.

~Had this beautiful dreads, with the tips colored differently once in a while. Now he's growing his hair to have larger dreads, so he can paint em a different color each and have em in high up-do, like a rubberband ball.

~ Mikey would wear every fucking color, get the fuck away with toxic masculinity p l e a s e. Fits anything 10/10. But loves sports clothing (Matching ones are the BEST) he find's it refreshing and really comfy since Miguel is really active, so if he's needs to go usain bolt he GOES OFF and you can imagine sneakers don't last with him. Probably, every single piece of clothing he owns has at least a minor stain from some sort of paint.

~Wears headbands, sometimes really neat designs and then straight out "what the hell is this vomit stain garbage Mikey?" (from Donnie, mostly).

~ Has fake piercings. He's got several in his ears. He wants to have em for real, older brothers just keep telling him that "when he gets older".

Plus: We all know how the turtles are sneaky sneaky, tricky tricky and rad skillyz skillyz being ninjas but in this human AU his brothers got nothing on him like he's flexible as hell, he comes down the stairs like the exorcist bitch or that other bitch on the ring and scares the shit out of Leon and Raph, can touch his calfs with his neck that kind of stuff. And he doesn't run, he travels back to 1955 to save Marty McFly ass.

Leonardo DABinci

~ Not so long ago I made a post about how Leon is a Latino, quote:

"I can clearly see how Leon is totally a Latino. Like: thick wavy hair, with really small monolid eyes, and medium light skin (latinos know what the hell i'm talking about, those kids that get told they have "ojos de chinito" and rock the neapolitan tanning: caramel where the sunlight hits, milky way where it doesn't and pink when it's too much sun for the day) and then Donnie is this asian™ bean, so, sometimes they are mistaken as blood related brothers (Mostly cuz the eyez) and the stripes are the tanning y'all."

~ In addition, recently someone WOKE™ me up and reveled to me as in a prophecy, that Leon is Half-Chilenian, Half-Argentinian.

~ TBH yall, i just want my boy to do his thing and do them Fornite dances while some dope ass cumbias are playing, this is straight up my dream for real.

~Leon got those damn thick eyebrows more than Raph, plucks em to give em shape.

~Has a lot of scars. Leon is very active as Miguel but he is a troublemaker. Got several scars from fights: face, knees, knuckles, arms, legs. And that one time he came running to get his juice, slipped and smashed into the stove glass.

~Has wavy thick hair, keeps the top messy and fluffy and the rest shorter, undercut typo.

~LEON. USES. GLASSES. Period. But don't use em regulary, mainly cuz he's so active and sometimes clumsy and would rather not buy glasses everytime he goes out.

(Donnie, probably): "Leon, why don't you use your glasses? You are making your eyes even smaller trying to read that sign"

(Dumbo): "No, no! que dices weon? I only need the glasses when i'm reading!"

~Loves stripes in his clothing. In any shape and thickness.

~Low-key uses Donnie button up shirts because he does think Donnie looks so well in em, but he's a little more broad than him (Thicc bacc, bicc arms) so he had tear some up, or pop a button or too.

~Guy who would wear anything and don't give a shit if he doesn't have a defined style. One day he's with that graphic tee, flashy bermudas and some sandals and the other day using some jeans, saggy big sweater, a beret and some fine boots.

~ Loves boots more than sneakers. Got good traction with em. But no one can replace las CHANCLAS i'm telling you, he's so comfortable flipping & flopping.

~ He's hairy. Really hairy. Don't shave, except the faice. He's got that baby face and the trace of where the beard could be. It ain't that thick sandpaper beard aftershave tho, Raph taught him the tricks to the silk road.

~Them sideburns tho, neAT-O.

~He ain't got former training, just some random stuff he's learned from Donnie and Raph. Nontheless, he's the trickster and can go dirty on fighting just to save his ass. But sometimes, his big mouth saves his dumb ass from trouble. (2/100 times, the other 98 times it makes it worse)

~Plus: He's into parkour a lot. Takes Mikey out so he can tag some walls uphigh. These trips are the reason he gets in fights more than his other brothers, he's gotta stick out for his brother in case shit goes down, but mostly because he's a loudmouth and sometimes he deserves it cuz he starts the fire tbh.

The thing goes RAP - PHA - PHA

~ Raph, my soft boy. He still BIG™, ain't ripped like a physiculturist, gotta admit, abs are in fact chocolate abs but got a chunky yet funky tone to it. Big ass arms, to strong to carry my depression and smash all my worries.

~ Obviously African-American, I just imagine this warm undertone to his skin. Thick eyebrows (plucks out his unibrow, and nothing more, that natural angled eyebrow perfect as it is).

~ Hairy complexion (but not as hairy as Leo) to pull out a balbo beard, faded to his hair, then starts the faded high top, (not that high tho) with that cotton natural hair (raph is just my dream tbh).

~ My boy rocks denim everything. But got this particular worn off denim jacket he treats like one of his extremities. It's kinda saggy, old, several splashes of god knows what substances... But he wears it like the most precious thing, his brothers got him for his birthday, selling candy bars and other sweet goodies. Made him cry like a bitch.

~ Snaggletooth fang. I got this random HC that Raph got it in a fight with one of his brothers when he was younger. His first tooth after his decidious teeth, he was so happy, finally "maturing" in his words. In his younger years he struggled a LOT with angry issues, (mainly, as the oldest, he understood a little big more about the rejection above the city for mutants, and built up this feeling of despite).

One day, one of his brothers made him really fucking angry, they got in a physical fight, that ended with his crooked fang, but yet, Raph is BIG and he can't measure his strenght sometimes. Then, his brother is crying in pain, screaming how bad can he treat his brother, as if he didn't love them, just as the people above.

He wasn't angry cuz the teeth (cuz he showed it off, like it made him an adult already), he broke down because he was always feeling so damn angry, being the oldest and yet he was beating their younger siblings over some dumb shit and treated them like people in the surface would. Raph is challenged each day, when he sees his face in the mirror, with the tooth projecting outwards as reminder of all the rage he had to let go to protect their brothers, to make a change on his perspective and emotions, to keep their family and himself happy.

I think this mind set change was the thing that settled Raph as a leader. He got stronger, not physicially, but mentally and emocionally, for the sake of his family.

This HC can be translated somehow to the Human AU but i'm not sure the origin of Raph's rage yet.

~ Would wear any shirt that has anything he likes, PLUS if it is in red. He just loves red. He's the only one obvious with their color preference. Red caps, shirts, jackets, pants and tons of sneakers.

~ Likes jeans but loves that kind of bermuda cut shorts and not all the way down pants. He's got some C A L F S with capitals.

~ Luckily, he does wear matching socks. (We can't see Don's most of the time but Raph shows more leg so).

~Wrist wrist wrist wrist wrist wrist. Loves wrist accesories and probably would wrap around anything on his wrist.

~He's got that classic™ Rock Lee from Naruto bandages from training and work out and sometimes he's just to tired to take off the shin pads.

~Don't show em much but got some big ass brass knuckles in his pockets in case someone messes the fuck up with his brothers. (He would easily let go if it was just him, he's a master of templance, but be warned: not with his family)

Plus: Got one tatto, in his back, below the neck, this celtic rune (we know that celtic runes have several meanings, so he took one with various that would fit him) a Gebo, that can mean partnership, generosity and sacrifice.

DONNA TELL EM

~ For starts, Donnie is my asian bean. Creamy pale skin, monolid eyes, with that puffy under eyelid, of course noticeable dark circles, but he got that EYESMILE BOI. (You know that people who kept straight face but the eyes are just screaming happiness??? That kind of eyesmile)

~ Hair black, thin, straight cut (his hair is kinda wavy) at his shoulder's lenght, got that fade styling in the back tho, usually wrapped in a high ponytail/bun. (Mikey loves to mess with his hair).

~ He's got that thin eyebrow hair, so, he fills em up to make them thicker, so gives him more of an assertive feature. (Also he is jealous of Leo and Raph eyebrows, nontheless edge so sharp to cut a bitch) Got that hairless complexion so not much about facial hair.

~ Obviously keeps them THIGHS™. (So far, to me their complexion on the show is the same as in the human AU so... ) Jeans were invented to the sole purpose to fit Donnie so well.

~To wear, jeans are a go to, but damn sweatpants comfy AF. Big old sweatshirts, swearters and hoodies. Underneat, digs button shirts, short or long, never with flashy prints, yet some minor deco, (to him is all in the elegance....). Raph and Donnie share an interest on sneakers, so he can wear like 1 hoodie for 10 days straight but a different sneaker each.

~But wears missmatched socks like the fuck out of here BOI, looking neat and clean and you come out with this yeeyee ass bullshit.

~ Donnie hides the fact that he's riPPED under the hoodies and sweatpants often, (he's tall as shit and his brothers calling him spagethi bOI don't help much) so people make the assumption he's the weakest of his brothers. He's the only graduated on black belt on Karate and knows his shit on MMA. On his younger years he was indeed saved many times by Raph's strenght, Mikey's swiftyness and Leon's cunning. This "being the weak" complex got to his head and started training solo. His brothers are amazed of Donnie's self-improvement and he often disguises it as the "i did it so i wouldnt be the weakest, you better watch out when i supass yall" but they all know he suffered inmensely seeing his brothers hurt because of him, so if they go down he does too, to protect them.

Plus: Complementary headphones with neon designs, blasting nightcore, dubstep and DnB songs with every Donnie purchased.

BG:

In my AU, these kids grew up really poor. They learned the value of hardwork since they were really young. Like in the Teetle Universe, people see them as misfits. Especially, because they are a "patched up family" (they are not blood related) and being looked down by the economic factor, mostly.

They got some real internal issues. But, the only thing that keeps them sane is how tight their brotherhood is.

Donnie and Raph have a job and go to college. Struggle a lot with their younger siblings rebellious stage.

Leon and Mikey go to highschool and do some baked goodies or art comissions to have some sort of income. Ain't fond of school that much, real troublemakers.

April it's a freshman in college and has much more accomodated life, but somehow, she's always felt she doesn't belong to anywhere, until she meet our boys. April learns a lot of life hardships while hanging out with em.

This would be, basically the series:

April meets this guys, this is sort of a slice of life anime, with lots of comedy and fun shots, however it develops around April learning valuable lessons that will help her as an adult, about friendship, loyalty, respect, empathy and kindness, after all the things the boys are going through.

I'm not sure how am I gonna accomodate Splinter in this, but eventually I'll figure it out.

I'm not got at drawing but i'm gonna try to make some of their designs.

[mysteli]

No Tears Left To Cry (Flynn X MC)

A/N: Hey ppl! So this is my first entry for @i-dream-so-i-write‘s Choices September Challenge! I’ll be posting daily fics all month! The first scenario is Rain! This is For Flynn and Ali! You can suggest some pairings if you want! Hope you’re ready for this! Tagging the blog @choices-september-challenge

Warning: T

Tags: @mechaspirit @xo-endlessmayhem-xo@endlessly-searching-for-you@princesstopgun @parkerattano @skyila @brightpinkpeppercorn 

Nikolai wasn’t kidding. He couldn’t have been. There is no way Ali just saved a murderer. Hints and clues always seem to lead back him but no, he couldn’t have hurt Kate. Drugged her, kidnapped her, tortured her and killed two Sterling siblings. It doesn’t seem possible for someone who actually cares about Kate would go through all that for revenge.

Some many questions corrupted her way of thinking, as she darted out of the lighthouse, after unofficially parting with Naomi, Grant and Flynn. Honestly, Ali feels awful running out of there so fast, just after Nikolai was dragged out and everyone was contemplating on what comes next. With everything happening around her, Ali just couldn’t take it anymore. She’s barely handling the situation already and saving a possible criminal just doesn’t sit well with her.

Truly, she’s exhausted, troubled, on edge and completely out of breath. For the past few days, her entire lift has been flipped upside down and the longer she stays in Birchport, the more her city life becomes a distant memory.

The rain’s still pounding heavily once she makes it outside, drops smacking the concrete and drifting down Ali’s face. As she approaches the docks, her mind drifts back to the others, especially Flynn with him being held at gunpoint. Out of everything that happened, that’s what frightened Ali the most - a chance that Flynn could get shot. Nikolai was so close to pulling the trigger, yet Flynn remained so calm and collected the entire time. It’s almost like he had been through that before and due to past experiences, he knows how to handle situations like that, which is kinda concerning for Ali. Flynn and the others are the only ones she feels like she can trust and losing them just feels unbearable.

Suddenly, Ali can feel tears rising in her eyes, corrupting her vision as she fights through the heavy rain. She pauses half way down the docks to catch her breath, as she leans against the railing, her dark eyes staring out at the ocean. The monstrous waves floor every parked boat, soaking each and every one. Clouds hover over the events, watching how the sea curses every vessel with its power.

The scene is horrifying but somehow strangely soothing. Exhaling sharply, Ali relaxes, the tension in her softening slightly and finally giving her a chance to forget the events of tonight, even if it is only for a short while.

However, it doesn’t last long when Ali hears a familiar voice calling out to her. “Ali!” The voice yells in a desperate tone. Reluctantly, she swerves around, tearing her eyes away from the thrashing waves. She catches sight of Flynn pacing over to her with a rare look of concern on his stupidly handsome face.

Flynn has been her hope all this time, the only one that cares about Kate as much as she does. Turns out, they’re both really different from each other. He’s a bad boy who defies the law and only does what will help the ones he cares about. He always knows what to do and has a smirk that could kill anyone who gets too close. Then there’s Ali, who is a lost journalist, who spends most of their time in the city, not in small towns like he does. She’s not as capable in dangerous situations and barely holds her own but she still knows what the right thing to do is.

Deep down, she knows everyone who knew of their “relationship” would judge. The disgust on everyone’s faces at Kate’s hearing, when Hornby called her out like she’s a slut. Even Flynn’s face was full of surprise, which is what hurt the most.

Her doubts start to shine through as she contemplates their situation.

She doesn’t eye him for that long, fixating her gaze on the silver railing that she helplessly leans on, as she waits for Flynn to reach her. Eventually, he does, sooner than expected. Still, she refuses to look at him.

“Ali…” Flynn mumbles, putting a hand behind his head and fiddling with strands of his dark brown hair. His icy eyes scan over Ali intently - an anxious look overtaking. Still, Ali doesn’t give him her attention, keeping her eyes on the gloomy clouds that poison the sky.

Flynn exhales loosely, one hand gently tapping Ali’s arms, which startles her a little and causes her to jump where she is. “Ali… Why’d you run out like that?” He tries to question her but he’s given an eye roll from her instead, which makes him furrow his brows bewilderedly. A bullet stabs her heart when she catches a glimpse of the hurt in Flynn’s eyes because she wasn’t talking to him.

His grip on her arm tightens, just enough so it doesn’t hurt her. “Ali! For god’s sake, look at me!” Flynn requests firmly - though there is still a hint of kindness in his tone. He tilts her chin so she’s staring at him dead in the eyes and that’s when he finally spots her rising tears. “Ali, what’s wrong?” He questions again, fiddling with her trembling lip while trying to help her relax. Affected by his surprisingly gentle touch, she inhales sharply.

For a moment, a silence is caught between them, Ali taking that time to admire Flynn like she does every time they talk. He’s completely drenched from the pounding rain, drops continuing to soak his hair and drift down his pale face. They surround his sapphire eyes, highlighting them and making them stand out. Tears of the clouds have also moved to wet his clothes, making them tighter against his fair skin. As her dark eyes aimlessly scan his body, she swears she can see his chiselled figure through his soaked shirt, as his dark jeans grip tighter to his legs. Flicking her eyes back his face, Ali begins to contemplate on what she should say.

“I’m sorry, Flynn,” is all she manages to blurt out of her mouth, which is kinda random since it has nothing to do with Flynn’s question. Expectedly, it confuses him and he can’t help but raise an eyebrow at her.

“What’re you sorry for?” He asks in a concerned tone, stroking the skin of Ali’s shaking arm comfortingly and it sure is working.

Ali silences herself for a moment, only then just realising what she actually said. Her mind goes blank and total honesty seems like the only option. “I… Do you think I just saved a criminal?” She bombards him with a question of her own, desperation hinted in her tone. Her hazel eyes are drowning the impatience. She just needs an answer. Was what she did right or wrong?

Flynn pauses, releasing his grip from Ali’s arm and placing both hands behind his head. He stares out at the ocean, eyes fixated on the guarded lighthouse, watching how the huge light flickers like it’s broken.

For too long, he doesn’t dare speak, worrying Ali a little, as her stomach ties into a knot. “Flynn…” She mutters and his icy eyes snap back to look at her. He throws his hands to his sides.

“I don’t know.” He admits, stroking his jaw thoughtfully while shrugging his shoulders. He looks distraught and defeated. “I just feel like once we get close to knowing the truth, something always drives us back to the start.”

Hearing his words, Ali frowns, playing with the ends of her hair. “So, you’re saying it’s undecidable?” She asks, furrowing her eyebrows in a confused manor.

“I’m saying that I don’t wanna assume anything in case it comes back to bite me in the ass. Everything else always does.” Flynn responds, grasping the railway and fixating his gaze on a nearby boat named The Saviour. Ali follows his gaze and is instantly intrigued by the title of the vessel. “Damn, we could one of those right about now.”

Ali nods, watching how the waves rock the boat and it almost builds up a little nausea in her stomach. Quickly, she looks away and moves her gaze to Flynn, who’s still admiring the shaking boat. “Remind you of something?” Ali questions, noticing how interested Flynn is in the name of the vessel and it’s entire exterior.

Barely hearing her question, he tears his eyes away from the boat and finds Ali in his sight once more. “Guess you could say that.” He admits, folding his arms and sighing heavily. Something is troubling him.

Ali places a hand on his drenched shirt. It’s surprising how the constant rain isn’t bothering him at all, even though it’s killing Ali on the inside. Flynn flicks his eyes over to her and his nose twitches as drops of rain descend down his face. “You know you can tell me anything, right?” Ali assures, brushing his drenched hair out of his face. Giving in to her touch, Flynn sighs hesitantly and wipes the dripping water from his face.

“My parents used to have a boat just like that,” He begins, focusing his attention back on the boat and Ali does the same even if it makes her slightly sea sick. “And it was actually called The Guardian Angel, which kinda reminded me of The Saviour.” As he tells this story and relives his childhood, Flynn can’t help but blink a few times to stop a few tears from escaping. “Kate loved it. She used to go on it all time with Dad. He’d take her fishing and she always used to come back with something. Each fish she caught she had a name for.”

Ali giggles at the thought of Kate naming fish that she caught and talking to them everyday, causing Flynn to pause and eye her questioningly.

“What’s so funny?” He asks, cracking a weak smirk and chuckling to himself and Ali can’t help but laugh along.

“Kate told me about her favourite fish once. What was her name… Tunalicious?” Ali reminds Flynn and they both break into a fit of laughter. It’s easier to smile for Ali when she’s around Flynn, despite everything.

Flynn smirks wider this time. “Yeah, she thought that was so clever. She’d talk to him almost every night and feed him peanut better like Lilo did in those Disney films.” He jokes, running a hand through his drenched dusty brown hair. A sigh of relief escapes him, as he realises he hasn’t laughed this much in a long time. Only Ali seems able to help him do that.

A lightbulb suddenly goes off Ali’s brain. “Ooh! Let’s not forget Goldilocks and Sir Swords A Lot. And Dracula!” She laughs, breaking out into a wide smile and Flynn immediately joins in with the banter, the memory brewing in his mind.

“I kept trying to tell her that a fish with a two sharp bottom teeth does not means it’s a vampire.” Flynn responds, one of his first genuine smiles igniting through the storm, immediately stopping Ali’s laughter and gaining her attention.

Once the laughter dies, they just stare at each other for a moment, admiring each other’s imperfect states. Not just the exterior of each, the other’s strengths and weaknesses, good traits and bad traits, good flaws and bad flaws. Either way, they would never think differently of the other.

“Then my parents went and sold the boat, completely killing Kate.” Flynn adds suddenly, completely killing the mood as well. His kind grin fades away, as he focuses on the boat once more, almost cursing at it under his breath. “For a while, she felt broken, lost and I couldn’t help but blame my parents for that. They destroyed their own daughter and treated us both like black sheep.”

Suddenly, a unbearable memory revisits Ali’s mind and it sends immediate shivers down her spine. That thought of the sight of Flynn being held at gunpoint by a mentally tormented Nikolai. It was horrible to watch and even more painful to relive. The bright smile she once held fades away and the light in her eyes dies completely, leaving her looking empty and pained.

Interrupting the silence, Flynn blinks a few times, checking that Ali is still there and watching how the heavy drops of rain sink through her scalp and soak her beautiful face. “Ali?” He asks, receiving no response. “Ali… what’s up?” He tries again, once again rewarded with complete and utter silence, frustrating him a little.

Ali closes her eyes for a moment, contemplating hard. When she opens them, she can see the confusion in Flynn’s eyes. “Nothing. I gotta go.” She claims, not giving Flynn a chance to protest. Immediately, she swerves around and continues down the docks, not in the mood to confront Flynn about her darkest fears.

“Ali. Ali, wait!” Flynn calls to her, the desperation in his face causing her heart to sink. All he could wonder is what he did wrong. “Goddamit, Ali! Stop walking away from me!” He pleads, no sort of demand, just the rare, no impossible, sound of him begging. Ali wipes her tears away, pushing the memory of Flynn to the back of her mind.

“What did I do? Where are you going?” He continues to bombard her with questions as he attempts to run after her, getting closer even though the rain seems to slow him down. He remains careful and cautious so he doesn’t slip on the already pretty slippy docks.

Finally, after seconds of struggling, he reaches Ali. Instantly, he moves to block her path, stopping her directly in her tracks. He can see sobs pouring from her cheeks and it definitely wasn’t the rain.

She tries to slip past him but he grasps her shoulders and keeps his grip nice and tight. “Flynn, move out of my way.” She orders firmly, brushing her wet, auburn hair out of her face, as she tries her best not to admire Flynn’s soaking state.

“Not until you tell what’s got you so on edge.” Flynn denies, shaking his head at her and exhaling sharply - puff of smoke corrupting her vision momentarily.

“Flynn, it’s just me being stupid. Now move!” She demands, pressing her lips together and arching her eyebrows at his dismissive attitude to not let her go.

Once again, he shakes his head, his icy blue burning into her tear-infested hazel eyes. “I don’t believe anything you say is stupid. Now come on, Ali. Be honest with me.” His words came out as more of a kind-hearted request this time and that soothes Ali slightly but frustration still lingers in her eyes.

“Goddammit, Flynn! Move your ass now!” She snaps, tempted to shove him but hesitant to hurt him. Judging by her poor strength, she wouldn’t be able too anyway but she still cares about him.

“Not until I get an answer!”

“Okay! You want a fucking answer, Flynn! I’ve been putting everything on the line to save Kate! My job, my dignity, my reputation. Hell, even the people that I care about!” Ali admits, raging uncontrollably. Her hands ball into fists and her mind is scattered with unwanted memories. Flynn’s eyes widen slightly and his mouth drifts into a frown. He’s never really thought about what Ali’s troubles were. That sounds bad but he was just so focused on his sister and he always relies on Ali’s help that it just… may have slipped his mind.

“Ali… I had no idea. I didn’t realise-“

“Yeah well, it’s get worse!” She cuts him off, barely keeping her balance and relying on Flynn’s strong grasp to steady her. “Nikolai could have killed you today. You could have been shot and maybe I wouldn’t have been able to save you.” Tears begin to rise again and her hopes fall into a pitch black abyss. “I love Kate just as much as you do. But we keep risking our lives just to ensure she’s safe. I know that sounds like I don’t care but I do. I really do. I want her out of jail. I want her to be free… but I also don’t wanna die trying.” Ali confesses, sheepishly staring at the floor and refusing to meet Flynn’s unreadable gaze.

For a moment, nobody speaks and nobody moves. It’s impossible to process what’s happening, especially Ali’s words struggling to sink into Flynn’s brain. She clarified that she cares and she made sure Flynn knows that she loves Kate. She doesn’t wanna watch the people she cares about die. And for some reason, that includes Flynn.

Finally, Flynn clears his throat, causing Ali’s eyes snap up. “Wow. I’m sorry if I ever made things difficult for you. That was never my intention. I really am sorry.” He apologises, his words sitting well with Ali and she smiles at him weakly.

“Flynn I-“

Before Ali can form any proper words, Flynn cuts her off by thrashing his lips against hers, causing her to jump up in his embrace. Startled at first, her hazel eyes widen at the surprise of his touch. But after a moment, she melts into his embrace and smiles against his lips, finding a way to kiss back. Usually, their kisses would start off sweet and reassuring but something is different about Flynn this time. He’s bringing more force and urgency than he ever had. Like he is in dire need of her. Was it the anger or… no it’s the anger.

Flynn immediately creates a flowing rhythm, snaking his arms around Ali’s waist and drawing imaginary shapes on the fabric of her coat. She can’t help but let out a soft moan when he begins tugging the strands of her soaked auburn hair that drifts down her back. Hearing it, he smirks against her lips, able to taste the raindrops on her mouth and tongue, as she lets his own in. A pace and a fuelling amount of passion builds up, giving them both a sense of relief.

The growing storm in their bodies is even more powerful and bigger than the one outside, as the rain continued to drench them, only adding more fuel to the fire. Flynn forcefully pushes Ali against the railing, groaning lightly when she playfully tugs on the strands of his drenched dark hair. Another smirk crosses his lips and he starts moving to kiss down her jaw and over her neck, gaining a few soft moans from Ali, which is insanely satisfying for him. She strokes his arms, outlining the tattoo on his shoulder, then moving up to his neck. Noticing, Flynn releases his lips from her neck and squints at what she’s doing, slightly intrigued.

“What ya doing there?” He questions, shooting her his signature smirk and she doesn’t dare remove her hand and continues stroking his tattoo.

She glances up, smirking mischievously at him, which turns him on more than you’ll ever know. “What? Can’t I admire a man’s tattoos?” Ali questions, arching her eyebrows seductively at him which makes it very hard for him to hold back.

He plants a kiss on her forehead, then moves to whisper in her ear. “Guess not.” He mutters huskily. With that, Ali grips him by his soaked shirt, pulling him in for a long, lingering kiss - this time it’s more tender and sweet but still plastered with desire.

Too soon, she pulls away, aggravating Flynn. “I wasn’t told we were stopping.” He claims, raising an eyebrow at her and groaning in annoyance.

“Seriously? Can’t you see I’m soaked and it’s also freaking freezing?” Ali reminds him and Flynn smirks at her words, brushing back strands of her hair and planting another kiss on her damp forehead.

“You still look gorgeous.” He replies very smoothly, causing Ali’s heart to flutter. Hearing that, she leans in closer, teasing him by brushing his lips against hers but still not enough to satisfy Flynn.

“How about a hot shower?” She teases, becoming suddenly even more irresistible to Flynn, which he didn’t think was even possible.

He raises an eyebrow at her and briefly brings his lips to hers. “Sure but only if you promise me one thing.” Flynn responds and Ali eyes him questioningly.

“I’m not gonna beg.” She states simply and her eyebrows collide with each other, as she awaits Flynn’s compromise.

Flynn chuckles softly, before forming a serious expression and staring into Ali’s hazel eyes. “Promise me you won’t beat yourself up over Kate anymore.” He requests calmly, taking both Ali’s wet hands in his and kissing each finger one by one.

She doesn’t seem to notice because she gets so confused over his words. “When did I ever-“

“Promise me.”

Flynn stares at her, a glint of hope in his eyes. Just being here with him and staring into them makes her feel at peace and tells her that everything is gonna be okay.

“…Okay, I promise.”

[unscramblingtheliberalarts-blog]

Aydelotte’s Social Media Weather Report: Niche in Small Liberal Arts Colleges

I’ve been compiling posts that contribute to popular discourse about the insularity of small liberal arts colleges. Their “nicheness” has for the most part on Tumblr received praise. For some, the liberal arts college “bubble” ensures a safe space that galvanizes, not stymies, spiritual growth:

oceansofbliss:

I just want to go back to my liberal arts college where everyone is nice and no one is very discriminatory and I live in a happy bubble of accepting joy

(emphasis added)

gryffindored:

the family that i created through my theatre degree in a small, liberal arts school in new england will never cease to amaze me. in times of tragedy, we are always pulling together and making magic happen.

(emphasis added)

theprettypatriot:

But my private school of less than 2000 is where I learned who I was and what I stood for. I figured out that life was absolutely what you made it, and that at the end of the day you are solely responsible for your happiness. I learned that losers quit when they’re tired and winners quit when they’ve won. Most importantly, I learned that it wasn’t your failures, but how you responded to them that defined you.

(emphasis added)

dandelionbreaks:

“The purpose of a university is to engage in dialogue, debate, and exchange ideas in order to try and come to some meaningful conclusion about an issue at hand. Not to shut ourselves off from ideas we find threatening.” — Charles Negy, Professor, Says Students Showed ‘Religious Arrogance And Bigotry’ In A Letter Later Posted On Reddit, emphasis added

Other students spoke of how liberal arts college’s insularity and small class size was a real and significant factor in the college decision-making process:

sunnystrong:

When conducting my college search, I looked for small liberal arts colleges (because I prefer smaller class sizes, and more interactions with professors) with a strong biological science or neuroscience programs (because I want to study those subjects), and Mount Holyoke ended at the top of my list. (emphasis added)

whatcomesnextisstrange:

Calvin’s general population tends to be the sheltered kind that don’t get out enough to really understand the real world, though as they spend time on Calvin’s campus I hope that that is changing. The students that come that don’t have the Dutch CRC background are slowly making differences, whether it be because the discussions they get into tend to be more political or philosophical, or that the general population of the United States is just getting more and more depressed and therefore hopefully more and more introspective.

... I’ve found great people here, not necessarily the people my parents thought I would find of course, their idea of a good friend is basically a robot anyways.

(emphasis added)

marilyns-child:

Then one day, while I was struggling with my decision between the two, I asked my mom for advice... She told me to apply to our local state university for two years and then I could transfer to a liberal arts college. We fought for days over it, but I eventually gave in.

I never made it to the liberal arts college.

...

I lasted a year and a half in college, following everyone else’s dreams for me. I took sixteen credit hours, worked two jobs, and started on a downward spiral that ended with me crying in a professor’s office, telling him I couldn’t do this, I couldn’t continue on. I was drunk, my hips were bleeding from having cut myself, and I hadn’t eaten in two days. By then, I had changed my degree to English ( “You can be a teacher!”) and there wasn’t a second of college I liked. I was miserable in a state school of thousands of students, being taught by professors who didn’t know me, and studying something I didn’t want to.

...

Sometimes, most of the time, following the money isn’t the answer. Following your heart often is.

(emphasis added)

Several posts delved into how the culture of insularity allowed for more open discourse about sexuality and pornography:

chongthenomad:

the awesome thing about the college I go to is that during one of my classes we were playing two truths and one lie and one girl was listing off the facts about herself and the last thing she said was that she was a stripper, and it turns out she actually was one but the thing is no one had any weird or disgusted or creepy looks on their faces, everyone just smiled and nodded and our amazing teacher even asked her where she worked and then she smiled at her and told her how convenient her job was since the strip club was not too far from campus and wow i really love my school

cyandie:

not being in the insular bubble of liberal arts school for several months now has made me even more vitriolicly opposed to porn because i forgot how average ppl really just talk about it and are so unopen to negotiating why [the industry is] heinous! ...

On the other hand, the same “nicheness” that was praised for bringing about a close-knit community also garnered criticism. Some posts touched upon the “liberal,” “left-ist,” “socially mindful/sensitive” stereotypes of people in liberal arts colleges: 

surfcommiesmustdie:

one of my brothers teaches poli-sci at a small liberal arts college in illinois and my dad was telling me he went full cultural marxist. he used to focus on latin american politics but now he’s knee deep in gender stuff and other assorted social justice crap.

i advised disowning him

snout:

person: *holds elevator door open for me*

me: lmaoooo wow, virtue signaling much…? i bet you think youre just SUCH a good person. Oh sorry, did i trigger you? LOL. tough shit, the real world isn’t just a big liberal arts school. uhhh yeah, I’ll take the stairs, THANKS. 😏

Other critiques possessed a less facetious vein, noting the ironic social alienation that such insularity produced:

no-identity-land:

Honestly I’d so love to try and find some new friends or something more through an app or site like Her or Tinder or something, but my campus is ridiculously small and in the middle of nowhere, and my self-esteem can’t handle the thought of rejection (and the inevitability of having to see one of these people all the time on campus) so I’ll just pretend that I’m the one choosing to stay single and save myself the embarrassment lol

(emphasis added, Tagged: lgbt, gay, lesbian)

man-of-prose:

“This is what the real, no-bull- value of your liberal-arts education is supposed to be about: How to keep from going through your comfortable, prosperous, respectable adult life dead, unconscious, a slave to your head and to your natural default-setting of being uniquely, completely, imperially alone, day in and day out.” - David Foster Wallace, emphasis added

Another crucial criticism was the lack of access to the general public about academic theory that such insularity inexplicably reinforce:

hedevitoanditsown:

college/academia and various sub-cultures (punk, metal, regional cultural destinations like Portland, etc.) should not be the only avenues for which we recruit people into radical spaces. ... put your theory into practice and teach people the value of solidarity, mutual aid, etc. these people won’t take communism seriously until you divorce the cold-war rhetoric from the reality. starting up food not bombs in your liberal arts college town full of upper middle class liberals isn’t going to get us very far (not that feeding people who are vulnerable is a bad thing).

... 

i think in order for the left to succeed, we need to overcome two major hurdles:

we need to make our theory less confusing and more accessible (breaking news: academia isn’t appealing to a lot of people and neither is theory that’s barely comprehensible. people have more important things going on in their lives, like putting food on their table and caring for their kids/families, than to try and figure out wtf derrida was saying)

we need to actually put our theory into practice (at least the stuff we can immediately, like we don’t need a full-scale revolution to practice mutual aid and democratic decision-making, etc.) and use it to HELP people who actually need it. think black panthers pre-COINTELPRO. because as we’ve seen the political elites of BOTH parties have left the working classes out in the cold to starve, they’re scared and irrational, so fascism is a logical leap for these people.

(emphasis added)

inqilabi:

Women participate in their own silencing. That’s the tragic part. Our own self regulation. We are raised to silence ourselves, become smaller, less visible. Then when women become feminists, you see the same crap… Except it’s got some name of some theory attached, and it’s taught in liberal arts schools or what have you.

Insularity is clearly a multi-faceted topic in discourse about liberal arts college culture on Tumblr. Small class sizes are praised for fostering an often intimate, sympathetic community and opening academic discussion about publicly stigmatized subjects, such as sexuality and porn. Yet, the “nicheness” generated from a tightly knit population does not prevent experiences of social exclusion or loneliness, which students (in this case from the LGBTQIA+ community) have found themselves struggling with. Nor does it solve the issue of general inaccessibility to sociopolitical theory and academics taught in higher education.

[pepucz]

Tagged by @nyarisu to answer 21 questions and then tag 21 people I’d like to know better.

Seriously I’m too awkward and shy to tag anyone here, but I really do appreciate to be tagged and I love filling in such questionnaires, it's one of my weird kinks 😂 I don't expect anyone to read it, but as it makes me happy to fill it in, I will do it anyway, it's not like I care too much if anyone reads my stuff or not 😃

________

Nickname: Pepu, in czech "psíček Pepu" (sort of like 'doggie' Pepu, but imo English is not sufficient enough to truly express the way it is in Czech 😅), my longest running nickname is "Pepča"

Real name: Petra ~

Zodiac: Capricorn (truly suits me in most interpretations)

Height: 173 cm

What time is it: 18:52 🇨🇿 at the beginning and 20:06 at the end 😅

Favourite musician: Linkin Park, D, Ed Sheeran, SIA, Imagine Dragons, The Prodigy, Mikolas Josef and Ofenbach are the most prominent ones when I look at my music folder, but my music taste is pretty difficult to pinpoint down to just artists as I usually have just a few songs from different interprets, sometimes only one or so... I love 80s/90s music, I love modern music, I could listen to almost anything as long as the melody or text fits me, be it metal, rock, pop or whatever 😊

Favourite sports team: I don't have one, I'm not really a fan of sports on TV (even though I do sometimes root for 🇨🇿 hockey team when it's some super important world match 😅 My dad watches it and I caught myself watching and being happy when they won 😅 but that's like once in a few years)

Other blogs: I have only this one 😊

Do I get asks: Nope, I've never even expected them and I don't really mind 😅

How many blogs do I folow: 101

Any tumblr crushes: Nope

Lucky number: 5, 7, 8... Not really lucky but they keep on appearing often in my life since my birth in various shapes and stuff

What am I wearing right now: Oversized comfy home blue T-shirt with the text 'Average dog is still better than most of the humans', it was a gift from my mom and it expresses myself very accurately 😃 I sometimes sleep in it too 😅; strangely patterned grey ugly but very comfy sweatpants with pockets and comfy white fluffy hand-made socks because I'm cold as hell (I usually hate wearing socks at home but the cold was more unpleasant than my discomfort with socks 😅) and also compressive stocking on one leg as I'm recovering from a surgery of varicose veins I undergone 1,5 months ago 😃 And seeing how I listed literary everything I have on very detailed, I have to add I have panties on too 😂😂😂😂

Dream vacation: Universe, I wish I could see this beautiful planet from the space with my own eyes ❤️ That's truly one vacation where I'm sure I will never get, so it's truly a dream one. From the real ones here on Earth it's Japan as number one and then pretty much way too many places to list them here as there is so much beauty to see and so little time to make it everywhere with my possibilities. I keep visiting Japan as one of my goals in life.

Dream car: Don't have one, I prefer to be the passenger so I can listen to music and daydream to my heart's content, that's what I love the most about traveling especially if it's long distances 😊

Favourite food: Food. 😂 Hard to list, I'm very picky but also very fond of food, I would be definitely a Gluttony from the 7 deadly sins 😃 I have to eat almost always something even if I'm not hungry 😃 I just love food. But to pick something: Pizza and Raffaello sweats are among my 🔝 probably 🤤 Also I'm more fond of salty food than sweat ones but I need them both to follow each other closely during the whole day XD

Drink of choice: I live everyday on camomile teas, drinking several of them during the course of day in my favourite 0,5l mug 😂 Other than that I enjoy water alone, herb teas in general, Coke and protein drinks. Wine is my special pleasure drink but only within a close company, I almost never drink alone as I'm not able to drink too much by myself and I would feel super sorry to waste the rest of the bottle away.

Languages: Czech, English (even though my grammar is not at all great, I make a lot of mistakes and I'm too afraid to talk in it now because my spelling abilities sucks - I don't have much opportunities to talk with someone, still I'm loving the language deeply and often even think in it), I tried to learn Japanese and German, but I always gave up... it really bugs me a lot, but it's not like I'm making any effort to change it 😅

Instruments: I used to play the guitar as a kid and I always wanted to play the piano, but I was too lazy to maintain it or start with it. So I can't play anything anymore now. Also just btw my singing abilities are non-existant too (not that it would stop me anyway when my favourite song is on the radio 😂)

Celebrity crushes: Asagi is probably the only real one I seriously fell in love with. Tom Hiddleston, Ryan Reynolds, Keanu Reeves, Adam Driver and Tom Ellis are my crushes ❤️ But since my childhood I was always aiming mainly on fictional characters (when I was a kid it was Sonic the hedgehog 😂). My biggest, longest and deepest love interests/obsessions/ were Kurama from Yu Yu Hakusho, Hao Asakura from Shaman King, Deidara from Naruto and L Lawliet and Near from Death Note. These keep my heart content since the first time I got to know them and I've never grown tired of them. Recently I returned my full focus mainly on L Lawliet (I always focus on one of them at time) and more or less on Near at the same time and for the past month I've been constantly loosing sleep and all my free time over scrolling on Tumblr for interesting headcanons, trivia, facts and stuff on them, re-reading manga, re-watching anime over and over again ❤️ I just can't satisfy my hunger for information on them now... No regrets tbh 😅❤️

Random fact: I used to do belly dance in a local known dance group for more than 10 years, but the older I got the more my introverted self couldn't handle the stress of performing in front of people, so I quit. I still love dancing to no end, but now I only dance occasionally in clubs hidden among lots of other ppl with my close friends around me. (I would never go and dance alone even if I was totally drunk, I'm super self-conscious 24/7)

__________

So yeah, to whoever would read this all and getting here, congrats 😅 and thank you ❤️and sorry for any mistakes 😅

Whenever I'm answering such stuff or commenting on something I can never keep it short and simple especially if it concerns me 🙃 I have a love/mostly hate relationship with myself and these questionnaires make me feel more at ease with myself when I fill them up as properly and deeply as I can 😅

I might delete this whole post later as it's quite too personal to be on a public site like Tumblr, but I will leave it here for now just because I put too much effort and time into filling it 😃

[alien-origins]

Since school is over now and exo are gonna kill us soon with a comeback I thought why not do a follow forever and appreciate some people I think everyone should check out!

Idk if there are any rules for this but yeah I’ve been a kpop(exo) blog for probably a year or less but i’ve had this godforsaken blog for years. I have done a lot of dumb tag yourself memes and dumb edits that resulted in 1.8k followers. I’ve also met and talked to a whole lot of amazing people and I did want to shine some light on these people that make my life a little less horrible and never fails to make me smile!  💞 (this may or may not also be a huge post of me telling ppl how much i love them) 💞

First things first my one and only bro @slavemin ! like bro you always make me laugh with our dumb convos on messenger ily 💓💗💞💞  if you like Junmyeon and cool exo stans then you should really follow. And bro you’re like so soft and amazing can’t wait to die with you @ MAMA 2k17. I also want to do a shout out and tell y’all to check out his youtube channel because wow it’s pure gold and the video he made for me for my bday is like a daily routine at this point it was the best gift I’ve ever gotten. Ily bro, no homo.

@1adyluck my wife, the mother to my future puppers. 💞💓💗💖 You’re probably one of the first people I actually like got to know and I will never forget the drunk asks about daddy Kris like damn I loved you at first sight baby and you kept tagging me in pics of him and I look forward to raise 12 dogs with you. I really love talking to you and you put such a bright smile on my lips and i feel all bubbly and soft.  💘💘💘  literally you’re soooo wonderful I’m so lucky ??? wouldn’t even trade you for yifan’s dick and you know how big that it of me to say.

@04gf girl, I went through our old messages before and we’ve really talked about a lot? We’ve gone through so many topics and I’m really glad we talk because baby you’re so amazing and such a good person. It feels secure to talk to you and you’re literally so cute and i want to make sure you’re happy💞💓💗💖 thank you for being there. 

@ohunshine my baby girl, my child... first things first i don’t deserve your love you’re so soft and pure 💕💝💖  I really love talking to you (and I’m really happy you found nu’est I’m such a proud mother like wow) and I hope you will come to me whenever you need to talk because I want to help you out. never stop being yourself and don’t listen to any snakes trying to ruin your day. You deserve the world and keep working hard and it’ll be yours! But don’t forget to take breaks and take care of yourself, I don’t want you to be sad or to hurt so remember to sit back and take a few deep breaths. Ily darling💖💖 @crownkingzyx  idk for how long we’ve been mutuals but I remember @/yixingshome tipped me about your blog and I was not disappointed !! and really you’re amzingly chill and I was kinda scared at first because I thought you were cool and I was nervous like always! You’re still cool and you boosted my embroidery self esteem a lot and I want to say thank you x17836 for that ily! 💝💝  ily girl and dang I love talking to you (I’m however sorry for dumping au ideas @ you all the time please don’t leave me) 💕💗💗💞💘 @swaggyt-enthusiast you need to stop with all the zitao before I die I’m a soft swaggy T stan and you’re ruining it :/// (lol but no never stop he’s so beautiful i love the both of you) girl you’re so fun to talk to I never not laugh unless we talk abt more serious things but you’re really amazing don’t forget that. Like you’re huang zitao level amazing 💖💓💞💞  thank you for making my dash a little better and that you make me smile 💖💞💞💘 @kai-aaah sis !!!!!!! I remember I was like really scared of talking to you god I wanted to talk to you but it took some time until we did finally talk and I don’t regret a thing because now I have a wonderful friend and sis :((( 💓💓  it’s always good t hear that you’re doing okay and it makes me happy talking to you and I remember when you sent that “happy best friends day” message I cried it was so cute and god I wish I could’ve hugged you and given you like flowers and braid your hair ily so much 💕💗💞💞💖  @chogiwapark I remember the day we started talking very clearly because I was stuck in school since there was a snowstorm and I thought you were so funny and your love for Luhan is amazing. I enjoy talking to you like I remember after watching the great wall and I was high key a mess and it was nice to yell abt him for a while with you darling ily 💘💘💗💖💞 @bunmyun we haven’t been mutuals for that long either but i still love you and I was so hyped finding out you lived in the nordics. And you’re a beautiful soft suho stan and that’s itself is amazing 💘💗💞 you’re like really funny as well and a hella nice person to have a conversation with! @bulba-suho-r  girl, first of all I’m sorry for dumping shit loads of au idea’s @ you and I still remember that dream where the government told you you had to change your url it was really weird actually i think an ostrich was there as well I never mentioned that detail. ily and i love our talks 💗💓💓💝💖  you provide me of junmyeon and I go through that giant krisho post you sent me now and then and cry. You’re fantastic and never stop being your beautiful funny self 💘💘💘 @princeksoo you’re my beloved child and even if we don’t talk that often it’s really nice talking to you and ily honey so a special shout out to you as well! 💕💘💗💗💞

            💘 and now for general blogs I love seeing on my dash💘

another special shout out to @deathbykaisoo we just started talking but damn I’ve seen you on my dash for so long and your blog is so beautiful and you’re really relatable ily 💕💗💞

a-h: @baeksoup  |  @bright-black-blunder  | @bitchasschanyeol  |  @bvllshts  |  @bomrin-chaebom  |  @cuntykai  |  @cutebaekhyunnie  |  @death-by-jongin  |  @dumblets  |  @duizhangdeluxe  |  @dazzlingkai  |  @exoblesso  |  @galaxychen  |  @huangzts  |  @hztaos  |  

i-p: @icybaozi  |  @irpsychotic  |  @joon420  |  @junmyeonstuff  |  @junmyeonet  |  @koimi  |  @k-suho  |  @kardsine  |  @kimsov  |  @minseoksfav  |  @milkeu  |  @niniandnoodul  |  @official-willis  |  @prankchanyeol  |  @prankchanyall  |  @preciousyeri  |  @pcystuff  |  

q-z: @sakura-gucci-panda  |  @sighboring  |  @slayeol  |  @suhomoodboards  |  @silencesneeze  |  @sulair  |  @sonicdae  |  @ttaengu  |  @tinyjunmyeon  |  @taos-left-eyelid  |  @taonsil  |  @vvu-yi-fan  |  @wheatleyoppa  | @xwxke / @jinsflower  |  @xiukitty  |  @xiaoluxury  |  @yowlie  |  @yubyul  |  @yeriprotectionsquad  |  @yeogibuteora  |  @zyex  |  

123: @4-velvets  |  @7deer-ofthe-dawn7  |