#potato rants

[potatoqueenpal]

No Milo fallout yesterday because I'm fucking him. Violently, shall we say. As I'm typing this, we're on our 45th round. The dick shall be shriveled and dried up like a rasin. I will have this man panting harder than a dog in the summer heat. The neighbors will know his name in 20 different languages, and I will not stop until my Pucena Canata memorizes every vein and inch. Every position that is possible on this earth will be researched and used. Thank you for coming to my Ted talk.

[gunghopotato]

BRO! Was that ending a fucking season 2 teaser???? Fr? On god?! Just like that??! My fucking HEART, BRO!

Such a great show 😫

I cry

Please watch Scavengers Reign, if you haven't already. 10/10

[jokerthepotatouwu]

In celebration of finally finishing RE6 with my friend yesterday, I've decided to share a little something. Presenting...

QUOTES I HAVE SAID/THOUGHT WHILE PLAYING RE6 CHAPTER 5 CHRIS CAMPING AS PIERS

"Wait, am I hitting it?"

"Get the fuck down, bitch!"

"It's so hard to aim like this when it's up there."

"Piers, I know it's hard to control lighting, but please aim a bit better."

"I have to use your screen to see if I'm hitting it because I can't see like this XD"

"How does he still have half an arm left? Bro should have no arm."

"Oh shit, wait, I can heal on my own! That's so cool."

Friend: "Did you just pick up my herb?"

Me: "Yes..."

Friend: "Fucking... Can you at least open inventory?"

Me: "No..."

Friend: "Then why did you pick it up?!"

Me: "I'm sorry it's a reflex by now...! Q∆Q"

"I love how when he's closing the door, the claws go right through it. It's so obvious that Piers wasn't meant to be the one opening doors here XD"

"God damn it, stop dying- oh wait no, that was me, okay."

Friend: *dies because they didn't want to heal they had 5 pills*

Me: "Fucking heal! You had the herbs!"

Friend: "Naw."

"I can't see shit on this TV."

"He looks so goofy when he's healing Chris with his mutated arm like that."

"Captain, get up! I need you to stab this thing when I crack its cocoon- oh wait, I can do it myself."

"Man has no stamina left."

Me: *enters dying stage*

Friend: *heals me with a syringe instead of a pill*

Me: *proceeds to get killed before I can even get up*

"I keep confusing R2 (physical attack) and L2 (slide), I'm sorry!"

"Fucking bombers!"

"That's gay."

~~BONUS QUOTE FROM MY FRIEND AFTER WATCHING PIERS BASICALLY KILL HIMSELF~~

"That's bullshit."

[asteroidtroglodyte]

It’s crazy how there’s so much misinformation about Food. The thing we need all the time. Arguably the point of getting up each day. Fucking food. You’d think educating our young on this central component of life would be the sort of thing we’d teach them as kids, but nooo, I have to go reading up on zookeeping techniques for keeping and feeding large primates in captivity to get a straight fucking answer about carbon and phosphorus sourcing instead of a bunch of pseudoscience or fatphobia or classism or racism or just good old fashioned taboos! [Chews furniture] HOW DO YOU DEMONIZE THE POTATO

[anxiouspotatorants]

Rory liked Dean but she didn’t love him. She liked going on dates with him. She liked that he’d spend time with her and watch movies with her and get along with her mother. But there was no fire, no matter how much she wanted there to be one. She couldn’t burn like she did for exploring the world and the written word. She couldn’t burn for him.

Rory loved Logan but she didn’t like him. She loved his freedom, his adventurous spirit, his lust for life. She loved how she could let herself go with him, put faith in something dangerous and not shatter. But she didn’t like how cruel he could be to others. She didn’t like how dismissive he was, of responsibilities, of consequences, of people’s hurt. She didn’t really like him.

Rory liked Jess and she loved him. She liked that he liked the same stuff as her, liked that he’d help out his uncle without bragging, and talk with her friends, and throw literary challenges at her because he genuinely wanted her opinion. She loved his honesty, his integrity, how he’d leave her speechless with his gaze and breathless with his kisses. How he looked at her, all of her, and never made her feel like she was lacking. She liked and she loved him. And it scared her shitless.

[leosgreyfringe]

[On scoring his first derby goal] "Yeah, it's an amazing feeling, especially if it gives you the win as well. I'm just happy for everyone, we worked so hard day in and day out."

LEANDRO TROSSARD for TNT Sports

[batwynn]

I typically have a pretty healthy respect for farmers and their work, especially having lived on and worked on many different farms growing up. I've woken up at 4am to milk cows, feed chickens, chop wood. I've pulled more weeds than you can imagine, tilled rows, and run out in hailstorms to protect crops. But I can't seem to dredge up a drop of respect for the farms around where I live these days. Because these guys don't actually do anything, and yet have a serious attitude about how much of better a person they are because they 'work hard' and 'kids these days don't wanna work' yadda yadda. They've convinced themselves and everyone around them that they work like people used to work on farms. In the field, backs bent, heavy lifting, etc. Except, you know, they don't. Everything is mechanized, and more than half of the year is spent doing nothing at all while the potatoes grow/over the winter. Every step of the planting, watering, spraying, harvesting, and storing process is run by a machine. The tractors don't even need them to direct them for most of the process. I've watched these guys fart around on their phones and pick their noses for 6 hours as the tractor goes back and forth, only waking up enough to turn the thing at the end of the row. For what isn't mechanized, (kale) they hire migrant workers to do the actual work. Meanwhile, these guys drive around in their un-used-for-anything-but-driving pickup trucks, yelling about migrant (non-white) workers and people asking for 'handouts'. Ironic, of course, because every single farm up here gets massive 'handout' from the government for multiple claims of u w u growing pwoblems. These same people will pick apart every single thing that you do 'wrong' because you don't do it the way they do it. (Like have a giant bulldozer to clear their driveway vs a small snow blower) If that wasn't enough, these aren't the neighbors that I grew up with. These same people have the ability to help others, and won't. They pull up to you after 5 months of grueling shoveling and clearing the driveway of snow and say, "Oh we could have done that for you for $40." And then never offer to do it next year. They'll stand outside and crack jokes about how our house is going to burn down because of how we set up the pellet stove, but not offer advice. They'll happily run their generators and settle in during the bomb cyclone that turned off the power for over a week at -60º and not even question if they should check on anyone living around them. They're greedy, selfish, lazy, cruel people and they say the kids are the problem?

[notcryingtoday]

HEXTECH WASN'T THE PROBLEM.

The AU has A LOT OF VARIABLES. Heimerdinger's whole story is about realizing time is very tangible and people are suffering when he's trying to go carefully: in this universe, he came three years before we see what it looks like and obviously he did good! He has the knowledge! He knows what's happening in Zaun! He was kicked out of the Council because OF PEOPLE SUFFERING.

The destruction of the flat caused the animosity between Zaun and Piltover to really become a problem, but there at least one kid was confirmed dead. Piltover IS BLIND. They don't notice what's going on in Zaun, they refuse to see the suffering of those people! But now, a litteral kid died because she was too poor and had to steal. I think it might have woken up some people to have it happen under their nose, where they can't pretend it doesn't exist.

Maybe Caitlyn also died and even Jayce who, despite being from a least important House, was still sponsored by the Kiraman.

Hextech was meant to be for the people but we know the main thing it did was make the rich even richer. Maybe this made the gap between Zaun and Piltover even wider but hextech isn't the problem, people are, especially those from Piltover and the Council.

Also Silco and Vander became a team again AND IT PLAYED. Silco was already important in Zaun but he's part of Zaun's downfall because of the shimmer. Here, him and Vander just... Contributed together to Zaun's future. Vander's guilt was eased by Silco's forgiveness, Silco stopped being a little bitch and realized Zaun doesn't need a leader and remembered their dream before it got corrupted. Powder was there! Felicia said "You're going to create that cool world for my daughter" and they did, only this time it's for Powder instead of Vi.

When Heimerdinger came back I believe HE INSTANTLY teamed up with Vander/Silco!

ANYWAY HEXTECH WASN'T THE PROBLEM. THE PROGRESS IN TECHNOLOGY ISN'T THE PROBLEM. IT'S PEOPLE AND SOCIETY.

(Well, I mean it played for the giant anomaly out of fucking Evangelion but you get my point, the problem isn't progress but how that progress was reserved for the riches and because Jayce sucks at politics and the other bitches around him let the scientist take WAY TOO MANY DECISIONS just because he's hot and talks good)

[aniseandspearmint]

Part of the reasons the sudden sharp increase in costs of fast food is so terrible, is the food is mostly awful now.

Taco Bell tastes like old cat food smells, and it's NEVER hot anymore.

MacDonalds tastes like it was reheated in the microwave just before you bought it. Burger King is pretty much the same. And Wendy's too.

Checkers joins Taco Bell in the NEVER ACTUALLY HOT team, and Popeyes changed all their recipes to weak ass not actually spicy versions.

Subway has had multiple ingredient scandals, and the bread is like trying to chew a yoga mat.

KFC wants over 30 bucks for a bucket of chicken and sides and their mashed potatoes taste like glue now.

Crystals? The gimmick was tiny tasty burgers CHEAP, now they cost just as much as Wendy's.

Arby's? Dog food to Taco Bells cat food.

In what WORLD are ANY of these places selling something worth even a QUARTER of what they're charging?

[potatoesarecheese]

We need more mute characters in fiction

More mute characters in fiction that aren't infantilized or belittled or, god forbid, fixed. Characters that, instead of learning how to talk "normally" learn to stop hating themselves for being different.

Sure, we have the mute characters that physically can't speak, their throat was damaged, their vocal cords were ripped out, they're deaf. All those reasons are great.

But we need more mute characters that can speak, but actually can't in every way that matters. Characters that should be fine but they're not and they don't know what's wrong with them and they're just stuck feeling horrible all the time.

Characters that are trapped inside of their own heads, wanting to scream and speak and be heard, but also unable to because they are terrified of being perceived. because they shouldn't speak. because they won't speak.

Because they dug themselves into a hole but they have no idea what happened how to get back out of it or even call out for someone else to throw them a rope.

Because their whole society is built around this idea of perfection and how your body is supposed to work and so of course they're struggling. everyone else has baked it into their heads that they're “broken” and “useless” when they're really actually not.

Instead of getting fixed and learning to talk, they find a group of people that are normal about it. That treat them as an entire human being and help them unravel all of those ideas about the "normal" and "correct" way to do things.

We need more mute characters in fiction, because how can you ever even begin to communicate with someone if they don't know how to listen to you?

We need more mute characters in fictions, because it will help us unravel all those ideas about the "normal" and "correct" way to do things

[potatoqueenpal]

For the past 3 days, I have been wondering, pondering, debating with all my potato brain might WHY these sucker's are SO determined to prove that this child coded character is, in fact, not a child. And is okay to be shipped even though the creator said it's not okay multiple times.

And I think I have the answer, in fact, I KNOW I have the answer. Are you ready?

These fuckers are apart of an unbelievably toxic and entitled group of the asmr community that believe ANY and ALL characters that are put out on the internet are theirs to do whatever the fuck they want with, simply because they are the viewers. THEY are the audience and because they provide you the views the audience you need to get your content out there, they can do whatever they want with said content, fuck your boundaries, fuck that you told them no, fuck that you don't want this character sexualized. They want to, and so they will because to them. You are not a human being capable of thoughts, feelings, or emotions you are nothing but a sort of robot that provides them content and on return they provide views. Which is also why they throw a hissy fit and go on warrior keyboard rants because they KNOW what they're doing is shitty. They KNOW they are blatantly disrespecting you but how DARE YOU call them out on their bullshit? They're the audience, they're your fans! You're being soooo mean!

And the cycle continues over and over and over again until inevitably the creator quits, a new one starts and we start this song and dance all over again.

They don't care, they're not going to care, they're going to do what they want to do and if you call them out on their bull shit, you're the toxic one and you're the bad guy and "it's not that big a deal"

As the saying goes "hit dogs holler" if you're not a caelum shipper and you don't sexualize him. Then why are you trying to defend the people that do? Hmmm.

Hopefully this is the last time this shit will have to be brought up on this blog but I sincerely doubt it.

(P.S to the anon on the confession blog who said they shouldn't be told to kys even if you were a caelum shipper. 1:You're telling on yourself and 2: I don't believe in telling anyone to kys but if you GENUINE believe you should get no consequence or backlash for blatant disregarding a creators boundary, I ask you to put down the phone, look in a mirror and question why you think you're the special little snowflake who is the exception. Get over yourself, disrespectfully.)

Have a lovely day yall.

[gunghopotato]

So, I recently had only $2.97 in my bank account, and I needed to pay for parking, which was anywhere between 15 to 5 $. I don't like needing to ask people for things, but I was desperate, so I asked my manager if she had any cash on her.

I had this whole speech prepared about why I was broke and why I was asking her, but immediately after I asked, before I could even explain, she hands me like 8 bucks and says "Don't worry about it! That's all I've got on me, though". And Holy shit I could've cried right there, man.

Honestly that was the hottest, most attractive thing anyone has ever done for me, I don't deserve such kindness 🤧

[glitch1997]

just finished both portal 1 and 2

might doodle these two some more later

oh yeah happi thankgiv

[forevermore05]

Can I just talk about how excited I get when people send me asks? It feels so special and I cannot explain why. It's so exciting when people want to hear MY take. I have many Zutara prompts in my ask box and I am currently working on a fic. But when people send me an ask, it just makes my day. It makes me feel important, but it also helps me to think critically. I love getting asks.

As your potato lord, I demand more asks (please).

[cosmogyros]

I need a flavor intervention... there is too much spice and salt and seasoning in my life lately, my stomach is in revolt :(

[anxiouspotatorants]

Don’t mind me I’m just thinking about how Rory almost destroyed her life and definitely destroyed her sense of self trying to please everyone around her not because they explicitly demanded it of her but because she grew up with a deep rooted unadressed view of her own existence as the destruction of Lorelai and Christopher’s lives, causing her to be constantly mindful of what the world might expect of her and desperately trying to not just meet those demands but a whole lot more no matter the cost because that’s the only way to make up for the fact that she exists and is alive