#posting gives me anxiety sometimes BOO
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glitterr-ghoul · 4 months ago
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Out of curiosity.. Did you ever try the kiwi solution for the depression..? (I have crippling depression and anxiety, and it's the worst thing on God's green earth)
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I'm so sorry for the late reply! I haven't been logged into my main blog for a bit. But yes, I did try it. I'm happy you recommended it to me, I get fairly bad anxiety and paranoia so it was pretty nice not feeling like I was in fight or flight for a bit. Kiwi is definitely something I want to add to my diet. (´ω`) - (Also bonus doodle because I felt like drawing my sona)
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sleepyboywrites · 7 months ago
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Playing on my last req with strong reader, what about where reader playfully picks him up from behind? Like when you try to scare someone, but end up giving them a bunch of kisses? 🥰
I'm answering two of your asks with one post. Yes I'm still writing (mostly to ch.ai bots because my depression won and I couldn't bring myself to write anywhere) but, yeah still writing, I'm a writer by heart if you don't hear from me for a hella long time, and I haven't written elsewhere I'm probably just really sad or struggling again. Thank you for asking, low key made my anxiety force me to write again and helped my mental health in a twisted kinda way, and thanks for being patient so ta-da~ sorry if it's bad or on the shorter side I'm rusty cause I haven't written in a while.
Boo! - Masky x Strong Male reader (Part 2-ish)
It's no surprise that as Slender's one-man clean-up crew you have an, interesting, to say the least, skill set. You meet your fair share of literal creeps, and cleaning up their messes means you learned how to dispose of bodies, get human remains out of clothes, floors, and walls. How to navigate weird moving forests, and large bodies of water. You also know everyone's allergies and on occasion have to patch creeps up, so first aid basics as well.
However if you ask your murderer boyfriend, your scariest skill, and one of your favorites, is one you learned from your big, abusive, family. You were incredibly light footed and tended to move so silently you'd 'teleport'. You had, in reality, just walked to the location you were at but it scared the night owl creeps as you grab a midnight snack or glass of water, for yourself or your overworked exhausted boyfriend.
You loved to sneak up on Masky just as much as he did to sneak up on you. You fondly referred to said sneak attacks as love attacks for you had a tendency to smother him with affections post spook and sneak up.
The first time you very narrowly avoided dying at the hands of your beloved, because he's a trained killer and doesn't take kindly to being snuck up on.
You snuck up on him for the first, and almost last, time while he was doing paperwork late at night. He had been overworking himself to the bone, with stacks of paperwork and victims, both his and the others. You thought you'd be nice and bring him some tea, maybe convince him to go to bed, if you'd be so lucky. But as you got to his office seeing him so engrossed in his work you saw an opportunity to sneak up on him for once instead of the reverse and so you did. You set the tea behind you on a filing cabinet and snuck behind his chair pulling it out and spinning him towards your saying "Hey, honey!" And the bullet ricocheted in such a way that if you hadn't ducked, or Masky hadn't pushed your head down rather, it would've hit square between your eyes.
Sometimes it'll still be a close call if he's to wound up from his workload. But the successful ones sure are sweet.
You and Masky had a lazy day planned, where both of you had authorization for a day off and decided to take a walk, have a picnic and swim by one of the lakes in the forest. Masky had been waiting for you at the bottom of the stairs being familiarized with the stairs and your handy little skill you saw an opportunity that you couldn't miss. You crept down the stairs and scooped up your boyfriend, kissing his face, and throwing him over your shoulder as you began to walk out the mansion. Tim laughing and squirming the entire time. His laugh is a warm and enticing sound as he doesn't do so very often and hearing it fills you with an indescribable amount of joy. So much so you wish you could bottle the sound to immortalize its purest form.
When you put him down you kiss him properly this time, deeply and adoringly, "Boo!" You murmured against his lips before running off ahead of him and making him tackle you into the grass with similar treatment.
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stoopid-turtle · 1 year ago
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Miscellany and Such
I'm just a clown with things to say. You shouldn't believe me.
Intro post for this series
Okay, so that addresses the bulk of my need to splurge. I do want to get into some of the ancillary questions/mysteries though.
- The Timeline
Like most turtles, I have given thought to the question of "the timeline". This question is complicated because there are so many different stages a relationship can go through and they aren't always linear or one-way.
Like, when I think about when GG and DD "got together", do I mean sex? Being exclusive? Romantic commitment? An actual date? Promise of being together for the long-haul? These are all different questions and there's no real set pattern for them.
I guess I'll run through the common theories I've seen and just give an overview of my thoughts.
1. The Consensus Timelines
I feel like this is what I see pop up in fanfic a lot. Basically, DD and GG don't make a long-term commitment till after filming, sometimes way after filming. (Some fanfic opens years down the line with them only getting together in the fic) This often includes casual sex during the filming, but it doesn't have to.
I definitely feel that if DD had his druthers, he and GG would have been married one week into filming. GG's feelings are kinda the deciding factor in pacing for the relationship. Still, it is very difficult to believe that they were not physically intimate during filming.
DD was fucking bold and thirsty, and GG was clearly likewise smitten. I know what guys are like in their 20s. I know this sounds like I'm spouting stereotypes, but genuinely, all of my actual experience tells me that guys who are that outwardly flirty are not the type to faff around before diving into bed.
I doubt it was "just sex" given the romantic undertones of their flirtiness. At the same time, it might have been some feeling each other out and they may not even have decided to be exclusive at the beginning.
Even if they had decided to be exclusive, they were clearly insecure about how the other one felt about them. I think a lot about their (hilarious) English conversation about DD chatting with men and GG chatting with a girl. DD also spent a lot of time reading through GG's messages on his phone, so DD clearly felt some insecurity as to whether GG might be seeing other people.
(It's not really a great thing to anxiously read through your crush/partner/boo's phone messages like that. But DD was hella young, and I know the anxiety and insecurity of love at that age. I think the fact that they quickly built up enough trust to commit to what's essentially a long-distance relationship shows that they both matured past some of that early behavior)
(Also, I can see that if DD was GG's first male partner, DD might have felt especially insecure. Even if he wasn't GG's first, there's often times a special anxiety that non-bisexual gay folk feel when dating bisexual folk. The fear that their partner will leave them for the opposite gender is intense. Just speaking from my experience as a bisexual lady)
It's interesting to me that GG was open to letting DD read his messages. I doubt he'd do that if he were seeing anybody else, so that suggests they'd decided to be exclusive early on. That doesn't necessarily mean they're committed to the long-haul, but it's a serious step given how relationships between actors on set tend to go.
The consensus seems to be that the long-haul decision wasn't made until after GG's Japan trip. That makes sense to me, but I'm not completely attached to it. I don't think we know enough either which way to tell when the commitment happened. There is something romantic about the Japan trip story, and GG's later quote about waiting fits nicely.
I've heard various rumors that GG turned DD down the first time he confessed. This is interesting to me and especially ambiguous. I guess by "confess" we mean "confess to being in love". That confession can come with a desire to commit long-term. This makes me think of DD's Weibo post about things he decided at 21, he hopes to still feel at 81.
In my head, I have a little story that that's a response to GG having turned DD down due to the age gap (and maybe because of the possibility of character bleed muddying feelings). DD is especially sensitive about the age gap being mentioned, and we know he also had complicated feelings about LWJ.
My story continues with another attempt to make them a thing at the end of filming, prompting the Japan trip (and DD's "I miss you" hat). I also think about GG's interview response about having received a confession from someone he liked, and I wonder if he was thinking about DD. About liking DD but also not being sure they could really maintain a relationship outside the relative safety of the film set.
Basically, I have a million stories in my head about how this could have happened, and I'm not incredibly attached to any one of them.
2. DDU Variation
This Timeline isn't mutually exclusive with the consensus. The gist is that DD developed a crush on GG during GG's DDU visit about a year before filming. The rumors attached to this theory posit that DD got GG's WeChat info from DLS but then never did anything with it.
GG and DD have said in interviews that when they tried to connect on WeChat at the start of TU production, they'd found they'd already connected but had never talked to each other.
The evidence for this is heavily linked to a post DDU made in response to GG wishing them a happy birthday where they implied someone in their production was a fan of theirs. This post included a minions emoji, and DD was into minions at the time. Course, a lot of people were into minions, so this could be nothing.
If we take GG and DD at face-value, then there's 2 options:
1. DD had a crush on GG, got his WeChat info, then never did anything with it. 2. DD did not have a crush on GG but got his WeChat info some other way, then never did anything with it.
#1 is frankly hard for me to buy. It is absolutely inconceivable to me that DD would have a crush on someone, have that person's WeChat, and NOT DO ANYTHING WITH IT.
This is DD. He doesn't faff around. When he wants something, he goes for it.
#2 is plausible. I don't know the c-ent industry conventions, but I know in industries I've worked in, social media accounts are traded like business cards to network. Maybe that was commonplace at DDU with their guests, and they just added each other in one of those business card swap networking things.
But what if GG and DD are lying in interviews? They've lied before, after all. This leads to two alternate possibilities:
1a. They didn't have each other's WeChat until they started production on The Untamed. 2a. They did have each other's WeChat and they'd been chatting before The Untamed.
#1a is weird. I can't think of any reason to lie about that. But #2? Plausible. Maybe they did connect and start up a flirtation. Maybe even a relationship. Could be anywhere along the spectrum from early friendship -> light flirtation -> heavy flirtation -> online relationship -> secret in person relationship. Or maybe they just hooked up without a strong relationship attached to it.
It would add a different angle to the fact that they both tried out for The Untamed cast. They weren't necessarily going for the lead roles, as GG tried out for Xue Yang, but maybe they wanted to work on the same production together, and TU was their opportunity to do so.
This does mean they were pretending not to know each other at the script reading and the booting ceremony. This secretiveness implies that whatever relationship they might have had on WeChat already went beyond the bounds of friendship, or else why pretend not to know each other? It shouldn't be a hard thing to explain. "Oh, he guested on DDU last year, and we connected then." That's it. It's not even a suspicious explanation.
But it they'd hooked up or were even just being super flirtatious, then they wouldn't want to divulge that to those around them. (Counterpoint: They were pretty open about the relationship they did have eventually on set, even thing so far as to flirt, fight, argue, and have lewd conversations while getting their makeup touched up)
I can buy the DDU variation. The evidence is thin, and trying to "read" their behavior in the bts is always a little ambiguous and limited. But I'd say, if DD did get GG's WeChat because he had a crush, then it's highly likely they already had some relationship before filming. If DD just acquired GG's number in some routine industry business card swap, then this timeline variation is unlikely.
C. THE DEVIL'S TIMELINE
I love the name of this one. Basically, the speculation is that DD and GG might have been together even before the DDU episode. I think I've seen some Uniq fanmeet highlighted as a potential meeting point, given that GG was into K-pop at that time.
The evidence is even thinner for this than for the DDU variation. There's a picture DD drew of a person with a mole like GG's (I have no clue the context of his drawing that picture) and they have some Weibo posts that are kinda similar.
The Weibo post evidence is always confusing for me. I can see couples having some back and forth in their posts. Like, if your partner starts posting photos of ridiculous desserts, you might post similar photos. Or your crush develops an interest in foosball, so you do too. But some of the evidence is apparently photo sets that bear some resemblance to each other and I just...is this like a known thing for couples do to this? I've never come across this outside of this fandom. I don't know why you would. If my wife started subtly mirroring my photo posts, I don't think I'd even notice. (Hell, maybe she already does)
So I guess I don't find those incredibly convincing. After a point, if you look at any two people's posts long enough, you'll probably be able to find some similarities if you keep the criteria broad enough. If this is a known thing in Chinese social media for couples to do this, though, I might find that more compelling.
Other than that, the main evidence is kinda subjective in that its based on their behavior towards each other. This is real hard for me to gauge, so I'm not placing bets on it.
I don't think the Devil's Timeline is impossible. But I just don't see anything to indicate it as a thing. But who knows?
In sum, overall, I think DD and GG were physically (and romantically) intimate pretty early on in filming, earlier than many in the consensus seem to think. I'm undecided on when the big, serious commitment happened. And I'm open to the idea that they had a flirtation or an early online relationship via WeChat after that DDU episode. I'm not sold on the Devil's Timeline though.
Do I want to know? I mean, yeah? I find their whole romance interesting and compelling. It's like a romance novel, and I like romance novels. If they were non-famous and I met them at a party, I'd be totally into asking the "So how did you two meet?" question and learning that story.
But I'm just a rando in a different country who doesn't even speak their language. I don't get to know everything I want to know, much to my consternation. So I just have to shrug and move on with life (and read fanfic).
If in the unlikely event they come out with their story, though, I'd buy the shit out of that book.
- Fanfic/Shipping
I read a lot of fanfic (and have done for most of my life), but I felt some discomfort with the first bjyx fic I started reading. Not cause of the fic, itself, but because it felt weird to read fiction about real people. It's a side of fandom I'd never gotten into.
Fiction is a way to take stuff from the real world and make sense of it. This is something I've always appreciated about reading and books. Fanfic and bjyx fanfic fills the same need. I know I'll never get the full story on the truth behind bjyx but I can share ideas with others. I can engage in what-ifs and work through moments that are emotional.
I think sometimes people take a single fanfic to mean that the writer is making a Statement of how they think things are. With real people, they think the writer is seriously ascribing actions/thoughts/whatever to the celebrity.
Writers really aren't doing this, usually. Most writers have multiple fics with different situations, premises, character dynamics, universes. Writers are playing around with ideas, with dynamics they enjoy. Sometimes, they may feel they're hitting close to reality, but they know there's no way to be sure. Sometimes, they just want to write something with a silly premise to make their friends laugh.
Fanfic can be beautiful and compelling and amazing, but it's not real. It's words on a screen, and every fanfic reader moves on to the next fic with a completely different premise afterwards. It's not useful to read so much into any particular fic.
Can some fics and fans cross a line? Sure. But they're rare. And I honestly think people who write fic are less likely to be the crazy stalker fans just cause, well, they're spending their time writing, not stalking their celeb.
I do find the division of fandom into top/bottom weird and offensive. I don't have a preference on the mechanics of sex bc...whatever. But since fic writers tend to base their characterization on those mechanics, sometimes I'll be in the mood for one dynamic vs another. It's not about the sex though. There's just lots of aspects of Yizhan that I like, and I like to read a lot of different takes on them.
Again, it's fiction. Just like everything turtles believe.
- Fanservice
During my development as a turtle, I had a moment where I read a rumor that DD had played up the fanservice intentionally. It threw me back because I'd gotten pretty fond of DD and that sort of behavior was not in line with how I saw him.
I mean, I know actors are actors. They act. Part of that acting involves promos for their roles. But I've always appreciated DDs no-nonsense straightforwardness, so thinking of him playing a role in the bts was hard to stomach.
So I thought about it and did some reading around, as I do, and finally concluded that this whole "fanservice" thing wasn't very believable.
1) Fanservice doesn't look like the bts.
Honestly, there was a point while watching the bts when I felt DD was just kinda bullying GG and GG was putting up with him (I think this is a common takeaway). Even when I cottoned onto the fact that GG was just as flirtatious, I recognize that DD was just as obnoxious as shit.
He wasn't doing the actual romantic fanservice stuff that you see, say, Thai BL actors do. He was acting like a young boy with a crush. And I say this as someone who was a young girl DD's age once who had a similar (unreciprocated, in my case) crush on a coworker and who was as obnoxious as DD was. None of it resembled normal, stereotypical romance, because especially at that age, that's not how you do romance. No offense to DD. I know he hates to be recognized as young, but he was quite young and often acted like it in his clear affection for GG.
2) The experts say so.
By "the experts" I mean BL fans. I lurked around some BL spaces to see what that crowd's impression was. The overall consensus was that ggdd had great chemistry but never actually did fanservice.
True, being a Chinese show, maybe Chinese fanservice is just especially toned down. But that takes us to the next few points.
3) My understand of the release of the bts is that a lot of the bts is "unofficial" and was not planned to be released ahead of time. It was only with the popularity of the series that more came out.
Why fabricate a backstage, weirdly chaotic but low-physical affection relationship on a show that you're not even sure will get aired?
4) Fanservice ends.
Especially for a BL pairing, once the promo is over, the actors have to be separated from teh gay to make room for future het pairings. But there is every indication that GG and DD were still together after this point, and they're still dropping candies to this day.
So in sum, I know gg and dd are gay. The odds are much more likely that they are in a relationship than that they're doing long-term fanservice. They are gay. They fell in love. They're together. That's not so hard to buy.
Also, I went ahead and explained my turtledom to my wife. She easily bought that the two were together during filming. She wasn't sure about them still being together, so I explained about the necklaces. She asked me, "Could it just be fanservice even now?"
I started trying to explain my reasons I listed above and then I also mentioned they were signed with different agencies. As soon as she heard that, she said, "Ah, yeah, that wouldn't make any sense then."
Not saying that my wife knows everything, but she's really smart, y'all.
She is also a clown, though, like me. Absolutely raving mad.
One more post in this series! Some closing thoughts, and I'm also working on a little prezzie for turtles before I retreat to lurking.
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transzilla · 9 months ago
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damn your posts about tboys that shy away from the world and make themselves small/effeminate/quiet/don’t drive (LOL) hit so hard as a dude that uhh does all of those things without even connecting the dots on why i do this shit. i’ve been on and off T and now on low dose to try and be more “attractive” to my cis bi bf (i know) and i’m reevaluating. so sick of hiding in the corners of the gym away from the weight section and keeping my biceps covered and raising my voice pitch at work and shaving my facial hair away to avoid mustache comments and stressing about my chest looking less ��nice” on T but i want to show off and stop being afraid idk thank you for posting
See let me tell you about this trick I figured out, all that anxiety is something you can actually turn into a gift. Like it can paralyze you if you don't face it but if you find the strength in you to like face your fears, it's just energy. All that time you spend running away you can be using it to motivate yourself to get what you want. Which is something you're gonna have to learn how to do, because the easy thing right now is to just give up and go boo I'm just gonna go back to what I was doing since it's easier. I get so heated and complain so much about these soft boys cause I was one and it was dangerous because I frankly couldn't continue to exist like that. It was horrible.
And abt your bf... LMAO i know I complain about tboys with cis partners cause I'm like grrr that should be ME. But with all of your doubts, like... just do this for me, I just want you to be like, hey man, fucking come at me. Like why are you on a low dose to make him find you more attractive? He's bi anyway, he might not even care if you become the transmasc stud of your dreams. Don't use your gifts to limit yourself, you know what I mean? Like ohh being scared to lose him... Is that limiting the formation and specification of what you really want? relationships are so scary because it's this big black box of finding shit out not only about your partner but about yourself. Like is he really finding you more attractive or is it just you thinking he's gonna find you more attractive? Don't be scared, don't be ashamed, I'd say start fighting and get back on track on your transition and see how he reacts. Cause he might be totally supportive and impressed, or you might discover that the comfort was conditional. Either way if you learn how to turn all that anxiety into a gift you'll figure out how to turn whatever happens with that into a gift as well.
Just look at yourself in the face and don't be ashamed of what you want, man. Sometimes you gotta be that asshole. Thank you for sending this though, it really means a lot. Cus I know it's easy to see me complaining like oh what the fuck does he know, or be like yeah that could never be me anyway. I hope you find the strength to surrender completely to your ambitions :^) i bet you can be the type of guy to be a really good driver and have the raw sexual energy of backing into your parking spaces.
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sigynpenniman · 2 years ago
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You can tell it’s 1 AM and I’m sleepy because I’m posting a lot anyway let me talk about myself a bit more
I reblog (and post tbh) a LOT of anti-cringe-culture pro-shameless expression stuff and that’s literally just because like. it’s what I believe in. but I don’t actually walk the particular walk of living without shame myself as well as I pretend I do a lot of the time like I SAY that I do but the reality is I am occasionally overcome by waves of self consciousness I am *excruciatingly* aware that the way I behave here in my internet corner is likely perceived by some/many people as extremely weird sometimes when I hit publish on AO3 the demon on my shoulder is like. absolutely no one alive wants to read your self insert. when I started this post 30 seconds ago I literally had to fight the urge to add “in a mildly conceited fashion that perhaps embarrassingly assumes that anyone cares what I have to say” after it. but I somehow didn’t. because I’m grabbing that demon and beating him to death with a baseball bat. it’s like my favorite post in the world that says “am I being annoying about my interests? No, it’s my house” and that’s right babey this is my fucking house. And planting myself in that has done more for my sanity and confidence than just about anything else. you will not come into MY HOUSE and call me cringe or give me shit or what have you because it’s my house! if you dislike the decor in my house you may leave! And I mean that in the kindest and most cool and non-emotional and levelheaded way like if my weird displeases you please! don’t subject yourself to it! As for me and my house I’m gonna keep doing it because 1. It makes me feel good and this + adjacent spaces are the only places in my life where I’m allowed to be just as weird and bizzare and cringe as I god damn want and 2. If one single soul sees one single post I reblog or self insert I shamelessly post or what have you and feels the least bit better about their own weird then I will have done some kind of good in this world. please go kill the part of you that cringes and go forth into this world and be weird and strange in ways that are genuinely unappealing and unpalatable. I am kissing you on the forehead.
And remember. The greatest piece of advice I have ever read. If you want to say sorry in a moment of self consciousness where you haven’t actually objectively harmed someone else but you did something or said something that you’re scared was Too Much or perhaps made a social boo boo or are AFRAID you have made a social boo boo or what have you. and if simply resisting the urge to say something is too hard which it usually is. Instead of saying sorry. Try saying thank you. Thank you for being patient with me. Thank you for listening to me. Thank you for being understanding with me. whatever the case may be. It will change you I promise. Because it will fill the hole your anxiety is making that forces you to say something AND if you actually HAVE committed some kind of social boo boo it covers and acknowledges it in basically the exact same way as a Sorry, and if you’re with otherwise kind and loving people will have exactly the same impact, but if you, as likely is true, actually have done nothing whatsoever wrong or even slightly wrong, it’s still a kind and welcome and good thing to say and makes the people around you, and YOU, feel positive and good
plus getting all those apologies out of your vocabulary will make you feel better about yourself immediately
okay I have to work tomorrow I’m going to bed now. kisses.
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thebusytypewriter · 1 year ago
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Bit of a vent under the cut, don't mind me. It's one of Those nights and I need to get it out somewhere.
Sometimes I worry that I joined the DR fandom too late.
Like, yes, I get that V3 came out in 2017. I get that Summer Camp came out in 2021. I got into the franchise for real in 2022. Summer 2022, to be exact. You can probably find the exact day in this blog's timeline.
I joined the fandom at the time some of my now-mutuals were cranking out so many DR fics like the crazy people (/affectionate) they are, near-daily. Some of them still do write for the franchise, and I genuinely don't blame anyone for moving on.
I just... well I kinda envy what they have, what they had then. Maybe AO3 readers don't interact like they used to. I hope (ha) for comments and kudos more than anything because it shows that people like what I do.
Honestly, I wish I could do what others do and say that they write for themselves and themselves alone; posting is a bonus. I can't. Call it leftover from childhood that I'm a people-pleaser and strive for validation. It's given me fucking anxiety and depression, not living up to what I think are other people's expectations--aka what turns out to be my own.
So I end up posting here on Tumblr like I have way more followers than I do. Real talk? I have 19 followers. 8 of them beloved mutuals, all of them beloved altogether. It does still give me what I would call the exact opposite of Imposter Syndrome. Instead of feeling like I don't deserve to be where I am, I feel like I'm not good enough to be like the people I admire. I understand that I haven't been posting fics for quite as long, but with Getaway's one-year anniversary steadily approaching, it weighs on me.
And it bleeds into my personal life, too. (Or it's just there on its own, whichever.) I've never had a partner, and I've been told that it doesn't define me. I get it. I do. But as the kid who others would ask out / confess to as a joke, it never left the joke stage. The one person I had major feelings for told me directly that he'd only ever had feelings for his now-fiancee (one of my best friends) and never considered dating anyone else. It makes me doubt that I'm ever going to have that.
Anyway, something something don't be like me. Cool? Cool.
(Uh. This isn't a "boo hoo" or "pity me" or "I want attention" situation btw. Just felt like letting out some feelings for once in my fckin life. Have a good day/night, whoever is reading this far. Thanks <3)
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getoswhore · 2 years ago
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TRUST we would be fine without y’all. let’s not pretend like y’all are the only ones writing shit. again y’all are just ADULTS who sit on the internet thirsting and clenching ur coochie to minor anime characters. i’m not a kpop blog but ur weird for coming for blogs who support koop groups and stereotyping them. and i’m not an aesthetic blog but god damn do i love their pages cause they don’t talk as much as u dumb weirdos do. again. readers don’t have to do shit for u. it’s THEIR page. they don’t need reminders what to do with THEIR page. and no y’all didn’t ask kindly at all. do y’all even ask yourself WHY these pages are silent? maybe they have anxiety and don’t want to post nothing? or don’t want ppl on their page. sometimes ppl just want to scroll peacefully and silently and there’s nothing wrong with that u entitled cunts. leave readers alone and maybe they’ll leave u alone. and don’t let them moots get to ur head. i promise u they’re just a bunch of sheep who don’t have a thought for themselves. my last anon post. (ik you’ll miss me🤭😘) especially after seeing other readers on my discord agreeing with me. there’s a huge disconnect between readers and writers and it’s mostly y’all fault. next time i come back i’m coming for ur friends who think it’s okay to sexualize minor characters idc if u grew up and that’s why u age them up (mrs venus ) they’re still minors at the end of the day. y’all too damn grown to be thirsting over midoriya of all ppl. u be in college thirsting over characters in hs how does that sound??
girl gtfo cause now you are doing the most, giving 15yr mindset rn!
this just proves to me ur brain running on a half brain cell, NOT EVEN cause ur too stupid to fully read something and grasp onto it, giving vv much "im a dropout 🤡". girl, if i could explain myself a little more clearer and slower for you to understand i rlly would :(((((( gtfo and get a life too for coming to my blog about others and what they do, IM MINDING MY DAMN BUSINESS AND YOU SHOULD BE DOING THE SAME TOO BOO! treating me like i write for those said characters... smh... if you so bothered BLOCK DUMB HOE! like i said IF ALL writers disappeared not just us, you'd be pissing all over the place cause YOU yourself reads fics too, like what in the fuck is this hypocrisy??? you grown too (don't seem it the way ur scratching ur pussy so damn hard like you don't know how to clean it) over some fiction on some fake men TOO. so don't even, i write shit you fan over boo, you love me and my work, no need to lie, stay a ghost and fuck around before i come across ur blog and BLOCK U. then ur gonna make a new blog and fan, like you couldn't have before and reblogged works instead! ur treating ghost readers as if we can actually find out who they are and track them down! gtfo, it's the fucking internet and ur on tumblr, do not associate urself with the internet if you have anxiety over shit like this cause it's not for the weak. i got heavy anxiety and i deal with it cause ik y'all can't track me down, so piss off and hope off before i actually get sturdy with ur mom piss baby xoxo!
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reversetimelord · 1 year ago
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Edited out the op so people don’t go send hate or whatever but this was in the replies
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Your heart rate rises in fear because…your husband is having a hard time and needs to talk/be with you for a bit to destress? From an autistic pov I doubt he’s being intentionally clingy or whatever (yeah they say “whenever he needs something” so idk if he’s neglectful otherwise but that’s not what I’m getting and bear with me). If you don’t want a long ass conversation and/or you wanna finish watching the news before talking about stuff, mayhaps communicate that??? And regarding the book and hat thing, yeah it can be frustrating if you’re busy reading or watching something and you’re relaxed and then someone interrupts that, but if my significant other was feeling like garbage and wanted me attention for a bit to help chill out, I think that’s a little more important than being in the middle of catching a legendary or whatever. These sound like little things that are annoying to the person writing the post but mean a great deal to their partner, but they’re making it sound like such a huge deal. “At my expense”, “another side to wholesome stories” oh Boo Fucking Hoo; your partner is constantly bombarded at all angles by a confusing overwhelming world and when they see you it gives them some peace and they feel like that for once they have a place in a world that is constantly against them, but YOU have to GET UP and LOOK FOR A HAT WHEN YOU’RE COMFY ON THE SOFA, oh poor baby! To hear someone say something so beautiful like OP then someone comes in to say “yeah I’m this to someone, but did you ever think about sometimes I have to put down my book to help the person I supposedly love not fucking break down from stress in the form of listening to them play music? The ANXIETY THAT BRINGS ME, there’s ANOTHER SIDE to these stories. And yeah imma say I’m also neurodivergent without mentioning in any way how it affects me but I’m gonna tell the whole internet how my partner experiences his own neurodivergency (whilst infantilising him despite saying I’m not doing that). POOR ME!”
They tagged it with autism and neurodivergence as well, which also just seems really fucking off to me; like do you want autistic people to go into community tags and read about how they’re probably a burden to their significant others???
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the-duckless-pond · 3 months ago
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I did it. Barely. A whisper. A memory of something I once had.
It wasn’t enough to help, but I got anxious about doing anything that would. It’s been so long all I can remember is the basic motion.
Triggering thoughts under the cut.
I did bleed a little. Tiny red droplets but not a lot. The smallest barely there amount.
It wasn’t enough. Maybe if I keep doing it it will become enough again. I’m undecided on if I will keep doing it, but it feels like something I would do. I would want to have all the necessary medical supplies on hand. I don’t have those right now.
It wasn’t enough.
It’s not worth texting Charlie about.
She wouldn’t respond and what would I even say? Hey I hurt myself and it did nothing but I’m probably going to keep doing it at least until things improve? Because no one talks to me anymore and I am all alone and I can’t handle being alone so I self destroy? Yeah right.
Callie just snuck up on me to lick my sweater and it startled me and I almost lashed out because I miss Charlie so much it makes me cry often and Callie is so lovely she doesn’t deserve to be lashed out at. She just wants to lick her favorite sweater. Maybe I’ll take it off and leave it on the bed for her so she can snuggle with it.
Ugh. Here come the tears. Go away tears. No one wants you here. It’s because I haven’t taken my antipsychotic yet which usually numbs my emotions. But it also makes me tired. And I have to stay up to give Boo her medicine. So… I guess I’m just not taking it.
I could take a half dose. But that won’t get rid of my emotions all the way like I want right now. But I probably should.
These diary entries are all things I would normally text my BFF but she doesn’t respond to me anymore so instead I put them here where they will be equally unread and unimportant. It makes me feel better than blowing up her phone. I doubt she wants to hear from me anyway.
I don’t think she loves me anymore these days. It doesn’t feel like it. Now that’s something to cut about. But instead I will take my half dose of my AP and hope it numbs some of these feelings so that I can go back to cuddling with my cat.
Just got to the living room after taking the half dose. She is curled up on the couch and it looks like she has been waiting for me. Sorry to keep you waiting my little duckling. We had been watching a show together but I’m not sure how to pass the time now. Maybe a different show? I don’t know. Maybe reading? I don’t think I’d be able to focus on a book.
I could draw I guess but the vibes aren’t right in my apartment for that just yet. I need my end table and my tv stand set up. So that I can put my wax melter out. That would give me the right vibes. So probably sometime next week. That’s the same thing I’m running in to with writing. Well, that and the anxiety attacks when I try to do anything. It’s been rough.
Ugh, that’s right. I have phone calls to make tomorrow. I planned those before I realized I’d be up so late. I doubt I’ll want to make them, which means they will just get pushed off until the next week. But I guess that’s okay. I don’t have class on Tuesday and can make them then.
This post got longer than intended. I meant for it to end a while ago but then I got lonely and didn’t want to stop talking yet. I still don’t. Also I don’t know what to do when I hit post. Like how am I supposed to pass all these hours? If I had a tv and an antenna I’d watch infomercials and have fun doing that. But I don’t so I can’t.
Man, my life really sucks recently. I love Miss Boo more than living and she is going to die. Someday. Maybe soon. I hate that. I’ve tried talking about it with all my friends and I just get ignored. Why do they keep ignoring me? Why am I not good enough for them anymore? What did I do wrong? I can’t figure it out. I’ve been trying. I really have been. But I can’t think of anything I did wrong that would cause this. So the only conclusion I can come to is that they don’t care about me anymore.
And the worst part is I am going to keep texting them because I am sad and lonely and don’t know how to make new friends so this is what I get for the rest of my life.
I want to hurt myself again. Better this time. But I’m afraid to without having medical supplies on hand. So I have to wait. But thinking about all that friend stuff really makes me want to do it. So I guess I should either change topics or end here and search for a coping skill to use.
I guess it doesn’t really matter. I’ll try to distract myself.
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unhingedhearties · 11 months ago
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New Year, New You (Same As The Old You) Part 1
Wow… TeamE83Liz really went on a posting spree on New Year’s Eve/Day. Pray for the family members that have to put up with her. That can’t be easy.
First a “poem” she wrote. I guess technically it’s a poem. There are words and some of them do rhyme.
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Imagine “having knots in your stomach” and making yourself sick for days because a woman you don’t know and have never spoken to… is in a relationship. Imagine having no problems or hardships in your life so you find the time and energy to physically destroy your own health obsessing over the life choices of a woman that, in all likelihood, does not share your values.  How Erin lives her life has zero effect on your life. Those “knots in your stomach” are 100% a YOU problem. “How bad she can be! Alcohol, “sleeps w/someone” & more!”
Remember when Erin did that sponsored Instagram post where she had half an inch of white wine in a glass in front of a fire and some books? Some people, including Liz here, lost their minds at the idea of Erin drinking a-a-a-ALCOHOL! You know, that substance that’s used during mass in Catholicism and is an important part of cultures like France.
Oh, who am I kidding. There’s a 1000% percent chance that Liz is one of those Christians that thinks Catholics are evil. Still, it always surprises me to see Americans lose their mind at the “dangers” of alcohol but don’t think twice about shoving processed foods and corn syrup down their gullet. 
“Finding that stuff out, Made me kick, scream, and shout!”
I can’t help but notice that it doesn’t say “makes me want to”, meaning this middle-aged woman did actually ��kick, scream and shout”.
There’s no shame in putting a family member in a group home, by the way. Sometimes it’s the best way to get them help.
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More of this weird, convoluted “Me Me Me Me, how dare people say mean things about a TV character, that’s so rude, but I can say horrible things about the actress playing her, I have the right and free speech to say whatever I want, but if people call me out they’re rude and abusive bullies, why won’t anyone think of Me Me Me Me”.
“She’s SO hot, but he’s SO ugly!!”
Liz, post a photo of yourself. I’m serious. You keep dehumanizing this poor man and saying he’s ugly. Show the world what you look like.
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"Living with" a girl/boy friend, Is a good way to go to H_ll in the end!"
Oh, you mean like what Lucas’s actor Chris McNally is doing? 
"Sleeping with someone before "I do", Is a 1-way ticket to H_ll too!"
Again, like what the actor who played Lucas, the other half of “Lucabeth” is doing? He even has a baby with his girlfriend. Wow, funny how TeamE83Liz is silent on that. Almost like it’s a double standard when men do it.
(And to make it clear, I do not think Chris or his girlfriend are “evil”. I don’t care about anyone’s marital status or if they have a child out of wedlock. I think people who harass and bully others for their relationship are evil).
"Short hair, dog=her kid, just to name a few."
Hoooooooly crap! I had suspected this thing about Erin’s hair, but TeamE83Liz never said it outright, so I gave her the benefit of the doubt (I won’t be doing that in the future). No screenshots of it because they seemed like innocuous comments at the time, but Liz has made several comments in the past regarding Erin’s hair and how she prefers it longer than the short style Erin usually has when not filming When Calls The Heart. Her hair on that show is clearly fake since it couldn’t possibly grow that fast when she starts filming. I thought it was just a preference TeamE83Liz had, but she apparently is deeply offended that Erin keeps her hair short in her real life. 
And we’ve already seen Liz freak out anytime Erin posts photos of her little dog. Love and respect for the life of animals is apparently something else that gives Liz anxiety attacks.
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“Erin is toooooooooooo private, but also I learned so much about her private life it makes me cry boo hoo feel bad for me :( 
If only there was some way I could stop being upset at what I see on the internet. Oh well, better go make 5 more social media accounts after too many people blocked me. Gotta keep up to date on everything.”
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"I'll know if being angry at her is actually the right thing to do! Bc, we could be wrong & mad for nothing!"
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Lucabeth fans… find me a Team Nathan fan this awful.  What the hell does Liz want exactly? Erin to go live on Instagram and describe her SEX life? Is that really going to make you feel better? Will you finally be able to sleep at night thinking you’re justified in acting like a monster?
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whysojiminimnida · 3 years ago
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My Real Favorite Moment of 2021
Because let's be honest, I feel like hardly anyone saw this. Those of us who did see it didn't believe it at first. It got almost zero traction on social media. And yet it's one of those Big Gesture Loud Gay things Jungkook does sometimes and when I tell you I was living, kids, I WAS. LIVING. Don't worry, I'mma show it to you. Here's the full video from The Late Show with Stephen Colbert, dated May 25, 2021. Watch it all, it's cute and we watch original content in this household for truth and context.
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Yeah yeah fear the double bunny, Koo invented Spock's thingy, someone stole Jimin's pogo stick and Seokjin can summon talk show hosts with his magic double joints. Hobi looks very pretty. We got that part. FF to 3:57. Watch it. Watch it again. Rewind it and watch it one more time, Jungkook focus. Still no? Try this. Don't hit the play button on the .jpgs tho. I mean nothing will happen but we all do that and it always feels dumb when we do. Still shots below:
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Look at Jungkookie. See how everyone else is just buttering toast like good talk show guests? Not our Koo. This double bunny is pointing at... his heart? Himself in general? Looks like his heart, it's on the left, where his heart is. He points not at toast. There is no buttering going on here. (Or anything straight but we're getting there). So then--
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Oh, he has just given up the toast buttering song promo agenda at this point and nobody is paying attention to this like... I know I always say Koo ain't slick but I feel like this one time he kinda was. HE EVEN PAUSES FOR A FULL SECOND just to be sure we're looking because...
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He flies that pointed finger just as gaily as possible (well he couldn't very well point it straight could he) over his right shoulder. At Jimin. Who is not even seeing this are you fucking KIDDING ME? I saw this live and stopped my DVR. I really hope Jiminie caught it on the rewatch, if there was one. BECAUSE JEON JUNGKOOK JUST DID THAT. The rest of the Tannies just doing their jobs and Jungkook is out here in front of God 'n'em pointing out that Jimin has his heart on national American network fucking television AND HARDLY ANYONE SAID BOO ABOUT IT. To this day I have only seen this moment come up a handful of times and people always seem mildly confused. Maybe because it was so fast (it was). Maybe because they were blinded by OT7 beauty (they are beautiful). Maybe they just couldn't believe that Jeon Jungkook, Korea's Sassiest Gay Little Shit (I say it with love) just pulled that off. Personally? I was stunned. AM I CRAZY OVER HERE? Wait, don't answer that. Because legit I have a diagnosis or so, even though I have had a lot of therapy and I don't even take meds anymore. I could use something nice for anxiety but that's beside the point. ANYWAY OKAY FINE I AM POSSIBLY INSANE BUT. I AM NOT WRONG. So while I am very late on a couple of promised posts (I see you shoulder grip and MiniMoni and I am so sorry, my brain sucks, we're still compiling photos over here), this would not leave my brain as one of my favorite Jungkook Gives No Fucks For Your Closet moments ever. You can explain away a lot of stuff but this. This is clear, it is deliberate, it is public, and if you watch it six times and still don't see what I see then I will wear my hat proudly and call it a You Problem. Happy 2022, everyone!
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lovee-infected · 4 years ago
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Your character analysis posts are really accurate! I like how you want to show that a character is a lot more than they show. It kind of angers me that there are people who headcanon the boys as something they're not, or they saying that they're this one personality trait only. What other characters from twisted get mischaracterized, at least in ur opinion?
THANK THANKK !! XD
I really enjoy going into depths of characters' personalities because damn- there were some big brains behind their creations!
This question was rather important so I couldn't decide on any specific characters to talk about, so I decided to list all of the twst characters and how they'd often get mischaracterized.
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Mischaracterization isn't bound to twst fandom because as long as a there's a fandom, fanon interpretations of characters exist.
Almost any character in any fandom can be mischaracterized at some point, but it isn't always that noticable or important. Mischaracterization often becomes noticable when pretty different interpretations of rather 'popular' characters exist within a fandom, which causes many to argue over what the correct interpretation is.
For now, I'm dividing all of twst characters into "5 groups" to explain how each of them might often get mischaracterized.
Group A: Complex personalities
It's simple, these characters can be quite hard to understand. It's either because of having too many features at the same time, which makes them quite hard to read because we'll need to achieve a balance between all of their different personality aspects, or being quite secretive and mysterious which awfully bounds our knowledge regarding these characters and their personalities.
•Malleus Draconia: We previously talked about Malleus; the main reason of him getting mischaracterized is having plenty of spine-chilling features while having considerably childish and innocent hobbies at the same time. This opposition often makes it hard to decide on what the cannon Malleus is like, because it can hard to choose one between his darker side and softer side. What we need in order to achieve a rather cannon interpretation of Malleus, is a balance. Just as I previously said: Malleus isn't a baby, but he isn't a monster either.
•Lilia Vanrouge: Even without going into depths, you can tell that Lilia's personality is complicated as hell. Though I can't really tell that he's being Mischaracterized because the cannon Lilia himself can switch into a totally different personality in a matter of second, one moment he's a 90+ year old father trying to lead his children into he right path, one moment he's an unraveled neon teenager playing the ear-scrathing heavy metal with that guitar of his, and the other second he's an absolute monster which can creep the heck out of you with a simple "Boo". Lilia can also get plenty of different personalities through fanon interpretations:Yandere Lilia/Vampire fae/ Papa Lilia/ Daddy Vanrouge many other details which I can't go through now,but let me just say: A Lilia analysis would be rather long, and interesting one.
•Jade Leech: Speaking of reading characters, better know that this mister eel Leech is an absolutely tough one. You'll never know what he's hiding behind that friendly yet evil smile, or what intentions might be behind his extreme will to play the role of the butler and help everyone out. Understanding this Sebastian Michaelis complex is an absolute challenge and this is probably one of the things that makes him so Interesting, you always know that he's hiding something dark on the inside, yet you can't really tell what it is.
•Cater Diamond: This might be rather hard to notice, but there's a lot about Cater which is left untold. Despite his sweet and positive appearance, his personality is actually a bitter-sweet complex of too many emotions and a pretty well-written background. The amount of info found through his voice lines and personal stories is rather amazing as if you're reading a real boy's life story! But this amount of detail and considerably dark aspects of his personality can make it really hard to understand what's going on in this mysterious mind; especially because of how he seems to be hiding a second face under that friendly smile.
•Jamil Viper: Jamil can be quite hard to read. He isn't really emotional and hardly ever expresses his true feelings. Even NRC students agree that he can be quite a mystery, from his past life and daily struggles to how many of his true feelings and intentions remained a secret until chapter 4. Jamil is a complex of pain, power, hatred and patience. His background is perfect example of a villainous story and how a child can grow to be a villain, which is quite interesting! Jamil's story is worthy of a detailed analysis and some time for all of us to understand what this guy has been going through.
•Rook Hunt: We often tend to know him as Pomefiore's "dramatic stalker", and he surely is! The fanon interpretation of Rook doesn't usually go against his cannon interpretation (Expect for the times that people get salty over his appearance or attitude- Which leads to the creation of countless Rook memes-) While it's true that he's more than just a French stalker, it can be hard to talk about anything else when it comes to Rook, because the cannon Rook tends to hide a lot about himself, leaving us with a considerable lack of useful information to use. He really got us all there, huh? Even as he's a fictional character and we're living in real life- he tends to control what we know and think of him-
characters that can also belong to this group: Leona Kingscholar, Idia Shroud, Vil Schoenheit , Floyd Leech
Group B: Ignoring important features:
This group can get easily mischaracterized, mainly because each and every of them has an specific feature that really makes them stand out. (Ex: Riddle's short temper, Azul's soft and sensitive side, Sebek's obsession with Malleus,...) But paying to much attention to that one specific feature often leads to ignoring everything else about their personalities, and gives them a pretty simple and fanon interpretation which can sometimes be the total opposite of the detailed and cannon one.
•Azul Ashengrotto: Azul's fanon picture had an extreme change after chapter 3, mainly because of how his background and breakable side was revealed; the cruel and heartless mafia boss turned into the soft and emotional baby. This sudden change in perspective stole the hearts of many fans and the fandom in general came to appreciate Azul even more, but at some point it caused his most important feature to be forgotten: Azul tends to be strict about hiding that sensitive side of his, so the Azul we get to see in general is the fearful picture of the mastermind who's taken the magics of many away, not that baby Octopus who used to cry whenever other kids bullied him because he was different. Getting to know his background and true feelings made us forget about his professional and strict side which is indeed the most important side of his personality!
•Idia Shroud: Baby boy, soft child, sweet tooth cutie, pretty little emo,...and hundreds of other nicknames to appreciate Idia and his iconic nature. But in contrast to what many assume based on his appearance and social anxiety, Idia is way different from just a shy yet adorable nerd; this guy is seriously hiding some evil inside. If you go through his stories and get to the points where he's thinking with himself, you'll see how different he can be. While he can't really get to tell these properly through his main lines, you can find him secretly insulting and nagging at how annoying some people are several times. It isn't just about being shy, Idia obviously dislikes many of the people around him. Focusing on his social anxiety and awkwardness causes us to forget how different he is when he isn't forced into a face-to-face conversation, also note that there are many thoughts going through this guy's brain that you probably hadn't thought of.
•Floyd Leech: While Jade's personality is obviously a pretty complicated one, Floyd's character is even more confusing because of his playfulness and seemingly childish manners. But it's important to remember that deep inside, floyd is just as mysterious as his brother. Describing Floyd as childish and dumb is equal to falling into Yana's trap, because Floyd is designed as an extremely smart and somewhat of sadistic character. It's so important to know that he's way more than just a chaotic eel or an playful idiot, Floyd literally has anything needed to be ranked among the most dangerous characters of the game, his personality along side his magic and genius can be quite deadly.
•Sebek Zigvolt: To be honest, many of us are just doing him dirty. Look, it's true that Sebek's often caught praising and talking about Malleus but please do not forget that Sebek as well has got his very own personality! Associating Malleus with whatever he says or does (especially through fanfictions) is somehow fading his character because most of the things I get to read or hear about him involves Malleus. Come on! This is Sebek that we're talking about, not Malleus! I understand that talking about Malleus is legit something he often does but while you're writing a fanfic, please remember that Sebek has got hundreds of features and personality manners to talk about other than talking about his "Waka sama". So instead of just focusing on his Malleus appreciation habit, try to get to know his very own features and personality! In many of fanon interpretations, Sebek is bound to doing nothing but talking about Malleus and only him which is pretty unfair! We should all take some time to talk about Sebek himself, not his obsession with Lilia or Malleus.
•Riddle Rosehearts: I understand where this is coming from, but I want to see something more than an angry Riddle shouting and screaming about the importance of rules and harshly forcing others into following them whenever I read something that involves Riddle. I see how being angry and turning as red as a tomato is his rather famous feature but we shouldn't ignore everything else about hum because of it. Other than his background and mentionable talents and abilities as the greatest dorm leader Heartslabyul's history, keep this in mind that Riddle did decide to try and change his way of leadership and reduce his obsession with rules after his overblot.
Characters that can also belong to this group: Vil Schoenheit, Rook Hunt, Kalim Al Asim, Silver, Epel Felmier
Group C: Ignorance/Lack of information
The reason with this group is obvious, we need to talk about them more often! While they're all great characters with interesting designs and personalities, it's somehow rare to see anyone doing a proper analysis of their characters, either because of not going through their details or stories, or even going through them but not finding anything special.
•Ace Trappola: Both Deuce and Ace are characters who have appeared through all of the chapters so far, which means that we've had the chance to get to know them better than any other character in the game! But their fanon interpretations are pretty simple and sometimes, boring. Most of us don't even realize that we're mischaracterizing them-! I often see them being pictured as either stupid or loud and troublesome. Ace for example, got a really strong plot about how he'd go through a relationship and his past experience in the ghost marriage, which can be a strong guide to how we should picture Ace in reader inserts, but sadly we're just sticking to fanon interpretations and don't give his personality the detail and cannon depth he deserves. Let's note that he can be quite evil, smart, logical and unpredictable too at the time.
•Deuce Spade: Deuce's case is pretty similar to Ace. I'm not saying that he's a totally different one from how the fandom is characterizing him, but come on, Deuce isn't just a chicken dummy! We've learned a lot about his relationship with his mother, his past life, his relationship with his close friends, his hobbies and his will to become a great magician so there's a lot we can say about him! Instead of just sticking to his clumsiness and sometimes, stupidity it's better to consider those features and details to describe him. Not only will it make us have more of a cannon interpretation on Deuce, but it'll also inspire us to create newer and more creative content for him!
•Silver: Look, while many of us love this sleepy guy, we need to understand that he isn't just a sleeping beauty or Lilia's cute son! Let's admit something, we're facing a lack of Silver content and even as we go through most of the existing Silver fanfics and content, it either has something to do with his sleeping issues or his relationship with idia, maybe some arguments with Sebek as well but it's rare to see anyone talking about anything else than these when it comes to Silver. His relationship with Lilia and Malleus, he way he appears in others' side stories, how he handles his tasks and the way Malleus and Lilia describe him is telling us that there's a LOT about him which we often ignore!
•Trey Clover: It's true that the cannon Trey isn't that different from the fanon one, but I can tell that the fanon Trey lacks quite a few of the cannon features. We're giving him a rather solid and sometimes boring personality of Heartslabyul's calm and collected mum who treats everyone nicely regardless of how reckless or annoying or rebellious they are. But the real Trey does express annoyance and uncomfortablitiy from time to time, he can even be quite sarcastic. If you come to get a close look, you'll see that Trey isn't always as nice as he seems to be.
•Ruggie Bucchi: I genuinely adore Ruggie's personality design, especially how he mostly comes of as a mysterious troublemaker but at the same time, he's being a tiny family man on the inside. Watching how he can be quite reckless toward other students in NRC (especially the first years) and on the other hand, be a pretty caring and protective sibling who really loves and cares about his poor family and is working his hardest to support them really brings the tears of joy to my eyes. Ruggie's story has got a lot to tell and this interesting design and personality really deserves more attention and supporters!
•Jack Howl: It's true that Jack doesn't really get mischaracterized , but he deserves to be talked about more often! Most of the fandom captured his personality really good and I can feel his tsundere-ish and protective vibes through most of the fanfics that involve him. He's got a rather calm and collected nature which gives him a more balanced personality compared to the rest of the characters, and can make it easier to understand the cannon Jack. He used to get really mischaracterized back in twst's pre-release, but after the game was released and we got to know the cannon Jack, most of those misunderstandings were solved. Perhaps the only thing that I wish to mentioned more often are the adorable details and his background, especially his relationship with his family and siblings.
Characters that can also belong to his group: Silver, Deuce Spade, Ace Trappola, Rook Hunt
Group D: The healing type (Iyashikei)
Look, the cannon interpretation isn't always the happiest or the sweetest. This group usually get mischaracterized because their fanon interpretation is presenting something better, something that more fans would accept and love. 'Softening extremely dark and unapproachable personalities' or 'spreading adorable and wholesome headcanons' are two common ways of the healing type. Characters with extremely bitter personalities usually belong to this group, because their stories can be too sad for the fandom, so many decide to go for a softer yet untrue way of characterizing them, which is sometimes good but going too far with the softening process often leads to creating a character that's nothing like the original.
•Leona Kingscholar: While I was working on my Leona analysis, I came to understand why some fans prefer the fanon Leona over the cannon Leona. Cannon Leona is quite dark and unapproachable, and you'll find his background and personality in general quite painful and sometimes depressing if you try to study the cannon Leona. Within all of the twst characters, he's got the darkest design therefore it can be quite hard for fans to accept his cannon interpretation. That's why some try to give him more of an affectionate and soft nature to make his personality seem less painful to go through. This sometimes create a totally wrong interpretation that goes against everything that the cannon Leona is, but at the same time many fans agree that cannon Leona on the other hand is just too dark to accept. We can tell that this fandom's favorite Leona is a balance of cannon and fanon Leonas, something neither too dark nor to childish and wholesome.
•Ortho Shroud: There isn't much we know about Ortho and his background, and I can't say that he's being directly mischaracterized either. Sometimes all we have to use in order to capture his personality are the fan- theories, which can really complicate stuff. Best way to know him is by paying enough of attention to his voice lines and hidden details, but it can end up being quite dark if you dig too deep- His background with Idia isn't directly mentioned but there are some dark details hiding through the story that can seem quite scary when you actually think about them, therefore many of the fans decide to ignore those details, and since there isn't much of Ortho content (mostly fanfiction) either, many (including me) decided not to mention anything about those dark aspects...
•Epel Felmier: Cannon Epel is quite different from the fanon Epel. Not saying that Epel is a meanie because he surely does have pretty cute and adorable aspects but the cannon can Epel can be quite reckless, mean and rude at the time while the fanon Epel is always described as a shy, cute boy(which is exactly what the cannon Epel hates to be described as). Going through his ghost marriage stories and voice lines, we can realize that Epel's rather bad with romance, and for now, he doesn't really seem to be interested in any love-related issues either. Writing reader inserts especially can be really hard if you're going to stick with the cannon Epel, therefore many choose to use the fanon Epel instead, a cuter and softer Epel who's quite acceptive and approval of being in love. A considerable majority of fans prefer this soft and cuter Epel, and this is why Epel mostly gets mischaracterized in reader inserts.
Characters that can also belong to this group: Malleus Draconia, Azul Ashengrotto, Cater Diamond, Ace Trappola, Lilia Vanrouge
Group E: Mischaracterized on main
Spreading false headcanons, not paying enough of attention to official details and simplifying complicated personalities are often counted as general ways of mischaracterization. Unlike the previous groups, this group doesn't really have a proper excuse for their mischaracterization, especially as we see some fans are being attacked and offended by some who tend mischaracterize characters in this way.
•Vil Schoenheit: We previously talked about Vil and how there's a pile of wrong information about him spread all over the fandom, from the one saying that he's trans and his pronouns are she/her (Many fans were attacked and forced to use She/Her for Vil) to the ones that are picturing him as a selfish character who cares about no one but his very own beauty, and is bullying Epel just because he envies Epel for being more beautiful than him. Look, regarding his relationship with Epel I must say that he's trying is hardest to make Epel be more mindful of his appearance and manners, he cares to help each and every around him look their best and isn't just focusing on his very own beauty. I meant to add him in group B because how many consider him to be obsessed with beauty and ignore everything else about him like his remarkable skills in leadership and other abilities in general, but considering the great amount of wrong information that is being spread around the fandom and is causing misunderstandings and arguments, I thought it'd be better to put him in this group.
•Kalim al asim: One sentence, four words: He is NOT stupid! While I insist that everyone in the fandom is free to have their personal interpretation and ideas regarding the characters and their personalities, keep this is mind that it's okay as long as it doesn't offend anyone else! How does it feel when Kalim stans are just watching others making fun of their favorite and calling him useless and stupid? Even worse, how does it feel when they're being told reckless stuff like: "Hey, you know that your favorite is the dumbest character in the game?" Let me clear 3 points right here: 1)Even if one's favorite is stupid, you do not have the right to insult them because of it even if you mean it as a joke 2)Nope Kalim is not stupid, generosity and caring for everyone around him with genuine kindness makes him a good and pure person, not a stupid one. 3) People who are saying that he's stupid because of not doing that great in school are just as funny as those who told all of us that you won't be any successful if you don't get good grades in exams. Lmao, dude this is the 21st century.
Characters that can also belong to this group: Floyd Leech, Epel Felmier
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Well, I guess that's all? I couldn't talk much about any of them otherwise this would've gotten too long- So I just put a small intro of how each of the boys often gets mischaracterized instead. Okay it's awfully late lol I leave this now-
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septiembrre · 4 years ago
Note
Brio #4 a hug after not seeing someone for a long time pls
Ruby & Beth come back from a well-deserved vacation, at least 15 years overdue.
I really thought this was the easy prompt out of the bunch. I thought for sure this one would be just 500 words, a neat and contained ficlet. Oh well, it’s 3k. 
I tagged some folks at the bottom, but just because I tagged you doesn’t mean you have to read it, but there’s a note for you down there in case you get around to it. I’m being a brat and posting too much and I know everyone’s busy with their week. Also, what is this hellish October?
Also here on AO3
-----
So I Come To You, My Love
Beth is itchy, impatient ever since they boarded the plane to go home. Or maybe since they made it to the airport… or rather, since she woke up before dawn, her mind racing with anticipation of her 11 am flight.
Ruby had gotten up, wandered somnolent into the kitchen for coffee, and promptly been accosted with the sight of Beth sitting at the kitchen table of their rental with her pile of suitcases fully packed and ready to go. Ruby had rolled her eyes to high heaven and asked aloud for patience.
At this point, Beth was too twitchy to be apologetic, the airport calling to her like a beacon from afar.  
Ruby had known that it was only the beginning.
She had shaken her head as they flew along in their rideshare to the airport,  Beth silent, taciturn, and unable to make any small talk with their cheerful driver asking them indulgent questions about their trip. She had rubbed Beth’s shoulder as Beth sighed, loudly, multiple times in the line for security, in line for boarding. She had watched as Beth’s eyes had darted to the time on her cell and tracked the clocks ticking on the airport walls. 
Again, Ruby had prayed, Heavenly Father, please give me the patience and understanding to not harm Elizabeth Marks, my aforementioned best friend, on this eight-hour flight. Please bring us safely to our journey’s end. 
Eventually, they settled on the plane and Ruby… Ruby needed a break. Beth and all of her fidgeting were giving her friend nervousness by osmosis. They should have anticipated it, of course. That this is how their fabulous, three-week, best-friend vacation was doomed to end -- in an anxious fizzle.
So, Ruby went about her process. She popped her ZzzQuil and put on her Nidra eye mask (or as Annie would say, “her eye bra”). Then, she wrapped herself up the plush blanket she had purchased for maximum airplane luxury, fully reclined her first-class seat, and adamantly went to sleep. 
It’s in this purgatory that Beth finds herself waiting. 
Waiting.
And still waiting.
At first, she tries to watch a movie, and it plays as told on the screen in front of her for two hours. She barely hears a word. Then, she tries to sleep, too. 
But, no dice.
And she can’t exactly complain and blame it on the flying experience when she’s sitting in first class. The trip, an international vacation to France, had already been the fanciest thing Beth and Ruby had ever done. They had taken three weeks off from work to do it and that time was a luxury in itself. So, when Stan and Rio had combined husband-partner powers (HPP as Ruby and Beth had toasted to, giggling on the first flight across the ocean) and surprised them, upgrading their seats to first-class… It had been the cherry on top of the icing on the cake. 
But, despite all the makings for premium comfort, Beth ends up bringing her seatback upright. 
Instead, she passes the time, tapping her heel and staring off into space. 
While she knows rationally it’s not true, it feels like the longest eight hours of her life. The last half of the flight stretches out before her but this experience certainly wasn’t as long as any of her births, or as stressful as even half of the situations they had gotten themselves into while criming these past four years. 
But, Beth doesn’t ever really do well with prolonged absences from Rio. The anxiety of what it meant before -- ghosting, getting cleaved from the business -- is still something they are working to break from the patterns of their relationship, something Rio is still trying to unlearn as being his go-to answer to emotional conflict. 
But, historically it had unfolded the other way around. There had never been a precedent of Beth being the one to smoke bomb out for a few weeks...
Of course, she wasn’t smoke bombing anywhere, slipping away into the ether. This was a long-planned vacation, months in the making, decades in the dreaming. There had been careful plotting to adjust the slack in the printing schedule and there had been deliberate calendering with the children’s summer activities. And well, Rio knew where to find her -- both where her rental was in Paris and where she more permanently lived (with him). 
And it’s not like they hadn’t talked every morning and every night and sometimes in between of these past three weeks
God, she feels clingy and codependent and too much like her teenagers. Ruby had called Stan half as much. 
And she’s still itchy. 
…And kind of oily now?
She keeps scratching at a spot on one of her shoulders, at her palms, blotting at her face.
The people around her are going to think she has some sort of disease.
Except for Ruby, who knows. 
So, Beth sits there, tapping, scratching, sighing into the void of time. 
And it shouldn’t be so much of a surprise when a little more than halfway through the flight, Ruby’s hand emerges from its blanket cocoon to clamp down on Beth’s jiggling leg. Regardless, Beth all but levitates a foot into the air, gasping. 
“Chill out.” 
Beth takes a deep breath and tries her best. 
Then, she blows out a raspberry. “I can’t.” 
Ruby rips off her eye mask, sighing loudly.  “You’re such a newlywed.” 
“That’s the thing,” Beth says glumly. “We’re not even married.”
“Do you want to be?” Ruby looks over at her best friend, brow furrowed. And she wonders for the millionth time the question she won’t actually voice out loud, What did Rio’s dick do to her friend?
Beth looks back at Ruby, then her gaze shifts away, “No--” It comes out in upspeak, like a question and unsure. She swallows, and tries again, “No.” 
Ruby widens her eyes at Beth who cringes, folding into herself. Then, Beth shifts anxiously in her seat, avoiding Ruby’s gaze. “No, I don’t really… care.” Then, Beth grimaces, realizing it obviously sounds like she cares.
“Oh-kay.”
“I just--” Beth starts defensively, “Three weeks has been a long time to be away from home.” 
The trip was wonderful, a literal dream -- one they’ve dreamt of since high school. But, the three weeks have been a long time, for both of them.
Beth continues, “I’d do it again in a heartbeat but now that we’ve been, maybe two weeks next time.”
Ruby nods. “I can’t wait to see Stanley. Ugh, to hug Harry.” She hugs her own arms around herself picturing embracing her son. “Sara…” Ruby purses her lips. “Can stay at her photography camp.” 
Beth rocks in to nudge her shoulder against Ruby’s, chiding. “You missed her.” 
“Let’s just say that I’m glad I took the higher road and got her those damn macarons she wanted.” 
“I’m glad we ended up doing that, too. The kids are going to be thrilled, especially Emma.”
Ruby shakes her head fondly. “I love that child. Forever my favorite nibling.” 
“Yeah, well Sara is my favorite niece, so don’t be too hard on her.”
Ruby scoffs. “She’s your only niece.”
“And you know, she’s had weeks now to think about it. She’s probably feeling very sorry she said all those things before you left.” Beth consoles, reaching over to hold Ruby’s hand. “Knowing Stan, he’s probably worked his magic on her and you’ll go back and be a perfect family again.”
Ruby shakes her head, then turns against the seat to look at Beth, all charm, “So, who’s your favorite nephew?”
Now it’s Beth’s turn to scoff, “You know Annie would kill me if I didn’t say Ben.” 
“Well, she’s not here.” 
Beth rolls her eyes. “You know Benjamin is as perfect a child as they come. But, I never see him anymore. He’s always off with his friends and suddenly too old to hang out with his younger cousins, too cool to hang out with his favorite aunt-- and you know I’m not good with teenagers.” Beth shrugs. “And Harry’s eight and a mini version of Stan. It’s just not a fair fight.”  
 Ruby smiles, pleased, “I’m going to tell Annie.”
“You can’t tell Annie. I told you that under the assurance of secrecy.”
“Bitch, I didn’t give you no assurance.”
Beth sticks her tongue out at Ruby. Ruby scowls at her back. Then, they settle again. 
“You have plans with gang boo? Oh, excuse me-- Christopher…” Ruby trills. “--Since you’re anxious as all get out.”
Beth arches back against the seat, fidgeting again. “I’m not anxious.”
Ruby levels her with a look.
“I’m not.”  
There’s a beat where Ruby continues to stare at Beth, waiting. Beth rocks her jaw and looks away.
“Why don’t you just text him?” 
“I already did when we got on the plane.” 
“So… message him again?” 
Beth cants her head low, letting her hair fall to obscure her face. 
“He’s being… you know how he is.”
“I… do but I’m not sure I want to know what that means.” Ruby pauses, sitting with it. “Oh my god.” She clamps her hand down again, this time on Beth’s wrist. “Does he want you to take naked pictures in the bathroom?”
Beth tries to snatch her arm away, flailing in the seat.
“What if Delta sees your nudes?! Please, tell me you did not do that in that sardine box ten feet away from me, Elizabeth. Marks.” 
“I didn’t. I would never.” 
Someone a row over shushes them. 
Ruby relinquishes her grip to press at her eyebrows. “Y’all are too much.” 
Beth shrugs. “He really liked those caftans we bought at that boutique.”  
Ruby considers that, thinking about how much she underestimated Christopher Aguilar’s capacity to love her friend. Sometimes it just really is too much to think about. “You got a special night planned?” 
“No,” Beth says shortly. 
“Mm.” Ruby nods along. “You know that man’s not going to let you out of bed, right?”
Beth flushes, squirming again in her seat. And she feels awkward talking about it, but, God, she hopes so?
“When are you picking up your kids again?” 
“Tomorrow night.”
Ruby tsks and looks at Beth knowingly. 
“You really don’t want to try to get some sleep? You’re gonna need it. Hell, I’m gonna need it and here you are keeping me up.” 
Beth laughs shortly. “You’re one to talk about not getting out of bed. Stan literally wrote you an ode last week.” 
Ruby smiles, something soft, small, and happy. “He was trying to compete with Paris.” Then she says, playful. “Almost twenty-five years of marriage and I still got it.” 
Beth looks at her friend and opens her mouth looking for the words. She turns to search Ruby’s face and tries to be vulnerable.
Her voice comes out small and a little desperate, “Do you really think he missed me?”
Ruby snorts. “I’m honestly surprised he didn’t show up in Paris to crash our trip. The man’s a genie. A genie with a lot of dinero.”
And it’s flattering, the image of Rio flying across the world to find her. Of course, he had stayed right where she left him -- in Detroit, in the middle of nailing down some business with one of his bars -- while she and Ruby fulfilled the dream they had for twenty years now. 
It was... something, really something to be flush with cash, for all of the people she loved to be rolling in the riches, to have enough to afford anything she wanted. Security -- what a concept.
But, quickly enough she is so greedy. Beth is already calculating when it would be realistically feasible for her and Rio to take time off together for a trip of their own (maybe a beach this time).  
Beth lets out a long, deep sigh.
“B, that man was glued to his phone for any and every picture or text you would send him about what you were doing. He woke up at some god awful time to tell you ‘Good Morning’ and cleared his schedule every day at 5 pm to call you at the end of ours. He missed you.” 
She whispers. “I missed him, too.” 
“I know,” Ruby says dryly. Suddenly, her hand flies up to push the button for the attendant. 
Beth looks at Ruby nonplussed, as the attendant makes their way down the aisle to their seats. 
Ruby eyes Beth sternly. “We still have two hours on this airplane and we are going to make the most of it. It’s still our vacation and you need to hold your shit together.” 
Pep talk over, she smiles wide at the flight attendant and requests, “Two mimosas, please!”
----
It’s more than two mimosas. When their flight finally lands, Beth and Ruby don’t walk in the straightest line up the jet bridge. 
They pause just out of their gate, a big sense of feeling bringing both of them to a standstill. Tipsy, relieved to be off the plane, and home again, vibrant in this feeling of togetherness with each other, they embrace. 
“Thank you, friend.”
“I hate your face.”
“I hate your face.”
“God, I never want to see your face again.”
They loosen their hold, dab at their wet eyes. 
“Thank you for Paris.”
They tear up all over again. 
-----
Once they make it out of their gate, Ruby and Beth stop to use the bathroom. Beth takes the opportunity to smooth out her hair, dab some cold water at her blotchy cheeks, and reapply some deodorant. 
She thinks she’s going to jump out of her skin. 
Ruby brushes her teeth, and Beth inspired does so, too. They apply lip balm on their chapped lips. Beth pinches color into her cheeks, as Ruby laughs, “He sees you on the daily first thing in the morning. Or do you pull a Midge Maisel on him?”
Beth sticks out her tongue. 
As they get ready to move on and Ruby gets a call from Stan, who reports that they are there waiting outside of customs. 
Beth all but runs to the international baggage claim, Ruby trailing behind her, watching her best friend with great amusement and a little secondhand embarrassment but she’s excited, too. They get in line at customs, and blessedly it isn’t long and they don’t have enough to declare. Quick enough, they’re buzzing through the doors that announce no return entry. 
On the other side are escalators leading them up from the bottom-most level -- international arrivals only -- to the ground floor. Beth files in with her suitcases, behind Ruby.
And as they move further up the escalator, they can spot Stan and Rio waiting for them at the top. 
Beth turns to Ruby, “Store on Monday?”
Who nods back, “Store on Monday.”
As they get closer, Beth drinks Rio in and something unsnarls in her soul. He’s in a black t-shirt, his jeans, and a pair of his typically sharp shoes -- dressed for Detroit in June. Her eye zero in on his ink, visible on his neck, the stretch of skin exposed on his arms, his hands clenched at his sides, the scruff on his face. Video has come a long way but, she’s relieved to see him in real detail. She’s relieved that in seconds she’ll be able to touch him, relieved to see that particular warm look in his eyes, the embers in person. 
Beth can’t help it -- a smile stretches wide across her face. It really hasn’t been that long, she’s spent decades without him, but she feels giddy, goofy, effervescent. She could float right up to the top of the escalator, straight into his arms. But, gravity is real and she has to wait her turn.
Ruby walks off to greet her Stanley.
And Beth walks up to Rio. He reaches forward to pull her luggage to the side and she pauses in front of him. The magnetism of the inches between their bodies is electric, more dizzying than the champagne on the flight. He just looks so good. 
He beams back at her, smiling wide. In the periphery of her vision, she can see his hands twitching.
And-- good.
Beth thinks she could fuck him now, drag him into a bathroom somewhere, but all she wants to do is kiss him. 
So, she does. 
She steps closer, brushing her nose with his (and doesn’t that feel new? And absurdly tender?). Her lips touch his. And God, it’s soft and she’s smiling into it, and he is, too. He tastes like the mint tea he probably had after lunch. And she has the brief thought that they’re so… dumb. He’s thirty-nine this year and she’s in her mid-forties and honestly, this is ridiculous for their age. It’s only been days and they had so much phone sex. But, this real-life thing, it feels so good.
It’s overwhelming. It’s perfect. 
Rio curls his arms around her, smart hands sliding down to palm her ass as he brings her as close as possible. Her hands clutch the back of his neck, feeling the skin there, smelling the musky scent of his cologne, as they cling to each other. One of her hands wanders to trace the sharp prickliness of his buzz cut, and the other one of his twines along the nape of her neck. Heat curls deep in her core, flaring with the feel of him. 
Eventually, they part for air.  Beth nuzzles Rio’s scruff. 
Rio laughs loud, head rolling back and shoulders shaking. Gorgeous. 
“Baby,” he looks at her, biting his lip. “You taste like a bottle.”
Beth gasps, insulted. “I brushed my teeth!” 
“Okay, champ.” He kisses her again, short this time. “You gonna be able to make it home?”
Then, she kisses him again, playfully pushing her tongue in his mouth. He’s panting when they part. And she can’t help it, she’s beaming. 
“The question is, are you?”
-----
The fanfiction I read influences my writing so much. The intertextual winks that stood out to me in this one: 
@sothischickshe -- genie word choice ;-)  
@foxmagpie for the word ‘CANT’? Girl, were you the first person to wordsmith this? I think you were and it’s the perfect description for half the things Rio does with his jaw. This time I appropriated it for Beth. 
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blizzardfluffykpop · 3 years ago
Text
Senior Math
Summary: If there is one rule to high school, it’s you don’t miss PTG parties.
Do or Not Series
Slice of life and fluff
Word Count: 2,517
Kino [Hyunggu] X Reader
[Mentions: Seungkwan and Moonbin as best friends and Myungjun, Jinwoo, and Jinho as close friends]
The days grow longer, and I know summer is just around the corner. This summer is different since this is my last year in high school. It feels bittersweet to watch it all go, to start anew and leave my childhood behind. I doodle in my notebook during math class since senior math sucks. I should have taken college prep. But at least all the funny kids and my friends are in this class. That is the plus side, but when Mr. Davis yells that there are thirty problems for tonight. I want to curl up and die. Can graduation come any sooner? But at the same time, slow its roll? Like there is no happy medium, and oh god, isn’t prom coming up? I completely forgot about that function, a good thing that it’s not for another month.
I start working on them just as the bell rings, and I hear the books slam close around me. Good thing we get to come back up here for another period. Or I would have it out with Mr. Davis. Seungkwan and Moonbin meet me at my desk. “Let’s go bitches!” Seungkwan yells at least Mr. Davis is out. I don’t need detention. He might force me to stay extra days, and I am not cool with that. We laugh, link arms, and rush down to the best period of the day.
When we get our food Moonbin draws in closer to us, “Did you guys hear?” I let out a ‘hmm?’ and Seungkwan waits expectantly, “That PTG is throwing a party?” We gasp, “No way,...” There is only one group that can throw a party. And when they do, they set the whole school ablaze. “This year it’s only by invitation. Since what happened last year.” Oh yeah, a few people got a day in the cell for being drunk and or hosting a party with underage drinking. Seungkwan whispers hastily, “How did you hear?” Moonbin smirks, “Myungjun invited me, and he said I could invite you two, and that’s it.” We exchange a look, and I look down at my food. “I don’t know,...” Seungkwan nudges me, “Come on! It’s our last year! Let’s live it up!” While I’m not one for parties, I can’t say no to the two puppy dog eyes directed at me.
--
Moonbin picks up Seungkwan and me with the radio blasting, and Seungkwan goes, “What if I car surf?!” I gasp, “Well, what are you waiting for?!” He grins, and on cue, the Beach Boys come on. He climbs up through the passenger window and up to the roof. Moonbin and I laugh, and Seungkwan is screaming. Out of joy, I’m not sure, but he hops back in pretty quick. “(Y/n)! It’s your turn!” My eyes nearly pop out of my head, but I can’t help but shrug and roll the window down. I sit on the window hole and pull myself up onto the roof. When I feel the air under my arms nothing, and everything feels real at the same time. As I spin around and act like I’m riding the waves going down and low and up high. When he comes to a red light, I lay down on the roof and take in this feeling of euphoric anxiety. I’m a senior, and these are some of my last high school experiences. Soon these memories will all be distant and only exist in my dreams. I shake those thoughts off and slide back in through the open window. Moonbin goes, “Grab the wheel, Seungkwan, it’s my turn.” My eyes nearly pop out of my head, again, as Seungkwan takes over. He has a hang of it as Moonbin jumps up on top, and I can hear his laughter. He seems to be enjoying it more than us. “Do you know where PTG’s house is?” Seungkwan lets out a hum and goes, “Roughly?” Moonbin yells, “Turn right!” *let’s go surfing now everyone is learning how, come on and safari with me*. Seungkwan turns right, and we pull up to the house in a matter of moments. Moonbin flips off the car, and Seungkwan and I laugh, “You would think he’s drunk already.” I tell Seungkwan, and he laughs. We exit, link arms, and brace ourselves for a fun night.
Wooseok opens the door and invites us in, and the music is already thumping through my soul. We make our way in and find Myungjun and Jinwoo smoking and talking amongst themselves. The three of us grab a drink and join them. “I didn’t expect to see all three of you.” I roll my eyes, “Yes, Jinwoo, sometimes I like to enjoy myself.” He smirks, “I was talking about Seungkwan, but hey.” I shake my head and laugh as the five of us get up and walk around after they put out their cigarettes. We see Jinho, and he grins at us, “Ahh, my favorite five.” Seungkwan goes, “Have you seen Hyunggu?” He scrunches his nose before his eyes come alight. If there is one member to visit during a PTG party, it’s Hyunggu. Not only is he good at party games, but he’s also pretty attractive. It’s not that I have had a major crush on him since eighth grade and the whole group likes to tease me about it or anything. Ever since I let it slip in my Sophomore year, they have teased me about it.
--
Maybe it was from the times when I went over to his house to do a school project. And we stayed up the whole night talking and sharing music. I could never forget the feeling of him telling me his favorite song and turning it up on his speakers. Luckily his room was in the basement so his parents couldn’t care less if his music was loud. Or it was the way we snuck glances at each other as we texted each other in class. Or the way he carried himself, so freely yet reserved. You wouldn’t know he was loud and funny until he was around his friends. It was something I adored about him. After a while, we stopped texting each other, and things went back to how they used to be with me, watching him from afar and wondering what a relationship with him would entail. And him, looking handsome as ever, until one day we no longer shared classes. But I still catch glimpses of him in the hallways, and my heart beats a little faster each time.
--
Myungjun elbows me, and I nearly want to hurl him across the room. I wish I had detention with Mr. Davis to avoid this. No, those end by five, and this party didn’t start until seven. I follow the five of them up the stairs. When we reach his room, my jaw nearly drops to the floor. He has pink hair now,... No one should look that good in pink, but oh god, how he does. I close my jaw back up as I hear, “Now, what we’re gonna play tonight!” We all hoot and holler. There are at least twenty people in this bedroom. “Is seven minutes in heaven!” That’s when I see the post-it notes getting passed around. I shrug and write my name down at worst, I end up with someone I don’t know. Or I end up with an ex, but hopefully, I end up with one of my friends. At least I can talk to them and fake a few moans and hair ruffles to get a good laugh.
“ALRIGHT! All the names are in the bowl! Let’s see who we pull!” He pulls the names out and goes, “Myungjun! And!” We all give a drumroll, “Jinwoo!” Moonbin and I boo, “They’re already dating!” The two of them laugh, “Jealous?!” Everyone laughs as they go hand in hand into the closet. “Maybe I am,” Moonbin says, which makes Seungkwan and I laugh. “Good thing there’s a lot of closets in this house~.” Jinho tells us, and I blink at him, “You mean there is a chance that everyone is gonna go.” “Everyone who put their names in the hat.” I shrug, “Should have expected that. It’s been a while since I went to a PTG party.” Jinho smiles, “We all know who you’re hoping to be with~” I glare, “You guys are awful. We all know who you want, Jinho.” He squints, “Who?” We all let out, “Bomi.” He gasps, “Be quiet! She might hear you!” He waves his hands in front of himself. We roll our eyes, and Wooseok joins us on the bed, “Hey guys!” Seungkwan ruffles his hair, “Good evening, any luck?” He groans, “No, hopefully, my name gets pulled soon. I’m tired!” We laugh at him, and Hyunggu pulls out the next name, “Moonbin and Seungkwan!” I whine, and they shrug, they follow each other into a closet, and I lay back on the bed, “Well, now it’s just us three.” Jinho’s name gets called with Bomi’s immediately, “Just you two, actually!” He says with a skip in his step, "Lucky!" Both Wooseok and I whine.
When Moonbin and Seungkwan return they are shocked to see me still lying there, all by myself. Seeing as Wooseok got paired up with a name I didn’t quite catch. “What did you guys do?” I ask teasingly, “To be honest, we were playing, 'would you rather.'” I shake my head, “Yep, that’s my best friends. They have the opportunity to leave something in a closet behind, and they play ‘would you rather’.” They laugh, and Seungkwan goes, “Yeah, no, I’d much rather kiss a frog.” Moonbin ‘ribbits’ in return, and I laugh. Seungkwan rolls his eyes, “So how many people are left?” I shrug, “Like ten?” Bomi and Jinho never returned, and we can only assume what they are doing right now.
“And last but not least, is (Y/n) and I!” I gasp, “You heard that too?” They both smirk and nod. I get up my nerves shaking me to the core. And there is Hyunggu not too much further in front of me. He grabs my hand and leads me to the farthest door. When he shuts the door, he goes, “You know I always thought you were super attractive.” My chin drops to the floor for the second time tonight. “I always thought the same about you,...” The light that seeps in from under the door barely illuminates our shoes. But it’s not like I needed more detail. I already memorized his outfit, and god, he looks way too good in soft cardigans. I take a step closer and reach my hands up to his face, I cup his cheeks, and he grabs my arms and pulls me up against him. And like in my dreams, we’re making out. His lips are so soft against mine. My hands leave his cheeks, and I snake my hands underneath his cardigan and pull him closer. His hands find their way into my hair and play with it. I let out a little moan, and I feel him smirk against my mouth. I smirk back and push him back against the wall and bring my hands up to his shoulders. Holding him against me, and when the door to the closet opens, it feels like it’s too soon. No, this is just like my dreams. I wake up before we end up together. Because I know when I walk out of this closet, kissing Hyunggu will be no more than a figment of my imagination. Although it’s the best damn makeout session, I have ever had. I hear the gasps, “I told you he liked (Y/n)!” Seungkwan says and hits Moonbin upside the head. Did they bet on this? I wouldn't put it past them. We slowly untangle ourselves from each other. He smiles at me, and we walk out of the closet.
I hear moans from the farthest room on the left, and I realize that we assumed correctly about Bomi and Jinho. Good for them, I think to myself as I part from Hyunggu. What does this mean? Are we going to pursue something, or are we just going to let this memory fade to dust? I find myself laying my head against Seungkwan’s shoulder and sipping from a new solo cup. “Do you think he meant anything about that? Or was it just the heat of the moment?” Moonbin rubs my shoulder, “The only way to know is to ask.” I groan, “That’s not the answer I’m looking for.” Seungkwan groans, “It’s the only one we can provide.” I groan, “I know!”
--
That Monday, he comes strutting into Mr. Davis’ fifth-period class. I feel Moonbin kick me under the table, and I look up to yell at him. When I catch Hyunggu’s eyes and he waves, and I wave back. Ugh, this is suffering, but I’m happy about it. How does that make any sense? Mr. Davis dismisses him and tells him he’ll have the grades in by Wednesday. The pink blur makes my heart swoon as he walks out with a pip in his step. I need to do something about these feelings, does he like me or not? I need a daisy,… Which leads to me cutting out a daisy instead of doing homework and ripping off the paper petals. I end up on ‘he loves me’, and I take that as a sign of hope. When the bell rings, I link my arms with my two friends, and we head to lunch.
We sit at our table idly chatting about prom and the end of the school year. When I catch sight of the pink blur, yet this time, he’s standing across from where I’m sitting. I raise my eyebrows, and he smiles, “Hey,... Can I talk to you about the other day?” I shrug, and Seungkwan pats my thigh and wishes me luck. I follow him outside of the cafeteria, and he smiles. “I,... uh,... like you.” I gulp and rub the back of my neck nervously before I confess, “I like you too, Hyunggu.” His eyes light up, and he asks, “Would you want to go out with me?” I grin and nod, “Tomorrow at 7?” I nod again with a bigger smile on my face, and he walks me back over to my lunch table. When he leaves, the two of them look at me expectantly, and I tell them everything.
The date went fantastic we went to a café together before we went to a house show. We jumped around to the music and laughed between sets. And a week later, I asked him to prom. He was blushing like a bright red cherry, and my face was just as red as he agreed. During the first slow dance of the night, I asked him to be mine. Who would have known that Hyunggu liked me back and that we would end up dancing the night away in each other’s arms? Not me, but I'm so glad we're together now.
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veryvincible · 4 years ago
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Do you think you could share some of your Tony Ty youth/relationship days hcs? hehe
Yours truly,
Tys obsessed fan
Oh boy! I have been sitting on this for a few days now, because there is, uh, a lot. Also, I adore you, and I love every Ty ask I receive.
I think this post would end up far too long if I responded the way I desire to in my heart, so I’ll keep it relatively simple (edit: it did not stay relatively simple, and also it branched out slightly into other topics. This is so very long. Be warned.)
Content warnings here for psychological/emotional abuse/domestic abuse/child abuse!
I like to think they didn’t really have a “let’s get together!” moment. I think they ended up becoming close, they were casual with each other, and it just kind of... became what it became. I think they probably ended up using labels at some point, but I don’t think there was ever an official, “Would you like to go out on a date with me?” or “Would you want to be, like, boyfriends?” moment. 
I think Tony was a generally isolated kid (obviously, he gained acquaintances like Bruce and potentially Reed as he grew older, but you know) and Ty was... probably also a generally isolated kid. Ty may have had a few other “friends” around, given what we know about him; he’s certainly charismatic. I don’t think Ty would have really developed close friendships with many people, though, given that his personality seems more rotten the closer you get to him.
We don’t see a lot of their childhood together at all, so this is almost entirely shit I’ve come up with for the sake of fic writing and general note-taking for the sake of coherency with how I write Ty, but.
One thing I tend to lean toward is the idea that Ty had kind of an awful home life. This isn’t really an, “Aw, boo, so sad, what a tragic man,” sort of thing so much as it is that... I think Ty and Tony are at their most interesting when they’re contrasting forces, and the idea of Tony (a victim of abuse who broke the cycle) becoming friends with Ty (a victim of abuse who perpetuates the cycle) at a young age, not in spite of their differences but because of them, is something I really like to think about.
We don’t actually get much of Ty’s parents in canon-- they’re kind of implied to be, like, Fine Parents. They’re contrasted with Howard Stark, who pulls the shark-eat-shark business motherfucker thing and basically causes Mr. Stone’s business to, like. Drown, or whatever. You know. The contrast there is implied, and I respect that for what it is. That being said, that’s not what interesting for me to write, and as such, I’ve chosen to tweak these little details for the sake of my more personalized (and slightly more self-indulgent) fic writing experience.
I think there’s a lot of potential in considering the differences between how they act at home as opposed to how they act with each other, too. I think Home Tony is generally apprehensive and subdued, but more uncertain and anxious than outright fearful 24/7. In IM Vol. 1, Howard was shown to be unpredictable; we got to see a lot of bad, but there were also sparkling moments wherein they seemed to be bonding as a father-son duo, and Tony would actually get to work with his father and learn from his father. I think that very well could have exacerbated the anxiety he felt, because he’s not being taught to never touch anything ever-- he’s being taught that there are very specific circumstances under which he’s able to explore as he’d like to, and those circumstances are 1) virtually impossible to accurately predict and 2) subject to change at the drop of a hat. So, Tony has been shown to be at least a little bit capable of testing the waters with what he’s allowed to do in the house and what he’s not allowed to do. That doesn’t make it any less anxiety-inducing, it just makes him a tiny, tiny bit of a more active child than one who’s constantly paralyzed.
Home Ty, to me, would be the opposite-- he is fearful 24/7, and as such, his behavior as a child is kind of... flawless, at least in the eyes of parents who think that children should be seen, not heard (and sometimes not even seen). I think both of his parents were abusive-- his father more so than his mother, but certainly both of them, if only because I think it would be yet another nice contrast between him and Tony, whose mother wasn’t perfect but certainly tried harder and felt more for Tony than Howard did. I like to think Ty was kept on a very short leash at home; boundaries were predictable, there were no “glimmering moments” he could grasp onto in order to make him feel like there was ever a chance of having normal family dynamics, and he was too afraid to really... do anything about it.
In contrast, I think Boarding School Ty was probably a lot pushier, a lot more risk-taking, and generally just... took up more space. I think he was still pretty fearful of authority and nervous about punishment, but he was well aware of the fact that this was distinctly different from being at home and that most people at school didn’t give a flying fuck about him. It likely could have been both liberating and anxiety inducing for someone so used to being around people who found it important to control him. I think he was probably pretty manipulative at this point, but I don’t think it was at the point where you would point to him and go, “Oh, what a fucked up, toxic person!”, especially since he was, like... a little fucking dude. Like, a fucking young’un. But I think the seeds were sort of planted here, and given that he had no healthy relationships to model himself after, he worked off of the assumption that in order to have control as opposed to being controlled, he needed to 1) possess things, 2) protect them aggressively, and 3) make sure his authority wasn’t threatened.
Boarding School Tony (from what little we’ve seen of him, though we can imagine he was probably similar to pre-boarding school Tony for a while, just with more Issues now) was probably the opposite-- less willing to take up space and less willing to take risks. It’s not unimaginable to assume that he might have thought his (extremely) mild exploratory tendencies might have had something to do with the abandonment, and he very well could have adjusted accordingly; if him causing trouble for people was what pushed his parents to leave him, he would very simply not cause trouble. A lot of this is nabbed from Adult Tony tendencies, wherein pretty much everyone else is prioritized over himself and he’s practically incapable of finding himself worthy of anything at all.
It’s the classic “extrovert friend-adopts an introvert” trope, except... it’s a severely damaged child feeling gutsy enough to finally, finally take up space and find something to possess and control for his own for once... friend-adopting a severely damaged child who very likely feels like the best way to proceed in relationships is to very clearly identify boundaries, figure out what it is the other person wants from him, and try to adhere to those desires as much as he’s able.
Of course, canon portrays the relationship as a “friendly rivalry” that Ty takes much more seriously than Tony does. From what we’ve seen of Tony, though, Tony doesn’t actually want to be better than anyone. In fact, he tries his best to make it seem like the opposite. He treats everyone like they’re on the same level, he tries to simplify the concepts he’s explaining so no one feels inferior to him, and, generally, he just... isn’t much of a braggart. That isn’t to say competitive/proud people can’t be kind and gentle and want to level the playing field often, but in Tony’s case, it seems that competition is best for two things: 1) having two intelligent, capable people trying to outdo each other and, in the process, creating better and better technology for the betterment of society at large, and 2) lighthearted fun.
For Ty, it very clearly wasn’t just lighthearted fun, and I think most of their childhood rivalry would have become formulaic at a point: Tony would put a good amount of effort into their competitions, but if it seemed that Ty was lagging behind too much, Tony would simply back off and let things even out. I don’t think Ty was predictably a sore loser; in fact, I think he was unpredictable, and I think a part of Tony that had only known life to be unpredictable found some level of sick comfort in that.
For Tiberius Stone specifically, I tend to read more into the unintended consequences/implications of his character based on one-off lines that... weren’t really intended to say much. The story canon gives us isn’t incohesive, exactly! It’s a pretty good story, especially if you’re not hellbent on analyzing character motivations. There’s just a lot about Ty that doesn’t seem very stable. Obviously, he’s not a stable person, given that he, uh, freaked the fuck out and tried to take over the world. But when I say Ty doesn’t seem very stable, I mean his character doesn’t seem the most stable at a second glance; we’re given conflicting accounts about his motivations, his intentions, his past, and even what he’s trying to do in the moment. And some of these inconsistences can be found in dialogue from Ty’s own mouth.
Now, if you read into it from a point of view that’s canon-adjacent as opposed to canon-compliant (i.e., assuming there’s much more of a story there than canon offers, and canon’s “case closed!” for the timeline of Ty’s life isn’t actually a closed case), you can gauge not only some level of dysregulation, but also... a level of delusion, almost. Ty seems disconnected from reality, but it’s not like there’s one single alternate timeline of events that’s cohesive in his head. It feels like his view of the world and, most importantly, himself (and this is excluding dialogue wherein he’s explicitly lying to Tony in order to manipulate him).
Most notably, we can kind of gauge fluctuations in his own views of his self worth. He engages in constant competition with Tony, he refuses to come back to America after leaving until he’s more successful than Tony, and pretty much everything he does is to prove he’s better than Tony. So, he thinks he’s better than Tony, right?
Well, not really. Because so much of his life was spent with the understanding that he wasn’t better than Tony. That was the whole reason he was gone for so long. He said he’d come back once he’d beat Tony, and... he still hadn’t beaten Tony. The beginning of the narrative leads you to assume that he thinks his big victory was being richer somehow, but it was all a set-up to bait Tony into Dreamvision. He comes across like he wants to kill Tony at first, and when that doesn’t work, he wants to... keep Tony. Like a pet, almost. But he also wants Tony to... kill him?
It’s a lot. It’s messy. It’s inconsistent. And that’s kind of what’s interesting about it. It (unintentionally, probably) suggests that Ty doesn’t have consistent motivations, which is something you do see often in people who are in survival mode in environments that don’t necessarily warrant it. It suggests a psychological wound that’s easy to poke at.
Essentially, Ty just comes across as very... hurt. Which, y’know, doesn’t justify shit and doesn’t make him any better of a person, but it provides the opportunity for some interesting narratives to sprout. Figuring out all the ways that Tony could unintentionally pick at this psychological wound of his and all the ways Ty could poorly respond is neat, I think, and I feel like these kinds of narratives tend to be very... raw, I guess, is the word I’m looking for. They just kind of hit hard, especially for those who have experienced similar situations.
It’s just something that’s terribly common in abusive relationships-- any implication that the traumatized abuser is doing something wrong can be a trigger for a borderline nervous breakdown, which makes communication practically impossible and, if the victim of the abuse feels obligated to stick around or take on the role of caretaker, turns the relationship into a cycle of insecurity and misery on all fronts. That’s not to say the abuser and the victim are suffering equally or are equally justified/valid, but it is a kind of relationship dynamic that can be incredibly cathartic to both write and read, and it’s also just... I don’t know. It just, as the kids say, hits different.
So, rewinding about four paragraphs there (whoops, this is getting long), I think most of my feelings about youth/relationship days Ty/Tony kind of center around this concept of two suffering people handling their trauma in totally opposite ways. I think it’s especially interesting to look at it from the point of view of them as younger adults (or teenagers, or children) who aren’t so set in their ways quite yet. You see these redemptive qualities and you see these children and these teenagers who are so, so ready to be helped and saved and cared for, but with the knowledge that they just... don’t get that. Not for a long time, at least.
It can feel fatalistic from a narrative standpoint, and... I mean, it kind of is. There are very few circumstances under which I could see Ty getting a redemption arc of any kind, and that’s kind of what makes a younger Ty so tragic. Everything he does is born of insecurity and anger, and everything Tony does is born of insecurity and love.
I think (for a short period of time, at least), they molded each other. Ty’s anger and competitiveness only solidified Tony’s inferiority complex and Tony’s inability to really, genuinely stand up against Ty in a way that would make any lasting meaningful changes only cemented the idea in Ty’s head that this was an acceptable way to be.
Now that that’s out of the way, here are some more simple and concise headcanons, because you asked for them and I’m sorry this became so terribly long and broke off in so many different directions:
- I think Tony and Ty bickered a lot as they got older. I don’t think Tony was totally incapable of standing up for himself, but I do think Tony probably had a tendency to call Ty out in the moment, and when Ty became too agitated and too unreasonable, Tony just left it alone and let it settle. 
- I think Ty can play house extremely well. He probably remembers all of Tony’s favorite foods, favorite songs, favorite fabrics, favorite... I don’t know what other favorite things you could have, but you get my point. I don’t think he always used this information, but I think it would be incredibly important for him to know how to make someone feel loved, even if he didn’t always employ these methods (and in some cases, may have actively withheld certain kindnesses as acts of pettiness). I think it was also incredibly important for him to know Tony’s dislikes, for... obvious reasons.
- As I said before, I think Ty had a tendency to become terribly dysregulated; I think he was more than capable of both premeditated manipulation and unintentional manipulation. I think he very likely could have fallen into a spiral of thoughts that could make it pretty clear just how easily his self worth and his view of Tony’s worth fluctuated. 
- Tony’s just... a stronger person than Ty. That’s a given. That’s been proven. And I think a lot of Tony’s willingness to put up with Ty would have come from this idea that he was more resilient and Ty was more fragile and volatile, so if Ty needed to take shit out on him every so often, that was fair enough.
- Another factor that may have played into Tony’s tolerance of Ty’s behavior in their youth (which, again, wasn’t nearly as awful as what Ty did as a grown ass man, given how Tony responded to Ty post-Dreamvision and how he pretty much immediately broke things off-- though, I very much enjoy the concept of Tony making some effort to make amends and Ty failing to meet him in the middle yet again) could have been the fact that it feels like Ty probably didn’t have a lot of other friends at all, especially not close friends. I think Tony would very much carry the weight of this “Maybe I’m the only person in the world who loves him” mindset. He values human life quite a bit, and I believe that even on a less intimate scale, if Tony tried to view the situation through the perspective of an outsider, he would still feel terribly, terribly saddened by the very human tragedy of being forced to take more than you can reasonably handle and becoming difficult to redeem as a result of this-- not because there’s no good left in you, but because you’re so frightened by the idea of even touching the trauma that you can’t force yourself to acknowledge you have a problem to begin with.
- I don’t think Ty feels the same comfort and warmth from physical contact that most people do, not because of anything innate (i.e. a natural preference), but because the only physical contact he received for a long, long time was, uh... Awful! That being said, I think he enjoys physical contact on the basis of being the center of attention, and he probably initiated physical contact quite a bit. I think Tony’s very big on physical contact, and Ty would very much play into Tony’s preferences here, too. Just to make himself seem like a better, more attentive boyf.
- This one is less tragic-- I think Ty and Tony get pretentious together! While I adore in-canon comparisons between Tony and the rest of high society, I also think a long-forgotten part of Tony’s character in fanon is the fact that he really does fit in with a more yacht-having crowd just as much as he fits in with your average Joes. He was raised by them and with them, after all, and his education was shaped by this. Of course he doesn’t love a lot of the culture around it, but with regards to the more harmless aspects of being a privileged kid in the environment he was in (the experiences one might have that aren’t inherently negative, that is, like having certain extracurriculars or being exposed to certain educational content), I think Ty and Tony really mesh here. Tony’s sense of humor with Ty would be totally different from his sense of humor with someone like Steve, which would also be totally different from his sense of humor with someone like Rumiko. Tony’s incredibly well-rounded, and I think he could match Ty’s Classics-loving, borderline classical theater kid tendencies very well.
- This one is 100% headcanon, based on virtually nothing other than, like, one comic panel... that isn’t even awesome evidence. It’s just a personal hc. I think Ty’s gay. Like, obviously, he’s gay for Tony, w/e. But I think Ty’s gay as in, Ty is exclusively attracted to men. The only women he ever had eyes for (or showed interest in) were the women that Tony had shown interest in/dated first, implying that there’s more of a possessive/competitive aspect than anything really... genuine. Of course, that doesn’t mean he can’t be bi, pan, or anything else (or straight, obviously, but this whole post is about him and a guy he likes to fuck, so that doesn’t really fit into the theme, here), but I prefer to write him as someone who’s only really interested in men (Tony specifically), and I prefer to write Tony as a bisexual man with a preference for women. This wasn’t really intended to be a big contrast between them; I had the headcanon for Tony already set in stone (haha), and for a long while I wrote Ty as a bi man, but recently I’ve kind of shifted things around to better accommodate my feelings about these characters.
- I love, love, love tattooed Ty. Get this man a quote in Latin on the base of his neck. Get this man some symbolic tattoos. Let this man be a poet who simultaneously wants to appear profound for appearances and wants to have these symbols on his body just because he likes them, and he likes to look at them, and they feel reflective of who he is. I have very specific Ty tattoo thoughts that I do not remember at all, but this is the gist of it.
- I think Ty handles the “normal” adventurous stuff, but he’s far more of a, uh... I don’t know, a pussy? than Tony is. Tony deals with actual threats; Ty deals with fake, stupid threats. Ty is the guy who rids the dorms of cockroaches when Tony’s too afraid to and Tony is the guy who handles home invasions.
- I think the vast majority of Ty’s abuse is emotional/psychological, not only because this is what comes most naturally to him and it’s easy for him to fall into these manipulative tendencies without necessarily thinking about it, but also because physical abuse would cross a line for him in his head that would be very difficult to ignore. I think, if you take into consideration how volatile he seems, his flip-flopping back and forth between how he feels about both himself and Tony could become more exaggerated and more severe, possibly leading to an irreversible breakdown of his psyche. I think there could very well be an, “Oh, I’ve become my father” moment if that were to happen, which is exactly why it doesn’t happen. Ty’s too wrapped up in this idea that, so long as he doesn’t cross that line, everything he does can still be justified. Which is garbage.
- Tiberius did not like Sunset Bain. Sunset Bain did not like Tiberius. 
There’s a lot more that comes to mind, but this is already upwards of 30 paragraphs, and I, uh. Do not want to make this longer than it already is! So, do with that what you will.
Again, obligatory note here that this is canon-adjacent and canon-inspired, but not an analysis of canon material in the sense that I’m attempting to pick apart what the intents of the writers were. What canon provides is much more straightforward. These are headcanons, this is for funsies, and a lot of less important background details have been tweaked for the sake of the narratives that I, as a fanfic writer, would like to write and see written.
Thank you so much for the ask! This was legitimately so nice to write. I rarely ever get to spam about this, which is very likely why there’s just so much text every time I receive an ask like this, but. Again, it was very nice and I’m very grateful for you, anon.
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metamelonisle · 4 years ago
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assorted headcanons i have (fandoms involved: Kirby, Super Mario, Sonic, Smash)
mayro hcs:
Within the three central characters of SMB, the order of weakest to strongest is: Mario -> Peach -> Bowser. Bowser is an incredibly strong beast of a king, and has the magical prowess to match. Peach is able to match Bowser in terms of magical power, as she is usually the one who undoes all of his magic at the end of the game. However, she’s still physically weaker than Bowser (it’s not because she’s weak though. It’s just that no one is as strong as Bowser). Judging from how she’s playable in some games, she is just as physically strong and agile as Mario is, which puts her dead center between Mario and Bowser. Mario is the weakest, as he has no magic of his own, and outside of external aid (Powerups, Caps, Power Stars, FLUDD, Luma, Cappy) he really only has his acrobatic skills (which admittedly, are pretty impressive) and his wits. From what I remember, Mario has never beaten Bowser in a direct straight fight. He’s always either A. aided by an external force (like powerups or friends) or uses the environment to his advantage to circumvent the power difference (like the Axe in SMB or the brick-block floor in SMB3). Peach is as strong as Mario physically and Bowser magically, but usually gets kidnapped because Bowser never plays fair (using multiple people to capture her, using sneak attacks, i mean, i’d be surprised if he didnt employ an ultimatum of “get in the koopa klown car, or i’m eating mushroom stew tonight! Gwah ha ha!”)
Dr mario is mario’s dad. he is the main protagonist of DK 81, mario bros 83 (alongside his twin brother Luigi, Sr.) and the first Dr. Mario, and the main antagonist of DK’s Circus and DK Jr.. He dated the Lady from DK 81 (no relation to pauline) but nothing came of it. his significant other/mario jr and luigi jr.’s mother is unknown, if they are even the same person. He is still practicing medicine to this day and is a vetetan in Smash, having attended every game since Melee as a fighter but Brawl and attended every game since 64 to cheer on his sons. (Don’t ask me who nurse peach is idk yet also DM64 and DMW are different)
there are two Mad Pianos. One is a mechanical trap made by Boos (64) and the other one is a real piano possessed by Boos (DS).
the Unagi from 64 suffers from anxiety and is more afraid of Mario than anything else. Peach thinks very fondly of them.
Sonic sometimes asks Mario to babysit Classic Sonic (the one from Mania) and as a result they get along pretty well. CS regards mario as a kind of “cool older brother/father figure” and Mario just thinks he’s adorable. They do extreme sports together
kriby hcs:
bandana dee is nonbinary (he/them)
king dedede probably runs a memepage on facebook about how great he is (it has 3 followers)
dmk listens to linkin park and considers them to be “way better than whatever that punk listens to”
the four otherworldy kings (parallel woods, parallel kracko, parallel meta knight and parallel dedede) are still alive for some reason and HOO ARE THEY MAD (at kirby & co specifically. they’ve chilled out regarding anyone else but if they see the dream friends or that cheeky piece of gum it’s ON SIGHT)
Kracko is related to dark matter in some form. i dont know how but they are. they’re suspicious. also kracko is scared of shrek bc they saw that one tumblr post where he eats lightning then reaches into his bag for the gun that kills clouds
dark nebula has two interpretations: first is mine: an extremely overconfident and egotistical blob of dark energy that thinks he’s lucifer. he talks with a disgusting amount of prose and a fake vague european accent bc he thinks it makes him sound refined. he calls himself names like “the lord of darkness” and “the beast within us all” and stuff and tries to get people to sell their souls to him. the thing is, he’s weak. like, PATHETICALLY weak compared to most beings on popstar. he were actually locked in a box by someone in response to being given a “proposal” to be his servant and herald. (that “someone” may or may not have been Galacta Knight) the other interpretation is that they’re a chaotic and malevolent demon with a very intense friendliness with nothing behind the eye. (like bill cipher, or tom cruise.) they got locked in a box bc Zero made them and was like “you are a mistake” and locked them in a box so they wouldn’t have to deal with them. it’s unclear if they resent zero for this and may be unaware of their existence entirely. When entities are killed, they release all of their power in a big explosion. this is why enemies “pop” when they are defeated, why mid-bosses violently explode after a while, and why bosses explode multiple times and then vanish in one last big one. the more powerful the entity and the more energy they retain at the time of death, the more powerful the explosion. This is largely the reason why Void Termina was sealed in the Jamba Heart instead of being slain by the heroes of yore, as the resulting explosion might destroy the entire galaxy. It is theorized that if Galacta Knight were to take his own life, the resulting explosion would irreversibly devastate the universe. (this remains unproven, as he only dies after being extremely worn down and eventually fatally wounded by Meta Knight.) 
galacta knight is one of the heroes of yore who defeated and sealed void before the series started. people feared and demonized him because of his power, and it made him scared he might accidentally hurt innocent people as a result. he became a hermit and wondered how he could neutralize himself as a threat to the world, and ultimately decided the best choice was to seal himself away in a crystal. Whenever he is unsealed he is extremely upset (as he considers himself a living WMD who’s very presence presents an immediate danger to everyone around him), and fights whoever he believes unsealed him (as since they revived him, they must have known about him, and why else would anyone unseal the greatest warrior in the galaxy if they’re not gonna use him as a weapon/attack dog?) He eventually dies for good in ironically, his first appearance, at the very end of Meta Knightmare Ultra. When he is beaten by Meta Knight, he’s lost so much power and strength that he can finally let go, realizing that with warriors like Meta Knight around, not only is he no longer a danger, but he can rest easily knowing that the galaxy is in safe hands. Finally at peace, Galacta Knight dies, releasing an explosion on par with Nova’s. Due to the way time works, Galacta Knight is fated to survive everything that happens to him up until his very last fight with Meta Knight in Ultra. He has known that he would die in a duel to the death with a winged masked knight in the stars since the days of yore, and used to frequently exploit the law of Forgone Conclusion up until the sealing of Void. Post-Seal, he began to believe the vision he saw was symbolic rather than literal, believing that this masked knight likely represents the darkness within his heart, and that his “death” actually meant his inevitable snapping and descent into fallen heroism and wanton destruction. When he finally sees Meta Knight in Robobot, he does not actually recognize him until he’s been badly wounded, but still escapes, as they’re not in the right place yet. He is elated to realize that the vision of the future is not describing his fall, but his actual death. When MKU finally rolls around, Galacta is hopeful (which is likely why he doesn’t kill Nova like he did with SD), as he’s knows going to die, which means the universe will be safe. Knowing that this is his last dance, he pulls out all of the stops to give Meta Knight the greatest fight he can before he croaks. When the final blow is struck, he loses control of his wings and is flung around by muscle spasms, but is able to regain control long enough to relish in his defeat. Galacta Knight and Hyness are not the only currently living heroes of yore. Given that Gooey, a piece of Dark Matter who is very loving and friendly, is clearly able to not only receive love, but give it as well, I think that all Dark Matter is capable of it, except for Zero, and possibly Miracle Matter. (I’d be willing to give them a chance, though.) They are unable to tap into their positive emotions because of their loyalty to Zero. This has changed as of Kirby 64: The Crystal Shards and Kirby Star Allies. After Zero’s death in 64 and Void’s purification in Allies, all remaining Dark Matter is free to do as they please without Zero to tell them what to do. Most have disappeared, but four major members remain. Gooey, Void, Miracle Matter, and Dark Matter Swordsman. He was the first Dark Matter to realize that he cared about others when post DL3, he questioned why he was so adamant to fight Kirby and Gooey even when it could have easily resulted in his death. He ultimately came to the conclusion that it was because he genuinely cared about Zero, and his intense loyalty to him was a result of that. Until Void’s purification, DMS hung around Gooey frequently, as they’re really the only family he has left. After Void’s purification, he was elated to learn that Zero had effectively come back, but now able to give love as well as receive it. He’s a little sad Void doesn’t remember his time as Zero, and as such doesn’t remember him, but believes it’s for the best that Void is not burdened by his past mistakes. His relation to Miracle Matter is unknown.  Now that Void has been purified and DMS has embraced his positive emotions, they are no longer weak to the Love-Love stick or the Rainbow Sword. As such, the Love-Love Stick has been disassembled back into the heart stars and returned to their owners, and the Rainbow Sword is currently in the possession of DMS, having replaced his old sword. Similarly to all native Dream Landers becoming animate yarn outlines in Patch Land, all native Patch Landers become animate three-dimensional plushies in Dream Land. The bosses from Kirby’s Epic Yarn are still around. Even Yin-Yarn is still alive! (but Shhhh don’t tell anybody its a secret) They’re doing a lot better now that Yin-Yarn isn’t around/active to boss them around. Fangora- Mostly just vibes in Weird Woods. They’re a lot less hostile then they used to be, so give em’ a visit! They’d love to eat-er... Meet you! Squashini- Still performs magic. He uses a weird mix of stage magic and actual magic and occasionally performs in Dream Land. He’s especially popular on Halloween! Hot Wings- Continues to look after her chicks in Hot Land, although they’re adolescents at this point rather than babies. She’s cooled down in terms of intensity and has begun to warm up to visitors, but only really trusts Fluff and Kirby. In Dream Land, her fire is cloth, but still burns like real fire. She has occasionally been known to barbecue as of late, complete with a cheesy apron and cheesier jokes. This has made her popular in Patch Land but she mostly just cooks for friends or her kids. Most of the time they just forage. Calimari- Resents Double Bubble and the Fuzz for ruining his cap, and has made himself a new one. He continues to hoard treasure, and will pickpocket anyone who comes by him. He could theoretically make a fortune with his knitting skills, but is too lazy to do so. A really good way to piss him off is to tell him he looks like a potato. He will hurt you. Meta Knight and Dedede - Oh You Know Fluff once ate an entire bar of ZOTE he found in Kirby’s laundry room and no one noticed until it was too late
idk there’ll probably be more but i’m kinda tired rn. feel free to add or edit as you please. i’m bad at being consistent i think so help is greatly appreciated 
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