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ct-multifandom · 1 month ago

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S6 ep speculation

Get ready to hear my 80% wrong predictions even though I’m like, super not caught up on this show! It’s still fun to guess. Also this post will be generally leak-free so don’t go replying to it with “uhhh actually from the leaks we know this and that”. Not the place. Warning, this post is incredibly long.

1) Climatiqueen

I lean into the microphone and say, “Aurore”. The crowd erupts into cheers and fervent applause. Everyone shouts and whistles and pumps their arms in the air.

Interesting that they went with the French name for both translations, and she clearly seems to be a powered up version of stormy weather. It’s so fitting to circle around and start this new arc and new butterfly user off with the OG… I just hope we’ll get to learn a little about her character this time (doubtful). She’s gone to the main cast’s school this whole time and was Marc and Zoe’s classmate. It’d be great if they made her an actual recurring character instead of a special NPC. The children yearn for a character who acts like a cunty Mean Girl but isn’t actually a bad person.

I’m guessing this episode will serve as a general intro to the new world, showing us a typical day in the life of LB & CN kind of like the original pilot without dropping any important main plot developments.

2) Dessinatriste/The Illustrhater

Why is nobody talking about how funny the English name is, that’s hilarious. The haterrr. I’m getting very different vibes from both translations emotions-wise. The English title makes it sound like they’re petty or angry rather than sad.

My first thought was Nath because the name follows similar conventions as Dessinateur/Evillustrator in both languages and as one of the earliest and most iconic akumas it might continue this idea of Lila following in Gabriel’s footsteps while first learning how to butterfly.

In early s1, Gabriel was still experimenting with his powers while figuring out what does and doesn’t work when making an akuma. Well actually, since it was Gabriel, he learned absolutely nothing and was shocked when making the same mistakes over and over didn’t give him different results.

I think putting Lila through that same test drive phase would show her being much more analytical and actually develop her skills based on what she learns. In s1, Gabriel had a hard time making The Evillustrator do what he wanted, going so far as to like bloodbend him, then never targeted him again. If Lila was in that situation, she might figure out how to be more persuasive/manipulative/motivational or just learn that she has to choose akumas who will align with her goals in the first place.

Nath is also majorly due for character development. And he might be a pro level hater. It’s odd and a shame that we’ve only seen him once while every other class character has been akumatized like a hundred times atp. I think it’s most likely him.

I’ve seen people bring up that the French name sounds like a pun on the feminine form of the word. While Nath might be a diva, my counter argument is that this might be referring to Kagami, who is also interested in illustration and a girl. <- LMAO [insert Kagaminette joke], I mean “and is a girl”.

We haven’t heard much about her artistic journey in a long time even though it was important enough to mention in that trading card game where they said she secretly wants to make her own manga but lacks the confidence to start even though she has it planned out (super paraphrased).

Since Tomoe will become a greater villain, this could be the opportunity to show it since she’s the reason Kagami is self-conscious about her art. Maybe Tomoe will provoke Kagami into getting akumatized on purpose to test out Lila’s abilities or use her somehow. I’m not sure what her motivations are. Kagami does have, what, four different akuma forms already not counting powered-up ones? Crazy evolution tree, why not add more.

This might be an episode where Kagami becomes more comfortable pursuing what she wants and finding support among Marinette and friends instead of looking for Tomoe’s validation, continuing the plot line from Perfection. Once again, I don’t think it’s likely to be her tho.

3) Sublimation

I’ve seen the leaks and I believe everything I’ve seen has been from this episode. I feel comfortable saying this since it was already released in the official trailer, but the villain here is the coach woman. This episode seems to mostly be focused on this new runner girl character. I won’t elaborate because I don’t think any of the other stuff I know about this ep was in official material, but yeah, very much a new character situation.

You’d think this episode would have something to do with the power of the rooster miraculous, but there is absolutely no indication of that. I like to imagine the writers have a “word of the day” calendar at the office, and when they learned the word sublimation they were like, “hollllyyyy shit you guys, we need more people to know about this”.

4) Daddycop

I expect this to be a Sabrina-centric development episode and would be shocked if it’s not. Her relationship with Roger is pretty interesting since they seem to be on good, loving terms, yet he’s okay with all the Chloe bs and seems apathetic or ignorant to how Sabrina was being treated. Maybe we’ll see some rebellion from her now that she hangs out with other people.

The akuma’s name, to me, implies that Sabrina will be responsible for Roger’s akumatization or at least the main focus of it. Maybe he will become overly protective of her and target anyone who fucks with her or worry that she’s straying from the right path and exaggeratedly try to correct her behavior.

Sabrina’s behavior up to around Penalteam was likely informed by Roger’s influence, possibly more-so than Chloe’s. He had this “doing what you’re told is right” mindset that he instilled in his daughter, so in this episode, she might help him unlearn it. As a cop, he was always mindlessly bossed around by Mayor Bourgeois, so since Andre is gone, Roger will have to think for himself more.

5) Papys Garous/Werepapas

Continuing the theme of dramatic dads, the consensus seems to be that this will be Tom and probably Rolland. I’m not sure why, but Marinette’s always getting up to some silly billy antics, so. Tom doesn’t seem to have any issue with Adrien and idk what type of beef is gonna start for the grandpa to get involved. It might be some misunderstanding situation or another “Chat Noir is on our fucking balcony again, get the broom” moment.

It might very well be the mom and dad though, not the dad and grandpa. People have been talking about how it’s unrealistic that Marinette has been able to keep huge secrets from her parents for so long, so they might snap this time, not because of Adrien, but because she’s been acting shady herself. They might assume she’s getting into trouble. People have been long speculating that Sabine will learn Ladybug’s identity soon, so maybe she will finally have to tell her parents in a situation similar to gang of secrets.

6) Princesse Syren/Sleeping Syren

Ondine yayyyy! Yay! Ondine. Possibly a Kimdine episode to redeem Kim after they ruined his character for no reason and everyone got really mad because it didn’t even make sense. Remember when the instas were still a thing Alya had a post like “hanging out at the pool! Ondine is so awesome idk what she sees in Kim” or something. Yeah. How’d he pull a baddie like her if he’s been acting the way they’ve been showing him to act? Makes no cents luv. I’m dying to see more of their relationship, more of her, and some repair of what they’ve done to Kim.

It sounds like they might be doing some kind of sleeping beauty retelling? Idk how that would make Syren a threat if she’s asleep the whole time, but maybe she’ll still be doing the whole flooding the city with tears thing while she’s sleeping.

I also really hope Ondine will be attending their school now. I want to see her interact with other characters and become more relevant. Please give The People (me) what they want (official Ondine street clothes design). Also they’ve been introducing too many lamely designed girl characters with average heights and athletic-skinny body types. We need the 6ft swole girl to balance them out.

7) El Toro de Piedra

This name is so Ivan-coded that I’m tempted to just say that it’s not him, but why would they make an intentionally misleading Ivan clone. The name is concerning because it sounds like a mix of stoneheart and his hero persona. That makes me think maybe he’ll get akumatized AS Minotaurox. His arc has been about how he’s scared to accidentally harm others because being the first akuma bothered him so deeply. If he’s in a situation where he has to act tough or use force as a hero, he might become upset, worrying that he’s going overboard. I can see him cracking if his fight against an akuma ends up getting a civilian hurt in the crossfire or with someone being scared of him afterwards. Having his regular/akuma and hero forms mix together could compromise his identity.

Also I guess he’s Hispanic? *sonic voice* I didn’t know that. I remember a long while ago they said in an interview to look forward to Ivan lore which is one of the things I am most excited for this season. He is probably THE most underrated character in the show and most overdue for development.

8) Vampigami

Guys I hate to say it. I really hate to say it. My heart wants this to be vampire Kagami sooooo bad but my brain says we aren’t allowed to have nice things. I already suggested a Kagami akuma earlier, and she can totally get akumatized several times a season again because her mom hates her, but I’m not ready to be disappointed like this. I want her to become a badass evil vampire and acquire a Ben 10 arsenal of villain forms, but Vampigami is probably gonna be some stupid shit like Optigami except it looks like a bat instead of a butterfly this time.

I really don’t know what to seriously expect. I can’t imagine vamp referring to anything other than vampire, although it can also mean patching/editing like the word revamp. Gami has only been used in a senti name before to mean oragami. Idk man vampire Kagami is so engrained in my mind that I can’t come up with anything else. Like to charge reblog to cast. Let’s manifest that the writers have finally tuned in to what the people want.

9) Monsieur/Mister Agreste

This has got to be the episode that introduces Adrien’s grandparents, right? Meaning his grandpa is gonna be Gabriel’s dad and the title could stand for three generations of Mr. Agrestes. I’m surprised we haven’t heard much about them yet, but since Gabriel’s dead, it makes sense they’d come around to get his affairs in order or attend the funeral etc etc.

We got a big movie about Emilie’s history and her noble family, but all we know about the Agrestes is that they weren’t rich, and they sold fries. But there’s the weird part: wouldn’t Gabriel’s parents be the Grassettes? How much do they know about his life after he moved out? This episode might show us more about where it all went wrong for the Gabriel of this timeline. Maybe his dad will get akumatized because Gabriel abandoned their family, and he’ll become Mr. Agreste instead of Mr. Grassette to try to fit himself back into Gabriel’s fake narrative. He’ll turn into a rich asshole old guy because he thinks that’s the type of dad Gabriel would have wanted instead of his real self. Dang that’s sad.

10) Le Chateau Noir/The Dark Castle

My first reaction was Chat Noir, but I saw someone say Darkblade which makes so much more sense. I mean Chat Noir getting akumatized is an avengers-level threat, and last time it happened he blew up like everything, plus the episode was pretty late into the season.

Darkblade fits pretty well with the castle thing since he’s a knight. He lost yet another mayoral election, unable to even blame it on corruption this time. On top of it all, the new, fairly elected mayor is his old coworker from school who also didn’t have much political experience. Ouch.

11) Revelator

I’m getting Reverser from the name but only vaguely. This sounds like a similar type of villain to Gold Record who forces people to reveal something about themselves. Maybe this episode will go into how suddenly having secret identities is affecting the other characters’ relationships like Gang of Secrets again or Truth/Lies. If the akuma’s power has to do with revealing secrets, someone may get their identity exposed on accident like in Wishmaker. By that I mean a reveal between characters other than the akuma and the secret they want to find out.

12) Psyconductrice/Wreckless Driver

My first thought here was Max’s mom because she’s a train engineer, but the name seems to imply cars specifically. Totally unrelated, but remember that one poll on here about who’s the hottest MILF in miraculous, and Claudie Kante was in dead last by a lot, even way behind Audrey with her fuckass Anna Wintour bob and horrible child abusing bitter personality? Yeah you all have horrible taste. Democracy is dead and I hope everyone is happy being so goddamn ignorant and wrong. /hj.

On the topic of moms this could still be someone’s mom. I’ve brought up the pattern before: many moms are associated with a mode of transportation that are connected to their villain form. Car: Tomoe, boat: Anarka, train: Claudie, motorcycle: Gina. We could get a bus driver mom, or a trucker or taxi or racecar driver. Imagine. I’ve been saying we need a pilot mom.

Even if this isn’t anyone’s mom, it might be a new character. Idk who else it could be of existing characters.

13) Yaksi Gozen

This bitch again. Boo. I mean she IS super badass actually, but can we comically pull her offstage with a long hooked cane and let someone else have the screentime? I gotta say I am interested in her as a major villain but. Her akuma was cool the first two times and it’s time to calm down.

Clearly there’s something new about her this time. When looking up what yaksi means, it brings up yakshi, a type of nature spirit, but nothing that actually matches with “yaksi”. Maybe she’ll run a greenwashing campaign with her company? That reminds me of Mega Leech and how she wasn’t held accountable for her involvement in that scenario. If she comes under fire, she might get herself akumatized on purpose Collector-style to save face. Does anyone know if yaksi means something else? I’m not convinced it’s supposed to be yakshi without the h.

14) Couchorak/Grendiaper

Gigantitan vibes, possibly a powered-up version of him. When Hawkmoth first akumatized the baby, it was by mistake, and he ended up regretting it because he was hard to control and useless to his cause. Would Lila akumatize a baby on purpose, or is this an accident too? Since there’s a time skip, baby August would be a year older as well, so he’d actually be a toddler now, which might make him less unpredictable.

A shot in the dark I’m gonna make is that this might be Ivan’s younger sister. We know he has one, and while we don’t know her age, it sounds like she’s probably a toddler. We also know that he’s interested in childcare as a career. If I had to guess, I’d say he probably takes care of her often, which might be what gave him the idea. If she gets akumatized, it would be a great setup for his superhero focus episode.

15) La Redresseuse/The Ruler

My hottest take on this whole post is that this one is Mendeleev. Isn’t she the principal now or something? Idk but she’s a strict teacher who needs order, so I think the name matches her because 1: rulers are school supplies, especially for a science teacher who needs everything to be measured exactly, 2: ruler meaning leader with a totalitarian connotation, 3: the French title means straightener which connects to disciplining students or controlling how the school is run.

I think she’ll get akumatized because her students lack respect for her, and her strictness makes them dislike her which actually hurts her feelings as seen in the NY special. She might have a hard time adjusting to this new school system and her new role, not seeing the same positive relationships Bustier and Damocles held with the kids. She’ll go way overboard and turn into an evil school-themed dictator to try and regain control, but then learn her own lesson.

16) Noe

This is most likely a new character or something, but I love the idea that it’s just like, evil Zoe. Zoen’t. Noe.

OR imagine if it’s a more powerful version of Nino’s brother because it’s Noel but without the L, meaning this time, he won’t be taking the L. Coincidence? I think not. He is Lila’s pawn or whatever after all.

In all seriousness I have no idea what this is and the name could mean a lot of things, so I’m gonna just go with a completely new character.

17) La Fee De Beaux Reves/A Fairy Good Night

This is so Pigella energy. Not Rose, Pigella. In Jubilation, we saw how terrifying her power is when used for evil, trapping people in their own daydreams. Maybe she’ll struggle with nightmares or sleep problems and turn into an akuma that forces everyone to get stuck in imagined utopian illusions so they can “rest”. This idea is kind of the opposite of Sandboy and Nightormentor. I’d love to see more of her power and how it can be used for both good and evil, especially since a lot of people seem to think it’s useless or too situational.

18) Les Crassetastrophes/The Dirtifiers

This might be the little kids in another obligatory babysitting episode. The villain name is plural, so it could be a comic relief moment where the kids get mad because they don’t want to clean up or something silly. Otherwise maybe this is another pollution situation? I’m leaning more towards children, though. Another possibility is that we might be getting our first animal akumas.

19) Riginarazione

So I’m pretty set on this being Lila herself. Italian words? Check. Villain name having “queen” (rigina) in it because they can’t be too creative? Check. I’m guessing the pun is supposed to be regeneration rather than “queen ration” so maybe she’s gonna make herself some sort of nearly invincible self-healing villain.

20) Renverse-cœurs/Heartfixer

This sounds like that monstrosity Andre and Audrey turned into. Heart Hunter. I had to Google the name because I erased it from my mind. Out of all the old villains, I’m surprised this is one they’d choose to revamp since it was such a jumpscare, but I can see how they’d want to revisit it in the context of the Bourgeois’s messed up relationship since they were more of a temporary joke villain the first time. Maybe we’ll get some backstory on Chloe and Zoe as kids and who this Lee guy is who’s supposed to be Zoe’s American Dad (goooood morning, USA!). Based on the akuma name… maybe they’re gonna get less divorced. Wouldn’t that be a shocker? Audrey character development? Or maybe they’ll feel the need to keep it together for the kids.

21) Les Titans Chaines/The Chained Titans

I have no idea but it sounds awesome. Clearly more than one person. My first thought was s5 finale energy with the miraculized, like a whole mob of people sharing the same negative emotions. The metal vibes make me think maybe Couffaine family just because they’re so dramatic, and Jagged was a titan in the music industry who didn’t want to feel chained down? Kind of a stretch perhaps. Of course, it could be something new.

22) Lady Chaos

I’m saying Marinette akuma idc. I know people have been making this prediction for the past couple seasons and the writers were saying no but. Episode 22 is the one where shit goes down. Now that Bunnyx is active full time and there’s an entire team of other superheroes, there’s finally a chance to beat her if she does turn evil. I’m guessing it’s gonna be a bad timeline one like the Adrien akumas.

My concern with this type of ep is that they’d Mary Sue her and be like “her power levels are so high that nobody stands a chance against her, the best ladybug ever” even with like 20 heroes fighting her. I don’t think it’d be too bad though, because thinking about Chat Blanc, if she instantly blows up the whole world and the goal is just to undo that timeline, it’d probably be about equivalent.

23) Tristanansi

Using triste in two of the French akuma names is uh�� we couldn’t come up with anything more creative? Anyway obv Nora so this could once again be a Nino episode like the first, but it could also (more likely imo) be an Alya one. Nora has a fiery personality and strong opinions so maybe Lila could’ve taken advantage of that to manipulate her kind of like what happened with Jalil. We were briefly introduced to a character who is her friend or boyfriend last season, and he may be more relevant this time, like maybe they have a fight. Similar to Sentibubbler, maybe Lila is targeting Alya’s family to try and get information out of her or steal the fox miraculous.

24) La Reine de Frayeurville/Queen of the Dreadzone

Other people have been saying this could be a Halloween special but… I want to say this might be a powered up Horrificator. This might be one of those episodes where they make it more lighthearted before the finale, and we haven’t seen her act on her own since s1 which is like the whole point of her akuma. She isn’t effective at all in groups and everyone’s been kinda desensitized to what’s supposed to be scary about her. Maybe they’re bringing her back scarier. Mylene has come far with her phobias, so they’d need something to really scare her.

I remember something about a proposed Halloween special taking place in the catacombs, which is coincidentally where Lila’s lair is. There might be a connection where the gang figures out she’s there, and something spooky goes wrong while investigating. The Paris catacombs are an understandable place to get scared in and a great setting for horror.

25) Protocole Secret/Secret Protocol

26) Nemesis

^^^ Ok I don’t know what specifically to say about the finale except that they’re probably gonna fight self-akumatized Lila since they tend to be kind of unpredictable.

What I do want to do is bring everything together and point out that Lila knows the identities of like half the heroes from the beginning because she stole Nathalie’s iPad or whatever happened. In Miracle Queen: Alya, Nino, Luka, Kagami, Kim, and Max had their identities revealed, which was relevant again in Optigami. Alix didn’t even try to keep a secret. Lila can easily connect that five of these people are her former classmates and all of them are friends, so she must have figured out that the rest of the heroes are also from their group. In the London special, it didn’t take a lot of hard work to uncover Marinette’s identity. She also targeted Kagami last season on a personal level. Side note, I have no clue if she knows Felix is Argos or not. That point is unclear to me, but I’m gonna assume she does since Gabriel knew.

We have Marinette, Adrien, Juleka, Rose, Mylene, Ivan, Zoe, Marc, Nath, and Sabrina left in the safe zone. I predicted most of these characters will get akumatized, and I believe Lila will be targeting them on an individual level under the suspicion that they’re on the team. It’s likely that she will even expose some if not a lot of them. In fact, she might have gone after Ondine as a red herring because she’s friends with them and King Monkey’s gf. From her perspective, Marinette could be one of the superheroes just as easily as anyone else could.

I’m not too worried about Adrien since he’s been the best at staying secretive, and Lila might not even suspect him because of the idealized yet untrue preconceived notions she has about him.

She may also be going down the list to see who does and doesn’t show up to each fight, making ladybug feel the need to call the minimum number of people to help her, which would solve the narrative problem of “why can’t ladybug sic the whole team on every akuma”. Discounting any Mirage tricks, having a certain hero help fight an akuma would tell Lila that the akuma is for sure not that hero. And obviously if every hero except one shows up that’s uh… suspicious.

Something very interesting is that out of all these characters, the episode I predicted to focus on Sabrina is one where the akuma is not her. Perhaps Lila will overlook her because she only recently made new friends, thinking she’d never be trusted with a miraculous. This same mistake of underestimating Sabrina is what led to her downfall the first time, so it’d be poetic if Sabrina managed to play the spy twice.

I did not predict any of these episodes to potentially be a Juleka akuma, but you know this girl will never in her life catch a break, especially with the rest of the pattern I’ve laid out above. Which episode do you think is secretly gonna be Reflekta? I guarantee you it’s one of them.

As a final note, I think Nathalie will be instrumental in helping the team identify Lila as the villain. They’re very unlikely to defeat her this season for good, but Nathalie knew about Lila’s little internship with Gabriel, and she was the one who originally had all the grimoire pages and Optigami identity data digitalized. She may recognize that information has been stolen or connect that Lila may have had the opportunity to physically take the butterfly miraculous by entering the lair. She’s in a unique spot because she’s the only one who knows this much about Lila’s villain plans, but also knows Ladybug’s identity now. I’m interested to see her role as a redeemed ally to the team.

Aaaaand that’s my novel length essay. Thanks for making it to the end. As always, I’m interested in hearing what other people think! (I feel like a YouTuber doing an outro lol) I’m excited to see the first episode soon which is actually gonna be the second episode I guess. So close! Off to an incredible start. I want to hear other theories!

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unfinishedslurs · 2 years ago

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welcome to eden

this is a love letter. inspired by this song

As soon as Steve picks up the phone, she knows she’s making a mistake.

“Rob?”

“No,” she says instead of hanging up like she should.

“Nancy?” He sounds more alert now, and she can picture him standing up straighter, calling to attention at the sound of her voice. “What’s wrong? Are you okay?”

“Not really,” she sniffs, hating herself for it. “I—can we talk?”

He’ll say no. He’ll say no, because it’s one in the morning and he was probably asleep before the phone rang and she shouldn’t be asking to talk years after she broke his heart and didn’t even remember—

“Of course,” he says, and Nancy could kick herself. “Over the phone?”

“No. Not over the phone. I’m sorry, it can wait, you can go back to bed.”

She hears him huff a laugh, even though there’s nothing funny about any of it. “I wasn’t in bed,” he assures her. “Am I picking you up?”

Tears spring anew to her eyes. “If that’s okay.”

“Works for me,” he says. “See you soon.”

“See you,” she echoes, and hangs up.

She spends the time it takes pacing quietly in front of the front door, berating herself for using him like this. But she needs to talk to him, and the sooner it’s over with the better.

Headlights cut through the window way too soon, and she nearly throws herself out the door.

She gives him a look when she opens the car door, telling him she knows how many traffic laws he must have broken to get here this quick. He just grins in return, ready to point out the felony in her closet.

“Where are we going?” He asks, and her heart clenches. He’s so good. He’s so good, and she couldn’t-can’t love him like he wants. She has to tell him.

Tonight probably wasn’t the best night for this conversation, but her skin feels like it’s peeling off and the faster she says something the quicker it will be over with and she can go back to how it was before. Back when she didn’t have anyone to talk to, because Robin might never speak to her again after she breaks her best friend's heart for the second time.

Just rip the bandaid off, Nance.

“I don’t know,” she says instead. Maybe she’s a coward. “A field? Somewhere I can see the stars.”

“I can do that.”

The drive goes by in silence, Nancy staring stubbornly out the window. She can feel Steve periodically checking on her, and she knows he wants to know why she called. She can’t open her mouth to say it in the suffocating enclosure of the car. She rolls down a window.

They get to a field almost out of Hawkins, and the car is barely in park before she’s climbing out, going around to sit on the hood. Steve cuts the engine and follows.

She still doesn’t say anything. She called him to have a talk, why can’t she just open her stupid mouth—

“Nancy?” Steve asks, gentle in a way that used to make her melt. She pulls her legs to her chest, feeling vulnerable. “What’s wrong?”

“Jonathan and I broke up,” she finally gets out.

“Oh shit.” He looks genuinely surprised. “That sucks, I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, well, it was never going to be forever.” Except she’d thought otherwise. She thought they were Nancy and Jonathan, the two of them against the world. She hunches her shoulders. “We never talk anymore, and he was pulling away from me, and he was lying to me for months-“ she shakes her head, clearing the anger she feels at that. “It doesn’t matter. I’m starting to realize there’s things I need to work on, too. A lot to work on, actually.”

“I don’t know what that could be,” he says, flashing her a smile filled with boyish, roguish charm. “You’re already the best person I know.”

She sniffs, and suddenly she’s crying into her knees, shoulders shaking. He freezes beside her, before wrapping an arm around her and pulling her into his side. She leans in for a second, chasing the comfort, before remembering what she came here to do and ripping away violently.

“Fuck,” she whispers. “Fuck, I’m so sorry. I don’t—I can’t—this isn’t what I—“

“Hey,” he soothes. “Slow down. Let it out.”

She wipes her eyes, suddenly furious. “I don’t want to date you,” she says, finally looking him in the eyes. “I don’t—I’m sorry for calling you. I just remembered how much better you used to make me feel, but then I realized that’s like…really shitty of me.”

“Why?” He asks, as if Nancy didn’t come out here to break his heart again. “I want to make you feel better. I like knowing I can make you feel better.”

“I don’t want to lead you on,” she says, mouth screwing up. “That’s why I called you out here. And I know it’s shitty of me—“

“Nancy, you’re not leading me on. I…I don’t want to date you either.”

That stops her in her tracks. “Oh.”

“Yeah, oh,” he echoes quietly. “I—don’t take this the wrong way, okay, ‘cause I know I’m gonna sound like an asshole saying it, but, uh, I can’t do that again. And even outside of that, I don’t like you that way anymore. Uh, sorry.”

She tries not to sag at the overwhelming relief she feels at that.

“Are you sure?” She studies him closely, trying to see if he’s saying this for her sake or if he means it. “Back in the Upside-Down, and when we were fighting Venca, it seemed…”

He grimaces, and Nancy thinks if it wasn’t dark she’d see the beginning of an embarrassed flush on his ears. “I…may have been feeling things,” he admits. “I was testing the waters, I guess. I started feeling nostalgic, and you were there, and everyone was encouraging me, and it all just ended up in this weird…feelings soup. Sorry.”

“You said you wanted to have six kids with me,” Nancy reminds him. “And travel the country in a Winnebago.”

He groans, covering his face with his hands. “I am,” he says, “so sorry. I don’t know why I said that. That had to be so weird for you.”

“It was kind of sweet?” She tries, not letting her relief show. Not yet.

“We haven’t been together in years, and I decided to tell you I used to dream about you having my babies. How do you deal with me?”

“Well it helps to know you were dropped on your head. Puts everything in perspective.”

“Yeah, yeah, yuk it up.” He looks at her, really looks at her, and she tries not to fidget under his gaze. Too earnest, too caring for someone who doesn’t deserve it. He’s always tried so hard. To woo her, to be a better person, to keep back the vicious streak she still sees in him. “I meant it, when I said I loved you,” he tells her gently, no sign of that cruelty that had him painting her as a whore for the whole town to see. “Back then, I mean. I just wanted you to know that.”

She wants to cry. “I know. I’m sorry I couldn’t say it back.”

“It’s okay,” he says like he means it. He leans back against the windshield, looking at the sky. After a moment, she copies him.

They watch the stars together, and the air feels clearer.

“Where do we go from here?” She asks, afraid of the answer.

“What do you mean?”

“What happens with us now?”

“Well,” he says gingerly, like he’s testing the waters. “I don’t know about you, but I’ve heard you’re a pretty kickass friend.”

Friends. She doesn’t know that she and Steve have ever been friends, not properly. Even after the apologies they made to each other, she doesn’t know that she could call what they had friendship. It wasn’t substantial on its own, needing Jonathan as the barrier between them. When it fell, so did they.

“I haven’t had a friend in a while,” she admits. “Robin is kind of a novelty for me. She’s amazing.”

It’s funny, in a way. She was so jealous of Robin, of how close she was with Steve in a way Nancy wasn’t. She’d thought, at first, that it was because they were so clearly dating. After Robin told her they weren’t, she realized how badly she’d just wanted friends. She missed hanging out with Steve, missed his laugh and his squint and his bitchy attitude. She’d hoped that eventually they’d get to that point, was sure they were almost there before Starcourt. In a way, she’d been jealous of Robin for stealing Steve. She knew it was ridiculous. Steve had found a friend, a real friend who hadn’t cheated on him or slept with his girlfriend. She couldn’t begrudge him that.

She just missed him.

“She is, isn’t she?” Steve grins, but sobers up quickly. “I didn’t really think about that. How lonely you must be, since…”

She’s already shaking her head. “It’s not your fault. I didn’t reach out.”

“I didn’t exactly reach out either.”

They fall silent again, at a loss for words. Barb’s death, as always, the canyon between them.

Finally Nancy huffs. “It’s both of our faults,” she declares, “or neither of our faults. I don’t know. I just missed you.”

“Well shit, Nance, I missed you too,” he says, touched.

“I’ve heard you’re a pretty kickass friend too, you know,” she says, glancing at him. He smiles.

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, Nancy Wheeler, I would be honored to be friends with you,” he says, and sticks out his hand to shake, like they’re meeting for the first time.

She stares at him, and starts laughing. “You’re an idiot, Steve Harrington.”

She shakes his hand.

Max has always felt like a mirror. One Nancy wanted to smash, pull her out of the shards of her reflective grief and hug. Stroke her hair the way she wanted someone to do for her and say you’ll get through this. So Max could hear it from someone who knows.

Except Nancy doesn’t know anything. Still drowns in her guilt, the ball and chain dragging her into the depths. She can’t help when she’s still such a mess, three years later.

Her hands clench when Mike says Max is pulling away from Lucas. She wishes she could look her in the eye and tell her you don’t have to be me. You can be better.

She’s Mike’s friend. They barely know each other outside of a quick hello as they cross paths or fighting monsters. Max has enough on her plate, she doesn’t need her friend’s weird older sister butting in to tell her how to mourn the right way.

Nancy just hopes she’s getting out of bed. Remembering to eat. Brushing her teeth. She had more cavities in the year after Barb died than she’d ever had in her life, and she knows Max doesn’t have insurance.

Now, sitting next to Max’s hospital bed, Nancy wishes she’d reached out.

With school back comes studying, and with studying comes Eddie Munson, in all his super-senior glory. Nancy is going to get him a diploma if it kills her.

He laughs when she tells him so. “Shit, Wheeler,” he says. “The day something manages to get you is the day this shithole goes down for good.”

Robin turns down her offer to form a study group. “I’m pretty sure if I joined, I’d just distract Eddie, and let him distract me, and we’d end up throwing things at each other until you killed us. Sorry. Steve’s going to help me study for finals, though!”

She looks at Steve, eyebrow raised. She’s pretty sure it’s fair to be dubious, since she was the reason Steve passed his finals in the first place.

“I’m her rubber duck,” he says as an explanation, and she nods in understanding.

Her mom isn’t about to let her study alone with a boy in her room, though, and especially not a boy like Eddie, so she drags him to the library three times a week. He complains, he bitches, he tells her he doesn’t care about his fucking history class anymore. She just hands him a Rubik’s Cube she found to keep his hands busy as she quizzes him.

Three sessions in, he slowly puts a worksheet down and screams into his hands.

“Stop that!” She kicks him in the shin. “If you get me kicked out of the library I’m never forgiving you.”

“I can’t do it,” he says, staring up at the ceiling. “I’m so fucking stupid, Nancy. I can’t even get past question two. Is this torture? Did I die and go to hell? That would be fitting, wouldn’t it? Doomed to repeat high school for the rest of eternity?”

“Stupid” her ass. She knows what kind of work goes into those campaigns of his, has absently flipped through his annotated fantasy novels and left feeling as if she’d seen the story anew. Plus, she went and made a tape of everyone’s favorite songs, just in case, and she knew damn well how quickly he’d taught himself to play the song he did in the Upside-Down. “Stupid” and “Eddie Munson” don’t belong in the same sentence, much less belong in the same space in his brain. She hates Hawkins High just a little bit more for it. “Stop being dramatic. What are you stuck on?”

“Fucking nothing! I can’t focus, it’s driving me fucking insane. I keep trying, I swear, but it’s like I can’t even read anymore! This always happens, I swear to God it’s killing me more than the fucking demobats ever did.”

“Don’t joke about that,” she snaps. “You’re smart, Eddie, you know that. You just need to try.”

His face twists, and she realizes that was the wrong thing to say.

“Oh, thank you, Miss Wheeler, why haven’t I thought of that? Sorry for wasting your time, I’ll get out of your perfect hair now—“

“Sit down,” she protests as he gathers up his stuff. “Eddie, I’ll help you work through the problem, okay? Just sit down, please.”

“No, Nancy!” He swings around, eyes wild. “It’s what everyone always says. Just sit still, stop doodling, be quiet, pay attention, try fucking harder…I tried, okay! I’ve been trying, I tried for fifteen fucking years, and I can’t do it! I might as well just drop out and get it over with. I’m fucking sick of this.”

“Okay!” She feels herself getting riled up. “You want to fail so bad, fine! I’m not your keeper, do whatever you want.”

“I will!”

“Fine!”

They stare at each other, not moving. Finally Eddie storms off in a huff, flinging open the library door in a grand gesture she pretends not to see. There’s a sinking feeling in her stomach, but she can ignore it.

She pretends not to notice when he comes slinking back five minutes later, shuffling his feet.

“Sorry.”

“For what?” She asks primly, going over her notes.

“Nancy, please.”

She sighs. “I’m sorry too. I’m just…frustrated.”

“I’ve been told I’m pretty frustrating,” he offers.

“It’s not…”

“It is,” he says, sitting down. “It’s okay. God knows I piss myself off with this shit.”

She studies him, looking over his defeated face like he’s one of her flashcards. “You’re trying your best,” she says, sounding it out. She can’t really make sense of it. After all, trying her best has always been straight A’s, not stopping until she knew everything she needed to and more.

“It’s not good enough.”

“It will be,” she says. “You’ve got me this time.”

“Listen, I know you’re trying to help—“

“Do you want fries?”

“What?” He blinks at her, shocked, as she starts packing up her things.

“We’re not getting anywhere today. Sometimes you have to step back, and come back with a clearer head.” Usually she locks her door and cleans her guns, the repetitive motion soothing her mind until she can think again, but she has a feeling that won’t work for Eddie.

“I usually just give up.”

“I don’t. Get your backpack, we’re going to the diner. Dinner’s on me tonight.”

At the diner, he makes her laugh so hard soda comes out her nose. The next day, they go to the library again.

After a couple of days, he solves the cube. After three weeks, he nearly kicks her door down rushing to show her the B he got on a test.

Two months later, he throws his cap into the air and his cane on the ground. Swings her around, both of them laughing.

“Nancy fucking Wheeler!” He crows. “Achieving the impossible yet again!”

“Eddie, put me down!” She shrieks gleefully as he stumbles. She barely makes it back to solid ground before two more bodies are slamming into them, Steve and Robin whooping in their ears.

It was weird, to see Steve and Robin effortlessly communicate the way she and Jonathan always had and have it be so unabashedly unromantic. She’d always thought that knowing someone like that was a sign you were meant to be, and they did it while still loudly proclaiming Platonic with a capital P.

She and Jonathan didn’t do it much anymore. It was like dancing to a song that was always a beat off, syncing for just one moment before stumbling again, unsure that they were still allowed this.

She’d known him better than anyone, once, and he’d known her the same. Now she wonders if that was ever true.

“So,” Eddie says, throwing himself onto her bed. “Steve.”

She sits in her desk chair, raising an eyebrow. “What about him?”

“You broke up with Jonathan, right? Are you going to get back with him? I thought you would, but it's been months and neither of you said anything.”

“No,” she says. “No, that’s not what I want. It’s not what either of us want.”

“Really?” He rolls over, eyes searching. “What happened there, anyway? With both your boys. I’m a nosy little asshole, and I wanna hear it from you.”

It makes her laugh, the way he admits to it so freely. He grins wolfishly at her, baring his teeth in a grin. That’s probably why she tells him the truth.

“I wasn’t okay, when I was with Steve,” she says honestly. “I was distant, grieving…I was a mess, and I stayed with him because I didn’t know what else to do. With Jonathan…I was getting closure, I was healing, and things were good between us. They were so good, but after a while, we just started to…deteriorate. I don’t know if we lost momentum, or if the stress just got to us, but we started fighting more and more,” She traces the desk with a finger, remembering the sour taste of Oliver Twist on her tongue. It was a shitty thing to say. “I thought we’d figured it out, for a little while, but then we just…stopped talking. I think, maybe if we’d talked more, we could have worked it out. But I’m…not upset that we didn’t, you know?”

It’s a different kind of loneliness when your partner won’t talk to you. It was different than grieving, different than not having anyone to talk to at all. Because even when she didn’t have friends, she had Jonathan. And then, slowly, she didn’t anymore.

“Nancy, you’re one of my best friends, so-”

“Steve is your best friend.”

“Steve is my best best friend,” she agrees. “But he’s also more than that? Like, I think we’re literally soulmates. Platonic with a capital P soulmates, but, like, it feels like more than friendship sometimes? Like sometimes it’s like he can literally feel my bad days even when I haven’t talked to him yet. He told me once he just knows sometimes. It’s like I hit my hip on my desk and he felt it, but emotionally. It’s wild. It’s like the drugs literally combined our minds. Where was I going with this?”

“I don’t know,” she says, slightly bewildered. She wants to ask how they do that, but Robin barrels forward.

“Right. So outside of mine and Steve’s platonic more-than-friendship, you’re kind of my best friend? And you’re, like, the coolest person I know.”

She blinks. She’s not sure she’s ever been described as cool before.

After Barb, Nancy tried to cut her own hair.

Her mom found her in the bathroom, unshed tears in her eyes and hair a mess on the sink and floor.

She hadn’t laughed, hadn't said oh, honey, your beautiful hair. Just clucked her tongue and took the scissors from her hands. Stepped behind her and took over, took the uneven mess and made it something good, something presentable.

She didn’t say anything until she was done, setting the scissors on the counter. “Sometimes,” she said, wetting her lips. “Sometimes we need a change, before we can move forward.”

The closer she gets to Emerson, the more she feels like she’s letting someone down. Mike. Max. Jonathan. All the people who have relied on her, all the people who trusted her to fight.

In a strange turn of events, her mom is the only one she doesn’t feel is disappointed in her. Her mom is more excited about college than she is sometimes. Chattering excitedly over dishes about the classes she’s going to take as Nancy dries and smiles and tries not to feel like the ground is being pulled from under her feet.

This is everything she’s ever wanted. Why does it feel so wrong?

She takes Eddie to the gun range, because having a gun in her hands has always made her feel safer. More in control. More like the badass protector she wants to be, than the scared little girl she feels sometimes.

Eddie stares down the scope of the gun and shoots like he has experience, but doesn’t hit a single bullseye.

“Your hands are shaking.”

“I’m in a fucking gun range and a bunch of small town hicks were hunting me not too long ago,” he snaps, taking another shot and missing the target completely. He swears and changes the magazine. “Excuse me if I’m a little bit on edge.”

She hadn’t really thought of it like that. “You didn’t have to come,” she says. “I just thought with everything that’s happened, you should know how to use one. Just in case.”

“I know how to use a gun,” he rolls his eyes.

“You know how to shoot one.” She looks from him to the target pointedly. “Not the same thing.”

“Deep. I could really feel the judgement there. Tell me, is there anything else wrong with me?”

“There’s security cameras all over this place. We’re not in Hawkins, so there’s no mob coming after you. I’m here, and I do know how to use a gun. No one is going to hurt you here.”

“I know all that.”

“Do you?”

He scowls at her. She looks back unflinchingly. She’s been here plenty of times, and the guys laughed at her until they didn’t anymore. By the time she brought Eddie, all she got was a raised eyebrow and a “boyfriend?” from Hunter at the desk. She didn’t know what was more incriminating, so she just shrugged.

“You’re kind of a pain in the ass, you know that?”

She rolls her eyes, taking the gun from his hands and lining up a shot. “I’ve heard worse,” she says, thinking about Nancy Dre-ew, and Nancy “the slut” Wheeler, and priss, and shoots. It hits the bullseye.

So do her next five shots.

Eddie looks begrudgingly impressed when she reloads and hands the gun back to him. It’s more satisfying than it should be, to realize that while he’d known she had guns he’s never seen her actually shoot before.

She raises a challenging eyebrow at him, and he huffs around a smile. “All right, all right,” he says good naturedly. “Let’s try this again.”

He does a little better this time around, now that he’s actually trying. He does a little dance when he hits one of the inner rings.

“Take that!” He crows. “I bet Steve couldn’t do this. In your face, Harrington!”

“He’s much more of a close-combat kind of guy, isn’t he?” Nancy agrees.

“Oh, yeah, definitely,” he says. “Does he really have a bat with nails?”

She blinks, caught off guard by the fact that Eddie hadn’t seen it. She never registered that he hadn’t used it during Vecna. Something about the fact seems weird somehow, as if it was as integral to Steve as his coiffed hair. “He keeps it in his trunk.”

“You and Byers need to update your Steve manuals. He said it’s under his bed now.”

“Ah,” Nancy says, thinking of all the times she’s slept with her pistol under her pillow. Empty, because she’s not stupid enough to sleep with a loaded gun when her little brother sometimes wakes her up after a nightmare, but the comforting weight of it alone makes it easier.

“Just tell me one thing,” he says, widening his eyes imploringly at her. “Did he look as sexy as I think he did? Byers won’t give me a straight answer.”

It’s a joke, but his cheeks are a little pink. She’s not dumb, she’s seen the looks the two of them share, as if he and Steve were circling each other. Caught in a whirlpool, waiting for the moment the vortex would drag them down and they could finally touch.

The looks between Eddie and Jonathan, too, that share a certain camaraderie she doesn’t entirely understand and at the same time understands all too well. Steve and Jonathan had always had a strange relationship, too close to not be friendship but not quite there. Surprisingly enough it was better after she and Steve broke up, Jonathan no longer avoiding them and the talk she’d forced the three of them into clearing the air. Sometimes, she’d wake up to Jonathan climbing into her bed, smelling of cigarettes and a hint of something stronger, and he’d tell her it was Steve who drove him there.

She’s a journalist. It’s her job to notice things. She just wasn’t ready to confront that reality, where the two boys she’d wanted wanted each other as well. But she’s grown since then.

She also knows that whoever Steve chooses, it won’t be easy.

“You know,” she says, considering, “when we were dating, Steve never pressed me up against the wall or anything you’d expect from the King.”

Eddie gets this look on his face, caught between confusion and caught out. “…okay? Did you want him to do that or something? Are you trying to ask me to hint to him?”

“No,” she says. “I’m just saying, he never did any of that. It was kind of funny. He always made it so that he was the one pressed against the wall.”

Eddie misses the next five shots entirely, and she laughs at him through it all.

She’s hyper aware of touching other girls now. She didn’t used to be. Even with Robin, who is a lesbian and definitely won’t hate her. Who’s probably gone through the same thing. She can’t help it.

What if they get the wrong idea? What if someone else sees? What if they can tell, what if they know, what if they hate me?

She hates feeling like this. She doesn’t know why it started, doesn’t know what’s wrong with her. She’s no stranger to casual affection—or at least she didn’t used to be. Why does it make her feel so tense now? It’s been years since she realized she liked girls, shouldn’t this have happened back then?

Deep down, she knows why. The Reagan sign in her front yard. Her dad sitting in his chair, the news always on. “Always that nasty disease, Karen, I swear some people are just asking for it.” She’s always known she could never tell him, but now she knows that if she gets sick he’ll say she deserves it. She doesn’t know what her mother thinks. She’s afraid to find out.

She’s growing up, and her fear is growing with her.

Objectively, Nancy knows she and Eddie don’t make sense.

They’re not cut from the same cloth, like Steve and Robin. They don’t calm each other down, like Jonathan and Argyle. They’re too different, too alike in all the wrong ways, for them to get along. They’re both snappy, a little mean. Eddie’s dramatic enough to get on her nerves, and she’s prim enough to get on his. At their worst, they have earth shattering arguments that end in them not speaking to each other for days.

When people see them walking down the street together, they whisper about “that nice girl Nancy Wheeler” and “that awful Munson boy.”

It’s not fair, never has been. Nancy hasn’t felt nice for a long time, maybe before Barb ever disappeared. Eddie isn’t always particularly nice either, but the court of public opinion takes it to extremes, twists him into something cruel instead of the kindness he carries under his leather armor. Someone to keep their children away from. It really is a shame, because Eddie loves kids in a way Nancy never has. She can see it in the way he interacts with them, his bright smile fading when a parent comes to drag them away. Even when he’s expecting it, his face falls, just for an instant, before spinning around with a grin that won’t reach his eyes.

Nancy wants to take him out of here. There’s an offer on the tip of her tongue that she knows he’d refuse.

He’s not her brother, but he’s not…unlike one. It’s almost like talking to an older, flashier Mike. He’s annoying, is what he is. He picks at her, keeps pressing over the littlest things. Tries to get under her skin, succeeds, until she’s on the verge of stabbing him with her pencil. Looks triumphant whenever Robin has to grab her arm to drag her away, rambling an excuse about “some girl thing I totally forgot, yeah it’s an emergency,” while Steve drags him the other way to have bro time.

“She loves it,” she’d heard Eddie crow delightedly once, when Robin didn’t get her out of hearing range fast enough. “Do you see that fire in her eyes?”

“Do I?” She asked Robin. “Love it?”

“I mean, far be it from me to tell you what you do and don’t like,” Robin answered. “But, uh, as far as I can tell, you totally love it. You look like you’re going to rip him to pieces and enjoy it, and he loves that. I didn’t think you’d be this much of a nightmare together, seriously, like, how are you two at each other’s throats one second and then best friends the next? Steve and I have debated locking you in a bathroom until you get along, but we’re kind of afraid you’ll kill each other.”

So no, Nancy and Eddie don’t get along. They’re kind of a nightmare together. They don’t make sense, and they don’t try to. They have other friends, who they get along with better, that they can seek out.

But when Eddie knocks on her window, the only surprise is that he could even get there.

“How?” She hisses, opening the window. He tumbles in, doesn’t even try to play off the utter gracelessness he’s displaying.

“Wowie, I am never doing that again,” he breathes, flat on his back. “You’re going to have to help me down the stairs when I leave, had to leave my cane at the bottom and I cannot get back down that way.”

She doesn’t even want to know what he had to do to get up on her roof with his bad leg. “What are you doing here?”

“I’m but another lover, nothing but an ant in the face of your unwavering beauty, my queen,” he says, batting his eyes at her. The dramatics don’t hit the way he intends, given that he’s stuck on the floor. He holds a hand out pleadingly, and she rolls her eyes, hauling him up until she can get him to her bed.

“Never mind.” She puts her hands on her hips, a gesture that is so obviously Steve she removes them immediately. From the glint in Eddie’s eyes, he notices.

She tries not to be jealous. She tries, she swears, but…

Three of the four (five? she doesn’t know what Argyle thinks of her) friends she has are dating each other. Two of them dated her, first. She can’t help but wonder, if she’d known that was an option, if everything would have been different. If she wouldn’t have this aching bitterness between her teeth.

(Nothing would have changed, she knows. She’d been too desperate for other things. Trying so hard with Steve so her best friend didn’t die for nothing. Staying with Jonathan because he understood her more than anyone else, so maybe they didn’t need to talk. It wouldn’t have helped anything. She still wonders.)

It doesn’t matter. What’s past is past, and she needs to move forward. She can’t stop to think about could-have-beens, because thinking about boys is what got her into this mess in the first place.

She closes her eyes, taking a shaky breath. That’s not fair. None of this is fair. None of it is fucking fair because Nancy stopped caring about fair when Barb died.

She needs a drink. She needs a nap. She needs to stop feeling like Atlas with the world on her shoulders.

She doesn’t do any of that. She calls Robin.

“Barb was my first kiss.”

“Really?”

“Yeah,” Nancy says, and keeps talking, because Barb is dead and Robin is a lesbian and she’s long forgotten what Barb’s favorite chapstick was back then. “We were seven, and I liked it but I didn’t know if I liked her. But I was convinced I was going to marry her, until my mom told me that girls don’t marry other girls. And I knew she liked girls when she died. She told me when we were fifteen, and I didn’t know the word bisexual but I knew I loved her and that was all that mattered. Not—not like that, not romantic, or maybe it was but it doesn’t matter because she was my best friend and I still love her but she’s gone forever. I loved her.”

She feels Robin lay a tentative hand on her back.

“I had to look her parents in the eye and pretend. All those fucking NDA’s, I had to pretend there was hope. Pretend she was still missing. It was like everyone forgot about her except for me and them, and they sold their house to find their dead daughter and I wasn’t supposed to say anything and Steve kept reminding me about the fucking NDA’s—“

“Nancy…”

“It’s my fault,” Nancy says, staring at the water. “I lumped in Steve, because it was easier than being alone. He didn’t know her like I did. She was worried about me. She stayed because she cared, and look where that got her.”

“That’s bullshit!” Robin’s eyes are wide, and she waves her hands around as she talks. “If it’s anyones fault, it’s those—those scientist guys experimenting on El! They knew there was a problem, and they tried to cover it up instead of making sure people were safe. You didn’t know it was dangerous. How were you supposed to know it was going to end up as anything other than normal teenage drama? None of this is supposed to be real, you didn’t know—“

“But I left her,” Nancy cuts in. “I left her alone to go lose my virginity to a boy she didn’t even like—“

“He was your boyfriend, it shouldn’t have mattered if she liked him—“

“It doesn’t matter!” Nancy shouts, and Robin falls silent, mouth still moving. “It doesn’t fucking matter how it happened, because it did and now she’s dead and she’s never coming back and it’s all my fault.”

Nancy is sick of crying. Sick of feeling helpless. Sick of not being able to change the past.

“It’s not just Barb. I took Fred to the trailer park—he didn’t even want to be there, and now he’s dead. Eddie needs a cane, Max is almost completely blind and might never walk again and it was my plan that put them there. My plan that almost killed them. I’m responsible—“

“Fuck that.”

“Robin…”

“No, you listen to me, Nancy Wheeler,” Robin says, grabbing her by the shoulders. “You are one of the most remarkable people I have ever known. Max would have died without that plan. We all would have died. Venca-slash-Henry-slash-One would have won without that plan, and I am not going to sit here and listen to you blame yourself for saving lives. And-and Fred! Venca had already marked him, you know that. You couldn’t have done anything! And Barb is not your fault, okay? I-I-I know I can’t convince you, but I’ll say it as many times as it takes until you start believing it, because it’s true. You didn’t kill her. You didn’t kill anyone.”

“I killed Bruce,” she says, just to prove Robin wrong. And isn’t that shitty of her, to forget about him until she can use him to prove a point? She’s a fucking awful person.

“I don’t know who Bruce is, but given your track record I highly doubt that.”

“I bashed his head in with a fire extinguisher.”

Robin pauses, and Nancy’s stomach sinks. This is it, she thinks. This is what will convince her, this is what will make her see that I’m wrong, that I’m poison-

“What was he doing?”

“What?”

“Bruce. You had to have a reason for it. What was he doing?”

It’s like Robin doesn’t even care that Nancy just admitted to first degree murder. “He was flayed,” she admits, knowing Robin will take it as proof that she’s right.

“That’s not murder, that’s self defense,” Robin says, just like she knew she would. “Also, if he was flayed he was already dead. Sorry, I’m sticking to your side on this.”

“But I’m less torn up about killing my asshole coworker than I am about anything else. How does that not make me a monster?”

“He was already dead, Nancy!” Robin shakes her. “You’re not beating yourself up over it because you know he was already dead, a-a-and I know you’re using him to try and push me away and I won’t let you.”

“Robin…” she says, tears springing to her eyes. She’s so fucking sick of crying. So sick of the way she never seems to stop anymore.

“Nancy,” Robin says. “None of us are going to leave you. Stop trying to make us.”

She pulls her into a hug, and Nancy sags into it, boneless.

There, sandwiched between the sky and the water, Nancy starts to feel like she could forgive herself.

“Nancy,” Steve says, putting a hand on her shoulder and ducking his chin to look her in the eye. “They won’t be alone.”

Tears well up, unbidden, at the way he seems to understand her now in a way he never did before.

“I want this,” she insists.

“I know you do,” he says. “Which is why you’re going to go out there, kick ass, and take names. We’ll be here, okay? We’ll keep an eye on them.”

“I know you will.” She swipes a hand across her eyes. “Can you talk to Holly, too? She gets lonely.”

Steve smiles. He’d always loved Holly, when they were dating. He used to braid her hair sometimes. Asked her about her drawings, her TV shows, listened to her talk with the same attentiveness Nancy’s father had never shown any of them. He’ll be a good dad, someday. To someone else’s children.

“I’ll talk to Holly,” he promises. “Does she still like princesses?”

“Ladybugs,” she says. “It’s ladybugs, now.”

“Ladybugs. I can do that. Black and red, and they’re all ladies. What’s not to like?”

“There are male ladybugs.”

“Wait, seriously?”

She laughs, tearfully, but they’re happy tears. Steve wipes them away gently, and she smiles at him to let him know she’s okay. “You’re an idiot, Steve Harrington.”

“You’re the best person I know, Nancy Wheeler,” he replies, achingly sincere. “You’re gonna have the whole world under your thumb, I just know it. Ever thought of running for President?”

“Can’t be worse than the one we have now,” she says, grimaces as her own joke lands too bitterly to be funny. She sees his jaw tighten before he forces himself to relax.

“I’d vote for you.”

She grins at him, sharp to punch through the tension she’d made. “I’ll make Eddie my Vice President.”

“Oh, fuck no. You lost me,” he says, and Eddie makes an offended noise from where he’s stealing snacks from the glovebox. Jonathan swats him, and she smiles at him too. He smiles back, tentatively, and wanders to her side.

“You gonna be okay up there?” He asks quietly. She can hear the guilt in it, still, and she reaches down to squeeze his hand. The one with the scar that matches hers, so their palms line up. It feels full circle, somehow, the three of them together like this.

“I’ll be okay,” she confirms, and feels the truth of it in her chest. Her boys are here with her, the ones who have been there since the beginning. Eddie’s watching them fondly, munching on a granola bar. Robin is inside somewhere, rambling at her mother. Mike and Holly are probably still bickering over the last cupcake. She loves them so much, all of them.

“Of course you will,” Steve says. “You’re Nancy fuckin’ Wheeler. Nothing stops you.”

She wants that to be true. She can feel in her bones that it will be. Eighteen has nothing on who she’ll be at thirty.

She’s Nancy Wheeler, and the world won’t see her coming.

#welcome to eden au #stranger things fanfic #nancy wheeler #eddie munson #steve harrington #robin buckley #jonathan byers #this is the biggest thing i've posted so far #i ran out of the little fics i'm gonna have to start figuring out how to format the big ones #there's background steve/eddie/jonathan bc this was originally a companion piece to a seperate fic about them #that was 22k before i lost interest #i'll post that one eventually #can you tell nancy is my favorite character. i love u miss survivors guilt <3 #sometimes i think about how nancy has no friends for p much three seasons after barb died and i get very upset #jonathan could count but he also wanted to date her so i'm not counting it #I JUST WANT HER TO HAVE FRIENDS #i also love nancy/eddie friendship they're both judgy bitches #so is steve frankly. nightmare trio #i'm gonna write that ot3 one day (don't hold me to that)

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