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saintheartwing · 4 years ago

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Undertales of Friendship: I am Jerry

Rainbow Dash took in a long, firm, deep breath, and then pushed the door open, violet eyes looking all around the bookstore. She was determined to find the next Daring Do novel that had come out. True, the blue-furred Pegasus had to confess, most of the copies were sold out according to Twilight, but she wanted to try to find it all the same.

"I'm sure there's a copy in here SOMEWHERE." She told Twilight as the two made their way down the bookstore's ailes. Rainbow Dash glanced left and right, peering at the various Daring Do novels on sale before taking notice of someone who was looking over a large book just across from Daring Do's latest installment: "Daring Do and the Crystal Skull". She'd heard mixed reviews about this one, but that wasn't what got her attention. No, what got her attention was the ugly old schmuck reading the immense book nearby. It was JERRY. Jerry, the UFO-shaped monster, who was looking into a book on monster-human relations and...

Looking over it with an odd, almost unearthly white Earth Pony that almost looked familiar, with deep black eyes. "Well, what do you think?" The Earth Pony inquired of Jerry.

Jerry raised a existent eyebrow. "This is is all Daring Do's research based on her expeditions to the Monster Ruins and the Underground she's done?"

"Yes. Do you find it to your liking, pray tell?" The Earth Pony asked. "I admit, it's still a first edition, it's getting updated every time a new discovery is made."

"There's nothing in here about my family, and little about humans that isn't just plain ridiculous." Jerry said. "EPIC FAIL."

"Your EXISTENCE is an Epic Fail." Rainbow Dash remarked as Jerry and the Earth pony turned around, the Earth Pony sighing as he stepped slightly away, Jerry "harrumphing" as the odd-smelling monster glared at her. "I didn't think a bully like you would even know how to read."

"If I know how to wifi, I know how to read." Jerry snidely commented. "What is the big jock Rainbow Dash doing here? Shouldn't you be blowing apart clouds for fun?"

"I'll have you know I'm not just some dumb jock. I've read ALL the Daring Do novels and know every one of them by heart. She's a brilliant, amazing archeologist and I won't have you trashing ANY of her work!" Rainbow Dash insisted, slamming a hoof on her chest as Jerry tossed the book he had at her, the book THWACKING her in the face.

"It's a load of crap. She doesn't know anything about what really happened." He said, Twilight raising an eyebrow up. Huh?

"Does anyone, really?" The Earth Pony mysteriously mused, vanishing into the nearby aisles almost like a ghost as Rainbow Dash snorted.

"And you would?" She inquired, picking up the book and trotting off to go put it back as Gerald folded his arms over his chest, then sighed as he walked towards the 'History' section, picking up a biography that Mettaton had written, which brought up his grandfather, the Royal Magician for the Kingdom of Monsters...one of the monsters who had taught humans the art of magic.

"...yeah. I would." Jerry softly muttered as Twilight approached him, a notebook hovering out of her belt pouch as she took out a quill.

"Whatever do you mean?"

"Like you really wanna hear. And it's a long story."

"No, I do. I'm a student of magic. I like long stories." Twilight insisted with a nod. "Please, tell me everything you can. Don't you want to talk about yourself?" She added with a small smile, trying to appeal to his vanity before she saw Jerry's eyes gain a quality she'd never seen before.

"It ain't about ME."

...

...He held his hand up, trying to focus, cringing as he grit his teeth. His body shook, vibrating intensely as faint light glowed off his body, and the long-haired human concentrated hard as he could. Deep brown eyes gazed intensely at the gold coin below him as his teacher sat nearby, calmly waiting.

"Magic is more than just knocking things down. This is very simple, Leopold."

Leopold cringed. His grey hair felt hot and heavy against the longsleeve white shirt he wore, and he panted and heaved, light glowing more fiercely off his form. But though it emanated brightly off his body, the gold coin remained on the ground in the large stony church hall. Soft light filtered in through the stained glass windows of the Holy Roman Empire's finest purchase in the valley, casting the room in a soft glow of natural light.

But still, despite his best efforts, Leopold couldn't get the coin to rise up. Though it shook and shook back and forth on the stony grey floor beneath him...

It wouldn't rise. He flopped onto his cotton panted behind, groaning, scratching at the golden circlet he wore atop his head as his teacher frowned, shaking his unique head back and forth. "I cannot do it! 'Tis simply impossible!"

"One who believes in the impossible will never get ANYTHING done." Gerald remarked, the circlet-wearing monster walking towards Leopold and the coin, nonchalantly placing a long-armed hand right on Leopold's shoulder. Gerald the Monster Magician was a unique specimen, his entire body was a head, with a large, mountain-like middle atop of an oblong frame, with long, thin arms and three thin legs. He had faint freckles on his pale form, and three spikes atop his long and tall "hill" that was the central region of his head, and the golden circlet on his head displayed the symbol of the Kingdom of Monsters, proudly gleaming in the light of the church. "Now."

He tightened his grip on Leopold's arm, the youth cringing before rising back up, Gerald holding his hand. "Alright. Alright." The human magician sighed, holding his other hand up again, Gerald closing his eyes and calmly breathing and out. The young human's body faintly glowed, Gerald's eyes shooting open as a glitter came to his pupils, and Leopold could see the coin rising higher and higher, finally depositing itself in the nearby poor box as Leopold lowered his hand.

"There. Was that truly so difficult?" Gerald inquired.

"But I only succeeded because you were holding my hand." Leopold protested, shaking his head back and forth, long hair flopping about. "Such an action is hardly commendable."

"Leopold, I am all about bringing out potential. I shall do the same with you that Smartblook did with his apprentice, the very first royal magician. But even better, for I shall not explode after I perform a spell, and neither will you." Gerald promised, taking Leopold's hands and shaking them, giving him a wry smile.

"Gerald, REALLY!" Leopold said with an admonishing frown. "The man was blown to pieces! The court was amazed his spirit survived and transformed into a ghost!" He then scratched his head. "Which makes me wonder. When is a ghost a monster spirit and when is it a human spirit?"

"What I've always wondered is where the skeleton family cometh from." Gerald confessed as they exited the church, hands behind his back as he walked down the long path, past people who were staring and glaring at Gerald. They were somewhat staring at Leopold, but most of their bile seemed to be directed at Gerald. "There are tales that they're not normal monsters at all, but descendants of humans. But I feel the answer may be something else entirely. Their unique bloodline magic that allows them to manipulate matter in such a way makes me feel as though they're otherworldly."

"But I can lift matter about and the like when you assist me."

"Thus, my hypothesis. Their form of magic is meant to be used by humans. I've yet to met a single monster who can do what they do, but human magicians all know that type of spell quite easily."

"I KNOW it, but I surely cannot DO it."

"Give it time." Gerald said calmly, nodding at Leopold. "You'll find the type of magic that's your forte, and you'll do spectacularly with my guidance, of this I've no-"

But before he could finish, a faintly draconic, faintly bird-like monster with icy wings bumped hard into Gerald as he passed by in the road, Gerald cringing as he nursed his shoulder, Frostdrake smirking slightly at the unfortunate teacher. "My apologies, Gerald. I meant to hit your pet monkey."

Leopold was about to step forward, but Gerald held a hand up, shaking his head back and forth, his human student glancing about. Hundreds of eyes were upon them all, peering out from windows, or watching from across the way, peering out of alleys. The city was on the border of the kingdoms, a joint venture between monster and human, but monsters had a slight majority. It would not be prudent to act.

Frowning slightly but sighing, Leopold stepped back as Gerald dusted himself off, Frostdrake smirking. "You've trained your monkey well."

"One day you will find we shall ALL walk down the street together." Gerald just said, Frostdrake giving him a "harrumph" as the two made their way towards the front gate to go to their usual spot out in the large stretch of plains that surrounded the city. A faintly fish-like woman in powerful-looking silver and grey armor stood there at the drawbridge, standing by the crank with a gauntleted hand resting on it, golden eyes narrowed slightly.

"Gerald, I must ask. Why is it it that you teach this human magic? Many of our kind are unsettled at the prospect of a human gaining our boon. A human having such power is discomforting to us."

"Well, now you know how my kind feel every single day here." Leopold harshly snapped back, arms folded across his chest as Melusine the Royal Guard's black pupiled eyes looked him over. "What, pray tell, should stop one such as yourself from entering our homes and killing us in our slumber? Even a whelp such as I could wrestle a knife-wielding drunk to the ground. Should you or one such as Pyrope or Frostdrake enter my home with the desire to kill, we would be in pieces before we could take so much as a step. Every day we fear we may anger one of you too much, and you will lash out and make us perish."

"Our concern is that if you are taught magic, our own kind will be less powerful. We will have no advantages, we will be lessened and made weak." Melusine commented quietly.

"Did the works of Jesus the Christ taketh away from the works of Moses? Or did they not build upon the majesty of the Lord, God? The raising of one does not equal the lowering of another." Gerald reasoned as he placed his hands together and slightly bowed his head, Melusine looking the two over, thoughtfully rubbing her chin.

"Perhaps you present a fair point." She confessed freely. "Enjoy your time out there. I've much to do. The new recruits to the Royal Guard are foolish little pups who have much disicipline to be whipped into them."

"I hope thou will be slightly more lenient on thy child than your newcomers to the guard." Gerald offered as Melusine rested a hand on her swollen belly and chuckled. "How is the little one doing?"

"Undyne is a kicker." Melusine giggled softly, turning the crank on the drawbridge and allowing the two to walk over the moat and towards a far-off bench, sitting down as a soft wind blew and they just allowed its touch to drift over them. The grass in the plains drifted about in the wind as Leopold slightly hesitated, and then spoke.

"Gerald, I must ask of you. Why me? Why did you not choose another human to teach magic with? After all, the former Royal Magician asked to teach that delightful young human prince, and even though his tragic accident has left him an apparition, he still is able to impart much. But why did you not choose, perhaps, the new acolyte of magic over in the new world I've heard of? In the land of Arcadia, they speak tales of him and his mastery over elemental magic, which is in dire need of a steady hand to guide him." Leopold confessed. "Would you not have leapt at the chance to work for a future master of the elements? I don't even know what my truest talent is."

"You shall discover it the same way my family did. I chose you because I see in you myself." Gerald confessed. "I...my species is unique among monsters. We have no abilities of our own but the skill to empower others. Without helping others, we are nothing. Worthless. We are the runt of the litter, looked down upon for the little we can do. But I see greatness in you." Gerald offered, the monster taking Leopold's hand. "And I want to bring that out."

"It must be hard knowing that you can't match others efforts in magical skill. That if someone such as Frostdrake should persecute you, you cannot do much."

"Another reason I and my family sympathize with you. We are much in the same boat, and might as well be humans ourselves. Birds of a feather must flock together." Gerald said, giving Leopold a firm handshake before leaning back on the bench, gazing out at the grassy plains. The sunset was casting golden rays that danced upon the meadows that surrounded the high walls of the city, the main castle far off in the distance as he sighed. "Everything is so beautiful in the sunlight, no matter what time of day it is."

Leopold nodded softly, smiling in delight. "I could sit here and look at this forever. But I must also say, I've...not truly thanked thee for taking me under your wing."

Gerald simply smiled. "I require no gratitude. Your success will be...epic. Of this I've no doubt."

...

... Twilight's mouth slightly gaped, her notebook lowered in her hooves as she looked at Jerry, the white-furred earth pony watching from afar, sitting in a chair as he calmly rested his hooves in his lap. Jerry quietly finished his tale, sighing as he took out his cell phone, beginning to text. "So...now you know why monsters hate my family."

"...did...you start acting this way because they hated your family for their relationship with humans, or were you like this before, though?" Twilight inquired as Jerry slightly shrugged.

"I don't even remember anymore. All I remember is the hate." He mumbled, texting away on his cell phone before putting it away. "My grandpa was the first one up against the wall when monsters decided to get even with human sympathizers, along with anyone else who taught humans magic."

"That's horrible!" Twilight said, cringing before Jerry gave her a look.

"Don't get too up on your moral high horse, pony. What about your kind and how you treat Changelings? You guys STILL don't trust 'em much even though you got a truce. Name a single Changeling shopkeeper or author or something that you've got in this town or Canterlot or ANYWHERE."

Twilight cringed more harshly at this, slightly looking away. It was true, truce with Chrysalis or not, many a pony still did NOT like Changelings.

"Everyone has treated everyone like crap." Jerry muttered. "And they always will find some reason to do it. It's a lesson I had to learn early."

"I don't think that's true. Didn't Leopold love your grandfather for all he did?"

"..." Jerry bit his lip. "...not everyone can be like ol' Leo. Or like Frisk. Or even like you, egghead." He said, heading for the exit, reaching for the doorknob before briefly turning back around. "...and don't tell anyone I told you this." He muttered. "Not like anyone would care. I don't really need a pity party from 'em. I just wanted you to understand."

With that, he opened the door and headed out, Twilight sighing as she watched him go, Rainbow Dash trotting over to her, the newest Daring Do novel in her mouth.

"God 'id!" She proclaimed, blinking as she saw Twilight's face, putting the novel in her own satchel. "What's with you?"

"Sometimes I wonder if there's anything you can do for people who grow up being taught they're hated." Twilight admitted.

"Is this about Jerry? Folks hate him cuz he's gross-looking and smells bad." Rainbow Dash muttered, rolling her eyes.

"They don't just hate HIM. He's told me they've hated his entire family for years. Can you imagine what that must do to someone?" Twilight asked. "How do you change how people feel about you when hating you is all they've known?"

"If Chrysalis can do it, why can't he?"

"But you don't even really LIKE her."

"...guess you're right." Rainbow Dash admitted with a shrug. "But I'm not as smart as you. I don't have the answer to that. What IS someone supposed to do?"

Twilight looked out the window of the bookstore, Jerry sitting on a bench across the way, head hung as he texted on his cell phone, and she sighed.

"...I don't know."

#Undertale #Undertales #My Little Pony #My Litte Pony Friendship is Magic #MLP #MLP:FiM #Crossovers #fanfiction #fanfic #CrossOver #Jerry #Twilight Sparkle #rainbow dash

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callmemrscurtis · 7 years ago

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Headcannons for the boys when Netflix started trending

I’m gonna rant real quick idk wtf happened but apparently this didn’t post last night so Here It Is Now

Darry: -I think we all know it took some persuasion from Pony to invest in an account but after a while he gave in and got the up to four screens at a time pack

-Was highkey pissed when all the boys started freeloading off of it

-He’s all comfy in bed at like 9:30 getting ready to watch OISNB and he gets the message on his tv telling him that too many people are watching at once -He checks who’s using HIS account

-He picks up his old ass phone (idk but it’s pink and has the coiled wire the bell phones)

-“GOD DAMN IT, STEVE! I JUST WANTED TO WATCH ORANGE IS THE NEW BLACK IN PEACE AND I GET MY SNACK READY JUST FOR ME TO SEE YOU’RE PLAYING THREE DIFFERENT THINGS AT ONCE?”

- He’s all causal eating popcorn “Listen, Darry. They just put Moana as an option and then I saw that they have Finding Dory too and I don’t have time to watch them separately so-”

-“STEVE!”

-“PS Baby Dory is a-dor-a-ble. Totally deserved more screen time.”

-“STEVEN RANDLE!“

-“Although…I do like Ellen Degeneres’ performance…I find it quite modern and realistic.”

-“JUST TURN ONE OFF SO I CAN WATCH MY SHOW. IVE BEEN WAITING ALL DAY, PLEASE. IM NOT GOING TO WORK JUST TO PAY FOR YOU TO STOP ME FROM GETTING MY FIX OF CRAZY EYES!”

-“Dar, chill it’s like, what? Twelve dollars a month”  -“eleven ninety-nine.”

- “Wait…why are you watching Orange is the New Black?”

-“you know what…forget it. ENJOY YOUR FREELOADING!” He slams the phone so quick. He doesn’t ask about the last show

-Darry hates Piper, thinks she’s a total bitch

-He watches all the trending shows or the unpopular documentaries there’s no in between

-He’s a HuGe fan of Stranger Things

-Watches Friday Night Lights thinking it’ll remind him of his high school days

-He threatens to cancel the subscription when the boys piss him off

-it’s such a powerful threat that it has never gotten to the point where he actually had to do it, they cut the shit immediately

-legitimately how he gets the boys to get their shit together

Ponyboy: -He convinced Darry by telling him that it would cost less than going to the movies all the time and a lot safer

-He’s the one constantly reminding everyone that it’s illegal to use their account because they’re cheating the company

-They all look at other with serious faces then turn back to Pony and laugh their asses off because the law has never stopped them before

-It makes Johnny feel bad but he needs his daily fix of One Tree Hill so he got over it

-The one watching The Great British Baking Show because the American version isn’t there but he finds the accents soothing

-He gets frustrated because he’ll think he knows what they’re making but it’s just a word used America that turns out to be a different thing in the U.K. (Stuff like Biscuits)

-tbh doesn’t know what they’re talking about half the time…that or has never heard of what they’re making in his entire young life

-He has the masked icon as his “who’s watching” profile picture

-He somehow managed to convince Darry to get the four screen plan but it was never so that the other guys could use too it was just because he wanted the higher HD quality they didn’t offer in the other plans

-If he watches something he’s ashamed of, knowing everyone has access to his history, he’ll go delete it

-Its like the My Little Pony marathons never happened

Sodapop: -The one who gave the rest of the gang the username and password

-Worst mistake ever because now Dallas has Darry’s credit card information

-He doesn’t watch a lot of Netflix he mostly only went to movies to make Pony happy he only really enjoyed a few

-His attention span is just too short he can’t sit still to watch a movie for an hour or two

-Despite that, he can binge shows if he wants to

-If he’s sad he’ll watch Clueless and quotes the shit out of it

-Honestly Soda is the type to watch anything from a kids movie to a documentary on GMO foods like he only uses Netflix when he has nothing else to do

-To him it’s just one of those apps you don’t want to delete because you might need it but you never really use it

-His icon is the penguin

-He wishes they had a blue penguin

-but they don’t so he settles for the orange one

-he’s called the company multiple times to complain he’s waiting for them to call back

Two-bit: -Fought Pony the first couple of days

-“SERIOUSLY? YOU WANT TO TAKE UP A SCREEN SO THAT I CANT WATCH MY OWN NETFLIX BUT LAST WEEK YOU COULDNT TAKE ME TO THE MOVIES?? YOU DIDNT EVEN HAVE TO STAY YOU COULD’VE WALKED AROUND THE MALL!!”

-“Listen, PoNyBoNeR. NOBODY and I mean NOBODY watches movies on Netflix it’s all about binging Baby Daddy, my friend.”

-“WEVE HAD THE ACCOUNT FOR A WEEK NOW YOURE SUDDENLY THE NETFLIX MASTER? WE HAVE SEVEN PEOPLE ON THIS ACCOUNT RIGHT NOW!”

-He ignores that last comment and answers the question, “Yes. And I say movies suck.”

-“DUDE the reviews for Wonder Woman were crazy I wanted to see it.”

-“Yeah, like I want to spend my precious time watching a lil twerp watch a chick flick.”

-Truth is he already went to see it five times

-Actually watches every show out there but mostly comedies

-Rewatches Friends all the time

-He’s never actually watched a movie tho

-He’s like Soda he can’t sit still long enough

-He wouldn’t have a problem buying his own account if he had to but using The Curtis’ is much more fun

-He had the free trial for a month but he canceled his subscription when it was over like he does with every other free trial

Dally: -Only uses the account to watch porn in good quality

-That’s literally it I’m serious he doesn’t care for tv shows or movies it doesn’t have any other use to him

-Well he’s waiting for a good investment to come along and then he’s swiping that credit card info so quick

-He doesn’t use it for show watching purposes but he does fuck around with profile names and changes the pictures to piss Soda off mostly

-He changes the penguin to the Panda and it is a problem because Soda likes penguins and Pandas just aren’t the same

Johnny:  -He watches the trendy shows and movies sometimes

-He takes Pony’s recommendations to heart because Pony loves this kinda thing so he figures Pony must know what he’s talking about

-He really likes Once Upon A Time

-And Raising Hope

-And literally any show that surrounds a group of friends because he relates to them for obvious reasons

-Okay but Gossip Girl is his shit

-The last profile has his name on it but the rest of boys share it

-Obsessed with Riverdale

-Pony didn’t fight with Johnny about using Netflix because he would tag along to movies before they got an account

 Steve: -Always pushed Darry to sign up for Hulu instead because they update faster and it’s the same price for no commercials as the 4 screen plan

-Helps Dally mess up the names

-Shamelessly watches whatever he wants

-Toddlers and Tiaras? Sure.

-My Little Pony? Yep.

-Cupcakes Wars? Hell yeah!

-Just no OITNB because that shit gets too crazy for him (RIP Dylan)

-Watches New Girl like it’s his religion

- He watched Family Guy and American Dad in the actual order they came out except for the first few seasons bc the quality/art style sucked

- He’s the type of person who need need needs to have something to snack on while he’s watching a show

-like he’ll plan it out or just save his food until he watches his show

-Laughed at Pony for spending all his time watching movies but now he never leaves his house because he’s binging shows

-They had the same conversation as the one with Two except Steve watched Wonder Woman seven times and once was with Sodapop who made him swear not to tell Pony

-But he’s a bitch so he exposed him when Soda refused to admit that Rainbow Dash is better than Pinky Pie

-Pony flipped

-Then Two came forward and it was a huge mess

 This is for @maxisprettygay and @matt-dillon-trash

IM STILL SO MAD LIKE WHY DIDNT IT POST?? But at least it’s going up now

#the gang #headcannons #netflix

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michaelfallcon · 6 years ago

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The Making Of A Master: Inside The Technivorm Factory

Only five people in the world, I’m told, possess the lapel pin: a golden hexagon with block serif letters split over two lines. One is the person whose dark glen-plaid blazer buttonhole I’m inspecting right now under institutional lighting in Amerongen, the Netherlands. His name is Frans van Cooten. His title nowadays is director and owner of Moccamaster Sales EU, one of three independent entities overseeing the majority of sales for the manufacturer known as Technivorm—which is also the word, shining in relief, on Van Cooten’s lapel.

2018 was a momentous year for the factory that created the world’s most enduring, stylish, and reputable home filter coffeemaker: the Moccamaster KBG 741. The year began sadly, with the passing of the machine’s inventor and Technivorm’s founder, Gerard-Clement Smit. In January, the engineer died at age 87. Years ago, he had given Van Cooten, his son-in-law, the Technivorm pin—although the first to receive one was Ina ten Donkelaar. She is not wearing it on the bright morning on which she tells me who is in the circle of pin-possessors, but no one doubts how close the brand is to her heart. She was Smit’s partner. Currently, Ten Donkelaar is Technivorm’s CEO and has been with the company, established in 1964, from early on. She remembers when Smit rented a workspace in the tiny village of Elst, in the province of Utrecht, initially producing stepladders and stacking shelves, followed by his first patented coffee grinder in 1965. She recalls when, in 1967, Technivorm moved to the neighboring village of Amerongen, right into Smit’s backyard, which was convenient, yet rough on his prune trees.

An original 1968 Moccamaster.

The rerelease of Technivorm’s first-ever coffeemaker made 2018 more celebratory. Developed in 1968 but launched a year later, the Moccamaster 69, named for its debut year, is smaller than the 741 (brewing up to eight, rather than 10, cups). With a round-edged hotplate tray and a circular heating tower and water reservoir, it very much appears to be of a curves-embracing era. Called the ’68 Jubileum, the rerelease retains those features, making it an unblinking fit into all the mid-century modern design resurrected of late. The limited-edition model has been available in Europe since March 2018. North America has had to be patient, as it is only scheduled for purchase there starting spring 2019.

Ten Donkelaar and Van Cooten receive me at Technivorm’s headquarters and factory in Amerongen. No longer occupying the family’s former garden, they have been situated in an industrial section of town since the late 1980s. Still, in the Netherlands, it’s hard to ever really get away from the pastoral; trees surrounding the premises are lush and across the road, I catch a couple of ponies grazing. In traditional Dutch office etiquette, a receptionist promptly offers drinks. White demitasses arrive, filled with a medium-dark roast provided by two-centuries-old Dutch roasters Smit & Dorlas. When I ask, perhaps a bit insipidly, if a Moccamaster was used, Van Cooten answers with an amiable “Jaaaa.” Downstairs, he volunteers, professional-line Moccamasters brew fresh batches for the factory staff. An 11 AM coffee break is another Dutch labor institution, but the punctuality of a koffiepauze is crucial when a production line is at stake, stresses Van Cooten. A bell goes off to let the workers know when it’s time for, as Ten Donkelaar puts it, “drinking coffee, getting a little baked good, and enjoying a smoke.”

Ten Donkelaar and Van Cooten

But upstairs, we are in what seems to be part boardroom—upholstered conference chairs tucked under laminate tables—and part museum. Exhibited in, on, and around glass-cased shelves are decades’ worth of artifacts: various models and iterations of home and commercial coffee machines, blade coffee grinders, hot plates, water boilers, and dispensers. Plus, there are samples of Smit’s pre-Technivorm inventions from when he was, essentially, a freelancer; highlights include a box of hot rollers and a snijbonenmolen (a string bean slicer, once considered a Dutch kitchen staple). The walls are like an open scrapbook, decorated with vintage corporate posters and multi-language ads from the past. On a stand of its own is a quilt: the batik-effect fabric with images of cups and beans features a dozen blocks, each with a uniquely hued 741 machine. It was occasioned by Technivorm’s golden anniversary, and the quilter was Kathleen Bauer, COO of Moccamaster USA, a second of Technivorm’s three related entities. Bauer is another pin-holder, and her craft brings some palpable Americana to the functionalism-driven European environs.

Moccamaster’s internal functions were uncovered by Popular Mechanics in a “disassembly report” detailing all 137 parts that are elegantly engineered into a single 741. The 2017 review praised it as “many coffee snobs’ brewer of choice,” though the machine’s appeal has undeniably broadened. The MoMa Design Store has sold it since 2016, and in June 2018, “new brides and brides-to-be” among Good Morning America’s staff ranked it their #1 wedding gift.

These days, the brand has distributors worldwide. Nevertheless, all Moccamasters continue to be constructed by hand and individually tested in the Netherlands. The manufacturer prides itself in using, whenever possible, recyclable or fully degradable materials sourced from within Europe, if not the Netherlands itself. New machines come with a five-year warranty, though tend to last far longer, being easy to repair or spruce up with replacement parts.

“We get lots of emails from customers asking, ‘Does the jug for the new 68 also fit in the old one?’ And they’re very happy to hear that it does,” says Van Cooten. The rerelease has a few technical updates, but “on functionality there is no difference.”

“This was the first ’68 model, back then called the ‘69,’” Ten Donkelaar specifies of an antique machine being stored behind glass. “We sold 769,473 pieces.”

The Jubileum ’68

In 2010, after selling off a local horse feed business inherited from his father, Van Cooten founded Moccamaster Sales EU. The move was steered by having agreed with Smit to find new markets for Moccamaster upon joining the enterprise of his spouse’s family. Clementine Smit, Van Cooten’s wife, once worked at Technivorm herself, though now is more likely to be found accompanying Van Cooten to coffee shows and festivals, he says, adding, “she know the product very well—she knows everything.”

Van Cooten and his team concentrated on Germany, Central Europe, and the UK. Scandinavia was not part of their remit because Technivorm had, since the early 1970s, been exporting to the region. It has remained the company’s biggest market for the last 30 years. Moccamaster Nordic, a third entity in the trio, handles these operations. Those strong ties are veritably sealed in a seal. Found on all Moccamasters is a sticker reading “approved” along with the name of the European Coffee Brewing Centre. Founded in 1975 in Oslo, the ECBC is an offshoot of the Norwegian Coffee Association, and testing brewers is its raison d’être.

Van Cooten explains: “In the Scandinavian countries, everyone knows about the ECBC, and our whole range passed this certification of brewing the perfect cup. For the ECBC, it’s not about the quality of the machine or the expected lifespan of the machine—they only certify based on achievement of the best brew, to reach the best extraction out of your coffee.”

To illustrate just how omnipresent, if not ho-hum, the Moccamaster is in the Nordics, Van Cooten asks if I’ve been tuning in to Dutch TV’s Detective Month, which airs crime series.

“If you watch the Scandinavian shows carefully,” he says, “probably at least once a week, you have a shot in the kitchen, no matter where the crime scene is, and they pour coffee with a Moccamaster.”

The younger of Van Cooten and Clementine Smit’s two children seems on track to wear a pin one day too. Rob van Cooten recently completed his third year of business school and has already done sales and marketing work in his father’s office. The elder Van Cooten says his son is interested in pursuing the family trade after graduating and getting some experience abroad. Daughter Floortje van Cooten keeps busy as an Amsterdam-based fashion blogger, though in a recent Father’s Day gift guide took the opportunity to call a Moccamaster the “best present there possibly is.” Her post spotlights a shiny stone gray KBG 741.

As Ten Donkelaar likes to say, the 741 is “an evergreen.” Developed in 1974, it hit the market two years later and today is the most iconic model. The Moccamaster remains one of several select home brewers certified by the SCA, reflecting its esteemed status among, to quote a Sprudge article on the brand’s Cup-one, “prosumer appliances.” It is true that Technivorm and specialty coffee have been friendly for decades. In 1988, the Dutch company became a founding member of the Specialty Coffee Association of Europe, and fast-forward to World of Coffee 2018, the Moccamaster stand was showing off the 741 in its latest colors: pastel green, pastel yellow, pastel blue, and midnight blue.

Globally, Technivorm and Moccamaster have about 200 employees. Amerongen hosts around 150. In August 2017, the European Coffee Trip published a cheerful video taking viewers inside the factory, profiling workers, and zooming in on the production line.

“We hope to build our 10 millionth this year,” Van Cooten said in that interview.

When, 11 months later, I follow up on the stated projection, he replies: “Yes, we did.”

Turns out, the 10 millionth coffeemaker was handed to Gerard-Clement Smit during a company celebration that coincided with the last birthday he lived to experience, in September 2017. The machine is a black and white Jubileum ’68. It is displayed in a hallway on an encased stand, with mini-spotlights flanking the keepsake. Above is a classic portrait of Smit, raising a cup to his smile. Below is the milestone, its numbers printed larger than all the other text, the Technivorm logo included.

“We just wanted to do the rerelease as an honor to Gerard,” Ten Donkelaar shares.

“But the second 10 million will not take that long,” she continues, returning to the brisker pace of business talk. “We are doing some internal movements to get more space for the production line. Last year, for the first time, we realized more than 500,000 machines—that was a lot of coffeemakers. And this year we will even sell more.”

Karina Hof is a Sprudge staff writer based in Amsterdam. Read more Karina Hof on Sprudge.

The post The Making Of A Master: Inside The Technivorm Factory appeared first on Sprudge.

The Making Of A Master: Inside The Technivorm Factory published first on https://medium.com/@LinLinCoffee

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mrwilliamcharley · 6 years ago

Text

The Making Of A Master: Inside The Technivorm Factory

An original 1968 Moccamaster.

Ten Donkelaar and Van Cooten

“This was the first ’68 model, back then called the ‘69,’” Ten Donkelaar specifies of an antique machine being stored behind glass. “We sold 769,473 pieces.”

The Jubileum ’68

To illustrate just how omnipresent, if not ho-hum, the Moccamaster is in the Nordics, Van Cooten asks if I’ve been tuning in to Dutch TV’s Detective Month, which airs crime series.

“We hope to build our 10 millionth this year,” Van Cooten said in that interview.

When, 11 months later, I follow up on the stated projection, he replies: “Yes, we did.”

“We just wanted to do the rerelease as an honor to Gerard,” Ten Donkelaar shares.

Karina Hof is a Sprudge staff writer based in Amsterdam. Read more Karina Hof on Sprudge.

The post The Making Of A Master: Inside The Technivorm Factory appeared first on Sprudge.

from Sprudge http://bit.ly/2FVbQrE

0 notes