#pomme's voice is just *chef's kiss*

[twiilys]

"Ma meilleure ennemie" by Stromae & Pomme - translation

how everyone's yeah me too. here's the lyrics (+ english translation) to that beautiful song playing in ep 7 :)

"Ma meilleure ennemie" ("My best enemy" note: this is in the feminine form, so implying a female You for all of Stromae's part)

Je t’aime je t’attends

(I love you, I await you) -> loops, sound crackling/electronic

[STROMAE]

T'es la meilleure chose qui m'est arrivée

(You're the best thing that happened to me)

Mais aussi la pire chose qui m'est arrivée

(But also the worse thing that happened to me)

Le jour où je t'ai rencontrée j'aurais peut-être préféré

(The day I met you I maybe would have preferred that)

Que ce jour ne soit jamais arrivé (arrivé)

(That day had never happened (happened))

La pire des bénédictions

(The worst of blessings)

La plus belle des malédictions

(The most beautiful of curses)

De toi je devrais m'éloigner

(From you I should distance myself)

Mais comme dit le diction

(But as the saying goes)

« Plutôt qu’être seul mieux vaut être mal accompagné »

(“Instead of being alone, better be in bad company”) -> note: the usual saying is "Mieux vaut être seul qu'être mal accompagné" (= "Better be alone than in bad company"))

[BOTH]

Tu sais ce qu’on dit

(You know what they say)

[STROMAE]

« Soit près de tes amis les plus chers »

("Be close to your dearest friends”)

[BOTH]

Mais aussi

(But also)

[POMME]

« Encore plus près de tes adversaires »

("Closer still to your opponents”)

REFRAIN

Je t’aime je t’attends

(I love you, I await you) -> in the background, sound crackling/electronic, grows in intensity during the refrain. I'd say the "I love you" part is the most clear

[STROMAE]

Mais ma meilleure ennemie c’est toi

(But my worst enemy it’s you)

Fuis-moi

(Run from me)

Le pire c’est toi et moi

(The worst is you and me)

[POMME]

Mais si tu cherches encore ma voix

(But if you still search for my voice)

Oublie-moi

(Forget me)

Le pire c’est toi et moi

(The worst is you and me)

Pourquoi ton prénom me blesse

(Why does your name hurt me)

Quand il se cache

(When it hides)

Juste là dans l’espace ?

(Right here in the space)

C’est quelle émotion... la haine

(What feeling is this, hatred)

Ou la douceur quand j’entends ton prénom ?

(Or sweetness/softness when I hear your name?)

Je t’avais dit

(I had told you)

« Ne regarde pas en arrière »

("Don’t look back")

Le passé qui te suit te fait la guerre

(The past that’s following you is waging war on you)

REFRAIN

[BOTH]

Mais ma meilleure ennemie c’est toi

(But my best enemy it’s you)

Fuis-moi

(Run from me)

Le pire c’est toi et moi

(The worst it’s you and me)

Mais ma meilleure ennemie c’est toi

(But my best enemy it’s you)

Fuis-moi

(Run from me)

Le pire c’est toi et moi

(The worst it’s you and me)

Je t’aime je t’attends

(I love you, I await you) -> loops until the abrupt end of the song, sound crackling as Pomme vocalises

[ryqoshay]

How to Handle a Nico: Pomme d’Maki

Primary Pairing: NicoMaki Words: ~2.4k Rating: K with just a hint of T Time Frame: Late during Maki’s 2nd year and Nico’s 4th year in college. Story Arc: Stand Alone

Author’s Note: I’m late for my timezone, but it’s still the 14th somewhere in the world! So... yay? Happy Velentine’s Day!

“Ne, Maki-chan.”

“Mmm?” The named redhead looked up from her book to see her raven-haired girlfriend leaning against the kitchen counter.

“Got any plans for the 14th?”

“The 14th?”

Wait for it. Nico knew Maki was in studying mode and it would take a moment for her to register the significance of… oh, there she goes. That’s the reaction she wanted.

“I thought that much would be obvious.” The younger girl stated.

“You thought what would be obvious?” The older girl couldn’t help teasing.

“Mohhh…” Maki protested. “It’s obvious that I’m going to go on a date with my girlfriend.”

Nico had to admit she was impressed Maki made it through the statement without stuttering. Of course, she also blessed Nico with an adorable blush as well, which always made the teasing worth it. Even after over a year of being together, officially, Maki would still get embarrassed when talking about their relationship, and Nico couldn’t help exploiting that fact for her cute reactions.

“Just like last year.” Maki added.

And technically, the year before that. Nico thought to herself. And the year before that. And the year before that…

“I thought Maki-chan didn’t have time for dates.” Just like last year. And the year before that. And…

Maki shot her a deadpan look. Cute.

“I suppose I could just stay in and study.” Maki stated flatly.

And that was exactly what Nico wanted her to say.

“You know, staying in might not be such a bad idea…” Nico pondered, complimenting her contemplative tone by putting a finger to her chin and glancing upward.

“Wha? Wait, I thought…” Maki protested.

“Valentine’s Day is to celebrate romance and couples and lovely dovely stuff, right?”

“Well, yeah…”

“But Nico is an idol, so Nico can’t be doing that kind of stuff.”

Now Maki tilted her head to the side. She had been able to return fire for the initial volley of teasing, but now she was confused. “We’ve been dating for over a year…” she pointed out.

“And we’ve gotten off lucky so far, but Nico can only make so many excuses.”

“Have your producers been accusing you of anything?”

“There are always going to be rumors, especially about the two of us, since we’ve been so close, even before we started dating.”

“So… do you not want to go on a date on Valentine’s?” There was no mistaking the disappointment in Maki’s voice.

“Of course Nico wants to spend time with her favoritest Maki-chan on Valentine’s.” Nico assured. “But maybe keeping a low profile this year might help me combat some of those rumors?”

“I suppose…”

“So, this year, how about we celebrate here?” Nico suggested. “I’ll make a super special Valentine’s meal for us. And you know, tomatoes are red and that’s one of the big colors of the holiday so…”

The change in demeanor was immediate. A home cooked meal made by her favorite chef and using her favorite ingredient was a temptation Maki seldom passed up. “I guess it can’t be helped.” The younger girl decided, turning her prior disappointment into some return teasing.

“I’ll be sure to decorate this place.” The older girl offered. “And we can still dress up. Maybe you can see what else your friend has in her closet?”

“You know I moved some of my own stuff from home. A while ago, in fact.”

“Well Nico can’t wait to see what Maki-chan chooses.” A timer going off caught her attention. “Oh, dinner’s done. Help me set the table.”

Maki nodded, closed her textbook and followed her girlfriend into the kitchen.

“Welcome home!” Nico called from the kitchen as she heard the door open. “Happy Valentine’s Day!” She added, knowing the identity of the new arrival without needing to see her.

“That smells delicious, Nico-chan.” Maki replied from the entry as she removed her shoes. “And the decorations are very… you.”

Nico chuckled at the observation. “Just trying to match Maki-chan’s Christmas zeal.”

Though delivered in a teasing tone, there was a lot of truth in the statement. Nico’s passion for the holiday had historically been strictly idol related, until she fell for Maki and it took on a new meaning for her. Then they started dating and it became her second favorite holiday overall, edged out ever so slightly by Maki’s birthday.

Nico smiled as she heard her girlfriend take a deep breath as she entered the kitchen.

“I’d tell you not to peek and ruin the surprise, but Nico knows she has more cards up her sleeves than just what you see here.”

“Tomato soup?” Nico could practically hear the salivation in Maki’s tone.

“Not just any tomato soup; Provencal tomato rice soup.”

“French?”

“Yup. Home of the pomme d’amour.”

“Home?” Maki closed the distance between the two and slid an arm around the other girl. “I thought tomatoes came from the Americas? Southern and Central?”

Nico giggled. Of course Maki would know her tomato history. “Yeah, but France is where they got the name.” She explained before turning her head to accept the kiss she knew her girlfriend wanted. “And Valentine’s is a day to celebrate love, thus pomme d’amour. Oh, and these are real pomme d’amours.”

“Pommes d’amour.” Maki corrected. “The apples are the plural, not the love.”

“Nico’s love for Maki-chan is plural.”

“I-I… I don’t get it?”

Nico laughed at her girlfriend's adorable reaction. “But as I was saying, these tomatoes are actually from France.”

“You had tomatoes shipped from France?”

“Well, their seeds at least. They’re a hybrid based off the Marmande and are called Marbonne.”

“You grew them?” Maki’s glance found the living room and drifted toward the hallway leading to the bedrooms. “Where? In Nozomi’s room?”

“At Eli’s. Hey!” Nico swatted Maki’s hand away. “When did you get that spoon?”

“I just…”

“You’ll be able to have as much as you want in a moment.” Nico pointed to the table. “Go sit down and I’ll bring this out and we can have a proper meal. No pouting.”

Maki pouted anyway.

“Alright, let me just get this off…”

Without a word, Maki’s reached up to beat Nico to the bow securing the cook’s apron. Nico relented and let her girlfriend untie the strings. She resisted the urge to tell Maki to be careful with her hair as Maki’s hands moved up to her neck. Thankfully, Maki seemed to realize that Nico had specifically chosen the apron with and adjustable neck strap and thus slowly and carefully worked the clasp loose to avoid the need of pulling it over Nico head.

“Had your fun?” Nico smirked once the apron was off.

“Some…” Maki admitted.

“Well we have all night to continue that kind of thing. But right now, Nico is hungry and knows Maki-chan is as well.” She glanced down, expecting confirmation from her girlfriend’s belly.

“Maybe if I could just taste…”

“Maki-chan is incorrigible.”

“Only because Nico-chan’s cooking is irresis…” Maki cut off as the inevitable growl finally came.

“Table. Now. Go.” Nico shooed the other girl away.

Maki took the hint this time and made her way to her chair. Nico followed with the soup.

“And now for the first course of Nico’s Super Special Valentine’s Day Tomato Banquet!” the raven-haired girl announced, ladling out a serving for both her girlfriend and herself.

“Tomato Banquet?” Maki’s interest was piqued. “You mean…?”

“Yup, you’ll soon find that tomatoes are not just in the appetizer.” Nico took her seat. “Bon appétit!”

Maki wasted no time in grabbed her spoon, filling it with soup and bringing it to her lips. “Mmmm… that’s so~ go~od!” Her eyes closed and her shoulders pulled up as she savored the aftertaste.

Nico felt herself smile as she watched the redhead go for another spoonful. Sure, Nico would agree that her cooking was superb, in fact she often bragged about her skill, but watching Maki’s reactions was far more enjoyable than eating it herself. As such, she was barely halfway through her own bowl when Maki was finished.

“More?”

“Please.”

“Alright, but be sure to leave room for the main course.”

Maki nodded enthusiastically before draining her second serving.

“Alright, on to course two.” Nico got up and made her way back to the kitchen. There, she retrieved a pan from the oven and moved its contents to a prettier serving plate. “Turkish style stuffed tomatoes!” She announced, bringing the food back to the table.

“You grew tomatoes from Turkey as well?” Maki asked in amazement.

“Yup!” Nico placed a couple tomatoes on each of their plates. “Diamontino is apparently a popular kind there, so it was easy to get the seeds. I wanted to find out more about them, but I guess there is a movie with that title, so I kept finding reviews about that instead of the tomatoes.”

Maki chuckled before slicing off her first bite. As far as Nico was concerned, Maki appeared to be on cloud nine as she savored each mouthful. Conversation was light and as tomato themed as the meal, but that was fine as both girls were happy; Maki with tomatoes and Nico in watching Maki.

“Ready for course three?”

“There’s another?”

“Dessert!”

Maki blinked. “A dessert made with tomatoes?”

Nico grinned before retrieving said dessert from the fridge. “Southern tomato pie from the United States.”

“Tomato… pie?”

“It’s popular during tomato season in the southern states.” Nico explained, dividing up the pie. “Obviously, February is a long way away from then, but when I’m growing them myself inside, it’s always tomato season.”

“And the tomatoes are… green?” Maki inspected the slice she had been given.

“Cherokee Green, in fact. They’re ripe even if they don’t look like it.”

“Interesting.”

“Yeah, I was skeptical at first, but the author of the recipe I found liked them, so we’ll see.”

Though initially seeming hesitant, Maki brought a sizable forkful to her mouth without a tasting nibble first. Her eyes told Nico everything before she spoke. “This is amazing, Nico-chan.”

“I’m glad.” Nico replied. “I must admit I was a bit worried about this one, but a tomato is a fruit like any apple or berry or whatever else you might want to put in a pie, so…”

“Tomatoes are actually berries,” Maki pointed out “unlike many things we call berries; strawberries or raspberries for example.”

“Of course, Maki-chan would know such things about her favorite food.” Nico laughed. “And now it’s time for the pièce de résistance!”

“There’s more after dessert?”

“Sort of.” Nico went to get the final item. “It’s edible, sure, but it’s more a gift than part of the meal.” She handed a colorfully wrapped box to Maki.

“Is it a chocolate tomato?”

Nico almost snorted. “Just open it already.”

Maki did as she was instructed. “Pomme d’Maki?” She read the label attached to the stem of the tomato within.

“The fruit of Nico’s labor.” Nico proclaimed proudly. “Literally. That is no ordinary tomato you are holding, Maki-chan, but a unique, special hybrid made by me.”

“You… bred a new cultivar of tomato… for me?” Maki’s voice wavered a bit.

“I first cross-pollinated the Cherokee Green with the Diamontino and the Marbonne with some local Momotaro, then did the same the two results, which lead to the creation of the Pomme d’Maki!”

“That’s… three generations…” Maki thought aloud “At least, assuming you didn’t have issues with the cross-pollination. And with each generation being…” She looked up at Nico “You’ve…” She swallowed. “You’ve been planning… this…” She choked on the last word.

“Pretty much since Valentine’s of last year.”

“Nico-chan, that’s…” She cut off again, this time reaching out and pulling Nico into a hug. From her sitting position, she buried her face in Nico’s chest. “That’s so amazing…” She managed to get out while trying valiantly to hold back the tears. “… no’ fair…” Nico could barely make out the murmur.

“Nico sometimes has to think outside the box when it comes to getting gifts for someone like Maki-chan.” Nico admitted, patting her girlfriend on the head.

“…an’ you…” Came a muffled thanks.

Nico chuckled. “You’re welcome, Maki-chan.”

It took a good several minutes before Maki was able to compose herself again and slowly pulled away from Nico.

“Say, uhm… I hate to ask…” Maki’s hand went up wipe the moisture from her eyes before she started to twirl her hair as she thought about how to phrase her question. “What happened to all of the other tomatoes?”

“Don’t worry, Maki-chan.” Nico laughed. “They didn’t go to waste. Some I gave to Eli and Nozomi in thanks for helping me tend to the plants, but most I used in my cooking here.”

Maki furrowed her brow. “But I would have tasted the difference with the Marbonnes or seen the color of the Cherokee Green.”

“I figured your discerning taste would figure it out if I used them on their own, so I blended them with the Momotaros you’re used to.” Nico explained. “There was a reason I chose that kind as the fourth for the cross-pollination process.”

“Wait, you told me you found a better supplier and that’s why the tomatoes tasted better.”

“Technically I did find a better supplier; me.”

Maki opened her mouth as though to protest, but closed it again, realizing Nico had made a good point. “Anyway, d’Amour shouldn’t be abbreviated since the romanization of my name starts with an M.”

Nico knew Maki was just covering her embarrassment from her emotions earlier and not actually criticizing her gift and so she just shrugged. “I’m not French.”

“Yeah, but… oh never mind.” Maki stood up and pulled Nico in for another hug. “Thank you, Nico-chan. This has been an amazing Valentine’s Day. But I kind of feel bad that all I brought for you in return are chocolates.”

“The same chocolates you’ve given me since high school?”

“Yeah…”

“I love those chocolates, Maki-chan. And I love that it’s become a tradition that you give them to me every year.”

“I love you, Nico-chan.” Maki leaned down.

“I love you too, Maki-chan.” Nico tilted her chin up to accept the kiss. “So,” she said, pulling away after a moment “what do you want to do next? We have plenty of the evening left for a movie or… ah!” She gasped slightly as she felt a tug on the zipper on the back of her dress. “Or I suppose we could pick up where we left off with the apron…” She decided, pushing back up for another kiss.

Author’s Notes Continued in Followup Post

[tisfan]

34: “I turned out liking you a lot more that I originally planned.” For either Winteriron or Steve and Tony friendship?

The Toast 

Bucky was never going tocomplain, exactly, about being required to kiss Tony, but he did wish thatClint, Sam, and Scott hadn’t decided to try very hard to time all the clinkingof forks against cups for right before Bucky stuck a bite of food in hismouth.

It wasn’t fair at all,really, he decided, turning to his newly minted husband and kissing the side ofTony’s smirk. He loved his husband, he did, but he was also aware that Tony(well, Pepper, but details) had arranged for some of the best reception food inthe world, made fresh by master chefs, and Bucky wasn’t getting to eat anyof it.

“Quick, eat now,” Tonysaid quietly, and stuffed a forkful of something in his mouth. Under the table,he squeezed Bucky’s thigh, and he winked.

Bucky managed to get inone little appetizer thing, tomato and cheese with balsamic glaze served ontiny little plates with tiny little forks, a cone of seaweed wrapped aroundsome seared tuna, and actually took a gulp of his wine before someone elsestarted the glass thing.

“They’re gonna starve met’death and then what good will I be to you,” Bucky said, barely shutting uplong enough to press his lips against Tony’s, the words buzzing against Tony’smouth.

Tony leaned in closer,brushing his lips over Bucky’s ear. “There’s a picnic hamper waiting for us inthe limo.”

“You know me so well,”Bucky said. He hadn’t eaten breakfast; wedding nerves, Natasha had said,teasing him. He linked his fingers with Tony’s, turning Tony’s hand to watchthe light glitter off the wedding band that Bucky had placed there not but anhour ago.

(more below the cut)

“Also, I’ve been to afew weddings in my day,” Tony said. “It didn’t seem likely that we’d get to eatmore than a few nibbles.”

“Seems a waste t’ justfeed the bird-brains,” Bucky said, mock-glaring at Clint from the main table,where the archer was currently making inroads on a slider burger and mini pommefrites. “Coulda just gotten pizza.” But at least he did get to clean theplate that someone had set in front of him, before it was whisked away again.

Eating one handed wasn’tthe easiest thing in the world, but he didn’t really want to let go of Tony’shand either.

Steve, looking dapper inhis tuxedo -- a black base, with red and gold accents, which made Steve, atleast, appear slightly diabolical -- stood up, then, raising his glass. He didnot clatter his fork against it, however, just waited until the wedding partysettled down. It didn’t take very long; Steve had that sort of presence,really.

“So, uh, Buck. Tony.Congratulations on your nuptials,” Steve said. There was a smattering ofapplause and Steve’s neck colored a bit.

“I got not idea whathe’s gonna say,” Bucky told his husband in a hushed tone.

“Me either,” Tonywhispered back. “He tore up the pre-written speech I gave him.”

Bucky blinked. “Youwrote… a speech. For my best man?” Huh. Bucky wished that he had thought ofthat. Not that he expected Rhodes to have done anything else aside from tear upBucky’s speech, too. But it might have been funny.

“It was a masterpiece,”Tony informed him. “Witty, brief, touching. Now we’re going to have to listento him ramble about, I don’t know, back alley fistfights and my dad orsomething.”

“I gotta say, when Iwoke up in this bold new future, I wasn’t that impressed,” Steve said. “Notwith the future, and not with-- well, much of anyone that I met, either. To sayTony and I were not well suited to be teammates, much less friends, would beputting it mildly.”

Bucky didn’t quite drophis face into his hands and groan. No one really knew what footage thatSteve had seen about Iron Man, but nearly everyone had seen the footage ofSteve and Tony almost coming to blows aboard the helicarrier. Trust Steve tobring that up, now. “Don’t divorce me,” Bucky practically begged, keeping hisvoice low.

Tony squeezed his hand,chuckling a little. “Should’ve gone with my speech,” he said sagely.

“I maintained for quitea while that Tony was everything that I didn’t like about the future; bright,loud, flashy, arrogant.”

There were scatteredchuckles at that, and Sam actually was fucking applauding, the ass.

“That part’s hard torefute,” Tony admitted, in a more or less normal tone of voice.

“So, listen close, here,because I’m about to say something astonishing,” Steve said. He paused,dramatically.

“I kinda miss theshowgirls, dancing behind him, when he gives speeches,” Bucky said.

“I was wrong,” Stevesaid. “Wrong about Tony, and wrong about myself. It wasn’t the bright, loud,flashy parts of him that I didn’t like. What I didn’t like was that he remindedme, desperately, of someone I’d lost. Someone who would have been fascinated towake up in the future, someone who would have been delighted. Who would haverun from building to computer to smart phone in a display of glee, wanting toknow at every turn ‘what does this button do?’ In short, I resented Tony,because I knew Bucky would have liked him, so very much. And Bucky wasn’t here,to meet him.”

Steve raised his glass.“In short, I turned out liking you a lot more that I originally planned. And,not that Buck has ever needed it, but you have my blessing, and hopes for along and fruitful relationship.”

Tony looked, in a word, astonished.His mouth hung open, just a little, and his eyes were bright with unshed tears.He held onto Bucky’s hand like a lifeline, as if that were the only thingkeeping him from washing away on the tide of sentiment. It took him an obviousmoment -- and a hard swallow -- to recover his wits. “Fruitful may be anissue,” he pointed out in a voice that cracked a bit. “I keep telling you, Cap,the biology doesn’t work like that.”

Rhodes leaned over andsaid, in an obviously-meant-to-be-heard undertone, “Tony once told me that thefirst rule of engineering was to assume that the laws of physics don’t apply toyou.”

Bucky snorted, not quitechoking on his wine, but close to it. “He certainly was right about one thing,”Bucky said, brushing his fingers over Tony’s cheek. “I like you, so verymuch.”

Tony leaned in to kisshim, eyes shining, and murmured, “Good. Because you’re stuck with me now,husband.”  

[diagk]

Harel Deliss

Lesson Seven:  Keeping secrets comes at a price.

if you prefer to read it on AO3 then here’s the link

I took a deep breath and knocked on the door before pushing it open.

“Mr. Harel?” I asked, taking in the sight before me. Dorian was sitting behind the desk and Solas was standing next to it holding some papers in his hand. Upon seeing me his furrowed brows relaxed and a tentative smile appeared on his face.

“I think we can postpone the discussion of disposing off the health inspector for a moment. I suspect that Miss Lavellan will be eager to hear what you want to tell her.”

Solas’ scoff wasn't very convincing as his lips were fighting a losing battle between disapproval of Dorian and happiness to see me.

The other man closed the door softly behind himself, leaving us to stand in silence and looking at each other. Solas’ gaze was a mixture of happiness and uncertainty, eagerness and doubt. I suspected he was unsure of my reaction to him. None of us was ready to break the awkward silence. My heart was beating more frantically with each passing minute; I had doubts myself on how to approach him. Our dispute on Saturday and then his declaration and the following conversations throughout the whole Sunday shone a bit more light on his personality. I've learned a lot about him, much more than I expected after the outburst. He wasn't shy with his questions either. So today we met as new people, equipped with knowledge about the other one.

But I could not do it. I couldn't…

“Mr. Harel, I wanted to apologise for my unprofessional conduct towards you,” I said quietly.

His smile faltered and confusion showed in his eyes.

“Ellana, I hoped that we-you…” he fumbled for words.

“It seems that we need some time to re-evaluate our priorities, Mr. Harel. We are so different and I think that our expectations are not similar.”

“Expectations? Ellana-“ he sighed, “what are you talking about?” He took a couple of steps towards me but stopped at my raised hands.

“I'm sorry, Mr. Harel. I would prefer to keep it strictly professional. Unless you want me to quit.”

He eyed me with disbelief. This was not what he was preparing himself for. Some snarky comments, maybe a bit of teasing. A long apology and hundreds of kisses. But this? And she expected him to let her go?

“If you need time to think about this then I will wait,” he admitted moving closer and ignoring her halting hands. Which now were splayed on his chest. Holding him back and yet grounding. “Take your time to figure out what you need, my heart.” Her eyes widen at this.

He took a step back and schooled his features to a polite mask. “I see no reason for letting you go, Miss Lavellan. You've been an exceptional employee and worthy of my respect. I hope you'll continue your excellent work for me.”

His throat constricted at a mere thought of her leaving. He could live with her being at a distance as long as he did not lose sight of her. There was always hope he'll win her heart back.

I tried to compose myself and seeing him doing his best to accept the personal rejection, but not the professional one, helped me. He continued looking at me in this unique way of his. How I longed to touch him; to chase away the sadness hiding in his eyes; to make his lips curve in a sly smile. But I couldn't.

“Very well,” I agreed, my voice shaking slightly. “I will return to my duties if you permit.”

A long inhaled breath on his part and slight clench of his jaws. He was trying to remain calm. His voice left him so he nodded and then looked at her closing the door.

The feelings, kept under control so far, sprung to the surface. He bit on his hand to muffle his screaming. Still, a long sob managed to escape his mouth when he took a breath. It was not supposed to happen this way. It was not—

He has only himself to blame, hasn't he? Was he not such an ass towards her; was he not ignorant of her circumstances, he might have had his arms around her, holding her close, whispering soft words into her ear as he longed to do. They could have shared a night full of passion and love. They could have had time for each other. Instead his know-it-all and showing-off attitude made him almost lose her. If she was considering a possibility to leave her job, which she needed desperately, he learnt recently, then he was a fool. Such a fool.

He sat down in the chair and raked his fingers along his scalp. How did he arrive at this point? How did he manage to mess up this, with her? With all his self-confidence and experience, how did he manage to make this wrong? To ruin something so pure and so important? Something he long for—

“Ahh, there you are!” A cheerful voice of his friend filled the air. Solas sighed quietly.

Dorian went to the bar and made himself a drink rambling about his quick-around-the-corner-shopping adventure. “…and it’s really important, as…” he paused for an effect before turning to face his friend, “I have an important da—you look like you were just hit by a train.” Dorian’s voice turned from excited to flat.

Solas sighed again and kept looking at the papers scattered across the desk.

“What happened?” He heard. “Is it about Ellana?”

His vision got blurry. Hearing her name made his heart clench and he did not swallow the tears this time. They run freely from his eyes. Fenedhis. He did not cry since—. He took a long breath.

“What happened?” A soft inquiry this time.

He looked at his friend. “She broke up with me,” he choked the words out between his sobbing. In a matter of seconds he was enveloped in an awkward side-embrace. “There, there. You know I’m not good with this. Please stop. She’s in the kitchen, so nothing is lost. Just go and talk to her.”

“She wants to keep things professional. Nothing more. Strictly professional.” His voice barely a whisper.

“Well, at least she doesn’t leave us without the chef de pâttiserie, right?”

A hard look from Solas gives him a pause. “Come on. She’s there; just go and apologise!”

“I tried to do it. And she just decided that we have different expectations!” He rose from the chair and started pacing the room. “As if she knew what I really wanted! As if she could realise what she means to me!”

Silence filled the room. Broken by soft breathing and quiet choking.

“Did you tell her that?” Dorian asked after a few minutes of silence when he decided his friend was calm enough to talk.

Solas looked at him. “No.”

Dorian shook his head and sighed loudly. “Then you’re an idiot. What man do not speak his mind in a situation like this? Why did you not tell her how you feel; or what you wanted?”

Solas looked to the side ashamed. “She’s made her decision already.”

“And you did not try to change her mind? You? Of all the people I met you’re the only one who can win any argument. And you’re telling me that you could not persuade her to give you a chance to continue… whatever this is between you two.”

His brows furrowed as he looked outside at the starting of the day. People already were filling the streets. Walking the dogs, jogging, carrying their favourite coffee and talking on the phones, and he was sad. He felt alienated from this life. Away, so far away...

“Solas,” Dorian’s voice reached him through the mist, “you’re doing it again.” He shook his head.

His friend was right, he was trying to crawl into his little shell where no one and nothing could reach in and hurt him. It was never good to feel isolated and he thought he had managed to stop doing it. A long and heavy sigh left his lips and covered the glass of the window. He needed to fight for her, win her affection and trust. He turned towards his associate and nodded to him.

“Thank you, my friend. You've been there for me in the worst moments in my life. This one is, as far as I recognise, the most challenging. I would appreciate your support and discretion in this matter.”

A quirked eyebrow. “Whenever have I been indiscreet, Solas? You know you can count on me.” A sigh and soft smile. “I can see what she means to you, so as a friend that I am, I will help you to win her back. She won't be able to resist our charming personas combined. Well, at least not mine,” Dorian ended up with a devious smile.

Solas could not resist and chuckled. His friend always knew how to lift his spirit.

“Yes, it is indeed very difficult to resist you.”

“Ha! Of course, I'm irresistible. Now, tell me exactly what's happened. We still have time before you're due in the kitchen. I will deal with the Witch myself and you're going to take a break. I'm sending you home.” Dorian exclaimed resolutely.

Solas furrowed his eyebrows. A raised finger stopped him from speaking.

“As the co-owner of this flourishing establishment and a good friend of yours I'm kicking you out today. You need some rest, my friend. Go home, take a bath, have some wine, and relax.”

“That's your idea of me relaxing?” Solas asked with laughter.

“Don't try to deny that you don't do that?” Raised eyebrow and corner of his mouth told him that Dorian would not buy his denial.

“Fine. I'll do exactly what you said.” Solas agreed.

“Good. Now spill the beans about this sordid affair of yours.”

*

“Will that be enough?” Harding, my new assistant, worried. She was a small girl, with a big smile on her face. Her positive attitude towards others won her the hearts of the kitchen staff within days. Her nibble fingers and sense of creativity made her an excellent worker. She liked to experiment and was happy to stay extra hours to try a recipe or two.

I looked at her and smiled. “It will be. It's better to have less than too much and then throw it away.”

She hummed in agreement.

“Besides, we will be making the ‘pommes et framboises au chocolat’ so that will cover any gourmands if required.”

She hummed again and then looked behind me. “You would not want to discuss it with Mr. Harel?” She asked quietly. I did not dare to turn around. I could sense him for the last hour but refused to acknowledge his presence. He was my boss and nothing more. And yet, I was aware he was there, I could hear him giving instructions and talking to Patrick. He managed to get closer to me at some point, letting the servers to pass with dishes, and his cologne enveloped my senses. His scent made my heart go faster and my mouth water and yet I refused to turn towards him.

“No, it is fine. I will discuss it with him tomorrow.” The cakes were ready to be stripped and sliced and I focused on doing exactly that.

“Shall I start on the chocolate fondue?” Her eyes brighten. It was her favourite flavour. She could eat chocolate in any shape or form. I smiled and nodded before returning to my task.

“Maybe you should take a break?” Skinner patted my back waving her e-cig at me. I smiled and looked around. A mistake. I caught him staring at me, longing in his eyes.

“Yeah, sure.” I nodded to Harding and then followed Skinner outside.

She lasted three minutes before stating. “You broke up.”

A hitch in my breathing was enough an answer to her.

“If you need to talk, or…” she trailed off while her eyes scanned the buildings around. A puff of smoke left her mouth. “I'm here.”

Nails dug into my palms, my breathing accelerated and yet I found myself nodding. “Thank you. Truly.”

She smiled somewhat sadly. “He adores you.”

Another hitch.

“He's been looking at you since he came into the kitchen. His eyes just return to you. And he's hurt as you do not look at him. So….what he's done?”

“Being an ass. No, it's not that. Well…not only that. We aren't compatible…no, that sounds wrong. We come from different backgrounds and we were raised to meet different expectations and…”

“You're rambling,” she stated when I paused to take a breath. “Now, what it the real issue here?”

Should I tell her the truth? I didn't want to lie but … “It just didn't work.” I settled for the lamest excuse ever.

She snorted and shook her head. “You've been elated and excited since it's started. Please tell me I'm wrong but…you're in love with him, right? And he reciprocates so very gladly. I've never seen him smiling so much and actually interacting with us. It all happened after you two hooked up. It's good for both of you. So, excuse me if all this ‘it wasn't working’ BS doesn't work on me.”

“We can't be together.” My voice just above whisper.

“Well if you don't want to talk yet— it's fine.” She pocketed her e-cig. “I'm here if you need anything though. And give yourself time, think it through, maybe there's a way to salvage this yet. There's always hope as long as you keep trying.”

She was smarter than I gave her credit it seemed. We shared a hug and went back to the kitchen.

He was still there. Our eyes met and he smiled. I returned to my station and pretended it didn't affect me. I was on edge until he left an hour later. A pang gripped my heart when Dorian mentioned that Mr. Harel left for the day. It was his right to do so and yet…I missed him. It seemed that I wasn't the only one. The beautiful health inspector was following Dorian who was doing his best to satisfy her questioning. Luckily, they did not stay too long in the kitchen and moved to the restaurant to have tea. As Skinner said, she was stunning. I could not comprehend how Solas would not be interested. I also could understand that she may not be accustomed to rejection. There was beauty and grace in her movements, charming tenor of her voice, lovely smile and intelligent eyes. Education, money and a prestigious job. I sighed thinking about myself. How could I compare to her?

I was sulking for the remainder of the day. Even Harding’s jokes could not change my mood. Skinner threw glances at me and shook her head on a couple of occasions. At the end of my shift she murmured into my ear: ”You need a drink. And a fuck. Please arrange both yourself as I may not be too considerate while choosing in your stead.”

So…I went home. Got a bottle out of the cupboard and got drunk. I didn't want to think about a fuck as there was only one man who came to my mind. The drink made me fall into a dreamless sleep and for once I was grateful for that.

thank you again to my Beta :)))